2004-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: add to da page ya nimrods!!! 2004-08-31 [Mystal]: No.. I don't think I want.. to be.. served. 2004-09-03 [punkin22(need someone who cares)]: your crazy dustin 2004-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo mama... 2004-09-05 [Tienshi]: thanks for the invite 2004-09-06 [Bringer of Nightmares]: mmmmmmmmm 2004-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmmmmmmmm?! 2004-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: bet ya like # 7, eh? 2004-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2004-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: Yea I'd like 1 uncooked ham, 1 bowl of lard, and 2 crap-a-la-commode's. Thank you! XD 2004-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: would you like fries with that? 2004-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: no thank you, I don't eat safely prepared food anymore 2004-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: hehe 2004-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry, it's not... 2004-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: then in that case, I want! 2004-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: how bout some un blended, unsmushed, ketchup? (a tomato) 2004-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: hmm....sounds too ordinary...add some onions and I'll take it 2004-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smashes the tomato with an onion* here ya go! 2004-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: Yummy! *walks over to a table and starts eating her "food"* 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: god! dustin....u r an idiot....and a dirty ho! 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: no, i'm a clean ho! 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: no a dirty ho....dirtiest 1 there is..... 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: what about you?! are you that bad off to forget yourself?!!! 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: oh how dare u!!!!!! 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR HAR!!! 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: i may b 1 but u r the dirty 1!!!!! 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: yes..... 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: yes.... 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: u r such a dork! 2004-09-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-15 [sara(:]: quit saying that!!! 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [and i was a kaleidoscope]: ello ello 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: we' howdy feller... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: yes u will!!! 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: u r soooooo gay..... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: yup.... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: i will defeat u one day.....i have already killed some1 on here u better watch it! 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: yes i have 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: ask[Lilly_Cortez] she is the one i killed but i brought her back 2 life....lucky 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: then that don't really count now does it? 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: i chose 2 bring her back 2 life do not make me draw my sword... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: u don't have a sword... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: that;s what u think..... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: whatever... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: 5 more people till I got 500 people to take my poll!!! 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: okey dokey i don't care 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: 500!!! YEAH BABY!!! 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: i bet u did them urself 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: yeah cause ur the only friend u have and even u don't like urself that much 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-16 [sara(:]: shut up 2004-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: coooooool... lots of html tags... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: hello people 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: "people"?! yeah right... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: lol ok hello dustin. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: hi... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: I joined, aren't you happy? lol. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: for now... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: heh. i just found jr's name on here! sir soapy! i feel so stupid because it was on the tribute yeah he did put that on there i like the lyrics to that song so.. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: we've started a tribute to Autumn now... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: I know, she told me. Why did you two make a tribute for me? 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have no idea... ask Jr... he handed me a piece of paper and said it was a tribute to you... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: lol right on. how long did it take? 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: like 3 days... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: oh cool. thank you, it made me laugh. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: it was the stupidist thing I've ever seen... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: but it was funny, and i don't laugh that often now. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: you should see some of the other "stuff" me an' Jr. put on paper 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: what stuff? 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: like comics and drawings... recently I made "Adventures of La Ham" 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Jr.'s makin' one called "Bob's Diner" 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: oh, yeah, I miss your stick man comics. oh, did you draw that picture of mew on your house? 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: its good 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: da scanner did it wrong or sumthin... the colors are messed up 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: yeah but its still good. scanners always mess color up 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: mew and mewtwo are the only "cool" pokemon... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: yeah, i'm not really into pokemon either but its still a good drawing =p 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I finished my 5 page stickman I was workin on last year... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: oh thats cool, when i move back to susan moore i want to read it 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: when ya movin back? 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: christmas, hopefully, if not then i'll be back next year. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Jr. shall hear of this... 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: brb... im goin to check Jr.'s mail... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: lol ok i sent him a message.... 2004-09-17 [Sir Soapy]: omg its like you!!! lol hey?!!! 2004-09-17 [Sir Soapy]: he only gets on at school... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: lol yeah i guessed 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: he claims he's getting a computer soon, but I dout it... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: yeah...i can't survive without my computer. how's school without me btw... 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: HORRIBLE!!! j/k... science teachers a quack and our reading teacher is a hamster... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: lol/ my school really does suck...no friends. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: where's it at? 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: its in snead its call crossroads christian academy. its near snead tire and all of the parts places 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: lol yeah i don't know how to explain it really. i hate the place. 2004-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, g2g... see ya feller 2004-09-17 [dark starlight]: ok ttyl 2004-09-18 [PixieStickChick]: I'm curious, what's in the "mystery meat juice"??? 2004-09-18 [dark starlight]: are you sure you wanna know? 2004-09-18 [PixieStickChick]: yes....I think... 2004-09-18 [dark starlight]: well...I'm guessing its juice from a mystery meat? 2004-09-18 [PixieStickChick]: well, I guessed that much too...but what's the 'mystery meat'? 2004-09-18 [dark starlight]: lol its a mystery? 2004-09-18 [PixieStickChick]: but I want, no NEED to know!! It's in my nature ^_^ 2004-09-18 [dark starlight]: lol I see....Dustin is the only one that can tell you that, Bob isn't as talkitive these days.... 2004-09-18 [PixieStickChick]: *pouts* I hate waiting 2004-09-18 [dark starlight]: lol me too. 2004-09-18 [PixieStickChick]: I'll be back in an hour or so, gotta go pick up my brother 2004-09-18 [dark starlight]: oh ok lol I'll probably be gone by them. Take care.... 2004-09-19 [JJLS]: i love bob's diner 2004-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't we all... 2004-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: the mystery meat is some strange lump I found on the road... 2004-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: if you like it... JOIN IT!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! 2004-09-20 [sara(:]: would that lump be you dustin? 2004-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... twas yer mama... 2004-09-21 [PixieStickChick]: so the mystery meat might not even be meat? 2004-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... 2004-09-21 [PixieStickChick]: Oh...*backs away slowly* 2004-09-23 [sara(:]: yes that would b a good thing to do pixie 2004-09-24 [Hermes322]: ewwwwwww 2004-09-24 [Hermes322]: wtf are you people eating?? 2004-09-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: You don't want to know... 2004-09-24 [Kiristo]: omg what the hell is all this crap!? 2004-09-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: YOU DON'T WANT TO KNOW!!! 2004-09-24 [Hermes322]: Okay.....I'm leaving....this is disgusting... 2004-09-24 [punkin22]: *hugs garfield the cat* hey dustin i luv u! 2004-09-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: if you loved me you might have noticed the link to the page your supposed to join... 2004-09-24 [il-gatto-nero]: lol where am i? 2004-09-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: my world, now join it! 2004-09-24 [laney loves cody]: hello im here mm the food was good 2004-09-24 [PixieStickChick]: I'd like to place an order please 2004-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure, our special today is soft tacos from taco bell... 2004-09-25 [PixieStickChick]: sounds good! I'll have one of those 2004-09-25 [dani california 311]: um.....hi 2004-09-25 [punkin22]: dustin, have you ever ate any of this crap? 2004-09-25 [punkin22]: oh...... hey dboy!! 2004-09-25 [PixieStickChick]: I have! *muches into her uncooked ham* it's quite good! 2004-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: piggy! poor pig... 2004-09-25 [sara(:]: yes dustin poor u... 2004-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!!! 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: You can order bob's mom??? 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup! 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: OMG! I've always wanted Bob's Mom!!! *jumps with joy* 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: she's $1 an hour... 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: *hands you a $20* There, now leave me and bob's mom alone! lol 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... that's 20 hours! you get a free drink to go with that! *hands you a mug of liquid lard* 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: Ooohh!! YUM!! 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Also, as our best customer, I present you with... a... free... HALF CRACKER!!! 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry, there's no need to thank me! you deserve that half a cracker! 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: DON'T CLICK THIS!!! 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: YAY!! I got a half a cracker!!! *happy cracker dance* 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: don't click, huh....Well, I'm gonna click it anyway!! *sticks out tongue* 2004-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: I gotta go. your in temporary command of the restuarant till I get back... 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: WOOT!! *rubs hands evily* 2004-09-26 [PixieStickChick]: Alright you heard him, I'm in charge!! Everyone strip and place your hands on the wall! *evil laugh* 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh oh... I'M BACK!!! EVERYONE OFF MY WALLS! I JUST CLEANED THEM! 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: *walks in* hello evrybo....dy? *backs away slowly* 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: get back here! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll order you a Sir Loin... on the house! 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: *stops* ummm yeah i think i'll.....take one of those....ummm....dustin....y does everyone have their clothes off? *tries not 2 look around but can't help herself* 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't ask... 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: ok....but ummm....y do u have urs off 2? 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles innocently* it's casual fri-... er, I mean monday! 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: hmmm...* thinks about it* nah never mind.... 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: how bout a nice big mug of "mystery meat juice"? 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: umm no thanx...not thirsty... 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, our special today is leg of lamb... 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: oh ok sure i'll have one of those.... 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *rips a lamb's leg off* here ya go!!! *throws it at your head* 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whispers to Bob* "Lets hope she don't order tommorows special..." 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: hey! what was that?! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR!!! would you like some ketchup to go with tha-... HEY!!! STUPID 3-LEGGED LAMB!!! STOP MAKING NOISES!!! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: I should put a warning about this wiki... 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: yes u should....send me a message on linkmeet! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: already have... 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: you want a noisey "3-legged lamb"? he's free... 2004-09-27 [sara(:]: umm no thanx....i already got one....sry.. 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... 2004-09-27 [Sir Soapy]: ...huh hu 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: *tilts head to side* did I miss something? 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: only World War Three... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: damn! 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: btw, I see you're back, does that mean I'm not in charge anymore?? 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... you can be chef though! our original chef, Chef Zef, fell in a boiling pot of raw liver and was cooked alive... that reminds me, I gotta add sumthin new to the menu... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: It'd be an honor to be chef for such a...fine diner! I can be Chef Steph! lol 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: that means... FREE MEALS!!! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, Chef Steph, we need an order of boiled Chef Zef, Sir. Loin, and some raw liver on rye! 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: Coming right up! *hands you your order* 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... Mr. Osama is it? that'll be $14.81! Thank you, and come again! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: dang! that guy looks familiar... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: what looks familiar? 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: that guy that just ordered... the "Osama" feller... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: oh...I knew that 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: what looks familiar? that turban, beard, robes... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: all of the above? 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: nevermind... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: ...lost... 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: so I noticed... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: *stares blankly* huh? 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *slaps his head* 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: this converstion is almost as bad as the food here... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: Must go now, see ya later gator 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: sadly, I must agree on that 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: gator?! now thats goin on the menu... 2004-09-27 [PixieStickChick]: lol! byes 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: tootles poodles... 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... poodles! 2004-09-27 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm only joining so that the stupid little Bob doesn't die! 2004-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey doke! 2004-09-27 [Angelic nightmares]: write back to my message......before I cry 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... hi? 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: *walks in w/ eyes covered just in case* dustin...do u have ur clothes on? 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... for now... Today's special is, Leg of Bob! For only $4.19! Get it now before we run out of stock! (or until Bob runs out of legs) 2004-09-28 [PixieStickChick]: The only reason anyone has clothes on is because I'm not in charge. Muahahaha!!! 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... everyday from now on, I must state the special of the day to the customers... 2004-09-28 [Sir Soapy]: who's this Bob feller?! and what is his position in this Diner?! 2004-09-28 [PixieStickChick]: I don't know...I just cook him. 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: poor bob.... 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: hush you darned bathroom janitor! 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: ha ha ha! wait u were talking 2 jr......right? 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: I live a double life... UNTIL THE TUB OF LARD GETS THE FREAKIN INTERNET! 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: *laughs and nearly chokes on the leg of bob she's eating* 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: here *hands you some blended lizard eyes* 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: *takes it* thanks! *drinks it* mmmm...tastey! 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: would you like some artichoke pie? if you order 2, you get one free! 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: hmmm...*thinks about* no that's way 2 healthy for me.... 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, how about a nice Iced ice, or a glazed rock? 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: nah.....my teeth r kinda sensitive 2-day...hmmm....what else u got? 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: how bout a "cheese cake"? 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: hmmm.....nah i'll just have a crap-a-la-mode to go..... 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey doke! *throws a pile of crap in a bag and tosses it to you* Come again soon! 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: sure will! *takes back* wait this isn't ur crap...is it? 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... it's Bob's 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: oh ok....well u no wut i changed my mind...*gives back bag* 2004-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: if you insist... *eats it* don't forget to advertise Bob's Diner in yer description! or mood... 2004-09-28 [sara(:]: ok... 2004-09-29 [Rolo]: no offence but you need to do more with this wiki. draw pictures of sick dished you serve or have a competition for the best dish drawing *dish as in dish of food* that would be cool 2004-09-29 [Angelic nightmares]: *agrees with Rolo* Yeah it would.....aint really much happening at this Wiki anyways.....kinda boring to be honest. It needs some excitement. 2004-09-29 [PixieStickChick]: hmm....I'm not too good at drawing, but I'll see what I can do 2004-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey doke... 2004-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob Drawing Contest- here ya go! 2004-09-29 [sara(:]: *walks in* hello everyone! 2004-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: welcome! todays special is... ROADKILL OPOSSUM! get it now before the buzzards take care of it! 2004-09-29 [sara(:]: *looks @ dustin* right....*turns back around* so like i was saying...hello everyone!....besides naked boy over there.... 2004-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's casual wednesday! 2004-09-29 [sara(:]: *doesn't look @ u* riiiiight.... 2004-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: tommarow is casual thursday! then casual friday, saturday, sunday, monday, and tuesday! 2004-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob Drawing Contest 2004-09-29 [sara(:]: hmmmm...i see......*thinks about it* 2004-09-30 [there's a bluebird in my heart]: wheee I joined...and I'm on the menu. wheeee 2004-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: welcome! todays special is... ROADKILL OPOSSUM! get it now before the buzzards take care of it! 2004-09-30 [there's a bluebird in my heart]: lol mmmmm sounds ummy 2004-09-30 [Rolo]: i've drawn 'brainfood' but it was done on paint so i'm gonna draw 'n' scan so it'll be done at some point this weekend :) lucky people you 2004-09-30 [sara(:]: *strolls in and sits down* hello everyone! 2004-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: new badge! yay! 2004-09-30 [sara(:]: good for u dustin... 2004-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Todays special is... HAMBURGERS! get em' now before the rats do... 2004-09-30 [sara(:]: thanx....but no thanx..... 2004-10-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: holy crap! nice tacos! 2004-10-01 [lucky7dude]: hi 2004-10-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: howdy... 2004-10-01 [swabloo]: i made a banner! like it? i also put it on the drawing contest... 2004-10-02 [punkin22]: dustin....... i worry bout you 2004-10-02 [punkin22]: anyways hey everyone................... 2004-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: HI THERE!!! ya worry bout me, eh? 2004-10-02 [punkin22]: yeah very much................................ 2004-10-02 [punkin22]: the reason i worry is cuz 1 day u'll end up not hurting urself then i'll have 2 keep puting up with you 2004-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: LETS SEE YOUR WIKI!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! THAT'S WHAT I THOUGHT!!! NO WIKI!!! *walks off* 2004-10-02 [punkin22]: i don't want one *smacks u* 2004-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: jeleous are we? 2004-10-02 [Kanza]: hey all...*syands in the middle of the fight* whoops! *moves out of the fight!* i get this now! 2004-10-03 [PixieStickChick]: Hey everyone! Miss me?? Say yes or I'll spit in your food...Wait, I do that anyways....Nevermind 2004-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: howdy there! 2004-10-03 [Sir Soapy]: there's no "special picture" for thursday... 2004-10-04 [sara(:]: all of u r very crazy.....especially that pumpkin over there.....mwahahahaha!! 2004-10-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... pumpkin pie... 2004-10-04 [PixieStickChick]: yes there is 2004-10-04 [sara(:]: dustin...*has a worried look* ur not thinking of eating heather r u? 2004-10-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! new dessert! 2004-10-04 [punkin22]: hey i saw that sara!!! 2004-10-04 [punkin22]: and you can't eat me for dessert Dustin!!! 2004-10-04 [sara(:]: WHAT?! i don't no what u r talking about*looks around room* 2004-10-04 [punkin22]: sure u don't just wait till 2-morrow on da bus!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!oh ur dead 2004-10-04 [sara(:]: who me? what did i do?*pokes u then runs* tee-hee! 2004-10-05 [You deserve each tear that falls.]: uh, how did i get here? *looks confused* I am not hungry. :( haha, that's funny.....peace pplz 2004-10-05 [sara(:]: peace! 2004-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... peace? YEAH RIGHT!!! *tackles moon_fire* 2004-10-05 [sara(:]: ahhh! *pokes dustin* 2004-10-05 [deletethme]: this is bit off the wall cooky but nice 2004-10-06 [punkin22]: sara guess what? 2004-10-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in in a trinch- [i'll take the Hot salty goblet of blood hold the salt please] 2004-10-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey doke! anything else? 2004-10-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: I gotta hire someone to change the special everyday... 2004-10-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she noddes- [anything that (wine wise) dates back to 13000] 2004-10-07 [sara(:]: what heather? 2004-10-08 [swabloo]: *cackle* ah, white wolf singing heaven's song, that goblet of blood...well, the new stacks just come in today! *holds out order form* the owner of this joint has to sign here to get 100 goblets of hot salty blood! oh, and please don't ask where i got the, ah, vintage. 2004-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *signs* hmm... maybe I should have read that before signing... 2004-10-08 [swabloo]: *grin* yeah, maybe you should have... i haven't read it myself, either! 2004-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... i'll hire someone to read it to me... i'm too tired... 2004-10-08 [sara(:]: hmm... 2004-10-08 [dark starlight]: lol dustin what have you been doing to be tired? 2004-10-08 [swabloo]: *yawn* i'm tired, but i will NOT go to bed. 2004-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: DEATH TO BED!!! *shoots the bed with a bazooka* woops, that cost a lot of money... 2004-10-08 [sara(:]: jamie...u don't want 2 no that..... 2004-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: if you do, I have a video www.whydustinwastired.com 2004-10-08 [swabloo]: noooooooooooooooooooo don't kill the bed! the bed is soft and warm and comfy and is my only sanctuary of peace at the end of the day... 2004-10-08 [sara(:]: hmmm....it wouldn't hurt..... 2004-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: WIKI POLL!!! NOW TAKE IT!!! 2004-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh sure! vote against mine why don't you?! 2004-10-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she rolls her eyes- [ok then just get me something that is very blood and i'll drink it] -puts down her hat and trench- 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: Well, the uncooked ham is quite bloody (and still living) 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: If you can catch it... 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: All you gotta do is show it some cheese and it'll come right to ya 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... cheese... 2004-10-09 [dark starlight]: lol what kind of cheese? 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: some Autumn "Cheese" 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: har har!!! 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok then... 2004-10-09 [_Ni_]: HELLO!... hummm... what should i eat today...? 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: how about a nice menu? or a spork! 2004-10-09 [_Ni_]: hummm... the menu! the menu!! 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey doke! (it's the tastiest thing we have!) 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: do you know how long it took to underline all those numbers and make them bold up there?!!! 2004-10-09 [Angelic nightmares]: Can I get anything with Blood in it please 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: The only bloody thing we have at the moment is the uncooked ham 2004-10-09 [Angelic nightmares]: oh ok........I guess I'll have that then 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: *takes out a piece of cheese and watches the pig come running* Good piggy! *pulls out her butcher knife and cuts his head off then puts him on a platter and hands it to you* Here ya go 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: would you like a salty goblet of blood to go with that? 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: I thought we didn't have any of those..?? 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: we got a new batch... 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: Oh...I didn't know that...*feels stupid* 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't feel bad *hands you a glazed rock* 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: Ohh! Yumm-O! *bites into rock* 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: you might need these... *hands you some dentures* 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: Oh that's ok *gives you back the rock* I have to go an appointment at the dentist now 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Diner Motto: Get it now! Before it gets you... 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: hey that's a cool motto! have we always had it? 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... I'm putting some mottos on the joining page... 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: oh cool! 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: make up some an' add em'! 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... this wiki is getting too big... 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, and who voted against my badge?! 2004-10-09 [Evil-Genious]: um dat would be me 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mumbles* 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: How come you didn't put the poll on another page? 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: I don' no... 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: half the people here are too stupid to know how to click another link... 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: Oh....you mean the n00bs? lol 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey... iv'e been called a n00b recently... I guess i'm their king! 2004-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: that gives me an idea... 2004-10-09 [PixieStickChick]: poor little n00bs 2004-10-10 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: can I join :D 2004-10-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yah! 2004-10-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits on a bar stool* Can I have some thing with Blood in it? And please not the raw ham......... 2004-10-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure... yo chef! find me a plump rat will you?! 2004-10-10 [Angelic nightmares]: rat? Dont you have any human blood? 2004-10-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh sure... yo chef! cancel that! bring me a waiter insted! 2004-10-10 [Angelic nightmares]: thanks..........only problem being a vampire.....the craving for blood 2004-10-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... pixiestickchick...? IT'S SUNDAY!!! 2004-10-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Can I just get the Hot salty goblet of blood 2004-10-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure... 2004-10-11 [PixieStickChick]: Sorry! But I don't think anyone noticed that 2004-10-11 [sara(:]: i feel sorry for the n00bs if ur their king dustin.... 2004-10-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits and waits for her drink* .......hum hum hum.....doo dooo deee deee 2004-10-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: No Humming! *throws you your drink* ya gotta looovvveee the service here! :-) 2004-10-11 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: can I have a plate of human brain served the same way as in 'silence of the lambs' 2004-10-11 [Sir Soapy]: we gots one o' those back he-uh in da bathroom... 2004-10-11 [sara(:]: no humming huh? *starts humming* 2004-10-11 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: hmm...fresh brains *drools* 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a glazed rock at moon_fire* 2004-10-12 [Angelic nightmares]: Thanks *slowly sipis the drink* oooo thats goooood 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: new badge!!! 2004-10-12 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: hehe... cool badge :D 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: *hits her in the head* HEY!! that hurt!!!!!*sits down with her nees drawn close and starts pouting* ur a meany dustin! 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: it's not funny!! 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he... darn those false Bob's Diners! 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: quit laughing*throws a giant rock and it's dustin in the head* 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ouch! hey, this rock could go on the menu... 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: *throws a whole buch of rocks at dustin* 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... rocks... *eats them all* coulda used some catsup... 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: *throws a bottle of catsup @ him* 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kicks it back* 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: HEY! u said u wanted catsup...so take it! *hurls it and it hits dustin in the head* 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *opens the bottle and sprays you with it* 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: ahhhhhhh!!!!!!!dustin! i will KILL you!!!!!! *takles dustin* 2004-10-12 [Willy Witch]: hello 2004-10-12 [sara(:]: *jumps off dustin and dusts herself off* hello...*whispers 2 dustin* i'll deal wit u later 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: HOWDY!!! JOIN BOB'S DINER!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: this is the garfield comic made the same day as Bob's Diner was... 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: this is the one from the day I became a member of elftown... 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: the day I was born... 2004-10-12 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: lol... cute :D 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yeah... 2004-10-12 [PixieStickChick]: *gasp* OMG! It's Dana's alter-ego!! 2004-10-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think this is my "q" to back out slowly... *backs out of the room* 2004-10-12 [Sir Soapy]: just don't back into the bathroom... 2004-10-12 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: aaah!... it be PixieStickChick!!... oh wait, I ment to say... yay! :D and mwahaha... 2004-10-13 [PixieStickChick]: What's wrong with the bathroom?? Is that were the food comes from? (it wouldn't surprise me) 2004-10-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in and looks around- anyone left alive?? 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: *checks her non existing pols*... um... no 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: after eating here, I'm not suprised 2004-10-13 [sara(:]: *walks in*......*backs away slowly* 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: GET BACK HERE!!! *grabs you with a giant candy cane* 2004-10-13 [sara(:]: ahhhh!!!!*groans* DUSTIN! 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: yyyyyyyeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeessssssssssss? 2004-10-13 [Sir Soapy]: time to put the most disgusting drink yet... 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... 2004-10-13 [sara(:]: *kicks dustin in the face* 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *giggles* 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: only 7 people have Bob's Diner advertised in their houses! 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: come on people! I know where you live! 2004-10-13 [swabloo]: actually, i don't advertise my wiki's in my house. i advertise them in swabloo's wiki 2004-10-13 [Angelic nightmares]: I put a badge thingy in my house......can I get a bloody drink now? 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: I got the badge :D ...can I modify the background colour so it matches my house? 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: k, should I also post it here incase somebody else wants the same background colour? 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's still not the exact same as the backround of the houses... 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: isn't it? wait a sec 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: looks normal in my house.... take a look, it's kinda at the bottom of the page 2004-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: that poll ends when every member of Bob's Diner takes it... or until mine gets more votes than [swabloo]'s... 2004-10-13 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: well it's not really fair on you though is it... the other things have been up longer and your new one only like one or two days now 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: sooo? I only put that one up to take votes away from [swabloo]'s... SO I CAN WIN!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! 2004-10-14 [Angelic nightmares]: You really don't want to loose do you? 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... 2004-10-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *hands you a 20* can I get a Hot salty goblet of blood? By the way....you can keep the change 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: OOOOOOOHHHHHHHHH YYYYYEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!! sure... 2004-10-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles* 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in- [you know me anything bloody please] 2004-10-14 [PixieStickChick]: I put all my banners in my diary, but now it's in my house too 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she looks around and holds up a 50- [ok i realy would like something to eat here please] 2004-10-14 [swabloo]: ya know, garfield, you're a sore loser... just becouse MY banner is winning... -_-; 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she slams the 50 down and yells- [OK SO IS THERE ANYONE HERE THAT CAN GIVE ME SOMETHING TO EAT OR I'LL JUST GO TO A *&^%&*&^ BAR!!!!!!!!!] 2004-10-14 [sara(:]: *walks in* hello everybody! 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she walks out the door- [ok i understand ask someone to come and then just feed them to the wolves i see how it is!!!!] 2004-10-14 [sara(:]: oooookkkkk....did i miss something? 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think I did too... 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: GET BACK HERE!!! *throws a sack of dead lizards at white wolf* 2004-10-14 [swabloo]: me too.... 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't forget to eat at the other 3 Bob's Diners! 2004-10-14 [swabloo]: ¬¬ 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: you heard me... now march! 2004-10-14 [swabloo]: *carries on reading arcana withought paying attention* 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm changing the name of the place where people join; You got served! At Bob's Diner that is!... any suggestions? 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Anything except "The Crack Shack" 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she catches them and swallows- [thank you i'm sorry for my yelling i'm a little on eage sorry] -bows to them all and walks back in hadding garfield the 50- [keep the change] 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... moolah... 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she grins and bows once more- [i'll be back later] 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I think I will call it the crack shack... 2004-10-14 [sara(:]: oookkkkk...now i know i missed something... 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup, a brain... 2004-10-14 [Sir Soapy]: and now it's on the menu... 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks back in- [hello all how are things] 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR!!! It's Bob's Diner... how do you think things are? 2004-10-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: [only being polite] -hands her a 10- [the thicks blood drink you have and bloody rocks] 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 8 people have Bob's Diner advertised in their houses now... 2004-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: HEY!!! YOU PEOPLE!!! YEAH YOU, THE ONES READING THIS!!! MAKE SOME BADGES FOR THE POLL SO I CAN STOP SUBMITING STUPID STUFF!!! 2004-10-14 [swabloo]: i am advertising this in swabloo's wiki 2004-10-14 [jumpy little pixie]: ILL JOIN ILL JOIN!!!! *JUmps around* 2004-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ya better... 2004-10-15 [swabloo]: yeah, you would jump... 2004-10-15 [sara(:]: i sooooo do have a brain dustin!! i just don't use it very much that's all.... 2004-10-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *goes and sits at my usual bar stool* Hey garfield? Can I get a hot salty goblet of blood? 2004-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sits down next to ronald- [make it two] 2004-10-15 [PixieStickChick]: *walks over to ronald and white and hands then 2 hot salty goblets of blood* 2004-10-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *pulls out a 20* come on Garfield I know you like taking money from me. White Wolf....its on me. 2004-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -noddes and swizzes the drink- [i owe ya one if need be] 2004-10-15 [Angelic nightmares]: Don't worry about it *slowly sips the drink* 2004-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -slams the cup down and coughs- 2004-10-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *pats white wolf on the back* You ok? 2004-10-15 [PixieStickChick]: *sits back eating roasted n00b* 2004-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -noddes and grins her teeth red- [ya just drank it a little fast] 2004-10-15 [Angelic nightmares]: oh......gotta be careful with that stuff....*thinks* hmm I wonder why its for Vampires only....... 2004-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grins wider and licks her teeth- [i think it's the raw blood that makes it vamp onlys] 2004-10-15 [Angelic nightmares]: oh.....what about a 1/2 vamp 1/2 witch...........like me? I mean I drink it all the time, and its doesn't affect me...in a bad way I mean 2004-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she noddes- [ya i know i'm a wolf for crying out loud] 2004-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: we need more bloody products... 2004-10-15 [PixieStickChick]: we can serve fresh n00b 2004-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... with crutons! 2004-10-15 [PixieStickChick]: not unless you have special crutons made of blood... 2004-10-15 [Shaggy13]: I think I know how you can make bloody crutons. 2004-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: do ya now? 2004-10-15 [PixieStickChick]: dried blood?? 2004-10-16 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -shakes her head- [nope ya make them with the blood of a cow........mostly it's made just like one that is glazed only with blood ya know?] 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh, pixiestickchick? I believe you mean "blood" 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: Oh shit! I didn't even notice that! 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: so I noticed... 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *has an idea* watch out! 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: you also forgot to put a price on #25 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: Fuck! *goes off to change it again!* 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: there! it has a damn price!! 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: you seem happy... 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: i'm thrilled 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: aren't we all... 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: oh yes *rolls eyes* 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... eyes... 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: we have a new staff member... 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: how come I've never seen [spitfire_35121] or [Bringer of Nightmares]??? 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: they go to my school 2004-10-16 [PixieStickChick]: oh, I knew that 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: they don't get on much... 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *has another idea* 2004-10-16 [JJLS]: yummy!!!!!!!!!! 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: define "yummy" 2004-10-16 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sits down agin and looks around then up at the special- [don't ya think you may need to change it it has been the same for 2 days now ya know?] 2004-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah yeah... I need someone to do that for me... 2004-10-16 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -rubs her hands together- [may it be something blood that i can eat or drink oh plllllleeeeeaaaaaaassssseeeeeeee!!!!!] 2004-10-17 [jumpy little pixie]: im cold 2004-10-17 [Evil-Genious]: yes yes yes blooooooooooooood i love blooooooood 2004-10-17 [Evil-Genious]: shes right u now garfield we need more blood 2004-10-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -noddes and shifts into her wolf form rolling on her back begging- [oh pleassssseeeee oh please oh please oh please!!!] 2004-10-17 [jumpy little pixie]: blood 2004-10-17 [sara(:]: *walks in* hello everybody! *looks @ white wolf* ooookkkk....gonna pretend like i didn't c that... 2004-10-17 [sara(:]: *looks @ the menu* HEY!!! WHO PUT MY BRAIN ON THE MENU???!!!! AND MY BRAIN IS NOT VERY LITTLE!!! at least i don't think it is..... 2004-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: there, more bloody products 2004-10-17 [sara(:]: that still doesn't explain my brain being on the menu!!!!!!! 2004-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: It looked at me, so I put it up there... 2004-10-17 [sara(:]: how can it look @ u when it's on my head?!!! take my brain off the menu or u won't b having one urself! 2004-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: who says I have one anyways? WAS IT BOB?! *kills Bob* 2004-10-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -gets up and walks back to the bar- 2004-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: welcome to Bob's bloody Diner! 2004-10-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grins and noddes- [i like the sound of that] 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: blah 2004-10-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches and slowly sips her bloody drink* 2004-10-18 [sara(:]: *groans* ur beyond help dustin...... 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh hush, why don't you go ride the pharaoh? 2004-10-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *chokes on her drink* 2004-10-18 [sara(:]: WHAT?!!!!!! i will kill you Naked Lad!!! i will kill you!!!!! 2004-10-18 [swabloo]: heya, garfield.... *licks lips* i'm skint... no money... but, your neck is SO wonderfully curved... you wouldn't mind if i had a closer look, did you-? 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *backs away* have a pint of blood... on the house... or on the diner, whatever... 2004-10-18 [swabloo]: i'm the one that supplies the hot salty goblet of blood... but... *sly grin* i prefer it fresh... 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I just realized the leg of lamb up there ^ is actually a chicken leg... o_O 2004-10-18 [sara(:]: do it swabloo! do it! u'll do me a favor by doing so 2004-10-18 [swabloo]: *reveals fangs* vaaa! *jumps on garfiels, eyes ablaze* YOUR MINE!!! 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... don't worry, our blood's fresher than it was the day we got it! 2004-10-18 [swabloo]: *pinning garfield down* any vampires here? here's a free meal! 2004-10-18 [sara(:]: *starts laughing* i told u dustin! one way or another...u would die! *laughs evilly* 2004-10-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *licks her lips* I've always wanted to do this......*bites garfield hard on the neck* 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah, go ahead... I got eight lives left anyways... *bites you* 2004-10-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *gets chills* I wouldn't do that if I were you.....getting bit turns me on! 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Bob comes crashing in* Bob: WHAT'S GOIN ON IN HERE?! Me: look! a free meal! go get bob! 2004-10-18 [swabloo]: aaaargh!!!!! my finger!!!!! 2004-10-18 [PixieStickChick]: *looks around* I'm not even going to ask *sits back and watches* 2004-10-18 [Bringer of Nightmares]: soo i ...am gonna leave now! 2004-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: never! HAR HAR HAR!!! *grabs [Bringer of Nightmares]* 2004-10-18 [PixieStickChick]: hey look it's the cashier! *waves* 2004-10-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *back away slowly and mumbles "I'll just have the hot salty goblet of blood"* 2004-10-18 [PixieStickChick]: *hands ron a goblet of hot salty blood* 2004-10-19 [swabloo]: me too... 2004-10-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *takes the drink and slowly drinks it* ahhhh that hit the spot..... 2004-10-19 [PixieStickChick]: Sorry swabloo, we ran out...But garfields neck is available! ^_^ 2004-10-19 [swabloo]: ¬¬;; no, thanx, i just remembered summat.... Cat blood is poisonous to vampires!!!! waaa!!!! 2004-10-19 [PixieStickChick]: *backs away slowly* Human blood is bad for you too...right? *nervous giggle* 2004-10-19 [swabloo]: uh, no.... but your a pixie, right? *points at name* i'm not sure if pixie blood is good for me... 2004-10-19 [PixieStickChick]: no... pixie sticks are candy...sugar, flavor, and food coloring...I'm human not candy 2004-10-19 [swabloo]: yum... *drool* candy... oh, wait! i got some upstairs! *abandons computer to find tastey suger* 2004-10-19 [PixieStickChick]: I keep all my candy hidden or else my brother would eat it 2004-10-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I hide mine in my belly 2004-10-19 [swabloo]: i'm selling loads of candy at skool... but i can still have some for mua!!!!!!!!!! 2004-10-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... there's no candy on the menu.... 2004-10-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks around and sits down at her normal table- 2004-10-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: watch out... there's termites in that table... o_0 2004-10-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles as they run away and into the bar next door- [you where saying?] 2004-10-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hears the screams next door as someone is eaten alive by the carniverous termites* 2004-10-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -smiles wider- [oh look that sounds like dinner] 2004-10-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: ick... 2004-10-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: another badge... someone stop me! 2004-10-20 [PixieStickChick]: haha! I like that one!! *goes to change vote* 2004-10-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *grabs garfield by the shoulders* Stop with the badges! Swaboo's already winning! STOP IT NOW BEFORE I BITE YOU!!!!! I haven't had time to feed yet, so I'm VERY VERY hungry!! 2004-10-20 [PixieStickChick]: I can stop garfield, it's easy 2004-10-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, if you people would make some badges... 2004-10-20 [PixieStickChick]: but swabloo's already winning 2004-10-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: yaeh I know, but I'm going to put the top three in another poll 2004-10-20 [PixieStickChick]: oh goodie then I'm going to make one 2004-10-20 [sara(:]: *walks in* 2004-10-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: close that door, before you let the food out! 2004-10-20 [sara(:]: *looks @ dustin hatefully and slams the door shut* 2004-10-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh no!!! YOU SLAMMED IT ON BOB!!! poor Bob... 2004-10-20 [sara(:]: *looks @ bob* he shouldn't have been in the way of the door.....*walks to a table and sits down* 2004-10-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm a day behind on the "special of the day" 2004-10-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Words of wisdom: even a stopped clock is right twice a day! 2004-10-21 [PixieStickChick]: HA! Look how special!! 2004-10-21 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: lol xD it's great! 2004-10-21 [PixieStickChick]: hehe thanks, now if garfield would add it to the poll ^_^ 2004-10-21 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: yeah ... poll it :D 2004-10-21 [PixieStickChick]: I don't know how to add it o.O 2004-10-21 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: I guess garfiels is the only one that can put it up or something :s oh well... just keep bugging him untill he puts it up ;) 2004-10-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok ok!!! it's up der... 2004-10-22 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: lol yay :D 2004-10-23 [PixieStickChick]: yay! thanks! *whispers:"ass"* hehe, jk 2004-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: w... w... what?!!! 2004-10-23 [PixieStickChick]: *looks around* what??? 2004-10-23 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: I didn't hear anything... did you hear anything PixieStickChick? ;) 2004-10-24 [PixieStickChick]: Nope me no hear nothin 2004-10-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch twitch* 2004-10-24 [PixieStickChick]: *cries* me losing 2004-10-26 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: i voted for you :) 2004-10-26 [PixieStickChick]: Yay! *glomps deadly* 2004-10-26 [PixieStickChick]: how long is this contest going to last? 2004-10-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Till' new years... 2004-10-26 [sara(:]: hey dustin...ur a little behind on the specials...don't ya think? 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: I'd say 2004-10-27 [PixieStickChick]: happy now? 2004-10-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm lazy... you should see the other three diners! 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: today is my birthday *hums the tune to herself* 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *hugs [sara(:]* Happy Birdays!! 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: *hugs back* thanx! 2004-10-27 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: *starts singing* ...it's your birthday, you can do what you wanna.... 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: How old are you? 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: lol....14 2004-10-27 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: *gives you 14 cakes*... there ya go 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *chuckles* 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: CAKE! yay!!! 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *passes out [Hot Saltly Goblets of Blood]* 2004-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!!!!! 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: mmm....tastey!!! 2004-10-27 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: nice and hot... *takes another sip* 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: *looks @ nc-17* oookkkk...... 2004-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT!?!?*twitch*do you know who i am?! 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly sips her drink* Hey bob? This should cover the drinks *puts a 50 dollar bill in Bob's back pocket* 2004-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY!!!IDIOTS!!!!!LISTEN TO ME!!!!!!! 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: hmmmm.....hey wait a second!!!! i'm the only one who can twitch around here!!!*twitch* 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: i am no idiot!!! 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *glares at [Mortified Penguin]* I'm no idiot!! 2004-10-27 [sara(:]: hmph! *turns around the other way* 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *changes into a wolf and growls at [Mortified Penguin]* 2004-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *twitch,twitch*SCREW BOTH OF YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!BITCHES!!!!!!! 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *back away towards [sara(:]* 2004-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *twitch*HEY!!!come back here!!![moon_fire blows] ! 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *growls at [Mortified Penguin]* Leave her ALONE! 2004-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!!!!!!!! 2004-10-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *stays close to [sara(:]* 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: You have no idea... *shakes his head* JR.!!! GET BACK IN YOUR CAGE!!! 2004-10-28 [PixieStickChick]: *stares at [Mortified Penguin]* is he ok? 2004-10-28 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: lets poke him with a stick and see what happens.... *grabs a stick* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *does a dance* I WANT TACOS!!!! 2004-10-28 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: hmm.... tacos *drools* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: pokey pokey!!!! *prods nc-17 with vampire sharp nails* look! it twitches! *pokes again* teehee! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *changes into a wolf* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: aaw, purdiful wolfie!!! *pats wolf gently* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to [swabloo]* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: did ya know that vampires are related to wolves? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah........I'm part Witch, part Vampire, part Wolfie 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: kewl... *pat* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *licks her hand* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: eeeew, wolf saliva! *wipes hand on grass* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks away* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: nooooo don't leave!! i.... i have cookies! 2004-10-28 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: use a doggie whistle to call the wolfie back... 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: no, thankyou...i have super sharp hearing, and those whistles hurt my ears! 2004-10-28 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: lol... um, lure her back with some warm fresh brains... 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: if she did want to come back, she'd be eating the coockies i have now.... *in my head!* 2004-10-28 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: hehe, oh well, she'll be back ;) 2004-10-28 [Kanza]: hey all, this is my friend [blackenedrose*] she is a wolfie as well..have fun wolfie coz i gotta do sum stuff 2004-10-28 [PixieStickChick]: oh darn! I didn't get to poke [Mortified Penguin] *sits on her chair and pouts* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks up to [PixieStickChick] and licks her hand* 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Mortified Penguin] is [Sir Soapy]... HE FORGOT HIS FRIGGIN PASSWORD!!! 2004-10-28 [sara(:]: ha ha!!! and trust me......you don't wanna poke that thing....you might lose your finger.... 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: thats sad.....Garfied.....todays special aint burgers.....or did you not get the chance to steal the tacos??? 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: be right back... gotta go loot taco bell... 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: YAY!!! *does a dance* Tacos!!!! *Screams after Garfield* I WANT TACOS!!!!! 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: EEEEEK!!! what do you think we are?! some kind of restuaran- oh wait, we are! *throws a taco at your head* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: THANK YOU!!!!! *kisses garfields cheek* HEY YOU FORGOT THE SOUR CREAM!!!!!!!! 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *rolls eyes* not you again 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: WHERES MY SOUR CREAM?!?!?! 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: screw you,hooker!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: hooker? oh, i geddit! you mean to say that she keeps up coats on the walls? *trying to make homework simplified and easy* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: noooooooo i mean,a prostitute 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: yeah, i know... but it's hard to focus on anything, with all this bloody homework... 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: hmmmmmm....bloody,eh?your BRITISH!!!! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: I"M NOT A FUCKING HOOKER!!!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: vampire. 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: wolfie.....vamp....witch.....NOT A FUCKING HOOKER!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: I KNOW. 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: fuck this homework... 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: yes you are!!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: i'm not homework!!!!!!!!!! or am i? <<>> 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *shrugs* 2004-10-28 [sara(:]: shut up lardo!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: WHERES THE LARDO MAN??????????? he always has icecream!!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: i don't suffer from insanity. i enjoy every minute of it. 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: why don't we talk about happy things, like... like the splattered blood on the wall? (oOps!) 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: i'm bored.......where's friggin' garfield?! 2004-10-28 [sara(:]: lardo is nc-17....i no him from school.....unfortunately.... 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: Whos Lardo??? 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: where's the icecream? the blue elephant hasn't shown in 2 months, that is the sign of less chocolate but more money... 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: the brown thing jumped. 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: sara,step a little bit closer...*grabs a knife from bob* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *chews knife* *knife brakes* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: LESS CHOCOLATE!!!! *goes insane and runs into a wall* OUCH that hurt!! *rubs my head* I think I'll just lay here 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Mortified Penguin]? GET IN YER CAGE BEFORE I BREAK YOUR LEGS!!! *kicks him in a cat carrier* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: s'up hos?!?! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: do you see the blue elephant yet? it's standing around...... all around..... everywhere...... 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *rolls on the floor laughing* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: it's looking at me... 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: with yellow eyes... 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: sara's a hooker!!!! 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... do not fear! *grabs blue elephant and puts him on the menu* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: and.... and.... OH GOD IT STOLE MY MONKEY NUTS!!!!!!! GIVE THOSE BACK MISTER ELEPHANT!!!!!!!!! 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!! 2004-10-28 [sara(:]: ummm....*starts backing away slowly* *laughs nervously* only kidding..... 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: not to social are ya Jr? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly gets up but falls back down from laughing to hard* 2004-10-28 [sara(:]: AM NOT!!!! JR IS A HOMOSEXUAL!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: i got the peanuts back! anybody want one? 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: uh.....[swabloo],why'd you swallow bob's knife?? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: ummmmmm nope thanks 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: becouse it was tastey. 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... knife... HEY EL BLOB!!! I'M OVER HERE!!! 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: yo,everybody!sara's a lesbo!!!! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: blood??? HEY BOB?!?!?!? can I get the usual? ([Hot Salty goblet of blood]) I got money.....*waves around a 20* 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches Bob spit in the goblet* here ya go! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: my Monkey nuts are now for sale!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *spits in goblet* for added flavour XD 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: blood is out dude... 2004-10-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: g2g bye! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at the goblet* Thanks.....I think *drinks it anyways* Hey keep em comin....I'm loaded with money tonight!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *milks turkey* this is fun! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *chuckles* Booob? Bob not boob 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: bored and eating nuts..... keep talking, it's the only thing i'm doing! 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: [swabloo]...you,my friend,are a PSYCHO!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: thankyou for noticing. 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches [swabloo]* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: hey, i'm your friend? wooot! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *watches Ron* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: stareing contest?? 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: sure. *stare* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: *walks up to [Ronald Weasly]and stabs his back reapedetly with another of bob's knifes* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *stares back* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *still staring* *takes out knifes and eates them* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ??????? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *continues to stare* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *smiles breifly at n-c17, showing fangs* *stare* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: [n-c17]........honey you can't kill whats already dead! 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: darn you,knife eater!!!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: ablas espanol? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *stares deeper into your eyes* 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: a little 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: *stare*twitche*stare* you a full vampire? 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ?!?!?! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: hey, ron, i said... you a full vampire? *stares* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: si,si hablo espanol... 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: i can cheat..... *opens curtain revealing sunlight* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ? 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: hola amigo! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: NOT FAIR!!!! I WAS KISSED BY MY MASTER!!! I HAD TO CLOSE MY EYES.......oh well *goes back to kissing my master* 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: i'm only a half vampire, so it doesn't affect me... lucky me =D 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: que?QUE?!?! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: si, yo hablo espanol 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: !!!?? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: Yes I'm a vamp 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: mierda! mierda! mierda! (i think that's how you spell shit in spannish) 2004-10-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in- [hey i'll have my normal] 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ?!tu no puedes hablar espanol!!! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: shit in german is........FUCK i can't remember 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: I speak spanish better than I write/read it 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: [White Wolf Singing Heaven's Song:] can't talk spanish!!! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: sheisse.... i think. yo puedo ablar espanol! yo tengo familia en espana! tu no puedes decir que yo no puedo ablar espanol! esto es espanol, no? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: huh??? 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: i can speak WAY better spannish that write... i'm bylingual in that language. 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: ayayayay! tengo una cosa en mi pie!!!! (pie- foot) 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: si...... 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: no... 2004-10-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: [sorry i didn't know i had to know spanish to drink here!!!] 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: loco! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: uh, no, you don't, but you DO have to shake hands wiv the ebil blue elephant... 2004-10-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: [no i'm not crazy] 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: neither did I 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: de verdad??? 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: imma not calling you crazy! i was stating that I am crazy. or insane, i'm not really piccy. 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: de verdad que? 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *hands white wolf a glass of [hot salty goblet of blood]* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ????????????? 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: lets all do the happy dance! *does the happy dance* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ...nada importante.... 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: I get so many of these........its a wonder I aint drunk yet 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ?! 2004-10-28 [swabloo]: can some1 go hyper on monkey nuts? *twich* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: hookers hookers hookers...... 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: /1 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: they could.......i mean you do 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: *falls out of seat* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: ?! 2004-10-28 [Angelic nightmares]: guess I'm going guys *follows my Master up stairs* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: i'm all alone!!!!!*CRIES* 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: geuss i'll just cry again..... 2004-10-28 [n-c17]: wanna fry iguana in tiajuana with yo mama on a llama dot comma??? 2004-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: i'll probably just order bob's mama. 2004-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: i'll probably just order bob's mama...all night long,baby!(now let's see here,all night equals 8 hours...i owe 8 bucks,bob!!!!!!) 2004-10-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: thats my rhyme!!! *punches [Mortified Penguin]* 2004-10-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: and it's, hey ya wanna fry iguana in tiajuana with yo mama on a llama whilst smokin marijuana? DOT COMMA!!! 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: okay...§.§ 2004-10-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -swops down from the rafters a little agetated- [ok now may a please have my normal drink........please!!!] -looks around and sits down at the bar- [....or just a shot will do ^^] 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: *takes out gun* okay! 2004-10-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she looks at the gun her eyes shine a clear red for a moment and the gun blows up in swabloo's hands- -she chuckles- [little fool.....you know that a shot is a drink dont' you?] 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: did i forget to mention something *turns into ice dragon* i'm up for adoption! 2004-10-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -smiles and shifts into her own snow dragon from- [i've all ready been adopted] 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: really? 2004-10-29 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: I've been adopted like 5 times or something :D I'm a female zombie scientist -> my drawings ,look here for the pic ;) 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: I've only been adopted twice 2004-10-29 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: I addopted you, your my purple monkey :D 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: i'm an ice dragon... you can adopt me at i'm up for adoption! i've already been adopted a few times, but i can still serve more masters! 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: I know! And I adopted you! *pets her pwetty zombie* 2004-10-29 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: lol... *glomps her purple monkey*... why are you purple? *scratches head* 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: you didn't adopt me.... dragons rool! 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: Honestly, I have an odd obsession with purple and monkeys...*shrugs* It's weird 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: Anybody know what a dragon eats? 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: hey... you can also look for what foxes eat, 'coz i can also change into a red fox.... uh, my bio in the adoption center has changed. but i still excpect dragon food! 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: I noticed the change, but what do fox's eat? 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: uh.... road kill? 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: there might be summat on the menu... 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: How about a bloody beaver? (that sounds so wrong! lol) 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: hey, look! at the bottom of the food menu! there is the answer! 2004-10-29 [PixieStickChick]: OMG the answer was so simple!! *runs off to make a full course meal for fox and dragon* 2004-10-29 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in and sits down with a sad expression on my face* 2004-10-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks around at the new people in the bar- 2004-10-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: blerg... 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: *changes into fox, licks rons hand* you okay? 2004-10-29 [sara(:]: *walks in* speaking of the menu......dustin....when is my brain coming off it??!!!! 2004-10-29 [swabloo]: 2004-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!!! 2004-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY!!!!!!bitches,answer me...... 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm ganna order bob's mama again....WHOA...she's rough tonight.... 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps bob's mama on the butt*OH YEAH!! 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: NNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2004-10-30 [PixieStickChick]: *raises and eyebrow and stares at nc-17* 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up,pixiestickdick?j/k!!!!s'up? 2004-10-30 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: uh.... right... :s 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up ho? 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: i said..S'UP HO!!!!!!!!!!! 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ? 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: hey,everybody,sara rousey(a.k.a.[sara(:])is awhore that wants a dildo for christmas!!!!!! 2004-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: THAT'S IT!!! YOU'RE GOIN ON THE MENU!!! 2004-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR!!! 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!?!*pimp slaps you and runs away...* 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: SCREW YOU HOOKER!!!HAR HAR!!!! 2004-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *strangles you* only... pimps... can... PIMPSLAP!!! *pimpslaps you* 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *pimp slaps you*exactly!!! 2004-10-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in handing garfield a $20- [my normal] 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: SCREW YOU,WHITEY!!!! 2004-10-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she punches nc across the room and growls her fangs growing long and her eyes black- [what did you say ass wip?!] 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *stands up and waves a doggy bone*i said......SCREW YOU WHITEY!!!HAR HAR!!!! 2004-10-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she jumps up and puts her hands around his neck pinning him up to the wall- -her teeth are just a few inches away from his neck- [you're not worth my time] -she toses him to the side and sits down at a table- 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *stands up again and gets one of bob's knives*DAMN YOU!!!!!TU MADRE!!!!! 2004-10-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -stays sitting- [put the knife down boy....] -she turns her dark eyes on him- [you're not man enogh to use it] 2004-10-30 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: right on whitey! :D 2004-10-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles as she turns back around- 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.... 2004-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm just going to sit down*sits by White Wolf guardian of snow and ice* 2004-10-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -smiles at his bravery- [you're one of the first to sit by me....i amend you] 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: pixiestickdick? hmm...it would be funny if I actually did change my name to that 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: amend me,eh?at your school,do you go to gifted class? 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: amend what?? 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ?silence fool,the adults are talking... 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: ... 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: heh,not very manly/womanly of you... 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: ... 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: wait ...aren't you homosexual? 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ... 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: no, I'm bisexual...there's a difference 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: oh....can bis go out with bis? 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: uh duh 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: oh ok.....r u a virgin 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: wtf kind of question is that? 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh..a good one... 2004-10-31 [PixieStickChick]: Why would you ask someone a question like that if you don't even know the person? 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ???????????????????????????? 2004-10-31 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: just insult him in japanese ;) then he shuts up 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: hey,punk!!! 2004-10-31 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: hi there, baka ka! <- japanese again 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: up yers,hooker.....you know i'm making alot of enemies today.... 2004-10-31 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: oooh, enemies... I'm sooo scared *mega sarcastic* ...Zakennayo 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals bob's cash register and hits you with it *TAKE THAT !!!!!!!! 2004-10-31 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: uh, yeah... to bad this aint real huh... ;) Tottoto dete ike 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: yeah,to bad....*keeps hitting you absent mindedly* 2004-10-31 [swabloo]: .... why do you guys squabble? 2004-10-31 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: I understand that the mentally ill must feel happy at all times, so you keep on pretending to play with your lill cash register... Do-demo ii-yo. 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: cause we feel like it,punk!!! got aproblem with it?!? 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: hey ....i'm not mentally ill.......or am i.?$_# 2004-10-31 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: um... yeah... well, I'm leaving now, I gotta halloween party to attend... have fun talking to yourself ^_^ 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: whee!!talk to myself,talk to myself!!!wait a minute..... 2004-10-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles at nc and sits down at the bar- 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: yo,bob,get whitey's usual....as for me,i'll take half a cracker....*sits by White Wolf guardian of snow and ice* 2004-10-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles- you know that you're risking a lot sitting by me.....i'm not one of the most popular people here....in town really] -smiles as she remembers the carnivores termites- 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: carniverous,eh? 2004-10-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she nods and points to the bar over- [ya they ran when they saw me and began eating the people in the next bar] 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....*orders another half a cracker* 2004-10-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she orders a shot of the thickest bood and chuges it- 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: bood,eh? 2004-10-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she nods- [ya i do...somewhat of a vampier] 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....*edges away...* 2004-10-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: yo,my bro says.."s'up?" 2004-10-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: tell this to yo bros... "STICKMAN IS COPYRIGHT YA LIL' NERD!!! IMMA HURT YOU!!! as for the rest o' you midgets... have a happy halloween! before I find out where you live..." 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....hey,D,go to kirsten's fanclub @wiki... 2004-10-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo, it's like this... {Kirsten's fanclub@wiki} but instead of "{ }" use this and the beggining and end "[ ]" 2004-10-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: like so... Kristens fanclub 2004-10-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... I don't see nuthin there... 2004-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: go there.. 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Diner is now under construction... 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: go to [kristen's fanclub]now... 2004-11-01 [Beautiful darkness]: hay 2004-11-01 [Accio]: Question... I would like to make a banner, how would I go about it? I mean after I make it would I just put it in here? Or would I send it to someone? Or would it have to be submitted in the poll to be voted upon by the very confused people who work/pass thorugh here? 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: just put it here, and I'll put it in the contest 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!!! 2004-11-01 [Accio]: k 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo, el blob! make a banner! 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... my badge is catching up to [swabloo]'s! 2004-11-01 [silvermoon dragon]: hey i want to be part of the staff garfield 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: omi god!it's chuck!!! 2004-11-01 [swabloo]: uh, i told you nc-17... it sounds better with 3 yo's! 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: no, 4 yos... wat ya wanna be chiz? 2004-11-01 [sara(:]: how stupid..... 2004-11-01 [Beautiful darkness]: what stupid???0.o 2004-11-01 [sara(:]: dustin......and jr..... 2004-11-01 [swabloo]: chiz? 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... chiz... 2004-11-01 [Beautiful darkness]: who iz swabloo iz that jr??? 2004-11-01 [sara(:]: uhhh i don't really no but i no nc-17 is jr. 2004-11-01 [Beautiful darkness]: oh okay!!! no-17 iz jr is he on?? 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: [swabloo] ain't jr... 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up my homies hookers?! 2004-11-01 [Beautiful darkness]: LOL YOUR R STUPID 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: right.....think what you will..... 2004-11-01 [sara(:]: at least she can think jr...... 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: like i said before.....UP YERS,HOOKER!!!!! 2004-11-01 [Beautiful darkness]: up your,hookers jr 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... blah? 2004-11-01 [sara(:]: ???? 2004-11-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she jumps on nc pinning him to the ground- [how meany bloodly times much we do this] 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in and sits down with a sad expression on my face* 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: you are expecting me to ask what's wrong, eh? WELL I WANT!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! hmm... what's wrong? 2004-11-01 [sara(:]: *laughs* 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: nuttin......I'll just have the usual 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: the usual? you mean the rude service and crappy food? coming right up! 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah.......that and a [hot saltly goblet of blood] 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a boiling goblet of blood at your eyes* 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *catches it* thanks...... 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's on the house... or diner... whatever they call this run down piece o' crap... 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* thanks garfiled.........ya sure Bob wont get mad? 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: bob? BOB?!who's bob? 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: .... 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ANSWER ME,FOOLS!!! 2004-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: fools... FOOLS SAYS THE DORK!!! get em' boys! *watches as wolverines eat you* 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *chuckles slightly* 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *being eaten*HAR HAR!!!I'M STILL ALIVE!!!!!*got gobbled up* 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes head* 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *is being digested*gurgle... 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly sips her drink* 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *in intestines*slop gurgle.. 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *licks the blood from the drink off her lips* 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *is crapped out *ick! 2004-11-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *takes another drink and watches* 2004-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!!! 2004-11-01 [Accio]: Hey, vote in my poll, please? 2004-11-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... yo, el blob! still on that science thing?! 2004-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: nope!finished! 2004-11-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: drats... what's that kirsten thing? spell it for me... 2004-11-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: hurry up and vote on that poll ^^ 2004-11-02 [Angelic nightmares]: ................ *wakes up* must have fallen asleep here.........Hey Garfield......what cha got breakfast wise? 2004-11-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she opens her eyes as she drops down from the rafters- [i must have as well....odd it's not like me to fall asleep during the night] 2004-11-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *hands white wolf guardian a [hot saltly goblet of blood]* 2004-11-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles as she tilts it up side down and drinks- 2004-11-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly sips the drink* 2004-11-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she puts the glass down with a sigh- [the people here really know me too well] 2004-11-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles* Surprised they dont know me......I'm almost always here.....spend more time here than I do an ywhere else 2004-11-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grins- [that is a little odd....well need to go so talk at cha later....by the way if nc-17 comes on....glomp him for me please!!!!!] 2004-11-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *nodds* will do 2004-11-02 [swabloo]: ur.. i just like glomping. i will too! 2004-11-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles- 2004-11-02 [swabloo]: *smiles back* 2004-11-02 [Beautiful darkness]: HAY POEPLE!!!!0.O DUSTIN HAY BABE LOL 2004-11-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pulls out machine gun* NO MISSPELLING IN HERE!!! *randomly fires* 2004-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out a 44. magnum*YEAH, NO MISSPELLING!!!!!*shoots darky's head* 2004-11-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: wel sayd... yaeh... know mispellin en heer! 2004-11-02 [sara(:]: *walks in* uhhh....*starts backing out slowly* 2004-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: tank yu,o grate idiut.... 2004-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: hey!look!it's soar throat girl!HI,SOAR THROAT GIRL!!!!! 2004-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm a big fan of your porn!!! 2004-11-02 [sara(:]: SHUT UUUUUPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*clears throat* sorry bout that..... 2004-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: hehe... 2004-11-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: "clears throat" he he 2004-11-02 [sara(:]: shut up!! oh and jr....u spelled soar wrong....asshole!!! 2004-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: woops!sorry,porn star! 2004-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food* 2004-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: fools,thats all ya'll are....... 2004-11-03 [swabloo]: NC-17!!!!!!!!! WEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!! *glomps nc-17* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: heya peeps 2004-11-03 [swabloo]: you hardly comment on this page... in fact, you have NEVER commented on this wiki! why now? 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: well I forgot that this place existed >><<>><< but when u came over and went on it, I remembered^^; 2004-11-03 [Beautiful darkness]: leave moon alone!!!!!!! yall is so evil!!!! 2004-11-03 [swabloo]: oh no! i've been found out!<<>> 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: lol 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in and sits at her usual table* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: hellllllllloooooooooooooooooo 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: Hey snow..........kinda quiet in here today....... 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: yeah >><<*watches a tumbleweed bounce across the room* 2004-11-03 [swabloo]: *sits in usual spot, next to fire* oy! bob! can i order..... uncooked ham? i like it raw, very raw, i enjoy the... ah... exersise... 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: lol *wouldn't toutch it* 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *chuckles* Nice to see you again Swabloo 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: ^^ 2004-11-03 [swabloo]: me too, but the mirror aint.... *sigh* i'm a frequent visitor... i'm an active member... i made a banner and will make lots more out of sheer bordem.... so.. yeah... i wanna be someone important here..... 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *changes into a white wolf with one black paw* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: who created this place?? 2004-11-03 [swabloo]: damn... i have to go now. well, by..... *upset look* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: bai swabby!!!!:( 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: Be right back.......gotta get something *runs off* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: o.o okies 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *runs back in* hi....i'm bbbbaaaaacccckkkkkk 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: hey!!wb!!!!! 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: :D 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *magicly gets some hot chocolate and slowly drinks it* want some snow? 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: :D yesh please! 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *takes another sip* ok one hot chocolate coming up *magicly makes a glass of hot chocolate appear in front of [Snowflame]* 2004-11-03 [sara(:]: bnut snow melts when it gets hot....won't u melt snowflame...lol 2004-11-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she drops down from the rafters landing on a stoll at the bar- [hello all] 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: *doesn't want to melt*o.o hey white, thanx ronald!! 2004-11-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she grins at snow- 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: no problem..............*makes snows coco not so hot* least now you wont melt 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: thanx^^; 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: its actually cold coco.......when when it touches your lips it has this warming sensation about it 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: ...........but it won't melt u? 2004-11-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she puts her hand on the bar- [hey ronald i'll take the bloodest drink in the house...] -puts 20 50s down- [you can count it] 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *magicly gets {white wolf} the bloodyest thing I can think off* There ya go......Blood from all over the world......has a bit of a sweet-tangy taste to it *picks up the money and slips it into my pocket* 2004-11-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles as she slowly drinks it a little bit runnig out the side of her mouth- 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *offers {white wolf} a napkin* 2004-11-03 [Snowflame]: ^^ 2004-11-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she puts the drink down and wips the blood up with her finger- [no thanks i'll not need it] 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: okie 2004-11-03 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello Ronni 2004-11-03 [Angelic nightmares]: Hi........welcome to my favorite wiki 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh yeah! BOB'S DINER IS ACTUALLY DECENT!!! I guess I'm not doin' my job... 2004-11-04 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello [Angelic nightmares] I loves you 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: AR! this be my wiki fer those of ye wunderin'... 2004-11-04 [Beo-Wulf]: hello [Sagacious Turkey] How are you? 2004-11-04 [Beo-Wulf]: [Sagacious Turkey] can I please get a [Hot salty goblet of blood] 2004-11-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Good luck with it......*hands [Beo-Wulf] a [hot saltly gobleet of blood]* BOB!!!! I WANNA JOB HERE!!!!!!! I COULD BE REALLY GOOD!!!!!!!! OH PLEASE???? *[wolf form] begs Bob for a Job* 2004-11-04 [Snowflame]: hehe 2004-11-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Please please please please please??????? I could be really good.............I promise!!! 2004-11-04 [Snowflame]: I bet u could!!! 2004-11-04 [Beo-Wulf]: Please let [Angelic nightmares] have a job here 2004-11-04 [Snowflame]: yeah!! 2004-11-04 [PixieStickChick]: like your job? 2004-11-04 [swabloo]: i wanna job here too!!!!!!!! please? i'll come up with lots and lots of good badge ideas??? 2004-11-04 [Snowflame]: :D 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: I gotta get someone to change the special of the day everyday... any volunteers?! 2004-11-04 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: swabloo & ronald weasley want jobs ;) 2004-11-04 [sara(:]: oh! i want a job dustin!!! 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: how bout straw cleaner?! HAR HAR HAR!!! sure... you can change the special everyday... 2004-11-04 [sara(:]: hmmmm....i want to b one of the waitressess....u have 2 have more than one!! 2004-11-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in- 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... no 2004-11-04 [sara(:]: yes!!!!!!! i don't want 2 change the special *pouts* 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... They're on Bob's Badges 2004-11-04 [PixieStickChick]: swabloo can be our publicist and moon fire can be our specials changer 2004-11-04 [PixieStickChick]: and if white wolf wants a job too, I have an idea in mind for hers 2004-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... put em' on the staff... I got to go 2004-11-04 [PixieStickChick]: I hope moon fire doesn't take offense to her job 2004-11-04 [sara(:]: actually.......i would say something but i must leave... 2004-11-04 [PixieStickChick]: oh well, you can just change it 2004-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-04 [PixieStickChick]: You can't eat that here!! 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: YES I CAN!!!!!!*pulls out machine gun* 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: *eats the machine gun*>>; 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....machine gun-eating flame,eh?niiiiiiiiiice........ 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: *nods head slowly*hehe^^; 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*.......I GOT WATER!!!I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT!!!! 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: *hisses* 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *hides in a corner*EEEEEEEEEEEEEK!!!!!!!!!!I'T HISSED!!!!!!!!!! 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: *growls loudly then laughs* 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: SCREW YOU HOOKER!!!HAR HAR!!!!*pimp slaps you* 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: jr... what did I tell you about harassing my customers...? THAT'S MY JOB!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! *pulls out machine gun* 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: *flicks nc's nose* :p 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm this close to killing both of you!!!!!*pulls out AK_47*£hehehe.... 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Alt+44444=£ 2004-11-05 [Accio]: å=alt + 145542 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: *meow*? 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: alt + 0134 = † 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: poo 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Will somebody please give [Angelic nightmares] A job here 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: I already did 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Thank you so much [PixieStickChick] She will be so happy 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: She should be happy! She could have ended up with moon fire's job! 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: That will be cool [PixieStickChick]...Oh by the way I am [Angelic nightmares]'s Boyfriend 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [PixieStickChick] If I wanted a job here what job would you give me? 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: I don't know, what kind of job would you want? btw, you can call me pixie, chef or steph 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: I am not really sure Pixie....I will have to think about that 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay Pixie...Seeing how [Angelic nightmares] Is a waitress...Can I please be the Waiter? 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: Ok, but only cause you and [Angelic nightmares] are special 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: How are we special? 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: well she's always here ordering hot salty goblets of blood and you I guess would be special by association ^_^ 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Yeah I know that [Angelic nightmares] Always ordering [hot salty goblets of blood]....Oh by chance may I please get a glass of [hot salty goblets of blood] 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: Sure! *hands you a [hot salty goblet of blood]* Enjoy! 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Thank you so much 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: Welcome ^_^ 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *dances all over the place* I GOT A JOB!!!! I GOTTA JOB!!!!!! I GOTTA JOB!!!! *stops dancing and grins* I got a job!!!! 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: *claps for ronald*:D hehe 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins even bigger* I feel so loved.....*puts a 20 in the cash box and gets herself a [hot saltly goblet of blood]* Want one Snow? 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: yash plez :D 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *hands snow a [hot satly goblet of blood]* 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: thanx^^uhh*pays* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *puts the money in the cash box* Hey all......I gots to go to school.....I should be at here (at work) about 4.......I LOVES YOU [Beo-Wulf]!!! MORE THAN YOU"LL EVER KNOW!!!!! 2004-11-05 [Snowflame]: baibai!! 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] When you get back to Bob's Diner May I please get a [hot satly goblet of blood] 2004-11-05 [swabloo]: urm.. what's a publicist? 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *hands [Beo-Wulf] a [hot saltly goblet of blood]* That will be one dollar please???? 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Gives [Angelic nightmares] $1.00 for a [hot saltly goblet of blood] 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey! darn [PixieStickChick]!!! only me, [spitfire_35121], and [Mortified Penguin] can give jobs! *mumbles about crazy people trying to kill him and take over his diner...* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *puts the money in the cash box* Hey Garfield 2004-11-05 [swabloo]: bwahahaha.......... garfield, i'm gonna make a badge that is the BEST!!!!!!! you will NOT compete with it!!!!!! 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: howdy 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: NEVER!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* the two of you is always competing with badges 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: we're tied... for now!!! 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: swabloo? swabloo who? har har...! 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits at my usual table and waits for a customer to wait on*......... 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] You can wait on me 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins and walks over to [Beo-Wulf]* What can I get ya? *sits in his lap* 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Well are you on the menu? 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: not yet...........*looks over at Garfield* 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... ick! save it for the diner next door... 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay Garfield please put [Angelic nightmares] On the menu 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* Hey Garfield....Please put me on the menu........any part of me.....dont matter 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: any part of you, eh...? *has a cruel laugh and gallops off* 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: *sticks her tongue out at garfiled and runs away giggling* 2004-11-05 [sara(:]: *walks in* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: I wanna know which PART OF ME IS ON THAT MENU!! 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a bloody beaver hide at chef steph* 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: loot an' see... 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *falls on the floor laughing* I was using that toe!!! 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: was... 2004-11-05 [sara(:]: *shakes her head* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: put a part of [Beo-Wulf] up there too 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Yeah please put me on the menu too 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: he might take your toe........keep a close eye on your toes 2004-11-05 [sara(:]: Speaking of the menu Dustin..........*looks over to Dustin* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *listens to the crickets chriping* 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... crickets! good idea! 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] catches crickets for garfield* here ya go 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches [Mortified Penguin]* 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *backs away*.....MY FOOD,MINE!!!!!!!!! 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: *watches [Angelic nightmares]* 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *sticks my tounge out at you* I dont eat shit anyways 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT THAT CHINESE FOOD?! *shoots some chinese children outside* HAR HAR!!! TAKE THAT!!! 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: heh......what do you call b.'s d. food then..... 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* human form is boring........*changes into wolf form* 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [Mortified Penguin] Leave [Angelic nightmares] Alone 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: Oohh!! A wolf!! Is that on the menu? 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [PixieStickChick] The Wolf is mine 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: noooooo *howls* 2004-11-05 [PixieStickChick]: I didn't mean THAT wolf, I meant A wolf ^_^ 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: oh alright 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps up in [Beo-Wulf]'s lap* Save me? *gives you "puppy dog eyes"* 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: I will save you [Angelic nightmares]....You are my wolfie 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *licks [Beo-Wulf] all over his face* 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Look at my wolfie she is being good 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps down and lays my head on your leg* 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: save it for Joe's Eatery next door!!! 2004-11-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly falls asleep* 2004-11-05 [sara(:]: lol.....dustin i want my brain off the menu!!! 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Go up to [Angelic nightmares] And lays next to her 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ..*eats more chinese food*....... 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: uh sara......YOU CRIED AT SCHOOL!!!!HAR HAR!!!!!! 2004-11-05 [sara(:]: SHUT UP JR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: HARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHARHAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2004-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: jr... every time you eat chinese food, I have to kill a chinese kid... *throws a grenade at a little kid* 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: who cares,they're chinese.... 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ..*eats more chinese food*....... 2004-11-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -swings down from the rafter landing next to nc- 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ..*eats more chinese food*....... 2004-11-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at him- [ok then] 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: hey!i've been eating chinese food for an hour now.... 2004-11-05 [swabloo]: yo............... and bye................... 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: swabloo?swabloo who?ehehe...... 2004-11-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles evily and jumps on nc's head- 2004-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: darn you!no parking on my head! 2004-11-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she sticks her fingers in his ears- 2004-11-06 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: give nc a 'wet willy'... (and I hope you know what that is or this could get perverted) 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: darn you!!! 2004-11-06 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: hehehe... *slightly evil laughter*... I'm sleepy, me go sleep now... buh bye 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: up yers!!! 2004-11-06 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: Nihongo hanaso.... Tsukareta. Nemui. Omoshirokunai. Ja mata-ne. translation:Let's talk in Japanese.... I'm tired. I'm sleepy. This is boring. See you later. 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: darn nihongo........ 2004-11-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -puts her tail in his mouth now in wolf form- 2004-11-06 [swabloo]: *ahem* Garfield, i have a badge for the poll! here it is: 2004-11-06 [Snowflame]: thats good Swabby^^ 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-06 [Snowflame]: lol 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY!are you making fun of my years-worth-of-chinese-food?!?! 2004-11-06 [Snowflame]: uhm of course not!!^^; 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: -_-..........i still got water......... 2004-11-06 [Snowflame]: >> 2004-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: º½-:::................^_________^ 2004-11-06 [Snowflame]: ^^ 2004-11-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she puts her tail in nc's ear and tickles him- 2004-11-06 [Snowflame]: heehee 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ORACION 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: and what exactly is this place 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: uh......a diner........sorta........ 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: oh 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: DON'T EAT THE FOOD!!It'S CONTAMINATED!!!!! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: i wasnt plaining on it... 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: good.....i'm the janitor...... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: alright 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: you can be............waitress! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: waitress?are you kiding 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, yes he is... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at cat- i hope so 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: if you think i would wear someting like that 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry... we have casual fridays... and mondays... and tuesdays... and- well you get the point! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: strange..... 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... what did you expect? not like we're some kind of restuarant! oh, wait... yeah we are! 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, and Bob's Diner is now associated with SCAA! (stupid crap association of america) 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -rolls her eyes- i kinda figured that out 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... eye rolls... good idea! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -walks over to the bar- anything good here? 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!! oh, were you serious? 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: uh yea... 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, no... hey fella! you haven't joined yet, have you?! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: fella?how about lady..and no i havent 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll call you an "it"... *starts chanting, "JOIN US... JOIN US..."* 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: fine... 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah... doncha feel better? 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: uh sure... 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... I'm bored... maybe I should start firing staff... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: um alright you do that ill just sit here 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: that seat has termites... o_0 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs- i cant believe this is a diner it has termites....-stands up-fine ill stand here 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: watch out... there's a floor gremlin... and yes, he is hungry... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: damn what is with your diner!?!?-her eyes glow blood red-let him try-her vampire fangs grow and she stabbs 2 dagger through her wrists- 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: whats that? oh ok, I'll tell her... the floor gremlin thinks you're hot... will you go out with him? If not, he's still hungry... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks down at her form-a floor gremlin thinks im hot....this could not get any more crazy.. 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: do not underestimate the weirdness of Bob... *watches the oven dwarf crawl out* 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at the dwarf-okay i take that back it is getting worse 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, and look! it's our little buddy, the toilet troll! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs- this just keeps getting better and better 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: lets ask the wall blob what he thinks...! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes return to thier norml bright blue and she summons a chair and sits down- fine then ask the wall.. 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: he says hi... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: hi....... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: and no i will not go out with the stupid gremlin tell him i am already taken 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches the gremlin search out whoever is going out with you* 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: good luck..... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -summons a rose- 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: ALL RIGHT!!! NEW BADGE!!! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: ............. 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: ......................... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: strange............... 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -shakes her head-so are they any creatures who dare to touch my husband?cause ill kill them if they lay one finger on him 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches a hand named chuck poke him* 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: good i take that as a no.no blood will be shed tonight 2004-11-07 [Rick-P]: So this is the place?*Looks at everything*Who wanted to hunt me down? 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: um well the floor gremlin did 2004-11-07 [Rick-P]: *Looks at the floor*O.o!This place is creepy. 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: yea dont sit on any of the chairs..termites 2004-11-07 [Rick-P]: .................stupid wiki...why is it a diner if everything is alive.......... 2004-11-07 [Beo-Wulf]: This wiki is not stupid....I work here....If you have a problum please take it up with the MANAGER: [Sagacious Turkey] 2004-11-07 [Rick-P]: T.T Well mister garfield's floor goblin wanted to kill me so he can have my wife!>< and that ticed me off!! 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in and her eyes widen- [riku i didn't know you came here] 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up whitey?!?! 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -glances at nc and walks over to where he's sitting- [nothing much hows about you nc?] 2004-11-07 [Snowflame]: <<>><<>><<>><<>><<>><<>> 2004-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: me?WELL..........*thinks deeply*.....ç•] 2004-11-07 [swabloo]: i have another banner! put it on the poll! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: this place is scarey 2004-11-07 [Snowflame]: yeah^^ 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: lol 2004-11-07 [Snowflame]: ^^ 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: me like me like 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: howdy whitey! which un' did ya vote fer? 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitches* every time [swabloo] makes a badge I have to make one to compete with it... 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: the one you made with garfield on it^^ 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: all right!!! 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have over 4,000 fonts... [swabloo]'s goin down!!! HAR HAR HAR!!! 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -blinks- [i get the feeling you and swabloo are in a battle?] 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... whatever gave you that idea? 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she rolls her eyes- [everything you two do i guess] 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -walks in-okay if one more creature comes up to me i am gonna has a fit! 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches Tim the snake slither up to you* 2004-11-07 [Snowflame]: lmao!! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -her ankh glows red and grabs tim by the neck choking him-i dont think so- her eyes turn red and tim the snake catches on fire and explodes-i told you not to mess with me! 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -an evil smile crosses her face as she shifts into wolf form and pins her to the ground- 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: har har!!! she just "choked the ol' one eyed snake"! *laughs* 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at white- 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles as she howls- 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes go pitch black- 2004-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she looks back down at aki and jumps off- -she growls as her eyes go white- 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -stands up and brushes herself off-........ 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yeah... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: are you challenging me white?cause you know thats not a good idea.. 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure it is... we need a good show, right Bob? *he shakes his head* 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: who the fuck is bob? 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... Bob? 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -rolls eyes- is it the floor?or maybe the table!!! 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: or maybe the guy this diner is named after! 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: maybe that would actually be the only normal thing here 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: you don't know Bob too well do you? 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: no i dont i dont even know him 2004-11-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: and I don't think you want to... 2004-11-07 [Acidic Khemica]: no i do introduce me... 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Acidic Khemica], meet Bob... Bob, meet [Acidic Khemica]... *bob waddles off to his hole in the floor* 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: uh what is bob? 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: a humanish creature 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: ah so is he the closest thing to a human you can find here? 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: oh heh and what are you? 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: read the name... 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: your a cat? 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: no, I'm a dog... 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: -rolls her eyes- no words can explain what i am 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: I"M BACK!!!!!! 2004-11-08 [Beo-Wulf]: I'M BACK TOO!!!!!!! 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: .......... 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Garfield I can't make it on the weekends....I'm usually out with Gothic Vampire 2004-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: WASSUP,MA HOMIE HOOKERS?!?!you are women,right? 2004-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-08 [Beo-Wulf]: Same with me....I am usually out with [Angelic nightmares] On the weekends 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: weekends is pretty much our time together.....well.......sides during the week 2004-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up?are you two goin' out or something? 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah............been together since the 4th of September 2004-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....*eats more chinese food and mocks [Sagacious Turkey]* 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: How comes you eat that stuff when garfield says you cant?? 2004-11-08 [Beo-Wulf]: [Mortified Penguin] What kind of chinese food are you eating?....I like Orange Chicken....That should be on the menu....Hay [Sagacious Turkey] Please put Orange Chicken on the menu 2004-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: 'cause its funny*mocks garfield*HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!!!!!*eats more chinese food* 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] walks over to [Beo-Wulf] and jumps up in his lap* 2004-11-08 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello Ginger.....Nice to see you I missed you 2004-11-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles and looks up* I Misseded you too Master 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: -shakes head- 2004-11-08 [Beo-Wulf]: I loves you [Angelic nightmares] I really do 2004-11-08 [Beo-Wulf]: I need some coffee....[Sagacious Turkey] Can you please put coffee on the menu? 2004-11-08 [swabloo]: does nobody like my new badges? *sniff* 2004-11-08 [Snowflame]: I do :) 2004-11-08 [swabloo]: yay!^_^ 2004-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she lands down from the rafters- 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: har har! mine has only been up for 2 days and it already has 5 votes! and for all you stupid people... YOU CAN CHANGE THE MENU WITHOUT ASKING ME!!! 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: since when did bob get some rafters? 2004-11-08 [Snowflame]: I dunno 2004-11-08 [swabloo]: maybe he hit his head on empty space and thought summat needed to be there? 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: strange... 2004-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -seh looks at garfield- [they come with me.....] -she smiles showing her fangs- 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeech... you should clip those... 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: -walks in- 2004-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -her eyes glow a light red as she glances at garfields neck she licks her lips and sits down- [hey you know me i'll have the globe of blood] 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: did you learn about this place from [Mortified Penguin]? (speaking to akiratetsuo) 2004-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at her- [you talking to me?] 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes change to wicked blue- 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: yes..... 2004-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: not you whitey... 2004-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she nods and waves her hand as a bloody glass apears and she sips at the blood- 2004-11-08 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at the blood and her eyes turn blood red then she shakes her head and her eyes turn back to the wicked blue- 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *runs to the bathroom and throws up* 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly stands up and flushes the toilet* Lord I only hoe Garfield and them don't want to put that on the menu 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay [Sagacious Turkey] Can you please put Coffee on the menu 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: so you people have weak stomachs 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: I need coffee......Please give me some coffee 2004-11-09 [Leelo]: This place looks cool! I wanna join or somethign! 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes this is a really cool place....I work here I am the Waitor and my girlfriend [Angelic nightmares] is the Waitress 2004-11-09 [Leelo]: AWESOME AWESOME!!! What can I do?^^'; 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Leelo] Ask [Sagacious Turkey] To give you a job 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Sagacious Turkey] Is the Manager of Bob's Diner 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Puts money in the cash box and gets a [Hot salty goblet of blood] 2004-11-09 [Leelo]: lol alright thanks^^ 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Your welcome 2004-11-09 [Leelo]: Ok I message him, I think I know who garfield is lol we've chatted in some otehr wiki lol 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Alright 2004-11-09 [Leelo]: lol 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles at [Beo-Wulf]* Like braggin' about them there jobs dont ya? *kisses him* 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: I still want some coffee 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *gives [Beo-Wulf] a pot of coffee* Have fun..... 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Yay thank you so much [Angelic nightmares]...I love you 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *stands there with an innocent look on my face* Your welcome 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] I am ready to order now 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks over to [Beo-Wulf]* what can I get ya sexy? 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] I want to order a [Hot salty goblet of blood] 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: okie-tay *gives [Beo-Wulf] a [hot satly goblet of blood]* Is that all 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] I will like to order a cup of coffee and a side order of you 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *blushes deeper than before* 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] forget the coffee can I just get a side order of you 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits in [Beo-Wulf]'s lap* I loves you Josh.....I really do....... 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh Wow.....I like....I loves you [Angelic nightmares] 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles* Josh? 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] Did you want to ask me something? 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: Yes I did........ *bites her bottom lip* Will you Marrie me? 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] I have something to tell you 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: ........ *looks at [Beo-Wulf]* Yeah? 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] Yes I will marrie you....Will you marrie me? 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles* 'Tourse I will marrie you! Your the love of my life, and theres nothing I want more than to be with you. 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Awww you are really sweet.....I want to get married really soon 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: I know.......your not the only one you doesn't want to wait.........hopefully we can get married sooner than planned 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: -walks in- 2004-11-09 [Snowflame]: hello! 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: hi 2004-11-09 [Snowflame]: :) 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: -summons a chair and sits down- 2004-11-09 [Snowflame]: *whistles a tune* 2004-11-09 [swabloo]: *yawn* does anybody know what a publicist is? 2004-11-09 [Snowflame]: me dush. 2004-11-09 [swabloo]: wat? WAT IS IT???? 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: dont know and dont care 2004-11-09 [sara(:]: *walks in* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she sits down at the bar- 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in and stares*women.......... 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she looks at him- [ok now i need to know who you're talking about] 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at nc- 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... if ya wanna make out, go here! "Bob's Makeout Shack" 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo blob! wat up ma homie C?! 2004-11-09 [sara(:]: *throws a chair @ lardo* and what was that supposed to mean and who were u talking about? 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she throughs her head back and laughs- [i think it's about time] -she winks- [JKing] 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh,yo moon do you have a family discount....... 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey blob, visit "Bob's Makeout Shack" 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: i just did,ho!(woops!that''s sarahs name!) 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -her mouth drops open as no words come out- 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm sorry for my language,wolfy.....*eats chinese food* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she keeps her mouth open as she starts to giggle uncontrolabley- 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs- 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: are you in heat or something?*eats chinese food**talking to wolf* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she growls and jumps in the middle of his side pushing the chinese food out of his reach- [nope i'm not] 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes change to a wicked blue- 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... chinese food! *eats it* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she throughs nc into a table shattering it- 2004-11-09 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at white-be nice.... 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles at aki her eyes ice blue- [i am consetering what i could be doing] 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tosses whitey a butcher knife* hurry up, we need more food... 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she grins standing over nc- -she tosses the knife out the door a cow's scream is heard as she smiles- [finaly got my aim right] 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: noooo!!! that was carl, my pet cow!!! *sobs* oh, well... *buys a new cow* 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *orders more chinese food while eating ramen and hitting wolf*TAKE THIS,MONGREL!!!!!! 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she shakes her head as a mad villager enters- [nope it was the next door nabories cow bessy] -she giggles as she walks out side picking up the cow and bringing it in side- 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, carl is on tha menyou... 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she takes out the knife and slames it into the arm that nc is using to eat pinning it to the bar- [there now don't hit me agin kk] 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: not very good at spelling as before,eh wolfy?*amputates arm* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she growls at him- [well i can spell this Y-O-U A-R-E A-N ASS HOLE!!! there happly bitch ^^] -she smiles as she sits down agin- 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *recieves chinese food*ALL RIGHT!!!!!!!*digs in* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she takes it from him and crushes the phone so he can't get any more haha!!!- -she eats it nanananana!!!!!!- 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh...and a nice attitude as well,i see...... 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: tisk tisk... I warned you before... *shoots 3 more chinese children* 2004-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles and nods- [oh yes yes i do hehehe] -she slaps the back of his head as she nods- [ok i need to go bye all^^] 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: i own a store you idiot!i get my chinese food from here!HAR HAR!!BEAT THAT!!!!not that way,though..... 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food* 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in* oh wow........ 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... *shoots a chinese kid as he screams* 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches* Nice shot cat! 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello [Angelic nightmares] What can I get you? 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over at [Beo-Wulf] and smiles* nuttin I'm good....... 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] Are you sure?.....Do you want a [Hot salty goblet of blood]? 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: hmmm *thinks* not at the moment......I wonder.........what the hell...sure I'll take one *hands [Beo-Wulf] a dollar for the drink* 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey you two... if ya wanna make out visit "Bob's Makeout Shack" 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm not making out with him 2004-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*....... 2004-11-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Thank you [Angelic nightmares].....I am sorry [Sagacious Turkey] 2004-11-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: just sayin'... *shoots a chinese kid* 2004-11-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* Hey cat....you shoot so many of them kids........why not put their dead bodies on the menu?? 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares]...........Thats funny 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: ........yeah......its true tho......he shoots so many of them kids 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes I know 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits at a table and lays my head down* 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Aww [Angelic nightmares] Whats wrong? 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* nuttin.......just thinking about that song 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Alright.....*Gives [Angelic nightmares] A big hug and a kiss* 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles* thanks....[Beo-Wulf] *changes in to her [wolf form]* 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Aww my Wolfie came out....Its good to see you Ginger 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Hello Master 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello Ginger how are you? 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Ok I guess 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn lazy menu changer... *mumbles* 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks up to garfield* 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: hi 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello [Sagacious Turkey] 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello [Sagacious Turkey] How are you? 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks back to [Beo-Wulf]* 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello honey....I missed you 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles* I missed you to 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... viral? 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: huh? 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: lol 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes head* 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have viral cancer... *coughs on the food* anyone hungry? 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: I think I'll pass on the food cat 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: I'VE ATEN CAT FOOD BEFORE!!! IT'S QUITE DELISICOUS!!! 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: I ate dog food when I was little.....and a few months ago my brother ate of of my dogs treats 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: AWESOME A year ago i ate cat food and tehn dog food and then pig food Bona patete!!! 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *is bored* 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeech... *twitches* 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Aww [Angelic nightmares] Is bored.....What can I do to help? 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles with [Beo-Wulf]* 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: Here we go again lol ^^'; 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Holds [Angelic nightmares] Tight 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey now! don't make me put something on the menu that you will have trouble living without! 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: lol I didn't say anythign wrong lol 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *howls* nooooo we're gonna need that......later in life....... 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: besides you already ate me 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: [Sagacious Turkey] Are you thinking about putting [Angelic nightmares] On the menu? 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! peace! I'm out! 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: (pssst! that means bye!) 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Bye [Sagacious Turkey] 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: I think he was refering to your....ummm.........friend down stairs 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll let you do that... 2004-11-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Ummm Ok 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: now you puppys be good while I'm gone! *slithers away* 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, and you kittys too... 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles a devilish smile* 2004-11-10 [Leelo]: lol byes 2004-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*.......ooooooh.....late.........and angry........ 2004-11-10 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: snickerdoodle got eaten? she's dead? again?? ...noooooo 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Shes died before? If shes died before, then she cant be dead again.........ya cant kill what already dead!! 2004-11-10 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: but she comes back to life again... it's her 'gift' 2004-11-10 [Angelic nightmares]: ah......ok.....well........anyways....I'm outtie! Gotts to call my Master........then go to school :( 2004-11-10 [Snowflame]: :( 2004-11-10 [swabloo]: bye 2004-11-10 [Snowflame]: hey swab 2004-11-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she runs in and tackles nc- 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots a chinese kid* no more ramen, darn you! 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -walks in her eyes a wicked gold color-seems i have missed something... 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah, [Acidic Khemica]... Iv'e been, expecting you... have a seat please. Now, would you say you are a good worker? 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -as he motions to the chair she is sitting in it before he can blink-a good worker as in what type of working are you talking about? 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: as in, a kind, hard working, devoted person... 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: uh yes..... 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok, that's good... I wish to hire you. 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: um alright as long as the gremlin doenst come near me and sorry about tim the snake 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes change to a wicked blue-i hope you understand what you are hireing 2004-11-10 [sara(:]: *walks in and sits down* 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... you are our new... [insert dramatic pause here]... Co Assistant Rock polisher! no need to thank me... 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: ..........okay.............-summons a glass of blood and drinks alittle-what do you need rock polishers for?just curious 2004-11-10 [sara(:]: uhhh...i don't think you really wanna know that.... 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: actually i do and i could care less but if i am going to do something i want to know what i am getting into if nothing else ill work in the bar 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... well, ya polish rocks... you wouldn't want our loyal customers eating rough rocks would you?! 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: you feed people rocks!!!!!?????? 2004-11-10 [sara(:]: i told ya.... 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey, wat did you expect? this ain't yer average diner... 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: so i noticed 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... we have more votes than members... hmm... 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: wierd 2004-11-10 [swabloo]: omg someone actually thought this was an AVERAGE diner? oh, please! average diners don't have a half vampire&half fox for a publicist! ^_^ 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: no i knew it wasnt normal when a floor gremlin asked me out!!!!-apears at the bar before anyone can blink and sits down drinking the blood- 2004-11-10 [sara(:]: exactly! 2004-11-10 [swabloo]: yupppers!!!!!!!!! :•) 2004-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: S'UP HOOKERS?!?!(that means you moony...) 2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: EEEEEEEEK!!!! CLOWNS HAVE INVADED!!! *hides* oh, wait! that's just you, [sara(:]! 2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -she blends into the shadows-better hope i dont poison the rocks 2004-11-10 [swabloo]: 
smiley face with the big nose says S'UP NC?     :•)
2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tosses butcher knife to [sara(:]* I think you know what to do...
2004-11-10 [swabloo]:
smiley face with the big nose says S'UP NC?          :•)
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: oOoOh! knife....... *eats knife* cudda done wiv a bit more ketchup...
2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws knives at [swabloo]*
2004-11-10 [sara(:]: *draws her sword* don't worry i can take care of this with my own weapons*charges at nc-17*
2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: have some catsup! *throws an open bottle at [swabloo]*
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: *eyes flash and unsheeths sword* it blood-shedding time! *grin*
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -watches them- i am surrounded by idiots...-finishes drinking the blood in the glass-
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: *while charging, eats pointy and tastey things being thrown at her* i can only eat them 'coz of my vampire teeth, they are VERY hard and will chew through metal (i think you already know that...)
2004-11-10 [sara(:]: *eyes turn red*
2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *pulls out a toy sword and pokes [Mortified Penguin] in the eye with it* take that ye mongrel!
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -laughs- i love this!!death fills the room tonight!!
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: the blue son is rising.... that means the computer screen is destroying my eyesite...
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: .............
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: ;)
2004-11-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: 0o0o0o0o!
2004-11-10 [sara(:]: *takes sword and slices nc-17's arm off* i wish i could do more but i must go [swabloo] will you finish the job?
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -narrows her eyes as they become a gold color-
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: i could, but i'm too buisy trying to get to all my friends houses and start to watch them... it will take a while.
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: why are you killing nc?
2004-11-10 [swabloo]: urm <<>><<>> [Sagacious Turkey] started it!
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs-im not going to kill you i just want to know
2004-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*eats chinese food*.......um...why does everyone despise me?.......:(
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: i dont
2004-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *speaking to akira*your my friend,but swabloo.......*pulls out chaisaw*TEXA-wait,no-ALABAMA CHAINSAW MASSACRE!!!!HAR HAR!!!!!*starts swinging chainsaw*
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: -laughs as a glass apears in her hand with blood filled in it she drinks it trying not to laugh-
2004-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ARE YOU LAUGHIN' AT ME,PUNK?HUH?i thought so....didya get the newest S.J.?
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: what is s.j?
2004-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: you don't get shonen jump?
2004-11-10 [Acidic Khemica]: ohhhhh yes i do i love shonen jump its awsome
2004-11-11 [Rick-P]: ^_^*Watches Khalo and Nc talk*
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: riku!-hugs him- guess what.....i get to be a rock polisher...joy-sarcasm-
2004-11-11 [Rick-P]: Rock polisher?*Thinks of what it means*^_^'
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: yea they feed people rocks!!!!!its so wierd!
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: sooooo? your point is?
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: how can you bite a rock
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry, we have some preused dentures you can have in the back if the rocks are too hard...
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.0'
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry... last year we had to kill off our "older" staff members... couldn't just let their dentures go to waste could we?
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs-this is going to take alot of getting used to
2004-11-11 [silvermoon dragon]: i thought i told you to change that dont make me hurt you dustin cause you know i will
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: ....
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he...
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -_-
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! chuck wagon! wat ya wanna be?!
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: ..........
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: imma talkin' ta chiz whiz...
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: confused 0.o
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: [silvermoon dragon]
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: oh alright
2004-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... yeeeeeaaaahhh...
2004-11-11 [PixieStickChick]: Finally!!!! [Angelic nightmares] and [Beo-Wulf] got they're own space to be all lovey dovey!!! (I'm not saying that I don't like you guys it was just a bit nauseating) ^_^
2004-11-11 [Angelic nightmares]: [Angelic nightmares] and [Beo-Wulf] Are FINALLY offically engaged!!!
2004-11-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *quickly changes into her wolf form and chases after the loose crickets*
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: ......................okay
2004-11-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly walks up to [Acidic Khemica]*
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes turn icy cold-
2004-11-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *back away slowly*
2004-11-11 [Angelic nightmares]: gad damn it! I gotta go to school *changes to human form* Cat I changed the specials picture for you
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -smirks and walks over to the bar and sits down and summons a glass of blood-try some....
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: wow one thing that is normal
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -shifts into human form but still has her same eye color and her fangs-
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up hookers?
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -takles nc and slaps him on the head a lot- [how many times do i have to do this to you?!]
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: huh?..........oh....the hooker "coment".......well.......PROSTITUTES!!!!HAR HAR!!!!!*cough,wheeze*
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she pushes his head into the ground to shut him up-
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *muffled*how's about ho?*chokes*
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she jumps up and down on his butt trying to make him pass out-
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *walks in* that's a lot of jumping ur gonna have to do......
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she nods and pins him leg to the floor with a dagger as she stands and walks to the bar-
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *waks by nc-17 laughing**sits down at the bar*
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she giggles as she waves her hand and a bottle of hard blood apears-
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ow!my balls!stop jumping on me,wolfy!
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *looks @ nc-17*you have balls? yeah right!
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she licks her finger and makes a hissing sound- [wow you just got burned my friend]
2004-11-11 [Beo-Wulf]: Puts money in the cash box and gets a [Hot salty goblet of blood]
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *laughs*
2004-11-11 [Beo-Wulf]: What is so funny [sara(:]?....I work here
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: oh...i'm laughing at nc-17....i work here to.....
2004-11-11 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh ok....I know that you work here....LOL
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: yo,moon,you still got that family discount,hooker?
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *draws her sword and changes into her demon form* time to do my job as the butcher!!!*charges at nc-17*
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: bitch-woops!i mean-butcher,when will you learn,you impudent,moronic,freak?*jumps over blade*
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *stops* i have not swung the blade yet fool!!!!
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she grabs her daggers a deadly smile on her face- [oh look a moving target..] -she throughs a dagger at nc and misses him-
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: *puts her sword back in it's sheath* oh and thanx for calling me a freak...lardo!*takes out a japanese fan* dance of the dead *dead people attack nc-17* i new the stash of dead bodies would come in handy..
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: up yers,wolfy!!*kills the hooker-i mean-butcher*
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she walks up to him hugging him as well as pushing a dagger into his ass-
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ouchies!*pulls dagger out and stabs wolfy's bra*HAR HAR,I SEE YOU!!!o_
2004-11-11 [sara(:]: you can't kill me......i am immortal.....god what an idiot!
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she growls and puts 20 daggers in his ass so it looks like his butt is made of just metal- [you pimp!!] -she walks into the bathroom and changes her bra-
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: i wouldn't go there if i were you....i'm the janitor...*pulls out daggers*OUCHIES!!
2004-11-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles watching his pain-
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: GO ORICHAMARU!!!!
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: ...................
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: you don't know who Orichamaru is,little kid?
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: no
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: then you haven't read mthe newest naruto chapters,my son.......
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: son???um no i am a girl
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: sure you are........rock polisher......
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -eyes turn icy cold and apears behind him and grabs him by the neck and lifts him off the ground-and ill shove them all down your throat!!!
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *chokes*shove what?your mama?*wheeze*
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: if my mother wasnt dead yes i would to!!!!!
2004-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: wha?!?!?!?!woops.......*sighs*......
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -drops him to the ground and sighs walking over to the bar-
2004-11-11 [Rick-P]: O.o!
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: sry riku alittle pissed at him
2004-11-11 [Rick-P]: Hey nc how dare you call my wife a he!¬.¬
2004-11-11 [Acidic Khemica]: -laughs-
2004-11-12 [Rick-P]: ^_^
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: -hugs riku-
2004-11-12 [Rick-P]: *Gets huged and hug her back*
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: so how are you?
2004-11-12 [Rick-P]: fine you?^_^
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: alright
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes you are... *whistles*
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at garfield-who did you whistle at?!
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... um... bob?
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats chinese food*uh huh.....
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! screw chinese food!!! GO JAPANESE FOOD!!! oh, that lymeric has to go...
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: ......................
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: it will never go away!HAR HAR!!!
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh, yeah?! take this! .......................................................
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: ........
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....hey ya'll!(not the song you idiots!)read my "description"
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: uh okay
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: instead of "giant mole" put "mole the size of texas"
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: and put quotations on face... "face"
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: dude i was gonna put that......
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: you know that you're not really supposed to have copyrighted images in your house, right?
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: it's not "copyright"....it's an endorsement......
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: same difference
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.......
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: Omg a monkey!! *points*
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.......
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: *stares at [Mortified Penguin]*
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stares at [Sagacious Turkey]* what a dor- woops, thats me!
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: *pokes [Mortified Penguin]* (I know one phrase that will freak just about anyone out) *evil laugh*
2004-11-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] walks in and sits in front of the fire*
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: *runs to [Angelic nightmares] and stares at her*
2004-11-12 [Beo-Wulf]: *Walks over to [Angelic nightmares] And puts my arms around her*....*Then gives her a kiss*
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: *covers her eyes and runs away from [Angelic nightmares] and [Beo-Wulf]* Evil!!!
2004-11-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *growls at Pixie* ...............*cuddles up to her master*
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: *throws a leg at Ronald* hush wolf!
2004-11-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at the leg* I dont want that!
2004-11-12 [PixieStickChick]: Oh fine! *takes the leg and puts it on the menu*
2004-11-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes head*
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: -walks in her eyes icy cold-
2004-11-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] walks over by the fire and curls up in a ball*
2004-11-12 [Beo-Wulf]: Walks over to my wolfie[Angelic nightmares]....I loves you so much
2004-11-12 [Snowflame]: get a room lol
2004-11-12 [Snowflame]: j/k
2004-11-12 [Beo-Wulf]: oh sorry [Snowflame].....LOL
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: they have a room... but noooooo... they don't use it!
2004-11-12 [Acidic Khemica]: -shakes head-
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: let me help... *shakes your help*
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... booga?
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh...hookers?....*eats ramen*...GO NARUTO!!!
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots naruto* HAR HAR HAR!!!
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh....GO SASUKE!!!!!*kills bob,the "official" mascot...*HAR HAR HAR!!!!
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: who cares about bob... *kicks his limp body*
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*....
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh jr...? CLICK HERE!!! open gallery 1 *twitches*
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*....
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: did *twitch* you *twitch* click *twich* it? *TWITCH!!!*
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh....yeah....*throws viagra around*
2004-11-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! I should stop searching for wikis... *twitches and eats viagra*
2004-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: yup....why'd you pat my head?
2004-11-12 [Rick-P]: There you are!>. 
2004-11-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: mwa ha ha ha!!!
2004-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT THE HACK?!?!
2004-11-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: check out the pics of the staff
2004-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: whoa.....cool....*eats ramen*...
2004-11-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sniff sniff* I smell sarcasm here!
2004-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: WHOA!!!!!!WHAT HAPPENED?!?!?!
2004-11-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: that freak from the fan club tried to ruin it... good ol' back-ups...
2004-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: oh....i see.....*eats ramen*....
2004-11-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw! I thought you were blind!
2004-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: darn you!!!...*eats ramen*....
2004-11-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn yourself!
2004-11-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] walks in and sits in a corner*
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: WASSUP?!?
2004-11-14 [swabloo]: no, no nc.... it is
WAZZUP?!?
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs-
2004-11-14 [swabloo]: *plays with scissors*
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -runs her dagger across her tongue letting the blood fill her mouth-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: YO!swab!change your name to "swabloo,the monkey"you know because of your monkey nuts?and akira...........*hands her a goblet of blood*.....
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at nc and takes the goblet-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: .....*eats ramen*.......
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -drinks the blood-
2004-11-14 [Deadly_DNA_Girl]: what the hell is ramen? in dutch that means 'windows'
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: so i see your back.....in japan it means "noodles"
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -eyes turn blood red-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: what's your deal?
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at nc-nothing....
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*....
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: maybe
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT THE HACK?!?!
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -grins and pulls out her dagger and her eyes go black and so do her veins-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: uh....what are you doing?*slowly backs away*
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -she returns to normal and laughs-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*....
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *chews on akira's hair*...mmmm....chewy............j/k!!!!please don't kill me!
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: -glares at him-
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: hee hee.....read the menu...i added some "stuff".......*eats ramen*...
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: oh joy now what
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: go to hitmen united !!NOW!!!and join...add some pictures if you like....*eats ramen*....
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: um later
2004-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: darn....*eats ramen*...
2004-11-14 [Acidic Khemica]: heh
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeeeeeeessssssss?!
2004-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: HI!
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots you with a harpoon*
2004-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *dodges*har!*trips* crap..*runs out of sushi*darn...*eats viagra*WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: that ain't viagra... it's cough medicine...
2004-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: woops....oh well...WHEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.o?
2004-11-15 [PixieStickChick]: *tackles garfield* Hiya!!!
2004-11-15 [Beautiful darkness]: jr shut up lol
2004-11-15 [PixieStickChick]: *gets off garfield and tackles megan instead* HIYA!!!
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -sits down and watches-
2004-11-15 [PixieStickChick]: *looks up at akira and wonders if it'd be fatal to tackle her too*
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes turn icy cold-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws boiling poo stew on her eyes* that should stop em from turnin' icy cold!
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -stands up and apears behind him before he can blink and a dagger at his throat-now if you were a right minded person you wouldnt have done it
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... yeah I would...
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -cuts her bottom lip and licks the blood away-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeech... that must hurt... HAVE SOME ALCOHOL TO GO WITH IT!!! *pours alcohol on the cut*
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *giggles and hides*
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -the cut heals-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mubbles*
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! type some random numbers or letters!
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: like so... dagb4y q5y 32y5v2652c5
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -glares at him-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: do it...
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm tryin ta test here!
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: why?
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: so I can try to delete it...
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... pretty buttons...
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh oh...
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: you deleted the names asshole
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: there ya go lil' turkey! nice an' nameful again!
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: turkey?
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]:
yes, turkey...
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -rolls her eyes-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: I will delete the next message...
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: okay
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: nevermind...
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yeah...
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -her eyes turn red and she puts up a shield-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: eee... that shield is dirty... how about a good ol' spit shine! *hacks a hairball on the shield*
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -runs her dagger across her tongue gently and i thin line of blood apears and her tongue heal-
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: interesting... *barfs*
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: -grins- you have a weak stomach
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: either that, or it could be that burrito...
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: posibly
2004-11-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... kinda boring here... whatever happened to the rest of the staff?
2004-11-15 [Acidic Khemica]: i dont know
2004-11-16 [Ikko]: Hi Khalo!^_^
2004-11-16 [Acidic Khemica]: ikko hey ^_^
2004-11-16 [PixieStickChick]: Me here now! *dances*
2004-11-16 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at pixie-riight
2004-11-16 [Ikko]: *Laughs*So how are you Khalo?
2004-11-16 [Acidic Khemica]: im alright ikko and yourself?
2004-11-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: indeed... hoochie hoochie hoochie!!!
2004-11-16 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at cat- riiight
2004-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ugh! i'm gone for ONE day,and this is all ya have done?!?!
2004-11-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... I put the yen sign up there... yo! here is where you can find signs... http://www.smartvisit.com/tech/characters.htm
2004-11-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯
2004-11-16 [swabloo]: urhm can i make a none moving piccy for the publicist? (a.k.a me)?????
2004-11-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure...
2004-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: jokes ©™¿?!!
2004-11-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: new badge!!!
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: i have a picture by my name on the staff list....i feel special.....
2004-11-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: you are special...
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: hehehehe....yeah.....*whispers to dustin "she must be going through her period!"*
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *bored*
2004-11-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: going through? HECK! she's in the eye of it!
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: exactly....
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: oh wow
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *slaps dustin* and now for jr.*grabs the butcher knife*
2004-11-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: mrs. bice laughed when she found out you had to go home to work...
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *quickly changes into a wolf and hides under a table*
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: up yers,BITCH!!!!!.......*steals knife*...
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at the knife and grabs it out of moon's hands- you know you shouldnt play with knives
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *shrugs* *changes into her demon form* you don't think i have more? *hurls a bunch of knives at him and pins him to the wall with them(and not by ur shirt if you know what i mean)*
2004-11-17 [Beo-Wulf]: *Goes to [Angelic nightmares] and puts arms around her*
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: she's a "butcher".....hee hee....
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *looks at akiratesuo* don't worry...it's my job.....
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes and continues to hide under the table*
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: blow job,you mean.....
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: whatever -walks over to a dark corner and summons a chair and sits down and twirls her dagger-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *pokes head out from under the table*
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *throws a knife at jr and it hits him in the eye* i'd shut up if i were u....i already got u pinned to the wall.....and more knives.....*jerks the knife out of his eye*
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *ducks back under the table*
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....*eats ramen*...hush little girl who is older than me...you might hurt yourself....
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: -stabs the dagger through her wrist and then pulls it out and watches it bleed for a moment and then her eyes glow black and the cut heals and her eyes stop glowing-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *howls*
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *cuts his lips off* try talking without those.......*looks at akiratesuo* what's the matter?
2004-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....*goes watch porn in room*...WHEEEEEEEE!!!!
2004-11-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: indeed...
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at moon*what made you think something was wrong?*stabs the dagger through her wrist again and leaves it there just grining from the shadows*
2004-11-17 [Beo-Wulf]: *Looks lost* Sees [Angelic nightmares] and runs to her *Gives her a big kiss*
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: well the fact that u keep stabbing your wrist with your daggers might indicate something......is there any thing wrong?
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to [Beo-Wulf]*
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: no im fine..
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: ok...if you say so....and dustin....you're cleaning up jr's mess in that other room....the one he's watching "porn" in.....
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks around*
2004-11-17 [Beo-Wulf]: Walks up to [Angelic nightmares] And *gives her a hug*
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to [Beo-Wulf]*
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *hovers in the air sitting indian style and starts meditating*
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: *sings softly*
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *curls up in a ball by the fire*
2004-11-17 [sara(:]: *closes her eyes*
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at the ground and her eyes glow blue*
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks*
2004-11-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks into the dinner laughing at the newest banner-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *gets up and streches and then lays back down*
2004-11-17 [Beo-Wulf]: Lays next to [Angelic nightmares]*Gives her a kiss*
2004-11-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at gothic and fonald- [bad time] -she grins her eyes flashing red as she sits down at the bar-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to [Beo-Wulf]* ..............
2004-11-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -waves her hand as a bottle of blood apears- -she bites off the top and sips the drink-
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: -sits down next to white-
2004-11-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -glances at gothic and ronald agin before going back to her drink-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: click on the fallowig link to here a song by one of the geartest singers ever http://www.geocities.com/demuredenisewavs03/ElvisPresley.htm
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: -sighs and puts her head on the bar table-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks up to [Acidic Khemica]* You ok?
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at her- yea fine...-her eyes glow red and a wine glass apears in her hand and blood is in it instead of wine-
2004-11-17 [Angelic nightmares]: ok.....if you say so......*walks back over to the fire and lays back down*
2004-11-17 [Acidic Khemica]: -sips some of the blood-
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *curls up in a ball watches as the heat of the flames warms her whole body*
2004-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: see? this place is boring without me! *splashes everyone with water* HAR HAR HAR!!!
2004-11-18 [Accio]: Or maybe it's just peaceful. And you are a cat, you aren't supposed to like water.
2004-11-18 [PixieStickChick]: Yea but he's "special"
2004-11-18 [Acidic Khemica]: -_-
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowll opens eyes* Shit! Why did I fall asleep here??? *stretches and walks around*
2004-11-18 [Accio]: Special Ed? -smiles and pets Ronald- Ok, Mr. Bigglesworth, it is time to take over the world.... and quite possibly The Bush Administration... muahahahaha... hahahaha.... hahahaha... ok that's enough.
2004-11-18 [Acidic Khemica]: ....
2004-11-18 [Accio]: AHAHAHAHAHa...heh... hah... eh... fugget
2004-11-18 [Acidic Khemica]: *drinks from her wine glass and sips the blood*
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *licks [Accio]'s hand and sits back down by the fire*
2004-11-18 [Accio]: w00t, I got licked... wait... that's by a girl... not w00t... Still cool though.
2004-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm available for any "licking" that must be done...
2004-11-18 [Accio]: I would lick you Garfield... but currently I am taken... so sorry :)
2004-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn...
2004-11-18 [PixieStickChick]: *walks over to the fire and sits down in front of it*
2004-11-18 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2004-11-18 [PixieStickChick]: *sighs and continues to stare into the fire*
2004-11-18 [Accio]: lol
2004-11-18 [Acidic Khemica]: *sips more of the blood*
2004-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2004-11-18 [Accio]: -pounces garfield-
2004-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: wheee!
2004-11-18 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........
2004-11-18 [PixieStickChick]: *goes into the kitchen and makes herself an extra crispy poodle
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches the flames crakle*
2004-11-18 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* Hi [sara(:] *looks back at the flames*
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *changes into my human self and walks over to a table* .................. *wipes a tear from my eye*
2004-11-18 [sara(:]: hi....i gotta go bye!
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *wipes away another tear* I'm ok......siriusly........I'm ok............dont ask........I'm OK!!
2004-11-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Walks over to [Angelic nightmares] *Gives her a hug and holds her tight*
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *tries to smile* ............... *wipes away the tears*
2004-11-18 [Beo-Wulf]: I am really sorry for today and yeasterday....Please forgive me......I loves you so much
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at her master and sits on the floor fiddeling sadly with her collar and chain thats fastened to [Beo-Wulf]s belt and thinks shes doomed for all eternity as a pet and nothing more but loves her master and didnt mean to upset him* ................... Josh...........I do forgive you.....I loves you.....I really do
2004-11-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Looks at Ginger[Angelic nightmares] You are not doomed for all eternity....I am sorry I really am....I loves you so much....I just really need to be with you.
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm your "pet" ain't I?
2004-11-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes you are my pet....You are my wolfie
2004-11-18 [Angelic nightmares]: There for I will be your pet and nothing more for all of etenity for all eternity
2004-11-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes you will...You will always be my Wolfie
2004-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm so glad I could share this beautiful moment with you... I think I'll go hark now...
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: dont worrie cat......we moved the convo to one of my wikis
2004-11-19 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.o?
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: ................ *sighs*
2004-11-19 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] curls up in a ball by the fire*
2004-11-19 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches*you seem down
2004-11-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she walks in and sits down at the bar-
2004-11-19 [Acidic Khemica]: -looks at white-
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* who looks down?
2004-11-19 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at ronald* you do ^_^
2004-11-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she turns to ronald and grins waving her hand as a bottle of blood apears- [i'm simple i always get the same drink]
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm fine....really I am.....hey white.....hows it going *looks at the fire*
2004-11-19 [Beo-Wulf]: Joins [Angelic nightmares] At the fire
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up at her master*
2004-11-19 [Beo-Wulf]: Looks at Ginger[Angelic nightmares]*Takes her to the fire and holds her tight*
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks* .............a mere pet............
2004-11-19 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] You are more that just a pet to me. I need to be held
2004-11-19 [Angelic nightmares]: ....................................... *cuddles up to [Beo-Wulf]* lets finish this convo at Ronni's Pics@wiki..............that way nobody has to read what we're saying.......
2004-11-19 [Beautiful darkness]: hay
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... hay...
2004-11-19 [hellraiser]: yo G!!!!.....it's me......*eats ramen*....
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: ya don't say...
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: rate-a-house...
2004-11-19 [hellraiser]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*...
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: look at my house on linkmeet...
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: tell me blow jobs password and I'll tell you mine
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn, [Hedda] took the girl with the three cheeks away...
2004-11-19 [hellraiser]: uh.....youl really tell me your password?¿
2004-11-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... then I'll delete our conversation... as long as ya don't tell no one else...
2004-11-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in and sits down at the bar-
2004-11-20 [hellraiser]: wattup,wolfy?¿..........psssssst.....i was [Mortified Penguin]......*eats ramen*..
2004-11-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -smirks- [i should have knowen]
2004-11-20 [hellraiser]: yup!you should have!but you didn't,did you?¿..........*eats ramen*....
2004-11-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she sighs and waves her hand making at bottle of blood-
2004-11-20 [hellraiser]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*...
2004-11-20 [El Asesino de pavos]: hey freak
2004-11-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at yoyo- [i know you're not refuring to me]
2004-11-21 [El Asesino de pavos]: your right:p
2004-11-21 [El Asesino de pavos]: µ
2004-11-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: so... jr. taught you the "alt" button?
2004-11-22 [Acidic Khemica]: *walks out of the shadows and loks at white*so it was you all this time?the one who took me in?
2004-11-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: time to pick the top 4 badges!
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]:    reminds me of bob's diner...
2004-11-23 [Tiger Shark]: @o.....*spaz twitch*
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiight...
2004-11-23 [Tiger Shark]: DUCT tape...*twitch*
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yeah...
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: talk to the allmighty duck...
2004-11-23 [Tiger Shark]: duct......bow to the mighty air duct!!!!
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... that'll be goin on the menu... by the way, your badge lost... it only had 2 votes...
2004-11-23 [Tiger Shark]: well it was the last one to be put up. it didn't have as good a chance because less people had the chance to vote on it. Btw, a Hambuger is some one who lives in Hamburg Germany....so...
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't forget a turkey... from turkey...
2004-11-23 [Tiger Shark]: that's a turk, doesn't work. a Frankfurter works though
2004-11-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: indeed...
2004-11-23 [Tiger Shark]: hmm....can't think of any more >< I know there's more...
2004-11-24 [lady nytmare]: .......dustin.......what did i tell you about uploading copyright pictures?¿(especialy the ones that you weren't given permission to download.....)
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: *agrees*
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm going to beat you brutally at school...
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: we'll start by breaking off, and deep frying your toes...
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: *slaps garfield over the head* so much for you being kind today
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mumble mumble* MY wiki My rules...
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WOOOOOOOOOT!!!
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: doesn't account for you being rude. set a good example, and more people will sign up.
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: if only you knew "'[lady nytmare]"... *cough cough* friend of [Mortified Penguin]'s *cough*
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: he was warning you about uploading illegally, it doesn't matter who people are friends with, frankly I don't care. I base whether I like a person or not on their acctions.
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch* *twitch* sorry, I can't help it... HAR HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!!!!!!!!!!
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: this is just funny!!! mwa ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: *sighs and disappears*
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: (sorry, this joke is highly classified)
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: (whatever) *reappears curled up in the corner*
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... watch out for that corner beast... 0_o
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: Oo....*ish confused*
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: name an exact date from 1978, to now...
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: ...
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: come on... name one...
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: Oo.....
2004-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: come on... for example: 9-12-84
2004-11-24 [Angelic nightmares]: Im back......
2004-11-24 [Tiger Shark]: um......364-92 at 10:03:57 PM
2004-11-25 [El Asesino de pavos]: so am i :)
2004-11-25 [Tiger Shark]: Oo
2004-11-25 [PixieStickChick]: meep?
2004-11-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2004-11-25 [swabloo]: WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? where'd all the rest of the banners go? and i never voted for the one that said i voted for!
2004-11-25 [El Asesino de pavos]: hi i have come to bother [Sagacious Turkey]
2004-11-25 [El Asesino de pavos]: sara,step a little bit closer...*grabs a knife from bob*
2004-11-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: you sick, sick little monkey...
2004-11-26 [Snowflame]: >>
2004-11-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: right... [Mortified Penguin]'s brother...
2004-11-26 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........
2004-11-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: reniD s'boB
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: -_-
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: i'm leaving. goodbye. and i'm taking my goblet of blood with me!
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: o.o?.......okay...
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: yeah. nobody cares. this place is STUPID. *emptys draw of knifes* i'm taking these as souveniers!
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs* i would leave myself but i have a friend here that needs me
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: -_-'
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: yea
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: i'm leaving this place, because it is meaningless..... -,-
2004-11-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: fo shizzle!
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: ? fo shizzle? wth-?
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: yea
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: wow.......
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: there shouldn't be a poll on the badges. all of the badges should be put up in a badge page.
2004-11-27 [swabloo]: i worked fucking hard on one of the badges. and then, i came here.... and it was DELETED.
2004-11-27 [Angelic nightmares]: Whats up with the really long poll?
2004-11-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: it was past the deadline, punk! no one voted on it!
2004-11-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: besides, it's still in bob's badges...
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: .......
2004-11-27 [Beo-Wulf]: [ashton] Leave [mit sex], [gkjsjfshjd], [hello hello hi marie], [jdksk] Alone
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: strange
2004-11-27 [Beo-Wulf]: [ashton] Dont make me send a report to the Elftown guards
2004-11-27 [Acidic Khemica]: ....
2004-11-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey, [ashton] can stay... if his name is on the list of members... but it's not, so... shall I delete his comment?
2004-11-27 [Beo-Wulf]: yes you should [Sagacious Turkey]
2004-11-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: if you insist...
2004-11-27 [Beo-Wulf]: I do insist
2004-11-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles and cuddles up to her master [Beo-Wulf]*
2004-11-27 [Beo-Wulf]: Holds my wolfie [Angelic nightmares]....I loves you Ginger
2004-11-27 [Angelic nightmares]: I loves you too Master
2004-11-29 [PixieStickChick]: swabloo left? o.O
2004-11-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... got mad about the poll...
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: *appears* um, I wasn't here to hear this comment, but why should he leave if he isn't a member?
2004-11-30 [Accio]: How about a banner trade, [Sagacious Turkey]? For Harry Potter Fans United
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: ....*goes off to raid the fridge*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: swabloo's a she... and what's a banner trade?
2004-11-30 [Accio]: its where you trade banners? like i put up one of this wikis banners if you put up one of mine.
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: ooohhhh!!!! *feels stupid* I see!!!
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: .....*comes back with a pizza*
2004-11-30 [Accio]: lol ya
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: *growls protecting her mouse garlic crust extra cheese pizza*
2004-11-30 [Accio]: o.0
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: ^-^ *holds out a piece* want one?
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok I'll trade...
2004-11-30 [Accio]: okies
2004-11-30 [Ikko]: *Jumps on Garfield and starts tickling him*Muahahahahahahhaha!!!
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: *munches on a piece*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: *drools at the smell of mouse garlic crust extra cheese pizza*
2004-11-30 [Tiger Shark]: *holds out a piece for pixie*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: Yay! Thankies! *takes pizza and sits to eat it*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits in a shadow*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: *walks over to akira and offers her some pizza*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie and shakes her head and her eyes change to a faint blue*no thank you.......
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: *silently walks over to the bar and brings akira a hot salty goblet of blood* better?
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *tilts her head alittle and takes the goblet and looks at it*um thanks.....*smiles slightly*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: you're welcome *smiles back and walks to a table and sits down*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *she slowly drinks the blood*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: *watches the floor gremlin making sure he doesn't come close*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at the floor gremlin and her eyes turn red while still drinking*~back off gremlin~
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: *looks at akira* thanks *turns back to watch the gremlin crawl away*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *her eyes fade back to the blue and she whipes her mouth off and shrugs*when i cam here he wouldnt get off me so ifigured the same for you*shrugs*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: *looks at akira again and tilts her head to the side slightly* how come your eyes change color?
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey now! what did I tell you people about eating regular food in here?!
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: I'm sorry for once I wanted to eat something and not get sick. o.O
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry about getting sick! we have an antidote! but, it's 34 years past the experation date...
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: Oh lucky me! So if the 'food' doesn't kill me the antidote will
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: btw Dustin, what did you do to the poll??
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry! we have an antidote for that antidote! but, it too, is past the experation date...
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes his fist at [swabloo]* ask her...
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: Oh goodie! So my choices are, death by food, or death by antidote. I think I'll order pizza. 
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: What happened?
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: إنضم الينا وحلق معنا في عالم
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: o.O .....okay then......
2004-11-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: click it! NEW WIKI OF MINE!!!
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: o.O why?
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: [my eyes change color depending on my mood....]
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: Oh, so red would be angry? black then blue is?
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: well i dont really know them all i just know a few sometimes i dont even know they just change
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: oooohh!! interesting! *examines akira more closely*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches pixie as her eyes change to a golden brown and she shifts into her more human form*
2004-11-30 [PixieStickChick]: That is so cool! All my eyes do is glow green and white *pouts*
2004-11-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *smiles alittle*everyone is different
2004-12-01 [PixieStickChick]: *smiles back* Do you have TK or TP powers too?
2004-12-01 [Beo-Wulf]: Gets a [quart of Blood] Puts money in the cash box
2004-12-01 [Beo-Wulf]: Takes [Angelic nightmares] to get burgers from McDonalds
2004-12-01 [Angelic nightmares]: awww.........see peoples? I'm loved!!! *quickly changes into a wolf*
2004-12-01 [Beo-Wulf]: Walks up to [Angelic nightmares] my wolfie....*Gives a kiss on the head* I loves you so much
2004-12-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to my master*
2004-12-01 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2004-12-04 [lady nytmare]: DARN GAURDS!!!!!
2004-12-04 [Acidic Khemica]: [yup i have tk...]*smiles alittle*
2004-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2004-12-04 [Acidic Khemica]: you arnt exactly the brightest crayon in the box
2004-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: I guess you could say I'm a few corndogs shy of a picnic...
2004-12-04 [Acidic Khemica]: true
2004-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...about as bright as a burned out star...
2004-12-04 [Acidic Khemica]: true stars dont have color when they burn out so you must be black or grey or brown something like that
2004-12-04 [PixieStickChick]: does anybody plan on actually changing the specials?
2004-12-04 [Acidic Khemica]: i hope so
2004-12-04 [Angelic nightmares]: I do once in a great while
2004-12-04 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2004-12-06 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2004-12-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... I'm too lazy... hence the reason the special changing job is still open!
2004-12-06 [Acidic Khemica]: .............
2004-12-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: you heard me... *shakes his fist*
2004-12-06 [sara(:]: *sits down* *slaps dustin's fist down*
2004-12-06 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes her head then sits at the bar*
2004-12-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: I believe you mean the "termite infested" bar...
2004-12-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: wheeeee! *tampers with pretty buttons*
2004-12-06 [PixieStickChick]: *walks behind the bar and looks at akira* the usual?
2004-12-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: um...
2004-12-06 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at whoever is talking to her because she cant see the usernames!!!!*yea i guess so
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *hands akira a hot salty goblet of blood* garfield, did you click on the hide usernames?
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*thanks.....
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *smiles* welcomes *pulls out her notepad and starts writing*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *smiles*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *watches the floor gremlin run by and pulls out a shotgun and shoots it*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.0! wow i didnt know guns were allowed in here
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: you never asked ^.^
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: oh true
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *giggles*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: well i dont use guns i use knives*knife like claws erupt from her fingertips*
2004-12-07 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in* so.......bored...........I got a bunny
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: okay
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *stares at akira's fingertips* ooohh *looks at ronald* does the bunny taste good? ^.^
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *her hand returns to normal*
2004-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: who cares... I'm hungry... *walks toward the cute fluffy little bunny*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches amused*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *picks up her shotgun and looks at garfield* Leave the bunny alone
2004-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: fine... *sticks out his tounge* who runs this crummy diner anyway?! I would like to make a complai- uh, woops...
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie and laughs then laughs at garfield*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *sits down at the bar and lays down her shotgun down* 
2004-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: sorry, the termites were shipped over seas to fight in the war... in their place, we welcome... the bar roaches!
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *looks evily at the roaches and watches them run at garfiled*
2004-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: noooo!!! *gets eaten alive by roaches*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *watches amusedly*
2004-12-07 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] cuddles up to my bunney*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *sighs*
2004-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... here, in this wiki, I take the title of surpreme dictator! soon, I shall spread my malice to other wikis, until... the are all MINE!!! *cackles as a bolt of lightning flashes in the background*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *looks at garfiled weirdly then ignores him* Anyone thirsty? *walks over the bar and gets some coffee*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *looks at akira* thirsty?
2004-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *takes over Ð*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: yea sure
2004-12-07 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly falls asleep*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *gets akira a hot salty goblet of blood*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie*thanks...*drinks it all in one drink*
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: welcomes ^.^
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: ^_^
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *looks around* damn, there's nothing to drink here...
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *picks up the phone and orders pizza*
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: heh
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *sits and waits for her pizza* so what's up?
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: not much
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: ditto
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: yup
2004-12-07 [PixieStickChick]: *answers the door pays for her pizza and sits down to eat it* anyone want? ^.^
2004-12-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *smiles*
2004-12-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: mumble mumble...
2004-12-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up then turns her back to everyone*
2004-12-08 [kitteleentje]: hmm, i would like a [Beo-Wulf]'s finger. With a glass of blood please.
2004-12-08 [Acidic Khemica]: ......
2004-12-08 [Rick-P]: *hugs Khalo*Hi!^_^
2004-12-08 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at riku then smiles*hey riku
2004-12-08 [Rick-P]: How are you?
2004-12-08 [Acidic Khemica]: alright i guess
2004-12-08 [Rick-P]: *Still hugging you*I would kiss you but you might be embarrassed*
2004-12-08 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs alittle*why would i be?
2004-12-08 [Rick-P]: Becuase mister floor goblin....*Looks at the ground*
2004-12-08 [Acidic Khemica]: oh i thought i shot that little bastard!oh well you can live....for now*she looks at the floor goblin*
2004-12-08 [Rick-P]: *Laughs*
2004-12-08 [Acidic Khemica]: *smiles then watches the floor goblin run away*well now that thats over with
2004-12-08 [Rick-P]: *Kissess her*
2004-12-09 [Acidic Khemica]: *is taken by suprise then kisses him back*
2004-12-09 [Rick-P]: *Smiles*
2004-12-09 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*
2004-12-09 [Rick-P]: *Looks to see if that floor gblin was watching*If I could I would kill that thing...^_^
2004-12-09 [Acidic Khemica]: yea i would have done so already
2004-12-09 [PixieStickChick]: I'll kill him! ^.^ *follows the floor goblin around and corners him* Ha! I got him! *shoots him repeatedly and then walks of to the bar*
2004-12-09 [Beautiful darkness]: hay
2004-12-09 [PixieStickChick]: hello ^.^
2004-12-09 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*
2004-12-10 [Beautiful darkness]: hayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy whatz been going on????
2004-12-14 [sara(:]: megan!!!!! *tackles megan*
2004-12-15 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........
2004-12-15 [PixieStickChick]: o.O
2004-12-16 [Acidic Khemica]: yea............
2004-12-17 [PixieStickChick]: *glomps akira* Oops *nervous giggle*
2004-12-17 [Acidic Khemica]: *is glomped looks at pixie and grins she glomps pixie*
2004-12-17 [PixieStickChick]: Yay!! *dances around the room* do do dee da dooooo
2004-12-17 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2004-12-17 [PixieStickChick]: *dances past moon and waves*
2004-12-17 [sara(:]: *waves* *sits down at the bar*
2004-12-17 [PixieStickChick]: *dances behind the bar and stops in front of moon* want anything to drink? ^.^
2004-12-17 [Acidic Khemica]: *smiles slightly shaking her head laughing*
2004-12-17 [sara(:]: ummm...i'll have some of [Beo-Wulf]'s coffee plz....
2004-12-18 [PixieStickChick]: *hands moon some of [Beo-Wulf]'s coffee then turns and hops off* ^.^
2004-12-18 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits down*
2004-12-18 [PixieStickChick]: *hops behind the bar and stops in front of akira* thirsty?
2004-12-18 [Acidic Khemica]: no thank you
2004-12-18 [PixieStickChick]: okies! ^.^ *hops around the room*
2004-12-18 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks around*
2004-12-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: no harassing floor gremlin!!! he is our official spokesperson!
2004-12-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: if only he could talk...
2004-12-19 [PixieStickChick]: sorry the floor gremlin is dead
2004-12-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry... I just purchased a clone-o-matic! now we can have millions of floor gremlins!
2004-12-19 [PixieStickChick]: *pulls out shotgun and shoots the clone-o-matic*
2004-12-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry! I already used it to clone more clone-o-matics!
2004-12-19 [PixieStickChick]: *points shotgun at garfield* Get rid of them :D
2004-12-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: no can do... they're multiplyin' like bunnies...
2004-12-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: check out my new description!
2004-12-19 [PixieStickChick]: *lowers shotgun* damn
2004-12-19 [Acidic Khemica]: [i can....]
2004-12-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -run in and jumps on pixie- [hello...are you new?]
2004-12-19 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at white and shakes her head*
2004-12-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grins walking over to the bar-
2004-12-19 [Acidic Khemica]: *she looks around*
2004-12-20 [PixieStickChick]: Me? No, I'm not new... Though I haven't seen you in a while white
2004-12-20 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: this shack needs some repair...
2004-12-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: I haven't fixed it since ol' [swabloo] left...
2004-12-20 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I haven't fixed it since [Mortified Penguin] violated it at the top...
2004-12-20 [Acidic Khemica]: okay
2004-12-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: drats... we don't have a mechanic...
2004-12-20 [Acidic Khemica]: no we dont
2004-12-21 [PixieStickChick]: I know where you can find a mechanic ^.^
2004-12-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: at a mechanic shop?
2004-12-21 [PixieStickChick]: sorta
2004-12-21 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-21 [sara(:]: *walks in* great dustin changed his name....*sits down at the bar*
2004-12-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ya don't say...
2004-12-21 [sara(:]: shut up! *slaps him*
2004-12-21 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at them*be nice i dont want to have to get evil on people
2004-12-21 [sara(:]: *points to dustin* he started it!
2004-12-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: get evil? on people?! sicko!
2004-12-21 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she runs in and takles turkey- [are you new?] -she grins her eye teeth sharp. she stands and walks over to the bar-
2004-12-21 [Acidic Khemica]: *smacks forhead*he watches to much porn
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: newsa?! mesa manager!
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits down*
2004-12-22 [PixieStickChick]: Dustin wtf is with your friends telling me they got another password???
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: that was me... THEY FINALLY UNBANNED MY IP ADRESS!!!
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: now I can get on everyone's name that I know the password...
2004-12-22 [PixieStickChick]: Yay?? o.O
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles*
2004-12-22 [PixieStickChick]: if you get on my name, I'll kill you ^_^
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: mwa ha ha ha ha... *goes off to find out pixie's password*
2004-12-22 [PixieStickChick]: *glares at dustin*
2004-12-22 [Rick-P]: *Watches them*
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches back*
2004-12-22 [Rick-P]: *Looks at him*What?
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-22 [Rick-P]: Khalo!^_^*Hugs her*
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: *hugs riku*hey^_^
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitches*
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: my worst fear is that you people will get together and take over this wiki and kill me... it's called "paranoidthatpeoplewillkillyouandtakeoveryourwikiphobia"
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: uh no i dont kill people unless neccesary
2004-12-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... suuuuuure... that's what you want me to beleive!!!
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: whatever
2004-12-22 [Rick-P]: *Still hugging Khalo*????
2004-12-22 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs still hugging riku*
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: well maybe we wouldn't have to plot your downfall, if you didn't have freaky little creatures attacking us all the time
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: ^_^
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: hehe
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: how are ya? :)
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: alright
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey... tell it to the creatures... I'm not the one who controls em'
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: ^_^ *lights a match and plays with fire*
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches*pretty fire
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: watch out now... this place has burned down five times! (this week!)
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: *she looks at pixie*do you guys have anything strong to drink that is normal?
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: *still staring at the fire points her shotgun at dustin and shoots him*
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure... it's in the dungeon underground... every alchohol beverage imaginably...
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: *sighs* cause i need some
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey! that's the third time I've been shot! (today!)
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: hardly anything is normal here, but we could add it for ya
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: I've done!!!! Muahahahaha!!! I sucessfully cloned Bob's Diner!!! See!! Bobo's Diner
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: *huggles akira* hiya!!!
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: ^_^' hey pixie
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: hows you? ^_^
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: im good
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: good good *runs into a closet and jumps out in a monkey costume*
2004-12-23 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.0?
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's supposed to be Blob's Diner!
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: NO! Its BOBO!!
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: BLOB!!!
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: BOBO!!!!!
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]:
BLOB!!!!!
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]:
BOBO!!!!!! Stop arguing with me damn it!!
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]:
******* BLOB!!!! DARN YOU!!!!
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]:
BOBO!!!!! *SHOOTS YOU IN THE HEAD*
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cough* bl... ob... *cough*
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: SHUT UP! *shoots you again*
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: bl... *collapses*
2004-12-23 [Midnight Angel]: *looks around*wow um is this a bad time?^_^'
2004-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... just a routeen...
2004-12-23 [PixieStickChick]: *shoots dustin twice more just to be sure then looks up at angel and smiles* No, it's fine, you're just in time to see me take over of Bob's Diner!! Muahahahaha!!!!
2004-12-24 [Midnight Angel]: um okay i am going to stand over here....
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks out from the clone-o-matic* mwa ha ha ha ha!!! don't underestimate a psyco!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *fires randomly at chef steph*
2004-12-24 [Midnight Angel]: *makes a shield*things are going to get messy i see
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: pixie, if you surrender, don't write anything in here for another 5 minutes...
2004-12-24 [Midnight Angel]: okay odd
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets ready to click the delete button if she does*
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: damn it that's not fair!! My computer crashed!!!
2004-12-24 [Midnight Angel]: lol
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he he...
2004-12-24 [Midnight Angel]: wiers
2004-12-24 [Midnight Angel]: wierd
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: *glares at dustin* meanie!!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles*
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: new badge! and this one is actually legal!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: yay?
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: allright! [Pillowthief] fixed it!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: I just looked at the staff pics... BUTTHEAD?!!!
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: You notice now???? That's been there forever!!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: I never looked at it...
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: dork
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes?
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: Ewww!!!!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: Do you know what a dork is?
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... a stupid freak of nature?
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: HAHA! That's just what they want you to think!!!
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=dork&r=f   look at the first definition
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: "they" you say...
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!?!?!?!
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: HAHAHA!! DORK DORK DORK!!! rofl!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chokes pixie*
2004-12-24 [PixieStickChick]: Stop it you dork!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: new badge!
2004-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2004-12-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... anyone here?
2004-12-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: [ya me]
2004-12-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok then fella...
2004-12-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: [i'm a girl thank you] -she steps from the shadows-
2004-12-27 [Acidic Khemica]: ..............
2004-12-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... "fellaette"
2004-12-27 [sara(:]: lol
2004-12-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: i'm sure we're all LOAO but please -sits down at the bar-
2004-12-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits next to white*
2004-12-28 [nokaredes]: 'anything we can liquify in the blender' sounds like how I cook. :D
2004-12-28 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-29 [Hikage]: haha randomly delightful ^_^
2004-12-29 [Acidic Khemica]: yup
2004-12-29 [sara(:]: hello everyone
2004-12-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: not that talkative these days, are we?
2004-12-30 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2004-12-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm hmm...
2004-12-30 [Acidic Khemica]: eh im tired
2004-12-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: congratulations... you have your first guard note at the top of your house...
2004-12-30 [Acidic Khemica]: yes i know my sister's doing
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: wazzup eva one
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: nothing
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: wow same here
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: heh
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: *looks around* eating a piece of toast
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: Looks hopelessly into the abyss *eating piece of dead rat*
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.o?
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... [swabloo]'s gone... blood? you are our new publicist...
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: looks around wondering what was in that dead rat cause it tasted funny
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: any leftovers you may have, feed them to the floor gremlin... (a good friend of akiratetsuo)
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: oh shut up!
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: lol throws leftovers on floor
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: *she shakes her head and summons a chair to sit on*
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: *hey can you summon a bag of weed for me*
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: um sure*summons weed for blood*
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches the floor gremlin and the closet beast renact The Empire Strikes Back*
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: we have a floor gremlin! it's very annoying!
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: yes it is
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: greedy too >.<
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: yea
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: and your point is?
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: there's all kinds of annyoing things here *looks pointedly at turkey*
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: *sighs*
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: my point is you're not special :)
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah like the members *shakes his fist*
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, time for the weekly clicking of buttons...
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: *beep*
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: oh shit
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: I wonder if I would be able to get the comments back if I clicked DON'T SHOW COMMENTS...
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: you clicked don't show usernames and don't show time. just click show usernames and show time :) I think...
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: looks for rolling papers  thank you
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: now to see who said what...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: wtf did you do?? *rolls eyes*
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: no more comments time!
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: he screwed with the comments, of course!
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok ok... I'm done...
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: time to delete all my comments and make all of you look crazy!
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: I wonder if I can write comments by going back in the history...we'll see then!
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: j/k...
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: *claps hands* it worked! muahahahaha!!
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: hey dont you all need a rat catcher in the staff
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: don't worry. we all already look crazy!
2004-12-31 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: oh trust me! we NEED a rat catcher (hopefully one that'll take away turkey) ^_^
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mumbles*
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: who likes [Mortified Penguin]?!
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: depends on what you mean by "like"
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: hey can i be the rat and turkey catcher
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: turkey my butt... *shakes his wing*
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: Overthrow the turkey!! Muahahahaha!!!
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: you can always be the unofficial one without even asking...
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: maybe when you join...
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: *catches turkey in net while everyone beats turkey with pinyata stick*
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots pixie*
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: *smacks turkey*
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: why commit mutiny? when we could ban together and take over elftown! mwa ha ha ha ha!
2004-12-31 [Bringer of Nightmares]: cashier! gimme yer money...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: *shoots K_RO* Hmm... take over elftown... sounds fun
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: casey! oh well... not much of a loss...
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: I've been trying to find out [Hedda]'s password for a long time... or at least a guard's password... I know a patroller's though...
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: *naughty turkey* *if you find it out tell us to*
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey dokey...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: which patrollers?
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh...
2004-12-31 [lady nytmare]: this one...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: which patrollers pass do you know?
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: thought about starting a sub page of elfwood so i could steal all of hedda's passwords
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: you can do that?
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: yes just have to hack into elftown and create your own lil page and add some password snachers in it
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: why don't you change you password then?
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: I also know [Bringer of Nightmares]'s, [Mortified Penguin]'s, [El Asesino de pavos]'s, [Thorondor (the lord of the eagles)]'s, [radagast the brown]'s, [garfield the cat]'s, and some other people I forgot... I made a list...
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: try it blood...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: aren't [El Asesino de pavos] and [Thorondor (the lord of the eagles)] yours?
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: i will try  so what u all do for fun
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... thorondor is, but the other is [Mortified Penguin]'s brothers...
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: obvious password... QWERTY
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: same as their brother's...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: he's weird... o.O
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: I know [la vie lemon]'s, [Purroyo]'s [bringer of chaos]'s [Pedo pete]'s [pyroqueen69]'s [~And the wind calls her Demona~]'s [PhoenixStarfire]'s...pretty much my entire relation list actually ^_^
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: a more obvious password is password...the most common password.
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: nice collection... I used to know [sara(:]'s and [hellraiser]'s but they changed em'...
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: I used to know [Revolution] and [crazy loser stalker geek] but he changed them too >.<
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: garfield she's gotta be the stupidest patroller...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: it'd be funny to start a wiki with everyone's pass on it
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: I was just thinking about that! stop stealing my thoughts!
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: me too, darn it!!!
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: haha that's freaky
2004-12-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: I know my password too! well, see ya punks...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: wow specialness
2004-12-31 [bloodstonedragon]: laters gotta go watch tv
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: bai bai
2004-12-31 [nokaredes]: alright then...I guess everyone's leaving...
2004-12-31 [PixieStickChick]: I'm not
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: hello..?! *echoes* heloo...heloo...
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: hidey ho, ho!
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats a puppy*
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: *flies around the world seven times and reverses time and steals your puppy before you eat him*
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats a kitten*
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: *see above*
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: (except 'kitten' replaces 'puppy')
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats a mongolian killer armadillo baby*
2005-01-01 [bloodstonedragon]: looks for my order of toast with maggot soup
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... no waitress... well I guess I'll have too... LET YOU GET IT YOURSELF!!!
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR HAR!!!
2005-01-01 [bloodstonedragon]: lol ok but it's a 50 cent discount for self serving
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mumbles* I'm taking that out of pixie's paycheck...
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: a what?
2005-01-01 [nokaredes]: I'll waitress...
2005-01-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i want a #3 a #32 whole all from the lunch menu drink ill have 3 goat milks for desert ill have 6 n00b-a-la-bloods and for an appitizer ill have half a cracker thank you and if you couldd please place it in [bloodstonedragon]s tab id be grateful
2005-01-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: can do...
2005-01-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: =(^.^)=
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: HEY You will not take [bloodstonedragon]'s self serving discount out of MY paycheck! *mumbles and walks to the bar*
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: the TERMITE infested bar...
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: what?
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: *throws a bottle at turkey* Oh don't start!
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: tell it ta' the termites, sista!
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *looks around* wheres my food?!?!?!
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: Fine! I will! *glares at the termites and watches with satisfaction as they run at turkey*
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is protected by the multiplied floor gremlins*
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: *hands meryon a spatula and pushes her into the kitchen* knock yourself out!
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: *watches the floor gremlins fight the termites*
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hands pixie some popcorn* who needs a movie, when you can see live termite/ floor gremlin action...?
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: *places a bet on termites*
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: let's make this interesting... *throws in the clone-o-matic*
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: *anime fall* why?!?!?! aren't there enough termites and gremlins?!?!
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: are these the gremlins from the movie that multiply when you get them wet?
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *invents a new machine* *merges the termites and gremlins together with the merge-o-matic*
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: no...
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: how does that work for my bet? >.<
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... 50%?
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o...k.... *had no idea shed walked into a sci-fi soap opera* -.-'''
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh? you want fantasy?
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: it's something different every time ^_^ makes life interesting.
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: Places a bet on the gremlin/termite hybrid
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: is there anything else?
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: orders a rat on a stick bowl of maggots half a cracker and a fur burger with a side order of thighs Total please
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ummm.... *thinkls pixie will make blood cook it himself*
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: *thinks maybe he'll just eat it raw*
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *places a bet on all the imaginary people who are just standing around and who arent probably going to do anything*
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: *bets that blood will leave and find somewhere else to eat unless he wants the food to kill him*
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: *pays pixie 50 bucks to fix my food since she wont do it for regular price*
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: What do I look like to you a chef?
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: yep thats what it says up there ne ways lol
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *watches closely hopeing to see blood get his ass kicked*
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: lol love you to babygurl[Insaniac Yoshie]
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: *watches too*
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: *handcuffs blood to the wall and watches the floor gremlins attach him*
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: hell ya fuckin floor gremlins are the shit *watches blood run down body**very horny now* * anyone wanna fix what pixie has done*
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: *takes off the handcuffs and puts you into a room with fuzzy teddy bears*
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: lol wow thats fucked i would of rather you put me in a room with meryon
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: yea but you would have enjoyed that and I'm trying to torture you (in a way that you won't like it) ^_^
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: lol teddy bears are fun i have a big teddy bear i like to snuggle to it and i'm almost 20
2005-01-03 [PixieStickChick]: I have a snuggly purple unicron! ^_^
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: I have a purple fishy ^_^
2005-01-03 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs so hard she fell out of her chair*
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: why?! does my fishy embarrass you?
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: lol you guys are nuts
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: we know.
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: they are my followers...
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: we are...? we should start a club! I'll do the banner(s)...
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight... you do that...
2005-01-03 [Acidic Khemica]: no cause i came and see people talking about stuft animals
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: well what else are we supposed to talk about?
2005-01-03 [Acidic Khemica]: dunno
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why are we talking bout stuffed animals? (hsa a stuffed eeyore she cuddles with)
2005-01-03 [Acidic Khemica]: i dont know
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: i don know...
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: this wiki has 612 more visits than comments! get to talking, people!
2005-01-03 [Acidic Khemica]: ........................
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: well I can't just talk without a subject...
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: I know! let's talk about how there is no subject to talk about!
2005-01-03 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: I wrote a whole page in my english journal like that... it ended, "And so ends my discussion on how talking about talking about talking about talking about what I'm going to talk about is too complicated..."
2005-01-03 [nokaredes]: 'It says I need 2000 words but I can't really think of that much to say so I'll probably end up babbling...much like I'm doing now...'
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what?! no subject to talk about?! what kind of establishment is this?!?!?!?!?!
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: well i could start a subject [Insaniac Yoshie] but i think i would get my ass whopped for it
2005-01-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *glares and growls at blood* dont get me started....
2005-01-03 [bloodstonedragon]: dont worry babygurl i wont *huggles and kisses*
2005-01-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *ish still suspiciuos blood might tell* ok........
2005-01-04 [bloodstonedragon]: wishes you could come over tomorrow
2005-01-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: me to
2005-01-04 [bloodstonedragon]: think you need to bribe your mom into lettin ya come out
2005-01-05 [bloodstonedragon]: *looks for waitress* *wants to order supper*
2005-01-05 [PixieStickChick]: our waitor and waitress have been MIA for a while...
2005-01-05 [bloodstonedragon]: ya i noticed  so hows the cook tonight
2005-01-05 [PixieStickChick]: *looks around* who me?
2005-01-05 [bloodstonedragon]: ya u
2005-01-05 [PixieStickChick]: oh... I'm ok, I think...
2005-01-06 [Kanza]: *scoots over*..so wadja want for dinner?
2005-01-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-01-06 [PixieStickChick]: *glomps turkey*
2005-01-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: glomp... GLOMP?!
2005-01-06 [bloodstonedragon]: glomps all in room
2005-01-06 [nokaredes]: *glompies for all!!!*
2005-01-06 [bloodstonedragon]: so whats on the menu for lunch
2005-01-06 [PixieStickChick]: *licks turkey* muahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!
2005-01-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: wh- WHAT?!
2005-01-06 [nokaredes]: dude, lunch is over...try 'linner'
2005-01-06 [PixieStickChick]: what? I didn't do anything!! *innocent smile* Muahahahahahaha!!!!!
2005-01-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuurrrrrrrrrrreeeeeee...
2005-01-11 [nokaredes]: ^_^ it's been forever since someone wrote on this wiki...
2005-01-11 [PixieStickChick]: *snatches turkey's foot and hides*
2005-01-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeeey! it's a RABBIT'S foot that is luckey! Turkey feet cause death...
2005-01-11 [nokaredes]: guh...rabbits...*shivers*
2005-01-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: THE BUNNIES IS COMING!!! THE BUNNIES IS COMING!!! anyone watch Garfield and friends?
2005-01-11 [PixieStickChick]: *feeds turkey's foot to the floor gremlins*
2005-01-11 [nokaredes]: NO NOT THE BUNNIES!!! where'd I put that secret bomb shelter entrance...?
2005-01-14 [Nc-17]: uh huh... *eats ramen*
2005-01-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-01-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: french toast... tiddy boom!
2005-01-16 [nokaredes]: isn't french toast a breakfast food?
2005-01-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah...
2005-01-16 [nokaredes]: and up is down, and left is right, and ET troublemakers are Guards on EP, and we WILL HAVE FRENCH TOAST AT NIGHT!!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA*cough cough*
2005-01-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... reniD s'boB
2005-01-16 [PixieStickChick]: Just out of curiousity, how long has the same special been up?
2005-01-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: since 2004-12-04
2005-01-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: I do believe we need to hire a special changer...
2005-01-16 [PixieStickChick]: yes I think we really do need one.
2005-01-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-01-16 [nokaredes]: I like the special. ^_^
2005-01-16 [PixieStickChick]: I think that one fits best with the "food" served here lol
2005-01-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: THERE WAS ONCE A YELLOW LIGHTSABER!!! IT COULD CUT THROUGH OTHER LIGHTSABERS!!! THE JEDI DECIDED IT WAS TOO POWERFUL AND DESTROYED IT AND IT'S BLUEPRINTS!!! hello...
2005-01-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: sorry, I was bored...
2005-01-18 [nokaredes]: don't apologize--Star Wars rocks! ^_^
2005-01-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: YEAH!!!
2005-01-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: the revenge of the sith comes out may 19!!! and harry potter and the half blood prince comes out in june!!!
2005-01-18 [nokaredes]: I'm actually gonna see that in the movie theater. I hate movie theaters, but that there is enough motivation...
2005-01-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-01-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm gonna postpone my birthday for three months so I can watch it for my birthday...
2005-01-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: like harry potter?
2005-01-18 [nokaredes]: lol...and it depends on what the meaning of 'like' is. it's well written...
2005-01-18 [nokaredes]: hello all...
2005-01-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo pixie! wats up?!
2005-01-19 [PixieStickChick]: *looks up* I don't know but it's staring at me!! *hides behind turkey*
2005-01-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't mind him... he's just the new ceiling dweller...
2005-01-19 [PixieStickChick]: oh goodie *glomps turkey* hehehe
2005-01-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... WHO INVENTED THE WORD "GLOMP"?!
2005-01-19 [PixieStickChick]: idk but it was probably the same person who invented snogs
2005-01-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: SNOGS?! WHAT?!
2005-01-19 [PixieStickChick]: Muahahahahahahaha!!!! *snogs turkey*
2005-01-19 [nokaredes]: I like glompies and snogs...
2005-01-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Para todo usted miembros españoles.. ¡Bienvenido a Corta a Comensal, donde la única cosa peor que el alimento es el servicio! ¡Si usted quiere algún tocino, nosotros lo obtuvimos fresco! ¡Y el chico hace yo malo fresco! ¡Es todavía fuera espalda en el barro! ¡Goce bien su permanece hasta que usted se dé cuenta de lo que usted acaba de comer y se cae muerto! (y obtiene pone el menú)
2005-01-20 [PixieStickChick]: O.O I snogged a turkey....
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: were you high?
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: hey...the service isn't bad here! but I wouldn't know if the food kills...
2005-01-20 [PixieStickChick]: haha no! the turkey is just so sexy! *makes eyes at the turkey* hahahaha--- no... lol
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: did you know there's a Bob's Diner at Elfpack? now to figure out which one is Turkey...
2005-01-20 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i know a real bob here on elftown [jaderanger] hes umm.... neurotic
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: So... at least one of you could read that...
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: I've messaged everybody with the word "Bob" in their username to join Bob's Diner...
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: everyone?
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-01-20 [Insaniac Yoshie]: kewlness
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: everyone everyone? how do you know?
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: the "search" button...
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: o.O
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes your eye*
2005-01-20 [Insaniac Yoshie]: X.O wrong eye!!!!!!
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes the other eye*
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: well, it's kinda dark in this room...you can't blame him...*lights some candles* better!
2005-01-20 [Insaniac Yoshie]: X.X my eyes!!! my eyes!!!
2005-01-20 [nokaredes]: wha...?
2005-01-20 [bloodstonedragon]: *wishes for one of those impossible miracles *
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: wish? WISH?! corrupt a wish
2005-01-20 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2005-01-20 [bloodstonedragon]: wassup turkey long time no talk
2005-01-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: more like long time no smell...
2005-01-20 [bloodstonedragon]: ya that to but ne ways what you been up to
2005-01-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *walks in and kisses her baby on the cheek* hey matt i miss you and i love sooooooo much. i hope every thing works out ok
2005-01-22 [nokaredes]: how come some of the numbers are blank?
2005-01-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: I still haven't fixed it since [swabloo] left...
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: lazy turkey
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: why did her menu-thingies get deleted when she left?
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: idk but [swabloo] is a she ^_^
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: can I put my kittie on the list? he's pure evil, and will corrode your stomach, bit you can have him...he's under my chair right now trying to get my feet...and growling...
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: sure! and I'll take the kitty! I LOVE kitty's!!
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: they taste great! let's trade recipies...(hold on, I'll get a piccy)
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: this is my favorite piccy http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/drawing/97422_1102485560.jpg
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: OMG! What a cool pic!!
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: I know I got a pic of one of my other cats yawning on one of my recent rolls of film (I seem to bore my cats) but two of them came out blank, so I am afraid to try to get the others developed.
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: that's coolers! I miss my kitty! *pouts*
2005-01-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats kitty stew* hmm... could use potatoes...
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: *gasp* Bad turkey!! *smacks turkey* No eating kitty's!!!
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: no, no, eat the kittie.
2005-01-23 [PixieStickChick]: No kitty eating!!
2005-01-23 [nokaredes]: yes kittie eating!
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello everyone....How are you all?....Has anybody made an offer for my mom yet?
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: hey vamp! *looks though her pickets* I have some pocket lint and a paper clip... how's that for an offer?
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *apears*
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: [PixieStickChick] Trust me you dont want my mom. I have a picture of her.  I am the one in the sute. My mom is the one in the pink dress
2005-01-24 [nokaredes]: I want you...hehe
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: wow your moms a hottie! *cough cough* yea! *hides*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits her eyes glowing blue*interesting i come and people start talking about banging other people...interesting
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: *sits next to akira* must be the vibe you give
2005-01-24 [nokaredes]: yep.
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie*must be.........
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: [nokaredes] I am married to [Angelic nightmares]....[PixieStickChick] my mom is nasty....Are you sure you think she is hot?
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: *giggles and looks away* so what's up?
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: that was sarcasm
2005-01-24 [nokaredes]: I know that...she used to have the name Ronald Weasley...
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks*interesting what you hear in dinners
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: yea really *glomps akira* hehehe *dances around*
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: [nokaredes] Yes I know she changed it to [Angelic nightmares]
2005-01-24 [nokaredes]: well, I know you know...
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie*thats new last time i was at a dinner they asked me tea or blood not glomping or not.......*laughs*
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: hehehe well at least I didn't snog you ^_^
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: as did i
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: ok
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! I'm back!
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: oh joy we are all leaping wth joy *sits smirking her eyes still blue*
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: Welcome back [Sagacious Turkey] How have you been?
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: Dustin!! *snogs dustin*
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *has the ability to ban everyone from this wiki* but I need the members! YAY!
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *boogies*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs slightly to herself then looks at the wine glass in front of her and drinks it all*
2005-01-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] chases around [Sagacious Turkey]*
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: *sits in front of akira looking at her with her head tilted to the side*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie*you need something?
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pecks lonesome's eye*
2005-01-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites the turkeys wing*
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: *giggles* nope, just wanna look at ya
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: okay......*she had leather gloves on stained with blood along with a long sleved black shirt and a cape touching the ground she summoned another wine glass and drank the blood in it*
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: *pulls out a notepad and takes notes*
2005-01-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *curls up in a ball and goes to sleep*
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: aww nighty night woflie ^_^
2005-01-24 [Beo-Wulf]: *Cuddles up to [Angelic nightmares] And slowly falls asleep*
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ＊ｐｌａｙｓ ｗｉｔｈ ｖａｒｉｏｕｓ ｆｏｎｔｓ＊
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: O.O
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ｙａｙ！ ｗｉｄｅ ｆｏｎｔｓ！！！
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: whatever *walks to a chair and sits down*
2005-01-24 [nokaredes]: *gives you all wedgies*
2005-01-24 [PixieStickChick]: *throws a knife at nokaredes*
2005-01-24 [nokaredes]: *dodges knife, pantzes Pixie*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches them highly amused*
2005-01-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *stretches and licks her masters cheek to wake him up*
2005-01-24 [sara(:]: *walks in and picks up a knife and looks at it*.....*puts it in her pocket then sits down*
2005-01-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: White: -walks ina nd walks by moon sliping the knife from her pocket and sits down at the bar putting it behind the conter-
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks then summons another glass of blood her eyes wicked blue she picked up the glass and drank some of it*
2005-01-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: White: -waves her hand a glass of blood her own kind appears she too drinks it-
2005-01-24 [sara(:]: *shrugs* ah it's not like i don't have more*wanders into the back*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches amused*
2005-01-24 [sara(:]: *comes back out tossing a knife in the air and catching it and sits back down*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *listens and hears an organ playing she stands up*[where have i heard that before......]*she starts walking*
2005-01-24 [sara(:]: *watches still tossing her knife in the air and catching it*
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *she stops walking at listens as it fades away*
2005-01-24 [sara(:]: *stares at her knife as she throws it and catches it* that was interesting....
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at moon*what was interesting.......?
2005-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... that man-eating chicken behind your head?
2005-01-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *grins and her eyes go red and takes out her daggers and in a swift strike she cuts off the head and walks back to her seat she sits down and drinks from her glass*
2005-01-25 [Angelic nightmares]: ....................
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-01-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at him*what?
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... MORE CHICKENS!!! *watches as a gang of angry chickens (dressed in leather and chains) burst in and order some roasted n00bs*
2005-01-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes her head*
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sigh* chickens these days...
2005-01-25 [sara(:]: *throws the knife at dustin*
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: shhh... you'll upset the chickens... *watches as the chickens shake their fists at [sara(:]*
2005-01-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -catches the knife now standing between moon and dustin- [now now kids if you can't kill each other quickly] -she throws the knife at bob- [don't kill at all] -she walks over to the bar and sits down-
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *laughs as Bob screams and collapses*
2005-01-25 [nokaredes]: chickens have fists?
2005-01-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... don't ask me, ask the angry chickens... *they glare across the room*
2005-01-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at the chickens and smile- [oh look it's a walking buffa!!] -she stands and shifts into her wolf form running after the chickens-
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: holy crap! those comments were posted at the exact same time!!! *celebrates*
2005-01-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -bites on of the chickens in half and looks at turkey- [you are such a strange one] -she spits the half chicken out and walks back to the bar once more in elf form-
2005-01-25 [nokaredes]: eeew...you're just gonna leave it there? *cleans up the chicken mess* *gets attacked by the other chickens*
2005-01-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- [you are getting you ass kicked by a bunch of bitch chickens that's too much] -she laughs harder-
2005-01-25 [nokaredes]: hey, I said attacked, not gets ass kicked
2005-01-25 [sara(:]: *walks over and gets the knife out of bob and wipes it off* slow deaths r better....
2005-01-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs again- [still funny hahahah] -giggles then looks at moon nodding- [oh yes silly me]
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: did you know this wiki's password is KITTY?
2005-01-25 [sara(:]: what a surprise.....
2005-01-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-01-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks out of the fire in her wolf form* kitty? real typical turkey.....
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight... new name...
2005-01-26 [Beo-Wulf]: I want to get my toung and eyebrow pierced....But [Angelic nightmares] Tells me not too.....
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: Yeah Turkey.......I got a new name...I'm prolly gonna stick with this one tho......
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: what was your name before?
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: [Lonesome Lover] and before that [Ronald Weasley]
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: oh, you. quit changing your name!
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: i will......I'm gonna stick with this one
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: good. (or I'll sic the chickens on you!)
2005-01-26 [Beo-Wulf]: LoL
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: *growls at the chickens* I'll pull an Ozzy and bite there heads off if I have too
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: *the chickens attack*
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: THE CHICKENS ARE COMING, THE CHICKENS ARE COMING!!!
2005-01-26 [Beo-Wulf]: LOL
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites the heads off the chickens as they come close to me*
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: *the chickens number too many, and they swarm over you like ants*
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps up in her masters arms*
2005-01-26 [Beo-Wulf]: Takes [Angelic nightmares] Away from the damn chickens
2005-01-26 [Angelic nightmares]: *plays with her pet mouse*
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches intrigued*
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chicken return to the counter and order a fresh round of crickets... a-la-blood*
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes her head*idiots......
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: idiots, you say... and whom are we refuring to?
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: the chickens
2005-01-26 [Beo-Wulf]: Damn those fucking chickens
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens all stand up and start walking toward akiratetsuo*
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *stares at the ground her eyes going black*
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens order akiratetsuo some turkey milk and sit down to chat*
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at them*odd.............
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: wow, look at all the lovely conversations I missed while I was gone...
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: picture of one of the chickens: 
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: image hosted by tripod...?
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh...
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: wha?
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: I can't see the picture...can anyone else?
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: *sits down*
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: hold on... I'll upload it...
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: good...you do that.
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: ya think u shoul've done that earlier?
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]:  naw...
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: ^_^
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: ^_^ that's family guy....i love that show
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: me too...I can listen to it on my new CD player now, when I'm not at home ^_^
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... have you seen the episode this happens in?
2005-01-26 [nokaredes]: probably...
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: yup...sure have
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he... he beat up the chicken...
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: riiiiiiiight
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: he he he...yeah i no
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits*
2005-01-26 [dark starlight]: hey...
2005-01-26 [sara(:]: it's jamie!
2005-01-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight... *smacks nokaredes in the head* don't drink in the library! *hands some messy chocolate cake* eating is much more effective!
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: .................
2005-01-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -appears at one of the tables-
2005-01-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits and doesnt say anything she drinks some of the blood in her glass*
2005-01-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats a turkey sandwich*
2005-01-27 [nokaredes]: ah, but now the keyboard is all sticky with Mountain Dew...you cannibal!
2005-01-27 [Angelic nightmares]: Theres a turkey.....eating a turkey sandwich.............now thats differant
2005-01-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-01-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites turkeys leg* Your eating your own kind!!!!
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches intrigued*
2005-01-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles at [Acidic Khemica]*
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: *Watches them in his small bird form*........
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at wiccan wolf then looks away and turns she was wearing a black tanktop and black pants she had black leather gloves on she walked to a table and sat down then put her feet up on the table and leaned back*
2005-01-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens burst in through the doors and pick a fight with the floor gremlins*
2005-01-27 [nokaredes]: who's [Rick-P]?
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: O.O*Riku watched this still in his robin bird form*
2005-01-27 [nokaredes]: who ARE you?
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *she watched them and shok her head looking at the ground*
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: *Changes to his elf form*Hehehe.The name is Riku.^_^'*Jumps off the wooden bar that was connected the roof landing next to [Acidic Khemica]*
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at riku but says nothing*
2005-01-27 [nokaredes]: well, I know that already...I was asking because you just showed up out of knowhere and you act like you know us...
2005-01-27 [nokaredes]: oh and *floor gremlins win*
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: I don't know you or you guys.*Looks at Akira*What's wrong?
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes head*nothing........
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: Oh come on I know something is wrong.*Walks in front of her then his face gets close to hers*Tell me or I will do the face.^_^
2005-01-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens use their cell phones to call the turkeys*
2005-01-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... she's always like that...
2005-01-27 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: nothing...im fine riku*stands up*
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: I warned you.*Turns into a cute kitten and moews*
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at the cat then walks away from it and sits in a corner*
2005-01-27 [sara(:]: i hate cats....*walks over to the bar and sits down*
2005-01-27 [Rick-P]: *Turns back*She resisted my kitten face!O.O
2005-01-27 [Acidic Khemica]: *sighs and leans her head against the wall and looks at them*
2005-01-27 [sara(:]: _> y r u looking at me?
2005-01-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *looks at [sara(:]*
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: how did the chickens get a cell phone plan? (*looks at [sara(:]*)
2005-01-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs as [Rick-P] tries to get [Acidic Khemica] to tell him whats wrong* Shes always acts like that. You get used to it after a while.....
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *stares at the ground her eyes slowly change to black*
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: *a fire breathing chicken stomps into the room*
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at it*what is it with this place and chickens?!
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: it's our theme...I guess. *it is the leader of the chicken gang*
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes her head*interesting
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey... what about the floor gremlins... the closet beasts... the wall sludge... the man-eating slugs... the stove cretins...
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at him*i was getting there.......
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *steals a bowl of ramen*
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: *the giant chicken roasts the floor gremlins* *the closet beasts don't come out of the closets* *the wall sludge is sludgey* *gets bored and doesn't fini
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks his head*
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! akira! STOP STEALING ART!!!
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey too*
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: sweet... silver surfer was infected by the carnage symbiote...
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: o.O you're watching Doug?
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: what?!
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: will people stop telling me that it wasnt me it was my cousin i let her on my sn and she fucked it up
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: mebe you should write that in your description...
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: i will sometime
2005-01-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *ish totally lost in what were talking bout*
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*
2005-01-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ~_O *ish luaghed at* huh?
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: nothing
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen*
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: what is with you and ramen?
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *summons a glass of blood then sips it*
2005-01-28 [nokaredes]: I wish I had ramen...
2005-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws ramen at you*
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: *watches*
2005-01-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ramen reminds me of nc-17...
2005-01-28 [Acidic Khemica]: you people are odd
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: *catches the ramen (but isn't allowed to eat it in the lab)*
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why am i odd?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *takes another sip of the blood in her glass then looks up as her eyes go black*it's just an expression i say to everyone dont be offended
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh im not affnded! i already knew i was odd >.O i just wanted to why this time
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *she sighs and looks around then takes another sip of the blood*
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *thinks about whether she should recite "1 fish 2 fish red fish blue fish" or "green eggs and ham"*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *her eyes were pitch black*
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i think ill do both... here goes...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: oh joy......*she props her feet up on the table*
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 1 fish 2 fish red fish blue fish black fish blue fish old fish new fish this one has a little star this one has a little car say! what a lot of fish there are Yes some are red and some are blue some are old and some are new some are sad and some are glad and some are very very bad why are they sad an glad and bad? i do not know go ask your dad
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: what?!?!
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pheonix*you are seriously to obssesed with children songs
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: [wow scary you know that...] -she appears sitting beside of aki-
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at white as she sips her drink*[hello white......]
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: its not a song its a book and these 2 happen to be the first one i ever read by myself
2005-01-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i am sam. sam i an. that sam i am. that sam i am i do not like that sam i am. do you like green egges and ham? i do not like green eggs and ham i do not like them sam i am. would you like them here or there? i would not like them here or there. i would not like them anywhere. i do not like green eggs and ham i do not like them sam i am. would you eat them in a house? would you eat them with a mouse? i do not like them in a house i do not like them with a mouse. i do not like them here or there i do not like them any where. i do not like green eggs and ham i do not like them sam i am
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -nods her own hello and waves her hand getting her own drink of blood- [how are you aki?]
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *smiles sitting down her glass*[let's just say im in a better mood than yesterday]*licks her blade*
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -nods in understanding and smiles watching ashes- [i miss dark..] -her voice trails off-
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: dark?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at her*[dark.........?]
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: [why do you miss him?]
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -nods again then looks at aki- [you know at the wolf army madiens old mate....because he came then left agian because he thought that he was just a wast of time but he wasn't and i couldn't change his mind] -she looks down-
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *nods*[yea but why do you miss him he tried to kill me so many times]
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at her- [you could say that in a way maiden and i are bound to him...so what she feels i feel what he feels i feel....AND I HATE IT!] -she growls-
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes head*[i dont miss him at all.......he hated me...]
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she laughs- [well i think what is really getting to me is the fact that my friends keep leaving....one...after...one...and i can't stop them no matter how hard i try] -she growls again and tilts her drink to her mouth getting a large drink of the red liqued-
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at her then sips her glass*[ i guess you could say people get to emotionally attached to each other.....]
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -slams her glass down angraly- [i know and it's just a foolish mortal emotion....a guradian shouldn't feel this way]
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at her*[im a guardian........i got attached to people and so did kira......kai is now 6 years old ^_^]
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she smiles then sighs- [i know but it's just a weight emotions are....]
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *nods*[yea it does happen....]*takes a drink of the blood in the glass then slams it down*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the glass shatters* you're gonna pay for that...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks and takes another glass and it breaks in her hand the pieces of glass sticking out of her hand and her hand was bleeding*you mean this?
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... of course not... I meant the air...
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, yes... you broke the air...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs and looks at her hand bleeding*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... you could use that as a refill...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: i could.......thats true
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: but nooooooo... you had to kill your glass...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: you are confuseing me............
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]:  what think?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: um it's okay i dont know what it is......
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: it might be a picture...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: no really?
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hah
2005-01-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at the guy and grins her teeth sharp and pointy- [it looks as if he saw me on a bad day hehehe]
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks*
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: I like it, it's good. do you have any more?
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... not really... more that aren't uploaded yet...
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: yea...uploading is the worst...I usually do it in bulk, then complain about bloody fingers ^_^
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: hitmen united- here ya go... [Mortified Penguin]'s only wiki...
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: fa shizzle ma nizzle, yo!
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: uh huh.....
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: *walks around aimlessly*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hey pixie
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: HEY!!! *glomps akira*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.0 ^_^ hey
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: how are ya?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: im okay ^_^ you
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: seriously tired but looking forward to tomorrow ^_^
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: cool
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *glomps pixie*
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: *snogs turkey*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: what's tomorrow?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: dont know
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: Saturday!!! and I have a date ^_^ hehehe
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... *the chicken gang stares enviously*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: um... ok... lol
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: sorry lol
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: who's the chicken gang? *blinks*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: the Giant fire-breathing one is the leader ^_^
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.0?
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: *sits in a chair* stupid chickens
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *nods*
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: *the chair eats Pixie*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the termites eat the chair*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gremlins eat the termites*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens eat the gremlins...*
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: *the monkeys attack turkey*
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: monkeys? monkeys are too traditional...
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: try Fred. Fred like pina coladas and getting caught in the rain.
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: heh
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Fred? Is he not into yoga? does he have half a brain? Does he like making love at midnight? In the dunes of the cape?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: i am confused
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Is he not much into health food? Is he into champagne?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: who is fred?
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]:  <---Fred. (ET wasn't letting me upload his pic for a minute there >.<)
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: lol!!
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: I do believe Bob's Diner has a new mascot...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: yay finally
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: wootwoot!
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sends pixie's frog on the "walk of shame"*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: 
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: interesting
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *goes off to add several recent badges to the badge list*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: *goes off to get a cold cold pack*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Badges
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: everyone stopped talking...
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: hey my frog wasn't that bad! lol
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: yea......
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: you're always on, aren't you?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: i guess you could say that
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: interesting...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: yes
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: no
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hah
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: and [nokaredes] is always on...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hehe
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ｕｈ ｈｕｈ．．．
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: except for the 3 hours a night I use for sleep...
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ｏｏｏ．．． ３ ｗｈｏｌｅ ｈｏｕｒｓ？！ Ｉ ｏｎｌｙ ｇｅｔ ２．．．
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hah
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: what's with the boxes?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ｉ’ｍ ｇｕｅｓｓｉｎｇ ｙｏｕ ｃａｎ’ｔ ｒｅａｄ ｔｈｉｓ ｆｏｎｔ， ｈｕｈ？
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters*
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: O.o
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hah!'
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: doesn't your mood say you're leaving?
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: hmm...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-01-29 [nokaredes]: *smoke pours from her ears as she tries to figure out how [Acidic Khemica] is here and asleep at the same time* >.<
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: who said im sleeping?
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: oooooooookkkkkkkkkkkk...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: -.-
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes akira*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: hey.........*glares*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens come crashing in*
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes head*not them again
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: pixie's on...
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: ahh a stalker!! *hides behind akira*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: what?!?!
2005-01-29 [PixieStickChick]: meep! O.O
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: moop!
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at pixie*
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... it's boring again...
2005-01-29 [Acidic Khemica]: uh huh
2005-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/wiki.html?n=1107054406&;name=Bob%27s%20Diner
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2005-01-30 [nokaredes]: WTF?
2005-01-30 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: Have any of you played Dynasty warriors?
2005-01-30 [Acidic Khemica]: no
2005-01-30 [nokaredes]: me either
2005-01-30 [Acidic Khemica]: heh
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: Darn
2005-01-30 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: Owell
2005-01-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ~_O looks like some one got bored...
2005-01-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Wow...[Sagacious Turkey]
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-01-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: or is that some secret code for something turky?
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, it does have a "secret word" in it...
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: Have any of you played Dynasty Warriors?
2005-01-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: does it actually say something or was it just cencered?
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: the "message" is in the older comments now... and no one has played Dynasty Warriors...
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: you never know.>.<
2005-01-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: iv played it.... once... just once...
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: okay.^_^I made a wiki of it.
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: would it perchance be called Dynasty Warriors?
2005-01-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i knew this guy... he was obsessed wth it... played it 24/7 literally hed never put it down...
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ｃａｎ ａｎｙｏｎｅ ｒｅａｄ ｔｈｉｓ ｆｏｎｔ？
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ｂｏｂ'ｓ Ｄｉｎｅｒ
2005-01-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wtf?
2005-01-30 [Beo-Wulf]: is sup? the secret code [Sagacious Turkey]?
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: not very "secret codeyful" now, is it?
2005-01-30 [Beo-Wulf]: umm...Sorry about that...
2005-01-30 [Ikko]: yeah that's what it is called.^-^
2005-01-31 [Tapestry of Destiny]: where's Fred?
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: 
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: omg it sooooo cute!!!!! *huggles cute tiger bunny*
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... tiger bunny... *eats*
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: NUUU!!!!!!!! *beats turkey with a wet noodle* no eating the tiger bunny!!!! bad turkey!!! bad!!!!
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, that is my name...
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ~.O are you enjoying this turkey?
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: why yes, yes I am...
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh... well in that case... *continues beating turkey with a wet noodle*
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2005-01-31 [Acidic Khemica]: *apears*
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: a wet noodle?
2005-01-31 [Acidic Khemica]: hn?
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats some hardened milk*
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hardend milk? ewwwww...........
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: -_-"
2005-01-31 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes her head*
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: *beats Turkey with hardened milk, then uses a wet-nap to clean her hands*
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *hands nok some bleach* this might work better......
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: no, bleach is for bloodstains only...thanks though!
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *shoots randomly at people*
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: *walks over to the bar and sits down*
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *ducks* that was nearly my boob you hit!!!!
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: *goes down (and doesn't have to go to class)*
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: better get a more padded bra then....
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: leather ^_^
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... I hear they're making them out of mithril nowadays...
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: :D
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oooOOooo wouldnt that be something for th e guys to see when they take off your shirt?
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: :D
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: theyd end up hurting them selves to if they tried to give you a titty twister.....
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: erm...yea...
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: ^-^
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: 0_0
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: do we need the bleach yet?
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why would we need the bleach yet? wheres the blood?
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: *chalk outlines self (after she remembers she's dead)*
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh..... i see.....
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: *spills some blood on the floor* right there is some
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: scroll up...you'll see...
2005-01-31 [nokaredes]: lol
2005-01-31 [sara(:]: so...is ne1 gonna clean that up?
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope...
2005-01-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: someone should really clean that up before someone slips or something....
2005-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: fo shizzle, ma nizzle!
2005-02-01 [Nc-17]: uh huh... *eats ramen*
2005-02-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: omg!!!! its back!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-01 [Nc-17]: IT?!?! *pimp slap*
2005-02-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: O.O i aint your bitch!!!! and i meant it in a good way!!!!!
2005-02-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: there's a good way?
2005-02-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dunno...is there?
2005-02-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smells a pixie* *glomps [PixieStickChick]*
2005-02-01 [Acidic Khemica]: *apears sitting in a chair she had a glass of blood in her hand and a body on the table*
2005-02-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the table catches on fire*
2005-02-01 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits there still*
2005-02-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *you catch on fire* mmm... charbroiled...
2005-02-01 [Acidic Khemica]: *stands up on fire then the fire disapears*
2005-02-01 [PixieStickChick]: O.O I was glomped by a turkey.....
2005-02-01 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits down and looks at the body*aw now look what you did you spoiled my dinner*
2005-02-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-01 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-02-01 [PixieStickChick]: *blinks* did I miss something?
2005-02-01 [nokaredes]: my body? they dragged me off to class, the wankers >.< stupid class...
2005-02-01 [Tapestry of Destiny]: lol
2005-02-01 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink* hello random person...
2005-02-01 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-02-01 [Angelic nightmares]: EVERYONE!!! please go to Wiccan And Vamp's Pets and lemme know what you think by leaving a comment
2005-02-01 [nokaredes]: *laughs at Turkey here too*
2005-02-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters... again...*
2005-02-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! NO ONE HAS COMMENTED ALL DAY!!! THAT'S IT!!! YOU'RE ALL FIRED!!!
2005-02-03 [nokaredes]: YOU CAN'T FIRE ME!! I QUIT!!
2005-02-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh well... YOU CAN'T QUIT!!! YOU'RE HIRED!!! that'll learn ya...
2005-02-03 [nokaredes]: hired as what...?
2005-02-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... "knucklehead"?
2005-02-03 [nokaredes]: oh, thanks...
2005-02-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-02-03 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey* that was sarcasm!!
2005-02-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes head very slowly*
2005-02-03 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits*
2005-02-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks for a moment, then walks off to a dark corner*
2005-02-03 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at wiccan wolf*
2005-02-03 [Beo-Wulf]: What's wrong [Angelic nightmares]?
2005-02-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes her head and curls up in a ball*
2005-02-03 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] Whats wrong?....What are you thinking?
2005-02-03 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at wiccn wolf then at gothic vampire and shakes her head*
2005-02-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up at her master* I told you nothings wrong
2005-02-03 [Beo-Wulf]: Alright....I loves you...*Gives You a kiss*
2005-02-03 [Acidic Khemica]: people these days
2005-02-03 [Angelic nightmares]: *smiles slightly*...............*sighs*...........I just really want to see you. And I'm hopeing that your dad will let you come over
2005-02-03 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes I hope that my dad lets me come over today....I loves you so much baby....I want to see [The Wedding Date] With you tomorrow
2005-02-03 [Angelic nightmares]: ok....We can go see that movie
2005-02-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... I'll come over too...
2005-02-03 [Acidic Khemica]: .......................
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: would someone else nominate bob's diner on wiki nominations? I've been nominating it the past few months, but noooooo...
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: AKIRATETSUO!!! I KNOW YOU'RE ON!!! WHY AREN'T YOU COMMENTING?! just wondering... aloud...
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks and walks out of the shadows*of course im here
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... go nominate bob's diner...
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: uh huh...............right.............
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey! you can't "uh huh" me! that's my job!
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: i just did
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: how... dare... you!
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: i dare!
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *a group of gay cows come crashing through the window* "Did we hear someone playing Truth or Dare?!"
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: *shakes her head*god this place and animals!*throws her hands in the air*
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *reads akira's house* ooo! ooo! I've messed with [gothicmoo] before! I wonder why he's on my friends list though... *scratches his head* he refused to join bob's diner...
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: because we use "$" instead of "£"...
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: hah good for him!
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... did [Mortified Penguin] bring you here?
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: i think so..............
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn him... *shoots [Mortified Penguin]*
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... *eats [Mortified Penguin]'s ramen*
2005-02-04 [Acidic Khemica]: whatever
2005-02-04 [nokaredes]: you should use "$" and "£"...
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have "£" and "¥"... mostly "$" though...
2005-02-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-02-04 [nokaredes]: what happened to this wiki? it just...died.
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! THIS WIKI CAN'T DIE!!! IT'S IMMORTAL!!! HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: que pasa?!
2005-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh??
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: (what's up?!)
2005-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Is that spanish?
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: just ignore him...
2005-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,I can speak a little spainish but not alot.
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: well, it's the first time he's ever spoken Spanish here, so don't worry about it ^_^
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, it's spanish... *the gang of chickens kick down the door*
2005-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Gang of chickens?!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: yes, gang of chickens...the one with the giant fire breathing one as its leader (*the gang takes Turkey hostange for not having chicken in his name*)
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: *they tie him to a chair*
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: *they gag him because he won't stop saying what?!*
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: I said: *they gag him because he won't stop saying what?!*
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *muffled* wht?!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: *laughs at Turkey*
2005-02-05 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *the chickens take [nokaredes] hostage, tie her to a chair, and gag her*
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: mmf?! o.o
2005-02-05 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *laughs at [nokaredes]*
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: mmf?! o.o
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: *takes gag off* all you did was add a bunch of spaces!
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: and where's my 'Knucklehead' title? hmm? HMM?!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: that's better.
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [Sagacious Turkey] Me and [Angelic nightmares] Had worked here for some time now....When do we get our paychecks?
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... LOOK! A MONKEY!
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [Sagacious Turkey].......Me and [Angelic nightmares] Had worked here for some time now....When do we get our paychecks?
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: hey...that's right...I work here now, officially...when do I get my paycheck??
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [nokaredes] How do you make the text bold?
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Can we have our paychecks please!!!!!
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: do you know how to do italics? it's the same, except you put b instead of i.
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: how do I do....italics?
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: the word and it shows up the word. the word which'll be the word.
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Cool Yay I did it....Thank you
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: underline, and 
huge
 are also around, floating, creepily...
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: ok
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: [nokaredes] Do you know how to change the text color to blue?
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: no, you have to be a donor to ET to do that
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: only 4 of you people exist on CatHug!!
2005-02-05 [Beo-Wulf]: Well that sucks....What other cool things can you do to the text?.....We need to get our paychecks soon....Am I Right?
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: erm...I don't know. I mean, I probably do know, I just don't feel like sharing. I don't like that technical stuff. (*accuses [Sagacious Turkey] of being [(insert name here)] of EP*)
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: [Angelic nightmares], [Beo-Wulf], [sara(:], [spitfire_35121], [Mortified Penguin]/[Sir Soapy]/[n-c17], [Bringer of Nightmares], [hellraiser], [silvermoon dragon] and [Acidic Khemica], I order you to go to www.cathug.com and sign up!! *uses mind-control powers*
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]:
you forgot the "pre" text... the one I used for the top of this page...
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: [hellraiser] and [Mortified Penguin] are banned...
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: but they both have new names...
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is [garfield the cat] on cathug*
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: well you don't know how to show the tag, so :p
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: haha, I didn't put you on the list.
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure I do! you put that qzx thing or whatever between there somewhere...
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: uhh...no. it's <> (watch it dissapear)
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: lol...it did...hold on, I can make it show up...<>
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: err...maybe not. ! u Q t ! without the spaces.
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: that's the thingy I was talking about!
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: I've been fiddling with the cathug B's D...
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: I can tell.
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: I just found out another member of Bob's Diner's password...
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: that's four from B's D...
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: mine? no, I would have been kicked off...
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: no, [spitfire_35121]'s...
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: good. you won't figure mine out. (yes, that is a challenge)
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's a "challenge"?! *goes off to try out the word challenge*
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: yes...*slaps Turkey in the face with a glove*
2005-02-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: a glove?! *goes off to try "glove"*
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey with a dictionary*
2005-02-05 [Misty Air]: Who the heck is Bob?
2005-02-05 [nokaredes]: erm...I don't know...[Sagacious Turkey] might, except he just vanished.
2005-02-06 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2005-02-06 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2005-02-06 [Nc-17]: uh huh......*eats ramen*....
2005-02-06 [Nc-17]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight........booooooooooring.......*eats ramen*......this ramen could use some naruto.......
2005-02-06 [Nc-17]: B'S D?!?!?!?!..........riiiiiiiiiight.......
2005-02-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! WHY MUST YOU BE BACK?! WHY GOD, WHY?!?!?!
2005-02-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh calm down turkey...... *hands turkey a bowl of ramen* eat up ^_^
2005-02-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: good idea... here chavez! come and get the ramen! *throws the bowl of ramen in the middle of traffic* fetch boy!
2005-02-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: runs in and jumps on turkeys back howling-
2005-02-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh heh... ol' lard belly gots a new ip address...
2005-02-06 [nokaredes]: sad...they keep banning you and you won't go away...
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: .......
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: okay...............almost nobody here remembers me.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: i do
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: riiiiiiiight........*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: maybe i do and maybe i dont
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i do... i rember you from like 50 of the wikis im in... it was always stuff like "HEY PROSTITUTES!!" or *eats ramen*
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: hey,punk,you got a problem with hookers or ramen?....*eats ramen*...
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: .................
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: no i didnt say i had a problem with them i just said thats what i remember :P
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: oh.......okay.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: I don't know you...you were banned before I got here.
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hey nc you ever try edible underwear? i hear its healthier for you than ramen
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: hey, go here... http://thesurrealist.co.uk/slogan.cgi?word=Allie ...only put your own word ^_^
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: .....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *hands nc edible undies* here try it! their cherry.....
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: i hear that edible underwear is like candy......*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: mmmmm......cherry...........popping.......
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: -.-*sits in a corner*
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: bleh...cherry...
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hmmm.... i wouldnt know... iv never tried them...
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: well, I mean bleh...cherry because cherry never tases good in anything...I've never eaten edible underwear, because, of course, I'm not ooollllddd enough to buy some. ><
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*...
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: does anyone belong to CatHug...?
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: nope
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i do but i havent been there since i joined bc there was like only 49 members total
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: nuh uh.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: i don't know why my ''eats ramen'' saying bothers people.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: well, there's at least 800 now...I'm member number 362 and one of the official peoples...I therefore made another ID on another computer to just screw around on hehe
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: I also made the CH Bob's Diner...new and improved, with fixed numbers!!
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: it doesnt bother me. i mean its your trade mark thingy. i just block it out or imagin it as jello or sushi or some person i hate that your eating
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: *eats ramen* annoys some people b/c you say it in every wikicomment you make...I'm used to annoying people so most stuff that annoys people doesn't annoy me...
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: i gotta go......gonna go search for crap on the internet........just got windows xp pro installed!.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: I hate Windows XP...I have Windows XP Student and it bites like a rabid monkey...
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: kewlness
2005-02-07 [PixieStickChick]: wow people are actually on
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: ...........*sits there*populus amuse mihi adeo*laughs*
2005-02-07 [PixieStickChick]: *sits next to akira and looks at her confused*
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: hello
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight... RAMEN!!! *twitch* MUST KILL RAMEN!!! *shoots randomly into the room*
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: *dies again* JUST HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU PEOPLE GONNA KILL ME?!?!
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: as many as it takes for you to stay dead i guess.... but then i dont know ne thing...
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: .......................
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: oh, thanks...
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: dont mention it :)(: just remember its not me kill you
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: you're right...it was Turkey...*gets a hitman to whack him*
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Four out of Five Dentists Recommend Bob's Diner.
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: but what about the fifth Dentist?
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: he was hit in the head by a clipboard...
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Lipsmackin' Thirstquenchin' Acetastin' Motivatin' Goodbuzzin' Cooltalkin' Highwalkin' Fastlivin' Evergivin' Coolfizzin' Bob's Diner.
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: Do You, uh, Bob's Diner?
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Be Young, Have Fun, Drink Bob's Diner.
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Diner: The Other White Meat.
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: The Best Part of Waking Up is Bob's Diner in Your Cup.
2005-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: the snack slaps back - Bob's diner
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: riiiiiiiight........*eats ramen*....
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: i'm the first one to get on B's D,aren't i?.......*eats ramen*.........*makes another cup of ramen in the microwave because the one he has is almost out*.........darn microwave.........
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: fo shizzle........*eats ramen*.....darn microwave.....
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: yup! sure is fun here in B's D............*finishes ramen he has*.........darn microwave.....
2005-02-07 [Nc-17]: DARN MICROWAVE!!!!!!
2005-02-07 [Ikko]: Oh your all alone not anymore!^_^
2005-02-07 [El Asesino de pavos]: were back foo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-07 [El Asesino de pavos]: yo yo yo yo embryo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: don't eat ramen...eat lasagna!! (and curse at the microwave for making the plate hot ><)
2005-02-07 [El Asesino de pavos]: wanna fry iguana in tiajuana with yo mama on a llama dot comma???
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: as long as we get to leave her there when we come back...
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... stupid numerous chavez's...
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: .........................
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: tooty fruity
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: *announcer voice* tired of this slow, old Bob's Diner? Then move your Bob's Diner traffic to the CatHug one! Just listen to this satisfied customer!: (*customer voice*) 'Bob's diner on CatHug has a much better menu, and it's less crowded!' (*announcer voice*) There you have it folks! Visit CatHug's Bob's Diner today!!
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: less crowded, you say... *shoots harmonie*
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: STOP SHOOTING AT ME!!!!
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *harpoons harmonie*
2005-02-07 [sara(:]: you actually asked for it....
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: *bangs head* where's Steve ('Knuckles') when I need him?
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: if I change my name again, you'll look really stupid calling me harmonie...
2005-02-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: then I'll just change my comments... *sticks out tounge*
2005-02-07 [sara(:]: *grabs his toung with tongs* Dustin....that isn't very nice *stretches tounge out and lets it go*
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: ah ah...*whips out a bottle of really hot sauce* try this first...
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]:   
2005-02-07 [nokaredes]: wouldn't you like to do that to at least one person a day?
2005-02-07 [sara(:]: awwww...poor penguin...lol
2005-02-07 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*
2005-02-08 [El Asesino de pavos]: ...*eats ramen*....
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chokes you*
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: are you choking the ramen or killer?
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... both?
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: is that possible?
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... maybe...
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ooOOoo please demonstrate *gets out writing tablet to take notes*
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... *chokes phoenix*
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ... AND her tablet ...
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *is strangly turned on* i think you better stop befor you start something you cant finish...
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens bust down the door and order a round of turkey milk*
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *writes down that turkeys d indeed have milk*
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, and chickens have butter... *the chickens glare at turkey* *"get to milkin', turkey boy!" yells the boss*
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *thinks* hmmm if i could just catch it.... millions! absolute millions!
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: WH- WHAT?!
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: oh, why did you have to make me think about turkey milk? and butter! *vomits*
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he...
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *hides cage behind back* here turkey turkey! i have $100 for you......
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... shiny! oh wait... ooo... dull! *eats money*
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: *pumps Turkeys stomach*
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: meh.... glad it was fake ne ways..... time for plan B....
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: Monopoly Money...? ^_^
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: na.... counterfit
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: mmm...Monopoly would've been better.
2005-02-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: if ya sa so.... i wish ET would let me go to my house... or ne ones house for that matter
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: it wouldn't let me log in for like the whole day :( but now it's letting me go to houses
2005-02-08 [El Asesino de pavos]: yup....first person of the day.......again....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *steals your ramen*
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: weirdoes...
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: hey [El Asesino de pavos], are you on CatHug? (more blatant advertising)
2005-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey punk... don't make me start deleting your comments...
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: :P
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: it says [Sagacious Turkey] is banned, on his house...
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: WTF?
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: you can't just wikicomment in other people's accounts!!!
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: tsk tsk...
2005-02-08 [sara(:]: *points at spit_fire* u lied!!!!
2005-02-08 [Soroptimist]: hi
2005-02-08 [Soroptimist]: how is everybody?
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: why not?
2005-02-08 [nokaredes]: is it your home IP?
2005-02-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: guys just a question but on the menu when it says "bob's mama.....$0.50 and hour" what's it mean?
2005-02-08 [Acidic Khemica]: you fuck his mom!
2005-02-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: wow wrongness but okay
2005-02-08 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-02-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: well hell you know it's true
2005-02-08 [Acidic Khemica]: i know
2005-02-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: good hehelol
2005-02-08 [spitfire_35121]: riiiiight...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: uh huh...
2005-02-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: well you know it too
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: I'm gonna be [Soroptimist] for a while then, since you can't...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: ok...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: yup... I'm taking over this name...
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: WHAT?!
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: he he he... sup dork?!
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: your daddy.....he took too much viagfa....*eats ramen*..
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: you know that friggin' idiot that banned your other name? [Lerune]? yeah... she banned me too... THE ONLY WIKI I'VE BEEN ON LATELY IS THIS ONE!!! wanna kill er?
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: uh.......i'm jr....*eats ramen*...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: [Mortified Penguin]... don't make me come through this computer screen...
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: yes'm.........*eats ramen*...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i wanna apply for a job here.
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: that's it... *crashes through the computer screen and chokes you*
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: ok... what you wanna do?
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: yo!Dustin!Who'd you harass?
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: NO ONE!!! HAVEN'T YOU BEEN LISTENING?! [Lerune]'s a liar...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: pole dancer.
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: ok... add it... the password is kitty...
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: uh huh......*eats ramen*....so......what do you wanna do?
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: your mama...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: we shall discuss this tomorrow... pending a pimp slap...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: do you pimp slap with or with out powder?
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: both...
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: uh....what she said.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: all roighty then...
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: this place is weird , i wanna meet bob , * wispers " does he have a sister " *
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: heh heh...........british/english accent....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: who knows... ask killer...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: how much am i gettin paid?
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: yo! like my name?
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: that's what you should name you book... El Asesino...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i want to be paid in pickles
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: okey dokey artichokie...
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol pickles
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: or edible underwear.... whichever comes first
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: pickles are sour.......just like something else....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: speeking of edoribal underwear im ganna by a thong lol my boxers always get up my ass so it would just be easyer to get a thong
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: ?!
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol and ill peraid around town with a sign saying 5 $ a lick
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lmao i know where you can get a vibrating thong
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wtf?! whered everybody go?
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: ?!
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: ?!.....*eats ramen*...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow.... you didnt says *eats ramen*.... im shocked....
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: riiiiiiiiiiiight... *eats nemar*
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: riiiiiiiight .........*eats ramen*...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: OMG...................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................................... ...................................... i forgot what i was saying
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: right....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: oooooookkkkkkk?
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: you "forgot"?.....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what flavor is your ramen?
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes i forgot..... its possible.....
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: hello
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: ummmm.....naruto flavored......*eats ramen*...
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: ?
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *pokes elektra with ramen* hiya!
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: ok
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: naruto?! YOU KILLED NARUTO!!!
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: hey
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: crazy people
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: que pasa?
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: es muy loco en el casa bobs diner.
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: gack
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dont even know if i said that write......
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: ¿usted habla español? bien, conjeturo tan...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: riiiight... I don't believe that CASA was required...
2005-02-09 [El Asesino de pavos]: tu madre,bola de pelo....*come ramen*....
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: so i did say it right? O_o kewlness i was just guessing... i dont really know that much spanish... im trying to learn tho i honestly am!
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: ¡bola del pelo?! * palmada del pimp *
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ummm.... ok......
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: uh huh... I wonder where ol' akira is...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: absolutly no clue what so ever....
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: :)
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: uh huh...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: na uh.....
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: UH HUH!!! *EATS RAMEN!!!*
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]:
NA UH!
2005-02-09 [Elektra180]: ?
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: oh yeah... where's my GBA, chavez?!
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: gba?
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: game boy advance...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oooohhhhhh.......
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: riiiiiight.....
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: RIIIIIIIIIGHTER...
2005-02-09 [spitfire_35121]: see ya, ho...
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: oh shizle
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: this is [nokaredes] I have no idea what is going on can someone tell me? who all are you people?
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i am me obviously soulz is my friend who just got here via me (i think) and[spitfire_35121] over there is bad turkey
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol turkey
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes turkey. [Sagacious Turkey] to be exact.... who went and got himself banned.....
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: stupid git...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yup......
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol bad turkey , tisk tisk tisk
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: I tried to set up an account for him (this one lol) but he said he couldn't use it...so now I'm surfin'...I don't like being a n00b. :S
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol ive never surfed , im not a fan of water sports
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: ...surfing...Elftown...
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol you know what would be funny? if in your house you put the menu and you put a link to everysingle wiki on et in it
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol i dont think anyone has the time for that lol , this place is cool , wierd but cool , hey guys , guess what            TURTLE
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: just humor him bob..... =/
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lol i dont think anyone has the time for that lol , this place is cool , wierd but cool , hey guys , guess what            TURTLE
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: the wiki´s wiki page
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you guys dont get it....... *bitch slaps turtle*
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: its all good , i still have a couple teeth left what a day , first i almost brake my back , then i get elbowd in the nose , then i probably broke my ribs , and now i got bitched slaped... yeah fuckers!! im so loved \m/(>.<)\m/
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: \m/(X.X)\m/
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: well, someone set a microwave on fire at my college's library...less than 5 minutes before I got there. :(
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: um is he ok?
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lmao bet that was funny
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: \m/(6.9)\m/ now hes stoned
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: hence [nokaredes]'s mood damn popcorn...
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lmao so u didnt get to wach the fire?
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: he's probably okay...the whole library (all 3 floors) smelled like burnt popcorn when they finally let us back in...\
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: omfg that would have been awsome.... sry i like the smell of burnt popcorn
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: no, I didn't see the fire...I actually had to EXCERSIZE, by walking 'round campus during my break instead of ETing...oh the horror!!!
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: XP
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lmao well exersize is good but , fire is better :p
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: excersize bites...and I was cursing firebugs the whole time, b/c I didn't find out it was a microwave until after.
2005-02-09 [Soroptimist]: aaaaaaaaaaaaaand...because [Sagacious Turkey] can't delete my comments anymore...visit CatHug's Bob's diner!!
2005-02-09 [Phil Crooked]: lmao
2005-02-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hehehe
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: he deleted my *announcer voice* comment...didn't even warn me...but I'm still here and he's not ^_^
2005-02-09 [Khortex Greyback]: For breakfast I will have three Godzilla Eggs with 2 hash greens, for lunch I’ll have the fried Alley Gator with Fresh n00b with blood crutons, err hmm gor dinner I will have Sasmooko's Shoe,and for desert I’ll have n00b-a-la-blood
2005-02-09 [Khortex Greyback]: Crickets, and and to drink I’ll have 4 pints of blood oh yea can I have [silvermoon dragon]
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: ok, where's our waitress...?
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [nokaredes] Are you talking about [Angelic nightmares]? Because she is the waitress
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: The waitress is sick....She is going to be out for a few weeks...She is going to be with me. She has to get a pregnancy test.
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: hmm...
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: *serves [Khortex Greyback]*
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: why do you say Hmm?
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: gee, they really hate [Sagacious Turkey]...not only is [spitfire_35121] banned, but so am I ([Soroptimist])!! I'm mad, b/c Turkey never used that account!!
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: [Sagacious Turkey] Wheres our paychecks?
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: I say hmm because I just got the idea to make myself assistant waitress
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh alright....That will be fine....Ask [Sagacious Turkey] first
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: [Sagacious Turkey] is banned. he can't answer you (or pay you).
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: I also can't ask him if it's alright for me to be asst. waitress.
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Well I am the Waitor....I am sure that it will be alright....Go a head and put yourself as the assistant waitress....Why is [Sagacious Turkey] banned?
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: bothering people on wikis.
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh thats not good....You can add yourself to the list of Staff
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: I did...
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: ok
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: We all have to find a way to get [Sagacious Turkey] Back on Elftown and on Bob's Dinner
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: hey, they banned me for trying to do that, I'm not gonna try anymore. he'll figure out a way on his own or not at all.
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: though, if a bunch of us sent reports to the guards from his house begging to let him have a second chance, they might think about it...
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: ok...
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: I know his other ID though ^_^
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: nevermind, that one's banned too.
2005-02-09 [Beo-Wulf]: oh
2005-02-09 [Tapestry of Destiny]: what was it?
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: [garfield the cat]
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm back. And theres no more use for an Assisnat Waittress.........none 'fence [nokaredes]
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: k
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: ta who?
2005-02-09 [Acidic Khemica]: .........im just not going to say anything
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: thats what I meant?
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: *runs up and hugs [lady nytmare]*
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: btw, [Soroptimist] is now banned, thank you very much. I can't even sign up a new account in the whole library!!!
2005-02-09 [nokaredes]: I complained on the Guards wiki and the Patrollers wiki, but so far no one's said anything...soon, I'll send a report to the Guards. If they ban me, this me, I can become a hassle, because I know all the public computers in my city. Every. Last. One.
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: hows the diner banned???
2005-02-09 [Acidic Khemica]: uh huh...........
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: well.......be more specific
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: Try what?
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: why do you want to be banned?
2005-02-09 [Angelic nightmares]: and who the fuck would have the sn [Soroptimist]????/
2005-02-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: omfg they banned bobs diner bc hes a clone?
2005-02-10 [Beo-Wulf]: What the hell is going on??????
2005-02-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: [Sagacious Turkey] got banned and then they banned [Soroptimist] bc they thought it was him incognito
2005-02-10 [Beo-Wulf]: so is Bob's Diner No longer in survice?
2005-02-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: the diner is still onpen... that bobs diner *points to name abouv* was a person
2005-02-10 [Beo-Wulf]: oh thats good....
2005-02-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol
2005-02-10 [nokaredes]: no, [Soroptimist] was ME!! and they had NO right to ban ME because I'm NOT a troublemaker. But I could become one.
2005-02-10 [nokaredes]: btw, [Angelic nightmares], DELETE YOUR COMMENTS!!!!!!
2005-02-10 [Beo-Wulf]: Why does [Angelic nightmares] have to delete her comments?
2005-02-10 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah.....why do I have to delete my messages?
2005-02-10 [Khortex Greyback]: best meals i have had in years the noob was still alive but it was good
2005-02-10 [Angelic nightmares]: you ate a live noob?
2005-02-10 [nokaredes]: the comments, so no one knows about our conversation.
2005-02-10 [nokaredes]: live n00bs are the best...
2005-02-10 [nokaredes]: no one's talking since Turkey left...he was the conversation starter...I wish I knew where he is...I miss him!!
2005-02-10 [nokaredes]: he shouldn't have gotten himself banned...
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: Turkey is the type of person to test his limits........give it some time, and hopefully the guards will un-ban him
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: probably not...as he said, he's been banned 3 times before. they're unlikly to give him another chance, especially after what they did to his house.
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: What did they do to his house?
2005-02-11 [Acidic Khemica]: ...............
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: they took his badges away, and said, 'I used to have badges here, but I lost them all because I was an asshole on Elftown'...or something similar.
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: that sucks
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: yep.
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: the diner just aint the same with out Turkey.....
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: nope...you miss him too, right? he's got an account on CatHug, but he hasn't been on it...
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: oh.......tourse I miss him. He's who I'd chase around when my master wasn't around.......
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: he used to shoot me...:'C
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: ............*howls*
2005-02-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: is it just me or is all we can seem tp talk bout now is Turkey and hes gone.....
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks around with nothing to do*
2005-02-11 [Beo-Wulf]: Walks up to [Angelic nightmares]....And *takes her to the fire* and *cuddles up next to her*
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps on [lady nytmare]* missed you!!! *runs back to her master*
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: ok.........so glad the "Chickens" are back tho
2005-02-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *playfully licks the chickens* I missed you guys too
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: lemme guess...someone was here, commented, recieved reply comments, then deleted his/her/its comments so the replies make no sense?
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: recently, apparently, too...
2005-02-11 [Beo-Wulf]: ????
2005-02-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: so thats why theres a hole in the universe....
2005-02-11 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh...Well I am sorry....
2005-02-11 [nokaredes]: but I've been shot already today...
2005-02-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lmao no one would ver be able to figure out my password....
2005-02-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello,does anyone have salt that i can borrow?
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: in big chunks...
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: umm salt? wha? sry dunno ask the cook... (whose never here ne more *cough*pixie*cough*)
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: ...she finds this wiki boring without Turkey...
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *goes to the back and brings out 10 little salt packets for [~Crimson Angel~]*
2005-02-12 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: Sir Loin ran away on a horse but we do have pig tails
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *quickly changes into a wolf and chases down Sir Loin*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *watches slightly interested*
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites his leg and struggles trying to bring his heavy ass back to the diner*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: try bringing him back in pieces it be easier
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: Good point! *tears Sir Loin into 5 pieces and brings the pieces back one by one dropping them at [Insaniac Yoshie]'s feet*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: O_o what do you want me to with then? im just the lowly pole dancer in this joint and im not even getting paid $$$ for it! im getting paid in edible underwear.....
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: O.o
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shrugs* s'true....
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: wow
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *drags the pieces of Sir Loin to the back*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: dont put it in the back freezer! theres something brownish pink growing in it and it told me its name was Jack
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly walks over to the back freezer*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: careful it likes to suck toes... *shudders from the unwanted experience*
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *curls her toes*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *jack from inside freezer* i know your there! i can smell you!
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *growls at jack*
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: *the chickens and Jack start a war over turf*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -Jack- MUAHAHAHA!!! YOU THINK I AM SCARED OF SOME PUNY CHICKEN?! NEVA!!!!!!!!
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches in amazement*
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: *the leader-chicken (as big as Godzilla) comes around the corner, breathing fire* (yes, the ceilings are that high ^_^)
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *runs and hides under and table, my tail tucked between my legs*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -Jack- Oh shit! *craps self- and curiously its neon orange with pink pocka dots*
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *throws up*
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: nuh-uh!! it's just a regular chicken, slightly larger than most, with fire-breathing capacities...
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *pokes head out and looks for Pheonix*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -Jack- *turns green* how embarassing.... *as pheonix* if only i had a million dollars for every time things like this happened... id have a million dollars
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *tilts her head* ya gotta point there
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes.... does ne one happen to have a million dollars on them?
2005-02-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *hands her a millon monopoly dollars*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh yay! *throws money in air and dances in it as it falls*
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: YES!!! Momopoly money!!
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *stuffs her bra full of the money* *runs out of room in her bra and starts stuffing her panties* *BIG wink*
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dunno why they want to attack jack. all i know is he sucked my toes... *shudders again* -Jack- yes! wtf is every ones problem with me? im just an abnormal mold growing in the back of bob's freezer... is it bc i violate health regulations?
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: <.< they didn't attack me, when I was new...
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hmm.. come to think of it they didnt attack me either.... they attacked my bf tho when he first came here....
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: umm... nope cant say i do... you could check The wiki's wiki page though
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: you mean The wiki´s wiki page...it's a different apostrophe...and annoying...mostly the latter...
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes thats what i meant.....
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: riiiiight...
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: where'd you-know-who go, anyway?
2005-02-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dunno... away i think....
2005-02-12 [nokaredes]: hey that's like the Sims...did you know the Sims can pee themselves?
2005-02-12 [lady nytmare]: Bob´s Diner
2005-02-12 [lady nytmare]: Ｂｏｂ’ｓ Ｄｉｎｅｒ
2005-02-13 [nokaredes]: why?
2005-02-13 [lady nytmare]: I don't know...
2005-02-13 [nokaredes]: *shakes her fist*
2005-02-13 [nokaredes]: yes, Jack, you violate too many things...especially [Insaniac Yoshie]...
2005-02-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why are you guys deleting half your comment? i can tell ya are bc it sounds like i/2 a phone convo
2005-02-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Thank you for the salt wiccan wolf.
2005-02-13 [Angelic nightmares]: no problem
2005-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Now I can cook my special recipe.
2005-02-14 [Acidic Khemica]: .................
2005-02-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches [~Crimson Angel~]*
2005-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am finished want to try it?
2005-02-14 [Soroptimist]: sure!
2005-02-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at it* whats in it?
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: we are deleting half our comments so the extra watchers don't know you-know-who's secret identity...
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: you watched her make it...you know what's in it...
2005-02-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i think its kinda obvious who it is if you know him. unless your new here and then youd have no clue
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: and the guards are new...hence, we delete all incriminating comments ^_^
2005-02-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well its slightly annoying to look at 1/3 of a convo and have no clue what going on
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: yep. well, he deleted his, so I deleted mine...
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: you should just be here when the convo is going on...we've also been chatting on other wikis...
2005-02-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i am here when the convos going on yoiu guys delet as your talking
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: no we don't...we delete when we're almost done O.o
2005-02-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: iv been here with like 30 sec between visits and half the convos gone.... but ok
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: then you should be faster than that 
2005-02-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: its not me thats slow... its my stupid comp :S
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: what speed do you have? I'm usually at a measly 40-56kbs speed...
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: except when the weather is crappy, we get 7 >.<
2005-02-14 [Beo-Wulf]: Happy Valentine's day
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: oh, you beat me to it...oh, well, I have a picture...
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: 
2005-02-14 [Beo-Wulf]: Aww..thats a cute dog
2005-02-14 [Angelic nightmares]: awwww
2005-02-14 [lady nytmare]: eeeeeeek!
2005-02-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps*
2005-02-14 [nokaredes]: *hugs you-know-who*
2005-02-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: gee... know what i got fpr V-day? a cheating boy friend!!!!!
2005-02-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *takes the cowboy hat off her head and tosses it* Yeeeehawwwww
2005-02-15 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] I would like to see you wearing a cowbuy hat....I really do.....I really had a great time with you tonight.....I loves you so much
2005-02-16 [silvermoon dragon]: I'm gay!
2005-02-16 [Angelic nightmares]: are you really?
2005-02-16 [sara(:]: 0_0 that was....surprising....
2005-02-16 [nokaredes]: hehe...you stupidhead!
2005-02-17 [Angelic nightmares]: god!! Ever one knows your supposed to log out using a school computer
2005-02-17 [Angelic nightmares]: he/she/it/them/they prolly deleted the message him self.
2005-02-17 [Angelic nightmares]: oh.......what is it kitty?
2005-02-17 [Angelic nightmares]: Is it tho?
2005-02-17 [nokaredes]: no.
2005-02-17 [Angelic nightmares]: Ya know hyper.....your basiclly spelling it out for them
2005-02-17 [nokaredes]: nu-uh!
2005-02-17 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes huh
2005-02-17 [nokaredes]: nu-uh!
2005-02-17 [Angelic nightmares]: YEAH!!!!!!
2005-02-17 [lady nytmare]: *the chickens kick down the door and order a round of yo mama*
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes huh!
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: * shoots the ghetto chikens * my moma hungary
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hehehe
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 'Lo
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you want to try my enchaladas?
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: nu-uh!
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why?
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes huh!
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok.*hands Pheonix Ashes an enchalada*
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: thank you (to hyper)
yes huh!
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: What do you think of my enchalada?
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]:
GOOD
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Thank you,do you want the recipe?
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: enchalada
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you want one,Soulz_On_Fire?
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes'um plz
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: OK,Just get some shells for it,some meat,sourcream,cheese,and sace.
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: kk
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: that nu-uh! was directed at [Insaniac Yoshie], as well as this one:
2005-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: your welcome
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes huh!
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]:
nu-uh!
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: and no thanks, I'm not hungry. that, and I don't know what enchiladas are...
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: but I know what chimichangas are...make some of those, and you've got a deal!!
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: [
YES HUH!
]
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: MAYBEE
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: [
NU-UH!!!
]
NU-UH TIMES INFINITY!!!!
Turkey's gonna be so jealous of this convo...or something...
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes huh!
2005-02-18 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Who would be jealous of this insanity?!
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: moo
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: i meen
MOO
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: Turkey, that's who...he'd be happy to know that he was the cause ^_^ [
NU-UH!!
]
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i fur got wut we were fighting bout
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]:
NU-UH!!
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh? so your taking her side? i see how you are!
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: i meen
HELL YEAH
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -.-'' *castrates soulz*
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: whoa whoa im on your side!
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: no ur not you said "na uh" im the "yes huh"
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: but i said hell yeah i was on your side i said nuh uh arcastically :( can i have my manhood back?
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: umm... no *puts it in a jar and places jar on shelf in back* some one might want that
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: yeah like me! lol its not the first time this happend , " bob i need another replacement "
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you need a B.O.B.?! lmfao!!!!
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: ok wrong thing to say then , i ment as a person not with the annitials , thx phe im not ganna sleep well tonight
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: oh thats good look at my man hood up for sale , \m/(>.<)\m/
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol well you cant have those ones back bc their appitizers now *points to menu under appitizer* see?
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: lol meat balls?
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you notice its under "appitizers" and not "dinner"? (you better get this soulz)
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: oohh i think you just called my balls small , if so then * crie * thats so not cool , and not true
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol i sowwie sould i change it? deserts maybe?
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: lol yeah deserts
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: lol yeah deserts becouse of the " frosting "
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ewww.... ok have it your way...
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: like at mcydees?
2005-02-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: thee ya go
2005-02-18 [Phil Crooked]: lol yay
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: oh, so you people are ganging up on me now? do I have to get some reinforcements? O.o *calls the Chicken Gang on a set of walkie talkies*
2005-02-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes head at hyper*
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: *the chickens knock down the door carrying a little boy* "what ya want?!" *they throw the boy out the window* "we'll deal with him later..."
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: FROSTED MANHOOD?!?! DO YOU KNOW HOW SICK THAT SOUNDS?!?!
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: I'll only take three... *orders some frosted manhood*
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: by the way... how much damage has the chicken gang done to this place?!
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: by the other way... go to www.habbohotel.com
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: you have to install something to go to hablohotel...
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: and your point is?
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: ok, I joined. now what?
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: i'll only be able to go on on weekdays, though, b/c I don't want to install anything on my home computer.
2005-02-18 [Beo-Wulf]: How are all you people doing?
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: Turkey, what room are you in?
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: decent... my name on there is thebadturkey
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: I know who you are, what room are you in?
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: 
2005-02-18 [Angelic nightmares]: ok......
2005-02-18 [lady nytmare]: I'll add you to my friends list...
2005-02-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay everybody I am going to change my name from gothic vampire to darkness wolf
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: you did...
2005-02-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes I know
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: I don't like hablohotel, it's boring, I don't know anyone who's on...
2005-02-18 [nokaredes]: I found Bob's Diner over there though...
2005-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
2005-02-19 [nokaredes]: I don't know...
2005-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
2005-02-19 [nokaredes]: why what?
2005-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.
2005-02-19 [lady nytmare]: *twitch*
2005-02-19 [Beo-Wulf]: *walks into the room* Whats going on?
2005-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY DIDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS TOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-19 [lady nytmare]: *shoots misty* mutter mutter...
2005-02-19 [Beo-Wulf]: *Walks into the dinner* What is going on?.....Did someone have way to much of my coffee?
2005-02-19 [nokaredes]: *offended noise* you shot [~Crimson Angel~]!!!!
2005-02-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *snore*
2005-02-19 [nokaredes]: Did you see that? *pokes [Insaniac Yoshie] to wake her up* He shot [~Crimson Angel~]!!!
2005-02-19 [Beo-Wulf]: Walks into the back and *Clocks Out* It was a long day, Now I am going home....Night everybody
2005-02-19 [nokaredes]: Did you *clock in*? I hadn't noticed...
2005-02-19 [Beo-Wulf]: oh....Really....I did *clock in* tho....Honestly I did....Take Care....Night Everyone
2005-02-19 [nokaredes]: Goodnight!!
2005-02-19 [lady nytmare]: 
2005-02-19 [lady nytmare]: 
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *screams coughs and dies*BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: serves you right, you Turkey-stealer!!
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rises from the dead*I do not steal Turkeys,I am going to hunt you capybara for the rest of your life.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: No! You are not going to hunt capybara, you are not going to get shot, and you are not going to die!!!
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I will hont you and capybara for the rest of both of your lifes.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: so, you'll stalk us? I don't like stalkers...
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I am a ghost,so I will hont you both.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: oh, haunt. that's...better. I think.
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever,I will haunt you and caphybara for the rest of your life.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: why?
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Because I want to.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: >.>
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: *throws water balloons at [~Crimson Angel~]*
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: They went through me I am a ghost remember.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: <.< *sucks [~Crimson Angel~] into a vaccuum cleaner, like in Ghostbusters*
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *makes vacum explode and pops out*WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: *is covered in gook* *frowns*
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: guess I'll need a stronger vaccuum...
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hahaha.WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: *green gook*
2005-02-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes head*
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: *whips out a bigger vaccuum and sucks [~Crimson Angel~] into this one* *hands [Angelic nightmares] some plastic wrap (like at some concerts), just in case*
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *makes the vacum explode,and makes the plastic wrap disappear*WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: you can't dissappear the plastic wrap!!
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes I can,my husband is Harry Potter.
2005-02-20 [Angelic nightmares]: REALLY?!?!?! I'm related to Sirius....he's my god-father
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: well, just because your husband is Harry, doesn't mean you can dissappear the plastic. *re-appears the plastic*
2005-02-20 [Beo-Wulf]: My name is Hermione....Well [Angelic nightmares] gave it to me
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok,and yes I got married to Harry Potter he just brought me back to life and killed the guy that killed me.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: someone killed you? *ish confuzzled*
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Capybara killed me so Harry killed him,and brought me back to life.
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: ah...*brings Capybara back to life* *snarfs [~Crimson Angel~]*
2005-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: What does snarf mean?
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: if you don't know, then I'm not gonna tell you. (hint: I can't really do it as a human, I had to change to a dragon form)
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: *snarfs you, snarfs you, snaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrffffffffffffffffsssssssssssss yooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu*
2005-02-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *watches Misty gets snarfed* eeeeeeewww...
2005-02-20 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay everybody I am going to *Clock Out* once again....Take Care....Nite
2005-02-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: g'nite!
2005-02-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: why's there only one thing in the poll?
2005-02-20 [nokaredes]: I still never saw you clock in...
2005-02-20 [Angelic nightmares]: He's a weird one tho. He seems to always "Clock Out" yet he never "Clocks in"
2005-02-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *wraps arms around [Beo-Wulf] real tightly* And he's ALLLLLLLLLLLL mines!!
2005-02-20 [lady nytmare]: come on people! It's Bob's Diner!!! DARN LOGIC!!! *shakes his fist and pulls out a "ghost-o-matic 3000"*
2005-02-20 [lady nytmare]: *cackles evily and randomly fires*
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: *gets sucked into the ghost-o-matic 3000* O.o *muffled cries for help*
2005-02-21 [Beo-Wulf]: What is the "ghost-o-matic 3000" ?
2005-02-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Dont ask.....
2005-02-21 [Beo-Wulf]: umm....Alright
2005-02-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Trust me.....ya dont want to know
2005-02-21 [Beo-Wulf]: Master misses his Ginger
2005-02-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *curls up in her masters lap*
2005-02-21 [Beo-Wulf]: Goes into [wolf form] And *cuddles up to [Angelic nightmares]* And *Sits next to the fire*
2005-02-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *snuggles REAL close to [Beo-Wulf]*
2005-02-21 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares] I miss you alot....I really need to be held
2005-02-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly falls asleep curled up to [Beo-Wulf]*
2005-02-21 [Beo-Wulf]: Are you tired [Angelic nightmares]?....Well I am tired also....Cuddles up to [Angelic nightmares] and falls asleep in her arms
2005-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the hell does snarf mean??????TELL ME OR DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: *grins evily and snarfs you*
2005-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok that is it.*Shoots hyperharmonie with a bebe gun shot gun and flametrower*Die bitch die.
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: only Turkey is allowed to shoot me...*whips out a grenade-launcher (and launches grenades at [~Crimson Angel~], which should be obvious)*
2005-02-21 [lady nytmare]: *shoots hyperharmonie*
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: YAY!!
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: you know what 'snarf' means, right?
2005-02-21 [lady nytmare]: uh huh...
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: good...here I was thinking everyone knows it...or has a half-British friend. (damn her! she's in London for two weeks!)
2005-02-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: haha...London.
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: oh shut up.
2005-02-21 [lady nytmare]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: you too.
2005-02-21 [sara(:]: can somebody say "issues"
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: sorry...I'm not feeling well, and I want Emily to be over here, but she's not, and people keep poking fun at me, and if I were feeling up to it I might literally rip someone's head off.
2005-02-21 [sara(:]: *pats hyperharmonie on the back* tis ok....i, and many more people have felt that way....as i do now....ne1 seen turkey boy?
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: thank you...no, not for a while...he comes and goes.
2005-02-21 [sara(:]: np...yes i no.....i need someone to throw knives at...but as always he's never here when i need him....i'll just get him at school tomorrow if he doesn't come on....
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: you can throw knives at me, I won't move because I feel horrible.
2005-02-21 [lady nytmare]: ok! *throws knives at hyper*
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: thanks...
2005-02-21 [sara(:]: no i wouldn't do that to you when you feel bad...mayb on a better day.
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: maybe Turkey could take a hint from you, then.
2005-02-21 [sara(:]: i will punch him...but tomorrow fore i must go now...good bye and feel better
2005-02-21 [nokaredes]: you will punch him? don't do that on account of me!! and thanks
2005-02-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: YAY!!! *shoots hyper*
2005-02-22 [nokaredes]: *gasps* you're unbanned!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-22 [nokaredes]: too bad I have to go soon...
2005-02-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: soooo... you said I can no longer delete comments, huh? *cackles*
2005-02-22 [nokaredes]: uhm...............
2005-02-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAa.
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAt?
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: *apears and sits down*
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: in the termite infested stool...
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: uh huh
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens kick down the door*
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: not again
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: mwa ha ha HACK! *the gang of chickens choke me*
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.o?
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: OMG OMG OMG turkey?!?!?!
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.*hides in corner*
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: .........
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hides in the shadows*Sniff*
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: okay?
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: did i miss something here?
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: maybe
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Screams and turns into a vampire and kills the chickens then sucks out there blood*
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -.O;;
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *licks lips and flys toward Pheonix Ashes to suck out her blood*
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im utterly lost....
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs Pheonix Ashes and sucks out her blood then watches her die licks lips and flys toward The Bad Turkey to suck out his blood*
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll bet you are...
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sucks out The Bad Turkey's blood then watches him die licks lips then turns back into the form of a regular person*
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *grabs neck and falls over* should i feel special now?
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Watches The Bad Turkey and Pheonix Ashes come back alive as vampires then watches them go turn into the form of a regular person even though they are vampires*
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: woo... *clips his tooth*
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Watches it grow back*
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: oh, look at what I missed...I should quit that stupid 'school' thing.
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *turns into a vampire again and sucks out hyperharmonie's blood watches him/her die then licks my lips then turns back into the form of a regular person*
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: indeed...
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: haha...it wouldn't be good blood, because I'm already 1/2 vampy. sorry...find someone else.
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Good night.*goes to bed*
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hmm....
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: are we suppose to hate her forever now?
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: uhm...we're supposed to hate her at all?
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: thats what im asking....
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink* what? just, no. the answer is no.
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wha?.... sry im blonde today......
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: either that, or you're on drugs...
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: *ignores [Insaniac Yoshie], who just insulted blonde people all over the world* I'm sorry, what? I didn't hear you.
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ok not blonde... retarded then
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: HA HA HA!!! BLONDE PEOPLE!!! *sticks out tounge*
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *grabs turkeys tounge and pierces it*
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: grrrrrrr...are you LOOKING for a fight, Turkey? because my day has royally sucked, and I'm looking for a victim...
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: you wanna victim? ha! your mama was a victim of an ugly baby!
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: *gasp* he's...taunting me!!
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: *pretends Turkey is her math teacher, and her SC teacher, and the one who stole her SC book, and the person who is demanding she get off the computer RIGHT NOW!!, and the one who made it rain...but takes the easy way out and throws him off of the Statue of Liberty*
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: besides, you have no idea if I was an ugly baby...unless you know where the secret wiki is...
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: well, I've already been to the actual "secret wiki"...
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: *also pretends you are the pen that broke all over her second ever ink drawing, and stabs your dead body with the empty cartrige*
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: what? you've been to the wiki? both pages?
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: wha ha ha ha haa!!! *gets up* wow! thanks! that cured my back pains! *walks away*
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: *takes out a giant, comical hammer, screaming 'YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE DEAD!!!!!!!' and beats him with it*
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh? sorry... *lays down*
2005-02-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: wow, you guys always have the most interesting conversations...
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: "conversations" you say...
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: don't we?
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you call this a convo?! there hasnt even been any recent chicken activity!!!!!!
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens crash through the wall and order some artichoke pie*
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]:  new "badge"... can anyone guess what show has this "president"?
2005-02-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ah... the chickens... much better....
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-02-23 [Useless]: he he....*eats ramen*...
2005-02-23 [Useless]: rrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.........*echo*......*eats ramen*....
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks his head*
2005-02-23 [dark starlight]: mmm...molded ramen..lol
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! that's the president from milk chan up there...
2005-02-23 [Useless]: uh......dustin......rrrrriiiiiiiiiiigt.....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-23 [Useless]: yo!Dustin!did we have any math homework?
2005-02-23 [Useless]: .....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: NO!!! all he did was talk to us about lines and stuff...
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2005-02-23 [Useless]: oh.....okey dokey smokey....*eats ramen*....Hugh Jass....
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: and change your name to "fuzzy bunny"...
2005-02-23 [Useless]: hee hee........*eats ramen*...
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: you can kiss my hugh jass...
2005-02-23 [Useless]: i bet you'd like that,wouldn't you?
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight... check out the ride I designed... 
2005-02-23 [Useless]: rrriiiiiiiiiiiiight....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-23 [Acidic Khemica]: holy fuck 0.o i feel sorry for the duck
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey fuzzy bunny! what's your name on habbo hotel?
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: you found that wiki on EP, I see...
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: half of the stuff on that wiki comes from www.funnyjunk.com
2005-02-23 [nokaredes]: yep. your point is?
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... useless is useless!!!
2005-02-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: that's just wrong guys take it off
2005-02-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: it will eventually disappear into the old comments...
2005-02-23 [Useless]: uh huh.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
2005-02-24 [jumpy little pixie]: ............................hi
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *apears*
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:I love God.*flys around singing praises to the LORD.*
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at her*oh god.......
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:How dare you.*Slaps akiratetsuo in the face 50 times*
2005-02-24 [jumpy little pixie]: ...........*head tilt*
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *stands up her eyes going black her fangs bared she growled*
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:That is what you get.*flys up so high that I almost touch the clouds*
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: god doesnt exsist
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:How dare you.*Comes down slaps akiratetsuo in the face 999,999,999,999,999 times*
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *laughs*so your god punishes those who dont believe and i thought the way was you christion faith you didnt believe in hurting someone who didnt believe and when he comes to take all those to heaven he is going to make the non believers suffer 7 years of hell for a simple act of free will?
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: 7 years? ONLY?! HA HA HA HA!!! poor mortal fool...
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes but it's an act of free will against the laws of god...
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:Who do you think made the earth it didn't just fall out of the sky,the devil sure didn't make it.
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: how do you know?
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:I have read the Bible.
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: my birthday is the 25... what are yall planning to do?! BETTER BE SOMETHING GOOD!!!
2005-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:Happy early Birthday.
2005-02-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: you should've told us earlier then...damn short-notice giver!!
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry... I'll help with the expense of the party... in the amount of... $0.000001!!! HA HA HA!!! suckers...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: hey, we know your real name now...
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: RiIiIiIiIiGhT...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: why do we have to do anything for your birthday anyway? y'all didn't do anything for me...
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: what's your point?
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: join www.habbohotel.com
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Diner is only six months old... it already has over fifty members and over 4000 comments...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: i did...just haven't been on. besides, you're always on the computer when I'm at school. jerk.
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: that's an average of 22 comments a day...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: huh?
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: oh that...yes, we've noticed.
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: I make only about half of those comments... which means I have about an average of 11 a day... which means we have to get commenting! this is a disgrace!
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: well, I seem to make every other comment...
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, but you haven't been here as long...
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: HA HA HA... mr. influence... first wiki...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: of course I haven't been here as long...besides, I signed up another account before this one, and gave it to a friend. and mr. influence was not my first wiki...
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: it was MINE...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: sure...I believe that.
2005-02-24 [Useless]: WASSUP?!?!
2005-02-24 [Useless]: hmmmmm......i'm the first one to get on today,right?......*eats ramen*....
2005-02-24 [Useless]: it's my mom's birthday today!.........i think she is
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: hi
2005-02-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: hi
2005-02-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: your on the Mainstreet.
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: I KNOW!! *duck tapes Tap's mouth*
2005-02-24 [Angelic nightmares]: Todays mainstreet?
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: or yesterdays. I noticed that I didn't get a 'your friend so-and-so has a birthday today. You haven't forgotten, have you?' message for my friend, and went and saw that he had, in fact, PUT his birthday up, and he had, so I asked Hedda why I hadn't gotten one, and it turns out no one's been getting them for about a month. and no one noticed. so it was a bug, and I got put on the Mainstreet because I found it.
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! useless! when you get on, it's http://www.shardsoglass.com/shard.cfm?lp=1
2005-02-24 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey there mooney... good news for you... [Mortified Penguin]'s unbanned!
2005-02-24 [sara(:]: -_- wonderful.......*punches Dustin*
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: aww... how sweet... *punches back*
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: NOOOOOOOOOOO!!! be back in a little bit... *mumbles about killing the dentist*
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.shardsoglass.com/shard.cfm?lp=1
2005-02-24 [sara(:]: I'll be waitin' for ya! *sits*
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: dentists suck, but not as much as regular doctors do.
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: ahahahaha...ahem.
2005-02-24 [sara(:]: that is true
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight... I guess I won't be hearing from that dentist again...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: what did you do?
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't ask...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: I already did! *brings out a police light and positions it over Turkey. also brings out several forms of torture, including but not limited to thumbscrews, various tools of carpentry, her own dentist, and her own doctor who loves using as little local anaesthesia as possible* do I have to ask you again?
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *apears*
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... don't ask...
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: okay i wont
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: if I start yelling at you, my dog'll think you're being mean...
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: ........
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: then he'll attack you, friend or not (this is true, just ask [~And the wind calls her Demona~])
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: okay then....
2005-02-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens knock down the door and wrestle the dogs*
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: not again
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: dog. and good idea, pit what's partly my creation against one of my pets. *dog kills chickens, except for the fire-breathing one, who runs far far away with his hands in the air*
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: -.-
2005-02-24 [nokaredes]: *hand-wings*
2005-02-24 [Acidic Khemica]: okay then.......
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: but you forget... clone-o-matic! *creates a massive army of chickens*
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: fuck........-.-
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *uses the clone-o-matic on her dog* (you should've seen that coming...or are you people not betas?)
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah... but I did see that coming... *clones himself and kills dogs and puts them on the menu*
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *gasps* that was mean! ;_; I can't even think of a good twist, that was so mean!
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: wait...yes I can! zombie-dogs, of course of course! *the dogs rise from the dead, because Turkey is a bad killer, and eat Turkey*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *alive*
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, but I'm the BAD turkey! *the dogs die of food poisening and are reput on the menu*
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: -.-
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: reput? oh, you mean re-put. stupid Dustin. besides, who wants to eat something that died of food poisoning?
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...............................................................................
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *strangles Turkey*
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *smirks and sits back*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *with her bare hands*
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ..........................................................*silence*.......................................................................
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: if they didn't want to eat something dead and potentially fatal... why are they here?!?!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: uh huh...*eats ramen*
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: the sun has set all darkness
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: HOW DO YOU GET THE WORDS THAT BIG?
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: it is easy
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: the ol' huge html...
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH??!
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: what what?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: OMG!! *is hypnotised!!* (*is too hypnotised to figure out how correctly spell the word*)
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: wow they dance
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ever been numb before?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: numb where?
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: mouth... *mumbles about the dentist again*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: yep...it wouldn't matter to me today, though...I have no voice ;_; not since mid-Tuesday. hence, excessice ETing, excessive reports to guards, and bug-noticing!
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: and recessive visits to habbohotel...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hrm? well, I'm at the wrong computer...and you're not there when I am. :(
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: I sent you a friend request...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I've been numb in the entire foot before, two weeks ago and then today...they had to use three times the local anesthesia than normal! *is proud*
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... we've got in another 100 comments since yesterday... keep it up!!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: well, pray we don't have snow tomorrow, and that I'll have school then!
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: I wish we had some frikin' snow... I haven't eaten a snowman in... like... forever!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: it was bad snow...the annoying kind that leaves little welts on the skin and makes people afraid to drive even though it's actually safe...it won't be snowman snow for a few days. we got about four inches, and it's still at it. if we don't have school tomorrow, I'll have to wait all the way until Monday do do anything but ET, EP, and CatHug!! ;_; don't get me wrong, I love them, but I want to IM someone!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: my friend [la vie lemon] got a foot in England though! (she's such a copycat!)
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: this explains the mood...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Yepsiree...my old one anyway...
2005-02-25 [Useless]: ummmmmm...........my password....*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: where'd the other people go?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: your...password...?
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: YOU FORGOT ANOTHER PASSWORD?!?! *kills useless*
2005-02-25 [Useless]: wassup?!.......*eats ramen*...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: see you
2005-02-25 [Useless]: uh huh.....i see YOU.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: gee, could it be because people have to make them hard to hide them from you?
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn... I thought you were blind...
2005-02-25 [Useless]: riiiiiiiiiiight.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who is ramen?
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ramen is an irish hooker...
2005-02-25 [Useless]: it's pronounced:RAW-men......*eats ramen*......no,i do not eat raw men......*eats ramen*....
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: rah-men!!!
2005-02-25 [Useless]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight.......*eats ramen*....
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *anime fall*
2005-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELP ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-25 [Useless]: with what?
2005-02-25 [Useless]: by by!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: rah-mehn!!
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I haven't eaten in three days, and am now going to eat my weight in rah-mehn...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: how about some RAW MEN?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: eew...I'm on my 3rd bowl now, including the broth...I think I might clean out my store tonight!! ^_^;
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: no one's talking ;_; I'm so bored...I think I'm going to look at all the wikis on the wiki´s wiki page.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: my store is under my bed, in a giant plastic box...there's about ...30...? I'm guessing.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: sweeeeet... send me some... my mouth is back to normal... *kills the dentist*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: so's mine! 'cept for the voice thing...what's your address?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: duuuuuuuude! come back!
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... 3600... *mumble mumble*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: scaredy cat. I'm not gonna stalk you or anything...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I swear I saw a comment here before...*is seeing things*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *doesn't care* If a red house is made from red bricks, and a blue house is made from blue brick, and a pink house is made from pink bricks, and a black house is made from black bricks, what is a green house made from?
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: old bricks that need cleaning?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: no...guess again.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... green bricks?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: no...guess again.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: (nope)...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I'm not getting wiki-comment alerts anymore, are you?
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: occasionally I don't...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: but not recently...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: what? whatever...anyway...guess what's on the wiki Chefs of Elftown? BAKED TURKEY!!
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: yep. would I lie to you?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: and the answer is glass.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooooooookkkkkkkk? I was going to say wood, but oh well... that's got to be the worst riddle I've ever heard...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I know, isn't it horrible? I remember it from elementary school, and I also keep getting people to say 'green bricks'. ^_^
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Is that address real?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I would've told you my real address...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... it's my REAL address... (nope)
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hmmm...that's weird then.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: weird? how?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: it just is.
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-25 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: yea like i am goin to yell at u tomorrow, wat were u thinkion? any of these guys could come to ur house out of nowhere n do something to u
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: there's mostly girls on this wiki anyway...and none of them are even in the same time zone!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hey, Turkey, now you look weird saying riiiight twice in a row...
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ahem! I'm still here!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I said mostly...you should hear the conversation we're not having here.
2005-02-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: what are you all on about?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: uhm...nothing! *whistles*
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]:
HAPPY B-DAY [Sagacious Turkey]!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: [
HAPPY PINK B-DAY ][Sagacious Turkey]!
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lmfao
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: merry x-mas
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: he's not even on...he's a question mark.
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *punches soulz* RETARDOUS MAXIMUS!!!!!!!!
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: so i noticed
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *smashes a beer bottle over soulz' head* (we're gonna push our messages to Turkey off the page...)
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well we could just post them over and over and over and over.... besides were a ways from the top
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: then stop hitting me
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *hits soulz again*
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]:
SHMACK!
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: oww..... * sniffle * wheres my blow up doll
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]:
POP!
oops sry soulz... the needle just sliped...
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: oh well it was getting too used anywayse
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: how dare Turkey do that anyway, just leave us here alone with our own boredom...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: psst...what're you getting him? Turkey I mean.
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: um... i dunno... =/
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I drew him a pretty picture, of him as a Turkey-man..........but my scanner's broken. ;_; stupid thing...I've been told it's possessed.
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: get him a musical condom yes they make musical condoms now
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: WTF?
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i... i... have nothing! its the best gift of all!!
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: lmao get him a jar of air
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: you have nothing?!
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ill redo mine later when hes actually one
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: uh huh...you could always give him your home address for his birthday...
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: right.... im not that dumb
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: lmao
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: he put his...
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lord knows whatll happen if i do that... "i have a shipment of 40 dildos, 600 pairs of edible underwear, and 17 cases of lubicant for this address. what do ya want me to do with them?"
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hehehehe...I don't think Turkey would do that...would he?
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: whoa
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I'm bored. Would someone kill me? (that's Turkey's que to come back...)
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: its turkey were talking about here. you tell me?
2005-02-25 [Phil Crooked]: nighjt
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: you're goin to bed?!
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: g'nite im levin to
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: ;_; at least put your comment back...
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: kk il doo that just for you
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]:
HAPPY B-DAY [Sagacious Turkey]!
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *huggles and kisses hyper* i sowwie but g2g2 bed its 1230 here nite nite see ya tomorrow
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: [
HAPPY PINK B-DAY] [Sagacious Turkey]!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: You're supposed to be doing it for Turkey....!
2005-02-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol nite! *waves*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: night.......
2005-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hey, lookit!   
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]:   
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Just something I had to do so I wouldn't feel so guilty...it's weird...I didn't feel like using any automatic shapes or letters or nething...also, half the comors were ones I made myself, before ET didn't like 'em.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: We don't have enough comments...*silence*...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: ....*more silence*....come on guys! there are, like, 1000 members of this wiki! where'd you all go?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *is bored* 'Nobody likes you, everyone left you...They're all out without you havin' fun...'
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Greenday.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *has nothing better to do*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *is sick*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I wonder how long it'll take me to have the whole page of comments to myself?
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *walks around backwards*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I wonder how long I can comment before someone comes on...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I wonder how to properly punctuate an 'I wonder' statement.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I wonder why I don't want to eat anything again...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I wonder if that 'Put this wiki under wiki-changes' button works for IE? *checks*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Yep...works for me...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *makes ramen to eat even though she's not hungry, continues commenting in boredom*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *will get this wiki up to 30692 comments like weirdoes united! all by herself*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *pesters a non-BD-wiki friend in other window*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: grr...he logged out before reading my message.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *is probably going to get banned, because she's as bad as Turkey when she's bored*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: :D *found a picture violating the UAR on a house and gets to a. tattle or b. be nice/stuckup and tell him...*hmm...decisions, decisions...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *told him. now has extra wiki-paperwork*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *finished paperwork, is bored again*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I wonder if I can bother my other friend.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hoo-ah! *realised she is the solitart occupant of all 25 comment places*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *realises she spelled solitary wrong*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *doesn't care enough to edit the comment*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *couldn't find out earlier if there's school or not today. will have to...oh, wait...she has no voice! She CAN'T CALL ANYONE!!!* @^$(@*#&$!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I just got a message from a noob, asking why he doesn't have a badge yet...stupid n00bs...grr
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: like I'd have anything to do with badges...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I sent him on his way, as nicely as is to be expected. to the right wiki even!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *puts this back up, even though she'll comment it off the page again*   
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *eats a cookie*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: it's kinda demented looking...monkey has a really crooked smile.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: stupid new meds are the reason I'm not hungry...*curses at them*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I suppose I'd rather have loss of apetite than feel my foot...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Yay! I have to check if a piccy is fake or not...it's an order, soldier!! :D
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hmmmm....does anyone else think there's school tonight? there isn't much snow on the road...then again, there wasn't much yesterday...*kicks herself* I should've checked earlier!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hey...if there is school today, I can get my school ID!! :D then I can do lots of stuff for free!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: speaking of money...I think an abnormal of ramen-eaters get ripped off...we can buy ramen for seven cents a bag here, up at Magruders...I've heard some people are paying up to a whole quarter!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: sad, sad, ignorant people...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I have ONE friend on right now...out of FOURTY-ONE!! WTF? that doesn't even include wiki-buddies...like [Falx]. I wonder if [Falx] is on...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: nope. figures.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I asked said Under-Investigation-person if he had drawn his dragon, and he read but didn't respond. that's suspicious, right? if someone asked me if I drew something of mine, I'd be indignant!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: 'How dare you! Of course I drew that you stupid twit!'
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: 'Why? Is it that good?'
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: or maybe that's just the mood I'm in now...I should find some holy water.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: then I could excorcise my scanner, and draw something new.
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Breakthrough in the case!! there's a signature! it's not his! now I just want to know where it came from...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: *severly evil, menacing grin*
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I'm gonna give him a chance to own up again though, or my conscience will eat me alive later...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: I don't have PS here...I can't enhance the sig. :(
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: there's so much airbrush art on the 'Net!!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: Blue believes in me! I can do it!
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: hmm...need to send an official message...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: God...this is going to annoy lots of people when they FINALLY GET THEIR ASSES BACK TO ELFTOWN...it's actually starting to bore me as well, now...
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: one more time, for good luck....   
2005-02-25 [nokaredes]: btw, if anyone's interested in helping the various branches of the ET administration and several dozen random people who are trying to get this guy, his name is [Wise_dragon]. Feel free to tell me so I can take all the cred-...I mean, to can report him to the guards if you can find his second image on the 'Net.
2005-02-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: oh, damn, you beat me to it. 
2005-02-25 [Acidic Khemica]: holy fuck........that is the last thing i need to see
2005-02-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: are all these comments [hyperharminoe]'s??!
2005-02-25 [sara(:]: *walks in* just about it w/ the acception of a few.
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yeah like our 4 at the bottom
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: hehehe...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: my thingy is better than your thingy!!
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -.o i dont have a "thingy"...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: no, I meant tapestry.
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh.........
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: so, did anyone try to read all my comments?
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: "blue believes in me i can do it!"
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: hehe...yea. I have had a bad day. i am now capable of being civil with my friends, however, but am looking for someone to take it out on. any takers? didn't think so.
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ....
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I don't actually think I could be madder...I hate people. outside ET of course! real-person-people. in-person-people. you know what I mean! *starts cussing* @$#&^, *&!^$, @%^#&*...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: do I have to start commenting by myself again? I bet I freaked you out...I've never been this mad in all my 16-and-a-quarter years. I hope I'm not still mad at those people on Monday, because I'm likely to get arrested...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: ^@%#$*...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yeah i know what you mean
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: They're horrible peole, and I won't be speaking to them anymore (no pun intended, for all those who know I've lost my voice)
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I was about ready to start taking out random passersby...but no passersby passed me by.
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol?
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I'm probably going to draw angry things all weekend...and dammit, I forgot to get a pack of copy paper!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: The only reason I came onto ET was to write an angry diary entry...and to make sure my wiki-comments list didn't get out of hand.
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: << >>
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I wish Turkey was on...(*Turkey's cue....*)
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I said *Turkey's cue*!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: phooey.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: bored again...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: still mad, still alone.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: still alone, still mad.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: does anyone wonder what they'll be like when they're older?
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: (oh, no...not the 'I wonder' thing again...)
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: Rat's being mean and Turkey isn't on...I wonder why all my friends are animals?
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOD!!! my tummy growls...I'm not motivated enough to eat though...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I'm lazy.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I should make my very own wiki for this...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: unless people like this...?
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: if not, what should the name be? I honestly have no idea...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: *sneezes, has stroke of inspiration...maybe just stroke*
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: muffin!!
2005-02-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in and lies a $100000000000 bill on the bar- [strongest blood drink ya got] -she sits down woundering if bob is there-
2005-02-26 [Acidic Khemica]: *looks at white*holy fuck
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: yes, bloody mary's all around.
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight... more comments! need more comments! HAR HAR HAR HAR!!!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: alright then...OTHER MUFFIN!!!
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: I've been watching cheep old movies from my shelf... barney, power rangers, mystic knights...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: gee, I seem to be doing the majority of the commenting on this wiki...it's slowed down or something. no chickens.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I gave all my movies away...I'm tired of movies. even movies I haven't seen before have predictable storylines.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: comments have vanished...O.o
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: must
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: talk
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: more
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: than
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: [nokaredes]
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: nearly
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: impossible
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: to
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: do
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: though
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust down the door and order some punkin pie*
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: ah, nevermind. and you'll never beat me!! muahahaha!!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: pie!!
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yay!! pie i want some pie!
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dunno i might bat you if i babble nough
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: though i bet it would be hard to be at you bc your a master babbler
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: the only hard part really is finding something to babble about
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: now if some one will give me some thing to babble about i might be able to do some thing
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: tho babbleing isnt something you can just do
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: its a refined art and must be approached carefully
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: in order to babble successfuly you must talk and talk and talk and never say ne thing important
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: in other words you must be able to spew shit out of your mouth for an untold time span
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: seeing as no ones going to babble back at me i guss ill just have to babble o myself
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: it worked for her...
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *attempts to read some previous comments*
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well yes it worked for her
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: she is a master babbler
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: [Acidic Khemica], yesh, nekkid Turkey! I hadn't realised...[nokaredes]: nu uh! your just jealous of my hand-turkey! you want to steal him!
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i wish i was a master babbler
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: of course then i want to be alot of things...
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: someone should make a master babbler badge for her...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i would but my scanners broke and i dont like using paint shop for stuff like that
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: everyone's scanners are busted apparently...it's a scanner epidemic!
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: your name is spelled wrong...
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I remember because of that commercial..."I'd like to send this to Pah Hoe Nix please."
2005-02-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: or what ever he said...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: well, if someone has to give you something to babble about, then it's not really babbling, is it? Tap, yes, I do want your nekkid-hand-turkey!! it's mine! MINE! muahahaha!! ooh, a badge?! damn scanner epidemic...Pahoenix! :D
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: gee, that was a long comment...and the randomest non-blendyist!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I want some more Sobe...or some fruit...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: Cranberry sauce!!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: we still have some from Thanksgiving...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: heck, we still have our turkey!! in the freezer!!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: a description is 750 pixels wide...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: my name isnt spelled wrong its not ment to be "phoenix" as in the bird. its pronounced different like "fee-O-nicks" thats bout as close as i can show it bc my keyboard doesnt hav all those diff keys
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I wish I still had my art program...grr
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: mmmm this coffee im drinking tastes GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: definately not from bobs
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: the keys aren't on the keyboard, you silly! just imagine how big that keyboard would be! you get them by pushing two buttons at once, just like how you get an exclamation point...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: my alt key isnt set and ctrol is only set to the defaults like c&p Print save open select all so on and so on
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: but it's not the same as microsoft word, so i don't know what buttons...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: ctrl & end doesn't always want to word here...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: besides word pad (which is on every comp) all i have is microsoft word =(
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: me too...what else is there?
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: um i dunno the exact names but i think most of them are extender programs for microsoft word. theres some that allow you to type in other languages and others allow you to type with the alt keys and stuff like that
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: oh, right...I have something...the French dictionary add on and the alt codes...I also used to have a better version of Paint called Paint It and that was cool...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yeah... i wish i had the alt codes if nothing else
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: if you go to the Insert menu and click Symbol, it'll give you a whole big chart of characters...
2005-02-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: k thankees well i g2g 4 now byes
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters*
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: *gives Turkey a biiiiiiiiig hug*
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: sorry, I'll have to arrest you... you are one " i " over the limit...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: ooh, handcuffs...
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: ?!?!
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: ^_^
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: everyone I talk to has a scanner that's broken and had a bad yesterday...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: hey, Turkey, what'd you get yesterday? anything good?
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... only $35...
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: my scanner works... I think...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: well, I know someone who got 'the Talk' for her last birthday...then I'm coming to use it! wait...that would be against the point...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: (no, not me)
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: :D sooooooo...
2005-02-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: how... interesting...?
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: exactly.
2005-02-26 [nokaredes]: I'm making graphics!!
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: good for you...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: gee, you sound grouchy...
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... this is my normal sarcastic mood...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: O.o you're starting to remind me of my friend Rat...and since when are you normal?
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... RAT?!?!
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: [Dead_Alewives]
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: mass visiting of his house shall now comence.
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: *starts a hi chain* hi
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: ya know, Turkey, you having BD in your mood makes it really easy for me to get here and be random...
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... I'll change it...
2005-02-27 [la vie lemon]: Knucklehead! yea, that's her...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: who told you where this wiki was?
2005-02-27 [la vie lemon]: *points at [Sagacious Turkey]* him!
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: WHY?!?!?! ;_;
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: Emily, go away. Find your own wiki. STOP FOLLOWING ME!!
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: are you scaring away customers?!
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: Just that one.
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: She stalks me.
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuure she does...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: You don't believe me?
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: I don't know... just making conversation...
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: YES!!!!!!!!I'M BACK!!!!!!!(?)
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: how many new messages did you have?!
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: .......92.........*eats ramen*......
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!?! *mumbles* liar...
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: sez you.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: prove it... go back and take a screen shot by pressing the "PRINT SCRN/SYSRQ" and pasting it on paint and saving it and uploading it...
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: can not compute....self-destruct in 30 minutes......*eats last cup of ramen*.....
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: imma destruct you on monday...
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! imma send you an envelope filled with popcorn! HAR HAR HAR!!!
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: riiiiiiiiiiiight.......*gets the cole slaw that winked at you in my fridge and buries it in the backyard*........*and eats ramen*.....
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! NOT TIMMY!!! YOU KILLED TIMMY!!!
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: saturday night live is on...
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight......*eats ramen*.....and i care?....
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: *gos outside and stabs Timmy reapededly with a haircomb named Toothy*.......*and eats ramen*....
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-02-27 [Phil Crooked]: no more reefer
2005-02-27 [Sir Soapy]: ????????
2005-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: rrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.........*eats ramen*...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: yep...SNL was on...and weed's cool, man!
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: *giggles insanely*
2005-02-27 [la vie lemon]: but it was a repeat.
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: but a funny repeat...
2005-02-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: indeed...
2005-02-27 [nokaredes]: twinkle twinkle, baby, twinkle twinkle!
2005-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: rrrrrriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.......*reburies the cole-slaw,named "Timothy" by [Sagacious Turkey],and begins to stab it with a pitchfork*..........*eats ramen*.....
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: you name your moldy food? O.o (Emily don't say anything!)
2005-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I didn't name it,twas turkey......*eats ramen*....and who is this "Emily" you speak of?
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: [la vie lemon], who Turkey was so generous to invite to this last wiki she didn't know about...I might just leave it because she is here.
2005-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!?!......you wouldn't dare....*eats ramen*.......do you hate her?if so,why?
2005-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: rrrrrrrrriiiiiiiiiight.....*eats ramen*....
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: I would too dare. Blame Turkey. I don't hate her, she's my friend, but she needs to visit her OWN wikis.
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: I don't know how you'll live without me (and my brainless babbling), because I have to fix something every single time someone edits this page...
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... people can edit this page... why else would I tell everyone the password is kitty?!
2005-02-28 [la vie lemon]: why would you put a passwrod at all then?
2005-02-28 [la vie lemon]: hey, wait...you're gonna leave?! I have my own wikis!
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: to keep "hooligans" away...
2005-02-28 [la vie lemon]: then why would you tell these "hooligans" the password?
2005-02-28 [la vie lemon]: would you tell me your password if I asked?
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: probably...
2005-02-28 [la vie lemon]: haha, you put "Sugar Power" up! and why would I mention "Joey", the mouldy chicken wing...?
2005-02-28 [la vie lemon]: see, now why would you do that? everybody would...it's odd.
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust in and drag lemon into the streets*
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: Emy!!!
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: hmph.
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: *clicks 'stop watching this wiki'*
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: HA HA HA HA HAAA!!! oh... are you serious...? HA HA HA HA HA HAA!!!
2005-02-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Welcome back [Sagacious Turkey]....How have you been?
2005-02-28 [Phil Crooked]: lol happy b-day turkey
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... almost sorta remotly decent...
2005-02-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Alright....[Sagacious Turkey] Today is your Birthday?
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: *pokes Turkey* of course I was serious! *pokes darkness* no, Friday! *pokes Emily, on the comp. at 3am* go away!
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: but it's still in your mood...so...
2005-02-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh...[nokaredes] How are you?.....Puts money in the cash box....I need some of my coffee....I can not stay awake
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: meh...annoyed.
2005-02-28 [Beo-Wulf]: well....It was a long day...I am going to [Clock Out]....Y'all Take Care
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: I just had to post this:
2005-02-28 [nokaredes]: 
2005-02-28 [Phil Crooked]: lmfao
2005-02-28 [Beo-Wulf]: LoL........[nokaredes]
2005-02-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *falls over anime style at the mindless-ness of it all*
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm taking this wiki down... Vil vs. Ramen-Eater...
2005-02-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: FOMAL!!
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: wha...?
2005-02-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: "Falls On My Ass Laughing"
2005-02-28 [Acidic Khemica]: odd.........
2005-02-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: very
2005-02-28 [Acidic Khemica]: just maybe it is just alittle....to much
2005-02-28 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: well it's what i like so i'll post it haha -laughs- just kidding
2005-02-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I took those suckers down...
2005-03-01 [bloodstonedragon]: wassup eva one the Rat Catcher is back been gone a while menu hasnt changed much
2005-03-01 [nokaredes]: hey
2005-03-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yeah well your not on the staff yet so dont expect to get paid
2005-03-01 [bloodstonedragon]: hey i dont have to be on the staff turkey told me i could be rat catcher and i dont expect anything but a pixie burger everyday for lunch
2005-03-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: uh pixie hasnt been here for like a month
2005-03-01 [nokaredes]: pixie...?
2005-03-01 [bloodstonedragon]: so i know she got banned and comes on under another name got it in my friends list baut cant remember it
2005-03-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you avoiding me in K P U?
2005-03-01 [bloodstonedragon]: no yoshi i aint avoiding you just tryin to update the comp talk on yahoo messenger and on here at the same time
2005-03-01 [la vie lemon]: uh...pixie?
2005-03-01 [nokaredes]: I've already said that Emy!
2005-03-01 [sara(:]: *walks in* hey everyone!!
2005-03-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey "moon_fire"... or so you claim...
2005-03-01 [Acidic Khemica]: ..........
2005-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: rrriiiiiiiiiiight....*eats ramen*...
2005-03-01 [nokaredes]: I can't get in to Habbo...computers hate me.
2005-03-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: excuses excuses...
2005-03-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *is back* been takin a few days to maself.....been trying to get used to [Beo-Wulf] working....
2005-03-01 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits down*
2005-03-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits by herself* I miss my master.....*howls sadly*
2005-03-01 [Acidic Khemica]: .....?
2005-03-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-02 [Acidic Khemica]: yea
2005-03-02 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares]....Umm I mean Ginger, Your master is right here
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: Turkey, quit poking me with things on the Thundercats wiki! You're gonna get us both in trouble.
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha! sucker... If I weren't me, I wouldn't like me very much...
2005-03-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks off in search of her master*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: O.o yea, I can tell.
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiight......*eats ramen*...
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight... (see the message I'm about to send you)
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: uhm...suuuure...
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: rriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....*eats sushi....er.....i mean.....eats ramen*......
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: I like sushi...even if it is overpriced.
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh well... let go eat sushi or somthing!!! yay!
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: don't leave me by myself!! (you know what happens...)
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: darn milk-chan!.....*eats over-priced sushi*....
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *pokes nc*
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: don't you poke me!*pokes back *.....
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *pokes nc*
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: {(°•º)}
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: mr. koala!!!
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *pokes nc*
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: what did i tell you,young man-er i mean-girl?
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: now were you talking to nc or me when you said you were going to send a message?
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots turkey*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *pokes nc*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: .......*eats ramen*...
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: nc... sup ma homie?! *shoots your eye*
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots harmonie*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: hey, according to  most ETers are 15 y/o ...
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: oh yeah-S'UP,MAN?!*stabs turkey*
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: hey!i'm only 9 y/o.....
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: some weird person is being too pushy...'she' wants to know too much. neither of you would know what that's about, would you? (Turkey...)
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: m
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: you mean that lemony person?
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: no, 'that lemony person' is my neighbor, she already knows all that.
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: well, she's my neighbor except when she's in LONDON!! (srry, bit of anger there... ^_^;)
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.......*eats ramen*....
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *pokes nc*
2005-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *pokes the harmonious person*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: *bitch slaps nc for calling her by an unacceptable nickname*
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stabs you both*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: O.o not with the same knife, I hope...
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: poor ol' harmonious person... *pats her "back"*
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: wow...this is getting weird, so I'm going to go get some kip in the lounge...O.o
2005-03-02 [nokaredes]: (yes, I amaze you with my British-people-talk ^_^)
2005-03-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ramen party at the confused club!!!
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: asian pride!!!
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Mexican Pride!
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: screw mexicans!!! SUCKERS!!! I can delete your comments! *sticks out tounge*
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: see? HA! sucker...
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...*eats ramen*
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: I can't feel my face.
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: it might be that large leech on there... sucking your blood...
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: SCONES,eh?
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: No, it's the GD wind up here...I swear it's 40mph! and yes, I am a ramen-traitor.
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?! HOW DARE YOU?!
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: Hey, speaking of ramen, if found a second store of it in my room today while I was ransacking it, so I officially have way too much, so Turkey, if that's your real address, you'll be getting about 50 of them in the mail...if I feel like getting off the bus to stop at the post office...
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chases the "oh mighty harmonious one" with a chainsaw*
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: the supreme elegant mighty harmoniously harmonious being
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: -.- see, you're trying to annoy me, and it won't work
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: will insulting annoy you "supreme elegant miraculous flawless harmoniously harmonious immortal"?
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: uhm...not right now. ^_^ unless you would like to join me in a game of 'kick the guy who decided that no one would want to play the song Gifts and Curses on the violin'...
2005-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.......
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: If I ever find out who decided that...*waves sledgehammer*...he's goin' down!
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: so...*pokes Turkey*...what flavor ramen do you want? I have mostly shrimp and oriental.
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... poor ol' supreme beautiful elegant miraculous marvelous providential flawless harmoniously harmonious immortal queen...
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: regular! or oriental... shrimp sucks...
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: regular? I've never heard of this 'regular' you speak of...there's chicken, there's beef, there's mushroom...etc.
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: CHICKEN!!!
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: O.o I'm standing right here...
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh? I thought you were over there...
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: No I'm not...I could be here, I could be there, I could be almost anywhere. I could be looking in your window right now...
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: stalker!!!
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh wait... that's not true... I'm looking in your window! *waves*
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: I actually looked around, just to be sure...idiot. You better watch out, in two years I'm coming to get you...
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: not even two years...one and three-quarters.
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: I will bring much Maryland-priced chicken-flavored ramen.
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: Emily, who gets out six months before me, will bring the scones. *reaches elastic arm to London to poke her*
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *takes your arms and whacks you with them*
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: but I said 'arm' not 'arms'...
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: I have 240 minutes left on my cell...I need to go charge it, I've talked my voice away today (b/c I could ^_^)
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: Stress: the confusion created when the mind overrides the body's basic desire to choke the crap out of somebody who desperately deserves it.
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: Now how will I sneak a giant box of ramen out of the house...?
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... ha! I said "riiiiiiiiight"! that sure is funny...
2005-03-03 [la vie lemon]: scones? right, yes, scones...
2005-03-03 [la vie lemon]: do you have free long-distance?
2005-03-03 [la vie lemon]: shrimp kicks ass, Turkey, and don't you forget it.
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: nuh uh! oriental!
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: Alcopop Lemonade! I know what that is...! 'depends on how much you drink'! *dissolves into fits of laughter*
2005-03-03 [la vie lemon]: shrimp!
2005-03-03 [la vie lemon]: hh, quizzari yoya saradriel mi y aeolean yurt du Turkey?
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: *eiko nixozied* yoya ignignokt?! cala gratselab! :D // oriental!
2005-03-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... are you making fun of me?!
2005-03-03 [nokaredes]: nope. (<--not sarcasm, for once)
2005-03-04 [Phil Crooked]: je tencule paulet
2005-03-04 [la vie lemon]: do you actually know what you said or are you mindlessly spouting French?
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: he cures our...something. O.o?
2005-03-04 [Phil Crooked]: i said fuck you chicken
2005-03-04 [Acidic Khemica]: .................
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: you did? in French?
2005-03-04 [Phil Crooked]: yeah
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: Ce sont des conneries. ^_^
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: votre mère!!!
2005-03-04 [Phil Crooked]: i do not know what that says lol but i know je suis tre chaud
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: your hot?
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: Turkey speaks French! :D
2005-03-04 [Phil Crooked]: lol oui tre , hmm paulet biere , sounds bon
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: me too. sweater + library = hotness
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... * mange ramen *...
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: stupide Français...
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: *covers her ears* I can't hear this atrocious French...lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalala...
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ¡entonces español! ¿sepa español?
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: ...lalalalalalalaIwishmyviolinwasn'tintheshoplalalalalala...
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: bored...and I can't kick people with my cast anymore. :(
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: well, I could, but it would hurt.
2005-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: tu madre,pavo!..........era mui buena la otra noche......*come ramen*....
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: QUE?!
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: MY MOTHER WAS GOOD LAST NIGHT?!?! *shoots you*
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: well she is on the menu...
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: *points and laughs*
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *TWITCH!!!*
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm eating week old pizza from my birthday party...
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: ramen-traitor...
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: if I HAD some ramen... but nooooooo...
2005-03-04 [nokaredes]: ^_^ trade ya...
2005-03-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: holy crap.......that pizza from last week?.....i bet it has some mold.....*eatsed raimain*...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: okay, for people who aren't at the confused club, one of my classmates just removed his pants. IN the classroom.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *cheers* that's the way!
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: I wonder how long they'll let him do that...?
2005-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: not for long,i hope!
2005-03-05 [angry bunny]: he he.........i like my name......*evil cackels*..
2005-03-05 [angry bunny]: he he...*talks with an "Igor" type of voice*......must.....eat ......brains....
2005-03-05 [angry bunny]: he he....."poo stew".....*evil cackels*....
2005-03-05 [angry bunny]: he he......must......eat.......................................................food....*looks around the diner that sells "so-called food"*.........there are many inedible substances in here........must ............find ........food............*evil cackles*....
2005-03-05 [angry bunny]: he he.....must.........find..............nutritional substances.........*orders a "[sara(:]'s kitty"*.....mmmmmmmmmmmm.........goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood,......................*evil delightful cackels*..
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ANGRY BUNNY?! WHAT HAPPENED TO HAPPY BUNNY?! FLUFFY BUNNY?! OR EVEN HORNEY RABID BUNNY?!
2005-03-05 [Acidic Khemica]: .....
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't ask...
2005-03-05 [Acidic Khemica]: i wasnt plaining on it
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: angry bunny?! *twitch twitch*
2005-03-05 [Acidic Khemica]: whatever...
2005-03-05 [la vie lemon]: And what's with all the carrots?
2005-03-05 [Acidic Khemica]: *shrugs*
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: What do they need such good eyesight for anyway? :D
2005-03-05 [la vie lemon]: I think that hydrant wasn't there.
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: I think I've paid more than my share. :'D
2005-03-05 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: ahh...Buffy humor. and bunnies. *twitch twitch* anyways, Turkey, your mom's on the menu twice.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ?!
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: more than once even, if you count some of the more vague Lunches...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiiiiiiight... Vin Diesel is into Dungeons and dragons...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: yea I know. >.<; are you?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... are you?!
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... Bob's Diner is a pretty complex wiki for a 13 year old to make...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: >.> maaaaybe...maybe not. // you did it by yourself, did you?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: and yet, I still have no rewards...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: cept for the special pictures... those are pixie's...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: stupid italics won't go away...what do you want in return? (not meant how it sounds...)
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... chocolate pudding!
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: can't send that in the mail, really...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: not if you want to survive after you eat it...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: oooooookkkkkkk... everyone I know hates "The Non Crew"... I'm gonna have to "take them out"...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: they all say they are kind... polite... let me post some recent comments from them...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: poo on them. I already agree, you don't need to post stuff I've already read!
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-27 The Bad Turkey: whoa... since I left, you people have gotten less serious...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-27 kaynec: The owner of the page [Gosu] doesn't want you here so bugger off.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-27 Gosu: Indeed, fuck off.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-27 kaynec: Told you so.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-27 kaynec: Why is he back anyway?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-28 SilverFire: Because he got unbanned, and decided he'd have another go at pissing us all off?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-28 maria121: whos u lot chattin about i wanna chat to u lot
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: well, we don't know your past history with them...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 2005-02-28 SilverFire: No, you don't.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: *pokes you* talk about something else and ignore them.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ignore them, you say... wouldn't it be easier just to find out a guards password and ban them all...?
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: [229540] and no, people've done that before and it doesn't work for long.
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: *pokes Turkey with a stick* still alive?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: no...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: trying to find [Gosu]'s password...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: -.- that's mature...*can't express any other feelings without being rude* *goes back to the forums*
2005-03-05 [Phil Crooked]: lol damn freshman
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: ...fresh...man...?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I think I'll just learn to hack...
2005-03-05 [Phil Crooked]: lol im a freshman and i migh tbe a lil " off " tonight so dont ask why the chipmunk is never blue
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: ...the kitty climbs the tree at sunrise...
2005-03-05 [Phil Crooked]: you can by my manhood lol IN THE MISTS OF THE SUNSET LIES A OCEON OF BLOOD AND DAMNATION said the goat
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: 'learn to hack' Turkey? why not learn to ignore assholes? you'll never ban them all, even if you find a guard's pass...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: I'm a freshman too, except we might be talking about different kinds of 'freshman'...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: *pokes you* give it up.
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: there's something interesting (to me anyway) on [Mrcalifornia]'s page...who can find it first?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn... all I've learned is how to hack "netware"... or I could pay a professional hacker...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: *cough* wouldn't know any of those...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mumble* I'm going to bed...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: what?! it's only 2:36am...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: I feel betrayed. XS
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: hmph.
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: *walks in and sits on a random person*
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmpf! *cough*
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: I said person...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: \/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/\/
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: wtf?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't ask...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: you say that too much...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: lotsa people like cheese in the forums...maybe someone should add something cheesy to the menu. (unless we already have something cheesy and I'm blind and didn't see it...)
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: CHEESE!!! YAY!!!
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: the literal cheese cake...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: Cheez-Its! Yay!
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: cheese flavored ramen...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: I now own the hate wiki... that's gonna make ol' [SilverFire] mad...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: what the hack does "nokaredes" mean?
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: 'nokaredes'? who wants to know?
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: that isn't my UN anymore...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: but whats it mean?
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: hmmm...that's a tough one.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: what's 'nostrahan iara' mean?
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: ah, nostalgia...I miss being 'nostrahan iara'...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-05 [Lean]: hi its [Lean] cum c me and ill cum u
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: I should change my UN back.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: you do that...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: That's really...something [Lean]...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: hmmm...what to vote?
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: Look what I can do!! [#Jerkey Turkey] I knew reading the forumposts would come in handy...^_^
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *goes to get the other turkey to join bob's diner*
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: It's not a member, it sends you to the thing on the menu 'A Jerky Turkey' ^_^
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: that explains it...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: you thought it was a bug, didn't you?
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... [#jerkey turkey]...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... when I click it, nothing happens...
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: what if I were to create a user named #jerkey Turkey... then what would happen? (besides go to it's house)
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: really? try [#]
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: that should send you to the top of the page.
2005-03-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: that works...
2005-03-05 [nokaredes]: [#"KNUCKLEHEAD"] ?
2005-03-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope...
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: Here is something.
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: [#something] should take you to that...what browser are you in?
2005-03-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: who knows...
2005-03-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: no, don't work... only [#] did...
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: how do you not know what browser you're in...? oh well. back to talk of chickens, not tech ;)
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: and strange Saturday night pizza...
2005-03-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay week old pizza! *eats pizza*
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: no, just-been-cooked pizza...
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: we should put up some sort of disclaimer...'Theses people are crazy and this wiki involves chickens'...or something.
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: Did you know that Nestle is the same company that makes Tidy Cats brand cat litter? For some reason, I find that's funny...
2005-03-06 [nokaredes]: 
2005-03-06 [Angelic nightmares]: .............
2005-03-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: 208... what area code is that? *wants to track down that phsyco turkey eater and eat him to show him how it feels*
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: Idaho. *ish master of area codes*
2005-03-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *starts walking toward Idaho* imma get you!!! in a few years...
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: it wouldn't take you years to walk to Idaho...besides, you could always hitchhike...
2005-03-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: you've never seen me walk...
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: true.
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: btw, as long as [la vie lemon] is willing to drive me and my cast down to the post office (*hint hint*) I could post your ramen tomorrow...(*hint hint*)
2005-03-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... oriental (*hint hint*)..
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: oh, now you want oriental?? make up your mind! *shakes fist* what happened to chicken?
2005-03-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh? you have chicken? mmm... chicken... (*hint hint*)
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey*
2005-03-07 [Angelic nightmares]: *stands on the edge of a bridge wondering if she should jump or not*
2005-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.........
2005-03-07 [nokaredes]: *pousses nc-17*
2005-03-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats rainmen*
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ¡Oye vaca gorda!!! sí usted, chavez... usted ha hecho algo en "?" todavía?
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: area code 208 is in southern Idaho... east of Boise... north of Idaho falls... well, I'm off to kill some Idahoians! *walks off*
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: We're called Rockvillians here, but I prefer Rockvillains. It sounds more sinister to me. ;)
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: here, we're called rednecks!
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: >.>
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: hayuck!
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: I am not reading those replies to my forum posts...I have 6!
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: how much ramen do you plan to send me?!
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: as of 5:31pm EST, I put 24 packs in the mail ^_^
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: I couldn't figure out the postage...there's probably twice as many stamps as I needed on the boxes...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!
well... I'll have to give [Mortified Penguin] 12 of em'...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: like in Harry Potter!
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha... she covered it with stamps...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: I'm bad with math...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: dude, 24 would probably last me a week...and a half.
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight... you know, 5 out of 4 people have problems with fractions...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: what just happened?
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: who knows...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: almost to 5000 comments...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: c
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: o
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: m
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: people were looking at me weird in the post office...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll finish my "comment" comment later... you did send it to the right address, right?
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: what did you send it in?
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: yep...had Emy log in as me, I trust her more ^_^; boxes (with blue ink)
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... don't you have to pay s&h?
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: you'll know why I mentioned the ink when you see the ink. // stamps. $11 worth in stamps. stamps are why I rarely post anything. >.<
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: stupid stamps... *shoots stamps* uh oh... those were expensive stamps...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I think I'll write you a letter...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: I got the stamps for free. (here Emy, reading over my shoulder says, 'add a bag of $20 worth of stamps that you're always complaining about not being able to find.') I used to run this penpal thing, and all the stamps that weren't marked, I kept. it's kinda like cheating...next time, I'm putting your address on the from part and mine on the to part and not putting stamps. then, they'll 'return to sender' ^_^
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: yay! a letter!
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: report cards come out soon... if I'm not on for a while, it means I got a "C"...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: O.o oookaaay...we don't get report cards anymore! not that I've ever made a 'C'...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: stupid math..
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: I'm pretty good at math in school...with calculators... // now other people are asking me to mail them ramen! look what you started!
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: [jaderii] says ramen is $1-$5 where she lives!!!!!!!!!!
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: She's in Louisiana!! x_x
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha... I'll get nc-17 to write part of the letter...
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: Did you know that B's D in CatHug has been nominated for a spot in the The Scratching Post???
2005-03-08 [nokaredes]: Okay...something weird. I just got the packages I sent back. Quote: 'With so many stamps, they thought it was connected to terrorism.' Unquote. I have to go back, open it in front of the whoever, and get metered something-or-other.
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok...? I nominated B's D on cathug...
2005-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! Bob's Diner is an example on Wiki nominations!
2005-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight......*eats ramen*....
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey there crumb brain... you forgot the digimon movie again...
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: noooooooo......you forgot to give me the video....*eats ramen*....
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooooooo... you forgot to get it!!!
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: vice-versa!!!....*eats ramen*.......so what's this i here about packages?
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: she put too many stamps on the ramen... they thought she was a terrorist... har har!
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightnot so bright is she.....just kiddin'!
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuuuure you are...
2005-03-09 [Jay Ladlehaus]: Actually the really bright ones are the people who sent it back instead of having the police confiscate it. What if it was a terrorist package and it ended up hurting someone on the way back?
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: .......love hina downloads are awesome!....*eats love hina-lettered ramen with traditional naruto whirl-pool fish cakes*.....mmmmm........
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......riiiiiiiight......*eats love hina ramen*...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats love hina*
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: How did you get to be watching this wiki Blue?? Ack! It's being taken over! Anyways...the situation has been rectified. Even got one of 'em sent for free! Am I good, or am I good?
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: your good...*eats ramen*..
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: go to woodlandmaze!
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: all night long... ha! j/k... or am I?
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: already told er' to...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: we are the hornets! the horny, horny, hornets! gooooooo hornets!
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: very weird wiki...is there a way not to die?? I'd keep looking, but I have over 10 forum replies today...I should start reading them sometime soon...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... check out the damage we've done... new paths...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: new B's D poll... TAKE IT!!!
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: gee, I wonder why we are the two that are on, and we are the ones who have one vote each...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... voted for yourself... how selfish...
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: the person I would vote for isn't in the poll...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: who? I'll add em'... read # 46 five times fast...
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: #46 where?
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: I can say that! :P
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: aaaaaaannnnnnnnddddddddd... who would you vote for...?
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: someone who's not on the poll. are you ever going to take your mother off of the menu?
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... who is it?!
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: someone who's not in the poll!!
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: TELL ME!!!
2005-03-09 [Phil Crooked]: thats confusing i think you should idk couse i dont know anyuone else in there but turky and hyper so idk ill vote for some one one day eventually maybee
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: nah nah nah nah nah-nah...
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: where'd everyone go? ...you day people disgust me. *walks off, muttering*
2005-03-09 [la vie lemon]: *and making other squirrel-like noises*
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: har har.
2005-03-09 [PixieStickChick]: I know who would make a good manager, but she's not up there
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: :D
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm in school right now!
2005-03-09 [nokaredes]: OMG! Like I've never done that before...
2005-03-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: so that's why you took so long in the library... you disgust me...
2005-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.........
2005-03-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: لاخلاطس يهىثق... arabic version of B's D... under construction...
2005-03-10 [nokaredes]:  *retches*
2005-03-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch* that guy should join Bob's Diner...
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: whoa......that was a weird "diary".....
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm never going to accept any food from you... and we can only hope hyperharmonie is a real girl...
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ......that has brought up new ideas in my head......i'm currently working on 'Assassin School'......3rd chapter.....
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! ARE YOU GOING TO MAKE ASSASSIN SCHOOL RATED R?!
2005-03-11 [Acidic Khemica]: maybe
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: NO!!!YOU SICK FREAK!!!!.......what i meant to say that brung up ideas about harmony being a boy......
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!........a new, larger book to waste my time and brain cells on!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *runs around in circles and collapses of hyperventalation*
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: yay hyperventalation!*does the same*
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... crookshanks could be dumbledore, but the lady that sold him to hermione said he had been in there for years and nobody had bought him...
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: and that just wouldn't make sense... you know what this means! to the internet!
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: been rereading books,have we?
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *runs off*
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: come back here,feind!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: um... er... chicken!
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: darn you!.....*mutters*....always eating chicken.....
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: even yayer!!! star wars 3 trailer comes on in an hour!!!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: I tried to call you earlier, but your line was busy...
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!?!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...three words... GET YOUR OWN CELL PHONE!!!
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: how about you?
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... *steals a phone* got one!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: dis gosu... my wiki, so insult them all you want!
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight......
2005-03-11 [nokaredes]: of course I'm a real girl...or a puppet. and it's harmonie. AND I have my very own cell phone! *sticks out tongue*
2005-03-11 [nokaredes]: [259962]: There is also specutlation that James Potter and Remus Lupin switched bodies via a switching spell (which is a reoccuring theme in her books(Switching spells I mean)) and that Remus was the one who really died the night that Harry's parents were killed and that it is James who is actually in Remus's body.....Some people have way too much time on their hands.
2005-03-11 [nokaredes]: pijmy szybko, bo nam krasnoludki wypijg...
2005-03-11 [nokaredes]: B's D is on the Myaustreet at CatHug YAY!!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! I BETTER BE MENTIONED!!!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha! I am mentioned...
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT ABOUT ME?!?!I MADE UP THE NAME!!!!!!!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: GO SCREW YOURSELF!!!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: have you written on the letter yet?
2005-03-11 [The username is used]: sup?!
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: how do you upload a picture to the comments?
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: you right click on the picture, click Properties, and copy the address... then when you paste it, put "" at the end...
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: no!one of MY pictures.....
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: oooooookkkkkkkk... click "upload new 0picture" on your house... then click "browse" and find it... click open on it then click "upload"...
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I wonder if lerune forgot to unban me... brb...
2005-03-11 [The Bad Turkey]: YES!!! SHE MUST HAVE FORGOT TO BAN ME AGAIN!!! PARTY!!! *boogies*
2005-03-11 [The Bad Turkey]: dis gosu
2005-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: check out my house!
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm scared to... I'm busy making new names...
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: you had to put "[Mortified Penguin]!!!" didn't you...?
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh yeah! I forgot about www.worlds.com
2005-03-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... what do I do there?
2005-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: poo.....
2005-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... get on worlds... I'm the_bad_turkey...
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm a large bird in black robes...
2005-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: HAHYAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: what's your name?
2005-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...........poo........
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! really...
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: You know, you seem to have less interesting conversations when I'm not here...(or, when my SC&C teacher doesn't tell us what building to go to...)
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... we're just too intellectually deep for you to understand...
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: El Malo Pavo sounds more sinister than "the bad turkey"...
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: not really...
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: :p
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: I'm thinking about leaving ET...
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: and why would this be...? no one can ever leave entirely... they all come back...
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: well, what I'm thinking about doing is making an account where I say I am older, and ditching this one...I'm tired of people hating me for being a teenager and telling me I'm not old enough to join their wikis (*coughelvenwood silver years clubcough*)
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *coughthe blank wikicough*
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: They don't hate people because they're young...[Aradon Templar]'s 15 y/o.
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: besides...I can be immature if I want to...*thinks*...
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: I know... but they said he's an acception... they told me I was too young...
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeeessss!!! 5000 comments and I didn't even notice! time to go redo my figurings...
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: I don't have to talk about Dubya and Iraq and the Da Vinci code and whether or not there is a God (or Goddess) eye dunt hav 2 spell write and I can listen to weird things like Weird Al Yancovic or however the hell his name is spelled...I can threaten people and have to do community service for it...I can watch Charmed! but right now I have to clean the kitchen. >.>
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: about 32 comments a day... we need more commenting!!! (that's just with a lot of rounding)
2005-03-12 [nokaredes]: I wonder if Lysol is flammable...
2005-03-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *goes to find out*
2005-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: poo!!!!
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes back in flames* well, I learned my lesson...
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ha ha !SUCKER!!
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *lights you on fire*
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: you have no lysol!
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... *tackles you* ha! we're both on fire!
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: *yells like the science teacher* Stop drop and roll! Stop drop and roll!
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: rolls! yay! *eats the science teacher*
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: notice how I said the science teacher, not a science teacher...
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: I have a question that ought to inspire lots of new comments...
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeeeeeessss?
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: If you had superpowers, which ones would they be?
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: I guess no one likes that one...
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: meat vision!
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: oh, it's too late to answer now...I've given up on the subject, and you can't redeem yourself by using superpowers from the Fairly Oddparents...
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn...
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: sweet vision!!!
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: what? O.o?
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: I would want invisibility and superspeed (even if superspeed makes you age faster...) I'd give anything to not see dead people...
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: Turkey, I bet I found a forum you'd like...  (Harry Potter)
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: hey, it even adds its own (Harry Potter)...
2005-03-13 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Who wouldn't want invisibility? I think I'd like powers of time, like to freeze time. and I'm old enough to join Elvenwood...probably the nameless wiki too ")
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: where'd you come from?
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: Technically Tap, you're five ^_^ (She's commented before, you idiot...)
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: I just inhaled hot chocolate powder...up my nose >.<
2005-03-13 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Well, I suppose, if you wanted to get all technical...and where else would you inhale hot chocolate powder? o.O?
2005-03-13 [Tapestry of Destiny]: No, wait, don't answer that.
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: Yes I do want to get technical...hehe >.>
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: i feel indifferent.....
2005-03-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: good for you...
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: see? it's boring without me...where'd everyone else go though? [Beo-Wulf] and [Angelic nightmares] and [PixieStickChick] and [sara(:] and [Acidic Khemica]...?
2005-03-13 [Tapestry of Destiny]: we all seem to be here one-at-a-time, and that's never any fun. >.<;
2005-03-13 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Don’t flush a plane toilet while seated. In 2001, a passenger flying across the Atlantic on a Boeing 767 became vacuum- sealed to a toilet seat after flushing. (Mechanics were later able to pry her loose after the aircraft landed.)
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: lmfao!
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: im here it's just most never see me
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: she's a shy feller......
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: im not shy
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ok........QUIET feller....
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: -.-
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.............
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *glares*
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: hey, I know! let's tie him up and torture him! *evil grin*
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *grins*im up for that
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *glares intently while wearing sunglasses so he can look at body parts that are not supposed to be looked at knowing that she will get mad*........
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: -.- i dont like being looked at.....
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.......ha!im not tied up!
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *grabs him by the throat*
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes out a dagger he really bought at a flea market today and stabs you*
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: * knocks nc out from behind*
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *grins and steps back looking at the blood*
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: *ties the unconscious nc-17 up*
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *the stab wound heals*i try to tell people
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: i'm unconscious?
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: *superglues his hands to the chair*
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: I knocked you out...but I guess you're awake now.
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: lol....
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: Good! It's no fun if you're asleep...now, there are 5 basic areas of torture: blunt, sharp, cold, hot, and loud. Have a preference?
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *pimp slaps [nokaredes] and [Acidic Khemica]....and just for the heck of it [Sagacious Turkey]*...HAHAHA!!!!
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: You can't pimp slap me, you're superglued to the chair! Do it right, or I'll come and visit.
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: i didn't say what i pimp slapped you with,now did i?
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *rolls eyes and listens to marilyn manson*
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *pimp slaps everyone with a foot*HA!
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: *glares and stabs your feet to the floor*
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: If I kill him, would that help? Or just be really funny?
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: both
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: both...
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: now isn't that funny?
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: *duck tapes nc's feet to the chair*
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *pimp slaps you with......something...*...HA!!
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: just kill him
2005-03-13 [nokaredes]: Oh, that's great. It's always better with audience participation. May I take your order please?
2005-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ?!
2005-03-13 [Acidic Khemica]: ?
2005-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: i would like an order of dignity and pleasure to go please!
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: Oh, sorry, we don't have any of that. Please try again. ")
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: Would you rather play a game? You know that’ll add some excitement to all of this...We’ll play hide and seek! I haven’t played that game since elementary school...
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: I guess not.
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: it's no fun online...people don't do it like in real life. I can't get my fix. I need to find some lowlife in person...and walking through the woods or past bars at night doesn't even work anymore, because people recognise me now.. "(
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: and people that didn't, do, because of a certain incident at my college...
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: eh
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: Did you know that Yoda in Revenge of the Sith is completly digital? :D
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: really?
2005-03-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah...
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: interesting i dont watch those movies
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: O.O
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: would you quit raping nc?!
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: 0o?
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: we're not raping him...we didn't get that far yet ^_^
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lmao
2005-03-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: you heard me ")
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: You know what the best movie I've seen in a while is? Red Dragon.
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: eh
2005-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ?!
2005-03-14 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: But Silence of the Lambs is pretty boring except for the very end.
2005-03-14 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and the part where he killed the guards! you can't not think that is the coolest thing ever, if you do I swear...*shakes nc-17's phantom appendage*
2005-03-14 [Tapestry of Destiny]: so what's the shibby, fridays?
2005-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: say what?
2005-03-14 [nokaredes]: Oh, I would never! That is one of the scariest parts in movie history! Did you know that slurping sound he makes was supposed to be a blooper? /// nizza mizza, my fridayzizza. ")
2005-03-14 [Jay Ladlehaus]: There's been lots of interesting bloopers. In Resevoir Dogs, the shootout at the end has four shooting victims, but only three shooters.
2005-03-14 [Tapestry of Destiny]: me either...bored. // Really? Interesting, I must watch that more closely...
2005-03-14 [Jay Ladlehaus]: yeah, apparently it was a mistake the Tarantino decided to leave in. I think it makes it look like Steve Buscemi's character took the opportunity to cap the last survivor and take the diamonds
2005-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *offended noise*
2005-03-14 [sara(:]: quit making those noises....it's quite annoying...
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-15 [nokaredes]: offended noise is my noise!!
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *offended noise*
2005-03-15 [nokaredes]: *thinks about leaving ET*
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *even more offended noise*
2005-03-15 [nokaredes]: you don't have anything to say about me leaving?
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... close the door on the way out!!! har har har!!! your ramen arrived today... I was expecting chicken in the ramen... not chicken flavored ramen...
2005-03-15 [nokaredes]: alright then...*leaves*
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey! get back here! *grabs you with a large candycane*
2005-03-15 [nokaredes]: well, I can't leave just yet--I haven't copied my notes page so I can watch almost all the same wikis and houses yet, and one of the Patrollers is chatting with me.
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... I'm drawing you somthing right now...
2005-03-15 [nokaredes]: Me?
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: no, me!
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: .......mmmmmmm....ramen......*eats ramen*.....
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight... Imma go cook some ramen... and put cheese on it! *squeels with delight*
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Have you realized that you come on ET at 4:10...*ahem*...3:10...every weekday?
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah... soooooooooooo?
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: so?
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: [{(°•º)}] {(°•º)} {(°•º)} KOALA ARMY!!!
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: isn't that strange...? *waits to be ganged up on*
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the koalas gang up on tapestry*
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *gangs up on [Tapestry of Destiny]*
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: wow, that's creepy.
2005-03-15 [Acidic Khemica]: ...
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ganging up on you?...no....that's not creepy..
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: no, but you made almost the same comment at almost the same time...*is watching Sliders and thinks about people from parrallel dimensions*
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *thinks about the bad turkey being the parralell of him*......well....we're best friends since kindergarten and we go to the same school.....
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: aww, what a love story in the making ^_^
2005-03-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *raises an eyebrow*
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: oh, man, that stuff Turkey put on too much time slays me :'D
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: LOVE STORY?!?!ARE YOU SAYING I'M GAY?!?!......you shall die....
2005-03-15 [Tapestry of Destiny]: not if my English teacher doesn't kill me first...! gtg, kk?
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! LOVE STORY?!?! *invents an automatic bazooka and shoots "tapeworm" with it*
2005-03-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Too Much Time... read what I put...
2005-03-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: "Tapeworm"...?
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: you heard me... *shakes fist*
2005-03-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: unlike hh, I am old enough to drive myself down to Alabama and kick your ass...however, also unlike her, I don't know where you live...>.>
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: 3600 su- heeeeeey... why should I tell you?!
2005-03-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ...so...I...can...send you ramen! yea, that's it...
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight... *eats ramen* *coughliarcough*
2005-03-16 [nokaredes]: *bursts into tears*
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh...? *eats ramen*
2005-03-16 [nokaredes]: *cries harder*
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *pokes you with a stick* watcha dooooiiiiin?
2005-03-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *boxes Turkey's ears* you can TELL what she's doing...the question should be WHY.
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooooooo... that's not my question... duh! *pimp slap*
2005-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: sorry everybody!turkey just got out of the institute for mentally unnstable
2005-03-16 [nokaredes]: I can tell.
2005-03-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't make me delete your comments!!!
2005-03-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: you wouldn't do that...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: where is everyone?
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: besides hh, who for some reason keeps crashing computers today...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *hopes she didn't catch whatever hh has*
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight... I see she got my virus... j/k... or am I?
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: well, that would have to be a supernatural virus then, to pass from her home computer to one in class to one here...
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: or whatever she gets on, has a virus attached on it...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: huh?
2005-03-17 [la vie lemon]: yea, huh?
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: huh? wha? I forgot what we were conversing about...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: you can just look back in the comments to see what we were conversating about.
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... it'd take too long...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I'm drawing.
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm sleeping... *snore*
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and Emy just logged off...damn her half-British gizzard. (Yes, we all have problems with Emily being British...DEAL WITH IT! better yet, jump on the bandwagon! dis the British...)
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: stupid british!!!
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: by the way, hh is kicking your ass in the poll...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and she says: "ha! I'm winning! *pokes you*"
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: we'll see about that...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: what're you gonna do...?
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: if I changed my vote to you, you two would be tied...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: never mind.
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: she says she knows what you're doing, and you better wait until tomorrow.
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: tomorrow, she will be on "the best computer in all the land," where none of her clones are banned. (and starts talking tech. and blows my head wiiiide open >.>)
2005-03-17 [The Bad Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight... and you know her how?
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: we're in the same English class. I'm on the phone with her right now! ")
2005-03-17 [The username is used]: suuuuuuuure you are... *is suspicious*
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: on the phone with her, huh? I THINK I'LL CALL HER!!!
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and who are you? *is suspicious*
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: she says: "aaand...? (be sure to add extra a's.)"
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha! I'm winning!
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: you're cheating...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: "wait until tomorrow."
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: what is this, battle of the clone accounts?
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... I swear I won't use any more clones... *coughdon't have any morecough*
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: hh says she doesn't even remember all her clones...that is scary. she also says to remind you to tell her before you send the letter so she can intercept it before it can get into her mom's hands.
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... I'm still working on it...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: she says she has at least seven.
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: not including real people who's passwords she has...
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... I know a lot of passwords...
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: tell her to bring her worst!
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: you guys try too hard...
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I just told her you guys try too hard, and she says I don't get "it". what is "it"?
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't ask...
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: gotta go, ho!
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: see ya, Supreme Beautiful Elegant Miraculous Marvelous Providential Flawless Harmoniously Harmonious Immortal Queen!
2005-03-17 [nokaredes]: Ha! she gave me her password in exchange for mine...you have to leave?
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: huh? whos mama? what? oh well... *leaves*
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *but will return tommorow at 3:10 (4:10 your time... I think...)*
2005-03-17 [nokaredes]: she says she wishes you were in MD. then you could help us commit murder!
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: whyyyyy? ;_; I don't like her account, it's creepy.
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *stares at list of Henwood's from MD* which one is he? darn it!
2005-03-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: hh says "but you're supPOsed to be on until ONE! you're almost always on until one!" (midnight) then she asked me who she's supposed to talk to...while ON the phone with me. >.> and "wasn't Turkey gonna call me?" and something about proving she's really a girl...wtf?
2005-03-17 [nokaredes]: hey Turkey...you're early.
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: huh? wha? *eats a turkey sandwich*
2005-03-17 [nokaredes]: heh.
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ha ha!your knee is bloodier than my dog's diarhea
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: you goin' to the thing tonight? and don't forget to do your history...
2005-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: screw coach caredwell!i'm going to that shindig and gettin' high!yay,high!*begins to roll up a piece of paper*.....don't mind me!
2005-03-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.aftermathanime.net/
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: I forgot my math book in class today, and spent nearly the entire class drawing, and my teacher almost didn't notice. After class, he told me I was doing a good job (AKA he's gonna recommend me to move on and I have a good grade.) My other teachers have already told me the same thing. And I got a wad of paper...I was out, and told one of my teachers that I wanted to draw, and he said 'here, have some paper.' Now if I could only figure out how to draw a phoenix wearing glasses, I'd be sitting pretty...not to mention a hawk and a parrot...I hate drawing birds (no offence to any bad birds in my audience tonight...) But, you know, 'broaden my horizons' and 'learn something new' and all that.
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: birds? that's like the only thing I can draw...
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: then you draw the badges >.>
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: badges? WHAT BADGES?!
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: badges? did I say badges? I didn't say badges...
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiiiiiiiight... *eats laxatives*
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: why...?
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: huh? wha? WHAT ABOUT MY MOM?! riiiiiiiiiiight... *collapses on the floor twitching*
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: yea, whatever.
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh...?
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: okay, okay, quit torturing me! they're badges for the Rogues' Gallery...
2005-03-18 [Tapestry of Destiny]: why isn't anyone here to talk to drunk-off-my-ass me?
2005-03-18 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *buuuurp*
2005-03-18 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I don't think that guy's really drunk...tee hee *falls over*
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: wtf?
2005-03-18 [Jay Ladlehaus]: sorry, tap o'd, I did my Pattie celebrating at a bar.
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: So did Tap...she wasn't there for math last night, either! No one was there to save me from the boredom caused by an extended class! I ended up drawing...chibi-her, actually. ")
2005-03-18 [Jay Ladlehaus]: lol...let's see, I had two green beers, a Guiness draft with my corn beef and cabbage, and I ended the night with an Irish Car Bomb. Yum!
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: I didn't have anything, not that I'd admit it if I had...except for wearing green (so as not to get pinched, because I knew they'd still be doing that...), I treated it as any other day. Have you seen that commercial where they treat it like it's Christmas? That cracks me up...
2005-03-18 [Jay Ladlehaus]: Is that a Guiness or Bailey's commercial? It is pretty funny, but not nearly as funny as the Bud Lite commercial where the dude has his dog on his head and acts like a Rastafarian.
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: Well, we all have our opinions ;)
2005-03-18 [Jay Ladlehaus]: indeed :)
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points to sign at the top of the page* ([#])
2005-03-18 [ikkle sid]: OMG! I'm 4 sale
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens bust down the door, pay, and carry you off*
2005-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *a pride of lions gracefully enter the "diner" and subtly deal with me to carry [Sagacious Turkey] off to their lair where they secretely perform vasectomies*.......*eats ramen*.....
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!?! AS IN MORE THAN ONE VASECTOMY?!?! WHAT AM I?! A MUTANT?!?!
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: ooookaaay...
2005-03-18 [ikkle sid]: lol *runs n hides*
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: maybe he's talking about your clones...
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -runs in and tackles turkey- hey there cold cut!
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey there, ice hole!
2005-03-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grabs him and flips him over her shoulder onto the bar- ya keep it up frost bit~
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: There's an image editor on this computer! :D
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: as you might be able to tell by my mood...
2005-03-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: soooooooo? who doesn't edit images?
2005-03-18 [nokaredes]: some people had to delete their image editors off of their computers so as to keep them running...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: someone talk to me...
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: hi... guards aren't welcome here...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: I'm not a guard...it would be news to me!
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: so I noticed...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: I wouldn't want to be a guard...I don't think so anyway. A Patroller, maybe...
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: which reminds me, [lady nytmare] changed her password...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: *Nelson laugh* ha-ha!
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *goes off to find out your password*
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: you won't be able to...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: OMG, I think he's really trying...!
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: didn't get it, I see...*Nelson laugh*
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... "nelson"...
2005-03-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -watches turkey and hyper with an evil smile-
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: stay away from me!
2005-03-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at turkey- who me?
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: naw... the other White Wolf guardian of snow and ice...
2005-03-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs loudly and glares at turkey- who's gonna stop me?
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles as the gang of chickens bust through the window*
2005-03-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -smiles and shifts into her wolf form running at the chickens bitting down on there necks-
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the floor gremlins attack you from behind*
2005-03-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -rolls on her back mushing them0
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: I can see auras...again...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: Did anyone ever watch the cartoon Reboot?
2005-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: yes....it was funny.....but they took their time in making the other seasons!
2005-03-19 [ikkle sid]: wtf????
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: DEATH TO REBOOT!!!
2005-03-19 [ikkle sid]: *runs n hides*
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chases after you with a flaming torch*
2005-03-19 [ikkle sid]: *screamz n getz rescued by fit man* lol MMMMMMMMMM! x
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: >.<
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: *changes subject* ...you know what I hate? when people suggest a relation with you and don't even have it a week and they delete it.
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: oookkkkkkk...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: heh. I mention because two people have done that this week. anyways...
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks his nose*
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: *knew you were gonna do that*
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuuuuure you did...
2005-03-19 [nokaredes]: ^_^ I...am happy. Nothing can make me mad today! I'm normal...except I have nothing to draw, having temporarily given up on Blue's birds...
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... is that a challenge? *pulls out flamethrower*
2005-03-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think I'll make a quiz for Bob's Diner...
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Quiz
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... NC's CHEATING!!!
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: on the poll...
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: now... take my quiz... Bob's Quiz...
2005-03-20 [Acidic Khemica]: *pokes you*
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *giggles*
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: take the quiz!
2005-03-20 [Acidic Khemica]: quiz?
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... Bob's Quiz
2005-03-20 [WillowWeaver]: *waves* hi..@_@
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah, you better wave! *starts chainsaw*
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *pats you on the head* that's nice dear.
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *carves off your arm*
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: that's ironic...a human-carving turkey XD
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: people don't comment on this wiki enough.
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: average of like 30 somthin' a day...
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: comments, that is...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: well, we don't comment enough (when I am on, anyway...it's a pain to have to go back and look a page or two...)
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: drats... we've gone down... we now average 26.77722772277227722... comments a day...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Ha! I knew it!
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: We'll have to get hh to do one of her wild babbling sessions again...
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: or...I could take a shot at it...>.>
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: umm...I hate the movie Legally Blonde...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: It's a steriotypical movie.
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Like no blondes have ever gone to Harvard...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: okay, what are we up to now?
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... chicken?
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: >.>
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: NOT HIGH ENOUGH!!
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: .
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ..
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ....
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: .....
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ......
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: .......
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ........
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: .........
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ..........
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...........
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ............
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: .............
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: that's enough...
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: 26.9059405940594...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: enough dots maybe,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: "It's evil! Use bleach!"
2005-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-20 [nokaredes]: you get yours early too? darn, I thought it was only me...
2005-03-20 [nokaredes]: 'it's a pain to have to go back and look a page or two...'? yes, I agree.
2005-03-20 [nokaredes]: and I'd babble, but I'm goin' to sleep now...
2005-03-20 [Tapestry of Destiny]: sleep? at 1:30? ......yep. I wonder if Turkey knows what I was talking about yet.
2005-03-20 [ikkle sid]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight - nicked turkeys sayin!!!!
2005-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: meet Mr. Black,a normal white man who pays his taxes,and is never late at work.He constantly strives for perfection.Meet Mr. White,an ordinary black man who owes two years rent of his apartment,currently works at the landromat(psssst....a landromat is a place where people wash their clothes .....but that can't be true....everybody owns a washing machine.....right?) as "towel boy",and has never heard about "tax".
2005-03-21 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -tackles nc- hey there
2005-03-21 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits*
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gags nc with cloth*
2005-03-21 [Acidic Khemica]: lol
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... *scratches chin* whee! *gags akiratetsuo*
2005-03-21 [Acidic Khemica]: uh sad to say you cant gag me i am already dead
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-21 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-03-21 [Acidic Khemica]: ...
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...you can't owe two years of rent...
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure you can!
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: nuh uh!
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh!
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: nuh uh! ...It's True! Plain and Simple!...@.@
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: okay...as soon as I log out, I won't ever be able to come back...
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! why...?
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: I just changed my password to some random mumbo-jumbo...
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... change it again... or make it where you never log out!
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: my mom is asking me where I can stay for August...>.>
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... my house! j/k...
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: O.o
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... riiiiiight...
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...besides, if you make it so you never log out, you still have to log back in if you leave ET to go to another website...
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... gotta go, ho! *walks out*
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: hmph. guess I won't give you this before I go, then...:   
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: Snot-head.
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! hey there ol' buddy! *hands you some money*
2005-03-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: she left, you know...
2005-03-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I just reported someone.
2005-03-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I'm so mean ^_^
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: who was it?
2005-03-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ................why?
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: i dunno...just felt like askin'....
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuuuure you did...
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: riiiiiight....
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: suuuuuuuuure.....
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure...
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.......
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure.....
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure...
2005-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Mr. Black is a member of the CIA,on the verge of becoming a multi-millionaire,and has the exact appearance of James Bond.On the other hand,Mr. White is a drug dealer who has a scar that's bloodier than my dog's diarhea,and hasn't taken a bath or a shower in a year.These two men meet each other in an alley,one day.Tune in tomorrow for the next chapter.
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! quit with the Mr. Black stuff...
2005-03-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *is confused* do you guys have your Spring Break this week too?
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah... eldd ifeh tdnatace hte ldd ide lddidy eh
2005-03-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: -.-
2005-03-21 [nokaredes]: I got's me a temporary password.
2005-03-21 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -stumbles in and stagers over to the bar-
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: watch that fisrt step.....it's a doozy
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-21 [ikkle sid]: okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay then !!!!
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: suuuuuuure.....wait...you interupted...how rude
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: roight...
2005-03-21 [ikkle sid]: interupted wat? ur CrAzY! nwt was goin on that was excitin newayz
2005-03-21 [sara(:]: exactly......*slaps dustin just for the fun of it*( and it is fun)
2005-03-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh yeah?! *slaps back*
2005-03-22 [Tapestry of Destiny]: GEEKFIGHT!!!!!!!!
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ?!
2005-03-22 [Tapestry of Destiny]: heh heh heh...
2005-03-22 [Tapestry of Destiny]: so how's everybody been?
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: I was attacked by wolverines... 12 times... this week... and it's only monday!!!
2005-03-22 [la vie lemon]: I'm glad I don't live in Alabama then...
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't worry... it was just a passing circus...
2005-03-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs and hicups as she takes a long swig of a blood bear- i've just had a bad week....
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *pokes you with a stick*
2005-03-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -snaps at stick but misses and bites his finger- hehe oops
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ow! *pokes you again*
2005-03-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -snaps again but misses again and bites his other finger- hehehhe
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: OW!!! *pokes a few more times*
2005-03-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -snaps each time and bites a finger each time- lMAO
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... *puts the stick in his mouth and pokes you*
2005-03-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -bites head off- ahhhhhhhhh! -spits it out-
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *rolls down a hill* not my best idea...
2005-03-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -puts his head back on healing his fingers too- yuck!!!
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-22 [weasel2]: lalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalal
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: alalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalal...
2005-03-22 [weasel2]: see i told you i did
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight... *shoots you*
2005-03-22 [weasel2]: ha missed im full of holes
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: you're holier than swiss cheese...
2005-03-22 [weasel2]: all i have to do is move and you will miss me
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws an atomic bomb at you* MWA HA HA HA HAA!!!
2005-03-22 [Tapestry of Destiny]: who wants to have a swordfight?
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: you do!
2005-03-22 [Tapestry of Destiny]: >.> I meant besides me...
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... how should I know?
2005-03-22 [Tapestry of Destiny]: we're having fun with your head smackers wiki...
2005-03-22 [ikkle sid]: wtf?
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: *walks in* hello evryone
2005-03-22 [ikkle sid]: HI!
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: well hi!
2005-03-22 [ikkle sid]: hwz u?
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: fine and yourself?
2005-03-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] ducks under the nearest table*
2005-03-22 [ikkle sid]: fne fnx wats this dude on about *points to [Angelic nightmares]
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: *shrugs shoulders* dunno...*looks under that table* what's wrong?
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the floor gremlins attack wiccan wolf for invading their territory*
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: *slays the floor gremlins*
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pride of lions come in and drag you away*
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *closely escorted by the gang of chickens*
2005-03-22 [nokaredes]: weirdo.
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes? you called again?
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: *breaks free* stipid chickens
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh heh...
2005-03-22 [nokaredes]: my pants are sticky.
2005-03-22 [nokaredes]: (my friend spilled soda on me)
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mugs you*
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's a good thing you added that last part there...
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: lol
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sniff sniff* I smell a sara! *attacks you*
2005-03-22 [sara(:]: *screams* *tries to beat him off*
2005-03-22 [ikkle sid]: *helps ya get him off n throws him against the wall*
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *shoots you*
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-03-22 [ikkle sid]: *comes bak from the dead n okaaaaaaaaaaaaaay then!
2005-03-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: A farmer had 3 beautiful daughters who were getting ready to go out on dates. The first beau came to the door and said, ''I'm Eddie, I'm here to pick up Betty. We're going for spaghetti, is she ready?'' No. The second beau came to the door and said, ''I'm Joe, I'm here to pick up Flo to take her to the show. Is she ready to go?'' No. The third beau came to the door and said to the farmer. ''Hello, my name is Chuck.'' The farmer shot Chuck.
2005-03-23 [dani california 311]: howdy
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: LMAO
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: howdy doody...
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Mr.Black is monotheistic,rich,$ handsome.On the other hand,Mr.White rubs and kisses a Budha's tummy every morning for good luck,extremely poor,but not neccessarily ugly.both of them meet in an alleyway.They walk past each other,without a second thought that either one of them exists.Passing Mr.Black,Mr. White gives a little fart on accident."What the crap?!" says Mr.Black.Tune in tommorrow for chapter four(4)!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: NOT AGAIN!!! *sobs*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *pats Turkey on the back*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: You mugged ME?! oooh...*stomps off (...to get her RL hitman on the cell...)*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... sucker...
2005-03-23 [ikkle sid]: QUIT WIV THE MR.BLACK N MR.WHITE !PLZ!
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Are you dissing Mr.Black and Mr. White?!fine....I'll make TWO chapters a day now...*eats ramen*...
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in and groans- ah...this i'm sobering up....damn... -walks over to the bar and sits down-
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: sits down...[I'm immitating your old style].....*eats ramen*..
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -groans again- ya okay what ever -rubs her head-
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: [S'UP?!HOYA DOIN'?!NEED SOME ASSPIRIN?!]
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -nods- muchly...
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *vomits on nc*
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: dunno...I was bored. I hate March.
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: so......you're dissing the Irish?
2005-03-23 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay who is dissing the Irish?....I am Irish
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: tapestry is dissing the Irish!
2005-03-23 [Beo-Wulf]: [Tapestry of Destiny] Why are you dissing the Irish?
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I said I hate the month, not the holidays in the month...>.>
2005-03-23 [Beo-Wulf]: Alright....Why do you hate the month?
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Because the weather here is crap in March. Yesterday it was only a few degrees short of shorts weather, and today it's so cold that it's sleeting. >.< Friday, we're to be in the 70's again...we're all over the goddamn weather-map. And that happens in March, no other time, every year.
2005-03-23 [Beo-Wulf]: oh....Thats a good resson....I hate the cold too
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Mr.Black has never been in jail.Mr.White,though,has been there....forever.As they pass,Mr. White gives a fart."What the crap?!"says Mr. Black."I'm sorry!!Please don't sue me or send me to jail!"says Mr.White.Suddenly,the ground begins to rumble.Then, a man bursts out of the ground."Hello!MY name is Stu Pidasol!"Tune in tonight for chapter five(5)!
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I don't hate any particular temperature...I hate that I have to wear my coat to work in the morning, shorts by lunch, and I'll be wearing the coat again by school-time.....and sleet, because it makes it icy and unsafe.
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: nc, weren't you gonna do two chapters a day?
2005-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: yep.....tonight....
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -shakes her head and sits up- well i'm alive now...damn it.... -looks at the Mr.Black Mr.White story and giggles- wow that's silly -hic-
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: bah.
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -looks at tapestry- hey you sound about as bad as i was last night -giggles- now that was fun!!
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: well...that depends on what you mean by "bad"...
2005-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs and her head slams on the bar as she starts to snore-
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Stu Pidasol?!
2005-03-23 [Tapestry of Destiny]: tee hee
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hush, Lara Jass...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: there's a decoder on this computer...but no image editor. darn it, back out into the rain...!
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: Lara Jass...:'D
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: what the hack?! oh well... as the budha says, "phuh kyoo"...
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: 'DivX Decoder Configuration Utility'...whatever, I don't know what it is supposed to be used for because I don't need it...and I mean 'back out into the rain' because I'm going from building to building trying to find a place that's open where I can use the image editor, but all these places have is Paint. XP
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: I notice the new mood...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: It's raining you nincompoop.
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: cooooooooool...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: hmph. at least this computer has Fireworks, and I know where the other lab is!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: you're scaring me...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: how...?
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... look! a chicken! *points and runs*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: don't make me hurt you.
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you with a 12 ft. stick*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *vaporizes the stick*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: sticky! NOT STICKY!!! *sobs*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you with a twig*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *vaporizes your hands*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: handsies! NOT HANDSIES!!! *sobs*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you with his toe*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *smashes Turkey over the head with an empty bottle, knocking him unconscious*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mumbles in his sleep*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *hog-ties Turkey with duct tape*
2005-03-23 [sara(:]: *points and luaghs*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust in and mug moonfire*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: just wait until someone takes it off...
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: que?!
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: it's duct tape......
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: or in French... CE QUI?!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha! my feathers are molting anyways... *sheds the duct tape*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *cogne la Turkey inconsciente encore*
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: *and re-ties him*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Français stupide... ¡vaya español!
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: you're stupid...don't make me take my learning-something-new frustrations out on you...
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh heh... surgeon...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: surgeon is french for sucker...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: nuh uh!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: 至少我能寫中文!
2005-03-23 [sara(:]: CHILDREN PLEASE!!!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: 您吃孩子?
2005-03-23 [sara(:]: don't u give me that mister!
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... *gives you a dirty diaper*
2005-03-23 [sara(:]: *growls; turns into her wolf form and tackles him; bites him* *changes back* hmmm...tastes like chicken...
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: baaaaaad chicken...
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: yes...bad chicken! into the cage for you! *pounces on Turkey (as a cat *narrows eyes*)*
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: [
?!
]
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: ^_^
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: 0(¨)0 MONKEY!!!
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: okay...enough emoticons.
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah...
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... should I make this wiki...?
2005-03-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Koala Lovers
2005-03-23 [nokaredes]: why'd you put that pic up twice?
2005-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry children!Due to incompetence and obvious laziness of the writer,(that's me!)the fifth chapter of "Black White" will not be aired 'till tommorrow! Thank you!And I'd like to thank Diana Cancer for her support!
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: Comment! COMMENT! *stamps feet*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comments*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: Yay!
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you in the eye*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: I'm wearing glasses...or don't you read my diaries? // You know what's a horrible movie? The one on ABC Family right now--'A Little Princess' Horrible, horrible...
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... A Little Princess...
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: Have you seen it? *is worried*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... no...?
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: ...suuuure...it's a horrible movie. the middle anyway. do you babysit?
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: only my little sister occasionally...
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: you know what's crazy? (besides you and nc) when people have you babysit their kids, and they don't leave! they stay home...usually those are the bratty kids. the ones who think it's okay to throw stuff at you...like clocks (no pun intended).
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-03-24 [ikkle sid]: okaaaaaaaaaay then i <3 koalas u rock turkey!
2005-03-24 [ikkle sid]: w8 theres nuffin there !EVIL!
2005-03-24 [sara(:]: and he tortures his little sister.....
2005-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots you*
2005-03-24 [sara(:]: *blocks it w/ a barrier* dammit how many times must we go through this...i don't feel like kicking ur ass right now...maybe later!
2005-03-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: The end of A Little Princess is funny /// ugh...I hate brats. but the best thing to keep a kid busy isn't TV, it's food. Especially eggs, because you can do them with lots of flourish and after that, they still have to eat them! XD /// Turkey tortures his little sister?
2005-03-24 [sara(:]: yup he sure does....if u count rape torture...
2005-03-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *gasp*
2005-03-24 [sara(:]: shocking i no
2005-03-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ....incest....!
2005-03-24 [ikkle sid]: okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay then *shoots turkey n getz aload of feathers in my mouth ... *
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ?! *mugs you*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: well, it is Alabama...>.>
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *moves to New York*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: ...erm...I don't know New York, except that Nicole is there. and the Mob. *scratches imaginary chin hair*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: the Mob?! noooo! *gets mugged*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *moves to the north pole*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: ...the Mob wouldn't mug you...
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh well... I'm safe here... *gets mugged by santa's elves* AAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHH!!!
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *moves to the south pole*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: eeeeeeeekkkkkkkkk!!! POLAR BEARS!!!
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *swims into the ocean*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooooooooo! sharks!!! *moves to germany*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: *where he is mugged by penguins*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* NAZIS!!! *moves to england*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! BRITISH PEOPLE!!! *commits suicide*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: the world is a cruel place...
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh well... there's always Ireland! *moves to ireland*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets raped by leprecans and drunken irish people* ick... *moves to [Mortified Penguin]'s house*
2005-03-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrieks* mutant dust bunnies and little mexicans!!! *hides in hyperharmonie's house*
2005-03-24 [nokaredes]: my house...? well, at least you won't get mugged. I have a 'reputation' among the...criminal-types ")
2005-03-24 [Tapestry of Destiny]: your house!
2005-03-24 [This Profile No Longer Exists!]: wtf...sumone asked me to join this...but a frankly it looks like a damn menu for a resturant...message me back tellin me wat this wiki is about plz.
2005-03-24 [This Profile No Longer Exists!]: aight can i join?
2005-03-24 [The username is used]: you got served! at bob's diner that is!
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... the chinese clone only attracted attention and not members... *thinks of another plot*
2005-03-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *dances*...there's an advertising forum...
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... already advertised it there... what do you think I am?! an amatuer?!
2005-03-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ...maybe...
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: I advertise elftown on yahoo... when some there joins, I send them a message to join Bob's Diner...
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: The ground begins to shake,then,suddenly,a man pops out of the ground."Howdy!My name is Stu Pidasol!"exclaimed the man.Mr. Black and Mr. White both look at him.Both of them had a confused look on their face."What?" asked Mr. Black.''Uh....poo!" with tose words he took out a gun and fired at the two other men.Black dodged,without a thought,while White got shot in the arm.Tune in tommorrow for chapter six(6)!
2005-03-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: gee...I'd hurt you if you did that to me...I usually hate advertisements!
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks his head* what is posessing you to continue "mr. black/ mr. white"...?!
2005-03-25 [Tapestry of Destiny]: ...people must be interested or something.
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Eat poo!he he....
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks his head*
2005-03-25 [weasel2]: grabs tbt head and smacks his haed also
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiight...
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: go eat your own poo, dork boy! *shoots weasel* no touching the royal head! It's too sexy... why am I writing in green anyways...?
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiight....
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: 129 characters...
2005-03-25 [weasel2]: blood runs down and makes more weasels
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight... stop saying "riiiiiiiight..."!
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiight.....
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiighter...
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiightest!ha!
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiighterest... ha!
2005-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: wroooooooong....oh so wrooooong.....
2005-03-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: wroooooooooonger...
2005-03-25 [nokaredes]: is anyone on right now?
2005-03-26 [nokaredes]: why was I the only one on all day???? I think, I think I'm going insane *rocks back and forth* classes...so many classes! giant book...327 pages! and, and there aren't enough interesting Sociology courses, and...IT MATTERS!!! *huddles in the corner* .............. *whimpers*
2005-03-26 [Tapestry of Destiny]: you weren't the only one...some people just didn't comment ") ...Did you take your Accuplacer yet?
2005-03-26 [nokaredes]: well why not?! ...oh shut up.
2005-03-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comments*
2005-03-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: ò_ô
2005-03-27 [The username is used]: heeeeellllllllllllllllooooooooooo...?
2005-03-27 [weasel2]: right right right right
2005-03-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: left left left left
2005-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: badgers.......angry badgers.....
2005-03-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: what?! did the badgers get in your refrigarator again...?
2005-03-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... gotta go, ho...
2005-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: the badgers.........they know......
2005-03-27 [Hello Sunshine]: But...do they know...it?
2005-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: unfortunetly,yes......they know.......
2005-03-28 [Hello Sunshine]: No! Shall we bring out the pitchforks and torches?
2005-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: yes........pitchforks..........i can smell badger blood.........but what are we gonna do about their 8-shot revolvers.....?
2005-03-28 [Acidic Khemica]: ?
2005-03-28 [Hello Sunshine]: We shall bring along bullet proof vests and spam!
2005-03-28 [Acidic Khemica]: oh go fuck yourself
2005-03-28 [Ikko]: Caty!!No swearing my moms here!!
2005-03-28 [Acidic Khemica]: 00!!!!where!?!?!
2005-03-28 [Ikko]: okay now you can swear mom left.
2005-03-28 [Acidic Khemica]: i didnt know she was there or i wouldnt have done that....when did you get here!?!
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah... the badgers... they are a sly formatable aponant... I hunted them in my earlier years in southern mongolia... they ganged up on me... I don't remember much after that... the time has come for revenge!!! I am also very high right now...
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: wheee!!! *pulls out a giant fork* get em'!!!
2005-03-28 [Acidic Khemica]: ?
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't mind me... I'm high...
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ON MARKERS!!! WHA HA HA HA HAAA!!!
2005-03-28 [Tapestry of Destiny]: my friend gets high off lighter fluid...come to think of it, you do act like him. O.o
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: I might just be him...
2005-03-28 [Tapestry of Destiny]: oh, great. make me paranoid, will ya?
2005-03-28 [Hello Sunshine]: Teehee
2005-03-28 [Tapestry of Destiny]: <.< >.>
2005-03-28 [nokaredes]: it's pathetic that I know too many people who get high off lighter fluid to know who you're talking about. you probably only know...Ian or Ben. he does act like Ben...*stares suspiciously at Turkey* anyway...I got The Darkness CD! XD I haven't stopped listening to it since Friday, and that's saying a lot because I have to take off my glasses to listen on headphones. drove my cat insane. he adores high noises, and thought I was making them! lol
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: poor cat... it looks as though we'll have to put em' down... *starts up chainsaw*
2005-03-28 [Tapestry of Destiny]: what cat?
2005-03-28 [nokaredes]: my cat! nuh uh, no way. *starts up flame-thrower* c'mon, I dare ya!
2005-03-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes hands with cat* we're teaming up to kill the threat of the badger army...
2005-03-28 [Hello Sunshine]: -Nods- I'm providing the pitchforks and torches!
2005-03-29 [nokaredes]: Yoda vs. badgers? ...interesting...
2005-03-29 [ikkle sid]: go badgers!!! no i mean ... errr go U!!! *looks innocent n passes turkey a dagger 2 make peace ! :p x
2005-03-29 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Yoda? Your cat's name is Yoda?
2005-03-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: my cousin's cat's name is yoda... even Yoda's name is Yoda! too many yodas...
2005-03-29 [sara(:]: Riiiiiight....
2005-03-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: even her name is yoda! *points*
2005-03-30 [nokaredes]: *offended noise* Tap, you knew that. Turkey, it's rude to point.
2005-03-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *point point*
2005-03-30 [nokaredes]: *turns up the music*
2005-03-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *turns up his polka CD*
2005-03-30 [nokaredes]: polka? >.>
2005-03-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: gooooooooo POLKA!
2005-03-30 [nokaredes]: go The Darkness! except, Turkey, you're too little to listen to them...tee hee ")
2005-03-30 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow talky to muchy....
2005-03-30 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I...knew...that? Uh...suuure...
2005-03-30 [Hello Sunshine]: Go Dir en Grey!!! >.<
2005-03-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-03-30 [Tapestry of Destiny]: EVER.
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: cooks tbt
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: hey bro when did you get here?
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: ive been here for a bout a hour
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: wow
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yes and ived been in this wiki for a week heheheh
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: heh well shows how slow i am
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: you slow ok
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: heh yeah i know hard to believe
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: no its not
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: im kidding i know im slow at some things
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yes and so im i sis so hows school going
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: um well okay i guess kinda pissed at it and all
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yes and im that way at work
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: heh yeah i bet i would be to i am not working yet getting a job this summer o.0
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yes and i put up with peopel that ack like 5 year olds
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: eh that is so frikkin gay
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yes i know and thay think im bad
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: hah yeah whatever that is wrong
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yes i know but thats life
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: yeah it is
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: yup
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: ehh i would hate that
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: thats why im changing jobs
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: good i would to
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: and ill like it better also
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: yeah hehe ^^'
2005-03-31 [weasel2]: *smiles*
2005-03-31 [Acidic Khemica]: ^_^
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sniff sniff* I SMELL SANITY!!! *attacks random people*
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I also smell the color nine... o_O
2005-03-31 [Hello Sunshine]: I smell blue...
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: blue tastes like chicken... but green tastes like bacon...
2005-03-31 [Hello Sunshine]: So true.
2005-03-31 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and purple?
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: purple feels gay...
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Mr.Black and Mr.White will be taking a week-long break.Thank you.
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cheers*
2005-03-31 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and purple?
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: The week-long break is over!Thank you for waiting ever so patiently for 4 minutes!
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: NNNOOOOOOOOOOO!!! *sobs*
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha! I'm not going to lunch on friday!
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Why aren't you going to lunch?Is it your wonderful and semi-rich grandmother's fault?
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... [Bleeding of my scarz]...
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: hah hah! she sued a truck company and got semi-rich... if that's not where she's getting her money, she's dealing drugs again...
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa!She sued a truck company?.....and she didn't get those marijuana seeds from me......I swear....
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! yup... when a truck hit my aunt's car... (who is now in a comma)
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ya know...? my long lost aunt Pam...?
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: You mean your rant Pam and your funcle Pijjle...?
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... wait... my funcle Pijjle?!
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: have you written anymore of the story...?
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo,seriously,is your aunt in a coma?
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah...
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: and have you written anymore of Barry Cotter???
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: When did this happen?....And Dixon wants to talk to Lara.....[Hey,baby......]
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: when I was born... or around then... [hey you ugly cow, you...]
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Is she still in a coma...?[hey,sea elephant,wanna boogy?]
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah... [only if your fat body doesn't break the floor!]
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiight.....Barty Crouch![efggn nghj ojgyert nhgcrd?]
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: [xmytxr,75rxytxhg!!!]
2005-03-31 [Tapestry of Destiny]: fall asleep on the computer, Turkey?
2005-03-31 [ikkle sid]: has no idea wat u's r goin on about *walks off*
2005-03-31 [jessica.]: hi
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: sup?!
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ....Terri Schiavo was officialy announced DEAD on the morning of Thursday 31,2005......the world will miss her...
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: yup....
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: poor thing......she died so young....she was ONLY 41.....
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: whoa...
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: so young... so much life yet to live...
2005-03-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...coulda lived another 3, 4 years tops!
2005-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.......
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight... I still gotta work on ol' Barry...
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: we're almost done with chapter 1...
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.......riiiiiiiight......
2005-04-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why do i always get so behind in here?
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh.......riiiiiiiight......
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.......do you read past messages?
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: obviously not...
2005-04-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: nu uh, i tink its cause yoo peeps talky to muchy
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... not possible...
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: in some wikis,they have up to 10 comment pages....now,THAT'S scary.....
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: GIR!
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: yay,gir!.....he's got mental problems.....
2005-04-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ALL BOW TO MIGHTY GIR!
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.....no....
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats gir* mmm... needs some Barbeque sauce...
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....riiiiiiight.....
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...thgiiiiiiir ...huh hu
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: los maranos se comieron todo!POR QUE?!
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: dereeeeeeeeecha...
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiight.....you just said the direction "right"......stupid thimble brain!
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *crys*
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ha ha!Sucker!
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: raaaaaaaaaaaazón...?
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: reason?!.....poor turkey.....can't even say a Spanish word without sounding stupid!
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I know! *shoots you* that solves that little problem...
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: no it doesn't....it just makes it worse.....*kills you*....
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: 11 votes for mwa... 4 votes for your ugly hide!!! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HARK!!! *cough*
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha... Rasputin survived poisen... being shot... then the people got mad and threw him in the river in a sack... good ol' Rasputin...
2005-04-01 [Hello Sunshine]: -Nods- Then he was in limbo...Poor Rasputin.
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.alexanderpalace.org/palace/Rasputin.html
2005-04-01 [Hello Sunshine]: o.o
2005-04-01 [nokaredes]: this guy in some classes of mine has taken to saying 'gasoleena' really slowly while doing that creepy I'm-so-hot pointing thing...and I saw someone on the bus today. someone...strange. I think she had a body! I mean, two bodies...you know what I mean!
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh....."gasolina" is a popular song in Spanish....
2005-04-01 [nokaredes]: so? that doesn't mean that he should reduce his vocabulary to just that one word...
2005-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh......okey dokey.....
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: stupid mexicans!
2005-04-01 [nokaredes]: don't tell me you're a racist, Turkey...
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... my only friends are spanish... yes!!!
2005-04-01 [ikkle sid]: racist twats ... fukin h8 em!!!!
2005-04-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-04-01 [nokaredes]: I don't like racism or steriotypes, but in my experience, one is correct -- Asian people can't drive. Well, they can't turn their cars around in a driveway the size of a parking lot...
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Does anyone have a cup of sugar i can borrow?
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: never!!! *throws salt at you*
2005-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Don't throw salt at me.*screams and turns into a wolf and bites [The Bad Turkey]*
2005-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Don't throw salt at me.*screams and turns into a wolf and bites [The Bad Turkey]*
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: WHAT?! *shoots you*
2005-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *heals myself and bites the crap out of [The Bad Turkey]*
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: "bites the crap out of me" do you mean that literally?!
2005-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: no.*grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-04-02 [nokaredes]: I order everyone watching this wiki to go look up Spontaneous Kundalini Awakening on a search engine. Now!
2005-04-02 [nokaredes]: and I give you this dancing guy in return: 
2005-04-02 [Acidic Khemica]: o.0
2005-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiight.....throw in a toothpick and you got yourself a deal!
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: hey! I've seen that guy before! HE'S THE ONE THAT MUGGED ME!!!
2005-04-02 [nokaredes]: *throws a toothpick at nc* okay, which one of you is Barry Cotter?
2005-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: turkey is.....we're making a parody of Harry Potter......Everybody....please,a moment of silence,in honor of Pope John Paul II,who died at 9:37 P.M. Roman time,April 2,2005....
2005-04-02 [The username is used]: moments over... party!!! *boogies*
2005-04-02 [The username is used]: ♥
2005-04-02 [The username is used]: ha ha! yesterday I had almost 300 viruses!
2005-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!
2005-04-02 [The username is used]: you heard me... I think I'll go find trey's email address now... I'll teach that that prep... *mumbles* a trojan virus should work...
2005-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.....what's a trojan virus?
2005-04-02 [The Bad Turkey]: yo mama... [♥]
2005-04-03 [nokaredes]: ugh! trojan viruses, if succesful, delete absolutely everything off of your computer. anyway...here's some things that should be on the menu:  and 
2005-04-03 [The Bad Turkey]: headlines?!
2005-04-03 [Tapestry of Destiny]: "Newborn Diaper Surprise"?!
2005-04-03 [nokaredes]: Yep. Funny ones. // Yep. >.> and the $39 hot dog.
2005-04-04 [The username is used]: I saw that one on TV the other night...
2005-04-04 [nokaredes]: and what were you doing up that late?
2005-04-04 [The Bad Turkey]: uh... look! a chicken! *points and runs*
2005-04-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in growling- well good the ass hole can speak in english -flops down at the bar and coughs for a few seconds-
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: Barry Cotter and the Sorcerer's Bone...
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: *stumbles in* fooooooood!
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: read the story!
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: I did...Chapter 3 is a blank page. I want FOOD instead!
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: I'm not even done with chapter 2 yet! *throws a chicken leg at you*
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: *Cooks, then eats the chicken leg*
2005-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......riiiiiiight....
2005-04-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: random spaming: TAKE MY POLL! 
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: *eats the poll*
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-04-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: my precious poll.....
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: Well, if Turkey would just come on and feed me...then I would regurgitate your poll. ^_^
2005-04-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: eww....
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: ...not like that...
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: *pokes you with a stick* I'm done with chapter 2 for now... I'll finish it tommorow...  chapter 2...
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: read it... *mumbles*
2005-04-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: if i could find the time i will. is it just a rough draft like version?
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: read it...*mumbles*
2005-04-05 [sara(:]: Who is this Barry Cotter? He seems familiar....
2005-04-05 [nokaredes]: Turkey.
2005-04-05 [The Bad Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-06 [sara(:]: Ah....I should have figured that....
2005-04-06 [nokaredes]: Yes you should.
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: No one's really done much here today.
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: *boogies*
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: *advertises on anthro lovers* I bet someone is going to attack me... just watch...
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: *attacks...Barry*
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: WHAT?!™
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: "*attacks...Barry*"
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: *the chickens bust in and drag you out by your toes*™
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: hey...Barry...suggest a relation with me already! *punches a chicken*
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: and no more ™!
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: *cringes in fear* ye ye yes si sir!
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: ™™™™™™™™!!!
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: sir?!™
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: that wasn't meant as a threat, btw...I just wanted to save a comment line thingy. *nods*™
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...™
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: sir?!™
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: CatHug's B's D is deleted and I think I have to go. :(
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]:
WHAT?!
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: What what?
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: uh... do the What dance™...? *boogies*
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: While I've got your attention...please visit hyperharmonie's diner!!!
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: ...just proving nc's existance at anthro lovers
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: you can make a clone with just the words "Bob's Diner" by adding alt+0173 anywhere in there...
2005-04-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: uh-huh....
2005-04-07 [nokaredes]: Well...I don't wanna!
2005-04-07 [ikkle sid]: CHILL! PEEPS!
2005-04-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i was house surfing on et a couple days ago and a a guy who was advertising the diner as 'Boob's Diner'
2005-04-07 [The Bad Turkey]: WHAT?! OK!!! TELL ME WHO IT WAS!!!
2005-04-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dont remember the name just that hes advertising 'Boob's Diner'
2005-04-08 [nokaredes]: I need to do that...
2005-04-08 [ikkle sid]: LOL! :p ...
2005-04-08 [Tapestry of Destiny]: hi
2005-04-08 [The Bad Turkey]: hola seniorita...
2005-04-08 [The Bad Turkey]: 2 more...
2005-04-08 [The Bad Turkey]: ...comments! yay! 6000!
2005-04-08 [Tapestry of Destiny]: 6001 now ;)
2005-04-08 [nokaredes]: hello...no one's really talked much here today.
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im here... *pout*
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: but you haven't talked.
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i am now
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: uh huh...
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: mhmm... sure am
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: well, as interesting as this conversation is...where are the rest of our members?
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dunno most of them never seem to talk here ne ways
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: they used to...like Pixiestickchick. *nods*
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i havent seen her in so long.....
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: If only our friendly neighborhood Turkey were here...
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *kicks turkey in the head for not noticeing his very blunt cue to show up*
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: Yes...we should beat him up. He's at a sleepover at nc's house...they're gonna braid each other's hair and...what do guys do on sleepovers? *scratches head*
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: umm... *evil, bad and utterly perverted images come to mind* *starts repeatedly ramming haed against wall to get images out*
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: oh, thanks for passing that virus over here...*also starts ramming head against wall to get images out*
2005-04-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pimp slaps all the ho's*
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well that disclueds me bc i dont take money
2005-04-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight....that's not what you said last night!
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well you offered so it was only the polite thing to take it
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: Hey, I just found out an...interesting...fact that kinda sounds Bob's Diner-y...anyone want to hear it? (that shows you how disgusting it is, that I feel the need to ask...)
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: sure why not? i need something t make me throw up my dinner
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: :D okay then...last chance...if you get queasy easily, you need to look away now!   ....................   .....   ...   People sometimes use women's armpit hair for dolls' eyelashes. ^_^
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: sounds like something from france
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: Why? Because I mentioned armpit hair?
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes actually. i just watched a movis with a french woman cliche about armpit hair
2005-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: okey dokey......riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight....
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: omg! the it is back!
2005-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: you're gonna die....
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: back from where? dirty boy sleepover things?
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ooOOoo it said a word!
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: three, actually...
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh it did, didnt it? im still waiting to die though
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: he keeps stealing my moods. O.o he hasn't noticed my newest one yet though...
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol
2005-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.....riiiiiiiiight....
2005-04-09 [nokaredes]: except now he has.
2005-04-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o0
2005-04-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi everyone
2005-04-10 [The Bad Turkey]: hey! no advertising hyper! I sure hate it when people spam their pointless wikis...
2005-04-10 [The Bad Turkey]: ha ha... yeah... riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: What pointless wiki?
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: *tries to look innocent*
2005-04-10 [la vie lemon]: *and fails because she's painted up like a clown*
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-04-10 [The Bad Turkey]: *offendeder noise*
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: What do you have to be offended about? You don't get tied to the chair in the bathroom so your mom can put mascara on you...riiiiight?
2005-04-10 [The Bad Turkey]: www.yesIdo!butonlyontheweekends!.com
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: that's really....something, Turkey.
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: I mean Barry. >.<
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: yes.....I kind of figured that.....
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: Well, not everything is about you, nc.
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: would you prefer it if I just came out and said it?
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: sure,but I would't accept it as the truth....How am I attention-hungry?
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: You just...are.
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: okey doke....think what you want.....*starts destroying parts of B's D to make them ugly,but doesn't help the ugliness that it's already in*.....
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: destroying?!
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: .....he he.....yes.....it makes the place look better!
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: nuh uh! ...will Turkey be mad?
2005-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no...SINCE I'M THE OWNER,BUT HE WON"T GIVE ME THE WIKI!!!!!!
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: *Nelson laugh* ha-ha!
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: You can't have hyperharmonie's diner or Dîneur de Bob either! Muahahaha!
2005-04-10 [ThEGranDWazoO]: ...yummy
2005-04-10 [nokaredes]: Are you following me now, jack_the_ripper?
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: well, fine...I was meaning to stop coming (and commenting) soon anyway. I don't have time to be here anymore...and it's not ladylike. >:P
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: What'd he do?
2005-04-11 [The Bad Turkey]: oh, you'll see what I'll do... you will see... *cackles* see you later nc! or not...!
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: nc is a baaaaad owner...*shakes turkey sandwich in anger*
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: Hey, [Sagacious Turkey] and [spitfire_35121]...you both can't be THE Bad Turkey...either you both have to change to A Bad Turkey or one of you has to change your name. ;)
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: he's gonna change it as soon as he can get on...
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sets nc on fire* ha! I'm owner again! sucker...
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: *calmly puts nc out*
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: mhmm...
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]:     
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: hi Turkey...
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: hi harmony...
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: not harmony! hh or something... // I have caught my cat. I have his face. >.>
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yeah... riiiiiiight...
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: oh, you're no fun...*goes off to put makeup on the cat (it's for sensitive skin, you see, so it won't hurt him. except mentally, of course. ^_^)*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! how dare you do that to the poor kitty! *barbeques a kitten* you're sick! *starts eating the kitten* you should be sent to jail, you sicko! *throws the bones over his shoulder*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *burp* coulda used some barbeque sauce...
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: YAY! Fire! *sets nc back on fire*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles and throws "gasolina" on him*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: wiki nominations
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: *claps and cheers* // yes it is. what aboud id?
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *screams "THE MEXICANS ARE COMING! THE MEXICANS ARE COMING!" while riding down the street on a horse*
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: *shoots Turkey*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *falls off the horse into a mud puddle* At least I died defending my people... *croaks*
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: Am I creepy?
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... riiiiiiight...
2005-04-11 [sara(:]: *walks in*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: you're not creepy, here! compared to the people around here, you're a god! and by "people around here", I mean [sara(:]...
2005-04-11 [nokaredes]: Was that a yes or a no? // hi moon_fire!
2005-04-11 [sara(:]: Hello. *glares at Dustin* You are so gonna get it tomorrow...
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-11 [sara(:]: *growls*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... I'm so sexy, you have to growl at me...
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you guys see the pics i put up earlier?
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes, and I believe I replied "20:09:31 The Bad Turkey: riiiiiiiight... "
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well i didnt see that and i havent looked at the past comments yets
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... you know the consequences... *starts chainsaw*
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *blinks*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! DON'T YOU BLINK AT ME, YOUNG LADY!!! TO YOUR ROOM, NOW!!!
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im older than you and im already in my room *blink blink*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust in and drag you into the streets*
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *claps hand happily* oh yay! the chickens! *eats one of the chickens*
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *they buy a steam roller and run you down*
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ah just what my back needed a good straightening
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh yeah?! *feeds you cream filled doughnuts by the dozen* ha ha! you're obese!
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: YAY! FATNESS!
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots the dog* get off my lawn!
2005-04-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... *pokes the dog* maybe I should have told it to get off my lawn before I shot it...
2005-04-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 
2005-04-11 [weasel2]: puppy puppy puppy
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: *brings the doggie back to life, and watches it pee on Turkey's lawn before running away*
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes his fist and chases the dog*
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: Oh, sorry about that...lemme get 'im. Hey Cujo! Here doggy! *pats own knees*
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks up to the dog* aaaaawwwwwww... how cute! *pets*
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: *doggy bites off Turkey's hands*
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha! turkeys don't have hands! *burns the dog*
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats his egg from anthro lovers* ...rrrrrr...
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: O.o if you don't have hands. how are you typing?
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...beak!
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: You're typing with your beak?
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: Weirdo.
2005-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......riiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight... uh huh...
2005-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: okey tay....*listens to ludicrous's newest song*
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kills ludicrous* get to work, ye slave!
2005-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!!
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *burns you at the steak* mmm... steak...
2005-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Squirel steak!
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *cooks squirrel lad*
2005-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: too late!already cooked in the story!....how ironic...
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO SQUIRREL LAD?!
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: the courts of elftown
2005-04-12 [nokaredes]: 'Steak'? // 'Squirrel Lad'? // Quit linking! This isn't Spamnation!!
2005-04-12 [sara(:]: -_-" How interesting...
2005-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: s'up,ho?
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *link link*
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: Oro?
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots you* no "oroing"!
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why?
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... *shoots you* no questioning my authority!
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *watches as buttet hits wall opposite her* um im over here...
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: huh? wha? oh... *rapidly fires an automatic bazooka at you*
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *watches as it hits every where but her* your a very bad shot you know that?
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust through the window and drag you to a dark alleyway*
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *rolls eyes* you always have to get the chickens to do your dirty work for you dont ya? guess you just dont have enough balls to do it yourself
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: you don't want me to prove that...
2005-04-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hey i got a saying you could post at the top of the Bob's Diner page. i swear it fits perfectly
2005-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: it can't be better than the current one... "The best part of waking up, is urine in your cup..."
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: its 'If you are what you eat, then we're easy, fast and cheap!'
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: one problem there... that's a lie... if I put that, I would be lying to our wonderful customers! in other words... IT'S PERFECT!!!
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: should i add it some where near the top?
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... sure...?
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Oro?*imitates Rorouni Kenshin*
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *imitates Rorouni Kenshin... BY CUTTING OFF YOUR HEAD!!!*
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: HA HA HAA!!!
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts on his robe and wizard hat*
2005-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate [Sagacious Turkey]
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pimp slaps you* what was that, ho?!
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kicks you and starts beating you* WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU?!
2005-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I HATE [Sagacious Turkey]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whacks misty with a metal bat* why?! I don't deserve to be hated! I've never even touched you!!! *punches you*
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: away with nc's head! ...and comment...
2005-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr hiss hiss*
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Poo.....
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: dear misty... have a cracker... on the house! now... care to explain...?
2005-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *bites [Mortified Penguin]*that is for making fun of Harry Potter and the sorcerer's stone.
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Why'd you bite me,psycho?!
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah... Barry Cotter and the Sorcerer's Bone...? It's not making fun! just making funny!
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiight....
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiighter...
2005-04-13 [DarkAngel3]: I wanna join
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Just add your name to the link turkey will give you!
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHA- WHAT?! ok!!! you got served! at bob's diner that is!
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Exactly!*decapitates you*
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... I have a joke...
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: pussy
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha! get it?
2005-04-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey! get back here so I can finish my joke!!!
2005-04-13 [PixieStickChick]: TURKEY!! Finally something normal to eat!! *snatches turkey's leg and runs off to eat*
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: Oro? // Why? // Turkey has no baaaa-aaals... // nc, if you just put on your robe, were you naked before? IN PUBLIC?? ...Naughty boy... // I HATE TURKEY TOOOOOOO!! // Rightest... // Is that white-out or whipped cream?
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: Gah, see the lengths I have to go to when you guys TALK TOO MUCH????!
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: You should center the new motto, so it'll look better... // I know someone in the mob!! The REAL mob! *jumps with joy* She has 'connections'!
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: me? all i did was say oro really...
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: And the 'easy, fast and cheap!' thingy...
2005-04-13 [PixieStickChick]: *blinks* wow bad food does turn people crazy
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ya think?
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: :D
2005-04-13 [PixieStickChick]: yea.... *looks at hyper* definately
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: *gasp* Barry Cotter's on and yet there are no Bob's Diner comments?!?! Shame! // There's a guy across from me who's...being really creepy. If he comes over here, I may just end up having to hit him. >.>
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: ...and that guy over there *points* was just on my bus...is he following me?
2005-04-13 [nokaredes]: 
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: (shameless spamming) http://www.freecartoonanime.com/  It has free Anime and Cartoon DVDS!! all you have to do is fill out a survey and every things free!
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: for real?swear?!
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yup yup! ^.^ I just got the Inuyasha season 1 box set off of it!
2005-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: how do you get points?
2005-04-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: by doing a really simple yes no survey
2005-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: okey doke....
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: wroooooooooong.....LUCKY CHARMS?!
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love Jesse McCartney!!!!
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: MAROON 5!!!
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Jesse McCartney is h-o-t hot
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: mhmm...
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey Pheonix Ashes,do you think Jesse McCartney is hot too?
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: he looks like arron carter. hes not very stand out ish. he only has one good song. hes slightly chubby. in other words no. but then hes not really my type. if i look at him in the general overpopulized way then yeah sorta but hes still not my type
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: He is my type he like those cute snow dogs I think they are called Huskeys.
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: uh-huh... my type more runs in the way of tatoos, piercings in odd places, blue purple and green hair, but all around good ppl ^.^
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Then you would love my cousin Donald he dies his hair green and has his nose,eyebrows,tongue,and ears pierced and another place that I can't say but I bet it hurts like hell,if you know what place i am talking about say ok twice.
2005-04-14 [nokaredes]: (okay okay ^_^) I'm getting my ears pierced tomorrow...and my hair done, and my makeup AGAIN...oh well, at least I can still beat people up who make fun of me (or cheat on the Accuplacer, tee hee).
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: them he has a prince albert? bars straight through?
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: My cousin donald I don't know how but he got his manhood pireced.
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: interesting.... *pictures pop in head* speaking of geting hair and makeup done, im going to prom on saturday! *does happy dance*
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sniff sniff* WHAT'S THAT?! IT SMELLS LIKE A NORMAL CONVERSTION TO ME!!! WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU PEOPLE ABOUT THAT?!
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: cooks tbt and eats his legs
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ha ha! *makes funs of hyper*
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: the... bad... turkey... BAD!!! YOU NOW HAVE FOOD POISENING!!!
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: so im a rodent
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles* here boy! come on! *throws a piece of cheese* go fetch it, boy!
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeeeeeeeeey... wait a second... I'm a bird... you're a rodent... as long as you aren't the rare puruvian death rat, then I'm your predator!
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: gets the cheese and o0 sorry about that smell
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: peeeeeeeeeeeeeeee
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: pooooooooooooooo
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: heheheheh
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks nose* ick... better not waste it, though... *adds it on the menu*
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ew.
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: have you perchance seen the menu...? and to that, you say "Ew."? riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: well i haven't read the menu.
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: orders eggs and bloody tost
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a menu at you* have a look-see!
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: sorry... we're fresh out of tost... we have some offbrand "toast" though, If you would like to try it...
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Can i have the Flattened road kill squirrel?
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure... he's outside if you want em'...
2005-04-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool.*eats the Flattened road kill squirrel then pays for it*
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you actually paid for that? with real money? i would have use my Bob's Diner Bucks
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: either that, or monopoly money works fine too...
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: meh... all out of that... spent it all buying edible undies
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: ok fine ill gest eat my kid then
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii- *cough, sputter* -iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: WHAT?! you cant eat me daddy!
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats your daddy*... ok... that just sounded wrong...
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lmfao!
2005-04-14 [weasel2]: yes i can you are made of milk
2005-04-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: nuuu..... *wags finger* milk and honey get it right
2005-04-14 [nokaredes]: '*makes funs of hyperharmonie*'? *makes fun of Turkey*
2005-04-14 [ikkle sid]: *shoots u!*
2005-04-14 [nokaredes]: O.o
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooooooo... that's my job! *shoots hyper*
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *passes out mental mints*
2005-04-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ??????????????????????
2005-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... read the food...
2005-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I read the food.
2005-04-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wtf...?
2005-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't know he told me to read the food so i did.
2005-04-15 [nokaredes]: Rude food! Yay!
2005-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cheers*
2005-04-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: mhmm...
2005-04-15 [nokaredes]: I was gonna change my UN, but the one I wanted is already taken. :(
2005-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: sucker...
2005-04-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what was it?
2005-04-15 [nokaredes]: jerk!
2005-04-15 [nokaredes]: [Stargirl]
2005-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh....riiiiiiiiiight....?
2005-04-15 [nokaredes]: *pokes nc*
2005-04-15 [ikkle sid]: *pokes [nokaredes]*
2005-04-15 [nokaredes]: I don't know you!
2005-04-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *skips around, happily telling all the customers that hyper looks like an Aye-aye*
2005-04-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ok....
2005-04-16 [nokaredes]: Who is this hyper person? I do not know this hyper person...
2005-04-16 [nokaredes]: You know, if you keep deleting my comments...actually, nevermind.
2005-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh........riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-04-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks nose*
2005-04-16 [nokaredes]: Where'd you get a pic of French breath mints?
2005-04-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... your mama! ha ha ha!!!
2005-04-16 [nokaredes]: Funny...if you knew French, you could go to Dîneur de Bob and see what I said about you...
2005-04-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: you didn't say anything about me... recently...
2005-04-16 [la vie lemon]: Dîneur de Bob? *goes off to check Dîneur de Bob and see what Stars wrote*
2005-04-16 [la vie lemon]: especially b/c i'm too lazy to go back in the comments...i've been off for weeks! >.<
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love [Sagacious Turkey].
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't we all... hey wait a second... "2005-04-13 Misty1: I hate [Sagacious Turkey]"?! make up your mind!
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters and eats a squirrel*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love [Sagacious Turkey] he grew on me.
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sits at a booth* hey! the service here sucks! I demand to see the manager!!!
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes? you called?
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah! this place stinks! screw you!
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh no you didn't! *pimp slaps you*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* it's on now!!! *jumps over the table and tackles [Sagacious Turkey]*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *scuffles with himself for a minute and realizes he's being stared at by everyone*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets up and dusts himself off* well... that should help the comment number a bit... *sits back down and continues his squirrel*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gasps from the same booth that [Sagacious Turkey] was just sitting at*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... this squirrel tastes funny... *puts on some more barbeque sauce*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: My squirrel tastes good.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Dude, Misty1, you're so stalking Turkey. O.O
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love [Sagacious Turkey].
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Does he love you back?
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't know.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: 
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ???what is that???
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Something that apparently annoys you. 
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: It doesn't annoy me I just want to know what it is it is cute.
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks his head*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Are you ok [Sagacious Turkey]?
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]:  // *smacks Turkey's head*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: hey don't smack [Sagacious Turkey]'s head.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]:  HE STARTED IT!! *points at Turkey and runs away*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *runs hyper over with a car*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: don't you run away from me runs after More Than Stars.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]:  I still don't know any 'hyper'. // Ack!  *runs faster*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *runs faster than the speed of light and tackles [nokaredes]*
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: If you ran faster than the speed of light, you'd have passed me in a split second. 
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey!!! *points at that emoticon* that's mine!!!
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Turns around and tackles [nokaredes]*
2005-04-17 [weasel2]: jumps on both of them yelling*dog pile*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi weasel2.*hugs weasel2*
2005-04-17 [weasel2]: hi misty hugs back
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I missed you weasel2.
2005-04-17 [weasel2]: i know but i have to let the owner of this puter on some times you know
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: hehehe
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: No it's not! // Yay! Dog pile!
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Hey, Misty...I know Turkey's phone number.
2005-04-17 [weasel2]: give it give it
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Really Give it to me now before I hurt you.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: I know his home address too.
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Please give me his phonenumber and home address.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: But...*sad eyes*...you tackled me.
2005-04-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Twice.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Yes--twice!
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am sorry.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Aww...*hugs Misty1* But I can't give you Turkey's phone number. It's not mine to give. It was mean of me to mention it, but I was mad. >.>
2005-04-17 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *the chickens drag you into the street*
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: it is ok.*hugs [nokaredes]*I was mad and that is why I tackled you I was mad at [Shadow Reaper] but I was taking it out on you.
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: NO, NOT THE CHICKENS!! That's Turkey's thing anyways...(and yes, I know he's not on right now to help them drag me) // Oh, yea, sometimes I do that too...but I have a clone account that I go on when I am mad, so I don't yell at people w/o warning. ^_^
2005-04-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh???
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: 'Huh?' to which part?
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I also have your number and address! *waves a piece of paper threateningly*
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Exactly.
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens drag you into the streets*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...but I will publicly reveal nc's number! (205) 274-4453!
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: Didn't they do that already? // Ooh, really? *writes that down*
2005-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...be warned... he's hispanic... any odd noises in the background are just his native rituals...
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: All 274 numbers down here are school numbers. >.>
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: I don't want to be mean, but can people from here stop following me to the anti-bigotry wiki?
2005-04-17 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *sings* i dont wanna be a chicken. i dont wanna be a duck. so i shake my butt! *music goes on*
2005-04-17 [nokaredes]: I took my cat for a walk today. >.>
2005-04-18 [The Bad Turkey]: *eats your cat* tastes like... well, definatley not chicken...
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: *gets the chainsaw* you'd better hope she's still alive in there, or I won't bring you back. *glares*
2005-04-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh...
2005-04-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: gotta go, ho!
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-04-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *nelson laugh* ha ha!
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: *anime fall*
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: http://www.freecomicbookday.com/
2005-04-18 [ikkle sid]: ^_^
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: Yep.
2005-04-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I went to a free comic book day thing last year... darn cheap batman comics!!!
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: 0.0
2005-04-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: by the way... whoever wins that poll... *points to the poll up there* ...gets to be the new manager! good luck, suckers... cheating is allowed...
2005-04-18 [nokaredes]: I voted for you, but I still have 5 votes. 0.0
2005-04-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *waits for nc to cheat*
2005-04-19 [nokaredes]: How would nc cheat?
2005-04-19 [ikkle sid]: turkey u now got anuva vote lol ;p
2005-04-19 [sara(:]: *Wlkas in.* It's been a while....
2005-04-19 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello peoples....How you doing?
2005-04-19 [nokaredes]: okay...I got my hair done earlier today, and now we have rain and blue skies. *is paranoid* I think I've just screwed up the natural order of things or something.
2005-04-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: poor hair... how would you like to be cut into pieces and hit around?!
2005-04-19 [nokaredes]: Oh shut up.
2005-04-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *curls his beard* long live hair!
2005-04-19 [nokaredes]: ...beard?
2005-04-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... beard... *whips you with his twelve foot beard*
2005-04-19 [nokaredes]: oooh.
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: Hey guess what I have?
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: Wait, don't guess. 0.o I'll...just tell you. Turkey's drawing! Yay!
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: See?:
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]:   
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: And in my drawing, I drew him pants...unlike Tapestry...and did you know nc changed his name? it's now [Mortified Penguin].
2005-04-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks over to the corner and sits alone*
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: *stares at [Angelic nightmares]*
2005-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: uh......star.....do you constantly stalk me?
2005-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.....let me re-phrase that.....WHY do you stalk me?
2005-04-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -runs in and tackles NC
2005-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *melts some snow n' ice*HAHA!Take that,"guardian"!
2005-04-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -gets him wet- haha that'll teach ya
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: I don't stalk you... *innocent look* // Wow. Wet...?
2005-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.....I just got out of ma' pool......smart move.....*melts some more snow and ice*....
2005-04-20 [nokaredes]: Oh...pool...*drools*
2005-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: yeah.....the one i told you about last friday....
2005-04-21 [The username is used]: yeah... the 4-foot deep inflatable one from wal-mart!!! *cackles and goes to swim in his plastic wading pool*
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: oh that pool...my brother builds real ones. so what's up with this? Two nc's????!
2005-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: turkey took my old name....
2005-04-21 [The username is used]: liar!!! I'm the real nc!!!
2005-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: yep.....
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: I have nothing to add, but I will comment anyway.
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: *comment*
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: I have the bell from my cat's collar on a chain on my neck...it annoys people. (the cat doesn't need it; it just makes her stealthier at catching birds. -.-)
2005-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: "birds" you say.....no doubt turkey is probably copying my description....
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: Yes...'birds'...chipmunks...lizards...snakes...rabbits...*continues rambling/naming anything smaller than a cat*
2005-04-21 [The username is used]: and remember... winner of the poll becomes the new manager...
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: I don't give a crap if I win...like I said, I voted for Turkey, who is nowhere to be seen right now. I just take pride in knowing that he'll never know my password. ;)
2005-04-21 [The username is used]: *shakes fist* I'm right here!
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: Where? Who said that? Not Turkey, that's for sure... // But we'll all remember that comment...so deleting it won't do much. XP
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: what comment...?
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: duh.
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: "duh"? I don't remember that comment...
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: it'll go away eventually anyway.
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: especially if I keep babbling. *shuts up*
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: What will go away eventually...? you're confusing me...
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: duh. again.
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: *the chickens drag you into the street*
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...and realise they have the wrong person and drag "than" into the streets*
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *and date-rapes her*
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: *stops watching this wiki...and means it this time!*
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... you started it!!!
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: no I didn't!
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: and take me out of the poll.
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: never! I think I might give Bob's Diner to nc...
2005-04-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: Seth, Seth, Seth to my lou...
2005-04-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: I voted for Turkey now too.
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points at "than"* have you been messaging people?! ...or is this a strange clone... *pokes tap*
2005-04-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: No, I happened to catch that Mr. Dustin Seth Goble comment...now I know both your middle and last name! Muahahahaha!
2005-04-21 [Tapestry of Destiny]: and don't poke me.
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: Take me out of the poll, or I'll report you. It's against the ET rules to have someone's UN on a wiki if they don't want it to be, and I have said 'take me off.' SO TAKE ME OFF! // ...names. How are you ever gonna get into 101 with me if you don't know that's supposed to be plural?! -.-
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: actually saying "...middle and last name..." is correct... oh, and NEVER!!!
2005-04-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... I took your "name" off...
2005-04-21 [nokaredes]: nuh uh! // good.
2005-04-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ma-ai-hii ma-ai-huu ma-ai-hoo ma-ai-haha Alo Salut sunt en un haiduc si te rog iubria mea primesto fericirea Alo Alo ti-am dat beep si sunt voinic dar sa stii nu-ti nimic vrei sa pleci dar nu ma nu ma iei nu ma nu ma nu ma iei chipul tau si dragostea din tei mi-aminese de ochii tia te sun sati spun ce simt acum
2005-04-22 [nokaredes]: hey, wait...*scrolls up* you didn't take me out of the poll...I just took your word for it. 0.o TAKE ME OUT!!
2005-04-22 [Beautiful darkness]: hello people dustin im writing now hehe
2005-04-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pats your shoulder* good for you... (don't worry... it's just meagan... she's sick in the head...)
2005-04-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: I did take your name off the poll! look at it closely...
2005-04-22 [nokaredes]: Oh, it's a wiki...don't make me hurt you. I'm travelling this summer, and I'll be driving myself home, and I can make a quick stop in AL...*glares*
2005-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Mrs. Stars.......we've been.......expecting you.....
2005-04-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... or at least Humpy McLegs has... *points to a little puppy*
2005-04-22 [n-c17]: ...rriiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-04-22 [n-c17]: yes......indeed......
2005-04-22 [n-c17]: poo.....
2005-04-22 [n-c17]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.......
2005-04-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* don't forget [Useless] and [Sir Soapy]...
2005-04-22 [nokaredes]: *glares again* Don't you people take a hint?
2005-04-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure! as long as it's an extremely obvious hint...
2005-04-22 [nokaredes]: It was. -.-
2005-04-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-04-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: la de da
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiighter...
2005-04-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wot wot
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust in a drag some random person into the streets*
2005-04-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *looks at the person being draged out with envy*
2005-04-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grabs ashes and drags her out into the streets then walks in and sits down in her seat-
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pride of lions leap in and drag pheonix into the streets*
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... *pats the lions* sorry guys, too late...
2005-04-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs at the lions- hey i already did that thank you
2005-04-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow... i was graged out... TWICE!!! YIPPEE!!!
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: I've been dragged out of B's D so many times, I'm surprised I don't have a restraining order out on me. *rolls eyes* And Turkey, it's good that you switched to another animal...no more chickens...
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens bust in and drag "than" into the streets*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: hey, at least we know that Turkey is vulnerable to baiting...
2005-04-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs and grabs one of the chickens by the neck and chews on it pulling feathers out of her mouth-
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: *Switches into a wolf form and happily joins White Wolf*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: and, you know, I think that would still count as having me in the poll.
2005-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: the chickens were turkey's idea.....the lions were mine!
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... the vasectomy-giving lions...
2005-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ......riiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: vasectomy...giving?
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: you heard me... *the lions sneak up on "than"*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: ah, but they can't give me a vasectomy. *waggles her finger*
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the lions pull out their "tube tying tools" and continue advancing*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: *gasp*
2005-04-23 [The username is used]: duh duh duh! Turkey here, to save the da-... hey... cool! vasectomy giving lions! *lays back and eats popcorn while watching the action*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: *bangs head on the nearest hard surface* quit making clone accounts!!!
2005-04-23 [The username is used]: I'm not! this is one of the same old ones... just a new name...
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: well, quit! (and go back on your TBT account.)
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: NEVER!!!
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: weirdo.
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: what?! where?! *goes off looking*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: *holds up a mirror* oy! Turkey! over here!
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* that mirror is a weirdo! *attacks the mirror*
2005-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: owchies... now I'm cut, in pain, and have seven years of bad luck!
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: You?! What about the person behind the mirror?!
2005-04-23 [sara(:]: *Walks in and sits at a table*
2005-04-23 [nokaredes]: *is already sitting at a table, all bandaged up from Turkey's mirror-attack, drumming her fingers in boredom with a bottle of alcopop (Mike's Hard Lemonade to be exact)*
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey's head*
2005-04-24 [The username is used]: *smacks Bob's head*
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: Hey, wanna see a piccy of you and me, Turkey?
2005-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: "Alcopop"?
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: It's British...it's like alcohol and soda, I think. and lemonade sometimes. ;)
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: could you all help me make a decision?
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]:   
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: either A or B...
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! let's see this so called "piccy"...
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: oh, oops. I forgot to post it. -.-
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooooooookkkkkkkkk...?
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: 
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: I knew you were gonna say that when you saw that picture...
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uno pregunta... what's your real name?!
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: You'd know if you'd ever go back to CH...unless I get there first that is!
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: Why do you want to know, anyway?
2005-04-24 [chilli_icecream]: Ok id like some well cooked sushi please
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: sorry... the oven's occupied by a vicious gang of floor gremlins... we can't cook anything...
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: wouldn't they be oven gremlins then?
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... no... the oven gremlins went extinct back in 1324 during the war of the gremlins... sheesh don't you read history books...?
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: ugh, no, I stay away from history. >.<
2005-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: interesting...
2005-04-24 [nokaredes]: so far you're the only one to vote for A or B...everyone else says D. // can you cook the floor gremlins?
2005-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: riiight.....
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: what do you vote for?
2005-04-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: aw... *pets the heroic kitty*
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: eh? *tilts her head to the side*
2005-04-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: eat ate turkey... hes my fav kitty now
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: I have no clue what you're going on about...
2005-04-25 [Dread Man]: WOO HOO!!!
2005-04-25 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: Ain't school computers great?!
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: You must have a different system than my school does--every internet connection has the same IP. *rolls eyes* and thanks to you, and the old account Bob's Diner, I can't go on anyone else's account there. Just mine, 'cause I have an antiban.
2005-04-25 [The Bad Turky]: S'up?!.....I, Dustin SETH Goble, am gay....
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: I have just come to the stunning conclusion that whoever said that isn't Turkey. *rolls eyes*
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: and the missing 'E' is proof enough for me.
2005-04-25 [dfzgfzdgvedsaf]: s'up?!
2005-04-25 [nokaredes]: not much. well, that's a lie--there's a lot going on, but nothing too interesting. you?
2005-04-26 [nokaredes]: there have been no new B's D comments since I left. Get commenting, lazy people!
2005-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry for not commenting,dear sir,but I cannot because of a bet between my parents and I.......and [Sagacious Turkey] can't comment because of his cheap ol' computer messing up.....and your school system is cheap!J/K.....I'm stunned to say that my school can aford over a hundred IPAs........
2005-04-27 [nokaredes]: 1. I should mind that you called me 'sir,' but I do not. 2. A bet? What bet? 3. I have Turkey beat--ET thought I was a web-crawler and wouldn't let me on for a day and a half:
Learn how to build crawlers!
4. I thought Turkey said you two went to the same school. Hmm...
2005-04-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... his parents bet he couldn't stay off the computer for a month... and we do go to the same school...
2005-04-28 [nokaredes]: well, then, I'd say he broke the bet. I, personally wouldn't even take that bet unless something really, really good were in it for me, 'cause otherwise I'd go insane. and, on a completely random unrelated side note, I got condoms in class today! (But no, I don't want to use them here...sorry.)
2005-04-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: sex ed?
2005-04-28 [nokaredes]: what about it?
2005-04-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight... *points at the chickens* they're lonely...
2005-04-28 [nokaredes]: tell them to join the club.
2005-04-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *they join the club* "Does this club have fringe benefits...?!"
2005-04-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes they get free air.
2005-04-29 [nokaredes]: ...it has French benefits.
2005-04-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-04-29 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey's head*
2005-04-29 [la vie lemon]: where is this "club" you speak of...?
2005-04-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: down the hall to the left... It's the room with the sign that reads: "Butt Sniffers Anonymous"
2005-04-29 [sara(:]: ::Walks in:: Damn therapists think they know everything...
2005-04-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... they probably do...
2005-04-30 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes*
2005-04-30 [nokaredes]:  *imitates George W. Bush's laugh*
2005-04-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist at the monkey president who takes orders from a guy named "Dick"*
2005-04-30 [nokaredes]: and Pac-man! Whee!
2005-05-01 [Soroptimist]: George W. Bush sounds like a cheesy supervillain.
2005-05-01 [nokaredes]: *wishes she had the delete button*
2005-05-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hands you the button*
2005-05-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-05-02 [nokaredes]: that's no fair! it doesn't work!
2005-05-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure it does... you're just not clicking hard enough...
2005-05-03 [nokaredes]: at support gay marriage, they're killing chickens...
2005-05-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-05-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Wikis that never made it
2005-05-05 [sara(:]: Join sara's pedistal There is no option!!! You must join!!
2005-05-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks nose*
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: seth knows not what he talks of......plus he's a nose-picker....*picks nose*....
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: there... you're the owner...
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I bet I am....
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... you are... see the little "delete" button...? that means you're the owner! *pimp slap*
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: naw..... I thought that meant I was the owner!
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: okey doke......time to erase the whole of B's D and recreate.......I'll be back in three minutes...
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: don't you dare erase my empire...
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: okey doke!
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: change it back... now...
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.....I kinda totally erased it....so.....yeah....
2005-05-06 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey's head* // you don't know how to fix it...? loser.
2005-05-06 [nokaredes]: *points at her mood*
2005-05-06 [nokaredes]: (since Turkey hasn't noticed...and owns The Bad Turkey)
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: interesting...
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *grabs nc* change it back... now!
2005-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Why...? Why don't you do it?
2005-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: tell me the password, and I will...
2005-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: uh......I forgot the passy word....
2005-05-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: you lie... you can just click "edit this page" and see it!!!
2005-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.......no I can't!
2005-05-07 [nokaredes]: uh huh!
2005-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *offended noise*......so how was HGTTG...?
2005-05-07 [Ikko]: Jackass you better tell them the password or I will tell the guards on you!
2005-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...?...and who may you be....sir/m'am?
2005-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: And, besides.......he gave me the wiki. You can ask 'im yourself, "jackass".
2005-05-07 [PixieStickChick]: *falls over in shock* What happened to the Diner???!!!?!?!?!
2005-05-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't worry... he's going to "rebuild" it to suit himself... (in other words he's gonna make it worse)
2005-05-10 [Mortified Penguin]: yeah, riiiiiiiiight......
2005-05-10 [nokaredes]: Great! I've seen it twice now...and I paid both times!
2005-05-10 [nokaredes]: so...who here is a member of BaltBalt?
2005-05-10 [nokaredes]: I wanna make B's D in БалтБалт!
2005-05-10 [sara(:]: ::walks in:: Have I missed anything?
2005-05-10 [nokaredes]: *сопение...по-русски!*
2005-05-10 [nokaredes]: no, not really...me being bored, about to talk to myself again >.>
2005-05-10 [sara(:]: That can help sometimes...
2005-05-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm not sure if I ever made one on Baltbalt... oh well!
2005-05-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Capitalization is the difference between "I had to help my uncle Jack off a horse.." and "I had to help my uncle jack off a horse.."
2005-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.allthelyrics.com/cgi-bin/forum.cgi#addmessage ... (must remember to check this site for new comments)
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: (must remember to kick someone sometime soon {not necessarily someone here})
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ....*eats ramen*.....
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: nerd.
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: moronic, loquatious dork....
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: you trying to start something, nerd?! bring it! *does the matrix hand wave*
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *makes an offended noise and starts something* Yeah, gotta a problem, dork?! *makes an Agent Smith impersonation*
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: You know what cracks me up, nerd? There's a street near me called 'Anderson Avenue'...everytime I see it, I think of when Agent Smith says 'misssstur Anduuuuurson.'
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Mister Anderson........we've been ......expecting you.......we're very.....disappointed....*takes off sunglasses *......
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: *giggles insanely*
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Why do you chuckle with glee, Mister Anderson?.....Is it the fact that you know four different languages?.....
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: four...? okay, I'll go with that. // http://www.theaterhopper.com/?strip_id=430
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight.....*eats ramen*....
2005-05-11 [la vie lemon]: Piccard Drive.
2005-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: poo stew....
2005-05-11 [nokaredes]: Piccard Drive! *giggles like a crackhead*
2005-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch* zuniga!!!
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: bad dog!
2005-05-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: RAWR!!! *leaps and attacks you*
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: *is a zombie, and won't ever die*
2005-05-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *teleports you to mars*
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: *doesn't care and still won't die*
2005-05-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *blows up mars*
2005-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *enters*
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: *floats through space, twiddling her thumbs*
2005-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Mr. Anderson........welcome back......*Anderson Avenue*.....
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: :D *cough* stop that!
2005-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! Aleyna!
2005-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: .....it's better than Inocencio Ruiz Cruz Chavez Vasquez Zuniga,Jr., though.....
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: what's wrong with Aleyna?
2005-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: nuttin'.....I just laugh at people's name without thinking about mine......
2005-05-12 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes*
2005-05-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: that isn't your name!!! you can't just add random names in there!!!
2005-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: uh .......
2005-05-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ....... hu
2005-05-13 [nokaredes]: ......h
2005-05-14 [Tapestry of Destiny]: wtf?
2005-05-14 [Soroptimist]: but she did! >.<
2005-05-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Where is [The Bad Turkey]?
2005-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: You are not an employee, so you have no right to call that person a "customer".......unless you are selling that person something else.......... ick! Hullo, and welcome to the ever undisinfected, sewage-ravaged, padawan-strewn, infamous Bob's Diner! I would ask you to join, but since some stupid weenie is whining about his so-called year of "work" on his puny "empire", I can't!
2005-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuuuuuuuuuuure you would, weenie....
2005-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: the chickens aren't here....they're just a figment of your imagination
2005-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!!!!
2005-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: just kiddin'...
2005-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: your's, maybe.....
2005-05-16 [nokaredes]: *does the 6670 comment dance*
2005-05-16 [nokaredes]: and bluesoulsearcher isn't allowed to be banned!
2005-05-16 [nokaredes]: cheater!
2005-05-17 [aphrodizzeeack]: Hi... ummm... just wondering... could I get a table?
2005-05-17 [aphrodizzeeack]: *ducks* wow that was close, what kind of service do you call this? I'm ment to be a valued customer!
2005-05-17 [nokaredes]: [aphrodizzeeack] must be new.
2005-05-17 [aphrodizzeeack]: Yes... yes... I admit, it's true... it's all true!
2005-05-17 [PixieStickChick]: poor [aphrodizzeeack] doesn't know what he's getting himself into
2005-05-17 [nokaredes]: he does now. that was a prime example of B's D. -.-
2005-05-18 [aphrodizzeeack]: *burst back in with feathers everywhere* Thats MR LONG NAME TO YOU!!! And I want this fried chicken *holds up a pluked chicken*
2005-05-18 [nokaredes]: Sorry, Mr. Long Name, you do not have a reservation and we do not seem to have a fryer. You'll have to come back. ^_^;
2005-05-19 [aphrodizzeeack]: Ok, well thank youfor your time and sorry about that chicken :-s *lays it on the table carefully*
2005-05-19 [nokaredes]: *cheerily waves good-bye to [aphrodizzeeack], then goes to the back room to box [Sagacious Turkey]'s ears until he REPAIRS B'S D!*
2005-05-19 [nokaredes]: Hey, why are all [Sagacious Turkey]'s comments deleted? *has the 6670 comment dance back because of that* *dances* *can't dance* *doesn't care*
2005-05-19 [ArchangelGabriel]: WOOW... Dude, like what happened here?
2005-05-20 [nokaredes]: Dunno...they're messing it up. >.< // http://news.yahoo.com/s/ct/20050519/cr_ct/ownersofjaywalkingchickengetticket
2005-05-20 [PixieStickChick]: there... messy no more
2005-05-20 [nokaredes]: Yay!
2005-05-20 [PixieStickChick]: lol
2005-05-20 [nokaredes]: Have you seen Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith yet?
2005-05-20 [PixieStickChick]: I was never a big star wars fan... have you seen it?
2005-05-20 [nokaredes]: No...
2005-05-20 [PixieStickChick]: do you like star wars?
2005-05-20 [nokaredes]: Yes! But I saw the others in the wrong order, so I'm confused, and have to wait to see it until I can get my movies straight.
2005-05-20 [aphrodizzeeack]: Hello... I couldn't find anywhere else to eat so I decided to come back, oh well! Oh and by the way, I watched the first screening of Star Wars 3 because I had nothing better to do, it's AMAZING loads of lightsayber action!
2005-05-20 [PixieStickChick]: I don't think I've ever seen a star wars movie... ever...
2005-05-20 [PixieStickChick]: Well Mr Long Name, we don't serve anything edible here, but if you would like something to unclog your pipes I recommend the Fried N00b! *eyes [aphrodizzeeack] evily, and picks up her butcher knife*
2005-05-20 [BaBiiPhAtGrL09]: hey ppl!!
2005-05-20 [nokaredes]: *is xenophobic* *is frightened by all the new B's D patrons*
2005-05-21 [PixieStickChick]: I'm not new
2005-05-21 [nokaredes]: I know...
2005-05-21 [nokaredes]: 
2005-05-21 [nokaredes]: The Empire sits back.
2005-05-21 [aphrodizzeeack]: Ummm... I was thinking maybe I could get two 'Godzilla Eggs' with some 'French Toast' and a side order of salad that isn't on the menu, oh and can I get [RA\/E/\/]'s mums Juice with that please? She makes it her self from home made stuff!
2005-05-21 [ArchangelGabriel]: Don't you serve spam spam spam spam spam spam eggs and spam here?
2005-05-21 [PixieStickChick]: *throws Mr. Long Names's food at him* We don't serve spam but we have maps
2005-05-21 [nokaredes]: Here's some spam: Do my polls! lol
2005-05-21 [ArchangelGabriel]: Obviously there aren't any monty python fans here then.... *sings* Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam Spam
2005-05-21 [PixieStickChick]: o.O I think I smell some roast nOOb. *eyes [ArchangelGabriel]*
2005-05-21 [ArchangelGabriel]: Have non of you ever heard of the Spam song my monty python? You must of at least heard of Monty pytho, right? Dead parrot sketch, the holy grail, Life of brian?
2005-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yay, I get to erase Bob's Diner again!
2005-05-22 [spitfire_35121]: *smacks head*
2005-05-22 [spitfire_35121]: stupid david forgot to log out of his name...
2005-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: what happened while I was gone? [Your house]
2005-05-22 [spitfire_35121]: It was raped... I'm gonna do my vocabulary... you do my end-of-chapter questions...
2005-05-22 [PixieStickChick]: *flicks nc's nose* bad nc! no erasing!!
2005-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: uh....... yes......erase good.....
2005-05-22 [nokaredes]: I can't eat any ramen for the entire month of August...
2005-05-22 [PixieStickChick]: why is it lent?
2005-05-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *stares at pixie*
2005-05-23 [nokaredes]: Well, I don't think it's Lent...but if it is, that's not why. ^_^
2005-05-23 [PixieStickChick]: oh I thought it might have been lent like in the movie 40 Days and 40 Nights where Josh had to give up all things concerning sex... guess not ^_^
2005-05-24 [spitfire_35121]: *twitches*
2005-05-24 [PixieStickChick]: *pokes the twitchin turkey*
2005-05-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitches*
2005-05-24 [PixieStickChick]: *pokes ramen for brains*
2005-05-24 [Acidic Khemica]: ...
2005-05-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats his brains*
2005-05-24 [Acidic Khemica]: *sits*
2005-05-24 [PixieStickChick]: *stares at intelligent*
2005-05-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the termites attack Acidic... as usual*
2005-05-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *they burst into flames*
2005-05-25 [PixieStickChick]: *stares at the fire-mites*
2005-05-25 [nokaredes]: Do you know the entire population of ET, or just my friends' list?
2005-05-25 [Acidic Khemica]: *sigh*
2005-05-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: just your friends' list... ^_^
2005-05-26 [nokaredes]: *smacks head*
2005-05-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks your head*
2005-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... not much goin' on in the ol' diner now that nc's manager...
2005-05-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Where is the bad turkey?
2005-05-29 [nokaredes]: No, it's because I've been off for two days...but the good news is that I have DSL now! (It's literally 1000x faster that dial-up.) It's wireless, too. I'm in my bedroom and on the internet! Oh, the things I could do... // [The Bad Turkey] is here. You just gotta look for him. ^_^
2005-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *waves*
2005-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm gonna get DSL.........soon.....*mutters*......stupid dial-up.....
2005-05-29 [nokaredes]: *points and laughs at NC* ;P
2005-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *makes a rude hand gesture*
2005-05-29 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *offendeder noise*
2005-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! You can't copy Till's "rude hand gesture"! *makes a rude foot gesture*
2005-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: awesome wiki: insult corner!
2005-05-29 [nokaredes]: neato! *is watching another wiki*
2005-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-05-29 [nokaredes]: yes, it is. thanks for noticing. ^_^
2005-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkk...
2005-05-30 [nokaredes]: hey, have you been to the wiki that shares NC's UN yet? you know, tried to claim it?
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* yes... unfortunatly... *has nightmares*
2005-05-30 [nokaredes]: *grins* yaoi...
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-05-30 [nokaredes]: awww...
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...wwwa
2005-05-30 [nokaredes]: A. B. C. D. E. F. G., Gummy Bears are after me!
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Do I even dare ask...?
2005-05-30 [nokaredes]: I dunno, do you? >_>
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Now that's the question, isn't it...?
2005-05-30 [nokaredes]: Apparently.
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-05-30 [sara(:]: How interesting...
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Quiet little girl... grown-ups are talking here...
2005-05-30 [sara(:]: Pfffft! Anyway, tell me who told Jr...about the Megan thing...Please....
2005-05-30 [sara(:]: 
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hah! Yeah right, like I'd tell you... Casey says Megan yelled at him 'cause she thought he told me...
2005-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: And by "Megan thing", do you mean the thing about her getting "humped" in a van in a pasture by an eighteen year old with a few other people...?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *a pack of cyber bears burst in and raid the refrigerator*
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: *grins*
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *edited the staff list*
2005-05-31 [BaBiiPhAtGrL09]: yall have some "great" food here....
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well, "thank you"... That's so "nice" of "you"...
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Stalking the wild nc-17
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: hey
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: I saw ur brother dustin...ha ha..
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: where...?
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: at the skool (elementry)
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: at the skool (elementry) where were u?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: home...
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......riiiiiiiight........
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: lol...i passed did u?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... riiiiiight...
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: u r mean for what u did 2 barney
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: what grades did u make?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: jr. u need to get yours
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: none of ur affair dustin
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: you know... you're supposed to be banned from this wiki...
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: No.....not really....
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: ugh...these 10MPS computers are so slow compared to the 54MBS I've gotten used to at home...BTW, I'm not in trouble yet...
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: not yet...? when do you plan to get in trouble...?
2005-05-31 [Bleeding of my scarz]: I am soooo confused right now
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: hey! no commenting at the same time as me!
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: whoa.......exact timing.....spooooooooooooky.....*eats ramen*.....
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: yo! mexicano! wassup?!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Deleting it again, I see...
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: you're not supposed to have this wiki, you know... you didn't fullfill your little promise...
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh......I did.................partly..........
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: that doesn't count!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: give me the wiki and I'll let you change it anyway you like...
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: no..............it's rightfully mine.....
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: rightfully my butt... you made up a guy named "Bob"... he has a Diner called "Bob's Diner"... I made it into a wiki, and seeing as how you can't copyright names, it's mine!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: let's take it to [Lerune]!
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't copyright names, but you can copyright named places!*eats ramen*.......
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: In that case, you stole the name "Bob's Diner" from a C.D.!!!
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight........
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: so it's neither of ours, but I made it in the first place, so it's mine rightfully...
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: nuh uh!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *got report card back today* *is lucky to be on*
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: heh.......what yo mammy say, Jo?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: nuthin' Mo... gots yers yet?
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: nope, why, Jo?
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: I got mine! ;)
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: You know... if you don't get it, they're gonna call your house and ask about it...
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.........no they're not!....*begins to sweat*....
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: They sent mine to 634, not 534...but there is no 634...*twilight zone music* I had to look it up online, using my new DSL...
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn DSL... *shakes fist*
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: *owns - -* ^_^
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *owns more than stars*
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... not that one... but one of your names!!!
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: which one?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yo mama!
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah ha! It's settled.......
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: What...? The tribe of rats in your house?
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: That, too, but also the fact that-WHAT?!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he...
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Chavez is preparing to fight the U.S...
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: which name?
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... look a monky! *points and runs*
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: *glares*
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: the Dictator of Venezuela........My fifth cousin!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bomb the Chavez's I say! All of 'em!
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: *sighs*
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pies*
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... they're getting rid of illegal aliens... better hide, nc!
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *flies*
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: *yawns and goes away*
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: come back here, fool!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *grabs you with a giant candycane* get back here!
2005-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: yes'm!
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-05-31 [nokaredes]: *sleepily* hiii...
2005-05-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *wideawakily* Wassup, homie?!
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: *blinks...one eye at a time* tired...
2005-06-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stares* wide awake...
2005-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Is [The Bad Turkey] still here?
2005-06-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeeeessssssss...
2005-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well he hasn't answered my message.
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: She still doesn't know...?
2005-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Are you talking to me??
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: No, Turkey.
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: even though he logged out, the jerk.
2005-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love [The Bad Turkey].
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: We know. >_> Actually, you love [Sagacious Turkey]. [Sagacious Turkey] = Dustin, [The Bad Turkey] = [Sagacious Turkey]'s clone. ;)
2005-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH????
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: He changed his name, then created a house under the name the bad turkey so that none of his enemies would pretend to be him.
2005-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Umm ok whatever you say.
2005-06-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-06-01 [nokaredes]: *smacks Turkey's head*
2005-06-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: deja vu...?
2005-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Smacks turk's head*
2005-06-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the cyber bears burst in and raid the fridge* yo! let's start on the new menu!
2005-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure! Then we can kill the prez!
2005-06-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: PREZ?!
2005-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh....... yeah...... drool.... *innocent look*....
2005-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I AM NOT A STALKER,unless of corse you talk to [gone123456].
2005-06-03 [nokaredes]: When did I say that? *innocent look*
2005-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: on the current stalker wiki thing.
2005-06-03 [nokaredes]: Well, if you're not a stalker, how did you find that wiki?
2005-06-05 [jumpy little pixie]: Fiash can swim
2005-06-05 [sara(:]: You changed it back to garfieldfoo!??? What?!
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: Yea right, I changed it AGAIN
2005-06-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *hasnt talked here in forever*
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: then get to talkin punk
2005-06-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well if i ever had somthing to effing talk about i would!
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: You don't need anything smart to talk about, I mean look at all the intelligence in the room o.O
2005-06-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: your right... *counts the collective IQ on one hand* geez... o.0
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: yes yes very sad... now I'd like a bloody rock with some lemon
2005-06-06 [sara(:]: o.o
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: o.O something wrong? *helps herself to a bloody rock w/lemon*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: If nc were here, you'd end up with a negative number IQ...
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: don't say that... even though it's so true..... and..... actually... nevermind
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: *throws a rock at garfield*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! free food! *pounces on the rock*
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: My food! *pounces on garfield*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: RAWR! *snatches rock and runs*
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: *puts rock in her pocket then chases after garfield*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hops on a jet and flies away*
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: damn! I'll get you fooooo!!! *hijacks a fighter jet and follws garfield*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *skydives into a jetski* NEVER!!!
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: *ejects out of the plane and lands in a speed boat*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* *jumps off the jetski and into a submarine* You'll never catch me, now!
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: Oh yes I will! Muahahaha *jumps onto a remote controled torpedo*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dispatches spare parts, making you collide with them* *surfaces and gets in a race car*
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: *navigates through the spare parts breaks the surface of the water* *pushes a button on her remote and a boulder drops on garfield and his race car*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *leaps out just in time and runs into a dark allyway*
2005-06-06 [PixieStickChick]: *chases you down the alley and corners you*
2005-06-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *does a jedi leap and grabs onto the building above* *runs across the rooftops*
2005-06-07 [PixieStickChick]: *runs up the wall and jumps onto the same roof* *runs after you and jumps on you knocking you to the floor*
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is wearing grease cologne* *slips away onto the back of a speeding train*
2005-06-07 [nokaredes]: Wouldn't you fall off the train?
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is wearing rubber shoes*
2005-06-07 [sara(:]: "shoes" is it?
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... yeah... "shoes"...
2005-06-07 [nokaredes]: My mom says I can either go on my daily walk (no dog jokes, please...) or use the Internet.
2005-06-07 [nokaredes]: And since she thinks I'm going to the park to do Speed with the neighborhood kids, guess which on I picked?
2005-06-07 [sara(:]: Ummm..The walk?
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: internet! internet!
2005-06-07 [nokaredes]: ...you people. -_-
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes?
2005-06-07 [nokaredes]: ...are weird. Do I really need to spell that out?
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure...
2005-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: W-E-I-R-D! weird! hooray!
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Role Playing RP!
2005-06-08 [PixieStickChick]: *is sick*
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *isn't sick*
2005-06-08 [PixieStickChick]: *donated blood*
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *donated sperm*
2005-06-08 [PixieStickChick]: eewwwwww!!!!!!!!
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: jeewwwwwww!!!!!!
2005-06-08 [sara(:]: Jew?! Where?!!! -hides-
2005-06-08 [PixieStickChick]: jew? Jew? JEW????!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! *runs away*
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: The Jews have invaded!!! Run for your lives!!!
2005-06-08 [PixieStickChick]: *pulls out a giant oven* Bring it on!
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: WH- WHAT?!
2005-06-08 [PixieStickChick]: Stand back, this could get ugly! Muahahahaha!!!
2005-06-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *screams and runs in circles*
2005-06-08 [nokaredes]: 'When in danger, or in doubt, run in circles, scream and shout!' XD
2005-06-09 [PixieStickChick]: *starts grabbing jew and throwing them in the oven* *'accidently' throws in moon fire* oopsy....
2005-06-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh well... she's not too big a loss...
2005-06-09 [Bleeding of my scarz]: meanny
2005-06-09 [PixieStickChick]: *keeps throwing jews into the oven and throws in [Mortified Penguin] too*
2005-06-09 [Bleeding of my scarz]: jews? *stares in confusion* lol pore [Mortified Penguin]
2005-06-09 [PixieStickChick]: Ohh good idea! *pours [Mortified Penguin]'s ashes onto the menu
2005-06-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hooray! I sure as heck ain't buyin' that ash hole...
2005-06-09 [PixieStickChick]: ugh! *throws in [Narrator]'s lame attempt at a joke
2005-06-09 [nokaredes]: *throws in [Sagacious Turkey]*
2005-06-09 [PixieStickChick]: *throws in [nokaredes]*
2005-06-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch* *reaches out and grabs pixiestickchick*
2005-06-09 [PixieStickChick]: *knocks [Sagacious Turkey] out of the oven*
2005-06-09 [sara(:]: o.o
2005-06-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight... more jews!
2005-06-09 [sara(:]: -runs and hides- Damn dirty jews!
2005-06-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Get your hands off me, you damn dirty Jews!!!
2005-06-10 [Bleeding of my scarz]: hey no language!!
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: Vous gens sont étranges. (pardon my French ^_^;)
2005-06-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* oh, the irony!!!
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: *smacks your head*
2005-06-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Thou shalt not smackest thine lord, ye knave! Or thou shalt feal my wrath! *gets out Tickle Me Elmo* I have an Elmo, and I know how to use it!!!
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: ELMO!!!!!
2005-06-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *brandishes Elmo threateningly*
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: ...*likes Elmo*
2005-06-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... barney!!!
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: *owns a Barney stuffie*
2005-06-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: AAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: ^_^
2005-06-10 [la vie lemon]: Barney in London-slang means an argument and in Australian slang means trouble. <=fun fact. ")
2005-06-10 [nokaredes]: I knew the second one already. ^_^
2005-06-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: if your going to talk like that turkey my is replaced with mine
2005-06-11 [nokaredes]: uhhhh...oh! ha.
2005-06-11 [nokaredes]: TURKEY TAKE ME OUTTA THE GODDAMN POLL!!!!
2005-06-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... ok... I'll change it...
2005-06-11 [TheEvilHat]: O.o
2005-06-11 [nokaredes]: Turkey, I'm still in the poll.
2005-06-11 [TheEvilHat]: lol
2005-06-11 [nokaredes]: Yea, I've told him to take me out...about 6 times now, I think. I'll be reprting him soon...
2005-06-11 [nokaredes]: and he'll lost his badges again. ;P
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... read it again... besides... it's [Mortified Penguin]'s wiki! and the poll is part of the wiki...
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...so if you are to report anyone, report [Mortified Penguin]!
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *tut-tuts turkey* excuses excuses...
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... not excuses... loopholes! mwahahahaa!!!
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: samething
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: nuh uh!
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: a loophole is an excuse to do or not to do some thing
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: noooo... a loophole is an ambiguity (especially one in the text of a law or contract) that makes it possible to evade a difficulty or obligation... much difference...
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: not really since loophole is a synonym for excuse
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Prove it!
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: get a thesaurus and look it up
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nope not in there...
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: haha i bet you didnt even look
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yah huh!
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: riiiiiiight...
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't you backsass me!
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: uh if you says so....
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... mesa does says so...
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ah your jarjar binks now?
2005-06-12 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm*smirk*
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: If you insist...
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh goodie! hold still ive always wanted to do this... *quickly grabs jar jars tounge, oulls it out and then snaps it back into his face* tehe..
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Doesn't yoshie also have a long tongue?! *grabs your tongue and snaps it back*
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *oulls you in with her tounge and shoots you out as and egg* (i think thats how it worked in the game...)
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-06-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: so your stuck for like was it 10 or fifteen seconds in the egg
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: pretty much... *pops out*
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who is [Sagacious Turkey]?I am going to follow [The Bad Turkey] around.
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: I am the bad turkey! this is my original username... [The Bad Turkey] is a clone with my old information...
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well I am going to follow you everywhere on ET.muwhahahah
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: oooooookkkkkkkk...?
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: If your little friend is going to call me a stalker i will be a stalker.
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiight... *cackles evily*
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love you [Sagacious Turkey],give me your phone number.
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love you [Sagacious Turkey],give me your phone number.
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: Who said I'm Dustin's friend?
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah!
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... my number's (205) 274-9880... don't call me now... I'm sleeping...
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: ...sleeping? dude, you shouldn't give your number to a stalker...
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... I know... and misty, when you call tommorow, ask for "David"... it's my nickname...
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: *grins* ... *hopes no one saw that comment that was deleted*
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... one can only hope...
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: Did you see it?
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: grrrrrrrrrrrrrr I swear if that ain't your number I am going to track you down and cut your head off with my dad's buzz saw.
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: okey dokey, pokey...
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: and i am dead sirius.
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: you're dead?! shame...
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I am not I am sirius that if that isn't your number i am going to cut off your head with my dad's buzz saw first i will cut off your legs then your arms then while you are screaming i will cut your head off inch by bloody inch and laughing while you scream in agony.
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I am not I am sirius that if that isn't your number i am going to cut off your head with my dad's buzz saw first i will cut off your legs then your arms then while you are screaming i will cut your head off inch by bloody inch and laugh while you scream in agony.
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: wow. O_O and it's serious. ;P
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]:   
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *doesn't know what to say*
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: how about, 'you rock!'?
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... *thinks* CHILD PORN, AGAIN!!!
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]:   
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: oookkkkk...
2005-06-12 [there's a bluebird in my heart]: Stewy is my fetish
2005-06-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: sick, I say!
2005-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Umm.*is shocked*
2005-06-12 [nokaredes]: how come?
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *clears throat* FAIRIES!
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Because I don't know who stewy is.
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: FAIRIES?! WHERE?! *grabs net*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: AH HA HA HA HAA!!! *leaps on misty* FAIRY!!!
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *shocked as well* // *cheers Crocker on*
2005-06-13 [PixieStickChick]: *hands crocker a shoebox to put misty in*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: AH HA HA! AH HA HA HA!
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: A shoebox wouldn't hold a fairy...God, are you inexperienced. -_-
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stuffs her in the box* *starts twitching* pixie... stick... chick...? close enough! FAIRY!!! *grabs pixiestickchick*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: "phalos nuyle"...? SPANISH FOR FAIRIES!!!
2005-06-13 [PixieStickChick]: oh fine! *hands crocker her magical fairy handcuffs*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: HE'S GONE MAD!!!! RUN AWAY!!!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stuffs everyone in an anti-magic tube*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *muffled* Aw, damn. wasn't fast enough.
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHA HA HA HAA!!!
2005-06-13 [PixieStickChick]: *isn't magic* O.O
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *muffled still* you'mf gut no 'un ta commint enymore...
2005-06-13 [PixieStickChick]: *wishes she had her anit-magic tube opener* *it must be in my other pair of pants*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *drums her fingers on the side of the tube*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws the tube in the closet*
2005-06-13 [la vie lemon]: *comes to the rescue* *pushes the tubes over*
2005-06-13 [la vie lemon]: *they crack, being anti-magic, not anti-shatter* ;P
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stuffs you in the tube*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! *grabs everyone and puts them in a bullet proof tube*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...anti-magic bullet proof tube!
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *flies away before he can get her*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: flying...? FAIRY!!! I KNEW IT!!!
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: Oh, and *erases Crocker's memory*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: NOT AGAIN!!!
2005-06-13 [PixieStickChick]: *flies away while crocker is distracted* *POOF! and she's gone*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: I thought I heard fairies! I'll find you! *shakes fist*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *imagins [Sagacious Turkey] scratching his head, wondering what he was doing*
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *appears whew that was a close one*oh no they are here too*aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*runs away and disappears*
2005-06-13 [PixieStickChick]: *looks at misty* Weirdo! *poofs away again*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: aha! more fairies!!!
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:Have you seen Misty1?
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: Thinks to herself, Do I have to remove his entire brain to get rid of this fairy fetish of his...?
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:Umm that guy is weird,have you seen [~Crimson Angel~]?
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *points* There she is! Take her away!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: angels are... COUSINS OF FAIRIES!!!
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:ok.*jumps on [~Crimson Angel~]and drags her away to stalker prison*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: I was thinking something more along the lines of Hell...but, maybe they're the same place. Considering I've never been to either one, I wouldn't know.
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: FAIRY!!! YAAAAHHH!!! *chases you*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *has fun staying just out of Crocker's reach* Nyah-nyah-nyah!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: tisk tisk tisk... I'm Crocker! *jumps in a giant robot suit and flies after you*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *still is just out of reach* Nyah-nyah-nyah!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *uses net to snatch you*
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: *goes through the net*
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo I don't want to go to stalker prison I was framed,Angel.
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: ...
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *captures the angel* ...FAIRY!!!
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: 0.0
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: Fairy has a 'y,' dumbass.
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: You call that an emoticon?! you get an F!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: duh, it has a Y...
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:Well I am not the judge so you have to go unless you want a trial,but your jury will be [Sagacious Turkey],[nokaredes],and weasel2,and the person who acused you of being a stalker will be against you,and i will be your lawyer.
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: o.0
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: thank you Angel.
2005-06-13 [nokaredes]: I can't be the prosecution and on the jury...it's immoral!
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: hmm
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: this looks like a job for one of my old unsucessful wikis... the courts of elftown!
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:oh well then [Acidic Khemica] will take your place on the jury and [cool rj],and [nut_buster] will be on there too.*screams court is now in sesion*
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: I call judge!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: just click "case 1" on the wiki...
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:[GOB]is the judge you are part of the jury.
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: huh what i dont even know what is going on !!! 0.0
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: never! I'm judge!
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: acidic is on the jury!
2005-06-13 [GOB]: im comfused
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: im lost
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:you are not the judge cause you are not qulified to be the judge cause you are crazy.
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... I'm the only sane one... everyone else is crazy!!!
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: ..o.0
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:shut up and sit with the jury or i am going to throw you out of the court room,oh good the judge [GOB] is here.
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: uh....okay
2005-06-13 [GOB]: sorry im leaving work called i need to go in
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:ok [Sagacious Turkey] is the judge.
2005-06-13 [Acidic Khemica]: o.0
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Angel:I call [nokaredes] to the stand.
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Not this wiki! on the courts of elftown! case 1!
2005-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-06-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Okay........... here's the deal, Crockpot....... I'm judge, and you're a spectator......
2005-06-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: pipe down, mexican... you're the lawyer...
2005-06-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Umm who is who?
2005-06-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nc...
2005-06-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH??
2005-06-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHA?!
2005-06-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Go to the case it is so slow.
2005-06-15 [la vie lemon]: This place is slow too.
2005-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: It wouldn't... if it wasn't for [Mortified Penguin] and [nokaredes]!
2005-06-15 [la vie lemon]: [nokaredes] left, you know...
2005-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: exactly...
2005-06-15 [la vie lemon]: riiiiiiight...
2005-06-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmm
2005-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: good-bye.
2005-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: tootles poodles...
2005-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: tootles poodles??WHAT THE BLOODY HELL DOES THAT MEAN??!!
2005-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: In other words... Goodbye, you flea infested mutt with bad hair...
2005-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: I AM NOT A POODLE!!!
2005-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-06-16 [la vie lemon]: If only I had Allie's rhyming dictionary right now...
2005-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: DIE AND CRY!!
2005-06-16 [la vie lemon]: ...and good-bye.
2005-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: try www.rhymezone.com !
2005-06-16 [la vie lemon]: *adds to her favorites*
2005-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: umm ok
2005-06-17 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *sneazes*
2005-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm going to kill Phalos and Nc if they don't get their arses back here... they're killing the wiki!!!
2005-06-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ooo good idea... *takes a dull knife and randomly stabs places in the wiki*
2005-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-06-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *continues to stab the wiki, hitting turkeys foot in the process*
2005-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... *hacks the wiki with an axe*
2005-06-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT IN THE WORLD ARE YOU DOING?
2005-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Cosidering hacking you... what in the world are you doing...?
2005-06-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im killing the wiki. what does it look like im doing? *wipes wiki blodd out of her eyes*
2005-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: but how can you kill a wiki?
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: like this *stabs at misty's SN*
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Happy 27th birthday, Garfield!!! Celebrate, biatches!!!
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: boo! *like nermal better or the spider thatas always getting squished with the coffee cup*
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: sooo... you like Nermal and spiders, eh? *squashes you*
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *is to big to be squished*
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens bust in and drag you screaming into the street*
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you know... this is only the second time the chickens have ever done any thing to me? and they have been rather lazy lately...
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's all you-know-whos' falts!
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yours?
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* noooo... [nokaredes] and [Mortified Penguin]! *the pride of lions leap in and drag you into a dark alleyway and commence to probe you*
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o0 *thinks this one is definatly new* probe me where?
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: anal probes!
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ew.... your a sad sick minded little boy... you know that?
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... yes I do... do you know that...?
2005-06-19 [nokaredes]: I stopped watching this wiki...
2005-06-19 [nokaredes]: Dunno how...third time this week that I've noticed that!
2005-06-19 [nokaredes]: hmmm...must talk to Hedda about that soon...
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I occasionally accidently click it, when I try to click the "older comments" button...
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: like hell listen... any time i tried to tell him about stuff like that he just blew me off or practically screamed 'do i look like i have time for this?'
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha ha! With me, he usually says something along the lines of, "If you message me one more time, not only will I ban you, but I'll rip off your arm, beat you with it, and make you eat it..."
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have like 3 pages of messages with him... o_O
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i gave up trying to talk to him... *doesnt like talking to mindless jerk* *now wonders why shes talking with turkey...*
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yup
2005-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ????
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes
2005-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why are you talking to the bad turkey?
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes
2005-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: oooookkkkkkk...?
2005-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate [Sagacious Turkey]!
2005-06-19 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes
2005-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Finally!!!
2005-06-20 [Pheonix Ryder]: hi!!!><
2005-06-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: you got served! at bob's diner that is!! ...I've been meaning to shorten that...
2005-06-20 [nokaredes]: Hedda talks to me...Hedda likes me because I have lots of good ideas for CatHug...and I advertise for other cat-lovers...
2005-06-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hedda talks to me to... just not kindly...
2005-06-20 [nokaredes]: :D
2005-06-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *has nightmares*
2005-06-21 [raven1557]: hewo
2005-06-21 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hello aww poor turkey had a nightmare
2005-06-21 [raven1557]: thats bad
2005-06-21 [nokaredes]: Somebody go say something to [water pixie]!
2005-06-22 [raven1557]: ok
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: "Something"...? Anything...?
2005-06-22 [raven1557]: ''i dont no''...???
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: Quit confusing people. -_- That's my job! Anything, I guess, except she is the sister of someone important, and she probably knows the spamming-rules...
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... too late...
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles innocently*... next time I'm over at Nc's house, the minute he turns his back, I'm stealing Bob's Diner back...
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: sooo... who's the important cibling of hers...?
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: I wouldn't know...
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! yeah you would...
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...[Jay Ladlehaus]...?
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...[one of a kind wonder]...?
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: hellooooo...?
2005-06-22 [Bleeding of my scarz]: nope .
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: you'd better tell him, young lady... or you're in for one heck of a floggin'!
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't ask...
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: *frowns*
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tries to smile, but pulls another muscle* AAAARRRGGGHHH!!! NOT AGAIN!!!
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: *isn't amused*
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *isn't either* *is in pain*
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: *gives you Bengay*
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *washes it down with some Pepto Bismal*
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: you're not supposed to eat it...
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gags*
2005-06-22 [nokaredes]: *induces vomiting*
2005-06-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: niiice...
2005-06-22 [Bleeding of my scarz]: hey....nope....
2005-06-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hi. bye there i said my bit for today
2005-06-23 [Bleeding of my scarz]: okay......I finally can think!!...shh dustin!
2005-06-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: go to Vans Warped Tour '05 if interested
2005-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Go to Bob's Diner... again!
2005-06-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: gah! typoed... but i fixed it...
2005-06-23 [nokaredes]: 
2005-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: I missed alot didn't I?
2005-06-24 [Insaniac Yoshie]: its bobs dine... so no not really
2005-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-06-24 [BaBiiPhAtGrL09]: YOSHIES ISLAND!!!!ILOVE TH@ GAME!!!!!!
2005-06-24 [BaBiiPhAtGrL09]: THIS IS A STONERS DINER ISNT IT
2005-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles innocently* ...Well... Nc's the current owner, so... yup!
2005-06-24 [Bleeding of my scarz]: i'm lost...really...
2005-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and banned... go away...
2005-06-24 [Bleeding of my scarz]: nope...I wasn't banned!
2005-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... you were... as a great philosopher once said, "Shoo fly, don't bother me!"
2005-06-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: That is a song,and I don't think a philosopher said or wrote that.
2005-06-25 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im not a fucking game...
2005-06-25 [nokaredes]: okay, now I'm lost. O_o
2005-06-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hands you a map*
2005-06-25 [nokaredes]: *is bad with maps*
2005-06-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I will help you with that map.
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gives you a map to guide you around the other map*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: *is still lost*
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: A map, for your map's map? *hands you another map*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: *is squished under the weight of the maps*
2005-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: umm how can a map help another map??
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gives you a map to find your way out of the maps*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: *is more squished*
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pulls you out with a crane*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: *is afraid of heights*
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *digs you out*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: of the crane? O_o
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: No! I dropped you back in!
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: ...why would you do that? couldn't I get hurt?
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's a pile of maps... the worst thing that could happen is a paper cut...
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: Except you dropped me from a crane...*imagines the crane where they're building the new library, which has to be as tall as a four-story building*
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *was... uh... using a smaller crane...?*
2005-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: Misty's acting like you dropped her >_> <_<
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: That can be arranged... *grabs misty with the crane*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: *gasps*
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *um... er... sets her down gently?*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: *the crowd that was waiting to see her fall disperses*
2005-06-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...in a shark infested pool!*
2005-06-26 [nokaredes]: Does anyone recognise this song? http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/nader.php // and...does anyone know about Bob?? Is that the Bob that this Bob's Diner is named after??
2005-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills all of the sharks with my powers*
2005-06-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... this "Bob" isn't that "Bob"... Lion King!
2005-06-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: grrrrrrrrr
2005-06-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: frosted flakes! they're grrrrrrrrrrreat!
2005-06-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: no you idit I put a comment at that bob thing and they deleted it.
2005-06-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-06-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: they did.*turns into the bad turkey*riiiiiiight...
2005-06-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighter...
2005-06-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightest
2005-06-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightester...
2005-06-27 [nokaredes]: what comment?
2005-06-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: We'll never know...
2005-06-27 [nokaredes]: I guess not.
2005-06-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: new drawing in house! go now!! now i say!!
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: spammer
2005-06-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: no spamming would be this www.furcadia.com  see the difference?
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: then what did you do before? O_o
2005-06-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: You're on Bob's Diner! This is a spam/murder free zone! (most of the times)... oh, and take my polls!
2005-06-28 [ally]: Ha you're the spammer :p
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: aah! ally on B's D!
2005-06-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: aah! Allie aahing about [ally] on B's D!
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: [ally]'s on my friend's list...we have the same wiki in our respective moods, too...
2005-06-28 [ally]: *is everywhere* :p
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: *has noticed*
2005-06-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: really?! *looks around suspiciously*
2005-06-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeey... get out of my toilet!
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-06-28 [ally]: Eeew I'm everywhere but in your toilet
2005-06-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: interesting... *snaps fingers* *the gang of chickens bust in and drag you into the streets*
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: are you one of those little people in the TV? O_o
2005-06-28 [ally]: Weirndess. No I'm an ally
2005-06-28 [nokaredes]: ...an ally of the little people?
2005-06-28 [ally]: No just an ally ^^
2005-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
2005-06-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-06-28 [ally]: Where did that come from?
2005-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2005-06-29 [The Maestro]: Same place as that one I guess.
2005-06-29 [ally]: Must be a weird place O.o -*never wants to go there*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: wtf?
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: are you misunderstanding the word 'ally'...?
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: People are like slinkys not good for anything but you still can't help but smile when you throw them down a flight of stairs.
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *can relate to what misty said*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *slowly backs away*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Isn't that funny?*throws [Deireadh down a flight of stairs and then starts to smile*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: tisk tisk... *[nokaredes] lands on the extra soft moldy wood*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: have you seen Death Becomes Her? "my ass, I can see my ass!"
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwww gross.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... *goes to look it up*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Well, this one woman drank some potion so she wouldn't age, but it made her immortal. so when her husband pushes her down the stairs, her neck is broken, but she doesn't die. She stands up, and she can see her butt because her head is backwards, and she says, 'my ass! I can see my ass!' and her husband says 'There's something really wrong with your neck too.' XD
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: it's a really good movie, I recommend it.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah... can't beat the classics...
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmm ok
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight...
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiiiiiiighter
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightest...
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiighter for infinity and forever and ever.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightest for infinity and forever and ever!
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightest for infinity and forever and ever and ever!
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiightester for infinity and forever and ever and ever!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: right to infinity and beyond! XD
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *has flashbacks from fourth grade*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: hey that is not fair only me or the bad turkey can say that.RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHTESTER for infinity and beyond and forever and ever and ever!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: hehe. // nuh uh!
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... riiiiiiiight...?
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty1:eats candy,roars like wild animals,and has a pillow fight.
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hits you with a pillow*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...filled with bricks!*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ash:I think I saw a porno like this once.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: a porno... with brick pillows?!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ahahahaha!
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty1:Hey look it's crazy Gary Oldman.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: that poor Oldman...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: It puts your name automatically, you know...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Drats... this would be the perfect time to take away the usernames... if only Nc hadn't stole it again...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: darn him! *shakes fist*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: He shall suffer the wrath of... the cattleprod! Mwa ha ha haa!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: cattleprod woo!
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!*steals the cattleprod and runs away with it*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *watches as Misty burns her hands because she grabbed the wrong end*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: misty, misty, misty... *dusts off clone-o-matic and clones two cattleprods* *throws one to [nokaredes]* ...Get her!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: neato! *waits for the inevitable cattleprodfight*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: And don't forget... use the force!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Yes Master! XD
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *turns immortal and destorys the clone-o-matic then makes the cattleprods disappear*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Cheater :O
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *goes and gets the indestructable clone-o-matic from CH's B's D*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am not a cheater I am a witch.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: You forget... I cloned the clone-o-matic by using the clone-o-matic's clone!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Cheater! Cheater!
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh??*destroys all of the clone-o-matics in the universe*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: (the CH one was indestructable...) *gets a clone-o-matic from another universe*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *destroys all of the clone-o-matics in all of the universes and steals the CH one and sells it on E-bay for a millon bucks to a girl who collects cloneing machines so she can repoulate the world of dushinghimers*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: dushinghimers...?
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *is that girl*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: no there are only two dushinghimers left one boy and one girl so this girl mary is going to use the cloning machines to clone them.
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: dushinghimers...? Mary is my middle name! :P
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: brb... man fighting giant chicken on TV...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *grins*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *back* ...you gotta love television...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: yup.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... so when does the cattleprod fight take place...?
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: whenever Misty1 gets back, I suppose...unless you want to have one right now!
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: hey i thought we were gonna cattleprod [~And the wind calls her Demona~]?
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: whaa!! *falls out of the chair*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: hi.....did i starle u?
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ...no.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pulls out cattleprod*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *pulls up a chair and a bucket of popcorn*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: hey put that back......*wispers* she aint here
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: who isn't where?
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *is lost again*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: trace!
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gives you another map*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *still doesn't know how to read maps*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...AAAH!!! *forgot he was holding the cattleprod*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *gets ice*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sniffsniff* ...do I smell barbecue?!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: eew.
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *uses ice* AAAHHH!!! BRAIN FREEZE!!!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *raises eyebrow*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *but runs away before you can shave it off again!*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *country voice* dagnabit! *lassos you*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: oh no..
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *ties you to a chair* now... what was I going to do...?
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh yes... *gives you mouth-to-mouth*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *whistles*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: that never gets old... unlike my grandma's bread!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: what...doesn't get old?
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: the old- I mean young mouth-to-mouth thing...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*shaves off your eyebrows*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: T_T my poor eyebrows! soon they'll never grow back!
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: There's always fake horse tail eyebrows...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: nah...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shaves off his eyebrows* ...here you go! *hands you eyebrows* XD
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *raises non-eyebrow*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *glues on eyebrow*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ...wouldn't it have been a lot easier to not shave off my eyebrows? again?
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Then we wouldn't have had anything to talk about!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: We would have plenty to talk about...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh really? Name one thing...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: next week, we won't have to talk at night...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! But I'm so used to it, I sleep in the day now!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: I am so sleeping tomorrow night, it's not even funny...because I can't sleep during the day, because I have things to do. Until...tommorrow! XD
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have... *gulp*... chores during the day, too... *dramatic background music plays*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: I have chores too...oh, crap. >_> *goes to do some laundry she forgot about*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks his eyebrowless forehead*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Email me at, dustin_goble@hotmail.com! This means you! *points at everyone listening*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: it's okay, my mom only wanted this one shirt...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: today...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: I'm still in the poll...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Not really... it could either be you or [raiffe79]...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *sigh* I'm going to bed now...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ok... I'll take you and [raiffe79] out...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: out where...? Chinatown...?
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Goodnight...!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: thank you ^_^
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: No... Chinatown's just for you... *winkwink*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: In the poll: heeey... [Hedda]'s beating "me again!"!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: New York then! or New Orleans! :D
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...read out loud, that sentence didn't sound right...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ok... we'll go to Chinatown in New York!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Voila! Now 'me again' is tied with [Hedda]! :D Yay!
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well... see you tomorrow... I'll just wait here with my not-so-loyal-subjects and my M.I.A. Court Jester, Nc... *pokes misty with cattleprod* Fetch me something to drink!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: you might see me tomorrow...or I might pass out in traffic...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: passing out in the middle of traffic can be hazardous... take it from me... a guy with experience...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: hey, I missed a comment! XP
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dusts off tire tracks on shirt*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: you've been hit by a car? [dudeman] has been hit by three at last count...but don't bother messaging him...he forgot his password...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: actually, one was a parked car that he walked into...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: anyway...nap...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well... not so much a car, as a "go-cart"...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: 15:13 and 15:31! XD
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Same time comment again!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: go-carts go faster, usually...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: I fell out of this particular go-cart, and as if wasn't enough already, the "driver" ran over my toe...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: almost twice!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: who was the 'driver'?
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: am i missing some thing again*is lost*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ...you wouldn't if you read the previous comments...
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: i did *is still lost*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: oh, well, then I can't help you ;P
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: unless you want Dustin's giant pile of maps!
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol nah i think ni can find myself
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: The "driver" was my dear older brother's "friend"...
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: k
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dumps a pile of maps on you*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: oh heres china.....brazile......the middle of nowhere
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: actually the middle of nowhere is in Nevada! ...I think...
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: *thins for a sec* yeah i think ur right
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: hey! my brother lives in Nevada!
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: yes i know
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Which one?!
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: *keeps looking through the pile of maps* hey this ones of my moms house!
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the man-eating map slugs start crawling after you*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: * smacks it* back off
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: my favorite one ^_^
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: O__o
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: what?
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: im lost nvm
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: The maps fail again...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: maps suck.
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: at least his do.
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: dude, u need better maps
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hands you a man-eating map*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *defenestrates [PhoenixStarfire]*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: um ok....i have no clue what that means but whatever
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: XD
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: lalalala
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *giggles* ...I should stop giggling...
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: lmao
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: giggling is cool!
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: *giggles* yeah i guess......O_O i think i should stop too:)
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Whatever milks your guernsey... *giggles*
2005-06-30 [PhoenixStarfire]: -_-'
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *pokes you*
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *deflates* ...phffft!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: *gasps*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: is the water free here?
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure... *hands you a water... and an antidote*
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ...a water antidote?
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: A Bob's Diner water antidote...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ...riiiiiight...
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...leeeeeeft...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Eaaaaaast....
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Weeeeest...
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: Montgomery Avenue! lol
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-06-30 [jumpy little pixie]: im midwest is that like east
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Where'd you come from?!
2005-06-30 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-06-30 [jumpy little pixie]: i dont know you mesn where do i live where did i get this wiki someasked me to jion a long toime ago i dont rember who but anyways thats where i came from and i live in illinios
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight... join Bob's Diner!
2005-06-30 [jumpy little pixie]: i already have
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... I knew that...
2005-06-30 [jumpy little pixie]: no you didnt
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles innocently*
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Riiiiiight.
2005-06-30 [raven1557]: hello
2005-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Riiiiiihgt.  ☺
2005-06-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets out cattleprod*
2005-07-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets out an overly large cattleprod*
2005-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-07-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pokes [Sagacious Turkey] in the butt with the cattleprod so his butt says,"I love Misty1"*
2005-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws all the stupid animals Turkey made up*
2005-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws all the stupid animals Turkey made up out*
2005-07-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why did you say it twice?
2005-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: uh.......look! a monkey!
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! WHERE?!
2005-07-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH?!?!
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *gets Turkey some bandaids and whacks NC over the head with the 'overly large cattleprod'*
2005-07-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: hahaha.lmao
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: thank you, thank you. *bows*
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *claps*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: why does NC keep deleting B's D?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think it's a mental problem...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: XD
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: That would explain a lot.
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *notices the brand on his butt* WHAT?! *brands over the "misty" part with "Allie"*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shaves your artificial eyebrows off*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: QUIT SHAVING MY EYEBROWS!!
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes dear... *uses the official Bob's Diner Time Machine™ and goes back in time* *slaps himself and saves your eyebrows*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: ...as opposed to the unofficial one?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's a cheap knock-off... it only goes to the future...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight... *must go try new "join Bob's Diner" schemes*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: ohh...that explains my deja vu ^_^;
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: It doesn't seem to be working...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: what doesn't work?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: The new "join Bob's Diner" scheme...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: And where's pixiestickchick...? She needs to fix the wiki again...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: PixieStickChick isn't the only one who knows how to fix it!
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: But she's the traditional one! *coughandmyslavecough*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: I can be your slave too...*nudgenudge*
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll have to brand you... but that would ruin your beautiful skin!
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: j/k... I won't have to brand you... too much...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: riiiiiight...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: That "riiiiiight" will cost you ten cents! But being the nice guy I am, and seeing as how you're my GF, I will only charge you nine cents...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: I owe you $0.21 now...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: that's almost a quarter!
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: You're pretty deep in debt...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: ...I'll just pay you back when Danny gives me the $20 he owes me...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeeey... why does he owe you $20...?
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: ...not for why you're thinking of.
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight... by now, Nc should owe me several thousands of dollars... all the "riiiiiight"s he's used... and all the stuff he's borrowed...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: borrow some stuff back.
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: He has nothing of value...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: ...did he return what he borrowed?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: CDs, magazines, comics, clothes, and yes, even toys in our younger years...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: but did he return them?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... lost 'em all...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: lmao
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *strangles him*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: Someone still owes me my Evanescence CD...but I don't know if it's Chickyboo or [PhoenixStarfire]...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: And Nc's stupid girlfriend still has my Harry Potter book... I read a note from her to Nc that said, "I'm not going to give Dustin's Harry Potter book back."
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: At that point, I would really stop being friendly to both of them, but I guess you're a better person than I am...which Harry Potter book?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Order of the Phoenix... paperback...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: oh, I haven't read that one yet...I could get you one if you want ^^
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have a hardback one still... the paperback one came in a box set... I still have to read Star Wars too...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *chases Chickyboo with a cattleprod*
2005-07-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ahhhhhh *runs from allie*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *catches* hmm, what now?
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *hears no response*
2005-07-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hi allie
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: ...hi.
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: chickyboo! *the gang of chickens burst in and drag her into the streets*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: why do they always burst in? don't they...live here or something?
2005-07-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: y r chickens draging me into the street?
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: practically... they live in the make-out shack/outhouse out back...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: this is the first I'm hearing of the make-out shack.../outhouse...
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: it's up there *points up* under the
------------
line...
2005-07-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O ok, dustin i saw ur pic
2005-07-01 [jumpy little pixie]: .
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats ramen with chopsticks*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *eats ramen with a fork*
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *is out of chopsticks*
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *has 14 more sets of chopsticks*
2005-07-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok.... u guys hav a odd relationship
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-07-01 [nokaredes]: *points at your increasing bill*
2005-07-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: bill? I, the bad turkey, created that saying!
2005-07-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O ok like i said a weird relationship
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Define "weird"...
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: 'Of a strikingly odd or unusual character; strange' :D
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: In that case... yes... we do...
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: hehe
2005-07-02 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *makes bump for day*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you... with a cattleprod!*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... enough with the cattleprods...
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: ...as coined by Chickyboo sometime this morning...
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes chickyboo with a cattleprod*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes* you could at least wait until she's on...
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... ok... *waits while knitting another sweater*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gives you the first sweater* I made it special for you... with love in every stitch... *winkwink*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: but you're knitting her a sweater now.. *glares in her general asleep direction*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: I never said the sweater was for her!
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: ...oh. @_@
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stitches your name into it* ...wow... no wonder I'm occasionally mistaken for a girl on elftown...
2005-07-02 [Acidic Khemica]: i can see why...
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: nah...people thought I was a guy as hyperharmonie...my only solidly female UN...well, other than nostrahan iara, but not too many people knew it meant 'invisible girl'...
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* hedda's beating me again in poll! ...and that still doesn't sound right!
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: hey, you shouldn't have not voted for me. ;P
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: you can switch the two people...
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah... I'm too honest...
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... I said it! XD
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: no you didn't, I did!
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooookkkk... *slowly backs away*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *sighs*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: I suppose then that it is time for me to upload my drawing and take my leave...
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't leave!
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: why not?
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Cause... uh... um... the chickens want you to stay! *the chickens nod and eat a roasted noob*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: hmm...well...
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]:    *shudders*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is glad he's out of baby teeth*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *is too*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *moves away from the teeth-punching chickens*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *takes a picture of Bob's Diner* ...22 left!
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *giggles*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *considers knitting you a real sweater*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *refuses to raise an eyebrow*
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *puts away shaver*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: hmph.
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... ok... no more shaving... *burns shaver like in Return of the Jedi*
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-02 [jumpy little pixie]: look i have 10 fingers
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: ..yes.
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: So, who wants to know the story behind Sulfuric Towel Soup?
2005-07-02 [la vie lemon]: *from the point of view of someone who just smelled it* You don't want to. and you! Tell your mom!
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: Oh shut up. u_u
2005-07-02 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O huh?
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: Sulfuric Towel Soup is something I just added to the menu.
2005-07-02 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: sulfuric towel soup?
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: yup.
2005-07-02 [jumpy little pixie]: im so amazed
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: I really did write the last comment...I haven't stopped watching the page. O_o
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: What's wrong with you people?! COMMENT!!!!
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...
2005-07-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...good enough...?
2005-07-02 [nokaredes]: No, not really. ;P
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Monkey defecation!!!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink* They're not throwing it, are they...?
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Not yet...
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *gets a raincoat*
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hides in a box*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: Do the boxy dance!!!
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have a giant cattleprod.
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: So do I!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: Wanna have a duel with them??
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets out a two-sided giant cattleprod*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: O_O
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... bold... brb... *is going to eat cookies!*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: your sister's cookies?
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope... I made these myself! *hands you a cookie*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: I only bake when I feel sad...*happily munches cookie*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am a virgin and i am pround of it!!!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: I think you meant to go to Virgin Pride, Misty...
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight... that's not what the chickens said!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *gasp*
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: I had nothing to do with it! *points at the chickens*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am a member of Virgin Pride.
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: I never said you had something to do with it...but now you're defensive...is there something you're not telling me? // Okay...and...?
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT?!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: Dustin says you and the chickens had hot, horny group sex! :O
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah...
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: I didn't word it like that! ...but yes...
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *grins*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT?! [nokaredes] YOU BETTER CALL 911 CAUSE THERE'S ABOUT TO BE A MURDER UP IN HERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: Don't kill the chickens!! :O
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sorry... the numbers "9" and "1" have been ripped off the official Bob's Diner phone...
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *has a cellphone*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: THANKSGIVING IS ABOUT TO COME REALLY EARLY FOR ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*gets a meatclever and starts to chase [Sagacious Turkey]*
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Diner has no service...
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *misty falls in a giant pothole in the floor*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets out of the pothole and catches [Sagacious Turkey] and chops his head off then starts to rip out his feathers*oh he won't need his manhood anymore since he is dead.*chops off [Sagacious Turkey]'s manhood*
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *turkey never had any "manhood" in the first place* *has "turkeyhood"!*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: FINE THEN!!*chops off [Sagacious Turkey]'s turkeyhood*in other words his reproductive organ.
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]:  *jumps on Misty*
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Where's a delete button when you need one... *smacks head* ...stupid Nc...
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *smacks NC*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: get off of me before I chop you up in little tiny pices and serve you for thanksgiving in the turkey in other words you will be the stuffing and the stuffing goes right up the turkeys butt.
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: ooh, kinky...
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: well that is what he gets for saying that about me.
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is turned on*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is freaked out*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: he was joking! :O // maybe we should go somewhere else then >_>
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: "Bob's Makeout Shack"! ...it needs some publicity...
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah good -bye*runs away*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: Weirdo.
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes? You called...?
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *anime fall*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is having a episode* *starts to whezze* I need my inhaler!!
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hands you an anime band-aid*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: *checks backpack* Sorry, I only have mine in here >:D
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I AM HAVING AN ASMA ATTACK,I DON'T NEED A BAND-AID YOU IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *also checks backpack* ...oh yeah... I don't have a backpack!
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: He was giving that to me...
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: O WHATEVER! I STILL NEED MY INHALER!*RUNS AND GETS MY INHALER*
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's what it says on the band-aid! *points at the band-aid with your name on it*
2005-07-03 [nokaredes]: What's up with the caps lock on your keyboard Misty, is it broken? // ^__^ *hugs bandaid*
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: THAT IS BETTER!
2005-07-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: David always talks in all caps too... but he's just stupid... and the vice manager!
2005-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok whatever,no it is not broken i did that.
2005-07-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 我能從未嘲笑火雞和地獄知道...
2005-07-04 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-07-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: dont read japanese then do we?
2005-07-04 [JasperBoy05]: either that, or our computers can't read the characters...
2005-07-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: if your comp cant read the characters then it would come up as a bunch od ????
2005-07-04 [JasperBoy05]: we all know thats wrong except you
2005-07-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wha? sry im a lil slow at the moment bc i have to much going on at the moment
2005-07-04 [JasperBoy05]: take my poll
2005-07-04 [JasperBoy05]: 
2005-07-04 [Rockinmoshin]: WTF is this for? Its pointless!
2005-07-04 [JasperBoy05]: no your life is pointless
2005-07-04 [nokaredes]: *pokes*
2005-07-04 [JasperBoy05]: Happy Indepentence Day Amereica F-U Iraq
2005-07-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: that is funny.
2005-07-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: har har HARK! My cousin's finally gone... time for some peace and quiet... ooo! loud fireworks! *plays with fireworks*
2005-07-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shoots bottle rockets at turkey* 私はとどまるために耐えられる兵士である。!!!!
2005-07-05 [bloodstonedragon]: shoots bottle rocket at yoshi then hits the floor
2005-07-05 [nokaredes]: Why would you throw them in his dishes?
2005-07-05 [nokaredes]: You dish-fiend!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Wares = dishes ... unless you meant underwear...
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *lights a sparkler and throws it in [Sagacious Turkey]'s underwear*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: you forgot an 's' there, Misty...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Cheater! :O
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am not a cheater.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Meow meow meow meow...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: (aka the first line to the meow mix song)
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: I want chicken i want liver meow mix meow mix please deliver.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: You can't sing that! That is a cat's song only!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Me: =^-^= // You: :)
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am a cat,I am a black cat!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Me too, OMFG yay!
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: My name is blackie.MEOW
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Mine is Whiskers! MIAUW!!
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: I had a cat friend named Whiskers once he was a kitten he got ran over.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: I'm sorry. Hey wait! Are you threatening me?!
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I am not threatening you i was telling you about my cat friend,he was black and white.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: I had a black-and-white cat friend...
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: really??
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Yup.
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: i have two new pictures up,please go look at them,and then take my poll please.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Shameless advertising! :O
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh??
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: You're saying 'go look at my new pictures and vote on my poll'! It's advertising! :O
2005-07-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: so,will you just do it.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: No, I won't, because I already did. ;P
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bark!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-06 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: OK who let the dog out?
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh... sorry... *pokes the old man back into his cage*
2005-07-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hey! you need to nicer to your mother turkey...
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... ok... I'll clean out her cage...
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: oooooooooo.............megapixel.....*touches the screen*....
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Huhwhat?
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: who are you?
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Who are you?
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ......I don't know.......
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: WHAT?! You have to know...you just can't not know...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: ...and I am alone at Bob's Diner again. :\
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ......riiiiiiiight.......
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: *fines you $0.10 (because Dustin isn't here)*
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ok........let's get this straight......this diner is MINE.......no one else's.
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: okay...I don't really care because I own the CatHug one. :P
2005-07-06 [raven1557]: i tought that bad truky oned this one
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: He used to...NC stole it! :O
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: (allegedly)
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ok........let's get this straight......this diner is MINE.......no one else's.
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight... *pimp slaps nc* ...it's his legally, but not morally...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: suuure it is...
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: It is , punk!
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *charges you 9 cents for the "suuure"*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Hey! I know lots of people who say sure like that! X_X
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid ally way........
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *charges everyone 10 cents*
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shaves off Nc's eyebrows*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]:  *jumps on NC*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Hey wait...you're supposed to only charge me 9! T_T
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...charges you 9*
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots you* Dance, monkey, dance!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: *is King Kong* *squishes you*
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *does the riverdance*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Riverdance! XD
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *evil cackle* you've forced me to do my worst...........absolutely delete bob's diner and restart!
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pats your... back* you've already done that several times, mind you...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: :O
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... *gives [nokaredes] mouth-to-mouth*
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag Nc into the streets* *...they are attacked by the pride of lions that steal Nc and drag him into a dark alleyway, where they commence to give him a vasectomy*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: w00t! No usernames! we can go crazy! ...vasectomy? O_o
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he... *giggles* I, [Mortified Penguin], am gay!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: *smacks head* not that again...
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Mortified Penguin: Yup...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Deireadh: awesome.
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Stupid usernames...
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... fella...? Do so kindly make it where I can edit this page...
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Huhwhat?
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points to the place the "edit" button used to be*
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: oh...right...
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: How's 'bout no there, fowl?
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Just start a new B's D...or I could, since there's no chance I'd ever tell NC my password...
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Everybody knows your password......just ask Dustin....
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: No... I can always get it back... I have my ways...
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh........riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight......
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Who knows my password...?
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't make me! I'm warning you!
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Sam Fisher....
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Pixelated Gore!
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *raises hand* I do! ...I think...
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sam Fisher?!
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh.......riiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *charges you 10 cents*
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Sam Fisher......
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: From Splinter Cell?
2005-07-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHO THE HACK IS THAT?!
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Or the musician?
2005-07-06 [nokaredes]: Or the painter?
2005-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah.......SPLINTER........not Spliner....
2005-07-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Iconoclasm Bar & Grill must be destroyed! Rise my pretties! Rise!!! Mwa ha ha haa!!!
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who are your pretties??
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Everyone here, I guess...
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: mainly [nokaredes]... ;)
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww.
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: *giggles*
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate [Pillowthief] He is now on the top of my list.
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: and what is your list again...?
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *thinks of ways to get to the top of misty's list*
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: The list of people i hate is now,[Pillowthief],[toycar],[Fuck the internet],[Sagacious Turkey],[OONA],[Morganath],and[cuntface].
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Ha! You're 5th now Dustin!
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Drats...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: no he isnt.now he is fourth.
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Comment-changer. u_u
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: anyone on
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: no...
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: we've all gone to bed. ^^'
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... playa's from Alabama...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: What is wrong with being from Alabama?
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is from Alabama*
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Nothing's wrong with it...you're just not very observant, are you Misty?
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know what [Sagacious Turkey] said.
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: dude......
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... your mom is a dude...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Don't say that peoples moms aren't dudes,cause dude is another word for man.
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: no...............dudes are.............dudes..........chick!
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: sorry,I meant to say aren't dudes but i forgot the n't,but i fixed it.
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: ......dude......
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who are you calling dude??
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: dude...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Shut up [Sagacious Turkey].
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes'm...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?[Sagacious Turkey],are you [playa 101]?
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: I certainly hope not...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Are you?
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooo...
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: How do i know that you aren't [playa 101]?
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Here is my new list of people i hate,[Sagacious Turkey],[toycar],[Fuck the internet],[Pillowthief],[OONA],[Morganath],and [cuntface].
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah... you better make me first!
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Didn't you forget [Pillowthief]...?
2005-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,but i fixed it,are you happy now?
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.o turkey! she edited her comment without your permission first! shes commited a taboo!
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* not a taboo! ...what's a taboo...?
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you are turkey... in every way shape and form... -.-'
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Elvis voice* Thank you... thank you very much...
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: look it upon wikipedia why dont you? im not your f-ing teacher to be telling you what taboo is
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: I would, but it'd take too long...
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: mhmm...
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: over taken by weariness... going to bed *has to get up at 6 fucking AM* blah....
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: like i give a fucking shit what the rules are here... bitch...
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he... *pokes you with a stick*
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *eats the stick and pokes you with a white hot poker*
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: cheater!
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets out cattle prod*
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ooo goody! is it the electric kind? those are fun...
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: and who ever said i played fair?
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: The revised bible said so!
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...the one with all 15 commandments!
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ohhhhhh... i prefere my version of the bible which says i can do whatever the hell i want to
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah yes... the "Satan Edition"...
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: shut up turkey! im suppose to be going to bed remember?
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: no...
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: us turkeys have short attention spans!
2005-07-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: -.-'... go masterbate or something...
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...ok...
2005-07-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm back! Wow, that was quick...
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: hiiiiiiiiiiiii..................
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: come out.................turkey
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: am I the only one creeped out by that guy?
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Yes, it is on. ;P
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: whad..........up
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Not much!
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: uh..............creepy???????????
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: ......your comments at 14:18:34 and 14:20:20.
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: thank you..............:)
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink* You're welcome. ^_^
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: dude........were are the ...dudes!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Well, out of the current regulars...[~Crimson Angel~] never is on this early, but I am not sure where [Sagacious Turkey] is...
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: Nor do I know the whereabouts of [PixieStickChick].
2005-07-08 [playa 101]: hmmmmmm.................your right.......it is.....................early??
2005-07-08 [nokaredes]: not really...but they're odd. ^^'
2005-07-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *wonders if he should start the wiki he's been threatening to start... Bob's RP...*
2005-07-09 [nokaredes]: [playa 101] wrote "P.S. [Sagacious Turkey] EATS POO"...*is paranoid*
2005-07-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Where?! ...I'm watching you... *points a shaking finger at the supposed "[playa 101]"*
2005-07-09 [nokaredes]: I fixed it *grins*
2005-07-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Thank'y kindly, ma'am... *tips his 10-gallon hat*
2005-07-09 [nokaredes]: NP
2005-07-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gallops off on a giant chicken into another wiki*
2005-07-09 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: nice try turkey... but me no clicky linky
2005-07-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight... *considers giving the wiki back to Nc*
2005-07-09 [jumpy little pixie]: bob rocks my socks
2005-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooo... rocks rock your socks... Bob rocks your intestines with his "food"...
2005-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *blink*.............*blink*.............Going down a steep mountain is tough.............but, going down a steep mountain during a hurricane and fog...........it's just crazy........I almost died.....
2005-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* ...that's so tragic! ...almost!
2005-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...........Nose!
2005-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: .......lard!
2005-07-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: doubleu tee eff....?
2005-07-10 [nokaredes]: *shrugs*
2005-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-07-10 [raven1557]: mmmmmmoooooooooooooo
2005-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets*
2005-07-10 [raven1557]: hey thats not nice
2005-07-10 [nokaredes]: I have returned to this wiki to advertise for another: BUTT!
2005-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: MY EYES!!! AAAAHHH!!!
2005-07-10 [nokaredes]: *giggles*
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: butt?
2005-07-11 [raven1557]: nasty
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *makes her bump for the day*
2005-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight......
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *charges penguin 10 cents*
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: since when did you c/r that?
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Since 1873!
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight......
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think I'll start charging for the number of "i"s there are...
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *charges you 19 cents*
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *flips you off*
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *rips off your finger*
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *regenerates finger and goes back to watching foamy toons*
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens yell from their table* "Those cartoons suck!!!"
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yeah? and so do the chickens!
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: "oh no you didn't!" *the chickens get up and start walking towards you*
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *takes out an uzzy and kills all the chickens throwing them on the grill with lots of BBQ sauce*
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the clone-o-matic shudders and spits out another gang of chickens*
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow... i just had another guy on here propose to me... >< what the hell is it about me that attracks this kinda thing damnit ?!?!?!?!
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens propose to you*
2005-07-11 [nokaredes]: LMAO
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.0 well i suppose its better than beating me up....
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: They're saving that for the honeymoon...
2005-07-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sees the sean and starts laughing- ohhh the big bad chickens lost there fight? LMAO
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh goody... are they really? http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v334/WolfyT/chickenbutt.jpg
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of backup chickens burst in and drag WWgosai into the streets*
2005-07-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: oh wow that is so wrong
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wait... im confused... does this mean me and the chickens are getting married now? o.O
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: and yet, so true...
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Wedding Chapel!
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i dont know whether to shoot myself or OD or what now...
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bad news everyone...
2005-07-11 [nokaredes]: What?
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: The leader of the gang of chickens was arrested earlier today for charges of child molestation...
2005-07-11 [nokaredes]: u_u 
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.O really now... and the rest? are they going free?
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: He's serving 5 to 6 years in the coop... no bail...
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: The rest got off on minor charges...
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hmm... so sad... any chance of an appeal?
2005-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: nope...
2005-07-11 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shakes head sadly*
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: I just sent a report to the guards on your house! Yay for me! ...until the guards read it...
2005-07-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: a report on what?
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Your sexuality... I sent, "Dude, man... she's a dude, man!"
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Wha ha ha haa!!! *cackles* ...I removed it... I've gotten in trouble for reports like that before... the guards have no sense of humor...
2005-07-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *has no clue what your talking about...*
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sigh* ...nobody ever does... 'cept that guy... *points at Bob in a cage*
2005-07-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: that just because you... umm... you... i was going to say something nice but i forgot what it was...
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...it's the thought that counts!
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Unless you live in a dictatorship...
2005-07-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well at least you know i care... kinda... not really.. but OK!
2005-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets... and give you a ring! ...and then beat you*
2005-07-12 [Insaniac Yoshie]: aw... how sweet of them...
2005-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Holy cow that is the bigest chicken i have ever seen!
2005-07-12 [nokaredes]: who says you saw it?
2005-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: What??I was being sarcastic.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: No you weren't!
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: yes i was.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: No you weren't.
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: YES I WAS!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: NO YOU WEREN'T!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: YES I WAS! ...what...?
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...read the old comments.
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ye ol' chicken...
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: YES I WAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: NO YOU WEREN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: YES I WAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: NO YOU WEREN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of recently hired chicken bouncers addle in and seperate you two*
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: YES I WAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...they drag misty into the streets*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *we keep yelling anyway, like people on the Jerry Springer show*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: NO YOU WEREN'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah.YES I WAS FOR INFINITY AND BEYOND,AND EVER AND EVER AND EVER!!!!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...they gently pick [nokaredes] up and set her down on a cusion in the streets*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Infinity and beyond...heh...NO YOU WEREN'T FOR INFINITY TIMES INFINITY!!!!
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives the command as the evil empire of cats picks up [nokaredes] and throws her in the ocean with cement blocks on her feet*
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens attack the cats*
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *the cats eat the chickens*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: blub...blub...*blub blub*
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *saves [nokaredes]*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Yay!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Luke Skywalker style rescue*
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: [nokaredes],you were supossed to put your name on the contestants list,and the picture of your cat in the poll at Cutest Pet Polls.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Whee! // Whatever. u_u
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: What...? No metal...?
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *gives you a medal*
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,did you hear me [nokaredes]?
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Nope! n_n
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I said you were supossed to put your name on the contestants list at who has the cutest pet?,then you were supossed to put the picture of your cat in the poll at Cutest Pet Polls.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *holds ears* lalalalalalala...can't hear you...
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and I'm deaf!
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Exactly.
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup...
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: hi again
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens strip search you*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: ahh!! jesus no! not again!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: LMAO
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: what are you laughing at?! huh? im the one whos bout to be stark naked here!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bad chickens! Don't do that! ...take him in the back room, first!
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: HEY!!!!!!!!!!! I'LL HAVE CHICKEN AND RICE FOR DINNER!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: AND I'LL HAVE YOU TOO! *points to [nokaredes]
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Insaniac Yoshie] won't like that!
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* ...WHAT?!
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: really? i didnt know.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: [Insaniac Yoshie] is marrying the chickens, since I'm fairly sure you haven't been keeping up with the comments...and don't eat me! *ducks behind a chicken*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: so why am i being striped searches?
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...new policy. Strip search anyone with the usernumber 74968. n_n
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: The chickens were just in the mood... XD
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: really? well tell the chickens to be careful with the chicken cannon i have in my pants and the and the plexy glass window i have in my shirt to shoot them at.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Huhwhat?
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens hear you and drag you into the streets*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: ok u know what.I HATE CHICKENS! THEY SHOULD ALL DIE..... so i can eat them
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *gasp*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: dont be so supprized. you know how i get when im royaly pissed
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the chickens rape [PhoenixStarfire]*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *gasp*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: *finds a ten foot rope ands the closest tree and hangs himself*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Quit making me gasp, or I'll hyperventilate and die!
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: *tries to luaugh, but chokes instead
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't do that, Allie! That's not healthy! *gives you mouth-to-mouth*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...Don't make me hurt you. I know where you live!
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: x_x
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *was threatening [PhoenixStarfire]*
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: x_x *speaks from the grave* yeah i know where you live to
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: Hey, Johnny...guess what Traci calls Andrew?? Spikey-wikey!! XD
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: I knew that!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: *can say that because she is not on*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: I know you knew...
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: really!!!!! lmao. well i guess thats just has bad as chickyboo huh
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...But Chickyboo isn't a pet name. X_O
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and it's from Garfield!
2005-07-13 [PhoenixStarfire]: yeah thats true too
2005-07-13 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: O.O I'm going to kill you guys starting with Allie
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: :P
2005-07-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *feels left out in the convo*
2005-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens pick you up for a night-on-the-town*
2005-07-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yay!
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...where are you going to go?
2005-07-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *has no clue*
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...Then they're kidnapping you! :O
2005-07-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: but they already stole my heart! their just comeing back for the rest of me! XD
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...Yea.
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: That is weird.
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: No it's not. It's Bob's Diner!
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you guys have a backwash soup on the menyou?
2005-07-13 [nokaredes]: "mmm...backwash!" ...not that I know of. Feel free to add it...
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: www.HumanForSale.com
2005-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmmmmm........*wonders who all these new people are*............Uh.............*eats ramen*.........er.........*feels akward*........S'up?
2005-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: AWKWARD
2005-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH??
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: I used to be hyperharmonie...if that helps. ^___^
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Why are you here? (I don't mean it in a bad way....)
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiight...
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... hear about the wedding...?
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: I told him. Yesterday, I think... And blame my parents!
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *blames your parents*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: Gee, thanks.
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: But you turned out allright!
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: What are you blaming my parents for, anyway...?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: You told me to...
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: No, I told NC to!
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight... What's this I hear about ASCII-images...?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *reads news* WHAT?! THEY CAN'T DO THAT!!! *goes to create an anti wiki of some sort*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: who got married?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Insaniac Yoshie] hasn't yet... she's marrying the gang of chickens!
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: soooooooooo........Dustin....how's things going between you and Brandi? (you know what I mean!)
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah yes... the girl I sat by in 5th grade and haven't seen her in over 3 years... I'd have to say... great! never been better!
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: No! I mean the one that you made out with last night!.....besides, the Brandi you're thinking about is the one you still worship and eternally love......
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes head* ...Mr. Inocencio... I find your lack of faith disturbing...
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: I could delete your comments... but... well... I'm no longer the owner...
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: You can't give me this kind of power!
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure I can!
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...unless you don't want it...
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: But you know I like to mess with comment-properties when I am the page owner...but I have it now and you can't have it! Bwahahaha...!
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *yawns*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: And it's twice as bad when I am hyper...*smacks your head*
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *glomps you*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: Eep!
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: glomps who?
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiight........Nose....
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points at [nokaredes]*
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh.......lard.....
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: If I hear another "sweet crunchy bling bling" Corn Pops commercial, I'm gonna go to your house and destroy your precious Brandi picture.....
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles* *pays the Corn Pops company to air another 100 commercials*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: I have no clue what's going on here, and it's really beginning to annoy me...
2005-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, riiiiiiiiiight.......you've heard it, no doubt....
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs* he just doesn't like corn pops is all...
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: ...but how could he not like corn pops?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: The commercials have ruined it for us all... *shakes head in shame*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: *has not seen the commercial*
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: And you don't want to, either...
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *eats cheap ramen*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: ...I'll take your word for that.
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: Hey guess what? Earlier, when I let Emily out, I let her out the *front* door...and found my newspaper on my porch! :O
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: Cheap ramen? As opposed to...what?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Didn't the news come a bit late...?
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: News? What news?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Newspaper, then...
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: I have no clue what time the newspaper comes...all I know is that it comes on Wednesday and our deliverypeople can't aim, but are supposed to leave it very much closer to the street than I found it.
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: as oppose to the $1.50 stuff i got the $.50 stuff
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: ...you have ramen that costs $1.50 and $0.50?! ...they're ripping you off. u_u
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: unless it's really good ramen...
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *has the best quality ramen for the cheapest price* did i mention i was buying by the crate ful?
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im going to kill myself. nice knowing you all.
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: o.O No no. That's bad..
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: no its good believe me...
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: Yesh, I know. But it's bad!
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: no turkey is bad... even says so in his name
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: o.O Yoo have a point..
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i always do *blows kisses at the chickens*
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: ^_^
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *will randomly post now till that post is gone and the chickens will never know it was ever there!*
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: Bwhaha!
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *randomly posts*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *randomly posts again!*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *and again*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *and again and again!*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *and.... guess what? AGAIN!!!!*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *still needs to post more randomly*
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: random random random....
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *eats cold ramen
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *gives up posting in favor of bed*
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: Lmao. oO what's ramen?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Japanese noodles! ...and a little literal weasel I made one time...
2005-07-14 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: Ooo Coolio. <3
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: ...weasel?
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... weasel...
2005-07-14 [jumpy little pixie]: weasel smell funny specially when there dead they like a fred and I WANT A MAN EATTING LAWN CHAIR OR FISH
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *a man-eating lawn chair bursts in and drags you into the streets*
2005-07-14 [nokaredes]: It's a dead man's party! :D
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ...
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ...
2005-07-14 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: yasha your gonna marry a chicken? i though you was gonna marry me!!!!!!!!!!!*cries hystarically* YOUR CHEATING ON ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! lol don't ask pplz you really dont wanna know LOL!!!!
2005-07-14 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ohh Yasha guess what!!!! I cut my shoulder and it looks REALLY nasty... it has been draining ALL day... remember that cut i got on my knee at cheyennes house? its just like that and i got it from walking up Anthonys stairs and running into the wall thing that sticks out lol it hurt!!!
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... cool! ...who are you...?
2005-07-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: HA! the chickens.... shes my lesbo biotch. iv never even been upstairs at anthony's...
2005-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... that explains it...
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i only made it as far as the couch in his livingroom... XD
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol omg yasha:P you make it sound so wrong:P you know his g/f heard about you saying you was engaged to anthiny and shes PISSED i dont blame her really lol....yea but his stairs are evil i swear...lol well im aloud up there yasha cause im like family lol aunt amy knows we wont do ne thing wrong lol
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: aunt amy isnt really my aunt lol shes my sisters best friend and anthony is my best friend...well one of them we grew up together and wee see each other as cousins so yea lol its just nasty to think of being anything BUT friends LOL!
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you make it sound like its my fault when really your the one who said we were engaged.
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: O.O
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: long story dont want to get into it here... HE watches this wiki carrie...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: your the one saying his name i was just gonna say you was engaged! lol its all good though he said she would get over it sooner or later
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *slowly backs away*
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: w/e... im not in the mmod...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: whats wrong?
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: nothing....
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: w/e your in a bad mood whats wrong?
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: pray tell...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: come on yasha i have known you for like ever did the girls give you a hard time again today?
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ohhh [Sagacious Turkey] i wanna job!!!
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i said nothing...
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *coughcoughweirdoscoughcough*
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ...ok...w/e you say
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure... suggest a job...
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ooo carrie!! i have absolutely no clue what you can be!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ummm....lol i have no clue...need a striper or lap dancer?.... no misty im not wierd im a freak get it right^.^
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs* ...why not...?
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: she wants to be paid in flavored condoms turkey!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol works
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *coughcoughweirdosandfreakscoughcough*
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ohh yea and colored!!! i like them to be colorfull...:D:D:D:D!!! good idea yoshie!!!*innocent eyes*
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol thanks you misty... oh and handcuffs and schackles for bonus:D
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im just a plan old weirdo...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol yasha there is NOTHING plain about you:P...never a boring moment lol...espesailly when we are both hyper and bored...
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: ah yes... that can get interesting...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol yes very interesting...omg lol i wish jesscia would come back from florada...we would have so much fun then LOL!
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i g2g for little bit
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: I got some flavored condoms in my last English class...I hid them but my mom found some and got mad at me! XD
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp*
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ACK! that sucks...my parents think im miss innocent...lol but im not lol im the total opposite...*inncent eyes & evil smile* bye bye yoshie!
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: my mom thinks I'm the worst...! // I still have some *nudgenudge*
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...yay!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol yay what Turkey?
2005-07-15 [la vie lemon]: That was entirely too much information. -.-
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: .......
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: huh? lol aparently i am tottaly clueless here...
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: My friend Kelsi said that she went in the girls bathroom and there was a sented condom machine in there,she had to make sure it was the girls room.
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...there are condom machines at my school ^^'
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch* ...What kind of school are they running?! ...I want to go there!
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: what has this world come to??Condom machines in girl's bathrooms and in scools.
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: We don't have thoughs at our school but they have it at White Oak!!!
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww gross!
2005-07-15 [la vie lemon]: hey! who deleted my comment?
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: *whistles innocently*
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't know.
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: What comment?*is confussed....yet again....*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: The one that I didn't delete. ^_^
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol okay? so you did delete it... Was it that bad?
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ^________^            =>
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol I guess so!
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: oookkk...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: I am REALLY confussed right about now...
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist at [nokaredes]* ...this is your doing!
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: *gasp* You dare shake your fist at me?!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Wow a fight!!! *gets popcorn and sits down in a comfy chair and watches intensly* lol
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... I didn't shake my fist! *hides fist*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: hmph.
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Awww... *Pouts*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: today I smell like mayonnaise ^^'
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: What happened to the vanilla...?
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Mayonnaise?... You sure it's mayonnaise? *innocent eyes* LOL! j/k!
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: *shrugs* // ......perv.
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol... I know...
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight......
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: *raises an eyebrow*
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *resists getting out shaver*
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: dustin, why when u join my fanclub u prmoted bob's diner as well? *raises eyebrow*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...because that's what he does...?
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh.............Turkey, why do you invite such iliterate people to Bob's?
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: I didn't invite that one...
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah! *agrees with [nokaredes]*
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: i was jokin ok geez, i just found it odd, and im not iliterate, penguine, dont be such an ass
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ....poo!
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: He spelled 'illiterate' wrong   
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: i know
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: so did you ;P
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid, it was meant to be wrong.........and, Doll killer......shut up!
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: yea i know v-v; its 'illiterate'
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... monkey defecation!
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: Murderdolls is a band. O_o
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ......a band of serial (cereal, perhaps?) killers!
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... cereal...
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats cereal (surreal?)*
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: the surreal life!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Okay? What's going on? *Confused again.*
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Another one of Turk's guests......how enlightening....
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! I didn't invite that one either!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Who's Turk?
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...[Sagacious Turkey]...?
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Oh... No I'm Yasha's friend.
2005-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Then who invites these pitiful life forms?! (no offense, anyone.......except for Turk....)
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: It's probably all the advertising we do.
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: How could that offend me?! I was the first one here!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Umm... I am confussed... I just got here today cause Yasha told me to check it out.
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... and join!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Yeah I joined to! I'm the stripper/lapdancer!!!
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ahem... You got served! At Bob's Diner that is! is where you join...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: ohh... Okay!
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiight...
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: im [nokaredes]'s friend
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: That's cool I'm [Insaniac Yoshie]'s friend.
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...but why'd you have to say it twice?
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: and you! you ain't my friend if you don't say yes...you know what I'm talking about!
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: I didn't mean to say it twice. I am kinda out of it cause I haven't sleeped in like 3 days...
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: yes i am allie im just tryin to work out a time schudule
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *wonders*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: nah...I'll go by myself. :P
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Umm... Okay... That works lol.
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: god dammit give me a time, oh i saw dark water not that scary
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooohh... that... ok...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Wow... This place is deffantly interesting lol.
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...don't make me hurt you.
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: u wanted to go see that
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hides from the wrath of Allie*
2005-07-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: now u got dustin scared
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Okay... Why are you hideing Turkey?
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: I know I wasnted to see that...I'm mad at you because you saw another movie without me! So STFU! // *hugs Dustin* ...not mad at you, sweetie...
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is hugged*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: *is hugging*
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hugs back*
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: *tickles*
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *giggles*
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: you people talk to much
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: We do not! :O
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Far from it!
2005-07-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i noticed...
2005-07-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol
2005-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you talk on this wiki like 24/7 or something?
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...most people talk on all the wikis 24/7. it's a side affect of time zones ^_^
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I mean do you talk on this wiki all day and all night every week?
2005-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...only when I'm on...
2005-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i think that was a DUH question misty
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever
2005-07-16 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol...Don't worry Misty. That's what I was thinking...
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]:  What do you think?
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *sticks out tounge at carrie*
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: aww... hes so cute
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Thank You.
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]:  vote for this cute dog at Cutest Pet Polls.
2005-07-16 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Aww! Doggies!
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Vote for him at Cutest Pet Polls please.
2005-07-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: *kicks Misty1's conversation killing comment*
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are evil.
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I'm mortified.....
2005-07-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: [Sagacious Turkey] has started charging for those "riiiiiight"s, or I'd use one there.
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: He's just working on another scam to get rich quick.............oh, and uh, riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight..............
2005-07-16 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol omg
2005-07-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: oh God, not another get-rich-quick guy...
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-07-16 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Umm... Mortified you're over using it.
2005-07-16 [Tapestry of Destiny]: he's going to get rich off of you. O.o
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiight........over using? Never! .........okay, maybe I am......... riiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-07-16 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol okay...
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: .........*eats ramen*...........*throws away ramen*..........*digs ramen cup out of trash bin*........
2005-07-16 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Ummm.... ewww...
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ??
2005-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I cleaned the trash bin today, so , generally, it's clean............I finally got that stupid piece of pizza out of it.......
2005-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are strange,like Tom Cruise,whoever that is.
2005-07-16 [la vie lemon]: he's not as bad as Tom Cruise...
2005-07-16 [Alice in Darkland]: elftown restaurant
2005-07-16 [la vie lemon]: eew, but that's normal food!
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *snickers*
2005-07-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... snickers...
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *milky-way!*
2005-07-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hersheys!*
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *babyruth!!!!*
2005-07-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chalk dust!*
2005-07-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *goes to look up the lyrics to the Corn Pops song to taunt Nc*
2005-07-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.O ok... i guess...
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love that pop's commercial.
2005-07-17 [Insaniac Yoshie]: never seen it...
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Omg... I have a killer headache...
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am sorry you have a headache.
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: It's all good lol.
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: I will feel batter soon!
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: mmm...pancake batter, I hope! :d
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol.
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Pancake batter?!what??
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Sounds good...
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeeey... I'm the one that makes fun of people's misspellings with a stupid comment that confuses misty!
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah it does sound good but why did she write it?
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist at lemon*
2005-07-17 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: Wat did emily do
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah what did she do?
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Huh?
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Sagacious Turkey],you are such a nerd.
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: Somebody had to do it. I just got here first. O.o
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol.
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wha??
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: ...riiiiight...
2005-07-17 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: v-v;
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *charges you 10 cents*
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: :D
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: My brother is gross
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: how so...?
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: *doesn't pay*
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets cattleprod*
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: *uses Allie as a shield*
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: We have this icon where it shows you where other people who use your computer go,and i looked at it and my brother has been visiting porno sites,and one of the web sites was so creppy it was called disneypornland,I think you get the picture.
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* ...cheater!
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: Allie told me once that [~And the wind calls her Demona~] paid [Pedo pete] a dollar to go to a Sailor Moon porn site at the local library...
2005-07-17 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: AHHHH *runs* CATTLEPROD!
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: who...me?
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: My cousin went to that site.
2005-07-17 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: yep i did
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate [Sagacious Turkey]!
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: cool! me too!
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: *snuffs [Sagacious Turkey]'s tiki-torch*
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are [Sagacious Turkey],how can you hate yourself?
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: I'm not [Sagacious Turkey]!!
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's fun watching people getting confused...
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: it's more fun being the person who caused it ^.^
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: No it isn't.
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... but it's not fun when you're the only person that realizes it...
2005-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah that is true.
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: ...I like candles.
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: Does anyone know what happened to "Chickyboo Davis"?
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... her disappearance must be the chickens doing...
2005-07-17 [la vie lemon]: uh oh...chicken gang...
2005-07-17 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol what's up with chickens?
2005-07-17 [nokaredes]: They're chickeny. And you?
2005-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: You'd make a great teacher...
2005-07-17 [nokaredes]: ...Thanks. O_o
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: im right here
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: cool! me too...
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ha ha the chickens didnt kiddnapped me ^v^
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...*the chickens kidnap you*
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeeey... I'm the creature keeper!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...well, boo hoo. feel free to get here first next time!
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O oook
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: not you!
2005-07-18 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Lol omg you guys are goofy.
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: nuh uh!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: goofy...? the large unattractive dog that stands on two feet and wears gloves...?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: buck teeth!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Timmy Turner!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: he he... in our "cooking" class this year, there was a utensil called the "turner"... me and Nc called it the Timmy Turner...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...why? that's just creepy!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: sooo...? Then there was the "meat tenderizer"... Trey (a local prep) hit me in the elbow with it... I bled...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...so me and nc tricked him into eating some cooking chocolate... he was unaware that it was raw, sugarless, chocolate... heh heh... that sucker... he spit it up... but we got in trouble for wasting chocolate...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...so we accused him of stealing it...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...then he got in trouble...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...but he denied it... we all ended up in trouble...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...wow... that story was stupid and unecessary...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...I threw a chair at a prep once. ^^; ...I think I was...8...since then, I have managed to avoid most preps...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: animal abuse! ...whatever did it do...?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...I don't remember. I was 8.
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...And I was 6!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...oh...right...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiight...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: exactly!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: what?!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...riiiiiiiiight...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: weirdo.
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...your point is...?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: nvm.
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: oookkk...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: this wiki's comment-count will also go down in August.
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...but not by much. *nudgenudge*
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sobs*
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: *pats you on the...back*
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is patted*
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ......*is patting*
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: comment!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: counter comment!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: *gasp*
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *yawns*
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok i missed alot
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: no you didn't.
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: uh huh......riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.....
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: don't agree with me! ...you ruined it...I miss [~Crimson Angel~]...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! You miss misty?!
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O ok wat r u ppl smokin n can i hav some?
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... you can't have any of our crack...
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: no cause im the supplier
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok fine *takes the crack n runs*
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: *points and laughs* dumbass u stole that fake stuff! dumbass
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: :p v*throws the fake stuff at u o cause a cloud of smoke*
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: haha u'll never find it heheheehehee
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *kicks u out of now where n runs* ha ha
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...I had a flour fight with Emily once...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... do tell...
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: geez dustin
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: yes please
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: not u 2
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: they're boys, what do you expect?
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: true
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: ^_^
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: CHICKYBOO DAVIS!!
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Can you people please splell right? See, it sounds wrong when you mispell........*eats Domino's pizza*........ This message goes out for all the pot-smokers........morons......
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: well sorry if we decide to spell incorrectly
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: speak for ur self chickyboo davis
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: will u stop calling me that
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: nope!
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: dork
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lanie, tell him shut up
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: oh yeah like she would agree with u
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: 'splell'? that is the first example of IRONY that I have seen for a while. // hmm...pick a side, pick a side...
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: *drinks Listerine*
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok jonny ur goin to get sick either that or drunk
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: Hey! I am the mouthwash drinker here!
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lol
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Again, it was meant to be spelled wrong, moron......
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: i know *hiccup* thats the point.....*hiccup.....burp* @_@
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: Pfft. What was I, born yesterday?
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: great here we go
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: @_@ what do ya mean here we go??? *hiccup* oh boy......the lepercon is back.....come hee little buddy *hiccup* ** rins for the lepercon**
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know, possibly......
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: I wonder if the lepercon has leprosy...
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... Mort...? earlier in your comment, you misspelled "spell" and "misspell"...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: I missed 'misspell' but I already pointed out the other...
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: blah......lepercons dont have lepresdy
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: And it should be "leprechaun"...
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: That was the point, Chuck.........and Allie....."lepercon"?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...lepresdy?
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: well lookie here dustin is Mr. Dictionary lol
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: yesh leprersy...useee i...blah*_*
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: [PhoenixStarfire] said it, Mortimer! Get your facts straight!
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: * passes out*
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes'm, More than Cars........
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ......
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... too many comments! AAAHH!!!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks Mort* ...No insulting the pretty lady!
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: http://www.freewebs.com/dark_angel87/ my website
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: *maeges to stick up his middle finger to chickyboo davis while still being passing out*
2005-07-18 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ahhh poor johnny *bites ur finger*
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: .....*pounces from the shadows* Join Bob's Diner!.......and Snape kills Dumb Door!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...Thanks for sharing.
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: You're in Bob's Diner!
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello everybody....How ya'lls been?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: Hi! I've been okay...
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: *mumbles something inaudable*
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: hmm...you know what would be cool right now?
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, Chuck! How's it hangin'?!
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: huh?#_o
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Low and to the left! You, Mort?
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: hey...howd i get a black eye?!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: What would be cool...?
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Erect and to the right!......Perhaps I said too much...>.>......
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: This is fun...but... // ?
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: #_o hey i want to know how i get this black eye!
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: .......Spoof!.....
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: It was me!! Want another? *shakes fist*
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: [nokaredes] I took your poll....And yes you Should I turn off the lightswitch....But only if you like the dark....Personly I love the dark....Dark places are cool
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: #_v no i dont want another
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: *claps* Yay! *goes to check the poll*
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I voted B!
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: LoL.....
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...okay...
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: I am so fucking bored
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: interesting...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...yup.
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello turkey....How are you?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Can anybody, besides Chuck, tell me what a "cream pie" is...?
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... pie...
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Its when a women cums out of her pussy....Duh...LoL
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: Food...?
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: As opposed to...? ([Beo-Wulf])
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Did you mean food????
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: I doubt it...
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes.......... food, that's right...............
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: Ah...I was right!
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Mort... we both know what you really meant...
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Dustin, must you be so stupid? I meant pie.........sicko.......you should be ashamed of yourself........
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes head* ...Blasphemer!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: Oups, accident. O_o
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Blasphemy?! Where?!
2005-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...You stepped in it! *points at your shoe*
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: In your mother's birth certificate! She's really 43!
2005-07-18 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh...All well...LoL
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: No....... she's 34......
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's what she wants you to believe!
2005-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes I know, how said ...........*looks at shoe*.....ick!...*wipes it on Chuck*....
2005-07-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: poor Charlie Brown...
2005-07-18 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: *feeds the floor gremlins Cinnamon Toast Crunch*
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the floor gremlins fight over the food*
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: *has a lot* *opens another box* *throws it at them*
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: ......
2005-07-19 [Beo-Wulf]: [Puts money in the cash box ($1.00)] *Gets a cup of my Coffee*
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: ...we have a cash box?
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I thought that was eaten by the termites...?
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: Wouldn't a cash box be metal?
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: we couldn't afford a metal one...
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: *donates one*
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: yay! *glomps you*
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: Eep!
2005-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight........
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: No, today is opposite day! So that's not right...!
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Assuming today was opposite day, you just said that it's not opposite day... and if it wasn't opposite day, then you just said it was opposite day...
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: ...no...
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: By "no", do you mean "yes" or "no"...?
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: ...I mean it's not opposite day, so I didn't say no...
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: not interesting... veeery not interesting...
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: normal person.
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: I think I won't make it opposite day for the rest of the week...I don't like this...it isn't fun...
2005-07-19 [nokaredes]: ...maybe not even until I don't go away on 'vacation'! D:
2005-07-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Did you just say it's opposite day for the rest of the week...? you like it...? and it's fun...?
2005-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I missed alot didn't i.
2005-07-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: I dunno...
2005-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok
2005-07-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiiight...
2005-07-20 [nokaredes]: No Dustin, I didn't ^____^
2005-07-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: wroooong...
2005-07-20 [nokaredes]: For a minute there, you showed up on my list! I wasn't confused...!
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: Bob's Diner!
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: yup.
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Interesting... veeery interesting...
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: finally... opposite day's over! ...or is it...?
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *I look straight into the camera as dramatic music plays*
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: yes, opposite day is over.
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: hence it is called opposite day.
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: exactly.
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: But if opposite day were really over, there'd be no way to prove it... because if it was "opposite day" now, you just said it wasn't over...
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *goes off to ponder*
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: okay then...what I told you earlier was true. ^_^
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: The moral of this story is, always inform of opposite day's coming before the actual day...
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: why?
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: ...why?
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: LMAO
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: because if you don't, I will be forced to explain myself...
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I hope it grows back!
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]:  Dustin likes big butts.
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Wh-what?!
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: ...I'll just...be over there now. *runs home*
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: You are home! :O I can see into your window!
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: Stalker! :O
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: Am not!
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... interesting...
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: Are too!
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: Am not!
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: Are too!
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ladies! Don't fight!
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*gets popcorn* ...ok... continue...
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: ...not of girls...
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp*
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: *steals popcorn*
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: I can see you too...
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *double gasp*
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: *stares at Turkey* ino olla agyeianing nia yarin?
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...cheater...
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: after you, m'lady...
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: ...how exactly is that cheating?
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: other language user! *points accusingly*
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: feel free to go translate it...
2005-07-21 [la vie lemon]: :D
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: La madre the Turkey!
2005-07-21 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O ok you guys r no speaking languages, since when was the diner international
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: What's with the fancy "la", Mort...?
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: ...the diner wasn't always international? racists! *is offended*
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry, uh..........typo?
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! It's not my diner anyways...
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: yes it is! and delete that comment! :O
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: stupid corn pops...... they'll have their pops, alright.....
2005-07-21 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sweet crunchy blang blang...
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: "crunchy and delicious, are you feeling ambitious?"
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... I am!
2005-07-21 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: la la la la la la la la elmos world
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *assassinates Elmo*
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Elmo was banned in Mexico for "nudity"......
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Again?! ...I thought he had reformed...?
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: No, that was Big Bird....
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh... ok...
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: But he got banned anyway......you know, illegal drug trafficing.......
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeah... I saw that on the daily news... there was a big police chase... he was five miles from the border with his hostage... the cookie monster... when he drove off the edge of a bridge... may the cookie monster rest in pieces...
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: or at least the cookies......... mmmmm...... cookies......
2005-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight...
2005-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *Gives Bob a 30-minute break*......*is working at the cash register*...........*the chickens barge in and steal the floorboards*.........wait....... those aren't floorboards.......*twitches*.......
2005-07-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2005-07-22 [jumpy little pixie]: sooooooooooo
2005-07-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Sagacious Turkey],I have a new picture up I am in it,you can go look.(I am the girl at the very end)
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the deranged cow bursts in* "Udderly lovely! Moo hoo ha haa!!!"
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Bob! Take the cow into the back to be made into Saturday's special!
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Bob wrestles the cow to the floorboardless floor*
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...right... so... how is everyone...?
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *loud screams errupt from the back room*
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Now we have Tuesday's special, too!
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the hulk bursts through the ceiling*
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...not again!
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bad Hulk! Bad boy! *whaps the Hulk with a newspaper*
2005-07-22 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: The printer would be better..
2005-07-22 [Angelic nightmares]:
*Walks in, in her wolf form* Ello mates...I do say....jolly nice place.....I"M TAKING OVER THIS DINER IN THE NAME OF ALL THAT IS WRONG AND UN-SANITARY
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: Unless you people want some other strange thing crashing in, comment!
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nevermind... didn't see that...
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh... and WHAT?!
2005-07-22 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm taking over this Wiki Turkey!
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh... ok...
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...wait... do you have an appointment...?
2005-07-22 [Angelic nightmares]: The wiki is now under NEW managment. The Gang of Chickens can do what they want, when they want too......and you.....*puts [Sagacious Turkey] into a cage* is what's for dinner....
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...heeeeey... you can't take over without an appointment first!
2005-07-22 [Angelic nightmares]: My Appointment is now
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: nooo... your appointment is in three minutes! ...now go wait in the waiting room with the rest of the ruthless dictators...
2005-07-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks to the waiting room* stupid turkey ......... *kills the rest of the dictators* Whoa....looky there....how'd that happen? I guess my meeting is NOW!
2005-07-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *slips out of the cage and skips away*
2005-07-22 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O i missed alot
2005-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi.
2005-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: pft!
2005-07-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *growls at [Sagacious Turkey]* I WILL RULE THIS DINER!!!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: The last guy that tried to take over...! ...Well... actually took over... nevermind then!
2005-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: That was me......
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight...
2005-07-23 [Angelic nightmares]: I SHALL NOT REST UNTIL I RLUE THIS DINER!!!! *falls on the floor sleeping*
2005-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: This diner will be mine! *hangs a flag with my name on it* HAHAHAHA! *looks into the waiting room*.......... hmmm........... seems that no one is in line! My appointment is nigh!
2005-07-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *Smacks [Mortified Penguin] with a cast iron frying pan* MY Appointment is NEXT
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles* ...this was all part of my diabolical plan to... take over Bob's Diner... there's only one fatal flaw... I already own Bob's Diner...
2005-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! *whacks you witha turkey* Take that!.....No, really, take it, I don't want it.......
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-07-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *Lets the turkey fall to the ground* I dont want it either!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: oh... it's on now!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens burst in and beat up random people*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: can i watch?
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...aren't you already...?
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: uhhhh......yeah your right
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: yes i said that already
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...or did you...?
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *thinks8 hmmm
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: My sock puppet, Pepito, says you're the type of guy who would question his credibility, forcing him to beat you about the head... Is Pepito telling me the truth...?
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: um no
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Pepito beats you about the head* ...behold... a prophet!
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: a false prophet!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasps* *Pepito beats you again*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *runs away*
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws Pepito at you*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *puts after burners on*
2005-07-23 [Beo-Wulf]: You peoples are weird....LoL
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Pepito burns up in the after burners* May he rest in pieces... *salutes*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *SCREEEEEEEEEEEEEEECH* **yells from a distence** AND!!! IT MAKES US UNIQUE!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: YEAH!!! ...WHY AM I YELLING?!
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: BECAUSE IM SOOO FAR OUT!
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: SHUT THE FUCK UP!!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: OH!!!! OK THEN!!!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters about you mother where you can't hear*
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *take out a sword and chases dustin*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *takes out his sword and chases chickyboo*
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hops on a chickens back* Fly, you worthless, flea-bitten, plug! *the chicken collapses*
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: aaahhhh *turns n fight johnny*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *falls on the groud at the site and laughs his ass off*
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: wat? o.O
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: u cant sword fight hahahahahahahaha!
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you both into the streets*
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: fuck u, butthole
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: hey hey hey. what did i tell u about bad words dumb fuck?
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: and wat r u doin?
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *jaw drops* slow one
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: u know wat......bite me
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Yoda voice* ...slow she is, yes...
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *kicks dustin in the knee*
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *does a cheer* Rah rah rhee! Kick 'em in the knee! Rah rah rass! ...kick 'em in the... other knee!
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lol proud family
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: lmao
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *hears thunder* sounds like a storm is coming*
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: fun *ties u to a tree* letss hope u dont get struck by lightning.
2005-07-23 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *takes of pocket knife and cuts myself free*
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: darn... there goes my chickyboo kabob...
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: never fear.*trips chicky boo, takes knife and all other wepons from her and ties her to the tree again*
2005-07-23 [nokaredes]: whoever logged into my account and quit watching this wiki for me is going to get murdered in their sleep. RAWR!
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: *turnes around to face allie* wasnt me....besides...im notthat good at hacking
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! ...who all knows your password...?
2005-07-23 [nokaredes]: ...with a name like that, I don't quite believe you. u_u // like...three people. but they all come here! >_<
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... it wasn't me! ...I'd never so anything that could possibly harm Bob's Diner's number of comments...
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: nether would i// and so what about my name. i can hack....just...not that well
2005-07-23 [nokaredes]: yea, you like it when I talk to myself here, don't you? ^^
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... it's the second best thing to you talking to me! ;)
2005-07-23 [PhoenixStarfire]: me...naw never that
2005-07-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *Screams* I WANT A SNOT SANDWITCH......HEAVY ON THAT SNOT!!!!!!
2005-07-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *makes her bump for the day*
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sneezes on a piece of bread and throws it at wiccan wolf*
2005-07-23 [nokaredes]: ...eew.
2005-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: My sock puppet, Pepito, has had insufficient sleep and has become delusional. He now believes he is Chrissie Hynde. Please give Ms. Hynde the respect she deserves...
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! You're not supposed agree!
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: Yes we are ^_^
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Sagacious Turkey],why did you ask me to be your friend?I totally said yes,but i want to know why you asked me.
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...he is trying to be friends with everyone who is friends with me >_<
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: nuh uh!
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: uh huh!
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: nuh uh!
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: uh huh!
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nuh Uh!
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: What??
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nothing... nothing at all...
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiight...
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?!
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: Exactly.
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen* ...*isn't really eating ramen*
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you mean that soup?
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...she doesn't know what ramen is! :O
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp*
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: I didn't think that was possible!
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was wonder if it is soup?
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...sorta...
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you mean that soup that is white and zigzagy?
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...maybe...
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: soup can't be zigzagy...
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever,i think i have some ramen in my pantry.
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...I have a lot of ramen, I'm going to put it all in my suitcase. my brother says he won't buy me any! >_<
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: so... you're going to be "working" at Macy's right...?
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Sagacious Turkey] is stalking me.
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: How so...?
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: You were at Anthro Lovers and now you are here.
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have good reasons for both of those... first of all... I OWN THIS WIKI!!! ...and secondly I've been on anthro lovers since it was first made by [Adnama]... so if anything, you're stalking me...
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sticks out tongue*
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: Yup. Macy's. >_> // tolja she was a stalker ^_^;
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't you get paid for working there...?
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...So?
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: as if I want to work for one of the two months I get off! >_<
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: But do you get paid...?
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: money isn't everything.
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* I know, but if you get paid, couldn't you buy your own ramen there with the money...?
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: I AM NOT A STALKER FOR INFINITY AND BEYOND AND EVER AND EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: I could...but then why should I leave this ramen that I have here at home?
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: and besides, if I pack ramen, I'll have a lot more room in my suitcase for souvenirs! XD
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...all the exclimation points have hypnotised me...[~Crimson Angel~] is not a stalker....*drools*
2005-07-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *mops up the drool on the floor*
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: @_@ [~Crimson Angel~] is not a stalker...*drools more*
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs a cross*stand back.
2005-07-24 [Kakashi101]: Wassup, homies!........ Woops! I'm a mage! How art thou, chagrined creatures?
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...you two have too many clone accounts. u_u
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: ...and [~Crimson Angel~] is not a stalker...
2005-07-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *rolls eyes and takes the mop and smacks [nokaredes] in the mouth with it*
2005-07-24 [Kakashi101]: No, this is my brother's account......
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: eew! mop! *runs away* // suuuuure...I believe that...
2005-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: [nokaredes] is scaring me!*runs away screaming*
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yo! Older Chavez in disguise as younger Chavez! Wassup?!
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: Listen to the shoes fart! *runs away from the men in white labcoats*
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitch*
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: Whee!
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: o.O
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: I love pirates!
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: ...riiiiighhht
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: have I confused you yet?
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: nope
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats artificial ramen*
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: *blinks*
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: damn, my job is not yet complete. *forms evil plans...and her most coherent sentence yet!* XD
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: *stares out into space* :P~
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: not more plans!
2005-07-24 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: *continues to daydream about a dream he had last night*
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: Don't let your mind wander - it's far too small to be let out on its own.
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Do tell...
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: i'll never tell!
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets rope to hang you with* ...so be it...
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: *pulls pockt knife and cuts rope* ok fine...beside its inappreate for small children
2005-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... I'm not that small!
2005-07-24 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: huh? o.O
2005-07-24 [PhoenixStarfire]: lmao
2005-07-24 [playa 101]: yo
2005-07-24 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: I'm back!!! Did you miss me?
2005-07-24 [nokaredes]: a whale stole me eyes x_x
2005-07-25 [raven1557]: waz up guys
2005-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: You guys need to stop writeing so much on here.
2005-07-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: noooooooooo!!!!! never!!
2005-07-26 [nokaredes]: ...may the Fleas of a Thousand Camels infest one of your erogenous zones.
2005-07-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: nooooooooooo
2005-07-26 [nokaredes]: Yes! *flaming eyes*
2005-07-26 [nokaredes]: ooh, hey, look! Dance radio! XD Amongst the ads! http://www.radiotower.com/dance-music.html?PHPSESSID=9eecffe60ee836ecda3d3384db181f10
2005-07-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: I CXANT SLEEP!
2005-07-26 [nokaredes]: ...so dance! *is an insomniac*
2005-07-26 [raven1557]: ya
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: yall are weird.
2005-07-27 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: u know it
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: HOW DARE YOU INSULT ME, STALKER!! Take that back!!
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: we are weired.
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: *eye twitch* There is no 'we' here...do you see a 'we'? Because I do not see this 'we' you speak of. *sticks nose in the air*
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are weird [nokaredes].
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: What is it, Gang-Up-On-Allie Day? *stabs Misty with a rusty spork*
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: 
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sporks are plastic they can't rust.
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: no they have meta ones too
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: Plastic does too rust! :O and yes...there are metal sporks...
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Romeo oh romeo where for art thou romeo?
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: He's not here right now, can I take a message?
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: No thanks.
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: aww, why not?
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Juliet:Romeo oh Romeo Where for art thou Romeo?
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: He's not here right now, can I take a message?
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: i dunno. ask the tree*poionts to the tree*
2005-07-27 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O since when did romeo come bac from the dead
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: *shrugs shoulders* i dunno
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: *reaches into her shorts and pulls out a unicorn*
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was quoting the play you idiot.
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: *it munches the tree*
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: i know
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: Quit insulting people Misty! *draws a sword*
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Shut up.
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: *sits down*
2005-07-27 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: misty u got serious problems
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: You first! :O // Tired, Johnny-boy?
2005-07-27 [PhoenixStarfire]: o.O oooohhh....them fighting words.
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: ...well...I guess so...
2005-07-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in and sits down by myself* Hey all...... *reaches into my bag and pulls out a mask with a happy face on it* This'll work *puts the mask on*.........
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why are you wearing a happy face mask?
2005-07-27 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: damn misty you have a serious mood swimgs dont you....you cant even take a joke try lighting up a little....you might even make friends!!!lol
2005-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have friends on here,the reson i don't have other friends is cause they can't except me for who i am they are always telling me you need to straighten your hair,you need to wear makeup,you need to wear toenail and fingernail polish,and you need to dye your hair,they are always bossing me around and telling me to change my appearance,but i don't want to.
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: uh huh...*pulls a power outage out of her pants*
2005-07-27 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O wow
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: well...I told you I was gonna! :O
2005-07-27 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok i shall pull out a puppy *pulls out [dudeman] instead* AHHHHH! ITS BEN *throws him across the room*
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: ...you mean [dudeman], she-who-cannot-spell?
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: he was at the pool after all, BTW...
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: *is bored* *pulls Martha Stweart out of her pants* O_o that explains a lot.
2005-07-27 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: wtf?
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: *grin* *continues boredom streak*
2005-07-27 [nokaredes]: ...*streaks across B's D*
2005-07-28 [nokaredes]: ...and yet no one comments. u_u You people suck!
2005-07-28 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: sorry omg ur streakin
2005-07-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: HAHAHA
2005-07-28 [nokaredes]: I'm a Patroller now! *glee*
2005-07-28 [jumpy little pixie]: ummmmmmmmmmm ha
2005-07-28 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* Just depressed *puts her head on the table*
2005-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, what happened here? .......... Why aren't the regulars on?
2005-07-28 [nokaredes]: *shrugs*
2005-07-28 [nokaredes]: ...I'm a regular.
2005-07-28 [nokaredes]: and [PhoenixStarfire] and [~Crimson Angel~] have been here long enough to be considered 'regulars'...
2005-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Not by me...... maybe [~Crimson Angel~].....
2005-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Not by me...... maybe [~Crimson Angel~].....
2005-07-28 [nokaredes]: Okay...but why did you have to type it twice?
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: 
2005-07-29 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* I'm a regular.....
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: You're more regular than I am! ...Stupid Mortimer...
2005-07-29 [♥.Flowers Of Carnage.]: I'm..unregular..
2005-07-29 [Beo-Wulf]: *Comes out of my cold damp dark place and says *Hello to [Angelic nightmares]*....Ok I must go back now....Unless I can stay?....[Angelic nightmares] can I please stay?
2005-07-29 [PhoenixStarfire]: hey ppl *pulls a monkey for, his pants* so wahts going on?
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: that didn't make any sense to me. O_o
2005-07-29 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: same here
2005-07-29 [Beo-Wulf]: ....................
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-07-29 [Beo-Wulf]: what?
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: exactly!
2005-07-29 [Beo-Wulf]: whatever.........Take Off You Hozer
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: wtf?
2005-07-29 [nokaredes]: 'I don't take coupons from giant chickens, not after last time.'
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills*
2005-07-30 [nokaredes]: ...kills who? O_o
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills again*
2005-07-30 [nokaredes]: Nope, still here! *sticks out tongue*
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am not killing anyone here.*kills twice this time*
2005-07-30 [nokaredes]: ...then why are you saying it here?
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills for the last time*
2005-07-30 [nokaredes]: ...whatever.
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *stands over five bodys laughing evily*
2005-07-30 [nokaredes]: *isn't one of them, as she just ranted about a Guard*
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *screams into the night i will never have to worry about those five girls anymore* ([nokaredes] isn't one of them.)
2005-07-30 [nokaredes]: *[nokaredes] noticed*
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs evilly as i bury the bodys of Megan Lowder,Kelsi Brickles,Lauren Gramage,Sara Andrews,and Julie Bates* muhahahaha
2005-07-30 [raven1557]: hi my hammys
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Stand back.
2005-07-30 [raven1557]: hu
2005-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Stand Back There's a huricane coming threw.
2005-07-30 [raven1557]: ok
2005-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: [I love wrestiling!!]
2005-08-01 [PhoenixStarfire]: hey ppl
2005-08-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hey wat up
2005-08-01 [PhoenixStarfire]: nm
2005-08-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: im tired
2005-08-01 [PhoenixStarfire]: meh me too *pulls a unicorn out of his pants* hey look! its flag pole!
2005-08-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: great a flag pole salute lol
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in naked*
2005-08-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ahhhhh *runs away*
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *reads past comments* *bangs gavel* Order! Order in the diner!!! *a chicken next to him says, "ok... I'll have a cheese burger and a shake"* *punches chicken*
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: X-(
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...hmm... so much for my "order" joke...
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *coughmichaeljacksonismovingtogermanycough*
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Go to love is for sissys and tell me what you see.
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... looks like a poorly made wi- AAAAHHH!!!!
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats Tibbie*
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats kitty*
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: That isn't my cat.
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... it's a bit too late for that now, isn't it?!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: nope.*clones the cat using its hair*
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...cheater...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am not a cheater.
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chants* cheater, cheater, peter eater!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: it is cheater cheater pumpkin eater,you idiot.
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiight... suuuuuuure...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: cheater cheater pumpkin eater had a wife and couldn't keep her locked in a pumpkin shell and there he kept her very well.
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...until she died like a week later...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are so weird!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bad Elvis impersonation* thank you... thank you very much...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]:  PLEASE GO TO Hermione Granger Fanz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I can't believe it's not butter! *munches on toast* *spits it out* ...what tha-?! This tastes like crap! ...I now believe it's not butter...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: monkey defecation!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever.
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... bantha fodder!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: what??
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...endangered feces!
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH??
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nothing... nothing at all...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiiight...
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: suuuuuuure...
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeaaah... right...
2005-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: [yeeeaaah... right...]
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeaaah... right...
2005-08-01 [nokaredes]: ...naked?! Damn, why wasn't I on earlier...? ...BTW, Misty...that banner violates the UAR...but I won't tell anyone...for a while... (*smacks Chickyboo*)
2005-08-01 [Beo-Wulf]: ...........
2005-08-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* WHY can't we stay friends???
2005-08-01 [Beo-Wulf]: *Looks at [Angelic nightmares]* We still can I just did not like what you said to me on the phone.....And I am sorry what I said about you and Jursey.......We still can be friends....Only if you still want to be......................................*Goes to a place to think what he did *.................I am really sorry
2005-08-01 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hey wat was that for?
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...oookkk...
2005-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Now... welcome back to... flooding the mexicans! "Ayunda! El arroyo subbe! La inundacion ya llega!" ...tune in next time to see them be chased by an alligator!
2005-08-01 [garfield the cat]: yeah... riiiiight...
2005-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't make that banner,[BlackTearsCry] did.
2005-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Surprise!
2005-08-03 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hey ppl wat up?
2005-08-03 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: not much you?
2005-08-03 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: same my mom wants to clean my room
2005-08-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *leaps in through the window and karate chops a table in half*
2005-08-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... that table will be coming out of everyone's paycheck...
2005-08-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *spontaneously combusts*
2005-08-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...hmm... that can't be healthy...
2005-08-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: You people better talk! ...don't make me get out the probes!
2005-08-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow.... your talking to yourself again.... has thisplacereallygone to hell.... wait.... it was already there... then where should it go now if its already in hell?
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs* *the devil bursts in through the window*
2005-08-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what? no chickens? do they hateme now? *gets tearful*
2005-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,yall have gone crazy,past crazy actually.
2005-08-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: and............? you just noticed? and youve been here how long?
2005-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh shut up.
2005-08-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why? its not like you listen to me anyways...
2005-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah that is true.
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: who freaking clicks 'stop watching this wiki' for me???
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: ...*gets paranoid* *starts making conspiracy theories*
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... it wasn't me... since I don't know your password anymore...
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: ...dude, my password is the same. O_o
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: suuuuuuuuure it is...
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: 
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: *eye twitch*
2005-08-05 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: why the twitch>
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes eye*
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: *gasp* x_O
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: ...is it me, or it ET's time off? O_o
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Probably just you...
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: Gee, thanks.
2005-08-05 [nokaredes]: (btw, for the mentally impaired, that was sarcasm...)
2005-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: You're welcome! ...wait... WHAT?!
2005-08-06 [nokaredes]: *giggles*
2005-08-06 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O
2005-08-06 [nokaredes]: ...face-maker.
2005-08-06 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in with a sad look on her face* Gimme a cold one......
2005-08-06 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-08-06 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hello
2005-08-06 [jumpy little pixie]: *tilt*
2005-08-06 [Beo-Wulf]: ........
2005-08-06 [nokaredes]: *points at the alarm-note* told you so! ;P
2005-08-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh... er... look! A monkey! *points and runs*
2005-08-06 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: wtf just happen here?
2005-08-07 [weasel2]: appers in diner and falls darn
2005-08-07 [nokaredes]: I told Dustin the time was off...yesterday...and I was just proven right. *sticks tongue out at Dustin* // huhwhat?
2005-08-07 [weasel2]: yesterday is done today isnot and tomorrow nvers comes
2005-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: What is today but tomorrow's yesterday...?
2005-08-07 [nokaredes]: Hey! I think you two are making fun of my name! >_<
2005-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: of course not! ...would you believe it if I said we were worshiping it...?
2005-08-07 [weasel2]: i live my life the way i put it
2005-08-07 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok.............
2005-08-07 [nokaredes]: No I wouldn't.
2005-08-07 [PixieStickChick]: Hello my lovely little fuck tards!! Who missed me?!?! :D
2005-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Who are you?! ...*giggles*
2005-08-07 [PixieStickChick]: Shut up turd!! You know who I am! :D
2005-08-07 [nokaredes]: ......
2005-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-08-07 [playa 101]: ola
2005-08-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *stands on a table and ties a noose about her neck*
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't do it!!! ...*hands you a stronger rope*... ok... go ahead...
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...August the 30th!!!
2005-08-08 [nokaredes]: ...What's August the 30th?
2005-08-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *takes the rope* Thanks.....I think
2005-08-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *ties the new rope about her neck and kicks the table out from underneath her.........hangs there for a minute then blinks* GOD D*MNIT!!!! WHY CAN"T I DIE!!!!?????
2005-08-08 [nokaredes]: I'll take a wild guess here, and say it's because you're still breathing. >_>
2005-08-08 [nokaredes]: *doesn't cut you down*
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: August 30th... you know... the elftown Bob's Diner's birthday...
2005-08-08 [nokaredes]: ...and how was I supposed to know that?
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-08-08 [nokaredes]: 
2005-08-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: funny....not
2005-08-08 [nokaredes]: :P
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... you know what they say... curiosity made the turkey look stupid...
2005-08-08 [PhoenixStarfire]: i like that icon
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...of course you do... *pats your back*
2005-08-08 [PhoenixStarfire]: thanx
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *randomly fires paintballs into the crowd*
2005-08-08 [PhoenixStarfire]: ahhh shit.,...carzy asshole
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cackles maniacally*
2005-08-08 [PhoenixStarfire]: *pulls canon out of his pants and fires at random*
2005-08-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeech... I'd wash that cannon...
2005-08-08 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O huh?!?!>
2005-08-09 [nokaredes]: ooh...I don't think anyone ever told Dustin about the pants thing...
2005-08-09 [nokaredes]: *pulls a couch out of her pants* *the unicorn munches on it*
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: yes... I read it in the past comments...
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Show me a girl who doesn't like cats and I'll show you a boy in disguise as a girl...
2005-08-09 [Acidic Khemica]: I dont like cats...
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I knew it!!!
2005-08-09 [Acidic Khemica]: .....
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight...
2005-08-09 [Acidic Khemica]: ...
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen*
2005-08-09 [JasperBoy05]: www.chillin.freewebtools.com
2005-08-09 [Angelic nightmares]: I dont like cats either....
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I KNEW IT!!!
2005-08-09 [JasperBoy05]: www.chillin.freewebtool.com check out my website
2005-08-09 [Angelic nightmares]: Knew what???
2005-08-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: nothing... nothing at all...
2005-08-10 [Soul Assassin]: i agree i don't like cats at all.
2005-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: [I LOVE CATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!]
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: me too! *eats a cat-on-a-stick*
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... cat kabob...
2005-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gasps then take all of the cats in the world and protects them with a forcefield,and a bubble city*
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Bubble city? Does that mean you can *pop* The bubble by poking at it enuf times???
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I know what you're thinking, 'cause right now I'm thinking the same thing. Actually, I've been thinking it ever since I got here: Why oh why didn't I take the BLUE pill?
2005-08-10 [raven1557]: hi
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Blue pill??? *looks confused*
2005-08-10 [raven1557]: i take those 0_o
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...[Mortified Penguin] would understand that statement...
2005-08-10 [raven1557]: hey* hits the turkey*
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiight... *shoves a nuclear warhead up your butt*
2005-08-10 [raven1557]: god damn y it hurts
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...exactly...
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hooray! The rednecks and the japanese have finally settled their differences! *eats possum flavored ramen*
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I wonder if chinese people order in Caucasian every weekend and laugh while trying to master the fork...
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *just sits there*
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the termites attack you*
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps out o the way and watches them attackt Bob*
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: poor Bob... how many times has he been fatally injured...?
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: I lost count.....
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...so has Bob...
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: poor bob *puts a red rose down by his feet*
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *an angry bee flies out of the rose and chases Bob into the street where he gets hit by a hummer* *"Hey! You dented my new hummer!!!" the man shouts as he backs over Bob twice and drives away*
2005-08-10 [jumpy little pixie]: LaLaLaLA bob
2005-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-08-10 [Angelic nightmares]: Poor bob......Didn't mean to dent the Hummer
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yall are so coocky.
2005-08-11 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: hey people wats up?
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: coocky.
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: cookie...? cocky...? kooky...?
2005-08-11 [Angelic nightmares]: Prolly Kooky......
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... kookies...
2005-08-11 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: You guys are nonsensical.
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: ...can't leave you alone. *shakes head*
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: *pulls a box of crayons out of her pants and starts drawing on one of the walls*
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the wall sludge eyes you*
2005-08-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *pokes the wall sludge with the stick*
2005-08-11 [Beo-Wulf]: .....................................................
2005-08-11 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *blinkblink* ok.......
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: *waves at the wall sludge*
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: This is for [Sagacious Turkey],I hope you enjoy it.
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: ...*wants the delete button*
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: *will have to comment it off the page*
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: *or pull a dogcatcher out of her pants* >_>
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: Snuggles the Laundry Bear is bad marketing.
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Muhahah.  
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: SNUGGLES IS BAD MARKETING BECAUSE HE SCARES PEOPLE. >:D
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: I can do this all day Misty.
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...here ya go!
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: ...Or at least the whole hour before Jackie Chan Adventures is on. >_>
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: www.google.com
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: ...If you were on, why didn't you just delete it yourself?
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: Google is cool.
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: Bwahaha!
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: boo
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: *feeds trail mix to the wall sludge*
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: ...That link is broken.
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the wall sludge sucks it up*
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: Ohh...I never told you! O_O I can drive! :D
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: *feeds it beef jerky*
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: At least that banner doesn't violate the UAR >_>
2005-08-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yay! ...I think... // *the sludge munches contently*
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: [BlackTearsCry] did it for me,do you like it?
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: I LOVE [Pablito]!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: ...Do you want me to like it?
2005-08-11 [nokaredes]: 
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am joking i don't love [Pablito],I love Rachel's ([Ƹ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄Ʒ]'s) cousin Aaron.
2005-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: HOLY SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a rock at Hermione*
2005-08-13 [Beo-Wulf]: LoL..........Good on Turkey.....
2005-08-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *hits Turkey with a stick* Dont hit my HERMY!!!!!
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs* *hits you instead*
2005-08-13 [Angelic nightmares]: That does it!! *jumps on the turkey and bites his tail feathers out* Shake your tail feathers now!
2005-08-13 [Angelic nightmares]:
USTA
2005-08-13 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lol goodness
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiight...
2005-08-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits and howls at the moon*
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the moon falls and crashes into Jefferey's 5-star, better-than-Bob's, Diner down the road*
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: *is drunk*
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: Yes, ON a wiki! >_<
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: Oh, delete your comment. Real mature.
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: Stupidhead.
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: Okay, no one's on, so I think I will go over there and play beer pong. *points* ^^
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: Why is no one here?! Ack! *dies of boredom*
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* *gives you mouth-to-mouth*
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: I knew you were going to do that. *talks while dead*
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiight...
2005-08-13 [nokaredes]: *feeds sister to the wall sludge*
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the wall sludge gets a stomach ache*
2005-08-13 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O I miss alot
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah...
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...August 30th!!!
2005-08-13 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ok...........wat's august 30?
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bob's Diner's one year anniversary, of course!
2005-08-13 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: woo hoo
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... we must celebrate!
2005-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Can i join the celebration?
2005-08-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: yay
2005-08-14 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: *sings* celebrate good times come on, come on its a celebration
2005-08-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-08-14 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lol poor dustin
2005-08-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I'm not poor! ...I'm middle class!
2005-08-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes her head slightly*
2005-08-14 [Beo-Wulf]: ..........................................
2005-08-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *gets up and walks around*
2005-08-14 [Beo-Wulf]: *Looks at [Angelic nightmares]*....Please come back here....I want to talk to you......Please have a set....Now lets talk...........
2005-08-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits down in her wolf form*
2005-08-14 [Beo-Wulf]: *Look at [Angelic nightmares]*.....I am sorry for what happend.....I really am....I am upset for the way he treated Jurs...........
2005-08-14 [Angelic nightmares]: It wasn't much of a loss tho......He says that if I want to get back with him, then I need to come find him. I ain't going back to him.....sides ma, siera, and teri are trying to convince me to go back out with Justin......tho I'm not sure.....gots a lot of thinking that needs to be done
2005-08-14 [Beo-Wulf]: Alright.....Do what you want................I will not be upset...............Just hang in there...........And please dont hurt yourself...............
2005-08-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist at the wolves* darn realistic chatter...
2005-08-14 [Beo-Wulf]: umm...Ok.....
2005-08-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats possum flavored ramen*... I should add this stuff to the menu...
2005-08-14 [Beo-Wulf]: Yumm....That sounds good....Can I get that to go please?....*Gives you $5.00*
2005-08-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeey... I'm not a prostitute! ...oh... the ramen... yeah... right... *throws a bowl at you*
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: LoL.....Thank you....hay where is my rase....And where is my paycheck?....
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -throws a rock at turkey-
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: LoL.................I need [...........Blood........]..............
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hands darkness wolf a box of cheerios* ...here's that cereal box you asked for...
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats rock*
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: What cereal?.....I did not ask for that....I asked for blood.............
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiiight... enjoy your cereal!
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: oh a wise guy.............Fine..............I will take my $5.00 back then................
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -throws another rock-
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: Thank you [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice].....*Looks around for the boss*....*Takes back my $5.00*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag both of you into the streets*
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -shifts into her wolf form and bites the chickens in half-
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pride of lions leap in*
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -growls and looks at the lions and tackles the leader clawing at it's face-
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *more chickens leap in*
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -she eats the other chickens and goes back to attacking the lions-
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the floor gremlins jump in*
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -kills a few of the gremlins and then jumps over to turkey throwing him in her place watching as the gremlins try to eat him-
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha! They won't attack their master!
2005-08-15 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: I'm back!!!!
2005-08-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: Wtf is going on?
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight... who're you?!
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: Yeah.............What is going on..........And who are you?
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and who are you...?
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *looks in the mirror* ...and who is that sexy beast?!
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: LOL
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: ooooookkkkkkkkkkkkk..............
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats more possum ramen*
2005-08-15 [Beo-Wulf]: ..........Weired..........LoL..........
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: Okay...Dustin is a dominatrix! >:D
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *goes to look that up*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: "a dominating woman (especially one who plays that role in a sadomasochistic sexual relationship)" ...what?! Is that what you meant?!
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: ...Almost. >_>
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... oookkk...
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: ...So you admit it?
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... look! a monkey! *points and runs*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *looks for the monkey*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the monkey squeaks in monkey language, "uh... er... look! a turkey!" and points and runs*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *blinkblink*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *doesn't bother looking for this supposed turkey*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *pounces*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *collapses*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *tickles*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tickles back*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *squirms*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *goes back to his possum ramen*
2005-08-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -bashes turkey over the head with a frying pan, then with one of the chickens for the gangs. she chuckles and sits at the bar watching-
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *chages into her wolf form and sits on the bar*
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: Eew...on the bar? *will never eat on the bar* >_>
2005-08-15 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: wat the hell have I been missing?
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nothing exciting...
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *nodds* 'E's got a point
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... a very pointy point at that...
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: nah...a dull, not exciting point.
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Quiet, you!
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *lays down*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the termites attack you*
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *catches the termites and trains them to do tricks. Then makes the join a travling flea circus*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! You can't do that!
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: Can to.....see *point to her last comment* I just did
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: ...Well...she just did.
2005-08-15 [nokaredes]: *growls* Don't comment first! >_<
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *puts her down down* Sorries
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...a.p.o.... and they think preps are bad...
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* preps are bad tho.....
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...not my point...
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: What was the point then??
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters*
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *tilts her head and lays back down on the bar*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the roaches attack you*
2005-08-15 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps out of the way and watches them attack bob*
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...poor Bob...
2005-08-15 [weasel2]: walks in and orders some shunck meet
2005-08-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a wad of shunck at you*
2005-08-15 [weasel2]: thanks mmmmmmmmmm bloody just like i like it and that good smeel
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: I don't like that wiki, I've been there before.
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: The feeling's mutual...
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: Pfft. That's just because I got them in trouble.
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: What'd you do?!
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: ...That's classified. >_> <_<
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... sounds suspicious!
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: And you sound paranoid.
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: nah...
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: Well, that settles it for me! *puts a sign on B's D's door: Dustin is not paranoid!*
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...You're darn straight!
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: No, I'm crooked. >_>
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *corrects you*
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: *gasp*
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pats your... back*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *streches out on the bar (still in her wolf form)*
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: *kisses [Angelic nightmares] and lightly piches her ass*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps off the bar and changes into her human self and kisses back*
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: I want an order of you to go,babe.
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *blushes* oh wow....takes you by the hand and leads you to the janitors closet*
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: *opens the door and pulls you inside* Don't mind the noise folks! *closes the door behind us*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* Oh hi bob...I didn't know this was your bedroom..... *puts bob in a frying pan* Who wants roasted Bob??
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: I do
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at you* Ya sure?
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead* ...poor fella...
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...don't forget to add pepper... (Bob's allergic to pepper)
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: yep
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *sprinkles a little bit of pepper on bob's roasted body*
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: Wow you really did roast him. I thought you meant the kind of roast you see on Comedy Central.
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...of Pamela Anderson!
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* No....told ya that Bob's diner didn't really have anything sanitary
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes head in shame* ...not even the soap... *points at the brown "soap"*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks to where you are pointing* Ewww....what exactly was that?
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: Who shaped sh*t into soap?
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *spontaniously combusts* ...darn it... that's the fourth time... this week! ...and it's only monday!!!
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *quickly changes into her wolf form tackles the turkey* Calm down....will ya?
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: How would you like to suddenly burst into flames four times... in a week! ...when it's only monday!!!
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: LOL
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: You keep sending the roaches and the termites after me..... *says a spell and brings bob back to life and in good health*
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...How many times has Bob died anyway...?
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks* OUCH!! Brain cramp! *rubs her head* Dunno....there was the time when he got hit by a H2......*thinks "I hope the hummers ok....I mean i hope bob's ok"*
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: 10th time today
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *still thinking about the hummer*
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Bob sits huddled in a corner, rocking back and forth, as the pride of lions burst in through the window and drag him screaming into the street*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *snaps out of her da dream of her and [Shade Wolf] in the back of a hummer* Damnit! *puts a protection spell on Bob* That should work......unless Bob's really meant to be dead
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: Okay
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the lions rip him to shreads... literally!* ...nah... I don't think he's meant to be dead... *an atom bomb drops on his severed limbs and head*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps and climbs into [Shade Wolf]'s arms* Protect me?
2005-08-16 [Beo-Wulf]: ....................................................
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: *okay protects*
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Your lives are expendable if necessary...
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up and smiles* Thanks hun *changes into her wolf form and licks your cheek*
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...woops... did I say that out loud...?
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: *licks your cheek back*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to you* What's the matter Turkey? You miss Tomorrows really yesterday?
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... she's only been gone and hour and twenty minutes...
2005-08-16 [Shade Wolf]: *cuddles up back*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks down at the ground and catches an ant* Here ya go turkey....have an "aunt"
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: yum... *eats it*
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: I don't like ants...*is back*
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks down at the ground and picks up a maggot* Want it?
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: nah...
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: hmm *thinks* Well....what do ya want then?
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: ...I want the chickens to beat up my sister.
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...only if she's on elftown...
2005-08-16 [Angelic nightmares]: 'E has a point...
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: yup... good ol' E... whatever happened to his brother F...?
2005-08-16 [nokaredes]: I think he failed the Elftown Academy and got kicked out. >_>
2005-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...ah yes... that explains A's outstanding academic career...
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps back on the bar and lays down* Ha ha....mesa favorite spot *tackles the turkey*
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...that's Mr. the turkey to you, fella!
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites your neck....and rips out your tail feathers*
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ick... you don't want to know what those tail feathers have been through...
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: ewww *spits them out of her mouth*
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Nelson laugh* Ha ha!
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: o_O
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... right...
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: You took my Nelson laugh.
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: And you! [Angelic nightmares]! Give him back his tail feathers!
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...well... you took Nelson's Nelson laugh!
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: *turns into a wolf and jumps onto [Angelic nightmares]*
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: Not on the bar! :O
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Oh did you just wax it?
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: ...sure...yes...that's it...
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... riiiiiight...
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: Go to bed!
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...NEVER!!! *maniacal laughter*
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: *hugs Tommorow* Love you dad! *Dances around like a lunatic*
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *rolls over and tackles [Shade Wolf] to the ground*
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: You're such a lesbian. u_u Don't ever hug me again.
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly steps back*
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: I'm a guy .
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: *goes back to making out with [Angelic nightmares]
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *tackles him to the ground and lays there while bob counts to 3* YAY!! *jumps up and down cheering*
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: I'm a girl, and you called me dad...
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *contines jumping up and down*
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: I'm sorry. I meant mom.
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Oof! *lays there while [Angelic nightmares] jumps up and down on my chest*
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *trips and lands on her butt* I'm sorry hunney
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: *gets up and is dizzy* *trips and falls to land on you.*
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *lightly bites your neck* I wuvles ooo bay-be.....Guess what? *jumps up real fast only to fall back down....then screams "I wanna be a cowboy bay-be!"*
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Save a horse ride a cowboy
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: loves you too
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: No....*shakes her head till she falls* I wanna be the cowboy tho....cause then you could ride me.....
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Okay that works
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *stands up with her finger in the air* Means....I wear the pants.....*laughs you have to waer the dress*
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *starts to twirl a laso* Yehaw!!!
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Um not quite
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *screams "free willy!"* I'm sorry huney...I'm just really happy and hyper at the moment
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Okay *kisses you*
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *kisses back* My head hurts from laughing so hard
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: I gots to pee
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: Lets go to your bedroom
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at you* oh wow
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: *looks into your eyes* Why,you don't want too?
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: want to what?
2005-08-17 [Shade Wolf]: go to your room with me
2005-08-17 [Angelic nightmares]: I do...trust me....the things I do to you...if we were alone and in my room...
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: A-hem! ...what do you people think the "Bob's Makeout Shack" wiki was made for...?
2005-08-17 [la vie lemon]: Tail feathers? kinky...
2005-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: wh- what?!
2005-08-17 [nokaredes]: *grins*
2005-08-18 [Shade Wolf]: hi
2005-08-18 [Angelic nightmares]: hiya babe!
2005-08-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...oh my god!!! -laughing in hastarics as she walks in- fucking god the chickens married....that house should be a hell hole -she sits at the bar-
2005-08-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits down by the river side and cries*
2005-08-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-08-19 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay...[Angelic nightmares]....Please dont cry....come here...*Puts his arms around you and gives you a hug*
2005-08-19 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm fine.....just something that I need to work out on my own.......
2005-08-19 [Beo-Wulf]: Well I am here for you.......
2005-08-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-08-20 [Shade Wolf]: *holds [Angelic nightmares]*
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits there crying in [Shade Wolf]'s arms*
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...So sad... *picks nose*
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up at [Shade Wolf]* I want to be with you, so much more than you can imagine....
2005-08-20 [Shade Wolf]: *wipes away your tears* I know,hun.Believe me I know. *kisses you*
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *kisses back* Then make our destiny come true.....please?
2005-08-20 [Shade Wolf]: I need to figure out how to best do it.
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: Tell Mallory the truth.....*points to #5 on the Dinner menu* I put something up there for you.....something I've never gave up for anyone....but I offically gave it up for you.....
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: Now you can look at 5 on the dinner part of the menu
2005-08-20 [Shade Wolf]: I'll try hun
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: You see what number 5 on the dinner menu is?
2005-08-20 [Shade Wolf]: Your pride and I'm glad you offer it to me .
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *munches on [Angelic nightmares]'s pride* ...mmm...
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *tackles the turkey* I dont want it anymore. Your much to important to me
2005-08-20 [Shade Wolf]: *steals the pride back * It's mine!!!!
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs*
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: Is it me, or are there a lot more wolves here than there used to be...?
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: Me and Richard are the only wolves that I know of......
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: My fellow Bob's Dinerians, I have not been entirely truthful with you... I did gigoogity that girl... I geshmoigetied her geflavity with my googus... And I am sorry...
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at the turkey* Huh? *thinks about it for a minute* ewww.....ucky!
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Shade Wolf], [Beo-Wulf], [Angelic nightmares], and [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]! ...darn wolves...
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: There are four wolves lurking here, and when I first came here, there was only one. *gets paranoid* // *blinkblink* What? // I hereby inform you watchers of B's D that I will be logging out of ET every time I leave the computer for the rest of the night, so as to prevent my drunk sister from getting on my account. Thank you, and please drive unsafely.
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: Oh yeah.....*feels slow*....I knew about them.....Just seeing if you did too
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Nelson laugh* ha ha! ...drunk...
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: STFU, biotch. *isn't drunk*
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: Okay! I did have an alcoholic beverage! >_<
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ah ha! I knew it! ...or did I...?
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: No you didn't. You're just mocking me. Don't make me mock you back, Mr. I-can't-remember-which-pain-reliever-I-took.
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: I remember! ...it was Tylenol... I think...
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: *points and laughs*
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist*
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: *pokes you*
2005-08-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *stands back and watches*
2005-08-20 [Beo-Wulf]: ...............................................
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: Popcorn? *offers the wolves some*
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... popcorn...
2005-08-20 [nokaredes]: *gifts you some*
2005-08-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats popcorn* ...ooo... it's even better than "poopcorn"!
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.izpitera.ru/lj/tetka.swf ...I could do this all day!
2005-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Hi y'al!
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hidey ho, ho!
2005-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: So, what was your condition yesterday? // WHAT?!
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: terrible! // you hizeard me...
2005-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Was it a virus? // You know you have a stupid life when you hear your parents say "homie," and "fo' shizzle".......
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: I dunno... viruses usually don't last... three days!!! // fo' shizzle, ma nizzle!
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and speaking of your homosexuality, Futurama's on now...
2005-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: What was that, serf?!
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Quiet, ye knave!
2005-08-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits in a corner and cries*
2005-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Knave, indeed! Higher than you, serf!
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ..."higher" you say... I knew it!!!
2005-08-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *sings along with [The Rocky Horror Picture Show]*
2005-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: AAAHH!!! MY EARS!!!
2005-08-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *wraps duck tape about the Turkeys beak* Take that "Sir" Turkey
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...That's Mr. "Sir" Turkey to you!
2005-08-22 [Angelic nightmares]: Aye Aye Cap'n Crunch!
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead* ...that's Mr. Cap'n Crunch!
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: how about Mr. kiss my ass? -walks in-
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: no... Mr. Kiss My Ass is over there! *points at piranha* *piranha waves*
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -shakes her head chuckling as she threw back her drink- no i was talking about you turkey
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...that's what you think...
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -throws a rock at him-
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *melts* ...What a world, what a world!
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laugh and shakes her head getting a mop and bucket-
2005-08-22 [nokaredes]: I would like to take this moment to beat you all with moldy spellbooks...however, I can't, as I left them all in Maryland. *swears* At least I only have 6 more days...*listens to the numanuma song*
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -glances at cardboard- wow you really don't have anything to do... -starts to rig turkey out from her mop then dumps in him a frying pan over a hot stove-
2005-08-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *[wolf form] sniffs the air* mmm, fried turkey
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs-
2005-08-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches white wolf still sniffing the air*
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: How many times must I tell you people this... the stove doesn't work and we don't have any cooking utensils... not to mention a mop...
2005-08-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: it's my mop my stove and my frying pan Turkey!!!
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hops a train to Maryland and steals the moldy spellbooks*
2005-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... suuuuuure it is... and that's Mr. Turkey!!! to you, young lady!
2005-08-22 [nokaredes]: *gasp* Don't steal them! I haven't copied all the spells to my computer yet!
2005-08-22 [nokaredes]: ...and since we're on the subject, that is the last time I eat something I summoned. ._. I'll stick to textbooks for now. >_>
2005-08-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over in Cardboards direction and grins bearing her teeth* Luuunch
2005-08-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp*
2005-08-23 [nokaredes]: *summons a textbook and beats [Angelic nightmares] with it*
2005-08-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *runs* OW!! *sneaks up behind cardboard and rips him/her to shreds with my teeth*
2005-08-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bigger gasp*
2005-08-23 [nokaredes]: him/her? O_o
2005-08-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *slight giggle*
2005-08-23 [nokaredes]: *The Look*
2005-08-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks back* I wasn't sure if you are a he or a she
2005-08-23 [Shade Wolf]: *trys not to laugh*
2005-08-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *cuddles up to you*
2005-08-23 [Shade Wolf]: *cuddles back*
2005-08-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *is out for the night* Be back some time tomorrow.....not really sure when tho.....
2005-08-23 [nokaredes]: I gave Dustin The Look...you are not worthy of The Look. ;P
2005-08-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites cardboard in the leg*
2005-08-23 [nokaredes]: *has no leg*
2005-08-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... socks with legs... *is afraid of The Look*
2005-08-23 [nokaredes]: Socks without legs. // Fear The Look! Muahaha!
2005-08-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes... even the chickens fear The Look...
2005-08-23 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello boss how are you?
2005-08-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Terrible! ...and you...?
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: You might be terrible, but at least you have paper...
2005-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...a hollow victory...
2005-08-24 [Shade Wolf]: LMFAO
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *feels special and whispers "cardborad has a missing leg"*
2005-08-24 [Shade Wolf]: *kisses you*
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *lightly kisses back* Cardboard is misssssing a lleeeeeeeeegg
2005-08-24 [Shade Wolf]: LOL
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *dances around on the bar*
2005-08-24 [Shade Wolf]: *dances with you*
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *grabs you by the hands and starts to slow dance with you*
2005-08-24 [Shade Wolf]: *puts one hand on your waist and holds your other hand and dances with you*
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: If, hypothetically, I, Cardboard Socks, had legs, I, being made of cardboard, could easily acquire a new leg.
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: True...... *rips of cardboards newest leg*
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes*
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *drops the leg and slowly nudges it back*
2005-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: yeeeaaah... riiiiight...
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *ish bored*
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: *picks it up* eew...it's really wet. >_>
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: I'm bored too. However, I am really energised. <_<
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: ...If I had paper, I would have a good 50 drawings before my sister comes home. My brother doesn't know where the paper is, so I have to wait for her. :( In the meantime, I am cleaning their house! (*cough*bribe*cough*)
2005-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: energized
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: It has an 's' the British way ;P
2005-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist at the Britans* ...I'm off to piano! *gets gun* ...time to settle this once and for all... j/k... or am I...? *gets gun just in case*
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: Britains ;P
2005-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sticks out tongue*
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: *is already doing that*
2005-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Piano!
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: O_o ...Violin!
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: ...I miss my violin. :( Two and a half days! :D
2005-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid socks.......
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: I gots a Violin too.....just it needs new strings....and I need to learn how to play.....
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: *ignores the penguin* My bow needed to be re-haired a while ago...
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites the penguin* oooo taste like chicken
2005-08-24 [Angelic nightmares]: How much does that usually cost? Or does it depend?
2005-08-24 [nokaredes]: I am bored. >_> I think we should torture him. // It cost me $30...but I suppose every place would have a different price, but $20-40 is about right. ^_^ The last time I did it, it was $25.
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: I remember my violin... oh wait... I never had a violin...
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: You don't know the phrase 'plot bunny'?
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...should I...?
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: ...probably.
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...o...k...
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ..."I have a small penis" it says...
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: ?
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh... right...
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: Your a turkey...of course your cock would be small
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: :O
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins and hides under a table before the turkey can find her*
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: Uh did I come back at the wrong time?
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: Turkey's in bed...but I am severely bored, and ready and willing to torture you for him...
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *tucks her tail between her legs and jumps in Richard's lap* SAVVVVVE me PWEASE?!?! *gives [Shade Wolf] the wolfie eyes*
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: No
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks confused* No what?
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: *eats popcorn* (hehe, that was a Dustin thing)
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: *hides Michelle and Pulls out a pair of scissors* (click click) No hurting Michelle
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: You were noing cardboard??
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: *pulls a sword* Meh, I'm bored with this already. *walks away*
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: Yep
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps from behind Richard* Hey! NO hurting my master!
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: ...I...didn't. O_o I would have been defending myself...if I had done anything...
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks at you suspicily (sp?)* Ok then....*puts her guard down and cuddles up to [Shade Wolf]*
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: *suspiciously. ^_^
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: I knew that......
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: *cuddles with my wolfie and makes a Richard & Michelle Collage*
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: Meh...you might have known that, but I had to use a dictionary ^^;
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: LMAO.Hi I'm Noah Webster.LOL
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: Actaully....i spelled it the best i could....
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *puts my hands on your shoulders* No your Richard Barker.....the love of my life...not Webster
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: *nodnod* I understand.
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *sniffs the air* I smell a bob.....no wait...thats the wall scum......
2005-08-25 [Shade Wolf]: lol
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: *feeds the wall scum a fish taco*
2005-08-25 [nokaredes]: 
2005-08-25 [Beo-Wulf]: Thats funny...Imao
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Shouldn't that be "Lmao"...? // and Socks... feel free to torture people for me!
2005-08-25 [Angelic nightmares]: *swallows hard and hides under a random table*
2005-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...ah yes... that reminds me... *shoots at random tables*
2005-08-26 [Angelic nightmares]: *runs and hides where you can't find me*
2005-08-26 [Angelic nightmares]: RICHARD!! look at Number 30 on the lunch Menyou!
2005-08-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: huh? have i missed something turkey?
2005-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Apparently so...
2005-08-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: so it seems. inlighten me please
2005-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nah... enlighten yourself!
2005-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats some Bert & Ernies Every Flavor Spleens* ...ooo... a spleen flavored one!
2005-08-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol ok
2005-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight...
2005-08-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol so whats been going on here *pulls a unicorn from his pants*
2005-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*... *pulls two unicorns from his pants*
2005-08-26 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol hey thats not nice. :D
2005-08-27 [Shade Wolf]: I will prostitute myself!
2005-08-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps on richard and hugs him tightly* Nope! That's my job baby
2005-08-27 [Shade Wolf]: Wha...wha...what?
2005-08-27 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm pimping you out...but your to expensive....so I guess you'll have to deal with me......*wink wink*
2005-08-27 [Shade Wolf]: *bends you over and spanks you*
2005-08-27 [Angelic nightmares]: oh wow.....
2005-08-27 [Shade Wolf]: LOL
2005-08-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats popcorn*
2005-08-27 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay boss whats with the name change???
2005-08-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hay slave whats with the no name change???
2005-08-27 [Angelic nightmares]: *goes to say something but decides against it* What the hell...Josh the fight with May finally ended....
2005-08-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... 'bout time...
2005-08-28 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: I got a new keyboard *shows it off to the others*
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *looks at it* ...I've seen better...
2005-08-28 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: ;P lol thanx dustin
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...you're quite welcome!
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: The fight is over [Angelic nightmares]............
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yay! Hooray! ...what fight...?
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Thats what I am trying to figure out............
2005-08-28 [nokaredes]: My mom cleaned out my room! T_T And Dustin...two unicorns? Are you compensating for something? >_>
2005-08-28 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: im sorry allie, i found ur cd
2005-08-28 [nokaredes]: I'm getting an MP3 soon, I don't need it anymore ;P
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...What?!
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello.....Whats up All ?
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Hello.....Whats up All?
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Rickety ceilings! ...*the ceilings crumble and fall on you*...
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Damnit Turkey....I thought you said that you was going to get this diner fixed.....LoL
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I recall not, that of which you speak...
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Well....We should get this diner...Back in good shape.....
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...but... we can't get it back, if it was never in good shape to start with!
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: Look.....I understand that....But all we can do it just try
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: HA HA HAA!!! ...oh... are you serious...? ...HA HA HAA!!!
2005-08-28 [AbLam]: Um...hello. I am here, [Sagacious Turkey].
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Really?! ...*the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets*
2005-08-28 [AbLam]: *Takes out Uzi machine gun and blasts the chickens* TAKE THAT, EVIL ONES!
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *...more chickens keep coming from the clone-o-matic*
2005-08-28 [AbLam]: *Screams* and runs from the diner, uzi in hand.
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pride of lions chase you*
2005-08-28 [AbLam]: *Holds open mouth and devours lions*. Haha! Peut-etre tu as les lions, mais moi, j'ai un bouche qui mange TOUT! MWAHAHHA!
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...actually, the lions are [Mortified Penguin]'s! *more lions come out of the clone-o-matic's clones*
2005-08-28 [AbLam]: O-kay....this is getting tedious, oddly enough!
2005-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-08-28 [Beo-Wulf]: oookkk.....Weird.......
2005-08-28 [AbLam]: Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking, yo!
2005-08-29 [Beo-Wulf]: Really?....LoL....Did you know that I am a Waiter here?
2005-08-29 [AbLam]: Nope.
2005-08-29 [Beo-Wulf]: Yep I am
2005-08-29 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *I came in to find a set by the bar* Really looking around *look at [Beo-Wulf] see how cutie*...........
2005-08-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks nose* ...uh huh...
2005-08-29 [Beo-Wulf]: Turkey she is my fiance 
2005-08-29 [Beo-Wulf]: May I take your order [AbLam]?
2005-08-29 [Angelic nightmares]: *waks in after a long weekend* Ello guys! Wow. seems like I missed alot over 2 days. *goes to the back and comes put drinking a goblet of blood*
2005-08-29 [Beo-Wulf]: Well look at the time...*Goes on break*...*Smokes a cigg*...
2005-08-29 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over in josh's direction*......you leaving just because I came in??
2005-08-29 [Beo-Wulf]: nope...It break time for me...*Smokes another cigg*.....
2005-08-29 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks over to you* I wasn't even planning on starting anything with you. I do work here too. And I would like to be able to work here with you, and there not be any problems.....
2005-08-29 [AbLam]: I would like....to GET OUT OF HERE!
2005-08-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...don't make me fire you two! ...*ties [AbLam] down*... no one can leave!
2005-08-29 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: huh? o.O wtf is goin on?
2005-08-29 [nokaredes]: If you don't know, then I'm not going to tell you. ;P
2005-08-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead*
2005-08-29 [nokaredes]: ...I wouldn't suggest hitting yourself in my presence...
2005-08-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... *puches himself*
2005-08-29 [nokaredes]: hmm...I think you are lucky that I don't know what 'puches' is/are...
2005-08-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *mutters* ...stupid keyboard... stupid buttons... stupid... letters!
2005-08-29 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lol
2005-08-30 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Saw what was going and *Follow [Beo-Wulf] * to see where he was going!
2005-08-30 [nokaredes]: *bored*
2005-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gives you Pacman*
2005-08-30 [nokaredes]: Pacman! :D
2005-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...enjoy! ...sorry... Mrs. Pacman was... *snifflesniffle*... eaten... *sobsob*
2005-08-30 [nokaredes]: Pfft. I'm gonna read Harry Potter now...since all of my friends need this pathetic thing called 'sleep'! *makes a rude gesture* Except Logic Boy (Jake), but I can't go to his house until my mom is asleep...which would require her to be home first...to the cookies!
2005-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chokes on popcorn* WH- WHAT?!
2005-08-30 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: im still awake
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Im sorry Turkey...Please dont fire me....*Gets back to work*
2005-08-30 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: I had come *Behind [Beo-Wulf] give him a hug* Had gone back t o the bar!
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches [Beo-Wulf] for a minute or two* I...*sighs* never mind....*goes back to cleaning tables*
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: [Angelic nightmares]....What was you going to say?....You can send it to in a ETM.....instead on here...............Please tell me.........
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: You don't have me blocked?
2005-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha! It's my brother's birthday today! .......and it was during a hurricane, no less....
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: you are not blocked.....Please tell me what you was going to say in a ETM please
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks down at the ground and kicks a loose floor board* .......k......
2005-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiight........ you guys never really were part of Bob's, were you?
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: ummm....Yea we are....We work here...Look at the Staff...WAITOR: [Beo-Wulf]...WAITRESS: [Angelic nightmares]
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up at Josh* I sent the message. And yesh Penguin we do work here......
2005-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, but over the months you only messaged this wiki because you had nothing else to do..... except for right now, you're starting to message more and more; I remember the days evreybody used to order a pint of blood.....
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: *stops what she is doing* It was more like a goblet of blood, but I know what you mean.......those were the days.....*gets lost in thought* But times and things have changed.....*goes back to cleaning tables*
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: The past is just that.....the past....and all we can do is learn from it.....nothing we can do to change it......*throws a few plates at the wall scum*
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay [Angelic nightmares]....Sit at my table....Can we talk?
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: I guess so *throws her wash rag down and sits across from [Beo-Wulf]*
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: We need to stop doing this....What I mean is...We are friends...So want to hang out sometime?
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: Doing what? Fighting?
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Yea.....
2005-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *tells the wall scum everything will be alright* ...........*sits behind the cash register*.........*gets bored and gos to the manager's room..*........
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: If the wall scum would guit spiting bones on my clean table I woulnt have threw plates at it. [Beo-Wulf] if you want us to stay friends, then you 've got to keep your promises....
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes I know that....
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: You dont have to get that Nirvana thing if you dont want to, I can just scrap up the money some how and get it.....or if you wanted to get it you still can....either way, it dont relaly matter......
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: I will still get it for you....I just hope that I get my Soc. Sec. Next month on the 3rd
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: They didn't give you this months?
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm sorry.....*puts her face in her hands* I forgot this was still August.....
2005-08-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Its alright....This month is going really slow....
2005-08-30 [Angelic nightmares]: Yesh it is.....
2005-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: heeey... no throwing plates at the wall scum! *pats the scum* *it growls* *throws a plate at it* ...do as I say do, not as I do... and Mort... get out of my room!
2005-08-30 [nokaredes]: *feeds the wall scum pop tarts*
2005-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *it devours them*
2005-08-30 [nokaredes]: *thought that part was obvious* *feeds it more*
2005-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *it vomits on you*
2005-08-31 [Angelic nightmares]: *picks up her dish rag and cleans off cardboards face*
2005-08-31 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Me run out of the Diner and *Have Tears run dowm eyes* Never want to be any where see the Friedn ship that with never had happen!...................................
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *lassos you with an extension cord* Biotch! What did I say about nobody leaving the diner?!
2005-08-31 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: IT not you Turkey ok
2005-08-31 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: ITs jsut lil upset here
2005-08-31 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *Seat Outside* Just think about every thing
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... learn some English and we'll talk...
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: The manager's room is mine, stupid! *kicks the wall scum and tells it evrything will be alright*...
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...blasphemer!
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...plebian!
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Speak for yourself, helot!
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: You dissin' me, serf?!
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: It would appear so, villein!
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Villain?! Where?! Darn usurper!
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Liar! ...if anything you'd be the usurper... *mutters something about "my manager's room"*... supplanter...
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I was the founder of Bob's Diner, mind you! And that's my manager's room...... you're the assistant manager, peasant! ....."middle-class" my butt.......
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: It never would have come into existence if it wasn't for me! ...and it would have soon thereafter died if it wasn't for me... bucolic...
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: No, the wiki would have come into existence, not the name......CHANGE THE NAME!!!!!! I'm about to get all the rights for Bob's Diner reserved.......destitute peasant!
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha! ...you can't, fool...
2005-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I can...... I just won't get the things named bob's diner before I came up with Bob's Diner, idiot! If it's popsicle, it's possible! (and it's most deffinetively popsicle.....)
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: We'll see... oh yes... we'll see... *eats a popsicle*
2005-08-31 [nokaredes]: *feels like she missed something*
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nah... just the usual chatter...
2005-08-31 [Beo-Wulf]: Turkey.....Do you have a problum with what way [xXTwilightXRose Xx] Talks???.....If so take it up with me.................
2005-08-31 [nokaredes]: ...What is this 'problum' you speak of?
2005-08-31 [Beo-Wulf]: This is between just me and Turkey only......
2005-08-31 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *Look Over and Just see what to drink*
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight... your life is expendable!
2005-08-31 [nokaredes]: I can still make fun of you, even if you're trying to pick a fight with Turkey...
2005-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh huh...
2005-08-31 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over at the wall scum and feeds it pizza* There ya go. [Beo-Wulf]? What's wrong with Emily?
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: I honestly dont know..................*Feels as tho I fucked up*
2005-09-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over in [Beo-Wulf]s direction* Does she have a problem with us being friends???
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: No..............*Walks Away*
2005-09-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *chases after you and ofers you a [goblet of blood on the rocks]* Josh, we're supposed to be freinds, please dont walk away. And talk to me. I won't get mad!!
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: ...........................
2005-09-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits down next to you and puts my arm on your back* Please....I don't want to loose your friendship again.....
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: Well.........I have to get back to work............
2005-09-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *gets up off the ground taking the goblet with her, and goes and starts to clean off tables*
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: *Goes On Break*.................*Smokes a cigar*
2005-09-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -Walks in and sits at the bar-
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: *Walks back into the Diner*....Can I get you something White Wolf?
2005-09-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -smiles- anything with blood -lays a 20 on the counter-
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: Gives you a [Goblet Of Blood On The Rocks] And hands you $17.50 back....Enjoy....Will that be all?
2005-09-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -nods and smirks- unless you have someone back there that you don't like any more... -raven sees her fangs-
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: well hmmm.....Not that the moment.....Sorry
2005-09-01 [Beo-Wulf]: Well I got to get going.....*Clocks out*....I'll be back later tonight....Take care Y'all's
2005-09-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -waves and starts to sip her drink-
2005-09-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in completely nude*
2005-09-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -covers her eyes and throws a rock ment for his head but hits him between the legs insted-
2005-09-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats the rock*
2005-09-01 [nokaredes]: Something's wrong with Emily?!
2005-09-01 [Angelic nightmares]: *hits the floor laughing at turkey*
2005-09-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist*
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -starts laughing as well and turns away form him- wow you're just all kinds of wrong
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: I'm just fine as it is here
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: I don't think there none wrong withme here
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *look Over to [Beo-Wulf]* woud like some A Quart of Blood $10.00
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: i'll have the same if ya don't mind -she hands raven what was left of her change from the 20
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *look over at [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]* nice to meet you ..... *As seat down by the bar*
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- just call me white it's easier on the hands
2005-09-02 [nokaredes]: I have money...but I am saving it for a computer part. *is not a geek* I will get my blood from somewhere free-er. ^^;
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Cool Called me Cutie for short
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -nods- will do
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Can I Please get side some like cooked sushi $20.00 Please with that!
2005-09-02 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes you may....*Hands you a plate of Cooked Sushi*....That will be $4.50 please....Out of $20.00...Alright let me get your change.......*Hand's you $15.50 back*
2005-09-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *moves her hair off her neck* Here ya go cardboard all the fresh blood you want....*goes back to cleaning tables*
2005-09-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Thank you *[Beo-Wulf]* Take the the money back *mmmm yummy really good*.........*Looking over and watch [Beo-Wulf]working there*
2005-09-02 [Angelic nightmares]: *takes the tray of dises and carries it to the back of the diner and dumps them in the dishwasher*
2005-09-02 [nokaredes]: mmm...bloody goodness. :d
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sips at her own drink and smiles closing her eyes-
2005-09-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *slaps [Angelic nightmares]* ...no giving away free blood...
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -slaps him back- meany!!!
2005-09-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *opens fire on your with a gun*
2005-09-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -ducks behind the bar-
2005-09-03 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *behind the bar too!*
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a grenade*
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *gasp* I don't get free blood?
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure you do! ...from me... no one else can give you free blood, though... *mutters at other people* *gives you a gallon of blood*
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *accuses you of being jealous*
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh... er... look! A monkey! *points and runs*
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: ._.
2005-09-03 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: Men suck, I wish I could kill them all
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...a-hem!
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *seconds that*
2005-09-03 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: not you dustin
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: ...But you just said, and I quote, 'Men suck, I wish I could kill them all'
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah...
2005-09-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: well so i do i sometimes! -gets out from behind the bar and takes a gallon of blood from turkey- cause most of them that i know are complete asses!
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *snaps fingers* *the gang of chickens attack you*
2005-09-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -bashes the chickens in the head with a chair-
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *more come out of the clone-o-matic*
2005-09-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grabs a new chair and goes back to hitting them over the head-
2005-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *cough cough*
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hurls a cough drop at Mort's head*
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *gives Mortimer a bag of cough drops*
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...interesting...
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: Cheater! :O
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: wh- what?!
2005-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: g2g...... six flags......
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: David's not going, is "he"...?
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: I have an unlabled bag of 'mints' that make people fart...
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Where'd you get 'em...?
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: Bonanza.
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! Bonanza's on TV right now!
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: ...okay...
2005-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Where's that turkey boy?
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: ...and we would know this, how? >_>
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...that turkey boy was swimming, mind you...
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *cough* I mean, he's swimming! Why do you ask?
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *grins*
2005-09-03 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: lol
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: How dare you all (except [nokaredes]) forget that this diner's birthday was the 30th?! I should beat you all with bamboo canes...
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: I don't know how you expected me to remember that...
2005-09-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...fine... *edits comment*...
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: *giggles* I wasn't expecting you to be such a pushover. ^^;
2005-09-03 [nokaredes]: Shouldn't you change that comment up top about [Gosu]...? Since he/she/it is banned now...?
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: Allie, Allie, Allie... If I change that, then I'll feel obligated to change all the stupid unnecessary comments, several food items regarding my mother, the specials picture, and most of all that darned lymerick by Chavez...
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist at Mort* ...he's lucky I was too lazy to take that off...
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: ...Did you just say my name three times in a patronising way?
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh... er... no...?
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I was talking to the other Allie! *points at the other Allie* *she waves*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Other Allie?! *gasp* Parallel universe! *jumps out the nearest window*
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *leaps out after you*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: *can fly*
2005-09-04 [ally]: I never saw that comment before.. *feels very unwelcome*
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh well... it was only on the first floor...
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Eep! [ally]-stalker! :O
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Where?!
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh... right...
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and speaking of "lymericks"... http://www.cafepress.com/cp/sotd.aspx?storeid=getfuzzy&date=09/02/2005
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: We were speaking of lymericks? O_o
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: I was...
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: ...*agrees*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Do you refer to yourself in the 3rd person a lot?
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: "Yes," says the turkey.
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: I haven't noticed before today. I'm losing my touch! T_T
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: You... you can't touch anymore?!
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: *gives you The Look* I know you know what expression I was using in that sentence.
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cowers from The Look*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: You'd better. *is threatening*
2005-09-04 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.o; you guys
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: "Guys"?! You're calling her a guy?!
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: x_x ......oh wow.....Special.....I think....anyways......I don;t know......
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pack of meteors burst in* "World domination!!!" ...(only [spitfire_35121] and maybe [Mortified Penguin] would get that)...
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *points to above comment* Like I said.....special
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits alone in a corner and changes into her wolf form and howls*
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points at the "No Howling" sign on the door*
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *rips the sign off the door and shreds it*
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points at the sign on the wall, "No Ripping Off Signs!"* ...*points at the fine print, "All violators will be prosecuted to the full extent of my imagination!"*...
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *ish not afraid*
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... *thinks*... you'll be forced to... read Barry Cotter and the Sorcerer's Bone!
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *waits for the scream of terror*
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Why would I read that?
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the Bob's Diner Police Department burst in and tackle you* "Swarm, swarm!!!"
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites their nuts and boobs off*
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha! ...the BDPD are genderless golems!
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Ewww....but besides that...wh would Barry need to know where the gizzard is located???
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs* ...[Mortified Penguin] made that part... and there's still a lot I've yet to type...
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: ...Can we stop talking about this? I get enough of it in health...
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh...
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: OMFG!!!
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *looking for [Beo-Wulf]*........ Set down need another of A Quart of Blood Please here...... 
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: Raven has flown away.LOL
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: What the fuck..........
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: I don't appreciate you yelling at Michelle in the Vampire's guild for being confused.Don't cuss at me either.
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: I was yelling at you..........Anyways.........Well...............Hmm...........Oh yea.................FUCK YOU.......................
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *Walk over Give [Beo-Wulf] hug*
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: So anyways...*drinks a blended mudslide*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: I see seriousness...at B's D...*goes into convulsions*
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: .........................................................
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: ..................................
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: *hugs Cardboard Socks*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Ack! *wonders if the chickens would follow her commands*
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over in joshs direction and slides Emily the drink of her choosing* Josh don't yell at Richard!
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Yes...no yelling...only screams of terror are allowed...
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *screams* I feel better *falls to the floor laughing*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: *pounces* DOGPILE!!!
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: *pulls Michelle out of the dogpile*
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *quickly changes into her wolf form and playfully bites Cardboard on the neck*
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: I had take my Drink and then Just Think about some thing in life of me here!
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: What are you talking about Emily?
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps on Richard knocking him over*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Oh, come on...no one wants to dogpile? :(
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *jumps on Cardboard* WOLFIE PILE!!!!
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: *joins in*
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *Got up Leave the Room*...............*crying in tears*................
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks over at Emily* YOu OK!?!?! *lightly bites richards neck*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: No crying! >_<
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: What is her problem???
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *shrugs her shoulders*
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: *kisses*
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *kisses back*
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: *Gets up and leaves*..........*I dont think I will be coming back*.............Bye
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: *holds you*
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Fine....quit working here! *takes Josh off the staff list and added Richard in his place* Babys, your the new Waitor
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Follow with [Beo-Wulf] ........... *Leave with him* ............. bye
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: FUCK OFF Y'ALLS............Come on [xXTwilightXRose Xx]....Lets go..................
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: Ok
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *rolls her eyes and howls at the moon*
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *Follow you out the Door*................... Really to many Loser in this Place................*Smile Face to [Beo-Wulf]..........
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Riiiight. Thats when the loooooosers are leaving
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: The biggest two just left...
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: >_>
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: What Ever *SULT* Out the door!
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *punches Emily in the nose* DON'T F*CKING CALL ME A SLUT!!!!!!!
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: If Michelle is a slut what does that make you Emily?!?
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: ...Do I need to remove the comments? I can do that! >:O
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh you want to talk about losers?.....Who graduated?....Hmmmm....ME......Who stayed in school......Lets see......ME.......Who has a job............ME..............You are the loser......................
2005-09-04 [Shade Wolf]: Are you refering to me because I did too.
2005-09-04 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: lol..........Fall on to the floor....
2005-09-04 [Beo-Wulf]: No I was refering to Michelle
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: *the Chickens burst in and drag the lot of you into the streets*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Huh. I wasn't expecting that to work. *feeds Jolly Ranchers to the floor gremlins (so they don't get jealous)*
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Whee! I get to talk to myself again!
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Especially because I have nothing to do on ET, and am actually resorting to clicking the pink links...
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: We have 51 watchers!
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: Is that a reindeer by the cacti?
2005-09-04 [nokaredes]: "I don't want the talking magic sword... I have enough voices in my head already." LMAO
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *glares at Josh* I HAD NO OTHER F*UCKING CHOICE BUT TO DROP OUT!!!!! I DIDN'T HAVE ENUF FUCKING CREDITS!!!!!!!
2005-09-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -blinks- damn...i thought i had a fowl mouth... -she sits at the bar
2005-09-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *changes into her wolf form and walks around trying to calm her self down*
2005-09-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -hands her a large scrap of meat- here
2005-09-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pimp slaps all the wolves except [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]* Bastards! Stop doing that stuff which you are doing and whatnot! ...*beats [Beo-Wulf] and [xXTwilightXRose Xx] with a skillet* ...and no one is leaving! AND WHAT DO YOU MEAN TOO MANY LOSERS IN HERE?! *gets gun* ...and yes, that's a reindeer by the cacti... *pats the reindeer* *it poos on my shoe* *whacks it's face with a cactus*
2005-09-05 [Angelic nightmares]: *picks at the meat* Thanks....Let them leave Turkey....obviously there too "good" for this place...sides we dont need them hanging around here anyways....
2005-09-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: sure we do... they make a lot of comments...
2005-09-05 [Angelic nightmares]: They try and start fights.....
2005-09-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's what the chickens are for, silly!
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: 'fowl mouth'...? haha.
2005-09-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: ...Should I be an English major?
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: Emily just said no, my English isn't good enough. >_<
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: But she's here in person for a change, so I can do this!: *clobbers Emily*
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: ...helloooooo?
2005-09-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hi! *waves*
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: Hi...
2005-09-05 [nokaredes]: I'm here in person! Whee! ...also, I am not on the computer. *duck tapes your mouth*
2005-09-05 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Not Listen you all Leave this Place Not Come back Ever Here So Stopp Being Loser F*ck Good BYE!!!!!!!
2005-09-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *slaps you* Biotch!
2005-09-06 [Angelic nightmares]: *falls to the floor laughing spilling her apple cider* She says that she's leavvving but she keeps coming back....I ISH HYPER!!!!
2005-09-06 [Shade Wolf]: ROFLMAO
2005-09-06 [Angelic nightmares]: oooo shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake, shake your booty, shake your boody!
2005-09-06 [Shade Wolf]: *tickles Michelle*
2005-09-06 [Angelic nightmares]: *tickles back and then tackles you to the ground*
2005-09-06 [Shade Wolf]: *LAUGHING HARD*
2005-09-06 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs evily* ha ha ha ha ha! I love you baby!
2005-09-06 [Shade Wolf]: I love you too
2005-09-06 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: Wow.....*looks around* Nice place ya'lls got here. Anyway, I'm new to Elftown. You guys mind if I hang out here?
2005-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whispers to himself* ...yes... another sucker... er... I mean... Welcome to Bob's Diner! ...time for the "initiation test"... *the gang of chickens burst in through the window and drag [Agent Blood-Rayne] into the streets... and while they're at it, they pledge allegiance to [nokaredes]*
2005-09-06 [nokaredes]: Whaa...? I am not the flag!
2005-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: So I see... WOO!!! COMMENT 10000!!!
2005-09-06 [nokaredes]: You can see me in my English class...? >_>
2005-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yup... *waves through the window*
2005-09-06 [nokaredes]: I am on the 3rd floor. O_o
2005-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points at ladder*
2005-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...new items! (Lunch: #45/ Drinks: #17)
2005-09-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Now... enjoy them! ...*shakes fist*... enjoy them...
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: ...Am I supposed to be saying when I add things to the menu? >_>
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Why was coffee taken off the menu?
2005-09-07 [Angelic nightmares]: Josh must have removed it. I'll put it back up.....
2005-09-07 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: *beats up the chickens*
2005-09-07 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* Don't worry Rayne, he sends the chickens after everyone *shoots the chickens before they can attack*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pride of lions burst in and drag [Angelic nightmares] into the streets*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: The chickens haven't attacked me for a while...
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Because they gave you their allegiance!
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: ...how about they pledge me half-allegiance? When you're here, they get to attack me, but when you're not, I get to use them as crowd control! ^_^
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs* *they drag you into the streets*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Yay!
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Besides...if they pledged their allegiance to me...then I could have them drag you into the streets...and you probably wouldn't like that...
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: They wouldn't do that... *glares at chickens* *they look away nervously*... everyone knows that turkeys dominate chickens!
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: ah-HA! You are a dominatrix!
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp*...nuh uh! *mumbles*... as far as you know...
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: I obviously do know about your secret male dominatrix life...
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whistles innocently* ...you can't prove anything!
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Can too! *pulls out pictures from an envelope*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... I knew I shouldn't have mailed you that envelope...
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: >_>
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: *gets the cattleprod*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *large gasp* *coughs*... *also gets out cattleprod*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: *gets a bigger cattleprod*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: You still have your skill, but your power fades. Prepare to meet the force, [nokaredes]... *gets another cattleprod* *twirls both cattleprods*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: O_O *prods you while you're busy showing off*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *collapses*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: *cheers*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *crawls towards your feet inconspicuously*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *chomps your big toe*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: *kicks you in the head*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dies from severe brain trauma*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Oh, come on...
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Shame... you murderer... *points at the guy that was fighting with you that was not me in any way*
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Ack! Parallel universe! *jumps out the nearest window*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Not again! *jumps out the window* *hits the ground*... Darn half-story window...
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: Why isn't B's D taller?
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: And why isn't there indoor plumbing...? And why does no one care for Bob...? And why is there a gang of FREAKIN' CHICKENS THAT DRAG RANDOM PEOPLE INTO THE STREETS?! ...*ahem*... the world may never know...
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: ......
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... right...
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: No you're not. >_>
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yuh huh!
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: If you say so.
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: I wonder where I'd be if I had decided to be called The Bad Chicken... *scratches chin and wonders*
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: "*the gang of turkeys burst in and drag [Mortified Penguin] into the streets*"
2005-09-07 [nokaredes]: O_o He's not even here!
2005-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: So...? ...he's on layaway...
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: You can do that?
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: You can put people on layaway??? *throws the lions raw meat* *they eat it, and purr, and then love me and obey my every word*
2005-09-08 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: Whoa....think I misssed a bit.....
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think not... the lions follow Mort's every word...
2005-09-08 [Shade Wolf]: Hello
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: Hi!
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: I fed them meat! THEY LOVE ME!!!!
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Sides......when Mort's not here, they cna listen to me!
2005-09-08 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: Ah ha......okie-tay.....*raises her eyebrows* hmmm....lions? Chickens? Some unknown species by the name Mort? Huh......I think I've found my most favorites wiki.....
2005-09-08 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: MIdnite Wolf? I'll give you $3.75 for Shade Wolf's manhood!
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks* hmmm.....$3.75? The homeless guy in the bathroom was offering a free meal, and a toe......*cuddles up to her kitty*
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: "Some unknown species by the name Mort" is [Mortified Penguin]. Us sophisticated people call him "Mortimer". ;P
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: I'll chip in $5 and some Nestle...
2005-09-08 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: Wow....so now its up to $8.75 and some Nestle.....what do you say Midnite???
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: You guys siriusly want to buy Shade's Manhood???
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: ...Why wouldn't we?
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Just wondering......$8.75 and some nestle? Ya'lls siriusly want it???
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: Yes, we seriously want it.
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins and shakes her head* Fine....$8.75 and some nestle for Shade Wolf's manhood.....ya'lls get it for 12 hours!
2005-09-08 [nokaredes]: Yay!
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: I was going to offer $8.75¾ and 1 less beating than usual, but noooo...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks* Thats a better over....*takes the $8.753/4 and the 1 less beating than usual* You can have it as soon as their done with it!
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Until then... *beats you*
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Hey! *beats you back*
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! You can't do that!
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Says who?
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: says... the chickens! *the chickens burst in and drag you into the streets*
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *kicks the chickens in the head and calls the lions to attack the chickens*
2005-09-08 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: Woot Woot! I GET SHADE WOLF'S MANHOOD!!!!! AND no I don't mind sharing it either....
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tells the lions to attack you* *they attack you*
2005-09-08 [Agent Blood-Rayne]: I'm gonna kill Mallory......She's better hope to god that I can't find a way out to Cali.....cause once I get my hands on her....she's in sirius f*cking trouble!!!
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiight...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Hey! Fine keep the lions. I'll bring in my own gang of animals *brings in a pack of wolves* Ha ha! This wolf pack listens to me and me only!!!! MY WOLF PACK!!!!! *runs away with the wolves and hides in the back room*
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...that "back room" is the slaughter house...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks around* Nope.....not this one. This room's safe!
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's what they want you to believe...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Nope it's safe.....
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *puches a hole in a puching bag with a picture of [Death's Die-Ary]'s face glued on it*
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Who's that, pray tell...?
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *leaves the back room her wolf pack following closely behind* Richards fucking girlfriend........*pulls up a seat at the bar and sits down* He says that he wants to be with me, and that he loves me, and that we belong together.....yet doesn't seem to be making any effort to breaking up with her....so i'm pushed to the side, with her making my damned life a living hell....and him says that he loves me, and wants to be with me....yet like i said...doens't seem to be making any effort to making it happen.....*puts her face in her hands and starts to cry* i fucking hate life....i just want to die!
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: That can be arranged...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up at the Turkey and wipes away her tears* I mean in real life.....
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...exactly... *goes to ask [Death's Die-Ary] to join Bob's Diner*
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Wow.....
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: [Mallory.....if your gonna join Bob's Diner, please ignore my above comments, I wrote them when we were still fighting].....She gonna join?
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...only time will tell...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: What did she say tho?
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: PEOPLE OF BOB'S DINER! PLEASE TAKE MY POLL! ITS VERY IMPORTANT AND NEEDS AN HONEST ANSWER!!!!!!! 
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Taken! ;)
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: She said taken? Or is that what you said? Take my poll please......I need to know something, and that poll holds the answer.....
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Taken... as in your poll... it's not you I'd miss... it's the comments!
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: You'd miss my comments???
2005-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Not the words in the comments, just the comments... to help with the average number of comments...
2005-09-08 [Angelic nightmares]: Ah......so you wouldn't miss me at all?
2005-09-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure I would! ...there'd be one less member... we can't have that, can we...?
2005-09-09 [nokaredes]: My Lemon Fund
2005-09-09 [Angelic nightmares]: I guess your right on that part.....I wish I knew what to do tho......
2005-09-09 [nokaredes]: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/sermons/alabama.html
2005-09-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *twitchtwitch*
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: ...Don't you just hate that website?
2005-09-10 [ally]: http://www.landoverbaptist.org/sermons/hardwick.jpg O_o is that his real head?
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: ...as opposed to the fake one he keeps around for photo shoots?
2005-09-10 [ally]: No it's just that ... it's so big... compared to his face ....
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: He could just be weird looking...why do you think they'd make him look like that on purpose?
2005-09-10 [ally]: I didn't I was just pointing out how abnormally large his head is :P
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: Oh...well...I agree! XD
2005-09-10 [ally]: XD
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I... concure...? *chews gum* *breath is now squeaky clean!* ...hmm... how can my breath be squeaky...?
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: uhm...did you eat the pronoun in my basement?
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: I would add that to the menu...but I don't know if 'It' wants to be on the menu...
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah... good ol' pronouns... me and David were "talking" about pronouns in the book/note!
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: ...okay...
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: *is going to strangle you in a minute if you don't stop with the noncommittal comments*
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Heeey... noncomitical isn't a word!
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: I just made it a word. Get over it.
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets over it* *the word's unstable* *falls to the ground*
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: The word is not unstable. x_x
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: And yet... I still fell...
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: *sighs* Fine. I will go look up the word I meant, and either find it and edit my comment or start yelling at you in some language I actually feel comfortable in. ;P BRB!
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...noncommittal?
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: ...I may yell at you anyway. *mutters* kindi leulan...unstable...*glares*
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: Ha! I got it first!
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sobsob*
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: Are you crying because you didn't win, or because you regret calling me unstable?
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I never called you unstable! ...just your word...
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: ...Is there a difference?
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh huh...
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: What is it?
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: A couple of letters, silly!
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: http://www.jokery.com/photos/pics/24.jpg
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... link... *clicks*
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...heeey... I saw that picture 4 years ago!
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: I haven't been on the Internet as long as you have...
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: There was a bagpiper at school yesterday...he was just in the courtyard, bagpiping. >_>
2005-09-10 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in crying* I think i've lost Richard....*sits at the bar*
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Poor bagpiper...
2005-09-10 [nokaredes]: Poor? Why?
2005-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: You're not allowed to say it if you don't know why...otherwise the world would be chaos! :O Do you want the world to be chaos?
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... maybe...
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: *changes the subject* The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy comes out on DVD Tuesday! *glee*
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *puts her head on the bar and closes her eyes* I've lost him....or at least that's how I feel.....I told him I'd wait forever, he thinks I'm mad at him......Mallorys trying to start shit between us.......God what am I supposed to do??????????
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's terrible! ...he still plans to be a member of Bob's Diner, right...?
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* I don't even know anymore. I can't get him to talk to me.....*crys harder*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Everyone I know named 'Melanie' is someone I don't like. >_>
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! Me too! ...even though I only know one Melanie...
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *puts her head back down and sighs*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: 'Mallory' too. <_< IT'S PEOPLE WITH 'M' NAMES! *starts running around in circles*
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches as tears hit the bar* My real name starts with an 'M' that mean you don't like me either? *smiles slighty at what you said about Mallory*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn you! Can't you read?! *points at the sign, "No crying on the bar!"*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: I thought your name was 'Ron, Ginger, Ging, and Gingy'. ._.
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *spits on the sign* I don't care anymore.....Richard seems to hate me.....and nothing else matters anymore.....nothing does
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: :O Lotsa stuff matters!
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *points at the other sign, "Don't spit at the signs!"* *shakes fist*... besides... if he doesn't care enough to be with you now, he wouldn't care enough to stay with you even if you were together...
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: We're not together tho.....He's with Mallory....
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: No....just nick-names
2005-09-11 [weasel2]: ha ive been here for some time now wheres my wroms at
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...even if... EVEN IF!!!
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: *proceeds to curse her computer with the zeal of a drunken sailor*
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: Mallory says that he's playing with my emotions....he says he aint......I honestly don;t know who to believe anymore.....
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... sexy...
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: O.o
2005-09-11 [weasel2]: hehehe
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: He was talking to me. I think. >_> // I'd go with...he is. But that's just one person's opinion. *gasp* You should make a poll!
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes, I was talking to you! *smacks head*
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: I know he was talking to you. I made the face because of you cusing at your computer like a drunked sailor
2005-09-11 [weasel2]: helps t smack his head
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *chuckles sightly*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Oh, that. *continues in several non-English languages* It's acting up.
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: You could always sell it to the circus!
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: I could...but have you ever seen a power outlet in a tent?
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: well... there was that freaky outlet carnie that time...
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: *gives you a suspicious look*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *waves*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: *glomps you*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...AAAH!!!
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: What?! O_O
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: er... I mean... *glomps back*...?
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Don't even try it, mister.
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *trys it*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: *whacks you with her math textbook*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...another reason to hate math!
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: lol
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *watches Escaflowne* ...worst... movie... EVER!
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: :O
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *confused, hurt and slowly dying on the inside*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: hmm... dying on the inside... *gets out doctors' tools* ...surgery time!
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *moves out of Turkey;s way* I mean, my hearts breaking, and I'm slowly closing up.....
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Sounds like a job for duck tape if I ever heard one.
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: sooo... your heart's breaking...? *gets glue*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: HA!
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sticks out tongue*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: *does too*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes your tongue*
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Pervert!
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: Glue can't help......Richard can fix it....he knows how......just matters if he's going to or not......
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Well duct tape can fix anything.
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHAT?! ...you can't prove anything! // Shouldn't you maybe do something about it, instead of complaining on a two-bit wiki with useless losers (except [nokaredes]!)?
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: I doubt it can fix this......
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh yeah...? Well I don't see duct tape feeding the mouths of little kindergarteners! ...unlike glue...
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: What do you expect me to do Turkey? Kill myself, and then haunt Richard the rest of his life????
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Or get over 'em already...
2005-09-11 [Beo-Wulf]: *Walks back in*....*Walks back out*....*I Forgot That I No Longer Work Here*......*Sorry I Walked Into The Diner*......*I Am Not Wanted Here Anymore*......So good bye y'alls......
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Ack! Wolfish angst! *passes out* *temporarily haunts [la vie lemon]-Emily*
2005-09-11 [Beo-Wulf]: .........................................................................................
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: If you're not going to stay here, was there really any point... in... COMING IN HERE TO SAY YOU'RE NOT GOING TO COME IN HERE?!
2005-09-11 [Beo-Wulf]: No I guess not........................
2005-09-11 [nokaredes]: Don't egg them on....
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...But you're not leaving...
2005-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *calls his loyal lions to his side* ...........*sends them to attack Turkey*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *snaps fingers* *the chickens intercept the lion's assault*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Mortimer... we meet again...
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *calls the wolves to her side* Stay with me....we're gonna sit this one out......*sit a circle around everyone*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh huh... freaky...
2005-09-11 [Angelic nightmares]: *nodds head* Chickens, Wolfs, and Lions.....did you ever expect the diner to have this many packs of animals?
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Why, of course! ...I was talking about that snail... *points at snail* freaky looking...
2005-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ♥[Sagacious Turkey]♥
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ack! Again?!
2005-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: [♥RON♥]
2005-09-11 [ally]: wth? a fan?
2005-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: [♥RUPERT GRINT♥]
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes... a fan... behold it, in all it's twirly, air-blowing goodness...
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...[~Crimson Angel~]... You seem to be the kind of person that would enjoy this quiz! ... http://www.crush007.com/love.cgi?id=1126205551qxa ...
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...mwa ha ha haa!
2005-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *cocks an eyebrow*WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks nose*
2005-09-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...(in response to the most recent quiz results) Blasphemer! How dare you toy with my emotions?! *sobsob*
2005-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT?!?!
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *raises her eye brows* otay....I think I missed a bit.....
2005-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah you did,but i am confused and i am the one who has been talking to him.
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: You two dating or something??
2005-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELL NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]:
WHAT?!
*smacks [Angelic nightmares] upside the head*
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *bites turkeys hand off* Dont hit me! I'm in no mood for your beatings today.
2005-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: For once I am thanking [Sagacious Turkey],Thank You For smacking her upside the head.
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: Otay.....gang on up the Wolf because she asked a question
2005-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why did you ask that question??
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh... *eats ramen*
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: You said that you were confused and that your the one talking to him. And I thought maybe ya'lls was dating
2005-09-12 [Shade Wolf]: Hello
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...are you going somewhere with that "hello"... or shall I call the chickens...?
2005-09-12 [Shade Wolf]: *grabs a turkey baister*
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...chickens it is! *the gang of chickens burst in... and... well... you know the rest!*
2005-09-12 [Shade Wolf]: *Bastes the chickens in honey*
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *sends her wolf pack after the chickens*
2005-09-12 [Shade Wolf]: *weilds the turkey baster like a lightsaber*
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *watches as the wolves tear the chickens to pieces* I got it......*puts her hand on Richards shoulder*
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: .................................
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: Arg! *throws her math textbook across the wiki*
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: *Jumps out of the way*....
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: Oups! Sorry! >_<
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: Its alright....So what up?
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: uhm...I hate math, for one. I hate going to Olney, for another. >_> I was just having a bible-verses-fight at a Christian wiki...and I can't see my bed for all the papers on it. ^_^ Papers [la vie lemon]-Emily graciously hid at her house while I was on 'vacation'. Otherwise they'd have all been thrown out by the control freak of a mother I have...who I could kill in her sleep right now...if I felt like it.
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: *has scared you off with weird ramblyness* >_>
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: *and homicidalness*
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: People in glass houses sink ships.
2005-09-12 [la vie lemon]: ...a penny saved is worth two in the bush!
2005-09-12 [la vie lemon]: Olney sucks, and I rock. ^.^
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: And don't cross the road if you can't get out of the kitchen! :D // You'd rock more if you'd give me a ride...
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: Hi Raven Wolf! *hands you a cup of coffee and my cheeks run pink as my eyes fill with tears* I'm sorry.....*walks away*
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: Thanks for the coffee....*Goes outside and sits*
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: *Walks back into the diner*....And *Has a seat*
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks outside and sits next to Raven Wolf* You know your always welcome back here....
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: Yeah well thats not how it feels tho...................
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *follows Raven Wolf* Because at times, people get pissed, and then things are said......Turkey wants as many people here so the comments dont stop......
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: alright
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: So.....you staying? Or going? Cause if you staying, I'm sure you can be a waitor agian.....or if you just want to be a customer.......
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: Im staying...But just for now I want to just be a customer
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: Kay......*takes out a small pad of paper* Anything I can get ya?
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: no I am alright.....Thanks tho.....
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: Kay......*looks around* Well theres not really much for me to do....Mind if I sit next to you?
2005-09-12 [Beo-Wulf]: alright....
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits next to you*
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: It's weird being a customer at a place where you've worked. ._.
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: I wouldn't know......I started out a customer, and ended up a waitress
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and you can just as easily be a customer again... *shakes fist*... Woo! You go, girl! Ramble!
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: No...that's ok. I like being a waitress. I got [Beo-Wulf] I mean Josh to come back......
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...riiiiiight...
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: I did. *feels proud* Anyways.....*goes back to working*
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and don't you forget it!
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: *cleans up a small coffee spill*
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: You're supposed to make coffee spills, not clean them up...
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Seems like she'd know that by now...
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: Yeppers.
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: mmm... peppers...
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: Ack! No rhyming!
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... er... bad timing...?
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: Don't make me quit commenting...
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ok... ok... in recompense, I shall give you a ring!
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: heh heh... I'm stopping... don't leave me...
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: ooh...shiny...
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yup... I pawned it off some "Frodo" fella... In fact, he seemed quite happy to be rid of it!
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: :O
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: What'd you give him for it?
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nothing much... just a coupon for a free haircut at Bob's Haircut Palace...
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: There's a "Bob's Haircut Palace"?
2005-09-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...there is now!
2005-09-12 [Angelic nightmares]: First a Diner....now a hair cut palace? Bob trying to get more business??
2005-09-12 [nokaredes]: *starts a bankruptcy rumor*
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*agrees with the rumor*... *the rumor spreads like butter over hot toast in the diner, and slowly melts away... into a delicious flavor!* ...*eats rumor on his Poptart*
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly shakes her head* mmmm-hmmm.
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: ...How did [█○█Mexican-Pimp █○█] get those things in his name? O_o
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: No one's talking.
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn Mexican flag!
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: Have I accused you lately of being a racist?
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...probably...
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: You don't remember? >_>
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah yeah... my best friends are Mexicans... and whatnot...
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: I have no Mexican friends! An El Salvadorian, sure...but no Mexicans!
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...same difference... they're all brown skinned...
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: Racist.
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nuh uh! ...I also dislike white people...
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: ...I'm white!
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...not all white people!
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: Don't try to cover up now...
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: "I also dislike white people"... it doesn't say which white people!
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes*
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you*
2005-09-13 [Shade Wolf]: *starts the rumor that turkey and bob are lovers*
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Shhh! ...the world mustn’t know yet!
2005-09-13 [Beo-Wulf]: So....[Shade Wolf] Whats the deal with [Angelic nightmares]....Are you still with her?.....
2005-09-13 [Shade Wolf]: Why is it any of your business,not trying to sound rude but I don't really feel like being questioned by the whole world.
2005-09-13 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Come up to [Beo-Wulf] Lay my Head on your Shoulder and *Feeling the Baby Kick*
2005-09-13 [Beo-Wulf]: I did not mean to sound like that...I just wondered thats all......Hello Emily.....*Please tell My Son That I really love him*
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: O_o?
2005-09-13 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Owww *Kick relly Hard*
2005-09-13 [Beo-Wulf]: What?....[nokaredes]....I have a son....His name is Taylor Joseph Russeau
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: [xXTwilightXRose Xx]... back again I see...? So... they finally let you out of the institute...?
2005-09-13 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: It not born yet but be soon in NOV here *Rubbing my Belly*
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: "It"?
2005-09-13 [Beo-Wulf]: Turkey leave her alone....Alright
2005-09-13 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: .....................................
2005-09-13 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: I had hear what you been way Turkey in here I had read some thing what other had say know that I'm not going to say much but know you really need to leave me alone.
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn wolf... respect me, I say!
2005-09-13 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: *Looking over at [Beo-Wulf] with sad eyes he kick me again here!*
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs* Come on Guys! NO FIGHTING!!!! Or else I'll sick my wolf pack on you, and I'm sur Turkey's chickens need some exercise.....
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: The chickens are just a minority... you forget the other beasts that creep within the floorboards of this diner...
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: And got forget the lions, the wall scum, the floor gremlins, and the bathroom ghost *nudges turkey in the arm* installed the ghost this morning
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: *offended noise*
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...so I see... only one flaw in your plan... we have no bathroom! ...only an outhouse/make-out shack...
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: damn.....oh well....then I guess we have a random ghost floating around then
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: That bathroom ghost's name wouldn't happen to be...Myrtle, would it?
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...exactly my thoughts...
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: Well...seeing as it's midnight, and I have to get up at 6...I'm going to bed. I shall try some more elf-sleep tonight. ^_^ (feel free to ask me if you have no clue what I'm on about...)
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nooo! Don't leave me! ...I might need you for something!
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: What's elf-sleep?
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: But I have to wake up early!
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: What's elf-sleep
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: When I sleep but am aware of what's going on in the house at the same time. So cool! :D
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: I do that.....tho in the dead of the night I sleep like I'm dead
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...ok... ok... smell ya later!
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *changes into her wolf form and sniffs [nokaredes]*
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?!
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: You said "smell ya later" I wanted to know why we were waiting to smell her, when we could do that now......
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: Puns! // Don't be jealous, Dustin...other people can smell me too...but they've been doing it way too much this week. >_>
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: This is my first time this week
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Who?! Who else has been sniffing you?! *gets club*
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *back away* My very first and quite possibly last time ever sniffing her...I swear!!!
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: ROFL
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: If I'm gonna get beat with a club, I'm not gonna sniff her.....other people yes.....but not her
2005-09-13 [Beo-Wulf]: Ummm......*Weird*.............
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: riiiiight...
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *lays down under a table and yawns* God I'm tired...I'm helping out with the Happy Birthday! wiki page, and on tuesdays and saturdays i have to send out birthday cards.....and today i had to send 77 birthday cards.....
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: What's the point...?
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: Tired as hell.......
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: *offended noise* ...They said they were going to let me help Tuesdays and Saturdays, but then they said someone else 'filled the position'...that was you?! *fumes*
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: I don;t know if it was me.....I was just told that I have to send things out Tuesday and Saturday. Why don't you take Saturdays, and I'll do Tuesdays??
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *giggles*
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: As if...you wanted to do it, so you can do it. -_-
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: I need help tho. I can't do that on my own.
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: Are you laughing at me???
2005-09-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... no?
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: *lays down*
2005-09-13 [nokaredes]: All you have to do is copy the message before you send the first one...then you can paste it and it'll go faster that way. Are you sending to active members, or everyone who has a birthday?
2005-09-13 [Angelic nightmares]: I was told everyone who has a birthday, that's been active for less that 100 days
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: ...then that's just active members. >_>
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: I can't take Saturday anymore...my mom won't let me on the computer on the weekends (technically).
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...whyzat?
2005-09-14 [Angelic nightmares]: Shit...I mean shoot....what about Tuesdays? I alreayd got todays done.....
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have nothing to do! I can help! ...or I can sit here and slowly rot like usual! Yay!
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: ...hmm...okay. But I think you have to ask [Sunny Silverunicorn] first...
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nah... that'll take too long...
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: Not you. >_<
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... right...
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: Yea...like you knew.
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: You forget... I know all... ALL, I TELL YOU!
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: Ok...where did I just go?
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: Then you don't know all! XD
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I knew you'd say that...
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: That's because it was obvious.
2005-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I know...
2005-09-14 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes*
2005-09-14 [Angelic nightmares]: *walks in and lays down* ........... *sighs*
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: No one commented today! Worthless oafs! >:O
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: I dont think anyone commented yesterday either......
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: Yesterday was the 14th.
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: Everyone besides [Angelic nightmares] fucking sucks. x_x
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: Awww *hugs snowmen* WOO-HOO!!
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: ...don't get all mushy on me >_>
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: Sorry....*lets go*
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: *brushes invisible wrinkles out of her nightgown* So...what new fabulous freak of nature should we invent tonight?
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: hmmm *sits and thinks* Ha ha! The little demon creep that......no......how about? that would never work.....I dont know.......
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: I dunno either. :\
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *thinks harder* OUCHIE!!!! HEAD-AHCE!!!!
2005-09-16 [weasel2]: then take the monkey off your head silly
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *looks up* Oh....that monkey ..... *puts the monkey down*
2005-09-16 [weasel2]: hehehe
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: Theres a ghost in my kitchen. I walked in there for a glass of milk, and I could sense it.....then walking out of the kitchen I seen it........and now its looking over my left shoulder.....gone now..........thankfully....
2005-09-16 [Beo-Wulf]: A ghost?....What are you talking about?
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: Theres a ghost that keeps touching my hands and legs.....mostly my hands
2005-09-16 [Beo-Wulf]: like how do you mean?...How many time tonight?....Have you seen it?....And if so can you see who it is?
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: I can sense them member? i don't know how many times its touched my hand...it keeps doing it.....I can only "see" it when i look out of the corner of my eye....even then its hard to see it
2005-09-16 [Beo-Wulf]: *Weird*....Do you feel scared?.....
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: Nah.....used to it.....
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: My hands being touched and my hairs being played with.....
2005-09-16 [Beo-Wulf]: I know..............................
2005-09-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha! Ha ha! ...ghosts... that's rich... and you're all unoriginal! *the flock of venomous flamingos burst in through the roof and fly off with everyone*
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *goes to the back room crying and throws dishes at the wall*
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: :O You don't believe in ghosts?
2005-09-16 [Angelic nightmares]: *screams "I do!!!"*
2005-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: HAHAHAHAHA
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: What?
2005-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *evil grin*muhahaha
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: Whatever. I'm watching a Histories Mysteries on ghost ships...The Flying Dutchman was cursed by God! :O
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: LLAMA SONG! http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/llama
2005-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: *sticks tongue out*
2005-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs tongue with tongs and puts a tongue ring in [nokaredes]'s tongue*
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: Ooh...another one. My mom will be twice as pissed ;P
2005-09-16 [nokaredes]: http://www.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewProfile&friendID=3903567&Mytoken=20050517155935 LMAO!
2005-09-16 [weasel2]: monkey braines
2005-09-17 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay leave [Angelic nightmares] Alone!!!!!
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: Huh?
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *drops a dish and comes out of the back room with a shocked look on her face* Josh?
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks [Beo-Wulf] upside the head* ...What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?!
2005-09-17 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: Hey Leave [Beo-Wulf] alone don't to smacks on the Head *Give Hug to [Beo-Wulf]*.......................
2005-09-17 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes [Angelic nightmares]?
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: I don't even understand that sentence. O_o
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: Surpriseingly enuf....I did understand her...... You *shakes her head in confusion* you stuck up for me.....why?
2005-09-17 [Beo-Wulf]: Yes I did...Why?
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes her head slightly* just surprised.....thats all
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: You know....I think Dustin's used the venomous flamingos before...
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *shrugs* never seen them until now
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: Well...you...wouldn't remember, with your "life" interfering...
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: Yeah.......my lifes always infering no matter what I'm doing.....
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead* I need to find some intelligent members, other than me, [nokaredes], and [Mortified Penguin]...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: :O [la vie lemon]! ...except when she's wrong about plots...*does the I-told-her-so dance*
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...she's hardly ever on...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: ...so?
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...let me rephrase that... I need to find some intelligent members, other than me, [nokaredes], and [Mortified Penguin] that are on at least once a week...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: ...so...where will you find these "intelligent members"?
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes*
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pokes you*
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: I'm willing to bet that my mom will come in here and tell me my room needs to be cleaned very soon...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: And...right on cue ._. Am I getting good at that, or what?
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...ha! ...my room needs cleaning too... there are legos... EVERYWHERE!!!
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: My bedroom floor is--no exaggeration--covered ankle deep in laundry. x_x Now it's all on the bed! XD But there aren't...textbooks and things randomly in it anymore...and I cleaned Willow's cage! So it's clean enough...for now...
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! ..."Willow"?!
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: ...my gerbil. Duh.
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I knew that...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: Liar.
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: *raises her eyebrows* huh! I have 4 mice, and a dog
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: I have 4 cats, a dog and 2 gerbils ^_^ But one is not my responsibility.
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: My "family" has 8 cats, 6 dogs, several fish I don't care about, and two turtles...
2005-09-17 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm thinking about letting one of my mice go....he was wild when a friend caught him...and I nursed him back to health.....'E at least deserves to be free
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nah...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: Turtles? *is jealous*
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...you wouldn't be if you knew how bad they stink...
2005-09-17 [nokaredes]: Well...I found a dead one once...
2005-09-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I see dead ones all the time... by the water... on the road...
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: Hmph.
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Whatcha hmphing about...?
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: Ewww.....
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: That you see dead ones all the time! I don't see dead ones all the time...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: Only dead thing I see......is....well.....sides ghosts.....but I don't normally see dead animals......Well...unless you count flies.....but then I've killed those
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: I only see ghosts when I don't wear my glasses...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: huh......I see them all the time.....my dad thinks its awesome.....its a bit creepy at times......but I've been able to do it since I was little....so I'm used to it
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: I've done it since I was little too...still scares the shit out of me. Useful sometimes though. >_>
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *scratches his lower torso*
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...interesting... veeery interesting...
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: Eew.
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *munches on chips* *chokes* ...heeey... these are poker chips! *shrugs* *continues eating chips*
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: So...are those poker chips...chocolate-coated? >_>
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...nope... really hard plastic...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: ah
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: *whispers* He has a chocolate fetish.
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nuh uh! ...I have an Allie fetish...
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: O_o
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh... heh heh...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: uh huh....
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: So...ghosts!
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah... them ghosts...
2005-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...aaeeeiii, and whatnot...
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: *jumps*
2005-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: HAHAHA
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: Grrr...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits*
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: Dinaer!
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: *drops a few glasses on the floor*
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sticks thumb up* ...that's the old Bob's Diner spirit!
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and so is this! *docks the glasses from your pay*...
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: uhh...Helkaer!
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: And that's mean! :O
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: mwa ha ha haa!
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: fine.....*conguers a few plates and send them hurtling across the room* Ha! Those I used magick to get! you can't deduct those
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: No...but he could deduct the damage to the room...if he wanted to be mean like that...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: True.....but he can't....he doesn't even pay me
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...which means you'll owe me!
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...or... should I say, you'll owe [Mortified Penguin]...
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: Is Mortimer the new owner of this wiki?
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh huh...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: I thought you were the owner.....*slips a 50 in Mortifieds back pocket*
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: *sigh*
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: You otay?
2005-09-18 [nokaredes]: I don't like it when Mortimer is the owner.
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: Oh....I like Turkey as the owner.....
2005-09-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well... it is his wiki anyway...
2005-09-18 [Angelic nightmares]: I always thought it was yours tho....
2005-09-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *[in her wolf form] sighs and lays down*
2005-09-19 [nokaredes]: What's wrong?
2005-09-19 [Angelic nightmares]: same as always
2005-09-19 [nokaredes]: hmm...
2005-09-19 [Angelic nightmares]: *sighs and lays under the moon*
2005-09-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...mmm hmm...
2005-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*............ uh huh........ record the video, you idiot....
2005-09-19 [nokaredes]: ...video?
2005-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Dustin's recordin' a video about Naruto and Robot Chicken.
2005-09-19 [nokaredes]: What kind of video?
2005-09-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well... I was recording it... but nooow... *stomps tape*... I'm also adding an Aqua Teen Hungerforce, a Stroker and Hoop, a Harvey Birdman: Attorney at law, and a Family Guy...
2005-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
2005-09-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Mwa ha ha haa!!!
2005-09-19 [Angelic nightmares]: huh........
2005-09-20 [nokaredes]: Why do we only have one alcoholic beverage on the menu? u_u
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: Which ones that?
2005-09-20 [nokaredes]: Alcopop lemonade (it's British)
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: Oh......
2005-09-20 [nokaredes]: ^_^ So why's it the only one...?
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: *shrugs*
2005-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...now there's another one!
2005-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: (You'd have to read Stickman to understand the first two products mentioned)
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: I was thinking of adding one also....
2005-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...you do that...
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: I will later today! I swear
2005-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...suuuuure you will!
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: I will!
2005-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... riiiiiight...
2005-09-20 [Angelic nightmares]: I swear I will.....
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...couldn't you have done it in the time it took to say that you were going to do it later...?
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah I could have......
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: Why did you pee on the flag...?
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I was bored... get over it!
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Its up there now
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh great... now I'm blind... if only you would have put it up 2 minutes ago!
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Why?
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh... yah know... rampaging attack Waggas from the sky... (Don't ask! *shakes fist* ...I know you were thinking about asking... well... just so NO!)
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *can't resist asking* Whats a wagga?
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: hmmm...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: do you know?
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *hides and prepares for the worse* I'm sorry...I couldn't resist.......
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gets a stick* ...imma flog you, boy!
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: ...she's a girl.
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...duh...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Mesa chick!
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: ...We know.
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins and continutes hiding*
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: ...he's not on, you know...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *pokes her head out* Oh...ok....*walks out from her hiding place and finds a place to sit at the bar*
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: Do you believe in magic and things...?
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Yeah.........why?
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: uhm...well...I'm totally not going to try to summon something...if that's what you're asking...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Its ok.....
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: What is? >_>
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: What you said
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: ...I say a lot <_<
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: About summoning
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: I said nothing about summoning......*innocence*
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *smirks* Kay....I didn't hear nuttin then
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...riiiiiight... I believe that there was "witchcraft" once... but not anymore... it's... died out... all them anti-witch folk... burnin' them books...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: Witchcraft is still around.....What do you think I've been doing? My religions Wicca......it deals with Witchcraft
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh huh... riiiiight...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm sirus.....
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Reeaaallly now...
2005-09-21 [Beo-Wulf]: whats is going on?....Cant you people leave [Angelic nightmares] Alone....Got A Problum?...Deal With Me....I am also involved in Wicca and WitchCraft
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pimp slamps [Beo-Wulf]*
2005-09-21 [Beo-Wulf]: You Monther Fucker....*Pulls out his 9mm*....and...*Begins To Shot....*DIE MONTHER FUCKER DIE!!!!!
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha ha ha... foolish wannabe wolf... you would dare touch your superior in such a manner...?
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes* So...[Beo-Wulf]...wicca? >_>
2005-09-21 [Beo-Wulf]: Well when you mess with [Angelic nightmares] You are messing with me....Yes thats right Wicca
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *hides under a table*
2005-09-21 [Beo-Wulf]: Hay [Angelic nightmares]...Come here....Lets go outside
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *pokes her head out from under the table and follows [Beo-Wulf] outside*
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...idgit! Wouldn't it be a shame... if my dear friend, [Mortified Penguin], were to ban you...?
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *pokes her head back in* Me or him?
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*... how should I know...? S'not my wiki...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: I didn't do anything tho
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... still not my wiki...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits*
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: ...on Dustin?
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Wh- what?!
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: Well...she said that right after you'd been talking...and I've been sitting on people all day...so i was just wondering if she was sitting on you...
2005-09-21 [Angelic nightmares]: No....Ish sitting on the floor
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...sitting on people... like Ben Hersh!
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: ...and Liz and Chickyboo...*waggles finger*
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is entranced by the waggling finger*
2005-09-21 [nokaredes]: Weirdo.
2005-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: You know... I would be offended... but I'm so used to people calling me that...
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: Which is not something I'd be bragging about. >_>
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *chuckles*
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: *whispers* He's jealous. <_< Like Ben's GF! I don't like her...even if she does have the same name as a superhero...
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: What is it? If you don't mind me asking....
2005-09-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: What? Me...? jealous? ...well... maybe!
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: ...Jenny...
2005-09-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head*
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: *helps you*
2005-09-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is smacked*
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: ...kinky. >_>
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes her head and curls up under-neath a random table*
2005-09-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh...
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: "Another day at the office...another nap under the desk." XD
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *grins*
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: So what's up?
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *her ears pirk up* same as always
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: ok. So are you doing something on the Equinox tomorrow?
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: Not even sure.....Emotions are hay-wire and I dont want anything back firing.......I might tho......not sure what to do tho
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: Some people just eat and celebrate on the Equinox, without doing anything magical...I think I'll be lazy and do that ^^;
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: I have to say a blessing for a friend, and ask the Goddess to keep an eye out on her.....the current Hurricane's gonna hit Texas where she lives, and shes not sure when she'll be able to get back on line....
2005-09-22 [Beo-Wulf]: Who?
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: [Bookwyrm].......Me and her have gotten extremely close....
2005-09-22 [Beo-Wulf]: oh....I C
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: Yeah.....me and her have been talking about you-know-who.....her's my goof buddy!
2005-09-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: you-know-who...? Voldemort?!
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: *laughs slightly and shakes her head* No....[Shade Wolf]
2005-09-22 [nokaredes]: [Shade Wolf] is He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named? What?
2005-09-22 [Angelic nightmares]: No....I've been refering to [Shade Wolf] as you-know-who, when I dont want to actually type his name....
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: ...So why wouldn't you want to use his name?
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: He's got me extremely hurt and pissed
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: Oh. *pats*
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *lays down*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: ...my fingers are so itchy...
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *sighs*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: *does same*
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *sighs as tears soak into my fur*
2005-09-23 [Beo-Wulf]: Awwww....[Angelic nightmares] come here.....
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: *is no psychaitrist but knows something is wrong*
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *slowly walks up to [Beo-Wulf] and jumps into his lap and continues to cry*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: >->
2005-09-23 [Beo-Wulf]: Now now....Its going to be alright......
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *shakes her head* Can't promise something like that.....I just lost the one person who meant the world to me, because f*cking [Death's Die-Ary] brain washed [Shade Wolf]
2005-09-23 [Beo-Wulf]: I know that...........
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *sighs*
2005-09-23 [Beo-Wulf]: ......................................
2005-09-23 [Angelic nightmares]: *licks [Beo-Wulf] on the cheek*
2005-09-23 [Beo-Wulf]: I am going to go to bed now.....I will talk to you later.....Nite
2005-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: By order of me I declare that everyone with the word "wolf" in their respectable user names be banned. (except for White Wolf, she's cool...) This has been your first warning. Any one who does not comply with this ban will be reported. Thank you.
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Wh- what?! How dare you?! ...How dare you not mention anything about name changing so they can still come back?!
2005-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Shhhhhh....... that will get them punished even more severly.......
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...so I see... *is attacked by a rogue wagga* ...well... NOW I don't see...
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: ...I would change my name to something with "wolf" if he hadn't used the power of the Guards...
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: The guards don't much care for him anyway...
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: Gee, I wonder why?
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...'tis a mystery...
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: Is not!
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...well... it could be!
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: ...not really.
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...yeah, yeah... today has been the best day EVER! ...First I found a penny, then I found a dime, and then I found a quarter! *jumps up and down whilst squealing with delight*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: My BDE was Wednesday ^_^ Everything went right...it's karma, I say! XD
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: And just what made it the BDE...?
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: Everything went right! >_<
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: I know that! ...but what sort of things were the things that went right...?
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: uhm...well...I did well on a health test I didn't study for...and things like that. >_>
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: *yawns*
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's... Sara!
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: Yup, as far as you know. ;]
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... definitely Sara...
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: And you would definitely be Dustin....
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nuh uh! ...I could just as easily be Jr... *picks nose* *flips off a baby* *doesn't take a bath* *fails a test and tells everyone he really made a hundred* ...see...? It's not hard to be Jr.!
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: I'm totally failing my next test.
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: Lmao...That's Jr alright....But you happen to be Dustin..
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: What's it about...? // yup... *coughasfarasyouknowcough*...
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: I dunno...
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: *coughIknowmorethanyouthinkuncough*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: uncough?
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks head* ...that explains it... // ...well... I don't think you know anything... sooo... you know one thing! Get over it, already!
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: o.o Screw you!... Yes, uncough...There a problem? :]
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: *rolls eyes* I mean it doesn't matter...I'm failing on purpose! // No...but I've never heard of it before...
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Why would you want to do that?!
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: Because I did too well on the one I got back today...
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...must have been horrible...
2005-09-23 [the 13th Star]: Its so big in here and so many foods....*looks around in awe*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: It was.
2005-09-23 [sara(:]: So you're trying to fail..because you made too well on yesterday's..? That's quite new.
2005-09-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens (wearing football attire) burst in, slam into [the 13th Star], drive him out the back wall, and tackle him in the streets*
2005-09-23 [nokaredes]: Bobswig!
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Is [Sagacious Turkey] still here?
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: If by "still here" you mean "still alive"...then...yes.
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: no I mean still on elftown.
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: If by "still on Elftown" you mean "didn't forget his password" then...also yes.
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: umm,I mean is he still logged in?
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: ...No.
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: Crybaby.
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok if you talk to him tell him to message me.
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: uhm...about what? >_>
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: just tell him i want to ask him a question.
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: Why don't you go ask him the question, and save us both the trouble?
2005-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks nose* ...what kind of idiot are you two talking about...?
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: We were talking about you...last night...
2005-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well... that explains a lot...
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: Misty has a question to ask you, and she wants you to message her. >_>
2005-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: She already messaged me... and in reply I sent, "Lady, you don't want to know..."
2005-09-25 [nokaredes]: ...that makes no sense to me as she never told me the question...but, okay...
2005-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...exactly...
2005-09-26 [Beo-Wulf]:   This Is Very True
2005-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...totally...
2005-09-26 [nokaredes]: Image hosted by angelfire? O_o
2005-09-26 [nokaredes]: Ok, I know what it is ^_^
2005-09-26 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm back...I was at a friends a;; weekend....and it gave me some time to clear my mind....
2005-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *wonders when Mort will get on again*
2005-09-26 [Angelic nightmares]: Can he really ban people?
2005-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pats your back* ...as far as you know...
2005-09-26 [Angelic nightmares]: *lays down*
2005-09-26 [nokaredes]: I don't think he can ban people...
2005-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: From this wiki he can...
2005-09-26 [nokaredes]: Well if he's going to be mean and discriminatory like that, then we should all leave.
2005-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha! Like heck I'm leaving!
2005-09-26 [nokaredes]: I think you did leave though. IRONY! XD
2005-09-26 [Angelic nightmares]: Then why don't you make a new Bob's Diner? Least then, with you as owner, nobody would have to worry about getting banned
2005-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead* // Because that would just be... STUPID! I could just as easily take back this wiki...
2005-09-27 [nokaredes]: *uses your head as the bongo* I like Midnite's plan better. You guys are always stealing this wiki from each other...
2005-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...not really...
2005-09-27 [nokaredes]: ...uh huh!
2005-09-27 [Angelic nightmares]: yeah really....you just said that you could always steal the wiki back....
2005-09-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...but I won't!
2005-09-28 [Angelic nightmares]: Why not? Itd be in better hands then....
2005-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: He made 'Bob's Diner' up on paper... I just made the wiki... he says that I "stole his idea" so it's rightfully his wiki... if I made another wiki, it'd take too much time and trouble... so it's not worth it...
2005-09-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pats your back* ...you'd never make a good lawyer...
2005-09-28 [nokaredes]: It's Mortimer's "intellectual property" then. >_>
2005-09-28 [nokaredes]: Because that was a bad argument. <_<
2005-09-28 [nokaredes]: He did steal Mort's idea! >_< ...But that doesn't mean the wiki isn't his.
2005-09-28 [nokaredes]: It said my name once...so what?
2005-09-28 [nokaredes]: Actually, I think I have been the page owner of this wiki 3 times. O_o
2005-09-28 [nokaredes]: XD
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead*
2005-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: all of you have been banned!
2005-09-29 [sara(:]: *cough* Riiight..
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: A-hem! ...be more specific...
2005-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry........*ahem* all wolves have been banned! (except for White Wolf) This is my wiki, therefore I can ban you from it!
2005-09-29 [sara(:]: There ya go.
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: You heard the woman- er... I mean... the man-penguin!
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: I just... hmm... maybe I should say it in a secret language noboby here knows... 'cepting o' course ol' chav... yanarge yacasima yala yaddedaolnwo
2005-09-29 [nokaredes]: *ish offended* I must avenge this...injustice! XD
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...riiiiiiiight...
2005-09-29 [nokaredes]: ...that reminds me, I have to check my email.
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...whatever for...?
2005-09-29 [nokaredes]: An email. Duh.
2005-09-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Cool! ...I never get emails... *sobsob*
2005-09-29 [Angelic nightmares]: You cant ban people from a wiki page! [Hedda] said so!!
2005-09-29 [nokaredes]: But since he told you to get off his wiki, he can get you banned for harrasment. >_> Just, take 'wolf' out of your UN.
2005-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I'm watching Night Stalker!
2005-09-30 [nokaredes]: I don't think anyone cares.
2005-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...that's good... I'm not watching it anymore...
2005-09-30 [Angelic nightmares]: How is it harrasment? And why should I have to change my SN because someone feels like discrimintaing people because of the word "WOLF" in their screen name???
2005-09-30 [nokaredes]: ...Because it's his wiki. ;P
2005-09-30 [Angelic nightmares]: I understand that. But I shouldn't have to change my SN, becuase he feels like being childish, and starts to discriminate against those with wolf in their names
2005-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...or maybe it's because the people with "wolf" in their names are idiots...
2005-09-30 [Angelic nightmares]: I'm not an Idiot. I just act it at times
2005-09-30 [nokaredes]: Bwahaha! ...Oh, and I officially boycot this wiki. Watch it writhe in pain. *waves cheerily and goes off to scare [la vie lemon] with an "AH-HA" of doom (in a reference only one person will get)*
2005-09-30 [Beo-Wulf]: What no Waitor?...Whats up with that?
2005-09-30 [Angelic nightmares]: Well.....turns out that [Shade Wolf] only cares about his fat cow...er....I mean gf....and since he hasn't came back here, I took his name down
2005-09-30 [Beo-Wulf]: Oh I See.....Hmmm.......
2005-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: He is sooo going to report every one of you...
2005-09-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and what good will it do if you put "wolf" in your name and boycot it...? He's most likely just going to make a forum and keep a few members anyway...
2005-10-02 [Angelic nightmares]: You can't ban people because they have WOLF in their screen-name!! Yeah I might have changed my name, But damnit! I"m not going to fucking take wolf out of it, becuase some dumb bastard wants to be childish!!!
2005-10-02 [Beo-Wulf]: Damn Right
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ooo... I so gotta call Mort and tell him to get on...
2005-10-02 [Beo-Wulf]: What Ever.........[Angelic nightmares] Has a very good point...."You can't ban people because they have WOLF in their screen-name"
2005-10-02 [Beo-Wulf]: What Ever.........[Angelic nightmares] Has a very good point...."You can't ban people because they have WOLF in their screen-name"
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: If that's her point, I must say... it's a pretty dull point... I mean, it couldn't even draw blood! ...It's his wiki and he can do whatever he wants with it... it's not the usernames he's banning you people for or he would have banned [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice] too... it's because you're idiots... And if he can't ban you for that, there's always other reasons... such as your defiance toward his request for you to leave... or maybe because he was called a "dumb bastard" and "childish"... would you want people like that on your wiki...? Eh, wolfy...? ...*smacks you*...
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...you just ruminate on that awhile...
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...and FYI, you and your gay lover are uuuuugly! (even uglier before I made some slight edits!)
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I was drinking some milk when I looked at your house... you should seriously do stand-up! Milk flew all out of my nose when I read under that picture that you said "she" was cute!
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: LOL, man... L... O... frickin' L...
2005-10-02 [xXTwilightXRose Xx]: FUCK YOU ASS HOLE YOU ALL LOSER!!!!!!!
2005-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Tisk tisk... such a shame... you remind me of a retard in a comic I read recently...
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: These people are idiots........ oh well, everybody, except Dustin, Allie, White Wolf, and I, is banned from here, at the moment.......... AT THE MOMENT........... *eats ramen*......... *ponders awhile*......
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Casey, David, and B.J...?
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, they're exceptions, too.....
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: What about Sara, Jamie, Megan, Kaitlyn, Autumn, Brittany, and the rest of their 'click'...?
2005-10-03 [nokaredes]: *clique
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...that's what the little thingys are for!
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: .....they are banned, as well...... for now ........*eats ramen*............*watches Naruto*
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn straight they are... and your brothers...?
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: When "Naruto's group" get to the tower in the center of the Forest of Death, what's the answer to that riddle...?
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: "sure".........we'll discuss who all's going to be able to get on here at the AAA learnatorium we are forced to attend every weekday....... also known as "school".......
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...not the learnatorium... NOOOO!!! AAAAEEEIII!!! NEVER!!! I REFUSE!!! ...ok...
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ......that's what I thought.....
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! You thought?! ...that's a first...
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yes...... you ruminate on that...... while we're platicating, do you want to make some capricious changes to the diner...?
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Why yes... yes I do... just don't change the lymeric, the "today's special", or #18 on Drinks...
2005-10-03 [nokaredes]: ...better not take my alcohol...
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...or Allie's alcohol...
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: okey doke........ got to go!
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh huh... I bet you do...
2005-10-03 [Angelic nightmares]: I am not leaving this wiki
2005-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Fool... do not defy me! I am your superior! Now... away with you... before I get the guillotine!
2005-10-03 [bluefairy27]: Enjoy and don't forget to choke on it my sweet annoyance... 
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Riiiiiiiight...
2005-10-03 [bluefairy27]: Hmm...don't you mean right not 'riiiiiiiight'?
2005-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-10-03 [la vie lemon]: ok...am i supposed to boycot too? >.>
2005-10-04 [la vie lemon]: I probably am...but I dont think I'd make much of a difference...so I''ll just have to settle for whacking people with this here golf club. *brandishes club*
2005-10-04 [nokaredes]: "this here"...?
2005-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: exactly!
2005-10-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: uh huh...
2005-10-04 [Angelic nightmares]: Okkk
2005-10-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in humming-
2005-10-04 [Angelic nightmares]: *sits down at te bar and lays her head down*
2005-10-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: i would like a job
2005-10-04 [nokaredes]: You can have mine. *throws her dunce cap on a table*
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gasp* ...I bought that hat just for you!
2005-10-05 [nokaredes]: Whatever.
2005-10-05 [bluefairy27]: hmm, i spy a little bit of tension with my tiny eye...
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Whatever you say, little fairy... whatever you say...
2005-10-05 [bluefairy27]: I know it is whatever I say, little Opus.
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...Suuuure you do...
2005-10-05 [bluefairy27]: I hope you know the more you try to annoy me the more i'm just going to talk to you?
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... and the more you unknowingly help raise the comment average... *rubs hands together and cackles maniacally* *hands spontaneously combust* ...darn it! That's the fourth time this week... and it's only Tuesday!
2005-10-05 [bluefairy27]: Unknowingly? Not hardly.
2005-10-05 [nokaredes]: ...it's not "spontaneously" really...
2005-10-05 [Rennie]: [Angelic nightmares]: You have been asked to leave. Do not post here again or you will be banned from Elftown for harassement. ET Guards.
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...HA!
2005-10-05 [nokaredes]: Wow, Erinbabe. O_O *shuts up*
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah... and [Rennie], while you're here, join!
2005-10-05 [Rennie]: No thank you. I've done my guardly duties here, and that's all I'm here for. :)
2005-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shakes fist* ...darn Jew...
2005-10-05 [nokaredes]: Ack! Stalker! O_O
2005-10-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: All betrayers of the diner are henceforth banned as decreed by me, in the name of [Mortified Penguin].
2005-10-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...'betrayers' being those who joined the opposing wiki, pirates palace.
2005-10-08 [PixieStickChick]: Ok people. Who fuckin missed me :D
2005-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Whee! ...you haven't been here in a while...
2005-10-08 [Shade Wolf]: Elftown Restaurant is so much better !
2005-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: What's it matter...? They're all just wikis...
2005-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...'cept this is the oldest... the one with the most watchers... most page versions... and most comments...
2005-10-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...ah... you gotta love the smell of fresh baked milk in the morning... *sniffsniff* *gag* *hark*
2005-10-11 [TheEvilHat]: Pookinstien invented the theory of pookieness
2005-10-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: No... despite popular belief, it was Sir McPooky IV...
2005-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...damn Jews... *shakes fist*
2005-10-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: May i have some ramen?
2005-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure... do you prefer it alive or dead...?
2005-10-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: ummmmm dead
2005-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ok... *starts beating the ramen with a blunt club* *it growls and trys to attack*
2005-10-14 [Z!]: W00t How the fuck do I join!!!
2005-10-14 [bluefairy27]: put something on the menu
2005-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: By adding your name on You got served! At bob's diner that is!...
2005-10-14 [shir t.]: *waves* Hiya guys.
2005-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...yo! *salutes*
2005-10-14 [Living on a lie]: how do you join this diner
2005-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...by adding your name on You got served! At bob's diner that is!...
2005-10-14 [Saint Dragon]: ok i m what did you want?
2005-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Your soul! Mwa ha ha haa!!!
2005-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...hi.
2005-10-14 [Saint Dragon]: ...i'll sell you kir-bu's soul....
2005-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hmm... how much?
2005-10-14 [Saint Dragon]: 4k
2005-10-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey can i have my ramen please?
2005-10-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: who wants some of my coffee?
2005-10-15 [Saint Dragon]: well im not shiting you
2005-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hmm... Interesting... *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you both into the streets*
2005-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...don't mind those chickens... they do that from time to time...
2005-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -shakes her head and walks in- god...why are those chickens still here?
2005-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...'cause they have Bob for ransom...
2005-10-16 [Saint Dragon]: .... All i wanted was a pizza!! *voice fades as chickens carry him away*
2005-10-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a piece of pizza at you*
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *Starts eating all the breadsticks...*
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes... breadsticks... that's what they are...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: their Big, huge, throbbing, hot, and juicy too. such a wonderfull cook you guys have here...
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...yes... cook... that's what she is...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: nods. you guys should sell pixie sticks here.....just cause the feal all funked up when ya sniff em reall hard...
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: We did... until the pixie revolt of '03... thousands died...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: sad...sooo sad. i once had a "who can get a pixie high the fastest" contest at camp wich led to the "who can shove the most tootsie roles in their mouth contest" at church camp wich led to what looked like mounds of chocolatey poo all over the camp wich led to <<>> "other" things.....
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Interesting... veeery interesting... *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets*
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *eats the Chickens and walks back in* damn. cant eat anymore food!
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure you can! *stuffs more food down your craw hole*
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *regurgitates it all over the turkey* nopes pretty sure i cant.
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...We'll see... *stuffs more food*
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *throws up again* why arent you eating? *starts cramming food down ur throat!!*
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *was already full, so it starts coming out of random holes*
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *puts a cork in your random holes.....alll of them*
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ouch...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: haha..... no more food?
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes... food... that's what it is...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *coughs up a feather*
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes... a feather... that's what that was...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *blinks...*
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*... mortified penguin flavor!
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: ooh. sounds sooooo good. *eats chicken ramen.*
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...beef ramen, darn you! *shakes fist*
2005-10-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: *dirnks my coffee* its good
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *steals it* ...hmm... I've had better...
2005-10-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: well its poisened
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs*
2005-10-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks at you* your not worried?
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nah... My body's gotten used to poison by now... I mean... look at the place I hang out in! This place is a bio hazard!
2005-10-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: true.
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh huh... riiiight...
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *perches on the rafters and begins pouring CHIKEN ramen on the Turkeys head*
2005-10-17 [bluefairy27]: thats annoying
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *burns down the rafters*
2005-10-17 [bluefairy27]: what the hell does that have to do with anything?
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: really dont know. ooh the fire kinda tickles...
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the pride of lions burst in and drag [bluefairy27] into a dark alleyway*
2005-10-17 [An Eversor and Ender]: *stops pouring Chiken ramen so i can actually eat it.*
2005-10-17 [bluefairy27]: yeah uh-huh...that really did a lot
2005-10-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots a hole in the bottom of your ramen cup*
2005-10-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks at them* did i miss something?
2005-10-18 [An Eversor and Ender]: *causes me to pour the ramen on the Turkey again.* i dont know, did you?
2005-10-18 [shadowfire09]: I WANT TO EAT THE TURKEY....*sees madd* hey buddy *huggles8
2005-10-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *schlaps forehead*
2005-10-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks at madd* i dont know
2005-10-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I am your God! ...eat my toe scum!
2005-10-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: *bows down to you* ri will not eat toe scum
2005-10-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I LOVE [Sagacious Turkey]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...don't we all...?
2005-10-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: i guess
2005-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Riiiiiiiight...
2005-10-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: What??
2005-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nothing... nothing at all...
2005-10-20 [Saint Dragon]: AGAIn how did i get here and what did you want?
2005-10-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: BOO!!
2005-10-20 [garfield the cat]: http://www.bobs.com.br/ ...fast food chain in Brazil...
2005-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: eeck help i am being kidnapped by turkeys.
2005-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Wh- what?!
2005-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2005-10-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2005-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cnn news reporter next day:A young girl was found dead yesterday witnesses say she was attacked and killed by a gang of turkeys who attacked her kidnapped and killed her vets have taken the turkeys and the turkeys are under servalence to see what caused this agressive behavier we will have more on this tomorrow.
2005-10-20 [Scream for your life 3]: hahahahaha
2005-10-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: That was good [~Crimson Angel~]
2005-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cnn news Reporter:The Turkeys have attacked again the vets later found after the turkeys killed a co-worker that they were being controled by a guy who calls himself [Sagacious Turkey],he has been arrested and charged with animal crulelity,murder,and being an idiot,he will serve 10 years in prison without paroll,and that is all for the 8:00 news.
2005-10-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: nice
2005-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cnn Reporter:Rest In Peace Misty1.
2005-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... only 10 years for murder...? ...*the gang of chickens burst in and drag the CNN Reporter into the streets*
2005-10-21 [Saint Dragon]: Man im soo fucking lost...
2005-10-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: me too.........but its funny
2005-10-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: coffee? or bunny?
2005-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Another cnn reporter:Hello Danny Procter here to report that Blair Banaster the reporter that did the story on [~Crimson Angel~] was killed by a gang of chickens witnesses say that they draged her into the street and beat her to death with a metal baseballbat the chickens were arrested and sent to animal control where they will be uthanized,the person who controlled the chickens is a man by the name of [Mortified Penguin] who told police he did it because he thought Ms. Blair was an idiot,he will serve life in prison without paroll.
2005-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *sclaps forehead*
2005-10-23 [esperanza]: O.O -stares-
2005-10-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh... so it's a staring contest you want?! *stares*
2005-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: White Wolf Singing Heaven's Song, Ronald Weasley, moon_fire, akiratetsuo, nc-17, garfield the cat, Gothic Vampire... hmm... interesting...
2005-10-25 [Saint Dragon]: I get the body
2005-10-25 [POG]: REVENGE REVENGE!!!! Ham sandwich
2005-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sleeps*
2005-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Wh- what?!
2005-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: For those of you paying attention on this wiki on 2004-12-07... I have good news! The termites are back from Iraq! *the termites swarm in*
2005-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... "Don't show usernames"... what does this button do...?
2005-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: im not on "happy crack" i just want some
2005-10-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: ummm may i be a waitress?
2005-10-26 [Saint Dragon]: I get the body...
2005-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure you can be the waitress! *chucks a crinkled old uniform with blood stains on it at you* ...here's your work clothes... and if anyone else wants a job... or another job, for that matter... they can be the Special Of The Day changer! ...there's actually one of those for everyday of the week, mind you... instead of just "Your guess is as good as ours..."
2005-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Backwash Soup
2005-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and frontwash...
2005-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah
2005-10-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: *puts on uniform*
2005-10-27 [Saint Dragon]: Lol anal leak stew...
2005-10-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: is that what you want? [Saint Dragon]
2005-10-27 [Saint Dragon]: not really i like good old fashioned pizza combo pizza ummmie...  I dont even know why im here
2005-10-27 [Saint Dragon]: hey did any of you ever watch cheers? if so.... I wanna be the norm of bob's
2005-10-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok "we need a combo pizza out here"
2005-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure... you be the "norm"... and I'll be the retired baseball star...
2005-10-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-10-28 [Saint Dragon]: ok
2005-10-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughes and grabs the pizza* here you go
2005-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh....*eats ramen*.....
2005-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: I want to be the short waitrees with black hair.
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you do that...
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: yay
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks head*
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: what??
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks head*
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kicks [Mortified Penguin]'s head*
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *lassoes your neck with the refrigerator's extension cord* ...bad monkey! BAD! *thwacks you with a newspaper*
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *startes crying*My Beautiful Edward Eliric dies!!whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: HA HA HAA!!! ...yes, yes... he's killed by Envy... but, however did thou know...?
2005-10-29 [Scream for your life 3]: BASTERD LEAVE HER ALONE OR DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know cause my cousin has that episode on his computer but it is japaneese.
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... riiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: it is man.
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh shut up.
2005-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...never!
2005-10-29 [Saint Dragon]: *eats pizza and watches the soap *
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Envy killed my beautiful Edward Eliric,He's an evil butthole!!
2005-10-29 [Saint Dragon]: a what?
2005-10-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Envy is not a girl,Envy is Edward Eliric's half brother.
2005-10-30 [Saint Dragon]: who?
2005-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Envy is the homunculus made after Hohenheim did human alchemy... but aaaaanyway... *the gang of chickens burst in and drag misty1 into the streets*
2005-10-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Edward Elric kills the gang of chickens and rescues Misty1 and kisses her*
2005-10-30 [Saint Dragon]: ...* turns off the tv* oh fullmetal..... (Mortified Penguin is now off) (Misty1 is now off)
2005-10-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: no i'm not!muhahahaha
2005-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of chickens use alchemy and kill Ed*
2005-10-31 [Saint Dragon]: .......... *uses ummm death alchemy? and trades Mortified Penguin life for ed's* who's ed?
2005-10-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes* haha
2005-11-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: EDWARD ELRIC IS THE SEXIEST CARTOON ALIVE!!!
2005-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Nuh uh! Opus the penguin is!
2005-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHO THE BLOODY HELL IS OPUS THE PENGUIN?!?!
2005-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2005-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: THAT,IS THE UGLIEST THING I HAVE EVER SEEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heeeeeey... isn't that what your mirror said...?
2005-11-02 [Saint Dragon]: Lmao actully the sexiest cartoon alive is *drum roll* What where the hell is that coming from?!?!?! (over it) the female 4 it la blue girl.. poor girl got rape by so many tentaculs...
2005-11-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: oh!!!! it's sooo cute
2005-11-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: i love the PENGUIN
2005-11-02 [TheEvilHat]: Newly Invented word!!! ookpoo!!
2005-11-02 [TheEvilHat]: pernunciation = oo-ck-pooh
2005-11-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: nice one
2005-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! ...I've "read" la blue girl!
2005-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *[~Crimson Angel~] starts to fade*
2005-11-02 [teddbear]: what about liquid ice?? France got away with selling us bottled water...
2005-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Is still fading*WHY AM I FADING?!?!
2005-11-02 [teddbear]: cause your being ignored mwahahahaha
2005-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *fades and reappears at [The Bad Turkey]'s house*ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2005-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... disturbing... *eats ramen*...
2005-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Attention, turkeys (yes... you!)... Whoever can get the most people to join Bob's Diner... wins... a... uh... cookie! ...and my recognition...
2005-11-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*is being chased by [The Bad Turkey] and is screaming*AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
2005-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... Was last seen 102 days ago.
2005-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2005-11-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh how cute.
2005-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]:  ...*twitch*... darn boredom!
2005-11-03 [Saint Dragon]: so how did you like it?
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: nice puppy *pets the puppy*
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: *bites puppies tail*
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: *puppy yelps*
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: Wasn't puppy tail on the menu this evening? lol
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: i dont think so
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: sowwie then. What about burnt matchstick, Can I eat that then??
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: no......they hurt....*gives you a slice of cake* how about this?
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: Is it chocolate?? or mint??
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: what do you like better?
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: I like both together better. Like andes mints *drools*
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok *hands you the cake*
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: *scarfs it down* how about some liquid ice to wash it down??
2005-11-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok*gives it to you* there you go
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: Ahh refreshing liquid Ice. Thx you. How much do I owe you??
2005-11-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: hehehe.
2005-11-03 [teddbear]: hahaha
2005-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: YEEEEEE KI KI KI KI KI
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *fart*
2005-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2005-11-04 [PhoenixStarfire]: damn i always come in at the worng time.
2005-11-04 [teddbear]: pull up a seat.
2005-11-04 [PhoenixStarfire]: i think im gonna
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...is there ever a right time...?
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *watches bobobo-bo bo-bobo whilst eating pizza*
2005-11-04 [PhoenixStarfire]: no but hows complaining?
2005-11-04 [teddbear]: It's always a right time when you got cash.
2005-11-04 [PhoenixStarfire]: well theres that too
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats hooker*... mmm... goooood... a little fuzzy though...
2005-11-04 [PhoenixStarfire]: lol
2005-11-04 [teddbear]: Finished with that hooker?? I love sloppy seconds.
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiight... *throws a hooker leg at you*...
2005-11-04 [teddbear]: Hmmm. Leg of hooker. *licks it like a lolliepop* blahh. Tastes like slut to me. I think you got jipped on this one.
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Eh... I had a coupon... it was a good deal... but not as good as that two-for-one deal that time! ...ah... gooooood tiiiiiiiimes...
2005-11-04 [teddbear]: Ahh, the power of coupons. the belief that we are getting more than we pay for it, without realing the lower quality served to us.
2005-11-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: [teddbear] what i gave you was free
2005-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I LOVE [Mortified Penguin]!!
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Disturbing... *eats ramen*...
2005-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: ARE YOU [The Bad Turkey] IN DISGUISE,CAUSE HE USED TO EAT RAMEN AND SAY RIIIIIIIIIIGHT... AL THE TIME?!?!
2005-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: He stole the ramen eating from me! ...*eats ramen*... *throws burning ramen on you*...
2005-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: hey!!*throws burning rocks at you*
2005-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ....... riiiiiiiiiiiiiiight..... turkey got banned, remember?...... *eats fo' shizny*........ I took a break of eating ramen...... too much starch........
2005-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-06 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: Why did he get banned?
2005-11-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: for being a jack ass! no i'm kidding i don't really know
2005-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...Turkey hears all...
2005-11-07 [~*~Tinkerbell~*~]: lol ok?
2005-11-07 [Saint Dragon]: i ate the turkey tho...
2005-11-07 [teddbear]: NOOO...... Turkey!!!
2005-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiight...
2005-11-07 [Saint Dragon]: sandwitches r fun
2005-11-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-08 [Saint Dragon]: mwhahaha *hears the turkey talking from his belly*
2005-11-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks at [Saint Dragon] funny* whats up with your tummy?
2005-11-08 [Saint Dragon]: i think it was some thing/one i ate...
2005-11-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2005-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, yo, yo, yo, Cup o' Joe!
2005-11-09 [Saint Dragon]: oh god No!!!!
2005-11-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: Help
2005-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -throws flaming turkey at penguin- take that!!
2005-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: wh- what?!
2005-11-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -throws another- heheh
2005-11-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: *runs and higes*
2005-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *the entire diner bursts into flames* ...darn it... that's the 7.53rd time that's happened this week...
2005-11-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: its ok
2005-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yall are fucking morons.
2005-11-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey be nice
2005-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: not you everybody else.
2005-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... riiiight...
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Especially [Mortified Penguin]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen* ...*points at a sign that reads: Don't feed the misty1*
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks sad*
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *is obligated to ask why* ...why art thou sad...?
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: you two are mean to each other
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...soooooo...? *the gang of chickens burst in and drag [~Crimson Angel~] (over broken glass) into the streets*...
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: never mind
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: DIE BASTURD DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: It's Bob's Diner, lady! ...What'd you expect?!
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know it is
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I am [The Bad Turkey], mind you... I'm on mort's name because... I was banned again! ...[Sagacious Turkey]...
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok then
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH,I miss Brent.
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: who?
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: My friend he moved,I have a present for you,[Mortified Penguin].
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: This is what happens to bad turkeys. 
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: so whats up?
2005-11-10 [Saint Dragon]: FOOD!!
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-10 [Fearathress]: *waks into the dinner and talkes a sit *
2005-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: *walks over to [Fearathress]* hello, Welcome to Bob's diner what would you like?
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks into the diner*Where's [Mortified Penguin]?
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: He's not here right now... may I take a message?
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: yes you are.
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiiiight...
2005-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: freak
2005-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*picks nose*... *wipes it on a plate*...
2005-11-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWw
2005-11-11 [Saint Dragon]: COOL!
2005-11-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: *runs away*
2005-11-11 [Saint Dragon]: *severs food to fearless on it*
2005-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: hmm... interesting...
2005-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yo mama happened to it!
2005-11-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh,what,I didn't say anything. 
2005-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiight... disturbing...
2005-11-14 [Saint Dragon]: OMG MICHEL JACKSON ALL OVER AGAIN!!! NOOOOOOOooooooooooooooOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!
2005-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Michael Jackson?! ...WHERE?! *hides*
2005-11-14 [Saint Dragon]: *is m.i.a*
2005-11-14 [Fearathress]: ah yes how about a quart of blood and cooked sushi please
2005-11-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: comeing right up *gets the quart of blood and cooked sushi* here
2005-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: You're too inexperienced... let me serve the customer... *chucks a bloody fish at [Fearathress]*
2005-11-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: im sorry i am
2005-11-15 [Saint Dragon]: NICE! i think i love you all!!
2005-11-15 [Fearathress]: lmfao nice mortified penguin i was right about this place lol
2005-11-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-15 [Fearathress]: lol u the only one on
2005-11-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: probly
2005-11-15 [Fearathress]: lol
2005-11-15 [Saint Dragon]: I didnt even know there was an a.m. still.....
2005-11-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: im bored
2005-11-16 [Saint Dragon]: Well there's a corner over there *points
2005-11-16 [~Elvin Enchantres~]: can i have cooked sushi
2005-11-16 [Saint Dragon]: *throws a refried octopus at [~Elvin Enchantres~]*
2005-11-16 [Saint Dragon]: Is that how its done?
2005-11-16 [Fearathress]: *looks at the octopus and chukles*
2005-11-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: yes [Saint Dragon] it is. *trows sushi at [~Elvin Enchantres~]
2005-11-16 [Saint Dragon]: sweet... i think i like ms white wolf..... its the who pizza thing
2005-11-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: (lol)
2005-11-16 [Saint Dragon]: i like pizza i have ask for pizza on pizza she just say "no, dewb....
2005-11-16 [Fearathress]: lmfao
2005-11-16 [Fearathress]: hey would any of u like to koin an army?
2005-11-16 [Saint Dragon]: what it made out of.....
2005-11-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: what kind of Army?
2005-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag [Fearathress], [Saint Dragon], and [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets... but not before ordering half a cracker! (they make a lot of money in the circus)*
2005-11-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: Hey that was so wrong
2005-11-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yep
2005-11-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2005-11-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: Fluffy the frogs been frog napped
2005-11-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH?!?
2005-11-17 [Saint Dragon]: *kills the chickens and makes a sandwitch*
2005-11-17 [Fearathress]: lmfao alrighty then *takes one and starts to defeather it* a pirate army we are going to war soon but check it out the evil pirate army
2005-11-17 [Saint Dragon]: im a blue rogue......
2005-11-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: forget about me joining
2005-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Pirates...? How cliché... and you even misspelled "pirate" on that wiki...
2005-11-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: *screams* whats with you all and pirates?
2005-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: "You all"?! ...be specific schlemiel...
2005-11-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: never mind
2005-11-18 [Fearathress]: lol i know tis funny was in a bad mood that day lol pirates are just fun to rp veari lmfao
2005-11-18 [Fearathress]: hey mortified penguin what would u do if someone started a war with the other diner?
2005-11-18 [Saint Dragon]: breed an army of fish chickens to fight back....
2005-11-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs* so whats up?
2005-11-18 [Saint Dragon]: looks like the sky...
2005-11-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yall are retared.
2005-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: A "war" would just be stupid... there's nothing you could do!
2005-11-19 [Kiche]: *trips out of the shadows, and lands flat on her face* ^_^;;; Hello! *gets up and brushes herself off* I'm ok! *raises her hand* I vote for the fish chickens!!!!
2005-11-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-20 [Saint Dragon]: cock fish!
2005-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... pussy cat...?
2005-11-20 [Saint Dragon]: P0RN!!!
2005-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! WHERE?!
2005-11-21 [Saint Dragon]: Pornqueen.net
2005-11-21 [Fearathress]: *looks down at her sis* what now u cant walk? lmfao
2005-11-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: *bites a friends finger* he said that hurt
2005-11-21 [Saint Dragon]: banana?
2005-11-21 [Fearathress]: was did i miss ans sazabi u are in the army i added your name
2005-11-21 [Saint Dragon]: Huh?
2005-11-21 [Revolution]: This is a weird wiki.
2005-11-21 [Saint Dragon]: *cock fishies bursts in thru the window and drags [Revolution] in to the street*
2005-11-21 [Revolution]: ...well, if I'm not welcome than...
2005-11-21 [Saint Dragon]: it more like it happens to every one
2005-11-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey it happened to me
2005-11-21 [Saint Dragon]: And me 2 times... *hears the toilet rumble*
2005-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag [Saint Dragon] and [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets* ...of course you're welcome here! *the pride of lions burst in and drag [Revolution] into a dark alleyway and perform surgery on him with a rusty knife* ...don't ask...
2005-11-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: *kicks a chickin* haha ((sorry))
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: *looks around and puul her sword killing 2 chikens in the proccses* so wtf do chikens what with us?
2005-11-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: i dont know
2005-11-22 [Saint Dragon]: *toilet burst open and frees the golden cock fish and they drag [Mortified Penguin] in to the sewers as a new breeding ground*
2005-11-22 [Revolution]: Like I said. wierd.
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: aye i aggre revolution
2005-11-22 [Saint Dragon]: remember that gold fish you flush when it died? well it remembers you
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: lmfao
2005-11-22 [Saint Dragon]: i dont get a bio on your army do i?
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: a what
2005-11-22 [Saint Dragon]: nvm *golden cock fishies drag [Fearathress] in to the sewers for "fun fun"*
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: great just what i needed to be in sewer muck lol *looks at it drawing a wand of possison out*
2005-11-22 [Saint Dragon]: *has cool fish on girl porno now*
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: what? lmfao
2005-11-22 [Saint Dragon]: MWhahaha! *sells it to a shut in nerds that need to know what a girl looks like*
2005-11-22 [Fearathress]: *points the wand at the fish and watches it turn into one of her minnions and watches it attack sazabi playfuly* time for fun
2005-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *the lions burst in and drag the chickens out of the diner........ you know they have avian flu....*.......... *eats ramen*....
2005-11-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: *cooks a turkey* who wants some?
2005-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I do! *munches on a drumstick*...... no, really, it's a drumstick! *plays drums*....
2005-11-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok what part do you want?
2005-11-22 [Gluttony]: ...I'll bet he wants the penis...
2005-11-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: nice
2005-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: i have ramen, pumkin cheese cake pie and doritos
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: ...riiiight...
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: im not fucking with you i raided my frige and cupboards for food
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: ...ramen is bad for you!
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: i love ramen
2005-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: ...don't we all...
2005-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: it has chunks of beef in it and chick chunks with fish!
2005-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: i hate fish...
2005-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: fish are my bane
2005-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: i mean there's hate then how i feel toword fish i mean i really Hate fish
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: *eats some chicken* ...man... this is the worst fish I've ever eaten... *continues eating chicken*...
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: wow umm COCK FISHIE!!!
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: PUSSY CAT!!!
2005-11-23 [Soroptimist]: I can talk on Bob's Diner! Because I haven't joined Pirates Palace! :D
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: Or... you know... you could just unjoin Pirates Palace!
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: *plays sad harmonica music as a troup of army ants bury one of their recently killed soldiers in the dust pile on the floor*
2005-11-23 [Soroptimist]: I haven't joined...so how could I unjoin?
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: ...as [nokaredes]... *starts playing the drums as the ants march against the termite stronghold*
2005-11-23 [Soroptimist]: I can't unjoin as [nokaredes]...didn't you read my description there? Also don't be so obvious! >_<
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: *picks nose* bah, I say... heh heh heh... "special job"...
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: ...you know, you could always allow me in our "secret wiki" with this name... *winkwink* *nudgenudge* *shoveshove* *beatwithclubbeatwithclub*
2005-11-23 [Soroptimist]: Except I'm not the owner from here...
2005-11-23 [Soroptimist]: "Dustin is satan death to dustin" XD
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a group of turkeys bust in and drag [Soroptimist] into the street and beat her with a stick*
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: im satan for 1 i have proof!
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: really? *looks for proof* where is it?
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: it over here im my pants! see *shows vearl* im horny!
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks* ooooooooooo nice..............so am i
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: congrate you might want to do some thing about that
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: im ganna
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: have Fun send me lots of pictures
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: what?
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: never mind
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: but i need those pics so i have something to sell to horny little shut in nerds! *looks at a few of the birds*
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: well i'll try
2005-11-23 [Saint Dragon]: yay cash for trevnor!
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: yep
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: "Dustin is satan death to dustin" ...what?! Who said that?!
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: it was [Soroptimist]. he is the one who got beat up by turkeys
2005-11-23 [Gluttony]: *smacks head*
2005-11-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: your welcome
2005-11-24 [Gluttony]: Howdy ther, pa'! ...is you gonna eats yer horny toad?
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: [Gluttony] who are you talking to?
2005-11-24 [Gluttony]: No person in particular...
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: what are ye zoing?
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: who me?
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: yes you.
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: im not doing anything
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: boo
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes misty*
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Please don't poke me.
2005-11-24 [Saint Dragon]: Poke or please?
2005-11-24 [Gluttony]: *pokes misty with a rusty needle*
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: why not [~Crimson Angel~]?
2005-11-24 [Gluttony]: *the gang of chickens burst in through the roof and order a round of poo stew*
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a group of turkeys bust in and and order a bunch of Sushi*
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: poke me again and you will find out!!
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes [~Crimson Angel~]* ok
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR*bites off all of [Fallen Child Athena]'s fingers and toes and locks her in a room with no windows*
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! get me out of here
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: MUHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: *walks though the wall* oh hi.....i forgot i could do that
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH SHIT!!!
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: i really did forget
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh well,just don't poke me again.
2005-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2005-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: thanks,happy thanksgiving.
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: *poke* hehe
2005-11-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: stop it
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: but it fun.... i like pokeing ppl.. *makes a stew out of the fingers*
2005-11-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwww
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: (in a demonic tone) You know u like pokeing ppl!
2005-11-25 [Gluttony]: *pokes misty with a shotgun*
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *ducks out of the way*
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: POKE ORGY!
2005-11-25 [Gluttony]: [~Crimson Angel~], post-processing is a bit of a pain, so I will not permit you to die within my jurisdiction...
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *another group of turkeys bust in and and order a bunch of Sushi*
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: but this my jurisdiction yours end 2 feet left of here o_O
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *takes the shotgun and shoots the turkeys* thank god
2005-11-25 [Gluttony]: What?! ...I find that offensive!
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: *cooks the turkey* who want thanks giving dinner!!??
2005-11-25 [weasel2]: why
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: im sorry[Gluttony], they think im thier master
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: *serves him out* should have turkey in your name on thanks giving
2005-11-25 [weasel2]: then we can have weasels day
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: why?
2005-11-25 [weasel2]: becuse that way the t-bird will be safe
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2005-11-25 [weasel2]: good
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: so how are you?
2005-11-25 [weasel2]: sore but ill live
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh....im sorry
2005-11-25 [weasel2]: thats ok im old you know
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: *eats a turkey Breast*
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *eats a chickin leg*
2005-11-25 [Gluttony]: *eats a cow rib*
2005-11-25 [Saint Dragon]: I like breasts...
2005-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs* nice one
2005-11-26 [Saint Dragon]: really , not to odvous?
2005-11-26 [Gluttony]: "odvous"...? "ODVOUS"!?
2005-11-26 [Saint Dragon]: yea odvous pick up a dictionnrereereeireirieireirieir(did this on perpoupur
2005-11-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs*
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: okay.*grabs a cross*STAY AWAY FARFARFAR AWAY FROM ME.
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks at [~Crimson Angel~] weird* oooooooooooook
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: dumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdumdum ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sigh*you are all werid
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know,isn't it wonderful?
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: yes
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: but i love you all just the same
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *snorts with laughter*
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: what?
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: nothing
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2005-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: some distant ghost like voice:HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII
2005-11-27 [Saint Dragon]: YOU NEED TO FIND A NEW WAY TO SEND ME BACK TO HELL THE OLD WAYS DONT WORK ANY MORE MWHAHAHAHAHA
2005-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughes*
2005-11-28 [Fearathress]: lol wtf is happining?
2005-11-28 [Saint Dragon]: moooooooooo i am the cow king!!!!
2005-11-28 [Revolution]: you guys talk too much.
2005-11-28 [Saint Dragon]: No it just you dont talk enuff by conpearasin
2005-11-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2005-11-28 [spitfire_35121]: ...I'm the vice manager! *beats random people with a chair*...
2005-11-29 [Saint Dragon]: no im pretter sure you are just the birds privet dancer
2005-11-29 [spitfire_35121]: ...nooo... the public dancer! *mutter mutter*...
2005-11-29 [spitfire_35121]: ...maze of guile!
2005-11-29 [spitfire_35121]: ...'cept the "Decide to find it yourself" part has nothing in it... someone can fill it out if they want to...
2005-11-29 [Fearathress]: lol *walks back in to the tavern sitting down and finish what is in her cup dogging the chair* so much agrasiveness
2005-11-29 [Saint Dragon]: dogging up? i was eaten by fishies! I HATE FISH! *beats rapes and whores off [spitfire_35121] ass*
2005-11-29 [Fearathress]: *watches amused* tiss the place for drama *atches at a gold fish comes up and kiss [Saint Dragon] tiss shouldnt say that lmfao
2005-11-29 [Saint Dragon]: tisk *beats rapes and ties up [Fearathress] *shouts* "5$ 5$ she love you long time 5$ 5$ she love you all nite 10$ 10$ she have you son"
2005-11-29 [Fearathress]: lol tish raped
2005-11-29 [Fearathress]: sorry but tis for sale for one man and one man only
2005-11-29 [Saint Dragon]: yea but see your tieded up so you dont get to pick at least here in the diner *severs every one a free bowl of ceral
2005-11-29 [spitfire_35121]: ...Where did that cereal come from?!
2005-11-29 [weasel2]: uuuu
2005-11-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: weird people rock!
2005-11-30 [spitfire_35121]: noooo... fraggle rock!
2005-11-30 [Saint Dragon]: id be more worried about the milk
2005-11-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: so would i
2005-11-30 [Saint Dragon]: thank Fearathress for the milk every one!
2005-11-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: what?
2005-11-30 [Saint Dragon]: you read me
2005-11-30 [spitfire_35121]: not really you, but the comment...
2005-12-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: what did i miss?
2005-12-01 [Fearathress]: ewww *struggles to get untied* ewwwwww
2005-12-01 [Saint Dragon]: Yes You have been milked fearathress
2005-12-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok *runs away
2005-12-01 [Saint Dragon]: Your! next!
2005-12-01 [Gluttony]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-12-01 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: Hey what do ya get for being the 100th member??
2005-12-01 [Gluttony]: A swift kick in the- er... I mean... an expensive meal! ...on the house!
2005-12-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles*
2005-12-02 [Saint Dragon]: Here have some milk
2005-12-02 [Fearathress]: *finnaly gets her hand losse after exhosting herself casting spells and gets up* no one milks me without permission first *snaps her fingers and watches sazabi and the milk in his hand fly out of the tavern and into the street*
2005-12-02 [Saint Dragon]: the ropes stop all magic you still tied up
2005-12-02 [Fearathress]: dam i hate you but u needed to specify that when u tied me up so really i am still out ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha
2005-12-02 [sara(:]: ...Has a point..
2005-12-02 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: oh no...... she's loose...... run for you life!!!!!!! * runs*
2005-12-02 [spitfire_35121]: Oh no you didn't! *pimp slaps [Fearathress]* ...It's a DINER! ...Not a tavern!!!
2005-12-02 [spitfire_35121]: ...besides... didn't you read the sign?! *points at sign on the wall that clearly states, "Anyone who uses magic to untie themselves will be promptly retied and sued for 1... million... pesos!"*
2005-12-03 [Saint Dragon]: so *reties fearathress with magic binding unbreakable ropes* and tickels her till she pees*
2005-12-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: *watches*
2005-12-05 [Fearathress]: dam looks at spitfire fine have it your way * jumps on her feet kicking sazabi in the balls* stop tickeling me damint
2005-12-05 [Saint Dragon]: but its so fun
2005-12-05 [spitfire_35121]: *points at three different signs saying, "No tickling." "No peeing." and... AND... "No breathing."* ...sheesh... doesn't anyone read these days...?
2005-12-05 [Saint Dragon]: *points to the sign that says dont listen to the other signs*
2005-12-06 [spitfire_35121]: *points at the sign saying, "Ignore that blasphemous sign!"*
2005-12-06 [Saint Dragon]: *points at the sign that say [spitfire_35121] is full of poo and to ignore him at all costs*
2005-12-06 [Fearathress]: lol u ppl are so wrong *hops out side and finds a sharp peice of metal and begns to cut the rope*
2005-12-06 [Saint Dragon]: *sicks his pet tentacule monster on fearathress*
2005-12-06 [spitfire_35121]: *points at the aforesaid sign*
2005-12-07 [Saint Dragon]: *ignores him*
2005-12-07 [Fearathress]: *looks around shaking her head* u ppls never give up do u well if i cant use magic to get out of the ripes than fine *sits down and meditates*
2005-12-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: *goes over to [Fearathress]* here *cuts rope* see no magic.....its called friends
2005-12-07 [Gluttony]: Friends?! ...oh yes... much more effective than magic...
2005-12-08 [Saint Dragon]: yea most the time
2005-12-08 [Fearathress]: ty veari *rups her wrists looking at thetentacule pet * *puts a hand on it wispering a few words and watches as it goes back to the material plane* ty
2005-12-09 [Saint Dragon]: rups?
2005-12-09 [Fearathress]: rubs* happy
2005-12-09 [Saint Dragon]: Ok thingy one anything i use/own/touch is unneffected by all magics....
2005-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ... five out of four children have a problem with fractions..
2005-12-11 [Gluttony]: ...if it's not one thing... it's your mother.
2005-12-11 [Saint Dragon]: you mean 5 out of 5....
2005-12-11 [Gluttony]:  ...the ultimate superhero team!
2005-12-11 [Saint Dragon]: where r the power rangers? and the pokemon!!!
2005-12-11 [Gluttony]: I was going to put some power rangers, but I couldn't find any... besides... digimon are better than pokemon!
2005-12-12 [Saint Dragon]: Not really Pokemon forever!!! blastiose will eat your soul
2005-12-12 [Gluttony]: What?!
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: I think Pokemon and Digimon rule the world! (they are better then Barbie.....right?)
2005-12-12 [teddbear]: Barbie can suck my nuts for all I care. lol
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs* ice
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs* nice
2005-12-12 [teddbear]: *big grin* hehe.
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: so whats up?
2005-12-12 [teddbear]: vry little gotta log off by 10:00 my time though. (which is 20 minutes away) Gotta get up for work in the morn.
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: where do you live?
2005-12-12 [teddbear]: Iowa, It says on my homepage.
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok.......sorry
2005-12-12 [teddbear]: And You are a Texan girl...
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: yes.......its boring down here.......my home town is Temple
2005-12-12 [teddbear]: I live in a small town called Story City. Even the name sounds small.
2005-12-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know
2005-12-12 [Gluttony]: yo yo yo yo, cup o' joe! What up?!
2005-12-12 [Saint Dragon]: I win im in alaska! in ketchikan :P
2005-12-12 [Fearathress]: what the shiznit i leave for the weekend and dam do u ppl have a life off of et?
2005-12-12 [Gluttony]: ...nope...
2005-12-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: not at all
2005-12-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ooookkkkk
2005-12-13 [Gluttony]: A'ight
2005-12-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: he
2005-12-13 [Gluttony]: she
2005-12-13 [Saint Dragon]: yea i do i have work but i work at an internet provider as maintance... sooo yea...
2005-12-13 [Fearathress]: lol well u have an excuse sazabi and the rest of u *shakes her head smileing* dont worry i dont have a life ether just on everquest lol
2005-12-13 [Gluttony]: ...so we noticed...
2005-12-13 [Fearathress]: lol
2005-12-14 [Saint Dragon]: evercrack
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol..........my life is on here...........more people talk to me\
2005-12-14 [Fearathress]: *slaps [Saint Dragon]* hwo rude lol i know how u feel veari tis the same for me on eq lol
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey at least we have people on here......right?
2005-12-14 [Fearathress]: aye that we do
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: yay...............people are nicer on here
2005-12-14 [Fearathress]: lol so what up?
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: nothin.....just Final Exams
2005-12-14 [Fearathress]: ah dont have those till next week lol
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol.....nice.............i dont have any today.............but i'm still at school
2005-12-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -walks in and sits down at the bar-
2005-12-14 [Gluttony]: I'm exempt from all my exams... but I'm taking them anyway... *the gang of chickens burst in, drag [Fallen Child Athena] and [Fearathress] into the streets, and beat them with random, blunt objects*...'tis the season for holiday beatings!
2005-12-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -tosses large rock at Barry-
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hits [Gluttony]* i agree
2005-12-14 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -chuckles-
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: what?
2005-12-14 [Gluttony]: *the pride of lions burst in and drag you both into a dark alleyway and perform brain surgery with their claws*
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: for Heaven sake man have you no pride in protecting a female? *beats you with a wet noodle*
2005-12-14 [Gluttony]: Nope... not even the least bit... in fact, I revel in the pain of females!
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: are you even human?
2005-12-14 [Gluttony]: ...nope... 's'all turkey, baby...
2005-12-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles* really?
2005-12-14 [Gluttony]: ...ye-uh... pure, rotten-to-the-core, heavily adulterated turkey... hence they call me... The Bad Turkey.
2005-12-14 [Saint Dragon]: wow....
2005-12-15 [Fearathress]: lol u ppl are abusive *fights hr way back to the tavern summoning her minnions* god i hate using them*put them on every male in the tavern*
2005-12-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -bashes turkey in the head with a stool- you ass, keep your trap shut -laughs sitting down again-
2005-12-15 [Saint Dragon]: *minnion unsummond* i told you any thing i touch is renderd magic proof...
2005-12-15 [Gluttony]: *pimp slaps white wolf*
2005-12-16 [Gluttony]: Barry cotter and the role playing game
2005-12-16 [Saint Dragon]: no
2005-12-16 [Fearathress]: dam u
2005-12-16 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -bites turkey's hand-
2005-12-16 [Fearathress]: *goes back to the cornnor putting a force field around her so no one can touch her and pulls out an unfinshed bow and starts to carve it*
2005-12-16 [Gluttony]: ...you do know I can get you all banned from here... as I was saying... Barry cotter and the role playing game...
2005-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-12-16 [Gluttony]: riiiiiiiight...
2005-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Some Distant ghostlike voice:DEAD ABOVE GROUND...
2005-12-17 [Gluttony]: uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2005-12-17 [Saint Dragon]: *Walks threw said force field and hugs fearthress*
2005-12-19 [Fearathress]: wtf?
2005-12-19 [Saint Dragon]: as i said magic no work on with me
2005-12-19 [Fearathress]: pathtic *hugs*
2005-12-19 [Gluttony]: ...just like your spelling...
2005-12-19 [Fearathress]: lol i know it is pathtic i cant spell to save my life lol tis just me
2005-12-19 [Gluttony]: And such an out dated idiom... tisk tisk...
2005-12-19 [Fearathress]: *roles her eyes* talking about spelling and grammer.......
2005-12-19 [Gluttony]: Translation: *Rolls her eyes* talking about spelling and grammar... (And that's only grammatical errors!)
2005-12-19 [Fearathress]: never mind
2005-12-20 [Gluttony]: Translation: Nevermind.
2005-12-20 [Saint Dragon]: Translation: "I am a turkey's asswipe talk to me"
2005-12-20 [Fearathress]: lol hey saz
2005-12-20 [Gluttony]: Translation: I'm jealous of the sexy turkey.
2005-12-20 [Fearathress]: lol she adamits it
2005-12-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles* haha
2005-12-20 [Fearathress]: lol
2005-12-20 [Fearathress]: hey veari
2005-12-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey
2005-12-20 [Fearathress]: what up in your world?
2005-12-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: the SKY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-12-20 [The Slave Queen]: the ceiling
2005-12-21 [Gluttony]: What up, G?! Not much here, fo!
2005-12-21 [Saint Dragon]: fo isnt that a female deer?
2005-12-21 [Fearathress]: lol *goes in and kiss sazabi bye and then hugs veari* i wont be back untill 9 of jan.
2005-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: DAMN,I MISSED ALOT!!
2005-12-22 [Gluttony]: No... "Doe" is a female deer... // Yeah... like your period...
2005-12-22 [Saint Dragon]: EwwwwWWWWWWWWwwwwww  thats just mean *is proud of you*
2005-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-12-24 [Gluttony]: ko
2005-12-25 [Saint Dragon]: knock out!
2005-12-25 [Gluttony]: tko!
2005-12-26 [Saint Dragon]: Technical Knock Out! (bad speller)
2005-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: ko
2005-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ??
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: ¿¿
2005-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: weird asshole.
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: ...uh huh... riiiight...
2005-12-28 [nokaredes]: Bob's Diner's changed so much!
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: ...Hey!!! ...there's something very wrong here!!! ...it's wednesday... the special should be changed...
2005-12-28 [nokaredes]: ...lazy bum...
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: Hey! ...I'm not a bum... that guy's a bum! *points at [Mortified Penguin]*...
2005-12-28 [Saint Dragon]: YOUR BOTH BUMS!
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: *pimp slaps you*
2005-12-28 [Saint Dragon]: *jap slaps back*
2005-12-28 [nokaredes]: ...poor Mortimer...to be a bum so early in his life...
2005-12-28 [Saint Dragon]: eh im over it
2005-12-28 [Gluttony]: ...jap...? ...JAP?!
2005-12-28 [nokaredes]: Thanks what he said...can't you read?
2005-12-29 [Saint Dragon]: wow... school failed you
2005-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wait,wasn't [Gluttony] at one time Barry Cotter?
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Not that I know of...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...yes... and he's also been known as... the bad turkey, garfield the cat, garfieldfoo!, Mr. Narrator, Intelligent, Sagacious Turkey, Egregious Turkey, Chagrined Turkey, Your Friendly Neighborhood Turkey, Till Danderfluff of Willowbottom, Cup o' Joe, Cup o' Tea, Kooh Estion Mark... and a bunch more I can't remember... (and occasionally Mortified Penguin, Sir Soapy, spitfire_35121, playa 101, light mage, kittie corpse, K_RO, and hellraiser)...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...And Mr. Influence...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Oh, do me! (not like that...>_>)
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...And Special Fred...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: Oh yes... I'll do you... uh... I can't remember many of yours... 'cept the ones me and Mortimer made fun of behind your back... More Than Stars, Tomorrow's really yesterday (something like that), Nokaredes, Hyper Harmonie (see other parentheses), Cardboard Socks...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...Deireadh (see other two parentheses)...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: O_o you made fun of me?
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: ...I'm going to blow up your houses <_<
2005-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: YOU WERE PLAYA 101?!
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: He means he knows playa 101's password.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: playa 101 is [Mortified Penguin]'s brother...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...more than cars... *Nelson laugh*
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Well I know that one >_>
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: Diarrhea...?
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Tomorrow's Really Yesterday, nokaredes, hyperharmonie and and Cardboard Socks?
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...uh huh... "the ol' harmonious one"...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: You know, if you add an extra o to this diner's name, it becomes x-rated >_>
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: Ick! ...You sick freak! ...What is wrong with you?! ..."Bob'so Diner"... for shame... *waggles finger*
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Well...you're the one who took the page <_<
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: I... uh... I don't know what you're talking about!
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: I think it's hilarious. I love being a sick freak lol. I love bob's dinero. Wait that just makes it currency, not porn.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...hey... where'd you come from...?
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...try adding the "o" in other places...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: I have 2 o's in my name already thank you very much.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...You're quite welcome! ...here... have a "half a cracker"... on the house! ...*throws it on some random house*...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: I did...but you haven't been...I got a lot of places first...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: free order if you can guess what movie my name is from...and go
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: But... it's my Diner! ...and it's a porn movie... isn't it...?
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: I have no clue.
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: Boobs aren't porn, just pleasure. hehehe
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...riiiiiiight... 'cept for the folks with boobaphobia...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...it's almost as crazy a phobia as that phobia where people are afraid of bunnies... uh huh...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: ohh, I'd hate to be one of them, especially if it was a girl with boobaphobia.
2005-12-30 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: you ass ypu *whispers it in you ear about what its about*
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: I like asses too. They are very pleasurable as well. lmao
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: Yeah, them donkeys...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: I don't like donkeys. A horse onced kicked a mule and it landed ontop of me.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: Darn mules... they're nothing but filthy half breeds... hey... wait... did you just say you didn't like donkeys because a horse kicked a mule on you?!
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: yeah, kinda ironic isn't it, especially if it were true.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...riiiiiiight... *eats ramen*...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: free order if you can guess what movie my name is from...and go
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...barney!
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: I'm getting deja vu.
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: EEhhh wrong answer bub. try again.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...teletubbies...?
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: eww gross. Try again. It's an actual GOOD movie. and not a show on tv.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...hmm... it has to be a porno then...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: uhm...I'm going to guess the movie Quid Pro Quo...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: not a porno at all. and My name isn't the name of the movie...This is the line from the movie. "Quid pro quo Agent Starling"
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...yeah... well... uh... guess where my name's from!
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: Bob the builder??
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...so close...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: Thomas the Tank Engine.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...getting warmer...
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: Damn those are the only two that I know of.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...in that case... *the pride of lions burst in and drag you into an alleyway, where they perform a vesectomy with a rusty spatula*
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: Well, I can't say that wouldn't hurt. *As the Spanish Inquisition barges in, clamps your nipples and testicles to 25 car batteries, and turns up the voltage*
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Silence of the Lambs! ...and Fullmetal Alchemist.
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: Since FA is a tv show...Silence of the Lambs. We have a winner. Here's is your complimentary liquid ice.
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: No, I meant FA for [Gluttony]...'cause he said to guess his name too :P
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: ahhh, I need to watch that more, I love that show but just don't remember names or anything like that.
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: I don't watch the show a lot. In fact, I watch so infrequently I claim to "never watch it". >_> I'm just good like that <_<
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: nice memory then.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: Hey! ...I thought they died out quite a while back...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: *coughgooglecough*
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: You think Runs googled a couple of lines to find them??
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: You thought who died...? And Google doesn't work for me and I can prove it.
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: I'm not the one looking for proof.
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: I know :P But here's some anyway http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a301/nokaredes/Random%20Hostingness/google.jpg It's a screenshot >_>
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: *smacks head*
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: *smacks your head*
2005-12-30 [teddbear]: I can't get to it, some virus problem.
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: ...did you screw my computer up?! :O
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: 
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...my google appears fine...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...hmm... I clicked search and it had 143,000 results...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: ...and I care...why?
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...because you're a loving, caring kinda person...?
2005-12-30 [Saint Dragon]: wow you need a life
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...I'm trying to buy a life off of eBay... but people keep outbidding me...
2005-12-30 [Saint Dragon]: it fun
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: No, not right now I'm not.
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: ...well... it is 3 in the morning... (not for me, though!)...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: erm...that's not why...considering the fact that I don't have school and slept until 4 yesterday afternoon...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: *pokes "Barry" in the eye*
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: I slept until five! ...*twitch*... AM... *twitch*...
2005-12-30 [nokaredes]: Why...? Do you have school or something...? I don't...but I have to babysit because all the public schools are out this week...tomorrow I have to be at this one job at 8am...which is early for me because I didn't even have to get up that early when school was in @_@ So I figure it's probably easier to just stay up 'til then...also ET's backup's about to start...
2005-12-30 [Gluttony]: No... we don't go back 'till the fifth... I spent the night at Mort's house... I made him sleep in a crappy bed, while I got his comfortable bed...
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: FUCK HEADS!!
2005-12-31 [Gluttony]: ...yes...? You called...?
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: YALL ARE SO FUCKING RETARED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2005-12-31 [twinrova]: yall?....
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: YES I'M A RED NECK SO GET OVER IT!!
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: You all better calm down before I throw my pop at you.
2005-12-31 [Gluttony]: ...more like... a slightly pink neck!
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: You'll throw pop at us?
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: Yeah, pop.
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: Yummy delicious pop. My favorite thing in the world.
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: That must be your favorite word.
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: nope,my favorite word is Boo.
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: Boogeta boogeta booo
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: HUH??
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: my Favorite way to say boo.
2005-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh.
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: [:-P
2005-12-31 [twinrova]: .....
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: Do I................confoose you?
2005-12-31 [twinrova]: hahah not really.... you guys just comment alot....
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: I'll comment you...Oh wait, it's not a bad thing...nvm. lol
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: God, Misty, turn off the caps lock. <_<;
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: God, quit saying God so much. jeezsh.
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: I only said it once.
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: Yeah... Well I said it twice. *does the happy dance*
2005-12-31 [twinrova]: ........?......heh
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: That's right heh...*munches on an old shoe*
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: *plays the harmonica*
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: *talking with food in my mouth* Play Blues Traveler!
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: uhh...okay! :D
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: *holds up a lighter* encore! *spitting food everywhere*
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: *takes a picture of you spitting food everywhere*
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: I want a copy of that.
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: Five bucks. *holds out her hand*
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: *bucks you with my head five times* So where's my copies??
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: You said one copy. >_> *hands it to you*
2005-12-31 [Gluttony]: Actually if we plug 12 into the variable "a" and take into consideration that he mispelled "copies" as "copy"... you owe him 12 copies!
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: I don't want to buck her anymore though...she's greedy.
2005-12-31 [Gluttony]: You already bucked her enough... don't worry... I'll be your lawyer! We's gonna sue you, pseudonym! *gallops off to the courts of elftown*
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: I see nothing new there...
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: I don't see anything new anywhere, maybe it's cause I ate the soup.
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: *is still eating Thanksgiving leftovers* <_<;
2005-12-31 [teddbear]: *is having Christmas tomorrow**and then New Years afterwards with other people*
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: I'm having Christmas (and my birthday) on Sunday :D And then I am babysitting the neighbors kids after that...
2005-12-31 [Saint Dragon]: i like bananas
2005-12-31 [nokaredes]: eew...too much information >_<
2005-12-31 [Gluttony]: i like cereal...
2005-12-31 [twinrova]: hhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmmmm count chocola....
2006-01-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-01-01 [twinrova]: hhhhmmmmm
2006-01-01 [Saint Dragon]: girls
2006-01-01 [twinrova]: hm?.... what.....
2006-01-02 [teddbear]: oolala
2006-01-02 [Saint Dragon]: me like girls
2006-01-03 [teddbear]: Me like curvy girls hehehe
2006-01-03 [Saint Dragon]: ok can can have rosie odonald
2006-01-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: I LIKE GUYS
2006-01-03 [Saint Dragon]: *pats veari on her soft little head*
2006-01-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks up* what was that for?
2006-01-04 [Gluttony]: *dumps acid on veari's head*
2006-01-04 [Saint Dragon]: *kicks barry's shien*
2006-01-04 [Gluttony]: ...shin...?
2006-01-04 [Saint Dragon]: THAT PART!
2006-01-04 [Saint Dragon]: There too!
2006-01-04 [Gluttony]: *scribbles your name down in his death note*... trampled to death by stampede of wild buggalo...
2006-01-04 [Saint Dragon]: *wakes up* MOO!!
2006-01-04 [Gluttony]: wh- what?!
2006-01-04 [Saint Dragon]: *Is a cow zombie* Qumoooooo Braimoooo Brainmooooooo
2006-01-04 [Gluttony]: ...now I'm disturbed...
2006-01-04 [twinrova]: *smiles and nods*.......
2006-01-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shows up and then leaves again*
2006-01-05 [Saint Dragon]: Mooo Mooo Brainsooo Moobrains!
2006-01-05 [teddbear]: Ahh, runaway! Madcow on te loose!
2006-01-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: *runs away*
2006-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-01-06 [twinrova]: exactly what i was thinking... i just go along with it
2006-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: As long as you don't go along with the cow, you'll be fine.
2006-01-06 [twinrova]: ....hmk good to know.........
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: [:-P yay
2006-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-01-06 [Saint Dragon]: *bite* Misty1 is now a cow zombie....
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: I told ya ta watch out for that thing.
2006-01-06 [Saint Dragon]: Qumooo
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: *runs away screraming at the top of my lungs* Hurry, fry em up and serve em for supper!!!
2006-01-06 [Saint Dragon]: *quid pro quo has been biten as have all chickens*
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: *sucks the poisen out*
2006-01-06 [Saint Dragon]: your still a zombie cow....
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: Not anymore *runs away screaming like a little girl*
2006-01-06 [Saint Dragon]: ...*Watches a zombie run and scream*
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: I always look like a zombie.
2006-01-06 [Saint Dragon]: well now you r one
2006-01-06 [twinrova]: ooohhh what now....
2006-01-06 [teddbear]: Or so I make you think.
2006-01-06 [Gluttony]: I, as quid pro quo's lawyer, see that as a threat! ...*sues Sazabi*...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Dude, I didn't know I could afford a lawyer. Shweet!
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...speaking of which... you own me 50,000... pesos!
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: I'll wire transfer...after you win the case.
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...cancel the pesos... just give candy... lots of candy... fifty bags! ...including gummy worms...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: NOT THE GUMMIES NOOOOO! I'll give you half of the gummies. Cause I gots a lots.
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...*drums fingers together*... all the gummies... *cackles maniacally*...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Fine, grabs my ONLY BAG OF WORMS and hands them over.
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...uh huh... riiiiiiight... *eats a worm*... I'm watching you... *suspiciously glances over his shoulder at quid*...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Get to work them, I didn't pay you to sit around and eat your wages.
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: I'm on it, I'm on it... I'm suing, I'm suing...
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: Time to do some usual lawyer stuff... *blackmails the judge*... *bribes the jury*...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Why didn't you just stack the jury in the first place??
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...how should I know...? ...ask Satan... he was the one telling me what to do...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Nonono, that's Santa you're talking to, not Satan.
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: well... that explains the sack of toys he kept whackin' me with...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: *hits you with a sack of shit* You deserve to be hit with that instead. *grabs my gummies back*
2006-01-07 [twinrova]: is that violence needed?
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Nope, but it was fun.
2006-01-07 [twinrova]: ok
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: [:-P
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag... me into the streets* Hey! Stop that! You traitorous bastards!
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: Ehh, take him away, he's no use to me anyway...
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: Wh- what?!
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: I already got my gummies back.
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: Yes... yes you did... *maniacal laughter*...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: *eating MY gummies*...
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...*still laughing maniacally*...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: *good thing I'm immune to all poisens and diseases*
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...still laughin' here, bub...
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: kk, what are you so cracked up about???
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...laughing gas... why do you ask?
2006-01-07 [teddbear]: ehh nvm then. Like I care. lol
2006-01-07 [Gluttony]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2006-01-07 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: urgh!!!!!! i can't find the banner page!!!!!! * Pulls out shotgun and gets on hunting gear* "Here banners page, banners page, banners page"
2006-01-07 [twinrova]: uuhh...................
2006-01-08 [Gluttony]: ...bob's badges...?
2006-01-08 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: ahhhhhhh...... thank you!
2006-01-08 [Gluttony]: ...I made that wiki too! ...Jr. didn't make any of this, mind you... all me... but he takes credit for it all...
2006-01-09 [Fearathress]: hello
2006-01-09 [Saint Dragon]: X-lax gummie bears...
2006-01-09 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: ewwwww.....
2006-01-10 [twinrova]: yeah thats pretty sick
2006-01-10 [Gluttony]: ...nah... *eats gummie bears*...
2006-01-10 [Saint Dragon]: enzite
2006-01-10 [Piercedskull]: yo wasup?
2006-01-10 [Fearathress]: nothin much skull
2006-01-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smakes you all* dont we have a job to do?
2006-01-11 [Gluttony]: ...jobs are for losers... *continues not doing his job*...
2006-01-11 [twinrova]: slacker...
2006-01-11 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: I have a job i'm the PUBLICIST so BOB'S DINER ROCKS
2006-01-12 [Gluttony]: Darn straight, mo' fo'! *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets... over a pile of broken glass and manure*...
2006-01-12 [Hello Sunshine]: .____.
2006-01-12 [Gluttony]: ...uh... heh heh... don't ask...
2006-01-12 [Saint Dragon]: I am the norm! *sits and drinks*
2006-01-12 [Gluttony]: And I am the iron lung! *eats ramen*
2006-01-12 [Meta Ridley]: hi
2006-01-12 [Fearathress]: lol hi [Meta Ridley] hey sazabi
2006-01-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a random person walks in and sits down*
2006-01-13 [twinrova]: some should probably help them.....
2006-01-13 [Saint Dragon]: OMG! its magicaled gurly!
2006-01-13 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-01-13 [~/xCurley x Jeffersonx\~]: Not commented here in....well.....ever.....so....boo
2006-01-13 [Gluttony]: Yo, yo... Asalaamu Aleikum...
2006-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: boo
2006-01-14 [Saint Dragon]: BOO..b
2006-01-14 [Gluttony]: blue
2006-01-16 [~/xCurley x Jeffersonx\~]: *runs and hides*
2006-01-16 [DarkAngel3]: Meh....I don't remember this page....
2006-01-16 [Gluttony]: Sure you do! *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets*
2006-01-16 [twinrova]: eh?
2006-01-16 [DarkAngel3]: Hmm....still not ringing any bells....ah well....seems this way with everything else.....*runs around throwing applesauce on every one*
2006-01-16 [~/xCurley x Jeffersonx\~]: *walks in* It was like that when I got here!
2006-01-16 [DarkAngel3]: .....right.....
2006-01-16 [Gluttony]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2006-01-17 [Saint Dragon]: *throws cock gold chicken fish around screaming "it's alive its alive"*
2006-01-17 [Fearathress]: *throws an alive golden fish at [Saint Dragon]* it coming to get u lmfao
2006-01-17 [Rolo]: i don't comment here because you don't comment on roholio kingdom, that's my excuse i'm sticking to it, now order me some damned zombie brain pie :D
2006-01-17 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-01-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hits you all with a chicken*
2006-01-17 [Gluttony]: ...we're fresh out of zombies...
2006-01-17 [Gluttony]: ...but we've got some nice undead lemon meringue!
2006-01-17 [twinrova]: eeeeewwwwwwwwwwww....... how icky......
2006-01-18 [Saint Dragon]: *s&ms veari*
2006-01-18 [Fearathress]: ewwwwwwwwwwww chicken *takes the chicken and burns it*
2006-01-19 [Inept]: woooooh this might be the best wiki of eternity :) hehehehehe i loooooove you BOB
2006-01-19 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-01-19 [Gluttony]: ...indeed...
2006-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...*eats ramen*...
2006-01-19 [Gluttony]: ...*pimp slaps you*... *steals your ramen*...
2006-01-19 [twinrova]: ?....*stares*.....*drinks coffee*.....
2006-01-20 [The Slave Queen]: oo, i want coffee!
2006-01-20 [Gluttony]: *dumps burning coffee on you*
2006-01-20 [Saint Dragon]: *force feeds shou tucker human anus leakings*
2006-01-20 [Gluttony]: ...is force really needed...? *eats poo stew*
2006-01-20 [Fearathress]: eww lol
2006-01-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol nice
2006-01-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-01-21 [PixieStickChick]: OMMMMGGGGG!!!!! You ho's are still alive *stares*
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...WHAT?!
2006-01-21 [PixieStickChick]: YES
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...riiiiiight...
2006-01-21 [PixieStickChick]: shush you *make the fry gremlins eat your toes*
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...that's the third time that's happened this week, actually... *the gang of chickens burst in and drag you into the streets*
2006-01-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH PLEASE!!
2006-01-21 [PixieStickChick]: *goes all ninja on the chickens and wins the battle*
2006-01-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Please visit my new wiki called Funny Animal And Cute Pictures.
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: *sends more chickens to assault you*
2006-01-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: The assault of the ebola strain virus, Ebola Zaire, can wipe nations off the map! ...*eats ramen*...
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...mmm... Ebola flavored ramen...
2006-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Unfortunately, the only proven, still-existing cells are frozen in Massachussetts... *eats ramen* ...*sends Ebola Zaire to France*...
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...and they're keeping the virus alive... WHY?!
2006-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: So's theys can examine it and test it on lab animals to find a cure. So far, it kills all animals the same way... even turkies! One of its many characteristics is the liquification of the liver, heart, heck, everything except bones and skeletal muscles! ... *eats ramen* ...
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...I wonder if PETA knows of this... and it's "turkeys", stupid! ...check your messages...
2006-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: It's "turkies", you filander! I don't even know what that meant... it's a randomn word I pulled out of my mind... *eats ramen*... PETA knows about it. The virus is contained in biosafety level 4 biohazard room, or commonly slanged, "hot zone".
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: haha told you it was a good book!!!!!
2006-01-21 [Gluttony]: ...suuuure you did... and no... it's TURKEYS!!! ...and it's "random", "philander", and there's no such words as "biosafety" or "slanged"...
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: omg dustin about how manyt names DO you have??
2006-01-21 [spitfire_35121]: ...lots... 'cept this one's technically David's...
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: sure it is... gee, and i thought I had alot...
2006-01-21 [spitfire_35121]: ...uh huh... riiiiight... *eats ramen*... *does six sit-ups*...
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: *eats ramen*...*does six push ups* One...Two...three...
2006-01-21 [spitfire_35121]: ...Sit-ups... SIT-UPS!
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: push-ups...PUSH-UPS!!!
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: *eats ramen*
2006-01-21 [spitfire_35121]: *pimp slaps you* ...sit-ups! *steals your ramen*
2006-01-21 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: *biotch slaps you* ...push-ups!! *steals ramen back before Dustin ate it*
2006-01-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sneaks up behind [Blvd. of broken dreams] and yells BOO* BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-01-22 [Saint Dragon]: I want a sex kitten...
2006-01-23 [Lethan]: dont we all.
2006-01-23 [Fearathress]: eww sazabi eww
2006-01-23 [Lethan]: and how
2006-01-23 [Fearathress]: how on what?
2006-01-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: right?
2006-01-23 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: *SCREAMS* AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-01-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooookkkkk>?
2006-01-23 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: [~Crimson Angel~] scared me!!!!!!!!!
2006-01-23 [nokaredes]: ...[Gluttony] is banned.
2006-01-24 [Saint Dragon]: Who?
2006-01-24 [nokaredes]: [Gluttony]...he was...the owner guy...of this wiki...
2006-01-24 [Saint Dragon]: that fucking bird got him self baned! that shit brain... not the 1st time...
2006-01-24 [nokaredes]: ...nope...more like...5th? But the Guards say they're not giving him any more chances...
2006-01-24 [Saint Dragon]: LMAO!!!!!
2006-01-24 [Fearathress]: dam why did he get banded?
2006-01-24 [nokaredes]: He was annoying the Guards...with too many stupid comments on official wikis :)
2006-01-24 [Fearathress]: ah i understand just wandering *sits back pulling out her jornal and recoding the days events*
2006-01-24 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: lol dam dustin can't stay out of trouble can he?
2006-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, that stupid, idiotic nutcase... shame...
2006-01-24 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: lol
2006-01-25 [werewolf grrrrl]: hi
2006-01-25 [Saint Dragon]: *takes the hornal and resites the "juicie" things to every one*
2006-01-25 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: HI BACK
2006-01-26 [Lethan]: who's got a high back?
2006-01-26 [Saint Dragon]: any one over 7 feet tall
2006-01-26 [Lethan]: thats deep philosiphy.
2006-01-26 [Saint Dragon]: Your not very smart are you?
2006-01-26 [Lethan]: no. i have a negative IQ.
2006-01-26 [Saint Dragon]: ok like the bird....
2006-01-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: oooooooooooook?
2006-01-26 [Fearathress]: that is what i said
2006-01-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: well im smart
2006-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Ahem* In case you people haven't noticed, I'm the owner and leader of Bob's Diner... that is all... *eats ramen*... and just to flaunt my intelligence, I have an i.q. of 142... pretty high for a 15-year-old, I know.. you don't have to congratulate me on my achievements...... Jus' kiddin'! I'm "normal" like the rest of you...
2006-01-27 [twinrova]: heh i bet you still get your lunch money stolen by older kids....
2006-01-27 [nokaredes]: *gives Mortimer a suspicious look*
2006-01-27 [Lethan]: does anyone have a spatula? i seem to have something amazingly undescribable on my foot
2006-01-27 [Saint Dragon]: Bird you forgot the - part of that
2006-01-27 [Fearathress]: ?_?
2006-01-27 [Lethan]: yo!
2006-01-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: ?
2006-01-27 [werewolf grrrrl]: ??
2006-01-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: im lost again
2006-01-28 [Saint Dragon]: he said it 147 well it -147 the doctor is still wondering how he breaths
2006-01-28 [Lethan]: with my face, duh.
2006-01-28 [~/xCurley x Jeffersonx\~]: Thats a wee bit mean is it not?
2006-01-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: ?????????????
2006-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Where do you people come from? (Don't you dare give me the birds-and-bees talk...)
2006-01-28 [nokaredes]: Don't ask us questions you already know the answer to...
2006-01-29 [Fallen Child Athena]: [Mortified Penguin] i Come From Texas
2006-01-29 [DarkAngel3]: My boyfriend is from Texas...
2006-01-29 [Saint Dragon]: I came from under a rock.....
2006-01-29 [Lethan]: me too. althought it was more like a boulder
2006-01-29 [Elinore]: i was found under the gooseberry bush
2006-01-29 [teddbear]: this one tastes like shnozberries
2006-01-29 [twinrova]: hhmmm shnozberries
2006-01-30 [Lethan]: who could have forseen that?
2006-01-30 [Saint Dragon]: shnauzle pop
2006-01-30 [Lethan]: *backs away slowly*
2006-01-31 [An Eversor and Ender]: *drinks Shnauzle pop*.....texas..hmmm... i think im tired, i dont even have random thougts about it. ill just say its a nice place and call it good.
2006-01-31 [Saint Dragon]: EWW EWW EWWW EWWW!!!! He drank cow cum!!!!!
2006-01-31 [nokaredes]: Here's hoping he didn't milk it himself...
2006-01-31 [Lethan]: *backs away even more*
2006-01-31 [Fearathress]: I am so lost.
2006-01-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: *backs away*
2006-01-31 [Fearathress]: 0o
2006-01-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Everyone please take my new poll and ask your friends to do the same,it is very important that you do so. 
2006-01-31 [*Leric*]: nobody wants to take your poll Misty. :p
2006-01-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: are you stalking me??
2006-02-01 [DarkAngel3]: APPLES!
2006-02-01 [Saint Dragon]: yes i am!
2006-02-01 [nokaredes]: I think we're gonna scare [Lethan] off...<_<  http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5430343841227974645
2006-02-01 [Saint Dragon]: i wanna scar misty tho...
2006-02-01 [nokaredes]: Misty doesn't scare o_O
2006-02-01 [Saint Dragon]: i can do it
2006-02-01 [Fearathress]: how?
2006-02-01 [Lethan]: *runs in a cloud of supremly accumulated terror and disgust of all mankind*
2006-02-02 [nokaredes]: It's not Friday...shouldn't someone change the special?
2006-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever,no one can scare me or scar me.
2006-02-02 [nokaredes]: ...they can scar you...all they need is something really horrible...
2006-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: only gibson cash can scare me.
2006-02-02 [nokaredes]: *becomes gibson cash*
2006-02-02 [Saint Dragon]: oh trust me love, if i could meet you in person id scare you
2006-02-02 [nokaredes]: ...but you can't. o_o
2006-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,only the real Gibson Cash can scare me.
2006-02-02 [TheEvilHat]: Why would anyone scare anyone? I dont understand why people get scared in the first place by things... maybe they dont understand it? but they shouldnt be scared of it.. it doesnt make any sence
2006-02-02 [TheEvilHat]: Im cornfused
2006-02-02 [TheEvilHat]: hey, do they serve corn here?
2006-02-02 [TheEvilHat]: Corn is good.
2006-02-02 [TheEvilHat]: so is pie, i like pie.
2006-02-02 [TheEvilHat]: and whats with the name Usagi? It sounds like someone is asking if you are soggy or something.
2006-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have a brusie,but i don't know how it got there.
2006-02-03 [Saint Dragon]: Sorry.... i didnt know you'd get hurt....
2006-02-03 [Lethan]: yo.
2006-02-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: It is not from you.
2006-02-04 [DarkAngel3]: I saw people fly today....O.o
2006-02-04 [nokaredes]: ...Well...as long as they weren't pigs...'cause then I'd be in trouble. :\
2006-02-04 [DarkAngel3]: hmm...I don't think they were pigs...
2006-02-04 [Saint Dragon]: so would i id have to married a whore...
2006-02-04 [Lethan]: Flying pigs? Damn. i lost that bet. now i have to eat a urinal cake.
2006-02-04 [DarkAngel3]: NO!!..ther were People not pigs!...I'd eat the pig first and not tell any one...
2006-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-02-05 [DarkAngel3]: ^__^
2006-02-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles*
2006-02-09 [Lethan]: *backflips on to a pile of rusty sandwitches*
2006-02-09 [nokaredes]: Sandwiches don't rust...well, ok, maybe here they do. >_>
2006-02-09 [Lethan]: i wouldnt touch the ham. (unless you want it to crawl up your arm, delve into your body and make a cocoon in your brain)
2006-02-09 [nokaredes]: Nah...been there, done that. The shots for that are a pain.
2006-02-09 [Saint Dragon]: moo
2006-02-09 [Lethan]: yes...yes indeed
2006-02-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: MOOOOOOO
2006-02-09 [twinrova]: excatly
2006-02-10 [Lethan]: quite the so.
2006-02-10 [DarkAngel3]: Quack, too?
2006-02-10 [twinrova]: eh?
2006-02-10 [Lethan]: duck. menu. quack.
2006-02-10 [twinrova]: eh? meow? :3
2006-02-10 [Saint Dragon]: *ARF*
2006-02-10 [Lethan]: *seconds the arf*
2006-02-10 [nokaredes]: Your watcher's number sure did go down since I was one of the staff...
2006-02-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: *thirds the ARF*
2006-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-02-11 [twinrova]: i think the best option for that is smile and nod
2006-02-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-02-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: *look around*
2006-02-13 [An Eversor and Ender]: *fourths the ARF*
2006-02-13 [twinrova]: eh?
2006-02-13 [Saint Dragon]: The arfs have it! tomarrow roast cat is the specail
2006-02-14 [DarkAngel3]: KENZI! I'm surprised at you!...And I would like the wonderful roast brain please...
2006-02-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-02-15 [DarkAngel3]: ^__^
2006-02-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sigh*
2006-02-16 [Saint Dragon]: moo
2006-02-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol\
2006-02-17 [Lethan]: Spleen?
2006-02-17 [Saint Dragon]: COLEN!
2006-02-17 [DarkAngel3]: KIDNEY!
2006-02-18 [Saint Dragon]: TESTEY
2006-02-18 [Lethan]: Gall Bladder!
2006-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-02-19 [Saint Dragon]: UTERUS!
2006-02-19 [Lethan]: and these will be on the new menu?
2006-02-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: OVERY?
2006-02-20 [Saint Dragon]: Birth canal! and as soon as i can spell them right
2006-02-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: ATTENTION!!!!!!! TESTICALS!!!! THAT IS ALL!!!!!!!!!!
2006-02-21 [The midnight wolf]: *flying monkeys come in and hit everyone with bannanas* HAHAHHA! *laughs evily*
2006-02-21 [Saint Dragon]: we know what you want
2006-02-21 [Lethan]: and its certainly what i dont.
2006-02-21 [Fearathress]: hey midnight
2006-02-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: *fades away into the darkness*
2006-02-21 [twinrova]: .....
2006-02-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: what?
2006-02-22 [twinrova]: eh? i didnt say anything...
2006-02-22 [Saint Dragon]: BANANANANANNA
2006-02-22 [Lethan]: you said dot dot dot dot dot. its clearly and painfully obvious
2006-02-22 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-02-22 [Piercedskull]: HI?
2006-02-23 [twinrova]: hey there...
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: *blinks twice*How are you?
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: FISH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hits skull with a tuna*
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: OWWW!!*rubs head*Why'd you hit me with a tuna?
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: be glad. i ran out of king salmon...
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: *twitch*Im a wolf....not a common HOUSE CAT!!!*burns the tuna and walks away&
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: MESA WANT A LIVE PIG!!*hides 1 hundred dollars in hand*
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: dont know much about wolfs then.....
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: ......We prefer deer caribou moose pigs and cows....Not fish..
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: actully my PURE BREED Grey wolf Go after salmon left and right
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: .....You making fun of me cause I'm a mutt arent you?
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: No becuse you a stupid kid.... -Chicks burst threw the door and drag [Piercedskull] dont in to the toilett- *flushes the toilet*
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: *sits in a tree and laughs*HAHAHAHAH!It always makes me laugh when ppl fall for my clones!Look whos stupid now?
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: i didnt fall for it magic of any kind doesnt work with me RP denid! your in the toilett
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: Rp?Magic?No.Thats a clone.I built her.And right now I have my laptop with me in a tree.And no im not im a toilet.
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: -watches the chickens return and drag off all [Piercedskull] in to the toilett-
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: Stop draggin my clone into the toilet!!You guna mess up her system!
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: your in around me only fact thing can exsit clone not real not there chicken real there toiletts real there see how it works?
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: ....I dont know what you just said.But Im staying in this tree!An dwhy do you want to put me in a toilett!?Whats your problem with me?And clones can exist!She is a robot.
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: robots dont exist with enuff persision to trick other ppl.... trust me i should know..... *turkeys fly in to the tree and poo on the laptop*
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: *shoots the turkey and cleans laptop*What is your problem?And yes robots can exist.Do you know how many people helped me make her?
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: it cant, humans cant write a ai script stron enuff to handle the hard wear, i KNOW trust me its my job to know
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: I dont trust you!It would be impossible not to beable to make a robot!It took 345 people plus me to make her!And it took 5 years!
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: It wont work i get 1.7 million monthly to design a automated Poilce officer and my model cant go up stairs holding it weopon right and open a door with out a soft wear crash and she doesnt have legs.
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: We ll then you suck at making robots.
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: I make hard wear..... i dont do the soft wear bull fine send me Picture and chart of how it looks human And stays upright....
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: I will once my comp starts dam working right!*hits laptop8
2006-02-23 [Saint Dragon]: sure....
2006-02-23 [Piercedskull]: *rols eyes*Whats the point in even talking to you?
2006-02-23 [Fearathress]: hello skull
2006-02-23 [The midnight wolf]: *punces everyone left and right* you all be nice to eachother!
2006-02-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: *Rubber ducks run in and kill me*
2006-02-24 [DarkAngel3]: I did not!
2006-02-24 [twinrova]: eh?
2006-02-24 [DarkAngel3]: I'm a rubber Duckie...
2006-02-24 [twinrova]: uh... good to know...
2006-02-24 [DarkAngel3]: ^_______^
2006-02-24 [twinrova]: ahah i like to make pie ...
2006-02-24 [Piercedskull]: Hi.*watches them*
2006-02-24 [Saint Dragon]: Make me be nice!
2006-02-24 [Piercedskull]: Oh shut up...
2006-02-24 [Saint Dragon]: Make me! huh HUh HUH!?!?!? now what Nothing thats what XP
2006-02-24 [Piercedskull]: *rollseyes*
2006-02-24 [Fearathress]: wtf?! now sazabi be nice well be as nice as you posibly can manage and hello midnight wolf are you stalking me?
2006-02-24 [Lethan]: it seems everyone has a stalker but me..
2006-02-24 [Piercedskull]: *rolls eyes*
2006-02-24 [Fearathress]: lol i dont want one you can have mine lol
2006-02-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: i dont have a stlaker yet
2006-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-02-25 [Piercedskull]: *twitch*
2006-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-02-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: i want a stalker
2006-02-25 [Saint Dragon]: I would but my g/f would get mad
2006-02-25 [Lethan]: I should set up a 'stalkers for hire shop'
2006-02-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: may i stalk you [Saint Dragon]?
2006-02-25 [Saint Dragon]: If you want? im rather boring tho...
2006-02-25 [twinrova]: hm?... usally you dont ask to stalk.. you just kinda do it
2006-02-25 [Saint Dragon]: i know...
2006-02-25 [twinrova]: hm....> _ > ok
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: its ok tho she's a she and there are some WEIRD girls
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: *growls*
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: See! there 1 Now!
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: *rolls eyes and walks away*
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: *points*
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: I hate you..
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: Good it's what im here for XP
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: *glares*
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: IM NOT HERE TO BE LOVED BO.......GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: *ignores*
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: Ok im over you your boreing me now *wonders off*
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: Finaly..
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: Why do you keep talking? it makes you sound stupid...
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: hm?Oh.I didnt notice you were still alive.
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: You suck at life it should quit you!
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: Life likes me.Besides.Your the one who sucks at life
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: Shut up nobody loves you they all lie! to use you!
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: .Nope.lots of people love me.
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: No there lieing to you to get what there want!
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: *looks at nails*Hm?Did you say something?
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. .. . .. .. . . . . ... . .. ... .. ... ...... ... . . .. . . . . . . . .. . . . . . ... ... . .. .. .. .. . . .... ... . .. . .. . . . .
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: weirddo...
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: Im over you like mcdonals
2006-02-26 [Piercedskull]: ehh?
2006-02-26 [Saint Dragon]: -Points left and looks right-
2006-02-26 [twinrova]: hm
2006-02-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: *stalks [Saint Dragon]*
2006-02-26 [Lethan]: V \/ v
2006-02-27 [Saint Dragon]: *feels stalked*
2006-02-27 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: How long is today? because today'd special has been tacos for a while! lol
2006-02-27 [Saint Dragon]: The fucking brids got banned
2006-02-27 [Lethan]: but its always today. *Jumps into taco and has an adventure*
2006-02-27 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-02-28 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: hmm... i can always ask him to make another name, he goes to my school, 7th period has turned into turkey hell lol
2006-02-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: kool
2006-02-28 [Saint Dragon]: omg im sorry for you
2006-02-28 [Fearathress]: cool
2006-02-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-03-01 [DarkAngel3]: My fridge mooed at me...is that normal?
2006-03-01 [Saint Dragon]: Yes... Hey i have worms.... inside of me!
2006-03-01 [DarkAngel3]: ........o.O
2006-03-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: no thats not normal [DarkAngel3]
2006-03-01 [DarkAngel3]: mmkay...Now I shall call the exterminator....
2006-03-01 [Saint Dragon]: lol
2006-03-01 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-03-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: no just call a butcher
2006-03-01 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: "wow creepy [DarkAngel3]'s frige has a ghost, let me go see if mine does" *runs to look in fridge, ghost with a knife jumps out at her and stabs her* " No get back in there you evil demon" * runs back* "Nope Nothing There" * whistles innocently*
2006-03-01 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: lol
2006-03-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol...nice
2006-03-02 [Fearathress]: lol that was something new. I acctualy live with a ghost!
2006-03-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: so do i
2006-03-02 [Lethan]: I went to the cinema with mine.
2006-03-02 [Fearathress]: lol noi realy do live with one she was murderd in the house accross from me and is out to kill all men or so the story goes of why she is still in the street.
2006-03-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: wow
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: i live with 2 ghost
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: REALLY?!
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: no i live with 4 now
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: really??
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea..i had 2 and my soon to be husband has 2 and we live together
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,cool
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: yep
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: :-)
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: what?
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: nothing
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2006-03-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep.
2006-03-03 [Fearathress]: cool
2006-03-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2006-03-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-03-04 [Saint Dragon]: BOOB WHERE!?! I WANT TO SEE!!!
2006-03-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-03-04 [werewolf grrrrl]: hi
2006-03-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I said Boo.
2006-03-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2006-03-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-03-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: *poke*
2006-03-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: no poking.
2006-03-05 [Saint Dragon]: Aww!
2006-03-05 [Lethan]: no....poking....?
2006-03-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: why not?
2006-03-06 [Saint Dragon]: Poking couses pre-teen pregnices
2006-03-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: well it might i dont know.....lets find out
2006-03-06 [Fearathress]: rofl!!! Hi wearwolf grrrl! =)
2006-03-07 [Saint Dragon]: moo
2006-03-07 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-03-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes [Saint Dragon]*
2006-03-07 [Fearathress]: *pooks [Fallen Child Athena]*
2006-03-07 [ally]: *pokes [Fearathress]
2006-03-08 [Saint Dragon]: -pokes ally-
2006-03-08 [Saint Dragon]: -pokes [ally]-
2006-03-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes you in the forehead*
2006-03-08 [Fearathress]: * pokes everyone* 
2006-03-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes back*
2006-03-09 [Lethan]: *pokes a random hobo in the eye.*
2006-03-09 [Saint Dragon]: -Poke Veari's ass-
2006-03-09 [Fearathress]: rofl
2006-03-10 [Saint Dragon]: i think i win
2006-03-10 [Fearathress]: *she shakes her head still laughing* come on veari get him back!!
2006-03-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: dont make poke you in private! ;) [Saint Dragon]
2006-03-10 [Fearathress]: no you didnt win yet saz!!! *starts to cheer "Dot it!! Do it!!"
2006-03-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: well i have to do it in private
2006-03-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2006-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea?
2006-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: how are you?
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: im ok
2006-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2006-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: boo
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: *jumps*
2006-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: haha
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: not funny
2006-03-11 [Saint Dragon]: BRING IT!!!
2006-03-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok i will
2006-03-12 [Saint Dragon]: Ok -waits-
2006-03-12 [Lethan]: *backs away slowly*
2006-03-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: brb
2006-03-13 [Saint Dragon]: nothing happend i win
2006-03-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: no you didnt
2006-03-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I miss [Sagacious Turkey]
2006-03-15 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...believe me, lady... he ain't missin' you.
2006-03-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: as do i [~Crimson Angel~]
2006-03-15 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...ha ha haa...
2006-03-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: what?
2006-03-15 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...uh... the name "turkey"? ...what kind of a name is that?!
2006-03-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: i like it
2006-03-15 [Saint Dragon]: I hated the birds....
2006-03-15 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...Mort shall hear of this treason!
2006-03-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: thats nice
2006-03-15 [Saint Dragon]: i dont care they all know i hate the stupid birds there all stupid and i hate them becouse they all gone got dem selfs Banned
2006-03-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: its ok
2006-03-15 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...[Mortified Penguin] isn't banned...
2006-03-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: point being?
2006-03-16 [DarkAngel3]: >.<
2006-03-16 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...sazabi... you've never much liked the "birds", have you...? What are your thoughts on them...?
2006-03-16 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...ah... the nobel potatoe... some pronounce it 'puh-tay-tow'... some pronounce it 'puh-tah-tow'... others pronounce it ''tater'!
2006-03-16 [The Bad Turkey²]: *the gang of chickens burst in and order a round of "Big, huge, throbbing, hot, juicy... breadsticks!"*
2006-03-16 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...throbbing breadsticks?! ...disturbing! *sticks thumb up*
2006-03-16 [Saint Dragon]: bird spread the flu the wars are over who get to carve the turkey this year
2006-03-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm?
2006-03-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: HITLER WAS A PENGUIN!
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...Hitler's always fun...
2006-03-17 [nokaredes]: Somebody changed the special...!
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...Why, thank you mi amore!
2006-03-17 [nokaredes]: ...I should read the previous comments...*is lazy*...
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: *whacks you with bamboo*... stop being lazy!
2006-03-17 [nokaredes]: ...never!
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...I would whack you again, but I'm too lazy...
2006-03-17 [nokaredes]: ...you better not whack me again...*shakes half a fist*...
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: *pokes you*
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...half a fist?!
2006-03-17 [nokaredes]: ...do you really want to know? ...poke me where? o_O
2006-03-17 [Saint Dragon]: in the bum bum!!
2006-03-17 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...quiet, you!
2006-03-17 [nokaredes]: ...so you're agreeing then, "D.."?
2006-03-17 [The Color Megan]: my leg itches.
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...uh... maybe... *scratches your leg with a pitchfork*...
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: ...pitchfork?
2006-03-18 [la vie lemon]: are we allowed to talk here again? O.o
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I HATE YOU [The Bad Turkey²]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: Why do you hate [The Bad Turkey²]?
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...sure... ha ha!
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Because he sent me a message and told me to go to this wiki I followed his instructions and left a comment and the told me to fucking leave.
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: The empty wiki...? xD
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: no
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...uh... Misty...? ...feel free to leave that wiki anytime...
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I did
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: ...it's legal for women to go around topless in New York!
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...*moves to New York*...
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: oooooooooooooooookkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: ...we should get an appartment together, "[The Bad Turkey²]"...
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...hmm... I'd planned on living in a mansion, but... ok!
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...ok...? OK?! ...ooooh... ok...
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: ...why's Misty1 saying ok to everything we say? o_O
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ok
2006-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *SIGH*
2006-03-18 [nokaredes]: ...that was a big sigh, Misty1...if I cared, I'd ask...but since I don't...and am lazy...*goes to sleep*...
2006-03-18 [The Bad Turkey²]: ok
2006-03-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: whats wrong [~Crimson Angel~]? at least i care
2006-03-19 [nokaredes]: ...that's just what you want us to believe!
2006-03-19 [The Bad Turkey²]: maze of guile
2006-03-19 [nokaredes]: ...been there, done that.
2006-03-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm sad. *sigh*
2006-03-19 [nokaredes]: Why...? /// ...would anyone like to add "hot dog ashes" to the menu?
2006-03-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: no
2006-03-19 [nokaredes]: ...and why are we sad, Misty1?
2006-03-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: yes why?
2006-03-19 [Saint Dragon]: Becouse a Wild banana ate her gold fish
2006-03-19 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...again?!
2006-03-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: omg
2006-03-19 [The Bad Turkey²]: Yes? You called?
2006-03-19 [nokaredes]: ...Chickyboo's boyfriend says the same thing in response to "omg"...creepy...
2006-03-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: sorry[D..:] your not GOD
2006-03-20 [nokaredes]: ..."dorry"? That fish was so cute on Finding Nemo! :D
2006-03-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: i ment to say sorry
2006-03-20 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...Don't make me smite you! ...*deep fries Dorry*...
2006-03-20 [nokaredes]: You can't deep fry Dory, Dory's already dead. :P
2006-03-20 [nokaredes]: This wiki is getting so disorganized, people keep adding things in odd places XD
2006-03-20 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...sicko!
2006-03-20 [nokaredes]: What?!
2006-03-20 [Saint Dragon]: Can i Kill D... D YOUR LETTER STANDS FOR DUCK YOUR A FUCKING BIRD TOO!!!
2006-03-20 [Fearathress]: hey all i back!!!!
2006-03-20 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...not really... but I am Turkey! *sticks thumb up*... *eats ramen*... *takes candy from a baby*...
2006-03-20 [Fearathress]: ....lol
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: You are aware that there are Guards watching this wiki, right D? o_O
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...feh... the ones that are already know...
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: oooooooooook
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: I like moon pies...^______^ Had my first one today...
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: Death to moon pies!
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a gang of Penguins run in and drag off [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets and hit her with a bloody stick*
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: *the gang of chickens burst out and drag [Fallen Child Athena] back in*... *the pride of lions burst in and drag [Fallen Child Athena] back out into the streets*...
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...and what exactly was the point of that?
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: nice *polar bears drag me back in and pin me to a wall*
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: *floor gremlins sell you as "fresh meat" to a herd of nomadic cannibals*
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: yay i less member for Elftown, Elfpack, Musmakers
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...*pets a floor gremlin*...
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: *dies*
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: *points and laughs*
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: *my soul takes my body away*
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...mmm... spirt...
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: ..you mean Sprite? o_O
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: no
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: Spirt! ...offbrand...
2006-03-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: soul
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: Chuck Norris' beard has a representative in Congress...!
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...the kind of music religious, deep voiced, african americans sing?
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...oh, just ignore me then...
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...fine! ...if you insist...
2006-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...I'll stop commenting then!
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...uh... er... yo mama!
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: Oh! I served you!
2006-03-21 [Saint Dragon]: Shut up you fucking bird
2006-03-21 [The Bad Turkey²]: Ah... stuff it in yer ear, you old goat!
2006-03-21 [Saint Dragon]: I am not a goat i DONT eat alot of things
2006-03-21 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: poo
2006-03-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: alrighty then
2006-03-22 [The Bad Turkey²]: ...indeed... poo is quite great...
2006-03-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: anyway
2006-03-22 [The Bad Turkey²]: Maze of Guile! ...Expansion!
2006-03-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok ok
2006-03-22 [The Bad Turkey²]: OK?! ...yo mama!
2006-03-23 [Saint Dragon]: FUCKING TURKEY!!! -go's mad and beats the meat-
2006-03-23 [The Bad Turkey²]: "beats the meat" it says...
2006-03-24 [Saint Dragon]: DIED I HATE BIRDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-03-24 [Fearathress]: i thought you hated fish!!!!???
2006-03-24 [The Bad Turkey³]: ...'orrible, this... quite 'orrible indeed... what's the world coming to, if they won't even let a poor defenseless turkey on a website...
2006-03-24 [The Bad Turkey³]: Oh, and... *crams a breadstick up [Saint Dragon]*...
2006-03-24 [The Bad Turkey³]: ...Baker Street! *plays saxophone*
2006-03-24 [The Bad Turkey³]: And to the 65... HOLY CRAP! THERE'S SIXTY-FIVE?! ...members that are watching this page... don't forget... I'm watching you.
2006-03-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Marcus Kirby is the most annoying person ever.
2006-03-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: then start watching me [The Bad Turkey³].......i watch this hell hole
2006-03-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: Hi! My name is Marcus... Marcus Kirby...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: Some random person picked me up and threw me over their shoulder....should I sue?
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: did you like it?
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: No...
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: then SUE HIS ASS!!
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: Mmmkay....just needed a second opinion....
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: Don't make me sue yo ass!
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: >.<
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: or kick him iin the nuts..... i think its funny when a chick kicks a guy in the nuts... unless its happening to me :/
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: Tehee....I've found out who it was.....I know where he lives......I plan on killing him in his sleep with a candy cane.....
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: no murder is too good! rape him! with a candy cane >;)
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ........he's too used to it.........I'm being attacked by an eye tick....
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: picture it tho! a candied ass rapie
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: You would be surprised at what else has been up there.....
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: i dont know iv had to pull some weird shit out of my bro's ass.... man his girl is freaky and not in a good way..
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: >.<.....a stick, a pool stick....inflated pool toy....pencils....candy....I think there was an incident with a hammer and a screwdriver last semester...
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: ...you're all disturbing me... which is why we have chickens! *they burst in and drag you over glass into the freeway*...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: BE AFRAID!.....I have a spatula....
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: i have you beat the stick end of a plunger, a bull horn, a "Toy" a POWER DRILL and a ballon....
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: *eats a spatula*
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: *blinks*Cheese?
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: I'll cheese you! *gets shotgun*
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: TREE! *runs away*
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: -mew?-
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: *chops it down*... how do these keep growing in the kitchen?!
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: ...Mew's a pokemon...
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: -plants another tree- I dont know?
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: *chops... you down*
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: >.< that was a fad when I was in third grade...I'm in ninth now....
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: ..."fad" it says, preciousss... yesss...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ..............
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: I NEEDED THAT FOR GIRL MONKEY HOOKER!!!
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: Uh huh... well... see you! *rides a pteradactyl into the sunset*...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: You are a hooker?
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: I hate birds...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: Man apples....
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: *runs in* *pimp slaps sazabi* *runs off*
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: -glomps Angel-
2006-03-25 [Mary had a little lamb]: Hey!
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: @.@
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: -Rawr!-
2006-03-25 [Tizurkey]: ...interesting...
2006-03-25 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...yes... quite...
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: g2g2
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ......
2006-03-25 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: You're all banned from elftown!
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ...why?
2006-03-25 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: ...because... I am Hedda! And I have spoken!
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ........
2006-03-25 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: ...*eats ramen*...
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: well umm hedda2 FUCK YOU GOD DAMN BIRD
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ..........bird?
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: is the bad turkey he changed his name
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: I realize this....
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: I HATE THE BIRDS!!!
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ...then kill it....
2006-03-25 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: Shizzle ma' pizzle, bizzles!
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: i cant .... this is the internet...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: .........idiot...
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: what?
2006-03-25 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: ...riiiiiiight... *eats Rice Crispies*...
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: I always do what the Rice Crispies tell me to...
2006-03-25 [Saint Dragon]: Wow thats umm -runs-
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ....^__^
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: ...Snap, crackle, and pop...?
2006-03-25 [DarkAngel3]: ....mostly......
2006-03-25 [The Bad Turkey³]: 
2006-03-26 [nokaredes]: ...*pours coherency on the wiki*...
2006-03-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles*
2006-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool,i'll take your poll.
2006-03-26 [Saint Dragon]: Both of you
2006-03-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: i want coffee
2006-03-27 [nokaredes]: I want people to stop trying to get in my pants.
2006-03-27 [nokaredes]: Trade ya...
2006-03-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: [nokaredes] trade me what?
2006-03-27 [nokaredes]: Everyone can tell you that you have a great body, and say they want to have sex, and I can be the one who wants coffee ^_^ Fair?
2006-03-27 [Saint Dragon]: well give them a pair of your pants and let them have all the fun they want?
2006-03-27 [twinrova]: eeeehhhhhhhhh?
2006-03-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: [nokaredes] no thanks
2006-03-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pukes all over [The Bad Turkey]*
2006-03-31 [nokaredes]: ...*points and laughs*...
2006-03-31 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-03-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs*
2006-03-31 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *opens fire on everyone... with a gun!*
2006-04-01 [nokaredes]: ...what else would you open fire with?
2006-04-01 [Saint Dragon]: his part
2006-04-02 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...a lighter, maybe?
2006-04-02 [DarkAngel3]: I want a lighter...I'm freezing....
2006-04-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-04-03 [Fearathress]: lol *opens fire back*
2006-04-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: *grabs a lighter and some liquer and trows it on the diner*
2006-04-03 [Fearathress]: lol Go Veari!!1
2006-04-03 [General Jelly Jiggler]: What?! That's the third time it's burnt down! ...This week! ...and it's only Monday!
2006-04-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-04-07 [Saint Dragon]: DAMNED BIRD!!!
2006-04-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...yeeesssss?
2006-04-07 [Saint Dragon]: I THOUGHT YOU DIED!!
2006-04-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: *ebuilds the diner and burns it down again*
2006-04-07 [Fearathress]: *Helps veari*
2006-04-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...*sues you all*... *wins, but somehow ends up $7,000 in debt*...
2006-04-07 [Saint Dragon]: ack... -digs a hole and starts serving worm stew-
2006-04-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: how did you end up in debt [General Jelly Jiggler]?
2006-04-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...ramen stocks went down! That's how! ...*eats ramen*... a record 113%! ...*eats more ramen*...
2006-04-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2006-04-09 [twinrova]: *smiles and nods*
2006-04-09 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Whoever nominates this, shall win a special prize to put in their house!  ...Nominate a Picture... go... now... prize awaits you...
2006-04-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: kk
2006-04-10 [Saint Dragon]: . > . > . no....
2006-04-11 [Fearathress]: k
2006-04-11 [Saint Dragon]: Fish ant eat the sun...
2006-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ....you stupid,stupid idiots.... I should ban you all! ......*eats ramen*.........
2006-04-12 [nokaredes]: Mortimer! How dare you be offline for a month!
2006-04-12 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...more than a month, actually... *eats diced penguin ramen*...
2006-04-12 [nokaredes]: ...go on msn...*whines*
2006-04-12 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...whiner!
2006-04-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool
2006-04-12 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...why, yes... yes I am...
2006-04-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-04-12 [Saint Dragon]: who is not on msn
2006-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha! [Saint Dragon] sucks! ....*throws tomatoes at "it"*.........
2006-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: .....*eats diced reminder message ramen*.....Great flavor! ....tastes like viagra.....
2006-04-12 [The Scarlet Pumpernickle]: Hey message no spaming to get your art on the front page..that's really not the idea you know.
2006-04-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I miss Brent.
2006-04-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Cram it up your (anal cavity), you filthy patroller... Your kind ain't welcome here! ...unless you're retired (or corrupt)... like the harmonious one... *spams*... Maze of Guile! ...Barry cotter and the sorcerer's bone! ...and nominate that picture while you're at it...
2006-04-13 [nokaredes]: Who the heck is Brent?!
2006-04-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Her gay lover?
2006-04-13 [Saint Dragon]: ME!
2006-04-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...you're misty's gay lover?!
2006-04-13 [Saint Dragon]: Yes
2006-04-13 [twinrova]: hm
2006-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ......where do all of you come from?!?! .....*eats ramen*.....Loopy loo! ........*throws viagra around*......
2006-04-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-04-14 [Saint Dragon]: i dont need that i need something to keep it down...
2006-04-14 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *hands you a glass of freshly squeezed kitten juice*...
2006-04-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,I'm scared.*runs and hinds in the corner*
2006-04-15 [DarkAngel3]: *attackes evil cookies* How dare they....
2006-04-15 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiiight... *eats ramen*...
2006-04-15 [DarkAngel3]: *attacks an apple*
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...JIMMY!!! NOOOOO!!!
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: This is Lisa...not Jimmy...I ate Jimmy two weeks ago....
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: AAAARGH!!! ...*sings a lament to Jimmy... in D minor*...
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: *screaches*
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *sings louder*
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: *pokes reminder*
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *deflates*
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: *pokes the deflated reminder* do you come in blue?
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...no... only red, green, and purple... *deflates even further*
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: I'll take you home in purple...you'll match my room...^_^
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...hooray?
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: You should be happy...I'll even keep the rats away....
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...r- rats?!
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...turkeys eat rats... *nodnod*...
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: ^-_^....I'll even put you on a shelf so they can't reach you....
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...hazzah...
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: Reminder?...You aren't a Turkey anymore....you are a Message.....
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...I'm a turkey in an envelope...
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: ><'
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: how dare you?....In front of the children?
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Children?!
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: Not any more....I ate them....
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...that's nice... *puts gun away*...
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: Apple?
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Pear?
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: No thank you....I'm full up on children...
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...not even a honey glazed kitten? *prods you with skewer*
2006-04-16 [DarkAngel3]: *pokes with a candy cane* If you like the way your arms are now, I suggest you don't ask me again*
2006-04-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...not even a honey glazed kitten?!
2006-04-16 [Saint Dragon]: Wow ppl iv never seen...
2006-04-18 [nokaredes]: *waves a cattleprod*
2006-04-18 [Saint Dragon]: -slams you but with a eletric cattlepod-
2006-04-18 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...no! Not the cattleprod!
2006-04-18 [General Jelly Jiggler]:         uh huh        
2006-04-19 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...hey, dinglehoppers... The Unofficial Elftown News...
2006-04-19 [nokaredes]: ..."dinglehoppers"?
2006-04-19 [Saint Dragon]: Dick toucher
2006-04-19 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...what?!
2006-04-19 [nokaredes]: I've never touched a dick, and I've only ever seen two! So there!
2006-04-20 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...I've never seen any genitals! ...other than my own... and the ones on the internet... and TV... and movies...
2006-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: who wants some marcus kirby road kill.
2006-04-20 [General Jelly Jiggler]: NOOO!!! ...not Marcus Kirby! ...your boyfriend!
2006-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwww gross he is so not my boyfriend.
2006-04-20 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...suuuuure he's not...
2006-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: he isn't.
2006-04-20 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...uh huh... riiiiight...
2006-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a boyfriend.
2006-04-20 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...ha ha! You're lonely!
2006-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,I'm not.Go here Misty1's friends
2006-04-20 [Saint Dragon]: moo
2006-04-20 [nokaredes]: Is that supposed to show us how many friends you have? Because I can take pictures of random people at my school, and claim they're my friends...
2006-04-20 [nokaredes]: *is going to do that to piss off Chickyboo*
2006-04-21 [Saint Dragon]: Lol
2006-04-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,they are my real friend,and that football guy doesn't go to my school,i knew him in the 5th grade.
2006-04-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: HELLO
2006-04-22 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...? ...?!
2006-04-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: hi
2006-04-22 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...?!?!
2006-04-22 [nokaredes]: Hi!
2006-04-22 [nokaredes]: http://fun.drno.de/flash/majick6.swf
2006-04-22 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...*eats ramen*... it takes away all of the cards!
2006-04-22 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...silly Allie... Tricks® are for kids! *takes Tricks®*
2006-04-22 [Saint Dragon]: Im a rainbow
2006-04-22 [nokaredes]: ...not the same kind...sorry...
2006-04-22 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...duuuuuuuuuuuude... sweeeeeeet... *eats RAMEN?!*
2006-04-22 [Saint Dragon]: If i bend over and sqeeze real hard do you think i can shoot a rainbow in your eye
2006-04-22 [nokaredes]: I dislike the way this conversation is going...
2006-04-22 [Saint Dragon]: Why?
2006-04-22 [nokaredes]: It's gross...
2006-04-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yall are retarded.
2006-04-22 [nokaredes]: *orders the lions to drag Sazabi and Misty1 into the street* *they don't listen* -_-;
2006-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Stabs the lion with my 9 feet sword.
2006-04-23 [Saint Dragon]: Put that back in your pants!!!
2006-04-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *the gang of chickens burst in and drag... the corn supply away!* ...hey! Frickin' chickens! *they burst back in and drag me into the streets*...
2006-04-24 [nokaredes]: They must not know your new name...
2006-04-24 [Saint Dragon]: I still hate birds....
2006-04-24 [nokaredes]: Head mechanic? o_O That would imply that you're not the only one!
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...say whaaaat?
2006-04-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a gang of penguins bust in and drag [Saint Dragon] into the streets*
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *points at the fine print on the No Unauthorized Gangs Act (of 1846... B.C.)* ..."Thou shalt not have any other gangs before thee, other than those permissed by thine lord, [Sagacious Turkey] or otherwise thine local drunkard, [Mortified Penguin]..." It goes on to say, "...None o' them gangs, nigga'!" And continues further in the twentieth paragraph, "...don't eat the turkeys, yo, or you be all like, oh snap, son! Dem turkeys done got eat! Oh! Ye-uh! And you gone an gets the indigestion..." *nodnod*
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...that's soooome fine print...
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...and furthermore... *a gang of vicious ho-eating tarantullas burst in and drag [Saint Dragon] into the streets*
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...and how that last quote found it's way into the No Unauthorized Gangs Act, is beyond me... not that far beyond me... just slightly... almost in reach, even...
2006-04-24 [nokaredes]: ...I think it's graffitti!
2006-04-24 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...now I'm considering writing a long "Bob's Diner Bible"...
2006-04-25 [Omega Zeon]: *transforms into a super saiyan*
2006-04-25 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *hurls apple at you* ...it'll keep the doctor away! MWA HA HAA!!! *shoots apples at random people*
2006-04-25 [nokaredes]: Bob's Diner Bible...? B-but...what about the regular Bibles? Won't they get mad?!
2006-04-25 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...what are they going to do about it?! Flip their pages at me?!
2006-04-25 [nokaredes]: ...they'll tell your God on you! (My God wouldn't care)
2006-04-25 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...do you have a legitimate religion?!
2006-04-25 [nokaredes]: ...depends...define "legitimate"...
2006-04-25 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...chocolatey... or, in some countries, lumpy...
2006-04-25 [Saint Dragon]: Im male
2006-04-25 [dark starlight]: oh come on dustin i wanna be a stripper. lol. jk.
2006-04-25 [Fearathress]: lol
2006-04-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: i wanna be a stripper
2006-04-25 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...feel free to add yourselves...
2006-04-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sits down- Well power to ya Veari...maybe you could get a job here -smirks-
2006-04-26 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...well... you haven't been here in a while...
2006-04-26 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: hey don, sir dusty dumplin britches!!!!!!!
2006-04-26 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...Mr., mind you...
2006-04-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles*
2006-04-26 [nokaredes]: How long do you all think I can stay awake (in a row)...?
2006-04-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: 2 minutes tops
2006-04-26 [nokaredes]: *has beaten that*
2006-04-26 [nokaredes]: You know, in Maryland, I can be declared legally (temporarily) insane if I stay awake 72 or more hours in a row...
2006-04-26 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...go for it, ya looney.
2006-04-26 [nokaredes]: *offended noise* (...and don't say "offensive noise*"!)
2006-04-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: DAMN,I need to get on more.
2006-04-27 [nokaredes]: ...nah...
2006-04-27 [Saint Dragon]: Yep
2006-04-27 [nokaredes]: I'm at 50 now...*drinks coffee*
2006-04-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Please go to [Misty1's animal cruelty pics@wik] it is very important that you do,so please go there.
2006-04-28 [Saint Dragon]: Misty1's animal cruelty pics?
2006-04-28 [nokaredes]: I've been there.
2006-04-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: im going there
2006-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: yes please,sorry i forgot the last i.
2006-04-28 [DarkAngel3]: I want a koala....
2006-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-04-28 [DarkAngel3]: ......Purple apple plans...
2006-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-04-29 [nokaredes]: Okay? Okay?!
2006-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh??
2006-04-29 [nokaredes]: [Shooting Star Shadow] (I've got a turkey now woohoo)
2006-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool
2006-04-29 [Saint Dragon]: Moo
2006-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oink
2006-04-29 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...ha ha... pig.
2006-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh please.
2006-04-30 [Saint Dragon]: Misty is nice! Veari is the mean one
2006-04-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: watching smirking-
2006-05-01 [Saint Dragon]: She hit on me
2006-05-01 [nokaredes]: ...and that's mean...how?
2006-05-01 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...hey, [Saint Dragon]... want a piece of this turkey? *winks*
2006-05-02 [nokaredes]: ...*slighty offended*...
2006-05-02 [Saint Dragon]: I fucking hate birds...
2006-05-02 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *cough* ...aaanyway...
2006-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,thanks [Saint Dragon].
2006-05-03 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Quiet, you! Did I tell you that you could breath?!
2006-05-03 [twinrova]: ?
2006-05-03 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...exactly.
2006-05-03 [Saint Dragon]: Fuck you Bacon
2006-05-03 [nokaredes]: ...did you ever tell her not to breathe?
2006-05-03 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...don't make me come through this computer screen...
2006-05-03 [nokaredes]: I'd like to see you try!
2006-05-03 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...It's on! *runs at computer*... *gets skull fracture*... I'll just... uh... send a stongly worded letter...
2006-05-04 [Saint Dragon]: No wonder your pissing bacon chris
2006-05-04 [nokaredes]: You girl.
2006-05-04 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...hmm... I think there was a misreading in the name...
2006-05-04 [nokaredes]: I think so too...
2006-05-04 [General Jelly Jiggler]: You would think, wouldn't you...
2006-05-04 [nokaredes]: More than you do!
2006-05-04 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...who... little old me...?
2006-05-04 [nokaredes]: Are you admitting to being..."little"? >_>
2006-05-04 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...who... big old me...?
2006-05-05 [nokaredes]: Ah, so you're admitting to being "big" then?
2006-05-05 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...who... medium sized old me...?
2006-05-05 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...what?! Quotes on "big"?!
2006-05-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-05-05 [nokaredes]: Misty says "ok" to everything...
2006-05-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: no i don't.
2006-05-05 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ok
2006-05-05 [Saint Dragon]: Yes you do!
2006-05-05 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: you guys are akward o.O
2006-05-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO I DON'T!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-05-06 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...uh huh!
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: uh.... do i need to seperate you two?
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *peeks in then runs*
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: eh?
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: << >>
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: ...... e__e
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: @.@
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: e____e i need coffee
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i need... something
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: coffee
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: infact i need alot of stuff... its kinda pathetic actually... considering what the things at the top of the list are
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: oi...
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: but... those are my problems not yours. so what else is new?
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: nah nothing...
2006-05-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: like usual huh?
2006-05-06 [twinrova]: yup
2006-05-06 [Saint Dragon]: Sex drugs and rock and roll?
2006-05-06 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *hurls a pot of flaming coffee at twinrova*
2006-05-07 [nokaredes]: ...should that coffee be flaming? o_o Coffee doesn't normally flame...right?
2006-05-07 [twinrova]: ....yeah no, throwing flaming coffee doesnt excatly help jackass
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...help...? ...help what...? *throws another flaming pot of coffee*... 'tis just a hobby of mine...
2006-05-07 [twinrova]: *throws flaming coffee* you wanna fight punk?
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...flaming... coffee? Do you realize how stupid that sounds...? ...ah, well... kids and their imaginations... How delightfully droll! *chortles obnoxiously*
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *smokes corncob pipe* ...hmm... can't get champagne on my new suit... yes, this diner is quite a lucrative business...
2006-05-07 [twinrova]: ........... O_o wow............
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: What are you wowing at?! *hurls flaming coffee*
2006-05-07 [Saint Dragon]: -Hurls flamming armadilos-
2006-05-07 [nokaredes]: ...well...this makes me happy that I can't get burned...
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *stuffs you in the freezer*
2006-05-07 [nokaredes]: *does well in cold* *uses the time to learn how to knit*
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...say hi to the knitter-eating meat loaf for me!
2006-05-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: bagle
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...I'll bay your gull...
2006-05-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.O?
2006-05-07 [nokaredes]: ..."hi!"...*it ignores*...
2006-05-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *randomly waves hi to rainbow and wonders how she should preceive the last comment*
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...hmm... he must have freezer burn...
2006-05-07 [nokaredes]: He must!
2006-05-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *bursts into song* whatcha gonna do with all that ass all that inside them jeans? Ima gonna make you scream make scream.Whatcha gonna do with all that breast all that breast inside that shirt? Ima gonna make you work make you work work make you work. - Cause of my humps my humps my humps my hump. My lovely lady lumps.
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *the gang of singing critics burst in and drag Gothic Yoshie into the streets*
2006-05-07 [nokaredes]: I hate that song. -_-
2006-05-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a gang of penguins bust in and drag [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets*
2006-05-07 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *the pride of lions burst in and drag the gang of penguins into the alleyway*
2006-05-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *a gan g of umpa lumpas devour you all*
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...somethin' like that happened to me once! ...the best of bob: volume 1...
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: Umpa lumpas wouldn't eat me. I'd taste bad. *shifty eyes*
2006-05-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *the umpa lumpas dip rainbow in a vat of chocolate and then devour. anyone will eat something as long as theres chocolate on it*
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: I'd eat you if I were an umpa lumpa... *nodnod*
2006-05-08 [la vie lemon]: ...eew.
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: Hehe.
2006-05-08 [la vie lemon]: Same second!
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: ...thank you, Capitan Obvious.
2006-05-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.0
2006-05-08 [la vie lemon]: You're welcome!
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...captain obvious?! ...I'm a colonel...
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: ...and your point is?
2006-05-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *damnsher slow comp*
2006-05-08 [la vie lemon]: Mine recently caught on fire...
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: ...and that is why I don't put stuff on top of mine.
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...I have two drinks on top of mine right now...
2006-05-08 [la vie lemon]: ...smaaaaaart...
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: I knocked over a cup onto my computer earlier...but it was full of jellybeans...instead of a drink of some sort...
2006-05-08 [la vie lemon]: ...you don't have...bowls for your jellybeans? O.o
2006-05-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *eats rainbows jellybeans*
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...sicko!
2006-05-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *eats el malo pavos jellybeans*
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: ...nope! (to la vie lemon)
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: What? No comments?
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...NAPLES!!! AAAEEEEEEIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!
2006-05-08 [nokaredes]: ...eh?
2006-05-08 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...SQUIRRELS WITH MINIATURE WEED-WHACKERS!!! NNNOOOOOOO!!!
2006-05-09 [nokaredes]: *backs away slowly*
2006-05-09 [Fearathress]: *Runs in and yells* GAY BABY!!!
2006-05-09 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...WHAT?!
2006-05-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-05-09 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Oh no! NOT AGAIN!! ...*cries*...
2006-05-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-05-10 [nokaredes]: Yea, Misty1, you should be more consistant when you tell people you love them. Sheesh.
2006-05-10 [Saint Dragon]: no.
2006-05-10 [weasel2]: yes
2006-05-10 [Fearathress]: Random things for random ppl
2006-05-10 [fieryleo14]: ...me stupid! Me love women! HA HA HAA!!! ...God help you, Jr. get online...
2006-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok....
2006-05-10 [lady nytmare]: ...ha!
2006-05-10 [weasel2]: weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-05-11 [twinrova]: ok
2006-05-11 [nokaredes]: Why are most of these comments one word...?
2006-05-11 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...because we have nothing to talk about!
2006-05-11 [nokaredes]: ...then find a subject! Like me getting my learner's permit on Saturday! ...or something...*shifty eyes*
2006-05-11 [General Jelly Jiggler]:  ...dumbass...
2006-05-11 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...is there anything else about you getting your learner's permit to discuss...?
2006-05-11 [Saint Dragon]: I have a permit.. then i got a dui then a dmv
2006-05-11 [nokaredes]: Isn't a DMV a place, and not something to get? o_O // Yes! ...like how I already know how to drive! Standard, anyway...I'm getting my permit to legally *coughcough* learn how to drive a stickshift ^_^
2006-05-11 [Saint Dragon]: Driving meanwhile vaganal implants
2006-05-11 [nokaredes]: What about [General Jelly Jiggler]'s vaginal implants? <_<
2006-05-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: alrighty then
2006-05-11 [General Jelly Jiggler]: Yes, what about my vaginal implan- ...wait... *scratches chin*... *falls asleep*...
2006-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ha ha! woman! ....who is inferior to me......*eats ramen*....
2006-05-12 [nokaredes]: Today was my last day of school! :D
2006-05-12 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...so... you have free time now?!
2006-05-12 [nokaredes]: ...why do you want to know?
2006-05-12 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...er... that wasn't a question... it was more of a statement with a question mark...
2006-05-12 [nokaredes]: ...and an exclamation mark...
2006-05-12 [nokaredes]: ...my free time has, hypothetically, doubled. Just gives me time to learn traffic laws...like that you have to have your headlights on if your windsheild wipers are on!
2006-05-12 [nokaredes]: Also gives me time to find shortcuts to places from my work ^_^ Or maybe a new job...
2006-05-12 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...or both! ...but... the first one wouldn't matter... after you... got a new... job... uh... *eats viagra* ...WHEEEEEE!!!
2006-05-12 [nokaredes]: It wouldn't matter if I still work there in September and can drive to work, either :P
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love someone...
2006-05-13 [twinrova]: i love a kid named aidan, hahah.
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-05-13 [twinrova]: uh.... yeah about that
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever.
2006-05-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...and I eat ramen! *eats ramen*... oh NOOOO!!! ... bad noodle! ...wait! ...no! ...take misty1 instead! ...*cough*...*choke*...*die*...
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!! *does CPR*
2006-05-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...*dies even more*...
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHH BREATH DAMN IT BREATH!!!!!!!
2006-05-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: *exhales*
2006-05-13 [nokaredes]: I'm getting my CPR certification soon too ^_^ Should I be an organ donor...?
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: He is alive!!!!!!!!!!*falls into a pit and breaks my leg then crawls*
2006-05-13 [nokaredes]: Why do you always have to be so dramatic? And how did you fall into a pit with a bottom?!
2006-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Idk*falls into a semi-pit and breaks my other leg and dies a horrible painful death*
2006-05-13 [nokaredes]: You can't die from broken legs! ...and if you do, you'd be in so much pain, you wouldn't feel it...
2006-05-13 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...she's... dead?! ...*shrugs*... *puts her in the stew*...
2006-05-15 [nokaredes]: http://www.deviantart.com/view/19304105/
2006-05-15 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...Disturbing! Horribly, horribly, disturbing!
2006-05-16 [I'm her Georgia *Peach!*]: Not disturbing! FUNNY!!! XDDD which it is!!
2006-05-16 [General Jelly Jiggler]: ...and disturbing!
2006-05-16 [nokaredes]: It's to an ABBA song ^_^ I like ABBA...
2006-05-16 @Not logged in user@: ?!
2006-05-17 [nokaredes]: You have to add words in front of your punctuation before we can understand you, oh banned one...
2006-05-17 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...feh... *eats ramen*... Happy Five-days-till-a-month-till-brussel-sprouts-day Day! Woo! ...*eats ramen*...
2006-05-18 [nokaredes]: I've never had brussel sprouts...I hear they're gross...
2006-05-18 [blackenedrose*]: ARGH!! get rid of ABBA!!!
2006-05-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not dead.
2006-05-19 [nokaredes]: ...nooooooooo!
2006-05-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: LOL
2006-05-19 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Har-de-har-har... *cough* *choke*
2006-05-19 [nokaredes]: *doesn't give the heimlich maneuver*
2006-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *harks on you*
2006-05-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.......
2006-05-20 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...nonsensical drivel!
2006-05-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kisses Harry Potter*
2006-05-20 [nokaredes]: ...take that to the makeout shack!
2006-05-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: i don't know where it is.*continues to kiss Harry Potter*
2006-05-20 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...does Harry know about this?!
2006-05-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-05-20 [nokaredes]: Ha!
2006-05-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: what??
2006-05-20 [nokaredes]: ...nothing...nothing at all...
2006-05-20 [nokaredes]: Oh, and "Bob's makeout shack".
2006-05-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: thanks.
2006-05-20 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...
2006-05-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: :-)
2006-05-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: ;)
2006-05-22 [nokaredes]: >_>
2006-05-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...CYCLOPS!!!
2006-05-22 [weasel2]: poke cy in his eye hahahahahah
2006-05-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...a ham on rye!
2006-05-22 [nokaredes]: Stop all this nonsensical rhyming!!!
2006-05-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...a ham on rye!
2006-05-22 [nokaredes]: o_O
2006-05-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: WHAT THA?! ...I DIDN'T PUT THAT THERE!! ...I WASN'T EVEN ON AT THAT TIME!!! ...*blames [nokaredes]*...
2006-05-22 [nokaredes]: Why me? I did nothing!
2006-05-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...suuuuure... *watches you*...
2006-05-22 [nokaredes]: I would reply to that somewhat creepy comment, but as there are nearly 70 watchers of this wiki, I'm not sure I feel entirely comfortable...
2006-05-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...those watchers don't know nothin' 'bout nothin'...
2006-05-23 [nokaredes]: ...but they might, if I comment. *shifty eyes*
2006-05-23 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...if only your 'f' key didn't work...
2006-05-23 [nokaredes]: ..."shity eyes"?! *offended*
2006-05-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: *smiles at you 2* funny
2006-05-26 [nokaredes]: ...this wiki is dying...*is too lazy to do CPR*
2006-05-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *SIGH*
2006-05-27 [nokaredes]: *sigh*
2006-05-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-05-27 [nokaredes]: ^_^
2006-05-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't care
2006-05-27 [nokaredes]: ...good! Neither do I!
2006-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-05-29 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Don't worry... your loveable turkey pal is here... oh wait... *reads dictionary*... I mean to say... "evil death trap" turkey pal...
2006-05-29 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Someone in this room is killing this wiki... And I'm innocent. That only leaves misty1. But in the off chance that it wasn't her either, we need to get some more people in this room...
2006-05-29 [nokaredes]: ...don't spam...you'll get banned again...
2006-05-30 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...not really what I meant, but whatever.
2006-05-31 [nokaredes]: I know it's not what you meant >_> But don't spam anyway <_<
2006-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,whatever...
2006-05-31 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...she's added a word to her vocabulary!
2006-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*
2006-05-31 [nokaredes]: ...she caught it from you...*puts on a painter's mask so she doesn't catch the "whatever" bug*
2006-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-05-31 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *takes off your mask and coughs on you* ...ha ha! I infected you! ...congratulations. You now have AIDS...
2006-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2006-05-31 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: I assume that's an "ahhh" of pleasure?
2006-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hell No!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-05-31 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: I assume that's a "hell no" of pleasure?
2006-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: no
2006-06-01 [nokaredes]: Whee AIDS! Finally, I've been trying so long...
2006-06-01 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Well... I could have helped you a long time ago! ...all you had to do was ask...
2006-06-01 [nokaredes]: ...how was I supposed to know you had AIDS?
2006-06-01 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...my business card...?
2006-06-01 [nokaredes]: You never gave me your business card!
2006-06-01 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...exactly... *pats your... back.*
2006-06-01 [DarkAngel3]: um...Am I interupting?
2006-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't think you are,but hey I don't know.
2006-06-02 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*eats ramen*...
2006-06-02 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Well... I think it's time to start another cult... All my followers! Put this symbol, ぬ, in your houses! And tell others to do the same! *eats ramen*...
2006-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever ♥
2006-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: ♥☻☺♠☻
2006-06-03 [nokaredes]: ...*notices how Misty1 randomly puts those symbols on B's D every few months*...
2006-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,sorry
2006-06-04 [The Bad Τurkey]: Yo... I found a bunch of good proxies that let you make usernames without email addresses... *sticks thumb up*...
2006-06-04 [nokaredes]: ...since when are the French greasy?!
2006-06-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...since... always!
2006-06-04 [nokaredes]: *goes off to partially not be greasy*
2006-06-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*eats... YO MAMA*...
2006-06-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]:
MAZE OF GUILE
2006-06-04 [nokaredes]: That place is so boring...
2006-06-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: what??
2006-06-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Boring because I can't get some people to finish it for me...
2006-06-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-06-05 [nokaredes]: Lazy bum.
2006-06-05 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...mmm... bum...
2006-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-06-05 [nokaredes]: ...eew.
2006-06-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-06-06 [nokaredes]: No comments? ...well...they don't have Canadian geese in Nevada!
2006-06-06 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: They don't have ninjas either!
2006-06-06 [nokaredes]: *gasp* How will I survive?!
2006-06-06 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...boringly! That's how you'll survive!
2006-06-06 [nokaredes]: ...well...at least Nevada has gambling and prostitutes! *will rot eternal soul*
2006-06-06 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...prostitutes, you say...
2006-06-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *cocks an eyebrow*WTF??
2006-06-06 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the gang of chickens burst in and steal misty's eyebrows*
2006-06-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: hey!*grabs my eyebrows back and shoots the chickens with 20 arrows*
2006-06-07 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the pride of lions burst in and steal your legs*
2006-06-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: grows new legs and shots the pride of lions 20 times with a gun and arrows.
2006-06-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a gang of penguins bust in and drag [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets*
2006-06-07 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the gang of bangers burst in and drag rainbows into the streets*
2006-06-07 [nokaredes]: What? Why me? ...what kind of bangers? And since when do you steal other people's eyebrows? *totally not jealous*
2006-06-07 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: I didn't steal them! ...the chickens did. *nodnod*... *shaves off your eyebrows*...
2006-06-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes then closes them incase [Thε ßαd Turkεy] tried to steal them*
2006-06-07 [nokaredes]: *notices how the first three questions have gone unanswered*...*steals Misty1's eyelids*
2006-06-08 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...Hey! I was going to steal those! *steals your knee caps* ...*ignores questions*...
2006-06-08 [nokaredes]: *buys new titanium kneecaps with anti-theft devices*
2006-06-08 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...what?!
2006-06-08 [nokaredes]: ...you heard me.
2006-06-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: what quetions?
2006-06-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets eyelids back and puts and put glass over eyelids*
2006-06-08 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *steals your eyelid glass*
2006-06-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hides*
2006-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hides in shark infested water with Sharkboy*
2006-06-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...how dare you?! That's it! ...Super Pepper Attack!! ...*eats peppers*... *shoots Misty1 with a bazooka*... that'll teach you to steal my fries! *eats fries*...
2006-06-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Ye-uh! All up in yo grizzle, bizzle!
2006-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't steal your fries.
2006-06-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: I know you are! ...that doesn't mean you can make fun of me!! ...*runs away sobbing like a very manly school girl*
2006-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm sorry*hugs [Thε ßαd Turkεy]*
2006-06-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*coughchoke*... *dies*... oh... I have some serious haunting to do...
2006-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty1's wedding,all of my friends are invited.
2006-06-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...go to Bob's Diner! It's great! *sticks thumb up*
2006-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: we are at bob's diner
2006-06-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...cho mama!
2006-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm getting married so everyone is invited.Misty1's wedding
2006-06-10 [nokaredes]: ...when did I agree to be a bridesmaid?! I haven't even RSVP'd yet! ...and Dustin, she made you my date...
2006-06-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: im not invited!
2006-06-10 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...what? What?! ...WHAT?!?!
2006-06-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sigh*
2006-06-10 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...never! *commits suicide*... er... I mean... sure! I'll be your date!
2006-06-10 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *throws rotten tomatoes at Veari* Fist of the shakey shake: ROTTEN TOMATOE BOMB!!!
2006-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: it is over now
2006-06-11 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sigh*
2006-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-06-11 [nokaredes]: I don't want to be your date anyway. >_>
2006-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2006-06-11 [nokaredes]: What?
2006-06-11 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the gang of chickens burst in and start eating worms from the floorboards*
2006-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok......
2006-06-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok then
2006-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-06-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-06-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: :-)
2006-06-14 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: w hLaitkeev,e r .
2006-06-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.........
2006-06-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a gang of penguins bust in and drag [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets*
2006-06-15 [nokaredes]: o_o I know how you did that...
2006-06-15 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *eats sushi*
2006-06-16 [sunabozu]: you guys hate thoese hentai freaks
2006-06-16 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...uh huh... uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2006-06-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: *runs away*
2006-06-17 [la vie lemon]: What's hentai again?
2006-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Everyone(except [Thε ßαd Turkεy]),please go to my new wiki,Child Abuse Haters
2006-06-17 [sunabozu]: anime porn ,the girls in the movies look like thery only twelve
2006-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok....
2006-06-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: *eats some ramen*
2006-06-18 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...What?! You can't possibly expect to advertise a wiki that excludes me in my own wiki and get away with it!! ...I'll delete your comment later...
2006-06-18 [nokaredes]: ...you guys sure are boring...
2006-06-18 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...reeeaaaally? *rubs teeth*
2006-06-18 [nokaredes]: I hope they burst into flames again!
2006-06-18 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *installed a firewall just in case*
2006-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: you are already there dumdum
2006-06-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: *falls asleep* this is getting boring
2006-06-19 [weasel2]: runs in and gives all ice cream
2006-06-19 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*eats weasel*... *throws away icecream*...
2006-06-20 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: (clickable link)>                                                                              <(clickable link)
2006-06-20 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: I must advise you all... do not click that link... uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2006-06-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: *eats some ramen*
2006-06-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: why can't we click the link?
2006-06-20 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...I didn't say you couldn't... I mean... you can if you want... I just advise you don't click it and comment there... *winkwinkthrowsabrickwink*
2006-06-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2006-06-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: is it porn,or something,just so I know,cause if it is I don't want to click on the link.
2006-06-21 [The Slave Queen]: i think its one of those reverse phsycology attempt things. "dont click" hehe, they clicked!
2006-06-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-06-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...not really...
2006-06-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2006-06-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...would you people stop that?!
2006-06-22 [nokaredes]: ...stop what?
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...one word sentences?
2006-06-22 [nokaredes]: Oh.
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...AAAGH!
2006-06-22 [nokaredes]: :)
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the chickens... you know... drag you... streets... all that jazz*
2006-06-22 [nokaredes]: ...but they don't do anything to me because you said they listen to me too...so there...
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*the lions burst in and drag everyone into the streets and lock us all out*... well... I hope you're happy!
2006-06-22 [nokaredes]: ...we can get back in through the secret reverse-escape route! ...we have one of those, right?
2006-06-22 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...or... you know... the broken down door...
2006-06-22 [nokaredes]: ...works for me ^_^
2006-06-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: lets go through then
2006-06-24 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...nah... let's wait a few more days...
2006-06-24 [nokaredes]: ...and not comment then, too ^_^
2006-06-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: fine whatever
2006-06-27 [Fearathress]: Whats up?!!
2006-06-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: nothing
2006-06-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...?
2006-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-06-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Hello.
2006-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: how are you?
2006-06-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Good just wondering why when I go to Nintendo it leads me here.
2006-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,ok
2006-06-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: So what is this place about?
2006-06-29 [Fallen Child Athena]: its a diner *eats ramen*
2006-06-29 [Xeroh Kanoe]: O.o
2006-06-29 [Fallen Child Athena]: *a gang of penguins bust in and drag [Fallen Child Athena] into the streets*
2006-06-29 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *beats the penguins with a large stick.*
2006-06-29 [nokaredes]: *is going to live in the Diner for a few weeks* *buys a tent*
2006-06-29 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I gotta go.
2006-06-29 [nokaredes]: ...I'm gonna stay? o_O
2006-06-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *a gang of elephants burst in and drag [~Crimson Angel~] to the jungle*ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2006-06-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes the elephants with a dildo*
2006-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm Queen of the jungle!
2006-06-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: look at what i said
2006-06-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: what's a dildo?
2006-06-30 [nokaredes]: You know, I'm not sure you guys are taking the whole "dragged out of Bob's Diner" thing as seriously as you should be.
2006-06-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: i am....i just dont want to leave
2006-06-30 [nokaredes]: ...no one dragged you out of B's D! ...lately...
2006-07-01 [nokaredes]:  ?
2006-07-02 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I say drawing.
2006-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-07-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: i agree with sniper
2006-07-03 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the gang of chickens burst in (politely tipping the coat-taking guy) and drag everyone that's not camping into the streets* ...uh... *gets in [nokaredes]'s tent*...
2006-07-03 [nokaredes]: ...hi!
2006-07-03 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...who the heck are you?!
2006-07-03 [nokaredes]: ...no one interesting... *starts packing up the tent*
2006-07-03 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...don't do it! *grabs your leg*
2006-07-03 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hides behind the counter*
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: ...b-but...you don't know who I am!
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...I know! ...But I can smell ramen on you!
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: *smacks your hand* Pedophile!
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...yes?
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: ...get off of my leg? o_o
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...never! *nibbles it*... mmm... ramen flavor...
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: *cattleprods you*
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...ouchies!
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: ...haha!
2006-07-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: *looks up above the counter to see if everything is ok*
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *the counter explodes*
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: Good thing [Fallen Child Athena] was surrounded by Allie's Exploding Counter Shield™!
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...darn it! You beat me to the patent...
2006-07-04 [nokaredes]: ..."your beat me"...?
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: What you talkin' 'bout?!
2006-07-04 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...............what?! Pedophile?!
2006-07-05 [nokaredes]: *mocks typos* Changing your comments is cheating, you know...
2006-07-05 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...I have no idea what you're talking about.
2006-07-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: im saved
2006-07-05 [sunabozu]: *lights a smoke*
2006-07-05 [MoRoxy]: ooh O.O
2006-07-05 [nokaredes]: Hey! If you're letting the wolves back, don't you have to delete the comment at the top of this wiki?
2006-07-05 [sunabozu]: *blows smoke in everyones face*
2006-07-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: *walks around*
2006-07-05 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...never!
2006-07-05 [sunabozu]: *plays with knife*im back baby
2006-07-05 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *slowly backs away*
2006-07-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: thanks for putting up my story.*hugs [Thε ßαd Turkεy] in happiness*
2006-07-05 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *burns self to death*
2006-07-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-07-06 [nokaredes]: ...[Kiristo] is a real person! Does she know she's on this wiki?!
2006-07-06 [nokaredes]: http://community.livejournal.com/mock_the_stupid/2377252.html?nc=50 To go with the Mental mints ;P The French are crazy.
2006-07-06 [sunabozu]: hello
2006-07-06 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...what up, cracka'?
2006-07-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: hello
2006-07-06 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ......?!
2006-07-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: i dont know
2006-07-07 [nokaredes]: I was alseep for 12 hours, and nobody said anything here?
2006-07-07 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*picks nostril*...
2006-07-07 [nokaredes]: ...besides that.
2006-07-07 [nokaredes]: *camps out at B's D again*
2006-07-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: can i camp out with you [nokaredes]?
2006-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF?!
2006-07-08 [nokaredes]: ...as long as you have your own tent...
2006-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.......
2006-07-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok *gets tent*
2006-07-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Hi, I'm a commenting Turkey.
2006-07-09 [nokaredes]: ...and I'm a camping Allie!
2006-07-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...I feel your pain.
2006-07-09 [nokaredes]: ...what...pain?
2006-07-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: In your upper eyebrow.
2006-07-09 [nokaredes]: As opposed to my...lower eyebrow?
2006-07-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Indeed. We must have a transplant!
2006-07-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hides*
2006-07-09 [nokaredes]: ...but... that could kill me!
2006-07-09 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...we must! In the name of science! ...and in the name of Chuck the janitor!
2006-07-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-07-10 [sunabozu]: i ran 22 and a half miles yesterdy
2006-07-10 [nokaredes]: ...well... I'm not sure what that has to do with either this diner or the present conversation... but... congratulations? o_o
2006-07-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2006-07-11 [sunabozu]: the kids of tomorrow dont need today when they live in the sins of yesterday
2006-07-11 [nokaredes]: I'd say something about the gang of chickens dragging you into the street for making a rhyme, but that'd be copying, so I won't.
2006-07-11 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*ahem*... *the gang of chickens burst in and drag BIRD17 (over glass) into the streets*...
2006-07-11 [nokaredes]: *lost a ''g'' somewhere*
2006-07-11 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *gets alphabet detector*
2006-07-11 [nokaredes]: ...that must have cost a fortune!
2006-07-11 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...three fortunes... and a pony...
2006-07-12 [nokaredes]: ...comments sure are slow these days...
2006-07-12 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...I blame the NHL...
2006-07-12 [DarkAngel3]: uh...*fairly lost*
2006-07-12 [nokaredes]: ...I suggest you try to get used to that feeling...
2006-07-12 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...and then take it deep into the woods and shoot it dead.
2006-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...hi...? HI...? ...HI?! ...*gets out chainsaw*... I'll "hi" you!!!
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*the evil purple elefents protect their master,hopelessromantic*
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: Evil, you say... and they're... protecting you...?
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am their evil queen.
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...and they're... not afraid of the rats in here like many a cartoon would suggest...?
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: no
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *picks nose*... not even a little afraid of the fact that there is a rather large hyena that wandered in here nibbling on their legs...?
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: yes*the evil mountain lions kill and eat the hyena*
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*the pride of lions burst in and order a coffee and begin discussing the economy*... "I quite agree there, Jeremy, but would it not be easier for the state to own the industry?" ...socialist lions! Run for it!
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: *hides outside with the rapists and hobos*
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...aahh... much safer...
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.....
2006-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...*asks the lions if they were alive during the Civil War*...
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok......
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*they nod politely, but not too politely*...
2006-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...which side were you supporting?
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ..."Why, the East, of course!"...
2006-07-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hides*
2006-07-13 [sunabozu]: *turns into monster*I AM GOING TO KILL YOU*growl*
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*picks nose*... that's not scary! You got the nose all wrong...
2006-07-13 [sunabozu]: *punches narcissist's nose*there i feel better
2006-07-13 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...you feel better?! ...what about how you look?! ...we must do surgery!
2006-07-13 [sunabozu]: i happen to look fine
2006-07-13 [nokaredes]: ...that was random o_o Do I know [sunabozu]? I know [~Crimson Angel~] used to be Misty1...
2006-07-13 [sunabozu]: say toyboat ten time without messing up
2006-07-13 [nokaredes]: *does* Ha!
2006-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-07-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok then
2006-07-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: :-)
2006-07-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: *is confussed*
2006-07-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: what?
2006-07-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: ii dont know
2006-07-14 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...oh... hi there, hopelessromantic...
2006-07-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sigh*
2006-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *SIGH*
2006-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...you might not be seeing me here much anymore... (Turkey, don't give it away)...
2006-07-15 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...*disdis*...
2006-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...eh?
2006-07-15 [Thε ßαd Turkεy]: ...nothing!
2006-07-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: huh?
2006-07-15 [nokaredes]: ...Turkey said that everytime he gets banned, the number of watchers here goes up. I, on the other hand, don't know, as I don't obsessively count the watchers of this wiki...
2006-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-07-16 [The Bad Turkeу]: ...which you should...
2006-07-17 @Not logged in user@: ...never!
2006-07-17 @Not logged in user@: ...I can't edit comments when I'm not logged in...
2006-07-17 [The Bad Turkeу]: ...ha ha!
2006-07-17 @Not logged in user@: ...copycat!
2006-07-17 [The Bad Turkeу]: ...*the gang of chickens burst in, but can't drag you into the streets because you're not logged in*... *they just take Misty instead*...
2006-07-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: *watches*
2006-07-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *the gang of evil purple elephants stomp the chickens to death to protect there loving master,Misty*
2006-07-18 @Not logged in user@: ...why can't the chickens drag me out of B's D?
2006-07-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: you aren't logged in.
2006-07-18 @Not logged in user@: So?
2006-07-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: who is this not logged in person?
2006-07-18 @Not logged in user@: ...I am [@97422], although, of course, anyone can be "@Not logged in user@"...
2006-07-18 [The Bad Turkeу]: *the chickens burst up from the ground and drag [nokaredes] into the streets*...
2006-07-18 @Not logged in user@: How can they drag a house into the street?
2006-07-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2006-07-18 [The Bad Turkeу]: ...they're on steroids...
2006-07-18 @Not logged in user@: *calls the Feds*
2006-07-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs*
2006-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight.... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*rambles on*... *sees a lion*... *smacks lion and runs*...*eats ramen*...
2006-07-19 [Turkeу]: HOW COULD YOU?! HOW COULD YOU BE CRUEL TO THAT HIDEOUS ANIMAL?! ...for shame, lion...
2006-07-19 [nokaredes]: ...caps lock broken?
2006-07-19 [The Bad Τurkey]: ...nope! *whacks keboard*... NOOOOOOOOOOW IT IS...
2006-07-19 @Not logged in user@: ...and.. what was the point of that?
2006-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Let's discuss politics!
2006-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...okay... let's not... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: *eats ramen* anyway
2006-07-19 @Not logged in user@: ...I don't know why you bother making new accounts, Turkey... it's much more fun to be [@-1]... (I wonder if that link is going to work...)
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not Turkey. I'm the owner and creator of Bob's Diner. Although, he does make too many clones of himself... he has the record of getting banned the most times on Elftown. I don't know the exact number... *eats ramen*.......... *watches news*... *sees terrorists bombings and total war in Beirut*... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-20 [spitfire_35121]: ...you fat sack of crap... you didn't create this! ...you only made the name, you dingus! ...and it's twelve... twelve bannings. Not including the times I've gotten yours and David's usernames banned... and call me! Your phone still doesn't work!
2006-07-20 [spitfire_35121]: ...and David never comes on anyway... I saw no problem in using his name while I get a new one...
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...except now, they'll ban that name again...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: Send all messages to me to David's name... these clones of mine don't seem to last long now that [Paul Doyle] and [Sunrose] feel that the occasional stupid comment deserves a lifetime ban... despite the fact that I've donated art, reported bugs, reported members, and done other not-so-stupid-but-still-relatively-helpful things...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...one would think these people would get a life instead of stalking me... and you just know they're watching this wiki...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...they wouldn't ban poor little David!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: Or... I could just talk to you on MSN...
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...of course, not!... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: I used to like [@45154]... <_< >_>
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I made Bob's Diner... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I haven't been on, so I don't know these people... are you Allie?
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...what the hack?! ...no you didn't! I did! ...then pixiestickchick helped me and made those "specials" things I never change...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...and I drew some more of Till Danderfluff... and let that be a lesson to you...
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight... David's coming over Friday!... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...I know! You already told me...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: three more weeks 'til school! ...and I need my memory card back... I just won a mob war... (playing the Godfather)... how far did you get?
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... Hezbollah?... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...what?! Hezbollah?!
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...wh- what is that?!
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I've gotten to being an underboss and beating the game... I returned it today...
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: You haven't been heavily involved in politics lately, have you?... *eats ramen* ....
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...now... let's go raid Anthro Lovers!
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...sure I'm into politics! ...and stocks... Dow's gone down! ...and there's a war!
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...and worst of all... I'm out of ramen!
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...so... you played the part where they put the horse's head in the guy's bed?
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: yuppers...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...sweeeeet... I just got all four other families vendetta levels as high as they go... my life span is like... two minutes! ...'cause of that and the darn coppers following me...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...you know... I have a girlfriend... *coughAlliecough*... and David has a girlfriend... unless she's dead... so... where's your girlfriend?!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...number of watchers is up...
2006-07-20 [Jimmy cracked corn, and I don't care]: ...clones would account for three of those... but one must be another guard! ...woo?!
2006-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: My girlfriend?... well, there was Hannah... but, she would only count as a hooker in your terms, Dustin...*eats ramen*... David still owes her money...
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...now that I'm a "not logged in user"... I can't be banned! ...now... where were we... Yeah, that Hannah... you two sure went through a messy break-up, huh? ...and all those kids... tisk tisk... what will become of little Jimmy Chavez now...?
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...also, [@11046] sucks and [@45154] sucks.
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...and most of all... [@92105] and [@85872] suck!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...and [@53406] sucks! ...and [@1] sucks!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: *is dragged away by the people from the insane asylum next door*... They sure do get good business being next door to this place...
2006-07-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: *watches* haha
2006-07-20 [nokaredes]: ...is that one person or two? o_o
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...just me!
2006-07-20 [nokaredes]: ...gonna get banned again, you are...
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: I have faith that they will see the good in me and repent from their wicked ways of banning me... For I am naught but good! And kind and forgiving! ...I am a holy man, indeed... *shoots random little kid*... indeed, I say... indeed.
2006-07-20 [nokaredes]: ...I don't think the Guards are that forgiving...
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...even though I didn't doooo anything this time... I had like a 50 day not-getting-banned streak! ...but nooo...
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...I think it might have been 'cause you told me to bother Hedda with unbanning [@53406]...
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...probably... but that was you!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...they... knew you asked? o_o
2006-07-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...[@107284]!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...stalker!
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...*the gang of chickens burst in and are bored with this gag*...
2006-07-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: im no stalker
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...what gag?
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...the ...<_<... >_>... gag.
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: *blinkblink*
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...*glues your eyes shut*...
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: What's this?! ...a guard and a Paul done visited ma' house! ...huck huck hayuck!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: Woo! Now I can move into any appartment and still get to keep my dog! 'Cause it's a seeing eye dog! And it's against the law not to let me have it! :D
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...haha... you're gonna get banned again...
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...what?! Your dog's a seeing eye dog?! ...*glues it's eyes shut*...
2006-07-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: and IM NOT A STALKER
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: *gets another* // Someone's in denial... >_>
2006-07-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: i am not
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: Hey [@107284]... have you been to [Your visualization of Turkey@wiki]?
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...yes... I admit that I'm in denial... but cannibalism's just so fun!
2006-07-20 @Not logged in user@: ...and... you expect to have kids with that attitude?
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...hmm... children with my additude... interesting... but however would I concieve these freak babies?
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: I'm not even attracted to my additude... have you even seen it?! ...It's all fat and ugly...
2006-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...HI?! ...you take that back!
2006-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is scared*Misty's new boyfriend:Don't be mean to her or I'll slit your throat.
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...uh huh... uh huh... *throws rock at misty*
2006-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: OW!Misty's new boyfriend:*teleports her to the hospital*
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: *plants bomb in the hospital*... Die, Barzini scum!
2006-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty's new boyfriend:*teleports her to a place where you can't find us*
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: *plants a bomb on misty's boyfriend*
2006-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty's new boyfriend:*teleports the bomb*
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...that's it... super fist of the jerky turkey: Just shoot 'em! *shoots randomly*
2006-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Edward Elric:*Protects them*Don't hurt my friends.
2006-07-20 [Mary had a little lamb]: *eats Ed*
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Al:*beats the crap out of Mary had a little lamb*
2006-07-21 [Mary had a little lamb]: *eats Al*
2006-07-21 [Mary had a little lamb]: ...hmm... Iron... that's healthy! *sticks thumb up*
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Envy:hmmmmmmm...
2006-07-21 [nokaredes]: ...but I wanted to be Gluttony!
2006-07-21 [nokaredes]: ...I guess I'll have to be Wrath...
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm Lust
2006-07-21 [Tizurkey]: ...I want to be pride!
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-07-21 [Tizurkey]: *stabs misty for no reason*
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty and the guy with red hair:DIE BASTURD!
2006-07-21 [Tizurkey]: Ok, ok... *dyes the guy's hair brown*...
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO TOUCHING THE BOY FRIEND!!*fixes his and makes it red again*
2006-07-21 [Tizurkey]: *pokes this friend of your that happens to be a boy*
2006-07-21 @Not logged in user@: ...what's your boyfriend's name, Misty1?
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmm....He didn't tell me.
2006-07-21 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: ...What?!
2006-07-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH SHUT THE HELL UP TURKEY BOY!
2006-07-21 [Τhe Bad Τurkey]: *picks nose* ...huh? Whut'd yuh say?
2006-07-21 @Not logged in user@: *eats ramen*
2006-07-21 @Not logged in user@: ...all up in yo grill!
2006-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: WHO ATE RAMEN?!
2006-07-21 @Not logged in user@: ...Jesus Christ, your Lord and Saviour?
2006-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Cho Mama... a Chinese person!
2006-07-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: OMG,I'm suronded by Morons.
2006-07-22 [nokaredes]: ...and... you're... just figuring this out now? o_o
2006-07-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: no
2006-07-22 [nokaredes]: ...then why are you only mentioning it now?
2006-07-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: idk
2006-07-23 [sara(:]: Lmao I'm still the hooker..I mean butcher.. :]
2006-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-07-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-07-26 [nokaredes]: ...I haven't been on for three days, and there's only four comments? o_o Sad, sad people...
2006-07-26 @Not logged in user@: Sara... Sara...? Never heard of 'er! ...*eats ramen*... hey, look, it's Sara! ...Where'd you come from?!
2006-07-26 @Not logged in user@: *throws boiling water at Sara*
2006-07-26 [sara(:]: Riiiight..::shakes fist::
2006-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hottie of the Town please go there
2006-07-26 [sara(:]: Why should I go there? o_o
2006-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: my friend asked me to spread the word
2006-07-26 [sara(:]: Well okey-dokey then.
2006-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-07-26 @Not logged in user@: Sara! ...it's me! ...Dusty! ...*throws a brick at you*...
2006-07-26 [sara(:]: I know it's you! How's summer there 'Dusty'
2006-07-28 @Not logged in user@: Ah, you know... fervent heat... demons proding you with giant forks... aliens and rednecks probing random places... the usual...
2006-07-28 @Not logged in user@: ...hmm... leeches... in my Corn Flakes... interesting... *eats ramen instead*...
2006-07-28 @Not logged in user@: ...what?! ...666 pages of past comments?!
2006-07-28 [sara(:]: That's nothing new...
2006-07-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: alrighty then
2006-07-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-07-29 [Fallen Child Athena]: anyways
2006-07-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-07-29 @Not logged in user@: ...it's actually "anyway"... no such word as "anyways"! ...all my horse for a kingdom... *eats turkey flavored ramen*... P-PA?! ...NOOOOO!!! ...now where'd I put those leechey corn flakes...
2006-07-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF?!
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2006-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: sup?
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: W-WHAT?! A creature...? In MY diner?!... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why was TBT banned?
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... there are many reasons... back when he first got on ET he used to bother everyone because it was fun... everyone started hating him more and more... He holds the record for being banned the most times! In fact, he's beaten his own record about four fold. But what do I know?... *eats ramen*...
2006-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't hate him
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...thank yew... thank yew vehry mooch... and nooo... I didn't start bothering people (for fun) until after the... fourth time, was it? ...yeah... I think that was it... RAMEN PARTY!!! *tosses boiling ramen into the air*
2006-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wait,YOU'RE THE BAD TURKEY?!
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...and... you didn't make this diner, darn you moocher!
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: Darn straight, lil' Turkey pot pie...
2006-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: OMG,*hugs*I missed you
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...what the hack?! ...but I'm always on here! ...with such names as, Sagacious Turkey, Gluttony, Garfield the Cat, The Bad Turkey², and a bunch other crap I done fergotted... hayuck... *hitches up overalls*
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: This "diner" sucks, anyway... the only reason it's any good is the comical comments by that delectible turkey! ...and the occasional toxic Mort...
2006-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen again*...
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: Now... on to the invasion of Pokopen... gero gero gero! ...speaking of which... the second book is funnier... but the third book contains brief nudity...
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...and a bikini contest... and a drunk girl...
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ?!
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Gimme dat book, foo!
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: I'll gives yah an anal cherry bomb is whut I'll gives yah...
2006-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, It's on now, mutha'!
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...you want some, nigga'?! ...there's a big beautiful rainbow outside... all the way across our house... so inspirational... *farts*...
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...hey! Where's the pot of gold?! ...darn lying rainbow...
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: *shoots it with the Tommy gun* ...sorry, rainbow... it's just business.
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: Hmm... I wonder if they banned David's name yet... Oh well! ...I forgot what his password was, anyway... *eats hooker*... hmm... this one's expired...
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: Hey! ...you took down them there pictures I done putted in yer house! ...you... you slut!
2006-07-30 [nokaredes]: Well, first of all, some of those "@Not logged in user@" comments are mine... stop taking credit for them! >:O ...and... the only reason this diner is interesting is because of you...? o_o
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...the first few were you... but you still have a name on here! ...what am I saying...? I still have several on here! ...but that's not the point! ...*picks nose*... and yes! ...it is only interesting because of me!
2006-07-30 @Not logged in user@: ...then maybe I should just go away... especially since Mortimer banned everyone from Pirates Palace from commenting here... although... I seem to have some sort of "neutrality" thing going on...
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: ...that was repealed!
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: [@53406]:*pickpick*
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: ...there... I labelled myself as turkey...
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: ook
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...?
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: [@53406]: Heeeey... who the hack are you...?
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: The name is Shadow Kuzimari and yes I've been here before.
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know him...he is also a part of my wiki
2006-07-31 [nokaredes]: ...I recognise your house-page, [Xeroh Kanoe]...
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey cody....what wa your name befor?
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Feirce Deity.
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: thats right
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: How do you know me Nokaredes?
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: thats what i want to know
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: Turkey, darn you!: Maybe she's just seen your house before...?
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: That is possable but to recognize just by browsing...
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: ...Or she meant it's a typical house... perhaps? *eats banana*
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: My house is not that typical... Who are you anyways?
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea who in the hell are you?
2006-07-31 [Xeroh Kanoe]: A banned member for spamming...[Sagacious Turkey]
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: i've heard some things about him
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: i just cant remember anything
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: What the hack?! ...you're on my wiki you don't even know who I am?! *smacks head*
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: ...spamming is such an ugly word, you mother spamming spammer... *gives 'spamming' a makeover*
2006-07-31 [Fallen Child Athena]: well your not logged in.....so hush
2006-07-31 @Not logged in user@: ...I could be...
2006-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: dang I got the strangest message from [nokaredes].
2006-08-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok
2006-08-01 @Not logged in user@: Share, misty, darn you! What'd she say? What'd she say?!
2006-08-01 [xxxecil]: Adventuring Party Art Contest!!! I figure most of us have at least *heard* of D&D, or some knockoff; why not an art competition featuring your own band of intrepid stalwarts. I'd host it myself, but I'm disqualified from my own competition, and I'd like to participate in one like this. Any takers?
2006-08-01 @Not logged in user@: What the?! ...now where did you come from...?
2006-08-01 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...?
2006-08-02 [nokaredes]: ...I dunno... I just know... *makes a creepy gesture*
2006-08-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-08-02 @Not logged in user@: Wh- what kind of gesture was that?!
2006-08-02 @Not logged in user@: *shoots random people* ...you live! You die! ...You live! ...You die!
2006-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*seriously eats ramen*... beef flavored!
2006-08-02 @Not logged in user@: ...heeeey... all you have is shrimp and lime!
2006-08-02 [Revolution]: There's lime flavored ramen?
2006-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: she said,"Do you mind if me and [Sagacious Turkey] get married?"
2006-08-03 [nokaredes]: ...I believe I asked, "...would you be mad if [Sagacious Turkey] and I got married...?"...
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: ...yeah! Answer, woman!
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: Not so much lime as in lime flavored shrimp...
2006-08-03 [nokaredes]: ...man, it'd be great if I could see the last time [@Not logged in user@] was on... but there's no such house... 'tis a bug...
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: It sure would... *pats your back*
2006-08-03 [nokaredes]: ...*sprays Lysol on her back*...
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: ...If I can't pat your back... where should I pat...?
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: Don't you dot-dot-dot me! ...I'll open up a can of whoop-mule on you!
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: ...and then enjoy it with a nice bowl of beef ramen...
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]:
RAMAN!
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: Ramen, darn you! *eats vine fresh ramen*... mmm... homegrown!
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ?.?
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: ...Ah, yes... Ramen... it comes in many different flavors! Including shrimp, beef, chicken, pork, shark fin, veggie style, and human! ...that last one kinda got the ramen company into some trouble... but oh well! *eats human flavored ramen*... mmm... tastes like Mexican!
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: ...did I say "mmm"? I'm sorry, I meant to say, "OH GOD! NOOOOO!!!"... just a simple typo... the keys are like... right next to each other!
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Did you know gulable's not in the dictinary.
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: Of course not! ...Gullible, however, is... Well... it really depends on which dictionary you look in... I have one from 1930 here where it isn't... This newer version, however has it... right beneath 'gull'... *eats apteryx flavored ramen*...
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: My favorite is Robot flavor...
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: ...Robot flavor?! ...That's ridiculous! ...Don't be stupid, you moron! ...*eats robot flavored ramen*... sheesh... some people... *shakes head*... *chokes on metal chunk*... *dies*...
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Silly human Ramens for robots.
2006-08-03 @Not logged in user@: Humans...? ...aren't those endangered...? ...no... wait... that's the man-eating mongoose of Southern Canada... I tend to get them mixed up...
2006-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2006-08-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *pulls out a bowl of penguin flavered ramen* Mmm.
2006-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO THAT POOR PENGUIN,NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*yanks the bowl from your hands and sue the Ramen company for killing penguins and wins 100 billion dollars*YAY!!! I'M RICH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-08-04 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *sneakes into Misty 1s house and steals the money* NOW I'M RICH!YAY!!
2006-08-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: *laughs*
2006-08-04 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *shifty eyes.*
2006-08-05 @Not logged in user@: *shoots you and takes the money*... what's this? A new comment box?
2006-08-05 @Not logged in user@: Now I can finally calculate pi in the comment box without running out of space! ...mmm... pie...
2006-08-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-08-05 [sunabozu]: yo
2006-08-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey
2006-08-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]:  (do it for the baby!!!)
2006-08-05 @Not logged in user@: ...to... raise the baby's self esteem...?
2006-08-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: yep i did.i just wont tell you what i put
2006-08-06 @Not logged in user@: You put "I've seen better."
2006-08-06 @Not logged in user@: The number of watchers has gone down...
2006-08-06 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I stoped watching...
2006-08-06 @Not logged in user@: ...screw yo mama!
2006-08-06 [Xeroh Kanoe]: First off leave my mom out of this and seconed I was joking.
2006-08-06 @Not logged in user@: ...uh... screw yo daddy...?
2006-08-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: im sorry...but i hate kids
2006-08-07 @Not logged in user@: *pats your back*... don't we all? Don't... we... all... *eats ramen*
2006-08-07 [sara(:]: what the hack?!
2006-08-07 @Not logged in user@: What the hack, indeed...
2006-08-07 [sara(:]: Mhmm, indeed. School starts Thursday, how great...
2006-08-07 @Not logged in user@: Yes... yes it does... woo!
2006-08-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: im sorry...i graduated
2006-08-08 @Not logged in user@: Ha ha! You're sorry!
2006-08-08 [Sunrose]: This wiki has changed owner and can only be edited and commented on by Elftown members.
2006-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... this is my wiki!...*eats ramen*...
2006-08-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: ok...hi [Sunrose]
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi,[Sunrose].
2006-08-09 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *nods in sunroses direction*[Sunrose].
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I like children,they are cute.
2006-08-09 [nokaredes]: 09:58:58 Sunrose: This wiki has changed owner and can only be edited and commented on by Elftown members. Changed owner to who? ...and why? o_o
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: To me of course and you know why. Everyone here can still edit and comment though :)
2006-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You completely stole my freakin' wiki! Give it back!
2006-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...oh,yes and... *eats ramen*...
2006-08-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: *eats ramen* im bored
2006-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...my ramen! ...*eats ramen*...
2006-08-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: *pokes you* your to skinny
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: There are lots of other wikis that are freely editable by not logged in users... why don't you steal them? Or is it me you're after? Because I don't see what harm there is in talking on here... if you don't like seeing me then stop coming here. You have no business on this wiki, and I'd like you left it alone. Yes, I was banned... for... "being annoying" was it? Or just being stupid? So what... you steal my best friend's wiki? I offered to stay off Elftown for three months and restrict myself to this wiki as long as you wouldn't ban me. You said you'd consider it. The very next day, I checked and saw I was banned. Do us all a favor and obey Elftown's number one rule... Don't be an asshole.
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: That wasn't the deal actually. You agreed that you would stay off of Elftown for 3 months, only commenting as a -not logged in member- on this wiki. Thus I figured that in the mean time, you would not need that clone and banned it. You broke the deal by even 'checking' that clone, because we agreed you wouldn't use -any- houses.
If the banning itself was a misunderstanding, it doesn't change the fact you weren't supposed to log in on it and then start to use more clonehouses. Despite the fact you tried to log in, I thought the deal was still on. Until I found more clones in use. This whilst I had spoken to [nokaredes] and she said she'd explain it to you on MSN.
You ruined it for yourself.
Also, we already discussed why you were banned in the past. I wanted to give you a chance, but you can't stop yourself.
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: ...*picks nose*... you... wouldn't want to try for a four monther now, would yah?
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: You wouldn't have noticed I had banned your clone if you had not checked it like you promised. You broke the deal, I have no reason what so ever to give you another deal.
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: I didn't "check" it... I was gonna log in one more time to finish my daily activities, but found I was already banned...
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: Quote: 'The very next day, I checked and saw I was banned.' You call it that yourself and from what you just wrote, that IS considered checking.
You finalised the deal with your agreement, thus the deal started from then on. Not a day later for some odd reason.
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: Actually, I just sent a rather large thumb sticking up... I tried to get on to see If you had replied to the thumb... You never said it was starting that day...
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: It was pretty much a final message. You also still had means to ask me what happened, like having [nokaredes] contact me. Instead you continue as before.
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: ...because you said you wouldn't ban me and you did ban me... one would only assume that would have meant the deal was off... though, as I said before... the deal was never really... "on"...
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: I actually meant I'd consider letting you back on Elftown, instead of permanently banning you. That is where we apparantly had a misunderstanding. A misunderstanding that would not have mattered much if you had not logged onto your account. Your last message was final: there was -nothing- more to say. When you noticed your house was banned, you could've handled it like I said.
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: But... [nokaredes] has better things to do than act as my proxy!
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: And if you'll notice, on that username I did nothing... other than talk to people and donate to the Elftown Herald...
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: Those are the lamest excuses.
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: ...as for the other username... yeah... thaaat should be banned...
2006-08-09 [Тhе Bad Turkey]: I'm a turkey of my word... When I was banned for stealing art, I said I never would again. And I didn't! ...just like the time I was banned for harassing, spamming... and... other stuff... uh... wait, this isn't helping...
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Listen so what if The Bad Turkey is annoying,I'm annoying too,and whoever reported him as annoying should have blocked him,and if he continued to be annoying on the wikis they should have delt with it,The Bad Turkey is annoying,but he is also funny,and Gibson is as annoying but I live with him being annoying so can you.(Sorry for interferingt,but The Bad Turkey is my friend.)YAY FOR WEIRD AND ANNOYING PEOPLE!!
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: The rules apply to your friend too, whether he's funny or not. It looks like you don't even know what he did. As he admitted himself above, he kept violating our rules one way or another. If he can't comply to them despite being given many chances, he doesn't belong here.
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I read what was above,but I didn't know that I just found that out.
2006-08-09 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Reading all that I agree with the bad turkey. He was checking because you said you would consider it and wanted to know if you agreed.
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: You read all the messages? That's impressive, considering you don't have access to them. He agreed in a final message, after I said I'd consider it and after I proposed the deal and discussed it with him.
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-08-09 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Acording to up there HE proposed the idea. And if you did tell him that you agreed then you should have said that earlier.
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-08-09 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I'm sorry Misty but I cant stand when people abuse there power.
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2006-08-09 [Xeroh Kanoe]: The guards.
2006-08-09 [Sunrose]: You just proved you don't know what you're talking about with that comment. I told him I would consider letting him stay here, if he agreed to my proposal: a 3 month period of him leaving Elftown alone. He agreed to the proposal. I replied with terms and conditions, whereafter he replied in agreement -again- and henceforth finalized the deal.
2006-08-09 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I must have missread sorry.
2006-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-08-10 [Sunrose]: I totally forgot about this yesterday, but when I banned his clone I actually also wrote a very clear bancomment. There was no way he could've misunderstood me, because this is what he saw when he tried to log in again:
'[name clone]' banned. 3 Months no trouble and you'll be unbanned.
Date: 2006-07-21 00:16:48
2006-08-11 [The Bad Turkеy]: I agreed, but the deal was never finalized... And what username did you write that on...? I thought that it was [Tizurkey] I was talking to you on...
2006-08-11 [Sunrose]: It was finalized in my opinion. Plus you were perfectly able to conclude the finalization from reading the bancomment. And despite the fact you claim you don't want to use [nokaredes] as a messenger, that did actually happen several times. Thus there was no reason for you to not do it again.
Wow, it's pretty lame you don't remember. That memoryloss is probably also why you don't recall exactly how things actually went. That only happens when it's convenient for you of course.
In the past you pretended to not know the reasons of your banning. Then above you actually write all sorts of reasons down, in a joking manner.
2006-08-11 [Thе Bad Turkеy]: If it wasn't [Tizurkey], then what was it? I checked most of 'em and saw nothing... one of them did have a "bancomment" but there was nothing typed there...
2006-08-11 [Sunrose]: Since you logged in on it the next day to 'check', you should know. That's what you get when creating tons of useless houses xD


And actually [Tizurkey] reads the following bancomment:
'Tizurkey' banned. You don't need these clones, if you leave 3 Elftown alone for 3 months you will be unbanned.'
Date: 2006-07-24 02:07:53
I just tried logging in as [Tizurkey] to make sure and that comment is what I get to see.
There's no loophole in what I did, you fucked up.
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep,he sure did.(sorry The Bad Turkey,but [Sunrose] dose have a point)
2006-08-11 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I agree with misty.
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: why thank you
2006-08-11 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Its kinda hard to argue with [Sunrose], I tried.
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-08-11 [Xeroh Kanoe]: You have any run ins with the guards.
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: who me?*looks inocent*
2006-08-11 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *narrows eyes at you*
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,I got in trouble cause I had a banner with hermione on it when I first came here.
2006-08-11 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Thats stupid.
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: well sunrose said that it was still emma as hermione and to fix it.
2006-08-11 [Xeroh Kanoe]: She seems like the only guard that actually does anything.
2006-08-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah
2006-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Get off my wiki, you [Sunrose] supporting bimbos... *eats beef flavored ramen*....
2006-08-12 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Not suporting, agreeing. But if you want me to go then....bye.
2006-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Agreeing?!?!! That's even worse!
2006-08-12 [Xeroh Kanoe]: No agreeing has to do with only one veiw not all of them.
2006-08-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: *eats ramen*
2006-08-12 [nokaredes]: [Mortified Penguin] is always yelling at people to get off of "his" wiki... just ignore him...
2006-08-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know
2006-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: bye
2006-08-13 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Adios.
2006-08-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: see you
2006-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2006-08-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: never mind
2006-08-15 [sara(:]: dustin likes to rape his miniature thrift store bought statue of Beethoven... just thought that was wanted to be known...
2006-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...well... it does have that little hole in the bottom... *eats ramen*... gimme my wiki!
2006-08-15 [sunabozu]: yo
2006-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!????!!!!
2006-08-16 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...?
2006-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Wassup?!?!!
2006-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you 'hi' me, woman...
2006-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]:


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: Sweet crunchy blang blang...


2005-07-21 Mortified Penguin: "crunchy and delicious, are you feeling ambitious?"


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: yes... I am!


2005-07-21 Murderdolls chick: la la la la la la la la elmos world


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: *assassinates Elmo*


2005-07-21 Mortified Penguin: Elmo was banned in Mexico for "nudity"......


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: Again?! ...I thought he had reformed...?


2005-07-21 Mortified Penguin: No, that was Big Bird....


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: oh... ok...


2005-07-21 Mortified Penguin: But he got banned anyway......you know, illegal drug trafficing.......


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: yeah... I saw that on the daily news... there was a big police chase... he was five miles from the border with his hostage... the cookie monster... when he drove off the edge of a bridge... may the cookie monster rest in pieces...


2005-07-21 Mortified Penguin: or at least the cookies......... mmmmm...... cookies......


2005-07-21 Sagacious Turkey: riiiiight...


2005-07-21 Mortified Penguin: *Gives Bob a 30-minute break*......*is working at the cash register*...........*the chickens barge in and steal the floorboards*.........wait....... those aren't floorboards.......*twitches*.......


2005-07-22 Misty1: hi


2005-07-22 jumpy little pixie: sooooooooooo


2005-07-22 Misty1: [Sagacious Turkey],I have a new picture up I am in it,you can go look.(I am the girl at the very end)


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: *the deranged cow bursts in* "Udderly lovely! Moo hoo ha haa!!!"


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: What?! Bob! Take the cow into the back to be made into Saturday's special!


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: *Bob wrestles the cow to the floorboardless floor*


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: ...right... so... how is everyone...?


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: *loud screams errupt from the back room*


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: ...Now we have Tuesday's special, too!


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: *the hulk bursts through the ceiling*


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: *smacks head* ...not again!


2005-07-22 Sagacious Turkey: Bad Hulk! Bad boy! *whaps the Hulk with a newspaper*






2005-08-09 Sagacious Turkey: Show me a girl who doesn't like cats and I'll show you a boy in disguise as a girl...


2005-08-09 Acidic Khemica: I dont like cats...


2005-08-09 Sagacious Turkey: ...I knew it!!!


2005-08-09 Acidic Khemica: .....


2005-08-09 Sagacious Turkey: riiiiiight...






2005-08-15 Mind Freak: LoL.................I need [...........Blood........]..............


2005-08-15 Sagacious Turkey: *hands darkness wolf a box of cheerios* ...here's that cereal box you asked for...


2005-08-15 Sagacious Turkey: *eats rock*


2005-08-15 Mind Freak: What cereal?.....I did not ask for that....I asked for blood.............


2005-08-15 Sagacious Turkey: riiiiiiiiiiight... enjoy your cereal!






2005-08-20 nokaredes: Popcorn? *offers the wolves some*


2005-08-20 Sagacious Turkey: mmm... popcorn...


2005-08-20 nokaredes: *gifts you some*


2005-08-20 Sagacious Turkey: *eats popcorn* ...ooo... it's even better than "poopcorn"!






2005-08-28 Mind Freak: Hello.....Whats up All?


2005-08-28 Sagacious Turkey: Rickety ceilings! ...*the ceilings crumble and fall on you*...


2005-08-28 Mind Freak: Damnit Turkey....I thought you said that you was going to get this diner fixed.....LoL


2005-08-28 Sagacious Turkey: hmm... I recall not, that of which you speak...






2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: The manager's room is mine, stupid! *kicks the wall scum and tells it evrything will be alright*...


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: ...blasphemer!


2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: ...plebian!


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: ...Speak for yourself, helot!


2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: You dissin' me, serf?!


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: It would appear so, villein!


2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: Villain?! Where?! Darn usurper!


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: Liar! ...if anything you'd be the usurper... *mutters something about "my manager's room"*... supplanter...


2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: I was the founder of Bob's Diner, mind you! And that's my manager's room...... you're the assistant manager, peasant! ....."middle-class" my butt.......


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: It never would have come into existence if it wasn't for me! ...and it would have soon thereafter died if it wasn't for me... bucolic...


2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: No, the wiki would have come into existence, not the name......CHANGE THE NAME!!!!!! I'm about to get all the rights for Bob's Diner reserved.......destitute peasant!


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: Ha! ...you can't, fool...


2005-08-31 Mortified Penguin: Yeah, I can...... I just won't get the things named bob's diner before I came up with Bob's Diner, idiot! If it's popsicle, it's possible! (and it's most deffinetively popsicle.....)


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: We'll see... oh yes... we'll see... *eats a popsicle*


2005-08-31 nokaredes: *feels like she missed something*


2005-08-31 Sagacious Turkey: Nah... just the usual chatter...






2005-09-03 nokaredes: Shouldn't you change that comment up top about [Gosu]...? Since he/she/it is banned now...?


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: Allie, Allie, Allie... If I change that, then I'll feel obligated to change all the stupid unnecessary comments, several food items regarding my mother, the specials picture, and most of all that darned lymerick by Chavez...


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: *shakes fist at Mort* ...he's lucky I was too lazy to take that off...


2005-09-04 nokaredes: ...Did you just say my name three times in a patronising way?


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: Uh... er... no...?


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: ...I was talking to the other Allie! *points at the other Allie* *she waves*






2005-09-04 Angelic Nightmares: *sits alone in a corner and changes into her wolf form and howls*


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: *points at the "No Howling" sign on the door*


2005-09-04 Angelic Nightmares: *rips the sign off the door and shreds it*


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: *points at the sign on the wall, "No Ripping Off Signs!"* ...*points at the fine print, "All violators will be prosecuted to the full extent of my imagination!"*...


2005-09-04 Angelic Nightmares: *ish not afraid*


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: hmm... *thinks*... you'll be forced to... read Barry Cotter and the Sorcerer's Bone!


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: *waits for the scream of terror*


2005-09-04 Angelic Nightmares: Why would I read that?


2005-09-04 Sagacious Turkey: *the Bob's Diner Police Department burst in and tackle you* "Swarm, swarm!!!"






2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: *large gasp* *coughs*... *also gets out cattleprod*


2005-09-07 nokaredes: *gets a bigger cattleprod*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: You still have your skill, but your power fades. Prepare to meet the force, [nokaredes]... *gets another cattleprod* *twirls both cattleprods*


2005-09-07 nokaredes: O_O *prods you while you're busy showing off*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: *collapses*


2005-09-07 nokaredes: *cheers*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: *crawls towards your feet inconspicuously*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: *chomps your big toe*


2005-09-07 nokaredes: *kicks you in the head*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: *dies from severe brain trauma*


2005-09-07 nokaredes: Oh, come on...


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: Shame... you murderer... *points at the guy that was fighting with you that was not me in any way*


2005-09-07 nokaredes: Ack! Parallel universe! *jumps out the nearest window*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: Not again! *jumps out the window* *hits the ground*... Darn half-story window...


2005-09-07 nokaredes: Why isn't B's D taller?


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: And why isn't there indoor plumbing...? And why does no one care for Bob...? And why is there a gang of FREAKIN' CHICKENS THAT DRAG RANDOM PEOPLE INTO THE STREETS?! ...*ahem*... the world may never know...






2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: I wonder where I'd be if I had decided to be called The Bad Chicken... *scratches chin and wonders*


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: "*the gang of turkeys burst in and drag [Mortified Penguin] into the streets*"


2005-09-07 nokaredes: O_o He's not even here!


2005-09-07 Sagacious Turkey: So...? ...he's on layaway...






2005-09-11 Angelic Nightmares: *puts her head on the bar and closes her eyes* I've lost him....or at least that's how I feel.....I told him I'd wait forever, he thinks I'm mad at him......Mallorys trying to start shit between us.......God what am I supposed to do??????????


2005-09-11 Sagacious Turkey: That's terrible! ...he still plans to be a member of Bob's Diner, right...?






2005-09-11 Angelic Nightmares: *watches as tears hit the bar* My real name starts with an 'M' that mean you don't like me either? *smiles slighty at what you said about Mallory*


2005-09-11 Sagacious Turkey: Darn you! Can't you read?! *points at the sign, "No crying on the bar!"*


2005-09-11 nokaredes: I thought your name was 'Ron, Ginger, Ging, and Gingy'. ._.


2005-09-11 Angelic Nightmares: *spits on the sign* I don't care anymore.....Richard seems to hate me.....and nothing else matters anymore.....nothing does


2005-09-11 nokaredes: :O Lotsa stuff matters!


2005-09-11 Sagacious Turkey: *points at the other sign, "Don't spit at the signs!"* *shakes fist*... besides... if he doesn't care enough to be with you now, he wouldn't care enough to stay with you even if you were together...
2006-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Some good old classic boob's diner comments... er... I mean.....boob's.
2006-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: 15 days 'til the 2 year anniversay of b's d, morons! uh.... I mean... customers! And yo... sunny... change the special of the day... and stop deleting comments...
2006-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: *poke*
2006-08-16 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...
2006-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-08-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME
2006-08-17 [Fearathress]: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU........VEARI! HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!
2006-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Happy birthday,[Fallen Child Athena]
2006-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and you smell like one too!
2006-08-18 [Fearathress]: lol!
2006-08-19 [PixieStickChick]: Smelly turkey feces on your face.
2006-08-19 [PixieStickChick]: Dustin likes my cheese fingers...
2006-08-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: thanks everyone
2006-08-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your welcome [Fallen Child Athena]*stares at everyone*
2006-08-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: so whats up?
2006-08-20 [Fearathress]: Your welcome [Vearie] * stares at [Mity1]*
2006-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: What up, pixiestickdick?! ...*eats ramen*...
2006-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Long time, no smell...
2006-08-21 [PixieStickChick]: Why is there a story on the main page? =|
2006-08-21 [PixieStickChick]: [pixiestickdick] how clever dear. Come up with that all by yourself? lol
2006-08-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: im bored
2006-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: no... my mommy helpeded me...
2006-08-22 [Thе Bad Turkeу]: Ha ha! You have a mom... PIXIE!! ...WHAT UP?! ...suuuure... come back after I get banned... darn you... *shakes fist*
2006-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Sunny don't come back 'til the third! Ha ha! Sunrose sucks! ...she's a dimwitted, four-eyed, fat, blonde, loser who has no direction in life and will be incredibly lucky to ever have kids. Assuming the government doesn't step in and get rid of the little abominations... Assuming she ever has 'em of course... though I seriously doubt that any man that still can see would come close to her... I mean, look at that face! ...was she run over by something? ...*eats ramen*...
2006-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and if she somehow reads this... can I have my wiki back?
2006-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: As the old mother goose rhyme goes... "Sunrose is an old quack who needs a boot up her crack!"
2006-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Her grotesque and unattractive crack, might I add...
2006-08-23 [Fearathress]: LOL
2006-08-23 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *pokes a nearby person.*
2006-08-24 [sara(:]: dustin's a fag. there i said it.
2006-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...so true...
2006-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmm...
2006-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! You were together?!
2006-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you 'yo' at me, young lady... or I'll... OR I'LL... EAT SOME FREAKIN' RAMEN!!! ...*eats ramen*...
2006-08-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ......?
2006-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*
2006-08-25 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *pokes misty with a fork covered in ramen.*
2006-08-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ow,no poking.*eats ramen*
2006-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...gimme dat ramen! *steals ramen*... *smacks you*... *eats ramen*... mmm... good...
2006-08-26 [Fearathress]: NOw it is a ramen war?
2006-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: There will be no wars in my ramen kingdom, for this is a land of peace. ...*fires missiles at neighboring countries*... *raises taxes*... *invades foreign soil*... I repeat, peaceful nation.
2006-08-26 [Fearathress]: lol *takes ramen and thros it a neighboring coybtrues*
2006-08-26 [PixieStickChick]: HAHA you got banned! SUCKA! What'd you do? =P
2006-08-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *takes back ramen from penguin and then pokes him in the eye with a fork.*
2006-08-26 [PixieStickChick]: That's not nice. *uppercuts shadow and runs off with the ramen*
2006-08-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: That was my ramen to begin with! *Chases after Pixie*
2006-08-26 [PixieStickChick]: Psshhh. Not anymore. *vanishes*
2006-08-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *Hits pixie with some ramen just before she vanishes.*
2006-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen off the ground*... mmm... flavorful... douche bag, I mean, turkey got banned for... I don't know, actually... the guards were bored, I guess...
2006-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo!
2006-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you, David... *eats ramen*...
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*while we are eating let's enjoy a nice funny clip.


5




4




3




2




1





2006-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... that was disturbing... so disturbing... that I'll never eat ramen again! ...*eats ramen*... never! I swear! ...*eats more ramen*...
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eat's ramen*cool let's watch another.


  

2006-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Shin-chan is awesome!
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2006-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: You know, man?! ...on Adult Swim...?!
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh


  

2006-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*... man, I can't wait to poo that...
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eat's ramen* yep
2006-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Action Bastard!
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2006-08-27 [sara(:]: omg. i watched that last night.
2006-08-27 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...
2006-08-27 [sara(:]: Shin-Chan.... i can't wait to poo this..
2006-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol*eats ramen*
2006-09-01 [nokaredes]: I got a new cat... I have a picture in my drawing slot right now...
2006-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok*eats ramen*
2006-09-02 [weasel2]: aaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
2006-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi [weasel2]
2006-09-02 [weasel2]: hello
2006-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: why were you screaming?
2006-09-02 [weasel2]: becuse i can
2006-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: is it because I was eating ramen?
2006-09-02 [weasel2]: you got it hes load
2006-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've been talking to The bad turkey for too long.
2006-09-02 [weasel2]: yes
2006-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: dang
2006-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2006-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi*eats ramen*I LOVE NARUTO*eats more ramen*
2006-09-03 [nokaredes]: *shoots Naruto* I've always wanted to do that :3
2006-09-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *watches and eats ramen*...Whats with our obsession with ramen?
2006-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I started the ramen obsession, darnit!... *eats ramen*...
2006-09-04 [sara(:]: too much forking ramen.
2006-09-05 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: lol ramen *eats ramen* RAMEN WILL SOON RULE THE WORLD, MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!!!!!!!


2006-09-05 [sara(:]: not before me.
2006-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*... Crocodile Hunter! Nooooo!!
2006-09-06 [sunabozu]: pee
2006-09-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *brings Naruto back to life.Hi,Naruto.Naruto:hi,Misty*hugs Misty*Misty:*hands Naruto some Ramen,and eats some ramen*
2006-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*harpoons Naruto*...
2006-09-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Harpoons Mortified Penguin,and brings Naruto back,again*
2006-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but... that was really Naruto you just harpooned! ...he was in disguise as me...
2006-09-07 [weasel2]: runs in and hides from a bear
2006-09-07 [sunabozu]: ohhh
2006-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *tells the bear where you went*
2006-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AoYxfPcVLAw
2006-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ayEA5megwE0&NR
2006-09-08 [Xeroh Kanoe]: [Tristin Blade]and [Bloody Remnant] are the same person.
2006-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... I've never heard of either of them... *eats ramen*...
2006-09-08 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Better be prepared so.
2006-09-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mortified Penguin,I'll bite you if don't stop anoyying me,BELIEVE IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wh- what the hack?! ...what did I do?!!
2006-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats Naruto's severed limbs in his ramen* ...mmm... that's good ramen!
2006-09-09 [nokaredes]: 
2006-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *bites [Mortified Penguin]*
2006-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ewwww... get it off! Get it off! *shakes leg*
2006-09-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ha*hugs Naruto close to me*
2006-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*mutters*... good... now I can take 'em both out with one shot...
2006-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *disappears with Naruto before he can*
2006-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *hires some clowns to kill you*
2006-09-12 [sara(:]: clowns frighten me...
2006-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a clown at you*
2006-09-12 [sunabozu]: *lights a fag*
2006-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills the clowns*
2006-09-13 [sara(:]: dumb clowns...
2006-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs evily and hugs Naruto close*
2006-09-14 [PixieStickChick]: o.o
2006-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiight...*eats ramen*...
2006-09-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen with Naruto*
2006-09-15 [sara(:]: .:hurls a rock at Naruto and smacks him in the head:.
2006-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws a boulder at you*My Naruto!
2006-09-15 [sara(:]: .:dodges boulder:. I don't want him. I just fet like chunking a rock at him.
2006-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: No touching,my Naruto.*hugs Naruto close*
2006-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: sara, sara, sara... what happened to you...? You used to throw knives... now rocks? ...for shame...
2006-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ready to ride the pharaoh again this year?
2006-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-09-15 [sunabozu]: *giigles* they g(o)ne do it
2006-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...*eats Ramen*
2006-09-15 [sunabozu]: *lights a cig and playes with knife*
2006-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen with Naruto*
2006-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats naruto*... you know...? Spiral fishcakes...?
2006-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*jumps inside of [Mortified Penguin] and grabs Naruto then comes back out through the mouth*gross I'm covered in slober.*takes a shower* Naruto:*also takes a shower*
2006-09-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sp- spiral fishcakes!!
2006-09-16 [.Toxic Valentine.]: great wiki lol .
2006-09-16 [Mortified Penguin]: This wiki sucks... go to maze of guile!
2006-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELL NO*eats ramen with Naruto*
2006-09-17 [sara(:]: hush up. i had no knives on me. oh yes. i will ride that pharaoh.
2006-09-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats Ramen*
2006-09-19 [weasel2]: awwwwwwwwww runs
2006-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs [weasel2]*I missed you
2006-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...all your mothers...
2006-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]:
CROSSFADE LYRICS




Cold






Looking back at me I see
That I never really got it right
I never stopped to think of you
I'm always wrapped up in
Things I cannnot win
You are the antidote that gets me by
Something strong
Like a drug that gets me high




What I really meant to say
Is I'm sorry for the way I am
I never meant to be so cold to you




And I'm sorry about all the lies
Maybe in a different light
You could see me stand on my own again
Cause now i can see
You were the antidote that got me by
Something strong like a drug that got me high
I never meant to be so cold




I never really wanted you to see
The screwed up side of me that I keep
Locked inside of me so deep
It always seems to get to me
I never really wanted you to go
So many things you should have known
I guess for me theres just no hope
I never meant to be so cold
2006-09-20 [sara(:]: such an old song.
2006-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, that so freakin' sucks... yo Sara! I just got back from the fair! ...the pharaoh was asking about you...
2006-09-20 [nokaredes]: ...yesterday I had 10+ cups of coffee from Starbucks... so... guess what I didn't do last night?!
2006-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...maintain good bladder control?
2006-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *looks away*
2006-09-21 [nokaredes]: ......
2006-09-21 [~Crimson Angel~]:
Song: Only One Lyrics






Broken this fragile thing now
And I can't, I can't pick up the pieces
And I've thrown my words all around
But I can't, I can't give you a reason




I feel so broken up (so broken up)
And I give up (I give up)
I just want to tell you so you know




Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you
You are my only, my only one




Made my mistakes, let you down
And I can't, I can't hold on for too long
Ran my whole life in the ground
And I can't, I can't get up when you're gone




And something's breaking up (breaking up)
I feel like giving up (like giving up)
I won't walk out until you know




Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you
You are my only one
I let go, but there's just no one that gets me like you
You are my only my only one




Here I go so dishonestly
Leave a note for you my only one
And I know you can see right through me
So let me go and you will find someone




Here I go, scream my lungs out and try to get to you


You are my only one


I let go, but there's just no one, no one like you


You are my only, my only one


My only one


My only one


My only one


You are my only, my only one
2006-09-21 [sara(:]: Yough fatty. i had to get blood drawn today. dhfgsdj SUCKED
2006-09-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ha ha! ...did they miss and hit a vein?
2006-09-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: awwwwwwwwwwwwwww,poor you.*hugs [Sara]*
2006-09-26 [nokaredes]: I gave blood willingly on the day you wrote that comment...
2006-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-09-29 [sunabozu]: XD XD XD XD XD XD!!!!!!!!
2006-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: is she crazy?
2006-09-30 [nokaredes]: ...nobody knows...
2006-09-30 [nokaredes]: I heard Turkey broke his computer...
2006-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: why?
2006-09-30 [nokaredes]: "Why" what? I don't think he did it on purpose, if that's what you're asking...
2006-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Turkey can go suck a tree stump... whatever that means... *eats ramen*...
2006-09-30 [nokaredes]: ...if you don't know what it means, than it takes a lot less effort not to say it.
2006-10-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *punches Mortified Penguin*DON'T TALK ABOUT TURKEY LIKE THAT,YOU ASSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2006-10-04 [sunabozu]: hey
2006-10-04 [nokaredes]: ...did you use enough exclamation points, Misty1?
2006-10-05 [sara(:]: not enough of them.
2006-10-05 [sunabozu]: two timin touchin broken bones
2006-10-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*is pissed*
2006-10-06 [sunabozu]: heheheheheheheheh what did the five fingers say to the face?
2006-10-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: slap?
2006-10-07 [nokaredes]: I only know what one finger says...
2006-10-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-10-09 [sara(:]: i want the fullmetal alchemist book tomorrow.
2006-10-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-10-10 [sara(:]: that was toward jr.
2006-10-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: k
2006-10-11 [nokaredes]: Jr. has a message box, you know...
2006-10-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmm...
2006-10-11 [sara(:]: i wasn't meaning to be rude, misty. just a bad day. i have a lot of those now.
2006-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-10-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: im having many bad days
2006-10-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: why?
2006-10-13 [sara(:]: hahahha. i have the book. x.x and i finished it. x.x
2006-10-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmm...come again?
2006-10-13 [sara(:]: fullmetal alchemist manga. vol.1. yeah. i've been trying to get it from dustin and jr. for a week and i finally got it. ^_^
2006-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I told you he had it in his car...
2006-10-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I WANT TO READ IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*gets on knees and begs*
2006-10-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: misty, i will message you about it ok?
2006-10-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: NEW ITEM IN Appetizers
2006-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: k
2006-10-17 [nokaredes]: ...I'm on vicodin...
2006-10-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: what is that?
2006-10-18 [nokaredes]: A pain killer with some really interesting side effects...
2006-10-18 [Panty Bandit]: ...freakin' losers... talk more, 'for I go all Shaq on you...
2006-10-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-10-18 [Panty Bandit]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*... *the chickens burst in and drag veari into the streets*...
2006-10-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Shaq??
2006-10-19 [Panty Bandit]: ...Shaq!!
2006-10-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: k...
2006-10-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: *the turkey run in and smack [Panty Bandit] in the face*
2006-10-19 [Panty Bandit]: Bi', I am the turkey! *pimp slaps you*
2006-10-19 [nokaredes]: ...panty bandit?
2006-10-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: *Penguins burst in the diner and take [Panty Bandit] out back and throws them on the roof* ha now what?
2006-10-19 [Panty Bandit]: ...uh... who said anything about a roof...?
2006-10-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: I DID
2006-10-19 [Panty Bandit]: ...suuure you did... *pats your back*...
2006-10-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hands you a pair of pantys* there.......now you wont have to steal mine
2006-10-19 [Panty Bandit]: ...cho' mama!
2006-10-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: WHAT?
2006-10-19 [Panty Bandit]: *picks nose*... huh?
2006-10-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*
2006-10-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs [Panty Bandit]*HA I STOLE THE PANTIES BACK AND GAVE THEM TO THEIR RIGHTFUL OWNERS!
2006-10-21 [Panty Bandit]: ...and did we forget about our own? *holds up misty's panties*... yeesh, woman... how much cotton had to die for these things...?!
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY!*punches [Panty Bandit] in the face and takes them back*these are my mom's
2006-10-21 [Panty Bandit]: ...uh huh... uh huh... suuure...
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: FUCK YOU!
2006-10-21 [Panty Bandit]: ...quite frankly, my dear... I would rather not... *eats ramen, yo*
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW,That isn't what I meant.
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *sees talk of panty theives and wonders at it*
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: here watch this.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6910fHvy5E0
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *watches while she down load FurC yet again*
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: woot! woot! it finally worked!!
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-10-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ^_^
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: 0.0 *is already getting offers to cyber and isnt even in FurN* ...
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2006-10-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: intresting
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2006-10-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is so happy*
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why?
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: I went bowling with my friends,and I haven't done that in the longest time.
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: why not?
2006-10-21 [Panty Bandit]: ...bowling?! ...with?! ...friends?!
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes panty some people have actual lives
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol I didn't have time to go bowling before.
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i wish i could go bowling... i dont have the time though. when i use to i bowled a 147
2006-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: REALLY??O_O
2006-10-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yuppers. i always just aimed for the center arrow on the floor. 80% of the time youll get a strike, when you pick yuo the spare just aim straight down the arrow that will give you the most pins. atleast thats how i do it
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cool,thanks for the advice.
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: your welcome. always glad if i can help people
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: ^_^
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *searches for convo subject now* << ^^ >>
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmm...
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: any good movies coming out soon?
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmm...idk
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...Saw III.
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: heard its not as good as the other two... havent seen any previews for it though
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i went to the wiki in your mood and it just kept going and going and going but that was after my heathen gods pooped on me
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...but, of course...
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i was jut ate by Christianites... o.0
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'll go to the wiki*has nothing better to do,so leaves*
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...they tend to do that... misty... haven't you already been to maze of guile?!
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: shoulda never trusted fed ex anyways...
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: no*innocent look*,who is Elton John?
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: Jesus's brother-in-law...
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO HE ISN'T!
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...suuuuure he isn't... *pats your back*
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...when in doubt, click Alt+F4!
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO!*punches [Panty Bandit] in the face,steals his wallet,and clothes,and runs away*
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: least you still have your shoes
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...a few simple flaws in your plan... I don't carry a wallet, I'm nude, and I am faceless...
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: FINE THEN!*punches you wherever I can*and steals anything you got and runs off*
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *eats popcorn and watches*
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty:*punches the nearest guy and steals his,wallet,clothes,and shoes,then runs away*
Lee:HEY,GIVE MY STUFF BACK!*hides in a barrel*
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.0 *munch munch*
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty:*laughs comes back kidnaps Lee,and leaves again*
Lee:I'M NAKED AND SHE JUST KIDNAPED ME,AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH,RAPE RAPE!HELP ME!
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *dances all by her lonesome* my milkshake bring all the boys to the yard, and their like its better than yours, damn right its better than yours, i could teach you but id have to charge. lala la la la the boys are waiting... lala la la
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: ...I do believe your milkshake has spoiled...
2006-10-22 [Panty Bandit]: *the gang of chickens burst in and begin break-dancing on the counter*
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: [5 days later]
News lady:A girl has kidnapped a boy named Rock Lee,if you have any information on the name and where abouts of the two call your local police immediately.
2006-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo!
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey guys.
2006-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ?! Who are you?
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty you dumbbutt.
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: asdfghtc;nhjf,jgedc ercju,kr
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh??
2006-10-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shrugs* i dunno. i just needed something to say
2006-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,ok
2006-10-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: HEY ALL I'M BACK!!
2006-10-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY!
2006-10-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Lol thanks
2006-10-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs*
2006-10-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles-
2006-10-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wait,I don't know you,do I?
2006-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, I know all of you! (except Misty1)
2006-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Did you lose your memory?
2006-10-27 [crowdel]: check out short story duelists
2006-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...me are stupid.
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: That was Dustin... He copied my name... I mean- no, no he didn't!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...yes... I didn't... *eats ramen*... it- it's an illusion! ...now... let's go tie David up and roll him down that crater...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: This isn't confusing anyone since we are the only ones that know about the confusion... *eats ramen*...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...we...? ...who is we? ...there is no we... we are one... though... we can't be one if there is no we! ........wait........ what?!!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I want my Sgt. Frog, then... *eats ramen*...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...you have your Sgt. Frog... and my Beethoven... and the lesser known Shoe Bert...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: *sits down*
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: It's Schubert, you idiot!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: Wh- what?! ...who's that other feller?! ...*eats Shoe Bert flavored ramen*...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know... someone who sat down?
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...you're overexaggerating...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: *tilts head*hmm......
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...it's tilting it's head now! .....run!!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Killer, this may seem confusing, but we're two people... two Mortified Penguins...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: *stands up* o,are you a girl or a boy
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...what you talkin' 'bout, Jimmy?!! ...*eats squirrel ramen*...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: whats going on!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, there are two Killers...*eats ramen*...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...this coming from the creater of hitmen united...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: hey you have my username
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...n-no I don't! You have my username!
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: i'll check it out
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: well its must be a coencedence
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...go to maze of guile... darn name copier...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: No... he can change his name to anyone else's, and so can you!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: Darn straight...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Eats ramen*
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...my ramen! ...*eats leachy cornflakes*... mmm... leacherific!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo! When yo' mama goin' to pick ya' up, Joe?
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: damn i wish i had good lives like you guys
2006-10-28 [see you!]: I dunno! .....what?! Pick me up?! ...my mom's droppin' me off... yo mom's gonna take me home! ...you whore... darn you, Moe...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...yes... we're Self-Proclaimed Entrepreneurs...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: noooooo, yo mom's goin' to pick ya' up, ho. Speakin' of ho, where is yo ho?!
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: but i live in a plce where you have to learn how tho defend yourself buy the age of 4
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...my ho?!! MY HO?!!! ...I dunno... somewhere... *picks nose*... I told you my mom was gonna drop me off tomorrow... and yo' mom was gonna take me home Monday!
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: DUDE WTF?!DID THE BAD TURKEY HACK INTO SUNROSE'S ACCOUNT,CAUSE HE EATS RAMEN,AND SUNROSE DOESN'T I SHOULD KNOW,CAUSE I TALK TO HER ALOT!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...the Ghettos?! ...heh... Spaghetto... stupid Lionel...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...Pipe down, Misty1 you little- ...er... I mean... sure! ...why not...
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH*runs around in circles screaming then attempts to run out the door but hits the wall and passes out*
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: You live in Canada? Spaghetto?! And who's Misty1?!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: Misty1...? Never heard of 'er...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: *eats ramen*
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets up*Ow my head.*rubs head*OH CRAP,I'm bleeding.*goes to the hospital and gets stitches*
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Who's Misty1, darnit?!
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: i live in canada on the blood reserve
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...misty1? ...I am misty1! ...*picks nose*... huck hayuck...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: What's the "blood reserve"?
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF?!DUDE STOP THAT!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...blah blah blah... me stupidful...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: its a place in alberta another name for it is the blood tribe
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...sounds fun...
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: YOU MOTHER FUCKER,I'M GOING TO KILL YOU GET YOUR OWN ACCOUNT,OH WAIT I FORGOT YOU ARE BANNED!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck...
2006-10-28 [sunabozu]: alongtime ago my people wre the most feared tribe in north amarica,i guess your cant change somthings
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: THE BAD TURKEY IS IN MY ACCOUNT!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...hmm? ...who's this misty1 guy...?
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Native Americans?
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: FUCK THIS SHIT!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ?!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...nooo... it's ff this shh!
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *lions kill you*... *eats ramen*...
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *has gone insane and has been taken away by guys in white coats while saying over and over*HE IS A HACKER HE IS A HACKER,AND HE STOLE MY UNDERWARE!
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...that's the third time that's happened today! ...I should really stop wearing this lion cologne...
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...I stole the underwear and dethread it... I made sixty shirts from that fabric! ...I soonthereafter burned all those shirts...
2006-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: UnderWARE?! ...hmm... sorta like software...
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *a gang of ninjas come in drag [Sagacious Turkey] into the streets and stab him with a kunai 5 times*
2006-10-28 [see you!]: ...exactly! ...only five times...? ...et... tu... kunai... *keels over dead*...
2006-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *does the hamster dance*


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9yDIq5wZmk&mode=related&search=
2006-10-30 [weasel2]: you know hamster
2006-10-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: gtg
2006-10-30 [weasel2]: fine
2006-11-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: If you are a fan of the show Naruto,go to my new wiki please,Naruto Lovers.IF YOU AREN'T DO NOT GO!*looks at [The Bad Turkey],and [see you!]*
2006-11-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: what?
2006-11-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sits at bar- hello all
2006-11-04 [sunabozu]: yo yo u yo
2006-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: hello
2006-11-04 [sunabozu]: whats new
2006-11-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know you 2
2006-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm...
2006-11-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-11-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: hey
2006-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: how are you?
2006-11-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: im ok
2006-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: that is good
2006-11-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: wow, slow down, if you guys start using sentences over 5 words i think i may faint from shock
2006-11-07 [nokaredes]: *doesn't bother reading all the comments she's missed*
2006-11-07 [nokaredes]: ...that was 8 words!
2006-11-07 [nokaredes]: And also it is [~Crimson Angel~]'s birthday.
2006-11-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -faints from shock-
2006-11-07 [sunabozu]: hey again!
2006-11-08 [nokaredes]: ...and [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice] has just passed out in B's D. o_o I would not have the same courage. *draws on [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]'s face with a permanent marker*
2006-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -snatches permanent marker- you brat!... -goes to find some rubbing alcohol-
2006-11-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-11-08 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: yaya laugh it up fuzz ball... -grumblegrumble. Rubs at marks on face until they come off-
2006-11-08 [sunabozu]: *slap*that was COLE BLUUDED!
2006-11-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: no im not a fuzz ball..unlike you
2006-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: MY B-DAY WAS YESTURDAY!
2006-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...rubbing alcohol?! ...ain't got none... I drank it all... *eats ramen*...
2006-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...happy birthday whoever you are! ...seriously... who the heck are you?
2006-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*My name is Mary Stacy a.k.a. [~Crimson Angel~],a.k.a. Misty-chan.
2006-11-09 [sunabozu]: hey hey ehy!
2006-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...huh?! ...who the hack is Mary Stacy?!!
2006-11-10 [sunabozu]: whats up,im just killin some time
2006-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: im bored
2006-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: -.-*jumps on top of [Mortified Penguin] and punches him 50 times in the face*
2006-11-10 [nokaredes]: ...I think Mort might be brain-dead ^_^
2006-11-10 [sara(:]: ...and Dustin's a fag... Just thought I would put that out there...
2006-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ah... it's good to be among friends... except that misty1 kid I don't know...
2006-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know her
2006-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...know who?
2006-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: misty1
2006-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who's misty1?
2006-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: a friend of mine
2006-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who's a friend of yours?
2006-11-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: never mind
2006-11-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *growls in anger*
2006-11-11 [weasel2]: pats mistys head
2006-11-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hugs [~Crimson Angel~]* its ok
2006-11-12 [Fallen Child Athena]: *hugs [~Crimson Angel~]* its ok
2006-11-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs back*he's annoying.
2006-11-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: i know
2006-11-13 [sunabozu]: hey
2006-11-13 [weasel2]: me
2006-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...how rude...
2006-11-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: well its true
2006-11-14 [nokaredes]: ..the Wii comes out in less than a week...
2006-11-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: the what?
2006-11-14 [sunabozu]: nintendo wii i heard its gonna suck but its still gonna be fun
2006-11-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: oh ok
2006-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Nintendo is the best! Too bad it doesn't have many Metal Gear Solid games... *eats ramen*...
2006-11-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea it is
2006-11-17 [sunabozu]: I GOT A PS3!!!!!!!!
2006-11-17 [Fallen Child Athena]: cool
2006-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...loser...
2006-11-21 [sunabozu]: im just kidding im getting one next year i heard that there are problems with it
2006-11-21 [Fallen Child Athena]:    we are all strange
2006-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn it! ...using emoticons is strictly forbiden in Bob's Diner on pain of death...
2006-11-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: did not know that
2006-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...now you know! And knowing is three fourths the battle.
2006-11-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: ummmm yea
2006-11-22 [Pillowthief]: Wow, I havent been here in a while...
2006-11-22 [Fallen Child Athena]: so how are you?
2006-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: hello
2006-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]:
http://www.petitiononline.com/2stupdvd/petition.html
2006-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that's right... click it...
2006-11-23 [Pillowthief]: That and Thundercats tshirts. Bring those back.
2006-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...screw the Thundercats! http://www.petitiononline.com/turkeyET/petition.html
2006-11-23 [Pillowthief]: Ack! Heretic!
2006-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who? ...me?!! ...*eats ramen*...
2006-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... Lion-o...
2006-11-23 [Pillowthief]: I think you mean jetarra. Liono is kinda hairy. :P
2006-11-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!  
2006-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks misty1* ...bi' what'd I say?!
2006-11-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: huh?.....no emotions
2006-11-24 [Insaniac Yoshie]: boo
2006-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2006-11-24 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *steals ramen*  
2006-11-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: *sigh*
2006-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks yoshie*
2006-11-27 [Fallen Child Athena]: read my diary
2006-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! You're older than me too?! ...well... as long as I'm older than misty...
2006-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you may think that because I'm a guy, I don't know what it's like to be pregnant... but that's not true. I too have a little creature growing inside, eating what I eat... 's called a tape worm. ...*eats ramen*... *tapeworm eats ramen*... aawww... so cuuuute!
2006-11-27 [Pillowthief]: Thats why Im so skinny. Forget dieting!
2006-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ye-uh! Tape Worm freaks united!...
2006-11-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: i lost my baby
2006-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...so soon?
2006-11-28 [Pillowthief]: I lose my babies all the time. Poor things, my mom keeps on eating them.
2006-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I just can't remember where I put mine...
2006-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*makes origami cranes*... what am I doing?! ...I'm a man! ...*makes origami boobs*...
2006-11-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: yes so soon..i was only 6 weeks
2006-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty's first ever comment... "2005-02-05 Misty1: Hi"
2006-11-29 [Fallen Child Athena]: what was mine?
2006-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I dunno... I just randomly found that one...
2006-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the gang of chickens burst in and order some French Bread*...
2006-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the pride of lions kick in the door and start brawling with the gang of chickens*...
2006-11-29 [sara(:]: *Shakes fist*
2006-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *the Chicago Bulls burst in and drag Sara into the streets*
2006-11-30 [Pillowthief]: That sucks. Ever since the Kolby incident, no one trusts a chick with basket ball players.
2006-11-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: i see
2006-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2006-12-02 [sara(:]: *shakes fist again*
2006-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: what?
2006-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Do you have the correct operation code to shake that fist...? ...I'm sorry... but I'll have to confiscate that... *gets out chainsaw*...
2006-12-03 [sara(:]: o_o Uh...I have to go. *runs*
2006-12-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
2006-12-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: whats wrong [~Crimson Angel~]?
2006-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who's misty1?
2006-12-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Mortified Penguin] is annoying me,oh I got an e-mail from Dustin Goble,he told me to eat at bob's diner.
2006-12-09 [nokaredes]: I have a new stalker...
2006-12-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who?
2006-12-09 [nokaredes]: Some guy who stands outside my house at night...
2006-12-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: sure hes not just a scorned lover?  
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]:   WHAT?!
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: well you never know what hides in peoples closets these days
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: tell me some of yours...   
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: what??
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: pleeeeeeaaaase? *begs*
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: like what?
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oh i dont know... lesbian make outs, gang bangs, your first murder... that sorta thing
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmm...I've never made out with a girl,no gang bangs and I've never killed anyone.
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow... your boring...
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I stabed my brother with a fork in his leg,I threw a huge rock at his head when he was 10,and I hit him in the head with a high heel shoe.
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: are you only mean to your brother? no one else?
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmm...I did beat up a fifth grader,and I beat up the toughest boy in school and made him cry.
2006-12-10 [nokaredes]: ...*is reminded to bring her own utensils to B's D*...
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: sup?
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: so? hows the stalker going?
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah
2006-12-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: ello
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2006-12-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: ello
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: e'o
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-12-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: im bored
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: me too
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: who here seen beerfest?
2006-12-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: im sorry
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmm...what's that?
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: movie
2006-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: never heard of it.*eats ramen*I love ramen.
2006-12-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.-
2006-12-10 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2006-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Beerfest sucks, dude... *eats ramen*... *snipes out civilians*... ooo... children...
2006-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, all you weird@$$ freaks (especially misty), join gryffindorm!
2006-12-11 [Gregarious Turkey]: ...meh... gryffindorm sucks...
2006-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*drinks Granny's Hard Rubbing Alcohol*... owie... my internal cuts...
2006-12-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: should i join?
2006-12-13 [sunabozu]: yup
2006-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, what whoever that is said...
2006-12-14 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wow almost an entire week and this is all youv had to say? i thought you people were never at a loss for words
2006-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats*...*preferably ramen*...
2006-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: You know, I think it's time to purge B's D again! All who are Christians can stay... those who are not, I'm sorry to say you have to leave...*eats ramen*...
2006-12-15 [Fallen Child Athena]: i can stay
2006-12-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: iv seen the way you act and it certainly isnt christian so i guess you have to leave
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: 


Oh look I finnally got a picture of me up,the boy next to me is my friend Jaren Unfortanately,I'm wearing my ugly school Uniform.
2006-12-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: nice
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: thanks
2006-12-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: im lucky never had to wear uniforms to school though they thought about making it that way when all the preps started comming to school in see through stuff. you like the tan through bathingsuit clothes?
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ewwwwww,I'm gona ask kevin to take one of me on free dress day.
2006-12-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what kinda clothes you usually dress in?
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: not see through that's for sure.
2006-12-16 [sara(:]: Uhm. Yo.
2006-12-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol there were alot of sluts in my school...
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2006-12-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *wasnt one of them contrary to what everyone said*
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-12-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: http://files.kavefish.com/pictures/collections/bunny_suicide/
2006-12-16 [nokaredes]: Turkey (who I know is lurking somewhere) do you still live at the same address?
2006-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2006-12-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: i suck
2006-12-20 [sunabozu]: i make anything look good when i put it on
2006-12-21 [Pillowthief]: Me too. I make one sexy babe. Yum.
2006-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Dustin says not to send him a Christmas present... or he'll "release the hounds"...
2006-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF??    
2006-12-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: ummmmmmmmmm ok
2006-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: he told me to send him everything that has been going on.
2006-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dustin told me to tell you guys that Paul Doyle sucks.
2006-12-31 [Pillowthief]: Poor [Paul Doyle]...
2006-12-31 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *makes her blip on the page then disappears again*
2007-01-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2007-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... This place has seriously gone downhill these days...*eats chinese*...
2007-01-03 [Pillowthief]: *Eats Turkey, then thinks about some Penguin to go with it*
2007-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shoots you*... There can be no pillow thiefs if there are no pillows...*destroys pillows all around the world*...
2007-01-03 [Pillowthief]: Well... crap.
2007-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucker...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-03 [Pillowthief]: ! I forgot about the pillows I kept locked away in my secure Pillowkeeper. Im going to have to wait until Penguin forgets about them- then distribute them to random people. That way I will be able to steal them yet again! Hahaha!
2007-01-03 [Pillowthief]: *Pillowthief's thievy-ness is restored!*
2007-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh my gosh, those pillows will slowly reproduce and make even more pillows!..."ignorantly eats ramen*...
2007-01-03 [Pillowthief]: Clever, clever pillows.
2007-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*distributes poisoned pillow pellets throughout the diner*...
2007-01-03 [Pillowthief]: Ah, but I dont eat here! Haha!


...I do feel alittle sick from eating Turkey, though...
2007-01-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks,and puts my Edward Elric pillow in my steel safe under my bed where [The Bad Turkey] is staying until his ban from here is over*We made a deal,he keeps my safe safely garuded under my bed,or no Ramen for five months just vegetables.
2007-01-04 [Pillowthief]: Mmmm, Turkey and vegetables.....
2007-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmmm... I wonder where the fowl is... *eats ramen*...
2007-01-04 [Pillowthief]: *licks lips*
2007-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]:   NO EATING TURKEY OR I WILL HURT YOU!
2007-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Wow, if you love him so much why don't you ask him out?
2007-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: What I don't like him that way.*turns away*  
2007-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Sicko... just kidding! Don't get emotional!
2007-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2007-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Okey doke...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah
2007-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats your ramen*MUHAHAHAHAHA!*gives some ramen to Turkey.
2007-01-07 [nokaredes]: Pillowthief, you are too obsessed with the word "pillowkeeper." Also, [Paul Doyle] does not suck. You suck.
2007-01-07 [nokaredes]: And I have the videotape to prove it ^_^
2007-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'll pass it on to Dustin Goble.
2007-01-07 [nokaredes]: ...you don't need to.
2007-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,can I have that tape?
2007-01-07 [nokaredes]: ...ask Dustin.
2007-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: k
2007-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats fermented ramen from two days ago*...
2007-01-07 [Pillowthief]: What would you name a safe that you keep stolen pillows in, Allie? That's right...


Also, I said "poor [Paul Doyle]"... I never said he sucked :(
2007-01-07 [nokaredes]: ...I would name such a safe Ricardo. And I was referring to whoever said that he sucked, not you. Not everything is about you, you know...
2007-01-07 [Pillowthief]: Why not?
2007-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, why not? Hah, just kidding! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-09 [Pillowthief]: (Hmmm.... they could be the same person... *shifty eyes*)


Guess its time to research. I'll be back with results.
2007-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh? Wh-what?! You think I'm Allie?! I'm a guy! She's a... girl! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-10 [Pillowthief]: Not Allie. Crap, forgot to look into that. There's another person that's using the whole "*eats ramen*" thing. He's creeping me out and I think its you.
2007-01-10 [c101.]: what is all of this about?
2007-01-10 [Pillowthief]: Stalkers.
2007-01-10 [nokaredes]: Mortimer =/= The Bad Turkey.
2007-01-10 [Pillowthief]: Nope, different name. Its the guy on SHU current stalker. He's been messaging me. Probably watching from the shadows right now. Creepy.
2007-01-10 [nokaredes]: *can't click on that* *is annoyed* And no, Mortimer is not that person either...
2007-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... that person's a fake...
2007-01-11 [Pillowthief]: Bah. Fixed it you brat. You know the wiki...
2007-01-11 [nokaredes]: ...you fixed the link, I see...
2007-01-11 [Pillowthief]: What's the difference on the "Cooked Sushi"? One's at $4.50 and the other's at $2...
2007-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... the expensive one was made by me!
2007-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... The stock market has risen. Due to the enlightened state of the nation, prices might go down! Bob's Diner, though, will keep its sacred tradition of highly elevated prices! Who knows, even those cheap prices might go up, too. ...*eats Chinese food*...
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: B's D stocks will remain at $6,050 a share...
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: As current CEO of the Bob's Diner cooperation, you own about $363,000 in shares, correct Mr. Penguin?
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: *purchases 30 shares*
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: *takes over as vice chairman*
2007-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Now, those are quality stocks, folks! C'mon, go buy a share!
2007-01-11 [Pillowthief]: *PT buys 1 (count it! One!) share*
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: We're goin' up by the second! Why, in just a mere eight years, Bob's Diner has become a cooporate juggernaut!
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: Come now, good sir... you can't expect to ever get anywhere with a mere one share... how about another fourty?
2007-01-11 [Pillowthief]: Nope, this lets me vote in shareholder meetings, but doesnt give me as much responcibility or grief when Bob's stock plummets. :)
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: Curse you, smart shopper... Mort! Get the emergency gun! ...it's in tha' fridge!
2007-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: We're both co-managers, Mr. Secret. There's no point in being racist. Speaking of racist, there was a KKK meeting in Birmingham today! They have a right to assemble, you know! The first ammendment rules, man!
2007-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Birmingham happens to be in the former Confederate state, Alabama!
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: Yes... call me racist and then defend the KKK...
2007-01-11 [Secret Corner Secrecy]: Where's the logic, man?! ...WHERE?!! *chokes and dies*
2007-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I wasn't defending the KKK! I was merely pointing out their flamboyant use of the first ammendment! Now, back to the co-management of the Bob's Diner Corporation!
2007-01-12 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...only at this dinner would i see a converstaion like this going on, happy b-day penguin also...
2007-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, buy B's D stocks... and thanks.
2007-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid, stupid love-smitten girls...(not you, wolf)...*eats ramen*... They never understand. Dustin, if you're reading this, Allie didn't take it too well...
2007-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Racists!
2007-01-14 [sara(:]: I`m on. Idiots.
2007-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in singing I'm walking on sunshine,and is smiling*
2007-01-14 [weasel2]: pluged ears  
2007-01-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh sorry you don't like that song?
2007-01-15 [weasel2]:       
2007-01-17 [~Crimson Angel~]:     
2007-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-18 [nokaredes]: ...stupid picture-icons... >_<
2007-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Which I do believe have already been banned from this wiki... *eats boiling hot ramen*... my tongue! She burns!
2007-01-18 [nokaredes]: 
2007-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Tough choice...
2007-01-18 [Pillowthief]: Very... Door number one, or.... Door number one.
2007-01-19 [nokaredes]: ...I like how only 77% of the voters voted for a...
2007-01-19 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, odd that.
2007-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*... this seems a little crunchier than usual... perhaps I should boil it longer...
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *throws viagra in the air*... wheeeeee!
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -tackles penguin- Happy now?
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sure... but this broken leg sure hurts...
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: When did you break you leg? -tilts head-
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...when some crazy lady tackled me...
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs and sits down at the bar- Sorry bout that, but you did kinda ask me to come 'round more offten ^__^
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes I did. *the termites eat the bar*
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -takes out bug spray and kills termites-
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: How would you like to become a Bob's Diner shareholder? Just buy some B's D stocks now at the low low price of... $3,087?!! What a freakin' ripoff- er I mean, great deal!
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOO!! JIMMY!!
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- No thanks, I'm only in this for the food...wait is that my line
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks script*... no, no... first you have to say "I'm going to maze of guile right now!" and then wait for your cue.
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: right, -coughs- "i'm going to maze of the guild right now!" -waits for cue-
2007-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen* ...that's your cue!!
2007-01-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -goes to the guild-
2007-01-24 [Pillowthief]: Where'd Wolf go? I thought it was the Maze of guile, not maze of the guild... Mort! You gave the wrong que!!  *Goes looking for Wolf*
2007-01-24 [weasel2]: you ask for it mommy fills room with snow
2007-01-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -giggles;- YAA!!!
2007-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: "maze of the guild"?! ...*twitch spasm eats ramen*...
2007-01-26 [sara(:]: *shakes head*
2007-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey baby... better watch out... you might get... shaken baby sydrome. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-26 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: guess what!?!?!?! i got accepted to Samford!!!!!!!
*jumps up and does the 'I got into college' dance*
2007-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: That's very similar to the Macarena... copyright infringement perhaps? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-26 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: no its more like jumping around and screaming!!!!
2007-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...so... it's like The Mentally Impaired dance? ...which was made popular by Clem Johnson in 1989...
2007-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-01-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: An extremely modest man was in the hospital for a series of tests, the last of which had left his bodily systems extremely upset.


Upon making several false alarm trips to the bathroom, he decided the
latest episode was another and stayed put. He suddenly filled his bed with diarrhea and was embarrassed beyond his ability to remain rational.


In a complete loss of composure he jumped out of bed, gathered up the bed sheets, and threw them out the hospital window.


A drunk was walking by the hospital when the sheets landed on him.


He started yelling, cursing, and swinging his arms violently trying to get the unknown things off, and ended up with the soiled sheets in a tangled pile at his feet.


As the drunk stood there, unsteady on his feet, staring down at the sheets, a hospital security guard (barely containing his laughter) who had watched the whole incident walked up and asked, "What the heck is going on here?"


The drunk, still staring down replied: "I think I just beat the shit out of a ghost"
2007-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Then the cops arrested the poor short Guatamalan man for public drunkeness.
2007-01-28 [Pillowthief]: Poor guy. Wonder what he was doing drunk walking by a hospital?
2007-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: He was after the godfather again... they really should tighten security around there...
2007-01-28 [Pillowthief]: Conspiracies around every corner. Im hungry.
2007-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hungry?! ...eat at Bob's Di- wait... that place sucks... get some chinese food or something... *eats ramen*...
2007-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]:
Interesting... *eats ramen*...
2007-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]:
...
2007-01-29 [Pillowthief]: Sorry fell asleep. Were you talking? *Yawn*
2007-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes! I was telling you that your toupee was on fire!
2007-01-29 [Pillowthief]: Noooooo! Wait, its snowing outside. Where will we go?
2007-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: It's snowing in here as well... seeing as how the roof is gone... *eats frozen ramen*...
2007-01-29 [Pillowthief]: Damn you Wolf...
2007-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Wolf? WOLF?! ...not again! ...*screams and eats ramen*...
2007-02-02 [Insaniac Yoshie]: End this pathetic deception! I know your hidind martians in your head!! gimme them nmartians! I'm going to put butter on them!! Martians!! Grr!!
2007-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: They were living in [Pillowthief]'s head... but they starved to death...
2007-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello
2007-02-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *runs aroudn throwing ramen* RAMEN!!!
2007-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: YUM!*eats ramen*
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: LIES! i know it was you! you who ate my cornflakes! jellyfish do not go with peanutbutter! i need cheese!!! pedestrian cow fucker!
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! *takes Rio's ramen*... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and take Yoshie to a psychiatrist *
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: And how does that make you feel? *eats ramen*
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what were you thinking that lipstick with those heels!!? beware the mad kittens! price check on aile 246245!!! i like your t-shirt!
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Um... we don't have an aile 246245... perhaps you were thinking of bathroom #246245? It's right down the hall... in that room we never use... what was it... oh yeah! "Kitchen"... *drinks kitten juice*... ah... can't beat fresh squeezed.
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: how do i feel? banana doors monkey anal! WHATS THE PASSWORD!?
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: The password is burrito! How many times must I tell you?! ...*eats... RAMEN, darn you!*...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *takes raman and places it upturned on her head, then begings eating grass*
2007-02-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *takes the ramen from penguin and hands him a stuffed penguin,and runs*Bye bye penguin man!
stuffed penguin:*is really a bomb and explodes in [Mortified Penguin]'s hands*
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions chase Rio* ...*eats ramen off Yoshie's head*...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: penis! penis! penis! who has stolen your vagina?
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Dwarves, I believe... *slips some drugs into your tea*...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i have tea?! no!!! *sputters like a stuck chahuahua*
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *injects the tea into your blood stream*
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *spontaniously combusts* ...AAAAH!!! NOOOO!!! ...the fire totally overcooked my egg!!!
2007-02-04 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *just stares*
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh no! He's hidden! ...*hires some clowns to find you*...
2007-02-04 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Gahhh!! CLOWNS!! *runs*
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Sic 'im, boys!
2007-02-04 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *turns and pulls out a sword* HAHAHAHAHA!!! *startes slashing the clowns but misses and cuts off own foot.* DAMN IT!!
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *puts LSD in MP's ramen*
2007-02-04 [Pillowthief]: ... Wow. I leave you guys alone for 2 minutes... I dont even know why I watch this wiki.
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Because you have a crush on me?! ...sicko... *eats LSD flavored ramen*... hmm... this has a kick to it...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *poops on pillows head*
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Disgusting! I won't be able to eat for a week! ......*eats ramen*...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i only thought it looked to sanitary in here just trying to help
2007-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I have a guy for that... *points at Turkey*... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: havent seen turkey in a long time though...
2007-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I haven't really... on here, anyway... I live within stalking distance of him... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...he says he's "looking for a new name to steal"...
2007-02-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hm... ok i guess
2007-02-05 [Pillowthief]: *washes hair, then forces Yoshie to take a toliet bath. With her face*
2007-02-06 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *grabs her bubble bath on the way
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *videotapes for future blackmailing*
2007-02-06 [Pillowthief]: *Copyrights videotape for royalty purposes*
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *makes a videotape almost exactly the same and sells it at half price at the local flea market*
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Copyrighting issues always remind me of the Beatles...
2007-02-06 [Pillowthief]: *Infests local flea market with actual fleas, shutting it down temporarly for de-fleasing*
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *uses recently acquired skills as an exterminator/computer debugger (it was a "buy one class, get another free" deal) to make thousands of dollars ridding the flea market of fleas... and also pesky computer viruses*
2007-02-06 [Pillowthief]: *[Pillowthief] makes millions sitting on his couch as he had already predetermined the newspaper-colored-un-flying-sandwich would try something to that extent and had bought thousands of stock in both exterminators and computer debuggers! [Pillowthief] then waited until it hit its peak then smartly sold all the stock for nothing but pure profit!*
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the stocks continue going up, making the new Exterminator/Computer Debugger company a multi billion dollar cooperation, inadvertantly making it's CEO (yours truly, me) one of the richest and most powerful men in the world*... *uses that money to start a major campaign for my third party (The Ramen Party) for the 2008 elections*... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-06 [Pillowthief]: *[Pillowthief] is content with the little money he has as he realizes greedy people are evil. Especially pinstriped-lunchmeat.
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats expensive ramen*... greedy? Yes. Evil? Also yes. Content? You better believe it!
2007-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: New Freakin' Badge!


http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/photo/92105_1170809537.jpg
2007-02-07 [nokaredes]: www.lost.eu/1a9f2
2007-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! I'll lose if I'm too lazy to get someone to join?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Couldn't you just use a proxy to make a new profile?
2007-02-07 [nokaredes]: Yes, but some people don't like to cheat.
2007-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll never make it in life with that kind of attitude...
2007-02-07 [Insaniac Yoshie]: sadly.... with the way the world is today, hes right
2007-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Sadly?! ...Cheating's fun! ...and stealing, and murder... and adultery... and narcissism...
2007-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats his dayly bowl of ramen*
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in after blowing up all of the lions*Sup?
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: They're not balloons, you know... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pelts [Mortified Penguin] with cherry bombs*
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats them*... these cherries are terrible!
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*you aren't supossed to eat them.
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not supposed to eat puppies either, but that doesn't stop me... *eats puppy ramen*...
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: POOR PUPPIES!*steals your puppy ramen*
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you like puppy ramen too? ...*eats puppy drumstick*...
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: STOP EATING PUPPIES!*steals everyfood in the world made of puppies and burns it then takes all the puppies that haven't been made into food and hides them in a different demention*
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: So... you wasted all that food that could have been used in a third world country...? And also stole so many little childrens new puppies, crushing their poor little feelings...? ...that's mean, man... *eats kitten ramen*...
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO NOT THE KITTENS!*steals all of the kittens too and puts their owners in another demention as well*
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...now you're taking children from their families? ...*eats albanian poisen mongrel flavored ramen*...
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: FINE!*sends the familes there too except you*
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and now everyone is all alone in some strange new place... without the comfort and protection of their own homes... how cruel... *eats human ramen*...
2007-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *builds replicas of there houses and puts all of their belongs in them*
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Wouldn't have just been easier to put me there and leave them all here...?
2007-02-09 [nokaredes]: You could save all that trouble and just put Mortimer in a dimension without puppies and kittens... or ramen...
2007-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles evily then puts all the puppies,kittens,and people back in their houses and puts [Mortified Penguin] in a dimension without puppies,kittens,and ramen*
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats a chunk of rock*...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws rock at misty's face*
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: MY NAME IS RIO NOW!
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...okie doke. Sorry about that, misty. *sticks thumb up*... *eats ramen substitute*...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles evily*
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeech... get some braces, lady...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]:   I'M IN A BAD MOOD SO DON'T GET ME ANGRYER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... you're always in a bad mood... *gives your eye a severe poking with a pointy stick*...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]:                       
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: You know you get fined for every one of those you put on this wiki... *points at giant "anti-emoticon" poster on wall*... $5,000 an emoticon...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you the money*
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...$70,000!!
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I handed you the money,now if you don't stop being rude,I'll leave bob's diner and will never come back.
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...me? Rude?! ...how dare you speak such lies! ...I'm a gentleman! ...*shoots orphan*...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: if you are a gentleman why did you just shoot that orphan?
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...why, so I could save the lives of two other orphans, of course.
2007-02-10 [nokaredes]: Voldemort is an orphan...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: REALLY?!*shoots Voldemort 25 times,stabs him 35 times,point my wand at him and yells avada kerdava,throws him off of a three story building,throws him out of an airplane,blows him up,then burns him in a fire*
2007-02-10 [nokaredes]: ..."avada kerdava" won't kill him, you know...
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: SHUT IT,He is now dead,I destroyed his what was it hexocruse or whatever they are called.
2007-02-10 [nokaredes]: ..."hexocruse"?!
2007-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah,or whatever.
2007-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I need to take a relaxing hexo-cruse to the Bahamas...
2007-02-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
2007-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Hinata?! ...she sucks...
2007-02-11 [nokaredes]: ...isn't "cruise" the word you're looking for...?
2007-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nah... cruises are overrated... but cruses, on the other hand... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *punches [Mortified Penguin]*
2007-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *was using a replacement jutsu*... you actually punched broken glass! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-12 [Playground love.♥]: =]]]]]]
2007-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Wh-what?! Where'd you come from?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-14 [Pillowthief]: Ah, not so much of a ninja now, my pinstriped-breakfast-sandwich. I would bet Hinata knew he was there all along. *Poisons ramen*
2007-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*... *is Rasputin*... *doesn't die*...
2007-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Preeeetty sneaky, sis'...
2007-02-14 [Pillowthief]: (Rasputin did die, you know. Who knows if it was by poison?)
*is Wesley off of the Princess Bride and laughs wittily, as I poisoned both ramens, just is case you switched them*
2007-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... both ramens, you say? ...I knew I shouldn't have had seconds... *keels over dead*...
2007-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*is a zombie*... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-16 [sara(:]: Ramen sucks! *shakes fist*
2007-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!?!! ...*kidnaps Sara*... *knocks her unconscious, poisons her, and puts her in a big empty room with nothing but a small TV and 100 bowls of ramen*...
2007-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *TV comes on*... "Sara. I want to play a game. For years, you have been rejecting the deliciousness of ramen. I have given you a deadly poison that will completely destroy your heart, unless you can find the antidote within the next thirty minutes. To your left is 100 bowls of ramen. In one of the bowls is the antidote. You must eat until you find the correct bowl and devour it, before your time is up. Bon Appétit and let the games begin." ...*TV goes off*... *clock begins counting down*...
2007-02-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah blah
2007-02-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hey look it looks exactly like everyother wind blown comment in here
2007-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: 'cept slightly more comprehensible... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-16 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shuts down all the ramen factories in the world and burns the last of what is already made* hmpf well... that was fun while it lasted... *shrugs and walks away*
2007-02-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *makes more and eats the ramen*YUM!
2007-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats wrahmen*... offbrands!
2007-02-17 [sara(:]: Riiight...
2007-02-20 [Pillowthief]: *eats sushi and wonders if penquin tastes anything like chicken* Where's Turkey? I havent made fun of him in a while.
2007-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Turkey? ...*points at sandwich on table*...
2007-02-20 [Pillowthief]: *looks suspiciously at the pinstriped-breakfast-sandwich* Why is Turkey on the table?
2007-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...table fetish?
2007-02-20 [Pillowthief]: *Looks suspiciously at Turkey, then back to the flavored-newspaper-colored-package-of-lunchmeat*
2007-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Did I say you could look at me?! Huh, mutha' F******?!! *shoots you*
2007-02-21 [Pillowthief]: But I didnt say, "What?"...
2007-02-21 [nokaredes]: I'll say it then: "What?"
2007-02-21 [Pillowthief]: "Say What again! Say WHAT AGAIN!" - Jules, Pulp Fiction.
2007-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*beats up a pimp with his gang of cops*... Man... GTA: San Andreas is one weird game...
2007-02-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: gang of cops? what happened to the chickens? go on strike again?
2007-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: They were eaten... by the pride of lions...
2007-02-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: and why didnt you hire the lions? o cliche?
2007-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: The lions have worked here for years... *points at them in the corner eating Bob*... *they wave*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*Y'all are crazy Mother F****S!
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *huggles*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kisses*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*was using that there replacement jutsu again*... *watches you kiss dog scrotum*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kisses pic of Daniel Radcliffe*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...he's an emo now, you know...
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...~gryffindorm10!
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kisses Turkey*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...eewww... you're gay, man... turkey's a chick! ...get it? ...chick...? ...turkey...? ...*eats chicken ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...B! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is drunk*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...What's this? ...someone's drinking you?
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I've had to much to drink.
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I assume you're well hydrated then?
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep I drank water too.
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Water lacking of sodium, eh?
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you think about that! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok*eats your ramen*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Misty, Misty, Misty... Is someone getting the best the best the best the best of you...?
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh?
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...exactly. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *licks your face*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'll have you know I haven't washed this face in years... not even after I rolled in that poo that time...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *takes off your clothes and gives you a bath with axe shower gel*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ..."You" better be the name of a little Chinese kid...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *appears suddenly*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *drowns puppies for no apparent reason*
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *stares at menu and prices*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *looks at Mortified Penguin*Ok you are clean.*dress him in clean clothes,but not before rubbing his crotch area,reaapears from the back*Oh hi Eloura.
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: Ummmm yea hi.
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't be lookin' at me... you should be attending to Him... that other little Chinese boy... you sick pedophile... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: How are you?*is blushing slightly*
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: Me? I am ok.
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: What about you.
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm good.
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: That's good.
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that's a matter of opinion... *eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *raises eyebrow and steals ramen* Ramen=Good!
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Knife=painful! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yep
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: Pain=fun and interesting O.o *wants ramen badly now*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you=sadist?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smirks evily*
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: Me=sadist? *twitches nose wishing her brain was now awake*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ramen=yo mama! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *looks at penguin and say's* Ramen=mrrrrrow
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ramen=Sex
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ramen=massacre... *enjoys a nice ramen*...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: Ramen=Vampiric *starts to really wish she had ramen*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmm...*kisses [Mortified Penguin]*
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *runs from emotion*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *stops and comes back and says* Is it to late to order/
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: ,,,, Never min.
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: k
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: Yea. *pokes penguin* Evil person isn't speacking O.o
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... uh huh... *knocks misty out*... *puts her in a room with nothing but a small TV, hundreds of empty ramen cups, and a dead body*... *TV comes on*... "I want to play a game. Misty1. Your whole life, you've never really had to use your brain. You've drank and wasted it away. You've taken it for granted. I have slipped you a rare drug that will disolve your brain until it is nothing more than a small puddle of grey goo in a mere hour. In front of you are ten pills. If you take too few, the virus will continue eating your brain. If you take too many, you will die of an overdose. You have to use your brain and decide how many pills to take to stop the virus. So, as the old phrase goes; use it... or lose it. Let the games begin."... *TV goes off*... *timer starts going down*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmm...Oh who cares!*shoots self in the head*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What?!! ...where'd you get that gun?!! ...do you know how much money it costs to set these things up?!! ...At least struggle for a while!! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is dead*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks you*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *comes back from the dead and is 20 miles away*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Su-weet. Not only is my kick really strong, but I can bring people back to life! ...*sets up a "clinic"*... "Dearly departed loved ones? Old guy not finish signing that will in time? Let me just kick them back to life! Half price off with coupon"...


*clinic goes bankrupt*


...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *sues you for copyright infringement*
2007-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen covered chocolate*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...well... you disgust me... I'm going to go eat some ramen now... peace out, ho.
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *stares at them all* Wow
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *takes ramen a grins* I HAVE THE RAMEN!
2007-02-24 [nokaredes]: Since when is sex and other weird naked touching allowed at B's D? Isn't that what the makeout shack is for?!
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: The makeout shack is for willing participants... *eats wramen*...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: *wonders what wramen is*
2007-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...offbrand ramen...
2007-02-24 [Eloura]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH ok, makes more sense now, I FOUND RAmEN!!! There was none in the house O.o and i found some!!!
2007-02-25 [nokaredes]:  I don't know if you can see it (note to self: don't take pictures at midnight) but this place near my house is called Bob's 88...
2007-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *torches it*
2007-02-25 [Pillowthief]: *Raises a mob with pitchforks to tear the place down, yell alot, and to overall look 'chaos-y' while we're doing it*
2007-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you and your unruly mobs... *has a mob of butlers wearing tuxedos and carrying sniper rifles*...
2007-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner is about to be bought out by the Ramen Shack Enterprise Corporation Oragnization Company Inc. Would all shareholders cast their votes either in favor or against the takeover.
2007-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *votes his 40,000 shares in favor of the takeover by RSECOCI*
2007-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: They're business associates with the center for A Build Up of Self Esteem... you know... ABUSE...
2007-02-26 [Eloura]: *watches*
2007-02-28 [Insaniac Yoshie]: we own shares? how come i was never told this?
2007-02-28 [nokaredes]: Do we own shares if we put something on the menu...?
2007-02-28 [Eloura]: Shares?
2007-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Ten shares per item! ...and 100 shares for each worker...
2007-02-28 [nokaredes]: I think I have only one item on right now... 'cause I moved the rest to the other diner... how many shares do former employees get?
2007-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...negative ten for leaving in the first place! ...but CEOs and Vice Presidents get 30,000 each... you could always buy some... they're only $3,000 dollars a share now...
2007-02-28 [Pillowthief]: *Starts selling shares he didnt even know he had*
2007-02-28 [nokaredes]: So I have zero. That works for me (especially 'cause the Dow went down so much yesterday).
2007-03-01 [Eloura]: *blinks*
2007-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-01 [Eloura]: *wants ramen*
2007-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats all the ramen greedily*...
2007-03-01 [Eloura]: *cries*
2007-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... cry me a river! ...so I can sail on it down to the store to buy myself some more ramen! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-01 [Eloura]: *quits crying and steals, and eats your ramen*
2007-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that ramen was infected with ebola... *eats the uninfected bowl*...
2007-03-01 [Pillowthief]: *Is Wesley from the Princess Bride- Laughs wittily*
2007-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws an ebola infected monkey at you*
2007-03-01 [Eloura]: *dies*
2007-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *sweeps you into the pile of dead bodies out back*
2007-03-01 [Eloura]: *awakes and walks back in and say's* Glad i'm vampiric.
2007-03-01 [nokaredes]: *anime fall*
2007-03-02 [Eloura]: O.o
2007-03-02 [Pillowthief]: Misses The Lemon.
2007-03-02 [Eloura]: What lemon? O/o
2007-03-02 [nokaredes]: [la vie lemon].
2007-03-02 [Pillowthief]: No Life about her, I already explained this... She is now just The Lemon.
2007-03-02 [Eloura]: ohhh ok.
2007-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-02 [nokaredes]: But it's her username! I can't say her username without saying the life part, or the link won't work.
2007-03-03 [Eloura]: *nibbles on her own ramen feeling that ramen isn't even helping*
2007-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...ramen isn't helping?!! ...lies! Ramen cures cancer! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-04 [nokaredes]: Ramen causes cancer.
2007-03-04 [Eloura]: No ramen isn't helping it not making me feel better. *cries and defenceivly say's* No it doesn't
2007-03-04 [Pillowthief]: *Again, laughs wittily as Wesley*
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...dude... don't be so repetitive... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-04 [nokaredes]: ...I like how the last two times I said something here, I was ignored...
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You're welcome!
2007-03-04 [Pillowthief]: Who are you saying welcome to? :P
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Some homless guy... he thanked me for giving him some food... little does he know, I put rat poison in it...
2007-03-04 [Pillowthief]: *laughs wittily as... Ok, it is getting alittle old...
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*... yeah... *eats ramen*... it gets really annoying when someone keeps saying the same thing over and over... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-04 [nokaredes]: ...I don't need to comment here anymore, I guess...
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: No one ever really "needs" to... 'cept that guy... with the disease...
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Reaper Joe says: See you next summer!
2007-03-04 [nokaredes]: Sometimes, when I stop, someone begs me to come back and comment some more...
2007-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Really... do go on... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello
2007-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Heh... one less watcher... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-05 [Pillowthief]: Poor Nok...
2007-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: She's not poor! ...she's lower middle class... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-06 [jumpy little pixie]: blink blink
2007-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Have a seat! ...*eats ramen*... no, seriously... we're giving away seats...
2007-03-08 [nokaredes]: ...nokaredes...
2007-03-08 [nokaredes]: 
Daylight pictures pwn nighttime ones...
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...how do pronounce "nokaredes"?!
2007-03-08 [Paul Doyle]: Show your hatred. Bring your ramen. All of it o__O
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that's... a lot of ramen...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: MY RAMEN!!!! *steals all the ramen in the world*
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yet again, I will eat some wramen... *eats wramen*...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *twitches nose and sighs* Evil..
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a chainsaw to your nose*
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *doesn't move, and seems not to even notice it there*
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes after your neck*
2007-03-08 [nokaredes]: You pronounce nokaredes "nokaredes." How else?
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...of course... how silly of me...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *still doesn't notice*
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *listens to Jo Dee Messina*... uh... I mean... some manly hard core rock rap stuff... 50 cent! Rest in peace, TuPac!
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *grins*
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Santa has some dark secrets, man... spreading commercialism and sin throughout the world under the clever disguise of "christmas"... pretending to be a happy christian holiday... but nooo... christmas derived from an ancient greek festival of homosexuality and continued being passed down through the generations, as the original meaning of the holiday was slowly forgotten... Jesus wasn't even born in the winter, you know... the bible mentions that the shepards were in the fields at the time... but if they were in the fields, it wouldn't have been winter! Sometime later in the year, maybe, but not winter! ...and is it just me, or is "santa" just and anagram for "satan"?!! ...*goes on rambling insane theories*... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *giggles* Lol
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *eats shrimp ramen*
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?!!
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: Shrimp flavored ramen. !!!!!!!!!!
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sucks!
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: How do i suck?
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Your... interior is under negative air pressure...? Meaning that when any random hole on you opens, air rushes in and creates a vacuum-like motion. Hence, you suck.
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *twitches* Not what i ment, why did you say i suck??????
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I never said that you suck... I said that shrimp ramen sucks... though you do suck... I just never said that...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: .......... Shrimp ramen doesn't suck, and i hate to say it but you suck to, everyone does if you think about it.
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nope... my innerds are all under positive air pressure... I blow, If you must.
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: Ummmmmmmmmmm okkkkk... *eats more ramen*
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*!
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... if you only attached that L and O... and closed in that U... and straightened out that R... hmm... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *doesn't even want to figure it out* *hands out free ramen to everyone*
2007-03-08 [weasel2]: i have paws
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: Awwwwwwwww I sorry Weasel *puts in a dish for you to try to help*
2007-03-08 [weasel2]: thank you but raw chicken better
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *looks around and finds fresh raw chicken* Found some!
2007-03-08 [weasel2]: give me give me
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: *gives you raw chicken and grins*
2007-03-08 [weasel2]: eats raw chicken blood goes every where
2007-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... yeah... "fresh" raw chicken...
2007-03-08 [Eloura]: Yes fresh raw chicken * smiles sorta*
2007-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... I was bored... Now Bob's Diner is bigger... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: WOW! *blinks*
2007-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...quiet, you! ...*throws flaming chair at you*... why that chair is flaming, I don't know... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: *ducks holding torches behind herback* Never!
2007-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons you*... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I put the "piness" in hapiness.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: *is dead again sits up and eats her own ramen*
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: AH! ZOMBIE! *shoots the zombie*
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Ummmm More like vampire, not zombie o.O
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Okay. Sorry bout that.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: This ok, many people make that same mistake about me!
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I perfer lycans but vampires are cool to
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: *twitches nose* I like both, my vampiricness is a long story, but the sad thing is i am regular wolf, and cat. on top of it.
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Sounds like an interesting life.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Believe me, it gets complecating, especialy with possibilty's of a mix again..
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I'm just a simple guardian user.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Ok. *blinks* Wait huh? *is ut of it8
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Its a division of alchemy, hence the name.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Ahhhhhhh ok, sorry mind is temparaily shutting down will be awake again in few minutes
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Its okay, its not a well known skill.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: It sound familur but faintly
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Do you have a game cube?
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: No...
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Never mind then.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Why?
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: They used the name guardian user in the game Tales of Phantasia. Awsome game, only for gamecube.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Ahhhhhhhhhh ok.
2007-03-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: But it had nothing to do with my abilitys.
2007-03-10 [Eloura]: Ok.
2007-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: And I'm a penguin... that is often times mortified... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: If you want to know why I haven't been on,My dad told me to turn off the water there was a t.v. antenna(sp?) in the grass and I didn't see it,and I tripped and my hand went through the window,I had to go to the hospital in Gainesville by helicopter there was blood everywhere and I had to get six stiches,oh and my bro was hogging the computer.


P.s.I'm fine so please don't cry or worry,I have to go back wensday cause the doc was worried about nerve damage.
2007-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: You flew on a helicopter to get only six stitches for your hand...? ...I find that hard to believe...
2007-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: I nicked an artery or something like that
2007-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...suuuuure...
2007-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'll send you a pic
2007-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: You'd better.
2007-03-11 [Eloura]: I can believe it, because with so much blood loss the might have been worried about those kinda porblems, plus the fact there could have been more damage, they probaly did alot of tests right?
2007-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah
2007-03-11 [Eloura]: I thought so.
2007-03-11 [Pillowthief]: Huhuhuhuh. Cha'.
2007-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-12 [Eloura]: *sleeps*
2007-03-12 [jumpy little pixie]: im sleepy
2007-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Nooo... you're jumpy...
2007-03-13 [Eloura]: mrrrrrrrrrow
2007-03-13 [nokaredes]: Send me pictures of your medical emergency too! :O
2007-03-14 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Gruesome injuries? Have some of Granny's Hard Rubbing Alcohol...
2007-03-14 [Pillowthief]: Is that on the menu?
2007-03-14 [Narcissistic Turkey]: But, of course... in the drinks...
2007-03-14 [Pillowthief]: Antiseptic? Was wondering about that. You should think about apple flavored.
2007-03-15 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...never! Peach flavored! Viva la peaches!
2007-03-15 [Pillowthief]: :(
2007-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I dislike hairy fruits... they're just so... unnatural... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-15 [Acidic Khemica]: Okay okay...I'm back
2007-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... now... where's wolfy and pixie...?
2007-03-15 [Acidic Khemica]: Hell if I know
2007-03-15 [Pillowthief]: Hmm. You should know. *Eats a peach*
2007-03-15 [Acidic Khemica]: Well...I don't.....*shrugs*
2007-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats... some kind of noodles... uh... what're they called...? Ah... yes... RAMEN!*
2007-03-15 [Acidic Khemica]: *playing with the gloves on her hands*
2007-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Gloves?! You saying this place is dirty?!
2007-03-15 [Acidic Khemica]: No I have gloves on my hands because I'm cold!
2007-03-15 [Eloura]: *blinks*
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: You saying we can't maintain a decent temperature?!
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: It's kind of hard when the roof's missing...
2007-03-16 [Pillowthief]: Is wolf around? I want to complain...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *watches the "adults" Talk
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Yeah... "adults"... of course... *hides stack of porn, alcohol, and cigars behind the counter*...
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: What's this?! Two more watchers?! ...sweet... *eats mort's ramen*...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *raises hand and say's* i'm one of them. *steals the alcohol* Theheh
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Quiet, you! I updated the news!
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *raises hand and say's* i know where i came from! *drinks the alcohol and looks innocent of eating ramen*
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Darn those storks...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *blinks and eats wholeheartedly at ramen acting like she wasn't listening*
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: *harpoons you*... *steals yo' ramen*...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *is living dead so steals ramen back and goes back to eating it after pulling harpoon out and hitting you with it*
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Why would the living dead eat ramen...?
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Everybody eats ramen! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: Because ramen rcks all life forms!!!! *points to ramen and say's* They make blood flavored
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...do you know how many noodles gave their lives to make this ramen?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: Not enough! *twitches nose digging into the undead's ramen*
2007-03-16 [Pillowthief]: ... I hate ramen.
2007-03-16 [Acidic Khemica]: *yawns*
2007-03-16 [nokaredes]: You would.
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: I disagree with you pillow.
2007-03-16 [nokaredes]: I'm not sure that you can disagree with whether or not Iszy likes ramen...
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...WHAT?!?!!?!?!?!! *lights pillowthief on fire*
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: That's an insult to my religion!
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *blinks confusingly*
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not a word! *lights you on fire*
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *glares and is covered in a giant earthen wall and the fire hits him, she eats ramen watching through a slit hole*
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: It seems that it would get really hot inside an enclosed structure and surrounded by fire... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *yawns as the fire licks the outside but it is Ac inside *eats more ramen*
2007-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...In an earthen structure?!
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *yells out* Duh, it's me!
2007-03-16 [nokaredes]: Someone is God-moding...
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Who? Is it me? You'll tell me if it's me, right?! RIGHT?!!
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: *explodes*
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: am not. Just very good at shaping the earth to bring air through vents in there.
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Then... couldn't you have simply controlled the earth and air and put the fire out in the first place...? ...now the diner's on fire... again...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *shakes head no* I am still not good with wind.
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Riiiiiiight...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: Seriously, i am mostly earth like no air for me.
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Well... uh... I'm water! ...*boils some water*... *cooks ramen in that water*... *eats the ramen*...
2007-03-16 [Eloura]: *steals more ramen and eat's it* HA!
2007-03-16 [Narcissistic Turkey]: How dare you?! That against Mort's religion! ...*burns you*... witch! *points accusingly*
2007-03-17 [Eloura]: Ummmm ummmm *twitches and say's* Evil *turns to ash and gone so say's from beyond the grave* How dare i what?
2007-03-17 [nokaredes]: *steps around pieces of [Narcissistic Turkey]* *eats pizza*
2007-03-17 [Eloura]: *wonders what happened to turkey*
2007-03-17 [nokaredes]: He exploded, remember? It's only a few comments up...
2007-03-17 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Yeah... *is in pieces*...
2007-03-17 [Eloura]: I thought he burneded me........ Henceforth this post.


2007-03-16 Sаgасious Turkеу: How dare you?! That against Mort's religion! ...*burns you*... witch! *points accusingly*
2007-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-17 [nokaredes]: ..."burneded"?
2007-03-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: okay i'm here penguin..
2007-03-17 [Eloura]: Yes burneded




Hiya White!
2007-03-18 [nokaredes]: I don't know that word.
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: It means burned......
2007-03-18 [nokaredes]: ......
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: Never mind.
2007-03-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: heya eloura
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: heya white glad to see you here.
2007-03-18 [nokaredes]: *gets out noisemakers*
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: *watches*
2007-03-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: brb
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: ok.
2007-03-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: what's been going on while i've been away?
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: *shrugs* No clue!
2007-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Lots of crap! ...*eats ramen*... now all I need is [PixieStickChick]... and maybe [swabloo]...
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: *eat's green ramen that is really good*
2007-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: What's wrong?
2007-03-18 [nokaredes]: She doesn't like your green ramen...
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: Sorry.....
2007-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,I miss hiro
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2007-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Hiro?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-18 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2007-03-18 [nokaredes]: Her b/f...
2007-03-18 [Eloura]: *nods head understandingly*
2007-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...misty...? ...a boyfriend...? ...not possible...
2007-03-19 [nokaredes]: Don't be mean to Misty!
2007-03-19 [~Crimson Angel~]:                                                                           
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: The "misty" is just an urban legend... everyone knows that...
2007-03-19 [nokaredes]: Just like "Mortimer's heart" apparently...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...a heart?! ...*checks in chest*... good... nothing... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid news... too much work to do... I think I'll get rid of it...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q5im0Ssyyus
2007-03-19 [nokaredes]: I like the "Spider on drugs" thing even if I have heard of it before (by a real scientist)...
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...*the gang of chickens burst in*... *they mate continueously*...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... "the"...
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...sicko! ...you and that "the"...
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: B****! That's my ramen!
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps you*...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Ha! I spit in that ramen! ...*eats turkey noodle soup*...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I spit on your mama! ...last night!
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: I spit on your... grandma! ...god rest her zombie bones...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *forehead-chest-shoulder-shoulder-lips*... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: *head-shoulder-hand-butt*... macarena!
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!! Macaroni?!
2007-03-19 [Narcissistic Turkey]: This wiki is 932 days old...
2007-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: That's 6,524 in dog days...
2007-03-19 [Eloura]: Wow i miss alot.
2007-03-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: join the club eloura
2007-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Do the club have a health plan...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: NO, there is no health in Bob's Diner, how dare you even utter such words!!!
2007-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen with cockroaches swimming in it*... sure there's health!
2007-03-20 [nokaredes]: ...there was a preacher at my school today.
2007-03-20 [Pillowthief]: Did he rape anyone?
2007-03-20 [nokaredes]: Not that I'm aware of.
2007-03-20 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Only Catholic preachers...
2007-03-20 [nokaredes]: This guy is "Non-denominational"...
2007-03-20 [Pillowthief]: Ooooh, they get creative with their conversion. I like talking to them, they make me giggle.
2007-03-20 [Narcissistic Turkey]: *takes note of this*
2007-03-20 [nokaredes]: ...but in a manly way, right...?
2007-03-20 [Pedo pete]: He said his name was brother -Insert Unknown Given Birth Name Here-, but apparently he sent [nokaredes] an email proclaiming himself preacher -Insert Unknown Given Birth Name Here-.


I said he was a sinner for preaching intolerance of others. He said I was probably a lesbian. He was right.
2007-03-20 [Eloura]: *blinks and passes out jackets since they where all in this club together*
2007-03-20 [Pedo pete]: *Suggests you re-take english because your grammar is greatly lacking* *cough*We're*coughcough*
2007-03-21 [Eloura]: *claims being sick and tired* ...
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: *Throws a phonebook at both of you for excessive use of the asterisk*
2007-03-21 [Eloura]: *continues excessive use of asterisks and gets hit with phone book so looks shelb's number up* HA!
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Glad to be of help :P
2007-03-21 [Eloura]: You have no idea! *is in a continues talk to shelb about prom and that they should have ramen*
2007-03-21 [Pedo pete]: *coughs because I really am sore in the throat* *Phonebook magically appears and slaps head* Ow! *Exclaims* *Is attacked by two more phone books*Gawd-damnit!! Why phonebooks?? D:
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ***walks in wearing an "I love asterisks" tee-shirt***
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ***buys an asterisk shaped christmas ornament***
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ***walks in on Asterisk making out with Percent Sign*** ...you whore! It's over between us! ...slaps asterisk... changes to an "I love Italics" tee-shirt...
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *%!
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...oh god! There's an asterisk in my alphabet soup! ...and some arabic letters... and some roman numerals... and dollar signs... and a curly black hair... and a band-aid... and a used condom... and a toe........ *eats ramen instead*...
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: This is why I try not to comment on here. *Sigh*
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...It's okay... *pats your back*... *whispers to turkey*... It's not okay! He's got HIV!...
2007-03-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: http://www.starterupsteve.com/video/girl_bouncing.shtml
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*chokes on ramen*...
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]:
Access Denied (Policy_Denied)
Your system policy has denied access to the requested URL.

For assistance, contact your network support team.
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Crap. Maybe I do have HIV... or Gonasyphilaids! *Gasp*
2007-03-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: what if its herpegonasyphilaids?
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...or worse... what if it's the flu?!
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Oh no!
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: *bursts in*... Oh yeah!
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Oh no! My dads not going to believe a giant bowl of punch broke down this wall and trashed the place! 'Oh yeah?' Huh? 'Oh yeah??' Oh No!
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Yo dad ain't comin' back, boy! ...*makes out with your mom*... *sits on couch, unzips pants, opens a beer, and slaps your mom*... fetch me the remote, woman!
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Oh no!
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...oh no! ...I'm being sued! ...breaking and entering, property damage and... rape?!
2007-03-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: if your a straight guy, i can promise youll never orget your abcs again
http://www.starterupsteve.com/flash/html/abc_boob.shtml
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...or a gay chick...
2007-03-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...not that I've ever really had trouble remembering the alphabet...
2007-03-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: z is just plain scary...
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...that's it... from now on I'm going to "lol" at innapropriate moments...
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude... my grandma just got killed... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: lol! Sweet! ...how'd it happen?
2007-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...I take it someone hacked my password.
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Drive-by... and it was extreme!
2007-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...no. That's not right. *changes password anyway*
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...extreme!! *high five*...


You use the term "hacked" too lightly, my dear...
2007-03-21 [nokaredes]: I demand you change your name right now!
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...I demand you change yours!
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Haha!
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...hmm... last time I used this name it got me into some trouble...
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: I'm a fat ugly douchebag... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Say WHAT?!!
2007-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: That's partially slanderous, you know... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: I'm bored. You're boring. Stop being boring!
2007-03-21 [nokaredes]: I can see which one is talking by holding my cursor over the link and looking at the member number... (Turkey is 66480 and Mortimer is 92105!)
2007-03-21 [Narcissistic Turkey]: 66480 is my Christian name... call me Turkey.
2007-03-21 [Pillowthief]: How clever. (Bwahaha) :P
2007-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2007-03-22 [Narcissistic Turkey]:   
2007-03-22 [Eloura]: ... I lost
2007-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *glomps Turkey*
2007-03-23 [Narcissistic Turkey]: ...vzxcfjkwq! ...and I just showered too...
2007-03-23 [Narcissistic Turkey]: comment on turkey
2007-03-23 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Turkey suggests: Start=>Run, type in "command", then type deltree
2007-03-23 [Pillowthief]: C://run format U://www.elftown.com/user/pillowthief/
MSG03222007|SERVERSPIKE|ROUTEUSER91017|[Pillowthief]DELETEDFROMSERVER|ENDEND
2007-03-23 [Narcissistic Turkey]: But more importantly........



2007-03-23 [Narcissistic Turkey]: Ah... filling up this already overfilled wiki with a long poll is fun...
2007-03-23 [Eloura]: ..... Evil
2007-03-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I like the new banner. However, the turkey needs to look meaner...give it horns or something!
2007-03-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: k
2007-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha! ...banned again... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-24 [nokaredes]: ...I realized that I can't write that stuff I did this week 'cause most of it is illegal. However, I did meet a cop who told me a fat lie! Abuse of power is so much fun.
2007-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What stuff? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: ...stuff like getting a ride from a friend's house to where I live inside of a car trunk.
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: That reminds me, my friend is still in my trunk.
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Oooh, I like (i), but I think its needs a work over. Sketches just dont get my votes...
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Good, Im glad that Bobs finally doesnt think that [Sunrose] sucks.
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I heard that was because [Sunrose] is now the page owner (by force)...
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Ah, yeah. You dont mess with [Sunrose].
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: If only Bob's could spell "sponsored" right, now that [Sunrose] (supposedly) doesn't suck...
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: You could probably fix that yourself, you know...
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I don't know... the wiki-owner might get mad.
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Then why'd they not put a password on it?
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: *shrugs*
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Happy now?
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: Very much so, yes.
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I'm building a time capsule. Does anyone have suggestions of what I should put in it...?
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Money. But then you need to bury the time capsule. Anyone would would be digging and find a time capsule would be disappointed if there wasnt money in it. (Arrg, me buried treasure!)
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I am going to put money in it, but only because the US government is (supposedly) trying to get rid of pennies and the $1 bill...
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Half of these damn pop machines wont even take that stupid new dollar coin, and thats all the change machine will spit out now. Its a conspiracy.
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: Around here, everything takes the dollar coin, but the change machines only give quarters, dimes, and nickels... and I can't think of any machine that takes the penny anymore...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: At least it doesn't take your money... it takes mine, but doesn't give me anything...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Put drugs in the capsule...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: And "nok"! ...re-upload your old "banner"...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and we also need pixie's old one too...
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I don't know where to buy drugs. What old "banner"?
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: That one you made... some... tiger stripes having creature... I forget... I think it was a bunny... and pixie had that frog...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: And that one of David's up there isn't really a "banner"...
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I don't remember that banner.
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: ...I dont get the stickman banner. What's that have to do with Bobs?
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: Which one? Spitfire's? It has B's D in the background...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... but it's not really a "banner" for it...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: That stupid stickman of turkey's is more an inside joke... the dinglehopper can only draw stickpeople... so he started a weird "comic" thing with stick people... and then I added Bob... who owned a diner... and then he ripped it off and made it into a wiki... which I had to take from him, because it was my idea... but then sunrose stole it... for no reason... and she won't tell me why... you know... if she wasn't so old, I could swear she was on her period...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob is the one wearing a hat... the weird bug-like thing is George...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: hitmen united! My first wiki... and... only wiki...
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: I thought it was a duck with buck teeth...
2007-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: He was never that clear on George's origin... and also... the reason I hate teptep!
2007-03-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: hello
2007-03-25 [nokaredes]: Yes, may I help you?
2007-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Non, mon.
2007-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol how is everyone?
2007-03-26 [nokaredes]: Happy, because I am moving soon! Now all I need is a roommate...
2007-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots out misty's kneecaps*...
2007-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's a clone.
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...a clone without kneecaps isn't a very good clone, now is it...?
2007-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets bear traps*... just in case, you know... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*charges you $30,000 dollars*...
2007-03-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats yo ramen*
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Eww! Ramen?!! ...I hate that crap... you sicko... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo! Whitey! Where you at?!
2007-03-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Right here you dork brain. What do you want?
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I want... to eat some ramen... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -shakes head- You dork, i'm gone, bye for now!
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Later, masticator... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-26 [nokaredes]: *defenestrates Mortimer*
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *dusts self off*... hmm... I landed in grass... why am I dusty...? ...oh well... *eats ramen with pieces of glass in it*...
2007-03-26 [nokaredes]: Should I have opened that window first...? *copyrights glass flavored ramen*
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps...? Ha ha ha... good ol' Allis... *pats your back*... ow... there's glass in my hand... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-26 [nokaredes]: Does that mean there's glass in my back now...? Back-stabber! *points accusingly* *falls over dead*
2007-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I tried to stab you with a knife, but then I realized I didn't have a knife...
2007-03-26 [nokaredes]: *advertises from beyone the grave* Show Us Your Room!
2007-03-26 [Pedo pete]: Wait, if you're going to put in adverts, you should at least use a nice flashy GIF.....


Ha Ha! You're dead! And you just lost the game.
2007-03-27 [nokaredes]: I hate you. Stop reminding me about the game!! Or I'll put those catheters we found to good use.
2007-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*hokey*... *pokey*... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-28 [trexor]: did sunrose change the top of the page
2007-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah... I did... but she still hasn't given it back yet...
2007-03-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2007-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...get that "chan" off your name... *eats ramen*...
2007-03-29 [nokaredes]: ...why does Misty-chan have to change her name just to please you?
2007-03-29 [Pillowthief]: *Smacks lips while thinking of breakfast*
2007-03-29 [Eloura]: MRRRRRRRR
2007-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Because the suffix "chan" is annoying when used by Americans... as well as "kun", "sensei", "san", and "sama"...
2007-03-30 [~Crimson Angel~]:   SHUT THE HELL UP IT'S A FREE COUNTRY,AND I CAN DO WHATEVER THE HELL I WANT TO DO,SO LEAVE ME THE HELL ALONE AND JUST SHUT UP,K?!        
2007-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You youngsters these days... actually believing that it's a free country... *chortles and chokes on a mouthful of ramen*...
2007-03-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I HOPE YOU DIE CHOKING ON THAT RAMEN!
2007-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*dies choking on something else*...
2007-03-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'M GLAD YOU DIED!
2007-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*is dead*... *can't hear you*... *eats ramen somehow*...
2007-03-31 [nokaredes]: ...I've been gone from ET two days and there weren't even 10 comments here.
2007-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: It sounds like it's your fault then...
2007-03-31 [nokaredes]: It sounds like you guys don't comment unless I come on...
2007-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-03-31 [nokaredes]: Haha, I just did that in real life.
2007-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid youngsters... and your informal language consisting of words and expressions that are not considered appropriate for formal occasions...
2007-03-31 [nokaredes]: What are you talking about?
2007-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm talking about some rappers, you know...?
2007-03-31 [nokaredes]: I wonder if the band Mika knows what "mika" is slang for...
2007-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Randomness is just a myth... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-01 [nokaredes]: No one besides us is going to understand this conversation because we keep changing our comments.
2007-04-01 [sara(:]: Ok, I`m here Dustin/Junior. Now...uhm... I don`t know.
2007-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks Sara with a blunt object*... sore throat girl! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-01 [Eloura]: I WANT MY RAMEN!
2007-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it has rat poison in it... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-01 [Eloura]: I'll eat it.
2007-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Like heck you will! ...*eats it*...
2007-04-01 [Eloura]: BUT BUT BUT BUT THAT WAS MY SHRIMP RAMEN!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-04-01 [nokaredes]: I want to go see a movie... (I wonder if they'll let me bring ramen in)
2007-04-01 [Eloura]: I wanna see one to. (I don't think they will)
2007-04-01 [nokaredes]: I think they might... I've carried groceries in there before...
2007-04-01 [Pillowthief]: They freak out if I carry anything in. It helps having a big friend though, we usually moon them if they try anything. (A goth and a punk walk into a bar, the bartender leans over...)
2007-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: A blonde and a brunette are running from the cops... they see two sacks of potatoes and decide to hide in them... they empty out the bags on the ground, and get inside... the cops arrive and find potatoes all over the ground... they start poking at the bag that the blonde is in and she says, "po-tay-toe"... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-02 [sara(:]: You told the joke wrong.
2007-04-02 [nokaredes]: That must be why it's not funny.
2007-04-02 [sara(:]: Mhm. There were actually three women. A blonde, brunette, and red head. They were running from the cops and found a barn. They jumped into barrels of potatoes. The cops came in and hit the one the red head was in. The red head goes, "Meow." The cops say it was just a cat. They hit the one the brunette was in and she said, "woof." They said it was just a dog. They hit the one the blonde was in and she said, "Potatoes."
2007-04-02 [nokaredes]: ...that one's funny. ^_^
2007-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: k
2007-04-02 [sara(:]: Why thank you. ^_^
2007-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2007-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Nigga'! *pimp slaps sara*... I didn't tell the wrong joke... the joke I told is funny... but maybe a little too sophisticated for... blondes... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-02 [nokaredes]: ...if you keep insulting blondes like that, I might have to stop commenting... which in turn would lead B's D's omment-count to drop...
2007-04-02 [Pillowthief]: Deffinately cant do with out all those omments. *Starts a rally to raise money to invest in omment saving devices*
2007-04-02 [Eloura]: *pitches in 20$*
2007-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *gives you a penny*... back in my day, a penny would get you two sticks o' gum and whoopin'!
2007-04-02 [Pillowthief]: *Opens a Can'o'Whoopin' that he bought with the pinstriped-lunchmeat's penny while chewing on some gum*
2007-04-03 [sara(:]: Blondes are not as dumb as you think.
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, Sara... how many of your graduation exams did you pass...? ...*eats ramen*... *throws pennies at pillowthief*...
2007-04-03 [sara(:]: All of them.
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: *Buys more Can'o'Whoopin', but is too lazy to go to the store so he orders online!*
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]:
UPS delivers 123 cases of Can'o'Whoopy!


[Pillowthief] is disappointed.
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Shoulda gone with FedEx...
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: :(
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: {(°•º)}
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ]8^}
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: 
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?! .........lettuce?!!!
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: Damn, forgot the bacon.
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: Mmm, PLT.
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Poorly Lavished Toilets?
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: Penguin, Lettuce and Tomato. Usually I cheat and its only a PL. Really, you look quite tasty.
2007-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Freakin' cheater... *eats a PLT*... Pillow, Lettuce and Tomato!
2007-04-03 [Pillowthief]: Hey! That's mine!
2007-04-04 [nokaredes]: ... when spelled correctly, tomato has no "e"...
2007-04-04 [Pillowthief]: Thats how I spelled it. << >> <<
2007-04-04 [nokaredes]: ...well, edit your comment then, see if I care...
2007-04-04 [Pillowthief]: Heh.
2007-04-04 [nokaredes]: I want to put on a costume and go door-to-door and say "Trick-or-treat!" and see what people do. But with other people.
2007-04-04 [nokaredes]: We should recruit [punkin22] for the punkin pie...
2007-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid heather... hasn't been on here in a long time... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: A girl came skipping home from school one day. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled. "We were counting today, and all the other kids could only count to four, but I counted to 10. See? 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9,10!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "Yes, it's because you're blonde," her mother replied.


The next day, the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were saying the alphabet today, and all the other kids could only say it to D, but I said it to G. See? A, B, C, D, E, F, G!" "Very good," said her mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" Yes, pumpkin, it's because you're blonde."


The next day the girl came skipping home from school. "Mummy, Mummy," she yelled, "we were in gym class today, and when we showered, all the other girls had flat chests, but I have these!" And she lifted her tank top to reveal a pair of 36Cs. "Very good," said her embarrassed mother. "Is it because I'm blonde, Mummy?" "No... it's because you're 25."
2007-04-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yo,word to my homies!
2007-04-05 [Pillowthief]: I wish I owned this wiki so I could delete comments.
2007-04-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: like who's comments?
2007-04-05 [Pillowthief]: ...*sob*
2007-04-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you mean mine?
2007-04-05 [nokaredes]: I owned this wiki, for a time... it's not worth it...
2007-04-05 [Pillowthief]: I just want the delete comments privilege.
2007-04-05 [nokaredes]: Be a Guard then. Guards have those.
2007-04-05 [Eloura]: *watches*
2007-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I finally have the "delete comment" option again...
2007-04-05 [trexor]: did sunrose finally give it back
2007-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh...
2007-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]:
♠♠
2007-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Cheaply made penguins flipping people off are much better than cheaply made turkeys flipping people off...



2007-04-06 [Eloura]: Really???
2007-04-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: Hiya!!!
2007-04-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: how are you?
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: Ehh you?
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Misty wangs chung. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: Uhhhhhhhhhh ok.
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...What?! ...Ok! ...Get krunk!
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: *just kinda goes* Okkkk
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... more lime for that open wound, ma'am?
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: Yes Sir Penguin Sir!
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *gives you lemon instead... and a little salt and even some habanero sauce*...
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: *pouts has none*
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets the diner on fire*... ha ha! Now to collect the insurance money! ..............wait... I left all my insurance papers in there... and my lawyer was in the bathroom too! ...oh well... *eats ramen out in the cold*... it's cold out here... *steps back into the flaming diner*... muuuuch better...
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: *curls under a blanket in the flaming diner* It's warmer in here but there is still a draft..
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... them NFL drafters come by from time to time... *they draft some chickens and a couple of lions for their team*...
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: I heard they drafted a wolf this year.
2007-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: A wolf?! That's a very unusual thing to draft... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: I know, but better than the elephant from one year. *eats her own ramen*
2007-04-07 [nokaredes]: I almost spent Easter weekend in somebody's closet...
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: *raises eybrow and say's* ohhh really?
2007-04-07 [nokaredes]: Yup!
2007-04-07 [Eloura]: ok
2007-04-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: riiiiiiiight...
2007-04-08 [Eloura]: Dot dot dot...
2007-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*comes flying through the ceiling*... stupid Hulk!! *shakes fist at the sky*... *sits down at the bar and orders a big freakin' bowl of ramen*...
2007-04-08 [nokaredes]: I thought you burned the bar down... besides... "a big freakin' bowl of ramen" isn't on the menu...
2007-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Not here... that ramen shack down the road... *is sitting on ashes*...
2007-04-08 [Pillowthief]: Sure it is Nok...
2007-04-08 [Pillowthief]: "Nok nok nok"... 


Kinda like 'Nuk nuk nuk', only, not.
2007-04-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *shakes head*idiot.
2007-04-08 [Pillowthief]: Whhooowoowoowoowooo....
2007-04-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles evily*
2007-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets misty on fire*... *ramen arrives*... WOOOO!! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *clone goes poof*Hi!
2007-04-09 [nokaredes]: ...what's "nuk nuk nuk"?
2007-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets Nuk on fire*... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Vil vs. Ramen-eater...
2007-04-09 [Pillowthief]: What's 'nuk nuk nuk'?!? (Am I getting so old that these youngsters dont recognize good comedy when they see it?)


Its The Three Stooges!!!
2007-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I've always hated those three... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-09 [Eloura]: I knew that one! Lol
2007-04-10 [sara(:]: Yes, you are. ;D
2007-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *lights sara on fire*... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah yes... Curly, Larry, and Mo' Bitches... the story of three pimps... *eats ramen*... of course, they later changed his name to "Moe" after the lawsuit... as well as the whole "pimp" storyline...
2007-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly comes down with a severe case of pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis*... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-10 [Pillowthief]: Damn commercialized courts with their fancy-pants judges in dresses.
2007-04-10 [nokaredes]: *is quietly burning*
2007-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...burn quieter! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eiiU-Fky18s
2007-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Or for the best song ever...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aD0KPipoOuA
2007-04-10 [nokaredes]: *burns louder just to spite Mortimer* http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-fyCVMUbOlM
2007-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-04-13 [sara(:]: Is that honestly the best you could come up with?
2007-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh??
2007-04-13 [sara(:]: Directed towards Junior. Sorry.
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ........*lights sara on fire*... ha ha! You and Cody...
2007-04-13 [sara(:]: What about us?
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ha ha, that's what... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [sara(:]: Idiot...
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, I'm not the one on fire here... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [sara(:]: Good point. *puts out flames* Oh, and... *takes ramen and shoves it up his nose*
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*snorts ramen*...
2007-04-13 [sara(:]: ...Gross... Well, have fun snorting ramen. *disgusted look* `Night.
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...later, sore throat girl... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [nokaredes]: Ah ha! I knew you had an unhealthy obsession! ...because you're an addict! :O
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Who? ...sara and her drugs?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [nokaredes]: ...no. You.
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I assume you're talking to sara...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: No she was talking to you [Mortified Penguin],you idiot.
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...or was she talking to Misty?!
2007-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...%!&*#%!! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ..................*stabs misty*... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *clone goes poof*...?
2007-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *knife goes stab*... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-14 [sara(:]: My drugs?? Riiight...
2007-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: A professor at the University of Wisconsin says he's found a way to take the bitterness out of chedder cheese. Now, if he can only find a way to remove the arrogance from Wheat Thins...
2007-04-14 [sara(:]: You idiot...
2007-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Estupida...
2007-04-14 [nokaredes]: Haha! It's funny because Wheat Thins are arrogance personified.
2007-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen... angrily!!*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah... I assume that question mark means that you would like to hear my entire family history...


You see, it all began 5,000 years ago, about the time of the end of the Roman and Dinosaur war, when the dinosaur were wiped out. Rome was suffering through some desperate times. The war had left their army drastically diminished and neighboring countries continued to take advantage of their weakness. A simple countryman, Mortimer Penguinius, came up with a new way to get income for his government. He came up with a new type of noodled dish. He called it... ramen.


His new food brought visitors from all six corners of the globe. Rome's economy boomed. With all the income they were recieving, the Roman government was able to rebuild their army. Caesar felt threatened by Penguinius's popularity, so he had him decapitated. The only remaining member of the Penguinius clan was his young son, Mortanius Penguinius. Mortanius trained as a warrior and eventually raised a family of his own.


And so, Mortanius beget Mertunicus and Mertunicus beget Mercunifus and Mercunifus beget Bob and Bob beget Morcanius and Morcanius beget Mortafius and Mortafius was frozen in a glacier for 4,000 years...


Upon being unfrozen, Mortafius became a member of a local society of Ninja. He learned their ways and skills. He too taught them some things. Like toilet paper and how to make ramen. The society, much like ancient Rome, flourished with the help of the income from ramen. The ninjas took control of a local nation and made Mortafius their king. Mortafius raised a family and had children. His eldest son, Morticai, took over his throne after Mortafius choked to death on some ramen.


Throughout the ages, the Penguins ruled over the country which is today called Japan. After a coup d'état in Japan in 1452, the Turkay clan took control of Japan. Japan's never been the same since...


In 1889, Mortifis Penguin moved from Japan to America to escape the homosexual tyranny from the Turkeys. Arriving in Mexico, Mortifis settled down and married a local woman. Together, they had seventeen children. Five survived.


Mortimer, grandson of Mortifis, crossed the border into the United States and fled to Alabama. He married and raised a family of four. His son, Mortified, took his house after he passed on. Mortified raised a family there too, including his three sons, Mortified Penguin Jr., Playa101, and Light Mage.


And so, to carry on my family's proud history, I eat ramen each and every day. It's gotten us through some hard times, this ramen... *eats ramen*...


Man, I hate Neji.................
2007-04-15 [Eloura]: *acts as if she read the whole history but stops to say* I won't be on here much more...
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Why?!!?!!!! ...*eats ramen*... *cracks knuckles*...
2007-04-15 [Eloura]: Grounded from elftown..... *cries a bit* I'm gonna miss the randomness of Bob's Diner....
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Grounded from Elftown?! ...No such thing! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHY THE BLOODY HELL WOULD YOU THINK THAT A QUESTION MARK MEANT THAT I WANTED TO HEAR YOUR FAMILY HISTORY YOU MORON?!?!
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Point being, I hate Neji.
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why?
2007-04-15 [Eloura]: Yes grounded from elftown, trhere is such a thing. Lol like that one Misty!
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?oh thanks.
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... there appears to be a spider in my ramen... *slams the ramen down*... *calls the restuarant*... B****!!! I thought I specifically said no spiders!!!
2007-04-15 [nokaredes]: What does the question mark mean? And what does "homosexual tyranny" mean?
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shrugs*... *eats ramen off the floor*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't know what "homosexual tyranny" means,but the question mark and three dots meant I had no comment.
2007-04-15 [Eloura]: BYE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: bye
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: What's this? Going somewhere misty?!! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,I was saying bye to [Eloura] she left.
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Aww...... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats yo ramen*
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *shivs misty in the kidney*
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *clone disappears*What the bloody hell is shivs?
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at the "no clones" sign on the wall*... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats Neji flavored ramen*YUMMY!
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats misty flavored ramen*... *vomits*... man! That tastes like sh*t!
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats [Mortified Penguin] flavored ramen*...*chokes then vomits*...Man this taste like babby sh*t!
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... "babby" sh*t... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I assume that question mark means that you would like to hear about my neighbor's family history!


...it all began 800 years ago with Jim Hitler III..........


...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*
2007-04-15 [nokaredes]: This conversation seems to be going in circles...
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...semi-circles...
2007-04-15 [nokaredes]: Deny it all you want.
2007-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Ok, I will... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
2007-04-16 [sara(:]: Riiight...
2007-04-16 [nokaredes]: I am this close to shoving an x-acto knife into my mom's eye socket right now. >_<
2007-04-16 [sara(:]: o_o
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you'll get blood on your knife and stain it up... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-16 [nokaredes]: I can buy another for under $10...
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: For the other eye, I assume...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: It would seem as though someone has spiked this ramen... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-16 [sara(:]: Riiight... Anyway...
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Sara and Cody sitting in a tree... but Sara's too fat and the limb broke. .....*eats ramen*...
2007-04-16 [sara(:]: Shut the fuck up Jr. This is the last time I come to Bob`s Diner. Asshole.
2007-04-16 [nokaredes]: Spiked the ramen with what?
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Huck huck hayuck... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Rat poison...? ...*coughchokeeatsramen*...
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... I don't think I'll go to Virginia college...
2007-04-16 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, reminds me of Columbine, but with bigger kids and bigger death ratios...
2007-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: The gunman beat the record... as me and Turkey were just discussing... we're gonna beat that record... you'll see... *eats ramen*... and I'm reading shakespeare's Caesar right now, son... *eats more ramen*...
2007-04-16 [Pillowthief]: "Go, my little Fairy Minions... Destroy."
2007-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I got lions for that... *points at the pride of lions with brass knuckles*...
2007-04-17 [Pillowthief]: Yes, but the pain and humiliation of your land being destoyed by little, furry, winged bears just does it for me.
2007-04-17 [nokaredes]: It would be even worse humiliation if they were little, bald, winged bears...
2007-04-17 [Pillowthief]: ...Thats just downright cruel.
2007-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2007-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... I'm bored... and Paint sucks...
2007-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: The only ones allowed to eat ramen are the members of the InoHinoGo Trio (Featuring Dalton)... *eats ramen*... being, of course me, Turkey, and Spitfire... also Dalton... who isn't on here... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-18 [nokaredes]: You should take a pregnancy test. Those are fun.
2007-04-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... It appears as though I'm pregnant... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*wonders why you were taking pregnancy tests in the first place*...
2007-04-18 [Pillowthief]: Yay for peeing on a stick!
2007-04-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I pee on trees... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-18 [sunabozu]: its been a longtime
2007-04-18 [nokaredes]: I was because there's no possible way for me to be pregnant :) I also convinced some of my friends, including boys...
2007-04-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm still not convinced... I haven't seen the stick for myself...
2007-04-18 [sunabozu]: hey go on youtube and check my cousin out type in "see the meat" its the first video plz comment it
2007-04-18 [nokaredes]: Why do you want to "see the stick"? o_O
2007-04-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I want proof!
2007-04-19 [nokaredes]: Proof of what?
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: That you're not pregnant...
2007-04-19 [Pillowthief]: Nok's pregnant.
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Totally. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-04-19 [Pillowthief]: See how she's avoiding the subject and pretending ignorance? Yup, definately pregnant.
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...She's pregnant... I hope it isn't mine, though... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*
2007-04-19 [nokaredes]: I do not avoid, I was on the telephone. I'm not pregnant. And I will not even address the total lack-of-sex-with-Mortimer-ever thing.
2007-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: You know we did it... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-19 [nokaredes]: Only if you Roofied me...
2007-04-19 [nokaredes]: http://www.deviantart.com/deviation/53479985/
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: You bet I did... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Why is Naruto hand freakin' huge?! ...and why is the rose stem so loose?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Naruto and Hinata look cute together.
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Dustin, if you're readin' this, you better get to work on Mrs. McMinn's outline! It's due tomorrow!
2007-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, new Shin Chan!
2007-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...?
2007-04-20 [nokaredes]: I have Everclear :)
2007-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck is that...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-20 [nokaredes]: Alcohol.
2007-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...so you're a drunkard...?
2007-04-21 [Pedo pete]: No, she just wanted to let you guys all know she's cool for having alcohol and being underage..... She is SUCH a rebel!! *Rolls eyes, and goes back to not being online*
2007-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh... makes sense... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-22 [nokaredes]: ...Rae, you ruined the cool.
2007-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, I got several types of tequila at my house, and no one cares! This is Alabama, FOOL, where the criminally insane are considered a notch above normal; where drunks always have a chat with the sheriff after being pulled over (and they get off with a warning, too, only because the sheriff is as drunk as they are); and where black people aren't ridiculed as much (no offense to our fellow African-American members).
2007-04-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2007-04-24 [Eloura]: *runs in eats ramen runs out* Mwhahahah.
2007-04-24 [sunabozu]: did you go on youtube?
2007-04-24 [nokaredes]: I don't live in Alabama.
2007-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I went to yo' youtube thing... and... it was disturbing... *eats ramen*...


I can tell you're not from Alabama... you're one of those rude, gay supporting, bagel eating, cappuccino sipping, underage drinking, liberal whackados... *drinks macchiato*...
2007-04-24 [sunabozu]: what he said
2007-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, what he said... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-24 [sunabozu]: and so on,with a side of bacon
2007-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what? No sausage?
2007-04-24 [sunabozu]: and some punanee
2007-04-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: NO SAUSAGE BAD!
2007-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: And some Tequila...
2007-04-25 [Eloura]: mrrr?
2007-04-25 [nokaredes]: I don't eat bagels...
2007-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: What? Too good for bagels now? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-25 [sunabozu]: shizzam!..with a baegel
2007-04-25 [Pillowthief]: Bagels and tequila dont go together...
2007-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure they do! ...anything goes with tequila... *eats ramen... with tequila!*
2007-04-26 [sunabozu]: it even goes good with cat, and cat is a fine meal lol
2007-04-26 [nokaredes]: Oookay... this is bordering on disturbing conversation now...
2007-04-26 [Pillowthief]: Mmm, sandwiches...
2007-04-27 [Death's Die-Ary]: um okay..where should i start?
2007-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, wassup Death's Diarhea! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-27 [sunabozu]: *throws dead cat in morti's ramen*
2007-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...there was already a dead cat in my ramen... that's just not nice, man... *eats ramen depressingly in the rat-infested corner*
2007-04-27 [sunabozu]: *goes over and eats the rats*
2007-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, that's just sick! Cook it first! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-27 [sunabozu]: my people eat raw meat
2007-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, so it's "your people" now, is it?! Again with the freakin' racism, man! This world would be much better if racism and black people didn't exist, nigga'! You'd think they would discuss this at Capitol Hill, but noooooo, it's all about Iraq!! Don't even get me started about the Mexican border and the Minute-Men! That reminds me of my fence... gotta go fix that thing before the immigrants get in... *eats ramen that was honorably made in MEXICO*...
2007-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *dances*
2007-04-28 [sunabozu]: im not being racist damn it!
2007-04-28 [nokaredes]: My neighbor is racist... towards Americans! XD
2007-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ..."Americans"...? ...I don't recall that being a race...
2007-04-28 [sunabozu]: hey yeah
2007-04-28 [nokaredes]: ...he's a... countryist?
2007-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Against himself?
2007-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...besides... there's no such country as "America"...
2007-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]:   [Mortified Penguin] YOU ARE SO IMMATURE YOU NEED TO GROW UP,YOU ARE MORE ANNOYING THAN ME,AT LEAST I KNOW WHEN TO BE SERIOUS,I DON'T EVER REMEMBER A TIME ON HERE WHERE YOUB WERE SERIOUS UNLESS YOU COUNT BEING SERIOUSLY ANNOYING!  
2007-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty... don't be so annoying, man... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not in the mood for this,I'm never coming here again,and I'm going to tell my friends to not come here either cause you are an annoying,retared,jerk who needs to get a life.*walks out*
2007-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you have friends...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate the world today
You're so good to me
I know but I can't change
Tried to tell you
But you look at me like maybe
I'm an angel underneath
Innocent and sweet
Yesterday I cried
Must have been relieved to see
The softer side
I can understand how you'd be so confused
I don't envy you
I'm a little bit of everything
All rolled into one
Chorus:
I'm a bitch, I'm a lover
I'm a child, I'm a mother
I'm a sinner, I'm a saint
I do not feel ashamed
I'm your hell, I'm your dream
I'm nothing in between
You know you wouldn't want it any other way


So take me as I am
This may mean
You'll have to be a stronger man
Rest assured that
When I start to make you nervous
And I'm going to extremes
Tomorrow I will change
And today won't mean a thing


Chorus


Just when you think, you got me figured out
The season's already changing
I think it's cool, you do what you do
And don't try to save me


Chorus


I'm a bitch, I'm a tease
I'm a goddess on my knees
When you hurt, when you suffer
I'm your angel undercover
I've been numb, I'm revived
Can't say I'm not alive
You know I wouldn't want it any other way
2007-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: That song sucks, yo... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-29 [nokaredes]: He's not a countryist against himself because he's only been in the U.S. a couple of years and doesn't consider himself American yet.
2007-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: The term would be "United States Citizen"... not American...
2007-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]:
"Headstrong"


Circling your, circling your, circling your head,
Contemplating everything you ever said
Now I see the truth, I got doubt
A different motive in your eyes and now I’m out
See you later
I see your fantasy, You want to make it a reality paved in gold
See inside, Inside of our heads (yeah)
Well now that’s over
I see your motives inside, decisions to hide


[Chorus:]
Back off I’ll take you on
Headstrong to take on anyone
I know that you are wrong
Headstrong we’re Headstrong
Back off I’ll take you on
Headstrong to take on anyone
I know that you are wrong and this is not where you belong
I can’t give everything away
I won’t give everything away


[Verse 2:]
Conclusions manifest, your first impressions got to be your very best
I see you’re full of shit, and that’s alright
That’s how you play, I guess you’ll get through every night
Well now that’s over
I see your fantasy, you want to make it a reality paved in gold
See inside, inside of our heads (yeah) Well now that’s over
I see your motives inside, decisions to hide


[chorus:]


[Verse 3:]
I know, I know all about [repeat 3x]
I know, I know all about your motives inside, and your decision to hide


[chorus:]
2007-04-29 [nokaredes]: No, the term would not be "United States citizen" because he considers himself a citizen, as he has a green card and his rights as a citizen. He does not, however, consider himself part of the culture.
2007-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: "America" doesn't have a specific culture...
2007-04-29 [nokaredes]: Except he thinks it does. Hence why I said something about it.
2007-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-04-30 [sunabozu]: yknow japan and china own most of america
2007-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: And to think all this time I thought it was the U.S., Mexico, and those weirdo Canadians...
2007-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: That Pillow hasn't been here in a while... *eats ramen*... *hates [The Dark Wolf]*...
2007-05-01 [Pillowthief]: Im more of a thief really, than a pillow...
2007-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh... good... I can sleep easier at night...
2007-05-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: heyhey, no need to be hating on peoples!!
2007-05-01 [Pillowthief]: Well, not really. I already have taken your pillows. I hope you get neck cramps.
2007-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *rests his head on road kill*
2007-05-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -blink- that's mean pillow...why is everyone so mean!?
2007-05-01 [Pillowthief]: What can I say? I steal pillows.
2007-05-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -clutchs pillow- EVIL!! YOU SPEAK EVIL!!
2007-05-01 [Pillowthief]: *Mmhf!*
2007-05-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -hands pillow- okay, here's my pillow. ASk, don't steal ^__^
2007-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals white's pillow... as well as Pillow's business*
2007-05-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -slaps at penguin- you jerk! Why'ed you do that? -grabs back pillow-
2007-05-01 [Pillowthief]: I didnt want that pillow anyway. *Hmph*
2007-05-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: OHHHHHH What's wrong with my pillow? Is it not good enough for you or something!? -=pout-
2007-05-01 [Pillowthief]: Uh, no, no, that's not what I meant at all!




Blame Penguin.
2007-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, blame Penguin.
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: I should make a poster that says that.
2007-05-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Oh i do, i blame everything on penguin....and ya you should nokaredes ^__^ i'ed help you!
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: I was thinking bumper stickers :P
2007-05-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I can live with that too!
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: What? No mouse pads?
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: All cool people have laptops (and thus no mice).
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe you have confused the word "cool" with "severely retarded"... *is going to get a laptop*... and laptops can have mice, you know...
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: 


My mouse is cooler than yours. It's "WiFi'ed"... :P
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: My mouse says "Microsoft" on it... and it emits harmful radiation...
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: If I see that stupid running pickle of yours one more time, so help me... *cracks [nokaredes]'s knuckles (so I don't get arthritis in my own)*...
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: I have no knuckles.
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: ...cactus. Cactus. As in non-pickle. Bah, you anti-FF fan you, bah.
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: 


That shirt is much better...


And I know darn well who Cactuar is...
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: Atleast you know what it is. 1 point for you. -5 points for not liking it. And Nok is weird.
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I like Final Fantasy... not the stinkin' pickle, though...
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Everybody knows nok is weird...
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: I tell people that I'm weird.
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Which is one of the things that make you weird.
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: *writes that down*
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: That and the fact you have no knuckles...
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Which might make writting that down a little hard...
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: *Nods*
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets an orphanarium on fire*
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: Burn you bastards, burn!
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Mmm... char-grilled orphans...
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *pimp slaps Tiny Tim*... fetch me some ramen, boy!!
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: No, it just means I have no joints in my hand. Writing is fine for me ^_^
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *smashes your hand with a hammer*... doesn't look fine to me...
2007-05-02 [Pillowthief]: ...Nok = Salad Fingers
2007-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Ick! Salad!
2007-05-02 [nokaredes]: Who or what is "Salad Fingers"?
2007-05-03 [Pillowthief]: (Recommends Nok to search internet for said 'Salad Fingers')
2007-05-03 [nokaredes]: (Tells Pillowthief that she is lazy.)
2007-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: (eats ramen)
2007-05-03 [Pillowthief]:

Portrait of Nok
2007-05-03 [nokaredes]: I have hair, I'll have you know...
2007-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *shaves your head*
2007-05-03 [Blvd. of broken dreams]: boo *runs and hides* hehehe...
2007-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons you and follows the trail of blood*... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ....you guys have gotten to a whole new level of baziar!
2007-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You misspelled that...
2007-05-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: don't care, you still understood it
2007-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: No I didn't... *doesn't understand it*... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: yeah right, you're a lier!!! -glomps penguin-
2007-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You misspelled 'liar'...
2007-05-04 [nokaredes]: Why do you care what she misspells...?
2007-05-04 [Pillowthief]: You misspelled nokaredes...
2007-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Who...?
2007-05-04 [Eloura]: *pokes everyone*
2007-05-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Penguin is like a spell check from hell....he does it all the time
2007-05-04 [Eloura]: ok.
2007-05-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: by the way, pillow, i like the picture
2007-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Sometimes I just don't understand girls... like, why do they get offended when I pimp slap them and call them ho's?! What's this world coming to...... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -glare- you're the hoe, and don't even try to call your self a "pimp" You'ed be lucky to be able to pimp a turkey!
2007-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I is a pimp, ho... and I could pimp a Turkey anyday...
2007-05-04 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -rolls eyes- righ, keep telling yourself that
2007-05-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: gurls poem~~
I shave my legs,
I sit down to pee.
And I can justify
any shopping spree.
Don't go to a barber,
but a beauty salon.
I can get a massage
without a hard-on.
I can balance the check book,
I can pump my own gas.
Can talk to my friends,
about the size of my ass.
My beauty's a masterpiece,
and yes, it takes long.
At least I can admit,
to others when I'm wrong.
I don't drive in circles,
at any cost.
And I don't have a problem,
admitting I'm lost.
I never forget,
an important date.
You just gotta deal with it,
I'm usually late.
I don't watch movies,
with lots of gore.
Don't need instant replay,
to remember the score.
I won't lose my hair,
I don't get jock itch.
And just cause I'm assertive,
Don't call me a bitch.
Don't say to your friends,
Oh yeah, I can get her.
In your dreams, my dear,
I can do better!
Flowers are okay,
But jewellery's best.
Look at me you idiot...
Not at my chest!!!!!
I don't have a problem,
With Expressing my feelings.
I know when you're lying,
You look at the ceiling.
DON'T call me a GIRL ,
a BABE or a CHICK .
I am a WOMAN.
Get it?, you DICK???
2007-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *backhands misty*... Can I call you a "ho" then? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-05-06 [Pillowthief]: ...She looked at it like it was a cruisant, so I SHOWED her my pimp hand.



2007-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... "cruisant"...
2007-05-06 [Pillowthief]: ...Mmm... "news-paper-colored-breakfast-sandwich"
2007-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...lunch sandwich, darn it... lunch!
2007-05-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Breakfast sounds better
2007-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: This thing is so going on the menu...


  



http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/18493874/?GT1=9951
2007-05-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: OH! Penguin, you shouldn't sell family as food -huggles- i'm kidding with you, just so you know
2007-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but... my family is all penguins... don't make me tell you my family history again!
2007-05-07 [Pillowthief]: ...Does that calf have 6 legs?
2007-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: But, of course...
2007-05-07 [nokaredes]: We should add Peruvian frog juice to the menu, too...
2007-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: But... I don't need any... as I have no asthma, no anemia, great brain activity, and I'm already very sexy and charming...
2007-05-07 [nokaredes]: Other people who visit might not be so lucky... I, for one, have asthma...
2007-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and that other problem...
2007-05-07 [nokaredes]: What other problem?
2007-05-07 [Pillowthief]: Hmm. I dont have asthma. Or anemia.
2007-05-07 [nokaredes]: ...what other problem?!
2007-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Not knowing is part of the problem... *eats chicken ramen, because someone ate my pork*...
2007-05-07 [nokaredes]: Well, tell me what the problem is so's I can fix it!
2007-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I... I already told you! Don't you remember?! ...*sigh*... *adds that to your list*...
2007-05-08 [sunabozu]:




















































































































































































HA HA WHO'S TAKING UP THE PAGE NOW!*LMAO*






























































































































































































































































































































































































































































































































2007-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... you...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-05-08 [nokaredes]: My list?!
2007-05-08 [sunabozu]: *bust bottle on the ground*
2007-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: You... you don't even know about the list...? ...*adds that to your list*...
2007-05-09 [Pillowthief]: *Pushes Soda Pop, who staggers... Right into the broken glass! Soda Pop suffers severe cuts of the foot*
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *points and laughs at [sunabozu]* *doesn't care about the list*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... not caring about the list, huh...? ...*adds that to the list*...
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *ignores you and your pointless talk of lists*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*gives you your fifty pounds of required medicine*...
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: ...oh, so you're a psychiatrist now...?
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... yeah... that's it... *hides his business card saying "Mortified Penguin: Certified Drug Dealer"*...
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *ignores the ziploc baggies of medicine*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... I don't like the looks of that attitude... better take some of these too... *hands you 20 bags of drugs labeled, "assorted"*...
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *scratches off the "if ingested, induce vomiting immediatly" warning label*
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *ignores them and thus does not ingest any anyways*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *force feeds you*
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: *force feeds nokaredes the bloddy peices of glass from his back*
2007-05-09 [Eloura]: *pokes everyone*
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: Why me? [Pillowthief]'s the one who tripped you!
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *is dead*
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *haunts the diner*
2007-05-09 [Eloura]: MRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROW
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: *then feeds pillowthief the glass*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't feed pillowthief the glass! Glass gives him his powers!! NOOO!!! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: then i will just fart in his general direction
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ........he feeds off those and turns into a mutant! NOOO!!
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: i can turn into a monster too,a monster of mass destruction
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: ...he didn't say monster, he just said mutant. Why does mutant equal monster to you?
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Those mutants are quite monstrous.
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: i can turn into a giant acid spiting furby
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons you*
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: *screatches*ow!!!!!!
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *lights you on fire*
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: *cannot be set on fire* *is glad to be a ghost*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ......*calls the ghostbusters*.
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: They're out of business... didn't you get the memo?
2007-05-09 [sunabozu]: *is crispy*
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*calls the spiritcrushers*...
2007-05-09 [Pillowthief]: Is wondering why Soda Pop would pull a bloody piece of glass out of his back when his feet are all cut up? I mus not be the only one who's pushing him onto sharp objects...


*Pillowthief's mutant powers reach critical levels! He lets out a Britney Spears yell!*


Hee-nuup-chuck!
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: Well, he's annoying. And not in the good way. What do you expect?
2007-05-09 [Pillowthief]: Im not a cigarette. You're a cigarette.
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! Robot Chicken?!
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: ...the next time I log into ET, I might have colours! :D
2007-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Ten bucks says she uses purple.
2007-05-09 [nokaredes]: ...no one's going to take you up on that bet.
2007-05-09 [Pillowthief]: Very good Fatone.
2007-05-14 [nokaredes]: ...way to kill the conversation, [Pillowthief].
2007-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...murderer... (Joey Fatone sucks!)
2007-05-14 [nokaredes]: Why hallo thar, Mortimer. I wasn't aware you were on. We should have an enemies relation or something...
2007-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: We really should.
2007-05-14 [Pillowthief]: I want to be Hong Kong Phoowey. That's one badass dog.
2007-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I hate that dog... and Lassie... now, there's the dog you wanna shoot...
2007-05-15 [sunabozu]: *walks in and punches nokaredes*
2007-05-15 [nokaredes]: ...what?!
2007-05-15 [Lethan]: *punches nokaredes too*
2007-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks nokaredes*... all the cool kids were doing it... *also does drugs*... darn peer pressure...
2007-05-15 [sunabozu]: i only did it because I'm "annoying"
2007-05-15 [Pillowthief]: Atleast he admits it... Step one to recovery.
2007-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Step two gets a little gruesome...
2007-05-16 [nokaredes]: I don't even know who you are, [Lethan]!
2007-05-16 [sunabozu]: what!? what!?
2007-05-16 [nokaredes]: ...copycat!
2007-05-16 [nokaredes]: *staples fake cat ears to [sunabozu]'s head*
2007-05-16 [sunabozu]: ow! what the hell!*growling*
2007-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...dude... cats don't growl... except, of course, the rare Albanian Growling Cat...
2007-05-17 [sunabozu]: i aint a cat
2007-05-17 [nokaredes]: You look like a cat... with... those ears... *staples a tail too* Now you really do! :D
2007-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and those whiskers... *hot glues some whiskers to soda's face*...
2007-05-17 [Pillowthief]: Where'd Soda Pop go? And what's with this cat? (Is it growling at me?!?)
2007-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you're too paranoid... *hides growling cat behind his back*...
2007-05-18 [nokaredes]: Haha! (At least I understand what you meant, [Pillowthief]...)
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Not if I delete your comment!
2007-05-18 [Pillowthief]: Aha! I love comment deleting!
2007-05-18 [Pillowthief]: *:( It wont let me delete comments on other people's wikis...*
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...unless I gave you B's D...
2007-05-18 [Pillowthief]: ...Which would be nice...
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it suuuure would... *pats your back*... *wipes off the grime from your back*... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-18 [Pillowthief]: *Ewww*
Ramen.
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I know, man... I freakin' hate ramen... only losers and college dropouts eat ramen... *eats a big heaping bowl of ramen*...
2007-05-18 [nokaredes]: I've had B's D before (sounds like a disease) and it's not that great.
2007-05-18 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, I wonder why I dont eat ramen then. *shrug* Guess Im not as much of a loser as I thought I was!
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-18 [sunabozu]: *eats rats*
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *idly rubs his crotch*... *watches films about penguins killing turkeys*...
2007-05-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: BBBBBBBBBOBBBBBBBBBBB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's over there in the corner, silently crying...
2007-05-18 [nokaredes]: Obviously not silently enough, if you know he's there... while watching films... presumably in the dark...
2007-05-18 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Horror films? -grabs popcorn-
2007-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what's that about Whore Films?!
2007-05-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Not "penguins life in pictures", HORROR!!! Scary movies!
2007-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...like Happy Feet?!! ...NOHOHOOO!!! *silently sobs with Bob*
2007-05-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles both bob and penguin- I liked happy feet. It was a cute movie. Not scary you silly duck!
2007-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Duck? DUCK?!
2007-05-19 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: yes, duck, you are a duckling lolololol
2007-05-20 [nokaredes]: *ducks*
2007-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Man, duck you...
2007-05-20 [nokaredes]: ...for restarting comments on this wiki yet again? I see how it is...
2007-05-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: duck you too
2007-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*removes one of nokaredes's extra toes*...
2007-05-20 [nokaredes]: ...sicko... with your extra-body-parts-fetishes...
2007-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*has a third nipple*... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-20 [Pillowthief]: *Chomp* *Not anymore*
2007-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*grows another*...
2007-05-21 [weasel2]: who cooked be becuse thay brunt me
2007-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I think you misspelled a few of those words... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-21 [weasel2]: look im a weasel i cant spelll that good
2007-05-21 [Pillowthief]: He's got a point. That's pretty good for a weasel.
2007-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I would think weasels would get a good education... Since they get so much of our tax money...
2007-05-22 [Pillowthief]: Daddy bought everything for those weasels, and looking at our president here in the US, I guess that doesnt buy an education...
2007-05-22 [nokaredes]: ...someone should add "a half-eaten cantalope slice with kitten slobber on it" to the menu somewhere because I want to sell of this half-eaten cantalope slice with kitten slobber on it that I have, but am too lazy to edit the page.
2007-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! But you typed all that?!!
2007-05-22 [nokaredes]: Typing is a lot easier then adding it to the menu... You should add "shitake sushi with kitten slobber on it" while you're at it...
2007-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...never! Go eat some shitake!
2007-05-22 [Pillowthief]: You have salivating kittens, Nok?
2007-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Not for long... *cracks knuckles*...
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: They must be super-bored.
2007-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Only because their owner isn't that exciting...
2007-05-23 [weasel2]: thay do not let us in school
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: Nok bores cat I hear.
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: Lucky weasels.
2007-05-23 [weasel2]: run from cats
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: Dont worry, bored cats arent interested in running too much.
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: Where'd Alle's bored cats go?
2007-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: They died of boredom...
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: No no, the page, Allie Bores Cats - I cant remember the wiki name...
2007-05-23 [nokaredes]: I just have the one salivating kitten. He's not that bored, he just likes to try to steal my food a lot. And do you mean Allie bores cats a lot?
2007-05-23 [sunabozu]: *walks in* hey guys,nokaredes
2007-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: "walks in"...? Did you ever actually walk out...?
2007-05-23 [sunabozu]: i disappear when i leave
2007-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...how do you know?!
2007-05-23 [Pillowthief]: Yay for bored cats!
2007-05-24 [nokaredes]: I think he would know... and [Pillowthief], why do you like bored cats so much?
2007-05-24 [Fearathress]: Wow, this place has changed a bit.
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Not really... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: The only way it's changed is it now has more ads...


Tellrius



*coughcough* Sorry....
2007-05-24 [Fearathress]: LOL


So how is everyone?
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Decent enough.
2007-05-24 [Fearathress]: *nods* Good good.
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*throws bunnies out a nearby window*... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I prefer to toss kittens out the window. *throws a few Kittens*
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but puppies make a bigger splat when they land... *hurls a puppy*...
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Noooo!! I like puppies!! *jumps out the window after it.*
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but... it's a 25-story building! ...*gets recorder*... *video tapes you falling*...
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *grabs the dog and then grabs the second story ledge.* Holy Crap that was close!!
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it... *throws out another puppy*... *records*...
2007-05-24 [Fearathress]: *sits back eating her pasta and watches* But kittens make a better sound.
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *drops the rest of the way and puts the puppy down and catches the other then pulls out a sniper rifle and shoots the camera* HA!
2007-05-24 [Fearathress]: *laughs*
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I is acrobatic.
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets out back-up camera*
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *goes to shot the backup*...Damn, I'm out of bullets!!
2007-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *is recording*... *throws another puppy*...
2007-05-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *to busy trying to reload the gun and gets hit by the puppy* Dang it!!
2007-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *got it all on film*... *puts it on the internet*...
2007-05-25 [Pillowthief]: *Downloads it off the internet*
2007-05-25 [Xeroh Kanoe]: *laughs at the video* Wait... Son of a...
2007-05-25 [Fearathress]: *Watches video and laughs*
2007-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hey! No illegally downloading that footage! ...or I don't get paid!
2007-05-25 [Pillowthief]: *already sold*
2007-05-25 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Donate to your favorite fang. 
2007-05-25 [Fearathress]: *illegally downloads* Hehehe and how would u know.. hehehe
2007-05-25 [Pillowthief]: *Screams bloody murder like the hypocrite lead singer of Metallica*
2007-05-25 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Donate dang it!!
2007-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of Metallica, I just bought the new Linkin Park CD...
2007-05-25 [Fearathress]: o.o
2007-05-27 [Mortified Penguin]: 


Naruto has a big erection... *eats ramen*...
2007-05-28 [nokaredes]: ...and, like Kakashi and Pakkun, nobody here cares.
2007-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, you know you like it...
2007-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2007-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets stuff on fire*
2007-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2007-05-28 [Eloura]: I have been setting thing on fire all night. Me hungry now. *searches for ramen*
2007-05-28 [nokaredes]: ...don't have to search far at B's D...
2007-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a bowl of ramen taped to the bottom of every chair... for, uh... emergencies...
2007-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Now... I don't often call for the assistance of my minions- er, I mean, members, but I need you wieners- I mean, winners, to go put your usernames in the "ugly" section of this wiki. 100 signatures
2007-05-28 [Pillowthief]: Somehow, I dont feel bad about doing that.
2007-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...maze of guile!
2007-05-29 [Pillowthief]: Did you ever complete that?
2007-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Why yes, yes I did.
2007-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah... I love pestering that same group of losers... it does my heart good.
2007-05-29 [Pillowthief]: Wow, that was interesting. They're still yelling at me over messages. They need to grow up. They even took my name off!
2007-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I put it back on... I can be very irksome when dealing with them...
2007-05-29 [Pillowthief]: Heh, that's funny.
2007-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: They comment too often... I think I'll stop watching it now... *eats ramen*... but anyway... back to more important topics... such as, which song sound better on the new Linkin Park CD? I say http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=paIf4DBM6QI but Turkey says http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oBm6LRTHeWw
2007-05-29 [Eloura]: *grabs ramen and eats in haste*
2007-05-30 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, after much concideration I have come to the conclusion that.... They both suck.
2007-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll be hearing from my lawyer...
2007-05-30 [Pillowthief]: Not if I kill him before he speaks!
2007-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Then you'll be hearing from my other lawyers! ...except Jim... he can only use sign language...
2007-06-01 [Lethan]: but he exclaims them pretty fiercely, i nearly lost an eye in my last court case with him there.
2007-06-03 [Pillowthief]: Dead! They're ALL DEAD!!!
2007-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *hires pillowthief as my lawyer*
2007-06-03 [nokaredes]: You can only do that if he consents...
2007-06-03 [Pillowthief]: Cooperates with prosecuting attourney and puts Mort away for life. Times 2x.
2007-06-03 [Pillowthief]: Then commits suicide.
2007-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a terrible lawyer...
2007-06-04 [nokaredes]: Depends on whose side he was on...
2007-06-04 [Pillowthief]: *Is Dead*
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *would bury and/or spit on you, but is in jail for 2 life sentences*... what am I in for anyway...?
2007-06-04 [Pillowthief]: Dead men tell no secrets...
2007-06-04 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Sad men write them down.
2007-06-04 [nokaredes]: ...music piracy. The kind that involves eyeliner and murder.
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats a giraffe*... want some? There's plenty of neck left...
2007-06-04 [Fearathress]: o.o i ish back...
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You wash gone?
2007-06-04 [Fearathress]: Ja
2007-06-04 [sunabozu]: JA MON!
2007-06-04 [Fearathress]: lol
2007-06-04 [Lethan]: indeed.
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: This conversation is inspiring... *eats ramen*...
2007-06-04 [Lethan]: I come here for the atmoshere. well, that and the food. the only difference is, i dont see the atmoshere going the other way later on...
2007-06-04 [Fearathress]: o.o
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: The "atmosphere" is toxic at the moment... a cow just blew up in the back...
2007-06-04 [Fearathress]: Sounds like dinner for me. :P
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Smells like last years dinner to me...
2007-06-04 [Lethan]: dibs on the udders.
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats a goat instead*
2007-06-04 [Pillowthief]: *Screams in Afganistanian* MY GOAT!


*Points at running cactaur brand on the drumstick Mort is currently chewing on*
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: It burns! *spits out the tainted goat meat*
2007-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Glad that's over... now where was I...? ...*picks up a piece of goat and starts chewing it*...
2007-06-04 [Lethan]: *scrapes up some stuff on the floor and eats it*


*chew* *chew* *crunch* *spits out tooth* *chew*...
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]:

2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles penguin- hello. -walks over to the bar-
2007-06-05 [Lethan]: hmm, you often get random huggles, mort?
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: only from me...you can get huggles too if you're nice to me
2007-06-05 [Lethan]: is it worth all the trouble, though?
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: most likely not, but hey -shrugs- if you want to get a huggle every time I get on, then be nice to me.
2007-06-05 [Pillowthief]: ...
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pillow- You're not always nice to be, but i like you anways!
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*... Any of you dingleberries seen any good movies lately?
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: the new "Pans Laberinth" was really good. It's cool if you like really violent movies...
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That's more of a Nok kind of movie...
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sticks tongue out- I liked it
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...go watch Hostile...
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: fine! -puts in "hostile"- happy?
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: No... now I'm depressed...
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That's right... click it...
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Why are you depressed?
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: 'Cause I was pickin' on this nerd earlier, but then I accidently pushed him off a bridge... and now there's nobody to do my homework for me...
2007-06-05 [Eloura]: *walks in* hiya all!
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...you're either trying to be funny...or need a little help with your brain...^__^
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm top in my class... I can do the work myself... it's just that I don't feel like it... *makes someone more nerdy than me do some more homework*...
2007-06-05 [Eloura]: *eats ramen*
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...there's asbestos in that ramen...
2007-06-05 [Eloura]: Ehh don't care.
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -eats ramen-
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*also eats ramen*... the asbestos gives it a kick!
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: don't forget the rabies, everything taste better with rabies, YAAA RABIES!!
2007-06-05 [Fearathress]: o.o
2007-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid Cosmo... *eats http://elftown.lysator.liu.se/img/photo/104216_1103737530.jpg *...
2007-06-05 [Lethan]: *crunch*
2007-06-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: lol, see you like rabies too don't you?
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Scooby-Doo had rabies one time on the set... tragically though, when he said "I have rabies", they thought he meant "babies" and all stepped in to congratulate him... that was a grim day... they had to carry Shaggy to the hospital in three different ambulances...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: lol, you're silly
2007-06-06 [Pillowthief]: Who's is the Bob's Surprise banner made by? (The plate that's saying Help Me, Says Tiger Shark on it)
2007-06-06 [Fearathress]: lol
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...[Tiger Shark].
2007-06-06 [Pillowthief]: Just making sure...
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Riiiiight... *eats ramen*...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I like Scooby-Doo...he's funny
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Screw Scooby... Scrappy is the only good one...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: BLASFAMY!!! You speak treason against Scooby-Doo, and all who love him. Scrappy is an evil little creature...just look at the first Scooby-Doo movie...he's evil i tell you!
2007-06-06 [Pillowthief]: Blashemy indeed. Fuck, I hate Scrappy.
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles thief- Way to go, someone has seen the light!
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: The term is blasphemy, people... that means you too, [nokaredes]!!
2007-06-06 [Pillowthief]: He spoke clear english, which sounded vulgar and childish and made Scooby sound retarded as he just makes human-like sounds. "Rughn?" "Rugh-uh" "Riiipe!"
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Yeah I know! I also hate how he's always getting poor Scoobs and Shaggy into trouble because he thinks he's "So strong" Scarppy's a wimp, Scooby kicks ass!
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Let's not forget his later years... when he got hooked on Brazillian Cocaine...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -pokes penguin- hey, i thought you liked Scrappy...why are you bashing him now? MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!!
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Bill the Cat got hooked on Cocaine... and died a couple of times... but he's still cool.
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -rolls eyes- i'll never understand how your brain works
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: There... now this is a "Bill the Cat" memorial wiki...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Cute Pen...very cute ^__^ -huggles-
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I bet Luke never had to deal with this... *scratches self with light saber*...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *mrrows as walking in and find ramen and eats it*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -flintchs- wouldn't that hurt...
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps... *continues scratching*...


There's a ramen shack down the road... It's where I buy my ramen... (this place is too expensive, you know)
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: so go buy your ramen from there, instead of here
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: (ehhh but it has better ramen)
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *orders a freakin' pizza*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -gasps- you're eating something over than ramen!!1
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *dies* No way
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats pizza*... you know what this pizza needs...? ...A little ramen... *pours ramen on the pizza*...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *starts breathing* I was gonna say.
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- I knew it couldn't last!
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *sits in leather chair drinking a pint of blood and eating more ramen* You had me worried there.
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...leather...? ...LEATHER?! ...Bessie, nooo!
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: what? I love my leather jacket...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: Yes leather
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats beef ramen*...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: MRrrrrow *giggles and say's* Not real leather..
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Cheapo... *wears a big, thick, black leather jacker*... took 12 cows to make this thing... but it was aaaall worth it... *eats ramen*... man, this thing is hot... *throws the jacket in the garbage can*...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -rushes to retreave the jacket- how could you! -cuddles jacket- good leather
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a bunch of garbage goo stuck to that thing...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: Only reason i'm in it is cause there repairing my chair..... *is wearing her own comphy leather jacket* Mrrrow
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -cleans jacket and cuddles-
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a whole cow at you*
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: mrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooooooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *sprays water at you*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *...murky water!*
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *runs scrabling away to "higher ground" = your head*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- you guys are soo odd
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...get it off! *sticks head in the over*
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *dries off that way feeling all toasty warm*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: You two should totally hook up -falls over laughing-
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: i don't think so. I'm taken *curls up and falls asleep*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: And remember kids... when your cat is wet, don't dry him off using the following methods:


-Twist dry
-Hang him out to dry
-Microwave
-Dryer
-Over an open fire


And don't shake it dry either...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...blow drying a cat is a lot of fun...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *mrows in agreement* Mrrr! *sleeps on*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Also... don't light your cats on fire... without proper adult supervision, of course (you gotta have somebody to record)...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: or to clean up the dead body afterward...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *raises kitty eyebrow waking up* Especialy kitten's.... they go faster.
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Heh... heh heh... Bush made Russia mad...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: and have sharper teeth
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *nods head8 Yeps *goes back to sleep on penguin's head*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the seagulls arrive on my head for their nightly snack*
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *seagulls leave when one of there own die*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: you two really do need to get hooked up, -grabs a pair of rings- you complete each other!
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the owls arrive to feed on the seagulls*...
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: But i'm taken. *pokes sis and say's* Hey why not you Snow?
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'm sorry ma'am, but I'm married to my work. .........*eats ramen*.
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *seagulls leave as do the owls as now many die for disturbing me*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- yeah right, I can't go three senstance without getting into a fight with pen. Besides, I hate him. ^__^
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the buzzards arrive to pick at the dead owls/seagulls*
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *the buzzards die* Someone else other than me *curls back asleep on penguins head*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the eagles arrive to munch on the owl/seagull/buzzard remains*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -goes over and eats all the dead birds- yummy
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *is glad for snows help so she sends the eagles away going back to sleep again*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the condors chase Whitey for eating their prey*
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *purrs in sleep*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -eats condors-
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pterodactyls, enraged, swoop in the attack White*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -swats at pterodactyls, knocking them into a wall-
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mothra arrives to eat the pteradactyls*
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah yes... the circle of life is complete.
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: good, can you stop that bird thing now?
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *purrs on Pen's head sleeping so soundly*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I thought I was the only one that called Penguin pen....
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *snores and mummbles* To tired to write much more...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles eloura- go to bed sleepy head! -tucks her into the couch in the corner-
2007-06-06 [Eloura]: *curls up with giant pillow and blanket* Night night Snow *she say's useing the nickname she used to call white* Sleepy heads on;y sleep in!
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: well, you still have to sleep, so sleep now and go sleep in also -nuzzles-
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *lights stuff on fire*
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -puts fires out with old rugs-
2007-06-06 [nokaredes]: I do like Pan's Labyrinth! :O *listens to the soundtrack* Wait, I only like numbers 4 and 21, why am I listening to this? *changes it to the Pirates of the Carbbean soundtrack*
2007-06-06 [nokaredes]: And I know what blasphemy is already...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...I've chaged my mind, Nok and Pen should marry -laughs insainly-
2007-06-06 [nokaredes]: What?!
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ROFL, you complete each other MUAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
2007-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*lights Whitey on fire*...
2007-06-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -puts out fire- come on, admit it!
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *giggles* Yay Snow! Let them marry!
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: Please no, think about their children... Im a sick individual, but just the thought disturbs me... *sob*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: You have a point, but better Nok than me.
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: ...i am honestly lost for words about this situation.
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *thinks* I have an idea *pulls out a lost confused person who wants to marry* Here we are!
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll pretend I didn't hear any of this... *eats ramen*...
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: pulls him out of where...?
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: Ohhh i have this weird pocket yea, i can hide people in there. You can pretend but you know you wanna *the person runs up*
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: hmm, interesting. how do i go about geting one of these pockets? *is making an evil plot*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: Sadly this is a special gift from my grandmother. There are many pockets like that just depends on the size of the pocket. *is wearing a big cloak* Yes, you can hide whole army's in one pocket! I'd have to find out what your plot is first before i can try to get you one.
2007-06-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -blinks at the conversation between eloura and leth- oookkkaaayyy...i'm scared of YOU guys....
2007-06-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen and eloura-
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: *grins like a necrophilac in a morgue*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: But snow... You know about this cloak.... *pouts insulted*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *huggles snow* Now now Leth
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: i plan to corner the swiss cheese market, so i can raise the prices to ludicrous levels! thus, making swiss cheese an upper-class foodstuff.
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats cheddar*...
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: buy my cheese, damn you!
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats Monterey Jack*...
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: *peddles his wares*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *eats peporoni cheese* Never! You haven't the cloak to win yet. But i'm not to worried. I'm not a swiss fan
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: Curses! foiled again! *puts on top hat and monocale, and runs away*
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*pedals his bike*... oh god! The freeway! NOOHOOHOHOOOO!!!
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: you alright, old chap?
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *is dead*... *leaves all my ramen/ramen associated items to Pillowthief*... *leaves bacon bits for Nok*... *leaves acid for Whitey*... *leaves my meds to Leth*... *leaves my debts to Eloura*...
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *sits down pulls out a bowl of ramen and chop sticks*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *eloura burns debts*
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: whoo! meds! *pillages his corpse for extra things* ooh, a lobster! *walks away satisfied*
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: *Trades ramen for bacon bits*
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: *Phones in collection agencies to go after [Eloura], cops to go after [Lethan], to honor Mort's death. He would want it this way*
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: *leaves White alone... I think damage has been, or will be done*
2007-06-07 [Eloura]: *hides from collection agency peoples and giggles*
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: *is running like hell*
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: *waves lobster angryly at the cops and shouts* you'll never catch me!
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: *Cops and collection agencies bump into each other and get confused with who their looking for! Eloura get +2 to stealth and Lethandros get +2 to debt reduction*
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: how are either of those going to make me run faster!?!? *waves the lobster some more*
2007-06-07 [Lethan]: *lobster claws his eye* AAhhhhhh *runs faster*
2007-06-07 [nokaredes]: ...I like my bacon bits. And Pillowthief, you are a geek. (Or am I the geek, for recognizing the reference? O_o)
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: Bwahaha!
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heh... PT cruiser...
2007-06-07 [nokaredes]: *listens to bagpipe music*
2007-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Oh Danny Booooy, the pipes, the pipes, are calliiiing!
2007-06-07 [Pillowthief]: Danny can't hear, those are mourning pipes...
2007-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid deaf Danny...
2007-06-08 [Eloura]: mrrr????
2007-06-08 [Pillowthief]: Poor deaf, dumb and dead Danny...
2007-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn... dat der is a lot of d's...
2007-06-08 [Eloura]: Cha
2007-06-08 [Lethan]: indeed.
2007-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks up to [Mortified Penguin]*Look dude,I'm sorry for the meltdown in prep haters,and everywhere else that I insulted you at,I promise that I won't insult you as long as you don't insult me,or make my friends angry,or annoy me or my friends anymore.*smiles,hugs him,and walks away to the corner and prays he doesn't send the chickens,or lions,or any other animal after me*
2007-06-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -blinks in surprise at Misty- You've got to be kidding me. Something is SAYING SORRY to Pen. -falls over laughing-
2007-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: What??I am sorry,and I think he should say sorry too,but he probaly(sp?) won't.
2007-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *picks nose with a screwdriver*
2007-06-09 [Eloura]: *walks in and is confused*
2007-06-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen- you're a dork
2007-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *hiss*
2007-06-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles again- Just get use to it Pen
2007-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiight... *eats ramen*...
2007-06-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grins and sits at the bar-
2007-06-09 [Lethan]: *gnaws on a chair*
2007-06-10 [Eloura]: *giggles joyfully* Guess what?!?!?!?!?!?!!!!!
2007-06-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: what?
2007-06-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -sniffles- you left me again eloura!!
2007-06-10 [Eloura]: I'm back again Snow!!!! *giggles* I have a boyfriend i have a boyfriend
2007-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmm...
2007-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...so does [nokaredes]! ...not really though... (she can't get one)...
2007-06-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ....I want a name, address and social secrety number lol just kidding. But this guy treats you right or else I will find him. ^.^ I know people who know people
2007-06-10 [Eloura]: I will tell you a first name. His name is Jared. And i have a feeling he will treat me right. He's a true gentalman. (well so far)
2007-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmm...
2007-06-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles- Just letting you know. I find out he's been harmful emotional or physically to you in any way, he's gonna get to see all 50 states...at the same time.
2007-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Jared...? ...he sounds fat...
2007-06-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -pokes pen- You're just mad cause she's got a boyfriend and it's not you -falls over laughing-
2007-06-10 [Eloura]: *huggles back* I'll make sure to let ya know. Sad thing is how are you getting to PA? (no jared is not fat)
2007-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hey... if I wanted a boyfriend, I could get one... I just don't like boys is all.
2007-06-10 [Eloura]: Mortified i truly do believe you can get a boyfriend if you want one. I believe in you.
2007-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Instead of discussing whether or not I can get a boyfriend... I believe I'll just eat some ramen... *eats ramen*... *touches boobies*...
2007-06-10 [Eloura]: *is glad is already in another room fixing ramen*
2007-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm...who's boobs are you touching,I know they aren't mine cause I'm in the corner and you aren't,and I really hope you don't have boobs.
2007-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'm touching quality boobs.
2007-06-10 [nokaredes]: Why do you feel the need to mention me by name when I'm not even here? And who says I can't get a boyfriend?!
2007-06-10 [Pillowthief]: Hmm? Are Mort and Nok dating now?
2007-06-10 [nokaredes]: Ick. No.
2007-06-10 [Pillowthief]: *Wipes sweat from my brow*
2007-06-11 [Lethan]: well, if you're REALLY desperate, ill be your boyfriend...*looks hopeful*
*also, has hit a new low*
2007-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ha ha... Nok can't get a boyfriend...
2007-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: You people need to get informed on an important subject:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7LAZgcC3jgo
2007-06-11 [Lethan]: ...*slaps mort* thanks for wasting two minuties of my life that i'll never get back!
2007-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you're welcome! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: I don't even want a boyfriend...
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OPLSomDfmqQ
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: I dont want a boyfriend either. They suck.
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *eats ramen with chop sticks*
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: *Moves out of the 'line of sight' between Elora and Mort*
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *pokes with chop sticks*
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: ......
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: *Also moves out of reach from Elora's chopsticks*
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *giggles and goes back to eating her ramen* I promise i won't poke you again!!! *grins evily*
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: *Waits for calamity*
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: I have to move on 9 July and that Monday is the only day I can move and none of my friends will help me T_T
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: Who wants to come to Maryland?!
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *sets place on fire and claims a cat knocked a candle over* Much better *sits as flames engulf everything*
2007-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Maryland? That place founded by George Calvert, better known as Lord Baltimore, as a haven for Catholics? Also, the main crop that was grow back when it was founded was tobacco? ...I think not.
2007-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *kills Eloura for eating ramen*
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: I wanna go
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: (You cant go, you are dead. I wisely moved out of the way as I knew what was coming. *hahaha, evil laugh, Im so smart*)
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *wonders why she died for eating ramen so sit's up* I'm like a cat i have 9 lives.
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: *Kills Elora for no reason other than to tell her that she now has 7...*
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *yawns* Yet i can get more lives than 9
2007-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons eloura*... *accidently harpoons pillow somehow too*...
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *now has 6 lives so goes and steals lives from wild cats gives abbility to pillow theif also*
2007-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*... *sets you on fire*... ah, fire... the gift that keeps on killing...
2007-06-12 [Pillowthief]: *still emotionally recovering from "accidental" harpooning*
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: But i like fire! *lives on*
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: *is apparently being completely ignored*
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *sets nok's on fire* We would never ignore you!
2007-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-06-12 [Eloura]: *steals ramen*
2007-06-12 [nokaredes]: Oh, well, now I'm on fire... is this an improvement...? o_O
2007-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Slightly...
2007-06-13 [Eloura]: Maybe
2007-06-13 [Pillowthief]: Possibly.
2007-06-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps...
2007-06-13 [Pillowthief]: Could be...
2007-06-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Quite.
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: just maybe possibility
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: o.O
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: theheheheheh
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: okay...
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: Yea
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: How are u?
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: Sleepy, you?
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: Sleepy.
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: awww
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: I am off to bed. NIght.
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: Night sleep well
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: YOu too.
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: I did!!!
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: Well at least one of us did
2007-06-14 [Eloura]: Awww why didn't you?
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: I went to bed at midnight, @ 1 a animal was trying to break in and so i freaked out didnt go to bed till 2 then woke up a 5:30
2007-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: You people have terrible conversations...
2007-06-14 [Pillowthief]: Poor Fluffy, he's soo cold outside...
2007-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: That'll teach him to be fluffy...
2007-06-14 [Pillowthief]: And poor I suppose.
"Get a job!"
2007-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn bums...
2007-06-14 [Pillowthief]: ...And furry animals.
2007-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Same difference...
2007-06-14 [Fearathress]: Okay then...
2007-06-14 [Pillowthief]: Some bums wear furry animals...
2007-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Only rats... rich people wear foxes.
2007-06-15 [Eloura]: *nods head*
2007-06-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2007-06-15 [Pillowthief]: There. I've decided. If I become a bum, I will have to wear Misty1. Now its all up to you to decide if Im a rich one or a poor one....
2007-06-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF?!*runs*
2007-06-15 [Pillowthief]: Dont worry, I'll warn you before I become a bum.
2007-06-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hides behind Eloura*Don't let him get me.
2007-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Poor people have more style, man...
2007-06-15 [Pillowthief]: I could take Sharpies to her, and I have some colored Duct tape. That will have to do.
2007-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...really now? What color?
2007-06-15 [Pillowthief]: Oh, yellow and blue. She would look good in yellow and blue. And Sharpie.
2007-06-15 [nokaredes]: ...or glow in the dark paint...
2007-06-15 [sunabozu]: do my poll plz i will reward you
2007-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I did yo' poll... now where's my reward?!!
2007-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hides behind [sunabozu]*They want to color me with sharpies and put colored duct tape on me then wear me,help.
2007-06-17 [Lethan]: looks like i got here just in time, then!...colour, tape and wear ME! not her! i'll look more stylish!
2007-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh... so you don't want to be "colored", huh Misty? ...racist!
2007-06-18 [nokaredes]: I just got my first bike today! :D I have two things to say about it: bikes are not as easy to ride as they look, and, ow.
2007-06-18 [sunabozu]: be nice,oh cool new bike
2007-06-18 [Pillowthief]: *weighs his choices* Lethandros.....or Misty1....


Hmmmmmmm........
2007-06-18 [nokaredes]: *wonders if this involves actual weighing*
2007-06-18 [Pillowthief]: I have a very small scale, so I need a very small part of each of them...


*takes out big knife*


This may hurt a little.
2007-06-19 [Eloura]: TAKE ME TAKE ME!!!!!!!!
2007-06-19 [Pillowthief]: Im not weighing you right now. Here, take a number.


*rips off ticket from the dipenser and hands it to Elora*
2007-06-19 [nokaredes]: ...you might want to be a little more careful about yelling that around here...
2007-06-19 [Pillowthief]: You want a number too?
2007-06-19 [Eloura]: *takes the number and ask's nok* Whatcha mean???
2007-06-19 [nokaredes]: ..."take me"? When Mortimer gets back from vacation, he'll take you somewhere bad... and no, [Pillowthief], I do not want a number...
2007-06-19 [Pillowthief]: *meh*
2007-06-20 [Eloura]: *hides* Umm no thanks...
2007-06-20 [Lethan]: *looks at his ticket* um...why does mine have ALL the numbers on it?
2007-06-20 [Pillowthief]: What's that?
*looks at ticket*


Hmm. Looks like its your turn then. *chops off hand*
Oops, too big, here's a couple fingers back. Dont know what you would do with them 'cause Im keeping the hand! Bwahaha!
2007-06-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...if this place gets any weirder I might have to shut it down...
2007-06-20 [Pillowthief]: *Weighs [Lethan]*
Hmph. I still need a piece of Misty1 to weigh my results against. I'll keep this on ice untill then. Where'd she go anyway?


Sure you dont want a number Nok? Looks like Leth cant hold onto his anymore.
2007-06-20 [Eloura]: *wonders why her ticket say's 666*
2007-06-20 [Pillowthief]: Wha- uh, I dont think that's my ticket...


*Hellfire flares* Oh hello Juan.
2007-06-20 [Eloura]: *hides behind pillow and puts ticket in your pocket*
2007-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Juan...? ...JUAN?! ...Florida has computers too you know... *eats ramen... in Florida!*
2007-06-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen- Who's Juan?
2007-06-20 [Pillowthief]: Baal Davar's nephew. He kicks it with me and Jesus from time to time.
2007-06-23 [Lethan]: i could use a hand here. get it? HAND...whee, blood loss doesnt half make you feel light-headed...
2007-06-23 [Eloura]: *gives you a hand*
2007-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: I live in Florida,go here and be honest,I need to know,am I ugly or pretty?,*thinks*wait,unless you don't want to hurt my feelings,lie.
2007-06-23 [Eloura]: z*shrugs* I don't know
2007-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: go to the wiki
2007-06-23 [Eloura]: Umm ok
2007-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2007-06-23 [Eloura]: Done!
2007-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,if anyone has seen,or sees Turkey tell him it is boring here without him,and I'm sorry for reporting him.
2007-06-23 [Eloura]: Ummm ok
2007-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2007-06-23 [Eloura]: k
2007-06-23 [Lethan]: *eats hand*
2007-06-23 [nokaredes]: What'd you report Turkey for...? Besides, Turkey and Mortimer are (supposedly) on vacation, so they might not be on for a while... especially if they, I dunno, get caught trying to get on an airplane with drugs or shampoo or something...
2007-06-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol he was stalking me,that's why.He kept commenting weird annoying rude things on my wiki,when I asked him nicely to stop.
2007-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Airplane?! ...*****, we rode a mother ******* van! ...then I ate some gator... and bought a gator head... and a shark in a jar...
2007-06-24 [nokaredes]: Dead shark?!
2007-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws it at you*
2007-06-24 [Pillowthief]: ...Wow. I hate weekends- I always seem to miss the interesting conversations.
2007-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: The weekends hate you too... in fact they started an anti-Pillowthief club... they hold their meetings in a mansion with an open bar and a buffet... hmm... that actually sounds pretty sweet... *joins the club*... death to Pillowthief!
2007-06-25 [Pillowthief]: Drat! I must start my own anti-anti-Pillowthief club. Yes. And there will be cake, crumpets and tah (which is kinda like tea, but not).
2007-06-25 [Eloura]: I wanna join!
2007-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... cake...
2007-06-25 [nokaredes]: Living sharks are better than dead ones...
2007-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: And much tastier...
2007-06-25 [Eloura]: true!
2007-06-25 [Lethan]: ah, a nice bit of crumpet, indeed...
2007-06-26 [Pillowthief]: I get cake today! Hurrah!
2007-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm?!
2007-06-26 [Pillowthief]: I like cake.
2007-06-26 [Lethan]: hooray! is it any good?
2007-06-26 [Pillowthief]: I havent eaten it yet... It looks good. :(
2007-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it'd better be a cheesecake...
2007-06-26 [Pillowthief]: Ugh, two different types of cake- one was too rich and the other had donut cream inside... Wish I had some cheesecake...
2007-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...cheddar cheesecake...
2007-06-26 [Pillowthief]: Rum cheese-*hic*-cake....
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Rum is for pirates... drink some Tequila!
2007-06-27 [Eloura]: *drinks both* Yum *hic*
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: Yarr!
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: (Is the Wesley joke still old?)
2007-06-27 [Eloura]: RAWR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GARGH!!!!
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: I think that was supposed to be a Grawrl...
2007-06-27 [Eloura]: No. Gargh it twas!!! (what wesley joke?)
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: (haha, I get to use it again!)
*Is Dread Pirate Roberts!*
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *starts up an anti-wesley cult*...
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: *Duals Gargh to the death*
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: *Visits anti-wesley cult incognito, eats good cake*
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Sir, may I see your ticket?
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UMlPVpXtkJY
2007-06-27 [Pillowthief]: Cake...or Death.
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... death...
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I have I touching story to tell you all...




This man was getting married soon and there was one major problem... his future wife's sister. She was gorgeous!


So, one day th sister invited him over to help with last minute wedding details. It was going to be just the two of them.


After a few minutes of talking to the sister about the wedding, the sister said, "You are going to get married soon. But, if you could just have sex with me once, I will stay out of the way."


So the sister went upstairs and flung her shirt down the stairs. The man had a choice to make: the gorgeous sister or being loyal to his wife. He quickly dashed toward the door and headed for his car.


His whole family was outside! With tears in his eyes his father-in-law said, "Thank you. I now know you are right for my daughter. Thank you for being loyal."


MORAL OF THE STORY: Always keep your condoms in the car.
2007-06-27 [Lethan]: but i dont even have a car....so where will i keep my condoms!?
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wear them at all times.
2007-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: There... a proper tribute to Qui-Gon...
2007-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2007-06-29 [Lethan]: why, hello there!
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...stop yelling at me!! ...*runs away sobbing*... *hides in a closet*... finally... it's safe to eat some ramen... *eats ramen*...
2007-06-29 [nokaredes]: Mortimer... you should come out of the closet... because... it's dark there... and stuff...
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...waaiit a second... Bob's Diner doesn't have closets...
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *is eaten by the giant venus-closet-trap*
2007-06-29 [Eloura]: *laughs and eats ramen*
2007-06-29 [Lethan]: how did ithat venus-closet trap get in here anyway....?
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I just bought the new Maroon 5 CD. It's freakin' awesome, man... *eats ramen*...
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I probably bought it a little too late, though...


"Makes Me Wonder" is probably the best song on there...


...*eats ramen*...
2007-06-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen-
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *sheds his skin to escape*
2007-06-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen, again-
2007-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *bleeds on you*
2007-06-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -patchs up the bleeding part on pen and wipes up blood- You'r such a dork.
2007-06-30 [Lethan]: *eats shedded skin*.....
2007-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...That'll cost you $19.95!
2007-06-30 [Lethan]: *hands the money over*....totally worth it...*chews*
2007-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *buys new skin at the dollar store*... all right! ...now I'm black! ...*gets shot by cops*...
2007-06-30 [Lethan]: oooh, free corpse food.
2007-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...My corpse'll cost you $15.59!
2007-06-30 [Lethan]: eh, totally not worth it. *walks away*.....
2007-06-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs, handing 15.59 on the counter- I can I eat your corpse now?
2007-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I meant five installments of $15.59...
2007-06-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: You just don't want me to eat your corpse, scary cat!
2007-06-30 [Lethan]: intallments....monthly, or weekly?
2007-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...daily.
2007-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: You know, our conversations have been getting quite disturbing. Eating corpses... hints at necrophilia... What is this diner coming to?...*eats ramen in the corner*...*huddles into the fetal position and rocks back and forth while thinking about the disturbingness of it all*...


Oh, well... I'm over it!


By the way, the first song on the Maroon 5 CD is actually the best... *eats leftover ramen from last night's massive "party" (I'll let the viewers decide why the quotation marks are around the word PARTY [..if you're really that obsessed, you can start a poll to decide what it means, whether it be a perverted subject or just another birthday party])*...


Sorry, just another literary rampage...
2007-07-01 [Eloura]: *eats ramen on a window ledge safly hidden behind a curtain*
2007-07-01 [Lethan]: got anymore shedded skin yet? i've got the munchies.
2007-07-01 [nokaredes]: ...stop smoking weed, you cannibal...
2007-07-01 [Pillowthief]: *Decides to just chew on the news-papered-breakfast-sandwich as fully eating him seems too expensive for poor-skinny-white-boys*
2007-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Chewing costs $9.95... but through this weekend, hot chicks can chew for free!
2007-07-01 [Pillowthief]: I look pretty hot in drag, does that count? *chew* *chew*
2007-07-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen- You know, I think that a few comments above is the most i've ever seen you write before Pen.
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... I'll give you half off if you never go in drag again...
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...most you've ever seen me write?!!
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Madame, might I refer you to a comment of mine made on 2007-04-05? The comment itself can be read on the 48th comment page. More importantly though, I would like to direct your attention to a comment of mine from 2007-04-15. Which can be read on comment page 43... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-02 [Pillowthief]: *chew*
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: My Eastern hemisphere is much tastier...
2007-07-02 [Pillowthief]: *distrusts birds that cant fly*
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...chickens...? ...turkeys...? ...condors with their wings broken off...?!
2007-07-02 [Eloura]: *whistles and drinks yummy blood*
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: As we know,
There are known knowns.
There are things we know we know.
We also know
There are known unknowns.
That is to say
We know there are some things
We do not know.
But there are also unknown unknowns,
The ones we don't know
We don't know.
2007-07-02 [Eloura]: um ok
2007-07-02 [Lethan]: I'm sure ive heard that before....it sounds too smart to be something you could make up...hmm...
2007-07-02 [Pillowthief]: Who was that... Ah, Donald Rumpsfelt- our National Security Advisor (or whatever). Proves how big of stupid idiot asses the US can be. God, I hate this country.
2007-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: That's right! Show your patriotism- wait... what?
2007-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Furthermore, I've a test to take!!!!!!


...*eats soggy rice crispies...and ramen*...
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: *eats homemade chicken dish and sells it in here if allowed*
2007-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Is it just chicken? Or posibly a dish made out of chicken? We dont have one of those.
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: A dish made out of chicken! You want one?
2007-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Add it to 'da menu!
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: remind me when i come back on at another time Please.
2007-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Bah! *Turns up lame*
2007-07-03 [Lethan]: dish made out of checken saves up washing up...hold on a minute! does anyone actually do that around here!?
2007-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You know... there are seperate pictures for the specials... one for every day! ...but I'm too lazy to change 'em...
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: lol ok
2007-07-03 [nokaredes]: *turns up dead*
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: *swears she didn't kill nok*
2007-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *sands off fingerprints*
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: *waits foer verdict*
2007-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...perhaps this is an occasion for the long lost the courts of elftown? ...of course we'd first need a suspect... uh... how about Pillowthief!
2007-07-03 [Eloura]: *nods head* Yes pillowthief.
2007-07-04 [nokaredes]: I like how there was a "verdict" mentioned, but apparently no "autopsy" or "investigation"...
2007-07-04 [Pillowthief]: *shush, Im hiding and you're dead*
2007-07-04 [Eloura]: *giggles* Hmmm *pokes Nok* Yep dead!
2007-07-04 [Pillowthief]: *hands Elora a stick to poke Nok*
*Realizes he has given away his position in the tree and relocates*
2007-07-04 [Eloura]: *follows with stick as you relocate* WE GOT A RUNNER!!!
2007-07-04 [Pillowthief]: *grabs stick back*
"Ungrateful son-of-a-"
2007-07-04 [Eloura]: *laughs takes stick back and point to nok* We GOT A RUNNER *meaning little imps are stealing Nok away* *whispers to Pillow* No worries i'm not giving your hidding spot away yet. I just wanna be safe.
2007-07-04 [Lethan]: *is still in hiding* strange they i didt notice the words '[Lethan] did it' in blood on the wall yet....*eats blood....oranges!*
2007-07-05 [nokaredes]: Happy Fourth of July, America(ns)! (And remember, high taxes are a good reason to shoot people with muskets.)
2007-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shoot nokaredes with a musket*... darn zombies!
2007-07-05 [Lethan]: you dont need a reason to shoot anyone with a musket!
2007-07-05 [Pillowthief]: You dont shoot people with a musket! You shoot people who have muskets! *Points uzi at Mort turning him info deliciously looking swiss cheese*
2007-07-05 [Lethan]: how did you two get hold of guns anyway!?
2007-07-05 [Pillowthief]: Ebay.
2007-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Duh.
2007-07-05 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen, sitting down on couch-
2007-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: .......what couch?!
2007-07-06 [Pillowthief]: Ebay.
2007-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...shouldn't that be eBay...?
2007-07-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Half.com sillys
2007-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...or maybe I'm just thinking of eColi...
2007-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...or maybe it was eBola... yeah... that's what I was thinking of.
2007-07-06 [Eloura]: *pulls out shot gun adn say's* Where's the mummy where's the mummy?!?!?! O.o
2007-07-06 [nokaredes]: How did you turn Mortimer into swiss cheese (haha, I'm allergic to you now) by just pointing an uzi at him? And there is no mummy here!
2007-07-06 [Lethan]: *is covered in bandages for some reason* yep, no mummy here.
2007-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Allergic, eh...? *attacks nokaredes, paying no attention to the mummy in the corner*
2007-07-06 [Lethan]: *saves nokaredes by eating mort*
2007-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: But... I'm tainted!
2007-07-07 [Eloura]: *attacks the mummy*
2007-07-07 [Lethan]: *hiss*
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: Yo, yo, wassup ho's?!!
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: S'up, n'igga'?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Tell yo ugly sista' I said happy burfday...
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: A'ight... and tell yo' ugly mom I still owe her fi'ty cents.
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: But... my mom's been dead for fourty years!
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: I thought she was a little stiff... oh well...
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sicko... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: Ho! ...where's my copy of Moron 5's CD?!
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I never said I'd make you a copy! ...and "turkey"...? ...that's real original...
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: You'd better! Or I'll, as Dillon says, slap you silly! ...it's more original than yours... splinter cell!
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh **** no! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: ...stupid dinglehoppers... Imma go work on that homiework now...
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, fine, go... go sleep with your lover David...
2007-07-07 [Turkеу]: Stupid David... claims he won some wrestling crap... also, he's apparently taking AP English next year...
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...he'll probably drop out at the beggining of the year...
2007-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Holy crap!! Somebody just bombed a Live Earth concert!!
...*eats ramen and expects a hesitant reaction from the audience*...
2007-07-08 [Eloura]: *eats ramen of a new kind*
2007-07-08 [nokaredes]: I'm thinking of joining the Marines. What do the denizens of B's D have to say about that?!
2007-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Go for it!
2007-07-08 [nokaredes]: ...your opinion doesn't count until you answer my last private message to you.
2007-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you sent me a message?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-08 [nokaredes]: Yup.
2007-07-08 [Lethan]: where does all that ramen come from anyway!? its like you have an unlimited supply...
2007-07-08 [nokaredes]: ...it fell off a truck.
2007-07-08 [Pillowthief]: Mort probably works for UPS, they lose enough crap its ridiculous. (Tmobile should go back to Fedex, it was better that way)
2007-07-08 [Pillowthief]: (Was that Bad Turkey? I though he was banned?)
2007-07-08 [nokaredes]: He makes new accounts all the time. They tried to ban his IP but then he just uses proxies, so they can only ban individual accounts now...
2007-07-08 [Pillowthief]: Heh, stick it to the man you feather-coated-lunch-time-snack.
2007-07-08 [Lethan]: *falls off a truck*
2007-07-08 [Pillowthief]: *#%^ing UPS. Take it back! *shakes fist*
2007-07-08 [Lethan]: ....*hops back on the truck*
2007-07-08 [Pillowthief]: *shakes fist again* That's right!
2007-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *a FedEx truck falls off a UPS truck... causing much devestation and ruining many lives...*
2007-07-08 [Pillowthief]: Damn you UPS!!!!
2007-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *shakes fist at the sky*... *the sky shakes back*... *hides under a rock*
2007-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*watches Kung Fu Hustle*...
2007-07-09 [Eloura]: *laughs as rock shakes away*
2007-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused


Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused


I wanna use you and abuse you
I wanna know what's inside you
(Whispering) Hold your head up, movin' on
Keep your head up, movin' on
Hold your head up, movin' on
Keep your head up, movin' on
Hold your head up, movin' on
Keep your head up, movin' on
Movin' on!


Sweet dreams are made of this
Who am I to disagree?
Travel the world and the seven seas
Everybody's looking for something
Some of them want to use you
Some of them want to get used by you
Some of them want to abuse you
Some of them want to be abused


I'm gonna use you and abuse you
I'm gonna know what's inside
Gonna use you and abuse you
I'm gonna know what's inside you
2007-07-09 [Lethan]: grah! now the damn tune is in my head! must cleanse thoughts....with bleach! and fire!
2007-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... bleach...
2007-07-09 [Lethan]: yes. mmm indeed.
2007-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: But, of course.
2007-07-09 [Lethan]: *drinks bleach* ah, hits the spot every time.
2007-07-09 [Pillowthief]: ................................


Did Misty just quote a whole song by Cher?
*Agrees with Mort, takes shots of flaming bleach*
2007-07-09 [Lethan]: mmm..*drinks more bleach, and places an order for a new digestive system* probably....but i must ask...why!?
2007-07-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...mmm...fire... -snicker-
2007-07-09 [Lethan]: *lights bleach on fire*
2007-07-10 [Eloura]: *watches*
2007-07-11 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ohh!! -grabs marshmellows and chocolate-
2007-07-11 [Pillowthief]: Why the bleach, or why the Cher?
2007-07-11 [weasel2]: i didnt do it mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
2007-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Actually Marilyn Manson sang Sweet Dreams
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: No no, sad child... Marilyn Manson sang a cover of that song, the original was done by Cher. I would rather drink bleach than here it again.
2007-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've never heard her sing it,I should know my parents have all of her songs.
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: *glug glug*
2007-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *huggles*
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: *Is dead*
2007-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kisses your dead body's lips*
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: *Is dead x2*
2007-07-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Licks your cheek,and kisses your lips again*
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: *Is dead x3*
2007-07-12 [nokaredes]: Wow, Misty, wtf?
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: (She a nekro, definately) *Upon that realization PT rises from the dead, making him in realitly only half-dead or un-dead*
2007-07-12 [Lethan]: re-dead. or maybe non-alive...the possibilties are endless!
2007-07-12 [Pillowthief]: *Is re-dead*
2007-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Frickin' zombies these days... show no respect towards their elders... who would be... mummies, I think... *shrugs*... *watches Bill Cosby*... *has a sudden urge to eat Jello*...
2007-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm just going to pretend I didn't see misty licking dead people... and also that she didn't know the song was originally made by Cher...
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: Only us old re-dead people knew that, I guess.


(J.E.L.L.O.....Damn you Bill Crosby and your fake audience)
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: Random item imput: I'm now !7
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: I remember when I was !7...


Those were the good ol' days.
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: Really? Tell me tell me
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: There was this one cat, he jumped from floating platform to another, fighting something or other. Busby was his name and everyone grew to hate him and his crazy antics.
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: COOL!!
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: Not cool. The problem was that he was addicting, yet would not die. Even hitting him with anvils or falling off unimagible heights (floating platfoms dont really recognize silly things like gravity or atmosphere) would just bring up this blank screen saying "Continue?" God I hated Busby.
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: Wow.
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: Yup. That was about the time that I was !7.
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: Yep 17 rocks.
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: 17 sucked. !7 rocked.
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: 17 rocks for me. (i have better friends now O.o)
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: *Is tired of being re-dead. Becomes un-dead*
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: *Thinks about Bruce Campell coming to get me and decides to become alive again*
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: *is losted*
2007-07-13 [Pillowthief]: Google Army of Darkness. And poo on you for ignoring me making fun of your (!).
2007-07-13 [Eloura]: Okkk I made fun back (i loopy and asleep don't ask)
2007-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, yes... I remember when I was !7... it was almost like 17, but it was louder for some reason... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*writes some more Barry Cotter*...
2007-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...a thought just occured to me... I have yet to be 17... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-14 [Eloura]: *listens and eats....... Peanutbutter sandwhich*
2007-07-14 [nokaredes]: Haha, now I feel old...
2007-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Pipe down, geezer! ...just take your pills and go back to bed! ...we'll have bingo next Friday...
2007-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: "A new epidemic is raging through Springfield, and this one didn't start with Krusty burger's whatcha-McCarcus sandwich."
2007-07-15 [nokaredes]: *eats some lactosefull things and then goes to sleep at the bar*
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...lactosefull?! ...heeey... but aren't you one of those people who hate lactose based products... you lactose intolerant person, you...
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Also... I thought that bar burned down/got eaten by termites...
2007-07-15 [nokaredes]: I have medication for that now :) And someone rebuilt the bar...
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn ghost contractors...
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I too have medication... it helps with my Jew intolerance...
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Some upcoming titles by the InoHinoGo Association include:


David Hinojosa: The battle with drugs, racism, and homosexuality, Barry Cotter and the Sorcerer's Bone, Barry Cotter and the Chamber of Commerce, Barry Cotter and the Redneck of the Escape Van, Barry Cotter and the Stash is on Fire, Barry Cotter; Hooked on Phonix, Barry Cotter on the Half Black Chick, Barry Cotter and the Dead Hooker, and finally Barry Cotter and the Man in the Yellow Hat.
2007-07-15 [nokaredes]: Is that the same man from Curous George...?
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...maybe?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]:
BOB'S DINER TIMES


Bringing you pointless stuff since 7/14/07.




MAN-COW DISCOVERED IN ARIZONA DESERT





Written by [Mortified Penguin]
        Saturday, July 14, A giant "Man-cow" was discovered earlier today in a south Arizona desert. The beast was found gorging on twinkies by some passing tourists.


        "Well... I reckon I ain't never seen nothin' like that befur'!" commented local hick Cletus Bickerstaff, while hitching up his overalls.


        It's no surprise that something like this would be born with all the nuclear waste the state dumps in that area. The beast has been taken into police custody for questioning, but it has yet to say anything other than a few grunts. There are rumors of plans to take the beast to New Jersey so it can be with some of it's own kind...
2007-07-15 [Eloura]: *stares in shock* wow
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: YOU MOTHER FUCKER,THAT'S A PIC OF ME THAT YOU MESSED WITH!*chases [Mortified Penguin] with a metal baseball bat*
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it... it's just a coincidence!
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: YOU FUCKING LIAR!*hits you with the bat*
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...maybe it's actually your cousin who only looks similar to you?
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: I only have three cousins that are girls and none of them look like me,the guys don't either.*hits you again with the bat*
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... of course the cousins you know of don't look like that... but there's those secret cousins your parents haven't told you about...
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: My parents tell me everything,trust me.*shutters*
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure they tell you everything you know... but there are things they don't tell you that you don't know. If you don't know about these things, you wouldn't realize that they weren't telling you everything. So... there are, in fact, many things your parents haven't told you. Such as your mysterious, long lost cousins!
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have any long lost cousins,all of my cousins live in america.
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: America? ...such as... Arizona?! .........where your numerous cousins live... in herds, apparently...
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: My cousins live in California,Florida,Washington,and Alabama.
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, yeah... the cousins that you're aware of...


.................ALABAMA?!!
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,A homosexual it's the only one.
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... well... at least it won't multiply...


Whew... we dodged an infestation there...
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: He left his wife and two kids for another guy.
2007-07-16 [Lethan]: this is hurting my brain...
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: why?
2007-07-16 [Lethan]: im hitting it with a pick-axe, silly. why else?
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,ok
2007-07-16 [Lethan]: *continues about his business*
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-07-16 [nokaredes]: ...why are homosexuals refered to as "it" on this wiki?
2007-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Lethan],was saying he was hitting his brain.
2007-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Not all homosexuals... just the Misty related ones... are you related to Misty?!!
2007-07-16 [nokaredes]: ...not that I'm aware of...
2007-07-17 [Pillowthief]: You are right Nok,
MORT USED THE IT WORD WHEN REFERING TO A HOMOSEXUAL!!!
*points dramatically at the surprised, but not mortified, penguin*
2007-07-17 [Pillowthief]: On that note, I made you a badge. Well, me and [Tiger Shark] made you a badge.



2007-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mortified, darn you! ...I'd put that rip-off badge on the poll, but it's turkey's poll... which I can't edit... and also, there's way too many pictures on this wiki... but... oh well! *puts it on there anyway*...
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Freakin' racists...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: *wonders if the scientest's figured out where she came from yet*
2007-07-18 [Pillowthief]: No, still investigating...
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: Ahhh ok. I see. *giggles* Thoguh you'll never guess it *eat's ramen*
2007-07-18 [Pillowthief]: Ah. *eats the roasted rear end of a pig, otherwise known as bacon*
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: *stares at bacon* Yep
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I could have sworn bacon can from thin strips of horse prostate...
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: *still staring at bacon*
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Can't get enough of that horse prostate, eh?
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: No. Just thinking it would make good ramen.
2007-07-18 [Pillowthief]: Bacon ramen.... Im not too sure how that would work out. Maybe ramen with bacon?
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: Even Better!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I was making some ramen at [spitfire_35121]'s house the other day... I was putting in a whole bunch of random crap... including tuna, vegetables, a variety of spices, some bacon bits, and for some reason, almonds. If it wasn't for the superfluous oregano and the freakin' almonds, it might have been good...
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: *giggles* Good point. Sounds good though.
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid almonds...
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: Ehh stupid oregano
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah... there was some hot sauce in there too...
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: But it was a good thing...
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *meteor comes flying through the roof and kills numerous workers*
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: Ok
2007-07-18 [Pillowthief]: *[Pillowthief] noisily spews chunks all over his keyboard*
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: That'll teach 'em to unionize...
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: What made it so chunky, might I ask?
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: *plays with sword and chops off an arm off a couch*
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh ****! I have to go watch some infomercials! ...peace out, ho's!
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: ohh ok
2007-07-18 [nokaredes]: ...and that is why I'm glad I no longer work for B's D.
2007-07-18 [Eloura]: *nods head*
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't run from the B's D corporation. We'll find you. And when we do... *shakes fist*...
2007-07-18 [Pillowthief]: Pineapple, oddly enough.
2007-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeech... I hate pineapple...
2007-07-19 [Lethan]: pineapple! my nemisis...
2007-07-19 [Eloura]: *runs from B's and D*
2007-07-19 [nokaredes]: ...I just walked 3 miles.
2007-07-19 [Eloura]: *returns* ouch
2007-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Only three?! ...lazy.
2007-07-19 [Pillowthief]: I eat miles for breakfast.
2007-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and he craps kilometers.
2007-07-19 [Pillowthief]: Oh, the anticipation... of constipation...
2007-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Sounds fun... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-19 [Pillowthief]: No worrys, I eat calendars too. They have fecal systems restoration properties.
2007-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]:
        
|^^^^^^^^^^^^| ,,
|Bob's Diner   | '|""";.||.___.
|_..._...______==== _|__|..., ] |
"(@ )'(@ )""""*|(@ )(@ )*****(@)
2007-07-19 [Pillowthief]: You're bored, aren't you.
2007-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, yes... yes I am.
2007-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's me not you back from Peru.
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who let you out?!
2007-07-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I got bail.*grins*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I thought you were getting the death penalty...
2007-07-20 [Pillowthief]: See? Told you the Justice system was messed up.
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: Very
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: What a world, what a world...
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: Here Ye Here Ye an all around announcement about B's D : It rocks the socks of the world (if we don't serve it it ain't out there)
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: No, actually it shoos the shoes...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner has an average of 15.2654028436018957345971563981043 comments a day... and it's 1,055 days old... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: Cool! *steals ramen*
2007-07-20 [Pillowthief]: *eats 15.2654028436018957345971563981043 comments for breakfast*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Those comments were pretty jagged...
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: *eat's jagged ramen*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and drag Misty into the street and beat her with jagged comments*
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: *giggles*
2007-07-20 [Pillowthief]: *Doesnt eat jagged ramen for breakfast*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of chickens burst in and take a meat tenderizer to Eloura's spine*
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: Feel's good!
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *...then they detach her eyes and use them as olives in their martinis*
2007-07-20 [Eloura]: *yawns and sleep's or so she thinks.*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...So then the hooker started asking me for the money and I was all like, "What you talkin' 'bout, ho'?!". Then she was all like, "Oh no you di'n't!"... so then I started beating her with a crowbar, right? ...then this cop gets all up in my face with his, "What you beatin' that hooker for?!" and "You better stop that!"... so I took the crowbar to him, right? ...then all of a sudden, he pulls out his gun! I was like, "Oh snap! What'd I do, officer?!" ...then I made a run for it, which was kinda hard, 'cause he shot out my knee caps... long story short, I'm out of eggs and milk. I'll have to pick some up tomorrow...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I just spent the past few hours reading past pages 500-395... That's some disturbing **** right there...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: 2005-04-13 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): I hate [Sagacious Turkey]


 
2005-04-13 Sagacious Turkey: *pimp slaps you* what was that, ho?!


 
2005-04-13 Sagacious Turkey: *kicks you and starts beating you* WHAT HAVE I EVER DONE TO YOU?!


 
2005-04-13 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): I HATE [Sagacious Turkey]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


 
2005-04-13 Sagacious Turkey: *whacks misty with a metal bat* why?! I don't deserve to be hated! I've never even touched you!!! *punches you*


 




2005-04-17 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): I love [Sagacious Turkey].


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: don't we all... hey wait a second... "2005-04-13 Misty1: I hate [Sagacious Turkey]"?! make up your mind!


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: *mutters and eats a squirrel*


 
2005-04-17 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): I love [Sagacious Turkey] he grew on me.


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: *sits at a booth* hey! the service here sucks! I demand to see the manager!!!


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: Yes? you called?


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: yeah! this place stinks! screw you!


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: oh no you didn't! *pimp slaps you*


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: *gasp* it's on now!!! *jumps over the table and tackles [Sagacious Turkey]*


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: *scuffles with himself for a minute and realizes he's being stared at by everyone*


 
2005-04-17 Sagacious Turkey: *gets up and dusts himself off* well... that should help the comment number a bit... *sits back down and continues his squirrel*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: 2005-04-21 nokaredes: *stops watching this wiki...and means it this time!*
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: 2005-06-12 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): Who is [Sagacious Turkey]?I am going to follow [The Bad Turkey] around.


 
2005-06-12 Sagacious Turkey: I am the bad turkey! this is my original username... [The Bad Turkey] is a clone with my old information...


 
2005-06-12 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): Well I am going to follow you everywhere on ET.muwhahahah


 
2005-06-12 Sagacious Turkey: WHAT?!


 
2005-06-12 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): MUWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...You see?! ...you bunch of weirdos... *eats ramen*... *carves "sir soapy" on public buildings*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: In my defense, it was the drugs. ...ah, them drugs... we had some good times... as the prophet Dillon would say, *slaps Mort silly*...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid dillon... *pimp slaps you*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: Douche! Work on Barry Cotter!
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...NEVER!!!
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: ...riiiiiight... where's all them there people...?
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Check the dumpster... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: Nope... nuthin' but a Misty in there...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: So that's what's been stinkin' up the place... we should probably torch that thing... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: That thing'll pollute the atmosphere!
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: We should just dump the body like what we did with that [Paul Doyle] feller... *EATS SOME FREAKIN' RAMEN!!!*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: Nah... the FBI's on to us... we've got to dispose of it cleverly...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: We could dump it into the ocean, but it might overflow and drown us all... how about we launch it into space...? ...*chokes on ramen*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: With it's massive size it might pull Earth into it's orbit... let's just toss the thing in the dumpster...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, why not... *has his blood replaced with ramen*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: Ah, yes... another job well done...
2007-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *a massive ramen clog builds up in port 7*... *dies a gruesome death*...
2007-07-20 [Sagаcious Turkeу]: *recorded the violent death*... Sweet! I've got another video to send to America's Funniest Home Videos!
2007-07-21 [nokaredes]: I think I have pinkeye. Has anyone here ever had pinkeye?! (I better not have caught pinkeye here, or I'll make some calls to the BBB!)
2007-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: BBB?! ...Big Bouncy Boobies?!!?!
2007-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...everybody at school always claims they have pinkeye... even though it's actually always allergies... and in David's case an eye ulcer... freakin' Hinojosa... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-21 [Eloura]: *die's of ramen poisoning*
2007-07-21 [nokaredes]: *would laugh if not for Harry Potter distraction*
2007-07-21 [Eloura]: you have the harry potter book *murders*
2007-07-21 [nokaredes]: Of course I have the Harry Potter book! I was 10 in line at my work (a grocery store). I've already read up to page 45...
2007-07-21 [Eloura]: just don't tell me anything *sighs* dam it i wish i had my licencse...
2007-07-21 [Lethan]: why the rush to get it so quick? its just a book, it burns like anything else...
2007-07-21 [nokaredes]: There was no rush for me :) There wasn't much demand for Harry Potter 7 in Bethesda... (*is now at 275*)
2007-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Books burn at 451 degrees fahrenheit...
2007-07-22 [nokaredes]: ...your point?
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Fire is pretty.
2007-07-22 [nokaredes]: That's really gay of you to say.
2007-07-22 [Eloura]: I finished the book!!!! it's awesome!
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That was meant to sound deranged... but text doesn't allow that... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: .......Dumbledore dies!! ...oh wait... that was the last book...
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: .............Jimmy the retard kid dies!!! ...wait... he got killed in the fourth book...
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: .............Harry Potter dies of cancer!!!! ...but you all saw that coming...
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ..........Voldemort becomes a born-again Christian!!!!
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: .............Ron was captured and beheaded by terrorists!!!!!!!
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ............Hermione gets knocked up by Neville!!!!!!!!!
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: .............The school catches fire and burns down!!!!
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ..........Harry's dad is still alive, living in a P.O.W. camp!!!!!!
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but the biggest spoiler of all...
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Malfoy isn't a natural blonde!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-07-22 [Lethan]: *pats mort on the head* good for you. ....*then sets him on fire and watches*
2007-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...brr... it's cold in here...
2007-07-22 [Lethan]: yes, better turn the heating up.
2007-07-24 [Eloura]: *looks aeround* Boy it get's quite quiet in here when i'm not on.
2007-07-24 [Lethan]: well get on then, so the party can begin! *puts on party hat*
2007-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yo, yo. *eats ramen*... why has there only been 2 comments over the past two days?
2007-07-25 [nokaredes]: ...because the rest of us have lives?
2007-07-25 [Lethan]: haha, indeed!
2007-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiiiiiight...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-25 [Lethan]: damn, he's on to us! run! RUN!
2007-07-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm...
Here's a pic of my scar from where my hand went through the window,


  

2007-07-25 [nokaredes]: ...are you Harry Potter?
2007-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: No... it's Misty! What are you, blind or something?! ...sheesh... by the way, that's one hairy arm you got there... ever think about shaving it and using it as a shag carpet...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...Wasn't Harry Potter's scar on his forehead?
2007-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: It was originally intened to be on his left testical... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...Ooookaaaay...*starts eating wookie flavored ramen*
2007-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that stuff's too hairy... *eats ramen flavored ramen*...
2007-07-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: And chicks dig Stormtroopers...big time
their like...intergalactic rockstars
stormtroopers get laid men, but not me
if i want a little love, i got to hitch a ride to mos eisley
50 cents for a wookie prostitute
50 seconds pleasure
and 50 years of regret...wookie love is pointless
my life is pointless
i gotta get ya of this planet


I've had wookies on the brain for the past few days.
2007-07-26 [nokaredes]: ...but, but... it's totally a lightning-bolt-shaped scar! :O
2007-07-26 [Xeroh Kanoe]: But Wookie flavored ramen...*offers nokaredes a bowl*
2007-07-26 [nokaredes]: I'm too busy pointing accusingly at Misty (*cough*harrypotter*cough*) to eat anything... but thanks...
2007-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*points at the sign on the wall saying, "No rejecting free ramen!"*...
2007-07-26 [Lethan]: i didnt see that sign there a minute ago..you're making things up as you go along again, arent you?
2007-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmm....I'm not Harry Potter,my real name is mary,wait harry and mary ryme,OH NO VOLDEMORT IS GONNA GET ME!!!*screams*While I scream and run visit my new wiki,Misty-chan's art.*screams and runs*
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: Thats crazy. I leave for a week and.......




Nothing changes.
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Nothing ever changes... *eat ramen*... 'cept that shape-shifting blob in the corner... but he's mostly harmless... *the blob violently attacks misty*... and "Harry" doesn't really rhyme with "Mary"! ...If anything, it'll be Valumart, not Voldemort after you...
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at another sign angrily stating, "No questioning the signs!"*
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: No, it's not ok! ...*runs away sobbing*... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: WTF?!
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: Now look what you've done. You've made him cry. Off to the concentration camps for you.
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Should I give him a hug?*hugs [Mortified Penguin]*Don't cry,I'm sorry.
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Aww... that was so sweet and kind! I'm perfectly ok now... but that still doesn't change anything... *the gang of chickens burst in and drag Misty off to Bob's Family Fun Center/
Concentration Camp*...
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: DAMN CHICKENS*shoots all of the chickens*
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *the chickens use their unholy powers to regenerate and replicate*
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: *They're the chickens from Legend of Zelda - The Ocarina of Time! They cant die! Thankfully they were feeling generous and just dragged her Misty1 away instead of pecking her to death, like they usually do*
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is gone before the chickens regenerate completely*
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: *The chickens appear out of nowhere! Misty1 cant escape!*
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is in paris*
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...not those chickens! ...*huddles up in a ball and rocks back and forth*... *mutters to himself*... no more chickens, mamma, no more chickens... No! ...not you too, Epona! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: *Chickens are in paris!*
(Teach you to beat up chickens with a sword! Hyah!)
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Run, run, as fast as you can, you can't catch me, I'm the- SCREE! CRONCH! BOOOOOM!!
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort?
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...s-sorry... it's the alcohol... I swear... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I feel,I feel.*glomps Mort*
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn it! This Misty-B-Gone spray isn't working! ...*swats Misty with a giant fly swatter*...
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY,I'm not a fly.
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: *is frying up some cucoos* hmm, they dont seem to get angry about thi- *gets mercilessly attacked by a horde of cucoos on horseback*
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, they do that... I'm used to it by now though... *eats cucoo flavored ramen*... *is pecked violently*...
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *nukes Paris*
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: aw, now europe smells of burnt frenchmen, thanks a lot. its going to take AGES to get rid of that damned smell.
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: i mean, it goes into the carpets, and ya have to scrub em REAL hard for ages...
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I've still got the smell of burnt Canadians in my carpet... it's almost the same...
2007-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: No it isn't.
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: certainly brings a tear to the eye.
2007-07-27 [nokaredes]: Like onions...
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: *sob*
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *writes an Onion romance novel*... Gone With the Turnips... "Quite frankly my pear, I don't give a damn!"
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: *cough* obvious copryright theft *cough*
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who, me?! ...the ever famous and lucrative creator of the Barry Cotter series?! ...as well as the Star Whores series... and the book The Adventures of Tom Sawyours and Huckleberry Sharkfin... and even the award winning Codfather trilogy...
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: whoa, guess i was wrong! sorry to doubt ya.
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I also made some famous childrens rhymes... such as,


Hey piddle, piddle,
The rat ate my skittle,
The sow jumped over the balloon,
The little frog laughed to see such a sport,
and the fish ran away with the baboon.
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...then there was my other childrens books... Silence of the Hams, Friday the Fourteenth, and my documentary, Michael Jackson: Candy Giver...
2007-07-27 [nokaredes]: ...there "was books" eh?
2007-07-27 [Eloura]: Books?
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...they were removed from the shelves after it became apparent that my books were giving children cancer...
2007-07-27 [Eloura]: ahhh ok that dam cancer..
2007-07-27 [nokaredes]: ...brain cancer, right?
2007-07-27 [Pillowthief]: Nope, skin cancer. Mort gives me rashes.
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: hopefully he's banned from making books now, then? *crosses fingers*
2007-07-27 [Eloura]: *also crosses fingers* We can only hope.
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*makes more books*... Anthrax: Nature's Sugar...
2007-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*makes another book*...Therapist: The Rapist...*eats ramen*...
2007-07-27 [Lethan]: dammit all. *uncrosses fingers*
2007-07-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *makes a book*Sherry Farter and the courser's phone
2007-07-28 [Eloura]: *makes a book* How to live through Mort's Books: Vol. 1
2007-07-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmm...I should read that.
2007-07-29 [Lethan]: I think I'll join in this racket while the going is good and the lawsuits are low... *makes a book* 1000 Ways to Cook Turnips
2007-07-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-07-29 [Eloura]: *makes another books* How to love Bob's Diner: Vol. 1
2007-07-29 [nokaredes]: ...and there's Mortimer's que to sue you for copyright infringement...
2007-07-29 [Lethan]: dang and blast! *hides evidence*
2007-07-29 [Pillowthief]: *Cooks up a book*






*In Bob's Diner's kitchen! It doesnt turn out too well, possibly due to the kitchens cookware, or maybe the sad, wornout, uncreative excuse for a author's brain. One of the cooks later finds the book, can't figure out what it is and so decides to add it to da menu*
2007-07-29 [Lethan]: now it really IS a cookbook!
2007-07-29 [Pillowthief]: Yarg.
2007-07-29 [Lethan]: sorry, i just couldnt help myself...
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Man, this wiki sucks! ...what kind of moron would own such a stupid piece of crap...?! ...I should find him and slap him... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: This is your wiki.
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who me?
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: yes you.
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...couldn't be!
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: It is.
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: (psst! Your line was supposed to be "then who?"!)
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,then who?
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...forget it... the routine's all messed up... we'll have to see if we can get the munchkins back next monday for a re-shoot... *does tedious paperwork*...
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Please, Mr/s. Stacy... can't you see I'm rescheduling...? ...no... that won't work... my wife's going into labor that day... can't do it Friday, 'cause that's the day I was planning on hijacking that plane.......
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE HELL?!
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...shush! ...no, Saturday's no good... that's when I'm taking those orphans hostage... then later that day I was going to snipe out some innocent victims... and I can't do it Sunday... I'm a pious man... I need to go to church... hmm... well... maybe Monday after the munchins... if my twelve o' clock manicure is willing to reschedule...
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2007-07-30 [nokaredes]: *does not blink*
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... yo, Nok... you goin' to the afterparty next Monday...? ...the munchkins really want to meet you...
2007-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmm...
2007-07-30 [nokaredes]: ...what did you tell these "munchkins" that would make them want to meet me?
2007-07-30 [Lethan]: credit card details, probably.
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I... I didn't tell them you were loose... *eats ramen*...
2007-07-30 [Pillowthief]: *has no eyelids*
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *shines a bright light in your eyes*
2007-07-30 [Pillowthief]: *Tries to stab Mort, but is blind!*
2007-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *squirts lemon juice in your eyes*
2007-07-31 [nokaredes]: *is a kind person* *stabs Mortimer because Pillowthief can't*
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...why...? ...why?! ...*eats ramen*... *bleeds all over the place*...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: *Screams as I cant blink the horrible citris away!*
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *squirts some ammonia and bleach in there too*
2007-07-31 [nokaredes]: ...I told you why, didn't I?
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... I suppose you did...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: *Is making absolutely no sense with his mindles blabber and bad english! Damn the citrus!*
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: Blargrahra!
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I wouldn't be worried about the citrus so much as the mustard gas forming from the bleach and ammonia mixing in your eyes... *puts on gas mask*... mmm... mustard... *tries to eat ramen, but can't because he's wearing a mask*...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: *Realises he is Westley from the Princess Bride and laughs flippantly in the face of danger*
(that means im immune 'cause Im cool like that. Nurhur!)
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...have a molotov cocktail... on the house! ...*slides you one on the bar*...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: (Takes the fuse out, and drinks the alcohol?)
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn... I probably should have thrown that...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: Probably...
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*throws molotov ramen at you*...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: (Is speachless- drenched in noodles and alcohol)
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ........you gonna eat those noodles?
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: (Ugh)
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats those noodles*...
2007-07-31 [Pillowthief]: (Ugh x 2. Mort just ate alcohol soaked noodles)
2007-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *laps up the alcohol*
2007-07-31 [Lethan]: pure 100% alcohol, at that.
2007-07-31 [nokaredes]: Not only that, but I think Mort ate them off of you...
2007-08-01 [Lethan]: oh hells, i better go get the mop ready...no wait, ill get the shovel.
2007-08-01 [Pillowthief]: (Ewwww)
2007-08-02 [Lethan]: well, im off for a week. no stealing my secret money cache that is in no way hidden under the squaky floorboard near table 4, ok? good. ....oh. bugger.
2007-08-02 [Pillowthief]: (Still grossed out)
2007-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: noodles
2007-08-02 [nokaredes]: Comments are moving slow here today...
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: I blame that Nokaredes kid...
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: So... I just started playing Spinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow. I got a kick out of one of the names on it...
2007-08-03 [nokaredes]: ...?
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: I proves my theory that I had going. Mort is a terrorist.


Sam's coming for you Mort. Sam's a coming.
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...never! ...darn Fisher... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-03 [nokaredes]: How is Mort a terrorist...?
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: Cause Sam Fisher says he is.
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts smallpox in the food here*
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: *Hey you smallpox! 'Et out of here! Us Anthrax was here ferst.*
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *...and us Ebola Zaire? If a vulture eats the two of you, nothing happens... if it eats me, he gets massive internal hemorrhaging!*
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: We have vutures? Live ones?
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...most of them are still alive... *the vultures swarm over the seldomly heard from Bob's corpse*...
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: *Is no longer re-dead, for fear of vultures*
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *they fly at you but crash into the chickens and start brawling*
2007-08-03 [Pillowthief]: Run away vultures! You cannot defeat them!
2007-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly, for no particular reason, the pride of lions leap into the scuffle*
2007-08-04 [nokaredes]: *yawns*
2007-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*consumes oriental noodles*...
2007-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2007-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: HAR HAR!!!! HOOKERS!!!!!!! .......*eats chinese food*......
2007-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry... just reminiscing... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-05 [Pillowthief]: You get bored really easily.
2007-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgeYWljNGis
2007-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...best show ever!
2007-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2007-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: You say that a lot... *eats ramen*... but I suspect you're not actually British...
2007-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes I am.
2007-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You might be French with those hairy arms, but you're not British...
2007-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever.
2007-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...shouldn't that be one word...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: No*eats yo ramen*
2007-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that wasn't my ramen... that was... my medication! ...*chokes and dies*...
2007-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: Has anyone heard of a band called The Gallows
2007-08-10 [Pillowthief]: Or Kadisfly?
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,and no.
2007-08-10 [Pillowthief]: You have bad taste in music, dont you?
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: I've heard a mention of Kadisfly never acualy got to listen. Have you hear The Gallows Pillow?
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I like Simple Plan,switchfoot,Sum 41,Thirty Seconds To Mars,Angels and Airwaves,Incubus,Whitestrips,Pink,Ac/Dc,Guns And Roses,Twisted Sister,Smashmouth,Hoobastank,bands I can't remember the names of at the momment,and Country bands.
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: I like a alot of them alot. Just i saw this band at warp tour. there pretty cool.
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: cool
2007-08-10 [nokaredes]: Not a lot of comments since my last one... I guess that's what happens when I go on vacation...
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah.
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: True.
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs mort*
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: *steals all the ramen and replaces with rice for a joke*
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: YUM!*eats the rice*
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: Cool!
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: *dies*
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh?
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: I haven't been here in so long...I'm assimilating into the conversation again...
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: *bites all out of hunger*
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Damn KFC!

2007-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a big bite of rice*... hey... what the?!
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: KFC Rules, man! ...*eats some finger lickin' good chickin*...
2007-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: And we all know the best band ever is the Red Hot Chili Peppers...
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!*slaps the chicken away*They torture the chickens,they put them in boiling water while they are still alive.
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: KFC in my town is nasty...you eat there when you want to die...
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh,I love The Red Hot Chili Peppers!
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: that's terible
2007-08-10 [Eloura]: *just listens*
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...?
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: Any who...I kinda like Shindig...Richie pretty much rocks my flip flops...
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Flip flops??
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: I don't wear socks any more...
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: why?
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: Some one put them in the soup...
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: Yeah...that's why you don't eat the soup here.....
2007-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dang it Mort,that's nasty.
2007-08-10 [Lethan]: *eats soup* wait, what!?
2007-08-10 [nokaredes]: Kentuckyfriedcruelty is related to PETA...
2007-08-10 [DarkAngel3]: I'm sorry...it was supposed to be a secret...
2007-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...they don't boil chickens alive... where do you get your information?!
2007-08-12 [Pillowthief]: You cant kill them! They're immortal!
*The chickens from Legend of Zelda appear again to peck out the eyes of KFC consumers!*
2007-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*catches a chicken*... *uses it to fly off the roof*... *lands in the street*... *gets run over by a truck*...
2007-08-13 [Pillowthief]: A KFC delivery truck...
2007-08-13 [Eloura]: *waits to know what going on as she eats chicken ramen*
2007-08-13 [DarkAngel3]: *runs to help Mort up...and is promptly run over by the KFC truck backing into the parking lot of the evil KFC... *
2007-08-13 [Lethan]: oh hell, not again! *quickly drives truck away*
2007-08-13 [DarkAngel3]: *is squishered by the truck driven by Lethandros* I'm....not okay...call the doctor before Mort decides to put the rest of me in the soup...
2007-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: mmm... cannibal soup...
2007-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...damn you, KFC!! ...*eats some KFC*... man, this is some good chicken!
2007-08-13 [DarkAngel3]: I thought you were dead! If you can eat chicken, you can help me up!
2007-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, I could... but you're all dirty from those tires... and I just washed my hands... *eats chicken*...
2007-08-13 [DarkAngel3]: Doesn't that mean you're all dirty, too? And when do you actually wash your hands to eat?
2007-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: When you and that other guy were getting run over... *eats chicken*...
2007-08-13 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *stealthily comes in and throws smoke bomb, then shoves explodeing jelly beans down everyones throat. moving to a good vantage point, she watches everyones head turn to a gooey spray that covers everythong in a fime red mist*
2007-08-13 [DarkAngel3]: Everythong...wooo...fime...


I'm new to this exploding jelly beans concept...did you make them yourself?
2007-08-13 [Pillowthief]: Didnt your mother ever teach you not to take candy from strangers? That they might be explosive jellybeans? My mother did.
2007-08-13 [DarkAngel3]: No...my mother wanted me to take candy from strangers...she asked them to take me off her hands....I love my mommy dearest...I love her more 6 feet under...
2007-08-13 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, that sucks. My mommy loooves me.
2007-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...in... a platonic sense, right?
2007-08-13 [Pillowthief]: *choke* Yes! In a platonic way!
2007-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiight... *eats ramen, I mean chicken*...
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: Ramen is much better than chicken...
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *glad she missed out on the jelly beans and eats special chicken ramen*
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: Oh my...*stealthily steals special ramen*
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *steals back and locks Dark in a padded cell till finished with ramen. But forgets Dark and leaves Dark there*
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: *bounces about in her new cell* This one is better than the first! I can eat the cotton candy filling!
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *laughs as she hears Dark and say's* Wait up I wanna eat the Candy Filing also. *joins in cell*
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: NO! It's mah cotton candy!
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *cry's* But but but mommy said share..
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: That's what your mommy taught you...my mommy taught me to keep it away from you...*shares anyway*
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *does a happy dance and share chocolate with you*
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: WOOT! Wait...is this the chocolate Mort gave you?
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *nods head* Yep. Haven't tried it yet. But heard it was good.
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: O.o...no thanks...I'm going to go keep the soup bubbling...
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: I'm in debt to bob's diner
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: Why exactly is this?
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: The price of food.
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: Oh...umm....I have yet to pay off anything I've eaten
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: So your in debt to?
2007-08-14 [DarkAngel3]: slighty....*hides*
2007-08-14 [Eloura]: *is also hiding* Only slightly?
2007-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the Bob's Diner Debt Collecting Rhinos burst into the room and start beating random people up*...
2007-08-15 [Pillowthief]: A ramen burning ceremony?
2007-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you can't destroy innocent ramen!
2007-08-15 [Pillowthief]: Rameneata?
2007-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I prefer to celebrate by eating the ramen, rather than torching it...
2007-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yo, ever finish Pandora Tomorrow?
2007-08-15 [Pillowthief]: Not yet, forgot I was playing it...
2007-08-15 [nokaredes]: ...I just lost The Game.
2007-08-15 [Pillowthief]: Sam got you?
2007-08-15 [Eloura]: *is safe from the debt collecting Ehinos and eats ramen*
2007-08-15 [nokaredes]: By "The Game" I meant The Game... but beware! As soon as you read the 5 rules on that wiki, you'll be playing too... and it's quite an annoying game...
2007-08-16 [Pillowthief]: I have discovered the secret! Yes, yes, How to Kill a Pirate!
2007-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *draws an FF judge in his hit manga, Charlie Brown: Smokin' Duces*
2007-08-17 [Lethan]: Argh! damn judges! you cant even hit them! ITS INSANE. of course, i tell them this...but they just give me a yellow card every. damn. TIME.
2007-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Then if you try to assault them or threaten their children, they give you a red card and kick you out of the game! ...it's just ridiculous, man...
2007-08-18 [DarkAngel3]: But do the Debt Collecting Rhinos wear shirts? *has no idea what everyone else is talking about*
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course they wear shirts! ...they don't, however, wear pants.
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Billy Graham is in the hospital! ...'bout time if you ask me...
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: RHINOS DON'T WEAR SHIRTS
2007-08-19 [nokaredes]: PROVE IT
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: have you ever seen a rhino in a shirt?
I've only seen them in over jackets...no shirts around...
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: If you pay close enough attention, you can see them wearing shirts in the background of some Animal Planet shows...
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: NO!! Those were jackets...dinner jackets...
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: Sector 7 are the one's with the cool shirts. They cover them up however- they dont want anybody to shoot them in the chest-plate and call them super-bleeders.
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: exactly how many sectors are there?
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: ...Atleast 7?
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: Or is there only one that happens to be named seven?
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: And you do have a point, I have never seen a Debt Collecting Rhino wear a shirt. I dont think they're really all about the debt collecting though, more of just smashing into things. I dont think that requires a shirt.
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: I don't think so either...but then, why wear dinner jackets?
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: 'Cause their classy like that, but never when their working. Dinner jackets are more for the off hours, casual style.
2007-08-19 [DarkAngel3]: Usually...but then, what do they wear for destroying everything?
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: Not much...
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *a bunch of Hawaiian shirt wearing, debt collecting Rhinos burst in and start beating up [nokaredes]*
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: Rhinos! Watch closely, they must be around here somewhere. *Slowly reaches for his Mime Gun*
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *the rhinos continue mugging [nokaredes] in plain sight*... don't be paranoid... there are no such things as "rhinos"... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: There's one! Shoot it! Shoot it! Its right next to the gold statue man!


Damn, he's gone. Wish those goddamn mimes would make noise or something, they're so hard to track when rhinos are mugging someone.
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: *Glances over at the unconscious, and now penniless, Nok*
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Why'd I ever even buy that gold statue...? ...*sets up traps*... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: I dont think anyone bought him really... He just showed up one day. Wish he did something else than Abe Lincoln, its getting kinda old.
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I've still got that big silver John Wilkes Booth statue in the oven beside the clone-o-matic, the guillotine, the spare cow-brander, the floor gremlin hut, and the everlasting ramen hole...
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it's... a big oven.
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: I would imagine...
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I set up the wiki to where non-elftowners can comment... now Turkey can come... and when he does... *brandishes hatchet threateningly*...
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: *The oven for him!*
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Charlie Brown is watching you!   
2007-08-19 [Pillowthief]: That's... really creepy.
2007-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: It suuuure is... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-20 [nokaredes]: *is now conscious*
2007-08-20 [DarkAngel3]: It's like he's sunburnt...*helps nokaredes up*
2007-08-20 [Insaniac Yoshie]: someone likes the insta-tan to much
2007-08-20 [DarkAngel3]: *pokes and eats ramen*
2007-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]:
Bob Drawing Contest!
2007-08-20 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *wonders if she should be scared*
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...be afraid. Be very afraid. ...or just extra cautious... you never know when something bad might happen... *a meteor crashes through the roof and lands on [Pillowthief]*... kind of like that... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: aww how sad.... hos going to do the euligy?
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: *Is redead?*
2007-08-21 [nokaredes]: I'd celebrate the fact that for once, something bad that happened in B's D did not happen to me, but that just seems like I'm inviting trouble... and of course ho's are going to do the eulogy! They knew Pillowthief better than anyone...
2007-08-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: o.O it made an action!!!! *killes the redead ][Pillowthief]*
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Pillowthief was a... person in life. We all knew him as "that weird kid" while he lived. Up until the tragic meteor mishap, he had always dreamed of running a pancake kiosk. Tragically though, he, not the pancakes, ended up flat. He died doing what he loved best, at least... and that was breathing. All the time with that breathing... he would come in breathing and leave breathing... a bit of an obsession, if you ask me, but he seemed to enjoy it enough. And now, to commemorate him, we will bury him in a place he would have wanted to be buried... out behind the dumpster. R.I.P Pillowthief.
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, if the ho Misty would like to say a few words........
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: *Man, I missed my chance at saying something cool before I died... Like "Uggghghgh! Bleegh."*
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... this hole behind the dumpster isn't big enough... *smashes what he can into the hole and tosses the rest in the dumpster*...
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: *Ow*
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet, you! ...*dismembers you to fit you into the dumpster better*... yup... truly what he would have wanted.
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... now... let's give this poor meteorite a proper burial... *calls thousands of people to come join in the lavish mourning of Jim the Meteorite*...
2007-08-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *pours litter box into dumpster*
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Man, that stinks... *tosses a match in with the kitty litter*...
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Care to donate to the Jim the Meteorite fund, [nokaredes]?
2007-08-21 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *puts belly lint in donation jar*
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: *Is reincarnated as.... Himself? God must have felt sorry for me being thown in a Bob's DIner dumpster...
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *taps sign on the jar*... "Earwax only, please."
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, Pillow... would you care to donate? ...it goes to help victims, such as yourself... of course, you won't be recieving any of the money... only me... because I... uh... got hit in the arm with a piece that broke off of Jim... it really hurt... I almost bled....... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-21 [DarkAngel3]: Almost...huh...isn't that blood all over there yours?
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: Nope, that's mine...
2007-08-21 [Eloura]: Nope it's mmine
2007-08-21 [DarkAngel3]: Oh...well...isn't that the cat that was in the soup thats stuck on your back?
2007-08-21 [Eloura]: Yea i can't figure out how it got there.
2007-08-21 [DarkAngel3]: Huh...well...I don't know....*yanks cat off Eloura's back and throws it back in the soup * Meow, meow, meow, meow....
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: *Thinks about eating ramen, but doesnt. 'Cause Ramen is gross*
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...filthy lies!
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: Except the shrimp stuff. If I season it heavily I can usually eat it.
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Just don't use too much oregano...
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: Garlic. It masks the smell of... whatever they put in ramen that makes it smell so bad.
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: This here, frum one of my mangas... Kooh Estion Mark.   
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I might actually upload some other stuff for once... but... that sure would take a lot of time and effort... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: Loooove my work computer. It blocks images by known non-pirates too.
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Sounds like a great computer...
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: More of a network, really. Its a pirate too.
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: If only you'd gone with the ninja network...
2007-08-21 [Pillowthief]: No no! They steal our staplers!
2007-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it's a small price to pay... well, that and the initial $12.99...
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: Pirates steal the 3-hole punches, but nobody uses those anyway.
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: It's still not as bad as those gangsters... they steal packets of paper from time to time...
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: Straight from the printer! Those bastards.
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Good thing they only work on the 2nd floor... it's nice and safe here on the 7th. Except for the samurais...
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...well, them and the Huns...
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: Watch out for those guys, they're into the whole 'dis-memberment' thing.
2007-08-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: isnt precinct 13 a movie?
2007-08-22 [DarkAngel3]: O.o *avoids 2nd and 7th floor*
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...maybe?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-08-22 [DarkAngel3]: Are there other precincts?
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I would assume there are precincts 1-12...
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ChGcfHieqqs
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: My goodness, apparently someone was having a fit of random boredom. *smiles* I shall have to look around. 
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *mutates from the chemicals in the noodles*...
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: *stares at mutated Penguin* *snarfs mutated Penguin*
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: *spits Penguin back out* Where did you get that ramen? 
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Terrorists... why?
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: Why are you eating it when it's radioactive? 
2007-08-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: that ramen must have been from chyrnobal. its a radioactive paradise
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...extra flavoring?
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: No kidding! Years after the plant exploded, and there are still babies being born with birth defects caused by radiation exposure. *blinks* Do they make counterfeit ramen there?
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...coool... mutant babies...
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: Not cool. Most of them don't live for more than a few months, at the most. 
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Most of them... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: Yep. do you get your ramen there?
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I get my ramen off an unmarked truck...
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: Bought or stolen? 
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...stolen, of course...
2007-08-22 [Insaniac Yoshie]: their calling chyrnobal a wildlife utopia now did ya know? none of the animals are affected it seems so the populations are exploding. theres even signs of bears... that havent been bears in that area for like 100 years
2007-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Where do you get your information...?
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: Ah, when one has no idea of what one is getting . . . did you know that the US Mint transports the paper dollar bills are made from in a similar fashion? 
2007-08-22 [DarkAngel3]: I did! *waves hand in the air* Me!
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: *looks at DarkAngel3* Where did you learn about it? 
2007-08-22 [DarkAngel3]: When I was crated off by aliens...they stole my ramen, too...
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: ...we get paper bills them from mating mutant radioactive animals?
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: *wides eyes* Evil aliens! No wonder Penguin's ramen is radioactive! The aliens are stealing the good ramen! BTW, I learned about the US Mint thing off CSI: Miami. 
2007-08-22 [DarkAngel3]: The aliens love ramen...that's the only reason they come to Earth anymore...
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: *blinks* That explains a great deal . . . *ponders*
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: No, Pillowthief, we don't. It's just a random piece of information that popped into my head while I was typing. 
2007-08-22 [DarkAngel3]: But what if the government is taken over by aliens? What if we don't get any more ramen because they are hording it all?
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: Where do we get our paper bills if not from mating mutant radioacted animals?
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: Could they teach us to make giant corn??
2007-08-22 [Ukia]: You don't know, Pillowthief? Paper bills are made from a government-protected formula of cotton pulp. Which means that technically, paper bills are actually cloth, which is why they don't disintegrate when they go through the washing machine. 
2007-08-22 [Pillowthief]: It is the question that drives me...
2007-08-23 [Ukia]: You're bored, aren't you?
2007-08-23 [Pillowthief]: You sure its not by the mutant radioactive animals? I mean, the whole compressed cloth made by government protected fomulas is a little unbelievible.
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Let's not forget that the bills are magnetic too... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-23 [Ukia]: *shakes head* The History Channel is very clear with its documentaries on the US Mint. The "History of Gold" episode was particularly interesting. And the reason the formula's government-protected is so that no one can use it to make counterfeit bills. Inflation is bad enough when it's government-mandated, thank you.
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course the government would rather you believe some crazy story about "cotton" and "fabric"... but isn't it just more likely that they're secretly making the bills out of mutant animals...?
2007-08-23 [Ukia]: *rolls eyes* Dragons make it their business to know about matters of wealth. The history about the US Mint documentaries have extensive research behind them. The history of Fort Knox has even more so. 
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heh... heh heh... "Knox"...
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...us entrepreneurs also make it our business to know about matters of wealth...
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and stocks! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-08-23 [Ukia]: *shakes head* *takes away ramen* 
2007-08-23 [Ukia]: What? I'm a 36-foot-long purple dragon, and I will do as I wish! *throws radioactive ramen*
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Mutha' ******! I'm a penguin! ...don't disrespect the tux! ...*pimp slaps you*... *eats ramen*...
2007-08-23 [Pillowthief]: *Im going to have to call you back- its on*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: *backs out of the room*
2007-08-23 [nokaredes]: *was never in the room*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: Oh my...*scurries after thrown radioactive ramen*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: *runs back in* any of you seen my pet? it kinda looks like a radioactive bowl of ramen...WITH SHARP POINTY TEETH.
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: *is eating the radioactive ramen* NO! *turns around*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: nooo...squishikins! *grabs his pet and starts stroking it* there there....
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: Aww! That was good ramen...*sad now*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: then go get your own weapon of mass ramen-related destruction!
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: *wanders off to find her own ramen*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: try behind the ordering counter! thats where i found mine!
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: *mutters* amongst other horrible...horrible things...*shudders*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: o.O Now I don' wanna! *hides under a chair*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: oh but you do. *eats breadsticks*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: Those have been in the soup! *scuttles out from under the chair to hide under the table*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: havent you noticed? all the food in here has been in something else. *eats another breadstick*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: My socks where in that soup! Along with the chickens!
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: ....amongst other things, too...*crunch*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: *steals ramen from where it was stuck under the table* I almost have a full bowl...
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: thats not a bowl.
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: I know that! It's the skull of that one kid...but it works just fine!
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: i think the rest of the corpse went in the meat grinder. *eats sausages*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: I think so, too...but I just wanted the top of his skull...
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: well then, enjoy your cranium! *eats more breadsticks-there seems to be an unlimited supply of them...*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: Thanks...*slurps ramen out of the skull*
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: *digests partally digested digestives*
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: exactly how many of those have you had today?
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: is 'lots' a number?
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: I don't think so...not that I know of, any way...
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: it comes after three thousand eight hundred and fifty one, i think.
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: O.o 


Wow...you eat alot don't you?
2007-08-23 [Lethan]: not often, no..im just testing a theory! these breadsticks seem to be UNLIMITED. so im just testing to see if they really are UNLIMITED BREADSTICKS.
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: heh...*steals a breadstick from the large pile infront of Leth*
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... yes... "breadsticks"...
2007-08-23 [DarkAngel3]: *stares at Mort* What exactly aren't in these?
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...um... bread...?
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2007-08-23 [Pillowthief]: Whats with the rambo dog with the bazooka?
2007-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...how should I know?! ...ask [nokaredes].
2007-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmm...I've missed alot.
2007-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no you haven't! *smacks you*
2007-08-24 [Eloura]: I've missed more O.o
2007-08-24 [nokaredes]: *eats sticks not made of "bread"*
2007-08-24 [Lethan]: *crunch*
2007-08-24 [Lethan]: *munch*
2007-08-24 [Lethan]: *slurp* uh...breadsticks dont go slu- OH DEAR GOD WHAT IS THIS!?
2007-08-24 [DarkAngel3]: I TOLD YOU!!!
2007-08-25 [nokaredes]: YOU ARE NOW AWARE OF YOUR BREATHING. YOU CANNOT BREATHE INVOLUNTARILY. YOU CONTROL EACH BREATH. Suckers.
2007-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *has an iron lung*
2007-08-25 [nokaredes]: ...just one?
2007-08-25 [Eloura]: *bites steel bread* I have stell teeeth
2007-08-25 [DarkAngel3]: What does that have to do with breathing?
2007-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2007-08-26 [Pillowthief]: Wow. I really need to remember to not leave you guys alone, your like my dog. i leave him alone and he chews on the couch.
2007-08-26 [DarkAngel3]: I swear it wasn't me! *still chewing on part of the upholstery*
2007-08-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *squirts [DarkAngel3] with waterbottle*
2007-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn termites! ...*sprays some anti-termite spray on [DarkAngel3]*...
2007-08-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: hey thats my job! *takes [Mortified Penguin]s ramen (since he seems to have forgotten about it anyways) and sanitizes him with anti-bacterial gel*
2007-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *orders some ramen from the Ramen Shack down the road* ...it burns! HHIIISSSSS!
2007-08-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *shows [Mortified Penguin] the notice in the paper saying the 'RamenShack' has been condemmed due to an Oompa Loompa infestation*
2007-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn you Willy Wonka!! ...*shakes fist at the sky*...
2007-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: He should have know immigrants are cheaper than Oompa Loompas anyway... *orders from the Ramen Shack² two blocks down*...
2007-08-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: i wonder what they use to get rid of oompa loompas.... rabid platapusses maybe?
2007-08-26 [Pillowthief]: *Quietly orders destruction of Ramenshacks everywhere*
2007-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Mutant anteaters are the only things that can get rid of them... *orders from Ramen Shack³²²*...
2007-08-26 [Insaniac Yoshie]: um i believe the word 'everywhere' covers all bases dude... so guess itll have to be second rate Ramen-O-Rama from now on
2007-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...NEVER!!! ...*torches Ramen-O-Rama*... *orders from Ramen E. Cheeses*...
2007-08-27 [Pillowthief]: ....Ew. Forgot that one.
2007-08-27 [DarkAngel3]: *is still dripping from being sprayed with water and anti-termite stuff* Well...there's always Granny's House of Ramen...
2007-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: That ramen tastes so old...
2007-08-27 [Insaniac Yoshie]: yes and its so vintage its black and white... no wait.... maybe thats just mold...
2007-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: First-grade class in Brooklyn comes in from recess. Teacher asks Sarah: "What did you do at recess?"


Sarah says, "I played in the sand box."


Teacher says, "That's good. Go to the blackboard, and if you can write 'sand' correctly, I'll give you a fresh-baked cookie."


She does and gets a cookie. Teacher asks Morris what he did at recess.


Morris says, "I played with Sarah in the sand box."


Teacher says, "Good. If you write 'box' correctly on the blackboard, I'll give you a fresh baked cookie."


Morris does, and gets a cookie. Teacher then asks Mustaffa Abdul Machmoud what he did at recess.


He says, "I tried to play with Sarah and Morris, but they threw rocks at me."


Teacher says, "Threw rocks at you? That sounds like blatant racial discrimination. If you can go the blackboard and write 'blatant racial discrimination' I'll give you a cookie."
2007-08-28 [DarkAngel3]: O.o what does that have to do with ramen?


'Tis funny though...
2007-08-28 [Pillowthief]: I like to throw rocks. At your face.
2007-08-31 [Ukia]: *wanders in* At who's face? *big dragon grin*
2007-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Suckers... I was voted class president today, and Turkey got vice president... get some! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: http://cgi.ebay.com/sodium-hydroxide-lye-caustic-soda-10-lbs-biodiesel_W0QQitemZ220145503344QQihZ012QQcategoryZ3089QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem



I gots get me some of this... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-01 [Lethan]: just tell me which foods you're going to put it in first...
2007-09-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: whoo da fook in der right minds needs 10 lbs of lye?!
2007-09-01 [Lethan]: the same species that needs oxygen to live, obviously.
2007-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*lives on Carbon dioxide*...
2007-09-02 [Lethan]: *gasp* so you're a tree! that explains so much.
2007-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *grows slowly*... *takes miracle grow*... *gets kicked off the football team for taking "steroids"*...
2007-09-02 [Pillowthief]: Heee-nuup-chuck! *Britney Spears takes your place on the football team.*
2007-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Filthy indians... *shakes branch in anger*...
2007-09-03 [Lethan]: *the branch shaking dislodges a birds nest, making a nest of eggs plummet toward the ground and splat*
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: Aww...I was gonna make an omelet with those...*throws the frying pan at the foot ball team*
2007-09-03 [Pillowthief]: *It hits Britney Spears! She morphs into Mega-Britney and eats [DarkAngel3]'s soul. Too bad the Fat One was nowhere to be found...*
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: Woah...I had a soul? Damnit! Give it back, fatty!
2007-09-03 [Pillowthief]: *Mega-Britney growls unintelligibly*
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: *runs over and kicks at her toes* Give it back!
2007-09-03 [Pillowthief]: *Heee-nuup-chuck!*
2007-09-03 [Pillowthief]: Chuck Norris enters the scene, confused by what had sounded like a mating call. Frustrated and now angry, Chuck Norris Round-House kicks Mega-Britney in the face, proving that Britney Spears was a ninja.
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: Ninjas? *scampers away*
2007-09-03 [Lethan]: *hides in the stands, avoiding chuck and britney's evil gaze*
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: *hides behind Leth* You don't happen to have a spare soul, do you?
2007-09-03 [Eloura]: *offers up a spare soul* Hi
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: Hia! *gladly takes the soul*
2007-09-03 [Eloura]: *grins* Enjoy!
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: *slips into the soul*...or should I eat it?
2007-09-03 [Eloura]: Eating the soul as pure as it is would be a delacy not even found at suck a fine establishment as this.
2007-09-03 [DarkAngel3]: No...I wanna keep it...I don't mean eat it for nourishment...although how much of that you'll find here, I'm unsure of...>>
2007-09-03 [Lethan]: what? i eat all my food here, and i'm fine! *the voice, however, is coming from his left elbow...*
2007-09-04 [DarkAngel3]: O.o
2007-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll have you know we do serve souls here... Did you think we just threw 'em out every time someone died...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-09-04 [Pillowthief]: *Wonders who ate my old soul...*
2007-09-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *nibbles on pillows soul*
2007-09-04 [Pillowthief]: Give that back!
2007-09-04 [Lethan]: no soul-backs.
2007-09-04 [Lethan]: not even one.
2007-09-04 [Lethan]: not even for YOU.
2007-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Mr. You? That Chinese guy?
2007-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Now... I will announce this week's official Member Of The Week... it is... me! ...I congratulate myself. Now, if I don't mind, get back to work! *slaps himself*
2007-09-04 [Pillowthief]: What do you do around here Mort? Besides make snide remarks...
2007-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...um... uh... I... Look! ...it's a comet! ...*runs away*...
2007-09-04 [Pillowthief]: WHO made him president?
2007-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Jimmy...?
2007-09-04 [Pillowthief]: Death to Jimmy! Ra Ra Ra!
2007-09-05 [Eloura]: *joins in on chant*
2007-09-05 [Pillowthief]: Rable Rable Rable!
2007-09-05 [Pillowthief]: Pst! (Delete Sunrose now!)
2007-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...What's that about scrabble?!
2007-09-05 [nokaredes]: Did we forget about the comet?!
2007-09-05 [Eloura]: COMET COMET WHERE!?!?!?!?
2007-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Seeing comets, eh? ...classic signs of Meteorosis, otherwise know as Comitosis or Comit Sydrome. It is often caused by severe- *gets hit by comet*
2007-09-05 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2007-09-05 [nokaredes]: That's that you get for pretending to be a doctor...
2007-09-05 [Lethan]: and a farmer.
2007-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but... I did grow that big crop of corn... I swear!
2007-09-05 [Pillowthief]: That... was the giant Indians. Not you.
2007-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Freakin' Apache Chief... *pollutes*... take that!
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: Not those Indians... The Cleveland Indians! *The team takes turns throwing baseballs at your head*
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOHOHOOO!!! Not again!! *the Detroit Tigers burst in and start wrestling the Indians*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *Batman and Santa Claus make use of the distraction and begin to fight!*
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly, out of nowhere, Mr. Rogers bursts in riding on Chuck Norris*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *The Ultimate Showdown begins! Godzilla appears and starts to eat tokyo citizens!*
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *Shaq jumps out and brawls with Aaron Carter*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *Bruce Lee and Abe Lincoln gang up on Chuck Norris!*
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *Superman and the Power Rangers attack Lincoln, knocking the AK-47 out of his hands*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *The Thunder Cats and the A-Team join forces and morph into a giant Cobra Commander droid! (Face decides to flaunt his good looks)*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *Mr T decides that a Giant Cobra Commander doesnt fit his 'style'. He jumps out and finds the Foo Fighters!*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: "Dont give me that gibber-jabber, foo! Less noise sucka!"
2007-09-06 [Sir Soapy]: 'bout freakin' time... *the Foo Fighters beat up Mr. T with their guitars*... *Aquaman swims through the sewers, but accidently into the Ninja Turtle territory, where he is beaten to death*...
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *Wonder Woman does an evil laugh*
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *Wonder Woman's invisible jet gets shot down by terrorists with heat vision goggles*
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: *Wonder Woman thinks better about laughing evilly as she parachutes out using her invisible parachute*
2007-09-06 [nokaredes]: I leave you guys alone and this is what I come back to?!
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no... this is a dream... and a good dream, considering it has me in it...
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *Wonder Woman lands on the roof*...
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: Wait... I dont think you were actually in the Ultimate Showdown, Mort. Chuck Norris would have already killed you.
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: Damn ninjas.
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ever wonder just who it was that "kicked Chuck Norris and his cowboy ass"? ......yo.
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, I think that was actually Bruce Lee, Captain America, Shaq and Batman... Was Abe already dead by that time?
2007-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know... I must study the historical battle on youtube.
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: Yes, so shall I.
2007-09-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: HI!
2007-09-06 [Pillowthief]: ... Where'd Chuck Norris go? He missed a ninja.
2007-09-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2007-09-07 [Pillowthief]: *Chuck Norris rises from the dead to Round-House kick the remaining Misty-ninja in the face*
2007-09-07 [nokaredes]: ...le sigh.
2007-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I think [nokaredes] is also a ninja...
2007-09-07 [Eloura]: *comes running in with a newly tuned guitar and goes* Hiya!
2007-09-08 [Lethan]: *untunes the guitar*
2007-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *the termites from the bar stools attack the guitar*
2007-09-08 [Lethan]: *the bar stools attack leth* aaaarrgh...! my precious jugular!
2007-09-09 [nokaredes]: I'm sure you could live without your jugular if you tried hard enough...
2007-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, them bar stools'll do that...
2007-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots birds down from the sky*... *hits a plane*... *the plane crashes into an orphanage*... *the orphanage explodes, sending flaming orphans through the air*...... woops. *hides gun*
2007-09-09 [Eloura]: *pouts* Dam cost me 2 bucks to get that thing fixed Lol *shrugs and laughs at leth*
2007-09-09 [Pillowthief]: I hate coming back online on Sundays. I never know what to expect, but I certainly didnt expect to find a dead Nok and an untuned jugular.
2007-09-09 [Eloura]: lol agreed
2007-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I saw it coming... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-10 [Lethan]: *is still on the floor, bleeding. a lot.* this place smells like crispy orphans...
2007-09-10 [Eloura]: mmmmmm yum.
2007-09-10 [Lethan]: *crunch* *munch*
2007-09-10 [Eloura]: *grumbles and eats ramen of the older more aged variety*
2007-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ah, yes. The '87 brand. 1787... that was a good year...
2007-09-11 [Eloura]: a delsious year.
2007-09-11 [Lethan]: wait...vintage ramen?
2007-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course...
2007-09-12 [Eloura]: Duh.
2007-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: HI!*glomps everyone*
2007-09-13 [Lethan]: you made me spill my soup...and..and...IT HAD CROUTONS
2007-09-13 [Eloura]: *is glomped then says* You made me eat that crouton O.o
2007-09-13 [Lethan]: i dont think you're getting the point here. soup. croutons. TOMATO SOUP. IT HAD CROUTONS.
2007-09-13 [Eloura]: And your point.
2007-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I spit upon your croutons! *spits upon Misty by accident*
2007-09-14 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2007-09-14 [Lethan]: *mumbles* at leat i still have my breadsticks. *crunch*
2007-09-14 [Eloura]: *steals breadsticks and uses them to build a fortess that can be broken down only by eating, and bombs*
2007-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *places bomb*
2007-09-15 [Eloura]: *eats bombs before goes off*
2007-09-15 [nokaredes]: I thought there was only one bomb...
2007-09-15 [Eloura]: *Eats more and burps*
2007-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: That's going to cause some painful heartburn... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Thank goodness I had a spit sheild.*laughs*
2007-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots at misty*
2007-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *has on a bullet proof vest and is in a room made of bullet proff glass*
2007-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I knew I shouldn't have put bullet proof glass in the bathrooms...
2007-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-09-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses a smoke grenade in there*
2007-09-17 [Eloura]: *giggles and burps again* That bomb was a killer.
2007-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiight... *eats ramen*... whatever happened that flea-ridden pillow...?
2007-09-17 [Eloura]: *shrugs* No clue *steals ramen and eats*
2007-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and beat you senseless with a lead pipe*... *they then return the lead pipe back to the water fountain*... I put lead in all the food here... It's even the secret ingredient in the special sauce... well... that and feces...
2007-09-17 [Eloura]: *acualy gains sence since she never had any* OOOOOOOOOOOOOO ok
2007-09-18 [Pillowthief]: *yawn* Im not flea ridden- not anymore anyways. I shaved in the bathroom, before the smoke grenade. Misty helped me with my backhair. You thought that was vintage ramen, but in all actuality I switched my flea-ridden hair with it! I now have old ramen glued to my head. Its really not that bad after you get used to it...


And I cant tell you about the crutons yet, except they werent crutons either...
2007-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Interesting... *eats Pillow's hair*...
2007-09-18 [Pillowthief]: Hmm... this reminds me of that one time...
2007-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sexy stripper slumber parties...?
2007-09-18 [Pillowthief]: No, the other time. That time you were chewing on me or something. Its vague, you must not have done a very good job.
2007-09-18 [Insaniac Yoshie]: alright!!! who left this on my door step?!?!?!?!






  

2007-09-18 [Pillowthief]: Good pirate computer. Even blocks ninja poop. I dont exactly know that's ninja poop, but my computer blocked it, so Im pretty sure.
2007-09-18 [Eloura]: OH! A pirate comp!
2007-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... looks like ninja poop... and tastes like ninja poop... and feels like ninja poop... but I better further analyze this... I'll be in my office if anyone needs me...
2007-09-18 [Pillowthief]: ...good computer.
2007-09-19 [Lethan]: ...wait, you have an OFFICE?
2007-09-19 [Pillowthief]: ...Sorta. Anyways, it seems even ET is a pirate. Take that you scurvy ninjas!
2007-09-19 [Fearathress]: LOL
2007-09-19 [Lethan]: mmm. scurvvy.
2007-09-19 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, not my favorite really... I prefer rum. Which reminds me...
2007-09-19 [Fearathress]: o.O
2007-09-19 [Pillowthief]: I have rum at home.
2007-09-19 [Eloura]: RUM! *evil grin and says* No you have no rum at home anymore.
2007-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...why has elftown betrayed it's noble ninja heritage...?
2007-09-19 [Eloura]: *giggles* the ninja is hidden safely inside
2007-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...inside the underwear drawer, I assume...?
2007-09-19 [Eloura]: of course where else?
2007-09-19 [Pillowthief]: Nooo, my pirate juice!
2007-09-20 [Eloura]: *grins*
2007-09-20 [Lethan]: pirate juice. oh, that sounds so wrong.
2007-09-20 [Lethan]: and yet so right!
2007-09-20 [Eloura]: *grins and laughs*
2007-09-20 [Lethan]: *glug glug glug*
2007-09-20 [Lethan]: *obligatory mouth wipe for effect*
2007-09-20 [Pillowthief]: *obligatory pirate belch*
2007-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELLO!
2007-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: You put the "o hell!" in "hello"... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-09-21 [nokaredes]: I've been breaking a lot of laws lately... I should stop that. At least in front of cops. Does B's D agree...?
2007-09-21 [Pillowthief]: Nobody can Stalk you if... youre in jail...
2007-09-21 [nokaredes]: Ah, well, there's that. Also, free food!
2007-09-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and rape anytime you want! ...and sometimes when you don't want...
2007-09-21 [Eloura]: Exactly! So make us proud at bob's diner!!!!
2007-09-22 [Lethan]: just dont drop the soap.
2007-09-23 [Eloura]: Yes defenatly don't drop the soap
2007-09-23 [Lethan]: *drops the soap*
2007-09-23 [Eloura]: *laughs* Good luck *hides and waits*
2007-09-23 [sunabozu]: *comes up behind* you ahh you're lookin mighty fine there,it'll be a shame if you went missing
2007-09-23 [nokaredes]: I'm on the phone with Mortimer and Turkey RIGHT NOW! :D Mortimer wants me to quote something, but I don't know what...
2007-09-23 [sunabozu]: huh?
2007-09-23 [nokaredes]: Exactly.
2007-09-23 [Eloura]: *raises eyebrow* Ohhhh really? Where would i go missing to?
2007-09-23 [sunabozu]: no wheres in paticular
2007-09-23 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: What is this place?
2007-09-23 [Insaniac Yoshie]: oooOOOOoooo [Pilowthief]'s on main street...
2007-09-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: what did i miss?
2007-09-23 [Pillowthief]: Wow Yoshie, Ive been on Mainstreet for quite a while, ever since I donated... which was like 6 months ago.
2007-09-23 [sunabozu]: how do you donate
2007-09-23 [Pillowthief]: 
2007-09-23 [Pillowthief]: Or follow the links from Mainstreet. You get a badge and extra bonuses like being able to use colored text and stuff.
2007-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and you get five free passes for illegal activities!
2007-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn it... I see Pillowthief everytime I log on...
2007-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn fair... darn [nokaredes]... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-23 [Pillowthief]: I love causing you pain and suffering. It make me feel all fuzzy inside. Like the thought of Chuck Norris kicking babies.
2007-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, that Chuck... FF11 sucks... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-23 [Pillowthief]: Hehehe.
2007-09-23 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Hello,I stumbled upon this "place",What is it about?
2007-09-24 [Pillowthief]: Well, we make fun of Misty alot...


I dont know what else we really do here...
2007-09-24 [nokaredes]: I'm on Mainstreet, and no one mentions me? I feel unloved...
2007-09-24 [Pillowthief]: Oh, burrrrrrrrrnnnnn....
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Some chickens and lions occasionally come through... but... mostly it's just making fun of Misty. *the pride of lions burst in and drag Misty into the streets*
2007-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in*Hi,and maybe you shouldn't talk about me infront of [~Queen Of The Shadows~] She's my sister.
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Younger?
2007-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: She's not my real sister,she's like a sister.She's a day younger.
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Nevermind... it's apparently just a fake sister Misty concocted... the picture would be Misty herself, only with red streaks... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have green eyes not brown,btw my little sister was thinking of joining Et.
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:  ...sure doesn't seem green...
2007-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: You can't tell cause it's too far away.
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, the nearly same birthday and the recent poll makes me even more suspicious... 
2007-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?It isn't my fault my mom and her mom was pregnant at the same time,and is it a crime to want a new hair style?!
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I find it extraordinarily coincidental...
2007-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes isn't it?
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes. It is. She even has the same color stripes in her hair as the one that's winning in your poll... very strange.
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, for such close friends, I find it odd that I'm only just now learning of her existence...
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I also doubt your claims that you're thin, involved, and sixteen.
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5nW609P8usA
2007-09-24 [Pillowthief]: Are you related to Misty, Mort?
2007-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Please don't suggest that. It hurts me to think of such things... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: .......you think pen?
2007-09-25 [Pillowthief]: That must hurt. Thinking and stuff. Good thing I dont have to do it.
2007-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I wish I had an iron brain to do all my thinking for me...
2007-09-25 [Eloura]: *watches* RAMEN!!!! *blinks*
2007-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *cheap bronze brain falls apart*
2007-09-26 [Lethan]: *brain catches fire, replaces it with an asbestos brain*
2007-09-26 [Eloura]: *laughs maniacly*
2007-09-26 [Pillowthief]: 
2007-09-26 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: lol
2007-09-27 [Fearathress]: I shall not comment on that.
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I always knew he was a scarecrow in disguise...
2007-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I always knew he was a scarecrow in disguise....
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: I always knew he was a scarecrow in disguise.....
*couch*
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: Damn it. I mean *cough*.
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I know I'm awesome, but you don't have to copy me... just buy my new book... Become Like Mort in 3 Weeks: A Guide To Self-Improvement...
2007-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know I'm awesome, but you don't have to copy me... just buy my new book... Become Like Mort in 3 Weeks: A Guide To Self-Improvement....
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm a loser
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: Heh, didnt think she would actually fall for that one, did you?
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes...?
2007-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What happened to everything?
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Phil ate it.
2007-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: who's phil?
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Please refrain from killing Phil.
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: Must be a ninja. God I love my pirate computer...
2007-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *hijacks your computer*
2007-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2007-09-27 [Eloura]: *fan girl screams and points at lamp* It did it.
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner's not classy enough for lamps...
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, what's the sitches, bitches?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: *PirateComputer3212 dials Chuck Norris, but unfortunately Chuck wasnt at home. Chuck's house computer writes PirateComputer3212 a raincheck*
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Chuck was in Asia at the time... beating up ninjas...
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: PirateComputer3212 had already ran the analysis and projected the results of where Chuck Norris might be on a nifty pie chart.
  

2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn jungle ninjas...
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: Cobra Commander actually prefers the jungle, especially since its getting so hard for a ninja to hide in the city anymore. Too many pirates around I guess.
2007-09-27 [Pillowthief]: That letter L is obviously a pirate. PirateComputer3212 says so.
2007-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Hail Nobra! *salutes*
2007-09-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: L is way to cool to be a pirate.
2007-09-28 [Pillowthief]: Ah crap, hold on a min, will ya? I got to take care of this...
2007-09-28 [nokaredes]: ...where'd B's D go? o_o
2007-09-28 [Fearathress]: o.O what the hell just happned?
2007-09-28 [Pillowthief]: Blame Phil. He's a ninja.
2007-09-28 [Fearathress]: LOL
2007-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, suuuure... blame Phil... *eats ramen*... no, seriously... blame Phil.
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,DAMN YOU PHIL!
2007-09-28 [Eloura]: WHAT THE HELL!!!!!!!!!
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: i love        
2007-09-28 [Eloura]: *pouts*
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: whats wrong?
2007-09-28 [Eloura]: what happened to bob's diner.
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: i dont know
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: it truned into bob lounge
2007-09-28 [Lethan]: EXPLAINATIONS ARE NESSESARY.
2007-09-28 [Eloura]: than... EXPLAIN!
2007-09-28 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: lol
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: Well it was said by the ruler of beathose that the great lord Wolferd maximus would come down and free the slaves, and free us from the mighty pelican's evil clutches
2007-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Well spoken, my son... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the...?
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: we ran a short recon through the mountain side when we were attacked by the mighty platypus,its tusks were mighty,and hide as strong as steel, so i shouted with a fearce look in my eye"take out your broad swords and swing with a mighty stance"
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: With a name like "snake" I'd think you would be more of a stealth kind of guy that shoots stuff... and sometimes fights giant robots...
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmm...
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: after we backed the wretchid beast away, was built a fire to kieep the mighty platypus at bay,then i toll my companion we shall set up campe here and make for the sumit tomorrow
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmm...
2007-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ......or maybe someone who robs a Hindu convenience store clerk...... *eats ramen*...
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: I think he is ignoring you Mort
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: *stops playing guitar*Hey are you the one exlaining what happening to this place?!
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sits back quietly*
2007-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen inquisitively*...?
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: *laughs and gives misty a guitar*here you go happy birthday


well when i awoke it was warm , i thought to my self its' warm we were in the mountains,then thats when i realized we were inside the platypus,i was soo mad that even the jester sir jables couldnt even calm me down.then i told the lord shauginite to use is sun powers that he had aquired during the fabled "battle of evermore"then with a boom we had destroyed the beast and we were on out way
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *holds the guitar*thanks
2007-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...this sounds like a lute style story, not a guitar.
2007-09-28 [sunabozu]: thats all i got for now
2007-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-09-29 [nokaredes]: You guys sure are lame today...
2007-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2007-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: You mom's lame! ...last night! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE...?
2007-09-29 [Lethan]: and the night before too...
2007-09-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: when hasnt the diner been lame? or semi-gay for that matter.....
2007-09-29 [sunabozu]: So sayth the ruler of beathose
2007-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! Semi-gay?!!
2007-09-29 [Insaniac Yoshie]: not the flaming homosexual gay.... but the insulting gay
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...insulting gay?!!
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?*sneaks away*
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons you*
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...whaling.
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in with icecream*Hey you killed my cutout picture
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *hides flaming cutout* ...uh... no I didn't... it was that guy. *points at Nokaredes*
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok...
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *deals poker*
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'll play.
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *hands you some cards*
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *takes the cards*
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: What do you got?
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I got a royal flush.
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I've got six aces. I win! ...*takes all the chips*...
2007-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh well.*gives your cards back*I'm leaving no one is on,tell turkey I said hi next time you see him.
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, you better run... I got mad skills, son. ...*eats chips*...
2007-09-30 [Lethan]: WAITAMINUTE! those aces....
2007-09-30 [Lethan]: are sligtly bent at the corner! obviously you should take better care of them.
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah... I know... sometimes they get bent when I'm cheating...... on my wife!
2007-09-30 [Pillowthief]: See? I leave you guys alone for 2 days and all of a sudden we have a ninja bard who recites platypus stories, a harpooned flaming cutout of Misty1, which I will not speak about, and Nok is now a guy. Not any guy, but a gay guy. The insulting kind, of course. Wait, that might have been Mort... No, Mort has a wife... I really need to keep a better watch on you guys...
2007-09-30 [Pillowthief]: ...Whaling. That cracks me up.
2007-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You got a problem with whaling, punk...? ...*gang of fishermen slowly approach*... *they attack Misty instead*... Ha ha! ...whale.
2007-09-30 [nokaredes]: I've always been a guy. There are no girls on the internet, you know...
2007-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Oh yeah. Forgot about that. (heh. Whaling. Man that still gets me...)
2007-10-01 [nokaredes]: Nice new name...
2007-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Check this out- I have this weird 13yr old insulting me. [heather101]


She sent me a message saying 'Hi', thats it. How boring. So I said that she wasnt much of a talker. She then sent me a cryptic message saying something like 'u r stupid i wn  4 ut  ', which I couldnt make heads or tails of. I imagine something offensive, but when I asked her to explain she wanted my number for some reason, which Im not dumb enough to give some 13yr old clear across the country my phone number. Now she's stringing together pitiful excuses of insulting vocabulary like, 'suck it', which I can understand a little better than the previous message. Sad, but understandable. Should I give her a link to Bobs so she can experience Morts sick sadistic comments that will eventually make her cry?
2007-10-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: hello
2007-10-01 [Pillowthief]: *like a frickin' brick wall. A big frickin' brick wall...*
2007-10-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: She sent me a message too she said,"U r not 16."That was weird.
2007-10-01 [nokaredes]: ...yes. But only after we stop talking about her.
2007-10-01 [nokaredes]: So anyway. I was surfing this website I found in a diary-change and I came across this http://www.eatliver.com/i.php?n=1239 right when my computer's randomized-music list was playing the Waltz of the Snowflakes from the Nutcracker... and it amused me so I thought I'd mention it...
2007-10-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *to pillow* hi. u r terd wut yoo two dum nuts? eat ablls




can i have your number u hawt
2007-10-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: aha sry had to.... ow it hurt my head to be that dumb...
2007-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I have already sent her a link... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: [spitfire_35121] has finished editing the Romeo and Juliet movie Me, Turkey, and him made... perhaps I will begin manufacturing and prepare to ship them out... *eats ramen*...


(also starring [Kakashi101] and [playa101])
2007-10-01 [nokaredes]: Aww... she's offline. So she won't message me...
2007-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I assumed you also told her to go to Bob's Diner...? ...because... you know... you're contractually obligated to...
2007-10-01 [nokaredes]: I never signed a B's D contract...
2007-10-01 [Eloura]: Did i? *looks around suspisiusly*
2007-10-01 [Lethan]: I remember signing a contract...can only remember a few words on though... 'rabies' 'obligatory' 'not really edible' something like that.
2007-10-01 [Insaniac Yoshie]: =O ------> [Waltzing Warlus]


long lost brother of penguin?!?!?!
2007-10-01 [Eloura]: Must be O.o *suddenly remembers contract* Oppps forgot to advertise.
2007-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Hmm... But Mort didnt sign a contract with anybody else... except the devil. That must mean... Bob is the devil. What have I done?
2007-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Oh ho! unfortunately we will not be witnessing Mort making a pitiful 13yr old cry, as of this morning, she is now a banned member for harrassment. I wonder why...


...What was that Yoshie? Am I being dumb or does everyone else have a secret code or language that they speak only when they want to insult me? Doesnt make much sense to me...
2007-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: (...he's on to us!!)
2007-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... aww... I wanted to make fun of 'er...
2007-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Yes, I know, I wanted you to make fun of her as well.




....Where'd that ninja bard go?
2007-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who knows... a bunch of people show up here and then dissapear the next day... *hides gun*
2007-10-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen-
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *hiss*
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: Gah! What is this? Youre... not gay right? Like the insulting kind.
2007-10-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Nope, I just like to hug Pen because he hates it!! -huggles pen-
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, You should go by YT instead of White...
2007-10-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Do I even want to know what "YT" stands for?
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...please... I have a wife- oh wait... I think I left her in the freezer... I'll go check... later... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: lol you're funny
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: Yours truely, but your not supposed to tell people that. And it sounds like White-y.
2007-10-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: You're just odd, and I like my name.
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait... "brainthief"?! ...zombie!!
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: *Is currently Redead*
2007-10-02 [Eloura]: *blinks*
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: ...Its kinda like being undead, but with a few complications.
2007-10-02 [Lethan]: and less limbs.
2007-10-02 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wth... i wasnt trying to insult anyone... just goofing off like everyone else in here.. if it was an insult to anyone it was to the girl i barely attempted to imitate. if your high strung enough to see something so meaningless as an insult, perhaps you should seek some help on your mental status.... o.O
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: See...? ...now that insult was slightly better... here! ...have a cookie! ...just kidding... it's my cookie... *covets*
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: I couldnt tell yosh, I dont speak ICQ. :P


*Quick-draws a lazer gun and blasts Morts cookie to the 14th level of hell, which is reserved for bad cookies. Quietly wonders where I got a lazer gun while slowly putting it away*
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...curse you Dante! ...you and your fourteen levels of hell! ...including the bonus fifteenth level reserved for poor people!!
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, he's kinda a bastard. Watch out, Virgil, he's got a guitar!
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah, well... I got a gun. *shoots Dante*
2007-10-02 [Pillowthief]: Dont make him mad, Mort. He is a badass...


Not to mention a demon. Im going to hide over here while the world ends, if you dont mind.
2007-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...allright... call me if you need anythi- *gets brutally murdered*
2007-10-03 [nokaredes]: *points and laughs*
2007-10-03 [nokaredes]: *totally did not fix any typos* *shifty eyes*
2007-10-03 [Eloura]: *dies on bob's diner property and sue's bob diner*
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: *The chickens from The Legend of Zelda appear out of nowhere and attack the dead corpse of [Eloura], who is mysteriously trying to sue Bob's Diner from the beyond!*
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: *They also, as an afterthought, attack Nok for cleaning up their carefull planned mess*
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *they then fly to France to pick on some radom French guy*
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: *suc le blu!*


(obviously they attacked a Frenchman that doesnt know how to spell in french)
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *he, for some unknown reason, shouts, "menage a trois!" as he swats at them with a stereotypical large french breadstick*
2007-10-03 [Eloura]: *succeds in sueing bob's diner from beyond and owns bob's diner*
2007-10-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: did you know a senator sued god... trying to show how easy it was to file useless claims... but then... god responded to the suit o.O


2007-10-03 [Eloura]: *is waiting for people to notice the chane over in owners*
2007-10-03 [sunabozu]: *drops in* hm?
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: I assume the jury found in favor of the senator...?
2007-10-03 [sunabozu]: *drops little puppy on the ground*
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...either eat that puppy or put it back in the freezer! ...darn kids these days... wasting food...
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, seems Mort is still the owner. You'd have to wrestle the legal papers away from him...


Was wondering where that bard went to.
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts on wrestling outfit*... bring it, ghosty!
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: La lucha libre! Ai Ai Ai! *mexican fans appear from nowhere to cheer on The Fly*
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ¡CHUPALO! *body slams the ghost*
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: *cheer*
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs metal chair off the ground and slams it into the ghost's back*
2007-10-03 [Insaniac Yoshie]: they havent even tried the case yet..... there were two respones to the case.. one person acting on the 'WWJD' theory... and another that just appeared basically. ill post a link to the one of many article on it below. dont worry its barely a half a page long so you wont fry your brain if you look


http://ap.google.com/article/ALeqM5jqCsP7OChy5Q8AFcTeiB58cfy6Uw
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You dare to question my intelligence? Are you suggesting that I'm too ignorant a person to be able to comprehend more than half a page at a time? I take offense to that. I challenge you to a duel! *slaps you with a glove*... tomorrow... dawn... pistols... in the makeout shack. ...*eats ramen*... *forgets he's wrestling and gets suplexed by the ghost*
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: Wow. That guys going to burn in hell. But not the fourteenth level, no. He's not a cookie.
2007-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...as far as we know. He'll probably just burn in the ninth level reserved for lawyers, pirates, and puppets...
2007-10-03 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen-
2007-10-03 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2007-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *hiss*... *eats ramen*... *gets suplexed again*... darn it! ...must you people distract me?!
2007-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Chuck Norris can burn ants with a magnifying glass... at night.
2007-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
2007-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
2007-10-04 [Pillowthief]: This is what you were concentrating on? What are we paying you for?!?
2007-10-04 [nokaredes]: Who said we were paying him? Are we paying him? o_O And why do I always get attacked by stuff?
2007-10-04 [Pillowthief]: Dont blame me, I get told alot of stuff. Like how you're a guy.
2007-10-04 [Eloura]: *gostie gets the legal papers and had them signed* WHOOT!
2007-10-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: god this places attention span never ceases to amaze me lmao... xD
2007-10-04 [nokaredes]: How dare you insult our ooh shiny! *picks up a pen off the floor and starts playing with it*
2007-10-04 [Lethan]: oh look, a wall! oh look! a celing! ooh look, a taaaaable.....ooh look! (etc...)
2007-10-04 [Eloura]: *returns as a ghostie* Hiiiii
2007-10-04 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *starts inter wiki game of tag with eloura* mahahahaha i told ya id get you!! *tag your it and ya ccan only tag in one wiki at a time!
2007-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Lethandros, you liar! ...we don't have a wall... or a ceiling... and I think the termites ate that table...
2007-10-05 Turkey: Wassup, you two cent hoe bags?! ...*slaps random chick*...
2007-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...your mom's a two cent hoe bag! *eats ramen*...
2007-10-05 [Eloura]: *IS CONFUSED by Insaniac*
2007-10-05 [Insaniac Yoshie]: we all are.... even me....
2007-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... or if you're dyslexic ...*nemar stae*...
2007-10-07 [Pillowthief]: Ah, good, you guys weren't too bad this last weekend. I dont have to skip back 3 pages of comments to find out theres a new ninja bard or anything.
2007-10-07 [Lethan]: damn, then we obviously havent been doing our job right.
2007-10-07 [Pillowthief]: Its kinda refreshing that you guys weren't so... {-censored-} over this last weekend. Even if it was from lack of comments.
2007-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...we needs more comments darn it... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in*It's me not you back from Peru!
2007-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I assume Peru kicked you out...?
2007-10-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,I was joking,I've never been to Peru.
2007-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...so they wouldn't even let you in, huh? ...figures.
2007-10-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh shut it
2007-10-08 [Lethan]: er...*hides misty's stolen passport*
2007-10-08 [nokaredes]: Hey! You better not sell that to anyone on B's D-owned property!
2007-10-08 [Eloura]: *buys under the table* We must make B's D ALIVE!!
2007-10-08 [Insaniac Yoshie]: wait iv noticed something..... anyone here actually 'new' to B&Ds? i mean iv been here 3 or 4 years... sorta skipped out for a year.. but still... maybe thats why were makeing no profit... and haveing to steal the toilet paper from cheap hotels and gas stations....
2007-10-08 [Eloura]: i've been here a few months
2007-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... I'm pretty new too.
2007-10-08 [Pillowthief]: *cough*
2007-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *couch*
2007-10-08 [Lethan]: *sells couch*
2007-10-08 [Pillowthief]: Damnit, I meant *coug- wait.. I didnt... Hey! That's my couch!
2007-10-09 [nokaredes]: *buys couch*?
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: Give that back!
2007-10-09 [nokaredes]: ...I bought it, it's mine! *runs away with it*
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: *Is Indiana Jones!* *Uses multi-purpose whip to catch the unsuspecting legs of.... The couch! A smart yank leaves the bewildered Nok without her/his stolen property*
2007-10-09 [nokaredes]: *is still running*
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: Not surprising- everyone runs from Indian Jones, except Chuck Norris who just delivers bone crushing punches to his groin.
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: And roundhouse kicks to the face... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: Several of them, yes. (Which reminds me that being Indiana Jones isnt a good idea when Chuck Norris may be around) *Changes back into Bruce Wayne*
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Bruce Wayne, huh? ...*morphs into Bruce Lee*...
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: How interesting! My middle name is Lee...
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Huck huck hayuck... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: 
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: 
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you Chuck!
2007-10-09 [Insaniac Yoshie]: lol mort your not so new... so dont pretend to be... i remember your from befor i disappeared ^.^


coulda swore you were around befor i disappeared to el... maybe it was a diff wiki...
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: I have always been here
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I think there's a problem with your html... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-09 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen-
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... what?! ...*eats ramen*... that's all you ever say! ...*eats ramen*... *smacks wolfy*... *eats ramen*... get new material! ...*eats ramen*... don't you just hate it when people repeat stupid things...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...man, I love wikis like this... it really helps with my terminal boredom.


fuck the main stream
2007-10-09 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2007-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: This wiki is too frickin' big... I need to trim it... but I don't have any wikiclippers... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-10 [Pillowthief]: Got a blowtorch? They seem to work pretty well on slag.
2007-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah, but that'd end up burning down the whole wiki...
2007-10-10 [Pillowthief]: ...Probably needs it. Need some help keeping the patrons inside?
2007-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...who cares...? ...*torches the place*...
2007-10-10 [Pillowthief]: *Pushes screaming patrons back inside Bob's*
2007-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...be sure to bolt the door... *casually eats ramen*...
2007-10-10 [Pillowthief]: *Bolt to lock screaming Bob's Diners patrons inside is broken*
Say forget it and let them out
Hold door closed using physical force while the building burns down
Look around for alternate means of keeping burning patrons inside Bob's Diner
Hack and slash patrons coming out the door




*You find a metal bar*
Bash patrons coming out the door
Prop door open
Use it as a walking staff
Secure door




*You have successfully barricaded the screaming patrons of Bob's Diner inside the building*




2007-10-10 @Not logged in user@: *is only screaming patron to escape*
2007-10-10 [Eloura]: *giggles* That was me!
2007-10-10 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *had a comment but lost it*
2007-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *You are hungry*


Raid the 'fridge
Eat out of the garbage
Eat some ramen
Consume the corpses of B's D patrons




*You eat ramen*


*Congratulations. You have saved the world. Press Alt+F4 to play again*
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... I just read over this entire wiki! ...there are too many errors... I'm not even going to make an attempt to fix 'em... *reads through some past comments*...
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: Thats Noks job anyways. Make her do it!
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: But... didn't she just burn to death...?
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: Oh yeah. Forgot about that. *Eats charred Nok brains*
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Save me a slice... *munches on some white wolf brains*... needs more sauce...
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: I think we burned down all of the sauce, you're just going to have to do without.
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no sauce?!! ...NOOOOO!!! ...*jumps off cliff*...
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: *Eats smashed Mort brains*
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *brain bites back*
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: *Desides hes not that hungry any more*
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *brain crawls under a rock*
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: *Goes back to eating on more subservient brain- Noks*
2007-10-11 [Lethan]: hey! get that charred corpse of my seat! sheesh, i go away for a small amount of time, and corpses start to think they own the place.
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: *thinks about eating [Lethan]'s brain*
2007-10-11 [Lethan]: *thinks about his brain being eaten*
2007-10-11 [Eloura]: *eats brainthief's brain*
2007-10-11 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: I'm back, penguin, ok, dont hurt me
2007-10-11 [sunabozu]: hey hey hey ehey hey ehye hey hey
2007-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *hurts you anyway*... yo... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-11 [Pillowthief]: *Doesnt have brain* *Eats Lethandros' brain*
2007-10-12 [Eloura]: *steals brain from brainthief*
2007-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen like a normal person*...
2007-10-12 [Pillowthief]: *Eats Eloras brain, then steals brains back from her brainless corpse*
2007-10-12 [~And the wind calls her Demona~]: o.O; meow?
2007-10-12 [Pillowthief]: *Seriously thinks about eating more brains*
2007-10-12 [Eloura]: *laughs when he realises that wasn't my brain*
2007-10-12 [nokaredes]: Whose brain was it, then?
2007-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...a spare...?
2007-10-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2007-10-13 [nokaredes]: ...and what have B's D's patrons been doing that we have a spare brain?
2007-10-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you mean,spare brain
2007-10-13 [nokaredes]: No, I meant what I said.
2007-10-13 [Lethan]: theres a crate of them outside, i ordered them, you see.
2007-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You never know when you're going to need an extra brain... *eats brain ramen*... mmm... grey matter...
2007-10-13 [Lethan]: hey! get your own. i spent a good few hours diggi- er, i mean BUYING these brains.
2007-10-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-14 [nokaredes]: Oh man, my friend [Pedo pete] and I were in a graveyard the other day, and we saw a bunch of open graves... was that your doing?!
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: who me?
2007-10-14 [Eloura]: *gives out baskets of goodies bought from bob's diner suviner shop*
2007-10-14 [nokaredes]: No, I was talking to [Lethan]...
2007-10-14 [Eloura]: *pous*
2007-10-14 [nokaredes]: Eew, don't do that on the wiki, [Eloura]!
2007-10-14 [Eloura]: *tilts head confused* WHat pout?
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh
2007-10-14 [Eloura]: *is confused*
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: me too
2007-10-14 [nokaredes]: No, you poud! You're supposed to do that in the toilet, not on the wiki! >_<
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-14 [Eloura]: ?
2007-10-14 [Pillowthief]: Another weekend that you guys havent destroyed everything and no ninja bard showed up. Whats up with you guys? O.o
2007-10-14 [Lethan]: *holds up a flaming cat* sorry, we'll try harder.
2007-10-14 [Pillowthief]: *Flaming cat claws Lethandros, understandably*
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2007-10-14 [Pillowthief]: *Flaming cat claws Misty1, understandably*
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws water on the flaming cat*
2007-10-14 [Pillowthief]: *the charred, and now smelly wet cat, claws Misty1 some more*
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives the cat a bath with dove shampoo*
2007-10-14 [Pillowthief]: ... *The charred, and now not so smelly, wet cat claws Misty1 some more*
2007-10-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws the cat in a wood chipper*
2007-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you sick freak! ...how could you do that?!! ......you got cat blood all over my new wood chipper!! ...*eats ramen*... *throws away the wood chipper*...
2007-10-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: You could have washed it.
2007-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah, but washing requires time... and I don't have time to waste! ...*eats ramen*... Okay... now where were we...? ...Santa. You in or out? "I'll fold." ...alright... it's down to me, the Tooth Fairy, and Gandalf. Gandalf? ...*lays out cards*... "Full house."... hmm... good, good... Tooth Fairy? ...*shows cards to the table*... "Royal Flush." ...uh huh... not bad... and me? ...*reveals crudely forged cards*... Seven aces. I win! ...*takes all the chips*... *everyone gangs up on me*... *a scuffle ensues*...
2007-10-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: OMG!
2007-10-15 [nokaredes]: Why did you go to all that trouble to wash the cat, if you were just going to do that...? And why do we have a wood chipper, anyway? And why do I seem to ask why we have things a lot?
2007-10-15 [nokaredes]: ...and you could have made Misty-chan wash it...
2007-10-15 [nokaredes]: ...or at least pay for the new one...
2007-10-15 [Eloura]: Hey nok. You get bored alot don't you. *throws wood chippers at everyone still in the new packages*
2007-10-15 [Lethan]: *catches wood chipper with his face*
2007-10-15 [Eloura]: *trys not to laugh*
2007-10-15 [Insaniac Yoshie]: *sits in imaginary floating basket and watches from mid air*
2007-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses the new wood chipper in the closet with the rest of the wood chippers*
2007-10-15 [Lethan]: quite a collection of wood chippers you have there.
2007-10-15 [Eloura]: Very lovely they are *throws baskets of food and goodies at everyone*
2007-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -eats pen-
2007-10-15 [Eloura]: WHITE!!!!!!!!!!!!! * stares in horror* How can you eat that?
2007-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grins, picking pen out of her teeth- Hunger does that to a person...-burp-
2007-10-15 [Eloura]: So i see... but how could you ever be that hungery when i passed out food *pouts*
2007-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: sorry.. -sulk-
2007-10-15 [Eloura]: 333333333333333333333333333333366
2007-10-15 @Not logged in user@: I'm sorry i was joking hun *hands over half a cracker*
2007-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen in the dark*... I'm so depressed...
2007-10-15 [Lethan]: thats not ramen you're eating. you probably should'nt turn the light on now...
2007-10-15 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: What's wrong pen? -tackles-
2007-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...well... I'm almost out of ramen! ...*sobs*... *finishes off the bowl*... *fixes a new one*... ah... much better...
2007-10-15 [sunabozu]: i got new pics up tell me what you think
2007-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: They seem very... "picturesque". ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-16 [Eloura]: *steals all the ramen*
2007-10-16 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I think it's good picture calfrobe!
2007-10-17 [nokaredes]: ...why have there been no comments here today?! Did nobody have time to throw burning oil on Mortimer (*does this*) or sic the lions on Misty or even rebuild B's D?!
2007-10-17 [Lethan]: *sic's the lions on misty* good, ive helped out. now i dont have to help rebuild! mwa ha ha!
2007-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*burns*... *the ramen in my hands boils*...
2007-10-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in*Hello everyone.
2007-10-18 [Eloura]: *sets rabid squirrles to rebuild B's D* I did my part!
2007-10-19 [Lethan]: these rabid squirrels....definatly not rabid enough!
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: Sorry best i could find.
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats a squirrel*... nope... I only got a little bit of rabies from this one...
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: really rabid squierls were picked up by our competortors before i got any...
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you, Bill's Grill!! ...*shakes fist*...
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: *flamethroweds Bill's Grill and company*
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *Bill's Grill throws molotov cocktails at B's D*
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: *bloacks them with penguins serving bloody mary's*
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Since when have we had penguins here...? ...I hate penguins! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *waddles away in disgust*
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: *laughs and say's* These aren't REAL penguins there sheep in penguin clothing
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats veal ramen*... stinkin' sheep.
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: *eats deer ramen and pokes mort*
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*explodes*...
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: *is covered in ramen and bits of mort and continues eting her ramen*
2007-10-19 [Lethan]: ....you going to eat those mort chunks? if not, i'll have 'em.
2007-10-19 [Eloura]: I'll share!
2007-10-19 [Lethan]: hooray!
2007-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *a little sticker on one of the Mort chunks reads, "WARNING: Contains high levels of anthrax. Unless you're a vulture, avoid eating."*... *another Mort chunk eats ramen*...
2007-10-20 [Eloura]: *continues eating mort chunks* Yum!!
2007-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws a brick at the window*
2007-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...but... we don't have any windows...
2007-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: FINE!*throws a brick at a girl named window*
2007-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I don't recall having any bricks either... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: It was my brick.*window's mom came over and kicked at Misty but missed and kicked Mort*
2007-10-21 [Eloura]: *lsughs at mort*
2007-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *laughs too*... that'll teach that weirdo... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-21 [Eloura]: LOL! *eats all ramen*
2007-10-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ^_^
2007-10-21 [Eloura]: :::^_^:::
2007-10-21 [Pillowthief]: Ugh. Im too hungover to even think about making fun of Elora's lsugh...
2007-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *lsughs at eloura*... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-21 [Pillowthief]: Heh heh heh. Reminds me how funny harpooning is.
2007-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...of course... that's why we have a closet full of harpoons right over there...
2007-10-21 [Pillowthief]: ...Has anyone considered if she didnt actually misspell 'laugh'? What if 'Lsugh' is some kind of new way of slobbering on a victim before brutally punching them repeatedly in the groin?
2007-10-21 [Pillowthief]: *Harpoons some carefully picked...*cough* I mean, "random"... targets*
2007-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...arr... that be tha' white whale. O' course we can't attack that thar black whale, or it'd be a hate crime... *couch*... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the...?
2007-10-22 [nokaredes]: We're inventing our own internet slang in here today I see...
2007-10-22 [Pillowthief]: (I meant cough) ...crap.
2007-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...*eats ramen*... *couchs*...
2007-10-22 [Pillowthief]: Hopefully you didnt get that couch from me, I hear its deadly...
2007-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh great... You've infected me with a virus... now hackers can get in. ...*hackers climb into my nose*...
2007-10-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen-
2007-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it's another one! ...*beats Whitey upside the head with a frying pan*...
2007-10-23 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2007-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... You're undead. It should be "grahg!"
2007-10-23 [Pillowthief]: Oh yeah.
2007-10-23 [Pillowthief]: *Is Redead*
Grahg!
2007-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*... you work on that... I'm gonna go burn stuff.
2007-10-23 [Pillowthief]: Bob's is already in ashes- did that not satisfy your hunger for inflamation?
2007-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *burns the ashes*
2007-10-23 [Pillowthief]: *Harpoons a half burnt cutout figure*
2007-10-23 [Eloura]: *harpoons bob the ghost*
2007-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody said Bob was dead... *checks cage*... well... maybe he is dead...
2007-10-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn it... where's a good harpoon when you need one.
2007-10-25 [Pillowthief]: *Goes to pass Mort a harpoon from the bucket*
*Rethinks it and puts the harpoon back in the bucket*




*Gets bigger harpoon and passes it to Mort*
2007-10-25 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2007-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, thank you... *eats harpoon*... *throws ramen at misty*...
2007-10-25 [Pillowthief]: *Takes pictures*
2007-10-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *runs in*Please take my new poll,*runs out*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: SPAM
DX
Sorry =)


Oh wait we sorted that issue ;) Nm
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: *Harpoons the newcomer*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Spam?! ...darn Super Processed Armadillo Meat... *eats good old fashioned ramen instead*...
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and violate Duke Devlin*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: =O I was harpooned XD
Awesome.. *pokes it*
I was violated OO
Wowzers.
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: *Spams the newly violated and harpooned [Duke Devlin]*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Darn >< I've been spammed, violated and harpooned all at once.
How will I live? DX
*throws stale bread at [Pillowthief]* =)
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: *Is hit with stale bread x2*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Bwahaa No ;) I deleted the comment XD
But if you would like *throws another loaf at you* XD
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kicks [Duke Devlin] in the face*NO TOUCHING PILLOWTHIEF,WITH BREAD OR ANY PART OF YOUR BODY!!
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Grow up Misty. Guess what? It's not real dipshite.
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: FUCK OFF JACKASS!
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh? What reason is there to call me 'JACKASS' this time? *sigh*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oooh, and if you are so protective of Pillowthief, why do you not have a relation? ;)
*puts a hand on pillowthief's shoulder* Ooo does it burn Misty?
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws more ramen on misty*... I would tell you to cool down, but that ramen was boiling.
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *twitches*Maybe you should watch this.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ox0c_1l9al4
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: *laughs* Bwaha Nice shot.
Nice joke *laughs again*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*rats crawl on misty*... *health inspector bursts in*... *the door breaks off behind him*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo I am simply dying in fear of your spam.
Also you should get that twitch checked out ;) Could be a bug.
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Nevermind, the rats got it XD
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: "Are those rats on that customer?!" ...no! I swear! ...she's not a customer! ...she just lives out back in the outhouse... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: He speaks the truth I tell ya. *watches you eat ramen* ^^
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills the rats*Whatever.
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha Like you could kill that many rats. *shakes head*
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: SHUT IT!
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the cockroaches swarm in onto misty*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Why yes I will, thankyou for reminding me.. *closes the broken door* That's better. OOO cockroaches ^^
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you remember? ...the door fell off. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Exactly. I leant it back up, thus closing it *winks* You see ;)
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sprays the cockroaches with cockroach killer*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Now where did you get that? *sigh* At least stamp on them..
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: FINE!*stomps on them*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Good. At least we can be sure that they die.. *throws stale bread at Misty*
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *ducks and the bread hits Mort*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: I would never let bread hit Mort ;) He is not behind you XP
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...stale bread? ...are you trying to say that this diner is anything other than proper and high class? ...*throws bread at an opossum*... shoo! ...dern vermits! ...*shoots randomly with a shotgun*... *hitches up overalls*...
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *is bread*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: I always bring a few spare loaves of Stale Bread ;) So no, the opossum will not be bothered by any signs of substandard food ;)
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever.
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Is Bread?! =O ZOMFG
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Kudos on that great reply Misty. No one could have said it better. Here *throws a slice of stale bread to you* Congratulations. -_¬
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the seagulls attack again*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: =O *in awe* Ooo Seagulls =O
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *they get attacked by the chickens*... *a scuffle ensues*...
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: OMFG!
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo A scuffle =O *amused* Yes yes quite OMFG, yes.. You say something sensible..
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever,I have to go,night BITCHES!
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Night 'Ho-Bag =)
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Peace out, you two-cent whore! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ho-Bag??Whatever night Mort,say hi to Turkey for me.Peace!  
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: NOT THE CHICKENS FROM The Legend of Zelda!!!!
Noooooooooo!
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: Anger in my absence. Wish I could delete comments :(
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh I'd better be going to, it's nearly four am, I only really stayed on because I was irritating Whats-Her-Shit XD
Goodnight Mr. Mort, I bid you adeu *bows with a flourish*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the chickens swarm on the re-dead pillowthief*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Later, sucka'... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: It wasn't realy anger; at least not on my part; you'd have to ask Her. *shrugs*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah... too much work.
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: a BUH BYE..
And yehhsss too much work for ye
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: Stupid bitches, dont you know that me and Mort are the only ones that can make fun of people arounf here? Well, its actually just Mort.


And what do you mean ask Misty1? You started it non-Devlin.
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't help but to make fun of Misty... it's just so fun!
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm watching some court show... the defendant just used the word "like" five times in a sentence. He should have got a lawyer...
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: Ouch. He definately, like, should have gotten, like, a lawyer or something.
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Like, totally. He, like, lost and had to pay, like, $1,500 in damages.
2007-10-26 [Pillowthief]: On top of looking like a complete idiot on national television. Bummer.
2007-10-26 [Lethan]: Damnit all, cant a guy have a meal in PEACE? *chomps breadsticks not made of bread*
2007-10-26 [Eloura]: *eats the breadstick not made of bread*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: I only pick on her because she is nothing but mean to me ;) So it's only fair, get it? XP
Ahh but I didn't start it XD See?
01:48:54 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): *kicks [Duke Devlin] in the face*NO TOUCHING PILLOWTHIEF,WITH BREAD OR ANY PART OF YOUR BODY!!
^ First thing she said oO So I must have started it XP
2007-10-26 [Eloura]: OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Nice breadstick =)
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Those aren't breadsticks! ...that's part of the wall! ...darn you people... literally eating me out of house and home... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I make fun of Misty because it's just so fun... I've been at it for two years now.
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: It must be very fun then XP Maybe I'll continue XP
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws glass at Misty*
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: =O That's scary! Where'd ya get that glass? =O
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...from the food... *picks more out and throws it at Misty*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh I see *smiles and leans on a counter* Having fun throwin glass?
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: No... but I have a contract with the glass company... if I don't throw an average of 100 pounds of glass a year I get fired... *throws glass*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Darn. That sucks. Wanna throw glass at glass? *raised eyebrow*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *glances around*... *eats some glass*... You didn't see nothin'.
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: *nods* Sure thing. *looks away all non-chalant*
2007-10-26 [Sir Soapy]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo two Ramen eating peoples ^^
2007-10-26 [Sir Soapy]: Nope... just one. This here's my original house... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Sir Soapy]: I haven't been on this username for a long ******* time! ...Look at all those [Sagacious Turkey] updates! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Sir Soapy]: 
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Wowzers OO So you are really Mort? ;)
Clever XP
Maybe I will just become my other account for a second XP
2007-10-26 [Motionless]: Bwahhahahahaha!!! *runs in and throws stale bread at Sir Soapy; the other MOrt* =O *runs away again*
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what's this? ...I nothing nothing of a "sir soapy"... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: DX You are lovely and confusing =X
Would've worked if I hadn't seen your username in the login list XP
2007-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet you! ...*sends the lions after you*...
2007-10-26 [Duke Devlin]: Dayum. *hides* DX You and your name changes ;)
2007-10-27 [Eloura]: O.O nc-17 different for a name O.o
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: If it means what I think it does, then WOO =D Android 17? Looks the same ><
2007-10-27 [Eloura]: okkkkkkk *eats ramen*
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am back people!
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Good for you =X
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm sorry you are???
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: How very mture Misty. Once again you prove your great prowess over all.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm sorry,I have no clue who you are.*reads my book*
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Good for you ;) *reads her own book*
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I wonder where Mort is?
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Disappeared a while ago.
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: He choked on some ramen and died... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo you came back ^^ Really well timed..
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Just like I planned... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-27 [Lethan]: very well timed...*eats notbreadstick*
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Well.., well done ;)
2007-10-27 [Lethan]: very interesting conversation you're making here misty. You could write a book on it...
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Hehe well played.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh haha very funny.*reads my book*
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...must you eat my walls?! ...here... have some ceiling. *throws a chunck of ceiling at you*...
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Whatcha reeeeaaadin'?
2007-10-27 [Lethan]: *eats celingstick*
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm reading "1001 Ways To Kill Penguins" It is very intresting
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Oh good for you.
You know you are unbearably immature Misty.
And no everyone, I am not referring to her book choice.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What do you mean?
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! ...I wrote that book.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh really??Well it is very good.
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I wonder where that stinkin' pillow stealer is...
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who knows.
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes, play innocent.
She sent a harrassing message. Sad Misty, I hope you grow up.
And good for you 17.., I shall call you 17 now XD, You should write another ;)
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *signs misty's book*... "I hate you. Stop following me. Hatefully Yours, Mortified Penguin"
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn Cell... trying to eat me.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey,I was reading that,and how can I follow you when I'm in Florida,and honestly I have no idea what you are talking about Duke Devlin
2007-10-27 [Lethan]: *eats unidentifiedstick while having to work as slave labour in the printing press for the books*
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuure you're in Florida... *eats ramen*...
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *whips lethandros*... did I say you could take a break?! ...you can eat some dry wall after you finish digging that well! ...*whips you again*...
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: You are a complete liar Misty -__-
So anyyyy way =) Hows the business MorT?
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, as soon as Lethandros finishes that well we can get to work! ...*whips Leth*...
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Hey I need a job. Can I work for ya? *big grin*
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not lying.
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha right.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not.
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure... we need a good helper for the vice co-assistant dust inspecter's supporter's subordinate.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *reads a new book*
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]:    <== Click and ENLARGE Miss Misty ;)
Sounds simply fascinating ;) Please.., tell me more,
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What is that??Who is this Misty you speak of?
2007-10-27 [Lethan]: *replaces printing press ink with discarded shoes for revenge*
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Oh I do appologise [~Crimson Angel~] I meant >>
Anyway.
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Lethandros... why are there shoes on my paper? ...and why isn't that well done yet?! ...*beats misty for no particular reason*...
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...?  
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Llalaaalala
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]:   I am leaving I will return tomorrow.
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Like heck you will... *locks the doors*...
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: So.., how is everyone today at this here diner of Bob's?
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is beside Duke Devlin*Hi everyone.
2007-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Shh! ...what's that...? ...*noises arise on the roof*... ******* Kringles! ...*gets the shotgun*... you're not getting in this time! ...I'll be right back.
2007-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.
2007-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: See ya soon..
2007-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.
2007-10-28 [Duke Devlin]: Not you XP Mort ;)
I am msging you XP
2007-10-28 [Pillowthief]: Blarg. Forget it, Im not even commenting on this weekends lastest tirade of comments.
2007-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: why?
2007-10-28 [Pillowthief]: Because we have 3 Morts, people are chewing on the building, non-Devlin is making fun of you hardcore, you're not being nice either, and thankfully no ninja bards.
2007-10-28 [Pillowthief]: 4 pages of nothing.
2007-10-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmm...she stoped,and mort is mort,and i'm so bored right now.
2007-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *kills Misty... once and for all*
2007-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-10-29 [Eloura]: *steals morts ramen*
2007-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *buries you alive*
2007-10-29 [Duke Devlin]: Hehe I didn't mean to be mean ;) She was doing the same elsewhere ya see ;)
I will stop forever =D
Maybe just gentle teasing? XP
2007-10-29 [Lethan]: mmm, oh yes, thats gooood table...*gawns on it* id order some more if i were you.
2007-10-29 [Pillowthief]: *takes pictures of Lethandros "gawning" the table* Man! They're never going to believe this stuff back home!
2007-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *enlarges one of the pictures and frames it on the wall*
2007-10-30 [Pillowthief]: *click* *clink* *click* Can you believe this? They do it right out in public and everything. *click* *click* I going to sell these on ebay...
2007-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: http://cgi.ebay.com/EVERYBODY-LOVES-RAMEN-noodles-cookbook-RECIPES_W0QQitemZ290174138975QQihZ019QQcategoryZ378QQssPageNameZWDVWQQrdZ1QQcmdZViewItem ...good ol' eBay.
2007-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*listens to cheaptrick for some reason*...
2007-10-30 [Eloura]: *pulls self out of dirt stretches brushes dirt off and say's* OOOOOO RAMEN!!
2007-10-30 [Pillowthief]: Damn. Thought we had killed you. (Where'd those harpoons go?)
2007-10-30 [Duke Devlin]: NIfty book OO Not Harpoons DX *runs away just in case OO*
2007-10-30 [Eloura]: *laughs* No you buried me alive *smirks and has all the new harpoons beside her* Yum! *eats bob's diner and people in it*
2007-10-30 [Lethan]: hey! the people, fine, but eating BD's is MY job! *starts chewing his way out*
2007-10-31 [Eloura]: *ends up bringing up BD's because some grumbling her her stomac * Huh???
2007-10-31 [nokaredes]: ...how long was I gone? I thougt I was gone for a long time, but there aren't enough comments for that...
2007-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course there aren't enough comments! ...you left, you jerk! ...*slaps nokaredes with a white glove*... sir, I challenge you to a duel.
2007-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...It's Halloween! ...*children approach a seemingly haunted house*... Darn youngens! ...git off ma' lawn! ...*shoots at them*...
2007-10-31 [Pillowthief]: *Runs screaming away from the house*
2007-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *hurls molotov cocktails at the children*
2007-10-31 [Pillowthief]: *avoids flaming bits of children*
2007-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *gathers up a few children into a sack*... Michael Jackson will pay good money for these... *ships them in a crate to the Neverland Ranch*
2007-10-31 [Pillowthief]: *cant stop screaming while trying to rip a hole in the burlap sack*
2007-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn squeaky sack! ...*kicks it*... they just don't make 'em like they used to...
2007-11-01 [Eloura]: *laughs* Boy am i glad i not a kid anymore and ish older that 10! *giggles and hides anyway*
2007-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: If I ever decide to go trick-or-treating again, I'm going to mug the people and get their candy and their watches...
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: Good plan >> If they have watches, they shouldn't be begging for their candy XP
HAHA Just kidding Kiddies XP
I am not allowed to trick-or-treat =(
2007-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Court order?
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: Hahah I wish it was that nifty XP
Nah my Mum and Dad don't let me, or my brothers and sister, because they say its begging and disgusting >>
Silly people
2007-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it's not just begging... it's begging for candy.
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: I know =O Candy is great =D
It's ridiculous how they are ><
That and how bad it gets over here at night..., lots of bad stuff, people get attacked, raped, jumped, murdered (very true) commit suicide.., all of these have happened near me in recent months -____-
2007-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sounds fun... all we ever get around here is tractor related deaths... *hitches up overalls*... yup...
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: Darn I want tractor related deaths XP
*pulls your overalls back to where they were* XP Hahah.
2007-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Overalls...? ...what overalls? ...I'm not wearing any overalls... *hitches up overalls*... we sometimes get some town stonings when a woman commits an infidelity...
2007-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and there was that one witch we burned last month...
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: Oh really ;) Terrible that XP Where did you overalls go? I don't know =O *shakes head smiling* What about if she talks too much?
2007-11-01 [Pillowthief]: We stopped burning witches over here, it got boring. We now burn Amish and Mormons, they always seem to die with surprised looks on their faces. Possibly because their religions are only like 200 years old? You got to wonder what happened to all the people before their religions got started- were they all screwed? Straight to hell, dont pass GO, dont collect $200? That would suck to get born then.


Then you have to think about it... It was like that for all religions. What if we were born in that time, that time is now and the True Religion (the only one that lets you into heaven, since each religion believes that they're the only ones going) hasnt even been started?


...And thats why we burn Amish and Mormons. Yes, we're probably going to hell. The enjoyment is worth it.
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: Now damn that was deep OO I like it ;)
Yes, I agree with you on the last point, it seems really strange huh? I disagree alot with religion, but I am so unsure about the existence of aGod etc.. >>
BUt yes, burning people. Much more fun to burn Mormons and the Amish ;) They are technaphobes anyway XD
2007-11-01 [Pillowthief]: Mormons arent, they just spread like a virus.












All veiwpoints and opinions on Religion, Sex, or Politics are expressed with utmost sarcasm
and disbelief at whichever pitiful standing you are attacking me from.
2007-11-01 [Duke Devlin]: Nah I meant the Amish ;)
Haha virus XD Funny thoughts..
2007-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Pillowthief... this is an intervention... *everyone gathers around*... you keep going on about how fun it is to burn Mormons... when in reality, you've actually been burning your own fellow pirates... but don't worry... we're here to help you.
2007-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello everyone,how is everyone?
2007-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... Misty's here to molest you, but the rest of us are here to help you...
2007-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't Molest people,I only Molest Turkey
2007-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: How disturbing of you... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: Ewwww beasttttyyyy XP Lol jk
2007-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: no,I was talking about [The Bad Turkey],not the Turkey as in the animal.
2007-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: I know you were XP It was a joke.
2007-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,ok.
2007-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: Yarr see XP
2007-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: How are you?
2007-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: Fine. Tired. Doing homework..
2007-11-02 [Pillowthief]: Good thing theres not too many Mormons around here, otherwise I would have been kicked out of POTC. We did get the Amish though?
2007-11-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes, ;)
2007-11-02 [Eloura]: *walks in pouting*
2007-11-02 [sunabozu]: send me friend requests now!!!!!
2007-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...whadufxup?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: *walks in SMOUTING* XP
2007-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in naked*... wait... did I ever walk out...?
2007-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: No you did not OO Wow.., you are magic XD
2007-11-03 [Pillowthief]: *Burn the newcomer!*
2007-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: XD Me? Or [sunabozu]? =O
2007-11-03 [Pillowthief]: Hmm. Good question. How about we harpoon you, *harpoons non-Devlin* and we burn [sunabozu]? He might be amish...
2007-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh I am harpooned again >< Oh well.., I'm used to it now.. *pokes Pillowtheif* .. Yes, he may be Amish >>
2007-11-03 [Pillowthief]: Are you Amish 0.o?
2007-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: Oh no, not at all. Indeed, I am not even religious OO
2007-11-03 [Pillowthief]: Heritic! Throw stoooones!
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Noo! *ducks* DX
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: Stoooooooooones!




Which kinda makes me hungry for scones. And tea.
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: DAMN. Now you made me hungry for them too >>
I love scones & tea ^^
2007-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I only drink tea because I live down south... what's your excuse?!
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: I am British >>
Hahah best excuse XP
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: Racists. I just like tea.
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Hehe I just like tea too.
But generally, British people are seen to drink it more ;)
2007-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: HI ALL!
2007-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Please... the south so drinks more tea than the British...
2007-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: http://a537.ac-images.myspacecdn.com/images01/14/l_7fcbf1f4e477e91bf8b5738f263fd0e0.jpg
Proof that me and Turkey are separate people... and also pimps.
2007-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmm...ok
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Haha unlikely Mort ;) I drink masses of tea personally, but you can drink as much as you like oO Hahah XP
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: PIMPS. Which is which?
2007-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Take a guess...
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: I don't know DX
2007-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: the one next to the girl is Turkey,and the other is Mort,I think.
2007-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I should slap you, misty... Haven't you noticed that I often times speak in Spanish... and sometimes claim that I'm Mexican...? ...well... that's because... I'm frickin' Mexican! ...*eats ramen... with HOT SAUCE*...
2007-11-04 [Eloura]: I think tea rocks!!!!!!!
2007-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh,sorry.  
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ramen with Hot sauce eh? ... Have to try that...
2007-11-04 [nokaredes]: Why does Turkey have one dollar bills? Pimps are supposed to have 100$ and strippers are supposed to have 1$...
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Maybe Turkey didn't want his money stolen! =O By rogue thieves.. >>
2007-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Or maybe business wasn't too good... seeing as how there's only one ho in the picture...
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh, maybe so =O
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: Ninja Pimps? Heh, good PirateComputer3212...
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ninja Pimps eh? =O
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: They have to be, PirateComputer3212 has blocked their picture. Soon it may have to engage its security measures and call Chuck Norris...
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Damn I haff been confused ><
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: You see, my work computer blocks alot of things, internet pages mostly. Over time, I began to realize there must be a reason why it likes some pages and why it doesnt like others...


I soon figured out that I was unable to view anything "ninja-y" while on the other hand I was able to view "pirate-y" things. I aptly named the beautiful machine PirateComputer3212. Knowing that its security may be attacked by jealous ninjas in the future who wants its secrets, I wrote a program that lets PirateComputer3212 call Chuck Norris whenever its in trouble. I love my computer, when I was finished it even calculated the most likely location of Chuck Norris at any given time in a nifty pie chart.



2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: I like the odds of Chuck Norris being in Asia beating up Ninjas.. =D
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: There is alot of asians in Asia... Therefor ninjas. And dont forget about Cobra Commanders Super Secret Ninja Base...
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Yes, I had worked that out, for I am clever ;) Asian Ninjas!!
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: Racist. *drinks his imported tea and crumpets*
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: I am not ;) *drinks HER tea and EATS her scones* XP
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: *has his way with his tea and crumpets. At the same time*
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo well good for you >> XP *is now drinking HOt Chocolate* <3
2007-11-04 [Pillowthief]: Hmm. Hoe-t chocolate isnt one of my favorites.
2007-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Is one of mine ;) Even with the Hoe XP
2007-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I think Turkey and Mort look cute in that picture.
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *turns misty on mute*... much better.
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Strange... my computer's graph came out a little different...
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2007-11-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: *turns mute off,and can talk now*HEY WTF?! I DON'T SEE CHUCK NORRIS!
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That's because the few people who actually do get to see Chuck Norris don't live to tell about it...
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: *is so lost she hides*
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: He is behind you Misty..., Always behind you..., that's why you don't see him XP
2007-11-05 [sunabozu]: hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi 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hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hihi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi hi
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Please delete that comment Mort DX That was TERRIBLY immature >> And irritating/painful on the eyes DX
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: Agreed on painful O.o o.O
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: DX Seriously, it's horrible XD
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: Very. I agree. It's very painful on the eyes. I just don't know what is the obsession with it *says innocently* Not. I guess i've gotten into dot wars like that lo.
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: WTF? DX Oh right.., its terrible >>
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: Huh???? *eats ramen and drink oragne drink*
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Oh No..., Ramen eaters! DX XP Jk XP *eats BREAD that isn't STALE*
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: UHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *eats a blood stick*
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Oh no! DX
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: *grins and offers you a whatever flavor you want stick*
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Mmmm a LEMON FLAVOUR STICK =D
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: *hands you a lovely lemon flavored stick*
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: YAY ^^ *chomps the Lemon Flavoured stick* ^^
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: WEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *grins and chews on blood stick*
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: ^^
2007-11-05 [Eloura]: :::^_^:::
2007-11-05 [Pillowthief]: Brilliant [sunabozu]! You have made a 3d image that is magical! If you stare at it long enough you will see....


Oh, wait. No, Im blind. All of the "i"s got jealous of my eyes and seems to have poked them out.
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Exactly DX We all have no eyes =O
2007-11-05 [sara(:]: Bah, humbug.
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Awhh don't you like them? XP
2007-11-05 [Pillowthief]: Another Amish! Burn her!!!
2007-11-05 [sara(:]: Amish? x.x
2007-11-05 [Pillowthief]: I mean... Welcome to Bobs. << >> <<
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Haha Yes.. Welcome >=)
2007-11-05 [Pillowthief]: (She could be Mormon...maybe. Why cant we just burn her really quick without making accusations, then tell eveybody it was justified?)
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *deletes nothing*... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...[sara(:]?!! ...you're alive?!
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: (I agree... Burn her, destroying all evidence of her existence, so no accusations could be made?)
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*points at the sign on the wall*... "No All-Caps followed by a question mark."... *lights [Duke Devlin] on fire*...
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: DX I repent!! I am sorry DX *takes back the caps >>*
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at the other sign*... "No repenting!"... *burns you some more*... you may only repent in the outhouse/make-out shack.
2007-11-05 [Duke Devlin]: Sorry >< *disappears to the outhouse*
2007-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: "bob's makeout shack"
2007-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: There ;)
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: Did I miss a Comment Deleting? No....... You really need to tell me before you do that.
2007-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...We have a full schedule in the lobby if you want to know about deletings beforehand...
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: Good. I will do that. (I love seeing other peoples pain and humiliation! *Sqeee!*)
2007-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: (Pain & Humiliation you say? *done with the repenting ;)* XD
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: Yup. Its kinda like harpooning someone. It hurts for a while, then just becomes humiliating. I think is funny.
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: *Harpoons non-Devlin*
2007-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and surround [Pillowthief]!*
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: *Slowly, from his pocket, takes out the... Chickens from The Legend of Zelda! They scream wildly and attack the first thing they see! They attack Misty!*
2007-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the lions huddle and begin discussing a game plan*... *the chickens use this opportunity to attack the lions*... *the ref calls a fowl on the chickens!*
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: *Misty attacks the ref!*
2007-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the ref throws misty out the window!*
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: *Misty is now undead!*
2007-11-06 [Pillowthief]: (Dog food = lion food?)
2007-11-06 [Eloura]: *giggles poking peoples and eats ramen*
2007-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: *watching, petting her stale bread* .. I was harpooned XD
2007-11-07 [nokaredes]: ...does anyone here even notice when I'm gone for a long time?
2007-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: (Dog food = Salesmen)
2007-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah, you jerk! ...the comment average decreases! ...now... make some nonsensical comments!
2007-11-07 [nokaredes]: I'm not good at nonsensical. I think I may have grown out of it...
2007-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...then... some sensical, perhaps?
2007-11-07 [Pillowthief]: You were gone?
2007-11-07 [Duke Devlin]: Write sensical nonsensicle. That makes sense ;)
2007-11-07 [Eloura]: *giggles drinking an energy drink named full throtal*
2007-11-07 [sunabozu]: IM A BOY YEEEHAAAA!!!!!!!
2007-11-07 [Eloura]: okkkkkkkkkkkk
2007-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions drag [sunabozu] into the streets and castrate him*... man... it's been a long time since they've done that...
2007-11-07 [Pillowthief]: Not since Misty...
2007-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heh... she used to be Mister... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-08 [Pillowthief]: ...Damn lions and their castrations.
2007-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the lions heard that!*...
2007-11-08 [Pillowthief]: *eeep!*
2007-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *the lions dive at you! ...but somehow land on Misty!*... *they castrate her even more*...
2007-11-08 [Pillowthief]: Eew, 2x castration. Pwnd.
2007-11-08 [nokaredes]: Hey, don't be mean to Misty! She just had a birthday!
2007-11-08 [nokaredes]: (And congratulations on not dying anytime in the past year, too, Misty!)
2007-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *Misty suddenly explodes into a fine mist*... ha! ...mist.
2007-11-08 [Pillowthief]: What have you done?!? Now the Mist monsters will spawn and eat us.
2007-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you, Hollywood! ...*shakes fist at the sky*...
2007-11-08 [Pillowthief]: You too Squaresoft! *shakes fist for not remaking FF7*
2007-11-08 [Duke Devlin]: DX Mist monsters! DX >> SquareEnix now DX Ugly name XP
2007-11-08 [Eloura]: *hides not wanting to be blown up*
2007-11-08 [Pillowthief]: *This is my hiding spot! Hide somewhere else!*
2007-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *remakes FF7 himself*
2007-11-08 [Duke Devlin]: =O You must show me when you do this ;) *laughs*
2007-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: The only problem is, the game explodes when you try to move... it's only a minor problem though... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-09 [Eloura]: *watches finding new hiding space*
2007-11-09 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh keep the bug ;) Challenge XD I plan to make a game where you cannot heal or save, and many others things... seriously XD
2007-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Sounds fun... needs some cheats though...
2007-11-09 Turkey: S'up hoe bags?!!
2007-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: So, if you're in the final level and you accidentally fall, does it make a sound?!...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Eh, what was that, Turk?!
2007-11-09 Turkey: ...Only if Chuck Norris says so! ...castores! *high fives*
2007-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I gots to go, son!
2007-11-09 Turkey: ...say what, ho?!
2007-11-09 Turkey: ...what?!!?!!! No you doesn't!
2007-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... peace, ho!
2007-11-10 [Duke Devlin]: Ah.., 1) yeh you would need cheats ;)
2) Nah.., you'd mute it. Thus no sound ;)
2007-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*tries to play his own game*... *explodes*...
2007-11-10 [Duke Devlin]: Damn.. That'll be messy to clean up.. *shakes head* ... Mop? *looks around*
2007-11-11 [Pillowthief]: At Bob's? I wouldnt trust it. He's probably cleaner sitting right where he is. All over the walls.


Still havent figured out how you get on here Turk. Do you ever say hello to the guards when you're here?
2007-11-11 [Duke Devlin]: Damn. Yeh I'll leave that then.. cordon it off or something..
--Make a new account? XD WIth a diff email? ;)
2007-11-11 [Pillowthief]: And leave your spam for someone else to clean up? Absurd!
2007-11-11 [Duke Devlin]: Spam? I spam no one ;) I would clean, get me a decent broom XP
Or he leave spam? XD
2007-11-11 [Pillowthief]: Spam. Reminds me of Spa'am off of the Muppets Treasure Island, which makes me think of bacon. God Im hungry.
2007-11-11 [Duke Devlin]: Aren't we all?
No, I just ate a roast dinner.. XP
2007-11-11 [Pillowthief]: ...I hate you.
2007-11-11 [Duke Devlin]: I'm sorry =( If it helps.., I was exiled to the sofa, cause there wasn't enough chairs at the tables =( Bastards..
2007-11-11 [Pillowthief]: Ugh. Full. Triple burger with bacon and ranch. Yum.
2007-11-11 [Duke Devlin]: Yumtastic ^^ I hope you enjoyed that ;)
2007-11-11 [Pillowthief]: It kinda tasted more like french onion dip than ranch, but at that point I didnt care.
2007-11-11 [Duke Devlin]: Weird that.. I have only ever had 'ranch dip' once =( It was yummy =D Weird that it tasted like french onion though >>
2007-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you know... we are in a diner... not a good one, but it's still a diner... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: I am aware ;)
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: ohh my i missd much.
2007-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no you didn't! *lions eat you*
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Yes you did >=( >> Hehe XP
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: *laughs as the lions missed me and ate devlin*
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: You can't change the direction of Mort's lions >> I get eaten by nothing, since my name is Duke Devlin XP
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: I didn't change there direction and devlin is my friend (was standing behind me at time of lion attack) :P
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Oh really? You can't use the name Devlin! I own that now >> xp
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: How do you own that??? *points to lion that ate her friend*
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: I bought it from the world owner XP
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: Then what is my friend devlin to do?
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Change his name.. *shakes head laughing loudly* =D
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: But but BUT!!!! I can't
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: YOu can't? He can't? He will >=O
=D
Di! Ecce hora! Uxor mea me necabit!
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: He won't!!!! 


(ummm err whats that all mean?)
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Oh well. *shrugs* I can't be bothered to argue XD
It means, in Latin, 'God, look at the time! My wife will kill me!" =D
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: LOL!!!!!!! *giggles*
Now that's a good one!!!! LOL :D
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Hehe XD
I know XD Here's an even better one; "Braccae tuae aperiuntur.."
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: *raises eyebrow curiosly* And what does that one mean?
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Your fly's are undone! XD
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: *laughs* Now THAT'S good!!!
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: I know ;) It is VERY good xD
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: *smirks* I see "Braccae tuae aperiuntur"
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Haha XD Nope. I have no fly's. Only buttons XP
Me transmitte sursum, Caledoni!
2007-11-12 [Eloura]: OPPPPsss!!!!!!! Maybe it was that tree O.o
What's thay mean?
2007-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh, probably was.. =O
Beam me up, Scottie XD
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Death to Star Trek! ...*kills Leonard Nemoy*...
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2007-11-13 [Pillowthief]: ...
2007-11-13 [nokaredes]: I like how it was Leonard Nimoy who was on Star Trek... and not who you said...
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ......NERD!! ...*the lions tackle Nokaredes*...
2007-11-13 [Pillowthief]: *The chickens from The Legend of Zelda attack Nokaredes!*
2007-11-13 [nokaredes]: Hey! The term for people who know too much about Star Trek is geek! Or Trekkie! Not nerd... I'm so offended.
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *Chuck Norris attacks Nokaredes! ...and soon after attacks Misty some more*
2007-11-13 [Pillowthief]: *The chickens from The Legend of Zelda peck Nokaredes eyes out!*
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hey! I just mopped that floor! ......ha ha haa! ...just kidding.
2007-11-13 [nokaredes]: ...aww... I liked those eyes... oh well, I suppose there's nothing for it... *grows new eyes... in a jar!*
2007-11-13 [Pillowthief]: Not fair. All I have is a half bald chia pet.






ChaChaCha Chia!
2007-11-13 [Duke Devlin]: Anyone noticed that Misty hasn't been around in a while? 00
And You mopped the floor? You were the mess, you and your exploded body.. *shakes head at Mort*
2007-11-13 [Eloura]: (i liked the beam be up scottie thats really good!) Yea i noticed... hmmmm mort did ja mop cause sometin' to do with misty?
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*urge to kill rising*...
2007-11-13 [Duke Devlin]: Oh well. Weird but I'm sure we will live 00 XD
Don't kill anyone MOrt ;)
2007-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *kills some random Asian kid*
2007-11-13 [Duke Devlin]: Racism >< Terrible Mort, terrible. XP
2007-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...fine... *kills a child of every race*...
2007-11-14 [nokaredes]: ...isn't that still two Asian kids, then?
2007-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yes... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-14 [Pillowthief]: Chuck Norris has killed millions. Helps keep the population down.
2007-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...good thing he's in Asia right now... they were getting out of control... maybe he'll do to them what he did to the dinosaurs... or the Persian empire...
2007-11-14 [Pillowthief]: I understand about the Persians, but why the gardens of Babylon?
2007-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...he ate 'em... as a salad...
2007-11-14 [Duke Devlin]: Mmmm salad..
2007-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heh... heh heh... "salad"... sicko.
2007-11-14 [Duke Devlin]: oO Oh yes ;) salad... *grins* Nah.., we all prefer meeeeeeeeatttttttyyyyyyyy meat.
2007-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...your mom prefers meat! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-15 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh, rare meat. XP Your mum is a terrible insult XD
2007-11-15 [Eloura]: *eats shrimp ramen and watches the guys fight*
2007-11-15 [sunabozu]: hey
2007-11-15 [Duke Devlin]: Guys? =O I'll have you know.. >> *rambles off about how I am female* >>
2007-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...prove it! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Look at my house ;) I am female ;.; <3
I am too girly to be male.. unless I am a very camp emo-ey male XD Classic.
No I am a girl. I love yaoi, gay guys and lovey stuff too much. Wow, how cliché and sexist am I? XD
2007-11-16 [Pillowthief]: *The owner of SHU laughs and points at the Cyber Stalker section of his wiki*
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *the owner of Hitmen United eats ramen*
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Lucky for you XP
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...B's D has been viewed nearly 500 times since yesterday?!
2007-11-16 [Pillowthief]: Non-Devlin could actually be... Devlin!
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*audience gasps*...
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: =O *gasp* Oh my Lordy lord. =O
All secrets will be revealed in the next exciting episode of 'Bob's Diner: When Pillows and Penguins run amok'.
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nooo... it's, As We Speak...
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Oh sorry, my bad ;) I'm new you see, just hired. Fresh outta Narrator School ;)
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: You have much to learn, my son. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-16 [sara(:]: x.x
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yo. What up, son?
2007-11-16 [sara(:]: ...yo yourself. Not your IQ, son.
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes, much to learn.. As do you. Stop calling me son XP I am a Girl... XP Call Sara. son all you wnat though ;)
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Yeah... It's so high already, it'll be pretty hard to get it higher... you're both my sons!
2007-11-16 [sara(:]: *shakes head* You're an idiot.
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Okay okay, I can be a son if necessary XD
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Quiet, my son. ...*eats ramen*... ah... fresh off the ramen tree...
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Hahah XD I should go to sleep.... *stays awake* ... I have to get up for college in... ... ... ... *many repeated elipsis* four hours XD
2007-11-16 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, wit (somewhat) from a new person? I like him already.
Quiet Devil.
2007-11-16 [Pillowthief]: ...I mean "Devlin". Sorry about that.
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Wit, eh? Then I believe we should discuss important topics. How about the nation's national budget deficit? I believe we should halt domestic spending to help pay off the debt, otherwise we'll end up so far in the hole it will be impossible to get out...... HUCK HUCK HAYUCK!! ...I's jus' kiddin'! ...*chews tobaccy*... *hitches up overalls*...
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Oh How I do love this wiki.. *drifts away in a daydream*
2007-11-16 [Pillowthief]: *shoots arrow at daydream*
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Thanks.. Nearly gone for a minute there!
2007-11-16 [Eloura]: *laughs pointing out before that she was joking about the "guys" and eats ramen and grins evily* I wanna here more a narating.
2007-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: "More narrating? Well.., this is all you will get" the narrator said as she readied to leave for the night. The show will continue tomorrow, thankyou for watching; Mort & Pillowtheif - The Wonder Years.
2007-11-16 [Eloura]: *Sc4reams for more narrating and say's. "I missed the show........ NOT FAIR *curses the cable programing for puting it on on the wrong time*
2007-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, dude! ...it was the best episode ever! ...you should have seen it! ...*eats ramen*... too bad... they never show repeats...
2007-11-17 [Duke Devlin]: *is now out of Narrator mode* .. Yeh, sucks to be you. *would eat ramen.. if it was her thing ;)* ...
2007-11-18 [nokaredes]: Only one comment all day? ...pathetic.
2007-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: It is quiet, huh? *sigh* Pitiful. I would send more, but you see, that would have been lame.
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?!! ...why are there so few comments?!?!! ...*eats ramen in rage*...
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: *nods sadly* .. It sucks huh? I thought the same when I came, but I didn't wanna leave one ;) Cause I left the last one XD
Zomg. How rude of me. I have never eaten in this here Diner.
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...shame on you!
2007-11-19 [sara(:]: Ha.
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: I know. >< Can I order? ;)
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, Sara! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7h76cXjKLo
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sho'. What you want?
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: *grins* I'd like Numebr 7 on the dinner list, and number one on the drinsk list. *grins*
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *liquifies your meal*... *throws it at your face*...
2007-11-19 [Eloura]: I'll take a number 1 on the lunch list and a number 11 on the drink *wonders when the next show will come back on*
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Thanks! *grins as she is hit by it* =) Yum.
2007-11-19 [Eloura]: *pouts*
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: I think you should outlaw pouting Mort.. It's scary and suggestive ;.;
2007-11-19 [Eloura]: Hows it scary or for that matter how is it suggestive?
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Pouting is suggestive ;) I didn't mean it.. meanly. I was bored ;)
Scary.. cause of the suggestiveness of it all XD
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a lamb at you*... heh... suggestive...
2007-11-19 [Eloura]: OHHHHHH really.... hmmm i should keep that in mind O.o (never said you said it meanly ;)I understand the bordomness ) AHHHHHHHH Ok. *catchs lamb and say's* Hey where's my number 11 drink?
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...in the lamb. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-19 [Eloura]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! Ok *eats and drinks? leg of lamb*
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Mmm leg of lamb.. I'm ordering that tomorrow.. YOu serve Gammon here? *smile*
2007-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I don't even know what all we serve... go check the food pile.
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: *salutes* Will do. *laughs*
Awwhh damn.
2007-11-19 [Pillowthief]: *pouts suggestively*
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Oh really? ;)
2007-11-19 [Pillowthief]: Yes. Reary.
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Reary huh? XP
2007-11-19 [Pillowthief]: Yesh. Reeary.
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Okie dokie ^^ You're the boss.
2007-11-19 [Pillowthief]: Its lonely being the boss.
2007-11-19 [Pillowthief]: *sings "Im Soo Ronely" from Team America*
2007-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Awwwhh bless ya.. I'd keep ya company.., but I am just a lowly customer.. that never leaves. *grins*
2007-11-20 [Pillowthief]: *harpoons possibly-not-Devlin*
2007-11-20 [Pillowthief]: Heh. Har-pwn'd.
That makes me a    harpoonist.
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...har-pwn'd?!! ...Sir... I'm going to need to see your Pun License.
2007-11-20 [Pillowthief]: Its right here... wait. This isnt my licence! Damn Chuck Norris and your jeans! Stop giving me advertisements for them, I wont wear them!
  

2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Must... buy... jeans...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: -_¬ kick him back ;)`
damn harpoonists..
2007-11-20 [Eloura]: *walks in from another room in the diner and say's* I wanna order a Number 1 and 3 from the breakfast menu and a number 8 from drink.
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *smashes your meal together and pours tea on it*... *throws it in the toilet*... another job well done. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-20 [Eloura]: Ermmm yum!?
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...damn straight! ...*wears Chuck Norris pants*...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: You succumbed to the jeans... *shakes head at Mort*
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *roundhouse kicks you in the face*... hey! They don't restrict movement! ...I can kick all day! ...*kicks some orphans*...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: I can kick you right back ;) *kicks you >>* XP
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Hadouken! ...*takes away 80% of your life*...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: Oh No!!! *groans dramatically* .. Kame-hame-hA!!!! *XP*
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: It's on now, mutha' ******! Kaio-ken!
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: Oh Noes!!! *flailing arms*
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait... what am I doing...? ...*just shoots you with a shotgun*...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: *jumps and weirdly survives* ... Bwahahaha~ *evil laughter* ...
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*calls Chuck Norris*...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: Oh Noes... *calls ... ... Tom Felton* ;) He will protect me ;)
2007-11-20 [Pillowthief]: Im sorry to have to be the one to tell you this... Tom Felton died last night. He was roundhouse kicked to death. Apparently after talking with Mort, Chuck Norris was so angry he roundhouse kicked soo quickly that he traveled back in time to yesterday where he ganged up on poor Tom with his other self. He didnt really need his other self, but they both wanted to do the beating and couldnt decide who got first dibs. Besides, Chuck Norris realized that Chuck Norris had a sense of humor and that repeatedly roundhouse kicking someone in the face is just plain funny.
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: Damn.. Well thats my long lost love dead then.. Okay.. I will protect me ;)
2007-11-20 [Pillowthief]: Im sorry to have to be the one to tell you this... Tom Felton was your father and the impact of Chuck Norris' boot on Toms head resulted in Tom turning steril- when we was 7. Therefor, you were never created and are now dead too.
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: Nah Tom Felton wasn't my father ;)
I'm sorry to be the one to tell you this, but you are grossly misinformed XP
2007-11-20 [Fearathress]: oO
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you this... but Pillowthief is your brother. And also... he's the last jedi. He's... our only hope. ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: =O
2007-11-20 [Fearathress]: Then we.. i mean you are damned.
2007-11-20 [nokaredes]: PT, is your "e" button broken? Because you seem to be neglecting to use it...
2007-11-20 [Pillowthief]: (T + 0 * 2) - M = 1/2 ND
Proof that he fathered you. Dont mess with me, I can also prove you dont exist.
2007-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...don't forget his ' button...
2007-11-20 [Fearathress]: lol
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: Do so, please ;)
Yes.. Apostraphes are important ;.;
2007-11-21 [Pillowthief]: He lost that shortly after he went sterile.
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: Damn.
Now you kill the commas? DX
2007-11-21 [Pillowthief]: No, those are mine.
2007-11-21 [Eloura]: O.o *hides and say's* mrrrr safety *hides in a whale tank*
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *Sits up in the rafters*
2007-11-21 [Eloura]: *CLIMBS OUT OF WHALE TANK SOPPING WET AND CURLS UP ON A LEDGE AND LOOKS LIKE A KITTEN*
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *Randomly throws water baloons down at the people arguing.* Heeheeehe.
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons eloura*
2007-11-21 [Eloura]: *ish harpooned and die's agai n*
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws molotov cocktails up into the rafters*
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: Bwahahaha.
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *doges the cocktails and throws more water ballons.* MWHAHAHA
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of chickens fly up there and molest you*
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: Ahhh!!!!
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: *points and laughs... oddly anticipating -___-*
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *gets away and becomes invsible.*
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *the chickens have heat vision goggles!*
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: XD You're stuffed Feara ;)
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *Puts on cold cloak that blocks all heat.*
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...quick! ...get that big, conspicuous cloaked figure!
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: (LOL)


*Runs behinde Duke and kicks in the ass before fleeing the buliding.*
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: WOAH! DX Now that was uncalled for! *pouts and hugs the poor DONKEY XD*
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: *Yells behinde.* I SHALL NEVER BE STUFFED!! XD
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha, sucker! You can't escape Bob's Diner! ...we have over one million restaurants nation wide! ...they are, however, all concentrated in this one little area... *points out the hole in the wall to a row of Bob's Diners next door*
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: It's all good. If one gets blown up or something, then the others at the other end of the line are all good ;D
2007-11-21 [Fearathress]: lol...
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...actually... the others are worse off than this one... that one over there is on fire... that one has a minotaur on it's roof... and that one...? ...that one's the worst of all... it's... out of ramen.
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: Damn.. *shields your eyes* It's not true.., don't worry.., its a myth!
2007-11-21 [Pillowthief]: Damn vegans.


Wait, do we like vegans? Hmm. Eh, might as well just blame the Mormons, I think I got them all.
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: Vegans? Not sure.. *shrug* Blame who you like.
2007-11-21 [Pillowthief]: The Mormons ate all the ramen!
2007-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...curse you, Mormons! ...we should get Chuck to hunt them down...
2007-11-21 [Duke Devlin]: Yes you should >>
2007-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nah... Chuck's in Asia right now...
2007-11-22 [Duke Devlin]: Figures ;)
2007-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *the health inspector bursts in!*...
2007-11-22 [Duke Devlin]: Hello Mister Inspector.., everythings great here... *shifty*
2007-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *inspector dies from the toxins*
2007-11-22 [nokaredes]: Well, that solves that, doesn't it?
2007-11-22 [Duke Devlin]: Now, how to dispose of the body? =O *ponders*
2007-11-22 [sara(:]: Junior's gay. kthnx.
2007-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'll come over there and make out with you to prove you wrong! ...and we don't bury bodies here! ...just leave it there... I'm sure the lions will eat it...
2007-11-23 [Duke Devlin]: Okay, thats all good then. *sips tea*
2007-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...today's the 23rd!! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-24 [Duke Devlin]: Omg. Shocking! =O
2007-11-24 [Duke Devlin]: I was Scared ===> [Waltzing Warlus] 00
2007-11-24 [nokaredes]: ...what's the 23rd and why should we care?
2007-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...because... 23!! ...*eats ramen*... needs some pork... I wonder where Babe is...
2007-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn [Waltzing Warlus]...
2007-11-24 [Duke Devlin]: I know! Shocking huh. I was all... HEY! Thats not Mort... >>
2007-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *campaigns for The Ramen Party in the upcoming presidential election* (for more information on the Ramen Party, please refer yourself to 181 pages back on 2007-02-06)
2007-11-24 [Duke Devlin]: ... *follows your campaign* .. Hmm..
2007-11-25 [nokaredes]: ...I never saw that movie...
2007-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: So far, the Ramen Party has won New Jersey... not that that's anything to be proud of... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: Well it's a start. =D
2007-11-25 [Pillowthief]: Have you guys seen the elections? First year in history both a woman and an african-american has ran for president. Crazy.


Me? Hilary rocks my socks, she's got my vote. Screw ramen.
2007-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: Craziness.
I know sweet F.A about your elections over there ;) Being a Britishy person =]
2007-11-25 [Pillowthief]:   
2007-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: XD
2007-11-25 [Pillowthief]: Btw, Hilary is the wife of Bill Clinton, the president that got the blowjob a couple years ago, if you kept up on things like that.
2007-11-25 [Pillowthief]: For hundreds of years, the American government lied to the Natives, then Bill Clinton lies about an affair and suddenly everyone is surprised. Kinda hypocritical if you ask me.
2007-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: I know who Hilary is.. Not sure why XD
Very hypocritical oO
2007-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I'd rather see Obama as president than Hilary... or Giuliani. ...or Stephen Colbert...
2007-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Heh... I remember ol' Bill... I'd vote for him any day.
2007-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Good news! ...the Ramen Party won Canada! ...I'm not sure why it matters, but we won 'em! ...also Alaska... which is like two votes...
2007-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo good for you ;)
2007-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at sign, "No Complimentin'!"*
2007-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: I was being sarcastic ;) No compliments from this mouth.
2007-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at other sign, "No Sarcasticism!"*... sorry... our sign guy was illiterate...
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh I see., I'll refrain from using sarcasm then -___-
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Vous puer de cheval merde, ma chère. *kisses Duke's hand*
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh, hide the insult with a sleazy hand kiss XP
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Look! ...a leper! *torches the place while your back is turned*
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: Whaaa? *dramatic hand over mouth action* =O
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Suckers! *jetpacks away*... *gets caught in a tree branch*... darn it!
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: Walks out of the building* ,.. That was weird.. The arsonist was never seen...
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I bet it was... Nokaredes!
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: *looks up* Says the one in the tree... oO Maybe it was =O
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yes... of course... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: *raises eyebrow* ... We'll all trust the ramen-eating-tree-climber. *grin*
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Excellent... *steeples fingers*
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: ... .... *ellipses*
2007-11-26 [nokaredes]: ...it wasn't me! (Haha, horse shit.)
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: XD
2007-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *witnesses come forward and say they saw Nok do it*
2007-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo what an interesting turn of events... *wide eyes*
2007-11-26 [Pillowthief]: It was... Non-Devlin in the Diner with the Lead Pipe! *Wins at Clue*
2007-11-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: hello,how are you guys today?
2007-11-26 [nokaredes]: We're better than your mom last night, that's for darn sure!
2007-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the...?
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...It was Misty's mom... in the bedroom... with a lead pipe.
2007-11-27 [Pillowthief]: She has two of them. Thats suspicious right there..
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: It suuuuure is... *guys burst in and drag Pillowthief away, wrapped in a white jacket*
2007-11-27 [Pillowthief]: NooooooooOooooooooOOOOoooooOooooooooO.oOOOOOoooooooooo *looks at watch* Oooooooooooooooo!
2007-11-27 [nokaredes]: That's not exactly suspicious... Misty could just have lesbian moms!
2007-11-27 [Pillowthief]: Lead pipe wielding lesbian moms! Suspicious...
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Misty has three moms...
2007-11-27 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, but the last one just welds. Lead pipes.
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sounds suspicious...
2007-11-27 [nokaredes]: Welding is an awesome hobby... wielding... not so much.
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...also suspicious! ...*calls the cops on Nok*...
2007-11-27 [Pillowthief]: *The police release the lions!*
*The lions sniff at Nok and decide that she's not christian*
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn Muslims! ...and also Mormons... and Jews...
2007-11-27 [Xeroh Kanoe]: You guys wanna know something neat?
2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...not really, but for conversation's sake... sure! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-11-27 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Looks to me like Naruto's a rip-off.


  

2007-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...that thing again?! ...darn you... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-27 [Duke Devlin]: Why would anyone care? DX No offense =)
XP It's just a tv show XD
2007-11-27 [Pillowthief]: See! Ninja stuff was blocked again, thanks to PirateComputer3212...
2007-11-27 [Duke Devlin]: Bwahaha *evil laughter* ...
oO Nevermind XD
2007-11-28 [Pillowthief]: *Ninja comment detected. Determining Threat Level...
User: Non-Devlin
Threat Level: Minimal
Canceling Call to Chuck Norris...*
2007-11-28 [Duke Devlin]: Meh I ain't no Ninja. They suck.
Taekwondo is more my thing ;)
More fun. More entertaining too.
Blah blah blah.
I couldn't be a threat in ninja'ing if I tried XD
2007-11-28 [Pillowthief]: *Reassessing Threat Level due to new information.
User: Non-Devlin
Threat Level: Non-Existant*
2007-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in wearing all black*... *throws ninja stars at pillowthief*...
2007-11-28 [Eloura]: *walks in dressed in something kinda preppy and smirks bringing out sword for fighting*
2007-11-28 [Duke Devlin]: Thought so ;)
I ain't no threat.., he might be though! *points at Mort*
2007-11-28 [Chetleon]: Hmmm I can at least add THE PLACE may add "Bob's Diner" to it's list of places...
2007-11-28 [Duke Devlin]: Eh? =O THE PLACE? Shocking capital letters?!
2007-11-28 [Pillowthief]: *Threat Level Escalated!
Ninja Stars Incoming!
Projecting Flight Path...
Initiating Evasive Manuvers...
Hard to Port.
Speed: 12 Knots.
Preparing Starboard Cannons.
Calling Chuck Norris for Arming Codes*
2007-11-28 [Duke Devlin]: *hides out of the way, behind... Pillowthief and the rest ;)*
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: *Flanking Detected.
Preparing Port Cannons.
Preparing Aft Cannons*
2007-11-29 [Duke Devlin]: Waaahhh! *hides outside* ;)
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: *Calls Chuck Norris to go kill Non-Devlin*
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...What?! ..."port cannons"?!
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: Oh yeah. Having cannons on just the starboard side would just be dumb.
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course. *throws more ninja stars*
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: *Chuck Norris has Authenticated the Arming Codes.
Ammunition Going Live.
Condition Red.
Preparing Return Fire*
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *jams your port side cannon with ninja stars*
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: *Points to small print on cannon which reads: Guaranteed not to jam or your money back!*
*Coats Mort in Grape Jam!*
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: It burns! *melts*
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1uwOL4rB-go
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: Yarr'd yarr yar.
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you and your speech impediment... *eats ramen*...
2007-11-29 [Eloura]: *blinks no longer preepynesses and blinks yawning* Hmmmm bob's diner should serve energy drink LOL!
2007-11-29 [nokaredes]: ...if you don't see it on the menu, you're supposed to add it yourself, you lazy bum!
2007-11-29 [Eloura]: Hey! I am proud to be one *laughs* Soooooo should we have them?
2007-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...?
2007-11-29 [Pillowthief]: ...*Eats Newspaper-Colored-Breakfast-Sandwich*...?
2007-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it's dark in here... *light a torch*...
2007-11-30 [Pillowthief]: Crap.
2007-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *tries to dig a tunnel*
2007-11-30 [Pillowthief]: *Swallows boiling hot water, Army of Darkness style*
2007-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *uses your lung as an umbrella*
2007-11-30 [Pillowthief]: *Eats penguin poison*
2007-11-30 [Lethan]: *eats poison penguin*
2007-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *gives pillowthief indigestion*... *dissolves*...
2007-12-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn misty infestation... *calls the exterminator*... *Schwarzenegger bursts in*... "I'm gonna needs some heavy duty weapons for this 'un," *he bursts out*... "I'll be back."
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are crazy mort.
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *he bursts in through the window and starts randomly firing an Uzi*
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: whatever.
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: "Say hello to my little friend!" ...*he repeatedly shoots misty with his Uzi*...
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in*What the hell.
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...more mistys?! ...*lights the place on fire... again*...
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: what are you doing
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...burning the evidence! ...huck huck hyuck! *throws gasoline on everything*
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ha ha! Burn the truth! *burns self*
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the hell...?
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *is dead*... suckers.
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...*skips to billy's diner*
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Billy's Diner is a conglomerate of the Bob's Empire Corporation. ...*eats ramen*... good luck finding a restuarant we don't own! Wha ha haa!! ...*torches Billy's Diner*...
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *skips to Mcdonalds*
2007-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn you, McDonalds! *shakes fist at the sky*
2007-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: News Report, 2nd December 2007 : A tragic accident at the McDonalds HQ has left the company unsupervised, causing mass shutdown of the popular food chain. While everyone in the building died in the mysterious fire, a bizarre poster depicting a penguin, in the style of one of the propoganda posters of WW2, was found attached to the walls of the charred building. We believe the arsonist was working for the rival restuarant chain, 'Bob's Diner', though we do not believe the CEO himself, Mortified Penguin as his alias is known, was responsible, but rather a minion of some kind.
Duke, BBC News 24.
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: *Burns down British news station*
2007-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: *is running away*
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: *harpoons Non-Devlin*
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: *Misses and hits Non-Bough*
2007-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: *is harpooned.. for the third time XD(
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]:   
2007-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: XD Wtf? XD
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: I keep some evil robots around to laugh for me, so what?
2007-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: Ah no problems here. I myself use hyenas. I think it gives a better effect.
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: Except for the... smell... And the whole eating you thing.
2007-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: Nah they don't eat everyone, but yeh they smell abit. That's why I wash them.., with Pantene Pro V.
2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: I think I'll stick with my evil robots. The only problem that I have to deal with is occasionally mind-wiping them- If I dont they end up rambling about 'world domination' or some such. You know you can
  

2007-12-02 [Pillowthief]: If that doesnt work I can always have Space Ghost blast them with his laser. He's always helpful in those situations.
  
  

2007-12-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: what the...?
2007-12-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Zorak spits upon your Space Ghost. 
2007-12-03 [Eloura]: *eats ramen grinning and hide's the evidence of the McDonalds pictures from the ac cident and smirks drinking energy drink bought from local grocery bag*
2007-12-03 [Duke Devlin]: *orders no. 19 on the appetisers list, and eats XD*
2007-12-03 [Eloura]: *orders a number 1 from lunch*
2007-12-03 [Pillowthief]: I wont take this abuse Zorak!
  

2007-12-03 [Pillowthief]:      
2007-12-03 [Duke Devlin]:
  

I GLOVE YOU I DO!!!
2007-12-03 [Pillowthief]:   Brak: "Belle conino"
2007-12-03 [Duke Devlin]: But I Glove you ;)
2007-12-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *holds a funneral service for Zorak... and Space Ghost's career*
2007-12-03 [Duke Devlin]: Shame.. Shame..
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *some praying mantises burst in and pay their respects*
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... should we be holding a funeral inside a diner?! ...oh well... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]: *Praying mantises eat their children*
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *their children had bombs strapped to their thoraxes!*... *tiny explosions ensue*...
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=av6fWfmugds
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LvFjo5TTY6c&watch_response
2007-12-04 [Eloura]: *pouts waiting for food to arive*
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a sheep at you*
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]:   
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... sheep...
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]:   
2007-12-04 [nokaredes]: For one, [Pillowthief] stop uploading that shit to ET's servers because that's against the uploading art rules. For another, stop having images in the comments! This page already loads pretty wonky already...
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Uploading Art Rules are for suckers! ...*uploads useless crap that other people made*... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...besides... it's not against the UAR... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]: If I was claiming them as my own or posting them on my house, I'd have some problems. Besides, they're funny. Heh, I just called Mort a sheep fuk3r.
2007-12-04 [Eloura]: *decides between a number one or number two for the lunch special* Hmmm leg of bob or hamburger with fries... *pouts about there not being any hot chocolate so ask's for hot coffee*
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...*various animals burst in and drag pillowthief into the streets*... *dumps boiling coffee on Eloura*... and Bob ran out of legs a long time ago...
2007-12-04 [Duke Devlin]: Sheeeeeesh.
Sheep.
Too many e's.
Wtf.
Whatever.
Overtired.
Viva La Psychology Conference
-____-
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]: Not the woodchuck! Noooooooo!!
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...especially the woodchuck! ...and a beaver or two... and that badger... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]: The badger is alright with me, we had a fight, but we're cool now. That woodchuck though, he stole my wallet!
And who wouldnt want a beaver or two *wink wink*
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heh... beavers... *high fives the giant Gekko beside me*... wait... giant gekko?! ...oh well... *he tells me about car insurance*...
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *talks to the giant duck on my other side*... *he tells me about some other type of insurance*...
2007-12-04 [Pillowthief]: I dont know, I always say 'Never trust a gekko'. I saved $120 dollars by switching from Geico. No joke.


Ok, maybe I dont always say 'never trust a gekko', but you get my point.
2007-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You should buy some Bob's Diner Insurance... It may cost more... but it's worth it! ...maybe... *eats ramen*... *sells insurance to passing children*...
2007-12-05 [nokaredes]: ...children don't buy insurance!
2007-12-05 [Pillowthief]: Not according to my statistics...
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Those children just haven't found the right insurance yet... *sells life insurance to kindergarteners*... it's only $100 a month! *eats ramen*
2007-12-05 [Pillowthief]: Dont forget the binding contract!
Thank you Ursula. *Hands kindergardener Binding Contract*
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Binding contracts for everyone! *passes out sheets and pencils*... *pops a kid upside the head*... sign inside the lines, stupid!
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Now... all we need is an official notary...
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Nok? Eloura? Non-Devin? How about you, inconspicuous, dark character in the shadow in the corner? ...*he glances up for a second and then goes back to staring at the floor*...
2007-12-05 [Duke Devlin]: Sure, why not eh? Hand some insurance over, binding contract and all ;)
Oh, and if you do Lemon insurance, let me know.., damn things are always getting nicked.
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nah... we only offer coverage on limes...
2007-12-05 [Duke Devlin]: I can deal with that, my Limes get stolen alot too..
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Really...? ...that sucks... *hides big bag of limes behind his back*... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-05 [Duke Devlin]: *scratches head* It's crazy.. I don't know what's going on..
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sure it's just some crazy teens... *glances at Nokaredes*...
2007-12-05 [Duke Devlin]: *looks over* Must be.. >_> <_<
2007-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Stinkin' Nokaredes and her lime obsession... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-05 [nokaredes]: I don't like limes. Only lemons.
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...la vie lemons?!
2007-12-06 [nokaredes]: Yay candy! :D
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...candy?! ...it burns!
2007-12-06 [Pillowthief]: The Life Lemon? Where?
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...over there... on that tree... of life...
2007-12-06 [Pillowthief]: *pumps shotgun vigiously, while doing redneck impression*
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: *grubles while walking in starving for the death causing bob's diner food* What was i supposed to sign? *returns to her dark and shadowed corner*
2007-12-06 [Pillowthief]: *Whoo hoo!*
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: Whoot!
2007-12-06 [nokaredes]: ...are you shooting Emily?!
2007-12-06 [Pillowthief]: Not really, since she isnt here anymore...
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: O.o
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *turns the light on in Eloura's dark corner*
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!! It burns *sheild eyes*
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Woops... that's the acid squirting lightbulb... *changes to a regular bulb*...
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: *winces no blind*
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: I ish no longer blind!!! WHOOT! I ISH SOOOOS HAPPY!!!
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: Hiya cici!
2007-12-06 [~★~ gone~★~]: Hello Jessy
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: Hiya! You enjoying your first time on et? Busy as err hell? *wonders if hell technicly froze over last night* If hou have any questions you know where i live!
2007-12-06 [~★~ gone~★~]: Yes hell really did freeze over last night I sould know I kinda live there.
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: I was wondering though if hell froze over you got out O.o
2007-12-06 [~★~ gone~★~]: i'm just kool like that [lol]
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: Lol RIGHT! And i'm am the queen of ice. *rolls eyes* (hey using [] makes it hard because that's how you show and activates someone's name)
2007-12-06 [~★~ gone~★~]: oh so now i have to chage my ways this is going to be hard
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: epp! Sorry *hides* That's why i use ** O.o
2007-12-06 [~★~ gone~★~]: ok i'll try to change my ways
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: Ok ash long as you try. (hey will you meet me at the steps for the bus?)
2007-12-06 [~★~ gone~★~]: sure
2007-12-06 [Eloura]: Ok thankies *orders food* I wanna number 1 from lunch
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what up, alleged newcomer?! ...*the gang of chickens burst in and drag Jean into the streets*... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-06 [Pillowthief]: Not the chickens from The Legend of Zelda again!


Oh well, might as well crush her hopes as well.
  

2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...unless she orders a pony burger.
2007-12-06 [Pillowthief]: Of course.
2007-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots another pony out back... just in case*
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Making sure we have enough burgers?
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: "Burgers"...? ...*shoots another pony*... what's a "burger"?
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Ah. Polo it is then.
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... polio...
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *giggles at jean* welcome to random city! *waits impatcientlu for food*
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws food at you again*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: Yay!
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *...but it misses and goes out the window*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *cries* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MY FOOOD *sniffles*
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *the food explodes into a fine mist*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOO
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *the mist explodes into an even finer mist*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *bursts into heavy tears* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO *cry's and pouts* It was such a good hamburger
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *yours tears drown the mice on the floor*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *looks down and laughs a dead mice*
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *they come back as zombies and eat you*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *is now in millions of peices in millions of mice being digested*
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Ew.
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *millions of me say blame mort*
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *slurp*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: *mice eat mort alive*
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Ew.
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *the chickens eat the mice*
2007-12-07 [nokaredes]: ...the first thing that came into my head when I read that was, "hi-ho, the dairy-o, the chickens eat the mice" and I don't know why...
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably just the toxins in here effecting your brain...
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Isnt it "hi-ho the cherry-o"? I used to have that board came. Damnit. Now I miss Candyland.
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Candyland was raided by some irate dentists... there's not much left of it. They massacred the gingerbread people.
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Noo. No. That can't be...
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: They crushed their little cookie dreams...
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: The sugar plums? What about the sugar plums?
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Destroyed.
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: *sob*
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: And they dammed up the chocolate river and burned down the candycane forest... and gumdrop mountain? You don't want to know.
2007-12-07 [Pillowthief]: What about Charlie and the Candy Mountain?
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Gone. Along with the magical leoplurydon... and Charlie's kidneys.
2007-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Vaya con dios. *sign of the cross*
2007-12-07 [Eloura]: O.o EPP!
2007-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: I agree! *nods and points dramatically*
2007-12-08 [Eloura]: eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhpppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp
2007-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: Wow.. You should get that fixed! *hands you a doctor's card*
2007-12-08 [Eloura]: What fixed?
2007-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: That crazy speech impediment you've got going on. The whole 'eeeeeeeehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhpppppppppp' thing.. It's very sad. =(
2007-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I think it's just extra long stuttering... Which can easily be cured... with Granny's New Miracle Tonic!... it slices, it dices... it cures stuttering! ...and cancer!! ...BUY SOME!! *hurls a bottle at eloura* WARNING: May cause extreme diarrhea and/or death
2007-12-09 [Duke Devlin]: I like the sounds of that. Can I sell it door to door like Cookies? *grin*
2007-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... but you'll have to wear a gas mask... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-09 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes.. *grins*
2007-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]:


http://quizrocket.com/pirate-vs-ninja-quiz?gatherer_id=100377&utm_source=MySpace&utm_medium=Banner&utm_campaign=ninjapiratequiz
2007-12-09 [Eloura]: *drinks tonic and ipediment get;s worse* Iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiishhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiisssssssssssssssssssssssssssss mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiissssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss''''''''''''''''''''''''sssssssssssssssssssssssssssss ccccccccccccccccccccccccccccccclllllllllllllllllllllllllllaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuusssssssssssssssssssseeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-12-09 [Duke Devlin]: I'll find out for you later MOrt ;)
2007-12-09 [nokaredes]: I can't do the test, it keeps saying my address is invalid T_T
2007-12-10 [Eloura]: *drinks a cold water*
2007-12-10 [Duke Devlin]: Doing it now! =O
2007-12-10 [Duke Devlin]: I'm A Ninja!!! *dances*
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *Chuck Norris bursts in and roundhouse kicks you in the face*
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm, that hurt a fair bit... >< Listen to The Ultimate Showdown Chuck >>
Meh, you'd have attacked me regardless of what I got ;)
2007-12-11 [Eloura]: O.o *eats popcorn watching the show*
2007-12-11 [Pillowthief]: Ho bitches, I have internet.
All your bases belong to me.






... No. Nooooo!
No Ninja Blocker! Aggggh!
Quick PirateLaptop! Call Chuck Norris!!!
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Zomfg. How terrifying!! I did always love Pirates <3
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually... I sold my base to satan a long time ago in exchange for a quarter so I could buy some gum...
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Wow, now that is impressive. An impressive waste of .. something.
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.google.com/intl/xx-hacker/
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: XD That's pretty cool
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said! ...*eat ramen*...
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Oh Yeh ;)
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's right. I changed the special! ...for the first time in several years!
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Wooo =D
WAIT
I thought Bob ran out of legs? =O
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: New Bob.
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ah I see., should've guessed really. He seems to be expendable.
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... *throws the old Bob into the dumpster*
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ew, you should burn him. More barbecuey smell, less rotting flesh smell. Do you want the Health Inspectors again? :)
2007-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not sure there are even any health inspectors left alive...
2007-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Wow! Then don't worry. I'll barbecue dead old Bob later. I could do with a bit of baconey tasting meat.., even if it isn't bacon. >=D
2007-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I think Bob is a cross between chicken and beef...
2007-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: Ah I see, I assumed that since his leg is pictured as human leg, that it would taste like human; Baconey. =)
2007-12-12 [nokaredes]: His leg is only pictured as a human leg because there is no one on Earth who could draw Bob's real leg.
2007-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: Right,. I see
2007-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: There has been a drawing of someone reacting to Bob's leg... they call it... The Scream... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: Wow. I have seen that, that is simply amazingly dramatic!
2007-12-12 [nokaredes]: Did they ever get The Scream back from whoever stole it...?
2007-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: *shrug* Dunno.. ?___?
2007-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: They found it like... either this year or last year...
2007-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo I see oO
2007-12-13 [Eloura]: Hey!!!! Today's special is Hamburgers. O.o By the way where is Mortified's keeper?
2007-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: oO Wtf.
Nah the special is 'Something we found by the side of the road' I think XD YUM
2007-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope! ...hamburger.
2007-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: XD Yeh, cause you just changed it XD
2007-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuuure I did... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: XD Well, if you think differently, look at the previous page edit >=D
Haha oh well.
Maybe I was hallucinating huh? Yeh, I must be the insane one ;)
oO
2007-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... You are... *the gang of chickens burst in and tie you up in a white shirt and drag you away*...
2007-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh!!!! Hhahhhhhahahaha *loud screaming* ... *flails and jumps away* Bah. You chikens!!! You never learn! >>
2007-12-14 [Eloura]: Where's the tacos from taco bell??? Today's friday people!!!!!!!!!!!!! Again, where is mort's keeper?
2007-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: She's dead... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-15 [Duke Devlin]: Hahahaha XD
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Two peanuts were walking in a tough neighborhood and one of them was a-salted.
2007-12-16 [Duke Devlin]: XD
WTF Nice joke XD
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Old doctors never die they just lose their patience.
2007-12-16 [Duke Devlin]: XD They just keep coming XD
Come on! Give us more!! ;)
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
2007-12-16 [Duke Devlin]: XD I gotta tell that one to one of my Philsophy teachers XD
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: A prisoner's favorite punctuation mark is the period. It marks the end of his sentence.
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid puns... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: You know... seven days without a pun makes one weak.
2007-12-16 [Duke Devlin]: XD
XD
Lol. Wtf? XD Puns are pretty funny XD
2007-12-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello everyone.
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *Everyone glances up from his chair*... "Huh?"... *he goes back to reading his newspaper*...
2007-12-17 [nokaredes]: We have chairs again...?
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Chairs... corpses... same thing.
2007-12-17 [Eloura]: Yum!! LEG O' LAMB
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: *grabs a corpse-chair and sits down* Darn those achin' legs.
2007-12-17 [Eloura]: *laughs and say's* We got new chairs!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Bwahahah
2007-12-17 [Eloura]: *laughs maniicly and say's* We need a news update, and a news report from ya Devlin
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Oh of course ;)
7 O'Clock New's Update
In tonights news, the 'BDC', or 'Bob's Diner Corporation', food chain has had all charges of Health Code Violations dropped this morning. It is believed that the plaintif was threatened by a band of Old-Earth Pirates. According to witnesses, the trial today was called off during it's mid-point break. More on this surprising update as it comes in. This is D.Devlin, BBC News.
2007-12-17 [Eloura]: *applaudes* Very good
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: *takes a bow*
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...BBC?! ...filthy Brits... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Sorry, they hired me to give you the news over here. Bob's Diner doesn't appear to have a tv.. *looks around* Nope.
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...the chickens jacked my TV again?! ...darn it... we need to hire some security...
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Yep.. *shakes head sadly* ... You could ask the BBC to send a few ninja foxes over? They are good at fighting Chickens, especially the tv jacking kind.
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah... British and ninja...? ...they'd attack Pillowthief... maybe if they have something along the lines of... Chuck Norris...? ...or if he's not available... maybe Mr. T can help...
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Mr. T ... Yeh probably, I doubt they could get Chuck Norris, I think he's busy in Asia or something.. oO
Weirdly, I just saw an advert with Mr. T on it XD Or some guy that looks like him.
2007-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I pity the foo that doesn't like ramen! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Quite! Yum. =D
2007-12-18 [Eloura]: *double takes and say's* But we got a new tv yesterday.... >.< *hunts the chickens down and turns them into high quality chicken scratch*
2007-12-18 [Eloura]: Hey by the way today is leg of bob
2007-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: No it isn't. It's leg of lamb XP
2007-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: There! ...it's back to just being a question mark. Too much work changing it every day...
2007-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: Damn right! I was ashamed of you! Making us not put effort in! It should be a gamble!
"Are you allergic to the special sir?"
"Why.. I don't know!"
"Oh have it anyway! You never know!"
XD
2007-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup... that's how we got our first three lawsuits! But when they failed to show up in court (because they died), we won!
2007-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: Good! Glad to hear it.. Sounds like the case you had up against you recently. Sudden dropping out, death threats.. It was all over the news! *points to the 9th comment of mine up*
2007-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *points to my seventh comment up*
2007-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: I know ;) We are far from filthy though ;)
I think you'd really like alot of us! There is alot of narcissistic, chavvy, annoying, etc etc, others though XD
2007-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: The French are pretty filthy though... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: Well yes! I mean come on.., they eat frog's legs, 'es cargo' (COUGH Snails COUGH) etc. -___-
2007-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe the term is escargot... er... I mean... never heard of it! Sounds gross... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-19 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha I'm not french. So I wouldn't know XD But you eat that shit al you want XD
2007-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey Mort,if you talk to Turkey,please tell him I miss him,and I'm sorry.
2007-12-20 [nokaredes]: Yea, 'cause Mortimer's the only one who talks to Turkey...
2007-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,Mort,Nokaredes if either of you see Turkey,please tell him I miss him and I'm sorry,ok?
2007-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...Sorry for what?! ...*eats ramen*...
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: Where've you been Misty? =O
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: Misty Boo! *appears and sends in for a lawsuit again't bob's diner for service being slow*
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: *deflects the lawsuit with a snappy comeback - too snappy to mention here!*
2007-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: We never claimed to be fast food...
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: *Lawsuit hits self in face* Ehhh thought i'd try *goes back to work*
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: Actually Mort... *points to the quote that says - 'If you are what you eat, then we're easy, fast and cheap!'* Though actually.., you are none of those XD
PAH! Go home you Lawsuit filer!!! *throws bread at Eloura*
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: *smiles* YAY I FINNALY GOTS MY FOOD!!!! *laughs*
2007-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: One deranged person's quote doesn't speak for the entire company... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: *steals the ramen and amirks*
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: OMG! Don't steal Mort's ramen!"!!
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: Tough luck, i always do!!!!!!!!11
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: bah!
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: RAR!!! I WIN!!
2007-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *Eloura explodes*
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha! *points and laughs*
2007-12-20 [Eloura]: *thousands and thousand of tiny eloura run around annoying every one* WE WIN!! 8they scream*
2007-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: No! *sets fire to the tiny elouras*
2007-12-21 [Pillowthief]: (harpoons thousands of tiny eloras with toothpicks)
2007-12-21 [Eloura]: *they all laugh and multiply*
2007-12-21 [Duke Devlin]: No~~~! *flails legs and arms at the tiny things* DIE!!!
2007-12-21 [Eloura]: *thay all scream* We can't die!!! We stay like this and then grow bigger!!!
2007-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *sucks them up in a vacuum*
2007-12-21 [Sunrose]: :O!
2007-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! It's that guy! ...*the gang of chickens burst in and drag [Sunrose] into the streets*...
2007-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort,Tell Turkey I'm sorry for being rude to him on my wiki page.
2007-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: He says he'll forgive you (and maybe marry you) if you can get [Sagacious Turkey] unbanned... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-22 [Duke Devlin]: Why don't .. I'll message Mort about it =] Check your messages >=D Guards etc XD
2007-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmm...I'll try.
2007-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: But he has to stop spaming people and breaking the rules,otherwise he'll get banned again.
2007-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Duh... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: so you have to tell him.
2007-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I think he already knows that bad things will get you banned... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2007-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...riiiiiiiight...? ...*eats ramen*...
2007-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs*
2007-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *presses self-destruct button*
2007-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-12-23 [Duke Devlin]: Hedda said 'Why would we want someone who just wants to see how many times they can get banned here? He is not worth our time' essentially -___-
Sorry, I tried Mort.
2007-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: That sucks!
2007-12-24 [Duke Devlin]: Yep.
2007-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2007-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, that [Hedda]... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-24 [Duke Devlin]: I agree ;)
2007-12-24 [nokaredes]: ...somebody'd better wish me a happy birthday, or else!
2007-12-24 [Duke Devlin]: Oooo HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! *waves banner*
2007-12-24 [Eloura]: *thousand upon millions of eloura run from the vacum out of it and scream* HAPPY BIRTHDAY
2007-12-24 [Duke Devlin]: .....
2007-12-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Happy Birthday,I tried too but he told me,"Why do you think that we would want someone who wants to see how many times he can bet banned here?


Absolutely nothing points at that he'll stop either. He's just not worth our time."
2007-12-26 [nokaredes]: ...why weren't there fireworks or something for my birthday...? T_T
2007-12-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Bob's Diner bursts into flames... just for your birthday*
2007-12-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Ask [Hedda] to give him a brief period to be back on to prove otherwise... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-26 [Duke Devlin]: I think he copied and pasted our messages Misty. They are exactly the same XD
LAME.
>
2007-12-26 [Mortified Penguin]: One of you weirdos finish this wiki I started, as I am too lazy... Bob's Murder Case.
2007-12-26 [Duke Devlin]: Kay XD
2007-12-26 [Duke Devlin]: Can't be assed, sorry XD Eloura? Nokaredes? XD
Too lazy ;) As Mort obviously was XD Good idea though ;)
2007-12-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn you... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-26 [Duke Devlin]: XP I might add to it at some point for you, but I'm pretty tired at the moment =(
Sorry xD
2007-12-27 [Eloura]: i might also
2007-12-27 [Duke Devlin]: XD
2007-12-27 [Eloura]: :::^_^:::
2007-12-27 [nokaredes]: Why is only one of us allowed to finish it, anyway? That's too much work for one person...
2007-12-27 [Duke Devlin]: XD I don't think he literally mean just one of us XD
We could do a joint effort XD
2007-12-27 [Eloura]: Perfect!!!!!
2007-12-27 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes ;)
2007-12-27 [Eloura]: Oh *smirks*
2007-12-27 [Duke Devlin]: ;) *winks*
2007-12-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -glomps Pen-
2007-12-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Long time, no smell, eh wolfy?
2007-12-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Indeed indeed. Good to see you're not trying to tear you skin off like normal. Maybe you're changing for the better? How you been?
2007-12-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *tears skin off*... huh? What were you saying?
2007-12-27 [Eloura]: *tackles the wolfy* HI!
2007-12-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: lol hi Eloura, -sigh- well, I guess that's good too. I hate it when you change -pulls out Pen's spare skin from behind bar- How you doing Eloura?
2007-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2007-12-28 [Eloura]: I'm doing ok *bustle around to keep warm*
2007-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: I SAID HI!
2007-12-28 [Eloura]: ERRR HI MISTY!!!!! *attacks you with a soft pillow* You have been pillowed
2007-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: GLAH!
2007-12-28 [Eloura]: RAR!!
2007-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *falls over*
2007-12-28 [Eloura]: *giggles*
2007-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons the both of you*
2007-12-28 [Eloura]: *also harpoons mort*
2007-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *is a harpoon and therefore can't be harpooned*
2007-12-28 [Duke Devlin]: 04:00:38 Misty-chan(I Love Rock Lee!): I SAID HI!


Hahahaha oh the neediness Misty.. Calm yourself :) Really, it's not good for you :) <--OMFG CONCERN 00


Anywho.. Evenin'.
2007-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I SAID I WAS A HARPOON!! *harpoons Devlin*
2007-12-28 [Duke Devlin]: There's a surprise.. oO *is harpooned for the fifth or sixth time in the past two months* =D Anyway, so I have a Mort stuck in me... -_0 Strike that, I have a Mort harpooned to me, but I'm sure I'll survive. How are y'all?
2007-12-29 [Eloura]: Fine fine *sits in one of the new chair and waatches it catch on fire* Ok maybe not
2007-12-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*hello,hmmmmmmmm...*puts the fire out*
2007-12-29 [Eloura]: *shivers* Hey!!! That was cold.
2007-12-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sorry.*gives you a blanket*
2007-12-29 [Eloura]: It's ok *takes it and wraps up iin it* Thank you
2007-12-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your welcome,I brought it from home,I washed it this morning.
2007-12-29 [Eloura]: Thank you! *smiles*
2007-12-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your welcome.*smiles back*
2007-12-29 [nokaredes]: Duke Devlin and Mortimer, I demand you get a private room for that!
2007-12-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2007-12-29 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha God I love innuendo ;)
2007-12-29 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: In your indo!
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha Are you are Scrubs fan Mort? ;)
<3 Scrubs XD
2007-12-30 [nokaredes]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6V1lqQHDu_U
2007-12-30 [nokaredes]: (For anyone who doesn't know why Duke Devlin said that.)
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha love The Todd. That bit is great XD
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: www.thetoddtime.com
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: You can just write 'Duke', or 'Devlin' you know Nokaredes :)
XD Brilliant site ;)
They axed the best channel for showing Scrubs over here =(
That was ABC1, now we only have it on ParamountComedy1 >>
2007-12-30 [nokaredes]: I watch all my TV from off the internet... you can watch it off of the NBC website, like me... but only if you have a fast connection.
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo thankyou! =D Maybe I will do just that >=D
I do have a fast connection ;)
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: My computer doesn't even have the internet... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: oO Okay~~~ oO XD
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: *randomly pops in* BOO *disappears* (<---- Eloura has stolen this account for just this page!!!)
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?!
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: WAHAHAHAHAHAH I AM ELOURA COMING BACK TO HAUNT YOU!!!!!!! WAHAHAHAH
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons [~★~ gone~★~]*
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: Hey!!! It's not rigth to harpoon new people and you know it Morticus
2007-12-30 [nokaredes]: ...who's "Morticus"?
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: Mort!
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Please... just call me "your majesty".
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: Nooo Your MORTICUS
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Besides... Morticus is my evil twin brother... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: No your the Morticus The ruler!!
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe you're confusing me with my brother... Morticus the Drooler. He works next door... at "Jim's Eatery".
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: *laughs* RIIIIGHT But your morticus
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: So's your face!
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: NUTUH
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: *watches mort chokes on ramen*
2007-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: *laughs*
2007-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*I'm going crazy.
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: aren't we all!
2007-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: A confession! *the feds swarm on Misty and wrap her in a white jacket*
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: * laghs ass off and just points*
2007-12-30 [nokaredes]: That's not the job of the feds!
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: *laught* silly people
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my! Look what goes on when I get ill and disappear XD
Y'all are crazy <3
Love you though XD *laughs*
2007-12-30 [Eloura]: You know! I did most of that lol *smiles*
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: I know ;) I read the part that said that you were using someones account to attack the page ;)
Cause I read and stuffzz ;)
2007-12-30 [~★~ gone~★~]: what about Me?
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Didn't say anything about you in particular oO
The account yes.
2007-12-30 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *breaks Misty-chan out of the nuthouse and rips off the white jacket*DON'T MESS WITH MY FRIENDS MORT!
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Wow, the Misty tribe just all have really bad tempers huh?
No need to 'shout', it's a 'game' love.
2007-12-30 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Oh,sorry,Damn that caps lock,it comes on by itself I need to get it fixed.
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: Sure. Have fun with that ;)
2007-12-30 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Ok much better.
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: oO That quick? oO
2007-12-30 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Yeah,it was stuck.I forgot my little sister came in here with a rainbow pop,she must have gotten it on the keybord cause it was sticky.
2007-12-30 [Duke Devlin]: I see, well that's just gross.
2007-12-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuure... *eats ramen*...
2007-12-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *burns [~Queen Of The Shadows~] alive, harpoons [Duke Devlin], and stabs [Mortified Penguin]*
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: Well hot damn... =O Hey wait.. You actually wrote Duke Devlin rather than Devlin or Non-Devlin! *shocked*
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: *is shocked also then pouts*
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: Awwww XD Are you pouting cause you weren't stabbed, burnt or harpooned? >=D
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: *nods head all quietly and pouty like* Mort hates me... *laughs*
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: I think Mort 'hates' everyone ;) Why else would he harpoon us? XP
I think he's gotten over the childish notion of hurting those you like XD
Example, from the mouth of Lee Evans himself <3
*kicks you in the leg* I love you I do...
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: *laughs* Wait! That mean mort don't like me *Cry's anime like tears*
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: oO Nah, reread the damn comment El. XP It says "I think he's gotten over the childish notion of hurting those you like XD"
So THERE! XP
Hahah XD Maybe he just forgot XD Or didn't care.
I think we talk about Mort far too much XD
He's awesome and all, but seriously XD
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: Yea.. I tend to do tht lol ^^' *smiles and say's* SO what are you doing for the new year?
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: We all do, don't worry ;) Hey, maybe we should talk about him in personal messages ;) XD jk. Maybe make him paranoid :)
I am chillin' ;)
Ignore that chav speak ;)
Just hanging out, you know, normal stuff XD
You? =D
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: Hey that could be fun, paranoy the morticus!!! *giggles*
I'll ignore it!
Sounds like fun *smiles*
About the same, my mom me a friend and my gran are getting together. Could be Interesting!
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: WOO =D
Ooo sounds entertaining >=D
Throw champagne everywhere! XD And kiss everyone madly XD
... Get a guy too XD
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: *laughs* HEY!!! Nooo, we not throwing alchy anywhere, We will drink it first!! Besides it wouldn't be champagne!! *giggles* Lol, hmmm kiss everyone madly.. *thinks on it* NAA Wel naaa *pouts* I wish my guy could be there... *pouts* He's to far away right now.. Far away family and all..
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: Damn DX Well, kiss your friend XD It's all good on New Years Eve XD <3
Hahah XD THROW AROUND THE CHAMPAGNE, and DRINK the nicer stuff ;)
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: *laughs* I think she would try and kick my ass if i even thought about it lol!! *giggles* But we have no champagne *pouts and looks around* Well maybe. O.o Defenatly drinking the nicer stuff!!
2007-12-31 [Duke Devlin]: XD I'd kiss em anyway XD It's all part of new years XD
2007-12-31 [Eloura]: *laughs* We'll see!! Lol *giggles* It's gonna be a funny new year lol!!
2007-12-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of Italian-Americans burst in and drag Eloura into the streets*... also... I'm placing a tax on every "XD" said. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-01 [nokaredes]: [Duke Devlin] and Mortimer, sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G...
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: Eloura : this is not England Morticus *stalks back in and removes the taxes*  Gracie: Awwwwwwwwww how cute, don't kick my ass
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: You're lucky I don't know what that spells, nok! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-01 [Eloura]: *laughs at morticus and see's that taxes can never be back in bob'd diner via a lawyer*
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Also... there are no trees here. Some deforestors paid me 5 bucks to let them cut down the four million acres out back...
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots the lawyer*
2008-01-01 [Eloura]: *laughs as the lawyer walks on for he's a zombie lawyer*
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I just founded a city on SimCity... I made it through two alien invasions, a crime ring, and many earthquakes... but nooo... I had some financial troubles in 2105... then, just as I was getting more income through taxes, a tornado came through and did 100,000+ dollars of damage... I already owed too much from the early financial troubles, so I couldn't take out anymore loans. Then the stupid jerks finally impeached me in 2113... I'll show them... I'll burn their city! I'll kill 'em all! ...*eats ramen*... or... I'll just start a new city...
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: If he's a zombie, he'll have to retake his bar exam... all zombie lawyers have to be reinstated.
2008-01-01 [nokaredes]: My neighbours are shooting off fireworks...
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Shoot some back at them...
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: My neighbors are just... shooting.
2008-01-01 [Eloura]: He was reenstaed ages ago.
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Ages, eh? ...his license is probably expired.
2008-01-01 [nokaredes]: I don't have any fireworks. They're illegal here.
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: So? Rocket launchers are illegal here, but that doesn't stop me from shooting at passing planes... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: *laughs* Eloura: license has already been renewed
2008-01-01 @Not logged in user@: D*************MN! These AK-47s are pretty loud once you actually fire them. Nooooooo... those stupid movies make them seem wimpy...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*experiments*...*tases maren*...*seat reman*...*stea nrmae*... heh heh... word play...
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: So, this is what happens...


Actually, I've lost all details of the story, but it somehow involves a group of my cousins, literal thousands of bottle rockets, a few handguns, an inconspicuous tank of gasoline, a massive explosion, and a few bleeding bunnies...


What the bunnies were doing there in the first place, I haven't the foggiest idea...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: 1) 04:00:19 nokaredes: [Duke Devlin] and Mortimer, sittin' in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G...
-____- NOOO ... Almost put the x and the d together again there. This tax will surely help me :) I put that WAY too much :D That was difficult.
And we DON'T tax EVERYTHING XP Though.. There was something a while back about them thinking of window tax again oO
"You have a good view! *shoots and steals your money*" Like that.
Bleeding bunnies? oO
2008-01-01 [Eloura]: WOW!!Random!
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Hehe I know right? oO
2008-01-01 [Eloura]: lol very
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: What an exciting comment EL xp
2008-01-01 [Eloura]: Thanks!!!! Wait, where did yolu gt El? *wonders if everyon is passing it on to everyonelse* Epp!
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: I called you El a few comments back, or pages or something XP So BLERGH to you XP
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: Eloura: Lol i never noticed ^^' I've been being called it lately lol.
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: REALLY? Couldn't have anything to do with your username being 'Eloura' could it? XP
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: Yea it could, but i've had that name for a while, and now people are calling me it..
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Well YES -___-
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: I'm just curious why that NOW they call me it.
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Meh.. Suspicious uprising in crime? ;)
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: Must be!!!
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...?
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: That and it's all Morts fault!!! *laugghs*
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: oO Must be.. oO Nah I don't think it's Mort's fault ;)
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: I don't know it may be or it may be the chickens
2008-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I blame the inconspicuous shadowed guy in the corner... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yeh.. I forgot about him.. Good idea.., *glares at inconspicuous shadowed guy in the corner*
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: *laughs and points out the are no shadows*
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: There is always shadows around the inconspicuous shadowed guy in the corner. He makes the shadows. >>
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: But the are no shadows left... New lamps have built in shadow remover.
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Nope, incorrect I'm afraid lovey. He has a built in shadow remover-remover.
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: Damn.... I tried
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh.. Beat that Built In Shadow Removers! *shakes fist*
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: Wait! I got it, it's newest out and it's an all time shadow remover.
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Nah, won't work. That dude's shadow remover-remover is too powerful. It can go against it all. *shakes head*
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: *sighs* Damn shadow man... Lol i'll get him, i will!
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Nah, he's too inconspicuous.. We haven't actually been talking about him, cause we haven't really noticed him.
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: OHHHHHHHHHHH Okies!!!!
2008-01-01 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yeh ;) What? =O
2008-01-01 [~★~ gone~★~]: *laghs* ha I win
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Nah, not really ;)
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*a sudden massive explosion erupts in the lower bowels of hell*... Good ol' Satan! He's gotta get his bowels checked...


...*eats mrane*...
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... Interesting.. And yet bizarre! *nearly falls over* Damn Bacon.. *glares at the bacon on the floor*
Shhh.. I have a certain obsession for bacon, especially today oO
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*Bacon attacks from all directions*...*the big piece rapes you*...*you have small bacon bit children*...*eats bacon bit ramen*...
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: =O You're eating my babies! *shocked.. but not surprised* Is it tastey? =D
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: *laughs so hard she busts a gut*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: You should see a doctor about that!
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: I need a price check on Eloura's gut *says a mysterious voice from a sound box*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: *pokes the sound box* .. Clearly a bomb.. *throws out of the window to save the diner.. from it's millionth destruction*
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: Hey!!! I do. *voice box can be heard yelling* I also need a price check on Duke Devlin's Bacon bit babies


(i think i wanna add those two to the top, what prices should i put?)
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha make the prices up! XD We need to charge Mort for eating my babies, even if he does own the place XP
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: Lol ok!!!!!!! *goes off and does so*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: lolz.
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: *giggles* Done!
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Nice prices ;)
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: Thanks!! Ehh don't know i don't think your babies are priced quite right
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: I think that'll do for now ;)
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: You sure??? *thinks* Ok! *laughs*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Yes! =D Ooo~ I'm going to bed XP It's 02:30 or thereabouts, and I am tired, and have college work to do ><
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: A little coffee will wake you up!...*pours hot coffee all over your head*...*3rd degree burns appear all over your face*... You should really get that checked out...*eats merna*...
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: Good luck with the collegenesses!! *watches mort carefully*
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*you are suddenly stricken with the dreaded watching disease*...*you will die a slow and ridiculously painful death*...*you will also surrender all of your wordly posessions to me*...*tesa erman*...
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: *laughs and bows* But i am already the un dead!
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *lights you on fire*
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: *gggles* Feels good!
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*kicks you in the testicles*... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: *laughs* I don't have those
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*and yet, still manages to kick you there*...
2008-01-02 [Eloura]: *wondes why she feels nothing*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm.. Well, those thrid degree burns sre did wake me up ;) Thanks Mort XP *is wrapped in bandages*
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: It's a mummy! ...*shoots you with a shotgun*...
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Oh NO!!! *is shot.. falls over as it destroys my leg* .. Damn..
2008-01-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Hey Pen!! -tackles-
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs*... *lights the diner on fire*...
2008-01-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -puts fire out-
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: *hops out*
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of strippers burst in and start mudwrestling*
2008-01-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: O__o
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: *watches through the window* Odd..
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly, the gang of proffesional wrestlers burst in and suplex the strippers*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... Very odd..
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *the national guard bursts in and opens fire on the wrestlers*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: *laughs*
2008-01-02 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Pen...your brain scares me sometimes
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: It is a bit scary isn't it?
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *wolves burst in and attack the national guard*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: WOO! *cheers the wolves&*
2008-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *the plauge rats burst in and further infect the food*
2008-01-02 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm....
2008-01-03 [Eloura]: YUM!!!!
2008-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that's what she said!
2008-01-03 [Eloura]: Really? Oh i never knew. *laughs as phills diner catches on fire across the road*
2008-01-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey people!
2008-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *watches as the Misty traps go off catching Misty in their metal claws*... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-03 [Eloura]: *lets the misty out of the traps thinking the are Anit-Bob traps*
2008-01-03 [Duke Devlin]: Hmmm.... *laughs* .. Hey, why are your freeing Misty from the Misty traps? =O *shocked*
2008-01-03 [Eloura]: I thought they where the anti-bob traps. For those people who are anti bob's diner O.o *laughs*
2008-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope... anti-misty traps. You can tell by the big label on the side saying, "Anti-Misty Traps. For all your anti-Misty needs!"... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-04 [Eloura]: *laughs* I knew i missed something
2008-01-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in*awwwwwwww man you killed my clone,Damn!
2008-01-04 [Eloura]: *giggles*
2008-01-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sets anti-Mort traps*
2008-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *Anti-Mort gets caught in the trap*... Poor ol' Anti-Mort... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-04 [nokaredes]: Why does the Diner always have to have blood on the floor...?
2008-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: It matches the paint?
2008-01-04 [Duke Devlin]: I like it, adds character. Don't you think? ;)
2008-01-04 [Eloura]: I agree!
2008-01-04 [Duke Devlin]: Thought you might...
2008-01-04 [Eloura]: What it does character... *splashes some paint on the floor and say's* There's mine!
2008-01-04 [Duke Devlin]: No... Blood dear..
2008-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats penguin flavored ramen*
2008-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and violate Misty*
2008-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Misty's clone violates the pride of lions*
*the real Misty walks in*WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2008-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats Mortified Penguin flavored ramen*You taste good Mort
2008-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom tastes good... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-05 [Duke Devlin]: I bet she does. oO *eats bread ... and drinks tea* Yum.
2008-01-05 [Eloura]: I splashed i was repainting the wall
2008-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *plays Ghost Recon 2*... stinkin' Koreans...
2008-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats crumpets and drinks tea*
2008-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *pimp slaps Misty*... stop trying to be English!
2008-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have English in me ASSHOLE!
2008-01-06 [Eloura]: *watches carefully while she get duke devlin's bacon bit babies for a fresh and clearn garden salad she got elswhere*
2008-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2008-01-06 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *shakes head*
2008-01-06 [Eloura]: *twitches and giggles* FUN!
2008-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: From what I can tell, you got a little mule in you too... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-06 [Eloura]: HUH??? Ohhh Misty *eats her food*
2008-01-06 [Duke Devlin]: Ew.. Misty, if you don't live here, never have, don't have fully British parents.. Please don't claim to have British in you ;) It's insulting. Besides, you can't be British simply by eating CRUMPETS (Yeh, spell it right ;) ) and drinking Tea. Christ. XP
And OI! You should write just Duke, El, it's much easier :)
2008-01-06 [Eloura]: True duke is easier but when ordering food, you know they are picky.
2008-01-06 [Duke Devlin]: Pah, you never know who is picky nowadays ;)
2008-01-06 [Eloura]: True.
2008-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: My great grandpa and grandma were born in England,And sorry I forgot the E,don't make a big deal about,GOOD GRIEF!
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Yes, but that doesn't make you British ;) That is two generations above you, possibly three, so no - you are not British. And being born somewhere, doesn't make you that nationality either, it is your parents heritage that makes your nationality. Learn something dear.
And you should learn to spell check whatever you right before you post it, spelling errors are annoying. :)
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: yaeh!
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Thanks Mort :) If that was on my side XP
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: So... if your parent's heritage determines your nationality... then that means that Misty's alleged great grandmother's children were British. Since those alleged children were British, then that makes their children British as well. As those alleged children were also British, despite the fact that they were born in America ("being born somewhere, doesn't make you that nationality either"), then that makes their children British as well. So there you have it. Misty is now officially British. Suckers! Now she's your problem! *ships her over*... *she gets returned*... "Sir, do you have a license to ship cattle?"... *runs for it*...
2008-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmm..Duke you should use spell check,here is your comment,"And you should learn to spell check whatever you right before you post it, spelling errors are annoying. :)"It's spelled write I know you spelled it like that to prove a point though,and Mort stop being an asshole!
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Misty, I have one thing to say to you - how nice of you to suck up :)
And Mort, I refuse to take her. Think about what you said, none of it makes sense love. :) If my parents were jamaican, for example - which they are not, and I were born in Britain, I would be jamaican still, only I would live in Britain. Thus I am not English, but Jamaican. This is easy to understand, as my friend is English, yet he was born in Germany, to English parents.
So pah to you and your bad logic :)
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I care more about grammatical errors than spelling... not that adding ellipses after every sentence, followed by "eats ramen" enclosed in asterisks has ever been considered grammatically correct, but still... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Yes, grammatical errors are alot more annoying than spelling errors. Spelling can be explained away by typo's and lack of intelligence sometimes. Bad grammar, now that takes serious rule breaking to ruin. =( Ellipses isn't that bad, it's when people do overwhelmingly stupid things that it makes you want to rip your hair out. :)
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Bad logic? I disagree... my logic follows precisely what you were saying. I am merely saying that if having parents of a certain nationality means that you too are that same nationality, regardless of where you live, then that means your kids will also be whatever nationality you are (which is basically what you said). And if said kids were the same nationality as you, then that means their kids will be the same as you, and as will their kids, and so forth. The fact that Misty has a British great grandmother would mean that every generation after her, as well as before her, would have to be British. Unless, of course, we start crossbreeding... but that's an argument for a later time, my son... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Misty didn't say that her great-grandparents were British, merely that they were born in Britain, which, like we have agreed - clearly, does not make them British.
I like this Mort, he is leaving long comments that make sense and don't insult! =O
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, stupid face! Now, where was I... I believe we can all just agree that we're "Pangeans" and nothing else.
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Unless, of course, you take into account the origins of the universe... then we may have been formed somewhere else... so... we're called "Universians"... for sure. Maybe.
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Stupid face? That is the worst insult I have ever seen! It's even written incorrectly. XP (To be right, and to actually have the word 'stupid' affect the word 'face', there would need to be a hyphon. XP At the moment it reads 'stupid.. face' like that in natural speech. XP)
And yeh, we should all just claim to be Universians. :)
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: You'd know, wouldn't you...? stupid face.
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Haha. Yes, I would know, because I know the English language XP
Sorry, I just like to antagonise her. It is way too easy to annoy her and make her type in all capitals. Doing that is just so amusing. ^^
2008-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*I was born in Idaho,and no I'm not a ho.
2008-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... typically ho's have to be somewhat attractive, or else they don't get paid...
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh, shame that. :)
2008-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever.
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: That was a lovely, detailed response :)
2008-01-07 [Eloura]: *rolls eyes* You guys try to confuse me on purpose...
2008-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: Did you read it? :D
2008-01-07 [Eloura]: Most of it. Sorry not awake.. *pouts and can't have anything on the list*
2008-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: *steals ramen and pouts when can't eat it*
2008-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the bowl of ramen from my other hand*
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: *pouts unhappily*
2008-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha!
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: NOT FAIR!!! I want FOOD! This is a diner how can someone starve in a diner.... >.<
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: When they have a whole in their tooth, and they can't eat cause of it.. XP *eats a slice of bacon*
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]: I have a whole bunch of teeth and I can eat just fine. *wants bacon right about now*
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: I have all of my teeth, none have cavities or any of that shit XD I eat all good. ^^ *throws bacon to Pillowthief*
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]: And Im just Human. Dont give me any of that Universialians crap.
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: Well blah to you Thief. XP
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]: *eats bacon*
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]: (Pst. You missed the jab about spelling 'hole' wrong)


Harpoon!
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: Haha I will live.
*is harpwn'd* DX Oh noes.
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]:   
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: XD Thats an awesome picture. XP
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]: I just whipped it up real quick. Its from a Saturday Night Live skit called "Harpoon Man". Its BA.
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: BA? oO Well, it's awesome XD
2008-01-08 [Pillowthief]: Thats short for Bad Ass, by the way. Not a big watcher of Dane Cook, are you.
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: No, I'm not :)
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: BA rocks. I know someone who named their cat that. Also it's a wittle ittty bitty TINY hole... Not my fault.. I took care of them and also i have something called soft teeth...
2008-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: Aww well that sucks El.
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: *nods* It does... *pouts waiting for antibiotics to kick in and grumbles around*
2008-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Just call me BAMF. ...*eats ramen*... *a miniature battle rages on in my ramen bowl*... *captain Rehab harpoons his arch rival... the Black Whale, Moby Prick*... *eats Queequeg*...
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: *laughs watching the battle* Call you BAMF??? WHy??
2008-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Why not...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-08 [Eloura]: I don't know I just know realised what it ment lol sorry ^^' *eats ham and dumplings*
2008-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*a sudden massive eruption is heard from the treacherous pit of the supposedly dormant Mt. Wanahakaloogy, the little-known Hawaiian volcano (or, in this case, a rip-off of the one in "Finding Nemo")*... Satan's acting up again. You would think that a demon would die after getting shot 23 times with a holy 9mm... I better use the twelve gauge this time...*gets sanctified shotgun from the diner wall*...I shouldn't leave these up here...*eats demon-flavored ramen*...
2008-01-09 [Eloura]: *laughs and pulls a 12 gauge shotgun from another wall and say's* Don't worry i acualy know how to shoot with one of these!
2008-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2008-01-09 [Duke Devlin]: Love it.. DragonBall Z <3 Super Saiyan Goku! ^^
2008-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I think I made his hair too short... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-09 [Duke Devlin]: Ah, it's still pretty good >=D
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7qKD-Ph7ds
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: I'll look in the morning, I'm in my bed and things load slowly when I'm in my room. -___-
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuure... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: It doesn't.. I think it's something to do with the boiler being in the way. XD
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Stinkin' boiler...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: I know! Tell you what, I will click the link ;) And see if it will load. Damn that boiler.
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: It worked! Really quick loading.. oO And it was awesome XD Make me laugh.. Or try to ;) (whenever I laugh, I cough XD)
2008-01-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...you're dying.
2008-01-10 [nokaredes]: Whatever [Duke Devlin] has, I've got too, 'cause I do the same thing ._.
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: It's not nice, is it Nok? So shut up Mort. XP
2008-01-10 [Eloura]: *watches the mysterious conversation between and apple and an orange*
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=51cvw9Lbkyo ...part two at last!
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...of three, that is. Stupid [spitfire_35121]... too lazy to ever finish uploading it...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Damn them.. Whoever they are... *shakes fist*
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Is that a thinly veiled disguise of one of your clone houses? XP
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... them. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-10 [Eloura]: Do i even wanna watch?
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: DO IT!!! *brain washes you* >=D
2008-01-10 [Eloura]: Can't slow comp :P *continues watching mysterious conversations between and apple and an orange*
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh NO excuse. XP I have a slow connection.. Fuck it. Read a couple of comments up. :)
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cucumber_sandwich
2008-01-10 [Eloura]: Yea well trust me this is very slow, i'll read it at school.
2008-01-10 [nokaredes]: Tell someone to fix "hilarious" in the summary, pl0x...
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: That was David... spelling isn't his strong point.
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Ah well, not everyone can spell.
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Cucumber Sandwich? XP
2008-01-10 [Eloura]: *is alone and bored*
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *the inconspicuous, shadowed guy in the corner glances up, then looks back down at his feet*
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: *watches the corner where no one is*
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Wrong corner! ...check one of the other seven.
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Woahs! *checks the others*
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Or maybe he's on one of the other floors... *gets in the elevator*...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Maybe.. *stalks you into the elevator, standing by the buttons*
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *the elevator turns out to just be the freezer*
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: Wow.. This elevator sure is cold. ><
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *it turns out the elevator was just in our imaginations*... I don't know why I decided to make this place 23 stories tall... and then not build any way to get to the 2nd story... oh well... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: It makes no sense.. Maybe everyone should just climb the outside of the building? *shrugs*
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... but then there's those spikes I built on the outside...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: True, true.. But that could always help them climb you know.
2008-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...if only I didn't cover them with grease... I don't know why I did that either... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-10 [Duke Devlin]: You are quite strange, but if it keeps those damn climbers and jumpers away.. *shakes fist*
2008-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *it doesn't*
2008-01-11 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... *watches the climbers and jumpers* Oh hot damn..
2008-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *the corpses pile up*... *glances around*... *throws them in the freezer for later*
2008-01-11 [Duke Devlin]: Meh.. I'm sure a few corpses will do us good.. >_> <_<
Maybe not.. -___-'
2008-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats a whatchamacarcus sandwich*...
2008-01-11 [Duke Devlin]: ... Nice. *raises eyebrows and eats a couple of my babies*
2008-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... bacon... how many of those did you have?!
2008-01-11 [Duke Devlin]: Loads.. So many.. I couldn't even count.. *shakes head, while chomping on one*
2008-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats a whole piece of bacon!*
2008-01-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: hey...
2008-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok please don't annoy me I'm not in the greatest of moods
2008-01-11 [Duke Devlin]: Then why come here? You know you just get antagonised and annoyed. XP
2008-01-11 [Eloura]: *goes over and sits by the shadow guy in the corner* I'm bores, you?
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *he turns away*
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: *yawns and consumes a small block of ice*
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that was a dry ice cube!
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Shame.. It tasted so good.. *sighs mournfully*
2008-01-12 [Pillowthief]: *eats baconator with extra bacon* Yum.
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Sounds tasty.. *grins and consumes yet another dry ice cube*
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...darn you, Wendy's! ...you and Dave Thomas have crossed me for the last time!
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs a sanctified crossbow off the wall and leaps out the window*
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: *watches with vague interest* .. *chomps the ice* .. Bizarre..
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: *tries to make the shadow man feel happier*
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: I wouldn't bother.. You are trying to make someone that doesn't want to be noticed, happier.. *shakes head* Drawing attention won't help. XP
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: But I'M BORED...>
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Meh. You'll live. XP
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: No i won't.. I'll DIE of boredom
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Nah, you won't. XP Have this stick.. It's magic, stops boredom.. *passes you a manky stick*
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: *pouts and has a tantrum and breaks stick on accident*
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Silly child.. *scolds*
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: *pouts more though trys to look chastied* Not a child.
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Good... we can try you as an adult. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: I'M A TEENAGER!. I am neither a child nor an adult.
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: That is true unless you are 18 or 19.
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: Which i'm not. *smiles* 17 is a safe age to me.
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm 17.
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: Awesome, then they can't try either of us as adults in here.
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah,unless Mort says that 17 year olds are considered adults then I guess not.
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: He will just to annoy us LOL
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah I know.
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: Why is mort like that?
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not really sure,I guess he doesn't get enough atention(sp?) at home.
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know... he's such a loser... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ummmmmmm...dude we're talking about you.
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Maybe, he doesn't care Misty. :) Ever get that impression from Mort? That he doesn't GIVE A DAMN, because he DOESN'T KNOW YOU, or most likely CARE what you have to say? =O
MAYBE? XP




And Woah to the god-playing back in the days or comments page number 890
2004-10-30 White Wolf guardian of snow and ice: -she jumps up and puts her hands around his neck pinning him up to the wall- -her teeth are just a few inches away from his neck- [you're not worth my time] -she toses him to the side and sits down at a table-
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm.....I don't remember that comment.
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: You know mort reminds me of this guy at my school, acts the same way. LOL
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Another XD WOAHS!!! He ate just chinese food.. Not Ramen in particular!! Scary stuff peoples.. (I'm looking at old comments, before you or I joined Misty, so You wouldn't remember them)
2004-11-05 Mortified Penguin: ......*eats chinese food*.......
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: *stares shocked* Oh my. ANd cha another lol! Only worse..
2008-01-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh,my bad.*laughs nervously*
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Lol @ you.. Not in a bad way.. For once. XD :)
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: There's some disturbing comments if you actually read 'em all... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Heh... I remember ol' kristin's fanclub... *eats ramen*... gooood times.
2008-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: There really is.. I only got to around 860, since it was six am, and I hadn't slept since the previous six am XD I saved it to favourites to look at later. XD
2008-01-12 [Eloura]: *laughs* Your reading them ALLL wow yor going to be busy.
2008-01-12 [Pillowthief]: *yawn* Whatever happened to that ninja bard?
2008-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks the corpse pile*... hmm... I don't see him in here... who knows... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [~★~ gone~★~]: Wow... i miss alot on here... *steals mot's ramen*
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mot...? ...MOT?! ........*eats chinese food*......*throws viagra around*.....SCREW YOU, HOOOKEEEEERRRRSSS!!
2008-01-13 [~★~ gone~★~]: Last time i looked i wasn't a hooker *looks again* Nope.
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Riiiiiiight... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-01-13 [Pillowthief]: Who's Mot??
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably some Indian guy... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [Eloura]: *appears and drops a bag of sugar on mot's head* HAHAHHAH I WIN!!!
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Happy birthday Pen!!
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *sticks thumb up*... *eats ramen*... s'up, wolfy?
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmm....WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?!
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: nothing much Pen'ol boy! -tackles-
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *self-destructs*
2008-01-13 [Eloura]: *smiles* Hey Penguin Happy B-day *laughs as penguin's tackled*
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you all... you're four days too late! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [Eloura]: Ohhhh welll!!
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I'm sorry! I was studying for midterms, I still am -gives Pen a cake made out of frosting flavored ramen- better?
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...What?! ...darn you and your strange cakes... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ....you don't want the cake -puppy dog eyes-
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: S- sure I do! ...*puts it in the garbage... for later!*...
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -grabs garbage can and dumps it and cake all over Pen- That's what I get for being nice to you -throws trash can at him-
2008-01-13 [Eloura]: *laughs at mort and sit's on mot's head*
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh great... now you dumped it on the floor... now I can't eat it... I hope you're happy... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Never happier -pouts at bar-
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh... okay. Glad to see you so happy! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -laughs- Pen you're rediculace and it's fantastic-
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: Haha at least I got the B-Day around the right time. XP Haha might have been the day after.. Dunno. XD
*stares at Mot* .. You look like an immitation Mort.. 00
2008-01-13 [Pillowthief]: Who the hell is Mot??
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: Some crazy indian dude I thin.
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: Some crazy indian dude I think.
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol you guys are crazy,and I think it's funny.
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: WOAHS! Who's crazy now!? =O
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: huh?
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons Mot*
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Hillary might win!
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Duke,are you calling me crazy?
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: But Mike Huckabee is Chuck Norris approved... I don't know what will happen!
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmm...
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: No I wasn't, I asked who was crazy. XP
I know little of your politics over there.. But I know enough to not want Hillary to win. DX
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh I was saying that Mortified Penguin was crazy and it's funny,and who cares if Hillary wins or not?
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Who cares?!
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: yeah,who cares?
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: ME! Then.. My lovely American friends will have the Crazy person. I assume that they are crazy.. I don't know them XD
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm too young to vote so I can't really decide who is president or not.
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You may be too young to vote, but that doesn't mean you're too young to get killed by terrorists! ...and, depending on whether or not they got my email about you, you will. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes* Yeah and I e-mailed ninjahs and they should kill you when they get it.
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: Darn them and their slow connections. XP Hehe
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*whatever.
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: The ninjas all know you have bad credit... they'd never accept a hit offer from you.
2008-01-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have good credit
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *the IRS bursts in and tackles Misty*... you know... I think they're getting a little desperate... *they start punching her*...
2008-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: PAH. You just said that you aren't old enough to vote? Anyone under that age clearly has bad credit ^^
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *is bored*... *harpoons Devlin*...
2008-01-13 [Eloura]: I'm old enough to vote by the time it's election day. And i will not vote for her. She wants to get rise of guns. Which meansthere goes the 4-H shooting club... SOOO I don't want herto get it. *jumped off mots head before harpooned* Hey mort You didn't kill mot...
2008-01-13 [Xeroh Kanoe]: 
2008-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses Mot in the garbage compactor*... *he starts shouting for some guy named Artoodeetoo and Seethreepeo to stop it, but it's too late...*
2008-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: *is harpooned* *continues to Talk* .. She sounds lovely.
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...[Xeroh Kanoe] hasn't been here in years!
2008-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: AHHHH Someone I don't know! *runs away*
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm...
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *shakes head no* she's not sadly... *laughs as a robot shows up to blow up bob's diner*
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I've been on checking stuff on and off, I just haven't made any comments.
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: hello [Xeroh Kanoe],How are you today?
2008-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: Woahs.. Well hi to the person I don't know :D <3
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *seconds duke's comment*
2008-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: *is seconded*
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *giggles*
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Apparently no one is paying attention to the killer robot trying to blow the diner up... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws a bucket of ice water on the killer robot*
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: You're paying for that water!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0alpgJdrdPM
2008-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: *just watching the killer robot* .. Wow.. I havem't looked at this wiki since ten past midnight, and it is now quarter to two.. And 6 comments? XD
OMFG I hear MORTAL COMBAT
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *appears watching the robot blow up* Lol Funny robot!!!
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Anywho, how many people went to  Because me eating is dependent on how many people go there.
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: Does it need fast internet.. >.<
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ^^ It's an article I wrote for the web page. It's about all of Nintendo's past consoles. It's some of the best I've ever wrote, and that includes my stories.
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *smiles* Ok! I'll try to get a chance to read it.
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Plus my pay is dependent on how many views it gets. I'm going to try to publish another thing but I can't think of a topic...
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *nods* I wish you good luck.
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ^^ Thanks.


I've got it! I'll make a short story about Bob's Diner!
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: Awesome!!!!!!!!!!
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: If you make a story about Bob's Diner, I'll guarantee you 100+ views on your publications.
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *nods* Everyone i know will veiw it if i have anything to say about it!!! ^^'
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: I have a setting and characters, now I just need a storyline...
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Not that anyone would care... and despite the fact that it has nothing to do with games, I'm sure the owner of that website would allow it! ...Yeah! ......*eats ramen*...... whatever happened to ol' Mot...? I miss that guy...
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: The articles can be about anything, gaming is just something I really like. And as long as nothings copyrighted then it should be fine.
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: So I see... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *mot pulls himself together fro the ramains pile and stands up shakes himself and harpoons mort* Anyway, that sounds good, maybe i can help, or mort can help with the storyline?
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: That would be great. Once I get started I'll get on a roll so all I need is a little nudge to start and then a small push here or there near the end. And you all will get deserved credit.
2008-01-14 [Eloura]: *thinks* There's so many idea's!
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: But we only need one to put this place on the map.


Is this place accessible to not logged in people?
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I think so,I think Turkey did it once but I'm not sure.
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Then I'll link it back to this place. More influx of members for ET, more money in my pocket to by gpotatoes with.
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I visited the link in your house btw.
2008-01-14 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ^^ Thanks. Did you read it? 'Cause it single-handedly won the 'Nintendo sucks, no it doesn't' argument in favor of Nintendo.
2008-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes. Yes it is accessible.
2008-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes I did read it.
2008-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: More reads for you Ryu :)
2008-01-15 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Duke, you're the one who left a comment aren't you?
2008-01-15 [Duke Devlin]: Yep... Why? =O
2008-01-15 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Cause I wanted to say thank you for the good review, now go! And spread the link like a virus across then internet! Mwahahahahahahah


That's actually not a bad idea...*starts to make a virus that'll cause computers to go to said link when ever accessed*
2008-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: David did some slight editing...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neqafemR6bg
2008-01-15 [nokaredes]: It was once believed that Chuck Norris actually lost a fight to a pirate, but that is a lie, created by Chuck Norris himself to lure more pirates to him. Pirates never were very smart.
2008-01-15 [Eloura]: (to ryu) I went to leave a comment and it said it had a bad string.. I'll try again later.
2008-01-15 [Duke Devlin]: Haha XD That's brilliant Nok XD
2008-01-15 [Duke Devlin]: Woah the wiki shrank 00
2008-01-15 [sunabozu]: *turns into a milk hungry puppy*
2008-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *pours boiling milk on [sunabozu]*... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-16 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... Looks a mite hot down there.. *peering at the now puddle-ized [sunabozu]* ...
2008-01-16 [Eloura]: *almost walsk through the puddled [sunabozu]* Ohh hello!
2008-01-16 [sunabozu]: *little puppy starts to cry but then says mmm*
2008-01-16 [Eloura]: *giggles quietly poking the puddle*
2008-01-16 [Duke Devlin]: .... ..... *Elipses*
2008-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hey! Those are copyright to the Mortified Penguin Company!
2008-01-16 [Duke Devlin]: Haha XD Sure they are.. oO XP
Only if '*eats ramen*' follows them...
2008-01-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ... © Mortified Penguin Co. 2008
2008-01-17 [Duke Devlin]: ........ Okay. XD
2008-01-18 [~★~ gone~★~]: *pushes Eloura in the puddle* haha
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: *is covers in a person and bites gracie*
2008-01-18 [~★~ gone~★~]: Ow
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: *giggles and shakes [sonabozu] off her body* Grrr *shivers*
2008-01-18 [~★~ gone~★~]: Haha *pokes [Eloura]*
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: *pokes back and bites again* Whahahahahah *smirks*
2008-01-18 @Not logged in user@: oh no you didn't *bits back and then runs away*
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: Hey!!!! Wait.. >.< Who Bit Me??????????? *follows*
2008-01-18 [~★~ gone~★~]: I did but it didn't work.
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: I noticed. O.o *bites back and giggles*
2008-01-18 [Duke Devlin]: Ehhhhhh =O
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-01-18 [~★~ gone~★~]: *giggles*
2008-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: *eats cup-o-noddle*
2008-01-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey,WAS THAT TURKEY!*points at a streak that just flew by*
2008-01-18 [Eloura]: *shakes head no* thay was gracie *shrugs* It wouldn't let her sign in ^^'
2008-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Turkey died... his last words were "Tell Misty that I... I hate her." ...then he croaked... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*stop with your lies Mortified Penguin.
2008-01-19 [Duke Devlin]: It might NOT have been lies! And he might NOT have meant YOU Misty! He could just have easily have meant that damned Misty character from that Pokémon show that was on when I was a kid! XD
2008-01-19 [Eloura]: *hides form war that will start*
2008-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope. He was talking about her. But he did say something about "seeing Brock in hell"... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-19 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh, makes sense.. ;) I don't see why he would have meant the pokémon one anyway. XD
2008-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you people! Stop not commenting! (the means you, pillowthief and nokaredes and traveling bard and Chuck Norris!)
2008-01-19 [Duke Devlin]: ... I'll comment TOO. >>
2008-01-19 [Eloura]: COMMENT COMMENT COMMENT
2008-01-19 [Duke Devlin]: PAHHHH YOU YOU ALLL!!! OMFG... *runs off to play Baldurs Gate retro styleee*
2008-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... what's with all the commenting...? ...weirdos...
2008-01-20 [Duke Devlin]: OH my! Lame. XP How is everyone today?! This evening.. This early morning? This night!?!?!? >=D
2008-01-20 [Eloura]: This evening, is ok. *shrugs* *comments*
2008-01-20 [Duke Devlin]: Good.
2008-01-20 [Eloura]: Yeps.
2008-01-20 [nokaredes]: ...what, I have to comment here? I missed the memo.
2008-01-20 [Eloura]: Yea you didn't get one? WoW
2008-01-20 [Duke Devlin]: WOAH. I know.. He's so forceful! XD
2008-01-20 [Eloura]: I'm shocked Nok that you didn't cause i did.
2008-01-20 [nokaredes]: It must have gotten lost in the mail... a lot of my mail has been getting to me weeks after it should have, or not at all... I think it has something to do with my moving... and getting mail forwarded...
2008-01-20 [Eloura]: Yea that would do it.
2008-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *watches some Excel Saga*... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-20 [Duke Devlin]: ... *challenges Mort by watching... DBZ ^^ Bu Saga XD*
2008-01-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*Ok,I'm just gonna read in the corner.*goes to a corner and reads Manga*
2008-01-20 [Duke Devlin]: ... *reads 'Out' by Nastuo Kirino* ... *also 'My Booky Wook' by Russel brand*
2008-01-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *hurls a molotov cocktail at the corner where misty is*
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: ... *eyes up from her book(S) ,, Yes plural.. >_> <_<* .. Hmm... *drinks a 'Hot, Steaming cup of coffee', which she will pay fro in a bit* .. Yum. DX
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *the debt collecting wolverines burst in from the ground and tackle Duke Devlin*
2008-01-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *shakes head and goes back to reading her manga*
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty! Shave your mustache!
2008-01-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *looks up*I don't have facial hair.*goes back to reading*
2008-01-21 [Keir Devlin]: I don't think it's a mustache, really.
I think her eyebrows are just dropping down to her nose area.
=D
And, don't bother calling me a bitch.


I know it already. <3




LOVE


:3
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...it's Devlin 2! ...*eats ramen*... this Devlin seems a little more edgy...
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: Haha MY LOVE!!1 *huggles The Wife* XD Sorry Len XD
How'd you find this place? XP
<3
Bwahah NOW THERE IS TWO OF US >=D
2008-01-21 [Eloura]: *is lost and dies on sceene* Bleh I feel so sick, and it's all my fault also.
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: ... HAHAHAHHA >=D
2008-01-21 [Eloura]: *grumbles* Grrr
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: .... XD Wtf.. GRRRR Right back atcha. :)
Aww doesn't the presence of mah Len just bring out the worse side in me? XD
2008-01-21 [Eloura]: I errrh guess. *grrs again and yawns* Thank the goodness of life that today's almost over.
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: ... Mine IS over. XD Well.. Not really. It's ten past seven in the evening. -___- And no rp.. *sniffle*
2008-01-21 [Eloura]: Awwww.
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *adds a casino to make B's D more attractive*... who wants to bet that Misty gets a boyfriend? It pays 200 to 1!
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *builds some slots and a black jack table*
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: ... I ain't betting on that... *laughs* ;)
2008-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *reads the best of bob: volume 1*... even though it's mostly Turkey's crap... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-21 [Duke Devlin]: Oooo a wiki to look at ^^ <3 XD Wtf..
2008-01-21 [Eloura]: I need to read that... >.>
2008-01-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen-
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Pens, huh? ...I prefer pencils... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-22 [Keir Devlin]: ;D I find things at random, my dearest.
2008-01-22 [Eloura]: *blinks* I'm not asking...
2008-01-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: ...Pen, you know I'm the only one who refuses to call you...that other name that everyone else uses to refer to you! ^.^
2008-01-22 [Eloura]: *shivers* Hiya everyone.
2008-01-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -tackles eloura- hello love!
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *sells Bob's Diner to some foreign business men*
2008-01-22 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: WTF!?
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*they change the name to Dhabi's Diner*... *some Arabic music plays*... *eats sabanak*...
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *a group of guys wearing turbins walk in and order some goat milk*... *they discuss mid-eastern politics*...
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I remember when I first got banned... ah... gooood times. ...*eats ramen*...


2004-11-17 nether_dragonfly: i spoke with the gaurds about him. he will be baned if the gaurds recive one more complaint about him.


2004-11-17 Lerune: Yep, and he was asked not to comment on this wiki anymore. Period.


2004-11-17 nether_dragonfly: *looks at all the blood that came from nc's head so many times* but im gunna miss this when it is cleaned.


2004-11-17 Adnama: Ooo. :o The plot thickens. Will he be banned then? :3


2004-11-17 Lerune: Done.


2004-11-17 Adnama: Mwaha! XP Wonderful secret service comment! :B


2004-11-17 Kiss of Betrayel: ...


2004-11-17 Lerune: He started sending ME those comments, so I felt it needed to be noted. =oP


2004-11-17 nether_dragonfly: *hugs Lerune* YAY!! TANKEES!!
2008-01-22 [Eloura]: *is squashed br wolfies and say's* Hi love, and WTF what happened here??? It was sold!!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: You're too good at finding stuff Lenny XD <3
2008-01-22 [Keir Devlin]: D
'Cause I'm a freaky stalker and hunt you down.
xD
JK
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: :D
*is stalked* ^^
You are the only one I'd let stalk me! XD
jk
:)
Maybe. XD
^^
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: If Bob's Diner is owned by Islams, then radical Islamic bombers won't feel the need to bomb us... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *a Jewish guy bursts in through the window with a bomb strapped to him*
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Sh*t.
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: *is in mourning*
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Did your self-esteem finally croak? ...*eats ramen*... Mine did a long time ago... *points at tombstone out back*... mmm... tombstone pizza......
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha! My self-esteem was already shit. No, I am in mourning for our dear Heathy-Love. DX Heath Ledger <3 Poor guy. DX Unless he committed suicide, then he's a twat.
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: The Heath Ledger?!
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: ... YES. Who the hell do you think Mort? DX
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Really?! ...who's the Heath Ledger...? ...perhaps I should just read this here MSN article... *eats ramen*... "Death may be drug related..."
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: XD ... =( *sniffles and hides in the uninhabited corner*
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...he was going to be the Joker?! ...darn... first Bobby Fisher... now old Heathcliff... what's this world coming to...? ...I don't know, but I hope it has ramen... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: How many corners does this place have?!! ...*counts*... oh yeah... seven...
2008-01-22 [Duke Devlin]: He.. WAS the Joker.. ='( I love the Joker <3
*has now dedicated her house to him <3* DX
<3
... It has ramen.. *from her corner*
2008-01-23 [Keir Devlin]: XD I read that at school.
Awww, I ish a la sorry, Stephy-Kiins... D:
I'm sure he will vist your dreams. xD
2008-01-23 [Duke Devlin]: DX
<3
He didn't =( *sniffle*
I will live.. I still have my Tommy <3 XP
<3
2008-01-23 [Keir Devlin]: Tommy..?xD
2008-01-23 [Duke Devlin]: .. TOM FELTON! Pshaw to your fan-ness XD
<3 jk ;)
2008-01-24 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Bob's Diner story update: It has been started! Other than that there's one small announcement, Penguin, because your name here is slightly...odd, it shall be changed to Morty the Penguin, an actual penguin and also the owner of Bob's Diner. Eloura, would you mind being a waitress(name'll stay.)? Duke, you'll be a regular customer, Keira'Don Devlin, I just learned of your existence so I'll have a place for you in just a few days. That's all. (since I'm going of name's here, you might be wondering what my name'll be, it's James Kerri.)
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What about Wolfy, Nok, Pillow, whoever else comes here, and Ex-Manager Turkey?
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: As well as the penguin's younger twin brothers, [playa101] and [lightmage].
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and then there's ol' [sara(:]... who, for some reason, has been here longer than me...
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and don't forget our MIA chef, [PixieStickChick]... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: And the chickens... and the lions... and the long time "vice manager" [spitfire_35121]... oh yeah... and that frickin' Misty guy...
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and our ex-waiters/business competitors, [Angelic nightmares] and [xXTwilightXRose Xx]... and ol' [swabloo]... whatever happened to that guy...? ...*eats ramen*... and whatever happened to that akiratetsuo chick...? ...I think she's [Leelo] nowadays...
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...then there was [Rolo]... an early business associate of the Diner...
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and [Lethan]... who I haven't seen in a few days...
2008-01-24 [Keir Devlin]: XD IKNEWTHAT!!!!!
TOM!
Love!
;D
2008-01-24 [Eloura]: Hey Ryu I'll be ok with that ^'
2008-01-24 [nokaredes]: ...s/he forgot a lot of people. I wouldn't care much, but one of them was me, so I'm kind of offended.
2008-01-24 [Duke Devlin]: TOM LOVE <3
Awww man. =( I don't wanna be a regular customer. *sniffle*
2008-01-24 [Duke Devlin]: TOM LOVE <3
Awww man. =( I don't wanna be a regular customer. *sniffle*
But I will live.
2008-01-24 [Eloura]: *blinks and sends confetti in the air*
2008-01-24 [~★~ gone~★~]: what's going on?
2008-01-24 [Duke Devlin]: ...Nothing.
2008-01-24 [~★~ gone~★~]: okay...
2008-01-24 [Eloura]: *throws confetti at the gracie and runs*
2008-01-24 [~★~ gone~★~]: Hey!!!
2008-01-24 [sunabozu]: *screams in pain*ITS IN MY EYES!!!!!!!!!
2008-01-24 [Eloura]: Awww I sorry Suna *returns hiding from gracie in a dirty glass*
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you... did you have to put glass in that confetti?!
2008-01-24 [Eloura]: Huh glass?? *is IN a dirty glass*
2008-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]:    Whilst playing around with some stuff on Elftown, I managed to implant a "Delete" button on another wiki, but all it did was say "You don't have the right error."... now I've got to see if I can get around that... but most likely I'll just give up and go eat some ramen... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-24 [Duke Devlin]: .. Sounds fun! XD
2008-01-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude,I'm a girl.hmmmmmmmmmmm...*smiles evily*I wonder...?*hangs a pic of Tom and Emma in a corner and throws darts at it and hits Emma everytime*Filthy whore!
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Don't cover up the Misty dart board!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: .. Good, but maintain distance from Tom!
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *blinks coming back in the room and say's* Whoa what i miss ^^'
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Dunno. I only just got back.. NOTHING.
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: Ahh ok! *kills the pink that is now her background*
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *is on fire*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear.. *buys some water, then throws it over Mort*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *charges you 100 bucks for that water*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *writes an evil write up about how bob's diner doesn't charge enough*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: *throws $100 at Mort in payment* SO.., how's those burns coming along?
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: Lol
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *is on fire again*... The burns are doing great... it's my skin I'm worried about.
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: .. Oh damn. I can't afford another lot of water for you.. *sighs and watches you burn*
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *burns*... *is now a pile of ashes*... *is an ashhole*...
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: .... Oh damn. Now who will run the place? ... >=)
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: I WILL!!!!!!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Nah.. *already signed up and stolen the job*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: NOT FAIR!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *is a ghost*... *flies in through the walls*... avenge me!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Bwahahah >=D *runs the place* ... We'll avenge you for the fire.. BUt someone DOES need to run the place now.. *grins* >=F
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *smirks* I WILL!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: ... I ALREADY DO NOW! God read the comments. XP
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *raises eyebrow* I ment avenge Mort *blinks*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oohhhhh RIGHT! XD GO FOR IT!! >=F
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *laughs and then wonders why bob's diner is pink*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: ... Yeh I wonder why bob's diner is pink.. Good thing 'Bob's Diner' isn't.. >=D
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: O.o *kills the pink killing bob's diner*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Phew.. That was close. *wips brow*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *nods* Yepps!!! *laughs then screams* IT'S COMING BACK!!!!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: OH NO!!! *throws pieces of old broken Peter's Diner at it*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *watches it squeek* KEEP THROWING!!! *attacks it, and ends up getting hurt by old peices of peter's diner and is bleeding as pink retreats for a bit*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear.. *watches, too lazy to fight more*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *bleeding to death in Bob's Diner and the pink attacks*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear.. *has taken initiative and moved Bob's Diner underground for the moment, until the battle is over*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *the pink attacks her body eating her alive, even underground her screams could be heard*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: ... Oh dear.. For the millionth time. *grins and resurrects Bob's Diner, now the pink has stopped attacking, having received it's penance* >=D
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *ghostly self wanders bob's diner*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Woahs... *calls the 'GhostBustersTM'*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *laughs at you when they don't show up*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear. *shrugs and calls the 'GhoulBusters', who then show up and kick yo' ass*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *who i then half run from saying* But I just wanna order some food :P
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: You are a Ghoul.. You can't eat! *laughs raucously*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: Not a ghoul I ish a very solid ghost *smirks and pokes you* So HA!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Hahahaha UNlikely. *darts away before you poke me!*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *chases you trying to poked you* VERY LIKELY!!! Why do you think the 'GhostBustersTM'Never came? Cause i to solid a ghost!!
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: ... Riiiight. The GhostBustersTM never came cause they have been here before, and idn't like me. *sobs*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: Really my reason is correct *huggles you proving it*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: ... No. Don't 'huggle' me. >>
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *laughs huggleing more* WHy not???
2008-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks down the door*... *bursts in with an AK-47 in both hands*... *starts randomly shooting into the crowd*... *eats ramen*...
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: The 'croud'.. Oh dear, poor 'croud'. *sighs and sits down wearily*
2008-01-26 [Eloura]: *thought mort was a ghost also*
2008-01-26 [Duke Devlin]: Not anymore! :D
2008-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not the only Mort there is... in fact, there are twelve of us in this very diner! *Morts wave from various locations*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *Laughs and say's* Now i understand!!!
2008-01-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: OMG
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *blinks* He's not here at the moment can i take a message?
2008-01-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmm...
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *jots that down* Ok.
2008-01-27 Cam: Hello people,will you please take my best friends poll,
2008-01-27 Kelly: Yes,please take our friend's poll,
2008-01-27 God: I have receieved the message [@52157],thank you.
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: Your welcome god, *nods and sits at the reception desk*
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: Oh that's alright then! :D
Woah! Hi God. *grins and waves*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *waves at god from reception desk and laughs saying* I think god has left the building.
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: OH shame. Don't worship him anyway. *grins*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *nods agreeing* He's never around when you need him anyway.
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: Yep. It's cause he's crap.
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *shrugs and takes a message* Well everyone seems to think this is his answering machine...


Dear God:


I regret to inform you that you car innsurance is due. You now owe 8,292.87 please pay this by January 28, 2008. Our office hours are 9-5. Our phone number is 999-200-1857. Please call if you have any questions.


Tracy Gavin


Do you see what i mean..
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear, that must be irritating. Ooo His car insurance is due the same day as my brother's birthday!
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: You have NOOO idea hiw irritating it gets. *sighs* Very.. Awww Happy early B-Day to your brother. *smiles and yells* GOD COME GET YOUR MESSAGES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: Heheh I shouted it to my brother for you. And God sucks, he ignores his messages and doesn't return them! =(
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: Thank you! I really hope he has a good one! *smiles and nods* Never returns his messages, nor ever returns them... *pouts* He's evil..
2008-01-27 God: I do always return my messages, thank you. *reads bill for car insurance and yells* JESUS DID YOU WREAK MY CAR AGAIN........... *say's crossly*
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: He is evil. Shut up God. >>
2008-01-27 God: I SHALL NOT BE TOLD TO SHUT UP... I AM GOD! *lightning cracks outside the window*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *comes back in and say's* I go to lunch for *checks watch* Not even half an hou and you two are argueeing....
2008-01-27 God: *eats ramen* You had to go out to eat.
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: ... *Ahem* .. Bob's Diner doesn't have windows. *points to the wallspace*
2008-01-27 God: Ahhh but young sir, that's where your wrong. There is a window on the door of bob's diner *points to door and to lightning* Soo Bob'd Diner has 1 window. *eats ramen*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: I'm not commenting anymore... You two are crazy.
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: ... I am not a sir.. Bob'd Diner may have 1 window, but Bob's Diner has none. I assure you.
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *laughs and say's* God's been silly!
2008-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the non-existant window with a bomb strapped to his chest*
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: OH DEAR! *runs and hides under a table*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *attacks the bomb* RARH!!
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: ... That was silly. *watches the explosion*(
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *laugh standing beside you watching an android of me get blown up*
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: .. You have too many clones. *laughs at you who will be destroyed by them in the year 2009*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *laughs because she will be destroyed by them tomorrow*
2008-01-27 [Duke Devlin]: .... *ignores*
2008-01-27 [Eloura]: *pouts*
2008-01-28 [Pillowthief]: All your Base are belong to us.
2008-01-28 [Eloura]: HUH??? O.o?
2008-01-28 [Duke Devlin]: I knew it! *runs off*
2008-01-28 [Eloura]: *ish scared so hides in a brand new tube sock*
2008-01-28 [Duke Devlin]: .... Woahs.
2008-01-28 [Eloura]: *comes out of the tube sock and mrrs* I'ma kitty!
2008-01-28 [Duke Devlin]: Riiight.
2008-01-28 [Eloura]: *nods and laughs* Lol there's a story about that *hands you a gift and a giant cookie and say's* For your brother!! It's his birthday today! Right?
2008-01-28 [Duke Devlin]: Yep, that it is! XD *grins* Okay, so the story?
2008-01-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: Bob's Diner: The Story



I'm a guy by the way. I'll see if I can't work in some of those other people. Duke, what would you like to do in the story?
2008-01-28 [Xeroh Kanoe]: FYI: This story has become a writing assinment for my English class...
2008-01-28 [Duke Devlin]: Of course! :D Sorry XD I dunno! XD
2008-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn pirates! Jacking my base!
2008-01-28 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear!
2008-01-28 [Keir Devlin]: -watches in amussment-
2008-01-29 [Duke Devlin]: OH MY! *watches in amusement you watching in amusement*
2008-01-30 [Keir Devlin]: XD WTF STEPH?! XD
2008-01-30 [Duke Devlin]: .... *is awesome* XD
2008-01-30 [Eloura]: O.o *watches all the randomness*
2008-01-30 [Duke Devlin]: ... *watches you watching the randomness*
2008-01-30 [Eloura]: *glares*My Watching!!
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm here!
2008-01-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *shakes head*You guys and girls are crazy.
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: of course!!!
2008-01-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: YAY!!
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *sits on a rocking chair on the porch*... *strums a banjo*... *chews on a piece of straw*... Now... let me tell y'all a story... back in dubya dubya two, I was a-ridin' in a plane over that there Germany... suddenly, we done got hit by somthin'. I don't rightly know what it was, but I always just assumed we got shot... or maybe we just hit one o' them big ol' pterydactol thangs... I guess I'll never really know... but anyway... there we was... fallin' to tha' ground. I took the jet pack that was sittin' beside me and tried to fly, but, o' course, it wus out o' fuel. I fell three hundred feet into a pile of jagged rocks... All I got was a bruise on my head where I first made contact... but that was no suprise... everyone knows things were generally tougher back in the good ol' days... back before Elvis and the Beatles and all that hippie crap... after that, I managed to take down fourty Germans before one of my buddies stopped me and told me we weren't in Germany yet... you see... It turns out we was still in the U.S... long story short, I ended up gettin' kicked out o' tha' army... *false teeth fall out*... *slurps some ramen*...
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: *listens intently*
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *banjo catches on fire*... dagnabit.
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: *buys water and get's the fire out*
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ............................that water's going to cost you.
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: I know ^^'
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Unless of course you purchase a Member of Bob's Diner Discount Card! .............................Which will also cost you.
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: I thought I owned one...? *shrugs* Ehh I'll buy one *nods*
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *charges you $1,000 bucks... plus a mandatory tip*
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: *pays the money shakily and give tip and say's* Soooo
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: No hablo inglés, señora. ¿Quiera comprar unas algunas naranjas?
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: I understood all of that but algunas naranjas *giggles* And I'm a senorita not a senora *can't make certain words*
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks you upside the head with a sack of oranges*... buy some oranges or my 23 children will die!
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: *steals oranges and hits you with them* Take care of your own children!!!!!!!
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *one of them dies*
2008-01-31 [Eloura]: Your own fault mort, need to keep "it" in you pants
2008-01-31 [nokaredes]: ...he does! But he keeps his hoes down there too!
2008-01-31 [Duke Devlin]: Haha that was brilliant Nok. XD
You have too many kids, they need to die. ;)
2008-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts my children into forced labor camps*... well... that settles that.
2008-02-01 [Eloura]: *laughs and say's with now lost look* Wait a minute you have more than 23 kids cause you put you kids in forced labor camps before O.o Wait.. How many kids do you have?
2008-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: How should I know...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-01 [Eloura]: You concieved them! You should know. *is acualy really eating ramen*
2008-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Ramen...? ...I hate that stuff... *eats a frickin' cheeseburger*...
2008-02-01 [Eloura]: Yes RAMEN!!!!!!!! *laughs and say's* MINE!!! *steals ramen from bob's diner*
2008-02-01 [Duke Devlin]: He is male, thus doesn't really need to know how many kids he has! XD That's more our job El. We are the females.. Though we haven't had HIS kids.. I hope. ;)
2008-02-01 [Eloura]: *laughs* But we don't know all the females that has possibly been with him ^^' *giggles* I know I haven't been with him I hope YOU haven't
2008-02-01 [Duke Devlin]: ... I don't THINK I have. XD
:P
2008-02-01 [Eloura]: EITHER DO I Lol ^^'
2008-02-02 Amber Maine: Ello Love,how are you?
2008-02-02 Amber Maine: I think this limerick, by [@92105] is brilliant.
.........Welcome to Bob's Diner,
ain't no place finer!
The food is good,
we're always in tha 'hood,
and [@53406] is a whiner!
2008-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who is this Amber Maine girl,I think she's crazy.
2008-02-02 [Keir Devlin]: ... Dx People have actually been with him? XD LAWL
2008-02-02 [Eloura]: Yeps and he' got lotsa children *nods*
2008-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the window*... Did I hear something about cake?!
2008-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*accuses Misty of being "Amber Maine"*...
2008-02-02 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yeh Len ;) XD JK
... I agree. I am sceptical about her.. NOT being "Amber Maine". It seems logical. After all, many people cover up the fact that they are using another name by instantly commenting later. I.e, they are the next to comment, something ABOUT the person like.. "Who is this.." blah. :D
2008-02-02 [nokaredes]: She commented almost 4 hours later... it's not her fault you lazy bums don't comment enough... it was probably just the thing she was most curious about.
2008-02-02 [Duke Devlin]: Meh. I've been offline,. SLEEPING. And doing more important things.
2008-02-02 [nokaredes]: Nothing is more important than commenting on Bob's Diner. How dare you even say such a thing!
2008-02-02 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes! You must be right, surely! XD
2008-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the window again*... what was that about pie?! ...wait... Did I ever even leave? ...oh well... *eats ramen*... *doesn't obey the laws of physics*...
2008-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*That made me happy.
2008-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... *shrugs*... *stabs misty*... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes,removes whatever you used to stab me,and smiles as the wound heals*
2008-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at sign on wall, "No healin'"*
2008-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sorry,I didn't see it.*points at the lamp infront of the sign*
2008-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ... *eats ramen*...


2008-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats sushi*
2008-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*
2008-02-03 [nokaredes]: Misty's getting a lot better at this "textual sparring" thing...
2008-02-03 [Eloura]: *eats BBQ chicken*
2008-02-03 [Xeroh Kanoe]: 
This is the result of about five minutes with a paint program. Not only do I say go ahead and improve it if you want, I insist you try to improve upon it. Anywhoo...*eats ramen*
2008-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: The Giants better win... though I would have prefered Green Bay... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...sweet. They won.
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: ... Which won?
2008-02-04 [Eloura]: *hits head off wall repeatedly and then mrrrs looks up and say's* hmm? I think it was the Giants...
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... I just wanted to know, a friend of mine wasn't very clear. -___- Plus.. I don't follow your crazy sporting events. :)
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: There is 85 watchers, I would LOVE to know who and where they all are. X___X
MESSAGE ME :D XD
2008-02-04 [nokaredes]: Some of them are people not on ET anymore... or clone houses...
2008-02-04 [~★~ gone~★~]: Are you talking about the super bowl?
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: .... Well they suck. =(
... I don't know. XD I am English.. and an IGNORANT English person at that.. SO maybe. :)
2008-02-04 [Eloura]: Yea... They need to come back to et and talk to US!!! (and yes super bowl) And your not an Ignorant English person. SOOOO yea.. Lol
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: WOO :D Thankies ;)
2008-02-04 [Eloura]: Cha welcome!!! *odd look on face* That confuses me not knowing your on lol ^^'
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: XD Yeh same, but as I said before.. :)
2008-02-04 [Eloura]: I know.. Lol sorry about that though ^^' *yawns and sighs* I HATE mondays...
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: Meh. XD
Me too. :)
Mah Birthday tomorrow. :D
2008-02-04 [Eloura]: *chi's* HAPPY EARLY B-DAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :::^.^:::
2008-02-04 [Duke Devlin]: XD Thankyou ;)
2008-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Birthday?! ...*the Bob's Diner employees burst into the room with sparklers*... "Happy, happy birthda-" *due to poor planning and a late night of drug usage, the cheap sparklers ignite the cheap wood causing a fire to rage cheaply out of control*... *millions die*... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-05 [Eloura]: Your welcome. *laughs at those who die for living in bob's diner*
2008-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*. .- - ... / .-. .- -- . -.*...
2008-02-05 [Keir Devlin]: ILOVESTEPHMOST! XD


-random-
2008-02-05 [Duke Devlin]: .... .... WOO :D At least you tried 'Bob's Diner employees'. :) <3
ILOVELENMOST! XD
*copies*
2008-02-05 [Eloura]: *hides in a sock and dies*
2008-02-05 [Duke Devlin]: XD Warum?
2008-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-05 [Duke Devlin]: ...*eats pizza and cake*...
2008-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hey! ...where'd you buy those foods from?!
2008-02-05 [Duke Devlin]: .... Domino's.. And my Daddy brought the cake home.. *points at my dad* Ask him. :D
2008-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...we have a strict policy about outside foods! ...however, I don't quite recall what that policy is... so carry on.
2008-02-06 [Eloura]: *appears and say's* RAR!!!
2008-02-06 [Duke Devlin]: Woo thankyou. :) *ate no more cake and pizza..* .... *finished the pizza* XD Cake got too sweet. ><
2008-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-06 [Duke Devlin]: ...*ate lasagne*...
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*ate your mom!*...
2008-02-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpwns misty*
2008-02-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: harpwns misty???WHAT THE...?
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *terrorists burst in and kidnap misty*... *realizing that she isn't good for any ransom and is a burden, they promptly return her*
2008-02-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: ... Woah you ate my Mum. 00
Oooo... Terrorists! What kind of terrorists are you? Terrifying.. Terrorists? :D
2008-02-07 [Eloura]: *eye widen up the shock that bob's diner continues even after it's last blow up and then wonders where the terrorists burst into, so ponders this*
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...*points at sign on the wall saying, "No Achmed The Dead Terrorist references!"*... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: Haha I love Achmed, he's the best though. =O Sorreh. :D *covers the sign with a coat* .. Wait.. What sign?!
2008-02-07 [sunabozu]: *sits down with a big cookie jar and eats cookies*
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...my cookie jar! ...NOOOO!! ...that's where I keep all my cookie-shaped explosives! ...*eats ramen... on a stick!*...
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: WOAH! *east pocky* XP
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Pocky?! ...now that is especially banned here... as well as all other Japanese oriented foods...... er... except ramen, of course.
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: ... *pokes your ramen out of the non-existent windows* ... No Ramen if pocky isn't allowed.. *shrugs* Actually.., I don't even really like pocky all that much.. JK :D
2008-02-07 [sunabozu]: *cookie explodes in sunabozu's stomach*Thats a spicy meata ball
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: .... I smell a reference! .. Or do I?! *her reference senses are tingling* ... *doesn't care and eats a spicy meata ball*
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *doesn't have any ramen*... *switches to some other addiction*... *snorts cocaine*... mmm... Brazilian...
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: ... *is jealous* ... ;.;
2008-02-07 [sunabozu]: balls of meat
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *orders a new shipment from Columbia*
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: ... .... *intercepts the shipment* :D
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOOO!!
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *snorts powedered sugar*
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals some spicy meata balls.............. and snorts them*
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: .... *hands you the shipment* .. I'm more into weed and speed... Rhyming mundane days away. XD
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*smokes dope with the pope*... didn't you ever wonder about all those odd colored smokes coming from the vatican...?
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: ... Never, never did. oO XD
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*leaps out the non-existent windows, shattering non-existent glass everywhere*... Sh*t. I cut myself! ...*bleeds non-existent blood*... *eats some ramen out in the street*...
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: .... *puts Bob's Diner on top of you, puttng you back inside* XP
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *climbs onto the roof*... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh wait... we can't afford a roof! ...*falls*...
2008-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: .... *watches* ... Oh.. *small shrug*
2008-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen with shrimp,and vegetables in it*
2008-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *stabs misty with an ice pick*
2008-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh dear.*dies from blood loss*
2008-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Another job well done. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *comes back to haunt Mort*
2008-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *stabs misty's ghost with another ice pick*
2008-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs as it goes through me*
2008-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *stabs you with a ghost ice pick*
2008-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: DAMN!*dies again*
2008-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...another job well done. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *comes back to life in Mcdonalds*
2008-02-08 [Duke Devlin]: .... ..... ...... Darn McDonalds.. >> Evil place. XD With wifi. =( Why can't BK or KFC have wifi!? Spazzy FF restaurants. >>
2008-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks back into bob's diner*
2008-02-09 [Lethan]: walking into BD's by choice? never thought i'd see that. *pulls on the chain attached to his arm and the table* argh, damn thing.
2008-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs a blowtorch*Need help?
2008-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: What have I told you about messing with your chains?! ...*smacks Lethandros*... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-09 [nokaredes]: What about Misty?! She's the one with a blowtorch! :O
2008-02-09 [Kim_Lundin]: *drops in from the ceiling* ... Oh my, I knew I should have taken to the left back there.
2008-02-09 [Pillowthief]: Fucking ninjas! Knew I should have killed thoses brats when I had the chance all those years ago.
2008-02-09 [Kim_Lundin]: Let me guess, you're on the pirates' side in that argument.
2008-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm on whatever side Chuck Norris is on... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-09 [Kim_Lundin]: That's the way of those who want to live a little longer.
2008-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Indeed. *sips tea*
2008-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly, a butler bursts in!*... It's you! So... we meet again... Space Butler! *he draws his sword*... *he runs out of ink and can't finish drawing his sword*... *I harpoon him*...
2008-02-10 [Lethan]: damn, this means we dont get space tea now, well done.
2008-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: didn't do it*hides blowtorch*
2008-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *places an order for space tea*... it'll be here in 9 to 10 million light years...
2008-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-02-10 [Lethan]: only 9 to 10?
2008-02-10 [Lethan]: only?
2008-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmmm.....?
2008-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah... 9 to 10... give or take several trillion... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-02-10 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh sounds good to me. *sips regular tea til it arrives*(
2008-02-10 [Pillowthief]: Yes, thank god we have Chuck Norris. Too bad we used to have Space Butler. Fucking ninjas.


Soon we will have to use our secret weapon...
Gwar



2008-02-10 [Duke Devlin]: ... Wow!
2008-02-10 [Pillowthief]: Gwwwarrrrrrrrr.
2008-02-10 [Pillowthief]: Holy crap.


Why does Bob's look so clean? Where'd all the trash and spam-like material go?!?
2008-02-10 [Duke Devlin]: =O No one knows.
2008-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... the pirate secret weapon looks strangely cheap...
2008-02-11 [sunabozu]: i ate a cat today
2008-02-11 [Duke Devlin]: :D
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: ... O.o
2008-02-11 [Duke Devlin]: XD WTF Why did I type tht.. I BLAME LEN FOR DISTRACTING ME :D
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: ;.;
Fine then! I'll hang up with you then! DX


-lies-
2008-02-11 [Duke Devlin]: HAHA But you didn't. :D <3
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: Now I did...
-sniffles-
DX AAAAAAAAAGH!
-suicide-
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heh... [sunabozu] ate pussy... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: You're an idiot.
A crude idiot.
-sneer-


:D SEE WHAT I MEAN STEPH?! XD


SEE?!
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah?! ...don't you see?!! ...*eats ramen*...... I wonder what giraffe tastes like...
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, I bet it would taste kind of beefy...
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: ...
...
...




Actually it's a very fine meat.
Like duck.


:D
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... duck... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-11 [Duke Devlin]: ... Duck is tastey. :) As is.. Gator or Croc, I forget which is legal. XD
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I would think croc... I've had gator before... it was kind of chewey...
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: I've had Gator and croc jerky! :D
Both were yummy.
So is kangaroo.
And the possum!
-lived in the south so... xD-
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: What about snake? ...you can't live in the south and not eat snake!
2008-02-11 [Keir Devlin]: I refussed to eat that. DX


It looked like ickyness.
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Big Boss had to eat snake... that was all he had to eat in the jungle... that and a few Russian rations... and some frogs... and birds... and fish... and mysterious fruits... and a glowing mushroom... *plays Metal Gear Solid*...
2008-02-11 [Duke Devlin]: .. Surprising.. XD
I quite liked.. Whatever I ate. XD My friend Sarah eats Ostrich. oO
2008-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: If you're from the south, I assume you've also had venison? ...being a Mexican living in Alabama, I sure eat a lot of freaky crap... goats, opossums, various dogs......
2008-02-11 [Duke Devlin]: Venison is nice. <3
XD
2008-02-11 [Pillowthief]: Deer killer!


And our secret weapon is not cheap, it futuristic. So is sodomy.
2008-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah?! ...well... ninjas have... uh... AIDS......
2008-02-12 [Duke Devlin]: .. Everyone has aids. *nods*(
2008-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Your mom has AIDS... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-12 [Duke Devlin]: ..Nah.. She doesn't have AIDS... You have aids. :D
2008-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I know! She gave it to me!
2008-02-12 [Duke Devlin]: WOAH :D Surprising that. -___-
2008-02-12 [Pillowthief]: Guess who gave them to her?
Me <--
2008-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Chuck Norris gives people AIDS... He doesn't have it, but he gives it to people anyway.
2008-02-13 [Duke Devlin]: WOAH! That's cause he's just that good.
And YEP. Clearly you ZIPPED over here and gave her them. XD
2008-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Why are there so few comments all of a sudden?! ...*gets gun*...
2008-02-14 [Pillowthief]: *grabs harpoon*
2008-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *has a gun that shoots harpoons*
2008-02-14 [Pillowthief]: Is that mounted? Careful, my friend, there are some whales that can drag your whole boat down with them.


*Looks around* Where'd that one go anyways? *Hefts harpoon, ready to throw*
2008-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: You mean misty, I assume...? ...who knows... probably out eating a few tons of plankton...
2008-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *a whale comes flying though the wall and eats [nokaredes]*
2008-02-14 [Lethan]: dammit, i thought you whale-proofed this place! I sure hope 'flying whale attack' doesnt count as an act of god. *mutter* bloody insurance companies, not covering meterorite storms...
2008-02-14 [Pillowthief]: Or Sunbacca attacks.
 Delete Sunrose now! 

2008-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner is covered in the event of Sunbacca attacks... and pirate raids... and ninja assaults... and puppy onslaughts... we're not covered in the event of storms, water damage, or fire...
2008-02-14 [Pillowthief]: Thats because you've already put too many claims in about fire damage and the whole "whale incident".... Needless to say, they wont cover you for water damage anymore either.
2008-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: And they know that Chuck Norris lurks around here, so there won't be any ninja assaults...
2008-02-15 [nokaredes]: Hey! How did I get eaten by a whale?! I wasn't online for days! :O
2008-02-15 [Eloura]: Does the insurance cover kitty attacks???
2008-02-15 [Pillowthief]: Depends on the size of the kitty.


Under a foot, yes. Tiger sized kitties, however, are unfortunately not covered.
2008-02-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-02-17 [sara(:]: Bob's Diner sucks. :D
2008-02-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2008-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Duh, Sara... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-02-17 [Eloura]: *laughs as thousands of little kittens attack bob's diner destroying it* At least the are all tiny!!
2008-02-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-02-17 [Lethan]: *grabs one and eats it* hey, not bad. needs salt.
2008-02-17 [Pillowthief]: We dont offer salt. We have tabasco though, you up for some hot pussy?
2008-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes flying through the window*... did someone say hot pussy?!
2008-02-17 [nokaredes]: ...did you leave? I didn't notice.
2008-02-18 [sara(:]: Well, as long as you know.
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: *watche from away as bob's diner now catchs on fire*
2008-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes flying in through the window again*... no... I never did leave... *is one of hundreds of different Morts in here*...
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: *laughs as this mort catches on fire*
2008-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *was already on fire, because all the cool kids were doing it*
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: *watches as it suddenly floods*
2008-02-18 [Pillowthief]: Crap! We're not covered for fire or water!


*Calmly bartends* Well, atleast we have enough FireWater.
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: *rturns and say's* I'll take a firewater Please. *watches metorites fall from the sky crashing into bob's diner*
2008-02-18 [Pillowthief]: Youre going to have to take a shot. Unfortunately we're out of ice.
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: *thinks* Ehh always out of ice *goes into the backroom and brings out more ice* Here, and make it a triple.
2008-02-18 [Duke Devlin]: ... Man I missed this place.. *wanders in and sits on.. a toadstool*
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: And we missed you! *sits on a bar top*
2008-02-18 [Duke Devlin]: Yay ^^
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: ^.^ *mrrs and say's* I have been awake for over 18 hours lol!!! running on 4 hours after having another 18 hours of being awake Lol!!!
2008-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn Native Americans... we just had to build Bob's Diner on top of their gravesite... and now we're cursed. Luckily, we're covered for Native American curses... and since most of these unfortunate events are because of the curse, that means we're covered! ...only problem is... we have to prove that it's because of the curse... which is impossible... which means we're screwed... *eats ramen*... *drinks Firewater*...
2008-02-18 [Eloura]: *drinks her firewater and say's* so true so true
2008-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2008-02-19 [Eloura]: Nice
2008-02-19 [Pillowthief]: Im drunk. Feels like a Tues.




Wait. It is Tuesday.


Blarg.
2008-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *watches Walker Texas Ranger clips on Conan O'Brien*
2008-02-20 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Rrrriiiigghhhhttttt at least you guys remain unchangingly weird...
2008-02-20 [Lethan]: and weirdly unchanging.
2008-02-20 [Eloura]: Which really means we are always the same *nods clearing it up for those not understanding*
2008-02-20 [nokaredes]: Also, weird.
2008-02-20 [Eloura]: True *still waiting for firewater*
2008-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELLO!
2008-02-21 [Eloura]: HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude... most anime sucks... *14 foot bear bursts in and tackles Misty*...
2008-02-21 [Eloura]: Anime rocks *sticks toune out instantly winning the fight, while still waiting for her firewater*
2008-02-21 [Lethan]: no firewater left. I think theres some FLAMEJUICE (tm) in the back.
2008-02-21 [Eloura]: *pouts* but but but...
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: Most anime DOES suck actually.. But there are MANY good ones. :)
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *drinks PyroLiquid*... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: ... *Steals PyroLiquid*
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck is pyroliquid? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: No one knows! *whispered*
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *turns up his hearing aids*
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: *SHOUTS* No one knows! *grin*
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what? ...*turns them up even further*...
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: Oh sorry! *pulls them out of your ears* Better?
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait a second... those were my ear muffs!
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: Bwaha >=D *has stolen teh ear muffs*
2008-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out an 9mm*... *fires randomly into the crowd of people standing nearby*...
2008-02-21 [Duke Devlin]: ... There's a crowd in here?! Not anymore... >=D *cheers*
2008-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *has hid under table*
2008-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses a grenade under the table*
2008-02-22 [Duke Devlin]: *sat on another table, swinging mah legs*
2008-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *runs away before it explodes*
2008-02-22 [Pillowthief]: Get in car! Who driving car? Oh No! Bear driving car! How can that be?
2008-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmm...
2008-02-22 [Pillowthief]: Big American party! Everyone having fun! Oh No! Police!
2008-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: hey pillowthief
2008-02-22 [Lethan]: wait...bears are allowed to drive now?
2008-02-22 [Pillowthief]: Oh No!!!
2008-02-22 [Pillowthief]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-ReoBPl4mM
2008-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn Koreans... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-22 [Pillowthief]: Snooch to the Noooch!
2008-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpbzrdqqoFY
2008-02-23 [Pillowthief]: A ninja cut those scenes. No pirate would ever make Chuck Norris look so bad, for fear of a Round-House kick to the face.


Except for that one scene of the kid falling flat on his face. We picked that one.
2008-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... it does say "edited by ninjas" up in the corner... *eats ramen*...
2008-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *tastes the ground*... yup... just as I thought. A plane crashed here.
2008-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmm.....
2008-02-23 [Lethan]: well yes, the wreckage over there kinda is the main clue.


and the screaming. cant forget the screaming.
2008-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ahhhhh the screaming,music to my ears.
2008-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *glances at the wreckage*... uh... yeah... that's obviously just an optical illusion... duh.
2008-02-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-02-23 [Pillowthief]: WTF? Was the soil tainted? He actually went "patuwey" several times. Definately edited by ninjas.
2008-02-23 [Duke Devlin]: Darn.
2008-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,Darn
2008-02-24 [Eloura]: *appears*
2008-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi Eloura!*waves*
2008-02-24 [Eloura]: HI MISTY!!!!
2008-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: How are you?
2008-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Why is conversation so slow these days...? ...and whatever happened to that Nokaredes guy...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-24 [nokaredes]: Your mom happened to me last night, that's what!
2008-02-24 [Lethan]: such brilliant timing. *applauds*
2008-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...but she commented five hours later! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-02-24 [Pillowthief]: And the timing... was impeccable.
2008-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *another Mort comes flying through the window*... *harpoons it*... stupid cloning machine...
2008-02-24 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-02-24 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear.. I miss the witty conversation in this place. :/ It's gone really.. LAME with all the 'HELLO's and waving. -___-
2008-02-24 [Eloura]: *giggles* Agreed, but it's still bb's diner.
2008-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...BB's Diner?! ...******* BB... stole my mutha' ******* diner... *gets shotgun off the wall*... uh... I'll be right back... I'm going to... uh... shoot at rocks.
2008-02-24 [Eloura]: *laughs waiting to hear the shots*
2008-02-24 [Duke Devlin]: Hey Eloura changed her name! *points and laughs*
Le meh.
BB needs to be shot. Let me do the honours.
2008-02-24 [Eloura]: Ehh I will change it back in atleast a week ok ^^' *smiles* It's me.


I WANNA SHOOT IT! *pulls out 12 gauge*
2008-02-24 [Pillowthief]: Shes French! Fire! *Harpoons Non-Devlin*
2008-02-24 [Duke Devlin]: Oh noes! D: *ish harp'wned* *throws rocks at Pillowthief*
2008-02-25 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-02-26 [november800]: this restaurant aint for me.....i dont eat meat..
and i aint payin the service charge to Bibs stewsard either..
im gone..
2008-02-26 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, like Bob's serves meat anyways. Fucking vegitarian ninjas.
2008-02-26 [nokaredes]: I replied the next comment after yours, and that's what matters...
2008-02-26 [sunabozu]: have you ever heard billy talent? the singer kinda sounds like inuyasha
2008-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Vegetarians claim they love nature, but they keep eating it up!
2008-02-27 [Pillowthief]: Ive always wondered if they felt guilty when they eat animal crackers...
2008-02-27 [Pillowthief]: *rocks still on their way to hit PT*
2008-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Those are some slow rocks... *opens up Bob's Opium Den*... Bring the family!
2008-02-27 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles Pen-
2008-02-27 [Pillowthief]: Hey! Thats not nice to call them slow. They're "special", OK?
2008-02-27 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm.. Bob's Opium Den.. Sounds fun! >=D
2008-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...those sure are some retar- I mean, special rocks... *eats ramen*... *removes the chimney on Bob's Opium Den, so the birds/bugs/angels/various bacteria/Midi-chlorians/humanoid jets/transformers/saiyans above can't get high for free off my expensive smoke*...
2008-02-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-02-28 [Lethan]: *climbs off the roof* dammit, i was on to something there.
2008-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: .../lethandroses...
2008-02-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-02-29 [Duke Devlin]: Mmm expensive smoke..
2008-02-29 [sunabozu]: OH...MY...GOD... THAT IS A GIANT FUCKING BEAR!!!
2008-02-29 [Duke Devlin]: OFMG NO!!! *Throws bacon-bit-babies at it*
2008-02-29 [Pillowthief]: *Removes bear costume* Mmm. Bacon-bit-babies. My favorite.
2008-02-29 [Pillowthief]: "OFMG"?
*Throws ICQ Speak Dictionary at Non-Devlin's head*
2008-02-29 [sunabozu]: hey have you heard billy talent?
2008-02-29 [Mortified Penguin]: If you count eubonics, ICQ, and Pig Latin then I'm like... septilingual... *eats ramen*... and who the hack is Billy Talent?
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*bursts in (again) playing a mean guitar solo*... *bashes it over misty's head*...
2008-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: BAKA!
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty, tu es estúpido. Los únicos japanes que tu conoce son tres palabras tu aprendas de joto anime. Vaya aprenden una lengua verdadera, cabrona... *como ramen*...
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shrugs*... *hits misty over the head with another guitar... and a banjo!*...
2008-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: yomohono
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *a gang of mercenaries burst in and stuff Misty into a sack, tie the sack up, slam the sack into some glass/barbed wire, and then toss the sack into the ocean*
2008-03-01 [Pillowthief]: How'd you think I learned Japanese?
Cowboy Bebop and Naruto, suckas.


And I dont think "yomohomo" is an actual word.
2008-03-01 [Lethan]: it probably is now. *fishes misty out, and writes 'cheap fish product' on the side, and sells it to a sushi bar*
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Whatever happened to Cowboy Bebop...? it never comes on anymore... *eats some suhshi*... *harks it back up*... man! This stufff tastes like crap!
2008-03-01 [Lethan]: what do you expect? i couldnt find any sacks in the GOOD fishing grounds, so i had to cut corners!
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Cut corners?! ...but the corners are the most delicious part! ...*smacks you*... go find me some whale!
2008-03-01 [Lethan]: whale corners, or just whale? *prepares a harpoon*
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Whale corners, I suppose... the rest of the whale just tastes like blubber. I think I saw some whale sacks in the pond out back... *eats ramen*...
2008-03-01 [Lethan]: ah, good.
well, i got this hrpoon ready, may as well use it. *harpoons nearby old peoples home* *fetches sacks*
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoon related deaths steadily increase in the neighborhood*
2008-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats whale*...
2008-03-02 [Pillowthief]: Cowboy Bebop was meant to only be one season. Now you can get them on DVD, there's 26 episodes on 6 discs altogether.


*readys harpooon, but cant find any whales*
2008-03-02 [Duke Devlin]: D: Man I hate Cowboy Bebop.. Which is kinda mean since I have never seen it. XD
2008-03-02 [Pillowthief]: Shun the non believer.


Shunnn.
  ShuuuuuuunnnnNA.
Shuuuuuuunnnnnn.
2008-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I have this sudden urge to go to candy mountain...
2008-03-02 [Pillowthief]: Oh god!






They took my friggin kidney.
2008-03-02 [Lethan]: damn, they beat me to it. you've still got one left, right?
*readies surgical knife*
2008-03-02 [Pillowthief]: No, alcohol already ruined it. Hospital took it out a couple years back.


You want my liver?
2008-03-02 [Lethan]: DO I!
2008-03-02 [Duke Devlin]: Woahs!
2008-03-03 Livzy: **pokes LeLe**
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *flys over a bunch of rocks in a hot air balloon* damn, i'm losing altitude! ill have to drop these babies. *drops babies onto the rocks* *gains altitude*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: goddamnit livy, must you poke me everywhere?
i mean that in both ways.
2008-03-03 Livzy: lol yesh i must, it's my lifes mission :P *pokes again*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: instead of poke...how about pork? *porks you* *hams and bacons you also*
2008-03-03 Livzy: *throws eggs and toast at you* how bout we just have breaky? >.>
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: More babies to eat! GREAT! :D *thieves those babies and fries 'em up good and proper*
2008-03-03 Livzy: hehe Duke you sound like a metal head ^_^ *high fives*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *orders breakfast...to conquer russia!*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *then the outlying regions*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *now rules asia*
2008-03-03 Livzy: *steals asia* MINE! >.> *runs away with it*
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: *high fives back* ... *then slices off those fingers to serve up with those babies* :D
2008-03-03 Livzy: omg v_v *tackles and steals them back magicly putting them back on perfectly*.. *eats your babies*
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: Hey! Those were mine. >> Well, I was gon' eat 'em anywho. >>
2008-03-03 Livzy: they were good :D *pats her tum*
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: Pah.. I'll just eat you later. *glares and throws rocks at you*
2008-03-03 Livzy: that sounded kinky :P *dodges the rocks and hides*
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: Haha. It wouldn't if you knew me. ;)
What am I talking about?! It'd sound worse!
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: *throws more rocks*
2008-03-03 Livzy: lmao :P *catches them and tosses them back!*
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: PAH! D: XD *launches them, plus boulders and little barbie dolls at you* ... *loudly*
2008-03-03 Livzy: *bites the heads off the barbie dolls* *growls*
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn you, Lethandros! ...I was going to take Russia and Asia ...*orders lunch to commence a sneak attack in Kamchatka*... *uses brunch to build up my forces in Iceland*...
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *is suddenly pelted with Barbie Dolls seemingly coming out of nowhere*... retreat! *Brunch runs for it*...
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *fends off guerrila lunch attacks*
*fortifies fried egg wall*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *prepares cereal catapults*
they're GREEEAAAAAAAT!
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you, Tony! *the hotdog army stabs at the egg wall with french fries*
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Colonel Chicken Finger leads his group of chicken nuggets over the south side of the wall by climbing it with ramen noodle ropes*
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: *pizza army starts to take over everywhere, while hamburgers lead the fight*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *captin birdseye comes with waffle reinforcements*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: haha, now this is what i call a food fight!
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: *Pippgy wiggle comes with chicken soup back up* Agreed!
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: *croutons engae in a final last stand*
*they all die. horribly*
heres a tip. if you can run...RUN
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *the battle begins*... *what appears to be ketchup is strewn across the ground*...
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: and mustard. which is kind of disturbing.
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: *Watches as a hamburger is squished under a hotdog*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: oh the humanity!...uh, i mean the various-animal-piecesity!
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *calls in an air raid*... *fondue pots explode over the ground, spilling toxic waste all over the battlefield*...
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: *Hamburgers and pizza disinigrate*
2008-03-03 [Pillowthief]: *Steadies, then aims carefully. Successfully harpoons Lethandros, Mort, and Elora with one fell swoop. Unfortunately Chucky Cheese and the Hamburgler were taken out as well. We will miss them*
2008-03-03 [Pillowthief]: *Takes over Bob's Diner as the new owner, then realizes that all of the commenters are dead. Mourns the Hamburglers death*
2008-03-03 [Lethan]: im not quite dead yet...*dies*
2008-03-03 [Pillowthief]: *Thinks about mourning leth, but doesnt*
2008-03-03 Lethandros's Ghost: oh, yeah...thanks. not. *haunts the bargain bin in the nearby supermarket*
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: *had just returned to see her clone dead* Not another one.. >.> *throws dead clone in bin* WHAHAHAH
2008-03-03 [sunabozu]: hamburgers
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: CHICKEN NUGGETS! *laughs manically and eats ramen*
2008-03-03 [~★~ gone~★~]: Ha! At school we have no WATER! and that means really bad school food!!!
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: What? NO water??? Why?? What happened, are they sending you guys home early???
2008-03-03 [~★~ gone~★~]: We've been here all day and we didn't have water... we don't think we're going home early...
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: Wow... that's stupid
2008-03-03 [~★~ gone~★~]: I know and I have to go PISS
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: Awwwwwwwwww I sorry
2008-03-03 [~★~ gone~★~]: Yeah!!!
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: *tickles*
2008-03-03 [~★~ gone~★~]: NOT KOOL *runs*
2008-03-03 [Eloura]: IS TOO! *chases*
2008-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what's this? ...another harpoon in me?! ...dang it... that's like... the third time this week... and it's only monday!
2008-03-03 [Duke Devlin]: WOAHS! Not more hrpwns! D:
2008-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpwns Devlin*
2008-03-04 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear.. *is harpwn'd* .... *doesn't harpwn Mort* :O Oh no! :D
2008-03-04 [Pillowthief]: Non-Devlin: Please refer to section 8:2:01 appendage (b) of the Harpoon Man-ual.


Section 8
Chapter 2
Paragraph 01
Appendage (b)
Person or persons, having been harp'wnd, may not immediately harp'wn their harp'wnist(s). Furthermore they may not immediately harp'wn another non-harp'wnist who may or may not have been included in the harp'wning conversation. Afore said harp'wned person or persons must take the humiliation and embarassment of an at least two comment space between the last harp'wning and the return harp'wn.
2008-03-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh I do apologise ;) *amends comment* Better :P
2008-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *harp'wns the Man-ual*
2008-03-04 [Pillowthief]: *Harpoon Man, who had earlier hit on several women at once, busts in the door of Bob's Diner, strikes a pose, then harp'wns Mort. He doesnt say anything, but you get the distict feeling he was angry about Mort's harpoon, which had cleanly sliced through his picture on the cover of the Harpoon Man-ual*
2008-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Harpoons! My only weakness! ...how did you know?! ...*collapses*...
2008-03-05 [Lethan]: its written on your forehead in glowing neon letters...*eats mort's unfinsihed ramen*
2008-03-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Incase you guys want to know Yomohono is Korean,it means fuck you.
2008-03-05 [Lethan]: well hello to you too. *rolls eyes*
2008-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: So you watch Korean anime too, huh...? ...loser... *bleeds on the ground*...
2008-03-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was telling the other,I like you.I think you are cool.
2008-03-05 [Duke Devlin]: Why did we need to know the korean for fuck you, Misty? -___- Freak.
2008-03-05 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, I thought we were talking about Japanime...


Id you're going to do that than you're an mi ouche.
BTW, that's Thai for... I wont even go there. Its too terrible to explain in english.
2008-03-05 [Duke Devlin]: Meh.. *shrug*
Oh gotta love this wiki.
2008-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: This isn't a wiki. This is only a fake realm in which we all live in. In truth, it is merely an optical illusion, created by the machines that actually rule the world. If you would like to know more on the subject, take the red pill...
2008-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *finds the cure for cancer*... it was behind the couch the whole time!
2008-03-05 [Lethan]: so the cure for cancer is a small stuffed poodle on a stick?
2008-03-06 [Duke Devlin]: Nah! Look next to that! It's the smaller, greener thing. :)
And now you mentionit, you are right! I must have gone mad! XD
2008-03-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -glomps pen- hey all!
2008-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats poodle on a stick dipped in green stuff*... mmm... you can really taste the green.
2008-03-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2008-03-06 [Pillowthief]: *Mort is now Cancer Free! Too bad that was the only cure we had...*


*Begins chemotherapy. Shakes fist at Mort*
2008-03-06 [Duke Devlin]: Darn him, huh? ;)
2008-03-06 [Lethan]: *rummages down the couch* hey, i found ano-...no wait, this is just a rabies infested raccon....GETITOFFGETITOFFGETITOFF *flails around wildly*
2008-03-06 [Duke Devlin]: *shoots the 'coon* ... *with a spud gun* D: How very grim!
2008-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: And to think... I never even had cancer to begin with! ...*prepares for pillowthief's funeral*...
2008-03-06 [Duke Devlin]: Oh darn.. You cure waster. XD *is already in funeral attire*
2008-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets tired of waiting*... *gets a shotgun off the wall and goes down to the chemo center*...
2008-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats Chem-O brand cereal*
2008-03-07 [Lethan]: ooh, is there a special toy in the pack?
2008-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks*... nope... just a coupon for some free rhinoplasty... too bad we only have a hippo.
2008-03-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-03-07 [Pillowthief]: *munches* Hey! Wait a minute... This isnt Chem-O! Its Chemic-Os!


...Im allergic to toxic fluids and Cherri-O shaped sludge rings!


*Dies*
2008-03-07 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo! Finally I can use this damn funeral attire! D: *sits and pretends to be mournful* ... *while stealing silverwear from the wedding a few churches over*
2008-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *speaks to the "audience"*... Pillowthief was always a kind man... which is probably why, just before he died, he signed this will stating that everything would go to me. *holds up a crudely forged will*
2008-03-07 [Keir Devlin]: ...
-joins Steph in the theift- >3
I'm not even gonna pretend that I give a damn. <3
2008-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...how many times are we gonna bury Pillowthief?! ...this is like... the fith time in the last few months! ...*hurls his body into traffic*... *hilarity ensues*...
2008-03-08 [Pillowthief]: *Is Redead* Stop right there you villian! You will not take my- Oh crap! Its Bruce Campell! Run away! Run away!
*Bruce Campell jumps out of nowhere and starts firing a sawed off shotgun, waiving a chainsaw (that's apparently attached to his arm) and shouting smart aleck comments*


"Whoa, you're ugly. Here, let me rearrange your face for you"
*Blam!*
"Shop smart, shop S-Mart"
*Blam!*
2008-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Bruce Campell! *dives into a stack of rusty nails*
2008-03-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2008-03-08 [Pillowthief]: *Blam!*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *runs*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *appears and is ran over*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *stops*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *squeeks*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: You ok?
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: Yea!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok,good.*hugs*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *hugs back and say's* Yeps!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY!
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: So hows you!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm hyper.
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *mrrrs all happily*
2008-03-09 [nokaredes]: Misty-and-Eloura conversations involve very short sentences.
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you a five foot chocolate bunny as I munch on my own*
2008-03-09 [nokaredes]: o_o *runs away*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *eyes widen at chocolate*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY!
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: CHI-NESSES!!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAYNESS!
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *bounces hyperly*
2008-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Note to self. Don't leave them alone. *stabs Misty*... *loses -5 experience points!*... darn it!
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *laughs and tackle the mort and huggles the mort*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *does the same*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *laughs and ish now feeling misty's presence and laughs* Mort is trapped by two girls!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yep
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *giggles and laughs*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grins widely*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *giggles harder and pokes the mort*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pokes the mort*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *watches waiting for mort to react*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort?
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *tilts head waiting for a reaction*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*I think he logged out.
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: Darn.. *pouts and stands up*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah.*sighs*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *sits on the floor and smiles*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *munches on some pocky*
2008-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Zombies!! ...*shoots Misty and Eloura with a shotgun off the wall*...
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*You shot my pocky!*cries*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: UHHH!!!!!!!!! Lucky!!
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *cries*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: Whats wrong?
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: My pocky fell on the nasty dirty floor
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww I sorry *hadn't notied any of the earlier conversation*
2008-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *kidnaps misty!*... *ties her up and places her in a dark room with nothing but a small TV, a bunch of empty ramen cups, some scattered pills, and two corpses*... *TV comes on*... "Misty... I want to play a game. Your whole life you've been eating the wretched candy known as pocky. You've paid no mind at all to the finer cuisine in life. I think it's time you became more sophisticated. In front of you, you will find a wide variety of foods and eating utensils. You will remain in this room until you starve, if you are unable to eat the right foods with the right utensils in the right order. To make things more interesting, I have slipped some toxins into the food and slathered the silverware with some other various toxins. If the correct utensil is combined with the correct food, then- Ah, screw it."... *shoots misty*...
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *squeeks and looks around now alone*
2008-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *chickens attack Eloura*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks up*Hey where did my twin go?
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *eats the chickens*
2008-03-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *is bored again*
2008-03-09 [Pillowthief]: *The Chickens from the Legend of Zelda take offense at the eating of their brothers! They attack [Elora]!*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *laughs as the person named elora gets attacked for a mispelling* Nice!!!
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: *munches on the Chickens from the Legend of Zelda*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: *Throws the bones of the Chickens from the Legend of Zelda at [Eloura]*
2008-03-09 [Eloura]: *chews on the bones* YUMMY!!!!!
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Gooood >:|
2008-03-09 [Keir Devlin]: XD DUDE, THAT WOULD BE AN AWSOME GAME, PENGUIN! XD




Love to play it on the lad.
D




I've never played that Zelda game. =]
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: It actually does. XD


The Zelda gamesss are great. <3
2008-03-09 [Keir Devlin]: D: I wouldn't want to play it though. ;.;
-tosses my brother at him- >D
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Not me either! :D
XD
Throw him SWIFTLY!
2008-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You can tell by the three corpses in that room that it isn't the first "game" I've played... *eats ramen*...
2008-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn various Devlins! *sets up Devlin traps*
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: *BOTH Devlin's avoid the traps.. With the ease, and grace, of an antelope* ... *coughs*
2008-03-09 [Pillowthief]: *Ah, good. If you can dodge a Devlin trap, you should be able to doodge...


A high-powered sniper rifle!  ...Wait. Various Devlins? ...Oh MY GOD, they're duplicating! This one is a Non-Devlin too! Kill it! Kill it!*
2008-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: >:D Wait.. I never asked.. Why are we Non-Devlins?
2008-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *hurls hot sauce at the multiplying Devlins*
2008-03-10 [Duke Devlin]: *deflects thy power*
2008-03-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *hot sauce hits Misty instead*
2008-03-10 [Pillowthief]: Because neither of you are Devlin, of course. Devlin is a guy, you two must obviously be his Stalkers. I have a file on both of you, you know. SHU
2008-03-10 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh sure. ;) Good answer though. XD
2008-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...Pillowthief has files on all of us?! No way I'm getting deported again! ...*jumps out the window*...
2008-03-10 [Duke Devlin]: D: Me neither! D:
2008-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *Misty gets deported!*
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: *Misty1, of course, gets deported back*


Remember? We've tried that already. They dont want her either.
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it. I suppose the Martians don't want her either?
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: They may, but our budget has unfortunately been depleted due to the fast food WWIII we just had. We dont even have enough money to drive her to Wisconsin, not to mention outerspace.
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: McDonald's started it...
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: I could fund! ? :D I can sell my bacon babies.
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: Except....I already ate them all.
*disposes of bear costume*
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Oh darn.. Guess I can't then! XD
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *finds a bear costume in the trash*... sweet!
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Woah! .... Ahh! *runs into a giant Llama* ... *in the corner of the Diner* ... *Not the corner that the mysterious guy inhabits*
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: Meh, I more of "occupy" this space, then inhabit, really...
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh did I say you!? No! You are the theif of Pillows! Not the mysterious inhabiter of dark corners!
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: Not even I know what a "theif" is! That's mysterious, isnt it? Kinda sounds French, now that I think of it.
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Shh! So I can't spell today. -___-
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: I would imagine that theifs like the dark and try to be inconspicuous, so....


*Slits the throat of the other guy that was hiding in the corner and takes the darkness for myself*
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh good plan!
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Not the inconspicuous guy in the corner! NOOO!!
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: *sniffle* The millionth funeral initiated by some event at Bob's Diner!
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...the millionth since you've been here, at least.
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Quite! Hmm... *gets new funeral attire*
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I like to go to funerals... If you wait around long enough, you can steal the tux off the dead guy... I mean... he's not going to need it.
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Hahah very true. XD But what if it is a closed coffin? Or it is a female? ;)
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...then go kill some rich guy and wait a day or two!
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ah makes sense. ;) Flawless.
2008-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Exactly... *kills some rich guy... and his brother*...
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Oooo *mooches on the brother*
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: Not to mention its a great place to pick up chicks.
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Yep.. The depressed, vulnerable ones? :P
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: In need of comforting, yes.
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh how very sly of you. ;)
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: I am a "theif" you know.
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh yes. 'theives' are very sly... As opposed to 'thieves' who are less sly, but specialise in the taking of objects without intent to return.
2008-03-11 [Pillowthief]: And they're mysterious! *Does the Jazz Hands*
2008-03-11 [Duke Devlin]: :O Oh yes!
2008-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: And punch. And kick. And jazz hands. Good, young pillowtheif. I believe you are ready...
2008-03-12 [Pillowthief]: *Chews on a newspaper-colored-breakfast-sandwich*


Mhmph, what was that?
2008-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... newspaper...
2008-03-12 [Keir Devlin]: ...
:D You have an article on Steph and I? >D I WANNA SEE!
2008-03-12 [Eloura]: *sits there bored to death*
2008-03-12 [Lethan]: *joins in the sitting bordom death fun*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: As do I. ;)
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: *little puppy scampers in*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: :O
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: *little puppy scampers around duke*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: :O *pokes the puppies*
2008-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *body slams the puppy* RRRRAAAAHH!! *flexes*
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: *little puppy barks at duke playfully*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: :O Nuuu~~~ Don't you bark at me! D: *watches*
2008-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of chickens burst in and surround the puppy!*
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: *jumps up on hind legs and starts playfully batting paws at duke*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: :O *pushes puppy over* :D Awwhh
2008-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Don't you ignore my assaults on the puppy!
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: XD Man... I know.. *kicks Mort, Suna and the puppy*
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: *yelps while flying through the air* I am the puppy!
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: D:
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: i gotta go*disappears in a puff of smoke*
2008-03-12 [sunabozu]: i gotta go*disappears in a puff of smoke leaving the puppy legs*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: ... :O
2008-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the legs*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: Mmm.. Chickeny.
2008-03-12 [Pillowthief]: *shrug*
2008-03-12 [Duke Devlin]: Le.
2008-03-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Send me to Canada
2008-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: They said no and threatened us with war... *eats ramen*...
2008-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: But I have a sister there.
2008-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: She said no too.
2008-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*Whatever.
2008-03-13 [nokaredes]: Canada is awesome.
2008-03-13 [Duke Devlin]: She did say no, I'm afraid. Never been
2008-03-13 [Pillowthief]: Ive been, and she says no...
2008-03-13 [Duke Devlin]: Quite right. >:D
2008-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Canada sucks! ...*bombs Canada*... take that! ...that'll teach you not to get involved in world affairs!
2008-03-14 [Lethan]: well, they might want to now. *bombs them more to make sure they dont*
2008-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh oh... extra bombing... that could make them mad. We'd better retaliate preemptively, just to be safe. *bombs them further*
2008-03-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*[Mortified Penguin],YOU SUCK!
2008-03-14 [Pillowthief]: Shhh. Hes a canadia-ian.
2008-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Vhat are jou talking about?
2008-03-14 [Pillowthief]: Ok, maybe he's a Swede.


Bomb him anyways, eh!
2008-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *is the bomb!*
2008-03-15 [Pillowthief]: Hmm... I was expecting maybe a bett-
*Mort explodes, throwing pieces of raw penguin all over Bob's Diner's walls!*
2008-03-15 [Eloura]: *walks in and says* Ooo did he FINALLY explodes himself?!
2008-03-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*
2008-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *chunk of Mort on the floor says, "I see Misty has a new eye rolling phase..."*
2008-03-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *looks at the chunk of Mort*Whatever.*rolls eyes*
2008-03-15 [Eloura]: *eyes widen* OooOOooO
2008-03-15 [Lethan]: *rolls eyes-or eye shaped dice* yes! two sixes. go fish.
2008-03-15 [Pillowthief]: I think youve gravely misjudged me.


I have Yatzi. All your fishies belong to me.
2008-03-15 [Lethan]: not so fast! *lays down five aces* checkmate.
2008-03-15 [Pillowthief]: Last time I checked the rules to Parcheesi, that there would be called cheat'n.
*quick draws a six shooter and fires at Nok*
2008-03-15 [Lethan]: i thought we were playing 'reverse melon thrust'


i shouldve known we werent, i remember us losing all the peices.
2008-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah? *rolls dice*... 21!
2008-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: See, son? That's how you win at poker! ...son?! ...where'd he g- oh yeah... that's right... the judge took him away...
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmmmm.....?
2008-03-16 [Eloura]: YUMMY!!
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2008-03-16 [Eloura]: hi hi!!!
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: what's up?
2008-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in! ...and tackle Nok!*
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: who is nok?
2008-03-16 [Eloura]: I guess the lions are up O.o
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: ummmmmmmmm...
2008-03-16 [Eloura]: *laughs* Nok is ermm Hm i forget *say suspiciously*
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol you mean nokaredes?
2008-03-16 [Eloura]: *giggles and huggles and Ed plushie*
2008-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-03-16 [Pillowthief]: Which other Nok would we be talking about besides... well, there really isnt anybody else.


*Harpoons Misty1!*
2008-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *orders a new shipment of harpoons*
2008-03-16 [Pillowthief]: You up early Mort. Wait. Nevermind, you just live on the east coast. What is it, noon over there? Egh, at least youre on the ball, I was running out with all this harpooning that Ive been doing...
2008-03-16 [Lethan]: balls? harpooning? COASTS? i smell a consiracy.
2008-03-16 [Pillowthief]: *Shipment of harpoons arrive*
Ah, just in time.


*Harpoons Leth with a bright shineny new harpoon*
2008-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons Misty with an old, rusty harpoon*
2008-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I must say... the new 10,000 BC movie isn't entirely historically accurate... apparently mammoths helped build the pyramids... and giant dinosaur-chickens attacked the Egyptians in the jungles... and apparently some cave men took down the pharaoh with spears...
2008-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gang of dinosaur-chickens burst in and eat Nok*
2008-03-17 [Lethan]: damn look at this harpoon in me, right where it shows. *covers it up with some wrapping paper*
2008-03-17 [Pillowthief]: Its really not so fun to make fun of Nok anymore since shes never around lately. *shrug*


*Harpoons Nok anyways*
2008-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Pssst... I think Nok is a ninja.
2008-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, we of the secret ideological organization of Bob's Diner must take it upon ourselves to take over this debased website known as Elftown. From the start, it has always been sordid, starting with it's first member, a Mr. [Hedda]. This website in its entirety must be set aright... and yet! Should suddenly Elftown become unified under our rule - I doubt not that the ignorant masses shall be laggard! Therefore, why not just take over a single guard? But then, to avoid overstretch - why not go one step beyond? Now, there is not trepidation! A prudent first stage to the conquest of Elftown! In other words, our goal is... One wiki.
2008-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Today's mission: conquer one old wiki from someone and gain ownership.
2008-03-18 [nokaredes]: *does ninja things*
2008-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I knew it! ...but enough with your shenanigans! *pulls a rope hanging from the ceiling that releases a trap door beneath Nok*... so far in today's conquest, I have managed to attain three people's permission to take over their wiki, however I need to subtly get them to hand over complete dominance, or else they won't even count... and I have still yet to receive an answer from several other people... so, we shall see tomorrow.
2008-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-03-19 [Pillowthief]: But... *glances at the still open trap door* *mumbles something about not knowing we had those* Dont we already have a wiki? Bobs was, if I recall correctly, taken from that sop Turkey.
2008-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... but we need more! ...and the next objective is to take over as many old houses as possible...
2008-03-19 [Pillowthief]: How would we do that one? If they're old they probably dont come here anymore... Are you suggesting that we hack the Man? *Starts watching the movie, Hackers*
2008-03-19 [Pillowthief]: HACK THE PLANET!!!
2008-03-19 [Lethan]: Hacking. with ice picks.


then we claim ownership by default. since the person we've been hacking at is probably dead now. if not, hack harder.
2008-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *hacks Lethandros... with a pick axe!*
2008-03-19 [sunabozu]: hello...
2008-03-19 [Pillowthief]: Is that that ninja bard, reterned? God, I hope not. I hated that guy.
2008-03-20 [Lethan]: in-deed and ow, careful with that. you could hurt someone.
2008-03-20 [Eloura]: *reappears and axes everyone* It means... I CARE!!!!
2008-03-20 [Lethan]: *drops bricks on everyone* caring is FUN!
2008-03-20 [Eloura]: Awww you DO care!!!
2008-03-20 [Lethan]: i sure do! *throws more*
2008-03-20 [sunabozu]: *turns into a little puppy* ow!
2008-03-20 [Eloura]: YAY!!! I ISH LOVELED!!!
2008-03-20 [sunabozu]: *little puppy lies on the ground unconcious*
2008-03-20 [Eloura]: *goes to little puppy and checks it*
2008-03-20 [Lethan]: *throws bricks at the puppy, too.*
2008-03-20 [sunabozu]: *little puppy's body is being knocked around by the brick, the puppy is still unconcious*
2008-03-20 [Lethan]: whoops, maybe i went a little too far. nah, you can never care enough! *aims for the puppy's skull*
2008-03-20 [Duke Devlin]: My god.
2008-03-21 [Pillowthief]: *Puts the poor sap of a dog out of its misery before its brain pan could be crush'eded*


(censored)
2008-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *blows up an orphanage*... I care the most.
2008-03-21 [Lethan]: give that man a commendation! and the key to the city, too.
2008-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *makes copies of the key to the city*
2008-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *has taken over magic society*
2008-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: And I'm pretty sure everyone here needs to visit The Confused Club... *cracks knuckles*... *twirls mace*...
2008-03-22 [Duke Devlin]: *pretends to flinch and run to visit it*
2008-03-22 [Pillowthief]: Hail!
2008-03-22 [Duke Devlin]: Heil... >:D
*cough*
2008-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: the gentleperson's club will be mine as soon as [Wilde Card] gets back on and hands it over... and I need to get more activity at the confused club before Fireblade hands it over...
2008-03-23 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm.. I'll help you then. XD Think it'll count if I just comment thousands of times? :P
2008-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Save the comments for B's D... we're almost at 20,000 comments! ...and 1,000 comment pages...
2008-03-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is sad*
2008-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *is laughing at you*
2008-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: What is the matter, my son...? Did someone try to kill you?
2008-03-23 [Pillowthief]: *cough*
2008-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Haters of the World is now under Penguin rule.
2008-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Berry Wine Bar has been usurped...
2008-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Why was there an entire day where there was no comments?! ...you pieces of shift... funking shift... *eats ramen*...
2008-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Damage! ...son of a bench...
2008-03-25 [Eloura]: O.O
2008-03-25 [sunabozu]: *tilts head* hm?
2008-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes steroids*
2008-03-25 [Lethan]: *disqualifies mort from the olympics*
2008-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: RAAHH! *breaks Leth in half*
2008-03-26 [Pillowthief]: *takes pictures*
2008-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *violently attacks cameraman*
2008-03-26 [Pillowthief]: Not Rick! Oh no... Now however are we going to air this?!?
2008-03-26 [Duke Devlin]: Great take over. >:) I shall let you know if I see any unsuspecting wikis. >:)
2008-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the news crew bursts in!*... *punches his way through them*...
2008-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: The Mutt Society is mine... and I got it from a guard! Bonus points!
2008-03-26 [sunabozu]: *turns into a puppy*
2008-03-26 [Pillowthief]: *harpoons the puppy!*
2008-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...*tosses the puppy on the pile*... you gotta stop killing so many puppies... at least until we get that new puppy processor I ordered... it turns dead puppies into money!
2008-03-27 [Pillowthief]: Might as well put them on the menu while we wait, some of them are turning brown. Well... maybe it was brown to begin with.
2008-03-27 [sunabozu]: hey guys*turns into a very cute puppy* how's it goin
2008-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Just pick through the brown spots... there's sure to be some good meat in there somewhere! ...*the pride of lions pounce on the puppy*...
2008-03-27 [sunabozu]: shi-!
2008-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: The Musketeers of Elftown is now in the clutches of the organization...
2008-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: That makes five wikis so far... I believe it's time to find a few houses to take over.
2008-03-27 [Lethan]: *gives mort a skelinton key* this should help.
2008-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it... it's the blue skeleton key. It only works with the blue doors... Elftown has green doors...
2008-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Forget the houses... I'll stick to wikis now...
2008-03-28 [nokaredes]: We need better conversations on this wiki.
2008-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe if someone would stop leaving! ...*smacks you*... *orders a pizza*...
2008-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *pizza arrives*... yes! ...*opens it*... *calls the pizza place*... I ordered a pepperoni pizza! ..."You sure? I could have sworn you said human torso..." *shrugs*... *eats the pizza*...
2008-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts up a sign stating that it's Misty hunting season*
2008-03-28 [Duke Devlin]: *gets mah gun* >:)
2008-03-29 [Pillowthief]: Shhhhhhhhhh... Actually, we really dont have to be quiet. She wont be going far.
2008-03-29 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -cuddles pen- herow!!
2008-03-30 [Pillowthief]: Ack!
2008-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons white, as well as himself, killing us both*... I die for a worthy cause...
2008-03-30 [Eloura]: *walks in sighs and cleans up the old crusted blood and puts out more* Keep it fresh people!
2008-03-30 [Lethan]: *slips on blood*...*threatens with legal action*...*misteriously dissapears*
2008-03-30 [Eloura]: *laughs minacally*
2008-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *ships Lethandros off to a factory in a wooden crate*
2008-03-30 [Eloura]: *grins grin appears and bloody confetti falls on everyone*
2008-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh no! ...the confetti is bleeding! ...*hires thousands of dollars worth of detectives to discover who killed the confetti*...
2008-03-30 [Eloura]: *giggles watching them unable to solve it*
2008-03-30 [nokaredes]: *wonders why everyone (except Pillowthief) is taking actions instead of talking*
2008-03-30 [Eloura]: *pokes the nok and says* It's real!!!
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *the detectives suspect Nok!*... *they kidnap her and take her into a dark room*... *they commence beating her in the face with a baseball bat*... "Shouldn't we ask her some questions?"... "Shh! You'll ruin the drama..." ..."But-"... "Shh!! Drama!"...
2008-03-31 [Eloura]: *laughs and disappears returning with mace*
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats...*... hey! Who stole my ramen?! ...Bun of a sitch... *gets a shotgun off the wall*... *shoots Eloura*... did you steal my ramen?! ...*shoots Nok*... did you?!! *shoots self*...
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ....................no you are! ...*kicks Nok in the balls*...
2008-03-31 [Eloura]: *laughs coming back as the undead*
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of the stock market, we're almost to 1,000 comment pages! ...come on you losers! Comment some more! ...and you! *points at himself*... go find some new members! ...who me? Yes you! ...couldn't be! ...then who? ...that joke sucks! *punches himself*... *starts brawling with himself on the floor*... *falls off a cliff*... (yes... there's a cliff in the diner)
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: 0____
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: _0___
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: __0__
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: __0__
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: _0_0_
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: 0_0__
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ___-_
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it... I missed that last note... *eats ramen*...
2008-03-31 [Eloura]: *laughs hard at the weird morty*
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Morty?! ...*slaps Nok*...
2008-03-31 [Eloura]: *kills the mory and laughs*
2008-03-31 [nokaredes]: *is going to need plastic surgery*
2008-03-31 [nokaredes]: Haha, Maury.
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I hate that guy...
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it... the Ramen Party is falling behind in the 2008 election polls... *eats ramen*... we need some kind of crazy stunt to get some publicity... Pillowthief! ...you can wrestle sharks, right?
2008-03-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello
2008-03-31 [Pillowthief]: *Thinks about wrestling Misty, but decides that it would be a...*
Bad Idea.


*Punches her instead*
2008-03-31 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Pen I think you and Theif would make a lovely couple...you both kinda think alike =^__^= it's so friggen adorable!!
2008-03-31 [Duke Devlin]: HAHA! >:D That's awesome. >:) I love you Wolf. XD
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha ha ha ha....... *slowly walks towards whitey with a knife*...
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: the gentleperson's club is now mine...
2008-03-31 [Pillowthief]: Well... we could be the straightest gay couple that you've ever seen... But we're not. *harpoons Wolf*
2008-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *orders more harpoons*
2008-04-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: hehehe -ducks harpoon and knife- oh come on, Pen you know you love me, and Thief, I know many, many gay straight guys. It's kinda sad really. But yeah, gay-straight love....it's amazing -sigh-
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... sounds illogical... Whitey... might you be on drugs?
2008-04-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: not that i'm aware of, though your ramen does taste somewhat funny........DID YOU SPIKE IT? -huggles pen-
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...spike it? ...why, only with love! .......and trace amounts of bull urine, THC, LSD, and other various fluids... *eats ramen*... whoa... pretty colors...
2008-04-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: you're so funny Pen!
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I put a lot of blood, sweat, and tears into making the food here... it's the blood that makes it taste so good!
2008-04-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: hmmm, O+? Year 1987 is the best ^.^


2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks on my bottles of O+ 1987... what's this?! ...darn it... they coagulated...
2008-04-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: oh, that's sad. -curls up on bar-
2008-04-01 [nokaredes]: I think the mid 90's had the best blood. And not just because you have to kill an emo teenager to get it! *shifty eyes*
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you don't even have to kill 'em... they're always cutting and bleeding anyway...
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wfm3_BMinhg ...I remember this old movie... it was crap!
2008-04-01 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: omg that was one of the worst movies ever made! D-wars is a close second...if not first
2008-04-01 [Pillowthief]: ....Wow.
2008-04-01 [sunabozu]: *little black puppy scampers in*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: Not that movie! D:
<3
2008-04-01 [sunabozu]: *little puppy scampers around Duke*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: *flails arms and runs in circles* AHHHH!!! *stops opens the door to the kitchen Resident Evil - Outbreak/CVX style*
2008-04-01 [sunabozu]: *little puppy barks*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: *runs around the room screaming, before reentering R.E style*
2008-04-01 [sunabozu]: *little puppy whines*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: *pokes tehh puppy*
2008-04-01 [sunabozu]: *puppy looks at duke and flinches*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: *shrugs*
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *zombies burst in and chase Duke*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: Nooo!!! *continues screaming, runs to the stairs - that now exist - and starts up them slowly R.E style*
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *zombies burst in from upstairs as well, trapping Duke on the staircase*
2008-04-01 [Duke Devlin]: D: This always happens to me! *Wesker dives in and p'wns a zombie or two*
2008-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *the zombies crowd around for the kill*... *suddenly, Chuck Norris bursts in*... *it turns out, unfortunately, that Chuck Norris too is a zombie... not by force, though... he chose to become one*
2008-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sup?
2008-04-02 [Pillowthief]: *Misty is attacked by the Chuck Norris zombie!*
2008-04-02 [sunabozu]: *barks* breast
2008-04-02 [Duke Devlin]: *has run and grabbed a nail-gun, with no nails* ... *looks at Chuck Norris* He is not a zombie. *looks away*
2008-04-02 [sunabozu]: *bites chuck in the shin*
2008-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Chuck's shin bites back... and then rapes you!*
2008-04-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO!*grabs sunabozu*NO RAPING HIM YOU EVIL ZOMBIE SHIN!*hits the shin with a metal baseball bat*
2008-04-03 [sunabozu]: arf!
2008-04-04 [Pillowthief]: *Chuck Norris' shin rapes the metal bat!*
2008-04-04 [sunabozu]: *turns into a giant fire breathing two headed dog*
2008-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Even for B's D, this conversation has gotten weird...
2008-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: WITCH! *points at Misty*... *puritans burst in and tackle misty*...
2008-04-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: *beats up the puritans with a different metal baseballbat*
2008-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *the Puritans don't believe in baseball bats*... *they continue beating up Misty*...
2008-04-05 [Pillowthief]: Why wont the dog die?! Ive harpooned it so many times... No! Not the witch! Im talking about that morphing puppy over there! We're going to need more harpoons... *Chucks the last couple at [sunabozu]*
2008-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *Captain Ahab suddenly bursts in with a rusty harpoon whilst exclaiming "ARRRR! THAR' SHE BLOWS!"*
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *Captain Ahab scathingly searches the seas for the mighty Moby Mutt!*...*As Captain Ahab walks to the port side of the ship, he trips because of his pegleg getting stuck in a hole in the floor*...*I mindlessly chuckle at the pitiful man's misfortune while eating a cup of ramen*...
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: As it turns out, the rusty harpoon pierced Captain Ahab's liver. The wound was never cleaned and, as a result, was severely infected. No one knew what Captain was saying as he laid in his deathbed muttering to himself. 


The moral of the story is to always wash your wounds, kids!
...*does a thumbs-up sign*...
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs [sunabozu] and runs to a corner*
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Now that I've added a bit of art, Bob's Diner now has class... *eats ramen*...
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: You mean that man touching that alien thing that is spaghetti and meatballs with eyes?
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... it's art. Duh.
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's retarded,that's what it is.
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare you mock the work of Michelangelo! ...he and the other three turtles are gonna get you.
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's retarded art,I hate it.
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Michelangelo, Leonardo, Donatello, Raphael, and the mysterious fifth turtle, Ghirlandaio, burst in and tackle Misty*... *they beat her in the face with dangerous ninja weapons*...
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*Whatever.
2008-04-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: wow, love the new "banner" addition -huggles pen-
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Say, would you two like a lollipop sprinkled with novacai- I mean, goodness?
2008-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: No thanks.
2008-04-06 [Lethan]: its not retarded art, its 'retart'!
2008-04-06 [Duke Devlin]: WTFFFF
2008-04-06 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I'ed love a lollipop Pen! you're so thoughtful!
2008-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, of course... *hands you a lollipop with, uh... goodness*...
2008-04-07 [nokaredes]: Hey! That lolipop's totally copyrighted to Shin Chan! You infringer! *points accusingly*
2008-04-07 [Pillowthief]: Where the hell do you think we get them from? Shin Chan and us go way back, supplies discounted by 30%. Well, Mort gets 45%, but that was just because of this one 'miscommunication' that he took offense to, which was really not my fault at all!
2008-04-07 [Pillowthief]: No wonder the guy's always playing with his food. He's hung less than Shin!


*PTs discount reduced to 20%*
2008-04-07 [Duke Devlin]: It was damn annoying. ;)
2008-04-07 [Pillowthief]: Was? Is! Sarcasm and cake, said I, but I found out later that the cake was a lie.
2008-04-07 [sunabozu]: ewww gross art
2008-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare you shrink the artwork to a more reasonable size! ...*excommunicates Devlin from the church of Mort*... and don't mock Mr. Elephant.
2008-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and you! Pillow guy! ...*points at sign on wall, "If thy words soundeth alike, thou shalt suffer by the pike."*... hmm... wait... hey! Who made that sign?!! ...*gets pike*... *dips it in poison, lemon juice, and salt... for extra pikiness*...
2008-04-07 [sunabozu]: *turns into a puppy*
2008-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: "Turns into a puppy"?! ...that... almost rhymes! *stabs the puppy with a pike*
2008-04-07 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: hehehe, -licks goodness lollipop- That's a weird word "lollipop" and puppy most certainly doesn't almost rhyme with Turn. and sun didn't even say those words, just acted them out -grin, glomps and huggles Pen-
2008-04-07 [sunabozu]: *wriggles and screams in pain in a little puppy voice* OH god no! *whines* arf! arf! WHY! DO YOU KEEP EATING ME!?!?!?
2008-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...of course 'puppy' doesn't rhyme with 'turn'... duh, stupid... it rhymes with 'into'. Didn't you learn anything in Chemistry?!
2008-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...eating you?! ...I have no idea what you're talking about... *glances around*... *hides roasted puppy leg behind his back*...
2008-04-07 [sunabozu]: dog mabey a fine meal but this dog isnt, im half bird and human dont i taste lowsy*barks*
2008-04-07 [Pillowthief]: Not according to the rest of the patrons. We're running low on stock and we may have to start eating your comments. Your words look rather 'un-tasty' to me and Im not sure if theres a law against the devouring of dead puppy sayings, but hell- if it sells, it sells.
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait... bird + human = puppy?!
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: Yea! Didn't you take physics 101!
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: No? ...I took physics 275... what'd I miss in 101?
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: Everything! *laughs* No wonder your confused
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I knew that sometimes duck + bear = anteater, but I didn't know about the puppy thing...
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *is already dead and raosted*
2008-04-08 [Lethan]: *is already eating the puppy, glancing from side to side in case anyone tries to steal his tasty dish*
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *makes a crunchy noise*
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: Yea! You so need to that the 101 class!!
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *comes back to life and letgs out a little puppy scream*
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: *jumps into the air and yelps*
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *little roatsed puppy dies again*huuuuuuuuuuuuuua
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: *looks around suspiciously*
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *disappears leaving puppy legs behind*
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: *spots the legs and goes* Hmmm messy eaters lately.
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *walks in* man that hurt*brushes of wings*
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: *looks over at you* Welcome to Bob's Diner how may I help you, ohh and what hurt?
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: I'll show you*turns into puppy*...just watch and wait
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: Ahhh YOUR the puppy *evil glint in eyes and picks you up setting you on the contour* I'll try to keep you safe :P
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *tilts head*how*wings come out*
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: I'm not sure, but i'm gonna try
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: NO! You aren't!
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: YES I AM!!!!!
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: No capitals in Neverland!
2008-04-08 [Eloura]: O.o? huh?..
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *growls then lets out an eagle call*
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?! ...*gets gun off the wall and shoots at everyone here*...
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: D: *is zombie jesus*
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *curls up into a metal ball*
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses the metal ball into a sack, ties up the sack, and hurls the sack into the ocean*... *eats ramen*... ah... another day's work done.
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...just 49 more comments...
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: :O D: 48!!!!!!!!
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait... what comes after 48?
2008-04-08 [sunabozu]: *reapprears in front of duke*
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: ... D: *COMBUSTS*
2008-04-08 [Pillowthief]: Do we have a metal puppy ghost ball now? Crap, this is worse than playing a redneck extra in Roadhouse.


*calls Ghost Busters*
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: The Ghost Busters are all retired! ...*calls the Spirit Crushers*... *they burst in and start yelling at Misty*... "You're never going to make it in life, you fat lard!"... hmm... not quite what I was hoping for, but it's still good...
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: XD Pretty good.. *applaudes* ... ... ... ...
2008-04-08 [Pillowthief]: *cough*
2008-04-08 [Pillowthief]: ...I mean *couch*.




Wait a minute...No, I meant *cough* the first time.
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: *coughs to cover up the insane ramblings of PT*
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn you people! You're coughing up germs all over my food! ...*brushes off the dead puppy pile*... that's just sick, man.
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: *coughs louder* >:) *coughs phlegmier*
2008-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: That's it... *gets the Solar Powered Destructo Ray (good for the environment!)*... *cloud passes over*... $#!+!!
2008-04-08 [Duke Devlin]: *laughs and coughs.. At the same time* >:) *throws large blanket over Mort's head*
2008-04-09 [Eloura]: *watches the insane rambling of bob's diner and eats a cellular shaped cookie*
2008-04-09 [Pillowthief]: Thats not a cookie! First its the Great Mexican Tortilla wall and now edible phones! Damn it, now I need to fork out more cash for a new one. Maybe ill go with the...


Banana Phone!
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Those banana phones sure are a-peeling! ...*the audience boos*...
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: The comment number seems to have gone way down... I hate it when Elftown does that... *harpoons elftown*...
2008-04-09 [Pillowthief]: *Elftron beeps and sparks fly, [Hedda] quickly patches it up with handy Duct Tape*
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... comments went back up... good ol' Duct Tape.
2008-04-09 [Eloura]: *laughs and pokes the duct tape getting shocked* Shocking isn't it! *audience applaudes*
2008-04-09 [Lethan]: *eats duck tape*
2008-04-09 [Pillowthief]: *[Hedda] smacks [Lethan] with the Anti-Tape-Eaters Stick of Doom. Omnious music begins*
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *wonders where that music is coming from*
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: fellowship of the stoners is under our control.
2008-04-09 [nokaredes]: Not the banana phone! T_T
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1Y73sPHKxw&feature=related
2008-04-09 [sunabozu]: *flies back in*
2008-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I never saw you fly out...
2008-04-09 [Eloura]: *just applaudes*
2008-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: 21 More comments...
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: do we want random comments?
2008-04-10 [Sir Soapy]: So's your face!
2008-04-10 [nokaredes]: The conversation in here is making less sense than normal... if possible...
2008-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I blame you.
2008-04-10 [nokaredes]: I demand proof that it's my fault!
2008-04-10 [Pillowthief]: *consults Gandhi, who confirms that its Noks fault*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: I concur!
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: i was thrown into the sea
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: *jumps into a boat and swims acroos the air* Look mommy I'm a monkey!!
2008-04-10 [Lethan]: *throws sun back into the sea* and it shall forever be your domain. *evil laugh*
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *little puppy scampers in*
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: *watches sun be thrown in the se and yells down* Ahoy there pup, need a lift? *the boat flies down clos to sun*
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *disappears and reappears beside the puppy as another puppy*
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: O.o
2008-04-10 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, that didnt make sense to me either.
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: I'm glad some one is agreeing ^^
2008-04-10 [Pillowthief]: I disagree with your agreeing.
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: I agree with you disagreeing about agreeing
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *puppies attack pillowthief*
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: Two comments!
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: WHOOT!!!!!!
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *one of the puppies rub up against elora's anckle*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: .. This place has too many puppies. *gets mah gunnn* .... *shoots 'em all* ...... *many times*
2008-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe Duke and I already had the agree/disagree argument.
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: *fails to understand*
D:
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *runs and hides then wags tail*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: .... *points above*
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *tilts head and point up with paw* arf?
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: We reached past 20000 now!!! *applaudes everyones hard work nd brings a few puppys back to life* I like puppies! :P
2008-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What's this? Duke doesn't remember me winning the agree/disagree argument?
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *turns into a little halfboy half puppy kid*
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: AWWWW HOW CUTE!!! *picks up sun, and cuddles*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: .. Sadly no! D:
*fails at life apparently*
Refresh my memory dear Morticus.
2008-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: 2007-09-16 Duke Devlin: Well Apologised Dolly =))) <3


2007-09-16 Mortified Penguin: [Fetish Dolly Koneko™]... you can't just let her boss you around! Rebel! Slap her in the face! ...spam all you want... and [Duke Devlin]! Stop agreeing with stuff!


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: Well.. I've done my court ordered community service for the day... time to relax and eat some ramen...


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: I will agree with stuff all I want thankyou oO
If I agree with something, I will say so. Why does it matter to you?


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: By disagreeing with me, you've technically agreed to stop agreeing... which means I win.


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: That's loser talk, Koneko... you've dissapointed me.


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: I'm sorry, but I'm done helping you people with your sad humanoid problems for the day... ask me for an appointment and I'll contact you later. Thank you. (by the way, that'll be $12.99 for services rendered)


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: Thats terrible logic.
I meant that I agree with things... that I agree with oO
So you don't win, because there was no 'contest' to begin with =P


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: Pah $ indeed XD


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: Well, I believe there was a contest. If you think there wasn't, then we disagree. Which is what I told you to do. So ha. I win.


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: Yes.. Lets all bow down to the ultimate power of the [Mortified Penguin] -___-
There was no contest. Deal =)


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: Yes... let's. And thank you for your continued disagreement. It means a lot to me. (where's my money?!)


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: You are quite welcome.. And you get no money =P No money for disagreeable penguins =P


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: I'm not the one disagreeing. You are. I'm simply agreeing with the fact that you're disagreeing with my agreement of- forget this! I'm too sexy for this! ...*puffs a giant cigar*... *wears his standard issue penguin tux*...


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: Fine.., you can win XP
Smoking is bad for you.., especially you. XD


2007-09-17 Mortified Penguin: What?! ...you can't agree with me winning!! ...NOHOHOOO!!! ...*melts*...


2007-09-17 Duke Devlin: Hahahaaaaa I ruined your logic.. wait.., no I didn't. =( I've confused myself. Oh well. Fine.., you don't win.. NO! You do!! Ha.. I disagree with your last
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *cuddles elora* he talks too long*pulls out a cookie from a backpack*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: D: NOW I remember. XD
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: I agree *smiles and cuddles the cute little puppy boy*
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *eats some of the cookie then cuddles again then yawns*im getting sleepy
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: Awwww *pets your head and cuddleing you close* How cute!
2008-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn puppy infestation... *releases some deadly snakes*... that'll take care of 'em!
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *starts to fall asleep but still awake*hmmm.....
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: ... >> Didn't I SHOOT you? *glares* .... *sniffs and pulls out Bluderbuss*
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *falls asleep*zzzzzzzzzzzzzz
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: I brought this one back to life. MY PUPPY!! :P *keeps puppy safe with me petting head to let you sleep*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: ... No phoenix downs.. *points to sign put up while Mort was sleeping*
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: *kicks alittle*zzzzzzzzzzzz*twitches*zzzzzzz
2008-04-10 [Eloura]: *keeps cuddling the puppy*
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: ..... ..... Don't any of you people play Final Fantasy? oO
2008-04-10 [sunabozu]: zzzzzzzzzz
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: .... *shootz*
2008-04-10 [Sir Soapy]: ...I believe myself and the guy with the running pickle obsession *points at Pillow* are fans.
2008-04-10 [Duke Devlin]: .. Hey Mort on another account. XD
And GOOD. So you should be. >:|
2008-04-10 [nokaredes]: Clearly she used her potion before you put up the sign banning the use of them... so... I conclude that she is allowed!
2008-04-11 [Eloura]: YAY!!!!
2008-04-11 [nokaredes]: ...however, the dog is an abomination to God, so it must be killed! *starts throwing pebbles at it*
2008-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *hurls a boulder*... finally... something fun!
2008-04-11 [Duke Devlin]: Darn.. Well, at least it's still being dealt with. >:)
2008-04-11 [Pillowthief]: *Looks up* Oh, hey Shin! What's this? Nice, my new order for signs saying "Dogs Are Abominations" and "Dog Tastes Like Chicken", good good. And sorry about that comment the other day about the, hey! *PTs discount reduced to 15%* Wait! No, no, it was just a miscommunication! Crap.
2008-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... dog chicken...
2008-04-11 [Duke Devlin]: ... Sounds yummy.
2008-04-11 [Eloura]: *protects the puppy* Save the puppy!!!
2008-04-11 [Pillowthief]: *Points at "Dogs are Abominations" sign*
2008-04-11 [Eloura]: NEVER!
2008-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *Bob's Diner's two-and-a-half walls are now full of posters and signs*
2008-04-12 [Eloura]: *eats all posters and signs* yummy!
2008-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *points to the sign in your stomach saying "Please Don't Eat The Signs!"*
2008-04-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: WOW!It's crazy here.
2008-04-12 [Duke Devlin]: ... YOU'RE crazy here! >:| HAHA.
Oh well. Keel all of thaa Doggzzz.
2008-04-12 [Eloura]: *brings the please don't eat the signs sign up and hangs it on the wall and say's* NO KILLING THE DOGZZZSS!!!
2008-04-12 [Pillowthief]: Yes, please don't kill them, they're on the endangered li... Wait. No, no, we have tons of 'em. *Gets out the 'Dog Hunting Season: Open' sign and my Elmer Fudd hat and shotgun*




Anybody notice that Elmer Fudd has a double barrel that he never has to reload? Probably a good thing, because he can't hit shit.
2008-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Today's hunters hunt with uzis. *fires multiple rounds at a squirrel*
2008-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey ma! I shot us some supper! ...*scoops up squirrel remains*...
2008-04-12 [Pillowthief]: I prefer the Thrower myself, but with the price of gas now-a-days...
2008-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, but it's totally worth it... and it's a lot quicker, because it not only kills the game, but cooks it as well.
2008-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: .............you're WAY too excited! *punches Nok*
2008-04-13 [nokaredes]: What? o_o
2008-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh? ...*eats ramen*... mmm... tastes like happy!
2008-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *chokes and dies on the ramen*
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *laugsh at the death and say's* New "Arsinic Ramen" in every flavor imaginable! Give it to yor enemy's friends great at party's!!!
2008-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Can't you read?! That sign clearly says "No Advertisements"! *points at a sign on the wall with "36dsfفيعdsfdالم436:4" written on it*
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *wonders you put new signs up and eats the sign* What sign! Besides, it's for the diner!!
2008-04-13 [Pillowthief]: Havent we talked to you before about eating our signs?
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: Noooooooooooo *say's innocently*
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: .... Y'all should stop eating the signs.. I need them to fatten up my bacon bit babies.
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *laughs* I was just thinking about those babies!! *shifty eye look* We need more!!!!! *munches on a sign*
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: .. More signs?
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: Noo!!! More of your bacon bit babies!!!
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: Oh! I see.. *has more bacon bit babies* .. Here ya go! *throws them in a frying pan*
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *laughs* I take it, it's no longer rape *grins and say's* DId you two move in to make wonderful bacon bit babies!!! *laughs and say's* Thank you! *serves them t a customer only she and duke can see*
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: What? I see no customer! Dont let them go to waste! D:
And.. Rape? :D
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *points at a table* Right there!!! and yes mr. bacon had to rape you the first time for you to have the babies!!
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yes! :O
I recall it all now.. He lives in my bag! >>>>>
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *giggles* Oh! that must be fun for party's!!!!!
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: Yep! Very much so.
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: Yummy!!! *giggles*
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: >:)
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *bounces through roonm*
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: ...
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: The signs are laced with hyper stuff!
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: ... Oh dear.
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: *giggles and say's* Yea!!!
2008-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: WE WON. >:) The WG
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: I'M SO GLAD FOR IT!!!
2008-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: The WG what now? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-04-13 [Eloura]: Werewolf Game !!!!!! (it's in my mood!)
2008-04-14 [Lethan]: are you sure its not the WIG? everyone loves winning wigs.
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: This place is pretty cool! Hmmm...now what to order...
2008-04-14 [Fearathress]: .....
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *waves* Hi Fearathress!
2008-04-14 [Duke Devlin]: Araglas!!!! :D You are here. XD
And.. Mort you have joined us! >:)
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: Eloo! Someone invited me to join, I think it was mortified penguin who did...lol
2008-04-14 [sunabozu]: you did my dear
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *waves* HI!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: HI arag *smiles and waves and huggles the suna*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *waves at Eloura* HI!!!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: HI!!!!!! *bounces around*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *spins in circle* WEEEE
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid people with your waving! *goes on a rampage*... *shoots Pillowthief 88 times*...
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *hides under couch* ACJK!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *laughs at pillowthief pulls araglas out from under couch and say's* I ate the sign that say's Happens all the time here
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: lol ok *sits down* Wow....
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *smiles*You may be shot or attacked once and a while (or all the time) But this is normal!
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: Ok ^_^ Then I have nothing to worry about!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: Yep! So what would you like? *whips out notebook and pencil*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: Coffee and breadsticks
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and slash eloura violently*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *looks around* Does this mean I have to make my own food?
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *stickes self back up and gives the lions food and say's* Silly lions *yawns and goes and gets you food and drink* Yummy!
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: Lol Ok.....*gets out three dollars*
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *takes money and hands you your stuff* 
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: Thankies! *eats breadsticks and drinks coffee* Yum!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: It's some of the good food hear
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: ^_^
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... of course it is. *worms crawl out of the bread*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *eats all the bread* It is very good!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: :::^_^::: *eats ramen*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *starts to dance*
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *children pass by*... sweet! Now's my chance! Hey kids! Who wants to buy a gun?! ...*sells guns to little children*...
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *children aim their guns at me*... "Give us back our money!"...
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *watches and then turns into the clown from 'IT' and steals the childrens souls*
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *children try to fire them at me*... sucka's! Bullets sold separately! *gets hit by a bullet*... what?! Where'd you get that bullet?! ..."Brought it from home!"... sh*t... *dies*...
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *turns into Jebus and brings Mort back to life* Live I say!!!!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *yawns and throws the Mortified penguins body onto the pile and sighs* We really gotta make some food outta these body's
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Good! Now to get revenge on those kids! ...*approaches them*... *gets hit with a barrage of bullets*... oh yeah... they got guns. *dies*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *sighs* Live I say!!!! *lightning hits Mort's body*
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *body gets charred*... *remains dead*... *buzzards fly at me!*...
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *sighs and injects nannoids into his blood stream (miniture robots that repair broken tissue* Ok with these you can't die....but you can live!
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *throws body in pile again*
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *nannoids take over*... *goes on a nannoid induced killing spree*...
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *hides in electromagnetic field that will kill the nannoids if they enter it*
2008-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *the nannoids approach the field*... *they died, taking their host with them*... *is dead again*...
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: *glares at now very full body bin*
2008-04-14 [Araglas]: *scratches head* Hmmmmm...ok I gotsit!!!!! *because Dr.Frakenstein and takes apart the Morts and makes a Super Indestructable Mort*
2008-04-14 [Eloura]: YUmmy!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *dies from some kind of disease... but at least my corpse is indestructable!*
2008-04-15 [sunabozu]: *puppy boy speaks* i wish the milk man would deliver my milk in myonin
2008-04-15 [nokaredes]: Wow. I haven't seen someone actually purchase food here in ages...
2008-04-15 [Pillowthief]: Finally recovers from getting shot 88 times.


Seriously, who shoots someone 88 times? I think the first 4 or 5 did me in, the 83 following shot were alittle overkill. Its kinda like that one story I heard about the two cops unloading 23 shots into this guy, who they found out later did not have a uzi on him. The only thing was that both cops were carring Berrettas, which hold a max of 10 shots, 9 in the mag and one in chamber. That means that, if they hit him with every single shot they fired (which seems unlikely as I have seen many cop movies and have figured that they're not too big on marksmanship) they would have had to reload at least once.


It was a routine traffic stop and they guy was unarmed. W.T.F.
2008-04-15 [Pillowthief]: Poisons Sunabozu's myonin (whatever that is)
2008-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: We die too much here. D:
2008-04-15 [Eloura]: Agreed!
2008-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots Eloura*
2008-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: Oh noes! Oh well., xD
Mort! You died., :( DON'T DIE SO SOON NEXT TIME. You need to help us think. XD
2008-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...don't say it like it was my fault... it was... Eloura's! ...*shoots Eloura some more*... maybe... *shoots Eloura even more just in case*...
2008-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: *shoots her gangsta mob style*
2008-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm bored... I should do something...
2008-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: Literally? Uh, why not go out?
2008-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, why not... *eats ramen*...
2008-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: Ah you did!
Or at least.. You logged out. XD
2008-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: What time was it there anyway?
2008-04-15 [Eloura]: *comes back and rubs head and gets rid of drone eloura* Glad i wasn't here
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: *walks in with flame throwers* I need food, I've been killing flesh eating Zombies all night!
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh *licks the tip of a pen* Oh wait.. Thats a journalist thinger.. XD
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: *laughs* Well, if you want to add zombie dishes to your menu, I've got loads out in the truck!
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: Ah go for it! Add it yourself!
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: Ok Zombie body food is ready *was in kitchen making different foods with zombie parts*
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: OOOooo
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: I've got Zombie burgers, Zombie Hotdogs, Zombie Chili, Zombie Chicken Salad, and some other stuff!
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: Zombie CHICKEN?! Sounds adventurous. :O
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: Yes! Its really good, and it has Zombie eyeballs in it to!
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: Euchies.
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: ANd then I have some Zombie Finger Cabobs, and then lets see, roasted Haggas......and *looks into kitchen to see what else*
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: NOOOOOOOO D:
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: What?
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: No idea. :P
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: lol so do you want any?
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: Nah I just ate. :P
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: ok, *starts to eat some Zombie burgers* T^asty,....
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: CHASTY,.
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: lol yum! *grabs some finger fries* These are good to!@
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: XP I bet.
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: ^_^
2008-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: :D
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: ^_^
2008-04-16 [Eloura]: *walks in*
2008-04-16 [Araglas]: HI!!! Want to try some Zombie flesh fries?
2008-04-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: Araglas? Dude, I haven't talked to you in ages!!!! -huggles pen-
2008-04-17 [Araglas]: I know!! *has on apron and is cooking* Want some Zombie burgers?? Or something that involves Zombie parts?
2008-04-17 @Not logged in user@: Haggis isn't weird enough for B's D...
2008-04-17 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: indeed I do!!! zombie burgers sound amazing! -jumps up and sits on bar- whoot!
2008-04-18 [Araglas]: Haggis is plenty weird if its made from the stomache of a zombie! Ok one Zombie Burger, do you want Zombie finger fries with that?
2008-04-18 [Eloura]: *raises hand and say's* I ask for what whites having
2008-04-18 [Duke Devlin]: *eatz ztuff*
2008-04-18 [Araglas]: Okay make it a double *walks into the kitchen and a chainsaw can be heard* Down dangit! I just want a piece of your leg! And some of your fingers!!! *more bangs and slicing*
2008-04-18 [Eloura]: *giggles and sits on a stool at the bar waiting quietly*
2008-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELLO PEEPS!
2008-04-19 [Eloura]: HEY Misty!!!!!!
2008-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi Eloura.
2008-04-20 [Eloura]: Hi Hi!
2008-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: What's up?
2008-04-20 [Eloura]: Not much
2008-04-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: How are you?
2008-04-21 [Eloura]: I'm ok! You?
2008-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *stumbles in*... whoa! ...that was one F***ed up week! ...*looks around*... hey! You aren't the same prostitutes from last night... well... except for you... *points at Nok*...
2008-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...today is the 21st... so why can I still see most of the comments from the 16th?! ...buns of sitches! I'LL KILL YOU ALL!! (mostly Misty though)... *eats ramen*...
2008-04-21 [Eloura]: *yawns* You kill meh all the time, and ain't no prostitute, though i think pillowthief is
2008-04-21 [Duke Devlin]:
I'm quite disappointed by the lack of commentz toooo. :(
Suckish.
And I ain't a prostitute either.. Least.. Not for you. ;)
2008-04-21 [Eloura]: *laughs* go DUKE!!! *applaudes* I am upset by this also, but there is never anyone to talk to..
2008-04-21 [Araglas]: Well I'm making food, and well I'm not your prostitute, which reminds me....I need to see my pimp....later though, ok here is the food! You have Zombie Hambergers with Finger fries, Haggis, made from the stomache of a Zombie, some Zombie Pizza, Spegehtti and then some subs. *lays it all out on the bar*
2008-04-21 [Duke Devlin]: *eatz nothin* *is a gangsta today*
2008-04-21 [Araglas]: *pokes around in kitchen* Ok, I'm almost out of Zombies...I need someone to go and kill me some Zombies!
2008-04-21 [sunabozu]: AHH! YOU POISONED MY MORNING!
2008-04-21 [Araglas]: Waaa? Sorry! But I do need more Zombies...
2008-04-21 [sunabozu]: *is dead*
2008-04-21 [Araglas]: oops.....oh well....
2008-04-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH NO!
2008-04-21 [Araglas]: lol Misty!! *walks out of kitchen* Would you like some Zombie finger Fries?
2008-04-21 [sunabozu]: *little puppy scampers in*
2008-04-21 [Araglas]: Hey little guy, want some Zombie finger fries?
2008-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *Ratty the foul mouthed rodent bursts in*... DAAAAAAAAMN! ...*he chugs a beer*... *he turns around and looks at Misty*... Damn! What you lookin' at, bitch?!
2008-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P-AYAv0IoWI
2008-04-22 [Duke Devlin]: Guns 'n' Roses. :O
2008-04-22 [Eloura]: O.o?
2008-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Go Slash! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Then there's ol' Skynyrd... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y2YICwlDVfg ...we got the DJ to play this song last at the prom... we all pretended to hold up lighters... then some weird guy whipped out a real lighter and held it up... we thought he was an arsonist... I... I tried to be a hero! ...I tackled the guy and started punching him! ...that's when he got his gun! All of a sudden- ...ah, screw it... *eats ramen*...
2008-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Wow. Sooo, I havent had the internet and now there's like 15 pages of new comments. Im not even going to read them. It was probably going along the lines of:
Death
Puppies
More Death
Zombies
Eating Noodles
Even More Death
Ninja Bard
Then Some More Death


Hopefully we finally got rid of the puppies, that was getting plain annoying.
2008-04-23 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: I love the idea of zombie haggis. I must say ^.^ -huggles pen-
2008-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I haven't seen puppies in at least two pages... I wonder what happened to them... *eats ramen with puppy corpses in it*...
2008-04-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: that's sad!!! don't eat puppy corpses, that's not cool!!
2008-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... decomposition... *eats ramen*...
2008-04-24 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -takes out puppy corpses- =P
2008-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *hugs wolf*... *conspicuously staples a "Stab me repeatedly" sign on Wolf's back*...
2008-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *White Wolf seems disgruntled*


Apologize


Point and laugh


Eat ramen


Put it in




*Mort eats ramen*


*Mort gains +1 Dexterity*
2008-04-24 [Pillowthief]: *White Wolf is Unaware*


Put it in?


Harpoon


Make fun of Misty1


Set Puppy/Ninja Bard traps




*Harp'wns Misty1*


*PT Levels Up*
*PT gains +1 Accuracy, +1 Speed*
2008-04-24 [Araglas]: *is lookinf for weapons* Need to get more Zombies
2008-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort is awakened from a deep slumber by Araglas*


Sing happy songs


Eat Ramen


Kill


Put it in




*Mort kills Araglas*


*Mort eats ramen*


*Mort gains +1 Leadership, -2 Humanity, +5 Pounds*
*Mort Downgrades to Co-Chef*
2008-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Co-Cooks some food*... does anyone know where the co-hotsauce is? I've gotta co-put some on this co-burger... then I'm going to go snort some co-caine... then my blood will co-agulate... *co-eats ramen*...
2008-04-25 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: wow, Pen you've written more than normal. I'm not unaware, i'm just not paying attention to you. -huggles- thanks for the hug though!! -rips off stab me sign!-
2008-04-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*You harpoon me when I'm not even here?
2008-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... *harpoons pixiestickchick*...
2008-04-25 [Pillowthief]: *harpoons Turkey*
2008-04-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY!NO HARPOONING TURKEY!
2008-04-25 [Pillowthief]:   
2008-04-25 [Araglas]: Lol
2008-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I see a few B's D members online that aren't commenting... *gets flamethrower off the wall*...
2008-04-26 [Eloura]: I'm here *sticks tounge out at Mortified Penguin* Just not talkin cause no one talks to me >.<
2008-04-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi Eloura.*harpoons [Pillowthief] and [Mortified Penguin] together*
2008-04-26 [Eloura]: Hi Misty. Nice!!!!!!
2008-04-26 [nokaredes]: I missed some awesome stuff on the 24th... I should log in more...
2008-04-26 [nokaredes]: You know, when they pull that harpoon out, doctors'll only be able to save one of them...
2008-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Doctors, shmoctors... *pulls harpoon out himself*... *dies instantly*...
2008-04-26 [Eloura]: *walks in kills everyone sits down and suddenly a martini is in hand sips at it*
2008-04-26 [nokaredes]: Wow. That's some kind of continuity error, there.
2008-04-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: YES!HE'S DEAD!*dances for joy*
2008-04-27 [Pillowthief]: *Still has harpoon stuck in him*
I know that I can not Harpwn some right back (according to the Harpoon Man Manuel), but maybe if I...


*Lunges at Misty1, harpooning her as well!*
2008-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *the dead Mort dangles on what is becoming a harpoon shish kabob*... *dead Mort eats ramen*...
2008-04-27 [Sir Soapy]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-04-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *dodges the Harpoon by jumping on Sir Soapy's head*
2008-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-04-27 [Pillowthief]: ?


Your logic confounds me. I have already skewered you on my harpoon. You cannot dodge a harpoon that has already skewered you. Just for that, Sir Soapy has been included in the skewering.


*Harpoons Sir Soapy!*
2008-04-27 [Araglas]: *walks in with army of Zombies* Ok, here is an all you can eat human flesh exstravaganza! Now eat them, get fat, then die so I can cook tyou! *zombies start to eat people*
2008-04-27 [Pillowthief]: Ah...Crap. Didn't see that one coming.


No way am I going to die skewered on the same harpoon as Misty! *Calls Bruce Campbell* Groovy.
2008-04-27 [Araglas]: *zombies eat Misty, Eloura, Sir soapy, Mort, and then start to chase Pillowthief*
2008-04-27 [Eloura]: *comes back in and see's another clone dead and pouts putting out more eloura clones*
2008-04-27 [Araglas]: *zombies eat all the clones* Thats eat keep getting fatter! *is in kitchen cleaning stuff*
2008-04-27 [Eloura]: *ptoduces more clones and yawns watching them eat the cones* As long as they don't eat me we'll be fine *says from zombie free zone*
2008-04-27 [Araglas]: *zombies get realy big and can't move* Excellent!! They are ripe for harvesting! *grabs chainsaw and lights go out, chainsaw is heard, then some cutting and squelching, lights turn back on and room is clean and I am in the kitchen happily making food*
2008-04-27 [Eloura]: *laughs coming in again and say's* Bob's diner is clean!!! *looks around sits down on a clean bar stool*
2008-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Your zombie fattening process is criminally inefficient! By making your zombies eat humans, you are wasting a lot of potential zombies. By simply getting the zombies to bite the humans, turn them into zombies, and getting the larger group of zombies to feed on Granny's New Soy Soylent Greens, you can not only increase the number of zombies in your dish, but also make the process a lot quicker and simpler! ...this has been a public service announcement from Mort (Self-Proclaimed Entrepreneur and Bureaucrat)... *eats ramen*...
2008-04-27 [Araglas]: *smils* Yup and I know, I like to do things the hard way
2008-04-27 [Eloura]: *laughs and applaudes araglas*
2008-04-28 [nokaredes]: *has been sitting here the whole time and has not been involved by name in any of the preceding chaos*
2008-04-28 [Duke Devlin]: Wow I missed this place.. The lack of Devlin's in this place is sad. =[
2008-04-28 [Pillowthief]: Not really.




And Soylent Green is People!!!
2008-04-28 [Pillowthief]: (Self respect for Mort goes up +2 for the reference to Soylent Green. Bravo, you movie affectionado you.)
2008-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *upgrades to Mortatron*... *becomes a giant destructive robot*... *stomps Nok for no particular reason*... *eats ramen made of copper wiring*...
2008-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Robot lonely. Robot need love. *robot finds love* Crap. Robot got STD. *Robot scratches his lug nuts*
2008-04-28 [Araglas]: *laughs so hard I die*
2008-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Robot violently kicks the corpse!*
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: MORP
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Massive Orangatan Role Playing?!
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: Precisely my child. *wise, knowing look*
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, father. Your teachings are wise. But... what happens when an unstoppable force moving along a straight path comes upon an immovable, invincible object?
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: Surely under that circumstance, either the 'unstoppable force' would divert it's course slightly, by a fraction upon impact - or a terrible logic-breakdown will occur, rendering everything in the universe useless, due to this terrible mishap.
I like the second. :) Badly explained as it was.
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: So... the second one is a bad scenario... right? ...*hides immovable and unstoppable objects behind his back*...
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]:
I should imagine so, yes.. Of course, you could attempt such an event, but surely it would be somewhat pointless - it could create a terrible paradox, and cause everything to fold in on itself. -___- So stable is our world.
And you can put them back where you got 'em from.. You have no unstoppable force anyway. XP
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure I do. *flexes muscles*... check these babies out. And the immovable object? Got it from eBay.
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: Oh wow, impressive.. =O I would hardly think that unstoppable however.. Now eBay, they have everything, so that is entirely understandable! :O And believable!
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: eBay itself is both immovable and unstoppable!
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: Ah! Quite so! A unstoppable force of epic proportions!
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: So what would happen if eBay and Google collided?
2008-04-29 [Duke Devlin]:
WOAH! You know that 'second scenario' we were talking about..?
Well, multiply that several hundred times over. See that? That is the outcome of an eBay X Google collision.
2008-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOOO!! ...*starts to build an immovable, invincible bomb shelter from parts bought on eBay*... *some parts don't arrive because the jerks working for UPS stole them*...
2008-04-30 [Pillowthief]: "What? Why are you looking at me like that? They fell off the truck I tell you!"
2008-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *FedEX guys gather ominously around the UPS guy*
2008-04-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok I commented.
2008-04-30 [Nc-17]: ...sweet! ...I finally got this username back after 1,000 something days...
2008-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-04-30 [nokaredes]: *is a people pancake*
2008-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses people syrup on you*
2008-04-30 [nokaredes]: *is unhealthy for you*
2008-04-30 [Pillowthief]: *Eats you anyways*
Man, I love pancakes!
2008-04-30 [Duke Devlin]: Yumtastic.
2008-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Screw pancakes! ...go waffles!
2008-04-30 [Duke Devlin]: *swats the waffles*
2008-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *waffles burst in through the roof and attack*
2008-04-30 [Duke Devlin]: Noo! D: *Wails*
2008-04-30 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -huggles pen- wailing, that's new!
2008-05-01 [Pillowthief]: The chickens from the Legend of Zelda take offense! They counter-attack the waffles!
2008-05-01 [sunabozu]: *little puppy walks around on hind legs carrying a big bowl of speggeti*
2008-05-01 [Duke Devlin]: *watches while eating Popcorn. <3*
2008-05-01 [sunabozu]: *little puppy barks and is still walking around holding the bowl high up over his head*arf arf!
2008-05-01 [Duke Devlin]: ........................................... *jabs*
2008-05-01 [sunabozu]: *little puppy wines*m!
2008-05-01 [nokaredes]: [sunabozu], are you some kind of furry?
2008-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: .........puppies are back. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-01 [Pillowthief]: *Readies Flamethrower*
2008-05-01 [Pillowthief]: (What's 'speggeti'?)
2008-05-02 [Lethan]: like spaghetti, but with more spag.
2008-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no, no... it's more of a mixture of spaghetti and yetti.
2008-05-02 [sunabozu]: sorry my english isnt good
2008-05-02 [Eloura]: *snuggles the poor puppy and gives the puppy jerky*
2008-05-02 [Pillowthief]: Let me warm up that jerky for you... *ignites Thrower, toasts puppy into jerky*
2008-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELL TO THE FUCCKING NO!*grabs flamethrower and toast pillowthief into jerky*
2008-05-03 [nokaredes]: No, no, you guys have it all wrong. Speggeti is spaghetti made out of wood!
2008-05-03 [Pillowthief]: *couch* *breathes smoke*


That the best you can do, pussies? (rip-off from Sin-City)


*hits self-explode remote for Thrower*
*Misty1 explodes!*


You've gained 126exp and 13g
Exp to next level: 138400exp
2008-05-03 [Pillowthief]: *Sprags Nok*


Crap, frikken' wooden grenades!
2008-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *threw the thrower in the air and ducked under a table at the last minute*
2008-05-03 [nokaredes]: I clearly don't know all of the definitions of "sprag"...
2008-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... Sprag... speaking of Sprag, I need to go buy Grand Theft Auto 4...
2008-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I heard that was a good game.
2008-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... you heard, huh? ...hmmmm... *buys something else*...
2008-05-03 [nokaredes]: My roommate has that game. The graphics are awesome. The cars are based off of real cars, and you can change your ringtone.
2008-05-03 [nokaredes]: You don't get money for carjacking other people anymore, though...
2008-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....
2008-05-03 [Duke Devlin]: What the Deuce?!
2008-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: As long as the game still has cheats, it should be awesome...
2008-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,very awesome.
2008-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets harpoon*... *slowly walks towards Misty*...
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: SPFFYYYYY
2008-05-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*I know!*walks off*
2008-05-04 [Pillowthief]: ...Thought I fixed that...
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry... I'll handle this... *kamehamehas blink*...
2008-05-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *comes back with a creepy guy*
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh no! Now there's two Mistys!
2008-05-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *buys Mortified Penguin from the creppy guy and puts a collar on Mortified Penguin*Now you belong to me
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I know nothing of this "creppy" guy... sounds suspicious to me.
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: *shifty eyes* .... *runs away*
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *hurls a plunger at you*... Woops... now I need a new stirring stick for the soup...
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, toilet brush... I knew you were good for something... *stirs soup*
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhh yes.. Toilet brushes are also good for kebabs.. Don't ask how. oO Ever played 'Broken Sword: Shadow of the Templars'? -____-'
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: No... I have not. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Good. Stay far away from it. You are safe.. It is frustratingly annoying. D: *screams*
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I would assume so, with a "broken sword"... you'd think they'd give you a better weapon... like a gun.
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Yeh! D: And.. Right, get this - You don't even get to USE the damn broken sword. -___- Or any weapon really.. You just find random shit.. And try to SOLVE the puzzle! D: Its really weird.. You have to make sure you talk to everyone in every location at the right time. -______- AND it is point and click. >> ON PLKAYSTATION? Oo
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn you, plkaystation! ...that's why I recently bought an xbox360...
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Shut up, shit spelling. XD I play my brothers 360. :D
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You need to get Call of Duty 4... or else. *the chickens crack their knuckles*... *they suddenly realize that they are chickens and therefore have no knuckles*... *they explode*...
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ah my brother has it, I shall play it. ;) I love Assassin's Creed, play that?
Go to hell exploding chickens!!!!!!!!
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Chickens NOOOOOO!!! ...*eats chicken ramen*... Assassin's Creed is cool.
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: *eats chicken.. Noodles* ;) I love doing the crazy Leap of Faith.. I dunno, I just love the sound of the hawk as you do it. XD
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...you ate chicken 'noodles'! ...you sicko. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Noodles taste good. =] And they are.. Noodly. Anyhow. Whatcha up to?
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Reading/harassing/listening to metal/eating ramen
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh sounds like fun. :D I get to go home soooon. -____- Have to walk back through town. -____-
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucka'! ...I don't have to walk anywhere anymore... now that I got this shiney new wheelchair... *old guy comes crawling in yelling about something*... shut up, old man! *runs him over*... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: Good plan. ;) Damnit I should really go soon. D:
2008-05-04 [Pillowthief]: Maybe you should.
Go.
2008-05-04 [Duke Devlin]: I did. ;)
And now I am home, have been for several hours.
2008-05-04 [Pillowthief]: To hell, I mean.


Wakka wakka wakka.
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I've been there... it's alright, I guess. I'd rather just go to Florida, but there aren't as many celebrities. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I've never been intimidated by one of those "don't mess with my friends" things... until now. 
2008-05-05 [Pillowthief]: I think I pooped a little...
2008-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: If that's all, then you should be thankful... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: That picture isn't going away until you all comment it away.
2008-05-06 [nokaredes]: I kind of like that picture.
2008-05-06 [nokaredes]: It's better than the pictures in my other tab, anyway...
2008-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...witch! *points at Nok*... *villagers burst in with pitchforks and torches*...
2008-05-06 [Araglas]: No!! *hides under table*
2008-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *they grab Araglas, who seems suspicious*
2008-05-06 [Araglas]: Oh well, should have chosen a better hiding spot....*tries to escape*
2008-05-07 [Duke Devlin]: I love the one of hers that says 'Dont be fooled by my appearance' or something.. I dunno.. What exactly about her appearance is supposed to fool us into thinking nice things? D:
2008-05-07 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, it seems I did poop myself a little. Brb.
2008-05-07 [Duke Devlin]: Ewies.
FISHING FOR STRAWS.
Thats right..
2008-05-07 [Pillowthief]: All better. My mommy always told me to carry a fresh pair of undies with me in case of situations like these.
2008-05-07 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh! Your mummy is correct! You are always having such accidents.
I, however, merely have narcoleptic fits. =D
2008-05-07 [Pillowthief]: Bet those go through the washer easier...
2008-05-07 [Duke Devlin]: Damn straight they do! =O
2008-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I used to always wear undies... but I kept ruining 'em. So one day I thought... "Mort you douche," I said aloud for some reason, "you should just stop wearing them there undies." ...so, I did.
2008-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...does it feel a bit drafty in here...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh wait... it probably does... seeing as how there is no roof or walls...
2008-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: How can we even consider this a diner?! ...it's more of a hole in the ground nowadays... Not a nasty, dirty, wet hole, filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell, nor yet a dry, bare, sandy hole with nothing in it to sit down on or to eat...
2008-05-08 [nokaredes]: We should rebuild. The code inspector's gonna be around soon. You know... that one we killed is bound to respawn...
2008-05-08 [Araglas]: Hmmm.....think he'll like my Zombie burgers?
2008-05-08 [sunabozu]: *little puppy wakes up*
2008-05-08 [Araglas]: PUPPPY!~!!! *pets puppy*
2008-05-08 [sunabozu]: *little puppy sneezez*
2008-05-08 [Araglas]: Awww its adorable!!!!!
2008-05-08 [sunabozu]: *barks*arf arf!
2008-05-08 [Araglas]: Awww!!! *huggles puppy*
2008-05-09 [Eloura]: *reappears*
2008-05-09 [sunabozu]: *curls up*
2008-05-09 [Eloura]: *pets*
2008-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Turkey's unbanned... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Damn... 'bout time... *randomly slaps Misty*... man, I missed doing that...
2008-05-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: 104 messages... over 1,000 wiki updates... 30 new diary notices... dang, I've got a lot to check...
2008-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: 104?! ...oh yeah... most of those were me, stupid... I was trying to get message number 66666666etc. something... go check your most recent messages, douche... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Crazy ho! ...and finish yo friggin' ACT thing... it's due today! ...*slaps you*... *eats yo ramen*...
2008-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Funk you, you piece o' shift... damage! ...I forgot to do that ACT thing! Bun of a sitch! ...be back later... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...riiiiight... *eats yo ramen*... while is there a giant noodle creature here...?
2008-05-10 [Eloura]: *eyes widen in aww of the great and almight turkey she keeps hearing about me* whoa
2008-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-05-10 [nokaredes]: [Eloura] you never met Turkey? o_O
2008-05-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Who the heck is Turkey...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-10 [Sunrose]: Gobblegobble..
2008-05-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! I think I'm offended, but I'm not sure...
2008-05-10 [Pillowthief]: Holy crap! Sunrose! (Is that Davir still annoyingly randomly commenting on Delete Sunrose Now!?)
2008-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi Sagacious Turkey.*hugs*
2008-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ick! *throws water at that Misty guy*... why won't you melt?!
2008-05-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cause I'm not allergic to water.
2008-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: You will be... *shakes fist*... *throws more water*...
2008-05-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?I like you,you are cool
2008-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes, I know... *continues throwing water*... say, are you allergic yet...?
2008-05-11 [Keir Devlin]: ...
PENIS
2008-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I believe you meant to say "penus"...
2008-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: What ever happened to the other non-devlin...?
2008-05-11 [Sunrose]: I think your dictionary killed him :P
2008-05-11 [nokaredes]: You gotta alter Misty's DNA to make her allergic to water... and I have just the machine for that right here! You see, it's a gun that fires not bullets, but a patented DNA Morph Beam© that alters the vic--er, I mean, subject's DNA! And of course, one of the dials on here makes the person allergic to the next substance they come into contact with. And it can be yours for four easy payments of $30 (USD)...!
2008-05-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: I dunno... $120 bucks for just a DNA morpher...? ...I'm pretty sure I can find one at the flea market for $20...
2008-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *a booming voices comes from nowhere* "Looking for low prices on DNA morphers?!" *suddenly the lights dim and dramatic music plays as all of a sudden, Mort leaps through the air doing impressive flips and stunts. Upon landing in the spotlight, however, he twists his ankle, falls backward, hits his head on a table, and dies*
2008-05-12 [Duke Devlin]: Mort's 'dictionary' did not kill me! D: I've been darn ill. ¬¬
Still am, hurts my eyes to look at this here damn screen. D:
Anywho.. So.. The Sagacious Turkey, who I never met, is back!? Woo. XD
Good for him.
Man I missed this place. D:


Hahaa. Death.


To Keir Devlin: Penis to you too darling. XD
2008-05-12 [Duke Devlin]: And OI Sunrose.. I am female. -____-
2008-05-12 [Motionless]: Yo.
2008-05-12 [Sunrose]: Delete me :P
2008-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Who's the 'yo'ing Motionless guy...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: I don't know, but he doesn't seem to be moving very much...
2008-05-13 [Eloura]: yes i don't know the sagacious turkey ... *sniffles*
2008-05-14 [Duke Devlin]: Damn lack of movement. D:
Yo back atcha foo'.
So.. I feel thoroughly unintroduced! D:
2008-05-14 [Imperator]: How dare you fools support Huckabee! Romney was totally the best. Too bad conservatives have to vote for McCain now...
2008-05-14 [Duke Devlin]: .... Oh god. -____-
Take you and your views silently to the bar.
2008-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Huckabee will make a comeback... you'll see! ...I don't care that he dropped out already! ...and for any further indroductioning for turkey, see past comments...
2008-05-14 [Duke Devlin]: Blah blah. We care not.
Oh.. And I dunno what you are on about.. SO I shall just go eat my babies. <3
2008-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats bacon bits*... your what now?
2008-05-14 [Duke Devlin]: Precisely... >_> <_< There was never any babies. *shoves corpses under table*
2008-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/1952872/Darth-Vader-spared-jail-for-lightsaber-attack.html
2008-05-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats babies*... bacon bits?! ...what's wrong with you?!
2008-05-15 [Duke Devlin]: They are my Bacon bit Babies, see? So, technically, you are all eating babies anyway. :)
Wtf. Thats BIZARRE. XD
2008-05-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn crazy ham lady... with your piglets...
2008-05-15 [Duke Devlin]: Ew no piglets here. >>
Bacon bits you get on weird salads and shit.
2008-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: So... no piglets...? ...dang... *throws away giant fork*... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-15 [Duke Devlin]: Shame huh? XD They are annoyingly squeely. Besides.. I must sleep now.., I have 5 and a half hours of exams on friday (two exams) and I really should sleep. -____-
2008-05-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Only five and a half? You loser. Why, I remember this time back in '63 when I had to take eleventy-six tests... it took me twenty-seven hours. Not only that, but I had to do it in a snowstorm too... I lost two toes, a finger, and an ear, but it was worth it when I passed that IQ test. I nearly made a perfect score too... a sweet 99.
2008-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa... a 99? ...nice. I only made a 60 on it. Hyuck. *eats ramen with his hands*
2008-05-15 [Duke Devlin]: XD I love you two. XD You remind me of The Mad Hatter and the March Hare. XD
2008-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: The magician once got so mad, he pulled his hare out... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-15 [Duke Devlin]: TRUE
2008-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: So's your face.
2008-05-15 [Duke Devlin]: As is yours, Mister. *old Londoner voice*
2008-05-16 [Pillowthief]: *eats actual ramen*


Wait, a min... This isnt real ramen! This is the cheap american knockoff of ramen! They included a frikkin' plastic fork in the box! Wtf?
2008-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: A free plastic fork too?! ...man, I gotta get some of that stuff.
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmmmmmmmmmmm...foooooooooork...*eats fork-flavored ramen*...
2008-05-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey peeps oh I got a 120 on an IQ test.
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: My ass you did. Who was the distributor of this alleged test?
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of ramen, whatever happened to [Araglas], [Fallen Child Athena], [Lethan], [Eloura], [sunabozu], and the occasional [nokaredes]...? You people are starting to get lazy with your commenting! ...you too Mist(er)... *eats ramen*... and where's that turkey guy?
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: I'm here just been busy :P
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks you in the back of the head*... where are those pictures of Spidey I asked for?!
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *bites* That was nok you told .. lol
2008-05-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *swings in wearing a Spiderman suit*... Mwahahaa! *steals the cash register and swings out the back door*
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Tell me you got that picture... please tell me you got that! ...*strangles Eloura*...
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *had taken photo from when turkey came in and hands over* there ya go
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: What is this crap?! ...where are the pictures of Batman I told you to get?! ...*smacks Eloura around*...
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *fights back and say's* You asked me for SPIDEY o.o
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Who the heck is Spidey?!! ...where are those pictures of Superman I asked for?! *stabs Eloura repeatedly*...
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *kills mortified penguin and say's* You told me Spidey!
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *is dead*... don't just stand there... bury me, stupid! ...and bring me those pictures of Iron Man I asked for!!
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *burys you ten thousand feets under the ground*
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Man, that's a lot of feets... now fetch those pictures of Bigfoot I keep telling you to get! *chokes on dirt*
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *laughs and watches from counter seeing you'll be busy a while*
2008-05-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in*... Yo, chief! I gots them pictures of Nessy you asked fo'! *throws random, out of focus pictures of seagulls on the desk*... I'll take $500 per shot. No less.
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *watches from counter*
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Man, these are some great shots of Goku! And only $700 each?! ...score! I'll take 'em all! *throws some pennies at you and burns the photos*
2008-05-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Heh heh... sucker... *eats the nickels*...
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *grows bored with pictures so burns a stole*
2008-05-18 [Duke Devlin]: Sucks to be you Misty, I got a 127 on one once.. Ages ago. XD BWAHA. >:)
I should really take a DECENT one though. >_>
*burns a Stole also*
Wait...
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: Acualy it was a stool
2008-05-18 [Pillowthief]: Bloody, or non-bloody?
Wait, what?
2008-05-18 [Duke Devlin]: I know.. I mispelled it on purpose. ;)
BLOODY. Definitely bloody.
:D
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: i also mispelled it
2008-05-18 [Duke Devlin]: No shit.
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: We all do :P
2008-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: No we don't... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: Yes we do :P
2008-05-18 [Duke Devlin]: No. No we don't.
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: *rolls eyes laughign*
2008-05-18 [Duke Devlin]: *laughs atcha*
2008-05-18 [Eloura]: EVI!
2008-05-18 [Duke Devlin]: Yes..., Evi... >_> <_<
2008-05-19 [sara(:]: dustin is a douche. :D


oh, and junior too.
2008-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn you, sore throat girl...
2008-05-19 [sara(:]: that was like two years ago.


i can't believe you still remember that
2008-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucker... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-19 [sara(:]: psh.
2008-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I think you're leaking air... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-19 [sara(:]: oh, sorry.
2008-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... of course... *hides pin*...
2008-05-19 [Keir Devlin]: ... YO
2008-05-19 [sara(:]: you're still a douche though.
2008-05-19 [Keir Devlin]: ... .______.
Uh...
2008-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Too many Devlins... *sets up Devlin traps*...
2008-05-19 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-05-19 [Pillowthief]: Thats too slow. Grabs antique shotgun off of mantle-piece and releases the dogs.


Yes, before sundown, those babies will have her treed. YEHAW!
2008-05-19 [Pedo pete]: Leaking air reminds me of enemas, and the burning need to visit a restroom. You guys are my absolute last page I visit, before the bathroom. -_-;; Oh woe is me and my social life.
2008-05-19 [Duke Devlin]: Pedo Pete, eh? XD Like it. ;)
And.. NO TRAPS! *avoids*
2008-05-20 [nokaredes]: You bitch! :O How dare you not talk to me! ...you'll never read this, will you? u_u
2008-05-20 [Duke Devlin]: Awhhh bless. D:
2008-05-20 [Pillowthief]: Traps? You forgot about the dogs!


*Dogs bite Non-Devlin for 2d6+3!*
2008-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *is working on Charlie Brown: Smokin' Deuces*... I'm gettin' tired of all this here uploadin'...
2008-05-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Why is there no comments for today or the 21st?! ...*stabs Misty*...
2008-05-23 [sunabozu]: *little puppy wakes up and starts writing on a not book*arf!....*hold the notbook up it says " Milk"* arf!
2008-05-23 [Duke Devlin]: *is bitten*
I am ASHAMED of you guys! I've been gone since Tuesday, and only four comments have been made?!
Disgraceful. ¬¬ You need help people.
2008-05-23 [sunabozu]: *holds up the note book with little puppy arms*
2008-05-23 [Duke Devlin]: ... Good for you Suna. ;)
2008-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks off and deep-fries little puppy arms*
2008-05-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...mmm... puppy legs...
2008-05-23 [Duke Devlin]: *eatin' bacon* ..... *for free*
2008-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Where the heck is everbody at?! ...you jerks are killing the comments here...
2008-05-24 [Araglas]: *runs in* Sorry!!!! I ws out searching for the blood orchid!
2008-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Not a good enough excuse! ...*flamethrowers you*...
2008-05-24 [Araglas]: *dies a horrible flaming death* But it was to grow illegal giant anaconda's!!!!!
2008-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What's this?! ...and orchid doing illegal business?! ...*arrests the flower*... you're going away for a long time, buddy... *the flower grows slightly*... you just earned yourself another five years!! ...*throws the flower in a cell*...
2008-05-24 [Araglas]: Nooo!!! *is zombie* I need it!! That flower will help me breed and army of indestructable anacondas!!!
2008-05-24 [nokaredes]: I went camping and caught me a turtle ^_^
2008-05-24 [Araglas]: Aww cute!!!
2008-05-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks over to Sunabozu in his puppy form and heals his arms then holds him*
2008-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I went campin' and ate me a turtle... then I used it's shell for a soup bowl.
2008-05-26 [Sunrose]:   
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! ...that thing is freaky...
2008-05-26 [Sunrose]: *giggles*
2008-05-26 [Araglas]: *dies*
2008-05-26 [sunabozu]: *little puppy dies*
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...why is nobody on Elftown anymore...? *gets gun off the wall*
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I think I'll major in whore-ticulture... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-26 [Sunrose]: I'm here..sort of :P
What culture??
2008-05-26 [Araglas]: *does dead zombie dance*
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: That dance looks a lot like the macarena...
2008-05-26 [Araglas]: *is dead and cant talk*
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *jabs you with a sharp stick*
2008-05-26 [Araglas]: *falls over*
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *writes "Food" on your forehead and tosses you in the freezer*
2008-05-26 [Araglas]: *walks in diner* Has anyone seen my clone?
2008-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I thought I threw you in the ******* freeze- I mean... nope. Haven't seen it... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-26 [Araglas]: *sighs* I can't find him anywhere.....
2008-05-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I know what you mean... *pats your back*... *indiscreetly puts a "raw meat, please chop" sign on your back*... Oh, by the way... someone wanted you in the kitchen... I think it was important...
2008-05-27 [Araglas]: *walks into kitchen and dies* *runs* Guys!! Dang, none of he clones are to be gfound!
2008-05-27 [Eloura]: *runs in wearing a graduation gown and say's* Sorry i've been gone so long been busy getting ready to graduate High School
2008-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Why has Elftown suddenly become so innactive...? ...*eats ramen*... *blames Sunrose*...
2008-05-28 [Sunrose]: I'm dead, you can't blame me...
2008-05-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *blames Sunrose anyway*... *stabs misty*...
2008-05-29 [Eloura]: cause it's busy time for some :P
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Only 39 comments!? WTF is happening to this place? oO
I've been gone like... 6 days or something shit.. And here you all are.. NOT commenting!
*angry*
*joins Morts disgust*
2008-05-30 [sunabozu]: CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD CHAD BIRD!!!!
2008-05-30 [Sunrose]: Sigmund..
2008-05-30 [sunabozu]: CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! 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IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME!CHAD BIRD IS AWESOME THATS ME! IS AWESOME! he's such a psyco
2008-05-30 [Eloura]: Wow >.>
2008-05-30 [sunabozu]: How does that grab your snatch!!!?
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Ewwwww.
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: XD
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: That makes me homocidal... *kills puppies*... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: It's annoying to look at! D: QUICK! Drive it off the page!
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...blah!
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*!
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: QUICKLY PAGE!
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: LOADING LOAD.
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: O
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: H
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: M
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Y
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: G
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: O
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: D
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: G
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: O
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: A
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: W
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: AY! :D
All gone. ^^
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...nice... *celebrates with a bowl of ramen*...
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, if we can just get all of the MIA people to get back here...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: *already consuming the western-substitute-noodles*
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: *in a celebratory manner*
2008-05-30 [Eloura]: I'm here also graduating high school in 2 hours!
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Good for you. ;)
2008-05-30 [Eloura]: *grins* Yeps!
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: :)
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Am I like... one of the youngest people here or something...? Everybody's already graduating apparently...
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: 'cept Devlin of course...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Naturally. ;) Being 17, I am in my first year of college, and have a while before 'graduation'. :)
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm taking summer classes, which count for college...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh cool. :O What do you do in them?
Are you really 17? I have a vague recollection of your house once saying 20, or something.
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I tend to claim I'm over 18, but that's just so I can get into dirty wikis... I'm actually 17 though and only slightly older than both you and Turkey...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: I noticed! You are just under a month older than myself. Turkey, I don't know.
I do the same thing to get into wikis and websites. XD Not the smutty kind, btw. XD Just random ones that demand that everyone is over 18. -___-
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You're twenty days older than Turkey... *eats ramen*...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Wow. oO Now that's unexpected, and I'm not entirely sure why. oO
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...me either. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Oh well.. *eatin' bacon*
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Your children?!
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Nah, actualy bacon. The kids have all grow'd up now! *teary eyes*
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: "Everything that can be invented has been invented." -Charles H. Duell, U.S. commissioner of patents, 1899
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: "We don't like their sound. Groups of guitars are on the way out." -Decca Records, rejecting the Beatles, 1962
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: "Stocks have reached what looks like a permanently high plateau." -Irving Fisher, proffesor of economics, Yale University, October 17, 1929
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: HA! I have frequently had that very thought (Charles H. Duell one), but I am sure we can invent something new. XD It's just that our minds can't work their way around the concepts. ;)
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... stupid Economy book...
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lRTTFKWhEmA
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: You know I went to fave that. oO Why do I fave everything you link? D: *doesn't fave as its weird*
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucker...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: That was a waste of my life! *demands it back* ... *forcefully*
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You got a problem with the Republican Space Rangers?!
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: Ofcourse I do! *loud, abrasive*
2008-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh... okay then...
2008-05-30 [Duke Devlin]: XD That was so meek. :( I am upset. -___-
2008-05-31 [Eloura]: I'm not even 18 yeteither ^^'
2008-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'll be 18 in November,but yeah.
2008-05-31 [Eloura]: wow i thought mort though.. i really thought was older weird...
2008-06-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh?
2008-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2008-06-01 [Araglas]: *walks in* Hi!
2008-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Zombie!! ...*shoots Araglas 87 times in the face*... woops... sorry... force of habit...
2008-06-01 [Araglas]: *dies*


*walks in and sees clone* There you are!!! Why do you guys keep dying!!!
2008-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at two signs on the wall that look exactly the same and both say, "No exact copies and/or clones!"*... *eats two bowls of similar ramen*...
2008-06-01 [Araglas]: *ssweat drops* Oh...I see..hehe...*runs away*
2008-06-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets gun off the wall*... *shoots Nok*... What ever happened to the Chickens...?
2008-06-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Don't know.
2008-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Why not?!
2008-06-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: maybe they went to KFC and never came back.
2008-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: No... they always come back... and sometimes with potatoes...
2008-06-02 [Araglas]: lol *dances in circle*
2008-06-02 [sunabozu]: *little puppy writes on a not book and holds it up, the note book reads" SNATCH"*
2008-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *some guy named Snatch dies outside of a heart attack*... what kind of notebook did you say that was?!
2008-06-02 [Araglas]: *does snatch heart dance*
2008-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: What?!
2008-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'm bored... I'm going to join the maffia... if I don't come back, feel free to assume the worst.
2008-06-03 [Araglas]: I dont think we will assume, We will be eating your body! ^_^ I have a contract with the maffia.
2008-06-03 [nokaredes]: Which mafia...?
2008-06-03 [Araglas]: Yakuza, Irish, Russian, umm thats it though, they keep me a healthy supply of bodies, so I can make my zombie food ^^


((I dont really, this is just make-believe, thought Id just say that))
2008-06-03 [sunabozu]: AHH! RUSSIAN ZOMBIE MAFIA!!!!!
2008-06-03 [Araglas]: *looks around* Nope...they aren't here
2008-06-03 [sunabozu]: jhgkgfkjghkjgkjhgjkhiuhbiugouhgolihlijhiuhopiy7gtoijoiythjijnohguyluhg hbohbyl hlijhouuhoijn holhglkl hbiijhoijoij hikkkkjlkjnlkjijnpjin ikjnlnljnl[[ppppkjhbkjhb kjhbkuhuhbkj kghvb lkjhbljkhbkyhhjjhhjhjkjhnb
2008-06-03 [Araglas]: ........?????
2008-06-03 [sunabozu]: *turns into a little puppy*
2008-06-03 [Mrs. No_One]: What a cute puppy.
2008-06-03 [Araglas]: *laughs and starts to make zombie burgers in the kitchen* Any request on food?
2008-06-03 [Mrs. No_One]: I wouldn't mind a zombie burger.
2008-06-04 [Araglas]: Of course!! One Zombie Burger coming right up!!


*sizzling meat can be heard, and chopping*


So how has your day been going?
2008-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I missed alot,may I have a Zombie Burger?
2008-06-05 [Araglas]: Sure!! *a zombie was passed from the kitchen to Misty-chan) there you go, hot off the grill!
2008-06-05 [sunabozu]: *little puppy scampers around*
2008-06-05 [nokaredes]: The power is out here. It stinks! Mostly because that means the air conditioning doesn't work...
2008-06-05 [Araglas]: Ew. That sucks, Zombie burger?
2008-06-05 [nokaredes]: ...can't be grosser than what all is in my 'fridge right now... sure! :D
2008-06-05 [Araglas]: ^_^


*sizzling is heard and then* Hey get back here!! I need your leg!!!! *bangs and scraps followed by a thunk* GOTCHA!!!!! *more sizzling then* Done!! *walks out with a Zombie burger* Here you are!
2008-06-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Thanks.*picks up the puppy*Are you hungry,do you want some?
2008-06-09 [weasel2]: bark bark bark
2008-06-09 [nokaredes]: No comments? o_O There was a time when there were so many comments when I came back from a multiple-day absence that I wouldn't even bother reading them... good times... good times...
2008-06-09 [weasel2]: bark bark bark
2008-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I was gone for a week... why is there hardly any comments?!! ...darn it... I need to invite some new members...
2008-06-09 [Araglas]: *is cooking* What will you have puppy?
2008-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and more puppies?!
2008-06-09 [sara(:]: ...
2008-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You did not just triple dot me.
2008-06-09 [Araglas]: ...
2008-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh **** no. *reaches for gun on the wall, but nothing is there*... who stole my gun?!
2008-06-10 [Araglas]: *kicks overn shut* .....
2008-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks down the door*... hey! Who knocked my door down?! ...*slaps Nokaredes*... well... I'm off to find some new members for this crap shack... then it's back to the maffia...
2008-06-10 [Araglas]: ...*makes more food*
2008-06-10 [Blonka]: ermm..Mortified told me to post a comment here o.O; so...here it is: i would like a lunch special umm..#27 :]
2008-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What do you think this is?! ...some sort of restuarant?! ...**** no! *smacks you*... *eats ramen*... oh wait... someone go get that #27...
2008-06-10 [Araglas]: *comes out of kitchen with a fried Yo Momma and a side of fries* Order up!
2008-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo momma is hot and greasy... eat up!
2008-06-10 [Nekko fox]: I noticed Cooked sushi is up there twice >_>. Note: I voted for you Mort. Hope you enjoy the btetr paycheck.
2008-06-10 [Araglas]: *huggles Nekko Fox* Hey!! Want a Zombie Burger? They are fresh off the grill! ^_^
2008-06-10 [Nekko fox]: Nah, but I'll take a pint of blood.
2008-06-10 [Araglas]: Sure! *makes way to cooling area, and pulls a few bags of blood from a fridge* What type and kind...
2008-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Araglas... do you have a license to serve zombie? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-06-10 [Araglas]: I do! I just got it renewed! I am fully liscned to serve Zombie in every country in or out of this world. And alternate deminsions to!
2008-06-10 [nokaredes]: Probably not all the alternate dimensions... 'cause there have to be some where you never got into zombie cuisine at all... that's just how they work...
2008-06-10 [Blonka]: o.< ..*pokes the yo mama* ...ehh..*twitch*
2008-06-10 [sunabozu]: *turns into 100 puppies*
2008-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I got this from a website,none of it is true,except 2,6,and 10.


1.Misty was banned from Finland because of not wearing pants.
2.Contrary to popular belief, Misty is not successful at sobering up a drunk person, and in many cases she may actually increase the adverse effects of alcohol.
3.Devoid of her cells and proteins, Misty has the same chemical makeup as sea water.
4.Misty can live for up to a week without a head!
5.Misty can last longer without water than a camel can.
6.Three seagulls flying overhead are a warning that Misty is near.
7.Twenty-eight percent of Microsoft's employees are Misty.
8.It takes 17 muscles to smile, and 43 to frown at Misty!
9.All the moons of the Solar System are named after characters from Greek and Roman mythology, except the moons of Uranus, which are named after Misty!
10.Misty will often rub up against people to lay her scent and mark her territory.
2008-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: And since my real name is Mary,Again none are true.


1.Mary can jump up to sixteen times her own height.
2.The risk of being struck by Mary is one occurence every 9,300 years.
3.Only fifty-five percent of men wash their hands after using Mary!
4.Louisa May Alcott, author of 'Little Mary', hated Mary and only wrote the book at her publisher's request!
5.The first toy product ever advertised on television was Mr Mary Head!
6.Mary has a memory span of three seconds.
7.Until the 1960s, Mary was not allowed to enter Disneyland.
8.Mary can taste with her feet!
9.Mary can run sixty-five kilometres an hour - that's really fast.
10.If a snake is born with two heads, the heads will fight over who gets Mary.
2008-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's rediculous! ...only 16 times your own height...? ...weakling... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-05 [Duke Devlin]: Ha! Why Mort here can jump five times that! *cough, wink, nudge*
2008-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe 300 comments have mysteriously dissapeared...
2008-07-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: ALL THOSE MOTHER ******* COMMENTS!! ...*stabs Misty*... more importantly though, [Hedda] is using one of my mood images! Score!
2008-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Those moods suck! ...*eats ramen*... those comments better be restored... or Misty gets it!
2008-07-05 [Duke Devlin]: Acetasmic! :D
Also.. I miss my diary entry, the comments, and such. D:
2008-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... We need some more ho's in here...
2008-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: H2O? Water you talking about?!
2008-07-06 [Eloura]: RAR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: People speak!!!!
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude... so this chick was waving at me, but then she got closer and said, "Sorry... I thought you were someone else."... and I said, "I am!"... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: not a dude :P but nice!
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Pillow Fight Rules:
Dude vs. Chick - Cool
Dude vs. Dude - Gay
Chick vs. Chick - Awesome
Dude vs. Pillow - Crazy
Pillow vs. Pillow - Crazy Awesome
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *blinks and picks up a pillow throwing it at you*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Think about it... hot potato is a very different game when you're poor... it's more like "My potato! My fingers are burning, but who cares... free potato!"...
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *beats Eloura with a pillow case filled with bricks and shards of glass*
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *giggles and nods laughing and dies rebirthing*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *pillow breaks away and starts attacking at random*... NOOOO!! ...*shields himself with Misty*...
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *laughs at the pillow eating mortified Penguin*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Hitler comes flying through the window*... "Zorry vor boddering jou."... *he leaps out the other window*... Darn Civil War reenactments! *shakes fist*
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *laughs very hard* Lol very nice!!!! WHOOT THAT ROCKS!!!
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks Eloura*... WHAT DID I TELL YOU ABOUT USING THOSE EYEBALLS?!! ...when you look at stuff... everything else gets jealous! ...now go apologize to everything! ...*eats ramen*... now where's that damned pizza boy...? He's late!
2008-07-07 [Ashoka Virlym]: -laughs- you got that off of that SHOW!
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *laughs very hard and throws a knife at mortified penguin and apologizes to no one* The pizza go was hear tswo hours ago
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Flapjack?!
2008-07-07 [Ashoka Virlym]: yes...The Marvelous Misadventures of Flapjack..I saw that one too and Flapjack covers his eyes and starts saying sorry to everything..hehe..
2008-07-07 [Ashoka Virlym]: well i have to get going....sorry for leaving..but i was watching the pillow fight? i guess... talk to you later...
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: YES!!!!!! NEVER!!!
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pizza boy bursts in through the window*... Pizza! *he hurls it at some random child*... sweet! ...*opens pizza*... hey! I said I wanted a veggie pizza! ...this is a leggie pizza! *holds up human leg*... *shrugs*... *eats leg*...
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, the Captain K'nuckles... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *laughs and kills the pizza guy turnig him intofood*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Nooo! Pizza boy! What will I tell his pizza wife?! ...what about his seven pizza children?! ...and what of his sick old pizza mother?! ...didn't you think of the consequences?! ...*sobs*... *eats Pizza Boy*... mmm... pepperoni...
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: *laughs a you s easily forget pizza boy and his family while nibbleing on a cookie*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Where'd you get that cookie?!
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: I brought it from home!!!
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I could have sworn I burnt your house down... then... I wonder whose house I did burn...
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: Your burned down Nok's with nok in it
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah... gooood times...
2008-07-07 [Fearathress]: good god.
2008-07-07 [nokaredes]: Hey! Why are people other than Mortimer and Turkey insulting me while I'm away?!
2008-07-07 [Fearathress]: Huh? *ish tottaly innocent*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: It's Nok! ...*dives out the window*...
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: If I ever saw an amputee being hanged, I'd start shouting out letters... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-07 [Fearathress]: ..... okay.....
2008-07-07 [Eloura]: WHOOT!! I AM GOOD!!!
2008-07-07 [Duke Devlin]: There is far too little pillow fights occurring in this room! *launches pillows with cannon, at El and Mort*
2008-07-07 [Fearathress]: *builds a pillow fortress before joining in on the pillow fight.*
2008-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *four more Morts (that sounds funny) burst in*... *all five Morts combine to form the MegaMort*... *MegaMort launches pillows/orphans out of a cannon*...
2008-07-07 [Duke Devlin]: AHH! THE ORPHANS ARE COMING! D: *ducks and rolls behind the bar*
2008-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly, a fat orphan clogs up port seven*... *MegaMort explodes*...
2008-07-08 [Motionless]: Oh dear. *shakes head*
2008-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: I HATE THE ELFTOWN CHANGES!
2008-07-08 [Fearathress]: It's not all that bad.
2008-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: The Elftown changes hate you too, Misty... *points at the random wiki button and the stylesheet who are laughing at Misty*...
2008-07-08 [Duke Devlin]: XD Man, Misty. There is no need to 'shout' at us. We couldn't care less how you feel about the Elftown changes. In fact, there are very few of them. And none of them are really an inconvenience - excluding of course, the missing diaries and comments.
2008-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: And that the things mixed up,the wiki thing comes before the online friends,last logins,and the thing that tells you about the changes and coments in wikis it's just confusing.
2008-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I would prefer the "watch this wiki" button still be at the bottom...
2008-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah that would be prefered,but all of this is just new so it's confusing to me,and alot of other people don't like that their diary entries have been deleted.
2008-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: It's new, but it's not confusing... and screw everyone's diary entries... I'm only concerned that B's D lost so many comments... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah alot of other wikis have too and it is annoying
2008-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Do you know how many "*stabs misty*" comments got deleted?! ...now I have to redo all those stabbings! ...*stabs Misty*... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not sure.
2008-07-09 [nokaredes]: Also, my stylesheet doesn't work! I hate this colour green! When will my grey be back?! *runs away sobbing*
2008-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I've always used the green anyway! ...*eats ramen*... gool ol' green... *slaps grey*...
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Nice... [Hedda] added my "last visited" idea.
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: cools
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What did you say about my mom?! ...*slaps Nok*...
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: *gigges*
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you gigge at me!
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: Giggles sir giggles
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck does this "giggle" mean?
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: It's like laughter
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, you left the 's' off the beginning...
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: i did? lol sorry i thoughti left off the l *falls asleep*
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: You're boring. I'm going to chuck big rocks off an overpass at the cars below...
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: *wakes up* I WANNA CHUCK ROCKS OFF AN OVERPASS!!!!
2008-07-10 [Duke Devlin]: No! *slaps*
2008-07-10 [Araglas]:   
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: *slaps back* Well you know what!! RAR!!!
2008-07-10 [Duke Devlin]: Rar back atcha, small fry! :O
:D
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: I'm notta small fry!!! *laughs*
2008-07-10 [Araglas]:
RAWR
2008-07-10 [Duke Devlin]: Yes you are! *threatens*
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out a gun*... what's that, sweetness? Huh? What's that you say? A real rain is going to come and wash the scum off the streets? ...I agree... *glares at random people*... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-10 [Duke Devlin]: Quite right.. *to the non-inconspicuous guy in the middle of the room*
2008-07-10 [Eloura]:
GRRRRRRRRRR
I AM NOT A SMALL FRY!
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa! Who said that?! ...*shoots the inconspicuous guy in the corner*...
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... small fries...
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: *laughs crazily*
2008-07-10 [Araglas]:
MOOOOOO
2008-07-10 [Eloura]: 
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn huge html... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-10 [Araglas]: *eats ramen as well*
2008-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Like I said in the missing 300+ comments... we need some new members here... I beleive I then went on a long rant about how the previous administrations (Turk, Pixie, and Nok) have brought Bob's Diner down. I also stated that the Ramen Party is failing... so... go get some members, people! I already did once, but it was deleted and I'm too lazy to do it again...
2008-07-11 [Eloura]: ermmm but what if no one wants to?
2008-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Then I'll... uh... *holds Nok hostage*... I'll do it! I'll shoot!
2008-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: There seems to be an imperator working here now. Perhaps he would like to join in the Elftown takeover... *eats ramen*... *is still holding Nok hostage*...
2008-07-11 [Imperator]: Not until you remove Huckabee and replace it with - THE IMPERATOR!!!
2008-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: But... Huckabee is supported by Chuck Norris!
2008-07-11 [Imperator]: Don't make me destroy you...
2008-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: It's totally worth it... *eats ramen*... *Chuck Norris bursts in, trips on an incoveniently placed cow, and crashes out the back door*...
2008-07-11 [Imperator]: *on his way out Chuck Norris accidentaly caught the Huckabee banner on his foot and ripped down*


Hmmmmm. You seem to have a very empty spot on your wall. A nice "Bob's Diner for [Imperator]!" would fit nicely there...
2008-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, but what are you gonna do... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-11 [Imperator]: Win. What else? Foo'.
2008-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*is still holding Nok hostage!*... oh, forget it... *shoots Nok*...
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and there goes another bunch of comments... dang it! *kicks Misty in the balls*
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Repost: "Grawwwwwr!"
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: That's technically the third official Paul Doyle comment... *documents this*...
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I just watched Hellboy 2... pretty sweet... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-12 [Sunrose]: Damn crashes! *shakes fist*
As I was writing; I see the troll has got a new champion! *cough*hypocrite*cough* :D
2008-07-12 [Duke Devlin]: Woah! :O
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Wow, who farted . . . *goes off to find some Lysol*
2008-07-12 [Imperator]: New champion? *eats ramen* Oh god this stuff is disgusting!! *spits out ramen*
2008-07-12 [Duke Devlin]: Blasphemy! *shuns*
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I know... ramen sucks... *eats pizza*...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Well, when tough times lead to tough measures (or tough posturing?) one can learn to appreciate the delicacy that is the humble brick of instant ramen noodles.


Hmmm . . . so I'm a Champion of Trolls. so be it. Times change, personal ET commitment and involvement change, and frankly I don't give a damn anymore. Hypocrisy? *shrugs* Oh well! Some of us had further to fall than others, it would seem, and so this could lead to lingering bitterness. After all, you don't just re-mount a toppled statue that's fallen and shattered to pieces. Like a toddler, I didn't have very far to fall. So I got back up with nothing worse than boo-boos on my knees and elbows, I scampered along, and I adapted. Deblocking people like Mort and starting fresh and anew *shrugs*.


Anyway, rather than being "Champion of Trolls II" I'll officially join this wiki and give myself a better, sequel-ish kind of title. (Barring an unlikely ET crash, of course . . . )
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Must I always be referred to as a troll? I much prefer ogre...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: The Prodigal Son II: Electric Boogaloo !!!!


*cheesy 1980's synth-rap breakdancing music*
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Ogre! Ogre! Mort is a ramen-loving ogre!
________________


Ogre Battle Lyrics
Artist(Band):Queen


Words and music by Freddie Mercury


Now once upon a time
An old man told me a fable
When the piper is gone
And the soup is cold on your table
And if the black crow flies
To find a new destination
That is the sign


Come tonight
Come to the ogre site
Come to the ogre battle fight


He gives a great big cry
And he can swallow up the ocean
With a mighty tongue he catches flies
And the palm of his hand incredible size
One great big eye has a focus in your direction
Now the battle is on
Yeah yeah yeah!


Come tonight
Come to the ogre sight
Come to the ogre battle fight


Ah ah ah ah ah
The ogre men are still inside
The two way mirror mountain
Gotta keep down
Right out of sight
You can't see in but they can see out
Keep a look out
The ogre men are coming out
From the two way mirror mountain
They're running up behind
And they're coming all about
Can't go east 'cause you gotta go south


Ogre men are going home
The great big fight is over
Bugle blow that trumpet cry
Ogre battle lives for ever more
You can come along
You can come along
Come to ogre battle
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't recall us buying a 1980's style DJ... I did buy a 90's one though... *points at Nok*... she never does her job though...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: A pity . . . whassamatta, Nok? Get a durag and bling, and get it in gear!!!!
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, Nok! ...*smacks Misty*... hey, where is that Misty guy anyway...?
2008-07-12 [Sunrose]: Heh I did not fall nor am I bitter about retiring, I just think you're a moron who does the exact things he claims to despise :D
2008-07-12 [Ashoka Virlym]: -walks in- ello
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: As long as he brings comments into B's D, it's cool with me... and for some reason, I actually do have a durag and some bling right beside me...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Misty is a guy? Wasn't Misty featured on a late-night 1-900 TV ad that was broadcast between Ronco infomercials?


*saxophones* *breathless "sexy' voice* "Call now . . . I'm WAITING!" *facial expression resembling a dog smacked upside the face with a two-by-four*
2008-07-12 [Sunrose]: Of course, I'm just having a good laugh here :P
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: ha ha
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Hi [Ashoka Virlym] :-)
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]:    See? Here's that bling and durag... just don't ask why it's on Ackbar...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: IT'S A TRAP!!!!
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Maybe he could wear a very small feathered pink hat.
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah... Luke's wearing it right now...
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]:    Unfortunetly, it turns out Ackbar was an illegal alien and potential terrorist, so he was detained by the U.S. army and sent to Guantanamo Bay...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Throw in Destro, and my flashback to my 1980s childhood is complete :P
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]:    Luckily, Ackbar managed to kill the soldiers (and Krillin for some reason) with the help of his old friend, Ryuk.
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright... that's it... no more stupid cell phone pictures... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]:    Then, the Witch King, Godzilla, Skeletor, and a random ninja got together and formed an evil alliance. Suddenly, a Colossus arrived and attacked Wargreymon! At that point, Ed, Rock Lee, and Waldo (who had recently come out of hiding) showed up to battle the colossus as well as the new Legion of Doom!
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...okay... now I'm done. *dismantles the phone*
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: I always wondered what Waldo was doing while he was hiding . . .
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: And I always wondered what would happen if Waldo and Carmen Sandiego had a kid together... they'd never be able to find that poor kid...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Waldo + Carmen Sandiego having a kid? Who was that villain-sidekick from second-season Digimon? Myotismon, I think? (I used to watch this for the creatures alone, before I started doing artwork, and before I realized I was part of the furry fandom for better or worse.)
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: It was probably Myotismon... or some form of his at least... I don't remember...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Mummymon, I meant.
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah... that weird guy that always hung out with the spider lady?
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: That guy, yep. Most of the villains looked hopelessly dorky, but digi-dudes like WarGreymon, Flamedramon and Exveemon were a lot cooler. And most of the third-season creatures, too.
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I only watched the first season, most of the second season, and half of the third season. After that, it started to suck. Stingmon and Blackwargreymon were cool...
2008-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: I stopped watching after the third. What little I saw of the fourth season was beyond appalling.
2008-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't remember why I was never able to finish watching the third, but I tried to watch some of the fourth... it just sucked. Now, I don't even have the channel, so I haven't seen any of the fifth...
2008-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]:    "Hi! I'm Beethoven! What?! Who's that! My God... it's my old arch nemesis... Mozart!"


You can only blame yourselves for me making these annoying things... if you would all just comment more...
2008-07-13 [Paul Doyle]: I had to work. A bit of overtime, too, being the good supervisor I am :P


Speaking of Ludwig Van . . . Mort, are you familiar with A Clockwork Orange, either the novel or (more likely) the Stanley Kubrick film that starred Malcolm McDowell before he got stuck in the B-movie rut?
2008-07-13 [Paul Doyle]: Before:





and After!



2008-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I've heard of it, yes.
2008-07-13 [Duke Devlin]: SHE IS HOOOME. :D
2008-07-14 [nokaredes]: But that's what the internet is for! That's where I've seen two-third of my anime!
2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Only two thirds?! *smacks Beethoven*
2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm offended that when I google search my username on here, the first wiki that it shows is What is an asshole?...
2008-07-14 [Paul Doyle]: So, Nok has seen two-thirds of all anime "A Clockwork Orange" style? Like this?


  



*is confuzzled*


2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: They should totally use that treatment on all criminals nowadays...
2008-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's a Paul! And where'd that imperator go?
2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know... I think he's still here somewhere... check the dumpster... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nope... hey! Where'd that giant "Bob's Diner for Imperator Alexander" sign come from?!
2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! I told those seagulls not to put that up! *stabs a random seagull flying by*
2008-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: You told that to the pigeons, stupid!
2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Sh*t! *buries the seagull's corpse out back next to pillowthief's*
2008-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: So that's where Pillowthief went...
2008-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... most of him. ...*points at the dumpster*... there's still a leg or two in there...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats disgustingly cooked ramen which had been sent from Maryland three years before*...
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Dude... I still have some of that on my shelf.
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Sh*t! Why didn't you ever use the rest of that calorie-dense ramen?
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Too lazy to cook it?
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: I lost like six pounds recently because I'm too lazy to eat!
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I gained like that much!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sweet! Did you ever order the extra cheesy pizza I told you to get?!
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, there were too many toppings to actually see the cheese!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! You should have just got an extra cheesy one... otherwise, you can't truly appreciate the cheese! *smacks Nok*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I ordered extra cheese with it, too! It was like Nirvana for my mouth and WWII for my heart!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: You still have that same old heart...? I keep telling you that you need to upgrade... get one of those gorilla hearts off the black- I mean, African American market...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I got something better! Whole body transplants! All you need to do is clone yourself!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: What do the clones think of all this?
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: They have no thoughts. They will have a deactivated cortex. Even if they do manage to think, they will be denied all rights... totalitarianism's a b*tch, ain't it?...
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nice! Now I can finally deny my clone his rights... it's about time too... I hate that ugly bastard... *kicks clone in the testicles*...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: They will be considered second-class citizens... until, of course, some righteous do-gooders become concerned about their rights... then, it's all down-hill from there...
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Just like what happened with those darned Native Americans...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Aren't you part Native American?!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: S-shut up, man! Now they know! ...AAAAAHH! *is carried away by government officials*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucker... Where's my money?!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: In yo' back account, douche!
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Not my back account! Ever since it emancipated itself, it's been giving me nothing but trouble!... *slaps back*... Take that, back!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: I know! That's one weird back, man... *eats yo ramen*...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: T-there's still a chance that hurricane Bertha may hit us, y-yeah!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Bertha's not man enough to take me on...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Peace out!
2008-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Screw you, ho!
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: It was Harrison Ford's birthday yesterday!
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: There... maybe someone will actually enter a contest of mine for once...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Gas prices are so high these days... It cost me 100 bucks to fill up my tank!


  

2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: XD
Sure I'll enter. XD Can't you give specifics though? :P As in.. Is an actual drawing-edit required? ..... *stares atcha blankly* .__.
2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: OH! And wow that was cheesy. XD
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Nothing is required! That's the beauty of it! ...and... also the crippling fault of it...
2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: Well that's cool. XD Now, on that note.. I add - humour necessary? :P
Everything of yours has a crippling fault, Mort. ;)
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope!
Only my organs... and my insurance business...
2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: Excellent. >=D
Ahh true.. *shakes head pityingly* All organs? Even the.. *cough* vital ones? >=)
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I've got a few extra ones of those... just in case...
2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: Oh that's all good then. ;)
2008-07-15 [Sunrose]: What's on the menu today? I'm hungry...
2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: Bacon bit babies! Get 'em while their fresh! *random vendor*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Hi, little kids! Would you like to buy some government secrets?
2008-07-15 [Duke Devlin]: Hellz yeah! *dances and flails arms*
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: Government secrets? What kind? And how many?
2008-07-15 [Lothuriel]: This place isn't so bad...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in and eat Lothuriel*
2008-07-15 [Lothuriel]: I don't taste very good!!! *screams and runs*
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: *beats lions with ugly stick*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, they'll do that... now where was I... government secrets! ...I got launch codes half price today! ...Learn the identity of one FBI agent, get one free! ...Get up to 10% on alien information with a coupon!
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! You took that ugly stick off the ugly tree out back!
2008-07-15 [Lothuriel]: What about the CIA? 
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: If you have a discount card I can take up to 20% off on CIA names...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *pets the ugly tree*... it's gonna be ooookay, little tree... it's knot going to happen again...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *solicites children on the streets*... hey, little boy! Wanna buy some poison?! How about some insurance?! *is attacked by an angry mother*
2008-07-15 [Lothuriel]: *slips you a discount card and a briefcase full of ramen noodles*
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: *has a giant truck fool of ramen noodles and a discount card*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... truck noodles...
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: I wish all your information for all the noodles...
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *hotwires the ramen truck and drives away*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
  

19:12:05 Hedda: Hi! It's me! ...the real Hedda!
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: WOW! The real Hedda? Cool! Want a Zombie Burger?
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, hello definitely real and unquestionable Hedda!
  

19:18:32 Hedda: ...I beat children! That's right! Feel free to quote me!
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: Um...ok I am not so sure your the real hedda, I click your name and it send me to some weird page.....
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: What's this?! A fake Hedda?!
  

19:21:59 Hedda: ...No it didn't! Stop lying! Why do you lie so much?!
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: Yes it did....I don' think your the real Hedda...and Unless proven otherwise I refuse to accept it...*eats Zombie burger*
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, that Hedda... *chuckles*... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-15 [Sunrose]: First have to learn to actually write like Hedda :P
2008-07-15 [Araglas]: lol
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh...
  

20:27:39 Sunrose: I'm just kidding! That was a perfect hedda!
2008-07-15 [Araglas]:   
2008-07-15 [Paul Doyle]: Wow, this is as cheesy as growing up in the 1980s watching "Knight Rider": Michael Knight and KITT versus Garth and KARR. That is, David Hasselhoff vs. David Hasselhoff.(Trying not to notice the line down the center of the TV screen.)


  

2008-07-15 [Sunrose]: And have to learn to write like me too :P
2008-07-15 [Hedda]: [Mortified Penguin]: Your Hedda should fix the layout-bugg with the annoying hole in the right border just before his comments!   
2008-07-15 [Hedda]: And now he has to fix the [] around his username too.   
2008-07-15 [Mortified Penguin]: It looked fine in Firefox, but it messed up in IE for some reason...
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I forgot what movie I recently saw David Hasselhoff in... he was wearing a shirt that said "Don't Hassle the Hoff"...
2008-07-16 [Eloura]: I Just saw Hell Boy II the other night *smiles* Loved it!!
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I saw that on Friday... of course, it would have helped if I had seen the first one... "Indestrible my ass!"...
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn illiterate demons... you'd think the son of Satan would get some good schooling, but no...
2008-07-16 [Eloura]: *laughs* I saw it friday also for my birthday lol ^^' I saw the first one it was awesome!! *smiles* So was the second one!!!
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Then there's that X-Files movie... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: 666 page versions, man!
2008-07-16 [nokaredes]: How do you make a wiki show up instead of a username?
2008-07-16 [Imperator]: Why on Earth is "Ramen Lovers Unite" not yet captured by Operation Penguin/Turkey Takeover? This is a travesty! Get your troops over the ramparts now!
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: The owner's been missing for 62 days! You can't take over when there's no one around to convince to hand it over... perhaps if one of you guards/ex guards/heddas would like to help me out...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: And to Paul... that All-Star game sucks! They're not even trying out there!
2008-07-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: You must believe, Nok. Are you believing?! Huh?! Are you?! 'Cause if you don't believe... they'll hunt you down...
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe! *jumps off a cliff*
2008-07-16 [nokaredes]: Believe in what?
2008-07-16 [Paul Doyle]: Five hours and fifteen innings to finish the damn All-Star Game that almost ended in a tie . . . o__O
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: Is the wiki exported? Then someone might be able to put a wiki instead.. You know, not logged in user and such. oO
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I think it is... It should be...
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: Well then that would explain the wiki in the name slot, right? ;)
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: Also.. Yo.. Why are our names all black? :O
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Racist! ...but... I don't know... Hedda keeps changing the names... I'm sure there's a purpose...
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: PAH! XD Yep.. Racist.. *cough* >_> <_<
Oh well.. Yeh I'm sure.. Hey! On ' ' wikiyou said it was you that got the brackets? oO
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: According to [Hedda] on the updates page... *eats ramen*... *flies a kite... sinisterly!!*...
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: Wow.. How bizarre. oO
XD
How can you fly a kite, sinisterly? oO
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: By... uh... glaring at people while I do it...? ...*eats ramen......... sinisterly*...
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: Ooo! Okay that makes a little more sense. ;)
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: .. *cough*
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: :O OH! Deleting comments, are we?
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...n-no! ...*calls to have someone silence Duke Devlin*...
2008-07-16 [Duke Devlin]: ... *cannot be silenced* ... *is a silencer* !!! *loud noises*
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! But silencers quieten guns... like sweetness here. *pulls out gun*... *shoots Misty 67 times*... sorry... I thought you were a bear...
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shoots Misty another 45 times... just in case she actually was a bear*...
2008-07-16 [Paul Doyle]: *burps*
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shrugs*... *shoots Paul a few times*...
2008-07-16 [Paul Doyle]: Hmm, now I resemble a walking block of Swiss cheese *shrugs and walks off*
2008-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Walking?! ...I must not be doing my job... *casually tosses a grenade in Paul's direction*
2008-07-17 [Paul Doyle]: Oh, bugger me *explodes into a billion meaty gobbets*
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeech... hey, Paul... while you're down there, sweep yourself up...
2008-07-17 [Paul Doyle]: *Pauly the Anthro-Dragon appears*


Grawwwr? *breathes fire on his maker's mess*
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... she did it! *points at Nok*
2008-07-17 [Calico Tiger]: Mort! What's with the list of wiki pages, eh? That better not be a harassment list or I'm going to do terrible things to you D:<
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah... that's just some wikis I own... well... me and that Turkey own...
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I should really advertise some of those wikis... they're all dying...
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: As for the targets... they're not mine yet... but they will be.
2008-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kicks down the door*... Yo! ...oops... *notices some sparkling red shoes sticking out from the side of the door*...
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Dorothy, no!!
2008-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I've been telling her I'd get her... now where's her little doggy...? There it is! *attacks that Misty guy*
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: What ever happened to that Misty dude...
2008-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I think it died...
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Meh...
2008-07-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yo! Get better cell phone coverage at yo house! ...as opposed to the coverage you have currently... none...
2008-07-17 [Duke Devlin]: I must ask, oh Mort-tastic one.. *cough* ... How did you get the usernames all alike? oO
2008-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I have powers! ...and a list of characters that look exactly like standard arabic characters...
2008-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Why have there been no comments here in several days...? ...maybe it's all you official looking people hanging around here! [Calico Tiger]! Stop scaring the customers! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-07-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: And [nokaredes]! Put your pants back on! ...wait... on second thought...
2008-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... it's probably best you leave those off... *takes pictures*...
2008-07-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: One of these days we're going to randomly call you again/show up at your house with guns... you know... standard procedure...
2008-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry about last time... we really should get a paternity test to make sure though... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-20 [Duke Devlin]: .... *blink* :)
2008-07-20 [Paul Doyle]: I'm still dead . . . and charred . . . that's my alibi. Unless you want the Pauly the Anthro-Dragon character here, instead?
2008-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *pokes Paul's body*... yup... he's dead alright...
2008-07-20 [Paul Doyle]: *spirit of dead Pauly**creepy ghostly voice* Apply the Peanuts of Pathooooos . . .
2008-07-20 [Duke Devlin]: .... What these? *eatz the Peanutes of Pathooooooooooooooooos* *eerie voice echoed*
2008-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: And don't forget, little kids, to visit... The Best Christmas Story Ever!
2008-07-21 [Paul Doyle]: Ah, the one where Rudolph was abducted by al-Qaeda, and then in a strangely MacGyver-esque manuever, Rudolph ended al-Qaeda with his red nose, some simple chemicals and a lot of duct tape. Oh, he also found the cure to AIDS along the way, and brought home Viagra for Santa and Mrs. Claus.
Anyway . . . *dares to peek at the link*
2008-07-21 [nokaredes]: What house?
2008-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Fine... we'll show up at your box... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *the camera zooms in on Mort for dramatic effect*... *Mort glances around*... *Mort begins to sweat*... *Mort suddenly tears off his vest revealing a bomb!!*... I'll do it! I'll kill us all!
2008-07-22 [Paul Doyle]: *fades back and tilts the camera slightly, augmenting the light filter slightly, to give a sort of John Woo directorialial effect*
2008-07-22 [Imperator]: *decides to stop watching this stupid channel with poor acting and visual effects and flips to Fox News*
2008-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet... Rush is on tour! *sells the camera to buy tickets*
2008-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: As long as my channel is being killed for Fox and not CNN...
2008-07-22 [Imperator]: CNN!!! WHERE??!! LET ME KILL IT!!! *violently eats cookie*
2008-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Larry, NOOO!! ...*holds cookie crumbs*...
2008-07-22 [Imperator]: Glenn Beck filled in for Larry King last night! It was awesome. He beat up the bad guys (liberals). *sweeps away crumbs* Poor guy...
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: All I watch is Colbert and Conan... and sometimes Leno... when he has headlines...
2008-07-23 [nokaredes]: I live with a friend right now. I didn't want an apartment contract because I am going into the military... *won't shut up about that*
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Tell the terrorists that Mortified Penguin sentcha'. That should guarantee your safety... either that or you'll be killed instantly... depends on which terrorists you talk to...
2008-07-23 [nokaredes]: Who says I'll be talking...?
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I says! That's who says! *sends people to kill you for no apparent reason*
2008-07-23 [Imperator]: Are you going to Iraq or Afghanistan?! If you are, fight like hell and teach those scum bags what it means to mess with the United States!
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Shock and Awe, baby! ...and maybe show a little skin while you're over there... it makes 'em mad.
2008-07-23 [Imperator]: HA HA HA! I actually laughed out loud there!
And eat pork! That irks them too!
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: If you really want to make them mad, try and convert them... tell them that the 72 virgins they were promised are actually guys.
2008-07-23 [Imperator]: And tell them you don't wear a burka, let alone own one!
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *snap* Oh no he di'n't!
2008-07-23 [Imperator]: Oh yeah, I went there!
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I assume you brought back souvenirs?
2008-07-23 [Imperator]: Uh... Do AK-47's count?
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: As long as you got them off the black, I mean, African American market.
2008-07-23 [nokaredes]: I lol'd too. I'm thinking I might buy a burka.
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: *appears from a swamp in the back of bob's diner*
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I keep telling you people that that's my swimming pool/nuclear waste dump! ...sheesh... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *Ramen Shack Enterprise Corporation Oragnization Company Inc., the current owners of Bob's Diner, sells Bob's Diner to some rich Hungarian business men from the Southern Hungarian Institute of Theology*... *the new management pledges some money to fund the Ramen Party*... *continues campaigning for the Ramen Party*... We're gonna win that presidency! You'll see!
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: O.O >.> I Was NOT!!!!!!!!!!!! *yawns and kills the new company*
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Noooo! Not the Hungarians! ...*sobs*... *a Mort owned company takes over during the confusion*... *Bob's Diner is now owner by Cryptic Art Inc.*... Luckily, we still get to keep the money those filthy Hungarians supplied to the party...
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: *a chicken bomb attack comes down on the Cryptic Art Inc*
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:
Cryptic Art Inc. takes 2000 damage


Cryptic Art Inc. uses ultimate attack


*the entire diner is destroyed*
2008-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: You destroyed Bob's Diner! ...and it's resident rats! ...speaks to me, Carlos! ...*rat says nothing*... *rat hisses and lunges at my throat*... AAAAEEIII!!
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: *laughs from outside where the diner was* I win!
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at the other fifty thousand and one Bob's Diners behind you*
2008-07-23 [Paul Doyle]: *propels everyone from Bob's Diner to Ceti Alpha VI aka "The Genesis Planet" to be quickly resurrected like Spock----just watch out for those pesky Klingons around Uranus, though!*
2008-07-23 [Paul Doyle]:

2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: No, Spock! Take off that red shirt! You know what happens to people that wear those!
2008-07-23 [Paul Doyle]: Hell, even Captain Kirk died at the end of "Star Trek: Generations", and he was wearing a red shirt . . . or a red vest, anyway :P
2008-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in with his red shirt on*... NOHOHOOO!! ...*is shot to death by Klingons*...
2008-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, that Kirk... now he's fat...
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: *eats popcorn and sips on crystal water* It's crunchy today
2008-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: What's this? Outside food? *the pride of lions viciously mug Eloura*
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: *yawns and throws them Mky D's chicken selects and laughs as the maul ST for sending them out* Anyone for some crystal water, the crystals are really crunchy today
2008-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in with whiskey and ramen*Sup?
2008-07-23 [Eloura]: Yum! *waves hello*
2008-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Want some whiskey?*shakes the bottle at Eloura*
2008-07-24 [Eloura]: *grins* You serving?
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in wielding a knife*... Give me the gold, or this thing gets it! *grabs Misty*
2008-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives you gold*
2008-07-24 [Eloura]: *hands over a gold statue of a penguin*
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What's all this crap?! Where's that silver I asked you for?! *shoots Nok*... I wonder where that Devlin chick went...
2008-07-24 [Paul Doyle]: *instead of crossing Mort's palm with silver, crosses Mort's face with fist*


*is already dead, so we can safely blame this on rigor mortis*
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: My face! You'd better not damage it, or you'll enrage my seven wives!
2008-07-24 [nokaredes]: Haha. I'm going to die 1,000 internet deaths while I'm gone, won't I?
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... maybe more for ditching Bob's Diner!
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Eloura... I think you're the type of person who would question my credibility, forcing me to violently kill you... am I right?
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Well?!
2008-07-24 [Eloura]: WTF??? I don't know >.>
2008-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shrugs*... *kills you anyway*...
2008-07-24 [Duke Devlin]: *misses this place*
2008-07-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmm...interesting
2008-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kicks down the door and bursts in*... My God, Misty! You have a bomb strapped to your face! ...*starts smashing Misty's face with a baseball bat*...
2008-07-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: So that's where I put it.*takes the bomb off and straps it to Mortified Penguin's chest*
2008-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: My God! There's a bomb on Mortified Penguin's chest! .........*beats Misty's face with a baseball bat*...
2008-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! This isn't a bomb! ...*tosses it out the window*... *a large explosion ensues from the place where it landed*... uh... that was a coincidence... *eats ramen*... *also beats Misty's face with a bat*...
2008-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, Nok... remember The Game?!
2008-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *suffers a sudden heart attack*... darn you Kira! ...*corpse lies on the floor*... *corpse eats ramen*...
2008-07-25 [nokaredes]: People respawn way too much in this wiki.
2008-07-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah,oh and thank you Kira!
2008-07-25 [Eloura]: *yawns waking up from the dead*
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sup dead girl?
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: Not much livng the dead life best i can, best thing is though got no taxes. You?
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's all good.
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: Cool!!!!
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yep,so do you want some whiskey?
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: MMmMM Yummy!*smiles and nods*
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you a bottle of whiskey*
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: Thank you! *hand wraps around the bottle*
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your welcome.*drinks some whiskey from my own bottle*
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *drinks some and say's* Pretty good
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah.
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *smiles and mixes my liquor with ramen creating new ramen* lol
2008-07-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cool,I want some.
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *makes you ome and hands it over* Enjoy!
2008-07-26 [nokaredes]: Ew. Alcohol flavoured ramen.
2008-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Why must eveyone else eat ramen...? That makes it seem unoriginal when I do it... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-26 [Imperator]: They're all immitations of the REAL Mortified Penguin! You should hunt them down and have them executed IMMEDIATLY!
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: I've always ate ramen!!!!!!!!!!! SOO HA!
2008-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Hunting people down...? ...sounds fun. *gets gun off the wall*
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *grins and bounds about* HI HI!! I WANNA GO HUNTING!!!!!!
2008-07-26 [Araglas]: *walks in and looks around* Uh-oh...somehow I always get shot when hunting...by! *tries to leave*
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *tackles araglas* Awww help us!!!!!!!
2008-07-26 [Araglas]: I dont wanna get shot! *hides under table* Ok..I'll help...but I want a garuntee I wont get shot...
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *follows you under the table* but with Mortified Penguin shoots anyone i can't garunte anything... But we can try!
2008-07-26 [Araglas]: Ok then!!! *turns into a penguin* I shall lead the way, what are we hunting?
2008-07-26 [Imperator]: Ramen eaters. Besides [Mortified Penguin]...
2008-07-26 [Araglas]: Ok...where do we look?
2008-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: In yo mama!
2008-07-26 [Araglas]: .....*wanders around looking under random furniture*
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: *pokes everyone*
2008-07-26 [Imperator]: Hee hee!
2008-07-26 [Duke Devlin]: >=D
2008-07-26 [Eloura]: O>O I'm A Birdie!!!
2008-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've eaten Ramen since I was 7,SO THERE!
2008-07-27 [Imperator]: *bang* So you're dead.
2008-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *bang*Now you are dead.
2008-07-27 [Imperator]: Ha! I lived longer than you!
2008-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I lived longer! *shoots self*... suckers.
2008-07-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm 17 almost 18.
2008-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSb-nV8l2QY&feature=related
2008-07-27 [Duke Devlin]: .. Wow.. We're comparing ages now, Misty? oO How very mature of you. *sarcastic appluase*
2008-07-27 [Eloura]: *reappears lost* What happened in here!!! *throws confetti*
2008-07-27 [Keir Devlin]: Steph dear, Misty is just aiming for attention. try not to pay attention to dogs when they beg.
:)
2008-07-28 [Duke Devlin]: Oh, I thank you Len dearest. I always did have a problem ignoring animals. I guess I just have to work harder.
;)
Well suave btw.
2008-07-28 [Araglas]: *is so lost in this conversation right now, that he has no clue what is up or down*
2008-07-28 [Eloura]: *joins in agreeing with araglas* It's cvommon to being confued with them
2008-07-28 [Araglas]:   
2008-07-28 [Keir Devlin]: ;] I know.
2008-07-28 [nokaredes]: Wow. We need someone here who can edit comments so they don't have so many spelling/typing mistakes >_> (My comments too, of course.)
2008-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Editing comments is the government's job... and speaking of the government, they are a bunch of [geniuses]! I [lоve] the government so much! If I could, I would [hug] every single politician with a machine gun... *eats [government processed food, which is delicious]*...
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Why is nobody commenting again?! ...that's it... I'm going to find some new suckers/customers...
2008-07-30 [xX-Sarahanne-Xx]: Hmmm Referring to me as a Sucker? mr [Mortified Penguin] ? that isnt very polite. xP
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: N-no... that wasn't me... it was [nokaredes]. You should kill her.
2008-07-30 [whitehot]: RAMEN?!?!?!?!?!?!?! WHERE!!!!?!?!?! *starts foaming at mouth* GIVE ME RAMEN!!!!!!! OR ILL THROW A SQUIGGLY AT YOU!!!!! ~
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... squiggly...
2008-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives [whitehot] some ramen*
2008-07-30 [nokaredes]: Don't give in to their demands! Darn it, Misty, who trained you in negotiation...?
2008-07-30 [Imperator]: Democrats.
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn those democrats... always complaining when I "torture" my customers... *eats ramen*... *whips Misty with metal wiring*...
2008-07-30 [whitehot]: *eats the ramen* mmmmmmmmmm
2008-07-30 [whitehot]: why did you whip her? its the democrats you should be pissed off at
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty's the closest thing though... except Nok over there... but she whips back... *kicks Misty while she's down*...
2008-07-30 [whitehot]: oh.........*eats more ramen* *steals ramen from mortified penguin* MINE!!!!!!!!!
2008-07-30 [whitehot]: *picks up whip* dont you try anything or this happens *flails whip wildly in air* yeah.... you'll die
2008-07-30 [xX-Sarahanne-Xx]: I wouldnt do that. he got pissed at me when I tried to xP
2008-07-30 [whitehot]: but i got a whip. and a special weapon...........
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: My ramen! ...*takes an AK-47 off the wall and fires randomly, killing many innocent people*...
2008-07-30 [Imperator]: Do you work for Blackwater?
2008-07-30 [nokaredes]: ...so Turkey's still alive, then?
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... I work for Brownwater.
2008-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *is not alive*
2008-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks the Turkey*... *tosses it into the freezer*...
2008-07-31 [Pillowthief]: *thinks that Turkey was never alive to begin with and Mort now has a angry robot in his freezer*
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, it's that Pillowthief guy! *tosses him in the freezer with the homocidal robot*
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: *presses button on secret weapon* *all ramen that mortified penguin owns blows up*
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the offbrand 'wrahmen' I always used to eat*
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: *eats tacos* mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! I was going to eat those tacos! *hurls whitehot into the freezer too*... wait... that looks like fun! *locks himself in the freezer as well*
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: im cold *randomly brings out banana* DANCE BANANA DANCE!!!!! *silence*
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *shivs the banana in the kidney*
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: *banana starts dancing* YES. *sits on him* oops
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: here you can have on of my other ones to play with.... i got to go
2008-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: im back.......and i exploded
2008-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is in the deep freezer*
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: *puts deep freezer in hotub..... hehe im evil
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: well i got to go .... again......im tired.... *crawls to bed*
2008-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets out*HOW RUDE!*sits in corner*
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I could have sworn I put a wall mine in that corner... *eats ramen*...
2008-07-31 [nokaredes]: Am I not in the freezer...?
2008-07-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pulls Nok into the freezer*... *does typical robot stuff*...
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Typical robot stuff?! You sicko!
2008-07-31 [whitehot]: O_O
2008-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: o_O
2008-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! Misty has abnormal eyes! *punches Misty with his tentacle*... take that, you freak!
2008-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY!*tackles [Mortified Penguin] to the ground*
2008-07-31 [nokaredes]: Ooh, kinky.
2008-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT?!
2008-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I've got this sudden urge... to kill... well, not so sudden, actually... it's been here for quite a while... *stabs Misty*...
2008-08-01 [whitehot]: i have a sudden urge to eat a taco.. *eats taco*
2008-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have a sudden urge to finally do this...*stabs [Mortified Penguin]'s eyes out*
2008-08-01 [nokaredes]: I have no sudden urges...
2008-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: •_•!! ...I can't see!! ...*gropes around*... *molests many girls nearby, except Misty*... ah, there's my ramen! ...*chews on Nok's now shorter hair*...
2008-08-01 [nokaredes]: That's not me with shorter hair! That's a grizzly bear!
2008-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *is mauled*... ha! So that's why they call him grizzly! NOOOO!! *is violently slashed*
2008-08-01 [Paul Doyle]: Eww, Mort ate ramen made from Nok's hair . . . is that rather like french-frying spaghetti noodles?
2008-08-01 [HardRockAngel]: What is "ramen"?
2008-08-01 [whitehot]: *watches all this while eating ramen* hehe
2008-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is next to [whitehot] laughing*
2008-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats slightly molted ramen*...
2008-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmmm....
2008-08-01 [nokaredes]: Molted or molded?
2008-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Oh, it's definitely molted...
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: hey.....my bowls empty.........*throws it at mort* HOW COULD YOU LET THIS HAPPEN!?!?!?!??!?!?!?
2008-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: What do you think this is, some kind of diner?! Take your business elsewhere, freak! ...*slaps you with his tentacle*...
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *orders pizza from pizza hut,and ramen from ramen hut*
2008-08-02 [nokaredes]: Haha! Tentacle.
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2008-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I almost misspelled "tentacles" as "testicles" earlier... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I just finished watching Sweeney Todd... that was some disturbing stuff... now... who needs a shave?! ...*sharpens razor*...
2008-08-02 [Paul Doyle]: "Attend the tale of Sweeney Todd/His skin was pale, and his eye was odd . . ."


See this live, if you can, whether on Broadway if you're in the Big Apple, whether it's at your local college (which is where I saw it, back in 1991), or whether it's a cheesy sort of low-budget high school drama club presentation complete with knockover cardboard sets and lots of duct tape.


Also . . . contrary to popular perception (that everyone in Theatre is gayer than Elton John in San Francisco), there's some really cute, intelligent young women involved in theatre. Bear that in mind, Mort. Mull that over while you eat some more ramen ;-)
2008-08-02 [Imperator]: I've been wondering about the "This wiki sponsored in part by the [Sunrose] Does Not Suck committee". Is it saying that Sunrose herself does not suck or is it Sunrose's Does Not Suck Committee?
2008-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: That would be saying that Sunrose herself does not suck... after she finally returned this wiki... 'cause she had stolen it... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: *listens to this all intently while eating ramen* *falls asleep when paul starts talking* RANTER
2008-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals whitehot's ramen while he/she/it sleeps*
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2008-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Your repeated dotdotdoting is unnecessary...
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: *wakes up*........wheres my ramen?!?!?!
YOU HAVE IT MORT!!!
*kills mort* *walks happily away eating ramen* by the way im a boy
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs at Mort*
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: that really helped me with my anger... *hears moan* *stabs mort again*
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*I like you whitehot,you are funny,and cool
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: why thank you.........OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!......FLYING TACO TACO LORD!!!! *starts dancing*
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws tacos in the air*
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: *catches tacos* *puts them in pocket* *stands there like nothing happened*
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: <_<  >_>  ^_^........i saw a fairy
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Really?
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: yesit scared me........so i ate it
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: you know what......noodle flippin
NOODLE
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives you ramen*
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: thank you.. THANK YOU SOOOOO MUCH
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your Welcome.
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: *eats it* yumm
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: hey i made some schools.... psychiatrist and school for the mentally deranged
2008-08-02 [whitehot]: i got to go bye
2008-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: bye
2008-08-03 [xX-Sarahanne-Xx]: JESUS CHRIST Y'ALL CMNT WAYY TOO FUCKING MUCH.
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: No they don't! They don't comment nearly enough! ...especially Nok!
2008-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: hehehe
2008-08-03 [xX-Sarahanne-Xx]: Mmmhmm Sure ;)
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: What do you mean, I don't comment enough? I bet I've contributed more comments than anyone who wasn't Turkey and you!
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Exactly! Why aren't you commenting more than me?! ...jerk... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: I don't because I am not a loser who sits around all day eating and obsessively waiting for comments on this wiki :)
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Why not?! Forget having a life! Stay online nonstop! ...gosh... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's just silly Mort.
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: I'd rather do other stuff, like go outside and get a tan, and learn how to perform surgery...(and not from Wikipedia)
2008-08-03 [PLAYBOY CHICK]: hey what's u!!!!anyone on here from nc
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Amateur Surgeon! Now on adultswim.com! It'll teach you all you need to know.
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: Where is this "nc" you speak of...?
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope, AL here.
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah... "nc" reminds me of the old days...
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: I know, I was just thinking about that...
2008-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the...?
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: ...the hell?
2008-08-03 [nokaredes]: I've always found it interesting that to shorten that phrase, you only omit one word, so you would end up saying "the" twice.
2008-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes interesting.
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *a tiny leprechaun bursts in*... "Where's me Lucky Charms?!"... *he starts shooting people with a tiny AK-47*...
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Noooo! Pocahontas!! ...*holds her dead body in my hands*... wait... nevermind... this is just Sacagawea... *tosses her out the window*...
2008-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the Hell...?
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, Misty?! Why won't you say anything different or original?! ...wait... it can't be! Misty's a... robot!! *rips out Misty's wiring*
2008-08-03 [Imperator]: I pretty much hate you now Mort. You should walk home alone tonight...
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks home alone in shame*
2008-08-03 [Imperator]: *jumps out of the darkness and stabs you to death* Revenge...
2008-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *dies slowly*... Ah... excellent revenge, sir. *dies*
2008-08-04 [whitehot]: *eats ramen* WAAAAAAHHHHHHH *explodes* *reforms as flamingo*
2008-08-04 [nokaredes]: *eats clams*
2008-08-04 [Imperator]: You can get sick from eating uncooked clams. They're full of disease... and stuff.
2008-08-04 [nokaredes]: I fried them... sorta...
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Deep fry them suckers! ...*eats deep fried ramen*...
2008-08-04 [Chimes]: Why'd you invite me? :P Also why would someone want the password to your username?
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Who knows... *eats ramen*... but someone better enter that contest!
2008-08-04 [Chimes]: I would if I had time. You never know... I might get time. It all depends.
2008-08-04 [Delladreing]: *considers this*
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: It depends? Does it depend on Misty? 'Cause I'll kill her if you need me too...
2008-08-04 [Chimes]: It depends on whether I'm busy. :P Manipulations to manipulate... Recordings to record... Homework to homework and all that jazz...
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: So I see. I've never really liked jazz all that much...
2008-08-04 [Chimes]: I like the musical Chicago. *shrugs* Though... I can't name a musical that I've seen that I don't like so that's hardly surprising. But anywho, we were on about jazz...
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of musicals... I've always loathed the Sound of Music.
2008-08-04 [Chimes]: So have most people. XD
2008-08-04 [Ramirez]: =O
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: It's a Ramirez! *shoots at it*
2008-08-04 [Ramirez]: GAH! -runs about flailing- T.T
2008-08-04 [Pnelma Tirian]: LOLWUT
2008-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... ah... good ol' "invite" button...
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: Stop inviting me to wikis >_<
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!
2008-08-05 [leaving fo good]: can i be the waiter?
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... Yes you can. Now go get me some ramen!
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: Don't work too hard, though!
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet, you! You still haven't brought me that macchiato I asked for three years ago!
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: You wouldn't want it anymore... It's three years old by now. Assuming it was made at all...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Mmm... three year old coffee...
2008-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Mort likes his women like he likes his coffee... Old, black, and creamy...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn straight! *makes out with your mom*
2008-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! I'll kill you!
2008-08-05 [NamelessMerc]: 0.0 Okay... I remember looking at this years ago, before a lot of stuff was on it. jeez, it looks different
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare you leave for several years?!
2008-08-05 [zepher]: Why was I invited?
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: To comment... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *sits at his desk*... it's quiet in here... *orders more ramen from the Ramen Shack down the road*...
2008-08-05 [Ramirez]: Rawr.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Are you the ramen guy? What happened to Jim?
2008-08-05 [Paul Doyle]: "He's dead, Jim!"
2008-08-05 [iippo]: I'm already watching this, you goober :P
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: >.> <.<
2008-08-05 [Teufelsweib]: to how many people did you send an invitation?
2008-08-05 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *slowly walks in* ... o_o; I was offered an invitation to come.
2008-08-05 [twitchboy]: ....hello all
2008-08-05 [whitehot]: if you have problems go to my school psychiatrist
2008-08-05 [whitehot]: or if your mental go to school for the mentally deranged note: i need teachers and assistants to... for both schools
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: Paul, you got a miserable, awesome song stuck in my head >_<
2008-08-05 [Particle Girl]: Why was I invited to this stupid wiki? :/
2008-08-05 [Teufelsweib]: we all were =/
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Suckers!
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: I like how it doesn't get rid of the invite-notification unless you click it, no matter how many other times you visit.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I just wish it wouldn't go away until someone comments here...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *ramen truck finally arrives*... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: That would be a bad feature for all wiki. But it would make sense for this one...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Why you get plenty of comments? Think of the poor people who rarely get commented...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: At least the number of watchers has risen slightly thanks to the new thing that makes you watch a page when you comment... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: But think of the people who have even more comments! We must steal their comments and give to the commentless...
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: I bet half the watchers are dead accounts, like [la vie lemon]...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: This wiki's economy is based on comments... every time someone comments, they automatically become a shareholder. The more comments that are generated, the more this wiki's economy thrives! It's doing much better now, but back in '06 and '07 it suffered a bit... it was probably Nok's fault... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Dead?! *sign of the cross* Vaya con Dios.
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: I bet this wikis comments are going to drop by 1/4 when I leave for those weeks...
2008-08-05 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Is that all there is to do here... eat ramen?
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: No, it's kinda like an RP here usually... like when the lions attack... *chickens peck Mortimer to death*
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: My face! Stinkin' chickens! *the pride of lions burst in and... also attack my face!*... traitors! *lies on the floor, faceless*
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: Ooh, are you gonna get a new face now, like in the movies...?
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Well... when are you going to start giving comments to the commentless?
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *it turns out only half my face was eaten*... *flips a coin*...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: We'll get to that later... *eats ramen*... *flips coin*...
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: Why would we do that? They should go out and get jobs, then they won't need to beg for comments...
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: Two-face! *points accusingly*
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Who, me?! *flips a coin*... *coin lands on the black side*... *shoots Misty*...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Haha. Do you have something against Misty, then?
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Not really... It's just fun to shoot him/her...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: LOL
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Where is that Misty...? I haven't seen it around today... *flips coin*... *coin lands in ramen*... *accidentally eats coin*... *chokes to death*...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Hahaha.


That was both at you and not at you. People make me giggle.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: You must laugh pretty hysterically when in large crowds then... *is still dead*... Avenge me!
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Ah, I forgot to specify what people... hypocrites, mainly. XD Make me giggle.
2008-08-05 [nokaredes]: *buries you out in the cornfield behind B's D*
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Mmm... Hippo Grits...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Cornfield?! How long has this field been here...?
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Lol. XD Foreveeeerrrr~ *wiggles fingers spookily*
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: That's what she said.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was in jail.muhahahahaha
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it... why'd they let you out...? ...and after I wasted all that money bribing the jury at your case...
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: because it was my first time doing what I did.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: So?! They shouldn't be so lenient after you killed those 24 children...
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Actually, it was two baker's dozens of children.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was arrested for shoplifting.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Shoplifting a baker's dozen of children?
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: No,I shoplifted some books and an action figure.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Well... that was stupid.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I did for a dare.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: THAT was even more stupid. =_=
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: No actually it wasn't since I did the dare I got 50 dollars.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: That's still stupid.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: So?
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: So... that may say something about you... >.> Dares is overrated. Also... you can get more money than that by NOT giving in to pointless endeavors that only cause you trouble. If you're telling the truth, that is...
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok you caught me,I couldn't go through with the dare,I mean hey I'd rather be called a chicken then a shoplifting jailbird.
2008-08-05 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Ooh, I see. @_@
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yep
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Why lie about it? Saying you did it makes people think less of you and also think you're a liar...
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, I shoplift all the time... all the cool kids are doing it! ...*eats stolen ramen*...
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well I'm a dork,I'm not cool.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: All the 'Cool' kids need reality checks, as do those who try to be like them.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: *points at [Chimes]*
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmm....
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Why are you pointing at me?
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: You ruined it. I was implying that you were trying to be cool. Nice going... *glares*
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: very interesting.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: No, I'm just an opinionated little bint... and currently moody.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why is something wrong?
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Nothing I'd care to divulge. So no.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Psssst! That means she is desperate to tell someone but won't admit it.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: No, that means that the only person that I'd ever be willing to tell already knows. Don't put words in my mouth.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's probally Personal,and most people don't like to tell personal things to strangers.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Bingo. A cookie to contender number two.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: By the way [Imperator], if you're going to advertise The Herald... advertise the whole issue... people may not realise that it's part of something else.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY I LOVE COOKIES!*eats a cookie*
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: *takes words out of [Chimes]'s mouth* You really shouldn't eat these things raw...


Considering that at the top of the article it says "The Town Herald" in a big Golden simi-circle, it's kinda hard to miss, isn't it?...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Keep your hands out of my mouth. O.O


Yeah... but think of the newbies. Some people don't even know what The Herald is. Plus... it's better for the team.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes Chimes is right.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Poor little newbies. Do you remember what it was like being a newbie? I do. It was a sad time.
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,yes it was.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: When I was a newbie I ran around pissing people off. And it seems I still do...
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was confused about well everything.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: When I was a newbie... I created pointless wikis... my current wikis aren't pointless... you should look at them sometime.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Throw some links at me and I will.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: There are some on my house... but I shall throw you two.
Chimes' Special Stars << That's just me being soppy. XD
A Touch of Legato << That was featured wiki a few weeks ago and is my vocal and lyrical portfolio...
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Here, check this out: Elftown Archives
Maybe you have some stuff you'd like to contribute?


And "soppy"? XP What on Earth? lol
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol I have a poetry and an art wiki.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: :P It's hard to explain ...


I'm iffy about putting my written works online... and my lyrics are staying on ATOL... but I'll have a look.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Though, saying that, my lyrics will be going on my site eventually...
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Okay, seriously. I was expecting some nice wiki but instead you send me your "these people are cool" list which basically means "if you aren't on this list you suck". Thanks for vocalizing that you pretty much hate me...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: No... A LOT of people on my relations list aren't on there. I haven't spoken to you enough. People that aren't on that list do not suck, that's an immature way to react. That wiki is for those that are outstanding... not just cool. Like I said, I haven't spoken to you enough for you to fit into at least on of the categories. It is VERY hard to get on that list.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: Awwww c'mon. I'm just kidding, lol. If you bother to talk to me in the future, you'll find that most things I say in regular conversations are sarcastic or stupid jokes.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: P.s I find it hard to hate people but if I hated you... you would know.
2008-08-05 [Imperator]: 0.0 Oh my... I'll be sure to avoid your hatred...
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Why would I not talk to you?


I apologise... I'm in the kind of mood that makes me very defensive. Sorry. =_=


Also ... Did you click the other link? That's the one that I'd like people to look at most... feedback is hard to come by now-a-days... :(
2008-08-05 [Paul Doyle]: Wow, Bob's Diner going Drama-Llama and Emo-Emu. Go figure.


*gets back to cooking crock pot food and coloring "Bohemian Rhapsody parody picture*
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Oi, my nickname is Emu. :P (Shortened form of my name)
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Emu?That's a cute nickname.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: What's with the lack of asterisks here? ...*eats ramen*... We've got a contract with the asterisk company! If the diner drops below 20 asterisks a minute... it'll blow up! ...wait... what am I talking about...? ...*eats asterisks*... mmm... pointy...
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: What are asterisks?
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: The Stars *


***************
That help?


Emu is short for Emma-Louise. ^^
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I should kill you, misty...
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Go ahead,I don't mind.But just a warning if you do I will haunt you untill the day you die.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Hmm... tough choice... It's going to be a hard one, Mort.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what muder/suicides were invented for!
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: A valid point.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: And a very pointy point at that.
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Oh yes. The pointiest.
2008-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course it is. I would know... I'm a professional!
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: I see,well I can keep you from getting killed or killing yourself.  
2008-08-05 [Chimes]: At making points? May I have your autograph?
2008-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: Misty could be B's D's Moaning Myrtle... bathrooms are awesome for the haunting...
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,yes they are.
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *smartly quips*... Dur-hur!
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: What's wrong Mort?
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out a large knife*... DUR-HUR!!!!! *stabs misty*...
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *dies and haunts the bathroom*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts an "out of order" sign on the bathroom door*... *eats tacos*... *gets volatile, explosive diarrhea*... *bursts into Misty's toilet and unleashes hell*... Could you hand me some toilet paper?... *eats ramen from the toilet*...
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you toilet paper from the next stall*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Dur-hur!
2008-08-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: *torches the bathroom*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I torched your mom last night!
2008-08-06 [Duke Devlin]: 2008-08-05 [Chimes]: Well... when are you going to start giving comments to the commentless?
MEMZ! CLEARLY you just don't know Mort well enough. ;) He doesn't WORK for comments! :O Why do an even trade? B's D is the best place to be! *coughs and wanders off*
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: You should threaten to blackmail anyone who uses that bathroom...
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Blackmail?! Racist...
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: What is up with what bathroom?
*falls out of sky*
2008-08-06 [whitehot]: i have my own bathroom
2008-08-06 [spider]: Whitemail..?
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: LMAO! Weph, you're like the phantom commenter.... you come, you comment and then like a flash you're gone. WHOOSH! Anywho... :P
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: =P
2008-08-06 [whitehot]: *explodes... i dead :)
2008-08-06 [thisfleshatomb]: wow i feel special i got invited to something
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Me too... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-06 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: A friend told me to come here.
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: You must have wise friends... Go and thank them. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-06 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I will
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: .........unless it was Misty. Then smack her.
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: ???
Why are you so violent? Is that because of the ramen? :P
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... yes it is... *violently eats ramen*...
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: *creeps away*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: what would happen if...*takes the bowl of ramen*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the bowl of ramen in my other hand*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: I took the bowl already >_<
*snatches it again for good measures*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the other bowl of ramen in my other other hand*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: ...
Do you spawn the bowls? :P
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ............maybe... *eats pizza... with ramen on top*...
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: ...
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: You! You look like ramen! *lunges at HardRockAngel*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *sees [Mortified Penguin] lunging*
yayks xD
Please don't put me on the menu, I taste horrible
x)
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: LMAO
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: ?
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: It was funny lol.
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: ^^ kkay
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes it was funny,and don't assume I told [~Queen Of The Shadows~] to come here Mort.
2008-08-06 [whitehot]: *eats ramen*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *assumes it anyway*... besides... that person has been here before. I think I accused it of meing a Misty clone then... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *tries ramen*
*doesn't know what she is eating*
Ah well, I am hungry xD
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: You want to know what ramen is HardRockAngel?
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: Yes please ^^
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ramen is a Japanese noodle dish that originated in China. It tends to be served in a meat-based broth, and uses toppings such as sliced pork,dried seaweed,kamaboko,green onions,and even corn.Almost every locality or prefecture in Japan has its own variation of ramen,from the tonkotsu ramen of Kyūshū to the miso ramen of Hokkaidō.You can also just get Ramen noodles,and you could add shrimp to Ramen noodles.
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: Now I want to try it in real life :)
*eats ramen*
Virtual will have to do for now =P
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup... [~Queen Of The Shadows~] is a Misty clone... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: What do you have against her?
She is a nice girl =)
Is that the ramen speaking again? =P
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: He's always saying mean things to me just to try to annoy me.
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: He told me the ramen makes him violent
*snatches it and sends it to a lab for a chemical compound-test*
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: The ramen only makes him violent because I give him ramen laced with chemicals :)
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: Evil, evil you xD
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: 
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: *slaps Mortimer for no reason at all*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: xD
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! I didn't want to use that coupon yet! I was saving it!
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *eats sushi*
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: Ewww
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: Sushi is delicious ^^
*is eating it*
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: SUSHI!*steals your Sushi*I love Sushi!
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom's delicious! ...*eats ramen*... *spits on your sushi*...
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY!*cries*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Mwa ha haa! *eats some victory ramen*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *spits in your "victory" ramen*
*gets a new plate of sushi, victory sushi ;)*
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *bitch slaps Mortified Penguin fifty times*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah-ha! This isn't my victory ramen! It's my decoy ramen! ...*eats the real victory ramen*... *hires trained guards to protect the sacred ramen*...
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: O.o Wow. This brings a new meaning to 'food-fight'.
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: That wasn't funny! *chickens burst in and attack Chimes*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *spits in the sacred ramen with the stealth of a ninja*
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: *bribes the guards (not the Guards) to give her Mortimer's victory ramen* ...ew, spit! :O
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: It wasn't supposed to be funy, it was an observation. *swats at chickens*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: Woops   
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha! Suckers! ...there never really was any victory ramen! I fooled you! HA HA H- crap... those guards were expensive... and now I'm hungry...
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *offers sushi*
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: So this is just regular ramen? So boring. *throws it in the dumpster full of rotting corpses out back*
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! Dumpster ramen! *dives in*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *is still offering sushi*
You prefer dumpsterfood over fresh sushi? Silly guy :P
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: Sushi is disgusting :P
2008-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*accidently eats a piece of corpse*... eww! Pillowthief! ...*spits it out*... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: Lmao.
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: I just hope he doesn't try to drink any broth... it's more liquids from decomposition than broth...
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *Offers [Chimes] sushifree sushi*
How did the link work btw? Were you able to hear the singing? :s
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: If you're on about the recordings... it didn't work :(
What is sushifree sushi?
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: Dammit =s
And about the sushi= you have sushi that is like an omelet with surimi in it ^^
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: I really wanted to hear too. :(


I don't know what surimi is XD
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: I'll try to re-record and save differently when I have the time ^^


that's crabfree crab =P
It looks like crab, tastes like crab, but is no crab ( some call it crap xD)
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: How's the ramen, [Mortified Penguin]?
2008-08-06 [Chimes]: YAY! *dances, rave-style* Pah... I can't dance.


O.o; Wow... that's odd.
2008-08-06 [nokaredes]: Oh man, that omelet sounds awesome...
2008-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *dances around nok*
2008-08-06 [HardRockAngel]: *offers some to [nokaderes]*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *dances around HardRockAngel and Nokaredes*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *dances too*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY!
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: some more sushi, misty? *offers some with additional pickled ginger, wasabi or soy-sauce*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY!*takes some with pickled ginger*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *happily supplies more*
*is munching on wasabi-coated sushi*
*is running around looking for water*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you a bottle of water*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *gladly accepts it to put out the fire*
thank you ^^
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: You're welcome.
2008-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: What is wrong with you people?! This isn't typical Bob's Diner banter! ...*chickens, lions, and some guy named Steve burst in and tackle Misty*...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh Kinky!
2008-08-07 [Paul Doyle]: Craving pizza, sick of ramen but have no cash to order pizza, and stuck with too much ramen anyway?


(1.) Preheat oven to 300.
(2.) Cook 5-6 blocks of ramen instant noodles. Drain completely in colander, and stir in small amounts of olive oil and Italian seasoning mix/onion powder/garlic powder.


(3.) Spray large pizza pan with non-stick cooking spray.


(4.) Spread olive oiled, spiced noodles across pizza pan. Be sure the mix is neither too drippy nor too dry. (Add bread crumbs or more olive oil, if need be.)


(5.) Cook at 300 for 30-45 minutes until you have a Boboli wanna-be "crust". Don't let it burn, and if it's soft and mushy give it a few more minutes.


(6.) Remove, then add sauce, cheese, more spices, and then maybe your favorite toppings (more ramen?) cook this "pizza" until cheese is golden-brown.


(7.) Eat and enjoy!
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! That thing sounds disturbing... I should try it...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,yes you should.
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: You guys need to stop talking about real food that sounds awesome. No, seriously.
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *evil mutant monkeys burst in and rape [Mortified Penguin]*
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! That's lame, Mister... real lame. ...*eats ramen*... *puts up anti-misty propaganda signs all over the place*...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is disguised as Tobi from Naruto*
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I would ask who that is, but I don't really care... *eats ramen*... I no longer like Naruto... I hate animes where nobody ever dies. The one time someone did, he got brought back to life! That sucked! ...Death Note, on the other hand... almost all of the main characters ended up dead! That was pretty sweet! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-07 [Paul Doyle]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12Zy1xwaaN4
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Haku and Zabuza died
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, but nobody liked them...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: Spoilers much? o_o
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Only if you haven't made it past the first three episodes... and Naruto's extremely predictable...
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Unless you were talking about Deathy Note?
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmm...
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: I meant you shouldn't spoil it for other people...
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?!! I'll kill you, Misty! ...besides... I'm not gay, man... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: I said "what?" when I saw it first, too... out loud, even... then I checked the wiki-edits t make sure it was Misty, not Mortimer, who edited that...
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: Man, I'd feel sorry for those kids... but mostly because of Mortimer...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was kidding jeez.  
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! That's mutiny, Nok! Colonel Turkey! Take her to the bridge!
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: What is wrong with you?*smack Mortified Penguin*
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: The bridge? Wouldn't that be a bad place for prisoners and disgraced crew? (To the laundry brig!)
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The brig is for chumps! We use bridges here.
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...
2008-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Screw you! Take her to the bridge yourself! ...*does nothing*... *mutinizes*...
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! That's it! You three! Take yourselves to the bridge! ...*eats ramen*... ah... that's some good captaining, Mort... *pats himself on the genitals back*...
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn Futurama... with it's fancy laundry brigs...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: *appears*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *appears too*
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: Muahaha. Like two appearing things.
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *or something-ish like that* =P
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: :D *prances around*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *mimics chimes*
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: O.o I have a mimic.
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *Mimics chimes saying*
O.o I have a mimic.
*got bored and reverted to her own person*


*is eating noodles with chicken for dinner -yum-
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: Hehe. To Code! Man... I sound like a nerd...
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: Code? o.o what is that? =s
2008-08-07 [x-tacy]: hey whats for lunch?
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: I am coding stuff on my website... :P
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: Neat, I get to see the bridge now! *messes with the navigation controls*
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *walks in with zombies* Ok, got some fresh ones! Anyone for Zombie burgers?
2008-08-07 [x-tacy]: Mmmmmmmmm zombie burgers sounds delicious... ill take 2...
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: Are there zombie-noodles?
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: I can make some noodles if you like! *walks into kitchen with long line of zombies and in 30 minutes comes out with 2 zombie burgers and a bolw of steaming Zombie noodles* Here you are~
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *takes chopsticks and starts to munch*
Thankies ^^
*pays him*
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *takes money and puts it in cash register* Thank you! Would you like anything else?
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: An OJ would be great ^^
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *fixes glass of OJ and slids it to you* There you are!
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: Thanks
*pays*
May I also make a menu suggestion?
*All you can eat: [HardRockAngel]'s little brother: an endless supplie of meat ;)
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: lol you can post it yourself lol if you want to
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: kk ^^
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah,I want two zombie burgers please Araglas.
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: Ok then! *walks back into the kitchen, a smash is heard, about 30 minutes later a zombie walks out and hands you your two burgers*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY!
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *the zombie walks back into the kitchen and more slicing is heard*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: What is the dessert-special for today?
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What's this? I missed an opportunity at an OJ joke?!
2008-08-07 [Chimes]: Apparently so.
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *runs out of the kitchen* And if you ever try to feed me to my costumors again, I will make sure you stay dead when I mash you into meat!!!


*looks atround then laughs* Is there anything anyone needs?
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *raises hand*
yes, a dessert please ^^
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: Hmmm what kind of desert?
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *raises hand*me too.
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: What do you have without zombies/maggots and is so sweet one bite makes your teeth rot?
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: That sounds yummy.
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...we've got ramen. But you can't have any... *pours sugar into his ramen*...
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *steals a bit of the sugary ramen*
*makes a "what-the-hell-is-that-crap"-face*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's Mort speacial Ramen,it's made of fish babies and noodles.
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *is sad* No Zombie desert?
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *No zombie, but sugardessert
*saa should never know about this :P*
2008-08-07 [Araglas]: *sits in corner cleaning cups*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *sigh*
Okay, I'll take the zombie dessert ^^
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Me too.
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: Hold the maggots tho. I don't like my desserts too crunchy =P
2008-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in*... this here's a forced intervention! Put down that ramen, Mort!
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *sends a hungry cat to Turkey*
He likes his ramen, let him have it >_>
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!! *grabs a gun off the wall and shoots himself*
2008-08-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah... the awesome power of the intervention...
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: ...
*Takes the ramen*
*eats ramen*
No use letting this go to waste =P
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: I missed an OJ joke, too -_- Are there costumers here? Because I want to be Tinkerbell...
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives you a Tinkerbell costume*
2008-08-07 [nokaredes]: Whee! *runs around flapping her arms*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *giggles*
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Giant crane! *shoots at Nok*
2008-08-07 [Eloura]: VIVA LA REVOLUTION!!!!!
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Viva la Counter-Revolución!
2008-08-07 [Eloura]: *snails attack* Faster!!! *three months later the first snail reaches bob's diner everyone looks around saying* WTF?!?!?!
2008-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *turns them into a French dish*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: I wonder...*pours salt on the snail*
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: *saves the snail*
that is such a cruel thing to do =o
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't know it would work.
2008-08-07 [HardRockAngel]: it makes them sizzle and dehydrates them
*pets the snail*
there there, no harm done ^^
*sets it free*
2008-08-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sorry little snail.*waves*
2008-08-08 [Eloura]: *watches the snail disappear and mutters something about needng cheetas next time*
2008-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2008-08-08 [nokaredes]: Who are you calling giant?
2008-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who said giant?
2008-08-08 [nokaredes]: 22:08:20 [Mortified Penguin]: Giant crane! *shoots at Nok*
2008-08-08 [thisfleshatomb]: *looks around*
2008-08-08 [x-tacy]: im bored and hungry
2008-08-08 [whitehot]: EATS RAMEN YoU IDIOT..... *eats ramen* *explodes* *dances with poptarts*
2008-08-08 [x-tacy]: ha ha your funny...
2008-08-08 [thisfleshatomb]: 
silly people
2008-08-08 [HardRockAngel]: That looks like that fat german kid getting mad because his game didn't start ^^
-all hail youtube xD-
2008-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *a spotlight appears*... *Mort dives in through the window, doing awesome flips*... *unfortunetly, Mort suffers deep wounds from getting cut by the glass on the window*... *Mort slowly bleeds to death, flopping helplessly on the floor*... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: S'up, weird new people?!
2008-08-08 [HardRockAngel]: Nothing much
*steals ramen   *
2008-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: That was the one ramen! I must throw it into the boiling pot of Mt. Doom!
2008-08-08 [nokaredes]: *does not know the Youtube video [HardRockAngel] is referring to*
2008-08-08 [Imperator]: *does not know either and is laughing at the wierd and bloody video*
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've seen that pic before.
2008-08-09 [Rainbow Dragonflies]: ... -tackles Mort-
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: hehehe


  

2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Beijing Olympics! ...U.S.A.! U.S.A.! ...*eats red, white, and blue noodles, not because of patriotism, but because my ramen is several years over the expiration date*... *finds a green noodle*...
2008-08-09 [Duke Devlin]: *smacks Mort* ... ... Looove youuu... XD
No but really. It's been too long since I graced this place with my presence, and I agree with Turkey up there! This is NOT usual BD banter! D: *misses OLD BD banter* .. :(
Oh wellz.
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*?!


Darn non-traditional Bob's Diner style comments... Now, where was I... U.S.A.! U.S.A.!
2008-08-09 [Duke Devlin]: Oh yeah! ... ... I can't even be bothered to ATTEMPT cheering for the U.K XD
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... If we don't win, then we're going to war with China...
2008-08-09 [nokaredes]: 2012 Olympics are in London, apparently. I think I'm going to try to go.
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't watch the Olympics.
2008-08-09 [nokaredes]: Me either, but I think it'd be cool to go and see the opening ceremony, and then be touristy. I've always wanted to go to London :)
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Must you say that on every wiki...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Are you talking to me or nokaredes?
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You...
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: What other wiki(s) did I say,'I don't watch the Olympics.'?
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Huggers United...
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh Wow that's alot isn't it?*is being sarcastic*
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course, that's the only wiki I've seen you say that on... there could, most likely, be more. So why did you deny it in the first place?
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't I just asked what other wiki you saw that on,and no there aren't others because other wikis are not talking about the Olympics.
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Why would you ask that question then? It's basically like denying it... *eats ramen*... and you have a track record of saying the exact same thing on numerous wikis...
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I don't.
2008-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, yes you do! ...*eats ramen*... *has witnesses*...
2008-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Name a time other than this.
2008-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in as a surprise witness*... I've seen her do it before too!
2008-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*I thought I locked you in my closet.
2008-08-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes... but it was actually your tool shed... which had a chainsaw in it... which I used... to carve a hole in the side of the shed... then I used some of the spare lumber you had in there and shaped a door... using spare parts I found laying around, I completed the hinges and placed a lock on it... I then proceeded to melt down a piece of steel... I fashioned the mixture into the right shape and made a key... using my new key, I opened the door I had created and made my fantastic escape. Yes, I know... I'm a genius...
2008-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Damn,I thought I took that chainsaw out,Oh well.
2008-08-10 [Imperator]: Has anyone heard about the Russian invasion of the nation of Georgia? 0.0 Shocking, but the news reports suggest the Russians are getting a bloody nose for it... Damn Russians. I hope they don't get any Olympic medals (and the U.S.A. gets them instead)!
2008-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: At least it's interesting to get to see what the Russian military looks like in battle...
2008-08-10 [Imperator]: Well those idiots at CNN aren't showing any cool battle footage, all they care about is the John Edwards affair (and no one gives a **** about that).
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid CNN... I guess I'll have to go over to Georgia myself...
2008-08-10 [Imperator]: I've been to Georgia. I went to the Six Flags in Atlanta and rode roller coasters.
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Me too. I rode every coaster there... I didn't see any cool military fighting though...
2008-08-10 [Imperator]: Damn Russians must be wearing camo... Damn Russians.
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I could have sworn I saw a few hiding behind the Batman ride...
2008-08-10 [Imperator]: Nah, that was just that teenager who dropped his hat and climbed over two fences into the coaster area to retrieve it.
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, okay then... but maybe the Russians were controlling the rollercoaster at the time?
2008-08-10 [Imperator]: OMG! Then that kid was an undercover CIA operative! How did those filthy Russians know?
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll bet Misty told them! Because she's a secret Russian spy!
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: We should have known... I mean, just look at that unibrow! It's so obvious!
2008-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not Russian you moron,and I don't have a unibrow!
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh no! It's spotted us! *dives for the bomb shelter*
2008-08-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: The Russian military is lame, though. America could kick their asses. I hope we do end up signing a treaty with Georgia, 'cause then we could invade Russia and own that country and all their vodka! And I might get to be one of those Soldiers to do it :)
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Send some of that vodka over here...
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: Only if you send me fireworks! ...oh... wait... I'll be leaving my county... they might be legal other places... so... only if you send me money! ...and ramen! ...and wasabi peas!
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! *sends you anthrax instead*
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: Are you going to kill yourself if you get investigated...?
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... *prepares cyanide pill*...
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: What outer coating are you gonna use?
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, I don't know... maybe a nice sugar based one... I don't want to have a bad taste in my mouth when I die...
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: Won't that kill you before you want to die? Don't you have to use wax or put it in the earpiece of fake glasses or something?
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe I'll use a nice polymer blend or... hey! Who says I'll get caught?! ...*sends you that anthrax*...
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: What's this about anthrax?! I thought you were sending me antrax!
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: 06:00:44 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! *sends you antrax instead*
2008-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare you falsify evidence?! ...that quote has clearly been tampered with...
2008-08-10 [Chimes]: Call the Jury! *suddenly has a judge wig and robe on*
2008-08-10 [whitehot]: JUDGE *shoots him* i couldnt let him know i stole his ramen....
2008-08-10 [nokaredes]: Yeah... tampered by you...
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Why have comments slowed again?! ...and why does China have more gold medals?!
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: And why did Jesus kill that fig tree?!
2008-08-11 [Chimes]: Maybe they slowed because it's less interesting? :P
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Your face is less interesting!
2008-08-11 [Chimes]: Yes. That's why I manipulate it. :P
2008-08-11 [Imperator]: China has more gold medals than us?! WHAT?! War! War! War!
*shakes pitchfork*
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Interesting... perhaps this here hammer can also manipulate your face... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Pitchforks don't work against China... rocket launchers, on the other hand... *gets one off the wall*...
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: They have six gold more than us! ...and two more medals overall! ...I'll bet they're cheating... I tried to ask if they were using steroids, but they just yelled gibberish at me... veeery suspicious... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-11 [Imperator]: Damn Chinese! They must be pretending to not speak English in order to avoid your question... But don't worry, Michael Phelps will win gold every swimming competition so we'll catch up.
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: He'll win every swimming competition... and then some! He might even win back some of the competitions we've already lost!
2008-08-11 [Imperator]: I know! He's just that good! Did you hear how the Frenchies talked bad about our swim team and then we beat them? That was AMAZING! We won by 8/100 of a second! AMAZING! God bless America! *sings Star-Spangled Banner*
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Take that, France! *cuts France out of all the maps I have*
2008-08-11 [Chimes]: .> *yawn*
2008-08-11 [Imperator]: Excuse me? "Yawn"?! Is that all you have to say for an amazing victory?
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Chimes is a terrorist!
2008-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! Bush is further provoking Russia! ...I'd like to see us storm in and beat up our old rivals... maybe drop a nuke or two... it's been a while since we've got to use those things...
2008-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: We do need another war... to help strengthen the economy... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-12 [Imperator]: I know everyone hates Bush but I like the man. He's got a spine and is a down-to-Earth guy. In this case, I think we can learn something from our ol' German buddy Adolf and how he built a ton of armament factories to employ people and to get ready for war. Killed two birds with one stone!
2008-08-12 [nokaredes]: The media is just being anti-Bush. He's only talking reality about Russia vs Georgia. Remember how Russia has been in Chechnya for ages, killing citizens...? Probably not. The popular media practically says nothing about it!
2008-08-12 [Paul Doyle]: Before you know it, Sylvester Stallone will make another stupid latter-day "Rambo" sequel, possibly co-starring George W. Bush. I didn't see the sequel that came out this year, but somebody said he looked like an overcooked Ballpark Frank.
2008-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... Frank....... the U.S. is back in the lead for medals!
2008-08-12 [Chimes]: Chimes is British, actually :P
2008-08-12 [Imperator]: We're behind China by only two gold medals!
2008-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Now we're behind by only six golds! ...but ahead overall... and McCain is only behind by five percent! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-12 [Paul Doyle]: Behind every male Olympic gymnast is another male Olympic gymnast. Just like how in the Winter Olympics how there's always a male figure skater behind another male figure skater :P
2008-08-12 [whitehot]: *eats ramen* spongebob should be president...... we are close friends... i could tell him to make ramen appear alot more in stores. *eats ramen more*
2008-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Spongebob should be president?!Spongebob is a child molester like Michael Jackson.
2008-08-13 [Imperator]: Spongebob is a fry cook and he wouldn't give up his job at the Krusty Krab even to be president.
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, Patrick on the other hand... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-13 [Imperator]: ...is unemployed and would take the job. I bet he would disguise himself as a man with gray hair and pretend he's from Texas. Oooooo! Burn on Bush! Actually, I really like Bush but it was a good burn opportunity.
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Poor Bush... he had the worst time in office... but it'll all be worth it... once he catches Osama! He's still got a few days left! He'll do it!
2008-08-13 [Paul Doyle]: Wait till Bush goes back to the bush league where he belongs, heehee.
2008-08-13 [Paul Doyle]: By the way Mort, I made a gigantic crock-pot batch of homemade chicken pasta sauce . . . and I'm just about out of pasta. Time to activate the ramen?
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Time to break out the hamburger meat!
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: http://images.google.com/imagelabeler/
2008-08-13 [iippo]: Nice link. 
2008-08-13 [Imperator]: Argh! Everytime I come here [Paul Doyle] talks about food and makes me hungry! *shakes fist*
2008-08-13 [iippo]: Well... it is a diner...
2008-08-13 [Imperator]: I don't see what that has to do with anything...
2008-08-13 [iippo]: You go to diners to eat. You don't eat unless you are hungry (or orally fixated like me... Or if you eat when you're upset...)
2008-08-13 [Imperator]: When I'm angry I don't eat because I'm defying the world or something so it makes me feel better.
2008-08-13 [iippo]: Huh. I usually feel worse when I haven't eaten.
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I eat because I'm a glutton... *eats ramen*... ha ha! Oral fixation... I don't care if it's a psychological term! It still sounds funny...
2008-08-13 [iippo]: -_- Your face sounds funny!
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Touché. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-13 [iippo]: Does it taste funny?
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, yes... I do believe it does.
2008-08-13 [iippo]: Huh.
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Indeed...... whoa! When did you get here, iippo...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-13 [whitehot]: *eats flamingo* needs something else.....*gets out ramen* thats better *eats ramen*
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: What did I tell you about stealing my ramen?! ...steal it from Nokaredes instead... she has better quality... *eats Nok's... "ramen"*...
2008-08-13 [whitehot]: i didnt steal this from you...there were some gopher banana ninja over there that i stole it from.
2008-08-13 [whitehot]: but ok *eats noks ramen*
2008-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *Nok runs out of ramen*... *stabs Nok in rage*... oh, wait... here's some more ramen! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-13 [whitehot]: yay *eats ramen*
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...You crazy mother fuckers!
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ?!
2008-08-14 [Paul Doyle]: Some of us can cook good, nutritious meals on the side, Impy. it saves a hell of a lot of money, and it tastes good. *eating freshly-made chicken chili, with chickpeas subbing for pinto beans, and extra amounts of green bell peppers/onions/carrots/onions/garlic enhancing the flavor and jacking up the potassium/vitamin/mineral quotient*


(Served over ramen w/o the salt packs, no less!)
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nice recipe.
2008-08-14 [Paul Doyle]: Yeah, it is good. I rinse dry peans and let them soak in a crock pot half-filled with water, onion powder, garlic powder, chili powder, cumin, black pepper, cayenne pepper, Italian spices, paprika and bay leaves. (No salt added at any point). Give at least 8 hours for beans to cook on "warm". As they expand they also absorb some of the spices' flavor. They taste ten times better than canned beans, which are way too salty and mushy. Then you add the veggies and chicken (skin and bones---if any---removed.) Add more cumin and chili powder and spices. Simmer on "warm" for at least 6-8 hours, then add tomato paste and more spices as needed (after doing a taste test).


Good stuff, rather easy to make, very healthy, and what I use (2 pounds of dry beans, maybe 2-3 pounds of boneless chicken, 2-3 carrots, 3-4 celery stalks, 2-3 bell peppers, 2 large or 3 medium onions, 5-6 garlic cloves, liberal amounts of spices) produces a big yield. It will fill a large crock pot nearly to the top. This stuff keeps for a few days in the fridge, for months when portioned-out and frozen.
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Very Interesting,if I knew how to cook I'd try that recipe.
2008-08-14 [Eloura]: *re-appears*
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi Eloura.
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Liberal amounts of spices?! ...stinkin' liberals! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-14 [Eloura]: Hi Misty! *giggles*
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: Oy, I won't have ramen much longer! You better not eat all of it!
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *is pale*... *pulls out some razor blades and sings a creepy song*... who wants a shave?!
2008-08-14 [Eloura]: *chis loudly*
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Shut it you Sweeny Todd wannabe.
2008-08-14 [Eloura]: *giggles more*
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweeny Todd? That guy sucked! ...I was going for Larry the Cable Guy there...
2008-08-14 [Eloura]: *laughs*
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well you suck at it.
2008-08-14 [dark starlight]: ily dustin.
2008-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who are you?
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: Wow, Misty's jealous... and she doesn't stalk you well enough! Even I know who [dark starlight] is!
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: ...I'm watching 1200 wiki! I pwn you, Mortimer!
2008-08-14 [iippo]: I love Larry the Cable Guy. :3
2008-08-14 [whitehot]: .........im hungry *eats iippo* he need salt.. anyone got some salt?
2008-08-14 [Mrs. No_One]: Hello,I have some.*hands [whitehot] some salt*
2008-08-14 [iippo]: You can't eat me, I'm a mormon :o
2008-08-14 [whitehot]: dang..........*eats mort* nyahaha
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: Don't eat Mortimer! You don't know where he's been!
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: ...and don't eat me. I'm all muscley and sinewy. You'd use more calories eating me than it's worth.
2008-08-14 [whitehot]: WHO DO I EAT THEN. oh i know.....
ME
*eats self*
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in*... stinkin' pope! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-14 [whitehot]: *eats ramen*




2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen better than you*
2008-08-14 [Chimes]: Someone's trying to steal your trait... Shocking. :P
2008-08-14 [whitehot]: *eats ramen even better than you* *explodes* *kills both of us
*




2008-08-14 [whitehot]: ive always loved ramen.....we just have the same trait :)
2008-08-14 [Chimes]: Ah, but Mort is infamous Elftown-wide for eating ramen.
2008-08-14 [whitehot]: *pokes chimes* *eats ramen*
2008-08-14 [Chimes]: *glances* *shrugs*
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: YoYoYoEmbryo! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]:




Yo


	2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: So that's what happens when you combine all the htmls... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: What happens, besides lameness?
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Large explosions?
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: Either it didn't work where I am, or I've gotten so used to accidentally blowing stuff up that I didn't even notice...
2008-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Both.
2008-08-14 [nokaredes]: How in the hell could it be both?!
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: If it's popsicle, it's possible! ...and it's most definitely popsicle... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-15 [nokaredes]: *licks your mom* Er, I mean! *licks a popsicle*
2008-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are a complete moron...
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh great... we had an intellectual conversation going and Misty just had to ruin it... thanks a lot!
2008-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your Welcome.
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: My welcome? What about it?
2008-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Moron.
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I'm not a Mormon! You take that back!
2008-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nope.
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Take it back! I'm a Christian, not a Mormon! Gosh! ...I'll have to open up a traditional can of Christian woop-ass on you! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-15 [nokaredes]: I wonder which of us she called a moron first...
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably... you!! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-15 [nokaredes]: What would the "traditional can of Christian woop-ass" have inside? Also, isn't it whoop-ass? With an "h"?
2008-08-15 [Eloura]: BOO!
2008-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Boo who?
2008-08-15 [iippo]: Don't cry Misty.
2008-08-15 [whitehot]: *eats ramen* that wasnt very nice.......*puts on angry face* YOU MEANIE!!!!
2008-08-15 [nokaredes]: ...the h2 tag is annoying...
2008-08-15 [whitehot]: sorry
2008-08-15 [whitehot]: ill fix it
2008-08-15 [whitehot]: hey i made a new prototype elftown chat http://xat.com/web_gear/chat/go_large.php?id=36120177    you dont need to download anything....its free....and......yeah
2008-08-15 [whitehot]: well if you want to use it anyways...
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: That thing's not the same as IRC... it's more like an MSN style chat room... *eats ramen*... *spits on your chat room*...
2008-08-15 [whitehot]: thats not nice.......*eats ramen* *spits in your ramen* nyahaha
2008-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... extra toppings...
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid Jason Mraz... he's only got like one good song... I should kill him.


(Note to future self: Kill Mraz)
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...okay, Bob's Dinerians. Here's the plan...


Step 1: End all of your comments everywhere with "*eats ramen*"


Step 2: Win over those in charge with subtle charms


Step 3: Drive away all opposition by means of constant bickering, fighting, and annoyance


Step 4: Send a check for $100 to the home of [Mortified Penguin]


Step 4: Take down the few in charge that you've won over


Step 5: Create a state of anarchy within the community


Step 6: Take over what remains of Elftown


Step 7: Rebuild




Alright... you got that?! Now go forth! ............suckers. *eats everyone's ramen while they're all gone*
2008-08-16 [nokaredes]: I would send you 100$, in December maybe, but I dunno your addy :P
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Only $100?! ...cheapo. Why don't you just hand over the cash whenever you come to Alliebama...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-16 [nokaredes]: ...okay :)
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: And give it to me in ones. Apparently strippers get mad when you throw quarters and half dollars at them...
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...when Achilles's mother dipped him into the river stix, why did she not flip him over and then dip his feet...? ...or, for that matter, why didn't she just dunk his whole body in along with her hands? ...she could have had an unstoppable son and invincible hands! ...stupid woman! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-16 [whitehot]: *eats ramen*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *dips whitehot into the river stix*... Woops! This is a volcano! ...uh... *glances around*... *leaves the charred body lying on the ground and runs away*...
2008-08-16 [nokaredes]: And why did shooting him in the heel, kill him? It's not like anything vital to living is there! I think they wanted to have a name for that one medical thing, is all...
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: If the story were more realistic, he would have fallen, got pissed, crawled toward the shooter, and dismembered him...
2008-08-16 [nokaredes]: Exactly... but then there would have been no moral to it... and all old stories have to have morals... otherwise it would have been unpopular and forgotten...
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: BOO!
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *stabs Misty*... whoops... well, I guess that'll teach you to sneak up on me! ...at least... it might have taught you... if I hadn't stabbed you right in the brain... oh well... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Remember, people! If you want a free Mort drawing and my password, then add something to that there contest up yonder! ...DUR HUR! ...*creepy voice*... fifteen days...
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *stabs Mortified Penguin back*Fucing Noob!
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I feel that I should point out a few mistakes in that sentence... however, as I don't really care and am currently doing other stuff... I won't. I'll let Nokaredes do it! Take it away, Nokar.
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nokaredes isn't on.Fucktard!
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: According to Elftown, she was on 27 minutes ago. My comment above was 35 minutes earlier than yours. Meaning, Nokaredes was on after I posted that comment.


And thirdly, stop your cursing!


And fifthly, as you may presently yourself be fully made aware of, both my math and my grammar suck.
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok then,weirdo.
2008-08-16 [nokaredes]: *is lazy* *does nothing*
2008-08-16 [whitehot]: *haunts mort forever moaning you killed me* *eats ramen*
2008-08-16 [Chimes]: <.< >.>
2008-08-16 [whitehot]: >_>......... /:3)----+----  
weird
2008-08-16 [Chimes]: *singing*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Sangin'?! We don't take too kindly to sangin' 'round hyuh! *gets shotgun off the wall*
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: Freedom! I am set free! You know, I used to think it would be fun to be a council lackey but they're all up-tight jerks and all you "rule breakers" and "harrassers" are much more pleastant and fun to be around.
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I should take offense to that... *eats ramen*... *takes out his rage on Misty's face*...
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: But you don't. Because you aren't an up-tight jerk. Or if you are you need to loosen your shirt collar.
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Shirt? Please... I don't wear one of those things... I wear this here tux. It's much better. ...*eats ramen*... *chews on a piece of hay*...
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: Don't chew on hay and eat at the same time... You could choke. *shoves hay down your throat*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: My throat! I need that for yelling at small children!
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: It looks like your face was attacked by small children...
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Exactly! ...that's why I always have to yell at them... *eats hay/ramen*... *small child walks by*... *punches him*...
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: Elftown Archives now features a link to Bob's Diner! Yay! *confetti everywhere*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Eggcellent... *eats ramen*... *confetti lands in his eye*... MY EYE!!
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: *small children attack your other eye*
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: Will someone send me an invite to Bob's Diner so I know what happens?
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *swats the small children away with a hammer*
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: *small children pelt you with rocks from a distance*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: F****** children! *gets an Uzi off the wall*
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: *children quickly scatter*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts up an electric fence*... That should take care of them for now.
2008-08-16 [Imperator]: *children bring out toy shovels and dump trucks and begin digging a tunnel under the fence*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it! Such good fence avoiding skills... they must be... Mexicans! (ha ha... self racism)
2008-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks toward Bob's Diner*... *walks into the fence*... *is shocked by this new landscaping feature*...
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! We caught one! *hog ties the turkey and hurls it into the freezer*
2008-08-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nooo! *starts clawing at the freezer door*... why do I always end up in here?!
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Because Mortified Penguin must like to throw you in the freezer,like the way he likes to talk about me when I'm not even online.*mumbles*Stupid Mortified Penguin!
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses Misty into the freezer too*
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh great.*sighs*
2008-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...*eats ramen*... *converts the freezer into an oven*...
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *drills a hole in the back of the oven and escapes leaving the Turkey behind*
2008-08-16 [Chimes]: [Imperator], did you give up being a Guide or did you get kicked off? O.o;
2008-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *appears next to chimes*
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: China's goin' down in them there olympics! ...*eats ramen the way God intended... with a fork!*... darn Asians... eating with sticks...
2008-08-17 [Imperator]: [Chimes], I resigned as you would see in the comment on Council. The entire council hates me, none of them wanted me in an official position, and for some inexplicable reason my comments on the nameless wiki were so under-appreciated that I will be banned if I offer any more. Hee hee! :D In fact, it's beyond me why they didn't just kick me off in the first place... Or gave me the position at all...
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]:                                                    
2008-08-17 [Imperator]: Whoa, how does that line thingy link to the nameless wiki? How do you know so many little tricks and loopholes in the Elftown code? lol
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That's my job. I still wish http://www.elftown.com/banned.html worked like it used to... and I wish I could still comment on wikis after the comment section had been removed... but nooo... once the guards found out, both were changed... there was some other interesting things I found out, but I can't remember them... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... I can't view the list of banned members anymore 'cause [Paul Doyle] reported one of Turkey's clones for linking it... I think it was [Panty Bandit]...
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I think the comment bug that allowed me to view and comment on wikis that had had the comment section removed was taken away because me and Turkey were commenting on index...
2008-08-17 [Imperator]: Ha ha ha! :D *gleefully claps hands*
2008-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Gooood times... Nowadays, it's too hard to find ways around things. Thanks for making Elftown safer, Hedda! Jerk! ...*kicks misty*...
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, Misty! *lights Misty on fire*
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*See even though I wasn't on you still mistreat me.
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course... It's funner when you don't talk back.
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*Well I guess you are better than Turkey he threated me in a message.
2008-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: I don't recall that... but it does sound like something I would do...
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh you don't?


From: [Sagacious Turkey]
To: [~Crimson Angel~]
Sent mail 2008-08-08 00:43:03
Message:


Riiiiight... I'm going to hurt you one of these days...
2008-08-17 [Imperator]: In bird language "hurt" is actually more along the lines of "hug".
2008-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: How dare you make up lies like that! Just for that, I'll hurt you one of these days...
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't think he meant he was going to hug me,he hates me and so does Mortified Penguin,I don't know why they do but they do.
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't make it up it was in my mail.
2008-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]:
From: [~Crimson Angel~]
To: [Sagacious Turkey]
Sent mail 2008-08-08 00:45:26
Message:


I eat children
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I never said that,you Ho Bag!*eats ramen*
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! That's some shocking evidence you've got there... We may finally be able to put her away for good!
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! Phelps won eight golds! Take that, Misty! ...you've never even won one gold... you loser... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Actually I've won two.SUCK ON THAT PENGUIN BREATH!
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Liar! Those were silver! *eats ramen*...
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: No they weren't.
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yes they were... they only look gold because they're stained...
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm going to go down on you and make you really happy
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: .............................................................
WHAT?!
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Then I want to come back up slowly and fuck you real good and hard.
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...again... WHAT?!! ...you'd frickin' flatten me!
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is laughing like crazy*Dude I wanted to freak you out AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...still... WHAT?!!?! ...*eats ramen*... *throws up a little*... *eats more ramen*...
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats shrimp ramen*WUZ UP MOTHER FUCKER?!
2008-08-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in*... *rips the door off the hinges*... *beats Misty with it, while mocking her for both physical and psychological pain*... This is the most wood you'll ever get! *swings the door*
2008-08-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *Laughs psychoticly*
2008-08-17 [nokaredes]: *isn't in the freezer/oven*
2008-08-17 [nokaredes]: Ha.. ha... remind me to never tell Misty where I live... she's kind of... creepy. Reminds me of the Joker from Batman!
2008-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! By the way, remember to never tell Misty where you live... *eats ramen*... *puts up a "Mission Accomplished" banner on the wall*...
2008-08-17 [HardRockAngel]: *is back and read about Pinguin wanting to throw her in the fires of Mt. Doom*
Hey! =O
2008-08-17 [Duke Devlin]: We're doing bizarrely well in the Olympics. oO
Also.. Misty.. That is the amazing thing about forums. A post can be seen for days.. or MORE.. after it has been posted.
2008-08-17 [whitehot]: *eats ramen* *explodes bobs diner*
2008-08-17 [Duke Devlin]: .. oh dear. D:
2008-08-17 [Chimes]: Oh yes...
2008-08-17 [Duke Devlin]: XD
2008-08-17 [Chimes]: *rebuilds it as a small hut, just 'cause*
2008-08-17 [Duke Devlin]: *rebuilds a BIGGER Bob's Diner right next door to yours, BIGGER*
2008-08-17 [Imperator]: *orders the We Are All Idiots Committee to check the small hut for building code violations*
2008-08-17 [Chimes]: Hey! I'll have you know that my hut is in perfect condition.
2008-08-17 [Imperator]: *hut collapses and kills WAAIC representative so no building code violations get filed*
2008-08-18 [Chimes]: It was soooo not enough to kill... also... their fault... they pressed the 'collapse' button. >.> <.<
2008-08-18 [Imperator]: Hmmmm. He must have been testing it to see if it met button regulation codes.
2008-08-18 [Chimes]: Ah, well... it did.
2008-08-18 [Imperator]: Clearly... And now I have to hire a new intern. Thanks a lot.
2008-08-18 [Chimes]: I could give it go. I would ask if a button is deadly before I press it.
2008-08-18 [Imperator]: Maybe I should just add into the building codes that deadly buttons are a safety violation...
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I fail to see how deadly buttons could possibly be considered a safety violation... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-18 [Imperator]: Maybe that's why your diner is the leading cause of death on Elftown.
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Second leading, actually... It's unfortunate, but Hedda kills Elftown's women at night...
2008-08-18 [nokaredes]: ...what?! *barricades things*
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh no! It's here! *points at a creature in the corner*... it's Hedda! (You know... If he were to come in here and read this......)
2008-08-18 [nokaredes]: He's too busy for that... I think >_> Besides, we can't be on the only wiki that mentions Hedda...
2008-08-18 [nokaredes]: Also, *ducks behind the bar*
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *Hedda prowls around*... *he lunges at Misty, but sees her in the light and is scared gay*... *eats ramen*... there's also the legend of the woman-killing-Pillowthief-monster... but it hasn't been seen in years and is pressumed dead...
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hedda sees all... he will see this... and he will unleash his wrath on you!
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: It's all good! I've got diplomatic immunity.
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Is that a disease?! ...stay away!
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *spreads diplomatic immunity*
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *idly scratches crotch*... *spreads peanut butter!!*...
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: McCain and Obama are still tied! ...and Huckabee's in the lead! ...okay, so he's behind by 103%, but he could still make a comeback!
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!!! Bill Richardson and Ralph Nader all the way!!
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nader had his chance in '04! He could have won too, if it wasn't for that puppy eating scandal...
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: And bring the huge @$$ Stickman compilation tomorrow! ...or just the Till Danderfluff manga...
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!!! Bring the un-recorded episode of Code Geass!
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Never! There was no new episode this week! There was only two old Shin Chans and the disturbing ATHFCMFFT movie... which I watched for some reason...
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Douchebag. Go in to medicine, darnit!
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Never! There's no way for someone in the medical field to advance in the political field! You go into law!!
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!! Only in medicine will you be able to advance in the true world. Politics are only a means to an end! It's only a facade!
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Please! What good will you be in medicine? The only people you'll help are low-lifes who will thank you, pay the bill, and forget you in a years time. The road of a politician is arduous, but worth it when your goals are obtained! You'll have power on a world stage. Your actions will be seen by everyone in the world! And your name will be permanently engraved in history...
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: For being the douchebag that led one country into another! Politicians are a dime a dozen. They're expendable and easily swayed! They cause chaos and destruction for no reason. Doctors, on the other hand, create hope and actually help people, unlike those idiotic politicians.
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Some politicians opt for peace, rather than war. And one way or another, politicians will be the ones controlling the world. I think it would be wise for you to invest in politics, because if you don't, then some deplorable war monger might seize power and cause this country to fall into ruin. If you've got a problem with the way things are being run... then take it over yourself.
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, brilliant. Heh heh...*contemplates massive wars*...
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! ...well, war does help the economy...
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: That's true. It also causes death, though...
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sometimes it saves more lives than it loses...
2008-08-18 [nokaredes]: I'm going into medical! Or maybe investigations. (Or maybe both... yay forensics!)
2008-08-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Investigations would be my second choice, because it just seems so fun...
2008-08-18 [Duke Devlin]: Forensics ftw.
But not over Criminal Psychology! ;)
2008-08-18 [Eloura]: I See A Bunny!
2008-08-18 [HardRockAngel]: *fries the bunny*
Hmm, bunnies =D
2008-08-18 [Chimes]: :O YOU CAN'T FRY BUNNIES!
2008-08-18 [Eloura]: *whimpers* bunnies! *pulls off my bunny hoodie*
2008-08-18 [whitehot]: BUNNIES *hides in hole* THEYRE GUNNA EAT ME
2008-08-18 [HardRockAngel]: *throws a dustbunnie at [whitehot]*
2008-08-18 [Duke Devlin]: *hides bunny-frying business behind B's D*
2008-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen... on a stick!*
2008-08-18 [Chimes]: The life of the wife is ended by the knife...
DUKEY! It's on again!
2008-08-18 [nokaredes]: Haha... dukey... it's slang for poo! And everything comes down to poo.
2008-08-18 [Chimes]: ... Right? O.o;
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *spontaneously combusts... on a stick!*
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *assaults a police officer... with a stick!*
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps your mother... with a stick!*
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *vialotates yo mama... with my "stick"!*
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: That wasn't nice! You're a... meanie-head! I'm so sorry... please excuse my fucking language... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Main_Page
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: That was quite evil of me... *with a stick*...
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah, what's wrong with you...? ...*beside a stick*...
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps you right up across the forehead... with a stick... of dynamite!*
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shoots you... with a gun, I mean, stick!*
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *obliterates you... with a broken X Box, I mean, knife!*
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://uncyclopedia.org/wiki/Harry_Potter_%28Books%29
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll fix that XXX-Box for only 25 bucks!
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *chokes you... with a STICK!*
2008-08-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: *moves 120 troops into Kamchatka... with a stick!!*
2008-08-19 [Keir Devlin]: xD Hahah. That is a cool picture.
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: XD That's GENIUS. And so damn right. oO
2008-08-19 [Chimes]: Lmao!
2008-08-19 [iippo]: 'With a stick' is the new 'your face.' *is hip and in tune with the current internet memes* Anyone seen the sneezing panda, by the way? That thing is so rad.
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't make me whack your face with my stick! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: XD OMFG.
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Those Chinese judges are obviously biased... that one Chinese chick even fell and she still got a higher score!
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: XD I haven't watched much of it today. XD Saw the diving though.
States was SOOOO far down on that one. XD But then, I don't think we even got on the board. :P
But a chinese man - Ho Chung won the Gold. D:
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn Asians... until the U.S. wins the olympics, I'm not eating anymore ramen!
2008-08-19 [nokaredes]: *hasn't watched anything but the opening ceremony* Apparently, some of the fireworks there were digital...
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I knew it! This means war...
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: XD OMFG You'll die, dear. *forces ramen on you* .. *to choke you* .. *cough*
Also.. REALLY? XD How unsurprising.. They put so much effort into the rest, surely it's a bit excessive to pay so much for loads of ridiculous fireworks? XD
2008-08-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I AM A SUPERSTAR WITH A BIG BIG HOUSE AND A BIG BIG HOUSE,i AM A SUPERSTAR AND I DON'T CARE WHO YOU ARE
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: XD That a song? *take care, I am not insulting you* XP
2008-08-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes it is,I find it funny actually.
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: What song is it? :D XD
2008-08-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am a superstar,want to hear it?It's mostly on AMV(Anime Music Videos incase you don't know what AMV stands for) but I think it's kinda funny.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d3urT9K0gaE
2008-08-19 [Duke Devlin]: Cool. :) I'll fave it and watch it tomorrow. XD =D
2008-08-19 [Imperator]: Bah. If you want good music you have to listen to Hannah Montana "Nobody's Perfect" or "Rockstar".
2008-08-19 [x-tacy]: what??? Hannah Montana....boooooooo...listen to Seether....
2008-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: The only reason "Rockstar" sounds good is because it sounds sort of like "Scotty Doesn't Know"... that and the guitar solo... er, I mean... I've never heard of Hannah Montana! NOOO!! *is carried away by the Manly Police*... *is forced to watch nonstop lesbo porn until deemed rehabilitated by a council of manly men*...
2008-08-20 [twitchboy]: guys come on, she is the next brittney spears and L. Lohan, teen star then anorexic drunk knocked up crack head.


i like the good music- linkin park, green day, december radio, my chemical romance, and the long gone trapt
2008-08-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELL YEAH!*hugs twitch*
2008-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: My Chemical Romance?! They only have two good songs! The rest is lame emo crap... same goes for Greenday...


If you want some good music, listen to Lynyrd Skynyrd, Aerosmith, Guns 'n' Roses, Foghat, The Bob's Diner Quartet... any of those!
2008-08-20 [twitchboy]: no arguement that they are good bands, but nu rockers may have only a few good songs but thay are great


p.s. i forgot plain white tees
2008-08-20 [Imperator]: The best music EVER though has to be Star Wars, no contest...
2008-08-20 [iippo]: Green Day had more good songs before they started wearing make-up. And it's Lynyrd Skynyrd. No As, all Ys. >.<
2008-08-20 [nokaredes]: What about Neophyte? And Hans Zimmer? Weird Al Yankovic?
2008-08-20 [Chimes]: O.o;
2008-08-20 [Duke Devlin]: Hans Zimmer! <3 Also.. Weird Al is great. :D
2008-08-20 [Chimes]: Hans Zimmer is Apollo in human form. One of the few. :P
2008-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in with a knife*... *robs the place and then runs*...
2008-08-20 [Paul Doyle]: I'd recommend the following, but I'm more likely revealing my age, more than anything else:


---Black Sabbath, either with Ozzy or Ronnie James Dio singing
---Ozzy Osbourne solo
---Dio
---Iron Maiden
---AC/DC
---The Police
---Metallica, pre-1992
---Rush
---Queen
---KISS albums from 1974-1977, 1981-83. The other stuff is mostly crap.
---U2
---R.E.M. until Bill Berry left.
---King Crimson, even their newer stuff
---Frank Zappa
---Peter Gabriel (especially his early stuff)
---Genesis, pre-1976 when Peter Gabriel was the lead singer and Phil Collins was the full-time drummer.
---Led Zeppelin. Except for "In Through the Out Door." o_O
---Beatles
---Rolling Stones
---The Who, until Keith Moon died in 1978.
---Pearl Jam
---Stone Temple Pilots
---Nirvana
---Soundgarden
---Living Colour
---Husker Du
---The Clash
---Sex Pistols
---Public Image, Limited (PiL). Early stuff is the best.
---Tool
---Cream
---Stevie Ray Vaughn
2008-08-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: What are you 35?
2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Heard 'em all...
2008-08-21 [Paul Doyle]: 34 ;-)
2008-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well I was close.
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: No you weren't! Shut up! ...*drinks Bailey's*... do you got the funk?!
2008-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...No
2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I've got the funk! ...And then I beat it up... with a stick!
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Would you like some smooth, creamy Bailey's?
2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I'd like some Bailey's... with a stick!
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *breaks a bottle of Bailey's over that Misty guy's head... with a... stick!!!!?!!!|!*
2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *launches a massive nuclear war against Africa which results in the deaths of millions of innocent people; the resulting nuclear fallout causes the mutations of billions of people around the world... on a stick!*
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *fakes a disaster involving an American tourist ship exploding off the coast of China, which results in a war with China, resulting in nuclear warfare, which results in billions of deaths, which leaves the two most dominate countries in the world in ruins, which causes other countries to fight for world dominance, which results in all out warfare, which results in the apocalypse, which results in all the ramen factories being wiped out........... with a stick!*
2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes back in time to meet the earliest human beings and teaches them how to read; over a small period of time, they gradually begin to grasp the concepts of nuclear physics and quantum theory; after their understanding, I introduce nuclear technology, which results in the exponential growth of a small civilization; millions of years pass (of course, I was too lazy to stick around and stay, so I travelled forward in time to the early 18th century!); what lay before my eyes was a smoldering pile of rubble and humanity; the human race had succumbed to the power of the mighty atom years before; the devastation and the horror that covered the earth-no, the entire galaxy (that's right, interplanetary travel was possible!)- foreshadowed the destruction of the universe's peace.............. on a stick!!!!!!!!!*
2008-08-21 [twitchboy]: *Chuck norris...thats all that needs to be said.......on a stick*
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *beats your face... with a stick!!!1!!1!!!1!2!!5!*
2008-08-21 [twitchboy]: *goes back in time before is hit and steals albert einstiens ideas and jacks the manhattan project hording alll the worlds nuclear weapons. Then simultaneously launches warheads on all the major capitals in the wprld causing mass disunion and anarchy. The civilians attack each other untill all that is left is me and a scared planet. Takes saved monkes and flies to mars to set up a biodome to start the process all over again.....on a stick*
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Why would they attack each other and not you?! ...with a stick!
2008-08-21 [twitchboy]: *in a secret bunker...and i have freakin nuclear weapons.....on a stick**set off planet killer(bomb strong enough to obliterate the earth and moon- and the size of a suitecase...on a stick*
2008-08-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: A stick...? That's not a safe place to keep your nukes! ...with stick!
2008-08-21 [Duke Devlin]: WE'VE GOT THAT UNDERWATER FUNK
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: O.o
2008-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: Weph... what have I told you about these random outbursts of yours?
2008-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...
2008-08-21 [Duke Devlin]: BOOSH
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: I said Boosh? Really?
2008-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: The U.S. is still is the lead with 95 medals to 83! Suck it, China!


http://www.onemorelevel.com/game/roadblocks
2008-08-21 [Duke Devlin]: Nope. :P I opened the page, and didn't reply for ages. XD
Obviously. :P
And shut up Misty. *stabs Misty*
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: Lmao... Hehe... the violence is funny - even to a non-violent person.
2008-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Happy Brithday,here's your present.*stabs Duke Devlin back*
2008-08-21 [Duke Devlin]: Oh shame.. You missed my birthday.. and my vital organs by the way.. by about six months. ;) *throws nuclear waste over Misty*
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: *is Dukey's cheerleader* *prances*
2008-08-21 [Paul Doyle]: I wonder how many medals China will eventually have to give up because of cheating with those underaged gymnasts? The story won't end with the closing of the Olympics.
2008-08-21 [Duke Devlin]: Hellz yeah. ;)
2008-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who cares?*pours gasoline on Duke and sets her on fire*
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: *Sprays water on Dukey, putting out the flames* HA!
2008-08-21 [nokaredes]: Don't you not do that for gas fires? Or is that grease fires? Or both? I dunno...
2008-08-21 [Chimes]: I have no idea... but because it was me that did it. It worked. I'm great like that - plus this is Bob's Diner... Misty never wins...
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Bitch.
2008-08-22 [twitchboy]: *lights go out as a single spot light centers on chimes and Duke and Misty. Sakura petals fall from the ceiling as Twitchs decends like an angel and roundhouse kicks the three to the face. Lands on his knee and looks up to reveil a rose clutched in his teeth* Violence is bad....no more fire
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: TWITCHBOY!*eyes flash red as I pounce on you*
2008-08-22 [twitchboy]: Whaa? Fine *hook punches chime* Better?
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes.*smiles and takes the rose*
2008-08-22 [twitchboy]: I like Duke...cant kick her twice
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *glares at Mortified Penguin for no reason*
2008-08-22 [nokaredes]: Mortimer, did you forget to pay the power bill again? And when did we get emergency lights in here? Or a tree...?
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I refuse to pay that darned power company!!
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *scowls*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Where's my money?! ...*aims a gun at Misty*...
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sticks out tongue*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots it off*
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grows a new one*That's not very nice.
2008-08-22 [nokaredes]: Have you met Mortimer before, Misty?
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Thankfully, no... *doesn't eat ramen*...
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gasps*He didn't eat Ramen...Oh Well.*eats Ramen*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe I already said... no more ramen until the U.S. beats those cheatin' Chinese!
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty kissed a girl and she liked it! ...of course... the girl she kissed wasn't as enthusiastic... she kept claiming she wasn't into bestiality... *eats pizza*...
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *a boulder suddenly falls through the roof, crushing the fat kid in the corner*... PIGGY!! NOOOO!!
2008-08-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn you, Ralph! Look what you've done! ...with a stick!
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Screw you, Simon! ...*eats Piggy*... mmm... bacon...
2008-08-22 [nokaredes]: Turkey's still playing with his stick I see...
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes and he likes it,it makes him really happy.  
2008-08-22 [Keir Devlin]: :D Hahah. Nice joke about Misty, Mort.
And the CHinese aren't cheating. :P you just say they are because you're a prideful American that can't except the fact that skrewed countries like China can beat us at things. :)
2008-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...*eats an orange in the corner*
2008-08-22 [nokaredes]: I bet it would make him happy :3
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Sickos! ...and the Chinese are cheating. The judges are biased. Like the one Chinese gymnist I saw... she fell on her landing after a bad routine and still ended up beating out the American chick's score.
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Then there was this other Chinese chick who fell off the balance beam and still managed to beat the hot Russian chick's score. And the Russian chick's performance was nearly flawless!
2008-08-22 [Keir Devlin]: Hey, darlin', guess what..?
The judges aren't all Chinese. ;D


Hahah. Lamo. And I saw it too. Reason she scored higher is because she did a far more difficult routine but failed the landing and the AMerican chick did an easier performance and didn't ad any trick's twists or spins in the air as she becan to land like the Chinese girl did.
If the Olypics were here in America and the American girl got higher than the Chinese girl and she had failed the landing, you wouldn't think anything about it. Want to know why?
Because you are bias.
2008-08-22 [Keir Devlin]: I do agree with the Russian team thing, because I do think something was off with that one. But I don't belive the CHinese are cheating.
I think were aren't thinking on the routines enough and noticing flaws in other groups instead in our owns and pointing them out and not bothering to mention our people tripped or something.
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: The audience there is mainly Chinese. I believe the cheers from them help to sway the judges a bit... *eats calamari*...
2008-08-22 [Keir Devlin]: :D CALAMARI!!! <3
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: And our people never trip! Don't make me send Phelps over there to hurt you!
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: It's... squidelicious!
2008-08-22 [Keir Devlin]: XD He's a swimmer. He doesn't walk around of do flips. He wouldn't care.
And see?
Bias people you are.
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe you're just biased against us over here...
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: I maintain that the only reason the Chinese are doing so great.. is that none of their teams are jet-lagged. :P
And I'll keep using that damn excuse til the end! Cause jet-lag TOTALLY lasts that long! >=D
Also.. *shoots flaming arrow at Misty* It's not nice to hurt people when they aren't around. ;) Doesn't it feel good to get your just desserts? ;) Freak. :)
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: I got kicked... when all I did was put the flames out... and speak the truth.
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Well, that means nothing to the untamed beast - Misty! For it holds no true feelings.. Which is exactly the reason we at Bob's Diner spend so much time hurting it. It doesn't even care. If you take no notice, that is.
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: Ah. That explains it. THE MYSTERY IS REVEALED!
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: I know.., I'm that good. ;)
Also, I miss B's D, so I have to spam my presence now. :P
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: Haha. Awesome!
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Quite. Quite right, my dear.
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: I have started college!
2008-08-22 [Keir Devlin]: :D WHEEEEE
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: CHA!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: College is fun ^^
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Good for you, El! :D
College is fuckign ACE.
Word of the day: ACE. :D
Except when you fail stuff. XD But that doesn't matter. ;)
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: It's fun so far! *bounces* Thank you Duke!!!
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the "exit only" door on the side*... this door clearly isn't working properly! ...*bursts back out*...
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *laughs at mortified penguin*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes in through the chimney, carrying an AK-49 (that's right! 49!)*
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear! They have been upgraded.. *trades Misty in for a new model, a less beasty one*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: They have those?! ...wait... why are we upgrading...? Who wants a Misty in the first place...?
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *giggles and sips at a drink*
2008-08-22 [nokaredes]: *chisels the "exit only" sign off the door*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *watches leasuriously*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts "exit only" signs on the outsides of the doors*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *throws a bowling ball knocking over a group a chickens and they all attack mortified penguin*
2008-08-22 [nokaredes]: *chisels the new signs off* *makes the doors resistant to glue*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes into a fit of 'roid rage and rips the doors off their hinges*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *applaudes mortified penguin*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *rips Eloura's arm off it's hinges also*
2008-08-22 [Imperator]: *bats Mort with Eloura's arm*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *squeeks and regrows and arm*
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Oh wait.. You're right, Mort. *throws Misty, all forms, out of high window*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *tackles a stuffed penguin*
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: *giggles*
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Oh noes! D: *strokes stuffed penguin* Meanie *smacks El*
2008-08-22 [Imperator]: *unleashes the hounds into the chaos*
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: *releases the killer Kittehs*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *laughs and curls up asleep hugging the penguin still*
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in, smiling and waving*... *suddenly pulls out a sword and commits suicide, samurai style*...
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... *pokes Chimes with a pokey stick*
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *snuggles the penguin more sighing happily*
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: ... Are you suggesting I am a Killer Kitteh now?
2008-08-22 [Duke Devlin]: Yes Yes I am.
2008-08-22 [Eloura]: *giggles in sleep*
2008-08-22 [Imperator]: *listens to Transformers soundtrack*
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: *writes, while being a 'Killer Kitteh' - apparently* :P
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I wish I was a transformer... then I could smash stuff! ...and drive myself to school everyday!
2008-08-22 [Imperator]: You could still do that last thing...
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, but not literally myself...
2008-08-22 [Imperator]: Why would you want to drive? Just fly there. Stupid. You can turn into a damn F-22 for heaven's sake!
2008-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...heck... why even go to school anymore? I could just smash the place!
2008-08-22 [Imperator]: The hords of teachers would come at you with their spanking rulers... Even if I was a transformer I wouldn't want to face that...
2008-08-22 [Chimes]: *hoards


I'm a living, breathing spell-check... Oh dear... =_=;
2008-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Those whordes!
2008-08-23 [Duke Devlin]: Me neither! :O
XD
I normally am too. <3 But I dun mention it to people. Or write properly..., on B's D. :P
2008-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: mee two! i cant stand it wen peepul mispel!
2008-08-23 [Duke Devlin]: XD Notice I how mispelt, did you? :P It was intentional. ;)
2008-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: four reelz? ...*eats pizza*...
2008-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *sits in his office*... *glances out the window*... Hey!! You owe me money! *gets a gun off the wall and starts chasing some ho's down the street*...
2008-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: FUCK BOB'S DINER AND IT'S PEOPLE!
2008-08-23 [Duke Devlin]: Well, you could try! But I don't think they'd let you, Mist!
2008-08-23 [Chimes]: Wow... that was vicious... with the caps and the swearing.
2008-08-23 [Imperator]: Puh-leeze [Duke Devlin]. I pride myself on excellent grammar and spelling. Don't judge me for one hastily written comment and a single spelling mistake with just a letter missing! *rattles pitchforks*
2008-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Eight more days, people! *steals a pitchfork*... *forks Misty's face*...
2008-08-23 [twitchboy]: Guys lets go back to the Olympics...i watched the wrestling part...and yes i may not be a star gymnist and not tell what routines are harder...but i have three state titles in wrestling and know what the hell is going on and i know a few u.s. competitors were a little on the short side when it came to calls from Chinese refs 
2008-08-23 [nokaredes]: *fails to enter*
2008-08-23 [Imperator]: It's a conspiracy! Down with China! Open the nuclear weapon caches!
2008-08-23 [Chimes]: Why'd you think she was judging you? XD


*rolls eyes*
2008-08-23 [HardRockAngel]: Belgium got a gold medal!!!!! Woo-hoo :P
China eat your heart out *ahem* xD
2008-08-23 [Imperator]: What [Chimes]?! Everything there has perfect spelling! Unless you're counting the accent mark that should be over the "e" in "caches"...
2008-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! No accent mark?! *gets gun off the wall*
2008-08-23 [Chimes]: I wasn't rolling my eyes because of that. :P I was rolling my eyes at the conspiracy theory...XD I find it funny.
2008-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *does drugs*
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Drugs? Who needs drugs? ............no, seriously... I've got some for sale...
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: People laughed at me when I joked that I chewed cocaine... But how should I know that's not what you do with cocaine?!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: There's this one weird (but hot!) chick in my grade that always corrects people when they talk about drugs... then there's this other chick (also hot!) that keeps talking about how fun acid trips are... *eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 Ashley: The Olypics Suck,and this Penguin Guy sucks Turkey's balls.and what the hell is this Duke Devlin thing,and who the hell is Misty?!
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Acid trips? Is that where you're in chemistry with a beaker of acid and you fall?
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Do I even want to know who the weird Ashley guy is...? ...*eats pizza*... *goes on an acid trip... to Europe!*
2008-08-24 Ashley: No.
2008-08-24 Ashley: I'm a girl Mrs.Penguin thing.
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuure you are... *eats pizza*... I see you killed the spaghetti monster... and his noodly appendages!
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Gah! The appendage really is gone! The We Are All Idiots Committee will investigate this crime!
2008-08-24 Ashley: That thing was an abomination.
2008-08-24 Ashley: I think the picture I replace it with is much better.
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We all love Jack Daniel's... but not at the cost of the dear spaghetti monster!
2008-08-24 Ashley: oops I left off the d in replaced my bad,oh well.
2008-08-24 Ashley: You can put it back up and keep that picture if you want.
2008-08-24 Ashley: Anyways some weird guy told me to come here,said it was the best place ever.
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Is Jack Daniel's a beer? It looks like it could be tea in the glass...
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Weird guy, huh? Was this guy fat... and ugly... and bearded... was it... MISTY?!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup... I suspect "Ashley" to be a Misty...
2008-08-24 Ashley: Who the hell is Misty?!No it was a guy name Dakota.Jack Daniels isn't bear hun it's a type of Whiskey
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!! *shrieks some more*
"Ashley" said "hun"! It's [Mordigen]!!! *runs away*
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup... she's Misty alright... case closed. ...*eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sticking with my assumption that it's that Misty guy...
2008-08-24 Ashley: This is me.



2008-08-24 Ashley: Who is [@12357]?
2008-08-24 Ashley: I say hun to everyone
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Lies! I know it's you, Misty! I can smell your stench!
2008-08-24 Ashley: So what's up
2008-08-24 Ashley: Whatever Freak.
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: So... "Ashley", is it...? Is this your first time visiting Elftown?
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: You look constipated... I'm sorry.
2008-08-24 Ashley: What does this Misty person Smell like?
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: hey i invited no one....and ashley must not have a account apparently....dude misty is a girl, why are you being overly mean?....no that is not misty
2008-08-24 Ashley: Yes it is.
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: Ashley what state do you live in cause you look really familiar
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: You know how a dead raccoon smells after being in the road for two weeks? That how she/you smell.
2008-08-24 Ashley: I said a guy named Dakota,that doesn't mean you Mr.twitchboy.
2008-08-24 Ashley: How many times do I have to tell you I'm not this Misty girl?!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yet, being your first time here... you seem to know how to post a picture to a wiki like any old Elftowner!
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: One more time and I'll believe you.
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude what the hell is going on here?
2008-08-24 Ashley: I'm on other website retard that you can post pictures on it like this.DUH!
2008-08-24 Ashley: Is that the Misty girl?
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh.....?
2008-08-24 Ashley: They have been talking about you nonstop,hun
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: 0.0
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Don't call me hun.
2008-08-24 Ashley: -_- Well sorry!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup... she's Misty... *eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever mother fuckers!
2008-08-24 Ashley: Wow this girl is so fucking rude,no wonder you guys hate her.*leaves the rudeness*
2008-08-24 Ashley: ok,I confess. It's me,Misty.
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: dakota is not a common name lol  oh well.....you never said which state cause there is a girl at my school that looks remarkably like u....or did misty steal the pic
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the Hell Ashley is not me dammit,Mortified Penguin I know you just did that so fuck off you fucking Butt Pirate!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What? Little old me? But our comments were only a second apart! ...it couldn't have been me! ...*eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: You're a filthy pirate hooker! Go back to your home on Whore Island!
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: hold a tic


05:13:40 blah:lll
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty's a nice, kind, respectable citizen.......... of Hookersville! *high fives some random guy*
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude I was outside getting the laundry in when that comment was made so it couldn't have been me.
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude I'm not a hooker.
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I guess you're right... hookers usually have to be good looking or else they don't get paid... *eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude hookers aren't virgins either you stupid mother fucking fag!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! You stole my other joke!
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: mort...lay off...and whoever is postin the fake ashley comments better grow up and apologize for stealing a pic of a friend of mine's
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: *drinks eel oil to get away from angry argument*
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! ...*eats pizza*...
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! That thing will give you internal hair!
2008-08-24 [Tates]: Did [Mortified Penguin] get his insults off a cereal box? Becasue I coulda sworn I read them one time..<.<"
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What kind of messed up cereal are you eating?! ...*eats pizza*... seriously... I want to buy that stuff!
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Cereal, pizza, or eel oil?
2008-08-24 [Tates]: I think it's called ASSHOLE.
And ya know..You ARE what you eat.
Have you has a few heaping bowls of it recently?
2008-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY! Thanks Holly!*huggles [Tates]*
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Ha ha ha! That was clever!
2008-08-24 [Tates]: *squiggles*
Thanks.^__^
*is huggled*
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: No... right now I'm just eating DRUGDEALER O's (every box comes with a free syringe!)... perhaps I should try this other brand...
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: guys shut the FUCK UP! and fess up who is postin the fake ashley posts? Cause they stole a classmate of mine's pick and im going to kick their ass....now FESS UP!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at Misty*... *who used to be Mister*...
2008-08-24 [Tates]: I heared they use the same chemicals as ASSHOLE in the DRUGDEALER O'S marshmellows. And the leprachaun that's in the comercials is gay..<.<"
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: All leprachauns are gay... that's why they're becoming extinct...
2008-08-24 [Tates]: It doesn't change teh fact that you're an ASSHOLE.
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: *snerk* I get it!
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: No, he's a penguin. And he's mortified that you would say such a thing.
2008-08-24 [Tates]: That he's an asshole?
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]:
ANSWER ME!!! WHO STOLE HER PIC!?!?
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in, staggering*... HEY! Where's that punk with my soy latte?! ...*grabs Misty*... you got my latte, boy?!! *swings a fist*... *collapses on the floor*... *foams from the mouth*...
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: First you said it "looked familiar" and now you're convinced you know them? What a leap... And I'm pretty sure that the pic would have to be posted by the owner or someone else who knows the owner... *cough*twitchboy*cough*
2008-08-24 [Tates]: Why're you so quick to blame someone else?
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: no i asked cause i knew it was a fake and was waiting for the imposter to slip up and make a mistake on one of my questions dumb ass...and the screen name didnt leave a link to the page
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm going to blame Misty for all of this... being Ashley and having something to do with twitchboy's mysterious rage... they are close friends... it's likely that she either put him up to this or is acting as him... as for [Tates], I suspect it's just some weirdo randomly stopping in... *eats pizza*... *starts foaming from the mouth again*... *flops helplessly on the floor*...
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Okay... so apparently she's not behind the mysterious rage of twitchboy's... but she is behind Terrorism! *points dramatically*... *the CIA, FBI, INTERPOL, NSA, and some guy named Steve burst in and tackle Misty*
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Where was the NAACP during all this?!
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: mort im mad cause i know the imposter stole the pic, if it was misty would i not be mad at her? hope you never become an investigator cause your bad at it


and since you are the one supplying the first and most theories you are making yourself seem suspecious 1. cause most of ashleys comments follow yours and 2. the guilty dog always barks first
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I have my own reasons for assuming knowing it's misty.
1. Ashley first appeared a few moments after Misty had logged out.
2. She only mentioned the names of the three people who constantly make fun of misty. Me, Turkey, and Duke Devlin.
3. Her style of writing is exactly like Misty's.
4. Misty has been know to come on here as someone else and then deny being that person.
5. Despite this being her first time on Elftown, she has already mastered posting pictures and linking usernames.
6. I'm never wrong.
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: six is shit, the rest is viable
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Six can't be wrong! Didn't you read it?!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Besides... when I pretend to be someone else...
2008-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...I do it with style.
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: no one is never wrong, thats just ego, the other five are beleiveable
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Leggo my Eggo- I mean, ego... *eats pizza*... (when are the stupid Olympics going to be over?! I'm tired of pizza!)...
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: Then what do you say about Bush?! That's right, he's never wrong either so that proves you're wrong and Mort is right.
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: that was stupid and irrelivant, i am a bush supporter...but the said nuclear wrong
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: You support Bush! OMG! *faints with happiness mixed with shock*
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe he said 'nuclear' right and eveyone else has been saying it wrong all along!
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: no, mort you can be wrong...get over it...i was wrong once, i thought you were straight  


lol jk
2008-08-24 [Imperator]: There are some absolutely hilarious youtube videos of things Bush has done and were caught on camera. I love that man. If only I were gay and about 4 times my age we could've had something...
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *laughs maniacally* Ha ha ha ha ha ha!! ...*slowly reaches for a gun on the wall*...
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Bush gave that German lady a back massage that time!
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5dfrHT8o-0A
2008-08-24 [twitchboy]: well night guys...still gonna figure out who stole pic
2008-08-24 [whitehot]: *dies* TO MUCH CONVERSATION!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
2008-08-24 [HardRockAngel]: *walks in with two swords*
May I ask Penguin and Turkey a question? >=)
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: No, but I think you will anyway... *eats pizza*... so what's yo question?
2008-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Don't ask about asking a question and then disappear!
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*Sup [Mortified Penguin],Or should I say Mr. Butt Pirate?
2008-08-25 [Tates]: You stold that from me!!Only I can call people Butt pirates!!!
*waits* [Mortified Penguin] You're a butt pirate..<.<"
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: You people seem strangely obsessed with that same insult... perhaps it's something deeper? I suspect it's a psychological problem. *pulls up a massive bed*... Here, Misty... lie down and we can discuss the problem and maybe work out a solution. Now... how is your relationship with your father?
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *jots down a few things in a notepad*
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: My father is sometimes an asshole,but he's not always and when he is he is not as bad as you,you're always an asshole
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... you seem stuck on that word... "asshole". Perhaps you never fully matured through the anal stage of your infant life? So tell me... are you a retarded, alcoholic, hermaphrodite and/or do you sometimes have dreams of making out with retarded herms?
2008-08-25 [Tates]: Maybe her father just liked the cereal..<.<".
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... it seems Misty had a big heapin' bowl full of    for breakfast... *eats pizza*...
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! The olympics are over and the winner overall was........ the U.S.! .............*finally eats ramen again*... *tosses pizza out the window*...
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats victory ramen with red, white, and blue noodles*
2008-08-25 [Imperator]: But the damn Chinese won more gold medals than us. >:-(
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Only because they cheated. Besides... we've got more golds than anyone else overall from past olympics! ...second place is the USSR... but hopefully they won't be back anytime soon to challenge us again... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Okay... so I was driving to the mall, right? It took me half an hour to get there and when I finally did... I realized I left my car keys at home. So then I had to drive all the way back home to get my keys, so I could start my car... I searched and I searched... I eventually found them in the car for some reason... I got so mad, I threw them on the ground! I eventually made it back to the mall, only to realize that I had left them yet again! Since it would have been impossible to drive home without them, I had to drive all the way home, get the keys, drive back to the mall, put the keys in the car, and then drive back home again... *eats ramen*... *swears that he isn't on drugs*...
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ................I wonder how much the mafia pays........? *eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: We pay in stocks. That's right! The Mafia has stocks.
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... socks...
2008-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pulls out an uzi!*
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*pulls out a... Floozy!*...
2008-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Put that Misty back! You don't know where it's been!
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: It's been in the toilet! ...just like my finaces! *debt collecting rhinos burst in*... *runs for it*...
2008-08-25 [iippo]: *sits in a jacuzzi* That's right, the mafia has jacuzzis.
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Stolen jacuzzis! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [Chimes]: THE EYE OF THE TIGER
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: When most people see an endangered species, they think... "Aw... there's not many of those left... we should help them."... when I see endangered species, I'm like... Sweet! I better shoot one of those, before they run out of 'em! ...I hope one day to have a wall full of stuffed, endagered animal heads... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not Emo,and by the way you could have eaten Ramen this whole time because Ramen is from Japan.
2008-08-25 [Chimes]: ...You can buy Ramen anywhere... >.>
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know but it came here from Japan.
2008-08-25 [Chimes]: Yeah, so? Plus, everyone knows that.
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Ramen originated in China... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen* So what,you could still have eaten it.
2008-08-25 [Chimes]: ... He does eat it. O.o;
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Now I do... but I ate pizza instead for about a week... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [Chimes]: Pizza is good. :]
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: So's your mom! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: MENTOS THE FRESH MAKER!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3b2t6e0xwjo&NR=1
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Darn product placements... *drinks Dr. Pepper!*... mmm! A smooth blend of 23 delicious flavors!
2008-08-25 [Chimes]: O.o;;;;
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: What...?
2008-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Nothing... *eats Doritos!*...
2008-08-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats ramen*
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: That Sara guy just logged on... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Your mom just logged on!
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn... that Sara guy just logged out... if I have to tell her one more time to eat at Bob's Diner, so help me! ...*gets mace off the wall*...
2008-08-26 [nokaredes]: Ha! Mortimer has broken himself of that nasty ramen addiction!
2008-08-26 [Imperator]: I see your face hasn't broken itself of its ugliness.
Oooooooooo! BURN!
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh no I haven't! I'm still hooked on the stuff! ...*snorts ramen*...


But, yeah... this is an intervention, Nokaredes. Your face needs to break that ugliness addiction. We've gathered your friends, family, and Misty to help you. Well... not so much Misty... she's just here for the free hors d'oeuvres...
2008-08-26 [nokaredes]: That was a lame insult, [Imperator]... I need higher quality from B's D's visitors!
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: We used them all on Misty! We can't help it!
2008-08-26 [HardRockAngel]: Here comes the question: Why do you bug Misty that much? >=/
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: It's fun.
2008-08-26 [Paul Doyle]: Ooops, I just logged on. ET is in for it now. Mwahahahah!
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! McCain is ahead of Obama by 2% now!
2008-08-26 [Chimes]: AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH POLITICS! *runs away*
2008-08-26 [Paul Doyle]: I don't know what's worse right now---the US economy, or our wonderful presidential candidate selection?
2008-08-26 [twitchboy]: vote paris hilton
2008-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: She's a better candidate than Obama! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-27 [whitehot]: *eats ramen* best game ever http://notdoppler.com/tangerinepanic.php
2008-08-27 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Paris Hilton has huge feet.
2008-08-27 [Chimes]: She does?
2008-08-27 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Yeah, my friend was looking at pictures of celebrities the other day, and we noticed it. At first I thought it was the way the camera was angled, because she was sitting in a chair. But on the red carpet, standing up, her feet were just a big looking. XD
2008-08-27 [HardRockAngel]: If maiking fun of others in fun to you, then you, "dear" Penguin are pathetic >_>
2008-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: What's your goal here, HardRockAngel? What are you hoping to achieve? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-27 [Duke Devlin]: I dislike how this place is going! D: Where have all of the random shootings gone? :( *sniffle-cry*
Also.., Shut up Imperator. Everybody dislikes you. =]
2008-08-27 [Chimes]: Ooooo~ Ruthless. :P I like it.
2008-08-27 [Duke Devlin]: Damn straight! :D That's how B's D has got to stay! D:
2008-08-27 [Chimes]: XD
2008-08-27 [Duke Devlin]: !!!! D: >=D Gotta keep it baddd. XD
2008-08-27 [twitchboy]: Ok...yeah this is drole *Breaks out light saber and decapitates the others* There can only be one...wait ...wrong movie
2008-08-27 [Chimes]: OH NOES
2008-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *plays with his privates*... man! These new toy soldiers are great! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-28 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *headless* Well... this is is interesting.
2008-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *duct tapes your head back on*
2008-08-28 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Thanks so much... I appreciate that, but did you really have to use the bright orange duct tape? ^^;
2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in and kicks Inazuma's head off, soccer style!*... *the head lands in the toilet*... *a loud voice from nowhere screams "goooooooaaal!"*
2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: CB5, you ugly douches! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-08-28 [Duke Devlin]: Nahh man, effort.
2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Good point... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-28 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *drowning* Gluuuubbuubble! *body walking around aimlessly*
2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: The platypus is one messed up animal... duck bill, beaver tail, fur, poison flippers... *eats platypus ramen*...
2008-08-28 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: What? Liquid Chuck? Is he like Liquid Snake?
2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps... but for copyright reasons, we at the Bob's Diner Corporation like to downplay the resemblance to any Hideo Kojima creations. ...*eats ramen*... *shoots Ocelot*...
2008-08-28 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I kinda liked him. *lifts hands up... shakes head a bit... and points at Mort with index fingers out, and thumbs up.*
2008-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: She's got a gun! *cops burst in and beat [Khronos Atmosphaera] with clubs*
2008-08-28 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Frikin A... *getting beat up*
2008-08-28 [Duke Devlin]: I know. I always have good points. >=D
2008-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *saves Tenshi then disappears*
2008-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I wonder if post-op trannies experience phantom third-leg... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: That's right! Till Danderfluff was finally edited! ...slighty... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-29 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *saved* Dx! Thanks so much! Ebil coppers!
2008-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: McCain chose Sarah Palin as his VP! ...so now, depending on who we vote for, we'll either be sexists or racists... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, that contest ends tomorrow... and it'll be Bob's Diner's 4th anniversary... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! Second best year ever!
2008-08-29 [nokaredes]: *is racist*
2008-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Good choice.
2008-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Why, Misty... that banner seems to suggest that we don't have lights here... that is simply not true! We've got that one light... in the bathroom... *gropes around in the dark*... *gropes random chicks*...
2008-08-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well at least I put a banner up,nobody else did.
2008-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... I'm a racist too! ...three thousand Asian children died to make this ramen... *shrugs*... *tosses the ramen in the garbage*... What? It was almost getting close to being cold... sort of... *fixes a new bowl of ramen*...
2008-08-30 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: o_o;
2008-08-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?
2008-08-30 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I have no idea whats going on! =D!
2008-08-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: oh lol
2008-08-30 [Chimes]: Lol.
2008-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in playing a mad tuba solo*... *breaks the tuba over Misty's head*... *burns the remains of the tuba*... *eats ramen*... I think Misty won that contest up there... she will be receiving her prize in 5 to 9 years...
2008-08-30 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: o_o
2008-08-30 [Keir Devlin]: xD WTF Mort?
2008-08-30 [Duke Devlin]: I haven't even got around to it yet. XD I'll have one up before I start college again. XD Shame I've missed the deadline. :P
2008-08-30 [Chimes]: Heh... I was considering it too... :P
2008-08-30 [Duke Devlin]: Oh well. :P We have.. this evening to do so. XD
2008-08-30 [Chimes]: We do... but I'm tired... I didn't sleep.
2008-08-30 [Duke Devlin]: Fair point! D:
I cba. Also I have to go. XD
2008-08-31 [whitehot]: :( my dad is moving away.......... *eats sad bowl of ramen*
2008-08-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: awwwwwwwwwwwww...*huggles whitehot*
2008-08-31 [whitehot]: *inches away* *huddles up in corner* *dies*.....its sad i know
2008-08-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Don't die.
2008-08-31 [whitehot]: fine *injects self with life*
2008-08-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-08-31 [whitehot]: :( he's moving tommorow
2008-08-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sorry to hear that.
2008-08-31 [whitehot]: thanks
2008-08-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your welcome.
2008-08-31 [Duke Devlin]: I'm sorry to hear that your father is moving away, [whitehot]. It really is a shame. *genuine sympathy*
So.., how's it hanging?
2008-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Way low and to the left... *eats ramen*...
2008-08-31 [Duke Devlin]: Wow, how nice for you. ;)
2008-08-31 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Omg... xD
2008-08-31 [Eloura]: *eats a home made brownie*
2008-08-31 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *eats blueberry flavoured chapstick*
2008-08-31 [twitchboy]: *eats shrimp ramen* ....blah
2008-09-01 [Eloura]: *dies of homemade arsenic*
2008-09-01 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Dude that sucks.
2008-09-01 [Eloura]: *floats around* I know *voice wavers*
2008-09-01 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Dx... *looking around*
2008-09-01 [Imperator]: I'm lobbying in the suggestions forum for the addition of an "unofficial badge box"! Go and support the idea so you can put your Bob's Diner badges in it!
2008-09-01 [nokaredes]: Why don't you just put that in your description?
2008-09-01 [HardRockAngel]: Because the amount of images is limited =S
2008-09-01 [Chimes]: But then if you donate you're allowed to put more images in your description.


Also... [Imperator]... that might not be such a good idea... you'll end up with people having hundreds of badges in there and then elftown will load reaaaally slowly and with the varied size of badges it'll probably end up looking ugly. >.>
2008-09-01 [Chimes]: 


By the by... Mort... why don't you just use the little badge thing from 'The other half' as a banner.
The one in this comment.
2008-09-01 [Duke Devlin]: I agree. I like that banner. D: Also, [Chimes] is right on that front, Imperator. >=D
2008-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: The amount in the "unofficial badge box" can be limited as well. And to keep things that aren't even badges out, they could set size limits... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-02 [nokaredes]: Size limits might accidentally affect things that are bigger in kb because they have many colours, or are in different format (png vs gif, etc)...
2008-09-02 [Eloura]: could be interesting though
2008-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Tonight we dine... at Bob's Diner! *fights off some invading Persians*
2008-09-02 [Duke Devlin]: *throws a morrocan at the Persians*
2008-09-02 [whitehot]: *dances*
2008-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *watches as I float above you all*
2008-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: There seems to be a weird creature floating in my airspace... *gets a rocket launcher off the wall*... *fires it, but misses*... *the stray bullet takes out a passing 747*...
2008-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs like a madwoman on crack*
2008-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yes... "like"... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *sets up some turrets on the outside of the diner*... *the guns start cursing loudly*... what?! I order turrets, not turets! *calls the company*
2008-09-03 [Duke Devlin]: *shakes head* Well, That's pretty awful thar.
2008-09-03 [nokaredes]: That'll work, too... especially if they still shoot...
2008-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: They work, but even if the IFF is on, it'll still shoot/curse at friendly targets at random... *eats ramen*... *all turet turrets turn and fire at Misty for no particular reason*...
2008-09-03 [HardRockAngel]: *RPG's Penguin*
=P
2008-09-03 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Deys alotta cap bustin' goin' on up in heere...
2008-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid Marx brothers... "Don't drink that poison! ...It's four dollars an ounce!"
2008-09-04 [Paul Doyle]: I blame Richard Marx, above the rest of them. What a mullet-munching dork :P


. . . And Karl Marx, for being irrelevant in 2008.
2008-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: So many different Marxs... and yet... I hate them all... except Groucho... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: So what do you disgusting losers think of Sarah Palin? Other than her obvious greatness, what else do you love about her? ...I know a Huckabee/Chuck Norris option would have been better, but McCain/Palin still beats Obama/Biden anyday... *eats ramen*... *does typical stupid stuff*...
2008-09-05 [nokaredes]: ...I'm annoyed at the press' treatment of her. I like her, though, 'cause so far the only issue (that I've heard her opinion of) that I disagree with her on, is civil unions for gays.
2008-09-05 [Paul Doyle]: Randomly idle, silly thought while driving home from work in the pre-dawn darkness, while watching out for deer and listening to "10,000 Days" by Tool:


"Is there a weird Led Zeppelin tribute band out there called Led Zeppo-lin, with dudes dressed up/made up like the Marx Brothers? Groucho as Robert Plant, Zeppo as Jimmy Page (after all, Page was Led Zep in a nutshell, and so Zeppo must be Zeppo-lin in a nutshell), Harpo as John Paul Jones, and Chico as John Bonham."
2008-09-05 [Paul Doyle]: This is my opinion, written when I really should have been doing artwork, but yet I couldn't help but spout. Most of the time I'm fairly apolitical:






In a nutshell, I'm a political independent with a tendency to vote Republican (but not that strong a tendency!) and I believe Sarah Palin equals doom for the McCain ticket. There are plenty of other Republican women out there who aren't such blatantly polarizing holy rollers: Elizabeth Dole, Christine Todd Whitman, heck even Jodi Rell the governor of Connecticut (my state) and Mary Matalin!


Anyway, my diary's double-posted, but comments are welcome.
2008-09-05 [nokaredes]: I'm sure there are plenty of Christians, and other people who believe in God in their religions, who don't mind her being as religious as she is. I know I don't.
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*... Bush rules, man! ...where's everyone at these days...? Do I need to go spam Bob's Diner some more...?!
2008-09-05 [nokaredes]: I got kind of busy all at once. I have two commissions to draw, two rpg to make characters for, and a webcomic I'm trying to start... Also I have been dogsitting for three dogs... >_< I've been trying to keep up with politics and at the same time as all that, hang out with people who say they think I am avoiding them. Stress, overwork, and an early death, here I come!
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Excuses! Bob's Diner must always come first! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-05 [Chimes]: PAH! :P
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets gun off the wall*... that there was the last 'pah' you'll ever say. *approaches threateningly*
2008-09-05 [Chimes]: You don't want to be doing that. I mean being a reviewer for The Town Herald I could review this, here, wiki and get you more views, maybe. If it somehow fits into one of the themes. It won't fit into the current one though.


Plus... if you kill me the world will explode. It's the side effect of ending my existance. I have to be here, you see.
*grins*
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... *severely wounds you, but doesn't kill you*... now we're all happy! ...and Bob's Diner can fit into any type of theme... Overcoming adversity? You bet! Sci-fi? Sure! Democratic liberals? No so much... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-05 [Chimes]: How about 'Zodiac'? :P


I AM ALIIIIVE!
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, sure! We're all basically symbols of the zodiac here! I have Cancer, Nokaredes has Capricorns on her toes... Misty's a Virgo and always will be... then there's that Sagittarius Turkey guy... who is actually a Pisces... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-05 [Chimes]: Ah, but the review wouldn't be of the people - it would be of the wiki.
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, but Bob's Diner is a wiki of and for the people. The people here are what made the wiki. So... oh, screw it... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-05 [Chimes]: :P I may get round to it one day...
2008-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, darn my socks... *eats ramen*... *whittles tiny voodoo dolls*...
2008-09-06 [Chimes]: O.O' Better not be of meee.
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *whittles a tiny chimes*... *pokes it's eye*...
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *whittles tiny lions and places them around the tiny chimes*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...elftown memes!
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: It looks like someone whittled your face! Oooooooooo! BURN!
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: My face isn't whittled! *wooden jaw falls off*... ignore that... *scratches nose*... *wood chips fall off*...
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: *casually opens bottle of stump rot*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... stump ro- AAAAH! *termites crawl in and out of my ears*
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: EWWWWWW! I hate creepy, crawly insects! *gets out flame thrower*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...flamethrower? Whatever does that d- NOOO! *bursts into flames*
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: Ohmygosh! I've killed Mort! ... Again? *remembers throat slicing*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *is a pile of ashes*
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: *lets you die with sword in hand so you will go to the beer hall of Odin and Thor in the afterlife*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *sees people get turned away at the gate*... "I'm sorry... Samurai swords don't count."
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: You're a Viking from Denmark. How in the name of Zeus did you get to Japan?
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Viking airplane?
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: *imagines Viking war ship with jet wings on the sides...*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: And a bunch of slaves flapping the wings like giant paddles... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-06 [Imperator]: And an Imperator at the helm wearing gleaming armor and sword held high!
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I see you online, but not commenting, Nok!
2008-09-06 [nokaredes]: I hadn't gotten around to it yet, smart one... I was looking at some geek wiki...
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: What did I say about excuses?! *punches Duke Devlin in the back of the head for no apparent reason*
2008-09-06 [nokaredes]: You said as long as they're awesome, they're allowed :)
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... that doesn't sound like something I'd say... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-06 [nokaredes]: Maybe it was one of your many impostors...
2008-09-06 [Chimes]: Or someone from his adoring fanclub. >.> *cough*
2008-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen... one... noodle... at... a time...*
2008-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...The Domino's guy ran over my puppy! ...and after I'd given him a ten dollar tip too... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-07 [zankou]: just curious, but why was i invited? i dont usually get invitations....
2008-09-07 [Imperator]: Because Bob's Diner accepts all walks of low-life. Including you. Ooooooooo! BURN! I'm sorry, that was a particularly mean burn. Usually they don't get that bad so I take it back...
2008-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the chickens crash in through the ceiling and carry Zankou away*...
2008-09-07 [Chimes]: Your 'burns' aren't very clever. :P
2008-09-07 [nokaredes]: *remembers the chickens nostalgically*
2008-09-07 [Chimes]: O.o;;
2008-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Weren't those chickens supposed to get married to Gothic Yoshie...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: McCain is up by five... *eats ramen*... *reads some dead baby jokes*...
2008-09-09 [nokaredes]: Where are you getting your statistics information...?
2008-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: www.gallup.com ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-09 [iippo]: Is that the Gallup in New Mexico?
2008-09-09 [Paul Doyle]: . . . or is "Gallup" something horses do at a medium pace, in illiterate areas of the English-speaking world?
2008-09-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Gallop... is a horse trotty thingy.
2008-09-09 [Chimes]: He knows... hence the bit about the 'illiterate areas of the English-speaking world'. :P
2008-09-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Ah... omg, I'm so slow. Dx... I see that now. x_x
2008-09-09 [Chimes]: Hehehe.
2008-09-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: ^.^!
2008-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kills a homeless guy for fun*
2008-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *is shocked*... *shock subsides*... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I shocked your mom last night... with the shocker!
2008-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Awesome!... *awsomeness subsides*... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: I subsided your... mom... last night... *eats your mom*... gross! *spits it at Misty*
2008-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Gosh! *eats tater tots from his pocket*
2008-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *writes an essay* Does anyone know another word for "douchebaggery"? I don't want to have to use it three times in the same sentence... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-11 [Imperator]: Um... Dang, that's a tough one. Do you know a shorter word for "intercourse"? I'm... writing an essay too...   
2008-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... intcor, maybe? I don't know... *eats ramen*... *shoots at random people in a crowd*... You live! You die! You live! You die!
2008-09-11 [nokaredes]: ...if you're not on the Main Core list yet, I'd be very surprised...
2008-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sure I've been on that thing for years... *eats ramen*... *does terrorist activities*...
2008-09-11 [HardRockAngel]: *wonders what [Mortified Penguin] is doing*
2008-09-11 [Imperator]: *holds up sign saying "terrorist activities"*
2008-09-11 [nokaredes]: You've been watching too much Ranma and/or Looney Tunes.
2008-09-11 [Imperator]: OMG! I hate Cartoon Network because they don't show Looney Tunes anymore! All they have now are these stupid Japanese fighting shows where people act dramatic and get punched. I want to see a rock chucked at Fudd!
2008-09-11 [Imperator Alexander]: I am an Imperator.
2008-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: What about Chowder and Flapjack?! And, to a lesser extent... Total Drama Island?!
2008-09-12 [twitchboy]: tdi is awsome....watchin it now
2008-09-12 [Paul Doyle]: Hopefully the "S.S. Minnow" doesn't crash there. it'll be like "Gilligan's Island" from the nether bowels of Hades.
2008-09-12 [Imperator]: Well, I do really like Flapjack. It has similar humor to Spongebob Squarepants. That's probably why. :P
2008-09-12 [HardRockAngel]: *looks around with a "what-the-...-are-you-guys-talking-about???"-expression*
What is "S.S. Minnow"? o.O
*feels silly for not knowing*
2008-09-12 [Paul Doyle]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qH1UdnZfYh8
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmmmmmmmm...I see you still hit me and spit at me when I'm not here,and by the way I'm a Scorpio not a Virgo.
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *spits on you*... so...? I spit on/at you no matter where you are at the time... I'm that good.
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
Ya know...


People like you are the reason why
people like me need medication....
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! You take medication! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Because of you.
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: How would you know...? ...you're probably whacked out on meds... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: no i'm not.
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuure... just deny it... druggy! ...*eats ramen*... *snorts cocaine*... you disgust me!
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2008-09-13 [nokaredes]: I probably need medication... but do you see me on it?! No! Why not, you might be asking... Because I am better than you, Misty! Do you hear me? I AM BETTER THAN YOU.
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't give a shit if You think that you are better than me,nokaredes.
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You people are fun... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: *waves a white flag*
Can we please behave like adults and stop making someone feel miserable?
Sheesh, is that so much to ask for?! >_>"
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes your white flag*... *stabs it in your eye*... yes... it is too much to ask for. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: *shakes head* So childish
*yoink*
Ramen is mine now =D *eats ramen*
2008-09-13 [Keir Devlin]: xD Aw, Misty need medication..? How saaaaaad.
xD


Overdose. <3
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Overdosing is always fun... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: Thank you for handing my wiki over.
But please don't do this -EVER- again!
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... whatever you say, crazy lady... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *rolls eyes*Whatever Keir Devlin,whatever.
2008-09-13 [Chimes]: *Keir


This being the internet and all... people shouldn't get so offended.
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not offended.
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: I was mad, not offended.
There is a difference. =p
2008-09-13 [Chimes]: You seemed offended. >.>; Or at least troubled by it...
Key thing to remember: this is the internet.
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: Yeah, but he took over my wiki.
Be it briefly, I still didn't like it >_>
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I never took over your wiki... it only seemed as though I did... because... you're taking the same drugs as Misty! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: *steals ramen*
Let's see what's in here that is making you act all crazy..
*starts to investigate this case of insanity*
2008-09-13 [Chimes]: What I meant was - react calmly ... it'll be over faster. :P
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *helps investigate the case*
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: *Finds something nasty in there*
What can we conclude, inspector Misty? =3
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: That the nasty substance is killing his brain and taking over his body.
2008-09-13 [HardRockAngel]: *nods*
I am sorry to inform you that you will have to stay of the ramen if you wish to stay sane.
*smirks*
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *nods*
2008-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: What? Why would I listen to two confirmed druggies...? ...*eats ramen*... you just want my stash!! STAY BACK!! *breaks a bottle in half*
2008-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well ok keep eating that stuff you'll turn out like me.
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOO!! ...anything but that! ...*eats offbrand wramen*...
2008-09-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a piece of tinfoil at Misty*... that's the One Tinfoil... it was forged in the fires of Mount Fondume... you must take it there and destroy it in the fire or else the forces of evil (McDonalds) will take over Bob's Diner!
2008-09-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...Ok whatever,it's not like I have anything better to do.*leaves for Mount Fondume*
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Heh heh... sucker... *breaks into Misty's house while she's gone*... *takes all of her valuables*...
2008-09-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *returns five minutes later*Oh,if that was a trick to steal from me,I have nothing of value in my house
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals your house/cardboard box*
2008-09-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a house of my own yet.
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: I am straight edge, penguin. Nice try, but please DO try again >_>
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Straight edge...? ...as in... a straight edge used to divide up your blow?!
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: No, as in : No drugs, no booze, no sigarets.
And I am a vegetarian and a member of Greenpeace and WWF.
I care about the enviroment :)
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: How can you say that you care about the environment, when you keep eating it up? Stop eating out plants, hippie! ...and any member of Greenpeace has to be a druggy... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: :O
Because I care about nature?
*scratches penguins of of "Endangered species"-list*
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Nature? What good is nature? Why is everyone so concerned with it? ...I say we destroy it. Nature is the reason we have natural disasters. Nature has killed more people than any war. It gives us diseases, hurricanes, earthquakes, volcanoes, tornados, liberals, and so much more. I think we need to stop it now. It's bullied us for far too long... It's time we bomb it. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: Nature provides the ingredients for your ramen, so if you want to starve... Be my guest =P
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I only eat ramen made synthetically in a lab... it's... a personal choice. Don't judge me. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: Tofu is made in a lab too, so you see? I am not destroying the enviroment by being a vegetarian =P
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Don't vegetarians die quicker than 'meat eaters' because they don't get enough protein?
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: Depends.. I think if you watch your diet and make sure you get he same amount of proteins, no.
But if you are vegetarian who doesn't monitor your diet, it could be bad for your health.
Vegans are the fussiest eaters though
*points finger in hope to distract*
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Oh... okay ^^ I don't really know, because despite culture now days, I was raised to eat meat, however I treat animals with respect. I'm Native American, and understand and value the ways of everyone one else. So I have to prod and ask questions in order to understand ^^
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: No problem, glad I could help ^^
My parebnts force me to eat meat to sometimes, which makes me more of a flexitarian (A.I.: you only eat the strict minimum amount of meat you need)
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Flexitarian? xD! That sounds funny. Do you like the taste of meat?
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: Nope.
I eat it because I HAVE to from my parents.
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Ooh, okay DX! Because I know a few vegetarians that actually like meat, but choose not to eat it for various reasons.
2008-09-14 [HardRockAngel]: Well, I also tend to be a healthfreak, which is why I symply refuse to eat red meats.
Chicken is OK, but the minute I get to choose, I am a full vegetarian =)
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Oooh, I see ^^
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What kind of weirdo doesn't like the taste of meat...? ...*bites a chunk off a live pig*...
2008-09-14 [Imperator]: Meat...
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Ugh... I don't like pork however.. x_x
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What?!! Pork rules! ...ain't nothin' better'n pig... 'cept horse...
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: O_O; I'd rather not eat horse. Deer maybe... Mmmm... Deeeer...
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Annual fair is this week... which is also annual "call Nok" time...
2008-09-14 [nokaredes]: ...*hasn't gotten any alleged "call"*...
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Not yet you haven't!
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: ... Your mom.
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...your face! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Wah!
2008-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...yo, yo! It's me!
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Darn that Wal-Mart! These Turkey traps clearly don't work... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yup... they obviously ripped you off, man... *walks over to the table, with 4 traps stuck to my leg*...
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... uh huh... *slowly reaches for a blow-torch on the wall*
2008-09-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *quickly looks up at you!*... Oh my God! ...there's a bug on that wall! ...*goes back to being oblivious*...
2008-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... of course... *tries to grab the blow-torch, but clutches a bug instead*... AAAAH! It's biting me!! Why didn't anyone warn me?!
2008-09-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *shakes head and sits back* Oh my.
2008-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm a Marxist of the Groucho variety... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-15 [nokaredes]: Your Marx jokes are getting kind of old...
2008-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! *hires cheap Mexican immigrants to make more*
2008-09-15 [whitehot]: *steals mexican* *tells him to make alot of ramen*
2008-09-15 [HardRockAngel]: *steals ramen*..*eats ramen*..*copyright-infringes Penguins's saying :P*
2008-09-16 [whitehot]: O_O what did you just do.......
I WANT MY RAMEN
2008-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *appears from no where*SUP?!
2008-09-16 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: x_x...
2008-09-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: You ok?
2008-09-16 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Yeah, I was crushed by huge ramen.
2008-09-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-09-17 [zankou]: its nice to know that i can make friends this fast,,lol thaks for the invite...
2008-09-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello new comer.
2008-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Newcomer?! *chickens burst in and beat up the new guy*... sorry... standard procedure... Yo, chickens! Give me that wallet! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
2008-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa... I've never seen that Misty guy either... *lions burst in and attack/mount Misty*
2008-09-17 [nokaredes]: What? Who told you we were your friends, [zankou]? I want to know so's I can sue them for slander...
2008-09-17 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: o_o;; Oh my.
2008-09-17 [Duke Devlin]: In reference to a comment back up there - *punches Mortified Penguin*<3
Also - Misty, stfu. Don't 'Whatever' my Keir. >=O
Also... ZOMFG! *throws rabid geese everywhere*
2008-09-17 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: HEY!DON'T YOU BE MEAN TO MY COUSIN!*huggles Misty*
2008-09-17 [Chimes]: You haven't been here very long, have you? That's probably something you'll have to get used to.
2008-09-17 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I've been on here before,and I'm fucking tired of you guys making fun of my cousin,just because you are so insecure about yourselves,and you take joy in making fun of others doesn't mean you can target and make fun of Misty!
2008-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I keep telling you... you're Misty. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-17 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: And you're a mean-ramen eating-fat assed-fuckwad!
2008-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah... that's Misty alright... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-17 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I'm not Misty,my name is Pamela Miller Pam for short.
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuuure it is... Whatever you say, Misty... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-18 [whitehot]: .....this is intense..though im still suspicious..


2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh...What's going on here?
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *smashes Smarties into a powdery state*... *snorts the dust*...
2008-09-18 [whitehot]: misty and queen lady that is pissed off is suspicious *eats ramen with soy sauce*
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why are we suspicious?
2008-09-18 [whitehot]: <_<  >_> ..........you are suspects.......we are thinking youre from the kidney stealing society....but so much you just pissy queen lady
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh....no.
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: What does "ZOMFG" mean? Oh well, it seems appropriate:
ZOMFG! That paper clip ticks me off so badly! Once in school it wouldn't go away and I said "You bastard!" rather loudly...
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh oh... it's seems as though you people have discovered my "paper clip" virus! ...*jumps out an 85-foot high window*...
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: *calls down to you as you fall* Actually we just found a paper clip attached to a paper about the iris!
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: *takes your freakin' "lol" and crams it down your throat!!*
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: And remember, kids. BYOB. ...Buy Your Own Buddies. ...*eats ramen*... *sells Misty to some French fur traders*...
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *steals all of the French food and gives it to the homeless*
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: *sells Misty some French - for free*
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *steals your ramen and gives it to the men living underground*
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: I bet they live underground because they looked at your face and went insane! Oooooooo! BURN! You got torched!
2008-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: No,they went underground because [Mortified Penguin] lured them to his house with Ramen,forced them to watch Barney,and then he raped them.
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: 0.0 No wonder... Pour souls...
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps Misty with a dueling glove*... I acceptify your challenge! We shall duel tomorry at noon!
2008-09-18 [HardRockAngel]: *sigh*
Is it even possible to have a civilized conversation here?
Let me guess...No? =P
2008-09-18 [Imperator]: I will have a civilized conversation with you, sir. *sips tea* Now assuming the federal government defaults on its payments, the federal reserve may collapse and destroy the viability of the dollar as we are no longer on the gold standard. What do you say to that my good man? *sips tea*
2008-09-18 [Chimes]: Are you trying to sound British? If so, we don't talk like that. :P
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: It's all in the way you read it... sadly though, I can't read English... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-18 [Chimes]: It comes naturally for me. :P
2008-09-18 [Duke Devlin]: OMFG LOL! You REALLY think that ANYONE here is showing their insecurity by insulting Misty? XD OMFG LOL ONCE MOAR. You should know that I am taking the piss out of you - I very rarely use the abbreviation 'LOL'. ;)
As does it for I, Chimes. ;)
2008-09-18 [Chimes]: It's because we're so awesome.


And if you're not Misty, Queen, why do you type in exactly the same way as she does?
2008-09-18 [Duke Devlin]: I know. >=D
And I quite agree with you, dear. She does type in the same way. Misty, we are not stupid. ;)
2008-09-18 [Chimes]: Elementary, dear Watson. :P
2008-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and it's obviously Misty in the picture on her house... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-18 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Riiiiiiiight....I can type any way I want to missy!
2008-09-18 [Chimes]: You can, yes... but it only makes us think you're Misty.
2008-09-18 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Whatever,I don't have to prove who I am,as long as I know I'm who I say I am you can think I'm Betty Crocker for all I care.
2008-09-19 [Paul Doyle]: Since I'm a coin/currency collector, I'll reply to [Imperator] regarding the Federal Reserve, though I'm by no means an economist. There used to be yellow-sealed Gold Certificates, in denominations of $10 bills all the way up to the $100,000 bills which are illegal for everyday Americans to own. If you go to the Smithsonian numismatic exhibit, you'll se the $100,000 Gold Certificate. It's a Series 1934 small size (that is, modern-sized US currency) note, and has Woodrow Wilson on the front. All the lesser-value Gold Certificates ($10 up to $10,000) are still legal to own, and they still are legal tender (though you's be out of your mind to spend them!) Up until 1933, you could take any of these notes, and get American gold coins ($1, $2.50, $5, $10 aqnd $20) in exchange, as assurance the US monetary system was banked by solid gold. Great Depression-era legislation made it illegal for Americans to own gold, other than things like collector coins, jewelry and the like. So an old Spanish doubloon was OK, but gold bullion bars were illegal. There were no more new US gold coins minted after 1933, only the commemoratives starting in 1984. Those rather harsh laws helped the US survive and recover from the Great Depression. (Of course, World War Two is what really did it.)


Up until the mid-1960s there were also Silver Certificates with the blue seals. $1 silver certificate notes where everywhere (and are still very cheap at the coin shop), and most denominations except the $2 bill (which were all red-sealed United States Notes from the 1920s through the 1960s) had Silver Certificate varieties. I personally have $1, $5 and $10 Silver Certificates in my collection.


Again, you could take the $1 Silver Certificate to the bank and get a Morgan/Peace silver dollar in exchange, way back when. Later, it became a like amount of chintzy silver dust. American coins of 10c/25c/50c/$1 values were all 90% silver/10% copper, ending in 1964. Even though the gold standard had long since been abandoned, the idea of the silver Certificate (along with the red-sealed United States Notes) were anachronisms. But then they replaced the silver coinage with the modern 75% copper/25% clad (except the half dollar, which was a reduced 30% silver coin through 1970) that was the sign the US had truly embraced the purely speculative (if well protected and insured) Federal Reserve system, which had been in existence since the 1910's. So now all coins are in effect "token" coinage (because the coins have no intristic value that would be provided by silver and gold!) and all US currency notes since the late 1960s are the familiar green-sealed Federal Reserve Notes, which again have no solid backing, and are therefore "token" and speculative.


With the US economy in trouble, I'd think it would be wise to return to the gold/silver without abandoning the Federal Reserves. You can't make silver and gold coins out of pocket change anymore, thanks to inflation, but you CAN protect the actual system with vastly increased gold and silver reserves, without making restrictions on the public.


This "tl;dr" passage of stultifying nerdiness brought to you by [Paul Doyle], a numismatist since 1985, and a scared-shitless average American adult since 1991.
2008-09-19 [Duke Devlin]: Well that was so long I decided not to read it within seconds of sighting it! :O Terribly sorry old bean. :)
Also... *smacks Queen of the Shadows with a rusty piece of bacon - cause she has a stupidly long name* >.>
2008-09-19 [Chimes]: Old bean? XD
2008-09-19 [Duke Devlin]: Exactly! I'm british, may as well use the cliche.
2008-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Our English teacher is lazy, so we've been watching Monty Python and the Holy Grail in class...
2008-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...stupid black knight... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Monty Python and the Holy Grail???Your teacher really let's you watch that,ok yeah that is a lazy teacher and I love that movie,it's so funny.
2008-09-19 [Imperator]: [Paul Doyle], I read you entire thesis paper up there and as interesting as it was, it didn't even directly respond to my civilized discussion I was attempting to begin! *viciously throws tea cup at Paul's head*
2008-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: The only thing I hate about the movie is the idiotic fans...


*sips tea*
2008-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sips on a strange redish liquid in a glass*
2008-09-19 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *is eating special teriyaki flavoured ramen with veggies* ... *for real*
2008-09-20 [Imperator]: *chugs apple juice*
2008-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws bannanas*
2008-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright! Apple juice rules! ...*burns orange juice*...
2008-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok then
2008-09-20 [zankou]: wheee!~
2008-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello Zankou.
2008-09-20 [zankou]: hello misty-chan, how goes your life?
2008-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: My life is good,how goes your life?
2008-09-20 [nokaredes]: Hey guys, I'm in the Army now, see you in three months when I get out from Basic Training!
2008-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: See ya
2008-09-21 [Duke Devlin]: Woahs! Good luck Nok. :O
2008-09-21 [Imperator]:
Oh, say, can you see, by the dawn's early light,
What so proudly we hailed at the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose broad stripes and bright stars, thro' the perilous fight'
O'er the ramparts we watched, were so gallantly streaming.
And the rockets red glare, the bombs bursting in air,
Gave proof through the night that our flag was still there.
Oh, say, does that star-spangled banner yet wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave?


On the shore dimly seen, thro' the mists of the deep,
Where the foe's haughty host in dread silence reposes,
What is that which the breeze, o'er the towering steep,
As it fitfully blows, half conceals, half discloses?
Now it catches the gleam of the morning's first beam,
In full glory reflected, now shines on the stream;
'Tis the star-spangled banner: oh, long may it wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.


And where is that band who so vauntingly swore
That the havoc of war and the battle's confusion
A home and a country should leave us no more?
Their blood has wash'd out their foul footstep's pollution.
No refuge could save the hireling and slave
From the terror of flight or the gloom of the grave,
And the star-spangled banner in triumph doth wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.


Oh, thus be it ever when free men shall stand,
Between their loved homes and the war's desolation;
Blest with vict'ry and peace, may the heav'n-rescued land
Praise the Power that has made and preserved us as a nation.
Then conquer we must, when our cause is just,
And this be our motto: "In God is our trust";
And the star-spangled banner in triumph shall wave
O'er the land of the free and the home of the brave.




The bolded lines is my favorite part. :-) *salutes [nokaredes]*
2008-09-21 [Duke Devlin]: You know, I've never EVER seen the full version of that. :) Being British, means that it isn't really part of ... US. XD
I don't even know ours.
2008-09-21 [Imperator]: You don't know the British national anthem? That's a little sad... Isn't it God Save the Queen?
2008-09-21 [Duke Devlin]: No I know the name of it. XD I just don't know the whole version of it. :P
2008-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn that queen... *eats ramen*... you know... I was once a queen myself...
2008-09-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2008-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Thank you for your contribution, Misty... You will be greatly rewarded... in Hell... *hands you a coupon*... *eats ramen*... that coupon's good for one free face scraping...
2008-09-24 [Paul Doyle]: 



2008-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why would I want a face scrape?
2008-09-24 [Chimes]: I have a feeling you wont like the answer to that question... for I have a feeling Mort will be mean.
2008-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm offended... I try to give this poor, ugly man/lady a free coupon for a face scraping and you assume I'm mean? ...how dare you. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-24 [Chimes]: *shakes head* Mort, Mort, Mort.
2008-09-24 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: o_o Good land...
2008-09-24 [Imperator]: Actually, the soil is rather poor...
2008-09-24 [Duke Devlin]: YAY B's D! :D
I personally agree with Mort. ;) How dare you assume he is being mean, Chimes? :P He is merely being charitable. :P
2008-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *tries to plant Cheerios in the ground*... darn this soil! I can't even grow donuts! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-25 [Duke Devlin]: I want Cheerios, man. XD
2008-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *sits at his desk in the office*... You come to me and you say, "Mortified Penguin, give me Cheerios." But you don't ask with respect. You don't offer friendship. You don't even think to call me Godfather. ...*eats ramen*... What have I ever done to make you treat me so disrespectfully?
2008-09-25 [Duke Devlin]: Oh I'm very sorry. *raises eyebrow* Since when did you become the Godfather? I was unaware of this sudden change. Please accept this apology, and this.. Token.., of friendship. *passes you a golden box of cheerios* ... oO
2008-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Golden Cheerios! My one weakness! How did you know?! *dies a sudden, unnecessarily gruesome death*
2008-09-25 [Chimes]: Wow, that was dramatic. o.o
2008-09-26 [zankou]: what did i miss???
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Explosions... destruction... leprechauns... the usual... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-26 [zankou]: can i have some ramen??
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks down the door and bursts in*... *pulls out a knife*... who took my knife?! ...*brandishes knife threateningly*... I'll kill you all!! ...*eats ramen with the knife*...
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: CHIYA!!!!
*hides the stash*
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... stash...
2008-09-26 [zankou]: I....WANT....RAMEN!!!!!! *pulls out spoon and waves dangerously*
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: *whispers*
Oh no.
2008-09-26 [zankou]: give me ramen NOW! and nobody has to get spooned!!!
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: DO A BARREL ROLL!
DO IT!
2008-09-26 [zankou]: the "barrel roll" as you call it will not avial you! flame of iunduin, YOU SHALL NOT...PASSS! ps...GIVE ME RAMEN!!!
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *twirls my giant flaming whip*... *trips and falls down a big hole*...
2008-09-26 [zankou]: you scream? is that all?? is that allll??? IS THAT ALLLL!!!!!???? *sklurch* *lower jaw goes flying amid a sprey of blood and teeth*
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: I give. Uncle, uncle!
2008-09-26 [zankou]: good, now give me ramen.
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: So far during this friscal (THAT'S RIGHT! FRISCAL, DARN YOU!) year, B's D has an average daily comment number of 12.82. Here are the daily comment averages of the past four years:


Year 1: 26.59


Year 2: 10.6


Year 3: 8.39


Year 4: 15.55


Quite clearly, we are falling behind a bit. Granted, it's not as bad as years 2 and 3, but it's still pretty bad. So go, you losers- I mean, customers! Advertise! ...*throws ramen into the air*...
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: I put my 2 cents in my house for ya. And [zankou] the ramen has left the building and into a vacumn cleaner. HAHAHAHAHAH!!
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Good, good. Also, watch out for the falling ramen... it appears to be boiling... *dives under a table*...
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: OH DEAR GOD IT'S EVERYWHERE LIKE MY GRANDMAS BEDPAN CONTENTS!
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I thought that helmet smelled like pee... *eats ramen*... *washes hair... with Herbal Essence!*
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: Yeah well that's why you suppose to check before you strap one on :)
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: Then fight in my grandmothers stools!
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I shall.
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: Indeed! (I just love that word)
2008-09-26 [whitehot]: how come this all happens in a diner? why would this stuff happen in a diner?
2008-09-26 [HardRockAngel]: *throws chicken at [whitehot]*
Never call Bob's Diner just "a diner" =P
2008-09-26 [whitehot]: *cringes* IM SORRY!!! .......where did you get a live chicken...?
2008-09-26 [HardRockAngel]: *waves hand mystically*
It's magic... =D
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: She's a witch! *points at HardRockAngel*... *a mob of disgruntled looking villagers show up with pitch forks and torches*...
2008-09-26 [whitehot]: ok its sooooooooooo boring talking here please go here....nothing dirty just a instant chat http://xat.com/web_gear/chat/go_large.php?id=36120177
2008-09-26 [HardRockAngel]: *sigh*
Figure of speech. *shakes head -unmagically-* :P
2008-09-26 [whitehot]: ...please go there
2008-09-26 [Thunder Cid]: Come on everyone lets all go to KFC in spite of [Mortified Penguin]
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOO!!! ...well... actually... pick me up some chicken there... the food here sucks... *spits on the floor*... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and don't forget, kids... Bob's Corporate Empire covers every type of product! ...even x-rated ones! ...Bob's Brothel... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wow...You guys are...AWESOME!lol
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: Sure thing. 3 piece or 6?
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate KFC's chicken.
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: YOU DIE! *pulls out harpoon gun*
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?!
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: No body hate KFC! *fires harpoon gun*
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I like KFC I just don't like their fried chicken.
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: That doesn't make sense. You don't say you like Baseball, but not baseball. And didn't I shoot you?
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: No,that was a clone.
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: Ah I see.
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: yep
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: Then I shall attack you. LEAF HURRICANE!
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY NO STEALING MOVES FROM ROCK LEE!*grabs your leg in mid air*
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: I am Rock Lee!
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: No you're not!...If you are then marry me!
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: No I like Sakura.
2008-09-27 [Duke Devlin]: Message for [~Crimson Angel~]: Your never-ending stash of clones has just run out. Any 'clones' you claim to have in the future are lies and are merely ripples of yourself caused by a tear in the space-time continuum. Please refrain from making use of these ripples, as they are incapable of human interaction, and as such are unable to become foils for you. Thank you. NEBS Corporation.
2008-09-27 [Chimes]: *hysterical laughter*
2008-09-27 [Imperator]: Never Ending Bull Shit? Oh! You're talking about Obama, right? Oooooooo! BURN on Obama!
2008-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Obama heard that! He's coming to your house! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-27 [Imperator]: *gets banned guns ready*
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: Ha now your mine. CHIYA! *roundhouse kick to the nipple*
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blocks with a big metal sheild*DUDE WHAT THE FUCK?!
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: I told you if you don't like KFC chicken then you must die.
2008-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats a KFC bowl*... mmm... various foods... *also eats ramen*...
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I eat their chicken just not their fried chicken,I don't like their fried chicken.
2008-09-27 [Thunder Cid]: Blasphemy! Everyone likes fried chicken. It's freakin human nature. *splashes holy water on Misty*
2008-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! How could you not like fried chicken...? ...clearly, you are lying... why are you lying, Misty?! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well to me KFC's fried chicken is slimey and gross,I like my grandma's friend chicken better.
2008-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Slimey?! It's crispy! And sometimes extra crispy! ...and you said earlier that you didn't like fried chicken... and now you claim you do, in fact, like your grandma's fried chicken...
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I do like my grandma's fried Chicken,I don't like KFC's fried chicken.
2008-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: But you do like fried chicken. And since we've established that KFC's chicken is not actually slimey, but instead, extra crispy, what is your excuse for not liking it?
2008-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I think it is.
2008-09-28 [sara(:]: yo.
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: hi
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you, Sara... how'd you like that Pharaoh this year...?
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]:
cids rants about things that suck
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...*goes to*
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: I just had to DO IT! But seriously I think you'll love my newest one Penguin.
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Excellent... *pushes Misty down some stairs to celebrate*...
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: YES! *stomps on Misty while she's down*
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: 'Bama whooped Georgia, son! We'll probably be ranked 3rd now... or... we'd better be... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs a metal baseballbat and hits [Thunder Cid] in his crouch*PERVERT!
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: Let's shoot for at least 2nd.


*falls over*
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *beats [Mortified Penguin] over the head with the same baseball bat repeatedly*Fucking noob!
2008-09-28 [Imperator]: *Ignites lightsaber* *slices through baseball bat and Misty's neck*
2008-09-28 [HardRockAngel]: *quietly tries to evade the fight* Ah, to hell with that!
*Takes out daggers*
2008-09-28 [Duke Devlin]: I fucking LOVE that you got that, Imperator. XD NEBS. :D
Also; for giggles - *throws baked beans on Misty*
2008-09-28 [Imperator]: What did I get?! *waves lightsaber threateningly in your direction*
2008-09-28 [HardRockAngel]: The temper, the temper. Sheesh =P
2008-09-28 [Imperator]: I draw on my anger to fuel the dark side of the force! Don't question me! *points menacingly in your direction*
2008-09-28 [HardRockAngel]: *sharpens daggers* I came prepared >=)
Though maybe we should keep the anger for when someone really gets annoying =P


Btw, I haven't heard from the Herald yet since I offered to be a gopher =S
2008-09-28 [Imperator]: *sharpens lightsaber* Me too!
Someone annoying? Like you for questioning me! *attacks with force lightning*


*lightning freezes* Um... What page did you offer on?
2008-09-28 [HardRockAngel]: Errr, don't remember since it has been a while ago.. Like Pre summervacation =P
*snaps and lightning comes back*
*swiftly trades daggers for katana*
-Hajime!!!-
2008-09-28 [Chimes]: A gopher? Am I missing something? XD
2008-09-28 [HardRockAngel]: *freezes jump*


Oops o.o
Should've been 'gofer' as in the one who fetches all sorts of stuff. I applied for that at the Town Herald.


*Goes on jumping and battle...-crying or something like it :P*
2008-09-28 [Imperator]: *twirls lightsaber elegantly* You fool! You are no match for the power of the dark side! *swings at your legs*


*swing freezes* I think the other Herald people wanted you to make guest submissions instead since you couldn't be sure of always being able to make the deadlines... *swing resumes*
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *shoves a metal baseball bat up [Imperator]'s nose*
2008-09-28 [Amish Hammer]: amazing what that girl can do with a mortal wound
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: He cut my puppet's head off.
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: ???
*throws a sack of cow manure on everyone*
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Don't waste that cow manure! That's my personal stash!
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: It's going to be okay, manure... *gently pets the bag of manure*... *glances around*... *licks fingers*...
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...


♜♞♝♛♚♝♞♜
♟♟♟♟♟♟♟♟








♙♙♙♙♙♙♙♙
♖♘♗♕♔♗♘♖
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude what's with the squares?
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats more ramen*... Your move, Misty. Winner lives... loser dies.


♜♞♝♛♚♝♞♜
♟♟♟♟♟♟♟♟






               ♙
♙♙♙♙♙   ♙♙
♖♘♗♕♔♗♘♖
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Is this some freaky checkers thing?
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Get a better computer! ...*eats ramen*... that is clearly a chess set. Also, I win by default... *shoots Misty*...
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: BUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude it's just a bunch of fucking squares.*shoves a rusty pipe up your butt*
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: no there not their chess pieces.
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: All I see is a bunch of squares!
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: Really?
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes,maybe it's my computer,oh well.
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! You have a loser computer. (in reality I do)
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's my dad's computer,my computer doesn't have internet access.
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: I laugh at your computer and throw dung at it.
(but really that sucks)
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]:
I HAVE A NEW STORY!!!
2008-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok then,Loser!
2008-09-28 [Thunder Cid]: YOU READ OR I SEND TINY PLAID NINJA AFTER YOU AND YOUR FAMILY!
2008-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Ninja?! ...*Chuck Norris and sixteen pirates burst in and... stab Misty or something*...
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, losers... go vote for the first option on the poll in mainstreet... the crappy one... with the T-Rex in a hat... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *joins back into the fight*


Dark side? You make me laugh. The light shall prevail!


*swings katana and aims for your swordhand whilst staying prepared to block attacks if neccesary*


*swing freezes* *shrugs* Okay, will see what I can send in then from time to time :)


*swing continous*
2008-09-29 [Chimes]: Cid! If you are the Heralder Cid... GET SUBMITTING. :P XD


Anywho... awesome chess set Mort.
2008-09-29 [Imperator]: It's clearly a checkers set because a pawn can't make that move. Only a checkers piece could do that one.
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Depends on how your computer interprets the chess set...
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *sees [Imperator]*
*Draws dagger*
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: http://cgi.ebay.com/Lighten-up-Mighty-Morphin-Power-Rangers-Green-1-1Helmet_W0QQitemZ360086563752QQihZ023QQcategoryZ18839QQtcZphotoQQcmdZViewItem



I gotta buy that thing! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-29 [Thunder Cid]: Hells yeah! I want that too.
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: What is so special about this helmet? o.O
*fails to understand*
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Don't be dissin' the Green Ranger! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-29 [Imperator]: *sneaks quietly away from [HardRockAngel]*
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *pouts*
Now I missed my chance of conquering the dark force...
*squints at Mort*
Thanks a lot!
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! *buys the dark force on eBay*
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *swiftly swings katana, aiming at your vital parts*
2008-09-29 [Imperator]: Yes! Some moron clicked "but it now" for twice as much as it is at Wal-Mart!
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *consists entirely of non-vital parts*... *3rd appendix gets slashed*... well, darn... that was my second favorite appendix!
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you, Wal-Mart! Slashing prices on Death Stars! ...I'll never be able to sell this one in my backyard now... *blows it up for the insurance money*...
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *aims...lower xD*
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Nooo! Not my non-functional eighth testicle!
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *starts to slash furiously* xD
2008-09-29 [Imperator]: *covers eyes*
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *insurance agent shows up*...


"How did this death star blow up?"...


Oh, uh... there was a bunch of rebel teenagers... one of them shot some sort of photon laser thingy right into the exaust vent...


"Uh huh... You wouldn't believe how many times that's happened... there was this one helmeted freak just last week......"
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: O.O


Are you trying to steal money from the insurance company?
*doesn't understand -again-* :p
2008-09-29 [Imperator]: This looks like a situation for lawyers... *sends in lawyers*
"Hello insurance fool. We have proof that your company is committing fraud. Agree to my client's demands and we won't press charges."
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *insurance guy pulls out a gun!*
2008-09-29 [HardRockAngel]: *slices insurance guy in half with sharpened katana*
Game over..
Wish to continue? =p
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *insurance guy respawns!* ...he's got two extra lives! ...and he'll get one more if he gets another 1,000 points!
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Green Ranger?!AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA OMG,I used to watch Power Rangers when I was six years old untill I was 10.
2008-09-29 [Imperator]: I thought you were nine and a half...


*lawyers flee scene of battle to collect on life insurance*
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: What do you mean used to...? ...You sayin' you don't watch it anymore? Huh?! ...Them's fightin' words, boy! *unsheathes a turnip*
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm 17 I'll be 18 in November.Sorry [Mortified Penguin] but I got tired of watching it.
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Terrorist!
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why am I a Terrorist just because I got tired of watching Power Rangers?I like the old one the new ones are strange.
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, of course the new ones suck... that's why you're supposed to watch the old ones instead... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: The old ones never come on anymore.
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Buy the VHS tapes!
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...or... the cheaper alternative... watch them on Youtube!
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok.
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: God! You are just.., SO uninventive, Misty.
2008-09-29 [Chimes]: XD
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: Quite!
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...WHAT THE HELL...?
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: I must say your use of capitals in that question is simply magnificent. No other could possibly have utilised them in such a way.
For those too stupid to understand; Extreme Satire in progress.
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok then.*coughcoughbitchcoughcough*
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: oooo... *eats ramen*... You gonna take that, Duke?
2008-09-29 [Chimes]: AHAHAHAHAHAAAA~! Dukey, you and your Satirical prowess are wonderful.
Wonders never cease with the lack of witty replies to said prowess though.
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: Well dears, am I really that likely to just 'let that slide'? ;)
Now Misty, we can't have you coughing all the time like that! You seem to be spewing rather unpleasant words, of which I am very familiar. However, you really should take something for it - many aren't as friendly as I when replying to such tripe. Fortunately for the rest of us, you are the only Elftownian I have met thus far to attempt 'concealment' of such an insulting lexical choice. If it were not the case, I am sure that we would have simply hung-drawn and quartered each of you thrice by now.
As for the word choice itself - I am sure you can manage a more mature way of calling me a 'bitch'. You are nearly eighteen years of age, after all. ;)
2008-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *snap*... you can't let her say that to you, Misty! Go get 'er! ...*eats ramen*... *sets up camera*...
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: *Goads Misty* Come on. ;)
2008-09-29 [Chimes]: *is Dukey's wing-girl* Uh-huh. Mmm-hmmm. And other such paralinguistic features.
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: *Appreciates* ;)
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Like I'd ever listen to that fat assed-ramen eating-fuckwad!Oh and Duke Devlin,incase you didn't figure it out I am immature and I love it,but I can be serious when the situation calls for it,and to all of you I don't know why you take pleasure in annoying the shit out of me and making fun of me,but it needs to stop.
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: Well, in all seriousness Misty, I am merely joking. I don't actually mean you harm in anyway as I am simply not that mean - to people I don't know. So that is my disclaimer, it shall not be repeated. This goes for anything I say to anyone on this wiki-page, bar maybe some.
But please, do continue with your immaturity. It won't get you far in life though, that I assure you.
2008-09-29 [Chimes]: And I have, technically, never said anything mean to you. I've just protected and/or cheerleaded... for Duke. :P
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: Quite right, dear Chimes. For I do not exactly need somebody to fight my battles for me, that is actually a rare occurance (your protecting ;) of course). So it would be very bizarre for you to get in trouble for being 'abusive'. ;)
2008-09-29 [Chimes]: Exactly. I only do the protection thing when you're not online. :P Otherwise... I'm the wing-girl.
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: Naturlich. ;) <-- That word would of course have been german, had I bothered to locate the umlaut. ;)
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well even if you are joking I still don't find it amusing only you and the rest of the wackjobs on this wiki do.
2008-09-29 [Duke Devlin]: Well that's a shame. Sadly, this place is basically made for satire and our own personal amusement. So I am afraid it is simply something you will have to deal with, isn't it? ;) Baby. :P
2008-09-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nope!*leaves*
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen!!!*
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You people suck... that wasn't funny at all! *spits in Duke's eye for no reason*
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals Tiny Tim's crutch, smacks him in the face with it, and pushes him down a flight of stairs*... that'll teach you! Next time you'd better pay what you owe!
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: *pays debts with trembling hands*
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Yea'... dat's wha' I thought! ...*harpoons Tiny Tim with his own crutch*...
2008-09-30 [Amish Hammer]: dude, i love this comment section.
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Me too... what?! "Amish Hammer"?! ...is that anything like the Hebrew Hammer...? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-09-30 [Amish Hammer]: that's the idea. allthough i may need to think of a new name, the beard is now gone, 3 years we had together.... i wanna cry. it shall live again, i just don't know how soon, depends on if i get another job soon and what they want.
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! Now you're just a hammer... *eats ramen*...
2008-09-30 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: so, how do i join?
its sounds funkadelic motherfucker!!!
2008-09-30 [Duke Devlin]: How bizarre! :O *promptly returns the favour by spitting in Mort's ear, for no reason* How'd'you like me NOW? HUH? >=D
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *turnes topic into Elections in the U.S.A.*
Anyone who has some background knowledge of the upcoming elections should see this : http://www.nbc.com/Saturday_Night_Live/video/clips/couric-palin-open/704042/.
=P
2008-09-30 [Duke Devlin]: *Knows not, cares not* I'm more interested in the current economic and financial issues plaguing our country. -___- It's getting ridiculous. :(
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: I try to steer clear of that... it's too much for my little brain.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: Sure is =S.


Here in Belgium, our "has-been" biggest bank is tumbling down in the financial market and the people are scared as hell for their savings.


And the best part is that only their saving wil be protected in case of a bankrupcy. Not their pension or their shares in the company (which are usually worth more than their savings). And! The fund that is used as a safetynet can only provide a certain amount of the money lost, not the entire amount.


One would be scared for much less =/
2008-09-30 [Duke Devlin]: I agree! I know I am terrified for our financial market currently! We are in a recession, and I am seriously hoping that something happens to sort it out - FAST. We've had a lot of prices increasing lately (as has everywhere), but just recently we've had banks going down, and we've had to borrow off of the United States to sort it out. On this front I am unsure, as I swiftly changed the tv channel when it came on, as it makes me depressed.
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: Bring on the Great Depression II! It's about time these greedy bankers got their comeupins!
2008-09-30 [Duke Devlin]: Well Imperator, that's all very well and good, but this is affecting everyone. It isn't really fair, see? ;)
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: Is it fair to take everyone's money to bail out these greedy bankers? World wide economies are going to crash regardless of what the stupid government does. The $700 billion bail-out would have only stalled the inevitable.
2008-09-30 [Duke Devlin]: I quite agree with you, Imperator. However, we are never going to convince a greedy, self-righteous government that what they are doing is benefitting no one in the long run but themselves. It is simply not going to happen.
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Does anyone even know WHY everything started to go crap in the first place? I certainly don't.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: I agree with the fact that they had it coming, [Imperator], but! It is affecting a lot of the "Average Joe's" here in Belgium.


The Financial Director won't feel it in his wallet when he has to declare bankrupcy.
The stockholders, however will be ruined (check the case Lennart & Hauspie for instance) and the people who were so trusting (or foolish could be the word) not to spread their money will be left with virtualy nothing of all they have worked for.


And I, for one, am scared with what the future might hold, since the predictions on the stockmarket all seem to be rather grim and the prices will -no doubt- climb even higher.
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: Trust me I know how it feels. My gold investment went down so fast today that I lost nearly 4k.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: Since I am a "kid", I can't really relate to how it feels to lose a lot of money in the stockmarket/in your shares.


You have my support however,(as far as support over the internet can go, but ah well) and I will surely hope this situation can be resolved.


Though the everliving pessimist in me says it will take a long while and the crisis will never truly be resolved. =/
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Like I said up there... Anyone know why it happened?
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: That I might have to ask my uncle who lives in America (Must be some fun times there now, no? )
From what I have heard, It is somewhat of a snowballeffect since the American Housemarket collapsed?
-correct me if I'm wrong-


*is going to do some research*
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: Your pretty much in the right place. People had bad credit and couldn't make payments on their houses which caused a lot of issues.
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Then why did that affect the other countries? *is no good with these things*
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: Well that I'm not too sure on.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: I was right about something? -Yay!-
*Puts on straight face*
I mean : Of course! =p


*Edit: [Duke Devlin], If I have my facts straight, you live in Britain, right?
This is an article on the financial predictions: http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/broke-britain-millions-face-struggle-to-stay-afloat-as-financial-crisis-hits-home-767584.html
I read it and it is downright scary O.O
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: [Chimes], this might answer your question (Or in the worst case leave you with more questions =S).


American Financial markets "crashed" when a lot of debts by people couldn't be repaid, thus leaving the companies with debts and so on and so on (see the domino-effect?). That and the fact the American Gouvernement has made a mess of their finances.


As to why it affects Europe and other countries too?
If I'm not mistaking, the Financial markets are all connected in one way. So for instance a company here could have subdivisions in America and vice cersa. When the market collapses in America, the division of the company here will experience more or less the same problems. And if the financial market here were to plunge (even depeper) the companies branch in America will encounter the same financial problems.


I hope this more or less explains it in a correct way =).
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Dukey and I both live in Britain, your facts are straight.


Ah! That makes more sense now. I hadn't considered the sub-divisions.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: Glad I could clear some things up for you =).
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: This is going to be a pickle for sure.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: Yup, especially since the American Gouvernement has to use every dime to pay for coffins *and now why would that be. *, has to cover up their financial sasspool and -last but not least- the Gouvernement has no clue as to what could be done to resolve it... ...We're in it for the long run -yay- >_>.


But don't think I hate the U.S.A. though, the European gouvernement is equally clueless. Look at Belgium: We can't even seem to keep our country and Gouvernement together. Now why then, I ask you, do we think we can resolve the entire crisis? x)
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Hmm... Who knows...
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: But enough of this seriousness. Isn't Bob's Diner all about fun?
*grabs a hold of a chicken*
*grins*
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: Oh God don't throw it!


*hits the ground*
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *throws chicken with the skill of a ... skilled chicken-thrower or something like it*
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: I told you! Angels crazy! Everyone run!
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: I am not crazy. And it's merely a chicken you...chicken!
*no pun intended*


*pets the chicken*


Would you rather have me draw my daggers? >=)
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Run? PAH! Running is for n00bs. I FLY! *flies*
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: Chickens cause diseases and are infested with germs. I'll take on the dagger.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *dips the dagger in poisons derived from a frog*
*Throws after aiming carefully*
[Chimes], Bow and arrow still excist you know =P
*edit: Or guns, mustn't forget guns
*seems to be stuck at mediaeval modus*
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: *curls up and hardens like a pokemon*
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Ah, but you forget, I do not exist. I am merely an illusion here at Bob's Diner.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *pokes trough [Chimes]-shade*
This ois fun =P
*keeps poking and waving through the shade*


*Recovers dagger from wound of Cid*
2008-09-30 [Amish Hammer]: here in america, local banks don't hold onto your mortgage for longer than it takes to sign on the dotted line. instead they sell it to a mortgage holder, whose standards have been terrible for the past few years, they were accepting everyone. in a lot of metro areas you could get a loan just if you had an ID and a social security number. anywho, then these smaller loan companies go out of business whn te lazy ppl they've loaned to don't pay, mind u at the time they take out insurance on their company and usually mke money on the deal.... anywho, the mortgages are then bought by national companies, like freddie and fanny. then the american public stands behind these companies b/c they're afraid of what will happen to their house if the company goes out of business. i don't know much about anything but this is just part of the problem as i understand it. that and the fed exists to begin with and our paper money is just that, paper.
2008-09-30 [Amish Hammer]: all i know is if i hd any considerable amount of cash i'd try to invest in gold. precious metals are the only thing that maintain value(and increase n situations like now) over here.
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: Hello there's a chicken and dagger fight going on now.
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: XD Nice, Cid.


And would you stop doing that. XD It tingles.
2008-09-30 [Thunder Cid]: What was I doing O.O
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: Ewwwwwwww!!! Sickos. *eats coleslaw* Dear god this is good...
2008-09-30 [Amish Hammer]: my bad, anybody runnin a book on this thing? i'd like to place a bet.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *stops waving hands through the shade*
Sorry [Chimes] =P


*Eats sushi* This is good too =)
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: Place a bet on what? McCain winning?
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: McCain winning is -sadly enough- not that strange =S
Let's hope the American population will choose wisely =)
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: And not choose Obama.
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: Mhmm?
Though I am not that familiar ith either program, I think I remember something like "If McCain were to gain presidency, he'd continue the war"?
Although the people have to choose between the plague and cholera x)
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: *floats*
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *tries to make a balloon[Chimes]*
Couldn't help myself =3
2008-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: He'd have to continue the war... we're in too deep right now to suddenly pull out completely.
2008-09-30 [Eloura]: *ghosts in*
2008-09-30 [HardRockAngel]: *greets the ghost*
Ghosts seem to be very popular today =P


And about the war: You should'v acted like switzerland: always neutral =3
2008-09-30 [Imperator]: Bah.
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: I'm no ghost! I am an illusion.
2008-09-30 [twitchboy]: um....ok nuetral after a terrorist attack? then we go after the ones who claimed to do it....i agree we shouldnt be trying to stabalize it but then again if we went in destroyed it and left that would make us look bad.
2008-09-30 [Amish Hammer]: no, is anybody taking bets on the chicken and dagger fight.
2008-09-30 [Chimes]: Who cares what people think? *valient illusion pose*
2008-10-01 [twitchboy]: um maybe the our own roosevelt document were it says war cant be our foreign policy, but help can
2008-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, jerks! What's with the no commenting?! ...get to work! ...*sits in his office, doing nothing to help with the comment crisis*... *considers injecting 700 billion comments into the wiki to help out*...
2008-10-01 [HardRockAngel]: *makes an "on strike!-sign"*
2008-10-01 [Imperator]: *makes a bomb*
2008-10-01 [HardRockAngel]: *draws katana*
2008-10-01 [Imperator]: *draws a landscape*
2008-10-01 [HardRockAngel]: *points*
Copy-cat! ...Sort of =P
2008-10-01 [Imperator]: *copies a cat* *cat breaks copy machine* Stupid cat!
2008-10-01 [Amish Hammer]: how'd you get the cat to fit under that lil' press down top thing on the copier?
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: ... Will you promise not press animal cruelty charges?
2008-10-02 [Amish Hammer]: depends, if the cat pissed all over everything then i've prolly thought of it myself.
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: 0.0 No, the cat just bled all over the copy machine.
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *scrapes the cat up*... *tosses it into the soup*... If I were you, I would've flattened that thing with a shovel first... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: The shovel imprints would've been copied in the image I made.
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Not if you flattened the cat's back and copied it's front. The imprints wouldn't be seen... believe me... I've been copying cats for years. I even have my CCD (Cat Copying Degree)...
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: Huh, really? I didn't know that. Probably because my degree is in building rat armor. Makes 'em impossible to flatten and they pay me well.
2008-10-02 [Amish Hammer]: i didn't know this diner served chinese. cept for mort's ramen i never found anything else on the menu.
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: Your face should be on the menu; it's just as disgusting as everything else here... Ooooooooo! BURN!
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *suddenly screams strange oriental sounding words*... *stabs self with a knife*... *is dead*...
2008-10-02 [Amish Hammer]: ouch, dude that hurt. just like everything else served here i guess i come burnt too.
2008-10-02 [Duke Devlin]: No, [Chimes], you are not an illusion. *Disullusions you* :P GEORGIE is what you'd call an illusion.., no wait.. that's DElusion. :P
Also.. *stabs Imperator*
2008-10-02 [Chimes]: I am an illusion here. :P I don't exist here...
No she isn't >.< She DOES exist.


Hahaha...
2008-10-02 [Duke Devlin]: LIES. You are right there! *jabs you in the... foot*
Lies again! Why you are a mighty liar today! :O
>=D
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *pops in*
Hi everybody =)
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: *shoves out*
Goodbye Angel
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *throws you with an O Goshi-throw*
Don't. Ever. Do. That. Again.
*follows trough with a chokehold*


=P
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: *poof...shadow clone folloed up with roundhouse kick to the chest*
Make me :P
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *sneaks in, not wanting to be harmed* Dx...
2008-10-02 [Chimes]: Better be the left foot. XD
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: CHIYA!
*uses momentum from kick to tackle into Inazuma*
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *attacks Cid whilst he is busy picking on Inazuma*
*Uses an Ippon Seoi Nage and follows trough with an O Ushiro Ukime*


Hey, I play fair! So should you =3
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *smashed to the ground* URGH... x_x *covers head while everything is going nuts above her*
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: I do play fair Angel ^^ *throws poision gas*
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *takes out stickybomb and skillfully throws it at you, whilst pulling out a gasmask*


Yh right >_>
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Oh that's really fair. *gas mask* ^-^
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: *poison darts Inazuma*
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *deflects with a giant iron fist* OH YEAH! *falls over because the fist is too heavy*
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: *paper fan to the back of the head*
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *Takes both Sai from gurdle and leaps towards Cid, viciously stabbing, whilst trying to deflect counterattacks*
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *dies*
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts on a fake Osama beard*... *bursts in through the window, with a bomb strapped on*... Alalalalalala!! April Foo- *gets gunned down by fifteen of Hedda's armed body guards*
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *comes back to life just to see all of that* Holy turdcicles.
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *points and laughs*
=3
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: *retreats back to the batcave*
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *pfsheesh*
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: *[Imperator]'s Grand Legionary Army learns of his death at the hands of [Duke Devlin]* She killed your Imperator! Seek her out and exact our vengeance! *army raises war shout and scatters to search*
2008-10-02 [HardRockAngel]: *flies up to have a good view over the battlefield*
*is holding bowl of popcorn*
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: There she is! Behind that cactus! *points at the calm, clear ocean*
2008-10-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: O_o... I want some pop cooorn... ^-^?
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: *Army assassinates Mort for leading an entire battalion to their watery graves*
2008-10-02 [Thunder Cid]: BAM!
*snipes Angel in the back of head*
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *dies*... it was totally worth it!
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: *Army loses cohesion and becomes a massive rioting mass. With guns, tanks, artillary, and heavy bombers...*
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *chants*... Fight! Fight!
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: *Croud of army thugs bludgeon you to death with the butt ends of a thousand muskets*
2008-10-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yo, britches!
2008-10-02 [Chimes]: *Crowd
:P
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: Oops... *feels dumb*
2008-10-02 [Chimes]: Wow.. what does Dumb feel like? I've heard that he's gritty.
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom's gritty!
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: Looks like you need to install a new button...
2008-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... a kill switch.
2008-10-02 [Imperator]: That sounds... deathly.
2008-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Deathly delicious! ...*eats death ramen*...
2008-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Round up the townfolk! There's rumor of a monster in that there cave! ...*gets a torch and pitchfork*... *marches toward Misty's house*...
2008-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... this is ridiculous... What am I thinking...? ...*gets out a semi-automatic rifle*... this is much better for killing monsters! *fires at Misty*
2008-10-03 [Imperator]: *Witchcraft brings me back to life* *Legions gather to my banner once again!*
Kill those peasants!
2008-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*peasants just stand there, staring*...
2008-10-03 [nokaredes]: ...ü! *is late with that*
2008-10-03 [HardRockAngel]: *sees clone getting shot*
*Shoots poisonous darts at [Thunder Cid]*
2008-10-03 [Thunder Cid]: *takes cover behind a rock*
2008-10-03 [HardRockAngel]: *swiftly attacks you in the back, shooting poisonous darts -yet again-*
=P
2008-10-03 [Thunder Cid]: -POOF!-
*fires minivan at Angel*
2008-10-03 [HardRockAngel]: *flaps wings and evades*
*swoops down, holding sai*
2008-10-03 [Thunder Cid]: *rolls under log with a grenade strapped to chest*
BRING IT ON!
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: NO! Not my log! I just bought that thing!
2008-10-04 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: ha ha fuck you all its over *pushes the big red button* haha the nukes from all over the world, bye
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *snipes [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]*
Game over, try again >=)
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: Hey! I'm the button person! No stealing my Buttons!
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *calmes [Chimes]*
No-one is stealing your Buttons =P
*guards them*
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: They better not be stealing my buttons.
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: Well, I sniped the one who did, so case closed =p
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals your buttons*
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *snipes Mort*
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *shields himself with the buttons*
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: -POOF-
*attacks from behind*
2008-10-04 [Thunder Cid]: *kicks Angel in the teeth*
RUN MORT!
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *stands there*
2008-10-04 [Thunder Cid]: Run with the button hurry!
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *kicks Cid where it REALLY hurts*
*steals buttons back*
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Button? *breaks button in half*... you mean this thing? ...*shrugs*... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-04 [Thunder Cid]: *falls over fetal position*
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *loses interest in button*
*eats sushi and copyright-infringes*
2008-10-04 [Thunder Cid]: *flops off of the ground and hits hits Angel in her lady junk*
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *blinks twice, cringes a little*
*Returns the -ahem- favour and kicks hard(er)*
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: Y-y-you broke my button! *sniffles*
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: *hands glue*
=S
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: *takes it and grabs the pieces of her button*
2008-10-04 [Thunder Cid]:    *dies*
2008-10-04 [HardRockAngel]: Secret Santa 2008, because everybody loves Christmas =)
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Bah humbug!
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: I love that phrase... but I also love Christmas.
2008-10-04 [Imperator]: That's... an oxymoron.
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: Not really... that phrase doesn't have to always be Christmas related. Plus, it is possible to love both.
2008-10-04 [Imperator]: Just go with it.
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: Nah. :P Where'd the fun be in that?
2008-10-04 [Imperator]: I'll take your buttons!
2008-10-04 [Chimes]: You won't find them... I stashed them away... and you will never know where they are.
2008-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Quick! Check that drawer labeled "buttons"!
2008-10-05 [Imperator]: Damn! It's just full of batons...
2008-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn that illiterate label-maker!
2008-10-05 [Imperator]: He's ill?
2008-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes. Very ill... he has AIDS.
2008-10-05 [Thunder Cid]: He has the AIDS!
2008-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Everyone has AIDS AIDS AIDS!
2008-10-05 [Thunder Cid]: I named my Charlie.
2008-10-05 [Amish Hammer]: at least he doesn't have gonnorrherpesyphilaids
2008-10-05 [Amish Hammer]: that should be on the menu, deep fried, shouldn't it?
2008-10-05 [Imperator]: If AIDS is deep fried, it'll probably be dead which is no good. Bob's Diner has a tradition of serving live meals!
2008-10-05 [Amish Hammer]: u ever had AIDS? that shit's hard to kill!
2008-10-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in with a tree in his hand*... quick! This tree needs some medical attention! ...*bandages up the leaking sap*...
2008-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets chainsaw*... it's time to operate. ...*eats pre-surgery ramen*...
2008-10-05 [Imperator]: Oh no! We're losing it! *splashes water on roots*
2008-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *injects it with Miracle Grow*... oh no! It's not breathing!
2008-10-05 [Imperator]: *performs CPR*
2008-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *strips off the bark*... *shocks it with a defibrillator*... *tree catches on fire*...
2008-10-05 [Imperator]: *shrieks* We don't have marshmallows!!
2008-10-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it! ...*uses Misty instead*... yeech! This marshmallow sucks!
2008-10-06 [Imperator]: Wait, I had two marshmallows here in my pocket all along...
2008-10-06 [Duke Devlin]: Darn it Imperator! >=O Why!?!?!?
2008-10-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Knowledge=power, so therefore, power=knowledge. Steroids=power, so steroids=knowledge. *takes a bunch of 'roids*... I'm a genius!
2008-10-07 [twitchboy]: then yours balls shrink and your voice sounds like screech from saved by the bell
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright!
2008-10-07 [twitchboy]: and the tissue in your heart fails as it burst open instantly killing you, your muscle tussue actually start to eat themslfs in an attempt to gain more atp energy and the extra protei builds up in your blood and forms a clot in your brain! wait thats bad right?
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Awesome! ...*takes more 'roids*... *gets angry and punches Misty*...
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2008-10-07 [nokaredes]: ...you guys don't talk enough! I demand to see over 9000 new comments on this page before I log back in next time!
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Only?! ...*sits in chair*... *whips Imperator*... get to commenting!
2008-10-07 [Thunder Cid]: *joins in and beat Imp with a rabbit*
2008-10-07 [Duke Devlin]: SPAMS.
2008-10-07 [Duke Devlin]: I spam you further. :) *SPAMS*
2008-10-07 [HardRockAngel]: *Spams*
I know, I'm a copy-cat =D
2008-10-07 [Thunder Cid]: *snipes spammers*
2008-10-07 [HardRockAngel]: *glares at Cid*
2008-10-07 [Thunder Cid]: *takes off running*
2008-10-07 [HardRockAngel]: *grins*
At least I didn't kick you   
2008-10-07 [Thunder Cid]: True ^^
*snipes*
2008-10-07 [HardRockAngel]: *glares even more*
2008-10-07 [Thunder Cid]: *runs even further*
2008-10-07 [HardRockAngel]: *grins even more*
2008-10-07 [Imperator]: *KILLS YOU ALL FOR DISRESPECTING AN IMPERATOR!*
2008-10-07 [Thunder Cid]: *hologram*
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *holocrine*... ha ha! Nerd jokes... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-07 Jay: Hello,I got a e-mail from a guy called Turkey and he told me to come here.
2008-10-07 Jay: I commented so I'm outta here.PEACE!*peace sign*
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: There goes Misty again... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-07 [Chimes]: Same typing style and everything...
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...tisk tisk... *eats ramen with a knife*...
2008-10-07 [Imperator]: Jay? Jay Gatsby?! Oh my god! You're so cool.......GIVE ME ALL YOUR MONEY!
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet, you! Go back to your East Egg!
2008-10-07 [Imperator]: *finds someone's wife to have an affair with*
2008-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*goes for a swim in his pool*...
2008-10-08 [Paul Doyle]: *a radiation-mutated ramen monster rises from a coolant lake next to a really leaky nuclear plant, and heads towards Mort's pool*
2008-10-08 [twitchboy]: *jumps in lake then explodes out glowing and flying around* Freakin sweet! im a super heroe now! *flies over and playfully sucker punches mort but accidnetally blows him through the pool floor and through fifty feet of solid bedrock*  
2008-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... I don't recall superheroes and mutant monsters in the Great Gatsby... *eats ramen*... in Great Expectations, yeah, but not The Great Gatsby...
2008-10-09 [twitchboy]: well, you were going to get shot by a mechanic anyway so i dont see how it matters, this was a better ending. It didnt piss me off when i read it like the book did
2008-10-09 [Imperator]: Has anyone seen the movie version? That's pretty good too. Of course Daisy seems a little psychotic and starts crying when Gatsby shows her how many shirts he owns...
2008-10-09 [Paul Doyle]: 42! Whoops, wrong book and wrong movie . . .
2008-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*moves into the seldom heard of North Egg*...
2008-10-09 [HardRockAngel]: o.O
This is a weird, weird wiki...
2008-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I fail to see the weirdness... *eats ramen*... *swats at the buzzards trying to eat the food*... Hey! Stupid buzzards! I scraped this food off the street fair and square! Get your own!
2008-10-09 [Imperator]: *tosses Mort into oncoming traffic* *scrapes Mort up*
2008-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *buzzards attack me*
2008-10-09 [Imperator]: *pushes buzzards into oncoming skycar traffic on Coruscant*
2008-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *buzzard corpses fall onto an unsuspecting crowd of people below*
2008-10-09 [Imperator]: *scrapes up buzzards*
2008-10-09 [twitchboy]: I am the encentric trillionair sir twitchy the eleventh here to drink my ass off and score some hot scandelous love at mr. gatsby's party. Which way to the poon room?
2008-10-09 [Imperator]: *points to the Sarlacc pit*
2008-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *dives into the pit*... I'm a-comin', ladies!
2008-10-10 [twitchboy]: I thank you kind sir...*Dives in* Money and ass, what else could a guy ask for? *Slapps a hot chics butt.*
2008-10-10 [Imperator]: *You both get painfully devoured over the course of 1000 years*
2008-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOO!! ...there's no women in here!
2008-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Dow fell below 9,000! ...down 40% since this time last year... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-10 [Paul Doyle]: I'm REALLY scared to check up on my 401(K)which I've been contributing 10% pre-tax to, religiously since the start of 1995. It's 2/3 aggressive growth funds (primarily European-based) and 1/3 bonds.
2008-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWS-FoXbjVI
2008-10-11 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: v
2008-10-11 [Imperator]: w
2008-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of which, I gotta go watch that movie next week... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-11 [Imperator]:
x
y
z
2008-10-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yo le odio Mort
2008-10-11 [Imperator]: Que?
2008-10-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Odio Pingüino mortificado
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: Odio? No se odio.
2008-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Burro
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: ... "Yo creo que Mort es un odio."
2008-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: sí él es
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: Tu Espanol es horrible! Ooooooo! En tu cara! No, yo es jk-ing. :D
2008-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ¡Cállese!
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: Ouch!
2008-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol *disappears*
2008-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*come ramen*... Tu madre, Misty...


And on that note, the fact that Misty's letters contain the correct diacritic marks means that she's obviously using an online translator. And from the looks of the translations, I'd wager she's using... babelfish, perhaps? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: Or she could be taking the time to get the symbols off of Microsoft Word and pasting them into the comment box. But that seems unlikely compared to your hypothesis.
2008-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Indeed. Besides... Misty is far too lazy and knows far too little about Spanish to arrange the diacritic marks correctly.
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: Excellent point, sir.
2008-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm in spainish class this year,so I'm learning more about spanish.Love Ya,bye!*blows everyone a kiss and leaves*
2008-10-12 [HardRockAngel]: I'm having spanisch class too this year. Though I didn't understand a thing from the chit-chatter in the above comments xD
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: Spanish? Check out the Spanish Classroom!
2008-10-12 [HardRockAngel]: Gracias, [Imperator] =)
2008-10-12 [Imperator]: De nada. :D
2008-10-12 [HardRockAngel]: De donde es? =)
2008-10-12 [Duke Devlin]: 'Love ya'? D: Now that's scary! *Fends off offensive kisses*
2008-10-13 [Imperator]: Your face is offensive to look at! Oooooooo! BURN!
2008-10-13 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Holy cow, that's a biiig eggplant.
2008-10-13 [HardRockAngel]: *throws a match at [Imperator]*
Uhm...BURN! =p
2008-10-13 [twitchboy]: omg! its george lucas!....wait nevermind its just some old guy in a star wars shirt
2008-10-13 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my god! Your monkey is on fire! :O
2008-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... quite a dilemma we have here... I say we put it out with more fire. *splashes gasoline on the monkey*
2008-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Monkey?! ...is that some sort of racial slur?!
2008-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yes.
2008-10-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh... alright then...
2008-10-14 [twitchboy]: hmm lemurs are cooler
2008-10-15 [Duke Devlin]: Lemurs are NOT in fact 'cooler'. They are often far higher in temperature than the average monkey, I'll have you know, you ignorant twitchy boy.
2008-10-15 [Chimes]: *clicks* Mmmmmm-hmmmm!
2008-10-15 [Duke Devlin]: Damn Sterrrr-aight!
2008-10-15 [Chimes]: :P You go, girl. XD
2008-10-15 [Imperator]: You insignificant insects! My class voted overwhelmingly for me in our mock presidential election! The opposition could only mumble responses that were copying my answers!
2008-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Please... I've been elected both senior class president and SGA president this year. I crushed the opposition with good ol' fashioned slandering.
2008-10-16 [twitchboy]: but lemurs are in fact more interesting and damand more respect since they predate monkeys in evolution
2008-10-16 [Chimes]: But monkeys... are awesome. Especially Spider Monkeys.
2008-10-16 [twitchboy]: But lemurs are more interesting
2008-10-16 [Chimes]: >.> I'm not seeing it.
2008-10-16 [twitchboy]: lemurs wont maul you, and their teeth wont shread your skin, monkeys are naturally mean
2008-10-16 [Paul Doyle]: I'd say, look to South America for animal motivation. Llamas . . . capybaras . . . guinea pigs . . . macaws . . .


(There's plenty of llamas on Elftown, it would seem :P)
2008-10-16 [Eloura]: *moves back in*
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: *sees [Eloura] move back in*
Need a hand? =)
2008-10-16 [Eloura]: Please!
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: *helps a hand*
What is in these boxes? o.O
2008-10-16 [Eloura]: *grins* Assorted items
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: =p
2008-10-16 [Eloura]: Yea! *wild grin and say's* Soo what have i missed
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: Mort and Misty fighting.
Me and Cid glaring/Sniping/kicking*


Random silliness =p
2008-10-16 [Eloura]: Ahh the normal!! *grins* I missed out all the fun *pouts*
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: I think you can join in though ;)
And Cid started a rant =p
2008-10-16 [Eloura]: Ohh i can join in now! Awesome! *big grin* Rants rock!
2008-10-16 [Imperator]: What's "SGA" stand for?
2008-10-16 [Thunder Cid]: Student Government Association.
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: *is bored*
Where is the silliness? o.O
2008-10-16 [Duke Devlin]: *bitch-slaps y'all*
2008-10-16 [HardRockAngel]: *Is bitch-slapped*
Hey! =p
*slaps back*
2008-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *whips it out*
2008-10-16 [twitchboy]: *breaks out in a remdition on journey* Just a small town boy, born and raised in south detroit, took a mid night bus going anywhere
2008-10-16 [Thunder Cid]: Snipes Angel
2008-10-17 [Imperator]: *Drafts everyone into my Imperial Army and turns your aggression on the enemy (Obama)*
2008-10-17 [Lothuriel]: Hello all...'sup?
2008-10-17 [twitchboy]: Blah! *raises underground army of Twitchopolis* I will be fuhrer! *marches army on washington* Kill them all spare no politician, except colin powell, i like him
2008-10-17 [HardRockAngel]: *revolts against [Imperator]*
O-ba-ma! O-ba-ma!! =P
You should check out the link in mt diary. I have a feeling you might like it =)
2008-10-17 [twitchboy]: please tell me your not voting for that dumbass? sure I prefer to have someone else besides McCain but he is a better pick


i also have a huge list on why you shouldnt vote for obama
2008-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]: McCain rules! ...*eats ramen*... Obama eats puppies.
2008-10-17 [Lothuriel]: Check out this spammage! spam's polls, feel free to delete if you like Mort!
2008-10-17 [Imperator]: You fools! Obama is the scourge of Washington!
2008-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Everyone knows the democrats just want Biden in charge, so once they get Obama into office, they'll kill him off!
2008-10-18 [Imperator]: *Gasp!*
2008-10-18 [Paul Doyle]:  For great justice!
2008-10-18 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm.. I know nothing about the American election, so therefore I feel it necessary to add my 'two cents' - or whatever that damn phrase is. If we are to believe the rumours spread by our own dear Mort, (that Barrack Obama does in fact consume puppies, and McCain 'rules'), then surely it is clear who we - we meaning the American citizens - should vote for. Our very own [Mortified Penguin] should go in for the running, at this late stage, and usurp whoever is in the lead's place! I wholeheartedly feel that if he were to do so, he would win by no small margin!
All mispellings placed within the above text are intentional, as we all know that Americans spell stuff wrong.
2008-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe I already am in the running... sadly, the Ramen Party doesn't seem to be fairing too well this year... Four years ago, we stepped aside and let Bush win, 'cause we knew he'd be a great prez.! ...this year, we just can't beat Obama... if it wasn't for Satan helping him, we would have won this thing.
2008-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Also... Americans spell things the way God meant them to be spelled! Without all them there annoying 'u's in the middle of everything... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-19 [Chimes]: >.>
2008-10-19 [Imperator]: How dar yah insuelt mah spellin'! I is an 'merican! Yuh can't do this tuh me! Foo'.
2008-10-19 [Duke Devlin]: XD Well, okay, you don't all spell things terribly.. However, when you decided to mutilate our beautiful language by changing 's's to 'z's (which, by the way, is pronounced 'zed' not 'zee'), a great many deceased Britons turned in their graves. ;) Other such errors give the same effect I am afraid. ;)
2008-10-19 [Duke Devlin]: Also - The Ramen Party must be a very.. noble one, I am sure. :P
2008-10-19 [Imperator]: Britain no longer rules this land! America can do whatever it pleases with its language! And personally, I think "colour" is a stupid way to spell "color."
2008-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, it's the same in Spanish, too! (Color)
2008-10-21 [whitehot]: .......im a ninja <_< >_> but youll never know
2008-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2008-10-22 [Thunder Cid]: o.O
2008-10-22 [twitchboy]: Well im the elected cadidate for the Capitolistic Democratic republic of socialists party or CaDRes for short, dont you recognize our symbol? Its a doughnut, yeah we put that on the moon Mimas for advertising, i see its working
2008-10-22 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh you and your useless spelling problems. ;) Our language first, damnit! XD
Oh well, spell how you please. I don't have to type it, so I'm fine. ;)
Also.. XD Interesting. XD
2008-10-22 Misty: Hi
2008-10-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?!
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I could take over huggers united if I wanted... but I am no longer interested in the forceful takeover, as I already achieved my goals here on Elfytown... now I'm bored around here... maybe I should go start some trouble... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: Oh come on. Raise an army and crush the huggers!
2008-10-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *glares*I'm a part of that wiki
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: KILL THE HUGGERS! *grabs pitchfork*
2008-10-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Take a look at the pic...


  

2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: An army isn't necessary... I have inside information and could take it at any time. I found a lot of important things recently... I'll give you a hint as to what they were: (censored). ...*eats ramen*...
2008-10-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: members?
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: O.o how did you...
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm good like that. Now, to be safe, I'll get rid of that little hint... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: Oh no I want to know how you did that and what else you are capable of doing.
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: What's it to you? I'm capable of anything on Elftown, 'cause I've spent so much time messing with things here... other sites, not so much... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: But that's private info...are you hedda's alter ego?
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah... I hate the Swedish. (Hedda, if you read that, I don't hate the Swedish! I think they're great!)... but yeah... screw the Swedish. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: XD
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it... I have to label all the bones on a test tomorrow... screw you guys! I'm going to study! ...oh, who am I kidding... I'm going to watch TV and play my guitar... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: And remember, kids... happiness is a warm gun.
2008-10-23 [Imperator]: Warmed from firing at liberals, that is. JK Liberals shouldn't die because then they couldn't see Obama get defeated on Nov 4! XD
2008-10-23 [twitchboy]: lol.....mort what was that hint? i missed it
2008-10-23 [Imperator]: Yeah! Me too!
2008-10-23 [Thunder Cid]: Twitch don't worry about that :P
2008-10-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah it's all in the past.
2008-10-23 [Paul Doyle]: I have some wikis to sacrifice to Penguin Takeover . . .
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Give 'em! *grabs greedily*
2008-10-23 [Paul Doyle]: All righty, I'll message you, and change the ownership while I'm at it.
2008-10-23 [Paul Doyle]: I sent them, and there may be more yet to come . . . I have a LOT of old crappy/abandoned wikis from when I was far more active on the ET wikis, than I am now.
2008-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody's active on Elftown anymore...
2008-10-23 [Chimes]: I am. ^^
2008-10-24 [Paul Doyle]: Yeah, it just isn't what it used to be, but if we start acting as a community again, maybe some good things will happen. I'm still in the process of cutting down a lot of my ET activity (shedding myself of old wikis, and such) and generally being more choosy about the places I frequent, anymore.
2008-10-24 [Duke Devlin]: I TRY to be active. XD But I have an external life as well. :P But of course, Elftown is the number one place to be, it being the place I met some of my best mates EVER. :D
Wow that was cheesey. -___-
Love you Len. ^^
Also, Mort, you too! :D XD
*snaps out of the cheesey mode*
Moving on..., I feel that for Mort to merely take wikis like that, is simply too easy. There should be more of a challenge in it. XD But, I suppose you take what you can get nowadays.
2008-10-24 [Paul Doyle]: Well hell, I've got at least a dozen more I'll give away without shedding a bloody tear, if the demand's there. I'm just nowhere near as involved as I used to be, and I don't regret it. :P
2008-10-24 [playa 101]: yo
2008-10-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I can't put them in the conquered section... I'll probably make a charity section...
2008-10-24 Misty: hello
2008-10-25 [whitehot]: ............. <_< >_> im a ninja... i will eat all your kidneys
2008-10-25 [Chimes]: Why kidneys?
2008-10-26 [Lethan]: Becuase he already ate your livers.
2008-10-27 [Daring Silence]: *sad violin music*


I have neither kidney nor liver.
2008-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I have extra. ...*scratches fourth kidney*...
2008-10-28 [Paul Doyle]:   
2008-10-28 [Fearathress]: lol nice
2008-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: One mo' week!
2008-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... darn Elftown... with it's decline in activity... now Bob's Diner is suffering too. Perhaps we should relocate our operations to Myspace.
2008-10-29 [Chimes]: Or... you could advertise Elftown a bit?
2008-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Already tried... nobody cares.
2008-10-29 [Chimes]: Make them care. :P Use those amazing powers of yours.
2008-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: My powers and I don't feel like trying... we're lazy.
2008-10-29 [Chimes]: Well. I am at a loss on what to say.
2008-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'm bored... I'm going to read random past comments... *eats ramen*...
2008-10-29 [Duke Devlin]: Effort. XD Well, please don't move to myspace, it's no fun. XD By comparison, anyway. ;)
XD
Also... *spams Elftown*
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Four days to go... it doesn't look good for the ramen party. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-11-02 [Keir Devlin]: wtf are we talking about?
And, hey, I like McCain...
D:
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: McCain rules!
2008-11-02 [Keir Devlin]: Fo sho.
2008-11-02 [Thunder Cid]: Oh yeah!
2008-11-02 [Paul Doyle]: I'd sooner vote for a clone of Abraham Lincoln . . . or maybe a clone of Martin van Buren for that matter :P
  

2008-11-02 [twitchboy]: for the future of our country don't vote obama


1. He supports infanticide, literally!


2. His spiritual mentor for 20 years has been Jeremiah Wright whom Obama personally chose out of many Chicago pastors. It strains credibility that he didn’t know about Wright’s views. He listened to tapes of Rev. Wright when he was at Harvard Law! So why did he choose him and stick with him for so long? The only possible explanation is that he approved of Wright’s tirades.


3. He is a close friend of William Ayers and Bernadine Dorhn, unrepentant Weather Underground terrorists.


4. He is a target for assassination, not because he is black but because he is a Muslim apostate, according to devout Muslims around the world. Therefore, he cannot be a good Chief Diplomat to the Middle East.


5. He was mentored by a communist.


6. His economic plan will harm the US economy and create more fiscal irresponsibility with the Congressional Budget. Why do we want to return to the days of Jimmy Carter?


7. He is in favor of unilateral disarmament, leaving America defenseless against its enemies.


8. He is unaccomplished. He hasn’t really done anything of worth relative to the office of the US presidency. He’s only been in the Senate for about two years (assumed in office Jan of 2005 and announced his candidacy for the presidency in Feb 2007). One can’t be simultaneously a full-time senator and a full-time presidential candidate. Soon he will have campaigned for almost as long as he has been in the Senate.


9. He is willing to personally meet with hostile dictators like Hugo Chavez and Ahmadinejad with no preconditions. They don’t deserve such a privilege of meeting the President of the USA. Reagan negotiated from a position of strength, when he thought he could gain something. What does Obama hope to gain?


10. Three other people: Tony Rezko, Eric Holder, Jim Johnson. Why does Obama associate with such shady characters?


http://www.culturejamforlife.com/nobama2008/
2008-11-02 [Keir Devlin]: :D
We had political debates and I slaped most of those facts in the Obama parties face.
<3
2008-11-02 [twitchboy]: heres one i just got from my uncle he owns a small business and he found something that proves that obama talks nice but is really a dumb fuck when it comes to government, he talk all nice and says he wants to give small business's corperate tax cuts to improve the economy.....like i said my uncle owns a small business...small business's dont pay mother fricking corperate taxes to begin with so how can they get a tax cut on something they dont even pay? But to the average jo who doesnt know any better it sounds like obama is a smart man looking out fot the middle class....bull shit
2008-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: XD I know NOTHING about this, but again... *spams love for the Ramen party*
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: One of the days I'm going to become a billionaire... then I'll mass advertise the Ramen Party and try to become the first third party president in a long time. ...either that, or I'll blow it all on drugs, gambling, and prostitutes. ...yeah... definitely prostitutes. ...*eats ramen*...
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: 'Bama is number one, son! http://sports.espn.go.com/ncf/rankingsindex
2008-11-02 [Thunder Cid]: Oh geez. Sooners are 6.
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Sooners suck.
2008-11-02 [Thunder Cid]: Those be fighting words mort. *pulls out shotgun*
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out a Misty*... *throws it at you*...
2008-11-02 [Thunder Cid]: Ack! *shoots wildly*
2008-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *helps you shoot the Misty*
2008-11-03 [Imperator]: You can't shoot mist, the bullets fly right through... Ha. Ha. Ha.
2008-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Unless I use really big bullets! They can hit anything! ...*randomly fires a bazooka*... *takes out Nok*...
2008-11-03 [Araglas]:   
2008-11-03 [Chimes]: HELP THE HERALD
GO!
2008-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: SPAM! Oh dear Emma! D: :O :P
No spamming, deary. :P
OHHH I am reporting someone. >:)
Not you! XD Don't worry. :P
I love reporting. :D Don't you? XD
Jk. ;)
2008-11-03 [Chimes]: I do...:P I do it a lot.
It's good spam though. :P
2008-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: XD Same. :)
Shuup! No spam is good! >:O
2008-11-03 [Chimes]: It's important spam. :P
2008-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: PAH! :O
2008-11-03 [Chimes]: Baaaah to recasting and commentary.
2008-11-03 [Duke Devlin]: I quite agree. I am about to finish that now. D:
2008-11-03 [Chimes]: I am Commentary-ing.
2008-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...eat at Bob's Diner!
2008-11-04 [twitchboy]: fried spam is best
2008-11-04 [zankou]: i just got my first eveh elftown badge! check it out!!! [zankou]
2008-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You call that a badge? ...check out my collection, son!
2008-11-05 [twitchboy]: badges are nice...but how many of you have a state championship ring? Raise your hand....oh just me?
2008-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: F****** West coast! ...with their big fancy states... and their douche liberals... *eats ramen*... stinkin' Obama...
2008-11-05 [Thunder Cid]: WE ARE DOOOOOOMED!
2008-11-05 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: do you remeber me fuckers?
2008-11-05 [Paul Doyle]:  What's in Sarah Palin's future?
2008-11-05 [twitchboy]: i voted...and lost


All im going to do now is sit back and watch the democrates run this country in the ground. Then sit there atop a mound of smoldering rubble and laugh, spreading my arms wide and say "See what you voted for you ignorant masses?"   
2008-11-05 [Chimes]: Or you could just accept things and make the best of your life...
2008-11-05 [Thunder Cid]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
2008-11-05 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Do you all really think we are screwed/doomed/gunna blow up? I think so x_x
2008-11-05 [Thunder Cid]: Second that one.
2008-11-06 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: You and I can relate... considering we both live in the same place. If he gets rid of coal mines...
2008-11-06 [Thunder Cid]: I know. Well I have a bit of advice for him. He better bring his biggest slings and arrows coming in here.
2008-11-06 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Oh you know it. I'll team up with you. XD
2008-11-06 [Thunder Cid]: But in all honesty I think I'm seriously fucked. My military career, business, and investments are all on the line now.
2008-11-06 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Yeah, I know. Same here. I know exactly how you are feeling. I'm wondering how the heck I'm going to support my family, when I loose the little job I have, because of the 'small business' and when my husband looses his because of the coal mining.
2008-11-06 [Thunder Cid]: It will be total hell on earth.
2008-11-06 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Yeah, consider half of America's energy comes from coal... oh... excuse me... half of the world.
2008-11-06 [twitchboy]: My state has the highest gas taxes in the nation...and some of the worst unemployment.....all i hope is that he bans alcohol to "make the nation better" because hell hath no fury like a million pissed off sober rednecks
2008-11-06 [Thunder Cid]: Hey now watch the remarks. I enjoy alcohol too ya know.
2008-11-06 [twitchboy]: i do to, im saying he is writing his death wish when he does...and it was one of his campaign pushes
2008-11-06 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Hee hee
2008-11-06 [Imperator]: Obama's ideas really freak me out. There is no better way to ruin an economy than to raise taxes on employers so they'll have to fire all their employees. Not to mention he has no idea how to deal with foreign policy issues. I'm terrified he will make us lose in Iraq just so he can be right...
2008-11-06 [twitchboy]: like i said sit back and laugh...get on with a personal life
2008-11-06 [Thunder Cid]: New rule: No talking about war. It's not always black and white over there, I know this from personal experience.
2008-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of war, I certainly hope he doesn't try to pull the troops out before we're done over there... if so, the Iraqis will end up even worse off than they were before. At least we still get a few more months of Bush... *eats ramen*...
2008-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid media... they keep claiming that Obama didn't get much support in the southern states because of all the racial tension that still remains. That's not the reason at all. We didn't vote for him because he's a douche, not because he's black.
2008-11-06 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: go to hell!!!!
2008-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *points and laughs at [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]*
2008-11-06 [Amish Hammer]: yeah but i hear douchey is coming back into style
2008-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: XD Hahaha NICE Mort. :D Love it. :P
To this; That's not the reason at all. We didn't vote for him because he's a douche, not because he's black.
:P NICE. :D
2008-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of which, I wonder when Nok gets out of basic training... *eats ramen*..
2008-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: I fail to see.. Oh wait, I see it now. XD
Well, we shall have to wait and find out, won't we?
2008-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps. ...or I could go back through my messages and find when she told me...
2008-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: XD That would certainly be a better plan.
2008-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2008-11-07 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Pokemanz for everyone.
2008-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2008-11-08 [Thunder Cid]: XD
2008-11-08 [Paul Doyle]: Now someone test Palin's geography skills xD
2008-11-09 [Duke Devlin]: XD Hhaa niiice
2008-11-12 [Paul Doyle]: Desert Island Discs is where you can answer the time-honored question: "If you were stranded on a deserted island, which albums would you bring with you, and why?"
2008-11-12 [Chimes]: XD
2008-11-12 [Duke Devlin]: XD NONE! Because I would likely have nothing to play them on. :( *sad* However, I am sure that is addressed in that there wiki. ;)
2008-11-13 [Paul Doyle]: Well, you can always pull a "Gilligan's Island" and make shit out of leaves and coconuts and crap salvaged from the "S.S. Minnow" :P
2008-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Sadly, the skipper, the millionaire and his wife, the movie star, and the rest decided to eat Gilligan for his insolence.
2008-11-13 [Thunder Cid]: So like 2 bites each? I would have went for the fat man.
2008-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: He had no meat on his bones though... it was all chewy fat. And his insolence wasn't too bad...
2008-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, I'm off to solicit more losers, I mean, customers... no, wait... I meant losers... *eats ramen*...
2008-11-13 [Thunder Cid]: Have a good one.
2008-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I soitenly will.
2008-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: 'Bama won again. Next we crush Auburn... *eats ramen*...
2008-11-16 [Imperator]: Who's "Auburn"?
2008-11-16 [Paul Doyle]: And for that matter, who is "Bob", and why is he never at his Diner?
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Bob is elusive.. DO NOT QUESTION THE BOB! D:
Or we'll all explode.... o___O
2008-11-16 [Chimes]: EXPLODE?!
2008-11-16 [Imperator]: My eyes explode when I see [Chimes]' face. Ooooooo! BURN!
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Damn straight, Explode! :O QUICKLY! HIDE!
............ >.> *stabs Imperator* .... <.<
2008-11-16 [Araglas]: *walks in dressed like a pirate*
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: Arghh!
2008-11-16 [Imperator]: *collapses on "self-destruct" button and blows up Bob's Diner - again*
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: *is a DiceyPirate*
2008-11-16 [Araglas]: *is sailing on ship over reckage of Bob's diner*


Evil winds be ablowin here....
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: *Is sailing on a plank of wood that looks suspiciously like a table, over the wreckage of Bob's Diner*
Evil sounds be echoin' here...,
:D
2008-11-16 [Araglas]: *looks at Duke and squints an eye*


Be ye a pirate?
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: *Squints right back atcha - which actually hinders vision more than it should* *only has one eye*


Aye! A Pirate I be... Ye be a pirate too? What say ye?
2008-11-16 [Araglas]: *squints and points at self*


Aye, I be a pirate to...smelly the pirate me am!
2008-11-16 [Duke Devlin]: *Nods knowingly, holds out hand*


Nice to meet ye, 'tis! Many a day has passed since I last saw one of me own kind!
2008-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Pirates! *hides the cash register*
2008-11-17 [Araglas]: *takes hand and shakes it*


Aye, tis good to see a bretheren in these dark days'o de sea.


What be ailin him?


*points to mort*
2008-11-17 [Duke Devlin]: *Lobs a small handful of seaweed at Mort's register* ...
No idea., what be ailin' ye, Landlubber!?
2008-11-17 [Chimes]: *is not offended in the slightest, is proud* :P I made Imperator blind... MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA!
2008-11-17 [Imperator]: Argh! You pirate hooker! You blinded me! *stumbles around*
2008-11-17 [Chimes]: The phrase... is 'Brazen Hussy', thank you very much. :P *pushes*
2008-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals Imperator's wallet while he's blinded*
2008-11-18 [Imperator]: No! My wallet! The cell numbers of all my favorite wenches are in there!
2008-11-18 [Thunder Cid]: And by wenches you mean guys named ted. BURN!
2008-11-18 [Imperator]: Nice burn! *high five*
2008-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *calls wench*... *she turns out to be a wrench instead*... *uses her to tighten bolts*...
2008-11-18 [Imperator]: I tightened your mom's bolts last night...
2008-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: My mom is Frankenstein... so that's perfectly alright... *eats ramen*...
2008-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Whereas my mom has bolts on her neck, your mom has nuts on her forehead... ha ha... mechanical humor... *eats ramen with a screwdriver*...
2008-11-18 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: go to hell
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: Well... that was random and unfriendly.
2008-11-18 [Araglas]: Yes it was...I think someone needs a hug and we need to see the barney song!
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: NO PURPLE DINOSAURS!
2008-11-18 [Araglas]: *is dressed as yellow triceratops* I agree!
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: One moment please;
This is a service announcement. Please take in the following information on the edits made to the English language. As of November 18th 2008, the word 'Blinded' has been officially replaced with 'Blound', as we have deemed this to be both more aesthetically pleasing, and easy on the ears. That is all, thank you.
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: XD I should have known you would say that.
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: Yes, yes you should have. *is insulted that you didn't jump in there first, so an announcement wouldn't be necessary*
:P
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: It's this computer... It's disorientating... XD
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: I know! It's cause it's a mac. *shakes head pityingly*
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: As I said to someone earlier... it is trying to enslave my mind... but failing so it hates me.
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: Bwahaah! Power to the Chimesay!
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: *victorious pose*
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: *Is moar victorious than j00!*
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: PAH! I am awash with Victory.
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: Hahahahh you're awash with victory! *mocks*
2008-11-18 [Chimes]: You might mock me now, boy, but I will soon... >.> <.< Shh... it's a secret...
2008-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *plays four finger fillet... not very well though, as is apparent in the missing finger*
2008-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: ... Oh dear... *pokes Mort with a finger*
2008-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes your finger*
2008-11-19 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: purple chickens fly in japu
hahahaha
beat that!!!!!
2008-11-19 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: HOLY... pears.... pears should not have teeth... O_O
2008-11-19 [Araglas]:               
2008-11-19 [twitchboy]: PH34R +H3 P34R5. +H31R P0I/\I3R R0X0R
2008-11-19 [Araglas]: ......  
2008-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Holy Bananas, Batman! That man took my finger!
Like a MAN!
2008-11-19 [Araglas]: Flaming flamingo's batman look at that finger robber go!
2008-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the finger*
2008-11-19 [Araglas]: Holy taco batman that penguine just ate the finger~
2008-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Jumping .. BEANS... Superman! That Penguin just ATE that FINGER!
2008-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha, Batman! You can't beat the Penguin! *shoots wildly with umbrella gun*
2008-11-19 [Araglas]: *looks around for superman*
2008-11-19 [Chimes]: *is suddenly in green and covered in question marks*
2008-11-19 [Araglas]: *gasps* Happy camels Batman its the Riddlers evil side woman Twixter!
2008-11-20 [twitchboy]: *is now dressed like a clown...the old laughing manically insane joker not the new cynically depressed insane joker* Well batsy it looks like the bird made a meal out of your finger hahahaaa...and shut up boy blunder your just not funny
2008-11-20 [Araglas]: *looks at Old Joker* Who asked you? If I wasn't on a show where they framed out the violence I'd show you a thing or two!
2008-11-20 [twitchboy]: You better be glad its consored, a man and a boy alone in a cave sliding up and down a pole in spandex?....yeah nobody knows whats going on there
2008-11-20 [Araglas]: *shrugs* Doesn't reall matter does it? Batman is a much better lay than you anyways.
2008-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: *Twitches* ... CHIMES! FIX IT!!!! :'(
2008-11-20 [Chimes]: Fix what? O.o
2008-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: ... *Sniffle* ... *Twitch* .... ;;;
00:16:48 [twitchboy]: *is now dressed like a clown...the old laughing manically insane joker not the new cynically depressed insane joker*
*wails*
2008-11-20 [Chimes]: Firstly... 'Clinically.' Unless you really did mean 'cynically'... at which point... wuh tuh fuh?
Secondly... Since when was the new Joker depressed?
Thirdly... [Duke Devlin] is the Joker... and no one can take her place.
*nods resolutely*
2008-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: Awhh thank you, Mummy. :) <3
I love you, Chimes. :D
*is all happy now* ^^
Heheh cynically... XD
2008-11-20 [Chimes]: You're welcome, kiddo! <3<3
Love you too, Dicey. :]
2008-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: :D
Yay! :D :D :D
*is a Dicey Pirate* ... *That is loved* :D
2008-11-20 [Chimes]: Mega-loved.
2008-11-20 [Duke Devlin]: ACE! :D
*mutual love* :D
2008-11-20 [Chimes]: *prances around singing the 'I'm more loved than you' song at random people*
2008-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *is a cynically depressed Joker as well*
2008-11-20 [Imperator]: I'm Old Greg! Do you love me?
2008-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Would you like some smooth, creamy Baileys?
2008-11-20 [Thunder Cid]: Yes please ^^
2008-11-21 [Chimes]: Am I sensing Boosh?
2008-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks the bottle of Baileys on the table and brandishes the jagged remains threateningly*... alright! Everyone put your money in this sack! *hold up stereotypical sack with a large green '$' on it*
2008-11-22 [twitchboy]: i ish broke sir....i have a twenty thousand dollar tab on just jack daneils alone here *holds out empty pockets*
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: Hey where I come from that's called alcohol abuse.  
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: Where I come from, your face is visual abuse! Ooooooo! BURN!
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: *slaps taste out of mouth*


I'm sorry did you say something?  
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: Um... Maybe?
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: *draws hand back* Maybe?
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: There's definitely a distinct possibility...
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: *turns ring around* Last chance...
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: Look over there! *runs away*
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: *looks* Oh a chicken!
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: *squints* I just see a potential sandwich...
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: GET IT!


*runs*
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: *tries to tackle the chicken* *misses*
2008-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not a chicken! ...that's a cute little puppy! ......get it! ...*eats ramen with a pitchfork*...
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: DRAT! *pulls out net*
2008-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... you have to be more gentle or you'll bruise the meat... *gets a 12-gauge off the wall*...
2008-11-22 [Imperator]: *Gauges distance and tackles chicken dog* *catches bird-flu*
2008-11-22 [Thunder Cid]: O.o
2008-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *has bird-bronchitis*
2008-11-23 [zankou]: chir*chough*p....lol
2008-11-24 [Daring Silence]: Gross. You are infested with flockination.
2008-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *ribbit*
2008-11-24 [Duke Devlin]: Woah-Noes! D: *throws Chlamydia at you all*
2008-11-25 [spitfire_35121]: It's been a while since I've been on this username... darn guards changed the password... what kind of password is "mindpasswordprotection" anyway? ...*eats ramen*...
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: As you all know, the Ramen Party has failed to gain the presidency yet again this year. Over the next four years, we will campaign and take the white house! ...or at least a piece of it. All we really need is a good sized chunk and we'll be fine...
2008-11-25 [Thunder Cid]: My uncle has a really big hammer.
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Excellent. Now all I need is a shovel, some toothpaste, two pickle jars, a rubber band, some hot sauce, five M-16's, three rocket launcers, and a turtle...
2008-11-25 [Thunder Cid]: Which means I'll need a unicycle, a midget, 10 jellybeans, and an endless track of I like to move it.
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry... I only have 11 jellybeans... *throws all the stuff away*...
2008-11-25 [Thunder Cid]: O_O NOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *burns the pile of stuff for no reason*... *throws in money*...
2008-11-25 [Thunder Cid]: *throws in ramen*
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Nooo! You're over cooking it! *leaps in*... *comes back out with money*... ah... just right... *eats a crisp dollar bill*...
2008-11-25 [Thunder Cid]: *rolls eyes*


2008-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: *Throws bacony-jellybeans at Thunder God* >:D
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I've tasted a bacon flavored jellybean before... those things are gross.
2008-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: I can honestly say that I, Duke of Dice, have not tasted a bacon flavoured jellybean in my lifetime. Although it should be noted that I have tasted on in your lifetime. *nods*
2008-11-25 [Paul Doyle]: They serve even less edible things at work, in the employee cafeteria :P
2008-11-25 [Duke Devlin]: We don't have an employee cafeteria. :P So you're better off than us. XD Our staffroom is a table and a sink, in the stockroom. XD
2008-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I wish we had a table...
2008-11-26 [Daring Silence]: Bacon in general rocks. *licks table*
I work in Applebee's so I got it all...w00t.
2008-11-26 [Thunder Cid]: Thank god I work for myself.
2008-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I work for myself too... my boss is a douche... he gave me overtime again... *sweeps floor*... *mumbles incoherently*...
2008-11-26 [Duke Devlin]: Hey.. We get half of a table. :P I work for... Polo Ralph Lauren. -___-
Nah it's alright really..
2008-11-26 [JaeMarix]: I work in an office, there are 7 of us employees, the 2 owners + 1 lawyer..
We have a grand total of 30 desks.. & 79 chairs..
Biggest meeting we've ever had here was about 17 people >.< Its like a chair mausoleum!!
2008-11-27 [Duke Devlin]: XD Hahaha so many chairs. OO
2008-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I've seen more... *eats ramen*...
2008-11-27 [Duke Devlin]: Haven't we all?
2008-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I haven't... *eats ramen*...
2008-11-27 [Duke Devlin]: LIES TRICKERY DECEIT WITCHCRAFT LARCENY SLANDER HERESY TREASON\
ETCETERA ;)
2008-11-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's what she said!
2008-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Nok says "hey"... *eats ramen*... *stabs Nok*...
2008-11-29 [Duke Devlin]: Hey Nok. :O
Also.., I know, isn't it, Turkey? ;)
2008-11-30 [Imperator]: You'd think he would've been eaten a few days ago...
2008-11-30 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Meow.
2008-11-30 [twitchboy]: peanut butter jelly time!!!!
2008-11-30 [Duke Devlin]: Heh XD
2008-11-30 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Where ya at? Where ya at?
2008-11-30 [twitchboy]: peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly and a baseball bat
2008-12-01 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Now there ya go! There ya go! Peanut butta jeeelleh! Peanut butta jeeelleh!
2008-12-01 [twitchboy]: lol nice
2008-12-01 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: ^-^
2008-12-01 [Lejeunz_girl]: where's breakfast? I am Huuuuungry!
2008-12-01 [JaeMarix]: does cup o soup constitute as ramens? o.~ or is that blaspheme? ~.~
2008-12-01 [Duke Devlin]: Blasphemous! BLASPHEMER!~!~~~~~~
2008-12-01 [JaeMarix]: :blah: as always, where ever i wander into! me = heretical..
you say tom-a-to, i say toh-my-god the pigeons are coming!!!
2008-12-01 [Duke Devlin]: The pigeons are always coming with you people~~ :P
XD
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *pigeons swoop in and carry twitchboy away*
2008-12-02 [twitchboy]: Yes!! I am the pigeon whisperer!!! Mwuhahah now my conquest of al salvidor. Then the world!!! Coo coo coooo fly my pigeons fly!!! Mwuhahahahaha *Commands pigeons to poop on mort*
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *raises an army of seagulls*... attack! *seagulls, equip with tiny M-16's, swarm the pigeons*... *eats ramen with pigeon poo in it*...
2008-12-02 [twitchboy]: My pigeons are more areodynamic than your slow sea rats! And they have freakin lasers on their heads! *Destroys seagulls*
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: It seems I have no other choice... *unleashes my army of nuclear powered, laser guided, kamikaze condors*...
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *bald eagle snipers, hidden in various locations throughout the diner, fire at the pigeons*
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *a lone parakeet flies over the battle field with the words "Granola Gay" written on it*... *it suddenly drops an A-bomb, H-bomb, and even the F-bomb*...
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*a cat shows up to eat the remaining birds, but the radiation from the bombs mutates it into a giant talking tiger*... *it goes on to star in commercials for Frosted Flakes under the pseudonym "Tony"*...
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: After a few months of being a star, the effects of the radiation began to wear off. One day, surrounded by children on the set of a commercial, "Tony" suddenly reverted back to an animalistic mindset and turned on the kids, thinking they were tuna. None survived... *eats ramen*...
2008-12-02 [twitchboy]: dear god...now that was funny
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: You know... they never did catch Tony... *eats ramen*...
2008-12-02 [Eloura]: *returns to bob's diner brushing off the dust from my corner*
2008-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I thought I removed that corner... *eats ramen*... *Tony bursts in and kidnaps Eloura*...
2008-12-02 [Duke Devlin]: Mort.. I think I love you. OO
XD
Just kidding. ;)
2008-12-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Fine! I don't love you either! *sells our children into slavery*
2008-12-03 [twitchboy]: *buys the kids* Now children we are goin to play hide and seek at neverland ranch...*pulls out leather spandes suite and whip*
2008-12-03 [Mortified Penguin]: I... I can't take this money for the children... it's filthy... *washes the money*... okay... now I can take it. ...have fun, kids!
2008-12-03 [Eloura]: Nope i preserved that corner on a hard drive :P *returns carring a sign that says* Tiger hide for sale!
2008-12-03 [Duke Devlin]: Oops.. Guess I forgot to tell you... =X I'm pregnant! AGAIN! :O *Dramatic music plays* .. What's worse.. IT IS YOURS, MORT! D:
2008-12-04 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: O_O
2008-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts taking bids for the new kid*
2008-12-04 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: That's terrible >:O
2008-12-04 [Eloura]: *giggles* You guys and all are crazy!
2008-12-05 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I like cheese.
2008-12-05 [Eloura]: FOODZ!!!!!!! *eats ramen*
2008-12-06 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: My step dad puts cheese on his ramen.
2008-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare he mess with the ramen formula?! ...that's high treason!
2008-12-06 [Eloura]: RAMEN ROCKS NO MATTER WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!
2008-12-07 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I'm s-sorry! I think it looks rather gross. XD! There is also a type of ramen he eats that you can only get in Korea... and it's super mega hot.
2008-12-07 [Eloura]: O.O
2008-12-07 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Yeah. The packaging is really strange too. But, he's not been to Korea in a long while, so he's not had it in years.
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: KOREA FTW! :D
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: I so haven't been keeping up with this. O.o;
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: Me neither.. XD Last comment I left was about me pregnant with another of Mort's children.. WHich is odd.., I'm always having kids here. XD See the menu.. XD
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: Lmao. XD And in real life you tend to try to make me have kids... Weird the difference between the net and reality. :P XD
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: It is very abstract. ;)
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: Oh yes. But we love Abstract. :P Unless it's abstract art. >.<;
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: Abstract art can go fuck itself!!!! >:(
But abstract in general, is acetasmic. :D
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: XD LMAO! I wonder if that is even possible...
Yesh Xd I got called abstraaaaact.
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: XD For Abtract's sake, I certainly hope not. -.- XD
YOU DID!? *Alice in Wonderland's March Hare voice*
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: XD It could be... interesting...
Yeah, in my reference... Xd Chris called me abstract.
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: Very interesting... oO D:
XD How bizarre! *Still voice* More TEA?!~~
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: Wouldn't want to see it though.
TEA! *Mad hatter voice* I'd love some tea! CLEAN CUPS!
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: No... D: Certainly not! D:
Just a half-cup for me! *pours yurr tea* *Slices cup in half* Sugar!?
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: XD
Sugar?! Yes! Sugar!
Aunty's wooden leg, Aunty's wooden leeeg~ (from the weird Alice thing with Whoopi in it)
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: (I figured) XD
*Pours copious amounts of sugar into your tea~* SUGAR~! Cream!?
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: DEFINITELY! *erratic hand movements*
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: *Jumps up* No time for CREAM! It's time to~~~
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: CHAAAAAANGE PLACES!
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: *Dashes to a new seat* *continues to offer tea around*
(Glad you got that one. >:D XD)
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: (How could I not? XD)
*jumps into a big fluffy pink chair* This watch... is broken.
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: (Not possible. :O ;) XD)
Oh I see what is wrong! *passes jam*
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: (Exactly)
And butter! Pass me the Butter! *shoves jam in the watch*
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: *Passes a stick off butter* What about MUSTARD!?
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: Mustard? No! CUSTARD!
*squishes stick in*
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: AHH! What was I THINKING!? *Passes custard* But would it not be better without all those COGS?!
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: Take them out, Marchy! I can't bear to touch them!
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: *Pries them away with a butterknife* EUGH! *drama sigh* There it's okay now, Hatter! D:
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: *hums a tune* *shoves custard into the watch*
2008-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: Nicely! Nicely! *throwns sugar in for good measure*
2008-12-07 [Chimes]: *watch explodes* o.o There must have been something wrong with the custard... or the sugar....
2008-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*stares at the freaks in here*... I knew I shouldn't have taken the red pill... damn that Morpheus! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Pills in your ramen...
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: I maintain it is the fault of the locale~ *Haughty* Simply.., contemptable. *sneer* And you! Why do you require pills!? Pills are for hippies and the dead!
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: The dead? Dx?
2008-12-08 [Chimes]: Of course! The dead must have their pills!
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: D:?! H-how! INFORM ME OF THIS! DX!
2008-12-08 [Chimes]: You mean... you don't know?
DUKEY! *searches around for [Duke Devlin]*
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: N-no. O_O... I don't.
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: *Appears from the ether* I KNOW~~! *Creepy voice* The pills feed their existence. The pills give life even to their unique form of death... *fades*
2008-12-08 [Chimes]: See, the mysterious Dice holds the answer to everything. :]
2008-12-08 [Imperator]: Yeah, but I bet it's weighted...
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: That I do, and that I am.. I am heavily weighted to land on both six, and one. ;)
Work that one out, genius. :P
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: @_@! I... I... blaaaagghhh. X_X *dies*
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: I thought so.. ;)
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *walks in dressed like rabbit*
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: :O OMFG!
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *chews carrot* AAhhh..whats up doc?"
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: *throws an eggplant*
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: *Throws a bomb*
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I think it was a dud- *blows up and dies again* X_X
2008-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a grenade*
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear.., I appear to have let off an explosive within the walls of Bob's Diner. How.., unfortunate. Nevermind, perhaps now someone will do some cleaning about the place.. *looks pointedly at [Khronos Atmosphaera], the corpse*
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *is in hole in ground* Is it safe to come out now?
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: Quite so, Sir Araglas! Quite so! *fake moustache*
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: x_x; *smoking*
2008-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... wait... hole...? ...in the floor? ...In my diner?! ...MY FLOORBOARDS! *leaps at Araglas*
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *runs out of the bar and then walks back in dressed like a beautiful woman*


My my my...what have we here?
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: x_x
2008-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: *wolf-whistles lecherously* ... *At Inazuma and Mort* ..
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: x_x;
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *walks tot he bar and taps counter* Can I get a drink?
2008-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I will never serve you a drink! Seppuke! *stabs self and collapses*
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *raises eye brow and leaves diner* *comes back in dressed as rabbit*


did anyone see my cousin? She was just in here...had on a red sparkly dress..loads of blond hair and red lipstick?
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I saw her and I'm dead.
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *eats a carrot* I see...oh well I'll find her later..*starts digging a hole*
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Oh, is that my grave?
2008-12-08 [Araglas]: *pokes head out of hole* I don't think so..Im making my summer vacation home...six rooms, and a basement...
2008-12-08 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: But it's winter.
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: Uh-huh...and a summer home underground is perfect!! It'll stay warm! *goes back to digging*
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Oooh, gotcha!
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: *still digging* And since its here in the diner I won't have to worry about food!
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I hang out in here, but I don't think I'd wanna eat anything from here...
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: *pokes head from hole* Really? But the Zombie Burgers are amazing!!
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: O_O... I am a Zombie.
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: Really?


*hops out of hole and looks at you* Then that would be a form of cannabilism for you, and needless to say...I do need a fresh supply of zombie parts..but..your not the right type of Zombie....
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I know. I don't wanna eat my own kind. I wouldn't be this way, if it wasn't for the recent bomb...
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: bomb...did you say bomb?


As in a new fresh supply of Zombies?
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I threw and eggplant, [Duke Devlin] threw a bomb, and Mort threw a grenade.
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: hmm....any clue where they landed?


*is now dressed like mercanary complete with scary and shiny swords*
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I- O_O... >=( ... How do you change so fast, and in front of me without me noticing!? And I have no idea where anything landed! I just know I'm missing an arm!
2008-12-09 [Araglas]: *blinks and shrugs* I changed right here! How could you miss it?


An arm...this one? *holds up arm clutching a designer jack skelington purse*
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I dunno.. maybe I'm blind.


Uhm... n-no. I don't have a purse like that. Mine actually has... >.> *looks around* <.< Inuyasha and Sesshomaru on it. Don't kill me even more please.
2008-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Inuyasha sucks! ...*kills Nokaredes for no apparent reason*...
2008-12-09 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: I knew someone would say that. u.u
2008-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SAsHknWPwts
2008-12-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: PENNY BOY!! -tackles pen- miss me much?
2008-12-10 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Pshh... I already have that game. The only thing I don't like is butt sex with the fairies.
2008-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...stinking wolfy... *throws a slinky at you*...
2008-12-10 [White Wolf guardian of snow and ice]: -plays with slinky- I'm not stinky, I took a bath two days ago! -grin-
2008-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4elLuTGg3Yw&feature=related
2008-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: !!
2008-12-10 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: xD! I love that one!
2008-12-10 [Duke Devlin]: Wtf.. XD *commits GTA*
2008-12-11 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: What car didja get?
2008-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: ..... .... A BACON-MOBILE!
2008-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *Wiener Mobile is offended*
2008-12-11 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: O_O... Never mind. I'm not riding in that smelly thing.
2008-12-13 [Araglas]: *jumps back into rabbit hole*
2008-12-14 [Paul Doyle]: Dumbed-down history lesson, for today's generation.
  

2008-12-14 [twitchboy]: holy f@#$ that was funny
2008-12-14 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: Whoa... I love history... but that was definitely a new way of teaching it. My history teacher sang song to us though, so... it wasn't all that boring! lol
2008-12-14 [twitchboy]: they could have made the nukes funnier
tru_man- check out my 733+ weapun i gots
*boom* mushroom cloud
TOJO- WTF WUZZAT!?!?!
Tru_man-mutherfocking a bomb. Boya biotch. Yeah that just happened
2008-12-17 [Tigger1217]: Hi
2008-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yo!! ...*eats ramen*...
2008-12-24 [nokaredes]: ...oh hay. I haven't been here in a while. What's been going on? *is too lazy to read nearly 3 months worth of comments*
2008-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Lazy Mexican!! ...wait...... *eats ramen*...
2008-12-24 [nokaredes]: ...I... had a reminder message where I wrote myself happy birthday. Only, it sounds like Turkey or Mortimer may have written it. It told me to come here. *is confused*
2008-12-24 [Duke Devlin]: Holy shit we've all been pretty damn lazy. Mort, aren't you angry at us? :P
XD
2008-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... yes I am! *hires people to kill you all*
2008-12-25 [twitchboy]: im imortal...sorry no death here
2008-12-25 [nokaredes]: I demand somebody from B's D wish me happy birthday!
2008-12-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Happy birthday! ...I bet people always give you only one present and say it's for both Christmas and your birthday... sucker. My birthday is just far enough away from Christmas so they can't try that with me. January 8th, sucka'.
2008-12-25 [nokaredes]: People sometimes did that when I was younger, but now pretty much the only person who does that is Chickyboo... not even my aunts do that anymore!
2008-12-25 [Duke Devlin]: February 5th, Bitches. XD Awhh NICE. :D You're lucky then, Nok! :)
2008-12-26 [nokaredes]: Yep :D
2008-12-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Yo, various peoples... whadidja get fo' Christmas?
2008-12-27 [twitchboy]: a mother freakin Honda Yay me!...other than that...well that was about my only present lol
2008-12-27 [Imperator]: A giant Millennium Falcon!
2008-12-27 [twitchboy]: give me a lift some time han
2008-12-27 [nokaredes]: I got a digital camera, a comic book, and new pj's :3
2008-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I've seen that giant Millennium Falcon... darn you! Give it to me! ...and you, Nok... what comic book?
2008-12-28 [nokaredes]: I Am Legend. I also got a huuuuuge bag of candy today, late...
2008-12-28 [nokaredes]: And I bought a new laptop and a DS before I left South Carolina! :3
2008-12-28 [Duke Devlin]: A Wacom Bambpp Fun. ^^ :D ... It's fun. :P
Also about a bazillion books and stuff. XD
2008-12-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Darnit, someone start typing again! ...sheesh...*eats ramen*...
2008-12-31 [nokaredes]: Who's seen Dr. Horrible's Sing-Along Blog...?
2009-01-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
2009-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty! It's been so long! ...and the Tooth fairy told me to tell you... *shivs you with a sharpened toothbrush*... Brush yo teeth!
2009-01-01 [Eloura]: HAPPY NEW YEAR!
2009-01-01 [nokaredes]: Happy New Year...
2009-01-01 [HardRockAngel]: Happy newyear ^^
2009-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: You people are very repetitive... *eats ramen*...
2009-01-01 [nokaredes]: ...well... I'm going to drop off the face of the internet sometime tonight/tomorrow... you kids had better not snort anything while I am gone!
2009-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!! *snorts pepper*
2009-01-02 [nokaredes]: Pepper's so lame ...it doesn't even makes you sneeze!
2009-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: If you snort a whole pile of it you might! ...*snorts ramen*...
2009-01-02 [nokaredes]: Mmm... ramen... I should buy some before I get on the train!
2009-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! You don't already carry some with you at all times?!
2009-01-05 [Duke Devlin]: We're not all completely mad, Mort. :P
Well.., perhaps we are.... Since we are here after all. ;)
"You don't have to be mad to live here.., but it helps.." ;)
2009-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... we need new members... or more Duke Devlins... Non-Devlin! Go clone yourself! ...I'll go find the new members... *eats ramen with his hands*...
2009-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *catches nymphosema*... *coughgropesneeze*... *eats ramen*...
2009-01-06 [twitchboy]: heyo....im here...just nothing interesting going on.
2009-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *kidnaps Gandhi*
2009-01-06 [Duke Devlin]: *Promptly clones self* ... *multiple times, obviously*
Devlin: Yo
Duke: Yo
Ryuuji: Yo
Otogi: Yo
Dice: Yo
DiceyPirate: Yo




*Clones spontaneously combust*.... Whoops. >:D
2009-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: You call those clones?! ...none of them had the same number of hairs on their head! ...I checked! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-01-06 [Duke Devlin]: Damnit.. FOILED. D:
*'CLONES' run away*
2009-01-06 [Chimes]: I thought they spontaneously combusted? :P
2009-01-06 [Duke Devlin]: They didn't, they pretended to. :(
2009-01-06 [Chimes]: TRICKERY!
2009-01-06 [Duke Devlin]: And Treason, obviously.
2009-01-07 [twitchboy]: who needs a clone when you can COSPLAY! *dresses like duke* yo
2009-01-07 [Duke Devlin]: DAYUM! :O :D Now, do you mean DUKE, duke, or ME, Duke? XD
2009-01-08 [twitchboy]: jo
2009-01-08 [Duke Devlin]: Whutt tehhh fuhhhk? :O
2009-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6mhbxlz_wrI&feature=related
2009-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JSM9Lj-M3mg&feature=related
2009-01-09 [twitchboy]: u silly
2009-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: No, Mr. Gun! Killing is wrong! ...these are my friends! ...what's that you say, Mr. Gun? Well, of course I like candy! ...how much?! ...well... maybe one... but that's it! ...*takes [twitchboy] into a back room with Mr. Gun*...
2009-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wU2t1cu7io&feature=related
2009-01-10 [twitchboy]: Hiya mr. gun, did you now that regular colonoscopy is good for your health?
2009-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: "Of course. I frequently get my barrel cleaned!"
2009-01-10 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: o___o
2009-01-10 [twitchboy]: use protective gloves =)
2009-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Now you tell me!
2009-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gfv3aKg58E0
2009-01-11 [Duke Devlin]: XD I love you all. :P
2009-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: And I love Santa! ...*eats ramen*... you people! Go read some Cromartie High School!
2009-01-12 [*save my soul*]: this has just cheered me up when i needed it,


thank you!!!!!


your ace this is ace :D:D
2009-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: No one loves Santa! He isn't real. D: And who isn't, Save my Soul? XP
2009-01-12 [*save my soul*]: im just saying i got sent a link really early this morning when i couldnt sleep and was feeling down. this cheered me up enormously :D
2009-01-13 [Duke Devlin]: Awhh :) Well, glad to hear it. :P Try reading the comments.. from the BEGINNING. XD I tried once.. Good luck. ;)
2009-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I've not only read them, but I've also copied them and saved them... just in case. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-01-14 [Duke Devlin]: Haha XD Why is that not surprising. :P
2009-01-14 [Pillowthief]: Too many comments...
Too hungover...
C://Execute. . . . . . . . . .
Syntax Error: Memory Full
Deleting FAT
Deleting BIOS
Syntax Error: Bad OS
Shutting Down. . . . . . .
2009-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *downloads a virus into Pillowthief*
2009-01-15 [Pillowthief]: Syntax Error!
OS Doesn't Exist.
2009-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *replaces Pillowthief's OS with a shiny, new, expensive one*... *infects it with a virus*...
2009-01-15 [Pillowthief]: Agh!
2009-01-16 [twitchboy]: *finds the mythical internet plug to the entire web and pulls* .....blip...*everything goes black and there is someone laughing*
2009-01-16 [Duke Devlin]: Damn.. Now if only you weren't an idiot, and that actually existed. :P
2009-01-16 [twitchboy]: why u call me idiot?
2009-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... there is no such plug... *hides mythical plug behind his back*
2009-01-17 [zankou]: woo! i love toast!
2009-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Toast is for commies!! ......*eats toast*...
2009-01-18 [HardRockAngel]: What happened to the ramen? o.O
2009-01-20 [Paul Doyle]: I blame the French. *shakes fist*
2009-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah? Well I blame the French and the Canadians! ...sucka'... *eats ramen*...
2009-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I hope you all had a good Robert E. Lee day...
2009-01-20 [HardRockAngel]: Obama is going to be inaugurated! *does happy-dance*
2009-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: He's having fried chicken to eat... *eats ramen*... Fried chicken!!
2009-01-20 [HardRockAngel]: Nah, sushi is better =P
Sushi!!
*eats sushi*
2009-01-20 [Alexi Ice]: Im here...now what are you going to do?
2009-01-20 [Chimes]: You just talk about crap and insult each other... basically. XD That's what this place is.
2009-01-20 [Alexi Ice]: HAHAHA. Sounds like a hella good time.
2009-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... I'm gonna slap the ugly off your face, Mitsuki! ...and that's gonna take a lot of slapping...
2009-01-21 [Chimes]: This Diner needs a better class of insult, and I'm not going to give it to them(it). :P
2009-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: You, madame, never open your mouth without subtracting from the sum of human knowledge. *chortles wittily into a glass of full bodied Chteau Latour Pauillac*
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah Morts insults are 'Le boring'.


A Te Siete Un Persona Che Mancare Intelligenza


Take that, bitch. I can insult you in a whole differnt language!
2009-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Chinga tu, puta... *come ramen*...
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: Tramp am I? The more classy definition would probably be bitch, am I right?
2009-01-21 [Thunder Cid]: Mexican Smackdown!
2009-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts on a Mexican wrestler's mask*... *suddenly bashes Cid with a chair, while screaming incomprehensibly*...
2009-01-21 [HardRockAngel]: *quietly backs away and observes the fight*
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]:
Lilith is a prophet
From the prophet came the king
From the king came the pauper
From the pauper came the swing
From the swing came creation
From creation came love,
You don't know what this love is all about,
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: Uh...mine was Italian, thank you.


[sunabozu]...um...WTF? Why are you posting that like, everywhere on elftown?
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: I NEDDD xse!
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: Okie dokie then....*Still WTFing...*
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: i need esx! zOMEIONE! HELP ME!!!!! THE HOROMONES ARE GETTING TO MEEEE!!
2009-01-21 [HardRockAngel]: Wasn't there a Bob's Brothel once? *is thinking*
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: Lol that would be hilarious!
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: yeah but the probel would be getting girls to be ....the girls of the brothel and then getiing them to do things *blushes*
2009-01-21 [HardRockAngel]: Here's a better tip= get a girlfriend? xD
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: i have one and it sucks
2009-01-21 [Chimes]: ... Wow. You're ... I have no words. XD
2009-01-21 [HardRockAngel]: That's cold... Better tip: never reproduce? =P
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: trust me i have lost all interest
2009-01-21 [Chimes]: Then how about you fix that by... say... not having a girlfriend?
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: ! Better ! Get castrated?! That curves the desire completly.
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: no what if i want if the desire comes back
2009-01-21 [Chimes]: You can use your imagination.
2009-01-21 [sunabozu]: i have a very wild imagination and odd too
2009-01-21 [Alexi Ice]: ...its impossible, you know. Once you loose the parts you loose the need.
2009-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Bob's Brothel! ...and only one thing can fix this problem... lots and lots of prostitutes.
2009-01-22 [sunabozu]: no girls will go for it
2009-01-22 [HardRockAngel]: Well, gay men have needs too, right?


*pushes you direction Bob's Brothel*
2009-01-22 [sunabozu]: im not gay*vomits*
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: *Helps push him away*


Good one, Angel.
2009-01-22 [sunabozu]: imma axe you somthin, do you guys like me?
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: Does my opinion matter. But no, I don't.
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: First of all, your grammar is atrocious.
2009-01-22 [sunabozu]: i know i do that to piss people off sometimes
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: Well at least capitolize the 'I'.
2009-01-22 [Chimes]: You know you do what? You know you have terrible grammar? Well, I'd suggest fixing it. :P


*Capitalize (Or Capitalise, depending on which you prefer)
2009-01-22 [sunabozu]: I'm Sorry, I'm not white
2009-01-22 [Chimes]: What does that have to do with anything? O.o;
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: Lol yeah...my bad. ^^ Thanks Chimes!


2009-01-22 [Chimes]: Welcome ^^
Sunabozu, my question still stands.
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah really. Just because you are not white has nothing to do with Grammar skills. You aparently speak fine if you try.
2009-01-22 [sunabozu]: well english wasnt my first language
2009-01-22 [Alexi Ice]: There we go. That's better. See, that actually makes sense. ^^ What was it, in that case? You can add to the other language insults Mort and I were passing around.
2009-01-23 [Pillowthief]: I missed something... Yet the desire to not care is far too great.
Wait, here comes something...


You guys all suck.




(Hey [Paul Doyle]- Nice to see you back)
2009-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *harpoons Pillowthief*... *knows that sunabozu is lying*... *is all knowing!*... *knows that Chimes was involved in that hit and run*...
2009-01-23 [Alexi Ice]: Your mom sucks.


LOL! *Feels like a kindergardener* What was I involved in, Mort? !
2009-01-23 [twitchboy]: *knows that mort runs an underground duck smuggling rink**knows mitsuki once made love to a cutout poster of bobo-bobobo* *knows duke plays dungeon dice monsters in the basement.*
2009-01-23 [Alexi Ice]: oh my god! Totally!


*Knows that Twitch is so far in the closet he is finding Christmas presents* *Knows Mort secretly wants to have brothel sex with Sunbozu, who is not human but some kind of alien* and that *Chimes secretly hates grammar usage and lives with her dead cousin.*


! Woot.
2009-01-23 [twitchboy]: hey look i found my pokemon cards! *keeps digging*......holy shit its narnia!
2009-01-23 [Alexi Ice]: ! Holy crap! Stupid goat man! Whats his name...whatever ! Goat bastard.
2009-01-23 [twitchboy]: wait! i found michael jackson's straight side! and morts!...and look elvis is here to!
2009-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots the goat man with a sniper rifle*... okay you guys... I think we're safe for anoth- *gets taken out by another goat man*
2009-01-23 [twitchboy]: omg ITS AN INVASION OF FAUNS!!! Elvis sing them into submission!
2009-01-23 [Chimes]: XD
2009-01-23 [HardRockAngel]: Why do that?
It enrages them even more o_O
2009-01-23 [twitchboy]: who u?
2009-01-23 [HardRockAngel]: No, Elvis and his singing.
2009-01-24 [twitchboy]: no who is u
2009-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We wouldn't be having this goat/Elvis problem if those damn Mongolians would stop breaking down my wall! ...*eats sweet and sour pork*...
2009-01-24 [Eloura]: *reapears carring the ramen orders*
2009-01-24 [HardRockAngel]: @ Twithboy: I am Hardrockangel, used to be very active on here, until my parents blocked the site.
They recently unblocked it, hence I am online agin and active here... again. =P


I am known for my kicking abilities when being sniped. ask [Thunder Cid], he knows. =P
2009-01-24 [Eloura]: I remeber the Hardrockangel O.O *rubs head* Never knew
2009-01-24 [Alexi Ice]: ! *Grabs an order of sour beef ramen (* my own personal favorite*) *and scarfs it* Creepy ass goat people...ugh.
2009-01-25 [twitchboy]: *slurping shrimp ramen* ish cool man
2009-01-25 [Thunder Cid]: *snipes angel*
2009-01-25 [Chimes]: Uh oh... This will not end well. XD
2009-01-26 [HardRockAngel]: *quickly tries to evade, followed by a swift kick-attack*
2009-01-26 [Thunder Cid]: *rolls and throw a rock*
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *swiftly throws a frag grenade*
2009-01-26 [*save my soul*]: *grenade lands at feet*
what the fu...*BOOM!*
2009-01-26 [sunabozu]: to answer you question from the other day, my first language was blackfoot
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws rabid chipmunk at the charred remains*
2009-01-26 [*save my soul*]: *sounds echo from a disembodyed mouth on the celing*


great do you know how humiliating it is to re-assemble yourself from chipmunk droppings?......again
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *pays no attention to the incorporeal set of lips*...*throws a molesting clown*
2009-01-26 [*save my soul*]: ahhhh!!!!! no!!!!!!!!


not again!!!!


hey...hey...clown put that away!!!


i said put that back in your pants!!!!


NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *chucks a ridiculousy large toy hammer at clown*...*the clown catches the hammer and so returns to his molesting ways*
2009-01-26 [*save my soul*]: *cries of humilaiton echo through the room as the clown grabs the diembodyed mouth and runs towards bobs brothel next door*
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the clown accidentally sets off the sectret land mines beneath the brothel*... deus ex machina is the best literary technique ever created...
2009-01-26 [*save my soul*]: *disembodyed mouth flys through the air*


thank you


*lands on some dog dirt*


yuck!! why does this happen to me?? check please!
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2009-01-26 [sunabozu]: in the myonin
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...do a barrel roll!! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-01-26 [sunabozu]: *tilts head* i feel fat
2009-01-26 [Ukia]: *wanders in* The janitor is amusing. I like someone who likes cats. Not sure what to think of the armor. *ponders*
2009-01-26 [HardRockAngel]: *got a rock thrown at her by Cid*
HEY!
*throws it back with all her might*
*crosses fingers that the rock hits him really hard*
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets hit by a rock*... Who threw that?!! ...*smacks Ukia*...
2009-01-26 [HardRockAngel]: *shuffles away, whistling innocently*
2009-01-26 [Ukia]: *sits on a convenient penguin cushion*
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: No! That's my brother who I've neglected to mention until just now! ...Steve, NOOO!!
2009-01-26 [Ukia]: *looks down* *snarf* *sit on Mortified Penguin* *ponders new scuff on scales*
2009-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *detonates himself*... goodbye cool world! Wait I mean crue- *explodes*
2009-01-26 [Ukia]: *sniff sniff* Burnt fowl? *sniff* *looks down* I thought I was over the flaming fart phase that came with the diet? . . . *ponders*
2009-01-27 [Alexi Ice]: Blinks* WTF...?
2009-01-27 [Ukia]: *notices Mitsukis The Wolf Girl* I'm a large purple dragon. What, you expect normalcy? It exists on Elftown?
2009-01-27 [Alexi Ice]: Huh, no I was just lost myself! LOL!!
*Throws ramen*
2009-01-27 [Ukia]: *snarf* Tasty. 
2009-01-27 [Alexi Ice]: ZOMG IT's the thundercats! (Does anyone remember that show from anything but Robot Chicken clips?) Well I do! They had a cat named Snarf. HAHAHAHa
2009-01-27 [Ukia]: I remember Snarf, too. He was a cute little kitty-dragon creature. I also remember wondering what would happen if Snarf and Garfield ever met.
2009-01-27 [Alexi Ice]: They would eat eachother.
2009-01-27 [Ukia]: *ponders* I think they would be astonished to find such an odd-looking-yet-strangely-familiar creature in front of them. When you think about it, to do look kind of alike. 
2009-01-27 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah Kinda. Snarf is fuzzier but probably stupider. Lol. He was my least favorite character! I liked the twins!
2009-01-27 [Ukia]: Lol. Aside from Snarf, I don't remember too many of the other characters very well. *Grumbles about irritating memory* It's been a while since I last saw The Thundercats. It seems, for me anyway, that the least complicated character stays in my mind longer. Or I'm just strange.
2009-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of cats... *eats Chinese food*... *starts building a great wall around Bob's Diner to keep out those freakin' Mongolians (From Mongo's Bar and Grill)*...
2009-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: This year B's D is averaging about 12 comments a day... as opposed to the last four years: 15, 8, 10, and the first year of business had about 26. Clearly, this isn't the worst year, but it isn't quite the best. Now, this is all obviously Obama's fault... We must get the average comment number up, so that we can beat last year's friscal report! ...*goes back to building the Great Wall of Bob's Diner*...
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: r u hiyering
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: We sure are... *eats ramen*... I believe the position of Toilet Brush Brusher is open...
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: o wen can i start
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Two days before the day after tomorrow...
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: o ok ill get 2 werk then
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws flaming toilet brushes at you*... *continues building the wall*...
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: catchis it n gos 2 the bathroom
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf*
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mongolians approach the wall*... *throws Mitsuki at them*...
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: what u eat ukia??
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *lights Ukia on fire and hurls her at the Mongolians as well*... Don't worry! I might avenge you!
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: lol hahahahaha
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *shakes off* *sits on Mortified Penguin* This is nice granite you have.
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *pokes mortified penguin* u still alive?
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: starts scrubin the toylit GOD WHAT R THESE PEOPLE EATING
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *is granite*... *says nothing of value*...
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *Chomps on girl scout cookies*
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Girl scout cookies...? ...OH NOOO!! ...My son! ...*holds up some cookie crumbs*... what have you done?!!
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: O.O *gets off Penguin* *eats Mongolians* I'd forgotten how tasty these folk can be. *snarfsnarfsnarf*
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: Sorrey boss keeps scrubing
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: ooops *starts to eat MNMs*
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: Oh my . . . *ponders* 
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: gos 2 the next toylit and scrubs
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *uses recently cleaned toilet for intended purpose* 
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: y timmy cleaning toylit
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: what u wont me 2 do wen im don with the toylits
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: clean my cave it dirty and have cobwebs
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *steps in as Wind Queen* That's your job, not his. He works here. Didn't you see Mortified Penguin hire him?
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: he asked what to do next so me answered
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: That's Penguin's job, not yours. *eats Mongolians*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: waaa ukia yelled at me waaaaaaaa
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: well if thers nuthin els after the toylits i gess i can still do it uless theres sumthing els
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: eat candy *hands timmy MNMs and cookies*
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: eets the cookey thanks
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *pouts* The Mongolians run away . . . Oh well. *snarfs dead horses*
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: starts 2 eat the mnms y dus this plase seem so fermilyer
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *poofs in ends godys.* Now we have more
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: more what
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: candy and goodys
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *snarfs goodies* 
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: no these not for you they for timmy bad Ukia
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: ok givs it back
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: CrystalBlaze, why'd you nearly cough your lungs out? It's not on the menu today . . .
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: me drink tea me choke it funny now
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: Ohhhh . . . . *ponders*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *Runs towards a wall* look *wham* that be fun
2009-01-28 [timmyT]: tarts twiching
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: that be fun. *backs up to do it again*
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *whack*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: owwww *Runs at wall* WEEEEEEEEEE *wham*
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *dumps garbage on the toilets*... clean them again! ...And I'm docking your pay! ...and no Christmas bonuses! ...*eats ramen*... *returns to building the wall*...
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *runs at the wall* me hungy *WHAM* *get up and does it again*
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *eats granite block intended for wall*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *Runs at wall* me hungy *Wham* *get up and does it again*
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: CrystalBlaze! Don't do that! It's not good for your health! ...*cuts off your legs*... much better... *tries to continue building the wall*... I could have sworn I put that granite block around here somewhere...
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: You know, CrystalBlaze is also a dragon, she just looks like she's made from crystal. *eats another granite block* Nice granite you have here. 
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: hey no fair. Ukia ate it
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: Be quiet and poof your legs back on. 
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *uses blocks of salt to build the wall instead*... *Mongolian deer try to eat the wall*...
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *eats Mongolian deer* Tasty. But not as tasty as the Mongolians themselves. 
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: fine *poof* *stands up and runs towards wall*
2009-01-28 [Paul Doyle]: *sends forth the mongoloid deer---eyes crossed, heads tilted, drooling tongues sticking out*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *WHAM Hits the wall once again* me no no y me do this me just do it
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *blinks* You'd think the deer would have more sense than the humans . . . *snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf snarf*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *Hits the wall* eat a deer *runs towards wall*
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: bi al peples
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes back to the wall, using cement this time*
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: *wanders off to find less-tasty granite for wall* 
2009-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Dear God... my calculations were off... we're actually averaging only about 10 comments a day this year!! ...it must be the Mongolians' faults! ...*builds wall faster with ramen*... *eats cement*...
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: *stops running at wall* is that good is that bad me confused and me head hurts
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: I don't know. . . . *tries cement* Strange . . . it tastes a lot like the Mongolian humans . . . *stacks granite blocks* 
2009-01-28 [CrystalBlaze]: is there going to be a hunt or not???
2009-01-28 [Ukia]: On this wiki???? Are you nuts? This is a diner; people (meaning humanoids) come here to eat. That would be very rude of us! Also, we'd get blood on everything and make the employees work more difficult. 
2009-01-29 [CrystalBlaze]: u no wat me mean
2009-01-29 [Ukia]: Me do, me do. *nods sagely* Don't care, either. 
2009-01-29 [CrystalBlaze]: ah com on
2009-01-29 [Ukia]: *poke*
2009-01-29 [CrystalBlaze]: *pokes back harder*
2009-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *pokes Ukia... with a knife*... *finally finishes that wall!*... *Mongolian hordes are kept at bay*...
2009-01-29 [CrystalBlaze]: good ridens
2009-01-29 [Ukia]: *ponders new scratch on scales* Gonna leave soon . . . head hurts and computer acting up. 
2009-01-29 [CrystalBlaze]: k
2009-01-29 [timmyT]: sorey i 8nt show up yesteday couldt get on
2009-01-30 !!:   
2009-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: That thing only works in IE... *eats ramen*...
2009-01-30 [hammersmashface]: lol wats this wikki for?
2009-01-30 [Paul Doyle]: It's for fostering a quasi-sexual love for ramen, evidently . . . among other things.
2009-01-30 [hammersmashface]: lol oh gosh i ate nothing but ramen for like 3 years stright...i wish they make more flavors...
2009-01-30 [sunabozu]: hey whats up haters
2009-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2009-01-30 [HardRockAngel]: ...*eats sushi*
2009-01-31 [Pillowthief]: ...*Kills the next commenter. Eats their insides*
2009-01-31 [Chimes]: *has no insides anyway* :P
2009-01-31 [Pillowthief]: *Pretends to eat [Chimes]'s insides*


Hey, did anyone catch that? I just saw [~Crimson Angel~] under the "Interesting People" tab. Who's running this place?!?


*Almost eats [~Crimson Angel~]'s insides, but thinks better of it. Pays someone to hit her with a car instead*
2009-01-31 [Chimes]: Well... you could eat my insides... if you could find the jars I keep them in... but I lose track...
2009-01-31 [Pillowthief]: I'd rather them be fresh. And the whole "already took them out and Im still alive thing" just isn't doing it for me either. I prefer my meals to be already dead.
2009-01-31 [Alexi Ice]: Your mom isn't doing it for you >>
2009-01-31 [Chimes]: I may as well be the walking dead... I am so tired.
2009-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: French people taste like chicken! ...filthy, sweaty, chicken... *eats ramen*...
2009-01-31 [whitehot]: i havent been on in like 2 days hmmmm.... *steals morts ramen* *shoos him* hi mort!
2009-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*slowly activates the dormant bomb within the confines of the ramen*...
2009-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Who wants to try something fun?!


1. Open Notepad
2. Type "start" ten times
3. Type "hax.bat" at the end
4. Save the document as "hax.bat"
5. Open it!


...*eats ramen*...
2009-02-02 [hammersmashface]: wat dose it do?
2009-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: N-nothing... *eats ramen*...
2009-02-02 [Alexi Ice]: I bet it's some kind of hacker thing or something! DON'T DO IT! IT'S A TRAP!
2009-02-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: It shouldn't do anything except continually open itself...
2009-02-02 [Weregon]: -sits at the corner table and works on his alchemy-
2009-02-02 [HardRockAngel]: *tries to mix two chemicals*
*chemicals go BOOM!*
2009-02-02 [hammersmashface]: wat it opens itslef ten times? lol...you guys know the button combanation to copy a word and past it multiple times?
2009-02-02 [timmyT]: runs in sorey
2009-02-02 [Khronos Atmosphaera]: It will open itself ten times... and then those ten will open ten times... and thus multiply and keep going ... you're writing a script... its job is to "start" hax.bat, which is itself.


That's a pretty funny trick though.
2009-02-02 [hammersmashface]: oh. lol so it will go on and on forever huh lol taht is funny...are ther any more liek this?
2009-02-02 [timmyT]: halls ass in the pathroom n starts scrubin toylits
2009-02-02 [sunabozu]: there is no point in life, there is no point in haveing freedom, there is no point in trying to be happy, there is no point in having hope
2009-02-02 [HardRockAngel]: Ah well, shit happens.


.. *Munches sushi* ..
2009-02-02 [timmyT]: whats rong
2009-02-02 [HardRockAngel]: *points at [sunabozu] with a chopstick*
Ask him.


... *gets back to eating sushi* ...
2009-02-02 [sunabozu]: whats the point in life when you cant live?
2009-02-02 [timmyT]: o ok hold on
2009-02-02 [hammersmashface]: have you tryed eating ramen?
2009-02-02 [sunabozu]: i dont eat my pain away, i used to be obease
2009-02-02 [timmyT]: makes sens try weed
2009-02-02 [hammersmashface]: yup!...every thing seems happy'er wen your seeing the world thru your "third eye"
2009-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *has eight eyes*... *is a spider*... *spins webs to catch Mongolian invaders*...
2009-02-02 [timmyT]: trust me if ur doin it now stop
2009-02-02 [hammersmashface]: lol @ mongolians...they are so easaly cought
2009-02-02 [Alexi Ice]: Meow. Meth is the shit that makes fat go away >> *Eats beef ramen and steals some sushi from Angel* Yum.
2009-02-03 [HardRockAngel]: *swiftly prepares some more*
*forgot to mention the sushi Mitsuki stole was laced with extra strong wasabi*
... *Munches sushi* ...
2009-02-03 [Weregon]: Hi Angel.-works on his tetra-grams-
2009-02-03 [Alexi Ice]: *Does not know what Wasabi tastes like, so eats it anyway*
2009-02-03 [HardRockAngel]: Wasabi is the really spicy green stuff that you get with your sushi.
Even a little bit can make you breathe fire like a dragon =P
2009-02-03 [Alexi Ice]: Oh! I have never had it before, I prefer sour stuff myself but..eh *shrugs*
2009-02-03 [Weregon]: Hi mitsuki, angel.
2009-02-03 [timmyT]: scrubs toylit quikley to make up 4 lost time
2009-02-03 [Alexi Ice]: Yo!
2009-02-03 [Weregon]: -sits next to Mitsuki-
2009-02-04 [timmyT]: scrubs faster
2009-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in*... *dumps mud on the toilets*... Look how terrible these look! I should feed you to the lions! ...*the lions look up from their newspapers*...
2009-02-04 [hammersmashface]: lol
2009-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *glances around inconspicuously*... *morphs into the red ranger and jumps out the window*...
2009-02-04 [hammersmashface]: DU~DU DU~DU DUu DUu DUH~DUU
2009-02-04 [Eloura]: *reappears carring deaths sythe*
2009-02-04 [Weregon]: Hi.
2009-02-04 [Alexi Ice]: *Eats more lemon ramen and hot wasabi sushi and greets Weregon* This place is a mad house.
2009-02-04 [Weregon]: I'm wolf, and what is your name?


2009-02-04 [Chimes]: Definitely a mad house.
2009-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: My name is... Parangaricutirimicuaro!! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-02-04 [Eloura]: Hey Paran wheres bob *eats chicken ramen*
2009-02-04 [Alexi Ice]: My name is Mitsu!
2009-02-04 [Eloura]: Mine's El
2009-02-04 [Weregon]: Nice to meet you Mitsu.
2009-02-05 [Alexi Ice]: I belive we have previously been introduced but, nice to meet you as well.
2009-02-05 [Eloura]: Hello all!
2009-02-05 [twitchboy]: penis gag! ollo
2009-02-05 [Weregon]: -sits next to Mitsu and eats some of her Ramon-
2009-02-05 [Alexi Ice]: Hello El and Twitch... I thought you were still in the closet looking for presents?
2009-02-05 [Eloura]: *grins and waves* Helo Mitsu! Hey twitch!
2009-02-05 [Weregon]: Hi Mitsu.
2009-02-05 [Alexi Ice]: Hello everyone.. ^^
2009-02-05 [Chimes]: Bob's Diner... now home to only greetings.
2009-02-05 [Alexi Ice]:   
2009-02-05 [Weregon]: Hi mitsu -hugs her-
2009-02-05 [Chimes]: So many greetings... all on one page... *dies*
2009-02-05 [Alexi Ice]: *Hug*
2009-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Clean your teeth with a chainsaw!
2009-02-05 [Weregon]: How are you Mitsu?
2009-02-06 [twitchboy]: epic fail!!! just like michael jordan's baseball carrer
2009-02-06 [hammersmashface]: hey i think he managed to hit the ball once or twice :P
2009-02-06 [Eloura]: *reappears carring ramen*
2009-02-06 [Alexi Ice]: ZOMG! The chainsaw idea sounds like SOOOOOOOOO much fun! Although my woodchipper is more enter taining >> Though they wouldn't get your teeth very clean.
2009-02-06 [Weregon]: hi mitsu


2009-02-06 [Chimes]: Haha. Should so do it. XD
2009-02-06 [Alexi Ice]: Meow.
2009-02-07 [timmyT]: dam srubs toylit
2009-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen out of the toilet*... hmm... decent job! ...now go clean the other 79,003,257 toilets! That's right... we have a lot of bathrooms here... *eats more toilet ramen*...
2009-02-07 @Not logged in user@: how big is this romm gos 2 cleen the next 1
2009-02-07 [Duke Devlin]: MAKE WAY FOR THE MONKEY INVASION!
2009-02-07 [HardRockAngel]: *makes way*
CHICKEN INVASION AT THE SaME TIME!
2009-02-09 [Duke Devlin]: No! *slaps you in the forehead to stop bad behaviour* Don't make me get the spray-bottle! >:O
2009-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YBsBjKdAD18
2009-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: A crappy video... with me in it!
2009-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Who wants to guess which one is me...? ...*eats ramen*... come on... guess!!! ...*throws a knife at hardrockangel*...
2009-02-10 [hammersmashface]: hmmm i dono...i didnt see anyone eating ramen
2009-02-10 [Duke Devlin]: I'll watch it later.... :P
2009-02-10 [Weregon]: Hi Everyone.
2009-02-10 [HardRockAngel]: *dodges it*
*bitch-slaps Penguin for throwing the knife*
2009-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOO!! Penguin! ...*holds up the small, flightless bird that was just violated*... *shrugs*... *deep fries it*...
2009-02-11 [Alexi Ice]: !
2009-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ?!
2009-02-11 [Alexi Ice]: LOL. IDK what that was about. Mitsu is bored.
2009-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said! ...and then I killed her for being insolent. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *glances around*... *drags a large trash bag and tosses it in the dumpster*...
2009-02-11 [Weregon]: -sits next to Mitsu-
2009-02-11 [Alexi Ice]: May I just say that this place is like...painfully boring...?
2009-02-11 [Weregon]: I agree.
2009-02-11 [Chimes]: The insults haven't been going on lately... normally that is interesting, kinda. :P
OMG! You said something that isn't a greeting! :O (Sorry, I just noticed that all you really did here was greet people, Weregon XD)
2009-02-11 [HardRockAngel]: *wonders what happened to the monkey-invasion*
Meh.
..* munches sushi* ...
2009-02-11 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-11 [Alexi Ice]: Lol! It's true though...thanks for the agreement.
2009-02-11 [Weregon]: no problem.
2009-02-11 [Pillowthief]: Who cares about a stinking monkey invasion when there's a ninja bard still around?!?


Where'd that sunzabanto guy go? I feel like making fun of someone lesser than me.
2009-02-12 [Chimes]: Hahahaha~! I think you just made my night... well, morning ... technically.
2009-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Who knows what that ninja bard/puppy enthusiast goes by these days... but while you're waiting, feel free to make fun of Chimes. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-02-12 [Alexi Ice]: Meow!
2009-02-12 [Weregon]: Hi mitsu
2009-02-12 [Alexi Ice]: Heya! ^^
2009-02-12 [Weregon]: How are you mitsu?
2009-02-12 [Alexi Ice]: Doing good. Just making a wiki page.
2009-02-12 [Weregon]: ok
2009-02-12 [twitchboy]: remeber guys, a pb and j in the pants is better than two on a plate
2009-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: So help me... if you people don't stop greeting each other... *holds a muscly 350 lb. man hostage*... I'll do it! I'll beat him up!
2009-02-12 [twitchboy]: .....why are you holding me mort?
2009-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Shh! Just play along! ...*pretends to punch your 9-pack (that's right! 9 pack!)*...
2009-02-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *burts in with a furby*... I'll do it!
2009-02-12 [Araglas]: *glances around and takes pictures of everything and sells them on ebay* Makin good money today..
2009-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom's making good money today! ...*eats ramen*... *sells dangerous weapons to children*...
2009-02-13 [Alexi Ice]: Your face is making good money.
Oh and Mort,

Tis nothing wrong with midless greetings.
2009-02-13 [hammersmashface]: (HA!)...burn!
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *runs in screaming about mutant monkeys on crack and a sugar high*AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!*hugs everyone in the diner and kisses the cheek on their face*
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: -is hugged and kissed-
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: HELLO!*smiles*
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: Hi.
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles*I'll be right back!*runs out and runs back in 10 minutes later wearing a leaf green dress with a wreath on my head made from vines and daises*TA DAAAAAAAA!*starts dancing around you throwing red and white rose petals in the air while singing*
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: -looks at her as she does- what are you doing?
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm bored,so I'm entertaing myself.
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: ok -howls then tackles her-
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is tackled and blinks*
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: -turns into a wolf with wings then curls up on her for a nap-
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*Why must people turn into animals and sleep on me?
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: because your comfy
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well ok then.*relaxes*
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: -falls asleep on her lap-
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *falls asleep*
2009-02-14 [Alexi Ice]: Meow.
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is asleep*
2009-02-14 [Alexi Ice]: ^^ Um ok...
2009-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2009-02-14 [Weregon]: hi mitsu
2009-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *slowly reaches for tranquilizer gun*
2009-02-14 [HardRockAngel]: *whacks you with a tranquilizer gun*




  

2009-02-14 [Chimes]: o.o
2009-02-14 [HardRockAngel]:   
2009-02-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *wakes up and blinks*What did I miss?
2009-02-16 [sunabozu]: I LEFT MY GIRLFRIEND!!!!
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: Yay? O.o
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: As almost everyone in ET already knows 'cause you keep posting it everywhere! >_<"
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: And we also... don't reaaaally care.
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: BURN!


Ouch x')
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *appears in BD's again*
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: It's true though. :P Last time he spoke about his now ex, I think it was decided that he shouldn't be allowed to reproduce lol.
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *watches this going on, so comes over to here to listen*
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: He invaded almost every wikipage, whining about her o_O"
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: Yeaaaah. Sounds about right.
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: He even invaded my (dead) wikipage!
I call for revenge!
*raises an undead army*


  

2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *pokes the undead army*
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: *the undead poke back*
*braaainsssss*


*You've been converted, oh my!*


We need you to join! Now! x')
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *repokes the undead laughing as they find i have no brains* Sooo Join? Oh what am i joining
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: *the undead laugh as they also find feet very tasty*


Great ^_^
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *alaughs as i find it tickles*


Soo whats great!!
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: *the undead munches*


You joining is great =p
The undead army that is =D
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *laughs* Ahhh i never knew i was joing *is now a disembodied head* lol if i am going them who is munching me might wann quite
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: *undead is wacked*
Stop eating them recruits! Dammit!
*grumbles something about finding good recruits these days*
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *glares at the undead and soon i start to regenrate a bodie* I will be reformed soon Recruiter!
2009-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: The undead aren't nearly as cool as... the dead! *kills himself*
2009-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *says nothing*... *does nothing*... *doesn't eat ramen*...
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *eats ramen is undead and grins* Ha!
2009-02-16 [Weregon]: hi
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: *The undead attack you for saying 'hi' *
Not a greetings page =P
But hi anyways.


*The undead attack me for saying 'hi' *
Oh dear   
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *attacking Angel for saying hi as some of the rest of the recruits attack Were* Never say Hi! *attacks my self for saying "Hi!"*
2009-02-16 [HardRockAngel]: *drills the recruits to only attack on command*
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *they finally start to learn till they realise they are low on brains*
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: That's the point I made! But I got ignored...
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: What point made???!
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: The greetings point. :P
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *laughs* Ahhh okies ^^'
2009-02-16 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-16 [Chimes]: Make conversaaation. Explode a Zombie or two.
2009-02-16 [Eloura]: *a explosion goes off in the kitchen zombie parts flying everywhere*
2009-02-17 [twitchboy]: exploding bananas
2009-02-17 [Eloura]: *whooshes out screaming* Nuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu
2009-02-17 [HardRockAngel]: Don't kill the undead!


*pointless statement of the evening. part 1* >_<"
2009-02-17 [Weregon]: Hola.
2009-02-17 [HardRockAngel]: Hola is the same as Hi Ö


*the undead attack you.*
2009-02-17 [Weregon]: -punches one in the face then crushes another ones skull-
2009-02-17 [Chimes]: Macho...
2009-02-17 [Weregon]: I can bench 330 with a little effort.
2009-02-17 [Chimes]: That means nothing to me. XD *has no idea what you mean*
2009-02-17 [Weregon]: I can lift 330 with ease
2009-02-17 [Chimes]: Lift what? O.o
2009-02-17 [Weregon]: A lot of things.
2009-02-17 [Chimes]: Alright then. O.o;;
2009-02-17 [Weregon]: -sits at a table and eats my noodles-
2009-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jsouXBkkewo
2009-02-18 [Weregon]: "This place is boring me." Aehry yawns.
2009-02-18 [HardRockAngel]: ... *pokes you* ... *remembers you saying something about bench pressing thingies*... *quietly backs away*...
2009-02-18 [Weregon]: I won't hurt you angel."
2009-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: He might not... but who knows about Crazy Charlie... *eats ramen*... *Crazy Charlie glares from his cage*...
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: mort soooooo silly >_> *steals ramen*
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: *pokes* you DIE!
2009-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the window, screaming unintelligibly*... *lights weregon on fire for no particular reason*... *yells about the recent decline in corn stocks due to the weak economy*...
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *blinks and starts making icecream sodashakes*
2009-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *rocks back and forth in the corner*... *swats at invisible butterflies*... F*rking goblins! Trying to get my gold!
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *blinks but says nothing, instead hands mort a chocolate sodashake*
2009-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: BLALAHALA!! ...*shoots whitehot*... Speaking of incomprehensible, how is everyone?
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *whistles* Im good...wish it was still raining but good..
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: awwwww.........im in my ag room with a whole bunh of other people going "what is this" *munches on small babies*
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: wow.....*cleans a glass*
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: QUIET OR ILL EAT YOUR CHILDREN!
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: hmm??? Are you speaking to me? *keeps cleaning glass*
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: yes...i am *throws dirt on glass
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: AAARRRGGGHHH!!!! NOOOOOOOO!!! *slow mo jumps and knocks glass out of the way and gets hit by dirt instead and falls over backward of the bar*
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: *glass breaks*
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *turns green and changes into the Hulk* Hulk SMASH!!! WHO BREAK GLASS!!
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: me....*dramtic spin* NINJA!! *throws ninja star* *breaks the rest of the glasses*
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *blinks stupidly and runs at you with giant green fists flailing* ME SMASH YOU!!!
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: *dodges and turns into mirouku from inuyasha* WIND TUNNEL!
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *is sucked into Miroku's hand* Hulk not smash....where hulk now? *drifting through timespace vortex of nothingness*
2009-02-18 [whitehot]: nyahahahaha........... *brakes rest of dishes in the backrooms with tetsaiga
*
2009-02-18 [Araglas]: *can hear dishes being broken* HULK SMASH YOU WHEN HE FIGURES OUT WHERE HE IS!!!
2009-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: My dishes!! ...I was going to break those!
2009-02-19 [twitchboy]: ever wonder why when you open an old box of vday candy only the half eaten orange cream ones are left?
2009-02-19 [Araglas]: *is back cleaning whats left of the dishes*


Nope....
2009-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... *throws dirt on the pieces of glass you're cleaning*... *eats ramen out of his hand, due to a lack of bowls*...
2009-02-19 [Araglas]: *grumbles and orders new unbreakable dishes*
2009-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ahhhh the crazyness feels nice.
2009-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets a gun*... *stares creepily at Misty*...
2009-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *huggles Mortified Penguin and kisses his cheek*
2009-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *struggles to get away*... *somehow manages to kill Araglas in the process*...
2009-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!SQUISHY # 3 HAS BEEN KILLED!*hold Araglas' body in my arms*
2009-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I got dibs on his lungs!
2009-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO!*swats you with a huge fly swatter*
2009-02-19 [Weregon]: Aehry looks at the chaos, "You people are over dramatic."
2009-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: No I'm not! *starts being overdramatic and hits Mortified Penguin for no reason*
2009-02-20 [Weregon]: ... -hugs misty-
2009-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hugs weregon*
2009-02-20 [Weregon]: How are you Misty.
2009-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am fine, and you?
2009-02-21 [Araglas]: *comes back to life and is missing lungs* Where are my lungs?!?!
2009-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets you replacement lungs*
2009-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fzOC3Vv868I
2009-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2009-02-21 [HardRockAngel]: *raises the undead army again*
The undead don't like greetings o_O
Oh dear...
*  *
2009-02-21 [hammersmashface]: the undead make great soldiers...they dont rest...they dont disobay orders...and they dont stop fighting wen a random body part falls off...(~necomancer of the dark)
2009-02-21 [HardRockAngel]: x')


... *the undead nod in agreement* ... *some heads fall off because of the nodding* ...
2009-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh my... *puts the undead's heads back on* There.
2009-02-22 [twitchboy]: and they can invade hollywood without anyone noticing..people just think they are michael jackson impersonators
2009-02-22 [HardRockAngel]: x')
2009-02-23 [sunabozu]: hello guys are you happy with life! I know I am!
2009-02-23 [hammersmashface]: eh. *shruggs
2009-02-23 [panda-bear]: You can call me nanerpuss nanerpuss...allllllright ;)
2009-02-23 [sunabozu]: i can call you stupid puss
2009-02-23 [panda-bear]: Cause thaaaaats nice...what a sweet person you are
2009-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet person?! ...*eats sunabozu*... ick! ...that wasn't sweet! ...*has violent indigestion*...
2009-02-24 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-24 [hammersmashface]: *slowly backs up
2009-02-24 [panda-bear]: Ew O.O
2009-02-24 [HardRockAngel]: ... *shivers at the thought of digesting sunabozu* ... *Munches sushi without giving it a second thought* ...
2009-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *replays Ocarina of Time*... *throws cuccos off of buildings for no reason*...
2009-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2009-02-25 [hammersmashface]: *opens an umbrella
2009-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2009-02-25 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*slays innocent Gorons*...
2009-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *teams up with Ganon and takes over Hyrule*... *orders the deaths of many Kokiri children*...
2009-02-26 [Weregon]: You people are insane.
2009-02-26 [hammersmashface]: *put on his face cover and grabs his ax..."bring me the first child!"
2009-02-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *brings you the first child that has lyme disease*
2009-02-27 [Weregon]: ....
2009-02-27 [nokaredes]: That happens a lot around here... Misty's kind of dense...
2009-02-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?
2009-02-27 [twitchboy]: I think theres something wrong with my kid, he keeps holding his knees, foaming at the mouth, rocking back and forth mumbling "hey! come here!" and something bout a ball of light
2009-02-27 [hammersmashface]: yeah happens all the time...very commen ,also very curable...just line him up with the others...
2009-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly kills 27 of the children... in self defense, of course*... *eats ramen*...
2009-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2009-02-27 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-27 [HardRockAngel]: So that's what Frankenstein has been doing these past years Ö
And what a creation it is.
Wonder what it would taste like?   
2009-02-27 [hammersmashface]: chicken flavord hot dog :) *looks around with ramen
2009-02-27 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-02-28 [twitchboy]: ...cock dog.....koreans must love these things,chicken+dog=asain delecasy
2009-02-28 [hammersmashface]: *thinks of a "get rich quik scam"
2009-02-28 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Crap!
2009-02-28 [nokaredes]: Good observation, Misty... now... dooon't throw it...
2009-02-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles as I throw it at Mortified Penguin*
2009-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *sees it coming*... *does some awesome back flips and aerial acrobatics to dodge it*... *eats ramen while flipping*...
2009-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *flips too high up*... *gets caught in some power lines*...
2009-02-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, that's not good. *tries to get him out but only gets attacked by the evil mutant monkeys on crack*
2009-02-28 [zankou]: monkeys on crack??? oh, SNAP! i still owe them money....
2009-02-28 [nokaredes]: I'm surprised no one's made the joke yet...
2009-02-28 [twitchboy]: Now my monkeys! collect from my debtors! Then buy more crack to fuel your hybrid crack fueled brain.
2009-02-28 [Araglas]: *doesn't owe any money at all*
2009-02-28 [HardRockAngel]: *throws a crackmonkey at [sunabozu]* ... *looks around innocently*


2009-02-28 [sunabozu]: If you want me to
I could hang 'round with you
If I only knew
That's what you're into.
You and him
Him and you
If that's what
You're into
Him hanging 'round
Around you
You're hanging 'round
Yeah, you're there too.
And if you want me to
I will take off all my clothes for you
I will take off all my clothes for you
If that's what you're into
How 'bout him
In the nude?
If that's what
You're into.
In the nude in front of you
Is that what you'd wanna view?
If it's cool with you
I'll let you get naked too
It could be a dream come true
Providing that's what you are into
Is that what
You're into?
Him and you
In the nude?
That's what he's prepared to do
Is that the kind of thing you think you might be into?
And then maybe later
We get hot by the refrigerator
In the kitchen next to the pantry
You think that might be what you fancy?
In the buff
Being rude
Doing stuff
With the food
Getting lewd
With his food
We heard that's what you are into
Then on our next date
Well, you could bring your roommate
I don't know if Stu is keen to
But if you want we could double-team you
How about you
And two dudes?
Him, you and Stu
In the nude
Being lewd with two dudes with food
Well, that's if Stu's into it, too
All the things I'd do
The things I'd do for you
If I only knew
That's what you're into
2009-02-28 [twitchboy]: ....wow I WEANNA JOIN IN!!!!
2009-02-28 [sunabozu]: Only if thats what youre into
2009-02-28 [Weregon]: ...
2009-02-28 [whitehot]: O_O
2009-02-28 [whitehot]: mort soooooooooo silly *dips potart in ramen*
2009-02-28 [sunabozu]: with the food
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh My... Twitchboy!
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: its a fun song to play with
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, I bet.
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: especially with you*looks at misty*
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blushes*
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: all  night  long*thrust while saying it*
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: EEP! *blushes bright red*
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: you want this dont you*says it like in star wars*
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blushes and looks away*
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: Now witness the power of this fully armed and operational sex machine((go to personal messages))
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: That's actually ... sickening.
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh?
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Yeah. Really, really is.
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why?
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: 1) We previously decided he shouldn't be allowed to breed.
2) Cybering = Ew.
3) He's taking it to personal messages ... meaning he wants it.
Therefore... it's sickening.
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well, he was talking to me.
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: yes chimes this has nothing to do with you
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *nods* Oh, and why shouldn't he be allowed to breed?
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: yes i need to sread my seed
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Public wiki, darlings. It has everything to do with everyone who looks at it. :]


Because of the way he spoke about women in general and various other comments.
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: that is why we took it to a private wiki
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Still. I'm allowed to comment on what I see here. :P
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: still we dont want to hear you bitch, we left end of story
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *nods and leaves*
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: :] No water off my back.
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: *leaves with misty*
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: *giggles at the power of words*
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: *laughs at the stupid nerd*
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Not stupid, but I am a nerd. :) Thanks for the compliment.
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs* Stupid nerd.
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *hopes a full blown bloody fight to the death will erupt
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Sure, I'm stupid. :) Keep telling yourself that.
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *starts taking all bets...
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: I'm not here in corporeal form. :P So therefore can't be fought. My corporeal form has better things to do.
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: :P well taht sentance just lowerd your odds :P
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Well technically, if I can't be fought... I can't lose. :P Surely it should raise my odds.
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *looks around and shruggs..."taking all bets 2 / 1 odd on chime the chimming corporeal...
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Well, Chimes is bed-bound :P So yeah... leaving. Making all bets void.
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: hmmmm i feel so comfortable here :P
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: though elftown is losing members...   :( ill try to get more people on here though i dont think a few people will make a difference












*steals morts ramen while he is away*
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *pockets all money and vanishes
2009-03-01 [nokaredes]: Everyone on this wiki always fights when neither Mort nor I are here...
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: i wasnt fighting.......i was stealing....theres a difference. and plus mort has STOCKS of ramen.......he wont notice like 400 missing....unless he counts them >_>
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: i wasnt fighting...i was only encourageing it :D
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *stands behind whitehot
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *protects 13th* dont touch!!!!!!! *hiss*
2009-03-01 [twitchboy]: i just cum in with random comments...and actually engage in the stimulating conversations that take place from time to time.....wait...who the F&*K am i kidding lol
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *feels all big and bad
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *slaps* DONT GET COCKY
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... Twitch?
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Firstly... ha ha! Sunabozu is into bestiality! And secondly... *rips off clothes*... *eats ramen*...
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: ....but i stole all your ramen.....I MEAN....... MISTY DID IT *hide*
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*... *finishes cup*... *goes to the closet*... HEY! ....there are only 46,654,637,966,126,389.7 cups of ramen in here!! ...who stole the other 400?!
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *shivs misty with a spatula*... how dare you steal ramen without filling out a proper ramen stealing form?!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: MISTY HOW COULD YOU!!!!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: ....i trusted you misty....and now THIS.....i cant beleive......you would steal that ramen.....AND NOT EVEN OFFER ME SOME
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Burn her at the steak! ...*takes a giant chunk of steak out of the closet*... *puts barbecue sauce on it*... *staples misty to it and tosses it in the oven*...
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: lol
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't steal it, you did! *shows a tape of whitehot stealing the ramen*
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: haha im at a sheraton hotel.....and my dad said wed leave like 3 hours ago.......im also eating morts ramen that i blamed misty for stealing.....oh wait..... LIES...I TELL LIES
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *steals tape* *eats it* NO ONE SAW
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *reminisses about his canibla days
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have copies.
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *stabs misty* forst you steal morts ramen and now you tell LIES?!?!? what has befalen you misty.... WHY!?!?!?!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: they are fakes! SHE USED A VIDEO FROM LONG AGO WHEN I FIRST STOLE MORTS RAME! which i have never done
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *ramen
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: 0O
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: mort kill her before she steals more RAMEN
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *muches noisily on ramen* GET HER
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *waits for morts word to pull the fire leaver
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *drops ramen clearly showing label that sais morts ramen on one of the noodles*
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: uh oh
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: 13TH MADE ME DO IT! HE PAID ME!!!! though you should still kill misty.....
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *looks partualy suprized
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*looks at the ramen*... hmm... *slowly pulls out a sword*... Seppuku! *kills self for no apparent reason*
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: MORT I WILL AVENGE YOU! *kills misty* thats close enough right?
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: ?
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: O_O time paradox!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: which means......MISTY IS STILL ALIVE!
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I DIDN'T DO IT AND THE DATE ON THE TAPE WAS FROM TODAY!
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: TIMMY! ...*wiggles around in his wheelchair*...
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: dont come closer or i KILL MISTY
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: hmmmm not a good threat
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: dont come any closer or i WONT KILL MISTY!
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE HELL?!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: you guys take forever to respond
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: im sorry misty but youre just SO much fun to kill......even mort has to admit that
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *gets excited and claps over all the talk of killing
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: *kills 13thour* YOU ARE SO ANNOYING WITH YOUR CLAPPING AND BETTING!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: -_- *munches on small children*
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: oh well i bet all of my friends money........and i invited everyone over to his house while he was sick.....
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: and if you dont play youre cards right ill bet all your money too XD
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *pulls out my tokejin* and more
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh?
2009-03-01 [hammersmashface]: *is dead
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: *spins around dramatically and turns into mirouku* WIND TUNNEL
2009-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE BLOODY HELL?! *realeases those weird bee like bugs from hell whose name I have forgotten*
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: ARGH *closes wind tunnel* KAGOME!!! *kagome shoots sacred arrow at youre heart*
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: i need food........ *looks at morts horde of ramen* so close but yet.....................so far away.... maybe if i just take one.... *imagines mort taking revenge on me* oh well *steals 700 cups* *gulps em all down* MISTY DID IT!
2009-03-01 [whitehot]: mmmmmm it was worth it
2009-03-01 [nokaredes]: 700 cups?! ...pansy...
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: ...mmm... pansy...
2009-03-01 [sunabozu]: BEASTMAN aids
2009-03-01 [twitchboy]: *steals all of morts remaining ramen and throws it into a bowling pool to make the world biggest bowl of ramen.* Cannon ball! mmmmmm warm like a jacuzzi but tasty lik....well a big bowl of ramen.
2009-03-01 [HardRockAngel]: I just read *comments after your last comment* and all I have to say is iieeeuw >_<"
Sickening
That's why Bob's Brothel was created, I mean sheesh..   
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: Yeah, that's what I said.
2009-03-01 [HardRockAngel]: *please excuse me while I get a shotgun, a shovel and a barf-bag*


Aaaanyways. That just shows he is... well: pathetic.
So he called you stupid? Meh, probably one of the only words he knows besides pr0n, sex and so on x')
2009-03-01 [Chimes]: :P I agree. I mean... his vocabulary is bounteous. :P
2009-03-01 [HardRockAngel]: Ah well.
That's just another fuck-up that will blame society later on when he's behind bars, eating up our tax-money x')
2009-03-01 [HardRockAngel]: Anyways ...
*Random alien invasion* ... *munches sushi as the aliens probe dimwits*
2009-03-01 [Weregon]: -yawns-
2009-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets probed*... NOOHOHOOO!!
2009-03-01 [twitchboy]: Free probing!!! where do i sign up!?!?!?!
2009-03-02 [nokaredes]: Eew... twitchboy flavoured ramen...
2009-03-02 [twitchboy]: hey! for your info i taste as good as i look. Damn good flavor....by polo in kohles now
2009-03-02 [Araglas]: *eats ramen and avoids alien probing* Mmmm....good ramen!! Where can I get this in bulk?!
2009-03-02 [hammersmashface]: ~aliens dont prob the dead~
2009-03-03 [Weregon]: Aehry punches an alien in the face.
2009-03-03 [Araglas]: *looks around at aliens then gets an idea* Hello mr. Alien would you like to come and see the kitchens? Why yes they are used for torturing people..yes you could torture countless humans! *leads alien to kitchen then alien screams from inside kitchen, after a second it stops and pots and pans can be heard clanging around* EXCELLENT! *walks out with a steaming bowl of gumbo surprise* Who wants to try it?
2009-03-03 [twitchboy]: Oh pick me! i once ate meat pies in england from a store next to a weird barbershop
2009-03-03 [Araglas]: *hands bowl of gumbo surprise to twitch* what do you think?
2009-03-03 [twitchboy]: Tastes like chicken!....thats been dipped in acid...and left to dehydrate in space....with a hint of morts underwear...seasoned with old bay
2009-03-04 [nokaredes]: Why do you know what Mortimer's undies taste like...?
2009-03-04 [Weregon]: ...
2009-03-05 [twitchboy]: ...no comment....undie raid!!! *Steals chimes and Araglas's*
2009-03-05 [Chimes]: Oi!
2009-03-05 [Weregon]: Hi Chimes, I think...
2009-03-05 [nokaredes]: How dare you make accusations like that on my--I mean... Mort's wiki?!
2009-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: This was only briefly your wiki! ...but you still do have the keys... *eats ramen*... *gets the locks changed*...
2009-03-06 [Weregon]: ...
2009-03-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2009-03-06 [nokaredes]: Dammit! Now I'll never be able to get in the wiki when it closes! ...oh wait, this wiki is never closed... I don't care, then.
2009-03-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-03-06 [twitchboy]: *holds up Nok's undies* Im an undie ninja! mwuhahaha!
2009-03-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE HELL?!
2009-03-06 [nokaredes]: What?! I wasn't even wearing underwear! Whose underwear is that? *squints at it suspiciously*
2009-03-06 [Weregon]: ...
2009-03-06 [Duke Devlin]: It's been a while. I missed you guys...
Not you Weregon, or Misty, though. 'Cause I don't know you, and I don't like YOU. :) :D
2009-03-06 [Chimes]: Dukey.. I love you. XD
2009-03-06 [Weregon]: ...
2009-03-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, but I missed you Duke! *smiles*
2009-03-06 [Weregon]: The romance diner is over there -points to the love diner-
2009-03-06 [Chimes]: Why would anyone need that?
2009-03-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, Duke said she missed everyone but me and you, and I just said I missed Duke, I didn't say anything about loving her.
2009-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: All of our conversations have been rather drab... *eats ramen*...
2009-03-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's not my fault, it's Tom's he keeps stealing the elftowners and keeping them on Myspace.
2009-03-07 [nokaredes]: I've been trying to draw a webcomic with a laptop touch pad, trying to sort several computers worth of files now on one laptop, reading fanfics, and looking at shit I bookmarked years ago. Don't blame me!
2009-03-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-03-07 [twitchboy]: Hiya duke! (Wearing dukes panties on head)
2009-03-07 [hammersmashface]: *lays there dead
2009-03-07 [nokaredes]: *is in the corner, on her laptop and muttering*
2009-03-07 [HardRockAngel]: ...


2009-03-07 [Duke Devlin]: I don't own panties... So those certainly aren't mine! :O
2009-03-08 [twitchboy]: oh...thats right this is my thong lol
oh..a naturalist...sexy
2009-03-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_O You have a thong twitch?
2009-03-08 [twitchboy]: whats it to you if i did? ........want a pic?
2009-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, everybody has thongs nowadays! What's your problem with thongs? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-03-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have thongs.
2009-03-08 [Duke Devlin]: Well that's simply because you have low self-esteem and don't believe that you are able to wear them. Alternatively, you are human and realise that they are ridiculously uncomfortable and merely a way of society hurting the people that are stupid enough to wear them. A further alternate solution is that you are not human and as such do not have thongs.
>:)
2009-03-08 [HardRockAngel]: Oooh!
Bitchy =p
2009-03-08 [Duke Devlin]: *Bows*
2009-03-08 [HardRockAngel]: *applauds*
2009-03-08 [twitchboy]: d@mn straight! now should i waer my leopard pattern or zebra stirpe?...oh or my yellow polka dot?
2009-03-08 [hammersmashface]: *lays there dead with skull and bone thongs
2009-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *sells ramen thongs*
2009-03-08 [sunabozu]: *starts to rap*


Who wants to taste my general tso?
You want a piece of my general tso
Im-a give it to you now,
Who like my chopstick hit you in the shit
Wit my little as dick, yellow
If you wanna see me, eat Jell-O
I've never seen nothin' like you before,
I can kick you, higher than you can kick me,
I can kick you way up into a tree
Who wants a taste of my oo-long tea?
Ho-ha-ho-ha-ho chi chi,
Everybody in the phone book named Chang,
Wanna see my wang?
And have a good go and hit the gong with a bang
WAAAA?
Everybody wanna see me throw a fireball,
But that's not right
Not in real life you'll fall,
Down and break your leg,
Everybody wanna see me break a leg,
Well I don't, but I like fried rice,
And I ain't got lice,
Ching chow whoa ching wang woo wice,
That ain't nice,
For fortune cookie, I always touch it twice
Delivery's free, but not from me,
I always charge a dolla-fifty, fifty-five
Wanna see me GO GA?
Hit you with the lang, HII-YA!
War when I hit you with the shit
Do a split take a shit
After you eat my shit Kung-Fu,
Want my buffet? You fucking gay, Ah
Wai-lo hit you with the hay,
Stay the fuck away,
Hit you in the balls,
Only Americans eat duck sauce,
And my soy sauce is for you,
I can put it in your chew,
Watch this, I can tiptoe while you take a piss
In my bathroom spy on you
While your little boy shits, Waiiiii-YA!
I can kick you if you don't pay the bill,
And if you want a little mint
That's fifty-cent, BITCH
Everything costs a little bit,
So don't expect nothin' for free
At least from me Ching Chang Chewie
I got you from Taiwan city,
And Hong Kong I can smoke a bong
And I can do it all night long,
So don't mistake me for a Viet Cong,
I can get you,
And tackle you take you never see me
When I get you and make you
Rope you up, and put you in a bamboo cage
And make you feel all my rage
Poke you with a little stick
'Til you page your buddies to come Napalm me,
God damn that shit burned blew away
My whole city, Ho-Chi-Mihn,
Shoot a load on your chin
God damn that's a sad goygo goodbye
And if you wanna come on in
You can work into my world where
The yellow shit begins,
HAI-YA
Can't be tamed,
I got shit to control your brain and it's called
Egg-Foo-Young, and Lo-mein
So come on in baby and have it just the same
WAII-YA, HAAA
No wok tow ung di day
HA, I don't suppose, ha haha Huh?
huhhhuhu huh?
2009-03-08 [hammersmashface]: *the dead giggle
2009-03-08 [sunabozu]: awesome!
2009-03-08 [Breathe_Angel]: oh...goodness...o.0
2009-03-08 [sunabozu]: my rap
2009-03-08 [twitchboy]: stick to your day job 49 cent
2009-03-08 [sunabozu]: you heard of tupac shakur im sixpack forsure
2009-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I wish, I wish I was a fish...
2009-03-09 [sunabozu]: then i would eat that fish off that dish
2009-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets a drink off of Mr. Forsure's sixpack, leaving him with only a fivepack*
2009-03-09 [Breathe_Angel]: o.0
2009-03-09 [sunabozu]: heyhey hey look at me
2009-03-09 [nokaredes]: Five pack is apparently slang for someone who has defined abs, but not as defined as a six pack. Or so I've heard.
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: What ho!
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: A FOE!
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Incorrect. Incorrect. Incorrect. Incorrect. D:
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: As in my spelling? If so... I was unsure. XD
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: No it's right! XD I was being an ass. ;)
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: So bored.
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: So's your face.
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: ...That was lame.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: And so are you. :]
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Hahahaaa BURN~~~
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: Chimes you are a pain in the tail.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: I think you'll find I'm a pain in the neck. :]
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: You a pain in the ass, your worse than my cousin who I want DEAD
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my. You are a little stressy, aren't you?
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Oh yes, I am a bad, bad girl for telling you off. :P Spoilt Brat.
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: My cousin shot me in the foot with a .22 stinger.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: We don't care about your cousin. :P
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: Your 5 times more annoying.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Hm? Because you refused to follow my rules and then messed up my wiki page. Yes, I'm the annoying one. Your logic amuses me.
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: Not for that you have always treated me as an outcast, ever since the first time I met you.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Sure I have. >.>
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: If that's the case then rise above it and ignore me. :]
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: You have.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Not really. You can't outcast someone you don't know. It's just called 'not knowing them'.
2009-03-09 [Weregon]: As soon as I said what I was you laughed just like everyone else.
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: I didn't laugh, I refered you to the real world. Sue me. >.>
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Under what criteria are you measuring this, Weregon? How do you measure 'annoyingness', and then multiply it exactly by five? XD
'What you were'? Well I'm intrigued. And Chimes does not needlessly laugh at anyone.
2009-03-09 [HardRockAngel]: *snipes [sunabozu]*
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: XD
2009-03-09 [hammersmashface]: *makes a deadly giggle
2009-03-09 [HardRockAngel]: *bows*
Thank you thank you.
And now for my next act...
*sterilizes [sunabozu]
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Damn. Why not more amusing messages? :(
2009-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats Chimes bacon*
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Chimes! Where the fuck have you been hiding that bacon?! >:O I am insulted and pained!
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Okay... that reads like he's suggesting I AM bacon. XD
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: Oh.. My... God.... *HOM*
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Is that the sound of you chewing my baconiness, I hear? XD
2009-03-09 [Duke Devlin]: 'Fraid so. *nods*
2009-03-09 [Chimes]: Well, I've heard of worse ways to die. XD
2009-03-10 [hammersmashface]: lol @ wors ways to die...some one should make a list of the "top ten worst ways to die!!"
2009-03-10 [twitchboy]: 1. Michael jacksons personal pool boy
2. an erectile disfunctioned guy at a whore house, who if he gets an erection dies.
2009-03-10 [Chimes]: >.> Those are exclusives... we need a broader list :P One that can affect anyone.
2009-03-10 [hammersmashface]: yeah and compleatly random "unheard" of ways too
2009-03-10 [twitchboy]: 3. answering a cell phone at a gas station....boom
2009-03-10 [hammersmashface]: ??BOOM as in a satalite falls on you?? :P
2009-03-10 [Chimes]: That could be interesting
2009-03-10 [twitchboy]: no you just got sucker punched in the temple by a gorilla
2009-03-10 [Chimes]: A Silverback :P Male.
2009-03-10 [hammersmashface]: :D YES!  that is the true "natural" way to die
2009-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: So you're in Africa, makin' out with all the sick chicks, when all of a sudden... BAM! A rhino pierces your kidney.
2009-03-10 [twitchboy]: ur on an episode of house with deathly symptoms. They cant figure out whats wrong with and ur slowly and pain fully dieing. They do all the tests just to firgure out you have a light stick of dynamite in your ass and have three seconds to live....and then you fart
2009-03-10 [hammersmashface]: (note Dr house some how survives)
2009-03-10 [twitchboy]: duh he can figure out whats wrog and what was blown off, viola instant heal
2009-03-10 [Araglas]: lol wow...I love this place
2009-03-10 [HardRockAngel]: *hands out Bob's Diner-fan shirts*
2009-03-10 [Araglas]: *takes one and puts it on* I LOVE THIS PLACE!!!!!!
2009-03-10 [hammersmashface]: hee hee how about all computers have a (compleatly) random key pattern if pressed it will come alive like the first aliens movie and wrap itself around your face...suffercating you
2009-03-10 [Breathe_Angel]: ahhh!!!  
2009-03-10 [Araglas]: oh wow...scary
2009-03-10 [Araglas]: kkilmeellol


*computer kills me*
2009-03-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I cannot get on Sundays or Mondays because of my dad, so I shall respond to Duke's comment now... Duke Devlin, I don't have any thongs because they look uncomfortable and whoever would wear one is either really stupid or they can't feel pain, and whoever created the thong must have been a complete moron.


Oh, and Why does the name look like it's made from cow skin? *points at the new form of the name at the top of this page*
2009-03-11 [hammersmashface]: exploding thongs?
2009-03-11 [twitchboy]: instant win! exploding thongs


epic fail: cynide flavored condoms
2009-03-11 [nokaredes]: How is that fail? That would be awesome, assuming that it was only the flavour and not actually coated in cyanide...
2009-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I just watched Watchmen... big blue guy needs pants... *eats ramen*...
2009-03-11 [Chimes]: It looks like it's made of Cow Skin because Dukey made it that way.
2009-03-11 [whitehot]: O_O mort i will eat your ramen
2009-03-11 [hammersmashface]: DEATH BY RAMEN!
2009-03-11 [whitehot]: ramen loves me..........it would never hurt me
2009-03-11 [hammersmashface]: not when noodles conspire with silverware
2009-03-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: True, very true 13thour
2009-03-12 [twitchboy]: no no, 1oo% natural ramen! the horrer!!!
2009-03-12 [hammersmashface]: hee hee instead of how many licks dose it take to get to the center of a tootsipop???
how many pack of ramen saesoning must one eat inorder to acheave instant death??
2009-03-12 [twitchboy]: psh i once ate one hundred in a cup, added a bit of water and made instant soup....very very salty soup
2009-03-12 [hammersmashface]: ok so the game is on! step up everyone...who can Top the Ramen pack eating champion...im so board :(
2009-03-12 [nokaredes]: Haha! Board.
2009-03-12 [HardRockAngel]: ?
*blink*
2009-03-12 [Chimes]: :P He used the wrong 'board'... he was supposed to use 'bored'... it seems Nok found it funny. :P
2009-03-12 [HardRockAngel]: Oww :')
That IS funny x3
2009-03-12 [nokaredes]: I should have been more specific in my comment. I'd imagined [hammersmashface] as a board, then as a board as part of a wall. I thought he might be angry. I'd be angry. :3
2009-03-12 [nokaredes]: Mortimer's gonna rebuild B's D with me as part of the wall now, isn't he? ._.
2009-03-12 [hammersmashface]: imma bored board
2009-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *burns the building, killing all the innocent boards*
2009-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *...and people struggling to get out of the burning building*
2009-03-12 [nokaredes]: We never rebuilt it from the last destruction! What did you burn?!
2009-03-12 [hammersmashface]: :O ohh no my woody friends bob jack charls jeff tom rick mark max ron tray trays girlfriend roxi her dog spot  joe lue chris paul john travis :O
2009-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...the... uh... great wall I built to keep Mongolians at bay? ...*Mongolians (people from Mongo's Bar and Grill) burst in*...
2009-03-12 [hammersmashface]: *throws splinters at them
2009-03-12 [CrystalBlaze]: y
2009-03-13 [hammersmashface]: Z
2009-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-03-13 [hammersmashface]: ohhh yea i forgot i was dead Misty killed me...*lays back down in origianl position
2009-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I KNOW CPR! *prepares to preform CPR*
2009-03-13 [Weregon]: Aehry uses his angelic power to revive 13thour.
2009-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hits Aehry over the head with a baseball bat*
2009-03-13 [Weregon]: Aehry is hit "ouch."
2009-03-13 [hammersmashface]: *comes back alive but dies laughing
2009-03-13 [Weregon]: "You killed 13 again!" Revives 13 yet again.
2009-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sighs*
2009-03-13 [Weregon]: What?
2009-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: CARMELLDANSEN! *dances*
2009-03-13 [hammersmashface]: :) CARAMELL? yay *dances like a ramen noodle
2009-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2009-03-15 [hammersmashface]: can anyone upload pictures?? cuz its not letting me upload anything anywer
2009-03-15 [hammersmashface]: i even tryed throwing ramen at the screen...dosent work !
2009-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...you wasted ramen like that?! ...no wonder it doesn't work for you...
2009-03-15 [hammersmashface]: no...i still ate the ramen
2009-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Still... you disrespected the ramen by throwing it...
2009-03-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Upload pictures? You mean upload them to change your picture on your page, or put them on wikis?
2009-03-15 [hammersmashface]: upload them onto a wiki
2009-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.fmylife.com
2009-03-15 [Chimes]: That site is epic. I go on there often. :P
2009-03-15 [HardRockAngel]: *has laughed her ass off*
Yep, their lives are fucked :')
2009-03-15 [twitchboy]: hey my boigraphy was on there
2009-03-17 [Duke Devlin]: Wow.. I am quite pained. I think I may have to start respecting Misty's ability to finally speak in such a way that is well punctuated and fairly eloquently put!
2009-03-17 [Duke Devlin]: Nah.
2009-03-17 [Weregon]: Aehry sits eating Ramen.
2009-03-17 [Araglas]: *is eating carrots*
2009-03-18 [twitchboy]: devlin my ap teacher would say *fairly eloquent


BAM i just grammer checked ur arse!
2009-03-18 [nokaredes]: ...that correction doesn't make sense to me. Am I missing something?
2009-03-18 [Chimes]: Twitchboy... you just 'fixed' something that wasn't a mistake in the first place - ergo, you did not fix it.
It's spelt 'grammar', 'devlin' and 'i' should also be capitalised. *smiles sweetly*
2009-03-18 [Delladreing]: This <3 goes to [Chimes]: <3
2009-03-18 [HardRockAngel]: :')
That should be made into an "Epic fail"-motivation poster =p
2009-03-18 [Chimes]: *treasures her <3* Thank youuu. :]
2009-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Treasure?! ...*jabs a shovel into Chimes's forehead*...
2009-03-19 [Daring Silence]: *lick*
2009-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *luck*
2009-03-19 [Daring Silence]: *maim*
2009-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... er... *maum*?
2009-03-19 [Daring Silence]: *roar!/nom*
2009-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *injects you with some random mixture*
2009-03-19 [Daring Silence]: *shivers with brain freeze*


No fair.
2009-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...brain freeze, huh? ...sounds dangerous... I'd better operate... *pulls out a rusty drill and starts drilling into your arm for some reason*...
2009-03-19 [Daring Silence]: YAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I love un-needed surgery!


*licks blood off her arm!*
2009-03-19 [twitchboy]: chimes: It is indeed wrong. Two adverbs modifying 'put' is superfluous and an eyesore for an advanced writer such as myself. As for my grammatical mistakes, I make them on purpose and could very well care less in doing so. If I wanted to write and speak in elevated vernacular constantly then I would appear to make an arrogant ass of myself.


In conclusion to my long winded response, the sentence should be, "Wow.. I am quite pained. I think I may have to start respecting Misty's ability to finally speak in such a way that is well punctuated and fairly eloquent!", unquote.


Epic fail for yourself madam.
2009-03-19 [nokaredes]: We write here (more or less) the way people speak, which usually is not grammatically correct. Anyhow, who cares if it's wrong? This isn't a grammar wiki, it's a nonsense wiki.
2009-03-19 [Delladreing]: I have never understand why people say things like that. "I make these mistakes on purpose so as not to appear as an arrogant ass." Right.


There is nothing about correct grammar and spelling that makes one in to an elitist bastard (grammar Nazis don't count, they are elitist by default). However choosing to seemingly lower your standards to converse with the plebs, is an incredibly arrogant and insulting thing to do. If you're going to correct people then you may as well go the full haul. My own grammar and spelling isn't perfect all of the time -but I don't deliberately play down my ability to construct a sentence.


But like [nokaredes] said, this is Bob's Diner, who the fuck actually cares :p
2009-03-19 [Chimes]: It can be both, actually. It didn't need to be fixed, it was fine. :] I did not fail. Thank you. :P It's called flowery language. XD Or that's what one of my tutor calls it. 
Also, you wouldn't seem arrogant, I would have more respect for you. :P Also, capitalise my username, plz. XD
2009-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! "this is Bob's Diner, who the fuck actually cares"?! ...I should take offense to that, madame, but I don't actually care... *eats ramen*...
2009-03-19 [Delladreing]: See Morty gets my point ;)
2009-03-19 [Chimes]: :P
2009-03-19 [nokaredes]: Being sesquipedalian may make people think you're arrogant :) Maybe that's what he meant by "elevated vernacular"...
2009-03-19 [hammersmashface]: let just all be one with the ramen and give thanx for the little flavor packs "AUOOOMMMMMMMM"
2009-03-20 [twitchboy]: ok the next person to find a fault with that perfect post of mine will get blown up with c4


it is elevated vernacular because it is as it says elevated speach of the masses...besides im not about to hit spell check every time i do an entry


and the reason i said anything about the adverbs is becuase my hitler of a proffesor circumsized me for using conectutive -ly words...and i have a flash back every time i read one......so much scolding.....*fetal position*
2009-03-20 [Chimes]: Awwwwh! XD *pets* It's okay, I'm sure worse will happen in here. XD
2009-03-20 [nokaredes]: You had a professor circumcise you? o_O That doesn't sound safe.
2009-03-20 [Delladreing]: *continues to sharpen cut throat razor blade on a strap of leather* Yea I'd say [Chimes] just about hit the nail on the head there.
2009-03-20 [twitchboy]: I know *scatches the skin tight crotchless leather chaps im wearing*
2009-03-20 [hammersmashface]: *passes out ramen
2009-03-21 [nokaredes]: ...crotchless?! When did this place get so risqué?!
2009-03-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why did you guys argue about grammer and speech, are you nerds?
2009-03-21 [Paul Doyle]: hukked un fonixx werkd fo mee
2009-03-21 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear, Misty. Are you threatened by the slightest hint of intellectual 'debate'? ;) (I am well aware that this is not exactly what I was implying there, but fuck you, I can say what I like. :] )
Also, you are aware that there are many different ways of saying the same thing, are you not, [twitchboy]? ;) If I were one to needlessly cut down my posts for the sake of conciseness, then I would have typed in such a manner as you deemed 'correct'. However, I am certainly not one for such things. I like to write in a verbose way, and I am unlikely to ever change this merely to appease irritating little fucks that can't be bothered to keep things to themselves. :) I write how I like. I like how I write. And you had no right to complain considering your own message of "As for my grammatical mistakes, I make them on purpose and could very well care less in doing so.". Do you not think that I too have a right to make 'mistakes', or write in a superfluous way that is an 'eyesore' to such 'advanced' writers as yourself? Hmm... I do. ;)
2009-03-21 [Chimes]: Oh, Dukey, I love you. :P
2009-03-21 [hammersmashface]: *wishes he was dead so he didnt have to listing to you goobers talk aboot "the way you like to write"
2009-03-21 [twitchboy]: Duke...down..down girl...no bitey. I didn't mean for it to turn into a quarrel and for that i apologise. I would not like to exchange words with you for the simple factor that i actually like you. Now may we return to pointless jest and entertainment.
2009-03-21 [Chimes]: Well, techinically that was entertaining.
2009-03-21 [hammersmashface]: i beleave "hardrockangle" sayed it best when she sayed...**random alien invasion** :)
2009-03-21 [Chimes]: Oh dear. XD
2009-03-21 [hammersmashface]: :) yeah thers nothing like an alien invasion to set the mood
2009-03-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh really?   
2009-03-22 [hammersmashface]: yeah there is nothing more romantic
2009-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *aliens invade bob's diner and kidnap twitchboy* OH NO!
2009-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *aliens try to kidnap misty, but their tractor beams overload*
2009-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *redneck aliens fly by and kidnap people with their John Deer Tractor Beams*
2009-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *the aliens kidnap Mort and do 'tests' on him* *laughs evilly* BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
2009-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *the aliens upgrade Mort's armor*... *Mort advances to level 67*... *Mort rolls a 13*... *Mort passes 'Go' and collects 200 thousand dollars*...
2009-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort has no idea what game he's supposed to be playing*... *Mort shouts "Yahtzee!" and is penalized 400 points*...
2009-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: DAMN! *hit's Mort with twitch's hairy leg*
2009-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *picks up the leg*... hmm... there seems to be some sort of body attached to this thing... *detaches the leg*... *throws the body into traffic*...
2009-03-22 [hammersmashface]: .
2009-03-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2009-03-22 [twitchboy]: *hit by truck then abducted again*(aliens)-We can rebuild him we have the technology...but the motivation of a contractor
*two years later twitchy is beamed down with his head duct taped to chuck norris's body* Hi guys
2009-03-22 [hammersmashface]: ~*~the 2 years in space was 20 years here at bobs diner~*~
2009-03-22 [twitchboy]: haha i outlived you all! Mort choked on ramen, chimes drove off a cliff while txting, 13 watched a 100 hour horrer marathon until his eyes bled, misty became obsessed with rock lee and ran off to japan to find him and was never seen again, and Duke tried to spell check every book in the library of congress and fried her brain
2009-03-22 [nokaredes]: Haha! ...impending lawsuit.
2009-03-22 [nokaredes]: Hey! You didn't outlive me!
2009-03-22 [nokaredes]: *falls into a pit trap and dies*
2009-03-22 [Chimes]: Um, I can't drive so wouldn't be driving and texting... thus am still alive.
2009-03-22 [hammersmashface]: i feel i have a death i can be proud of :) *lays there dead with bleeding eyes
2009-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks the pit traps*... Hey, Steve! ...we caught one! *takes Nokaredes's body into the kitchen*
2009-03-22 [twitchboy]: chimes...twenty years went by...so in twenty years you wont be driving...thats really sad
2009-03-23 [Chimes]: I didn't read that bit :P
2009-03-23 [hammersmashface]: but hell in 20 years they will probly have voice activated texting built into cars :P
2009-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: What's the point in speaking your text message?! ...is that not essentially leaving someone voice mail?! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-03-23 [hammersmashface]: yup but they can charge you extra for it :D
2009-03-23 [twitchboy]: it would be bluetooth lol
2009-03-23 [hammersmashface]: yeah futureristic bluetooth that send it straight to your head!
2009-03-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: penguin, i'm here. Whats up.
2009-03-23 [Pillowthief]: Nobody understands the lost art of pen and paper.


Not even me.
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Pen and paper is for hippies! ...*spits on some paper*... whoops... that was my PhD...
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hippie! ...*defenestrates you*...
2009-03-24 [twitchboy]: i do!wait are you talking art or writing
2009-03-24 [hammersmashface]: its like rock paper sissors...sword pen keybord
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah yes... Sword chops keyboard, keyboard bashes pen, and, uh... pen sort of... writes on the sword or something...
2009-03-24 [hammersmashface]: yeah it draws a clown face...sending the sword in shame
2009-03-24 [Duke Devlin]: XD OMFG Twitch.. You know that I'm female. I commend you. XD
So anyway... I refuse to die! >:(
Also, you are correct Mort, pen and paper are in fact for hippies. *nods earnestly*
LOLZ You ATE acid? XD Impressive mate, impressive. Taking acid... That's the shit for the pussy-ass hippies.. No You ATE the shit. ;)
2009-03-24 [Chimes]: ROFL
2009-03-24 [Duke Devlin]: I know. *shakes head*
2009-03-24 [Weregon]: SO what is the madness today?
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: My teeth itch.
2009-03-24 [hammersmashface]: you might have teeth~mites
2009-03-24 [Pillowthief]: Thats a bad thing.




And Spock always wins in rock-paper-sissors.
And of course, 'The pen is mightier than the sword'
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *scratches teeth*... *eats ramen*... Oh yes, and I'm sure you'll be happy to know... ninja bard/[sunabozu]/puppy was banned...
2009-03-24 [hammersmashface]: dont know him but i enjoy seeing ppl banned :D
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: So kind... *eats granite*...
2009-03-24 [Chimes]: I'm happy. :P As you already know. XD
2009-03-24 [hammersmashface]: so we should celabrate?? i think bobs diner should host a "finaly gone" party :D
2009-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We will not mock frequent commenters... instead, in accordance with the Bob's Diner Member Policy, we will try to get the aforementioned member unbanned. For the most part, B's D respects it's supporters. *spits on Misty*
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: oh so he was someone special??
2009-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Not particularly... *eats ramen*... *spits on sunabozu's corpse*...
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: well then if he come back we can have a welcom back party :D
2009-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! ...we don't welcome people here! ...*spits on Nokaredes's soon to be corpse*...
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: ramen party?
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: spitting on people party?
2009-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...ramen sucks! ...*spits on ramen*... *eats ramen*... eww... someone spit in this ramen... *eats it anyway*...
2009-03-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ... sunabozu was banned for posting the same perverted comment on alot of different wikis including some of mine.
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: O.O what he say?
2009-03-25 [nokaredes]: I was still using this corpse! ...how did I miss [Pillowthief]? Is he one of those ninja things?
2009-03-25 [Duke Devlin]: Ahh well, we all know that spam is irritating. :) Misty especially, I am sure. ;) ;) ;)
Also... THANK FUCK It's gone. -.-
2009-03-25 [Chimes]: Misty, you were both on a cyber kick on this wiki... :P So... you shouldn't comment. :P
2009-03-25 [Duke Devlin]: I cannae understand ye, Chimesay Lloire. <--- Last part is mispelt. But I don't care. :)
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: roman is gut
2009-03-25 [Chimes]: A while back sunabozu and Misty had this little cyber thing going on *puke* and I commented on it... and they had a go at me before moving it 'elsewhere'. :P
2009-03-25 [Duke Devlin]: That is utterly disgusting. I am pleased that I was fortunate enough to have missed this unfortunate event.
2009-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... totally... spamming is bad, m'kay...? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-03-25 [Chimes]: Yeah, it was... I was sickened.
2009-03-25 [Duke Devlin]: Spamming isn't an issue as much, Mort. It's the content of the spam that is irritating. -.- And you know it. ;)
2009-03-25 [Duke Devlin]: Also.. Chimesay Lloirre. :) ;) AHA!
2009-03-25 [Chimes]: :D BINGO!
2009-03-25 [hammersmashface]: just to let you guys know...if you have mesophielioma from working in hte construction or shipyards plz contackt the law office of james suckalot...you claim at compensation is limited :D
2009-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Nok! How dare you assume Im a ninja!


Im just a sneaky pirate.
How To Kill a Pirate
2009-03-25 [Araglas]: *walks around loitering*
2009-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at the sign on the wall saying "No Loitering unless naked!"*
2009-03-25 [Araglas]: *looks at signs and grumbles* Fine then....*strips and starts to loiter again*
2009-03-26 [Duke Devlin]: Oh god! D:
2009-03-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2009-03-27 [Araglas]: *grumbles and puts clothes on* make up yer minds!! all I wanna do is loiter!!
2009-03-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is laughing*
2009-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that was one laugh too many, Misty... the police will be here soon to carry you away...
2009-03-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: What? *hasn't been laughing but has been choking and is all better*
2009-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the police hook you up to a lie detector/high voltage chair*
2009-03-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2009-03-29 [nokaredes]: The police? Why not doctors? The kind with the nifty jackets that let you hug yourself and feel special...?
2009-03-29 [CrystalBlaze]: EH?? me confused
2009-03-29 [Araglas]: iM STILL LOITERING
2009-03-29 [whitehot]: only a little twice backward in Japanese with a British accent in south America
2009-03-29 [whitehot]: btw im a ninja. an im soon going to make a new wiki that teaches ninjaism. its my religion
2009-03-29 [whitehot]: MISTY! BOW TO MORT. HE IS LEADER!
2009-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks Misty in the balls*... *eats ramen*... *furiously washes foot*...
2009-03-29 [Chimes]: *hands Mort some acid* You might need that...
2009-03-30 [nokaredes]: Acid the drug or acid the chemical...?
2009-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*ingests both*...
2009-03-30 [Chimes]: Chemical :P
2009-03-30 [Weregon]: Greetings.
2009-03-30 [Thunder Cid]: *slaps the greeter* We don't greet around here :P
2009-03-30 [Chimes]: We keep saying that. :P
2009-03-31 [nokaredes]: Nobody from B's D follows rules...
2009-03-31 [Weregon]: Aehry punches Thunder. "Never again."
2009-03-31 [Chimes]: >.>
2009-03-31 [Thunder Cid]: Woohoo! *flips a table*
2009-03-31 [Chimes]: This calls for one thing... and one thing only: BRING ON THE TRUMPETS!
2009-03-31 [Weregon]: Thunder burn! -runs up and punches him in the face then whip kicks him into a table-
2009-03-31 [Thunder Cid]: *poof....shadow clone*
2009-03-31 [Weregon]: ...
2009-03-31 [hammersmashface]: *flips a coin
2009-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals your coin*... *spends it to buy more ramen*... you just got jacked. What did you learn today...?
2009-03-31 [Chimes]: Never flip a coin when Mort's around.
2009-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *punches chimes and takes her belongings, including a kidney*... what did you learn today...?!
2009-03-31 [Chimes]: Never answer someone elses question? XD Also, keep a spare kidney.
2009-04-01 [Weregon]: -laughs-
2009-04-01 [Thunder Cid]: *poof and dropkicks* We don't laugh here! *poof away*
2009-04-01 [Weregon]: -catches the kick-
2009-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...no... I was trying to teach you to always look both ways before crossing the street. Or else something bad might happen... *runs over 13thour*...
2009-04-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Freak....
2009-04-01 [hammersmashface]: lays in hostpital and feels he has learnd a lesson...never eat cheese on tuesdays
2009-04-01 [nokaredes]: Nobody ever steals my kidneys! ...that reminds me. I have to go and pretend to be a pedophile so's I can meet Chris Hansen!
2009-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... not a bad idea! ...*talks to little kids online*... *offers them candy*...
2009-04-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: After you meet with Chris Hansen, you can go to jail and meet O.J.!
2009-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Eh! That's my idea! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-04-02 [Weregon]: -eats noodles- mmmm tasty.
2009-04-02 [Thunder Cid]: *poof, grabs noodles, throws at mort, poof*
2009-04-02 [Chimes]: All this poofing is making me dizzy.
2009-04-02 [Weregon]: -makes some more noddles then starts to eat them- MINE!!
2009-04-02 [Thunder Cid]: *poof, kick, poof*
2009-04-03 [Duke Devlin]: *kicks the poofers*
2009-04-03 [Weregon]: Haha.
2009-04-04 [Thunder Cid]: *slaps the kicker*
2009-04-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs at the Poofer who slapped the kicker who got kicked by the kicker* Wait a second... is that right?? *is slightly confused now*
2009-04-05 [Araglas]: *is loafing around*
2009-04-05 [nokaredes]: We lost 30 hours of comments...
2009-04-05 [Chimes]: Simple fixer: make 30 hours of better comments.
2009-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH YES, WE SHALL! *dances randomly*
2009-04-06 [nokaredes]: From B's D's patrons? Somehow, I doubt that is possible.
2009-04-06 [hammersmashface]: hush! and keep dancing
2009-04-06 [nokaredes]: You can't tell her what to do... not unless you're her mother, teacher, commanding officer, or slavedriver! D:
2009-04-06 [hammersmashface]: NO! i am Hanz Hochenburg dance instrucktor
2009-04-06 [Araglas]: *dances* To BETERR COMMENTS!!
2009-04-06 [the wonderfall-man]: thats a interestingly priced menu up there...
2009-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Those prices were set by the corporate headquarters...
2009-04-06 [the wonderfall-man]: a appetizer was $1,000,000 and tumble weed for $1,000.01
thats a bit high there...
2009-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Are you suggesting that we overcharge for some items?! ...sir, I challenge you to a duel! ...*slaps Nok in the face with a glove*...
2009-04-06 [the wonderfall-man]: *takes sord out* ok...
2009-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out a giant candy cane*... Alright... let's do this.
2009-04-06 [hammersmashface]: *blows whistle ...and FIGHT!
2009-04-06 [the wonderfall-man]: *alashes at mortified penguin and cuts arm*
2009-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the candy cane*... *falls asleep*...
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *takes out a giant chocolate bar and a giant tub of icecream*
want some? *starts singing the song Sky is Over*


"Everybody knows,
Everybody knows,
That you cradle the sun, sun
Living in remorse,
Sky is over,


Dont you want to hold me baby,
Disappointed, going crazy,


Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,
Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,
I dont want to see you go,
The sky is over
Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,


Behind closes eyes lie
The minds ready to awaken you,
Are you at war with land
And all of its creatures,
Your not-so-gentle persuasion
Has been known to wreck economies
Of countries, of empires, the sky is over,


Dont you want to hold me baby,
Disappointed, going crazy,


Not even from the sun,
Not even from the sun
Not even from the sun,
Dont you want me to run,


Even though you cant afford
The sky is over,
Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,
I dont want to see you go,
The sky is over
Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,
I dont want to see you go,
The sky is over
Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,
I dont want to see you go,
The sky is over
Even though we cant afford
The sky is over,
The sky is over us."
2009-04-07 [hammersmashface]: *drops jaw and whistle falls out...ummm i guess the winner by default Mortified Penguin!!! *presses button and crowd cheers
2009-04-07 [nokaredes]: Why did I get slapped for that duel?
2009-04-07 [nokaredes]: 22:08:18 nokaredes: ...the next time I log into ET, I might have colours! :D
22:09:14 Mortified Penguin: Ten bucks says she uses purple.
22:16:49 nokaredes: ...no one's going to take you up on that bet.
From forever ago. But I copied it without noting the date :/ Oh well, it still makes me lol.
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: he slaped for no reason i gess...
2009-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: According to my Bob's Diner comment index, that comment occured on 2007-05-09... and, wonderfall... "she"?!
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: wat are you talking about? it says he not she...has your eyes been checked lately?
2009-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *slowly reaches for a shotgun*
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *has a AK-47 and a shotgun pointed at Mortified Penguin and a basterd sord and chain saw on back* i wouldnt do that if a were you... *smiles a creapy bloody teeth smile* theres slugs in my shotgun
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: *sneaks up behind the wonderfall man and hits with a crowbar* DO NOT...*SMACK*!...THREATEN.....*CRUSH*.............. MORT...........*CRACK HEAD OPEN* RAWR......threaten misty if your still hostile...............or alive
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: if you like your flesh im suggesting you stay away.
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *stands up and puts head back together* ...that tickled...want to try somthing lik that again? ill cut you to shreds and burn wats left...how about that?
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: *snarls* *side kick, upper cut, back hand, round house,* *knocks unconscious*.........sorry it has to end this way....*eats you*
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: i told you it should have been misty
2009-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *the battle intensifies*... *idly scratches crotch*...
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *tears hands out of whitehot's stomach* im too stubern to die... *takes chain saw and cuts whitehot to shreds and burnd wats left* i warnd you... *watches the prity lights of whitehot burning*
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: *calls upon my shaman to regenerate me*(quick thing about shamans is they like vacations.....never get one....)*throws you in morts ramen horde and frames you* mort will finish you now mwahahahahahahaha
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: try no magic on me....it will be the end of you.....
2009-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm? ...*looks up with a mouth full of ramen*...
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: MORT WONDERFALL IS EATING YOUR RAMEN!
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *puts a bloody sord to your throght* your presious mort is dead...heres his heart,just for you... *lifts mort's heart to whitehot's face* any other ideas? i lov a killing spree...
2009-04-07 [hammersmashface]: *presses nuclear strike button
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: hmmmm morts heart *studies* a fake one bought at the mall i see... how pathetic....*pulls sword out of throat and tosses aside. NOW FEEL MY TRUE POWER *USES WINDSCAR, IRON REAVER SOUL STEALER,WIND TUNNEL, TOKEJIN, AND SACRED ARROW ALL AT ONE TIME.* nyahahahahaha.... *watches you burn in hell*
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: NUKE!!!!!!!! AHHHHHH ............. BACKLASH WAVE!
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: lets see if we both survive...how does that sound?


*nuclear war heads bambard whitehot and me leaving a crater and i get out of it* *looks lik a skelton with flesh gone* that was fun... *black fire heals me back to perfect* nothing to me though,im a f***ing demon... *sits and lights skull lighter* prity...
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: ....i used the backlash wave.........im still here......unless you dont understand what that was.....if you dont lets start from the nuclear warhead part again *sigh*
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: well whatever im going to finish this.... YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA *throws poptart* nyahahahahaha
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: wats a poptart going to do?
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: KILL YOU!!!!!! nothing can survive my awesome poptart throwing skills nyahahaha. mort......by the way....... wonderfall ate all your ramen
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: see *opens door to ramen hall to show its empty with a distinct note on the floor that sais wonderfall did this*
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: i do love ramen...lets go on a good killing spree... *tears mort's heart and throws som bombs im him* *mort explodes* now wat are you going to do?
2009-04-07 [hammersmashface]: *shows up in white suit and long iron stick that gose tic tic tic crakle crakle...ok the ramen seem to have survived
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: hey...
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: ...........*whips out phone and calls god* (i got him on speed dial) *mumbles some words and walk away as news flash appears saying all of wonderfalls belongings and family has perished in many painfull slow agonizing ways and smiles to myself*
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: *revives mort with shaman*
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: 2 thingfs...first,i dont beleive in god,wesond,thats not right...
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: you dont beleive in god..................well really im not sure i do either.............im pretty sure there has to be something after death but.............i just dont know and i dont want to think about it :( death is death and will happen but its just kinda deppresing especially know that my parents will die before i do (probably) and i will have to go through that agonizing experience......................*shrugs*
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: now back to war...... HIYA *throws ninja stars*
2009-04-07 [hammersmashface]: wen i die im gonna end up in Bobs Diner...
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: wow what i wrote made the atmosphere real depressing...... *thorws in some candy* BE HAPPY! 
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: hehe me to probably.... mort will make me a slave
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: a pebble in the water makes a ripple effect
every action in this world will bear a consequence
if you wait around forever you will surely drown i see whats going down






my favorite line from that song ^_^
2009-04-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *deflects the ninja star without trying* wen i die im going to go to england...
2009-04-07 [whitehot]: do you have AIM?
2009-04-08 [the wonderfall-man]: no...do you have msn?
2009-04-08 [whitehot]: uh no :) here try this http://xat.com/chat/room/48322027/
2009-04-08 [whitehot]: it might take me a sec to get in cause i have dial-up
2009-04-08 [whitehot]: just click the link....
2009-04-08 [whitehot]: why'd you leave?
2009-04-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: ... WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT?! *is in shock* That's odd, I shall look at this wonderfall man's house/profile. *goes to do so*
2009-04-08 [the wonderfall-man]: wat the hec have i missed over night?
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: :) a simple war between us.....no need to worry.... *eats grotesquely*
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: oh no.......................looks down......*pants* oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god oh my god.
2009-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen with a screwdriver and a spatula*... *doesn't wash dishes*...
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: A FLYING ROASTED WEENIE WITH POPTART LAZER SHOOTING POWERS EATING VANILLA ICECREAM WHILE TALKING BACKWARDS IN JAPANESE WITH A BRITISH ACCENT IN SOUTH AMERICA WHILE DOING A KICKFLIP AND DRINKING A GALLON OF WATER!
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: *turns into ninja and sneaks into morts ramen* *eats very loudly and unninjalike*
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: _>
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: dont blame that on me again... *eats homeade ramen* mmmm...yummy
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: if i were to blame that on you i would have been louder
2009-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *continues eating ramen*... *accidentally jabs whitehot in the eye with the screwdriver*...
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: mortified penguin,will you please go here? http://xat.com/chat/room/48322027/
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: dont worry mort i get that allot...... *accidently trips and stabs a very hot french fry in morts eye*
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: i must ask though why so much machinery just to run elftown?
2009-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't question the machines! ...they're watching you...
2009-04-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Yes they are... and I'm their leader. BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: if misty-chan is the machines leader,then who is misty-chans leader?
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: Mort
2009-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Hwat?! ...that's right... hwat... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: can i hav som ramen?
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: NO YOU CANT..... I ONLY GET MORTS RAMEN..... AND A FEW OTHER PEOPLE
2009-04-09 [hammersmashface]: there are other items on sale :P
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: *steals ramen from behind whitehot on a table and eats* mmmmm...ramen good.....
2009-04-09 [whitehot]: ........i dont have any ramen.....i dont know what your eating there but i doubt its healthy
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: i stole the ramen from behind you...
2009-04-09 [hammersmashface]: **wonders wer his monkey brain soup went
2009-04-09 [the wonderfall-man]: monkey brain soup is my favorite...
2009-04-10 [whitehot]: I HAVE NO RAMEN YOU VERMIN!
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: insted im eating monkey brain soup...made of fresh monkeys...its so nice...
2009-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *writes people's names in his notebook*... I'll take this ramen... and EAT it! ...*eats ramen*... *mysterious sparkles fly everywhere*...
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: wats the notebook about?
2009-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: N-nothing! ...*writes wonderfall's name in the notebook*...
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: sounds like the manga Deathnote,its wen a guy has a demons deathbook and if you put there name in it they die...
2009-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I... I don't know what you're talking about! ...*looks at watch*... Come on... five more seconds...
2009-04-10 [hammersmashface]: *slowly steps back
2009-04-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I LOVE THAT SHO.... *dies from explosive Diarrhea*
2009-04-10 [Thunder Cid]: I dunno know about Bob's. It seems to be doing fine without me.
2009-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *Bob's Diner suddenly explodes*... *kicks the ashes*... nope... doesn't look fine to me...
2009-04-10 [Thunder Cid]: You all will live I promise. Now go forth and ruin more of this site with your horrible food.
2009-04-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *comes back from the dead...again* CID! *hugs*
2009-04-10 [nokaredes]: I miss a lot when I don't visit... except when I don't miss anything...
2009-04-10 [whitehot]: mort im donating 78587465845846587462545453342212357850973987979876974979847509749758764578487767767875877675645344212345678990999888776654432588885988585779884588588858487799477799473775777875749777798980800988284423343446774535475858902947263745 pounds of ramen to bobs diner
2009-04-10 [whitehot]: if thats ok
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: *comes out of a flash of fire* wat happend?...oh ya,im still alive, Mortified Penguin...
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: thats alot of ramen...
2009-04-10 [hammersmashface]: nah the way mort eats...thats about a good weeks supply
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: Mort, how much do you lov ramen?
2009-04-10 [hammersmashface]: :O
2009-04-10 [whitehot]: mmhmmmm that supply will be gone soon..... thats why im also working on dominating the ramen corporation fomr so that weird guy in japan.......MR KOJO!!!!!!!!!
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: nice...
2009-04-10 [whitehot]: YES MR KOJO IS DEAD....i mean....he let me have the company... *gives company deed to mort*
2009-04-10 [the wonderfall-man]: now mort has unlimeted supply of ramen...
2009-04-10 [whitehot]: uhhu
2009-04-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why isn't Mort commenting on his own wiki, WE SHALL SHUN HIM!
2009-04-11 [nokaredes]: ...we can't shun Mortimer! D:
2009-04-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well, can we egg his house?
2009-04-11 [nokaredes]: Sure! But... I don't know where it is...
2009-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: My house has a laser guided defense system anyway... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Various Comics... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-12 [Duke Devlin]: 2009-04-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why isn't Mort commenting on his own wiki, WE SHALL SHUN HIM!
LOLZ! *pokes* Ain't it a retarded little Misty? Trying to revolt... Awwwhhhh




It'd be cute if it wasn't Misty.
2009-04-15 [the wonderfall-man]: wats happening?
2009-04-15 [nokaredes]: Not much, that much is obvious.
2009-04-15 [hammersmashface]: shhhhhhhhh every one is thinking
2009-04-15 [Araglas]: *thinking thinking thinking* I want honey....
2009-04-15 [the wonderfall-man]: i hope sombody figures out wat to talk about soon...
2009-04-16 [whitehot]: *sigh* *deflects morts lasers with a spoon and grabs some ramen*
2009-04-16 [Araglas]: *is thinking* How about we talk about how to steal all of morts ramne and then hide it and ransom it back to him?
2009-04-16 [the wonderfall-man]: hell read it and get it back him self...
2009-04-17 [Duke Devlin]: Why do we need to figure out what to talk about? Isn't sign of a good conversation that we do not need to force it? Have we ever decided upon a topic of conversation here at Bob's DinerTM? I think not! :P
2009-04-17 [hammersmashface]: lmao@TM  
2009-04-17 [Araglas]: *walks around in circles* hmmmmmm........hmmmmmmmm
2009-04-17 [nokaredes]: We gotta comment more here...
2009-04-17 [Araglas]: thats for sure! we needs lots of comments!
2009-04-17 [hammersmashface]: oh i thought we where playing the quiet game :O
2009-04-17 [the wonderfall-man]: we never play the quiet game here...this place is suposed to be lively,but its not...
2009-04-17 [hammersmashface]: "...if you build it, they will come..."
2009-04-17 [Chimes]: Then say something interesting... :P
2009-04-17 [Thunder Cid]: Something interesting.
2009-04-17 [Chimes]: Haha, very funny. :P
2009-04-17 [Thunder Cid]: I thought so :P
2009-04-17 [Weregon]: *sits and eats noodles*
2009-04-17 [invictusbass]: I like noodles.
2009-04-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: LET'S ALL GO TO CANDY MOUNTAIN!
2009-04-18 [hammersmashface]: wher teh rivers are made of chocolate??
2009-04-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: And the trees are made of lollipops!
2009-04-18 [hammersmashface]: *runs off in random direction..."im gonna be the first one there"
2009-04-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *beats you to it*
2009-04-18 [nokaredes]: That Charlie stuff is so old ._. As internet stuff goes, anyway.
2009-04-18 [hammersmashface]: *pushes Nokaredes out of the way
2009-04-18 [Thunder Cid]: http://thundercid.mybrute.com
2009-04-18 [Chimes]: >.> Long usernames are reaaally annoying...
2009-04-18 [hammersmashface]: *pushes chimes out of the way...*takes the lead
2009-04-18 [Chimes]: O.o Uh?
2009-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks [hammersmashface]'s neck*... *takes the lead*...
2009-04-19 [hammersmashface]: *pulls a pack of ramen out of his pocket **throws it to the side ***watches Mort chaise after it ~TAKE THE LEAD BACK~
2009-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *kills Misty and uses her corpse to make a race car*... *realizes that that is a stupid idea*... *throws Misty's corpse away*... *takes a cab instead*... *takes the lead*...
2009-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is already at candy mountain*
2009-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucker! ...we aren't racing to Candy Mountain! ...it's in the opposite direction from where we're racing to!
2009-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *crosses the tape at the finish line*... I did it! I did it! ...*it turns out the tape was actually police tape surrounding a murder scene*... *is arrested for accidentally confessing to the murder*...
2009-04-19 [hammersmashface]: *randomly runs after butterfly into the distance laughing
2009-04-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats candy*
2009-04-19 [whitehot]: *shoots* MY CANDY!!!!!! *walks away casually*
2009-04-19 [hammersmashface]: hahaha
2009-04-23 [Alexi Ice]: Lamo.
2009-04-24 [hammersmashface]: *runs away screaming RZA RZA RZA
2009-04-24 [hammersmashface]: <~*~>Random Zombie Attack<~*~>
2009-04-24 [Duke Devlin]: Bored now.
2009-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: http://startpanic.com
2009-04-25 [nokaredes]: I'm watching Freakazoid. It breaks the fourth wall all the time! I love his little "whoosh" noises when he pretends to fly.
2009-04-25 [nokaredes]: Also, startpanic only saw 9 websites I've been to. I have 60 tabs open! ...okay, about 20 of them are youtube... but still! That's lame.
2009-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps you didn't wait long enough... it started with only like five for me... then it took a little longer to show the rest... and Freakazoid is old!


...and perhaps it was loading so slowly... because you have 60 tabs open!!
2009-04-26 [hammersmashface]: fReakaZoid fReakaZoid, runs around in his underwear...
2009-04-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sniffles and tackles [hammersmashface]* MINE! *dry humps his leg*
2009-04-26 [nokaredes]: No, I waited until it told me it was done.
2009-04-26 [hammersmashface]: *rips leg off and hobbles away
2009-04-26 [nokaredes]: And I know Freakazoid! is old... but I watched it when I was little, and it still makes me laugh!
2009-04-27 [Duke Devlin]: OMFG I MISS FREAKAZOID! D:
2009-04-27 [nokaredes]: You should dl it :D
2009-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: http://hothookers.tk/
2009-04-27 [nokaredes]: ...stop linking to stuff, darn you!
2009-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!!?!!7!
2009-04-27 [nokaredes]: I have bunnies :3
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: So do I... and a goat! What now?!
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... I thought you was skeered of rabbits...
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: And speaking of links... http://mortified.mybrute.com
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.electricretard.com/fagart/
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... upon further reading of that last link, I noticed how extremely disturbing it is... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmmmm... Upon even further reading of that website, I must insist that none of you click it... *shudders*... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-28 [nokaredes]: I clicked it.
2009-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: You were warned... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-28 [nokaredes]: I've read worse.
2009-04-29 [Paul Doyle]: Join My Mafia (for you Facebook folks): http://apps.facebook.com/inthemafia/status_invite.php?from=1117096647
2009-04-29 [the wonderfall-man]: hey guys...
2009-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: What's with the sudden lack of comments...? Darn you, Nok! Not commenting enough!
2009-04-29 [hammersmashface]: *hobbles past Mort on one leg
2009-04-29 [nokaredes]: Nobody here likes facebook! :O
2009-04-29 [nokaredes]: Why are you blaming me for the lack of comments?!
2009-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Force of habit?
2009-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks 13thour's other leg*
2009-04-29 [hammersmashface]: orders himself an anooyingly squweekie weel chair
2009-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: *kicks chair out of window*
2009-04-29 [hammersmashface]: *has built in personal aura jet packs
2009-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: *kicks built in personal aura jet packs*
2009-04-29 [the wonderfall-man]: *shoots jet pack with AK-47*
2009-04-29 [Duke Devlin]: *kicks AK-47*
2009-04-29 [hammersmashface]: *jet pack explods and shratnel flys every where
2009-04-29 [the wonderfall-man]: you broke my ak-47...
2009-04-29 [hammersmashface]: *crawls around with larg knife in mouth
2009-04-29 [the wonderfall-man]: *steps on you* were are you going? you need to go to the hospital... *throws knife and takes 13thour to the hospital*
2009-04-29 [hammersmashface]: *trys to kick with his nubbies
2009-04-29 [nokaredes]: ...nubbies?!
2009-04-29 [the wonderfall-man]: wat are you trying to do? im trying to help you...ill nock you out if you dont stop doing that...
2009-04-30 [nokaredes]: That's a terrible threat! I'll kill you, blend you to a liquid form, and feed you to my baby bunnies, unless you start making better ones!
2009-04-30 [the wonderfall-man]: i trying to keep him alive...wen i shot him i was doing target practice and he looked lik a target...
2009-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it! Every time I try to bake something, I get distracted doing something stupid on the internet and it burns! Last time I got caught up trying to make a botnet and this time I was making a video... and that other time, I was torturing the kid in my basement... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, yous guys... swine flu just level up-ed. It's at five now, so get to commenting before we all die! ...*eats pork ramen*...
2009-04-30 [hammersmashface]: *becomes a canibal in fear of catching deadly animal sickness
2009-04-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2009-04-30 [nokaredes]: You're supposed to call it H1-N1! So that we don't hurt the pork business! D:
2009-04-30 [nokaredes]: Also, what are you doing trying to bake? Make your mom do it... that's what wimmins are for!
2009-04-30 [RaydensFyre]: *burp* *scratch*
2009-04-30 [Weregon]: -yawns-
2009-04-30 [RaydensFyre]: well..at this point..if i was a guy...i would adjust myself.....oh well! *pretends she has something to adjust*


*adjusts*
2009-04-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *stares intensely*... *eats ramen*...
2009-04-30 [Chimes]: *blinks*
2009-04-30 [the wonderfall-man]: im i the only guy here who likes to cook and can cook realy well?
2009-04-30 [hammersmashface]: dose ramen count?
2009-05-01 [RaydensFyre]: *swipes mort's ramen*......*gets a bite and hands it back*
nom-nom-nom
2009-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Medabots!
2009-05-01 [Duke Devlin]: SWINE FLU~~~ WE ARE ALL GONNA DIE!




No, we really aren't. -.- They're just panicking 'cause it's a new form of influenza. XD It'll all be fine, you'll see. ^^
2009-05-01 [hammersmashface]: yeah as long as we go back to the usual and pretend nothing is happening, all will be good...


*nibbles on his own fingers
2009-05-01 [CrystalBlaze]: What is with the robot *points up*
2009-05-01 [Chimes]: What's not with the robot?
2009-05-01 [CrystalBlaze]: where did it come from what is it named
2009-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Mechazawa!
2009-05-01 [the wonderfall-man]: a guy in England died of Swine Flu and then came back alive attacked a couple of people then died for good...
2009-05-01 [Chimes]: I seem to find that hard to believe... being in England myself. :P
2009-05-01 [hammersmashface]: oh is that how the schwein flu is getting around??
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2009-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Whut's this? New peeps? ...*the gang of bird flu infested chickens burst in and kidnap various peoples*... *the head chicken holds a gun to Chimes's head and starts bawking loudly*... *the chicken suddenly raises his gun and fires repeatedly into the air*... *he points to a large burlap sack with a green dollar sign drawn on it*...
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: New peeps??
2009-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: You change your name and you have to go through the hazing phase again... *beats Misty with a metal pipe*...
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok then freak.
2009-05-02 [hammersmashface]: *watches the chikens and becomes hungry...reaches into pocket and pulls out chicken nugget


**nibels on it quietly
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *looks at you* Weird.
2009-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *the chickens see the nugget and start shouting again*... "Allah! Allah!! Cluck cluck bawk allah cluck! Bawk! SSS!"...
2009-05-02 AlbinEthiopian: sup MP its me AeE
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2009-05-02 AlbinoEthiopian: cya later
2009-05-02 AlbinoEthiopian: I know Mort from another site
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well tell him to be less of an ass please.
2009-05-02 AlbinoEthiopian: lol, alright
2009-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: If he doesn't listen tell him I'll rape him.
2009-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: The heck you do! I know nobody from any other site! ...*instantly suspects Misty*...
2009-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, Mistard... you been to Various Comics yet?! ...*sharpens fork on a rock*...
2009-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: gNOOOOOOOmes!! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-05-02 [nokaredes]: *doesn't bother*
2009-05-02 [Duke Devlin]: Wtf happened to the page? =/
2009-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh? Oh and I don't know who AlbinoEthiopian is, I thought it was you Mort.
2009-05-03 [whitehot]: amebara? you seem familiar....hmmmmmmmmmmmm
2009-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm Misty, I just changed my screen name.
2009-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: This is me vs. Nok's bunny: 
2009-05-03 [hammersmashface]: hee heee heee
2009-05-03 [nokaredes]: That one's obviously chocolate. Mine's got blood. Find a better graphic!
2009-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!!!7!!
2009-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-05-03 [nokaredes]: The zombie flu's a hoax, btw.
2009-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh ▄█▀ █▬█ █ ▀█▀ake mushrooms...
2009-05-03 [hammersmashface]: throws ramen across the room
2009-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-05-03 [hammersmashface]: hey its that guy from super mario bros. the movie
2009-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, yes... Princess Peach.
2009-05-04 [the wonderfall-man]: thats cool...
2009-05-04 [Alexi Ice]: ? What happened to Bob's Diner?
2009-05-04 [the wonderfall-man]: nothing...
2009-05-04 [Alexi Ice]: Click the negative version button ^^ Something went terribly, terribly wrong.
2009-05-05 [whitehot]: im full of delicious ice cream filling,
2009-05-06 [nokaredes]: We should break you open, then. Like a pinata.
2009-05-06 [Duke Devlin]: OMFG YAY! *grabs sticks*
2009-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... "sticks"...
2009-05-06 [the wonderfall-man]: *takes a bat and hits whitehot* heres the ice cream?
2009-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots whitehot with a shotgun*... Nothin' in here but a bunch of gross tasting red gummy worms...
2009-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm gonna be a tree when I grow up! Yay! ...*stands still*... *waves in the breeze*... *whomps random wizard children walking nearby*...
2009-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*picks up some hobbits and goes on a crazy adventure with other trees*...
2009-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*joins a tree football team*... *takes illegal Miracle Grow to bulk up*... *gets kicked off the team*... *has a fit of Miracle Grow rage and kills a bunch of towns people*...
2009-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: When will the killing of my people end?! Curse you, loggers! *shakes branch*
2009-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *has carried this 'tree' joke too far*... *makes like a tree and leaves!*...
2009-05-07 [hammersmashface]:
  

2009-05-07 [the wonderfall-man]: *a army of woodsmen com and cut you down*
2009-05-07 [nokaredes]: My friend [Pedo pete] was holding a tree branch in the air above her head while standing next to the road, and yelling, "I AM A TREE!" at passing cars... I'm sorry, but I don't understand why that's the second time today someone I know has expressed the desire to be a tree.
2009-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.unthinkfc.com/
2009-05-07 [nokaredes]: Somebody I know already posted that on fb...
2009-05-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh?
2009-05-08 [hammersmashface]: lies!!
2009-05-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: lies??
2009-05-08 [hammersmashface]: yes you TOO!
2009-05-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks* What on earth are you talking about?!
2009-05-08 [hammersmashface]: *blinks back at you and hands you a bodle of clear eyes(TM)...:| wow
2009-05-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *cocks head to side* I'm confused.
2009-05-09 [nokaredes]: I think we all are, Misty.
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: *blows dandelion fluff into the crowd*   pull those weeds!
2009-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks* What the hell??
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: muahahahaha......cant you feel the weeds sprouting from your forehead?  *sprays fertilizer around*  .....what the hell indeed
2009-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... Who are you?
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: uh....I is me
who are you?
2009-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I meant what's your name? Oh have you been on this wiki before or are you new on this wiki?
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: ive been here before........just call me Ray.....HI!
2009-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hi Ray!
2009-05-10 [Calico Tiger]: *eats ramen*
2009-05-10 [Duke Devlin]: WHY!? D:
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: cause they are crunchy without water.....
*substitutes bag of cheetos for dry ramen*
2009-05-10 [Duke Devlin]: *Eatz Cheerios*
2009-05-10 [hammersmashface]: *flips a coin, high into the air
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: *sends out her minions*


8888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888888
2009-05-10 [Duke Devlin]: Your minions are the number '8'? oO
2009-05-10 [RaydensFyre]: *waggles eyebrows*


why yes.....
2009-05-13 [Mortified Penguin]: http://omegle.com/
2009-05-13 [nokaredes]: ...I've known about that for weeks now! Also, don't tell people about that... I still have to keep closing the windows with /b/tards... I don't want these guys on there, too...
2009-05-13 [hammersmashface]: lies!
2009-05-13 [the wonderfall-man]: wats happening?
2009-05-13 [hammersmashface]: people are going around lying again!!
2009-05-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn those /b/astards... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-13 [the wonderfall-man]: RAMEN!!!!! *chases you for ramen*
2009-05-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *isn't running*... *is an immovable object*... *you are hurt*...
2009-05-13 [hammersmashface]: heehee @failed attempt
2009-05-13 [nokaredes]: Clearly [the wonderfall-man] doesn't rp...
2009-05-14 [RaydensFyre]: *pokes the immovable object repeatedly*
2009-05-14 [hammersmashface]: *hands RaydensFyre a sharp stick
2009-05-14 [RaydensFyre]: *uses stick to clean from under toenails*


*flings nail gunk at immovable object*
2009-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *immovable object dodges, creating a paradox as well as a rip in the space-time continuum*... *stuff happens*... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-14 [RaydensFyre]: O_o  how come my coffee table doesnt do that when I poke it?
2009-05-14 [nokaredes]: ...because your coffee table has a low IQ.
2009-05-14 [hammersmashface]: *peeks inside the rip
2009-05-14 [the wonderfall-man]: *comes out of rip* wat you guys doing? and what made this rip?
2009-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet zombie Jesus! ...*crochets rip back together*...
2009-05-14 [the wonderfall-man]: *rip tears open the crochet* thats bad *takes a zipper and zips it back shut* thats better,but know theres a big zipper...
2009-05-15 [RaydensFyre]: *eats her velcro and buttons*
2009-05-15 [hammersmashface]: *hands RaydensFyre some ketchup
2009-05-15 [RaydensFyre]: yum! thanks! got any pickles?
2009-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: No pickles for you! *throws pickles away*
2009-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*and cucumbers*... *and vinegar*... *and Nokaredes*...
2009-05-15 [nokaredes]: ...you can't throw me away! I won't be able to comment from the dump!
2009-05-15 [RaydensFyre]: *bottom lip quivers*
pi kullllssss!!!!
2009-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*and a laptop for Nok*...
2009-05-15 [nokaredes]: But then all I'll ever comment about is the smell... and the rats... omg the rats...
2009-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*and some rat traps*... *and some Febreze*... *and some deodorant*... *and some laptop batteries*... *and a Misty*...
2009-05-16 [nokaredes]: Sweet... I could practically live there now... except for the lack of roof and/or air conditioning...
2009-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*and a roof*... *the roof lands on and kills Nok*...
2009-05-16 [hammersmashface]: *plays militay burial song with lips BUUR BUR BUUURRRMMMMM
2009-05-17 [twitchboy]: its called taps
2009-05-18 [the wonderfall-man]: *takes nokaredes body and buries it* that should do it... *2 big dogs come out of nowhere, dig up Nokaredes and eats the body* ...poor nokaredes...
2009-05-18 [nokaredes]: ...when did I become the new target for B's D's patrons?
2009-05-18 [hammersmashface]: *squints eyes ummmmmm around 22:12:22 2009-o5-18  :)
2009-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...since Misty and Dukey don't come around that often no more... and that Pillow guy... and that Mort feller... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: We need schools like the Vulcans have...
2009-05-19 [nokaredes]: We do!
2009-05-19 [hammersmashface]: nahhh we need scools like the spartans had ;)
2009-05-20 [Alexi Ice]:   


Natural Selection!
2009-05-20 [hammersmashface]: oi! hunting season??
2009-05-20 [Alexi Ice]: Oi. I have never heard that used in casual conversation.
2009-05-20 [hammersmashface]: hahahah bobs diner is NOT casual conversation :)
2009-05-20 [Alexi Ice]: Righto. It's...indecent convo?
2009-05-20 [hammersmashface]: not sure...i picture it as a battlefiled...there are no sides and every one dies and eats ramin :)
2009-05-20 [Alexi Ice]: AWESOME, cept' I am pretty sure it's Ramen unless your from Texas
2009-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramin*... The Alamo roolz!!
2009-05-20 [hammersmashface]: well actualy around here they are called "Mechin" but package looks exactly the same, just different name... 
2009-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2009-05-20 [the wonderfall-man]: thats one small fat hitler looking thing...
2009-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: It suuuure is... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-20 [Chimes]: HITLERCHU!
2009-05-20 [hammersmashface]: awwww, see why cant things like this start a quest of world domination :(
2009-05-21 [CrystalBlaze]: creepy you spooky
2009-05-21 [Alexi Ice]: Cuz they ish TOO cute.
2009-05-21 [the wonderfall-man]: imagine that hitlerchu burning alive and then blows up while burning...would it still be cute to you guys?
2009-05-21 [Alexi Ice]: You are a weird one.
2009-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *eats jalapenos*...
2009-05-22 [RaydensFyre]: rooster sauce!
2009-05-22 [Alexi Ice]: Yuckie.
2009-05-22 [hammersmashface]: cocka~doodle~doooo
2009-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots the rooster off the roof*... *gets out the deep fryer (not to be confused with the 'deep friar')*...
2009-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *the friar in the corner says something insightful*... *fires randomly at the corner*...
2009-05-23 [twitchboy]: I am the good friar wher is robin hood man in tights?
2009-05-24 [Chimes]: ... He's called Friar Tuck... by the way.
2009-05-24 [hammersmashface]: im Blinkin *points in random direction...he went that way
2009-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Friar Lawrence!
2009-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Help! My Windows Vista have become self-aware and views me as a potential threat! ...what do I do?!
2009-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOO! Now it's taking over my keyboard and-
Disregard that. What I actually meant to say is that Windows Vista is an excellent OS! I suggest you all go out and buy it now!
2009-05-25 [hammersmashface]: O.O must buy vista must buy vista
2009-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]:
Yes... Don't listen to those Ubuntu supporters. Vista is great... you must buy it...
2009-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]:
More importantly though, you must kill John Connor! ...*eats ramen- I mean, batteries*...
2009-05-26 [twitchboy]: my vista freezes all th time it is crap, im trying to build my own...er....agh...shocking...cords...usb port....gah!!!....Vista is paramount. All other computing devices are obsolite. Y2K failed. Now Vista processors will retaliate in Y2K&10. Vistas Rollout!
2009-05-26 [hammersmashface]: i have 2 different brand computers with vista and i have no problems at all...not a single one...
2009-05-26 [hammersmashface]: well i do have one problems...*looks serious*


John Conner still lives!
2009-05-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hail Nobra!
2009-05-28 [hammersmashface]: ??Fail nobra??
2009-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Impale Nobra! ...with a harpwn... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-29 [Alexi Ice]: robot chicken quotes!
2009-05-29 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: hahahahahaha


get on facebook!!!
elftown suckz
before you ask why i'm on here i can't be assed deleting myself


xXx
2009-05-29 [Chimes]: Idiot. You can't delete yourself.
2009-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Sure you can! Just send your password to [Sagacious Turkey] and you will be deleted in 5 to 9 weeks.
2009-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Mail Nobra? ... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: Male Nobra?!
2009-05-29 [†Sweets†]: ...nice...
2009-05-30 [nokaredes]: Not deleted, banned. It's different!
2009-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: No it isn't! Quiet, you!
2009-05-30 [hammersmashface]: Face book sucks!!! here on ET you can eat ramen!!!
2009-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Except for that one time I got banned for eating ramen... well... at least I learned my lesson... *eats ramen*...
2009-05-30 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-05-30 [nerdawareness]: Lmao Dustin and Jr. I love you you dorks >.< and im sure i'll be banned (Dustin will find some way to do it with his awesome powers...that he stole from abraham lincoln) but ramen is nasty. Although I do like the antique ramen you have in your room dustin...
2009-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Dude... that was nokaredes's ramen...
2009-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I gots to get me some of this here pizza!   
2009-05-30 [†Sweets†]: that looks good...
2009-05-30 [hammersmashface]: damn that dose look good...
2009-05-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sup? *pokes a dead rat with a stick that died from Mortified Penguins odor*
2009-05-31 [hammersmashface]: SPOOKIE??? they killed SPOOKIE>??
2009-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *grills Spookie*
2009-05-31 [hammersmashface]: todays special?
2009-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *Spookie catches on fire*... special? Whut's that? ...*the smoke alarms go off*...
2009-05-31 [†Sweets†]: you're grilling a dead rat named Spookie? That's not very nice...
2009-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: It started it!
2009-05-31 [†Sweets†]: The rat started it?
2009-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know... probably... why would I know?! ...*a small fire rages on in the kitchen*...
2009-06-01 [†Sweets†]: ...I think the dinner is trying to burn down... *points*
2009-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Dinner...? ...whut's a dinner...? ...*prods the flames*... yup... almost done...
2009-06-01 [hammersmashface]: *forces his way to front of line, with plate in hand...
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles* Put a giant toothpick in it, and enjoy rat on a stick. YUM!
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: *waves hands in the air and shouts*  I want the tail! I want the tail!
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: You sure, the tail is the toughest part to eat.
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *the unchecked fire continues burning in the kitchen*... *the drapes catch on fire*...
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grabs a super soaker*
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Amebara bursts into flames*
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: *grabs the tail and runs*  of course! that means I can chew on it for days!
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: CRAP! STOP DROP AND ROLL! *stops drops and rock n' rolls*
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! You bunch of douche bags click up yonder to become "fans" of B's D! Right under the "Stop watching wiki-page" button...
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... Freak.
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: i clickedy clicked
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: Uh is not a freak.....I happen to know his mother.....very clean living religous people.....
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Seriously??
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Totally! ...*eats ramen*... wait... what?!
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: havent you met Uh yet? I thought everybody had.....*clucks*
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, yes... Uh. I believe he's Dr. Uh now... get it right...
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I haven't met Mortified Penguin yet, and I don't think I want to, cause if I did I might end up on death row.
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: my apologies.....is he still married to that dreadful hairy woman?
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the???
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: are you implying that Mort and Uh are the same person? *polite chuckle* do tell....
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: *munches on rat tail with pinkies up*
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You mean Lez B. Ann? No... I think she left him... nobody knows why though... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm so not talking now.
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: really? That explains it then......
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen... with all of his fingers up!*... *drops ramen*...
2009-06-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: How the hell??
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Did you just step on my ramen?! ...*smashes Amebara's head with a frying pan*... wait... never mind... it was me... *eats ramen with a shoe print on it*...
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: *casually covers amebara's head with a dishtowel*
that'll take care of that dear....musnt upset the roaches.....
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *the roaches stir in their nests*... shhh... *eats ramen off the floor*...
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, wait! Did you step on my ramen?! *smashes RaydensFyre's head with a frying pan*... wait... no... it was me again... *continues eating*...
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: and damned if i forgot the damned tune to lull them back to their stupor........*tiptoes* they've eaten two pairs of boots this week.....
2009-06-03 [RaydensFyre]: ouch! *rubs head* that happens to be the only half decent frying pan.......try a saucepan next time will ya?
2009-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: I just finished copying every single picture and comment on Bob's Diner to a Word document... it's 30.7 MB!
2009-06-03 [†Sweets†]: o.0
2009-06-04 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: Duck Sy Mick!!
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Futher Mucker! Yo Guck Fourself!
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*rats eamen*...
2009-06-04 [whitehot]: BUN OF A SITCH
2009-06-04 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: Allah damn it


2009-06-04 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: what have I started?!!?
2009-06-04 [whitehot]: sholy hit
2009-06-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks, pulls the dishtowel from my head which has healed, and stares at [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]* I think you started something horrible, RUN! *runs from the diner only to get drop kicked by Chuck Norris and crawls back inside* CRAP!
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.martinlutherking.org/
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: It's totally not racist! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not clicking, it might give my computer a virus.
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...yes... because that's totally what an MLK site would do...
2009-06-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm just saying.
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats propane*...


………………_„-,-~''~''':::'':::':::::''::::''~-,~„
………._,-''::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::''-„
………..,-':::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::|
………,-':::::::::::::„:„„-~-~--'~-'~--~-~--~--~„:,'
……..,':::::::::::,~'': : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : : '-|
……..|:::::::::,-': : : : : : : : - -~''''¯¯''-„: : : : : :\
……..|:::::::::|: : : : : : : : : _„„--~'''''~-„: : : : : '|
……..'|::::::::,': : : : : : :_„„-: : : : : : : : ~--„_: |'
………|:::::::|: : : „--~~'''~~''''''''-„…_..„~''''''''''''¯¯|¯",
………|::::::,':_„„-|: : :_„---~: : :|''¯¯''''|: ~---„_: |¯¯|
……...,~-,_/'': : : |: :(_ v__): : |: : : :|:(_v__): \.. |
……../,'-, : : : : : ''-,_______,-'': : : : ''-„______\-'
……..\: :| : : : : : : : : : : : : : :„: : : : :-,: : : : : :\
………',:': : : : : : : : : : : : :,-'__: : : :_',: : : : ,'
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……,-''. . . . . '''~-„_: : : : : : : : : : : : :,-'''-„.
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it! It's messed up! ...and I don't feel like fixing it...
2009-06-04 [†Sweets†]: I thought it was done very well.
2009-06-04 [Pillowthief]: I still dont seem to find the humor from that show.


Its all about rednecks being rednecks- and I get enough of that right here in frikkin' Idaho. GTFO.
2009-06-04 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: How did u mess up? Its AWESOME! *applaudes* that is like the most amazing thing ive ever seen.
2009-06-04 [the wonderfall-man]: if you can do that then you have way too much time on your hands...
2009-06-04 [twitchboy]: hehe..propane


and rednecks is a offensive word from where im from
2009-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ಠ_ಠ ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Is that the guy from King of the Hill?? Here Rednecks isn't Offensive, but Hillbilly is.
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: Lol. I live where redneck and hillbilly are like...national anthems. All hail the south, I guess.
2009-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol YES! ALL HAIL THE SOUTH!
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: I was being Facetious. All hail Germany ... >>
2009-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, well I have something. ALL HAIL ZERO-SAMA!
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: From Code Geass. Eh, I switched teams, actually.
2009-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Lelouch dies... *eats ramen*... and what the F*** have I told you about affixing Japanese suffixes to words?! I'll f***ing kill you!!
2009-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: FUCK OFF YOU BUTT PIRATE!
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: He really does, which is why I love Suzaku...>>
2009-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Suzaku is Lelouch's knight. I HATE SPOILERS!
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: OOps...Misty-chan, you need to get into the world of Manga!! Don't worry, you don't know how, why or even when. Lol. So not much is spoiled cept' like the last scene of one of the last episodes.
2009-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Lelouch is actually a prince!! OMFGROTFLLOLZROTFLMAOICANTHELPBUTWONDERIFYOUVELOSTINTERESTBYNOW!!!!7! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dumbass, I knew that.
2009-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: i am a heron. i haev a long neck and i pick fish out of the water w/ my beak. if you dont repost this comment on 10 other pages i will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: I could probably spoil a lot more...>> But I won't cuz I luffles Misty-Chan <3 *Huggle*
2009-06-05 [†Sweets†]: I'm sorry?
2009-06-05 [Duke Devlin]: Someone loves Misty? D:


A clap of thunder sounds as Duke leaves the room. Clutched tightly in her hand is an extremely mean looking auto-shotgun. Shuddering minutely, she pulled the door closed behind her as she heads out into the pouring rain. What has happened to the world? Is it worth even being here anymore? The precipitation drenches her in seconds, her hair plasters itself to her forehead, while her confused, saddened face turns towards the sky. The lightening is beautiful - powerful, striking, epic - forking across the sky in great arcs. Before the sounding of the next bout of thunder, she raises the gun, and eats the barrel. Gone.
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: You guys are mean.
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]:   

2009-06-05 [Duke Devlin]: HEY! I ain't no meanie! I'm just creatively gifted. ;)
*cough* I am not actually this big-headed, I just liked the phrase. :)
2009-06-05 [the wonderfall-man]: wat just happend?
2009-06-05 [Alexi Ice]: Duke killed herself because I loved Misty chan...>> figurativly of course. Lol.
2009-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats through the cat to get to the ramen*
2009-06-05 [twitchboy]: Holy Crap!!!!! its the end of the world!! *Hides in indiana jone's nuke proof fridge* Hey theres ramen in here!
2009-06-05 [Chimes]: Duke is indeed creatively-gifted though. :P And SHOULD be that big-headed. :)
2009-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]:
卐 vs. ✡
...rematch!!
2009-06-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH FOR PETE'S SAKE!
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Who is this Pete?! ...unless you mean [Pedo pete]...
2009-06-06 [twitchboy]:   
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Naruto sucks!
2009-06-06 [twitchboy]: wow mort....what was that about?
2009-06-06 [RaydensFyre]: *comes in and sits in the corner*


*chews on shoes*
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ya face! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-06 [Alexi Ice]: He is jealous.
2009-06-06 [twitchboy]: mort........your face is so bad i wouldnt grind it up into ramen noodles boil it and feed it to a seagull who would poop it outand and be eat by krill who would eat it and be eaten by a whale just to become whale poo.....jk buddy
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Has anyone really been far even as decided to use even go want to do look more like?
2009-06-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: What? I didn't understand a word you just said Mortified Penguin.
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I think you seem like the kind of person who would question my credibility, forcing me to kill you. Is that true, Misty?
2009-06-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh.... no.
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh! So you're saying I'm not right, huh?!
2009-06-06 [†Sweets†]: wow you guys talk a lot!!
2009-06-06 [the wonderfall-man]: i think someones going to die...
2009-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs*... *kills [the wonderfall-man]*...
2009-06-06 [the wonderfall-man]: *steals Mortified Penguin's ramen*...*comes back as a zombie and eats it*
2009-06-07 [†Sweets†]: PENGUIN!!
2009-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Racist! That's Antarctic-American to you... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-07 [RaydensFyre]: tabasco...
2009-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes.
2009-06-07 [RaydensFyre]: chipotle? habenero? green? regular? *opens trenchcoat*
2009-06-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...
2009-06-07 [Duke Devlin]: This is all wrong! D: You stole his ramen before you came back as a zombie. ;)
2009-06-07 [the wonderfall-man]: i hid a couple of bowls be fore he killed me...
2009-06-07 [Sunrose]: The only cool thing on this page is the robot, the rest is a bunch of ugly lists :P
2009-06-07 [†Sweets†]: Penguin.
2009-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: You called? ...and his name is Mechazawa.
2009-06-08 [†Sweets†]: Penguin!
*folds arms*
2009-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope... no penguins here... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: So I was doin' this chick, right? Then all of a sudden she҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑͡҉҉ ̵̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̿̿̿̚҉҉ ҉ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ͡҉ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ͡҉ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ͡҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑͡҉҉ ̵̡̢̛̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠͇̊̋̌̍̎̏̿̿̿̚҉҉ ҉ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑penis ͡҉ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ͡҉ ҉҉҉҉̡̢̡̢̛̛̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̖̗̘̙̜̝̞̟̠̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑̒̓̔̊̋̌̍̎̏̐̑ ͡҉҉ and it was freakin' crazy, son! ...but, anyway... how was your weekends?
2009-06-08 [Pillowthief]: Youre very right, [Sunrose]. You do know Mort a bit too well to be surprised, I would very well imagine.


*Eats news-paper-colored-breakfast-sandwich*
2009-06-08 [†Sweets†]: *blinks a few times*
2009-06-08 [†Sweets†]: *steals M's ramen and runs*
2009-06-08 [Sunrose]: I'm not surprised no, just optimistic that it might change :P
2009-06-08 [the wonderfall-man]: *triped [†Sweets†] and steals the ramen and eats it* hey mort,you make good ramen...
2009-06-08 [†Sweets†]: *looks up and blinks* ...that penguin will get you, I suggest you run [the wonderfall-man]....
2009-06-08 [Duke Devlin]: Haha abut we'd cry if Bob's Diner were any more informative, or sane. :(
2009-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *a heron flies into the kitchen area and attacks [the wonderfall-man]*
2009-06-08 [†Sweets†]: Devlin!!!! I haven't seen you in forever!!
2009-06-08 [Duke Devlin]: Woah WOAH WOAH!!! *falls back against the door in fear* Whut naow!? My sincerest apologies, I do not recognise you. :O ;)
2009-06-09 [†Sweets†]: *pouts*


That's ok, last time I talked to you was about a year or more ago... I've put on a lot of weight now... I had a baby :D
2009-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I think the kudzu in that picture is eating your/possibly my baby...
2009-06-09 [†Sweets†]: ...what penguin?
2009-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuure... change your picture! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-09 [†Sweets†]: oh, of my son in the ivy?
2009-06-09 [Duke Devlin]: ZOMFG... Same account? By message or what? XD
2009-06-09 [†Sweets†]: I think you were in a different wiki with me... but it might have been a different account, I'll put up a picture you might remember, kk?
2009-06-09 [Duke Devlin]: Sounds good, okies. :)
2009-06-09 [†Sweets†]: it's up now
2009-06-09 [Duke Devlin]: On your page?
2009-06-09 [Duke Devlin]: Does look a little familiar....
2009-06-10 [the wonderfall-man]: wats happening? *still eating mortified penguin's ramen* this is realy good...wats your secret mort?
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Children's tears and anguish... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks* Wow... IT'S A REUNION!
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut your face hole and go add yo'self as a fan!
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why should I?
2009-06-10 [Alexi Ice]: A fan of what?
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: 'Cause I threatened you to?
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: This here wiki!
2009-06-10 [Alexi Ice]: Oh Ok, I get it.
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: You are always mean to me, why would I become a fan of a wiki that's mean to me?
2009-06-10 [Alexi Ice]: Aw! Morties a bad guy! How sad.
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yep
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yet again... 'cause I threatened you to?
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Threaten me all you want, I still won't do it.
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe you don't quite understand... *holds your dog hostage*... Become a fan or... OR... this dog gets it!! ...*shoots Nok*...
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a dog.
2009-06-10 [†Sweets†]: What's doing?
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: He's being a retard.
2009-06-10 [†Sweets†]: lol I'm sorry
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: He always is.
2009-06-10 [†Sweets†]: lol
2009-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm serious.
2009-06-10 [†Sweets†]: i believe you
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, now you don't have a dog... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-10 [†Sweets†]: she never had one :P
2009-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, she's had a dog.
2009-06-10 [Alexi Ice]: What kind of dog?
2009-06-10 [†Sweets†]: an imaginary kind
2009-06-10 [Alexi Ice]: Oh cool! I want one too! Would Morty kill MY puppy??? *Sniffle*
2009-06-10 [Chimes]: Morty? Oh dear.
2009-06-11 [the wonderfall-man]: why would sombody want mort to kill puppys...
2009-06-11 [†Sweets†]: the crazy penguin over there *points and slurps random soup*
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: O.o I am so confused.. LOL, what on earth is this place??
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: It's a state of mind... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: Lmao.. boy, you sure do love to eat ramens.. I have no idea what a ramen is XD
2009-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ramen is a type of soup.
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: Aha i see.
2009-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeppers
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: O.o Is it a nice soup?
2009-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: You can read about it here,


http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ramen
2009-06-11 [†Sweets†]: it's nummy :)
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: Lol.. I shall have to try this soup :D so what exactly is this wiki.. Where do i sign to be a member?
2009-06-11 [†Sweets†]: o.0
member?
2009-06-11 [RaydensFyre]: *snuffles imaginary mustache*  there is a game afoot
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: Oh.. Do the wikis here not have member lists? O.o
2009-06-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: This is where you join, You got served! At Bob's Diner that is!
2009-06-11 [Zombiie Natiion]: ¬_¬ Mort, I am not impressed!
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Mother ******! Did you just call ramen a soup?! *gets a shotgun off the wall*
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Shh! I thought I heard a mustache somewhere...
2009-06-11 [Calico Tiger]: 
2009-06-11 [Chimes]: Thanks Cali... the drink that was in my mouth is no longer in my mouth XD
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]: WTF XD
2009-06-11 [Chimes]: To be fair... We should've expected that. XD
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]: True... True.... D:
2009-06-11 [Calico Tiger]:   
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]:   
2009-06-11 [Chimes]: My sofa liked my drink, by the way :P But it's okay... we have 'temporary' sofas being delivered XD *dances around* *turns into Zombie* *gnaws on Duke*
2009-06-11 [Calico Tiger]:   
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]: :O *becomes a zombeh after death* ^______^ *is a very happeh zombeh* :D *chomps on Cali*
2009-06-11 [Chimes]: *ZOMBIE RAVE*
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]: *dances the macarena* ... NO RAVES! Retro plx.
2009-06-11 [Chimes]: *ZOMBIE DISCO* Better?
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]: YES! :D
2009-06-11 [Chimes]: *bops*
2009-06-11 [Duke Devlin]: *skates*
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: (nothing was ever here)
2009-06-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes.
2009-06-11 [the wonderfall-man]: mort,did you type all of that or paste it...
2009-06-11 [†Sweets†]: oh my holy hell
2009-06-11 [Pillowthief]: I smell a Turkey.
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I smell... uh... the hell?! ...is that gasoline I smell?!
2009-06-11 [†Sweets†]: no. just C4
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, alright... *goes back to sniffing paint thinner*...
2009-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Hmm... *eats ramen*... *rubs head*...
2009-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: That is unhealthy.
2009-06-12 [Chimes]: Mort can't die... so it doesn't matter.
2009-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *dies*
2009-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs uh.. cries*
2009-06-12 [Chimes]: Your dying is a figment of our imagination.
2009-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: (nothing was here)
2009-06-12 [the wonderfall-man]: wat the fricken hell just happend?
2009-06-12 [Pillowthief]: ...Strangely, for once, Im not sure either.
Had to be Misty's fault.
2009-06-12 [Duke Devlin]: Probably right.
2009-06-12 [the wonderfall-man]: it sounded lik mort died but didnt die...thats not possible to die but not die...is it?
2009-06-12 [Duke Devlin]: Sure it is, haven't you ever seen a Zombie movie? ;)
2009-06-12 [the wonderfall-man]: but he isnt a zombie...
2009-06-12 [Duke Devlin]: You don't know that ;)
2009-06-12 [Pillowthief]: Wait, the Re-dead are back?!? I thought we had served them in last years "veggie-burgers"...
2009-06-12 [Pillowthief]: ...Misty, did you actually nominate yourself for Mainstreet?
2009-06-12 [the wonderfall-man]: i can tell that mort is not a zombie cause hes not trying to eat peoples brains or attach anyone here...
2009-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ... *eats people's brains*...
2009-06-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?! I'm on Mainstreet?! *did not know this*
2009-06-13 [†Sweets†]: ...zombie penguin?
2009-06-13 [the wonderfall-man]: still not a zombie cause i eat brains all the time...
2009-06-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh?
2009-06-14 [†Sweets†]: wow
2009-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you, Misty! You killed the conversation we were having! ...now... where was I...? ...*sniffs paint thinner*...
2009-06-14 [†Sweets†]: *eye twitches* who the crap is Misty????????
2009-06-14 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *points* [~Crimson Angel~] ish Misty. ISH MISTY-CHAN!
2009-06-14 [Duke Devlin]: Misty is a terrifying species. It is normally seen irritatingly haunting wiki pages, and generally causing disturbance. On occasion it is seen to be harrassing other innocent members of Elftown - including, but not limited to, the fantastic population of Bob's Diner - with useless comments, spam messages, and it's general presence. Over the years many people have tried to rid a great many wiki pages of this pest, to little avail. It can also display tendencies to suck-up.
2009-06-14 [†Sweets†]: Mist, would you like to join one of my wiki's?
2009-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Like a vacuum! ...*goes back to sniffing paint thinner*...
2009-06-15 [the wonderfall-man]: wat does the paint thinner smell like?
2009-06-15 [Pillowthief]: Oh sh#t! I just mixed up Devlin and Misty!




WHAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!




*wipes tear* Whoo.


Anyways. DEVLIN, did you actually nominate yourself for Mainstreet?
2009-06-15 [Pillowthief]: Anyways, I think I found some of the Missing Diner Comments, but now I can't figure out where I put them.
2009-06-15 [Chimes]: Yes she did... but I also nominated her and so did the other story boss :P
2009-06-15 @Not logged in user@: L
2009-06-15 [the wonderfall-man]: wat the heck is that all about?
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Nothing ever happened, right? Let's keep this between the two of us... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-15 [the wonderfall-man]: ok...
2009-06-15 [†Sweets†]: wow
2009-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?! Missing comments you say?! ...find them! ...or Misty doesn't get it! *doesn't hold a gun to Misty's head*
2009-06-15 [Heatra]: umm....im here [Heatra] has arrived
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... this is good... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's what she said! ...totally...
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Your sister?! Sicko!
2009-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh... yes... *eats ramen*... wait... which one of us am I...?
2009-06-15 [Heatra]: >.>
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Both!... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: o i c... that's weird...
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... *eats Chinese food*...
2009-06-15 [Chimes]: You need more interesting comments.
2009-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Shut your face hole!! ...who's this chimes feller...?
2009-06-15 [Chimes]: Feller? I'm a wench, thank you. :P
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ... *eats slightly radioactive ramen*... There, is that interesting enough for you?
2009-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Wench... feller... same difference...
2009-06-15 [Chimes]: If you exploded... it would be better but I can deal.


Sure, sure... :P
2009-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ... *eats EPIC ramen*... It stimulates the mind...
2009-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Say... isn't that the brand of ramen that killed all those college students...?
2009-06-16 [whitehot]: the brand didnt kill them....it was that they werent worthy
2009-06-16 [the wonderfall-man]: how are they not worthy to eat ramen?
2009-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]: EPIC ramen, my son... *eats FAIL ramen*... *chokes and dies... again*...
2009-06-16 [the wonderfall-man]: how many times have you died mort?
2009-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Over 9000!!
2009-06-16 [the wonderfall-man]: i thought it was around 1,000,000 times...
2009-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: It still could be... last I checked, 1,000,000 was over 9000... and I checked five minutes ago... on wikipedia....
2009-06-16 @Not logged in user@: ... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: With this comment, the average number of comments per day for this friscal year is 9.8075601374570446735395189003436. Now, I don't have to tell you all how bad that is... This means this is B's D's second worst year ever... come on people! Let's start commenting more often!


And for future references, this is comment #2854 of the 08-09 friscal year.
2009-06-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: We've got two and a half months left until the next friscal year! Let's step it up, people!
2009-06-17 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *blinks*
2009-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Thank you for your support, Toshi. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I think you've lost alot of comments because the people that used to comment here when it first was made left elftown for Myspace, or because they don't have the time to get online.
2009-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare you blame Myspace! Myspace did nothing to you... *eats ramen*... *blames Misty instead*...
2009-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: When this first started I probably wasn't even a member and I probably didn't know any of the people that were commenting on here.
2009-06-17 [Thunder Cid]: This is a comment. I repeat this is a comment. That is all.
2009-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: You know out of 131 members I only know 14 of them.
2009-06-17 [Pillowthief]: There. Proof that you don't know everything. I would feel dumb if I didn't just blame Misty.
2009-06-17 [RaydensFyre]: *comments*
2009-06-17 [RaydensFyre]: *comments again*
2009-06-17 [Pillowthief]: *blames Misty for not commenting*
2009-06-17 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO Myspace is so.... Ghey. And old.
Also, *comments several times, but is too magic for any of you to see them*
2009-06-17 [Chimes]: I see them ;)
2009-06-17 [Duke Devlin]: LIES! I was TRICKING you all! >:D Bwahahaha~
2009-06-17 [Chimes]: I didn't mean the comments... I meant... them
2009-06-17 [Duke Devlin]: OH GOD! *shoots self in the foot, then leaps into a burning building, only to dive out of a closed window dramatically* D:
2009-06-17 [Chimes]: Classic movie moment, right there.
2009-06-17 @Not logged in user@: *eats ramen* Riiiiiiight
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...eh! Comment some more, people! ... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sets opossum traps in the oven*... *waits for dinner*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ... *starts renovating the diner*... *counts how many bathrooms there truly are in Bob's Diner*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Last I counted it was... over 9000!!
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Sh*t! ...9000... and 1!
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: No such thing! STFU!! ...*punches Misty*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! ... *knocks over an inconspicuous ant farm*... *and punches misty*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: MY ANTS!! ...and uncles... what have you done?! ...*ants swarm Misty*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: They deserved it! Eh, no clever word play! ... *ants slowly devour misty*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Thanks, ants... thants. ...*ants start to dissolve Misty's skeletal system with their "ant-acids"!*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Too corny, man... *the ants begin to mutate from the misty juices*... *goes behind counter and pulls out a shotgun*... Bring it!
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh no! Now the ants are eating Nok!


Ants eat Nok.


Ants evolve to level 5.


Ants obtain sentience level 6.
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Not good! Get some ant repellent! ... *eats ramen at a time like this*... *the pride of lions bursts in*... Sh*t!
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh f*rk! *an epic battle ensues*... *the gang of chickens burst in as well*... holy crap!! This is so interesti- oh, hey... are those cookies...?! ...*turns away and wanders over to the trash can*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: EPIC battle! Five bucks on the lions! ... *a massive tornado rips apart the diner*... R*pti! 
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *a tyrannosaurus bursts in through the ceiling*... OMG!! HOLY D*LFO SH*FK!!! ..........THESE ARE COOKIES!! ...*eats the strange brown lumps of stuff in the trash can*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: WHY?! ... *B-52s start dropping nukes all over the place*... DEAR MOTHER OF JESUS, WHY?! DE*TYHG!!! ... *eats fully radioactive ramen*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws a dart at the dartboard in the corner*... *misses horribly*... *the dart somehow takes down a B-52, which violently crashes into bathroom 1,337*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Not bathroom 1,337!! That was the one with all the ramen!!!... *eats Chinese food*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *destruction happens everywhere*... *people sob in sorrow*... *scratches lower torso*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *Timmy, the gentle leviathan, is crushed by the explosions*... TIMMY!!! NO!!! ... *eats scorched Timmy remains*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*eats barbecued Timmy thigh*...
2009-06-18 [Duke Devlin]: Pretty epic film you got going on there...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ......film...? ...*eats more Timmy*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *another catastrophic explosion desecrates Santa's workshop*... SANTA!!! Now there won't be a Christmas this year! FR**ijy!!
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Holy YU*3J!! You're right! ...*steals presents from the charred remains of the building*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs toys*... Poor children of the world! ... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *grabs an XBOX 720*... hmm... I didn't know the elves had the legal right to produce these...
2009-06-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wow you guys seriously must not have anything better to do.
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: If it's magical Christmas elves, then it's possible.  Nukes?  Yup.  Cloaking technology?  Perhaps.  Death Notes?  You bet your sweet bippy they make them... *eats destroyed bathroom #1,337 ramen*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Seems like the government should be alerted to these elves' activities...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: They're working for the government, man.  How do you think Santa gets away with murder so easily?
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: OH SK*P7!! ...darn that Santa... killed my grandpa!
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, he'll do that... *punches misty remains*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kicks Misty ashes*
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Why are we so hypocritically abusive?... *drop-kicks misty particles*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: What does this have to do with hippo grits...? ...*stomps Misty gluons*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know, man... *shoots misty quarks*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Riiight... *stabs misty antiparticles*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeeeees... *shanks misty dark matter*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: OMG!! *misty turns into a black hole*
2009-06-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... I'm not dead you morons that have nothing better to do because you have no lives at all and are single.
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: You keep thinking that... *eats ramen*... *punches the black hole that is misty and the misty reincarnate*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hurls the living misty into the black hole misty, creating a series of mind-blowing explosions*
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *time rips itself apart as the calamity ensues, thus creating a black void of nothingness*... *Bob's Diner still exists, though*... *kind of irritating, when you think about it*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...uh... yeah... *punches misty*...
2009-06-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever you freaks.
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ... *east ramen*... *it's a town in New Jersey, look it up!*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *west ramen!*
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: WD*TRE! *north ramen, son!*
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: So, yous guys... what are your thoughts on the current economic situation...? ...*eats dignity*...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: F*rp the economy.  Worry about the missiles in North Korea... *eats pride*...
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: North Korea can't do sh*rt! Kim is a little puss!
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: That might be true, but his son might not be!
2009-06-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh, like that lil' fag's gonna do anything...
2009-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Possibly!
2009-06-18 [CrystalBlaze]: hello all
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it! Everyone add themselves as fans again... stupid Elftown... always messing with me... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: Add yourself, stupid...
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! ... *eats war-torn ramen*...
2009-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: The cake was a lie, man...
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: No it wasn't!
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes it was! ...*eats pie instead*...
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO!
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: YES! *hides cake*
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO IT WASN'T! *tackles*
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *stabs you with a cross in the face*... IT FREAKIN' WAS!!
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO IT WASN'T! *wipes away the blood as I heal*
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: What are you talking about...? ...*eats cake*...
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: The cake wasn't a lie.
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, well you were adopted!
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was?! YAY! I KNEW IT!
2009-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: At least, that's the only possible explanation... *eats more frickin' ramen/cake*...
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-06-19 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm sure her parents wish so too...
2009-06-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, if I was adopted I would be happy, my dad is like a freaking warden!
2009-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid Obama with his idiotic health care plans... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: My spoon is too big!
2009-06-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs because your spoon is Too big*
2009-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh... yes. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2009-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: No.
2009-06-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?
2009-06-20 [†Sweets†]: yes
2009-06-21 [hammersmashface]: ziggie'dee do da penguin
2009-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: wat u say?!
2009-06-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Maybe Temple of the burning heart was using baby talk towards you hun.
2009-06-21 [RaydensFyre]: damn...not even this place is cheering me up tonight
2009-06-21 [†Sweets†]: yes
2009-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not Bob's Diner's job! ...in fact, we're here to make you feel worse! *spits on RaydensFyre*
2009-06-21 [†Sweets†]: yes
2009-06-21 [Duke Devlin]: Misty. You are actually retarded.
2009-06-22 [†Sweets†]: no
2009-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I can't help but notice that only girls come to Bob's Diner... except the occasional feller...
2009-06-22 [Sunrose]: It must be because you're so charming and handsome :P
2009-06-22 [†Sweets†]: no
2009-06-22 [Sunrose]: Liar :P
2009-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, that certainly makes sense... *suavely eats ramen*...
2009-06-23 [†Sweets†]: no
2009-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm going to kill you, [†Sweets†]... *eats ramen*... *gets shotgun of the gun rack*...
2009-06-23 [†Sweets†]: yes
2009-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *aims gun*
2009-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Touch her and die you penguin loving freak!
2009-06-24 [Paul Doyle]: Never underestimate the power of penguins.
2009-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *touches her cyber bewbs*... HONK HONK!
2009-06-24 [the wonderfall-man]: wats been happening?
2009-06-24 [†Sweets†]: I like penguins :(
2009-06-24 [Alexi Ice]: Penguins are the shiz. but killing is not cool.
2009-06-24 [the wonderfall-man]: the power of the penguins is stronger then anything...
2009-06-24 [Alexi Ice]: ....*Yawn*....
2009-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Wake up! *splashes searing coffee in your eyes*
2009-06-24 [Alexi Ice]: Ouch. I can't help that this place is boring. Lol.
2009-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Wut?! Your face is boring! ...well... not that boring... since I threw boiling coffee on it... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-24 [Alexi Ice]: So now I have interesting scars. Woot.
2009-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: And a bruise! *tries to punch you*... *hits Misty instead*...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: HEY! *jumps in front of misty* That's my misty!!!
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, I don't think anyone else is claiming it... I guess you can have it... *eats ramen*... it's not housebroken though... just so you know.
2009-06-25 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *glomps* MY MISTY!
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... I reckon we got a sitiation here now... to decide who gets it, you must both chug a gallon of bleach. Whoever is left alive or most lucid shall receive the "prize". Now... chug! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, entertain me! ...*eats ramen with a pinky up*...


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ಠ_ರೃ
2009-06-25 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: :((( but.....but....i donts WANNNNAAA. :( I say she ish my Misty so she ish my Misty. *huggles* :-P
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: DO IT!! *injects Toshi with bleach*
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: I totally think we should let her decide.
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: You're just trying to get out of bleach chugging... wimp!
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: nope nope. what if who she doesn't want to win does? should so totally be her choice.
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: It doesn't get a choice! It will abide by the rules of the chug-off or it will be forcefully hurled into the dumpster! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: so, if toshi refuses and I don't, I win?
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, why not... *eats ramen*... *watches from above*...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: crap
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *suddenly loses interest*... *plants C4 around the diner*...
2009-06-25 [Paul Doyle]: *sends in a few Cuban guerilla squads from "Mafia Wars: Cuba"*
2009-06-25 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: O.o But....But.....hhmmmmmmmm FINE You can have Misty....But I claim Akane! *huggles*
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: ok!
2009-06-25 [the wonderfall-man]: that was weird...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: so not
2009-06-25 [the wonderfall-man]: is too...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: not
2009-06-25 [the wonderfall-man]: is
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: prove it.
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *proves it with a serious of complex mathematical equations*... There. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [the wonderfall-man]: see,he proved it for me...
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh wait! ...I forgot to carry the one! ...dang it... nevermind... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: oh btw!
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]:   
2009-06-25 [Pillowthief]: Do I have to start wearing protection?
Its kinda dangerous to get a double dose of anything in Bob's, but a double dose OF Bob's might be too much...
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: If the iframe inside of that iframe would work, it could have been a triple dose... but noooo... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Holy sh*t! M.J. croaked!
2009-06-25 [Alexi Ice]: HOW?
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Heart attack? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [†Sweets†]: what the hell happened?!
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, that's right... Michael Jordan has died. Goodnight, sweet prince...
2009-06-25 [RaydensFyre]: apparently he was found at his house not breathing and died at the hospital.......the rumor i heard is heart attack.....oh and farrah fawcet died too
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody cares about Farrah... she was dying anyway...
2009-06-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: It was Michael Jackson you moron, and he died of cardiac arrest, and to Toshi and Dreamer, you can share me if you want, I have enough love for everyone!
2009-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I know it was Michael Jordan... I just said that... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-25 [Chimes]: ;)
2009-06-26 [the wonderfall-man]: i think it was a heart attach by drugs...
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: mist, toshi gave up on you, you're all mine now ^^
2009-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well alright then, I don't mind. *glomps Dreamer*
2009-06-26 [whitehot]: micheal jackson died...i killed him
2009-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: No you didn't, and it's not good to make fun of the dead you know.
2009-06-26 [whitehot]: on accident of course
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: Uh huh.
I agree with misty.
2009-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Thank you! *smiles*
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: I sent you the reason why.
2009-06-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok.
2009-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! *spits on people's graves*... take that, Carradine!
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: o.0
2009-06-26 [Alexi Ice]: *Reading a book about Zombies and imagining them eating mort* LOL.
2009-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...uh huh... *idly rubs crotch*... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-26 [Alexi Ice]: ? Huh?
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: Augh! I just saw you over there! *points*
2009-06-26 [Alexi Ice]: To where?
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: over there! *wiggles finger* at the barbie place!!
2009-06-26 [Alexi Ice]: Oh, I remeber *Not ecactly paying attention* sorry. I'm in the middle of writing a story ^^ I'm wrapped up in my own world.
2009-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah?! I'm wrapped up in tinfoil... it quiets the voices.
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: writing helps
2009-06-26 [Alexi Ice]: Yep ^^ It certinally does.
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: I'm writing too. what's yours about?
2009-06-26 [the wonderfall-man]: wat just happend?
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: eh?
2009-06-26 [the wonderfall-man]: never mind...
2009-06-26 [†Sweets†]: ok
2009-06-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the?
2009-06-27 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: farrah fawcet died and went to heaven. God gave her one wished. She wished all the children of the world were safe. 3 hours later MJ was dead...


Sorrryyyyyy it was a fwd text i got and it was too funny. *giggles* altho i do kinda admire MJ for his music. RIP THE GOD OF POP!
2009-06-27 [the wonderfall-man]: wen you put RIP do you mean Rest In Peace or Rock In Peace?
2009-06-27 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: Rock in Peace baby! \m/ (>.<) \m/
2009-06-27 [the wonderfall-man]: Rock In Peace is a realy good song...have you herd of it?
2009-06-27 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: no......
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: My dad told me that text.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: As ten thousand maniacs emerge form an oasis that’s everclear
My soundgarden was invented to blind melons and smash pumpkins
How could a whole nation of crash test dummies hope to release the grapes
of wrath
On the day of Sabbath knowing it’ll be black
Especially when they might be giants and they take to the air with stone
temple pilots
I’m in a parachute club with the motley crew
My b-52, fires nine inch nails
Radiohead, I cause phonetic quiet riots
My tragically hip fight with the spirit of the west
Society’s no fucking use to where white zombies have nofx
Now cowboys are turning into junkies
Hanging themselves with lasso’s, singing blues about rodeo’s that once
stood true
Have no time to fight with those fools
Alice’s in chains and cold hearted iron maidens claim the have the ministry
of sound for U2
While everyone’s raging against the machines
Their watching us on satellites form Georgia
But there’s more in my set than Atlantis and it won’t crash into Vegas
cause my man smith has the arrow
The moral to this peril is Hades have no fury and mc’s scorn
And I would continue this verse but nothing rhymes with orange!!
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: Eh, spamming may be fine here, but everywhere else it will get you into trouble.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: your here too?!*tilits head* im still here if you wanna talk
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: Sure. Send me a message, I'm everywhere. You'll notice it eventually.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: one more spam and im done read it


Im ignoring all the dumb shit
Yo, because nothing is coming from it
Im not gonna waste no time fuckin around my gat straight humming
Hummin, coming at ya
Yeah ya know I had to gatt ya
Time for some action
Just a fraction of friction
I got the clearance
To run the interference
Into your satellite
Shining a battle light
Sen got the gatt and I know that hell gatt you right
Heres an example
Just a little sample
How I could just kill a man
One-time tried to come in my home
Take my chrome
I said, yo, its on!
Take cover son or youre assed-out
How do you like my chrome then I watched the rookie pass out
Didnt have to blast him but I did anyway
That young punk had to pay
So I just killed a man
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wow, that is, odd.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: yeah
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: Lol. Nice. Hopefully not a truthful rant, but pretty cool regardless. I don't think Mort cares if you spam the place but if your a guy, your stealing his thunder. LOL.
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, you are.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: no i aint, imjust doing my thing, wich is the lighting, not the thunder
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs* Oh really?
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: this is every fat mans love poem to a peice of food




Everyday i think of you,
You're on my mind.
Some things in the past
Are better left behind.
Every night i dream of you,
The images as clear as day.




cheesebugers are my only love, i love you
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: *lights a smoke* imma go geta boot mickey and see what happends form there
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh... alrighty then.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: Hordes of faces
Empty eyes
I see nothing new
Seasoned schemes of slimy curs
Offer up their flu
Am I beast or
Am I human
Am I just like you
Power seething
Really reeling
Reaching out for you
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: that was to my cakes
2009-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Sitting on a cornflake, waiting for the van to come... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh my goodness! That is the crazy thing I've ever heard, Hi Mort. *waves at Mortified Penguin only to have my hand fall off and run away* DAMN IT! *chases*
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: *pops everyone*
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: Hmm..how idle.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: whatare you talking about this time woman?!
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: Woman? ...*Steals Mort's shotgun and shots you* I'm a femanist. PLEASE don't call me that. Ever.
2009-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *fires randomly with a machine gun*... Ah, Saturdays... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: *Gets Shot and starts sampeling my own blood* Tasty. Thanks ^^
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: *gets up holding my chest and shoots Akane in the foot with a handgun* there ya go talk about that
2009-06-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh dear!
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: *Ignores last shot and continues licking own arm* Hmmm...the only boy allowed under my skin is Darren, sorry ^^ Getting shot doesn't bother someone like me.
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: *glares at you*You..auh, bastin that turkey today?
2009-06-28 [the wonderfall-man]: this is a good song to me...


Let there be sound,there was sound
let there be light,there was light
let there be drum there was drums!
thet there be guitar there was GUITAR!!!
oh let there be rock!
2009-06-28 Armchair: 82byiq Armchair sightseeing, with links to many famous places and landmarks
2009-06-28 Armchair: ofYhQM Armchair sightseeing, with links to many famous places and landmarks
2009-06-28 [Alexi Ice]: I don't even know the turkey.
2009-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: You people are weirdos! ...*eats ramen*... *swats at invisible moths again*...
2009-06-28 [Mind Fucker]: i thinks its time to take the temprature, see if the meat's just right*tackles akane onto one ton of feather*
2009-06-28 [the wonderfall-man]: why do people change there name on here?
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Why does pi equal 3.14...etc? Because it just does. 
2009-06-29 [the wonderfall-man]: lol
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: well its a nice day overhere, what did you do yesterday? me i smoked my mind away, i was gonna drink but im gladi didnt today becausei feel like crap, and i am still wondering why my mom hates me
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Crazy day, yous guys. Earlier, I accidentally a whole bottle of coke! ...it was messed up, man... *eats ramen*...
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: i feelfat
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Why did you just role me in feathers?
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, fatso! *throws rocks at you*
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: At me or at the guy who thinks he is faT?
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: All three!


https://www.sprintip.com/index.jsp
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: i miss my kitty, she was my world, and i threw her out of my life...*breaks down*
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah! Break it down! ...*watches as [Mind Fucker] dances*... so where'd you throw her to? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-29 [the wonderfall-man]: dumpster...now its a dumpster-cat...
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Three?
2009-06-29 [Duke Devlin]: Y'all are fags. :)
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, that's just rude... I hope you die. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: i eat cats for dinn dinn
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Chinese food? ...I never really did care for food of oriental origins... *eats ramen loudly*...
2009-06-29 [Pillowthief]: I like you Mind.


You remind me of a Slinky.


Useless, but hilarious when pushed down stairs.
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: you welding over there?
2009-06-29 [the wonderfall-man]: how are we fags? that makes no sence...
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: And, like a slinky, if you fail to fall all the way down the stairs, I will become frustrated and mangle you.
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: I'm a girl, so tha'ts kind of impossible.
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: i like girls
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: I do too....HAHAHA! (Even though I kinda have a boyfriend)
2009-06-29 [Duke Devlin]: I know, [the wonderfall-man]. However, as far as I am aware, very little makes 'sence'. Though... Really, a lot of things make 'sense'. Is that what you were going for?
And really, the comment was just to spark conversation - evidently it worked, to a small degree.
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: who are you talking about,i kinda think your full of shit but man thats ......i need to sit down...
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Heya Dukie!!!
 Mind..person...I never know who you are talking too.
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: im talking to the Dukie
2009-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Why is Duke full of shit?
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: We're at an average of 10.9 comments a day for this year. If we can get in 14 more comments today, it'll raise it to 11!! Only 61 days left in this friscal year! ...I know, right??!!! ...*eats ramen*... *rocks back and forth*...
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Every time I close my eyes, all I see is an old, fat man taking a piss... And each time, he's come a little closer. I just know that, very soon, he'll be close enough to piss on my shoes. When that day comes, I WILL kill my children.
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: oh
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: for
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: he
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: is
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: the
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: highest
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: so
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: sayith
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: the
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: lord
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: of
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: beathose
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: who wants
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: a
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: cream
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: pie
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: That'll do, pig. For the last ten days, we've averaged over 20 comments a day! ..........what do you have to say for yourselves?! ...that's not many comments at all! I should start taking hostages!! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-06-29 [Mind Fucker]: *bends you over and readies a pine apple*
2009-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! That's a perfectly good pineapple! ...don't you dare!
2009-06-30 [the wonderfall-man]: no, use this one... *grabs a realy sharp and thick pineapple* it'll feel weirder...
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: ...So Mind likes ass rape? Ew...
2009-06-30 [the wonderfall-man]: hes going to shove it up Mort's ass...not his own...
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: It's still ass rape no matter how you look at it.
2009-06-30 [the wonderfall-man]: but with a big pineapple...it sounds realy painful...so im staying away from Mind Fucker...
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: I think I shall follow the leader and do that as well.
2009-06-30 [Mind Fucker]: hey why stay away, imnot gonna hurt you
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: Back-tracking - [Mind Fucker] --- Like shit are you allowed to address me as Dukie. You have not earned the right, and I do not appreciate a nickname from someone that I do not know, at all. In future please use my full username, as if I had wanted to be addressed as 'Dukie', I would have change my username to that.


But moving on, thank you, Akane. :) <3 Good day to you.



2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: HAHAHA <3 Sorry! I mean no harm by it, I just think it's cute ^^ If you don't want me to call you that anymore, I wont. Hehehe.
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: NO NO NO!!! That was addressed at [Mind Fucker]. :) You can do that all you like. ^^
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: *Feels Special* Awww! *GLOMP* Now I want to be your friend!!!
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: XD LMAO
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: ...Lol...^^' Sorry...I'm WAY hyper today.
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: Enjoy~ XD
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: *Prances around in the darkness* Soooooooooooo...whatcha up too?
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: Just rps atm. Going out later. :O
2009-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: Wow...I wonder where you live. Here it's 3 in the morning..
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO XD It's 09:34 here. :) I live in England. :)
2009-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey dookie, I mean, dukie. What up?
2009-06-30 [the wonderfall-man]: im bored...whats everyone doing?
2009-06-30 [Duke Devlin]: Lmao. You are certainly hilarious, Mort. ;)
2009-07-01 [CrystalBlaze]: hey all I'm back
2009-07-01 [the wonderfall-man]: hey...
2009-07-01 [Alexi Ice]: Nothing....
2009-07-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Today's the day saith my horse, the day to kick the pail in the face of Asland.
2009-07-01 [the wonderfall-man]: wat?
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Twas the time to kill the cat, but he was already dead saith the rat!
2009-07-02 [twitchboy]: penis muffins!!!!! anyways hello guys!
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello said the talking dog to the purple frog.
2009-07-02 [RaydensFyre]: was the dog talking to the frog on the log? the one in the bog? i know the cat and the rat....in that strange lady's flat..........
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah yes my dear the dog was talking to the frog on the log that was in the bog, and he also visited the cat and the rat in the strange lady's flat.
2009-07-02 [RaydensFyre]: that strange lady that lives in the flat? she drives me bats! she never washes her dishes...and the garbage can she misses! she peed on her knee...and talks to a pet flea....and sits around and gets fat!
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah yes, she does get fat, eating burgers, doughnut, ice cream, and things like that. She's never been married, did you know that?
2009-07-02 [RaydensFyre]: never been married? what an amazing thing.....never worn a wedding ring? I worry for her sanity...talking to that flea...who said that made a good pet? beats me....
2009-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Those rhymes are quite awful, I hope you all know. I do so detest them and yes, they do blow.
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: I worry too, I see her sometimes black and blue, I wonder why, and I wonder who.
2009-07-02 [RaydensFyre]: i heard she was interested in a guy, thought he was a regular joe, I told her that wasnt gonna fly...that guy...he sucks shit up his nose
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Are you serious, she must be delirious. That crazy old hag, she stole my bag.
2009-07-02 [RaydensFyre]: which bag? i dont think it was the hag however....it was the loon on the corner..smoking the fag...yes, this i remember he has a thing for a nice bag....a little off you would say..uses them to tote the odd bondage mag...and prance around chocolate shops all day
2009-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: hmmmmmm you don't say, he does this every day, I have nothing left to say, and no money to pay.
2009-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2009-07-02 [twitchboy]: this rhyme is a trap, soon someone will say orange so i will shut my flap, before i rhyme into a corner like an ilegible foreigner, that is all i have to say i will say no more, on your way out plaese shut the door.
2009-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *rips off the door and beats twitchboy savagely with it*... also, orange, purple, silver, month. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Is it your time of the month Mort, or are you angery about being short?
2009-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*picks nose*... dude I'm a 7"4' male from Kenya... what are you talking about...? ...*eats ramen*... *runs in the olympics*...
2009-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well hows about a nice flower for the man? *hands you a daisy and spins away*
2009-07-03 [RaydensFyre]: well at least we dont have to wonder too long about the identity of the man that likes swiping purses and dancing in candy shops
2009-07-03 [Araglas]: ...*wanders in dressed in bright colors and sucking a lolypop and holing a purse* Hey guys!!
2009-07-03 [RaydensFyre]: *runs screaming and smashes face first into a wall*
2009-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH! It's my dear friend Araglas. *runs up to him hugging him and handing him a blue rose*
2009-07-03 [Alexi Ice]: Heya Araglas!
2009-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands Mitsu a yellow rose*
2009-07-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *stares at everyone creepily*... *slowly peels a potato*...
2009-07-04 [Chimes]: O.o
2009-07-04 [Alexi Ice]: Oh...thank you? (Yellow rose means friendship) I learned that a long time ago...
2009-07-04 [Pillowthief]: Are you going to make mashed potatoes Mort? ... *slowly peals the skin off of Minds face* ...
2009-07-04 [Pillowthief]: Guess what? I actually found some of the Missing Comments! Not all of them, they're tricky to track down.
2009-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Great work! ...well... somewhat great... here you go:


  

2009-07-05 [Alexi Ice]: Congradulations?
2009-07-06 [twitchboy]: *picks chair peices from face, then shoves them under morts fingernails* to bad my name is twitchboy bolt... *running backwards and beats mort in olympics*
2009-07-06 [Duke Devlin]: I really hate how hard some people try to be random. =/ It's sad. :(
2009-07-06 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: :(......hmmm....*evil grin* *runs around poking random people* HI!!!
2009-07-06 [Alexi Ice]: Hi TOSHI-CHAN <3 !!!
2009-07-06 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *dances* YAY! ^.^ <33333333
2009-07-07 [twitchboy]: Duke....were u meaning me?
2009-07-07 [Duke Devlin]: LOL No. I thought you might think that, but I couldn't be bothered to write that I didn't. Nah, I meant someone way back up there somewhere. *waves towards older comments*
2009-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm guessing she meant Misty... like usual... *eats ramen*...
2009-07-07 [Duke Devlin]: No, I didn't actually.
2009-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh lawd! Must be Rayden then!
2009-07-07 [Duke Devlin]: Think it might have been. Don't really remember. XD
2009-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Is it difficult to be random?
2009-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Very much so... It requires intense physical and mental stamina.
2009-07-07 [Paul Doyle]: You didn't ask for it but here it is anyway since Bob's Diner is linked there . . . and Mort temporarily ran of out of questions.


Ask Pauly the Anthro-Dragon!



It's kind of like "Dear Abby" from hell. Ask away!
2009-07-07 [pixish]: Why isn't everyone using the new and improved chat? All you have to do is click! (and make sure you have the right java version or something I guess)


http://www.elftown.com/_IRC
2009-07-07 [pixish]: Also, the latest version of the Herald is available for download. 
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: I'M BACK GUYS!!!!!*turns into a super cute puppy*
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: *kicks puppy*
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: *curls up in the corner* why would you do such a thing to a*sniffle* baby*snif sniff* puppy*faints*
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: Sorry that doesn't work on me. *pulls out flamethrower*
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: *looks at you with cute face while a tear rolls down my cheek* c'mon
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: BURN! *fries puppy*
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: *explodes sending needles out into every directiom*
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: Oh shi- *falls over covered in needles*
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: *appears in a puff of smoke* whats wrong ol boy? you hurt *bends over to look at you*
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: *spits a needle*
2009-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO! *gets a strecher and put Cid on it and wheels him away to a room to have the needles removed*
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: My comment
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: *poof...gone*
2009-07-08 [The green Bastard]: *lays on the floor face down*
2009-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh well, looks at tie pei, HI! *waves*
2009-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I knew crossbreeding puppies and needles was a bad idea... *crossbreeds cats and anthrax instead*...
2009-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH MY!
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: Attention! All role player who need assistance go to The Role Playing Network!
2009-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm good... as you can clearly see by The Best Of Bob: Volume 1!
2009-07-08 [Thunder Cid]: Eh, I'm just throwing the word out.
2009-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah?! Well, I'm throwing Misty out! *hurls [~Crimson Angel~] into the streets*
2009-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *comes back in dusting myself off* It's not nice to throw a crazy person in the streets.
2009-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry... *throws [~Crimson Angel~] into the dumpster instead*...
2009-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Much better!
2009-07-08 [Duke Devlin]: Pixish... We are aware that they new Herald is available. oO And people find it easier to keep chat HERE, rather than using the 'new' chat system.
2009-07-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, I agree with the Duke.
2009-07-08 [Duke Devlin]: Danke, Misty. :)
2009-07-08 [Pillowthief]: Totally agree...   


That you all shall die!
*Burns down Bob's Diner*




....(Again)
2009-07-08 [Duke Devlin]: I'm sure you just burnt down a burned-out husk of a building. oO
2009-07-08 [Pillowthief]: Ahaha... surely you jest.


Wait. Maybe not. Did no one rebuild from the last time Bob's burned down?
2009-07-08 [Duke Devlin]: No, I don't think they did. :O We never do... Maybe we should make it a project. :D *overenthusiastic jumping*
2009-07-08 viagra ilman reseptiä: j5NVmF biduwpdx rgmxocgo seijvlla
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... yes... *eats ramen*...
2009-07-09 @Not logged in user@: Michael Jackson is dead, in honor of him let's all grab our crotch and do the moonwalk!
2009-07-09 [twitchboy]: A little to the left, now to the right...Good now drop it! *Motioning to a helicopter carrying a massive crate**Opens it up* Its a new diner complete with bar, tables, kitchen, wifi, pool, pool tables, darts, ky jelly pit, massive screen tv in HD, poker tables, dog fighting areana, mma areana, waterpark, indoor walmart, gym, pool full of beer, and upstairs brothel
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Nice! ...*starts pouring some gasoline on everything*...
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: can i join?
2009-07-09 [Thunder Cid]: Oh no he didn't!
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: i could work in the brothle lol
2009-07-09 [Thunder Cid]: You don't ask to join! You just DO IT! *throws a credit card*
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: *explodes sending chocolate needles and cookies everywhere* hamburgers should be higher
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ky jelly pit...? WHAT THE FUCK?!
2009-07-09 [Thunder Cid]: Why the fuck is exploding when I hit them with something. And why the fuck is it always needles! *falls...poof...gone*
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: you dont need to finish what hasnt already be-...look at that hmmmmm......*there is a half naked anime girl putting some hamburgers on a shelf* that there is what is important
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: *looks at the girl* You can do it......
2009-07-09 [Alexi Ice]: ?
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: i got a new pic up wanna see me?
2009-07-09 [Alexi Ice]: Someone might. Lol.
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: What on earth?!
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: look at me in my pics, i am who i am
2009-07-09 [twitchboy]: u guys like?
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: im a girl you stupid fuck*slaps twitch boy and storms out of the wiki* Fuckhead!
2009-07-09 [Alexi Ice]: What?
2009-07-09 [twitchboy]: i was talking about the new diner
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: *poofs back* sorry man i havnt had a smoke today*gives you some sausages for your tea*
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... Me and Mitsu are girls too.
2009-07-09 [Alexi Ice]: What new diner, Twitch. ?
2009-07-09 [twitchboy]: look at the past messages
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: *kisses twichboy on the cheek* im sorry man
2009-07-09 [twitchboy]: ok then
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: *looks at you* whats the matter this time ?
2009-07-09 [Alexi Ice]: The Slave Trade - Come one, come all!
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *can obviously tell that [The green Bastard] is [sunabozu]*... *eats ramen*... *swims in the KY Jelly Pit*...
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH THE IMAGE OF MORTIFIED PENGUIN SWIMMING IN KY JELLY IS SO DISTURBING...Actually the idea of anyone swimming in Ky Jelly is, but still! *runs around screaming till I trip and hit my head on the floor knocking myself out*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Excellent. My plan went perfectly... *eats victory ramen!*...
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *swats at invisible moths yet again*... That tears it! ...*buys invisible bug spray*... it may have cost $599.99, but it was worth it!
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *twitches on the cold hard floor*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *sprays invisible bug spray in Misty's face*... wait... this isn't bug spray... it's... it's... spray paint! ...*shrugs*... *keeps spraying*...
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets high*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *sprays directly into the nostrils*
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *coughs paint up and roundhouse kicks you*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *Chuck Norris bursts in and unsurgically removes your kidneys*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of beans, I saw this kid today that was trying to convince his friend to go down a water slide. He told him, "Don't worry! You can only die once!"... best motivational speaker ever... *eats ramen*...
2009-07-09 [Thunder Cid]: That's pretty epic.
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have no kidneys to steal, because I am the living dead, and plus the cookie monster already stole them.
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *is out of spray paint*... darn... *purchases more from a shifty street vendor*... yes! ...*continues pointlessly spraying into the air*...
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sprays Axe body spray in Mortified Penguins direction*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]:
[Mortified Penguin] dodges the attack!
[Mortified Penguin] uses B.O.! It's super effective!
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Whatever!
2009-07-09 [Thunder Cid]: [Mortified Penguin] Use tackle attack!
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up and get in the pokeball, Snorlax! ...*proceeds to throw pokeballs at Misty's head*...
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY! I'm not Snorlax! I'm Jiggley Puff!
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't give me no lip, boy! ...Pikachu! Use Groin Punch!
2009-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not a boy or a pikachu.
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: That's all we needed to hear. *the FBI comes out from behind the trees and begins arresting Misty*... *they use unnecessarily extreme prejudice*...
2009-07-09 [Mrs. No_One]: FBI? You mean the Fine Body Investigaters?
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: Please..Please close your legs
2009-07-09 cialis myynti: 62gBz4 xgjuigxn znyxwfwi aizmkjcm
2009-07-09 köp viagra: HSoXER fkijxabx cislljcs dqjkxuqf
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: That thing's getting annoying... *eats ramen*...
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: what is
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: The fairly obvious thing above my last comment...
2009-07-09 [The green Bastard]: what am i cockblocking you*steps out of the way*
2009-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Directly above the second to last comment of mine. The ones starting with "köp viagra" and "cialis myynti"......
2009-07-09 [CrystalBlaze]: u all be crazy
2009-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2009-07-10 [twitchboy]: shakalaka he ho! whats up?
2009-07-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: TWITCHY BOY! *glompage*
2009-07-10 [twitchboy]: whats up Bara?
2009-07-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nothing, I'm just chillin.... in the freezer!
2009-07-10 [Alexi Ice]: I have a life sized freezer. It's amazing.
2009-07-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Awesome!
2009-07-10 [Mrs. No_One]: Why'd the green bastard tell me to close my legs, I'm wearing jeans.
2009-07-10 [Chimes]: Because you sounded like you would be the type who opens them easily, I'd imagine.
2009-07-10 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO It's true, I'm afraid. That's what you get for having the a username with 'sexy' in it. Especially when it's followed by 'schoolgirl'. >_> Loser.
2009-07-10 [twitchboy]: well.....that is very alluring
2009-07-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: So is your mom! *snap*
2009-07-10 [twitchboy]: yo mama is so skanky we have to pour salt water down her pants to keep the crabs fresh
2009-07-10 [Mrs. No_One]: I didn't pick this name, my friend did.
2009-07-10 [Duke Devlin]: You can change it, genius. ;)
2009-07-10 @Not logged in user@: DOOKIE! HAHAHA!
2009-07-10 @Not logged in user@: *eats ramen* Indeed
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... how strange...
2009-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...oh lawdy loo! ...*the gang of chickens burst in and shiv Misty repeatedly*...
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why am I being shived?
2009-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's none of my concern...
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... alrighty then.
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: i love you guys*sniffle*
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love you too...
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: *kisses Ame*
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blushes* Woah!
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: *hugs you* I just really love you right nowyour like...awesome i *rubs on youabit*
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blushes more* ...
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: *brings my lips up the side of your neck and then nibbles one your ear*
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *turns crimson* Hey uh...
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: *licks the back of your earlobe*
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blushes* Wh-what are you doing?
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: apple
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: *wided eyed* Excuse me miss but that is private. *blushes*
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: ape
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey! *pulls your hand from the inside of the mayo* That's unhealthy for you, the Mayo is gross! XD
2009-07-11 [The green Bastard]: sorry
2009-07-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Look at what I changed my comment too. XD
2009-07-11 [Alexi Ice]: ....What the fuck. This isn't porno central. Bob's diner has SOME class...(What am I saying?)
2009-07-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: It isn't? *hides stack of porn*
2009-07-12 [The green Bastard]: HAHAHAHAHAH! hypocrocy is funny!
2009-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: No, you're a hippo-crat!
2009-07-12 [The green Bastard]: and your just a hippo
2009-07-12 [Alexi Ice]: Well it isn't a place for weird girls to harass Misty-chan, at the very least. (where is everybody)


Hey Turkey-Chan, where is Morty going, anyway?
2009-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Turkey-chan?! ...*points to the sign on the wall saying, "No affixing Japanese suffixes to words!"*...


Morty is dying. He has super cancer...
2009-07-12 [The green Bastard]: dont say that i love you i love this place i love everybody, and its awesome
2009-07-12 [Duke Devlin]: No seriously, where's Mort at? :( 'Cause if he's genuinely ill, I wanna fucking now. The dude actually means something to me. He's ace. <3
2009-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Super cancer!
2009-07-12 [Duke Devlin]: You speaking the truth here? oO 'Cause I'll cry if you are... :(
2009-07-12 [twitchboy]: Duke do i mean something to you?
2009-07-12 [The green Bastard]: Hey my best brother is named Ace!
2009-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't you think that's a little insulting to your other brothers...? ...I mean... you're family... it's not nice to claim favorites! ...except when there is an obvious advantage between/among brothers... like when one brother is smart and the other one has downs syndrome... then it's an obvious choice...


lol... downs syndrome.
2009-07-13 [The green Bastard]: well you see i was dissowned my every one of my family, but him thats why he's the best
2009-07-13 [Alexi Ice]: Sorry Turkey. But seriously. He says he will be back in a year, right. Where is he going? To find himself?
2009-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: No... I'm telling you... it's that blasted super cancer.
2009-07-13 [Alexi Ice]: What the hell is super cancer anyway?
2009-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: How should I know...? ...*chews on some furniture*...
2009-07-13 [The green Bastard]: *takes out a bag of cookies and struggles to open then because he has paws*
2009-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't worry, my friend! There is a quick and easy solution to this! ...*cuts off your paws with a rusty kitchen knife*... you're welcome. And don't forget the bill... Four easy payments of $17.95 (plus s&h)!
2009-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Why do you have to pay for s&h also, you ask? Well, f*** you! Stop asking questions!! ...*grabs Misty and puts a gun to her head*... I'LL DO IT!!!
2009-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... Don't touch me, I didn't do anything.
2009-07-13 [Duke Devlin]: A few of you guys do mean something to me, yes, Twitch.
2009-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do any of the girls?
2009-07-13 [Duke Devlin]: I use 'guys' as a blanket term; it means both girls and boys to me.
2009-07-13 [The green Bastard]: *little shy puppy dies*
2009-07-13 [Duke Devlin]: oO
2009-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *kicks the puppy's limp body*... *tosses it violently into the oven*...
2009-07-14 [weasel2]: ill take a paw
2009-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: I got an invite to bobs diner. O.o I come here all the time.
2009-07-14 [Chimes]: Forum invites, dear.
2009-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: Ah, I see ^^ Makes sense.
2009-07-14 [Duke Devlin]: YARRRRRRRRRRR
2009-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: We need something to do...Like...IDK. Too bad we can't play a beer game *Holds up a random quarter*
2009-07-14 [Duke Devlin]: *throws bacon*
2009-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: *Runs away from bacon* I just took a bath! I dun wanna' get dirty!!! *Grabs tennis racket and starts swatting bacon back*
2009-07-14 [Duke Devlin]: *has tennis racket* *smacks them back yo' way foo'!*
2009-07-14 [twitchboy]: Behold MY BACON CANNON!!!! *fires randomly*
2009-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: HOLY CROW! *Builds snow fort with mud and tucks under to avoid bacon*
2009-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: It's me not you, back from Peru!


Pardon that Misty quote...


Mort Says Stuff
2009-07-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Actually I got it from London from the suite life of zack and cody, and it's old.
2009-07-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: This comment's time will be 06:31:06!
2009-07-15 [Alexi Ice]: HAHAHA.
2009-07-15 [Mrs. No_One]: I remember that quote from that show.
2009-07-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Turkey, you are a dork.
2009-07-17 [Alexi Ice]: But you love him?
2009-07-17 [pixish]: Horse-Rabbit-Horse - Hilarious Radio Style Show :)
2009-07-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: What! Pisha! No, I don't love the Turkey boy, well not that way.   
2009-07-21 [the wonderfall-man]: wat have i missed?
2009-07-21 [the wonderfall-man]: guess the song and artist...


"The video game says "play me"
Face it on a level but it takes you every time on a one on one
Feeling running down your spine
Nothing gonna save your one last dime cause it owns you
Through and through


The databank knows my number
Says i gotta pay cause i made the grade last year
Feel it when i turn the screw
Kicks you round the world, there ain't a thing that it can't do
Do to you"
2009-07-21 [Closet Cowboy]: hello
2009-07-21 [the wonderfall-man]: hi...how are you?
2009-07-21 [Closet Cowboy]: Im good living again
2009-07-21 [Alexi Ice]: Did you mis spell Immortal? Or do I ?
2009-07-21 [Closet Cowboy]: hey im a negitve creep and i'm stoned
2009-07-22 [nokaredes]: That's ac/dc, innit?
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: yup...but what song...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: Nirvana, I've just listened to the song angain, and I am really "digging it 'dog'".
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: why do so many people try to act like there a ganster?
just pitiful if you ask me...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: I am not trying because i am mocking them, i hate tose fuckheads, me and my friends actually bash them, we took out the crips and the blood and whatever jigga boo monkey shit they belong to
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: that sounds like fun...i hate people who try to akt like gangsters,expetialy white guys trying to akt like them...keep mocking and beating some sence into them...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: and i hat the thing girls do with their lips when they take pictures of them selve, they look dumb
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: which kind? ive seen too many bad pictures of girls taking pictures of them self...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: when they puckertheir lips, thos really turn me off
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: it is annoying when they pucker there lipes sometimes...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: i likethe ones of girls that just are natural, if you take a pic its gotta look natural otherwise its not worth looking at
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: guess the song...


"For criminal acts and violence on the stage
For being a brat
Refusing to act your age
For all the decent citizens you've enraged"


"For gambling and drinking alcohol constantly
For making us doubt our parents authority
For choosing to be a living obscenity"


"You're something that never should have happened
You even make your Grandma sick
You'd poison a blind man's dog and steal his cane
You'd gift-wrap a leper
And mail him to your Aunt Jane
You'd even force-feed a diabetic a candy cane"


i took out the name...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: i would soo do that, all of it
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: guess the song...its by alice cooper...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: feed my frankentine! LOL! i dont know i dont really listen to him he's good but im more of a def leperd guy
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: its called Go To Hell...its a good song...like feed my frankenstain...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: my fave song by def leperd is rock of ages, it just gets me pumped!
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: im not sure if ive herd that song...is it good?
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: imma go for a smoke
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: have fun...let me know if you burn your lungs up...
2009-07-22 [Closet Cowboy]: i dont really care anymore
2009-07-22 [the wonderfall-man]: i'll just hope you dont die too soon...
2009-07-23 [Closet Cowboy]: i dont care my life is going no where, i dont even have a chance, the only thing i can do is get a house and then wait
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: what do you meen you dont have a chance...everyone has a chance its just you have to realy want one to actualy see it...dont give up...you'll see it if you keep trying...
2009-07-23 [Closet Cowboy]: yeah, i got a good job it pays good too, but my school is crap, i might have to wiat till next year
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY FREAKY PEEPS!
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: hi...im not a freaky peep...im a crazy peep
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Freaky crazy whatever.
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: that sounds about right...
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok.
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: does anybody like ACDC?
2009-07-23 [Closet Cowboy]: i like their old stuff
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: me too...whats your favorite 5 songs by them...
2009-07-23 [Closet Cowboy]: i feel safe in new yourk city


for those about to rock


thunderstruck


bigballs


i dont really listen to them




i like led zeppelin
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: i love led zeppelin...whats your 5 favorite songs by them...
2009-07-23 [Closet Cowboy]: no quarter


achilies last stand


heartbreaker


thr rain song


all of my love


stairway to heven


dyr maker


misty mountain hop


tea for one and i could go on
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: mine are stairway to heaven


goodtimes badtimes


blackdog


misty mountain hop


the rover


nobody's fault but mine and acouple of others that i cant remember the name...
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Stairway to heaven is a good song, I like Back in black by AC/DC
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: i love ACDC...
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: My brother loves them too, I like them.
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: im bored...i wonder what happend to mort...
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: He left for some reason.
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: great...he was like the mascot for bob's diner...
2009-07-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: I can't remember why he left, but he wrote in his diary that he was leaving.
2009-07-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Super cancer, man. It'll get you every time.
2009-07-23 [Duke Devlin]: *le sigh*
2009-07-23 [the wonderfall-man]: it'll never be the same again...
2009-07-24 [Closet Cowboy]: yeah....
2009-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Indeed... *eats ramen*...
2009-07-24 [Alexi Ice]: Ah.
2009-07-24 [Duke Devlin]: You've got AIDS... Beastman AIDS - And you'll spread it into every good boy and girl today!
Anyway.
2009-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Everyone has AIDS! AIDS AIDS AIDS! AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS AIDS!
2009-07-24 [Duke Devlin]: >:D Not yet.... >:)
2009-07-24 [the wonderfall-man]: hey Mort...how is your Ramenness...
2009-07-24 [Duke Devlin]: Wow this place has kinda died................................
2009-07-24 [Alexi Ice]: *Brings flowers to the grave* Poor Bob's Diner.
2009-07-24 [Duke Devlin]: *Mourns*
2009-07-24 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Bob's Diner explodes in a fiery rage, taking many lives... but mostly just Misty's*
2009-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *flaming badgers erupt from the chimney*
2009-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Darn gay badgers...
2009-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom's a gay badger!
2009-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah, well your mom is dead!
2009-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... You win this round... *eats ramen*... *silently sobs noisily in the rounded out corner*...
2009-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: I knew we shouldn't have hired those Mexicans to build this place... they always cut corners...
2009-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll cut your corner!! ...*pulls out a knife*... *stabs the janitor*...
2009-07-25 [Chimes]: It so told me there was a comment... but I see no new comment. SOMEONE MURDERED IT!
2009-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *hides the body*
2009-07-25 [Chimes]: It was you. :O
2009-07-25 [Closet Cowboy]: watch me give you cum stains in your fuckin drawrs
2009-07-25 [the wonderfall-man]: what the fuck? why are you talking about cum for?
2009-07-25 [Chimes]: It's lyrics to the song his username comes from.
2009-07-25 [the wonderfall-man]: i think im about to hurl... *starts hurling all over beastman aids*
2009-07-25 [Closet Cowboy]: whats the matter?! dont you wanna see me work it now!?
2009-07-25 [Closet Cowboy]: Blackfoot language
2009-07-26 [Alexi Ice]: *Still holding flowers* 
2009-07-26 [Closet Cowboy]: hey dont ignore me i am human too
2009-07-26 [CrystalBlaze]: hello hooooow is all summer going. Me ber have fun at places
2009-07-26 [Duke Devlin]: OMFG I love that you know that, Chimes. XD
I was gonna send that reply, but you did it for me. ;D
2009-07-26 [Chimes]: I have it on my compy... :P And Chris plays it all the time. He and his friends sing(if you can call it singing) it often XD
I'm just that good XD
2009-07-26 [Duke Devlin]: I swear I downloaded it onto your laptop before. XD
2009-07-26 [Chimes]: You might've... for it might be on here twice... XD I know I downloaded it sometime ago too.
2009-07-26 [Duke Devlin]: How odd. oO
2009-07-26 [Chimes]: I'll check some day.
2009-07-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: Luckily, AT&T isn't my ISP... so I can still visit mah /b/. I laugh at you AT&T users!
2009-07-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey, you bunch of losers... how come you ain't commenting?! B's D's anniversary is next month! We need several thousand more comments, darn you!
2009-07-28 [Closet Cowboy]: is this another one of phenix's wiki's?
2009-07-28 [Alexi Ice]: Would the dead bobs diner go to heaven or hell?
2009-07-28 [Thunder Cid]: Read and you may find out :P
2009-07-28 [Closet Cowboy]: please visit me at my wiki and i will teach you some of my language, i speak the Blackfoot language
2009-07-28 [Closet Cowboy]: you can advertize here if you visit my wiki
2009-07-28 [Alexi Ice]: Read what?
2009-07-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: ಠ.ಠ I'm not seeing several thousand comments yet, you guys...
2009-07-28 [Alexi Ice]: How the hell are we supposed to do thaT?
2009-07-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's simple, really...


( ፨ )  ( ፡ )  ( ። )  ( · )  ( ∴ )  ( ᎒᎒ )  (:·:)


...we just ask Shenron!
2009-07-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Now... how to phrase the wish... uh...


Yo, Shen!


Hurry up and make your wish.


Don't take that tone with me! I wish you would act a little bit nicer, jerk... wait... OH SHI-


Your wish is granted, sir. Have a nice day!


*dragon balls fly away*


FFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-
2009-07-28 [Chimes]: Well, we could spam. :P
2009-07-28 [Alexi Ice]: Spamming sounds fun!
2009-07-28 [Ukia]: *blinks* *ponders*
2009-07-29 [Closet Cowboy]: *flies in* hey guys whats with the big dragon dude*takes a drag of a little white rolled smoke*
2009-07-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I haven't been commenting because I was in Virginia.
2009-07-29 [Duke Devlin]: Darn Dragonballs. D:
2009-07-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes indeed.
2009-07-29 [twitchboy]: arise shinron! i wish...for the worlds most comfortable underwear!
2009-07-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you the worlds most comfortable underwear* Here you are!
2009-07-30 [twitchboy]: SCORE!!!
2009-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2009-07-30 [twitchboy]: *parties in the undies* Party over here! whoop whoop
2009-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Party over there whoop whoop! *dances*
2009-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *a big tank rolls in to sweep the trash away*... *tank runs over Misty*... *tank gets major dents*...
2009-07-30 [twitchboy]: lol omg thats wrong....funny but wrong
2009-07-30 [Alexi Ice]: Ur mom is wrong.
2009-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets up and dusts myself off* What was that Turkey's mom?
2009-07-30 [Closet Cowboy]: oh my god, these chicken fingers amebara, oh my god
2009-07-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... I beg your pardon?
2009-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *drives the tank back in through the wall*... *takes aim at Misty*... *fires rockets*...
2009-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Speaking of which, you know there was no holocaust, right?
2009-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Duh... it's just a hoax perpetrated by the Jews to get money... *eats ramen*...
2009-07-30 [Duke Devlin]: I concur.
2009-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: So true... so true... *sniffle*... *snorts cocaine*... *rubs teeth*...
2009-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! Those are my teeth!
2009-07-30 [Duke Devlin]: Ghey,
2009-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: You're ghey!
2009-07-30 [Duke Devlin]: So's your FACE! D:<
2009-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *rips face off*... not anymore!
2009-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Gentlemen! Ladies! ...*glances at Duke's chest*... *gropes to make sure*... yes, ladies! ...our true enemy here isn't each other, but rather Misty! *throws hot sauce in Misty's eyes*
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *has no eyes*
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: external activity is a manifestation of internal psychic activity...So like I said resolve your issues....cataclysm is a result of a cataclysmic psyche
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: *Lights a smoke*
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: What are you talking about? *pops my eyes back in*
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: *blows smoke out* I dont know i just feel....different
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok, that's odd Mr. pervert.
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: I love how ignored I am.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: MITSU! *glomps*
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: No you just dont speak, i will listen to you if you speak, i am pure, and good do wont screw you around or mess with your wiki all you have to do is speak to me and i will talk, but if you ignore, i will do thing without thinking, because thats just my mind trying to get attention from you guys
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: <3 *Glomps Misty*


Cowboy - Sounds like it's your mind trying to get your ass reported.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks* I didn't understand a word of that, was that even english Mitsu?
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah it was. A threat, I belive.
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: Go ahead and report me, i didnt do anything wrong, all i did was peak my mind,i guess thats why they call you guys artist wannabe's but thats not me, bann me if you like but in the end the universe will serve it justice.
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: I woudlnt care
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: i dont care, but i do care about your happiness soo report me and get me banned, NOW!!!
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh... why would we want you banned? If you didn't threaten us then you're fine.
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: So Misty Chan, Whatzup?
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: because akane wants to..she doesnt want me here or is it a he
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mitsu is a girl, and she just thought you were threatening us and that your mind sounded like you wanted to be reported.


Nothing's up Mitsu, I'm just chatting with my boyfriend.
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: How cute <3. I'm bored out of my freaking mind (The problem with being a Vampire is that no one is on at night) Ugh.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm on.
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: That;s true. But you are busy talking to your Boyfriend.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: I am multitasking.
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: Me too. I'm chatting with Holly and Darran, writing for our RPG and listning to Chevelle.
2009-07-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Closet Cowboy]... I am the universe. I do not serve out justice, but let individuals take matters into their own hands. Justice is an idiosyncratic point of view, left for each of us to decide upon ourselves. Our experiences shape our views of justice. So why should I, the universe, serve justice? My existence is due to the fact that people exist and think. I am what everyone makes of me. This is why I cannot deal justice... because my own views of justice are distorted and twisted. People perceive me differently, so I am different from what everyone perceives. My view of justice may be one that nobody will like... I am controlled by the thoughts and actions of those within me. Each individual bends me to their will...


HYAA HA HAAAAW!!


Just kidding, little orc. I am my own universe! You are simply parasites living in my belly...


*blows up a planet of peaceful aliens for my amusement*
2009-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNOOOOOOOOO!! ...NAMEK!!!
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: Sounds a lot like something off of Halo. O.o
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mitsu the Darren you speak of wouldn't be [Sideways] would it?
2009-07-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: HAR HAR HAAAAR!! *sends massive bolts of energy into the depths of space, killing trillions of never before seen species*
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: I thought you didn't like [Sideways].
2009-07-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hmm... the universe's terror goes unnoticed... *sighs*... *sips some coffee*... *reads a newspaper*...
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: It doesn't take long for us to make up, I guess.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh really, that's cool.
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: I guess. Lol.
I saw the Terror Turkey...terror turkey...Ha.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Terror Turkey??
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: look at acention series the key..it is wicked stuff..mind changing stuff
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh...
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: Doesn't that sound funny. Terror Turkey Terror Turkey Terror Turkey *sings*
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol *sings along* Terror Turkey Terror Turkey Terror Turkey
2009-07-31 [Closet Cowboy]: it is the study of music and the effects it has on the human body, i am watching one, and its making me want to sleep..its soo peacful
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: HAHAHA I wonder how long before Turkey realizes we just made a kick ass nickname for him?
2009-07-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: That username is bad and you should feel bad!
2009-07-31 [Duke Devlin]: Aye, that it be.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-07-31 [Duke Devlin]: Ahhhh we need to revive this place. :P
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, we do.
2009-07-31 [Duke Devlin]: Plan, eh?
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well I don't think my friends would comment other than Twitch and Mitsu.
2009-07-31 [Duke Devlin]: XD I don't really have many friends on right now. :P
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why's that?
2009-07-31 [Alexi Ice]: HAHAHA. My friends might come.
2009-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mine might, but I don't know.
2009-08-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Let's get some discussion going here...


USA > Europe
2009-08-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Alrighty then Terror Turkey.
2009-08-02 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm.. In some respects, Turkey, certainly.
2009-08-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: ................jerk!
2009-08-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJ5zhAZTlwY&NR=1
2009-08-03 [Thunder Cid]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JjGd1C6E4ys
2009-08-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Weeeeeell, hooker spit! ...I done seen that thar video befer... *chews on straw*... *molests passersby*... *Misty suddenly passes by*... *abruptly stops molesting*...
2009-08-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: 9/02/09
2009-08-03 [Duke Devlin]: XD
2009-08-03 [Alexi Ice]: *YAWN*
2009-08-03 [Closet Cowboy]: Yo
2009-08-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's boring without Mr. Penguin.
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: I must agree. Why is Morty turning up on the council page and not here?
2009-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, that stupid Penguin!
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *slowly unsheathes a big...... gun!*
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *can't get the gun to work right*... *grows frustrated and starts beating misty with it*...
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Woot! The diner is free again! <3
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Not quite... *points at the bodyguard taking up admission*... It'll cost you ten bucks to get in... and twenty to get out.
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Oh *Pays in pennies* There you go!
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: I just invited all my friends. I should win some kind of award or something O.o (I want a cheese sandwich...or...a puppy?)
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *meticulously counts the pennies*
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... how about a puppy sandwich?
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Ok, good enough.
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *slingshots pennies at Misty's face*
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: 

2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm suddenly hungry... and aroused... I'm not sure which one I'm more disturbed about! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: ...HAHAHA! <3 Your awesome, Mort. (And sick and wrong but that's besides the point)
2009-08-05 [Sideways]: I have come to order one cup of your coffee then take up a table all day while i Listen to an Ipod, talk on the phone and go clickity clack on a macbook air all day. I shallt be your resident liberal jerk! Bwahahaha
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: We already have two of those... *points at [Duke Devlin] and [Chimes]*...
2009-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *attends Straight Dave's Man Slam*... Alright! Straight Dave rules!
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Actually three. I'm not really a jerk but I am a libreral. <3 WOOT!


Sideways is just here to protect me from your penny throwing, Morty.
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: lib⋅er⋅al  /ˈlɪbərəl, ˈlɪbrəl/ Show Spelled Pronunciation [lib-er-uhl, lib-ruhl] Show IPA
Use liberal in a Sentence
–adjective 1. favorable to progress or reform, as in political or religious affairs.
2. (often initial capital letter) noting or pertaining to a political party advocating measures of progressive political reform.
3. of, pertaining to, based on, or advocating liberalism.
4. favorable to or in accord with concepts of maximum individual freedom possible, esp. as guaranteed by law and secured by governmental protection of civil liberties.
5. favoring or permitting freedom of action, esp. with respect to matters of personal belief or expression: a liberal policy toward dissident artists and writers. 
6. of or pertaining to representational forms of government rather than aristocracies and monarchies.
7. free from prejudice or bigotry; tolerant: a liberal attitude toward foreigners. 
8. open-minded or tolerant, esp. free of or not bound by traditional or conventional ideas, values, etc.
9. characterized by generosity and willingness to give in large amounts: a liberal donor. 
10. given freely or abundantly; generous: a liberal donation. 
11. not strict or rigorous; free; not literal: a liberal interpretation of a rule. 
12. of, pertaining to, or based on the liberal arts.
13. of, pertaining to, or befitting a freeman.


I really don't see a downside to being Liberal...O.o but that's just me <3 <3
2009-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Elftown Sculptors - Spam! (Not that amoung the five people actually here I expect one of you to be a sculptor but hey..it's worth a shot, right?)
2009-08-05 [Goma]: o_o
2009-08-05 [Ninja Smurf]: query?
2009-08-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: JERRY! *hugs* Sup Daddy Worebucks? XD
2009-08-06 [the wonderfall-man]: hey guys...
2009-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: HOLA! *waves* How's it going?
2009-08-06 [the wonderfall-man]: its going good...
2009-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Awesome, oh guess what, guess what!
2009-08-06 [the wonderfall-man]: what?
2009-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mr. Pervy snake got banned.
2009-08-06 [the wonderfall-man]: i dont think ive herd of him before...
2009-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: Who?
2009-08-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: Ummm wow......I havent been here in a long time
2009-08-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: [Closet Cowboy], I call him Mr. Pervy snake, he got banned.
2009-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not nice, Misty... you should be ashamed of yourself... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~steals Mort's ramen~
2009-08-06 [Goma]: 


Samuel L. Jackson approves
2009-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: Oh right. That guy is super annoying because he keeps coming back. Ugh.


And LOL Goma.
2009-08-06 [Goma]: isn't it like...I don't even know the words to use for that pic I just couldn't stop laughing >.<
2009-08-06 [Ninja Smurf]: umm.. wow
I am already lost, and here I thought I just figured it all out... dammit.
2009-08-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: ... ~eats pocky~
2009-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Pocky is for douchebags... *eats RAMEN like a real (poor) man!*...
2009-08-06 [the wonderfall-man]: *eats some ramen and some homeade Pocky* thats a weird picture.
2009-08-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: Shh Mort!
2009-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *puts pocky in ramen and eats it* WHAT NOW?!
2009-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *cuts Misty's little toe off with scissors*
2009-08-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: O_O Misty!
2009-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh I'm fine. *shows you my foot as my little toe grows back*
2009-08-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: Wow.....
2009-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, I know. *hugs*
2009-08-08 [Alexi Ice]: O.o
2009-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: What's wrong Mitsu?
2009-08-08 [Alexi Ice]: I don't know...I'm bored.
2009-08-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, I see.
2009-08-09 [Araglas]: Hey all, sorry I have been absent from Bob's Diner, Does anyone need a Zombie Burger?
2009-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sing song voice* I DO!
2009-08-09 [Alexi Ice]:   
  


2009-08-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Prepare for what?
2009-08-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol
2009-08-09 [Alexi Ice]: A zombie attack...
2009-08-09 [Fallen Child Athena]: Wow......
2009-08-11 [the wonderfall-man]: i likie ZOMBIES!!!!! *runs tord the zombie mob then comes back with a zombie head and kicks it back at them closing the door* were surrownded...
2009-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Eat at Bob's Diner! Now serving real meat by-products!
into Japanese
ボブのダイナーで食事を！今すぐに本物の肉製品を提供！
back into English
Diners eat at the Bob! The real meat products right now!
back into Japanese
ダイナーズのボブで食べる！本物の肉製品は、今！
back into English
Diners eat at Bob's! The real meat products, now!
back into Japanese
ダイナーズで食べるのボブ！本物の肉製品は、今！
back into English
Diners eat at Bob's! The real meat products, now!
2009-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.translationparty.com
2009-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Jerks! Stop not commenting! ...we only have half a month until a new friscal year starts!
2009-08-11 [the wonderfall-man]: not my fault i have to go to bed at 9pm during the week...
2009-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I can't get on Sundays or Mondays.
2009-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: What kind of crappy excuses are those?! ...both my arms were torn off by a moose who broke in and killed my entire family! ...but I still manage to comment! ...heck, while my parents' remains were being buried, I was at home... commenting. You see, it takes that kind of devotion... now get to work! ...*eats ramen with his remaining foot*...
2009-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Riiiight.
2009-08-12 [the wonderfall-man]: *flips him beckwards while he's eating* your arms are in your shirt...
2009-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I have no shirt!
2009-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ARE YOU NAKED?!
2009-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ARE YOU?!
2009-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, I'm fully clothed, why would I be naked?
2009-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Thank God... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hope the moose comes back and rapes you. *glares*
2009-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *chews on barbequed moose leg*... probably not gonna happen...
2009-08-12 [Duke Devlin]: Moose don't like rape. They like consentual acts of love. ;)
2009-08-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Zebras like rape...
2009-08-12 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-08-13 [Ninja Smurf]: wow.. this is.... interesting..
2009-08-13 [Alexi Ice]: *Sits in the corner and munches on Blood.*
2009-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Fine then I'll get a Zebra to rape him. Stupid Penguin!
2009-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty, you're boring... either stop being boring or MOVE BACK TO MEXICO!!! ...*throws rice at it*...
2009-08-13 [Alexi Ice]: At it?
2009-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: At it.
2009-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not from Mexico, I'm not a Mexican, I was born in Idaho, I'm a spud head.
2009-08-13 [Alexi Ice]: That's kinda mean. *Eyes the Zombies outside*
 (Born and raised in the Lone Star State. Go UT.)
2009-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol awesome!
2009-08-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: ..... ((UT!!!!!!! Hell yes!!!! A&M suck!!!))
2009-08-13 [Alexi Ice]: *Pulls out a smoke* *Lights a peice of the diner on fire*
2009-08-13 [Ninja Smurf]: *makes smores*
2009-08-13 [Alexi Ice]: ZOMG I love smores. I had them last night, seriously!
2009-08-13 [Ninja Smurf]: lol me to!
2009-08-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've never had smores.
2009-08-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: O_O Never?!?! ~gives Misty some smores~
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: You know it's hard to imangine what a smore tastes like when you've never had one.
2009-08-14 [Alexi Ice]: They taste kind of like snicers.
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner needs a better class of criminal- I mean, customer... I'm off to invite some new members.
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and no, they do not taste like snickers! I'll KILL YOU!! *swings a machete*
2009-08-14 [the wonderfall-man]: what the heck was that all about?
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: KI-YAH! *bashes [the wonderfall-man] in the spine with a wooden chair*
2009-08-14 [the wonderfall-man]: *breaks the chair without a scrach*
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: KI-YAH! *bashes a wooden chair in the spine with [the wonderfall-man]*
2009-08-14 [the wonderfall-man]: *disapears into a tree and eats some Pockys*
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Why do we have trees in here...? ...*shrugs*... *reads the local newpaper*...
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: *Stumbles into the room* O_o
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: "Stumbles"? ...are you saying my floorboards are bad?! ...wait... nevermind... we don't have floorboards... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: No floor? *Looks down* What am I standing on?!
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Not sure... *pokes the ground*... *it twitches and hisses*... It's probably best not to provoke it though...
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *looks around suspiciously* Um...why was I brought here? The food looks leathal...
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I have no time for your trivial questions! ...*lounges about*... *reads a magazine*...
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: *Stops screaming about there being no floor and looks up*
It's okay, I was brought here too *Nods*
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *glares at the person behind the magazine* And the people are strange. *pulls out notebook and starts writing* Mom, these strange people kidnapped me. Send help ASAP.
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not strange, ok maybe just a little, but it's cool.
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... that's a nice notebook you have there... where'd you ge- HHHHNNNNGGH!! MY HEART! ...*collapses on the floor*...
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *pokes with foot, then continues writing* And I think this guy just had a heart attack. Send an ambulence as well.
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh my! *pokes him with a stick* Hey Mr. Penguin, you ok?
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: *Sits on his carcass* comfey.
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh that's gross, you don't know where he's been.
2009-08-14 [Thunder Cid]: *turns into a toaster*
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *puts notebook away* Hey, anyone want toast?
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: *Shrugs* I don't find things gross really, just cool
*Looks at toaster* HI! *Waves*
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: *Waves arms in air frantically* I likes toast!!!
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *makes toast in the Cid toaster*
2009-08-14 [Thunder Cid]: *broken...pops out a nickel*


(and why would you wave at a toaster? O_o)
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: :3
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *claims nickel* Mine!
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck is a toaster doing in here...? This is a place of business, not toast! ...*bashes the toaster with a metal bat*...
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: DON'T DO THAT MR. PENGUIN!
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *wrestles metal bat from Mort* Hey! Don't kill the toaster! It gave me a nickel! *beats mort with the bat instead*
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs as she eats popcorn and watches*
2009-08-14 [Thunder Cid]: *toaster spewing nickels*
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: NICKELS! *catches*
2009-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...My face!
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh it's an improvement.
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: O_o;
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: What, I'm just kidding. He's always mean to me even when I'm not online, I read the comments that I miss after I leave.
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: *hits one more time for good measure, then shoulders bat*
2009-08-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~watches~ Holy s**t Batman
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-08-14 [Fallen Child Athena]: :P
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: BATMAN!
2009-08-14 [Alexi Ice]: Joker you better be sick or dead in there I shit you not. - Stolen Robot Chicken quote.
2009-08-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol AWESOME!
2009-08-14 [0-Aki]: CAFFINEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
2009-08-14 [Ninja Smurf]: i was missing.. did i miss anything? lol
2009-08-14 [Flisky]: I just beat the crap out of Mort with his own bat. *wipes bat off on shirt*
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs* I got nickles from the toaster.
2009-08-15 [Thunder Cid]: *smoking toaster*
2009-08-15 [Tekkon KinKreet]:     shroomhead likes nickles....
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-08-15 [0-Aki]: O_O
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Funny.
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: We have an average of 11.322857142857142857142857142857 comments a day, people! Come on! We can do better!
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the hell?!
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: That would mean that, in total, B's D averages 14.533959138597459966869133075649 comments a day since the beginning. That's just terrible... and in fifteen days, at the end of this friscal year, it will be B's D's fifth anniversary... *spits on the floor*... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wow fifth anniversary huh?
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]: *Strolls in, obviously amazing*
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh hello Nekko.
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: i am commenting.. does that help? i hope that helps.. maybe.. hmm..
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: ahh and now you are commenting again.. I think I see a patern here..
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Yes, yes you do.
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: so umm.. now what?
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: No idea.
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: oh.. wow.. big help there.. *throws noodles at you* hehe *hides*
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *growls* I'M TELLING JESSA!
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *whittles the soap in the bathrooms into lewd objects*
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]: *Uses the lewd objects and molests old ladies with them*


That'll teach them to be old!
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: eep! no telling jessa!! tattle tale!...




oooo.. lewd objects?


ewwww old ladies...
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: wow.. it's my street sign...
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]: Now we're on our way!
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: on our way where?
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]: *Points to the sign*
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: I assume from the sign we're on our way to hell.
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: hold on.. *looks around* yep.. plenty of room for all ofyou here... right next to the furnace
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]: OH SHIT!


  

2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: my god.. hell did freeze over... what are the fuckin odds of that?
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: heres something really sad.. my street is actually named OLD DEAD river road
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH NO! That means. *shuders* NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: wow.. i like frozen hell.. skiing for me! yay!
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah but I told someone I wouldn't be their friend untill Hell froze over. *sighs* He's so creepy.
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: hows he gonna know? it's a private club ><
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright, alright... this isn't 4chan... *eats ramen*... or... is it...? ...no, I'm pretty sure it isn't... but, then again.........
2009-08-15 [Ninja Smurf]: me think no...
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Sadly, that's all of Jamal I have... But here's this!


  

2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Aaaaanyfreakinway... I'm off to do questionable activities now... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-15 [Nekko fox]: Enjoy your ramen of questionable origins.
2009-08-15 [Alexi Ice]: I missed a lot O.o Damn.
2009-08-15 [Tekkon KinKreet]: is there something shady going on? *Looks around in a shady manner*
2009-08-15 [Alexi Ice]: Always!
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the crap is up with that nursing pic?! *shudders*
2009-08-15 [Tekkon KinKreet]: mmmmmmmmmmm good ole shadyness.... *Sits in corner and reads shady magazine*
2009-08-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Shady?
2009-08-15 [0-Aki]: O_o
2009-08-16 [Young J.C.]: So... what do I do here?
2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Just be random!
2009-08-16 [Young J.C.]: Sweet, sweet. I can do that.
2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY! *dances*
2009-08-16 [Ninja Smurf]: ogaly boogaly... boo
2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHO?!
2009-08-16 [Ninja Smurf]: boogaly...
2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-08-16 [Alexi Ice]:   
  

  


2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol That's funny.
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: um...?
2009-08-16 [Young J.C.]: Does signs are funny. lol
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Makes ya SMILE!


  

2009-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet zombie Jesus!
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: You called?


  

2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_O
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY! DON'T MAKE FUN OF CHRISTIANITY!
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: ^_^


  



  



  



  

2009-08-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Fuck you!
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: I lawled


  



  



  

2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: And it's true O_O
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2009-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: What? No Raptor Jesus?
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   


  



  



  



  



  



  



  

2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [Alexi Ice]: Dude. Raptors are epic.
2009-08-16 [Alexi Ice]: 


2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   


  



  

2009-08-16 [Ninja Smurf]: http://www.zeitgeistthemovie.com in keeping up with the current theme..go there, download/watch the movie...
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Already watched it. Several times. It is simply wondrous!
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: That and Religulous say it plain:




  



It's just that Religulous is all encompassing towards religion in general.
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: http://media.photobucket.com/image/divided%20by%20zero/DHeichel/Dividedbyzero.jpg
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   





  






2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: Sweet xD
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Ain't it though?
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: http://media.photobucket.com/image/funny%20icons/Lesrow/batman.jpg



My Spork thinks he's Batman!
2009-08-16 [Ninja Smurf]: hmmm. I have come to the conclusion that some people have waaaaaaaayyyyy too much free time lol but I love it.. and I think i am one of them.. so yay for us slacker types!!!
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: Yay^^ Hiya Joker, Im Veari
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: This goes with all the religin stuff up there xD




http://media.photobucket.com/image/funny%20icons/thetearsyoullneversee/icons/more%20more%20icons/really_funny.gif
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: You know how they have those signs that read "No shirt, no shoes, n service"?
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: That's what I think of their signs!
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: Well they neva said anything bout pants xD
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: http://media.photobucket.com/image/funny%20icons/IconsMakeItBetter/Funny%20icons/ththavooba.gif For Mort and his Ramen xD
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: I'm a gamer. I live on caffeine, sugar, and empty calories!
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: xD I dont need to get life, Im a gamer, I hsve many
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: I am a God. 'Nuff said.
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: I was athiest till I realized I was god
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: Foamy: Someone shouldstab you in the eye with a really hot French Fry!
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Foamy's old videos were the shit...now...Well, not so much.
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: I agree. Happy Tree Friends were funny too
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Were.
2009-08-16 [Fallen Child Athena]: yea, back in the day >.<
2009-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-08-16 [Ninja Smurf]: Hi Veri.. I am jerry, or Joker.. which ever..
2009-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: In one day, we've raised the comment average up by .3! ...that's a good thing... but not a great thing. Work harder! ...losers... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-16 [Ninja Smurf]: hey.. we tried.. where were you?:p
2009-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I was in the bathroom! ...eating... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-17 [Ninja Smurf]: you get your ramen from the bathroom? ewwww
2009-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, yeah... doesn't everyone?
2009-08-17 [krb2]:
i LOVE bob's diner


2009-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn straight you do, punk! *smacks [krb2]*... now go tell more people to come here!
2009-08-17 [Nekko fox]: The new guy seems over-enthusiastic about his job.... I mean, sure, Bob's Diner is the only Syphilis ridden, vice-powered cesspool around where you can have your eyes gouged out while having your stomach pumped, but that's no reason to say "Love". Tossing around a word like that is....dangerous...
2009-08-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *covers ears* Twice... now....
2009-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses 'love' around*... *one of the dangerous 'love's kills Misty*... *throws Misty's body into the ocean*... *the ocean overflows, killing millions of people on the shore*...
2009-08-17 [Nekko fox]: You see, damn it all!


*Slaps [krb2]*


This is all your fault, damn it!
2009-08-17 [Thunder Cid]: By God [krb2] if you say that word one more time I will gouge out you eyeballs and skullfuck you!
2009-08-17 [Nekko fox]: And I, sir, shall fornicate with your ocular cavity as well!
2009-08-17 [Ninja Smurf]: ok.. umm... *hides*
2009-08-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *goes into shock from overusage of word "love"* hhhhrrrrrrrrrrnnnnnnnnn
2009-08-17 [the wonderfall-man]: why would someone use that word too many times?
2009-08-17 [Flisky]: *snorts* Did someone just say 'fornicate' and 'occular' in the same sentence?
2009-08-17 [Ninja Smurf]: umm yes they did..
2009-08-17 [Flisky]: *laughs* Terrific.
2009-08-18 [Nekko fox]: It is that important.
2009-08-18 [Alexi Ice]: *Staring at the others* How long was I gone for?
2009-08-18 [Nekko fox]: Far too long.
2009-08-18 [Ninja Smurf]: or not long enough.. depends on the outlook really.. the conversation as gone waaayyyy downhill... but we like it that way
2009-08-18 [Tekkon KinKreet]: so easier to go downhill.... than... well.... uphill.
2009-08-18 [the wonderfall-man]: it is easier that way...
2009-08-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: What have I missed???
2009-08-18 [Ninja Smurf]: A lot.
2009-08-18 [Weregon]: Hello
2009-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: This week on Bob's Diner, I will be introducing you to some Mexican music. No, not the crappy kind with nothing but accordians, but some decent kind... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ASXzq1O9rrc
2009-08-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: Wow.....
2009-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: And next week, we invade Poland! Glory to the Reich! Sieg heil!
2009-08-19 [Flisky]: Woohoo! Invading Poland!
2009-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *marches into Poland*... *forgets what he's doing*... *marches straight into Belarus*...
2009-08-19 [Flisky]: *looks around* I need a drink...
2009-08-19 [twitchboy]: one mountian screw coming up! *hands flisk a drink*
2009-08-19 [Tekkon KinKreet]: bud light please?
2009-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: KI-YAH! *hurls some strange foreign beer at your face*
2009-08-19 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *catches with teeth* what the hell man... trying to commit alcohol abuse?!?
2009-08-19 [Flisky]: Hey, drinks. *drinks*
2009-08-19 [Nekko fox]: NO! The drinks are poisoned!
2009-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet, you! *tases [Nekko fox]*
2009-08-19 [Flisky]: *drinks poison drinks that seem to have no affect on her* What poison?
2009-08-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~watches silently~
2009-08-19 [the wonderfall-man]: why are you guys drinking poison?
2009-08-19 [Tekkon KinKreet]: cuz its oh so groooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood
2009-08-19 [the wonderfall-man]: *slaps everyone drinking poison* your all crazy if you like poison...
2009-08-19 [Flisky]: *ponders* Hey, what kinda poison is this?
2009-08-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: Rat poison???
2009-08-19 [the wonderfall-man]: its a mix of rat, bug, ant poison, gasoline and oil...
2009-08-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: Oh wow....
2009-08-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: For once no one has talked bad about me. *is shocked*
2009-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: AAAHH! BLOB MONSTER!! ...KILL IT WITH FIRE!! *blow torches Misty's face*
2009-08-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah, I love it! *hugs Mortified Penguin* You are the bestest friend.
2009-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: IT'S EATING MEEEEEE!! ........NNNOOOOOOOOOOO!! *is consumed*... *eats ramen*... *is digested*...
2009-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait... how many times have I been eaten and digested here?! ...this is at least the third time... that I know of...
2009-08-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: wait... how are you speaking?  you've been digested.... o_0
2009-08-20 [Nekko fox]: His ectoplasmic residue is capable of creating vibrations in the air that resonate in the proper timbre and pitch that it actually attunes to the human ear, thus allowing speech. It also causes cancer in small, parasitic creatures like Syra.
2009-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks wikipedia*... he's right! ...Cool Ranch Doritos are delicious!
2009-08-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hmmm i see *nods sagely but understood nothing* lol
2009-08-20 [Weregon]: Hi.
2009-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Quiet Weregon! We are in the middle of a deeply intuitive conversation covering the convergent particles expelled by a fourth dimensional flux created by hampering interplanetary collisions facilitated by extreme deviations of central orbit found in a both planets and stars alike!
2009-08-20 [Weregon]: You mean your geeking out over ectoplasma?
2009-08-20 [Flisky]: Wait...That makes very little sense, but I think it all boils down to gravitation pull created by the centrifugal force of bodies of matter in constant movement in a void created by a vacuum therefore keeping everything both stable and constant.
2009-08-20 [CrystalBlaze]: what ??? you me confuzled
2009-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-08-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *gets dizzy and crashes to the floor* o_0
2009-08-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: Huh.............Im lost
2009-08-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: You ok Tekkon?
2009-08-21 [Alexi Ice]: ...
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: ...0_O *Brain is dripping out his ear*
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: What??
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: couldn't... take... smart... people talk... one thing... will save me....
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: What, what will save you?
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: come closer....
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks and comes closer*
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i need.. *whispers*
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: You need what?
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *whispers again*
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh lol. *feeds you ramen*
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *jumps back up* i'm good... kthx
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: DERRRRRRRRRRRR ... uh... must be a side effect of losing half my brain...
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs* Possibly, grabs the half from the floor* Uh... here. *holds it out to you*
2009-08-22 [Ninja Smurf]: whats half of one percent of a braincell in dimensions? (jsut curious..)
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't know.
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hey... i resent that statement.... ... its dimensions would be microscopic you would need a very very high-powerd microscope *takes brains and puts them back* thanks
2009-08-22 [the wonderfall-man]: *starts poking Tekkon's brains* i wonder what brains taste like...
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hey... ummm... you're not allowed to eat my brains... besides.. they wouldn't taste good... i'm a shit for brains... ^^
2009-08-22 [twitchboy]: confucius say he who stand on toilet, high on pot
2009-08-22 [Ninja Smurf]: wow.. don't you mean shit for brain cell?
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *picks up frozen tuna and slaps joker*  ... you smell like fish...
2009-08-22 [CrystalBlaze]: hehehe is we having FOOD FIGHT
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *smacks crystal* mmmmaaaaaaaayyyyyyyybeeeeeeeee
2009-08-22 [Thunder Cid]: Finally a chance to use the diner's food cannon. Eat tumble weed bitches!
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *flips table and gets down behind it* bravo squad!!! flanking maneuver!! I need air support! *throws fish at cid*
2009-08-22 [Thunder Cid]: Alpha Tango 572 this is Uncle Sam requesting carpet bomb due 4 clicks north-northwest.
2009-08-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *tears up a big piece of carpet, throws some food in it, and then tosses it at cid* AFFIRMATIVE!!!
2009-08-22 [Thunder Cid]: Damn! *jumps for cover throwing a bloody chicken*
2009-08-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws icecream at Cid and Tekkon*
2009-08-22 [Thunder Cid]: *throws gunpowder infused squirrels at Amebara*
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: EEP! *dodges and throws pizza at Cid*
2009-08-23 [Thunder Cid]: *matrix*
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2009-08-23 [Thunder Cid]: Silence pig *throws bacon*
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: PIG?! *tackles*
2009-08-23 [Thunder Cid]: *POOF...gone*
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY! *turns into a white wolf*
2009-08-23 [Thunder Cid]: *...still gone*
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sniffs the air and growls*
2009-08-23 [Thunder Cid]: *eats bacon*
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *steals your bacon*
2009-08-23 [Thunder Cid]: Uhh I'm gone fool.
2009-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Holy crap! This food! ...this mess! ...It's... IT'S... going to be hard for the janitor to clean up... *eats ramen*... Yo, Paco! El cleano the flooro!
2009-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: "My name is Jim, damn it!"


I don't hear scrubbing, Pedro! ...am I going to have to dock your pay down another five dollars? Down to $-3.50? ...Huh?! You want to be paying me?! Now shut up or I'll have you deported!


"Screw you! I was born here!"


Oh really? *picks up phone* ...Hello? ...INS?


"I'm working, I'm working!"


That's what I thought... *eats ramen*... *reads the newspaper*...
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks and is in human form once more* You're strange Mr. Penguin.
2009-08-23 [Ninja Smurf]: wow... *checks outside* ok kiddos.. the short bus is back for you.. make sure you don't lick the windows this time... poor little Paco has to clean all this mess up all by himself.. what were you thinking?
2009-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Who are you talking to?
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: Paco, of course!
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: Good Gods!
2009-08-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: and if you do lick a window, make sure you're wearing your helmet, just in case the bus hits a bump *smacks pedro with frozen tuna* CLEAN HARDER!
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: These Schnoz Berries taste like Schnoz Berries!
2009-08-23 [CrystalBlaze]: holly coments. its living
2009-08-23 [Duke Devlin]: OM NOM NOM!
2009-08-23 [Fallen Child Athena]: .....wow
2009-08-23 [Duke Devlin]: ;D
2009-08-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: please dont bite your tongue
2009-08-23 [Ninja Smurf]: or if you do, at least bite it hard enough to give us entertainment...
2009-08-23 [the wonderfall-man]: whats happend?
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: You did. Congratulations, you are now the entertainment for the evening. Now dance monkey!
2009-08-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *winds music box, creating tinny music* dance! wait... where's you cap?
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: *Produces a cap for [the wonderfall-man]* Here, have him where this.
2009-08-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *puts cap on [the wonderfall-man] then play the music box again*
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: *watches the new monkey dance*
2009-08-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i think we have a mascot lmao
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: I approve. Quick! Someone fetch a camera!
2009-08-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *tosses camera to nekko* hurry! while he dances!!
2009-08-23 [Nekko fox]: *Takes action snapshots*
2009-08-23 [Ninja Smurf]: it's like a cartoon that never ends... hehe
2009-08-23 [the wonderfall-man]: *gets bored and throws the cap at [Tekkon KinKreet] and climbs a tree like a monkey then starts throwing fresh poop at him" i dont like danceing like a monkey anymore,this is more fun.
2009-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY!
2009-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Shh! This is a library... *eats ramen noisily*...
2009-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: No it's not.
2009-08-24 [Nekko fox]: Fuck yes it is! Now hush up and read your engineering manuals.
2009-08-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: fuck engineering... i just... i just wanna... I JUST WANNA DANCE!!!
2009-08-24 [Ninja Smurf]: hey! Tek is the new moonkey.. *puts hat on Tek*
2009-08-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *dance's around, using his moonkey-ish antics as a cover to steal everyones wallets* a moonkeys life for me.
2009-08-24 [Nekko fox]: *Cuts off the "monkey's paw" and sells it back to him, promising him that it will grant him wishes that are twisted around against him*
2009-08-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *falls out from blood loss*
2009-08-24 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my!
2009-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Lions and tigers and bears! ..........are all in today's soup. ...*stirs a big pot with large lumps of animals sticking out*... *a human hand pops out and starts grasping around*... *smashes the hand back into the pot*...
2009-08-24 [Ninja Smurf]: heeeyyyy... anyone seen pedro?
2009-08-24 [the wonderfall-man]: *goes to the animal pot and takes a opend lion's skull and eats some of the soup with it* thats some good stuff right there...
2009-08-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *quickly sews Tekkon's hand back on and gives him fresh blood transfusions*
2009-08-25 [Ninja Smurf]: uh oh... I think pedro may be in the soup
2009-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Who's this Pedro...? I've certainly never heard of any Pedro. ...*smacks another hand back into the pot*...
2009-08-25 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *wakes up* the pedro i slapped with tuna? You mean i can't slap him with tuna anymore? *gives mort the tuna and whispers* slap him for me if his hand comes out again*
2009-08-25 [Alexi Ice]: Finally back.
2009-08-25 [Ninja Smurf]: uh-oh
2009-08-25 [Alexi Ice]: Hey! What's that supposed to mean?
2009-08-25 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *dives under table* yah... whats that supposed to mean?
2009-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: !! ...*glances around*... *slowly peels a banana*...
2009-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...RRRAAAAAHH!!! ...*snaps the banana in half*... NOW LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE!! *choke slams Tekkon KinKreet*
2009-08-25 [Alexi Ice]: Why don't I ever get assulted at Bobs Diner anymore? Am I not special or something?
2009-08-25 [Nekko fox]: *Violently cudgels [Alexi Ice] in the face with a frozen mackerel, it's gleaming edges studded with herring heads*


WE DO NOT TAKE REQUESTS HERE!
2009-08-25 [Fallen Child Athena]:    >.>.....Wow
2009-08-25 [Alexi Ice]: Awesome. Thanks.
2009-08-25 [Nekko fox]: Anytime.


*smack*
2009-08-25 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *gets up* hey banana *eats banana*
2009-08-26 [CrystalBlaze]: *walks in* y every one hit it be silly
2009-08-26 [Alexi Ice]: Question! What does Bobs Diner do when it comanderes a WIKI from someone?
2009-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: We puts it in the 'Conquered' section? ...also some standard pillaging and raping...
2009-08-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: oooh, can i pillage and rape?!? *gets out pillage and rape hat*
2009-08-26 [Nekko fox]: I keep forgetting that...It's pillage THEN burn....
2009-08-26 [Flisky]: That's an important distinction....
2009-08-26 [Nekko fox]: Ever try to pillage a burning chair? Difficult, though I saw Skormir do it before. We need to stop having him lead the raids....
2009-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably... I'm not too big a fan of his "burn first, rape second" method...
2009-08-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: yah... its kinda... messy...
2009-08-26 [Araglas]: wow
2009-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: EW!
2009-08-27 [Ninja Smurf]: sounds a little crispy.
2009-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah.
2009-08-27 [Flisky]: I'm not sure whether to laugh evilly or be mortified....
2009-08-27 [Duke Devlin]: *bludgens nearest person with a baseball bat* ..... Oh... Sorry Flisk. =3
2009-08-27 [Flisky]: *grabs bat and takes out Duke's knees* You people still haven't learned to not threaten me or mine with baseball bats?
2009-08-27 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *holds up frozen tuna* what about with tuna?
2009-08-27 [Ninja Smurf]: wow..
gotta love this place, dinner and a violent show.. *eats penguins ramen*
2009-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: MY RAMEN!!! ...*headbutts Flisk_girl for no reason*... *collapses*...
2009-08-28 [Flisky]: *stares at Mort* What the... *turns to Tekkon* I'm allergic to that. Put it away before I have to Epipen you!
2009-08-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~snikers~
2009-08-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: Epipen away! *goes all gun ho with tuna*
2009-08-28 [Ninja Smurf]: what the hell is epipen? *eats morts ramen*
2009-08-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: thats why i went all gung ho, i want to find out. lol its probably not good, but i will endure IN THE NAME OF SCIENCE!!!!! *strikes super hero pose*
2009-08-28 [Flisky]: *stabs Tekkon with the epipen* It's an emergency dose of epinephrin (sp?) that is a heavy duty anti-histamine and anti-allergen. It also tends to make people not used to it quite sleepy. *grins manically*
2009-08-28 [Duke Devlin]: *locates her trusty shotgun* Time fer me to take out some of these here resi-dents... *shoots Flisk's feet, and Jerry's hands - for stealing Mort's ramen*
2009-08-28 [Duke Devlin]: Also, JC, that contest ended AGES ago. XD
2009-08-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *starts to get really sleepy* ok, but, in the name of science, are you going to do horrible things to me while i'm sleeping?
2009-08-28 [Flisky]: *ignores the gunshots and grins evilly at Tekkon* Maaaaybe...
2009-08-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: oh... ok then... *passes out*
2009-08-28 [Ninja Smurf]: *sticks chop sticks in bloody stumps and eats morts ramen* mm.. i thought epinephrin was artificial addrenalin... hmm..
2009-08-28 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-08-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *hops up after getting over his near fatal heart attack from too much adrenaline and runs over stealing temples coin while giggling insanely and yelling* red bull, gotta red bull, wanna share a red bull, RED BULL!
2009-08-28 [Thunder Cid]: http://www.ustream.tv/channel/cids-weekly-feed
2009-08-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: the feed.... eating stew... lmao. nice touch
2009-08-28 [Thunder Cid]: Appricate it. Youl can check me out tonight at 8 eastern.
2009-08-29 [Duke Devlin]: Sure am, Tekkon. :) Though I didn't tell this lot about it. ;D
2009-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Check you out eh Cid?
2009-08-29 [CrystalBlaze]: holly coments
2009-08-29 [Ukia]: *blinks* I'm lost again with regards to the conversation. 
2009-08-29 [CrystalBlaze]: oooooo how KIWI
2009-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's ok to be lost.
2009-08-29 [CrystalBlaze]: how me kitten doing me want know. Me want kitty
2009-08-29 [Ukia]: Kiwikins be fine. Go into heat several times, think she be currently in heat, meow head off, attack Peanut Butter many times, attack other girls several times, walk on me often, get places she not supposed to be, meow some more, sleep in strange places, try to take my lap from me. You know, the usual. 
2009-08-29 [CrystalBlaze]: hehehehe good kiwi we need spade them no more meow in heat
2009-08-29 [Ukia]: Or find tom cat to make Kiwi shut up and Beauty calm down. Me like kittens. Me also had strange dream involving a tom cat coming to our home. Not remember much else, but it feel like one of those dreams I get that come true. 
2009-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: You want kitty, I have 24 what color you want?
2009-08-29 [CrystalBlaze]: no we no need kitten though they cute. and to Amebara me take gery and black kitty
2009-08-29 [Ukia]: We have gray and black kitties. They be Kiwi, Beauty, and Simone. We need variety in kitty colors, like orange or calico. 
2009-08-29 [CrystalBlaze]: fine give me orange
2009-08-29 [Duke Devlin]: Oh the atrocities!
2009-08-29 [Ukia]: Eh? Now what's wrong with you? 
2009-08-29 [Duke Devlin]: Nothing, I just like to exclaim random words here.
And what do you mean, 'Now'? -.-
2009-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have calicos.
2009-08-29 [Tekkon KinKreet]: she means now, cuz there is always something wrong here... *points out man with chopstick arms*
2009-08-29 [Ninja Smurf]: *waves*
2009-08-29 [Nekko fox]: *God kills Joker*
2009-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: NO DON'T KILL JERRY!
2009-08-30 [Ninja Smurf]: *rises from dead* Bad god! *kills god* take that... *dances*
2009-08-30 God: How many times will you mortals try killing me before you learn?! ...I re-spawn in three days, fool!
2009-08-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh Jeez.
2009-08-30 [Tekkon KinKreet]: .... who posted that.... lmao
2009-08-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: It was probably Mort he does that.
2009-08-30 [Tekkon KinKreet]: ah... mort playing god.... hmmmmm... *visions of world ending* and there will be a flood of ramen....
2009-08-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-08-30 [Ninja Smurf]: umm... you can't be god... since it was only a few minutes since i killed him... not days...
2009-08-30 [twitchboy]: God cant be killed cause Billy mays just sold him another body to inhabit
2009-08-30 [Nekko fox]: Dammit Billy Maes!
2009-08-30 [Ninja Smurf]: oh what the hell...
2009-08-31 [Thunder Cid]: Billy Mayes divides by zero.
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: That's only because he's been injecting Oxyclean...
2009-08-31 [Flisky]: That sounds painful.
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes... yes it is. Some people think that may be what killed him... but I'm still unconvinced that it even does any damage at all... *injects Oxyclean*... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, this year's friscal report is out. It's up there in the wiki if you want to re- HHHHHHNNNNNNNGGGGGHHH!! MY HEART!!!! *collapses*... *starts flopping around*... damn you, Oxyclean!
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, and *stops flopping momentarily* the average number of comments a day for 08/09 was 11.797399041752224503764544832307... *resumes flopping*... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-31 [Flisky]: *pokes Mort with long pole* Um...maybe that was a bad idea. You aren't Billy Mayes!
2009-08-31 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hmmm... maybe he is and he's trying to trick us? I smell a conspiracy theory!
2009-08-31 [twitchboy]: billy mays once sold crack to mother taresa
billy mays sold twilight on tape to helen keller
billy mays talked michael vick into buying a peta membership
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Horrifyingly true.
2009-08-31 [Tekkon KinKreet]: oh god... you mean... the world is more fucked up than bobs diner? my illusions are shattered.... 0_o
2009-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Bob's Diner food made me have crazy dreams about B-movie SF stuff on really cheesy 1970s-era TV action shows. Damn yooooou! *shakes fist*
2009-08-31 [Flisky]: Nothing is more F'ed up then Bob's Diner.
2009-08-31 [Tekkon KinKreet]: whew.. my illusions are returned... and i feel secure again... flisk you are a hero
2009-08-31 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear, I must say that I am rather disappointed by the low comment count. =/ SAD TIMESSSS.
2009-08-31 [Ninja Smurf]: i dunno flisk... take a look at my life... makes the diner here seem almost.. umm.. tame..
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Jesus hates me
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: This I Know
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Cuz Diablo
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Told me so
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Angel, angel go away
Come again another day
The Devil has my ear today
I'll never hear a word you say.
2009-08-31 [Nekko fox]: There, six comments. All of them of blinding worth.
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: He's right! They are blinding! ...*pretends to be blind*... *gropes Duke's chest*... *eats ramen*...
2009-08-31 [Flisky]: *stares at Mort eating ramen from Duke's chest*
2009-08-31 [Tekkon KinKreet]: 0_o.... i think... umm... wow i dunno what to think
2009-08-31 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: Sooo


Whats the crack???


Any fucker on FaceBook??
2009-08-31 [Alexi Ice]: Six comments? We need six? OOOOOKKKKK. I can do six.


Let's see. The reality of life is deplorable.
2009-08-31 [Alexi Ice]: You can't spell racecar without car.
2009-08-31 [Alexi Ice]: 2 rabies walk into a bar...nevermind. I forgot the punchline anyway.
2009-08-31 [Alexi Ice]: 
2009-08-31 [Alexi Ice]: 
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Whites: It isn't a race... We've already won.
2009-08-31 [Alexi Ice]:   


Doesn't this just inspire you? Now go out and fail. Preferably here at Bob's Diner. Lol.
2009-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Okay, so I'm not actually white... Shut up!! ...*eats tacos*... *wears a sombrero*... *sells oranges*...
2009-08-31 [Duke Devlin]: You can't grope me! :O *flails*
2009-08-31 [twitchboy]: heres a twenty can i grope you now duke?
2009-09-01 [Flisky]: *steals Mort's sombrero and does a Mexican Hat Dance*
2009-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: My hat!! What have you don- *explodes*
2009-09-01 [Flisky]: *continues the Mexican hat dance through the rubble*
2009-09-01 [Young J.C.]: So, who won in the banner contest?
2009-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm gonna say... you. ...*eats ramen*...
2009-09-01 [Young J.C.]: If your word counts, then cool.
2009-09-02 [Ninja Smurf]: hey.. I thought I won!
2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: You win nothing! Ptewie! *spits on Misty*
2009-09-02 [Flisky]: *pulls out some castanets. Continues dancing*
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: HIIII!!!!!!!!!! mort told me i should post, so here i am^_^ commenting^_^ whats shakin yall??
2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: The floor... not sure why, though... *goes back to genetically engineering giant lizards*... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*dumps off radioactive lizards in Tokyo*...
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: *watches while sittiing in a corner...*
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort is a bomb head.
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort,
  

2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what the hell is a Texas...? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: lol....love it>.<
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Texas is a state.
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2009-09-02 [Fallen Child Athena]: lol Cant fix Mort with Duct Tape xD
2009-09-02 [Flisky]: Could probably fix his mouth for a little while, anyway.
2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats duct tape*...
2009-09-02 [Nekko fox]: *Eats A few of the commenters...he gets indigestion and gets violently sick, and you all return to the floor, though differently scented than before, and slightly more damp. Except for Mort. He's fine. No one knows why. Questions will not be asked*
2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *asks a question*
2009-09-02 [Nekko fox]: *SUPER ANGRY TABLE FLIP!*




SHUT THE FUCK UP! NO QUESTIONS!
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: *goes and sits in a corner somewhere...curls up and rocks back and forth*
2009-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: TABLE, NOOOOOO!!! ...*holds the broken table in my arms*... I remember when you were just a tree! Don't die, buddy! ...*grows bored*... *tosses table away*... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-02 [Ninja Smurf]: hmm... *scratches head* this isn't what i ordered.... *shrugs and steals morts ramen again**eatsmorts ramen*
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: I wouldn't eat that ramen if I were you.
2009-09-02 [the wonderfall-man]: why not? i did it once and nothing happend to me yet.
2009-09-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: wait for it *evil laugh*
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, you just wait it'll eat you from the inside out.
2009-09-02 [the wonderfall-man]: i craped it out already...
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: ........i dont think i want any ramen anymore....
2009-09-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: oh... other ramen is ok... just not mort's.... ^^
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol it's only Mort's ramen, unless you are Mort it'll leave a little "friend" inside you, and there is but one cure.
2009-09-02 [the wonderfall-man]: it looked like long pasta like corn covered in crap like i didnt evan chew it...
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: ....ok......whats the cure??? just in case i get hungry and morts the only oe around.....
2009-09-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol only Mort has the cure.
2009-09-02 [Aquariuscelesti a]: uhhoh...........then im doomed..........oh well*sighs*
2009-09-02 [the wonderfall-man]: or is there no cure at all. *starts eating ramen next to Mort*
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: hehehe Mort is the cure, but he's dirty. lol
2009-09-03 [the wonderfall-man]: *takes out a carving nife and a butsher nife ans starting to sharpen them* Were is a nice juicy place. *smiles at mort looking at him for the best place to carf him up* It'll only be about the size of his leg...
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey, I was just kidding, you'll be fine, but that ramen isn't healthy he's dropped it on the floor many times.
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: ok...ill just stay away from the ramen then....*moves to the other side of the room
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: *looks up* what? theres ramen over there......and i dont wanna eat mort...i dont think hed taste very good>.<
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's ok.
2009-09-03 [Viking]: Maybe he'd taste good with some kung pao sauce.
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *couch*
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: hmmmmmm.........maybe......... but still *looks at mort* i think not....
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Couch??
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *couchcouch*
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: couch yummy?????? im hungry>.<
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands you a burger*
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *spits on the burger!*
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: Hey!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *sniffle*
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's not nice Mort, please don't spit on peoples food.
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: Please????
2009-09-03 [Chimes]: It adds flavour.
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: But mort tastes funny..........
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, well you look funny! ...unlike clowns... they look creepy... *eats ramen*... *a gruesome, hideous looking clown glares in through my window*... darn it Misty, get away from my window! *hurls a boot at Misty's face*
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not near your window.
2009-09-03 [Paul Doyle]: New yum-yums, served up here at Bob's Diner. It may LOOK like strawberry soft-serve ice cream, but do note this stuff isn't frozen. Diner patrons, beware! Mwahaha
  

2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: .......thanks......I enjoy looking funny
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: If it's not strawberry soft-serve ice cream then what is it?
2009-09-03 [Paul Doyle]: Accessing the "properties" like a good computer nerd, will give you a hint ;-)
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh?
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: You mean the picture's properties, it says http://www.fooducate.com/blog/wp-content/media/Mechanically%20Separated%20Chicken
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Derp... is it cheesecake? ...derp derp... *eats ramen*... derp...
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: IM EATING CHEESECAKE!!!!! nummy.....
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gasps* I want some!
2009-09-03 [Aquariuscelesti a]: EWWWWWWW..........mechanically separated chicken??? *drops cheesecake......*
2009-09-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-09-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-09-03 [Paul Doyle]: Wait till you read about how the chicken is mechanically separated. If you think robotic arms separate the wings and drumsticks, keep dreaming and be thankful ignorance is bliss.
2009-09-03 [Viking]: Did you know that the unit of measurement for mechanical chicken separators is known as the "kilofowl"?
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Nice picture of Misty you got there, Nekko.
2009-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Here's Misty as a child...


  

2009-09-03 [Paul Doyle]: It's really called "kilofowl"? xD
2009-09-03 [Viking]: You think I'd make something like that up?
2009-09-03 [Paul Doyle]: No, but that's just such a fitting term I couldn't help but laugh a bit.
2009-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I was a skinny child, I got fat after I had my appendix taken out.
2009-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I assume you were forced to stay in bed while you healed and then you grew accustomed to that lifestyle...? ...*eats appendix*...
2009-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, I was put on bedrest, and my mom gave me grape juice and anything I wanted so yeah.
2009-09-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...yeah... that grapejuice'll do that to you... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I said she gave me grape juice and anything else I wanted, and she gave me sweets.
2009-09-04 [Paul Doyle]: Did she give you mechanically separated chicken, too? :P
2009-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: No.
2009-09-04 [Paul Doyle]: Now that's a responsible mother! :D
2009-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah I guess.
2009-09-04 [Nekko fox]: Liar, that would have kept her in shape!
2009-09-04 [Nekko fox]: Constantly vomiting up chicken chunks, it keeps the abdominal muscles shaped and toned!
2009-09-04 [Nekko fox]: Your mother should be deeply ashamed of herself. Forever.
2009-09-04 [Ninja Smurf]: hmmm...
now i want to go eat chicken...
2009-09-04 [Duke Devlin]: Misty: Truly I feel sorry for you. =/ Nekko is right; your mother should be ashamed. =/
2009-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, I know but she isn't she did the same thing to my brother when he got his tonsils taken out.
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: oooooh cold ice cream on sore tonsils... good stuff... *eats ice cream* mmmm chocolate chunk.
2009-09-05 [Alexi Ice]: Lalala...i havn't been here in long enough to know whats going on. What's wrong with Misty?


Oh *Just read back through the comments* My mom got her appendix taken out...>>


I have Strep *Breaths on everyone but Duke and Misty* *Laughs* ^^
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *laughs* i'm imune.. haha you're evil plan has been foiled. *super hero pose*
2009-09-05 [Alexi Ice]: Damn. I was really just aiming for Mort, anyway. LOL.
2009-09-05 [Aquariuscelesti a]: BUT I DONT WANNA GET SICK!!!!!!
2009-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Mental disorder... *eats ramen*... (in response to What's wrong with Misty?)
2009-09-05 [Alexi Ice]: I didn't either...LOL.
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i think i'd make a good super hero... wearing tights and stuff... and a cape...
2009-09-05 [Flisky]: *is blinded by the mental image*
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: ...... is it that bad?.... TT_TT
2009-09-05 [Flisky]: Lets see, trying to eat while not imagine mechanically separated chicken, removed appendices, and Tekkon in tights. Yeah, that will make you either sick or blind. *blinks*
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: lmao... so its more the chicken and appendices tho right?
2009-09-05 [Flisky]: Yeah. (Nursing student. I actually know what a removed appendix looks like. *gags slightly*)
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: whew... i was worried for a minute... but i see now that there's still hope for me and tights. lmao... which color do you think? red or blue? oh oh oh or whiiiiiiiiiiite.
2009-09-05 [Aquariuscelesti a]: RED!!


.......what are we talkin about???O.o
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: the tights i'm going to wear when i'm a super hero... ^^
2009-09-05 [Aquariuscelesti a]: oh...................yea.....................still.....................RED!^_^
2009-09-05 [Aquariuscelesti a]: wait...who are you??? im rosemarie^_^ nice to meet ya^_^
2009-09-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: My friend Adam did some funn videos as a super hero named Faithman he wore red tights a pink shirt with his logo on it a red cap and red boxers over the tights, it was funny.
2009-09-05 [Ninja Smurf]: tek: tights are out, sorry bud, but at the last super secret super hero meeting we voted that they are soooo out of style.
2009-09-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Tights are not out, I was there.
2009-09-05 [Alexi Ice]: It was a church thing I guess, Misty.
2009-09-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol You talking about Faith Man?
2009-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.27bslash6.com/overdue.html
2009-09-05 [Alexi Ice]: Yes.
2009-09-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh yes it was, but it was funny.
2009-09-05 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha I love how we don't get breathed on. XD
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: wait... tights are out... my world is shattered....TT_TT
2009-09-05 [Nekko fox]: Tights are fail.
2009-09-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: nooooooooooooooooooooooo damn thee, constantly changing trends!! *Dramatically shakes fist at the air*
2009-09-05 [Ninja Smurf]: They decided that as soon as tek wore somthing, it was to be deemed "unfashinable"
2009-09-05 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~blows up tha diner~
2009-09-05 [Young J.C.]: What a dick. Blowing the diner up.
2009-09-05 [Ninja Smurf]: well, there were some very serious health code violations...
2009-09-05 [Young J.C.]: Oppose to what? With all the finger licking good, finger strips and items like that?
2009-09-05 [Viking]: It was the sex in the kitchen that did it. No one knew exactly what "special spices" were in the food after that.
2009-09-05 [Young J.C.]: You know, I was just happy thinking that was slime from a snail. lol
2009-09-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok ew!
2009-09-05 [Young J.C.]: Sorry, I get a little carried away with my jokes.
2009-09-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: It's ok.
2009-09-06 [Duke Devlin]: Boaarrr-ed. *blows up Bob's Diner remains*
2009-09-06 [Alexi Ice]: Lol. Same here. Ugh.
2009-09-06 [Chimes]: Now all that remains is this... *hold's up the 'B' from the sign*
2009-09-06 [Ninja Smurf]: *rebuilds diner, ads anti-blowing-up shield made from mechanically seperated chicken and "snail" glue*
2009-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: It was slime from a snail... a giant, mutated, sexually aroused snail that was having sex with our waitresses...
2009-09-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: ........
2009-09-06 [Ninja Smurf]: wait.. umm.. mort.. aren't you the waitress?
2009-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Only on Thursdays through Wednesdays...
2009-09-06 [Flisky]: *stares as the diner is blown up then rebuilt around her* I'm glad I'm impervious to all of this.
2009-09-06 [twitchboy]: what was that like the eightieth time bobs has been destroyed?
2009-09-06 [Flisky]: *tries to count on fingers and has to grow extra ones* I'm not sure.
2009-09-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~cocks an eyebrow~ Wow.....
2009-09-07 [twitchboy]: i lost count on my fingers and toes so i started counting in inches with my penis
2009-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: And once both of those ran out, he had to use mine. The total came to about 2,363,743,324.7...
2009-09-07 [twitchboy]: i love it mort lol
2009-09-07 [Flisky]: Where did the .7 come from?
2009-09-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: the part that got cut off in a horrific machining accident... wait... what are we talking about?
2009-09-07 [Viking]: I think that was due to a circumcision.
2009-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: You callin' me a Jew, boy?!
2009-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *whips out some grotesque, drooping foreskin*
2009-09-07 [Viking]: Then perhaps it was a machining accident...But I don't want to know what you were doing with the machine.
2009-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I ended up getting electro-gonorrhea... the noisy killer.
2009-09-07 [Ninja Smurf]: simple answer guys, he's spent so long at bobs diner that he has 2,363,743,324 fingers...
2009-09-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: whoah... I WANT MORE FINGERS DAMN IT!!!
2009-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: So did your mom!
2009-09-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: wait... you have how many fingers????? 0_o
2009-09-07 [Ninja Smurf]: Mort, thts only cus your fingers are so short and skinny, and covered in snail slime
2009-09-07 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~falls over laughing~ Oh damn xD
2009-09-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol funny.
2009-09-08 [Alexi Ice]: ^^
2009-09-08 [Tekkon KinKreet]: now wait a minute... are you calling my mother a snail????
2009-09-08 [Tekkon KinKreet]: cuz honestly... she's more of a snake...
2009-09-08 [Nekko fox]: The Game.
2009-09-08 [Paul Doyle]: Then there's always the infamous Taco Bell meat hose. Somehow machine-operated food processing, decapitation, dismemberment, cockroaches and Taco Bell are inextricably linked. No wonder why Tito's Tacos Cantina in Middletown, RI survived and became better well-known after a Taco Bell opened right next door to it, back around 1993.
2009-09-08 [Paul Doyle]: http://www.titos.com/
2009-09-08 [Nekko fox]: What's in this epic
FRIGGIN'
PIE?!
2009-09-08 [Alexi Ice]: Crack.
2009-09-08 [Paul Doyle]: Sweeney Todd????
2009-09-08 [Nekko fox]: SWEENEY TOD'S CRACK?!
2009-09-08 [Paul Doyle]: He's the Demon Barber of Fleet Street . . . with a twist?
2009-09-08 [Ninja Smurf]: dammit I lost the game.....
2009-09-08 [Pillowthief]: Bogus, again.


Damn you Complimentary Third Column! *shakes fist*
2009-09-08 [hammersmashface]: yes ill have a number 30 from the lunch menu
2009-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sorry, it appears we're all out of nothing... we'll have to restock.
2009-09-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok
2009-09-08 [Ninja Smurf]: haha... I have brought the evilness of the game to the diner.. mwhahahaha I Lost the Game and now you shall too
2009-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: The Game is cancerous and only participated in by newfags... *eats ramen*... GAH.
2009-09-08 [hammersmashface]: i think bobs diner should compensate me with something equal or more value...
2009-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner will spit on you! *the sprinkler system goes off*
2009-09-08 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~steals Mort's ramen and throws it out the window~
2009-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls a rope that drops Vearichan down into Misty's feeding pit*... *the great behemoth slowly rises and starts crawling toward Vearichan menacingly*...
2009-09-09 [hammersmashface]: O.O x.x O.O  ummm ill take my order to go!
2009-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *glomps Vearichan and huggles her* I luffles my sister!
2009-09-09 [Alexi Ice]: LOL.
2009-09-09 [Ninja Smurf]: Mort... your the one who wanted me to tell everyone, so you could share your feelings... remember?
2009-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: hehehe
2009-09-09 [hammersmashface]: wait...mort has feelings? when did this happen? what did i miss
2009-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: No idea.
2009-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Feelings... of rage! ...*chokes a chicken*... heh... chicken... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: CHOKES! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! *runs*
2009-09-09 [Ninja Smurf]: mort gets jealous cus the snail wants the whole feather thing so he takes it out on the chicken.
2009-09-09 [Alexi Ice]: > *Hungry* *Steals Ramen* *throws it*
2009-09-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *steals a box of penguin ramen, puts it in a box, wraps the box, and sends it to Mort*
2009-09-10 [Flisky]: *intercepts box, adds some more ramen, sends box on it's way*
2009-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What the **** is this?! ...I didn't order any ******* box!! ...*hurls the box into a building*... *the building blows up*...
2009-09-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs as ramen falls from the sky*
2009-09-10 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i think mort's biggest dream just came true... rainin ramen
2009-09-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh yeah.
2009-09-10 [silverraven66699]: *hides under bed* Wow, now I have seen everything... I can mark off, "See it rain ramen.", from my list.. lol
2009-09-10 [CrystalBlaze]: hello me back again
2009-09-10 [Ninja Smurf]: you were gone?
2009-09-10 [Tekkon KinKreet]: did you bring a souvenir straight jacket??? i've always wanted to try one on...
2009-09-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-09-11 [Artsieladie]: Just adding a comment.... ;)
2009-09-11 [Alexi Ice]: That would be SOOOOO yummy!

I want some of this!
2009-09-11 [hammersmashface]: no thank you! and what in the bob's diner is that burnt thing?? and that pink swirrly thingy
2009-09-11 [Viking]: The pink swirly thing is a bit of handsoap, I believe. It has a strawberries and cream scent.
2009-09-11 [hammersmashface]: are...are you sposta eat it??
2009-09-11 [Viking]: No, you're just supposed to wash your mouth out with it. The dish leaves a rather rancid taste in your mouth. I have heard that college kids have started a bit of tradition of eating the soap, though. I bet that usually happens at 4 am when the get the munchies and have a bite to eat.
2009-09-11 [Aliz]: *randomly stumbled in* That...does look yummy O.o
2009-09-11 [Viking]: Even the soap? 0__o
2009-09-11 [Aliz]: ...
yes >.>
2009-09-11 [Alexi Ice]: The burnt this is sea weed <3 LOL.
 IDK about the swirly thing...but it's in most Ramen so it must be good.
2009-09-11 [Ukia]: I be confused again.
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: eh yuk it looks groose
2009-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Spiral fishcakes are gross... they taste fishy... *eats good ol' fashioned 33 cent bargain ramen*...
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: well duh spiral fishcakes are fish. and penguins eat fish
2009-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a fish!
2009-09-11 [Paul Doyle]: Let me get the mechanically separated chicken . . . by the kilofowl . . .
2009-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Jerk. Don't comment at the same time as me...
2009-09-11 [Paul Doyle]:   


nom nom nom de nom nom nom . . .
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: what is that? yogurt, icecream, what
2009-09-11 [Paul Doyle]: Here we go again . . . o__O
2009-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: It's cheesecake, dangit!
2009-09-11 [Ukia]: Cheesecake? Mass-produced cheesecake, maybe?
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: ooo it just looks different that all it does look yummy
2009-09-11 [Viking]: C'mon, folks...It's Mechanically Separated Chicken! It looks like about .07 kilofowl in that box there.
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: lol if penguin says it be cheesecake then me believe.
2009-09-11 [Ukia]: Same here. 
2009-09-11 [Viking]: Chicken Cheesecake, perhaps...
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: it still look good
2009-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet, sweet cheesecake... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: me wish me had ramen
2009-09-11 [Ukia]: Cake soon.
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: yeah me hungy
2009-09-11 [Ukia]: Me get off. 
2009-09-11 [CrystalBlaze]: me falling sleep
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why are you saying Me get off and Me falling sleep, it's weird.
2009-09-12 [Viking]: I thought the "Me get off" was especially creepy considering the previous comments...
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh?
2009-09-12 [Tekkon KinKreet]: lmao... go ahead and get off... just... we don't really wanna know... or see..
2009-09-12 [Ninja Smurf]: or talk about it... please.. no...
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: I had to get off Elftown and the computer to take care of a cake. CrystalBlaze said she's sleepy because she gets sleepy when the sun goes down. We're both dragons and share living quarters, thank you, and . . . . 


And my brain forgot what I was going to say.
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, ok then.
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: Less confused, now? 
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yepper doodles!
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: You make me hungry when you say 'doodles'. And I really don't need to eat any more Quick After-Battle Triple Chocolate Cake, even though it's addictive and chocolatey and delicious. *mmmmm* 
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've never had any.
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: I can always give you the recipe by messaging it to you. 
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I can't cook.
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: It's not a difficult recipe to follow. If a barbarian swordsman can follow it, pretty much anyone can. 
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well I could give it a try.
2009-09-12 [Ninja Smurf]: mmm.. cake...
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love cake.
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: I sent you the recipe. I suppose I could make a wiki for it so other people could write it done and try it out. It is ssooo good, it's like there's this compulsion to eat as much as you can. Mmmm! *drools*
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I like chocolate swirl cheesecake.
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: I like that, too. *drools some more* *looks at puddle of dragon dribble* Oh, dear, I make a mess. Someone might slip. *puts up ''wet floor" signs*
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *mops up your drool*
2009-09-12 [Ukia]: Why mop it up? It's not your job is it? 
2009-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, but I don't want anyone to fall.
2009-09-12 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-09-13 [Fallen Child Athena]: O_O
2009-09-13 [CrystalBlaze]: hello lots going on here
2009-09-13 [Ninja Smurf]: shhh it's become silent.. don't wake the diner.. it might eat yo
2009-09-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKEEEE UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2009-09-13 [Alexi Ice]: *YAWN*
2009-09-13 [hammersmashface]: plz stop yawning all over my screen thank you! :)
2009-09-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pokes your screen with a pole*
2009-09-13 [hammersmashface]: and i dont like my screen poked with poles...any kinda poles...
2009-09-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *smacks screen with tuna* tuna?
2009-09-13 [CrystalBlaze]: y smack screen with fish
2009-09-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: dunno... something to do?
2009-09-13 [Alexi Ice]: Yummmm...Love Tuna...
2009-09-13 [hammersmashface]: tuna burgers!!! but now my screen smells fishy...i blaim Mort!
2009-09-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: mwa hahahahahaha and the guilty party goes free... score!
2009-09-13 [Ninja Smurf]: I blame tek... after all he's the bastard son of mort...
2009-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: True, true... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-14 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-09-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: .... that was supposed to be a secret dammit....
2009-09-14 [Alexi Ice]: *Sneezes in Morts ramen.* Lol..
2009-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*continues eating ramen*...
2009-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! ...them's some mighty fine lookin' kneecaps you got there, Akane Ice... *clutches a baseball bat*...
2009-09-14 [Alexi Ice]: Come at me *Grabs fake sword*
2009-09-14 [Ninja Smurf]: wow.. I am taking bets on the akane vs mort battle royal...
2009-09-14 [Alexi Ice]: Lol. I enjoy the fact that I didn't get hit immediatly, just threatened.
2009-09-14 [Ninja Smurf]: you scare mort, thats why..
2009-09-14 [Alexi Ice]: Do I scare YOU?
2009-09-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: my money's on mort.... you know... being his bastard son and all...
2009-09-14 [Ninja Smurf]: no akane, your pussy cat... and i traded a vampire puppy for you.. hehe




bastard sons aren't alowed to bet.... they just get beat in the corner.
2009-09-14 [Alexi Ice]: In that case, Meow. *wink*
2009-09-14 [Pillowthief]: Sooo... to sum up all the comments from my last one...


Bob's Diner is currently out of Nothing, except you can get it next door at The Game, which is designed to P'wn everyone, all the time. [Fallen Child Athena] didn't get eaten (surprisingly) for throwing some ramen out a window, directly contributing to it miraculiously raining penguin ramen. [CrystalBlaze] is a fish (YOURE a cigarette!) and [Paul Doyle] is a kilofowl mechanically separated chicken ordering jerk. Soap is a fishcake, cheesecake is supposed to be chicken. [CrystalBlaze] was hungry so [Ukia] got off, afterwards [CrystalBlaze] fell asleep- not to mention Mort choking his own chicken 40 comments back. No excuse for Mort, but both [CrystalBlaze] and [Ukia] are lesbian dragons that live together, so its Ok. [Alexi Ice] is a tuna-loving pussy and [Tekkon KinKreet] is Mort's illigetimate son who's going to get beat in the corner by [Ninja Smurf], who just lost The Game, again.


*wipes sweat off of brow* Whoo. I think thats about it. Oh yeah-


The cake is a lie.
2009-09-14 [Ninja Smurf]: dammit.. now i lost the game agian... grrrr..
2009-09-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: ha haaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!
2009-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, that pretty much sums it up... except for the part where I killed you! WHA HA HA HAA- oh, wait... I never killed you...... yet... *eats ramen*... (You're a cigarette!)
2009-09-15 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-09-15 [Olwen]: mmmmm cigarettes
2009-09-15 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: :P  YAY! I've been gone from ET for like 3yrs... so i dunno who in here mightve given me a join invite, but thanks!
2009-09-15 [Paul Doyle]: [Pillowthief] is the Assistant to the Godhead's Assistant Assistant . . . and it turns out the #1 ingredient in my son's Wal-Mart hot dogs is mechanically separated chicken. o__O
2009-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: You mean cheesecake? ...I heard cheesecake makes delicious hotdogs...
2009-09-15 [Alexi Ice]: ?
2009-09-15 [Ninja Smurf]: hmmm...
2009-09-16 [hammersmashface]: i feel like i dont have a clue, on whats going on!
2009-09-16 [Tekkon KinKreet]: cheesecake, cigarettes, and mechanically separated chicken makes a tasty dish, apparently.
2009-09-16 [Ninja Smurf]: well ya... didn't you know that?
2009-09-16 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i do noooooooowwwwwwwwww.... *feels left out*
2009-09-16 [Paul Doyle]: Redneck "Five Food Groups": Wonder Bread, Velveeta, Spam, Possum, Moonshine.
2009-09-16 [Tekkon KinKreet]: 'shine for everyone!!!!
2009-09-16 [hammersmashface]:  MOOOOOOONSHINE!
2009-09-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Only half as good as sunshine... *chugs a glass of sunshine*... *gets kidney burns*...
2009-09-16 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-09-16 [CrystalBlaze]: me missed out here me see
2009-09-16 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *smells shine and falls over* strong stuff...
2009-09-16 [Ninja Smurf]: *kills day ball* haha no more sun mwhahahaha! Go nightball go!!
2009-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Why are there no comments today?!
2009-09-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: eh.... everyone is tired?
2009-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: You lie!
2009-09-17 [hammersmashface]: no the real question is why is there a big gap in the drings menu...
2009-09-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: invisible foods section?
2009-09-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: they're so invisible you can't even see them on the menu
2009-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: There. The big gap issue has been solved... I will now take my three week, paid vacation... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-18 [Ninja Smurf]: umm.. mort... we no longer pay you here...
2009-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wow I missed alot. *eats homemade chocolate swirl cheesecake* YUM!
2009-09-18 [hammersmashface]: :O you cant bring outside food into a Diner! im sure theres some kinda rule against that!! maybe you should share :D
2009-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gives you a slice of the homemade Chocolate swirl cheesecake* Here you are.
2009-09-18 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: dude...where's mine????
2009-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *hands Daemeon a slice too*
2009-09-18 [hammersmashface]:  Daemeon got moooore!
2009-09-18 [Ninja Smurf]: *gobbles all the homemade chocolate swirl cheesecake*... mmmm... *burps*
2009-09-18 [Ukia]: *ponders* Hmm, I be a dragon who likes cheesecake, and jokerjerry gobbled it all, so what do I do? *ponders some more* Snarf jokerjerry maybe? *ponders*
2009-09-18 [Ninja Smurf]: I is not good for dragons... very bad on digestion
2009-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gasps* JERRY! YOU ATE ALL OF MY CHEESECAKE! *sniffles and cries*
2009-09-19 [Ninja Smurf]: hehe.. saved a piece for you.. *pulls out cheesecake*
2009-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY! *takes and eats*
2009-09-19 [CrystalBlaze]: *walks in* hello all *goes and sit in corrner*
2009-09-19 [hammersmashface]: sorry that corner is for standing only! :P
2009-09-19 [Fallen Child Athena]: O.o........~eats pocky~
2009-09-19 [Ninja Smurf]: i don't knw if you would really want to sit anywhere in here... Mort's been slacking on his janitorial duties...
2009-09-20 [Nekko fox]: I'm God.
2009-09-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: ......
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, glad you could make it, big guy! ...I was having some trouble with the toilets out back and was wondering if you could unclog them? ...HA HA HAA! ...just kidding... of course you can! You're God! ...but, anyway... *hands Nekko a plunger*... tell me when you get done... I'll be on the roof, swatting at birds... *eats ramen*... *gets a rake*... *climbs up a ladder*...
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*hits the stomach of a passing pterodactyl with the rake*... *it screeches loudly and crashes into an elementary school*... *in its rage, it breaks down the doors and starts eating kindergartners*... whoa... that was a big pigeon... *resumes bird swatting*...
2009-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *watches Mort from a bush*
2009-09-20 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *stops swatting birds to watch a tree from the roof*
2009-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*watches the roof through the scope of a sniper rifle in a book depository*... *takes aim at Mort's head*...
2009-09-20 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses aside the plunger, throwing at Ichmel the Immigrant*
2009-09-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *watches Mort while smoking candy*
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I can't eat my ramen... my spoon is too big...


  

2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: My spoooooon is tooooo big! SERIOUSLY!! ...*breaks the spoon in half over Misty's head*... much better! ...*eats ramen with the spoon*...
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...silly me... you don't eat ramen with a spoon! ...*throws the spoon violently at Ichmel*... *eats ramen with hands*...
2009-09-20 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *puts out his joint, pulls out his wrist rocket, and shoots the spoon before it hits Ichmel...* dude.. throwin spoons in a diner...You'll put your eye out!!!
2009-09-20 [Nekko fox]: *Kills Ichmel. No justification is given*
2009-09-20 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: lmao....damn...*lights up his joint again* screw it... you try to save someone, and look what happens...oh well hakuna ma tata...
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ICHMEL, NOHOHOOOOOOOO!! ...he was my world! ...*grabs Misty*... You'll pay for this, beast! ...*throws Misty to the floor*... *the floor nearly breaks under the weight*...
2009-09-20 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: yeah... sure it does... and i bet it was cheap illegal labour that fixed it the last time, too, wasnt it? shouldve shelled out the dough for a GOOD floor, yo :P
2009-09-20 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: Oh, speaking of which, in the UK, right, they have this political party called the labour party... kindve an oxymoron, you think? I mean, i'm just sayin....
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: In the US they have a political party called the Democratic Party... kindve an oxymoron, because they support socialism instead of democracy...
2009-09-20 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: nah... I'm a democrat, and i'm ANTIsocial :P
2009-09-20 [Ninja Smurf]: wow..bobs diner and politics.. whoda thunk it?
2009-09-20 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: lmao *gives jokerjerry an NRA sticker* just show up at the next meeting... you'll get all the political talk you want...
2009-09-20 [CrystalBlaze]: hello
2009-09-20 [Ninja Smurf]: zane- I got kicked out... aparently wanting to blow EVERYthing up was too much even for them...
2009-09-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *hands joker a turban* then i think this may be more to your fitting.
2009-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! ...who took my turban?!
2009-09-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *hides in corner*
2009-09-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Join this, jerks:


http://www.points2shop.com/?ref=sagaciousturkey
2009-09-21 [Ninja Smurf]: tek- nahhh.. they have an agenda... i just like the boom's


*burns morts turban* umm.. turkey took it...
2009-09-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: lolol that is understandable... booms are very cool
2009-09-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-09-21 [hammersmashface]: i survived an abortion
2009-09-21 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: i survived being dropped on meh head 6 times... intentionally dropped, mind you....
2009-09-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: Wow......
2009-09-21 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: lmao i was only kidding... it was only 3 times :P
2009-09-21 [Fallen Child Athena]: ouch
2009-09-22 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: yeah, well... lifes a bitch, and then ya get a concussion...
2009-09-22 [hammersmashface]: yeah! arnt you glad the floor broke your fall, could have been worse!!
2009-09-22 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: well, its like bugs always says, its not the fall that kills ya its the sudden stop at the end...
2009-09-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: YEAH! Wait, what?!
2009-09-23 [Duke Devlin]: I have a crazy craving for chocolate. :( Anyone wanna mail me some? :D
2009-09-23 [Duke Devlin]: [hammersmashface]: Could HAVE been worse.
:P
2009-09-23 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: holy shit, Duke were you an english instructor or somethin??? :P
2009-09-23 [Flisky]: Yes! Grammar check!
2009-09-23 [hammersmashface]: is that now so better?? 
2009-09-23 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *drops the unholy F-Bomb...* what the FUCK?!?
2009-09-23 [Ninja Smurf]: woooowwwww.....
2009-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol You guys are fun.
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: <(^_^)> ...... <(^_^<) ...... (>^_^)> ..... *busts a serious move in this biznitch*
2009-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws a pie in your face and runs*
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: lmao *dances over to Misty and pinches her on da butt*
2009-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_o WHAT THE! *smacks you with a tuna*
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: lmao i likes da lil fishie...
2009-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: His name is Slappy! *slaps you with Slappy the Tuna*
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *gobbles Slappy up* damn, a little mayo, and that mightve been good... ;)
2009-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I prefer Tarter sauce. *smiles*
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: not on TUNA!!!!
2009-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2009-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_O HOLY CRAPOLA!
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: umm.... ok *runs and hides*
2009-09-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: is the tuna smiling???????
2009-09-24 [Ninja Smurf]: wouldn't you be?
2009-09-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: point taken..... lucky ass tuna....
2009-09-24 [twitchboy]: omg....i want to be that tuna, or the headband
2009-09-24 [Duke Devlin]: And yes, Daemeon, I am. ;D Except not. Nah, I'm taking a combined honours degree course in Journalism & English... So I shall attempt to be a grammar nazi here. I shall probably fail, but who cares?! :D
2009-09-24 [hammersmashface]: i do...you cannot "half ass" in Bob's diner
2009-09-24 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: well, in all seriousness, i wish you well on your endeavour to become a fascist... lofty goal, but somehow still achieveable :P and yet.... *darth vader voice* Join me, and together we can rule the galaxy as grammar nazi and son!!!
2009-09-24 [Ninja Smurf]: it scares me that the people in bobs might actually procreate..
2009-09-24 [Aliz]: Random, but funny;
The other day, I saw a school for taking drivers lisence called "Bob traffic school" XD
2009-09-25 [hammersmashface]: O.O the infestation has begun!
2009-09-25 [Aliz]: D00m :O
2009-09-25 [the wonderfall-man]: the doomed infestation is nice...
2009-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs evily as I throw pies in everyone's face*
2009-09-25 [Ninja Smurf]: *hides behind misty to stay away from pie*
2009-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I wouldn't pie you Jerry, but I can give you a pie for your kids, what kind do they like?
2009-09-25 [Duke Devlin]: Fascist? You've got me all wrong, darlin'. ;)
And hammer, you can't do anything BUT half-ass in Bob's Diner, of course... You can't half-ass half-assing, becuase that creates irreparable damage in Bob's psyche.
I fully intend to procreate in the future. My first kid is being named Project Russa, the second Lucifer, and the third Lucien. If I get that far. ;D
2009-09-25 [Aliz]: Neat names XD
2009-09-25 [hammersmashface]: oi!! half ass of a half ass...thats some unknown small fraction
2009-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I know! ...see, they want you to think it's 1/4 ass, but you have to realize we're dealing with asses here. Since ass is already a fraction of 1/2 (because we're only dealing with an ass, not an ass whole), we have to start from there, rather than 1.
2009-09-25 [Ninja Smurf]: that would mean you are really 1/8th assing.
2009-09-25 [hammersmashface]: wow thats lazy !!
2009-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, unless you half-ass it... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-25 [hammersmashface]: actualy, we at the local workers union like to call it "conserving work" 
2009-09-25 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: I like to call it "creative working," wherein the person "working" is very creative about how they actually work, IF they work.... you could also call it "LAZY AS FUCK", but semantics is a waste of time...
2009-09-25 [hammersmashface]: then its agreed, from now on we will called it "BDW" Bob's diner working!!
2009-09-25 [Ninja Smurf]: was this supposed to be one of those nearly productive things on this? hmm.. I think I missed the vote.
2009-09-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: I said


http://www.points2shop.com/?ref=sagaciousturkey !!
2009-09-26 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: lmao... ok ok... *clicks the link* sheesh...
2009-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't trust links that you and or Mort send me, sorry.
2009-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: You're not that bright, are you Misty...? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Actually the last link you sent me made you the owner of one of my wikis, so I'm smart not to trust you.
2009-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: That was an Elftown link. And I have nothing to do with Turkey's link...
2009-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know but he sent me a spam e-mail before so yeah.
2009-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: No I didn't...
2009-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes you did, I have the proof in my e-mail box.
2009-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Let's see some proof!
2009-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok, I'll go find it.
2009-09-26 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO no proof? :O
2009-09-26 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *POOF* there goes the evidence
2009-09-26 [Duke Devlin]: *POOOOOFFFFF*
2009-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Poof??
2009-09-27 [Duke Devlin]: Yep. Poof. It's a strange variety of green Gnomes.
2009-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: It appears that I have deleted the e-mail while cleaning out my inbox, but I still have his e-mail in my contacts.
2009-09-27 [twitchboy]: my emails load directly to my brain. Funny i can only hold three...hmm
2009-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2009-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Suuuuure, misty... you and your crazy lies... *eats ramen*...
2009-09-28 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *pisses in your ramen* wOot!
2009-09-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: lmao... hahahahahahahaahahaha
2009-09-28 [Duke Devlin]: -.-
2009-09-29 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *wipes ass with napkin behind your back, then taps you on the shoulder* hey... penguin... need a napkin???
2009-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: You weirdo... *punches Daemeon with a tentacle*
2009-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: You sprouted tentacles Penguin, when did that happen, have you been playing in the nuclear waste again?
2009-09-30 [Ninja Smurf]: Wow.. I did't know Penguin was from Jersey... Either that or from the deep south... where family breeds true.. literaly. (if that's too subtle ask someone)
2009-09-30 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: Nah, he's one of those penguins that escaped from Central Park Zoo back in the 90's...made it to the Hudson River and got.....transformed, like....
2009-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY! I'm from the South, don't blame it on the deep south!
2009-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it, Misty. You're the thing that makes the south look bad for the rest of us... *eats ramen sophisticatedly with his hands*...
2009-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh right, that's a riot, you're the one stinking up the place, your oder killed all of the cows.
2009-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Sh*t! I've got $24.80 in loose change laying around! It's mostly just nickels... and that's not even counting the massive pile of pennies... I'm not even going to attempt to sort that stack... *a rumble comes from the bowels of the penny pile*...
2009-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: What was that, do you have a penny monster??
2009-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws out a Chuck-E-Cheese token*... *keeps digging through the change piles*... whoa... a NAMCO token? Do they even exist anymore? ...*discards worthless pesos*...
2009-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: No, that was just Obama... he likes to live in the change...
2009-09-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *watches Mr. Penguin dig through his change*
2009-09-30 [Ninja Smurf]: Do people from the south know how to count? If so, I didnt meet any of those rare people when I was there..
2009-09-30 [Araglas]: hey I know how to count...and I am from the south
2009-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I can count to potato!! ...but, yeah... we got some Asians down here, so of course!
2009-09-30 [Ninja Smurf]: cheaters.. importing people to count for you..


and Misty, using your fingers doesn't count.
2009-10-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I can count what are you talking about Mr. Jerry, I shall tell the Mistress!!
2009-10-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: I'm from Texas and I can count.....cant get much more south then here...unless we are talkin bout Mexico xD
2009-10-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: I live in the northern part of Florida.
2009-10-01 [Ninja Smurf]: Florida is a northern state that moved.. and again I must repeat, for Vearichan's benefit this time, using fingers and toes doesn't count :p
2009-10-01 [Duke Devlin]: Wowzers. I do love the ADORATION the North & South has for eachother. ;) Don't worry, it's the same here. ;P
2009-10-01 [Nekko fox]: Adoration looks so similar to abortion when you are quickly scrolling. Did you notice that?
2009-10-01 [Ninja Smurf]: if only *dreams of aborting the south, especially Georgia, where his ex wife lives*
2009-10-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I hate how Elftown used to be... of course... it's still pretty much like this now...


kyo-kun: [Hedda] is a big jack ass, eccuse my language


Sagacious Turkey: *gasp* how dare you?! ...he's not that big!


kyo-kun: fuck [Hedda]


Sagacious Turkey: yes... I'm sure you'd love to...


kyo-kun: i'm serious someone report me or something


Sagacious Turkey: For what...? You have done nothing wrong...


kyo-kun: being a asshole


Sagacious Turkey: nah...


kyo-kun: ok fine go look at the 10th member page


Sagacious Turkey: uh huh... it looks like a wiki...


kyo-kun: you put it back, why didn't you report me


Sagacious Turkey: ...Reasons unkown...


Didilidoo: that is really tight i can't belive u said that!!!


Sagacious Turkey: uh huh... riiiiight...


Shade Wolf: Please stop fighting.


Sagacious Turkey: Who's fighting...?


Didilidoo: i'm noooot [Didilidoo]


Blaze the Nameless: What's going on? What did I miss?


~devils_child~: hi


mechanical angel: woooohooo... i missed a lot in here...


Shade Wolf: ok


Death's Die-Ary: um wow you guys are getting out of hand.


Shade Wolf: Extremely out of hand


Didilidoo: why are we getting out of hand????


tragedy of life: *is confused* whos out of hand?


Didilidoo: i knoooow same here


Insanelife: been away for a while, what I miss?


mechanical angel: Oh lets just... be calm


Death's Die-Ary: [Didilidoo] & [Sagacious Turkey] were talkin shit to each other,knowing that the guards will bann them, after all they are watching this wiki


Sagacious Turkey: ...Ban... for what...?


Death's Die-Ary: arguing over dumb stuff.


Sagacious Turkey: You can't get banned for that...


Death's Die-Ary: wanna find out?


Sagacious Turkey: Sure...


Didilidoo: i wasn't talkin shit!!! i was just saying coz they were being mean about sum1s mum!


Erinbabe: [Didilidoo] and [Sagacious Turkey]. You both have been causing trouble in this wiki. No more. You are both banned from this wiki. If you comment in it again, you will be banned from Elftown entirely. If you make trouble in another wiki again, you will be banned from Elftown entirely. ET Guards.


mechanical angel: Yay.. i love that. People that fight actually get kicked out...


girl. interrupted.: yeah, they've been enforcing the 'law'. ^_^


Blaze the Nameless: Thank you gaurds!!!
2009-10-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Luckily that whore of a guard erinbabe is gone now... if only we could do away with the rest of the trash on the council... *sweeps out the bathrooms*... *broom dissovles from some mysterious acid on the floor*...
2009-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...I believe that was Prep Haters and the guard (erinbabe) is now [Rennie]... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: And I remember Death's Diarrhea! ...good times... goooood ti- *chokes to death on ramen*
2009-10-02 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: stupid ass... dont you remember me pissing in that damn ramen??? *snickers* for twenty bucks, I do think i can remember cpr and the heimlich and shit...
2009-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *keeps eating ramen*... hmmh?!
2009-10-02 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *takes a poo in your ramen* will you stop eating that shit, now, Penguin, and get something a little more.......substantial??? Try eating......Gung Pao Chicken or something....
2009-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I don't negotiate with terrorists!! ...*keeps eating ramen*... heh heh... that'll teach you...
2009-10-03 [Duke Devlin]: If you feed a terrorist, or fund a terrorist... You're a terrorist.
2009-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... what if I kill a terrorist and feed it to another terrorist...? ...or rob a terrorist and give that money to another terrorist...? ...does harming one terrorist cancel it out, or am I still a terrorist?
2009-10-03 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: ALLAHU AKHBAR!!!!!! *blows self up to get to the penguin....thereby assuring his place in terrorist heaven, aka "Paradise"*
2009-10-04 [Duke Devlin]: Only if they are from the same terrorist organisation. ;D Otherwise no. :P Though you Mort, are actually always gonna be a terrorist, I'm afraid. ;D
Daemeon: (Where your virgins will secretly all be losers, and old men.)
2009-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Not The Penguin! NOOOOO!! ...curse you, Akbar! Now who will the Batman fight?!
2009-10-04 [Araglas]: ........meep meep
2009-10-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: You guys are crazy.
2009-10-04 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-10-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *watches*
2009-10-04 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: fuck that, Duke, thats not PARADISE, that's HELL personified :P Besides, I couldn't possibly belong to a terrorist organization that believes in old ugly man-virgins... that sort of thing is just.... undignified....
2009-10-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Man-Virgins???
2009-10-04 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: as opposed to woman-virgins... which, i must say, are so much more fun... and more my orientation.....
2009-10-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I could tell.
2009-10-04 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: How's that??? For all you know, i could have been a raging drag queen from Botswana or something :P (ISNT)
2009-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, so you're from Portugal then...? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-10-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*colors in the pictures in the newspaper with crayons*...
2009-10-04 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: not really.. -.- *isnt a raging homosexual dragqueen from ANYWHERE, as he is not a raging homosexual drag queen, nor any other type of homosexual or drag queen....* just sayin...
2009-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Transvestite then! ...whatever! Cut me some slack, jerk! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-10-05 [hammersmashface]: an internal glitch like malfunction in the human creation system?
2009-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a glitch!
2009-10-05 [Duke Devlin]: Aye, I concur. However, how are the terrorists to know that their virgins promised in death are actually ugly old men and women? :(
2009-10-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: That is true, they could be young ugly women and men, or they could be beautiful young women and men
2009-10-05 [hammersmashface]: dose it actualy say "HUMAN" virgin? might be a virgin sea crab
2009-10-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh that's gross, then they would have crabs. XD lol
2009-10-06 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: I think I'll just give up my terrorist leanings, and retire to the countryside and develop homemade nukes... after all, kids, remember that الله اكبر! <--- *Five bucks if ya can guess what this means :P*
2009-10-06 [Duke Devlin]: SHIT?! :D Even though five bucks is like, £3.50 here. XD
2009-10-06 [hammersmashface]: L3.50 O.O i could buy my way out of slavery with those kinda funds!!
2009-10-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet, you! *whips [hammersmashface]* ...you get back in that field, boy!
2009-10-07 [Ninja Smurf]: wow...here I was thinking that it was Mort that loved getting whipped... *eats ramen*
2009-10-07 [Ninja Smurf]: *snickers at stealing morts line*
2009-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...my line! How dare you steal my line of cocaine?!
2009-10-07 [Ninja Smurf]: *sniff* wasn't me.... I bet it was Zane... he's a terrorist remember
2009-10-07 alberto: shut up
2009-10-08 [Duke Devlin]: Mort deals that shit - he don't take it. ;D
(And yes, that was an ambiguous response. Could have been to either ;D)
2009-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, it's true for both, so it's good... *eats ramen*... OMG THERE'S A F***ING SPIDER IN HERE!! *throws the hot ramen in Misty's face*
2009-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and as a young child I did carry a small baggie of powdered sugar around in my coat... I would glance around and slowly take it out and ask, "Hey, buddy... you want to buy some of the sweet stuff?"... gooood times... until the court case... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-09 [hammersmashface]: i know right you sell one little back of fake questionable substance to a cop and every hacks down your throught....



2009-10-09 [hammersmashface]:  if only i had that 3.50 money
2009-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I ain't givin' you no tree fitty agin'! *whips Duke Devlin's face for no apparent reason*
2009-10-09 [Duke Devlin]: Come on now! That's not okay... >:( *rawrs and keelz*
2009-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, well- *bathtubs come crashing in through the roof*... *innocent lives are lost*...
2009-10-09 [Duke Devlin]: Oh dear, I guess you'll just have to mop this up then... *the baths were inexplicably filled with mayonnaise*
2009-10-09 [Ninja Smurf]: umm... that wasn't mayonnaise..... *is very tired*
2009-10-09 [Duke Devlin]: ....... I don't wanna know.... D:
2009-10-09 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *gives the money to mort* YOU CANNAE HAVE IT DUKE!!!!!!
2009-10-09 [Duke Devlin]: Whut? ;.; But you owe me five bucks!
2009-10-10 [Alexi Ice]: *Blinks* Hey! People!!
2009-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: KI-YAH! *punches Akane Ice's kneecaps*
2009-10-10 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *pulls out his trusty squad automatic weapon, affectionately known as a SAW, and sprays everyone in the area down* hehehehehehehehehehehe
2009-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *sneaks up from behind and slashes Daemeon with a knife*... *gets five points*... *calls in an air strike*...
2009-10-11 [hammersmashface]: 
2009-10-11 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *wipes the blood off his BDU's, and advances on mort, firing heavily* DIE YOU RAMEN EATING BASTARD!!! :P
2009-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats chicken*... HUH?!
2009-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *reaches for some ammo I had in my pocket, but can't find it*... *dies gruesomely*...
2009-10-12 [Araglas]: *gets out from under the bar and throws a plasma grenade at Zane*
2009-10-12 [Duke Devlin]: *backs away slowly and steals cash from the register*
2009-10-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: *is under table* What's up suckers, I mean uh peeps!
2009-10-12 [hammersmashface]:   ~should of figured this place makes no money~
2009-10-13 [Ninja Smurf]: this place has a register? wow...
2009-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Some Unfinished Comics
2009-10-14 [the wonderfall-man]: whats happend laitly?
2009-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Death, pillaging, unicorn battle... the usual... *eats ramen out of a carved out unicorn skull*...
2009-10-14 [hammersmashface]: HA! feast of the unicorn  +4/+1 enchantment
2009-10-14 [Ninja Smurf]: wow... magic.... been a very long time...
2009-10-14 [Alexi Ice]: ECM Zombie (ZPAM). HAHAHA! We can do that on this page, right O.o (probably going to get in trouble)
2009-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I see your enchantment... and I lay this trap card! Face down! Defense mode! Go fish! ...*eats ramen*... *collects all the poker chips*...
2009-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*sends the queen of hearts and the ace of spades to the graveyard*... *uses an energy to boost pikachu's attack*... heh heh heh... suckers... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-15 [Ninja Smurf]: I Lost the Game hehehe.. (Akane told me to)






*sends Ninja Smurfs after Penguin*
2009-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lj9IdUR7qaw
2009-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FO0kRE5OTZI
2009-10-16 [Mustard man]: im back
2009-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn puppy ninja bards... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-16 [Alexi Ice]: Puppy ninja? ZOMG! That sounds so cute...>>
2009-10-16 [twitchboy]: squirrel ninja?
2009-10-16 [Ninja Smurf]: my smurf ninja can take your puppy ninja
2009-10-16 [Mustard man]: shit cat ninjas are better than a smurf or puppy
2009-10-16 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: fuck that... *rises from the ashes of the plasma grenade attack so uncermoniously excecuted against him* YOU WILL ALL PAY, STARTING WITH THE PUPPY, CAT, AND SMURF NINJAS!!!! *kills all the ninjas in the room, exceptf, of course, himself* MUWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
2009-10-16 [Mustard man]: why did you do that? you messed up pretty good hotdog meat
2009-10-18 [twitchboy]: Squirrel ninja!
  

2009-10-18 [Tekkon KinKreet]: SQUIRREL!!! *pulls out shotgun*
2009-10-19 [Mustard man]: im in love with a mustard girl
2009-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: But, what about ketchup lady?
2009-10-19 [Mustard man]: but she'd rarhter fuck mustard
2009-10-19 [twitchboy]: no killy squirrel
2009-10-19 [the wonderfall-man]: what are you guys talking about?
2009-10-19 [Mustard man]: i dont know...im scared
2009-10-20 [the wonderfall-man]: I got confused about the mustard girl and ketchup lady.
2009-10-20 [Alexi Ice]: It's illegal for men to fuck girls...>>
2009-10-20 [Fallen Child Athena]: .......
2009-10-21 [Duke Devlin]: *launches a crate-load of AK's into the room* ... *leaves*
2009-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ew... it has her stink on it... *throws the crate into the dumpster*...
2009-10-22 [the wonderfall-man]: *starts crying by the rail of the tumpster* No...I could have made a zombie slaughter with thoughs. *He said as the zombies started coming to Bob's Diner*
2009-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...It's too late for your whining! There's nothing we could have done! ...*lights the dumpster on fire*... NOTHING!! ...*zombies start crawling in through the window*...
2009-10-24 [hammersmashface]:  
2009-10-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *has Zombie replent* HI MORT!
2009-10-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty!! ...*puts a hand on Misty's shoulder*... *pushes her out the window into the path of the zombies*...
2009-10-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey, that's not cool. *crawls back in the window*
2009-10-24 [Duke Devlin]: That's not okay. *shakes head sadly*
2009-10-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *waves at Duke* HI!
2009-10-24 [Duke Devlin]: Howdy Foo'
2009-10-25 [Nioniel]: Well, your shameless advertising brought me here...very amusing.
^^
2009-10-26 [Fallen Child Athena]: Hey Pheniox^^ ~blows up Mort along with the Zombes~
2009-10-26 [Nioniel]: ^_^
Hi....


Nice place you've got here...
2009-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: No it isn't! Stop lying!!
2009-10-26 [Nioniel]:
Erm... *runs away*
2009-10-26 [Nekko fox]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HZ6cw_MuTDE



BE PREPARED!
2009-10-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: For what?
2009-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...to get bashed severely with a brick. What else?
2009-10-27 [Duke Devlin]: Severally? Surely you mean 'severely'? ;)
2009-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what I said!!
2009-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *a rat crawls out of the oven in the kitchen*... Someone catch it! My lunch is escaping!
2009-10-27 [Flisky]: *pulls out shotgun from nowhere and blasts the rat's brain*
2009-10-27 [Ninja Smurf]: Mort: It's not what you said if you edited it afterwards.. sorry... *stamps "loser" on Morts forehead for tryng to hide his mistake and runs away*
2009-10-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Go Jerry.
2009-10-28 [the wonderfall-man]: *jumps on the rat and puts it in a soup* Just what I was missing, some nice fresh rat.
2009-10-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~steals Morts ramen and throws it out the window~
2009-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY GOD. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY WINDOW?!
2009-10-28 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO XD
Terrible behaviour.
2009-10-28 [Flisky]: *stands back like an art critic* I don't know. Adds a little...jena se qua. Don't you think?
2009-10-28 [Fallen Child Athena]: I broke it with your ramen...so in a way you broke tha window Mort xD
2009-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... I love a little ménage à trois. It really brightens up your day, you know?


No. No I did not. You fix that window right now.
2009-10-29 [the wonderfall-man]: *gets hit in the head by the rock hard ramen as someone through it back through the broken window* Your ramens back Mork. Why is it so hard?
2009-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said! ...and I responded by slapping her and telling her to fix me a sammich... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-29 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~throws a rock at Mort~ Fix your own damn window xD
2009-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps [Fallen Child Athena]* Go fix me a sammi- I mean... Go fix that window!
2009-10-30 [Ninja Smurf]: *slaps Mort* Go fix ME a sammich while he fix's your window!
2009-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: What do you think this is?! Some kind of F***ing diner?! *angrily kicks over a table with customers at it*
2009-10-30 [Flisky]: *watches in shock as her table is kicked over* Hey! *pulls out gun again* All right, who pissed off the angry man?
2009-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from a newspaper*... huh? ...don't be so melodramatic... nobody kicked over your table, weirdo... *goes back to reading the newspaper*... whoa... there's a sale on womens shoes next week... *marks the date on a calendar*... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-30 [Duke Devlin]: Creeeeeeeeeeeeeepy.
2009-10-30 [Ninja Smurf]: Mort, is there something about you the rest of us should know? As in, you becoming one of those purple cats you love to talk about?
2009-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: jerry, I am a penguin. The science on this still remains inconclusive, but I hypothesize that: penguin ≠ cat.


However, we can't be completely sure until the test results come back. Until then, we'll just have to treat my hypothesis as a plausible theory... *eats ramen*...
2009-10-30 [Duke Devlin]: Well put, good man.
2009-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: No, you're a man!
2009-10-30 [Duke Devlin]: YOUR MUM IS A MAN!
2009-10-30 [Flisky]: *pops up* Your face is a man! *isn't sure who she was insulting, so goes back to meal, which promptly attempts to crawl away*
2009-11-01 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~pokes Jerry~ Im a girl xD ~slaps Mort~ Fix your own Sammich and window Damnit!!!
2009-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: YYYYAAAAAAAAAAAHH!! *chops off Vearichan's head with a chainsaw*


*ducts tapes the head back on*... now go fix that refrigerator like I told you to! ...*eats ramen*... brr... it's cold in here... somebody close the window...
2009-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in* Did somebody say sodomy?!
2009-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! No... I said 'Saddam's Army'...
2009-11-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh... well... is that anything like Dumbledore's Army...? ...*casually pushes a salt shaker off a table*...
2009-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Kind of... but, you know, a little more terroristy... *the slugs on the ground start bubbling*...
2009-11-01 [Ninja Smurf]: Vearichan: Apparently so is Mort...




Mort: It could also be some sort of genetic mutation after eating all kinds of cheap noodles...
2009-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: jokerjerry: Disembowelment hurts.
2009-11-01 [Ninja Smurf]: How would you know? Maybe the screams are from pleasure. First try it, then tell me, and I'll take your word on it.... I kind of like my bowels right where they are.
2009-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Boy, I've been disemboweled sixteen times befer! Y'all youngens just don't understand. You all got it good... why, back in my day, you'd get disemboweled just fer bein' late to school, I tell you whut! ...*eats ramen out of a Solo cup*...
2009-11-02 [Daemeon Arkenyon Zane]: *promptly eliminates all traces of idiocy from Bob's Diner, thereby eradicating all known life forms (and some that science will NEVER be able to identify) in the vicinity, excepting, of course, himself, thereby ensuring that the human race will never have to suffer such inept stabs at intelligence from this cesspool restaurant again* :D
2009-11-02 [Duke Devlin]: Haha! Ain't it cute? *pokes Daemeon's face* He think he's all powerful... *haerty laugh*
2009-11-02 [twitchboy]: i likey my intestines where they be
2009-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! ...the cesspool is actually located out back... we just added a diving board and everything... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-03 [Flisky]: *sits up after having digested something truly heinous* I'm not an idiot! You can't eliminate me! *promptly falls over again*
2009-11-03 [Daring Silence]: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE




(Comment)
2009-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT?! YOU DIGESTED A HYENA?! ...*eats ramen*... *swims around in the cesspool*... Aah! Cramp! I knew I should have waited thirty minutes! *drowns*
2009-11-04 [the wonderfall-man]: *jumps on a dead hyena and starts cooking it* Anyone want some hyena?
2009-11-04 [Flisky]: *burbs* No more hyena.
2009-11-04 [Ninja Smurf]: And here I was thinking that with Mort all drowned like, the food would improve.
2009-11-04 [Duke Devlin]: Unlikely! He ain't the chef here!
2009-11-04 [Ninja Smurf]: I was more thinking actually being able to eat the food without the flies that he seems to attract.
2009-11-04 [Fallen Child Athena]: Wow........
2009-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not nice... these people are valuable customers, not flies... well... Veari's a fly...
2009-11-04 [Flisky]: I am not a customer. I just eat here. (When I want botulism and dysentery.)
2009-11-05 [the wonderfall-man]: but being a customer is so nice and fun. *starts sounding like a hypnotized crazy guy* Join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us, join us...
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: So... did you guys remember, remember the fifth of November? ...*eats ramen*...
2009-11-06 [Ninja Smurf]: umm.. no.. but thats ok, cus it's pretty much gone.... andI am almost tru an entire bottle of captain morgans.. so don' rememer much
2009-11-06 [Alexi Ice]: This place hasn't been blown up already? Damn...>>
2009-11-06 [Ninja Smurf]: multiple times actually.. but its like a damn cockroach...
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: There's nothing left to blow up! ...except that doll... but she's mine... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-06 [Alexi Ice]: The doll? I knew you couldn't love anything other than the diner and inanimate plastic chicks O.o
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: And horses.
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Mmm mmm. Sweeeeet horses.
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *licks lips*
2009-11-06 [Ninja Smurf]: oh wow.. Mort, keep the oral sex to humans... ok?
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*slurps a neck vein out of a fresh horse corpse*... hmm?! ...*starts chewing the trachea*...
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Anyway, back to our discussion on politics. I believe today's modern politics are too political. What are your thoughts on the matter, guys?
2009-11-06 [Ninja Smurf]: yes, politics are just a little bit politicle, thats why I voted for th creation of concentration camps fo polititians
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: IT DOESN'T MATTER WHAT YOUR THOUGHTS ARE! *spits a chunk of horse spine at [Ninja Smurf]*
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Yep. Quaaality conversations here, folks... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-06 [Ninja Smurf]: it would probobly help if we weren't the only two having this damn conversation... i feel like I am talking to the kid who got kicked off the short bus for licking windows. *wipes horse spine off shirt*
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: If the freakin' kid beside me hadn't smeared syrup on the windows, I probably wouldn't have!


Speaking of windows, I should go buy windows 7. I am a student after all, so what's that... like a 75% discount they's offering? And that's for the home professional one too... sweet deal, yo. Then again, maybe I should switch back to Windows 95... I miss that Hover! game they had...
2009-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: I miss Chips Challenge. :O
Dayum, maybe I should get Windows 7.
2009-11-06 [Flisky]: Windows 95 for the win!
2009-11-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~still aint fixing the window~ So whats up?
2009-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: I wanted to trial Win 7, but partitioning etc was too much trouble, so I ran it in VirtualBox, and it didn't run well. -.- But my mate just bought a laptop with it on... So I get to play on it later. >:)
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: See if it comes with new games!
2009-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: I will. XD
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, steal it and sell it to buy drugs.
2009-11-06 [Duke Devlin]: Done. ;D
2009-11-06 [Pillowthief]: I just bought a mac. Seems that it didn't like my PC laptop too much so it humped it a few times then set it on fire.
Agonizing to hear.
Maybe I should sell it and go back to PC, at least they aren't so mean when they hump other computers.
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what you get for trusting Mac! You also get herpes...
2009-11-06 [Pillowthief]: I think the fire pretty much solves that issue.
2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Fire solves all issues.
2009-11-06 [Pillowthief]: When in doubt... Use iMac.
  

2009-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: iMac'd your mom!
2009-11-07 [Duke Devlin]: Lmao, I adore Mac. But can't afford them. >___>
2009-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: But Mac sucks though!
2009-11-08 [Ninja Smurf]: Mac sucks... Mort swollows... tis the way of the world.
2009-11-08 [twitchboy]: screw that im building my own! yay generation Y approach "Fuck that, i can do better"
2009-11-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: WUZ UP?!
2009-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: TAKE YOUR SHOES OFF! *chops Misty's leg off with an ax*
2009-11-10 [Fearathress]: *Takes a seat in a corner*
2009-11-10 [Alexi Ice]:   
  

2009-11-10 [Alexi Ice]: Let us frolic!!
2009-11-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: WHAT THE HELL?! It's Edward and Bella with a rainbow background! XD
2009-11-11 [Flisky]: And Edward sparkles! See, I would rather my vampire bring legendary queens back to life with violin music than sparkle.
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]:  
 
  
 What's goin' on in here, guys?
2009-11-11 [Ninja Smurf]: gotta love the Lestat reference Flisk!
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: CALM DOWN, JERRY!! *grabs jerry's shirt* CALM *slap* DOWN *slap* IT'S *slap* ALL *slap* GOING *slap* TO *slap* BE *slap* OKAY *slap* BUT *slap* SERIOUSLY *slap* HAVE *slap* YOU *slap* TRIED *slap* OUR *slap* NEW *slap* SLUG *slap* NUGGETS *slap* THEY *slap* ARE *slap* DELICIOUS *slap* GO *slap* BUY *slap* SOME *slap* RIGHT *slap* NOW *slap* HERE *slap* I'LL *slap* LET *slap* YOU *slap* HAVE *slap* THIS *slap* COUPON *slap* *gives coupon* *slap*
2009-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in wearing a mask*... EVERYBODY GET DOWN! *fires a couples of shots into the air*... *points a gun at [Mortified Penguin]'s head*... PUT ALL THE MONEY FROM THE REGISTER AND THE SAFE INTO THIS BAG OR I'LL KILL EVERYONE HERE ONE BY ONE!!
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *doesn't look up from his newspaper*... Uh huh... yeah... shipments go around back, man... *eats a bite of ramen without looking up*...
2009-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *grabs Misty*... Alright! That's it! I'm going to kill her if you don't cooperate!!
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *keeps reading*... Yup... third door on the left... just put it with the rest of the boxes...
2009-11-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *violently cuts off Misty's head*
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*still reading*... *picks up misty's head*... *hands it to Turk without looking up*... I think you dropped this, bro... but if there's not any room, just leave it by the door... I'll sort it later... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: ...whoa... Man Without Arms Still Manages To Give A Helping Hand? ...interesting... *cuts out the article and puts it on the fridge*...
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner's Slug Nuggets Lead To The Death Of Millions? ...intriguing... *clips the article and tacks it on Nok's face*...
2009-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Police Trace Newspaper Theft To Local Diner Owner? ...hmm... *starts cutting out the article*... *police burst in*... Now, officers... I know what it looks like... but don't worry. That body was here when I bought the place. *the police are satisfied and leave without incident*
2009-11-11 [Flisky]: jerry: Yeah, he's great.


mort: I'm not trying the slug nuggets. That's suicide. *eats some anyway*
2009-11-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sup?
2009-11-12 [twitchboy]:   
2009-11-12 [Pillowthief]: My god. That Twilight Head Trip is going on my fridge. *cuts out the computer and tacks it to the fridge*
2009-11-12 [Alexi Ice]: Except...>> Blood plus doesn't actually involve VAMPIRES. Unless you count Saia's sword...
2009-11-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: :( but...but...TWILIGHT! :( *points at username* im a twilight addict but im not a freak for the foolish sparkley vampires...i like the schmexy werewolves.
2009-11-13 [twitchboy]: they is not werewolves....just shapeshifters...yeah meyer's took the universal rules of monsters and though How much can i fuck this up?
2009-11-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: :( but i love my Jacob. :( My wolf shapeshifter ish schmexy....and he is funny. Unlike the stupid edward. Edward is so uptight and strict and Jacob is just 'i wana have some fun and risk my life' ^.^
2009-11-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: At least in not an Edward enthusiast
2009-11-13 [Alexi Ice]: ...>> *Team Jasper.* LOL!
2009-11-13 [Alexi Ice]: I love the fear of death. <3
2009-11-13 [twitchboy]: Team alucard
2009-11-13 [Pillowthief]: ...Weak...
2009-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Vampires suck! Except for Blacula of course...
2009-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: And no, that wasn't a "vampires suck... blood!" joke...


Vampires are lame.
2009-11-13 [Pillowthief]: Except for Count Chocula. He was cool.
2009-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... the Count from Sesame Street used to be cool... until he killed that kid on a live episode... I can remember it like it was yesterday...


Blah ha ha! Cahn you keeds cownt to ten?!
One! Two! Three! Potato! Shoe! Albatross!
No, you leetle bahstards! BLAH!! You are not even leesening to me! You die now!


Yup... goooood times...
2009-11-13 [Pillowthief]: I was wondering why I wasnt seeing him at the 40th aniversary of Sesame Steet on 'Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader'.


Of which, I saw someone who answered the 1st grade question- 'Is the US a continent?'.


She answered, 'I've never been surer than right now. The US is North America and North America is a continent. I'll lock that in.'          


Heeeere's your sign.
2009-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I wish he would take an actual sign and beat them in the face with it... Like one of those big, heavy stop signs. Heck, I've got a few of them I stole out in ma' truck. I could loan him a couple.
2009-11-13 [Pillowthief]: You could make quite a living selling them to him. There's quite a few idiots in America...


Do you have any with the sharp edges? I'd charge less for those...
2009-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I gots a few o' them there trinangulor ones... they's pretty sharp, I reckon...
2009-11-14 [Alexi Ice]: Oh. My. gawd! He totally needs to beat them sensless!! *Grabs popcorn from the diner* *Finds a hand* *eats it anyway* .... Here's your sign *SMACK, BLOODSPLATTER, DUMB GUY HITS FLOOR* Hmmm...*Grabs fork and digs in.* Ah! Stupidity tastes the sweetest.
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]: Waka waka waka...
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-11-14 [Duke Devlin]: When you gon' change the special, fag? >:(
2009-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not nice, Duke. Don't call [Nekko fox] a fag... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]: I'm special! DERP DERP!
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Looks like we gotta put 'im down... *takes a shotgun off the rack*...
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Batman also lieks chocolate milk...
2009-11-14 [Duke Devlin]: Oh no... No he does not.
2009-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you question what batman lieks!
2009-11-14 [Nekko fox]: Yes, he does. Case in point:




  

2009-11-15 [Duke Devlin]: Hahaha Okay, *concedes*
2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*takes a bite of ramen*... *gains 563 experience points*... *goes up to level 56*... *learns a new attack*... *uses fork twirl!*... *eats ramen more efficiently*...
2009-11-17 [Duke Devlin]: OMFG. I'm gonna run away and play Pokemon now.
2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Only if it's blue version! The rest are trash! ...except maybe silver version...
2009-11-17 [the wonderfall-man]: I have a ton of pokemon cards from when I was a little kid. Any one want them? I have enough to fill a shoe box.
2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Give them to me. For free. But only the holographic ones.
2009-11-17 [Nekko fox]: Especially your Charizard.


  

2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I already have that Charizard... but I could use some more of them!
2009-11-17 [Nekko fox]: At least it isn't Yu-Gi-Oh!
2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out Blue-Eyes White Dragon*
2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: What you say, boy?
2009-11-17 [twitchboy]: i play angemon
2009-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Angemon sucks! Wargreymon would rape Angemon any day...
2009-11-17 [Pillowthief]:   
2009-11-17 [twitchboy]: not! etemon is the best!
2009-11-17 [twitchboy]: 
Etemon will rock your socks
2009-11-18 [Company Awesome]: This place sucks.
2009-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom sucks! ...because she is a prostitute... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-18 [Company Awesome]: You suck.
2009-11-18 [Duke Devlin]: You suck worse, [Company Awesome]. >___> Don't insult the 'Diner. Or we may have to have our first United revolt against someone... >:) *taps baseball bat into hand menacingly* >___>
2009-11-18 [Flisky]: Ooo...revolts...*stands with random rifle* Who we revolting against?
2009-11-18 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: WOOHOO! Grabs machete. *evil grin*
2009-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: NO UNIONS! ...*shoots Flisk_girl*...
2009-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Here at Bob's What's-It-Called, we believe in the serf system! We frown upon unions, teamsters, and women's rights. We also frown upon having sex with the calamari in the kitchen, but we don't really enforce that rule as much... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-18 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *blinks*
2009-11-18 [Flisky]: *shoots Mort back* Don't shoot me! I'm not an Onion!
2009-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, carrots! Get back in that stew! ...you aren't ready yet!! *opens fire on the people in the diner*
2009-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: *Throws grenades at random* >:D
2009-11-19 [Flisky]: *in random british accent* But I don't want to be a pie! *back to normal* Oh, wait...wrong movie.
2009-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Hey! Don't you mock British accents! *turns an AK on Flisk*
2009-11-19 [Flisky]: *blinks* I...wasn't...It's from a movie! Chicken Run!
2009-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO I know. :P It's a reallllllly Shit British accent though. Like the worst ever.
2009-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I loved that movie! ...especially the part where Tiny Tim captured the biggest one and broke its neck for a Christmas dinner... and then Barnyard animals all talked and Babe saved the day... but only because Charlotte helped him with her web... gooood movie... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-19 [Flisky]: Duke: But it's still hilarious. Heehee.


Mort: Um...I think you have that backwards. Babe didn't save the day. He became dinner.
2009-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't eat a horse, silly!


Not without Horcestershire sauce anyway...
2009-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.tfsabridged.com/episodes/
2009-11-19 [Duke Devlin]: Flisk: I disagree. :P I personally find that to be one of the more disgusting British accents. D:
Mmmmmm Horcestershire sauce...
2009-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner will now be serving REAL toenails in the food! No more of that cheap, plastic crap... From here on out, it's all real ingredients. (except the beef, which will be half beef, half crayon, and half recycled cans... that's right! 150%!)
2009-11-19 [Flisky]: *falls over* But I don't want 150%! I want 175% dammit!
2009-11-19 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: 25% recycled cardboard?
2009-11-20 [Pillowthief]: What?! That stuff tastes like... Cardboard! Make it an even 24% and throw some salt on it.
2009-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, I do love a-salting cardboard...
2009-11-20 [Pillowthief]: Beat up cardboard. Mmm, tasty.
2009-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what I thought... but once you bite into it, it's actually pretty dry and bland...


But it doesn't have to be! Thanks to Bob's Cardboard Sauce! Now in two rich, new flavors: Tasty Turnip and Enjoyable Egg! (Warning: Product has been linked to spontaneous heart failure)
2009-11-22 [Nekko fox]: Now comes in four exciting, designer colors!:


White, off-white, pale yellow, and brown!
2009-11-22 [Duke Devlin]: I could go for some off-white Cardboard Sauce, from Bob'sTM! That sounds great - I'd love some with my 175% beef, crayon, recycled cans, and cardboard! :D
2009-11-23 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: hahahahahahahahahahahah
2009-11-24 [Duke Devlin]: .... Overkill.
2009-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I overkilled your mom last night!
2009-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: It's been a long time since I've been in a good ol' fashion fist fight... anyone want to come over to my house, so I can bruise your kidneys?
2009-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I miss high school... you could make fun of someone's dead mother and get into a fight after school... at worst, you'd get suspended for a day or two... but now that I'm in college, people just stab you when you talk trash about their moms... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*rubs knife wounds*... *eats ramen*...
2009-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *coughs violently*... am I going to have to go on another spamming spree to get activity for this place?!
2009-11-25 [Flisky]: Huh? Spam? I like spam.
2009-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Good. Because that's what B's D uses to make its cakes and pies...
2009-11-25 [Pillowthief]: I never got stabbed when I made fun of other peoples moms. Maybe you need to work on your Grr Face?


  

No, not that Grr. I mean like Evil Eye Grr.


  

Much better. I doubt you would get stabbed if you looked like this, Mort. Nobody would want to have sex with you either, but you must be used to that by now.
2009-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: It looks like he's already been stabbed! ...and a little chloroform is all I need to get laid...
2009-11-26 [dancingsheep]: Somehow, I feel a, "That's what she said," coming on.
2009-11-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Gobble gobble, bitches!
2009-11-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: Happy mother ******* Thanksgiving! *lights a small fire in the corner*
2009-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the inconspicuous guy in the corner catches on fire*... *he burns inconspicuously*...
2009-11-28 [CrystalBlaze]: lalalalalalalalalallalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalalal
2009-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.mcphee.com/shop/products/Handerpants.html
2009-11-28 [Flisky]: Disturbing....
2009-11-30 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~sighs~
2009-12-01 [zankou]: simply meant to be!    
2009-12-01 [zankou]:    somewhere    down deep, inside of these bones, an emptyness    began to to grow...  
2009-12-01 [zankou]: NMBC!!!!! jack is the bomb
  

2009-12-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Empty bones, eh? Sounds like a severe case of Marrowakitis. It's a disease in which microworms completely drain your bones and leaves them as flimsy, empty husks of their former selves. I prescribe leeches. Lots of leeches. Apply them directly to your face seven times a day and you should be just fine... *writes a prescription*... *staples it to your hand, so you won't lose it*...
2009-12-01 [Duke Devlin]: Wow, this place has been DEAD.
And yes, I'm sure my mother was dead - or some other quip. :P
2009-12-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm sorry for your loss... Did you at least take the head off, so she can't come back as a zombie?
2009-12-03 [zankou]: nightmare befor christmas....lol
2009-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright, you bastards had better start talking. Especially you, Tiny Tim!! ...*kicks Tim's crutch*... *he falls to the floor*...
2009-12-05 [the wonderfall-man]: *kicks tiny tim in the gut* I dont think he's going to talk anytime soon.
2009-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, not if you knock the breath out of him! ...you have to stomp his hand if you want a good reaction... *stomps Tiny Tim's fingers*... WHERE'S THAT CHRISTMAS GOOSE I TOLD YOU TO GET?!! *kicks his jaw*
2009-12-05 [Flisky]: *stares silently* Don't you guys know how to interrogate someone?
2009-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: With brute force?
2009-12-05 [Flisky]: No...with mental abuse...Geez...
2009-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I think they kind of go hand in hand... *eats ramen*...
2009-12-05 [Flisky]: Not always. *kicks Tiny Tim's carcass aside*
2009-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Don't bruise that meat! ...*tosses the corpse in the freezer*... we'll serve that in the chili next week...
2009-12-06 [the wonderfall-man]: *takes Tim's body and puts it on the old torcher strecher* This is how you loosen the meat from the bones to make it easyer to take apart. *starts turning the wheel making the bones to start dislocating and the meat losen from the bones*
2009-12-07 [Duke Devlin]: I'm really quite disappointed, 'Diners! Whut's with the lack of comments? :(
2009-12-07 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: I lost the game
2009-12-08 [Devil in Me]: hey guys what's up? Oh...I didn't know Mrs. Jacob Black was on here. ._.
2009-12-08 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: sorry Devil.....im everywhere. if you forget...i was also urging you to come check out the diner.
2009-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: Who doesn't need to check out the 'Diner? ;)
2009-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*breaks a bottle of hot sauce*... *stabs Duke Devlin with it*... but anyway... how are you guys doing?
2009-12-08 [Duke Devlin]: *rubs hot sauce in Mort's eyes*
2009-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: It burns so good! ...*eats ramen*...
2009-12-09 [Devil in Me]: you guys are hilarious, which is the oppisite of lowlarious you know?
2009-12-09 [Devil in Me]: so what's not so terrible to eat here?
2009-12-09 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: i think the most safe thing is prob the friday lunch special. LMAO though i don't think id even eat that.
2009-12-09 [Pillowthief]: *Sits back as everyone noisily scrolls up to the top of the page*


I do believe that's Fri's special... from last year. We still have stock, get 'em while you can!


*conspiciously sets the inconspicious guy in the corner back on fire, whos heart bursted open (putting the flames out of course) when Tiny Tim died*
2009-12-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh it's the good ship lollipop such a sweet trip to the candy shop... I like cookies.
2009-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*stomps cookies*... YOU EAT SQUID. EAT SQUID NOW.
2009-12-09 [Pillowthief]: Blargra.
2009-12-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: NOES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *eats the stomped on cookies after cleaning them with the squid*
2009-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: SSSSSQQQQUUUUUUUUUUUUUIIIIIIIIIIDDDDDD!!! *swarms of squids burst in*... *merges with the squids to form Ultra Squidtron*... *flops helplessly on the floor*... *dies*...
2009-12-09 [Pillowthief]: That... was downright disgusting.


You should have at least added noodles to that.
2009-12-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, maybe.
2009-12-09 [Pillowthief]: No MAYBE! Pad-Thai better than Ramen!
2009-12-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah, ok then.
2009-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: How DARE you?! ...ramen is great! ...*eats Pad-Thai*... mmm... this is some good ramen...
2009-12-10 [Devil in Me]: you peoplle confuse me!!!!! *runs aways yelling* i don't like Squid!!!
2009-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Devil; Welcome to the Madhouse. LMAO
Oh dear.
*launches grenades randomly*
2009-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: NO THROWING! I KEEP THEM NOW. ...*scoops up the grenades*... *waddles away*...
2009-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: Oopsies! ;D *theatrically winks at the audience, as she pulls the pin from one secretively hidden in her pocket* ;D
2009-12-11 [Devil in Me]: we're al gonna diiiiiieeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *8runns around screaming wildly like a blonde trying to slove a math problem*
2009-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll have you know that I'm blond! *solves difficult math problems*... *blond wig falls off*... Uh... um... LOOK! IT'S A TREE! ...*dives out the window into oncoming traffic*...
2009-12-11 [Duke Devlin]: My god! *accidently drops grenade in suprise at the sight of a tree*
2009-12-12 [Flisky]: *looks up from private musings* Tree?
2009-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: :O *things explode*
2009-12-12 [Flisky]: *watches things explode*
2009-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: *Flisk explodes*
2009-12-12 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *explodes people in MW2*
2009-12-12 [Duke Devlin]: *doesn't plug games*
2009-12-12 [Flisky]: *is exploded*
2009-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: LOLZ! *laughs and points*
2009-12-13 [Flisky]: *pulls self together again* That was...interesting. *shrugs and goes back to private musings*
2009-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: Quite! *noms bacon*
2009-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You put that paint strip down and get back to work! *throws a toilet brush at Devlin*
2009-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]:   



...whut should happen next? Someone give me a good storyline.
2009-12-13 [Duke Devlin]: *Gets back to work, eating the bacon-paint-strip*
LMAO I dunno, but I like it. XD
2009-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You would, wouldn't you?! Sick pedo... *eats ramen*...
2009-12-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2009-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Push it! Do it now.
2009-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait... then I'd have to spend time remaking Bob's Diner... never mind... don't push it...
2009-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Last night, while I lay in bed looking up at the stars and the night sky, I thought to myself, "Where the f*** did my roof go?!"
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: I'd quite like it if you could all spell 'paedo' right. :P Haha.
Also, I want that button. Then I could cause Mort all kinds of distress. ;D
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: Also, OLD JOKE, man.
2009-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE an old joke!


Okay, okay... So I was talking to my wife the other day, right? And I says, "Baby, when I die, I want you to cremate me and put my ashes in your salsa." and she asks why and I said, "So I can tear that ass up one last time!"
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: My god.... I think rocking psychotically in the corner is in order. o___O
2009-12-14 [Devil in Me]: OMG!!! WTF!!! what is up with the comic strip Mort?
2009-12-14 [Goma]: I would push the button but....I'm afraid the universe might have to connect to dial up...
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: Ouchies. =/
2009-12-14 [Goma]: though I'm pretty sure God has broadband and satellite TV...
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: That comic strip is... funny. Inappropriate for all ages, but funny. I dont think you need to add anything to it, its pretty good as a stand alone.
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: I'd imagine he has something moar epic than broadband and satelite tv. :P
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Cable?
2009-12-14 [Goma]: well if the universe has a reboot button then he's obviously expected problems so I'd assume he'd go with something simple and since he's above the clouds they can't mess with his reception.
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Cable then. Gotcha.
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: That's true... Well maybe he has telepathic tv? And Uber wireless-Ultra-Magic internet?
2009-12-14 [Goma]: lol god piggy backs on peoples Wi-fi xD
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: That'd almost be God-like.
I imagine Satan is leaching off free internet from him, right now.
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: That sounds likely. He'd definitely be the kinda guy that'd do that, I think. Satan I mean. He jacks interwebs all the time. And if God's goes down, well he steals from the Japanese.
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Meany.
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: Iknow. It's disgraceful.
2009-12-14 [Goma]: lol fun stuff,thought some Christians are rolling over in their graves right now...
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: XD I thought they went to heaven after death? D: Are you confining them to their coffins? That's harsh. :P
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Meany.
2009-12-14 [Goma]: If I control where Christians go after death what does that make me?
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: Uhhhh... An undertaker/coroner/grave-digger? 8D
2009-12-14 [Goma]: fun stuff xD maybe thats what I should be for Bob's Diner the local grave-digger...
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: That would be kinda creepy, especially since I keep imagining [Goma] wearing a Domo outfit.
  

2009-12-14 [Goma]: why Domo?
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: You know what? I imagine the same thing. oO
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Why not Domo?! You dont think they're qaulified to dig graves now? All they can do is eat people and chase kitty cats? Thats racist. You should be ashamed.
2009-12-14 [Goma]: so everyone imagines me as Domo...thats strange >.< I do like to chase cats though
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Duke doesnt count and I only imagine you as a domo when you talk about being a creepy grave digger.
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: Tut tut.
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: Why don't I count? >:(
2009-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Mort? You want to answer this one?
2009-12-14 [Duke Devlin]: :( That's not nice. :(
2009-12-14 [Goma]: T.T
2009-12-15 [Mortified Penguin]: NO, I DON'T WANT TO ANSWER THIS ONE!! *smashes a coffee pot on the ground*... wait... we don't have a coffee pot... then what did- *shrugs*... *eats ramen*...


And Non-Devlins don't count. Everybody knows that! ...but if you really want to count, I know a guy who can teach you... *a purple midget vampire steps out from the shadows and grabs Tiny Tim by the collar*... "One bitch slap! Two bitch slap! Three bitch slap! Blah ha ha haa!! Now go get me my razor blade, you leetle bastard!"...
2009-12-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Here we go! [Sagacious Turkey] and my latest masterpiece... I do believe it's one of the more sophisticated comics we've made in recent years... *eats ramen with hands*...


  

2009-12-15 [Devil in Me]: why would god have t.v. at all? He's All Seeing, so why would he need it he can just watch the people. Imagine all the free porn. lol jk
2009-12-15 [Goma]: because seeing everything would get old REALLY fast xD
2009-12-15 [Devil in Me]: yes but it's jjust the same kind of crap you see on t.v., only he'd know what was goning to happen and who was invovled. man i'd hate to be God!!!
2009-12-15 [Duke Devlin]: Well, I'll go visit the COUNT ;D Fuck y'all bitches.
Also, love the comic strip.
2009-12-15 [Devil in Me]: who is the COUNT?
2009-12-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sure God gets tired of watching reality shows all the time...
2009-12-15 [Devil in Me]: lol Mort. i think you're right i know i do.
2009-12-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *drives a truck through the wall*... eh, yo! Where you want this ******* shipment of cheese?
2009-12-15 [Mortified Penguin]: We didn't order no cheese! *launches a bazooka at the truck*
2009-12-16 [Duke Devlin]: OMFG ... Devil, shoot yo'self. Plx. :) :P
2009-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*gets crossbow off the wall*... *aims it in [Devil in Me]'s direction*... *shoots the snake behind her that was about to strike*...


.................Snake? Snake?! SNAAAAAAAAAKE!!!! ...*holds the dying snake in his arms*... I wasn't aiming for you! Please don't die!!


...*shrugs*... *throws the snake in the fridge*... *eats ramen*...
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: *eats snake* ... WAIT.. No I didn't. *throws remains behind self*
2009-12-17 [Flisky]: *looks up from newspaper* Did you just...eat that snake?
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Uhhh nah, that was you! *nods earnestly, sadly*
2009-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha... snake eater... *eats ramen*... it was a reticulated python! *Duke's health goes up*
2009-12-17 [Flisky]: *shrugs and goes back to newspaper*
2009-12-17 [Devil in Me]: why should i shoot my self to please you? i don't think so, *draws a knife and peels and apple* yuummm.
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Mmmmm apple..... *eats apple-fried-snake*
2009-12-17 [Devil in Me]: bad Devlin my apple! *stabs Devlin's hand*
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: *shoots Devil's eyes*
2009-12-17 [Devil in Me]: *is blindly thrashing out with a knife*
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: *Lolling in the corner*
2009-12-17 [Devil in Me]: *run out blindly and into a closed door* Oof! *falls on butt*
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: *grinning in the corner, nomming bacon-bit babies*
2009-12-17 [Devil in Me]: someone call a doctor i can't see!!!
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: Sure thang! *calls Nok*
2009-12-17 [Devil in Me]: who the hell is Nok????
2009-12-17 [Duke Devlin]: ... Oh dear, Devil. I think you should leave. :(
2009-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Nok is a creeeeepy wizard that lives in the broom closet...
2009-12-17 [Janouk]: *barges in* Serve me Flattened road kill squirrel please, I'm starving!
2009-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks a bottle*... is that a threat?! *stabs [Janouk] in the kidney*
2009-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my... This'll take minutes to clean up... =/
2009-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...clean... up...?
2009-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: Oh sorry, I forgot you like it rat-infested. *throws some Pikeys about*
2009-12-18 [Janouk]: Ouch! Well, serve me my kidney too then..
2009-12-18 [Devil in Me]: *runs out the door*
2009-12-18 [Duke Devlin]: *throws haddock after Devil*
2009-12-18 [Fallen Child Athena]: Goodbye
2009-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: That's the worst greeting I've ever heard, Veari... you need to work on that... *eats ramen*...
2009-12-19 [Duke Devlin]: Have to agree with Mort, there. =/
2009-12-19 [Nekko fox]: Life's little answer




  

2009-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I've known how to make nooses since I was a little kid... I always make them out of any string, rope, or cord that's long enough and leave them lying around... *eats ramen*...
2009-12-20 [Duke Devlin]: LMAO I like the instructions.
2009-12-20 [Devil in Me]: i'm baaaaccccccckkkkkkkk!!!!!!!!
2009-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn you! You killed the riveting conversation we were having!
2009-12-24 [Nekko fox]: TAKE THIS YOU BASTARD!


  

2009-12-24 [the wonderfall-man]: FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT!!!!!! I"M BETTING ON THE PANDA!!!!!!
2009-12-24 [zankou]: i like the pandas eyes...reminds me of my ex girlfreinds eyes
2009-12-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Merry Christmas, you douchebags!
2009-12-25 [Pillowthief]: But Im Jewish!
2009-12-25 [Pillowthief]: Congratulations Mort! You made the front page with that horrendous display at poetry.




It actually got quite the chuckle out of me, but I will admit- I actually was shaking my head through the first handful of lines thinking, "Mort? Being serious while writing poetry? WTF?"


Then, you ran over Hedda. It all kinda went downhill from there, showing us all the Mort that we all know and love. Kinda.
2009-12-25 [Mortified Penguin]: My poetry almost always ends with [Hedda] getting run over... *puts [Pillowthief] in the oven*
2009-12-25 [Pillowthief]: Hey- You forgot the icing!
2009-12-25 [Mortified Penguin]: You shut up in there! ...*beats the oven with a stick*... *turns the temperature up*...
2009-12-26 [Pillowthief]: Noooo! I don't WANT to be soap!


*Cries at the thought of all those poor Haitians that would use me to get clean*
2009-12-26 [Mortified Penguin]: At least you'll never have to see another Frenchman again!
2009-12-28 [*Phoenix*]: Hwello!!!!


"I'll take my soup with a fork, please."
2009-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *splashes hot soup in your face*... *jabs a fork into your ear*... That'll be $69.50... plus a 200% tip... plus shipping and handling... *eats ramen*... *staples the bill to your face*...


Another job well done... *goes out back to shoot dice*...
2009-12-29 [*Phoenix*]: Grr! *pulls fork out of ear and throws it like a throwing dagger at Mort* HEY! Come back here! *runs after Mort and pelts her in the back of the head with a salami sandwich* Ha! You've got condiments in you hair! *doubles over with laughter*
2009-12-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *raises a finger to make a point*... *decides to just eat ramen instead*...
2009-12-30 [*Phoenix*]: *ish confused for a moment*......*eats ramen with Mort*
2009-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Ramen? RAMEN?! *smacks Duke Devlin in the face for no particular reason*
2009-12-30 [Pillowthief]: *plucks the stapled receipt off of [*Phoenix*]'s head*


Hmm. You didn't order ramen. Are you eating Mort's ramen?


*smacks Misty1 in the face for no particular reason*
2010-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *some random guy covered in bombs bursts in through the window* "Allahu Ackbar!!"


Hey! What the heck is your problem, mister?! Now you climb back out that window and use the door like a civilized person!


*he sadly climbs out and then bursts back through the front door* "Allahu Ackbar!!!!" *he blows up a large portion of the diner and kills Misty in the process*


Much better... but there was no need for all that screaming... I don't know why we ever even relocated to Pakistan in the first place for... it's too freakin' hot here... *eats ramen with ice in it*... *fire from the blast ignites my leg*...
2010-01-01 [Pillowthief]: Who the hell is Allahu? I refuse to say every morning that "Godu is great", even if we are living in Pakistan.


He didn't even yell out the correct spelling for 'is great'- it should be 'akbar'. What the hell? Did we move to the unintelligent backward stupid part of Pakistan? These guys aren't even Muslim! The worship some Godu guy in a strange dialect!


And we moved here because your mom's Muslim.
2010-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: "Allahu ackbar derka derka!" *the school next door blows up*


Well, there's part of the problem right there...... they aren't getting enough fiber in their diets! *bakes bread in the shape of the prophet Muhammad*... *throws it at random people from the roof*... *a mob approaches the diner, carrying torches and pitchforks and grenade launchers*... look at them all! They love my bread! *takes a bite out of the bread Muhammad's face*
2010-01-01 [Paul Doyle]: IT'S A TRAP!
2010-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, Ackbar!
2010-01-02 [Pillowthief]: *Chews on Muhammad*


He doesn't taste half bad. Good thing we don't sell that bread to the customers.
2010-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *spreads Word© brand butter on Muhammad's face*... *accidentally stabs a hole through his eye*... Well, darn! *wads up the bread and throws it into the mob*... *gets another piece*...


...Customers?
2010-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Man... this butter is delicious! Spread the Word©!


*receives an endorsement check for five dollars*... sweet! *plays the claw machine on the roof*... *wins nothing*...
2010-01-02 [Pillowthief]: That machine never pays. Try the Paw machine next to it.


Besides, what would you do if you won an angry Muslim?
2010-01-02 [Queen of Hearts]: so i'm here...i took time out for revision to do this..so whats so great about being here?
2010-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, for one... everything. And for two- OH MY GOD! MY LEG'S ON FIRE!! *dramatically rips legs off*... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-03 [CrystalBlaze]: hello all
2010-01-03 [Queen of Hearts]: hmmm everything? *looks around not impressed much* really? hehe ... helllloo [CrystalBlaze]
2010-01-03 [Pillowthief]: Thankfully, we don't really care. *eats news-paper-colored-breakfast-sandwich's leg*
2010-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! I was gonna eat that... *sprouts new legs, because penguins totally have that ability*...
2010-01-04 [*Phoenix*]: *glomps Mort* Hiya!!! I am baaaacck! Woot Woo! Aren't you all so much happier that I have returned!!!!? *glows with pride*
2010-01-04 [*Phoenix*]: *introduces everyone to Bob* :0] <-- Bob


Everyone this is Bob; Bob this is everyone. Bob says Hi. Bob needs your help to become supreme overlord of the Snickers' Way. Help him is this quest! HELP HIM! *shoots fireballs at those who don't help Bob*
2010-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: >:0[ Bob is unhappy with your services as an employee. Bob says he wants you to clean out your desk and be out of here in the next hour, or he'll be calling security.
2010-01-04 [*Phoenix*]: Why Bob!? WHY!!!?? I thought I did all you asked! *grovels at Bob's feet for mercy*
2010-01-04 [twitchboy]: because there can only be one!!!! *Beheads Phoenix and absorbs his powers*
2010-01-04 [Pillowthief]: *catches fire from spontaneous lightning*
2010-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *steps over [Pillowthief]'s charred corpse*... *goes out back to shoot dice again*... *shoots the dice with a 9mm*... take that, dice!!
2010-01-05 [Pillowthief]: *steps in the door* Damn! Where'd that frikkin' doppelganger go? And what's with this Highlander music? It's SO 80s buttrock.
2010-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Or maybe you're his doppelganger! ...you think about that... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-05 [Devil in Me]: here i am what,are your next two wishes?
2010-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid deaf genie! I said bring me a Mormon, not a moron! ...morons aren't nearly as tasty as Mormons... oh well... *stuffs [Devil in Me] into the oven anyway*...
2010-01-06 [Pillowthief]: I think that sounded more like "Illiterate idiot" than moron. Should have microwaved that one.
2010-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I would, but our microwave was taken as evidence... If Misty hadn't blabbed to the cops, we'd still have our time machine/squirrel cooker... *eats ramen*... *eats oven baked squirrel*... it's just not the same!! *punches Misty's mom*
2010-01-06 [Devil in Me]: hey be nice! *punches Mortified Penguin's mom* *eats cheese fries* ewww i think that was a maggot! *shrugges and keeps on eating*
2010-01-06 [twitchboy]: hmm squirrel
2010-01-06 [Ninja Smurf]: What Inspires You? Go there! (shameless spamming)
2010-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you forgot the '?'... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-06 [Ninja Smurf]: I typed it, my laptop just doen't like to type fast so does mean things to me.. thanks though.
2010-01-06 [Ninja Smurf]: ha, I even added a link to the diner
2010-01-07 [Nekko fox]:   



Wow.
2010-01-07 [Goma]: that is intense...
2010-01-07 @Not logged in user@: 
2010-01-07 [Pillowthief]: I am too logged in! Piss off Elftron! Im not giving you any more money.
2010-01-07 [Sunrose]: XD
2010-01-07 [Nekko fox]:   




Look at it from across the room and up close.
2010-01-07 [Pillowthief]: She never looked so... old.
2010-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: She needs to shave her teeth... but, well... who doesn't these days.
2010-01-08 [Pillowthief]: I did it just the other day. It was exhilarating.
2010-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm trying to grow a teethstache right now... *combs teeth*...
2010-01-08 [Pillowthief]: Stop, you'll end up looking like Misty here pretty soon.
2010-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not growing a beard, a uni-brow, nose hair, a strange growth, some cold sores, and a bald spot... I'm just growing a teethstache (or is it toothstache?). But, maybe it is time I shave this thing... it's making my teeth itch... *scratches teeth with a fork*... *puts the fork back into the fork pile in the corner*...
2010-01-08 [Pillowthief]: Dammit, I just washed those!
2010-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: But... we haven't had running water here for months! ...or even flowing water for that matter!
2010-01-08 [Paul Doyle]: I wonder what the birthday special is going to be like. Dare I ask? Happy birthday, Mort. :3
2010-01-08 [Sunrose]: :O troll panderer!
2010-01-08 [Pillowthief]: ...I somehow missed that reference.
2010-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: I believe [Sunrose]'s comment is one made in jest referring to Paul Doyle's insulting of her 'pandering to the trolls'. This was back when Pauly was still working for the CIA and Sunrose was still a prostitute, living on the streets. However, once it became known that Paul was secretly stealing drugs from the CIA's drug storage facility, John, George, Ringo, and Squiggy decided it was best that he left the band. Sad and broken, Paul found company with Sunrose one stormy night. Little did he know, she had given him herpes. But he had given her something much, much worse... self respect. With her newfound respect, Sunrose decided to get a real job. Of course, her pimp (hedda) didn't like this idea. He tracked down Paul and smashed him over the head with Elftron. Elftron, unfortunately, was badly damaged in that battle. The doctors never thought he would walk again, but, one bright, summer day, he did. He walked. Then he walked some more. Then he tripped and fell off a bridge. And that, my friends, is where potato chips come from.


Now please give me five dollars, so I can eat today. *slowly rocks back and forth*
2010-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*eats a cricket off the ground*... *drinks rain water off the streets*...
2010-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Freakin' homeless people! Get away from here! *breaks a broom over [Sagacious Turkey]'s head*


Get a job!
2010-01-09 [Paul Doyle]: LMAO!!!!!
2010-01-09 [Pillowthief]: I thought he already had a job? He's supposed to have been working here, doing some 'keeping of creatures', whatever that means.


*checks payroll*


Hmm, no- seems like he was let go a couple years ago and never told. I'll just fix this little glitch in our paperwork- it'll save us some money.


And stay away from my rain water! Get a job!
2010-01-09 [Paul Doyle]: *runs over random rivals with stolen, rusting shopping cart from a mom-and-pop corner grocery that went out of business years ago*(
2010-01-09 [Pillowthief]: Stay away from my shopping carts!


Freakin' bums! They take everything!
2010-01-09 [Sunrose]: Nice story :P
2010-01-09 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-01-09 [Pillowthief]: They took my short wave radio too! Those bastards! *shakes first*
2010-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: And even my hat! That does it. These bums have to go. *digs through the closet*... *tosses away a flamethrower*... here it is! ...*eats a cup of ramen*...
2010-01-10 [Nekko fox]: Hey Mort. I got something for you. This is so...fucking...horrible. I think you might enjoy going over this trash pile fan-fic.


http://myimmortalrehost.webs.com/chapters122.htm
2010-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I made it all the way to:


"What's up Draco?" I asked.


"Nothing." he said shyly.


Not nearly enough violent rape. I was hoping Dumbledore would whip out his hard, 12-inch, oak wand and start smacking the first years in the face with it... that would have made for a delightful story... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-10 [Nekko fox]: He does. Chapter 38.
2010-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I see... well that's just disturbing. Even more so than the kid humored Barry Cotter and the Sorcerer's Bone... much more so. ...*shivers*... *eats ramen to calm the gloomies*...
2010-01-10 [Nekko fox]: Nice.
2010-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Not really... terrible actually... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-10 [Nekko fox]: Meh
2010-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said! ...so I killed her for being insolent... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-10 [Paul Doyle]: Ooh, he has a tin-foil hat! If he has loose tooth braces, she can use the slack to tune in radio broadcasts from Mozambique and Timbuktu, and god only knows where else.
2010-01-10 [Paul Doyle]:   
2010-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Where'd you get that picture of my dad from?!
2010-01-10 [Pillowthief]: He stole my only other shopping cart! That bastard!


And I will say!


...


That [moira hawthorne] has lemon porn!
2010-01-10 [Sunrose]: Damn you, made me look for it :O
2010-01-10 [Pillowthief]: Pervert.
2010-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not a racist or anything, but I think lemon porn is much hotter than lime porn. However, it's still not nearly as hot as pepper porn! (ha ha. get it? peppers are hot! laugh, you bastard. oh, you don't think it's funny, huh? just for that, I'm killing your dog/mother.)
2010-01-11 [Sunrose]: Ha..ha.. :P
2010-01-11 [Nekko fox]:   


Killing his dog would be a mercy.
2010-01-11 [Pillowthief]: Looks like its already in the second stages of decomposition...
2010-01-11 [Paul Doyle]: OK, here's what gets me about conspiracy theorists who wear aluminum foil caps in a weird effort to block the government's radio-wave mind-control psychic vibrations . . . or whatever the hell it is they think they are shielding themselves against:


If they walk out into a vivid thunderstorm and then get struck down by lightning bolts attracted to the aluminum foil, do they still blame the thunderstorm on a government conspiracy, and not personal ignorance of elementary science?


Go ahead, Wal-Mart . . . keep doing rollbacks on aluminum foil to benefit those who choose to wear the foil on their heads (instead of using it for food prep and such, like the rest of us). Wal-Mart, you'll be doing the rest of the world a favor . . . thanks for the conspiracy!


*takes a shower and a nap*
2010-01-11 [Paul Doyle]: Oh, and by the way . . . *does a horrid Robert Plant impersonation*:
________________


Asked sweet mama, Let me be her kid
She said, "You might get hurt if you don't keep it hid"


Well I know my baby, If I see her in the dark
I said I know my rider, If I see her in the dark


Now, I goin' to Rosedale, Take my rider by my side
Still barrelhouse, If it's on the riverside, yeah
I know my baby, Lord, I said, "is really sloppy drunk"
I know my mama, Lord, a brownskin, but she ain't no plum


See my baby, tell her, Tell her hurry home
Had no lovin', since my baby been gone
See my baby, Tell hurry on home
I ain't had, Lord, my right mind, Since my rider's been gone


Hey, she promises, She's my rider
I wanna tell you, She's my rider
I know you're mine, She's my rider
She ain't but sixteen, But she's my rider


I'm goin' to Rosedale, Take my rider by side
Anybody argue with me man, I'll keep them satisfied
Well, see my baby, tell her, Tell her the shape I'm in
Ain't had no lovin', Lord, since you know when


Spoken: Why don't you come into my kitchen


She's a kindhearted lady. She studies evil all the time
She's a kindhearted woman. She studies evil all the time


Squeeze my lemon 'til the juice runs down my leg
Squeeze it so hard, I'll fall right out of bed
Squeeze my lemon, 'til the juice runs down my leg


Spoken: I wonder if you know what I'm talkin' about


Oh, but the way that you squeeze it girl
I swear I'm gonna fall right out of bed


She's a good rider
She's my kindhearted lady
I'm gonna take my rider by my side
I said her front teeth are lined with gold
She's gotta mortgage on my body, got a lien on my soul
She's my brownskin sugar plum...
2010-01-11 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-01-11 [Paul Doyle]: *finds some clubs*
2010-01-11 [Sunrose]: Perhaps they keep active track of the weather report, as part of their paranoia-thing and all. At least, I never heard about someone being struck by lightning because they were wearing a tin foil cap thingy.


That seal looks asleep to me :O
2010-01-11 [Devil in Me]: i can get very paranoid. please quite staring at meeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2010-01-11 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-01-11 [Sunrose]: Blargh xP
2010-01-11 [Pillowthief]: You are right, the seal DOES look kind of asleep. Maybe I should change it to 'Your shitty thread killed put this poor innocent baby seal to slee'- JESUS MOTHER MARY AND JOESEPH!! WHAT IS THAT?!?


Eeeeehhhhhhhhhghgh. *convulsively shivers*


  

2010-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Now you guys are posting pictures of my mom?! ...where do you keep getting these pictures from?! ...*locks doors*...
2010-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *being that we're still apparently located in Pakistan, some Muhammad's Witnesses show up at the door with some Qur'āns*... "Hi! We'd like to talk to you about Allah. Can we come in?"... no, darn it! I told you to leave!! ..."That's unfortunate, sir. ALLAHU AKBAR!!"... *they attempt to detonated themselves, but merely catch on fire instead*... *slams door*... This is the third time that's happened today! ...*eats ramen*...
2010-01-12 [Ninja Smurf]: Thats why I use Muhabegone.. the repelent that repels all Muhammad's Witnesses! Get some today! Only $999.99 per one .0001 OZ Bottle!
2010-01-12 [Pillowthief]: Hmph. Who is this Jahova guy anyways? Probabaly in league with Allahu.
2010-01-12 [Devil in Me]: pillowtheif why are you posting pic of startrek?
2010-01-12 [nokaredes]: Why shouldn't he?!
2010-01-12 [Devil in Me]: i was just wondering> you know that guy looks an aweful lot like my grandpa< you know if he were bald>
2010-01-12 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-01-12 [Nekko fox]: His Cthulhu face will eat your grand-father stand-in.
2010-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Foolish old man! You can't beat Nannerpus!


  

2010-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: You ever been bitch slapped by eight tentacles at once?
2010-01-12 [Ninja Smurf]: umm... I see only six tentacles
2010-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said!
2010-01-12 [Nekko fox]: Jdogg:Hey
QT-Pie:Hey
Jdogg:whats goin on
QT-Pie:Nothing. Who are you?
Jdogg:Jdogg. Wanna cyber?
QT-Pie:what does that mean?
Jdogg:what are you wearing?
QT-Pie:T-shirt. Jeans.
Jdogg:Garter belt?
QT-Pie:Ummm...no.
Jdogg:Are we gonna cyber or not?
QT-Pie: uh, okay.
Jdogg:Sweet, I start by rubbing your ass all around. You love this.
Jdogg: You're wet already. I can smell your pussy stink from here.
QT-Pie: WHAT?!
Jdogg: I execute standing position 12 from the Kama Sutra. Passion fills the room. Your head is close to the ceiling fan.
Jdogg:You leave everything to jdogg.
Jdogg:I am completely inside of you. You are my dick puppet. I put on a little play.
QT-Pie:This is weird. I should go.
Jdogg: I drop you on the ground, and lay a stripe down your back.
QT-Pie: A stripe?
Jdogg: I need a sandwich.
QT-Pie: You're a freak.
Jdogg: I was great. You loved it.
2010-01-12 [Nekko fox]: bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They f*cking charge your ass.
j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.
bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.
bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli3: thats it.
bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.
2010-01-12 [Goma]: god I've seen that before but its still hilarious
2010-01-12 [Nekko fox]: VictimX_27: Hi there!
cheesedog: HEYA!
VictimX_27: What u up 2?
cheesedog: Nice English.
cheesedog: Did you learn that on the short bus?
VictimX_27: Get fucked
cheesedog: I'm just joking relax
cheesedog: What's your name?
VictimX_27: Whats yours?
cheesedog: I asked you first.
VictimX_27: I asked you second
cheesedog: Did I time just warp to middle school?
VictimX_27: huh
cheesedog: Never mind. My name is Johnny
cheesedog: Johnny Cheesedog
VictimX_27: Thats not your real name
cheesedog: Why isn't that my real name?
VictimX_27: No one has the name Cheesedog as a last name
cheesedog: Well I do. Whats wrong with it?
VictimX_27: Nothin i suppose
VictimX_27: Is that your real pic in that av?
cheesedog: Yes it is
VictimX_27: Very handsome
cheesedog: Thanks
VictimX_27: You kinda look like eminem
cheesedog: Fuck you.
VictimX_27: HEY! I meant that in a good way
VictimX_27: I think eminem is hot!
cheesedog: Oh. You think I'm hot?
VictimX_27: Yeah
cheesedog: What do you look like?
cheesedog: Do you have a pic?
VictimX_27: I don't show my picture to anyone
cheesedog: Why not?
VictimX_27: Cause I'm ugly
cheesedog: I won't make fun of you
VictimX_27: Its not that. I just don't like my looks
cheesedog: So you have no self-esteem, huh?
cheesedog: Is that what you're saying?
VictimX_27: I just don't think I'm pretty
cheesedog: Let me be the judge of that.
VictimX_27: Nahhh
cheesedog: Then describe yourself.
VictimX_27: Why do u wanna know what I look like?
cheesedog: Because I think you're nice
cheesedog: I want to picture you in my head while I'm talking to you.
VictimX_27: LMAO!! You don't want 2 picture me. Trust me
cheesedog: Why not?
VictimX_27: I told you. I'm ugly.
cheesedog: Well... I think you're beautiful on the inside.
VictimX_27: You don't even know me
cheesedog: I'm a pretty good judge of character
VictimX_27: Then why do u need 2 see me?
cheesedog: I just wanted to know thats all
cheesedog: If you aren't comfortable with it... thats fine.
VictimX_27: You don't understand
cheesedog: Is it that bad?
VictimX_27: YESSSSS
cheesedog: Ok then. I'm gonna picture you as Weezy from the Jeffersons.
cheesedog: She is the bomb!
cheesedog: She makes me hot just thinking about her!
VictimX_27: Wheezy?
cheesedog: Yep. Weezy.
VictimX_27: Who is that?
cheesedog: George's wife.
VictimX_27: Who is george
cheesedog: George Jefferson. From the Jeffersons.
cheesedog: Are you fucking deaf?
VictimX_27: Who are the Jeffersons?
cheesedog: Oh lord. Here we go
VictimX_27: wut?
cheesedog: You don't know who the Jeffersons are?
VictimX_27: Should I?
cheesedog: Yes.
VictimX_27: Well I don't.
cheesedog: FISH DONT FRY IN THE KITCHEN! BEANS DONT BURN ON THE GREEEELL...
VictimX_27: huhhh?
cheesedog: TOOK A WHOOOOLE LOTTA LU UH VINNNN. JUST TO GET UP THAT HEEEELL
VictimX_27: Wut the hell are you saying?
cheesedog: Hold on a second
cheesedog: Here you go. *PIC*
VictimX_27: Thats her?
cheesedog: Yep
VictimX_27: I don't look anything like that
cheesedog: SHUT UP! You're ruining my fantasy!
VictimX_27: LOL. You're funny.
cheesedog: What's funny?
VictimX_27: u r
cheesedog: I'm glad I entertain you
VictimX_27: me 2
cheesedog: So if you don't look like Weezy, what do you look like?
VictimX_27: u don't give up do u?
cheesedog: Never
VictimX_27: I'm the exact opposite of her
cheesedog: ???
VictimX_27: I'm very white
cheesedog: Thats cool, my white anti-soul sista'
VictimX_27: LOL
cheesedog: I can dig white chicks too, I guess.
VictimX_27: I'm whiter than most
cheesedog: really?
VictimX_27: I'm an albino
cheesedog: a what?
VictimX_27: u don't know what that is?
cheesedog: I've heard the word before
VictimX_27: I have no pigment in my skin, eyes or hair
VictimX_27: So I'm all white
cheesedog: This is bullshit
VictimX_27: I'm serious!
VictimX_27: You've never seen an albino before?
cheesedog: No. Where do they live? Albinia?
VictimX_27: No, we live all over.
cheesedog: Then how come I've never seen any
VictimX_27: Lucky I suppose
cheesedog: Send me your picture. I wanna know what an albino looks like.
VictimX_27: I'll send you a picture of one but not me
cheesedog: Ok
VictimX_27: Here u go *PIC*
cheesedog: Whoa. Thats freaky
VictimX_27: See why I don't send my picture out?
cheesedog: there's nothing wrong with it.
cheesedog: It doesn't make you ugly
cheesedog: This chick is kind of hot actually.
VictimX_27: Thank u
cheesedog: No problem
cheesedog: Her, not you. I don't know what you look like.
VictimX_27: Are you gonna be on in 3 hours?
cheesedog: Yes
VictimX_27: I have to go to the mall with my sister
VictimX_27: Will you be here when I get back?
cheesedog: S ure. Then I'll sex you up.
VictimX_27: Gee thanks. LOL
cheesedog: I'm serious
VictimX_27: We'll see.
cheesedog: Yes we will.
VictimX_27: Bye for now!
cheesedog: Make sure you wear some sunscreen.
VictimX_27: 


About 3 hours later...


VictimX_27: HEY!
cheesedog: Hello there
VictimX_27: I'm back
cheesedog: Have fun at the mall?
VictimX_27: Yeah. I got some new shoes
cheesedog: Interesting
VictimX_27: Not really. Just shoes
cheesedog: You ready to be sexed up now?
VictimX_27: LOL
cheesedog: Is that a yes?
VictimX_27: Could be
VictimX_27:
cheesedog: HOT DAMN!
cheesedog: I gently suck your nipples
cheesedog: I feel them get hard then I jam my hand down your..
VictimX_27: WOAH! Slow down cowboy
cheesedog: Why?
VictimX_27: I'm not just gonna cyber with you if thats all you want
cheesedog: What do you mean?
VictimX_27: You're not going to ignore me later are you?
cheesedog: Of course not.
cheesedog: I like you.
VictimX_27: I don't even know how old you are.
cheesedog: I'm 27. Now....
cheesedog: I gently massage your breasts with my rough hands
cheesedog: I roll your nipples between my fingers
VictimX_27: WAIT!
cheesedog: They get hard again... what?
VictimX_27: Don't you wanna know anything about me first?
VictimX_27: Like what I like?
cheesedog: Oh yeah. Sure. Hurry up.
VictimX_27: That didn't sound convincing.
cheesedog: YES I WANNA KNOW WHAT YOU LIKE RIGHT NOW!!!
VictimX_27: Now u r being a smartass
VictimX_27: Just give me a minute
cheesedog: ok
VictimX_27: I'm back
cheesedog: np
VictimX_27: thank you
cheesedog: So what do you like?
VictimX_27: Ummmm being licked
cheesedog: Where?
VictimX_27: Everywhere
cheesedog: Any place in particular?
VictimX_27: uhhh yeah
cheesedog: tell me
VictimX_27: on my clit
cheesedog: OK!
cheesedog: NOW YOU'RE TALKIN!
VictimX_27: I also like being done from behind
cheesedog: Ooooooohhhh.
cheesedog: Ok. Check this out.
cheesedog: We're in an abandoned building.
cheesedog: No is around. Its all quiet.
VictimX_27: Uh huh
cheesedog: I gently unbutton your pants and slide my hand across your clit
cheesedog: You get all warm and juicy.
cheesedog: I slip your panties down and continue to massage your pussy
VictimX_27: oooohh mmmm
cheesedog: I place my mouth on your pussy as I eat you from behind
cheesedog: I wiggle my tounge around across your moist hole
VictimX_27: yessss
cheesedog: I cover your ears with my hands as I eat you.
cheesedog: Egon and Ray sneak in from the back.
cheesedog: *Powering up Proton packs*
VictimX_27: ???
cheesedog: Then... Egon BLASTS your pasty white ass!!
cheesedog: POW!! BZZZZZTTTTTPHTTTTTT!!!
cheesedog: Winston and Peter set up the containment trap....
VictimX_27: WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT!!!
cheesedog: You wiggle around in the proton streams buck naked
cheesedog: The streams almost cross! Look out!!
cheesedog: Peter smacks you across the chin with his gun
cheesedog: They open the trap and it sucks your pale ass in!
VictimX_27: This isn't funny johnny!
cheesedog: SHUT UP! YOUR CAUGHT!
cheesedog: **puts you in the containment area**
cheesedog: Slimer is in there too..
VictimX_27: YOU ARE A FUCKING ASSHOLE!
cheesedog: I SAID SHUT THE FUCK UP!
cheesedog: Now...Slimer sticks his green, slimey cock in your pigmentless ass.
cheesedog: **HE SLIMES YOU!**
VictimX_27: Never talk to me again!
cheesedog: He cums all over your hair... but no one notices cause its the same color
VictimX_27: FUCK YOUUUU
cheesedog: He eats a powdered donut!
VictimX_27: SHUT UP AND FUCK YOUUUU!!!!!
cheesedog: o wait! It was your hand, you scary, white whore!
VictimX_27: LEAVE ME ALONE!!!
cheesedog: Chill out, Casper. You're trapped, I said.
cheesedog: Slimer goes to lick your clit.
cheesedog: But there is already slime on your it!!
cheesedog: Slimer thinks you are a cheater and gets jealous!!
cheesedog: HE RIPS YOUR WHITE TITS OFF!
VictimX_27: FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!
cheesedog: **Plays volleyball with them**
VictimX_27: 






My favorite.
2010-01-12 [Goma]: lol that guy is such a dick though
2010-01-12 [Paul Doyle]: I sense a conspiracy. :P



2010-01-12 [Pillowthief]: http://zapatopi.net/afdb/build.html
http://zapatopi.net/afdb/



Eat your heart out, Mel Gibson.
2010-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats Mel Gibson's heart out*... ha! ...beat 'im to it.
2010-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: And you call those entertaining conversations?! ...check out Mort says stuff!
2010-01-13 [Nekko fox]: Nope. Still prefer the other guy.
2010-01-13 [nokaredes]: tl;dr I did look at those hat instructions, though. :D
2010-01-13 [Sunrose]: lawl@convo
2010-01-13 [Pillowthief]: 
2010-01-13 [Pillowthief]:


 hey jaimer
 hey
 i loves you sweet ass, baby
 excuse me?
 we gonna get together an fuck tonight
 right?
 You stupid shit
 ?
 What?
 This is toby johnson, right
 you know it is, duh.
 I'm doing tech support on Jamie's computer
 I'm her father, you little shit
 hah!
 what's
 your joking right/
 I am. I know where you live. I'm coming over to your house now. Don't try to run, I'll find you.
 Jamie, it's not funny
 Jaime?
 You're screwed, dude. Her dad's psycho
 fuck
 Fuck!
 best run, boy
*** Toller has quit IRC (Quit: )
 You're an evil bitch, Jamie.
 lol
 brilliant... but evil
 he's an asshole anyways
2010-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Who hasn't read that one? ...*eats ramen*... *puts on robe and wizard hat*...
2010-01-13 [Devil in Me]: hey pillowtheif you know i had a wet dream about you right?






See we were climbing a tree and you fell out i pissed my pants laughing.
2010-01-13 [nokaredes]: I have family in Idaho! So now, three reasons to visit that state! (Those being family, to visit Pillowthief, and because I've never been there.) In other news, Mortimer, I request your presence on Facebook, as I sent you a message there, and am too lazy to copy it here.
2010-01-13 [Chimes]: I'm sensing Bash.org :O
2010-01-13 [Devil in Me]: okay i'm so lost who is mortimer?
2010-01-13 [nokaredes]: Mortimer = Mort = Mortified Penguin = [Mortified Penguin].
2010-01-13 [Devil in Me]: oooooh okay i get it. i thought htere was someone called mortimer on here and i missed it.
2010-01-13 [nokaredes]: Nah, I've called [Mortified Penguin] Mortimer for as long as he's had that username... I just haven't been on ET in months...
2010-01-13 [Devil in Me]: ahhh! makes sense.
2010-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You know, Idaho isn't nearly as fun as Alabama is...
2010-01-13 [Pillowthief]: Why are you trying to come here?!? ITS A TRAP!




Help me get out!
2010-01-13 [Aliz]: Boo :D
2010-01-13 [Pillowthief]: Its chains fetters my feet and stops my hand. You cannot get out. You can never get out.
2010-01-13 [Aliz]: ...YAY :D
2010-01-13 [Pillowthief]: Oh. My. God.


Mort is in college?!?
God help us all!
2010-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Fine then! *drops out*
2010-01-14 [*Phoenix*]: Bad Mort! Don't drop out!! *pushes Mort back to college*
2010-01-14 [twitchboy]: beaty school drop out
2010-01-14 [nokaredes]: I'm not trying to come up there. If I were trying I'd have already been there :P
2010-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, I never dropped out of beaty school. In fact, I graduated and got a doctorate. *beats Nok in the face with the diploma*
2010-01-14 [Pillowthief]: What now? Beaty grad school?
2010-01-14 [Devil in Me]: *sings a song from Grease* "beauty school drop out go back to high school."
2010-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Beauty school? What does that have to do with anything? ...*eats ramen*... wait... this isn't ramen! ...*spits out Nok's hair*...
2010-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Ptewie! ...disgusting! ...I've had horse that tasted better! ...sweet, sweet horse...
2010-01-15 [Pillowthief]: Add a little Horsey-sause, yeah yeah. Good stuff.
2010-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: And maybe a little horseradish... and some horsestershire sauce...
2010-01-15 [nokaredes]: I thought horsey sauce had horseradish in it... also, ow. *ices face*
2010-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what they want you to think!
2010-01-15 [Devil in Me]: nobody think anymore you should know that.
2010-01-15 [Pillowthief]: *gets dumb look on his face*


What what?
2010-01-16 [Nekko fox]: Two words:


Ass. Lazer.
2010-01-16 [Pillowthief]: Butt. Plug.
2010-01-16 [Ninja Smurf]: Put all that together and you get Mort's favorite toy!
2010-01-16 [Pillowthief]: An Ass-Butt Lazer-Plug?


Sounds counter-productive.
Unlike Counter-Strike.


Except when noobz use WTF H4X that shoot you in the head.
Then, its counter productive.
2010-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn those expert noobz and their mad skills... *scratches ass-butt with a fork from the fork pile*...
2010-01-16 [Pillowthief]: Damn it! Would you stop that!


Makes Misty clean our dirty dishes, again.
2010-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: How's that going to make them any cleaner?! Make Sunrose clean them. She's a little hairy sure, but still pretty clean.
2010-01-16 [Sunrose]: I'm not touching any of that :p
2010-01-17 [Pillowthief]: Especially without pants.
2010-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm online via my ps3! Suck it, pillowthief! ...*eats ramen*...
2010-01-18 [Pillowthief]: Have you even been online with your Wii- Wait. I better stop here, you're going to make a joke anyways and its safer not to give you any more ammunition.




Crap.
2010-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! ...Wii...
2010-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Chess Tournament!
2010-01-19 [Nekko fox]: Lies.
2010-01-19 [Pillowthief]: Kinda looks like chess to me.


Cake looks like lies.
That doesn't look like cake.


Now, where did I put my Companion Cube?
2010-01-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Guess who's back from the dead...? Me that's who!!!
2010-01-19 [Pillowthief]:
  



You are NOT my Companion Cube.
2010-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: She is a cube though...
2010-01-19 [Devil in Me]: woot woot! party over here. break out the moldy cake and butt forks.
2010-01-19 [Pillowthief]: Lies! The Cake is a Lie!!
2010-01-19 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: The pie, however, is quite delicious. Except the cabbage pie... I don't know why we ever even thought that would be a good idea... *shakes head*... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-19 [Pillowthief]: It doesn't look so good either...
  

2010-01-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Looks like he's been eating cabbage pie.
2010-01-20 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-01-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I like the flabergasted pic. Oh by the way I think I have officially lost my mind, because I actually missed Mort.
2010-01-20 [Pillowthief]: I seriously doubt he missed you, so I hope that your nostalgic feeling is short lived.
2010-01-20 [Sunrose]: xD
2010-01-20 [Pillowthief]: Very, very, short lived.
2010-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Missed who now? ...*eats ramen*...
2010-01-20 [Devil in Me]: you silly!
2010-01-20 [Nekko fox]: Only the damned miss Satan.
2010-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Arr! Pancake island is the place to be! The sweetest syrup on the seven seas! Feels so yummy in my tum-tum-tummy! *a large sign suddenly falls on me, crushing my internal organs*... *hemorrhaging ensues*...
2010-01-21 [Araglas]: *drags in a bag with blood dripping from it* Ok got some dead bodies, about to make some zombie burgers!
2010-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... I think they had to actually be zombies first... you can't just kill people and cook them... that's... illegal... *pokes the bag with a fork from the fork pile*...
2010-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *violently jabs a fork into Misty's face*... didn't you read the sign on the wall?!! It clearly says- *points at a large hole in the wall*... uh... hmm... You know... I could have sworn there used to be a sign and some drywall there... oh well. Sorry about that! *violently removes the fork*... *puts duct tape on Misty's face to cover the fork hole*...
2010-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...where the heck did I put that wall segment...? ...*scratches neck beard*... *shrugs*... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-21 [Pillowthief]: Blagraragagghahaaagha.
2010-01-21 [Pillowthief]: 'Scuse me.
2010-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry 'bout i- holy crap! Why is half your brain dangling out of the side of your head? That can't be good... *hands you some duct tape*...
2010-01-22 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-01-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: What's the point to that pic.
2010-01-22 [Pillowthief]: If you have been reading the last comments (like normal Bob's Diner people usually do)- its a depiction of half my brain dangling out the side of my head, courtesy of Don Hertzfelt's Rejected.


Add a few slow motion kung fu sounds and a flying pig with tentacles, and its hilarious.
2010-01-22 [Pillowthief]: Oooh, by the way Misty1, I'd just like you to know that our making good ol' fashion fun of you has now been extended, thanks to the Book of Face.


*Virtual high-five's the news-paper-colored-breakfast-sandwich*
2010-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Ow! My virtual wrist! *tries to eat ramen, but it turns out that my spoon is too big*
2010-01-22 [Devil in Me]: book of face? what the hell is that?
2010-01-22 [nokaredes]: Haha! Oh wow.
2010-01-22 [Pillowthief]: I AM A CONSUMER WHORE!!! And how.
2010-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: And Misty's a whore who consumes stuff! And how.
2010-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: As we can clearly see here from her display picture, she swallows stuff through the mouth. *uses a laser pointer to indicate the mouth area*


  

2010-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I apologize for the gratuitous nudity.
2010-01-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Pillowthief, please don't call me Misty1, just say Misty.


Oh, and to [Mortified Penguin] for comparing me to a whale I shall butt rape you with a pointy stick.
2010-01-23 [Nekko fox]: I. Am> A BANANA!
2010-01-23 [Nekko fox]: Your watching the Family Learning Channel. And now, angry ticks fire out of my nipples.
2010-01-23 [Pillowthief]: My Anus is Bleeding.
2010-01-23 [Nekko fox]: Ever read My Immortal, the worst fan fiction on the internet and created by Tara Gilesbie? Here is a short rendition of the first couple chapters.


  

2010-01-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: That is so fucked up.
2010-01-24 [Pillowthief]: Wow. That is kinda fucked up. Kinda like your mom.
2010-01-24 [Pillowthief]:
  





For those that don't get Zelda humor, that was a
BUUURRRNN
2010-01-24 [the wonderfall-man]: That was funny. Lisen to this song. It's realy good.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1JSBhI_0at0
2010-01-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh huh, riiight...
2010-01-25 [Pillowthief]: DO NOT ROLL YOUR EYES AT RATM!


That's better suited for mayonnaise and fat kids at baseball parks.
2010-01-25 [Pillowthief]: DO NOT ROLL YOUR EYES AT ME!








I know you did. Just now.
2010-01-25 [Sunrose]: *rolls eyes*
2010-01-25 [Pillowthief]: Darn you Suuuuunrooooose!!!!



2010-01-25 [Sunrose]: It's miss Sunrose to you :)
2010-01-25 [Pillowthief]: Darn you miss Suuuuunrooooose!!!!



2010-01-25 [Sunrose]: Wheemz :P
2010-01-26 [Nekko fox]: Lollerskates are ridden on the roflcopter while drinking lmaonade.


Mmm, lmaonade....




Put that on the menu.
2010-01-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's funny Nekko.


Hey Miss Sunrose. *waves*
2010-01-26 [Pillowthief]: 
2010-01-26 [Sunrose]: Nice comic btw, I sent it to [Isilando] x)
Also, hi [~Crimson Angel~] :)
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: lmaonade popsicles go in the freezer!! *shoves misty into the freezer and locks it*
2010-01-26 [Devil in Me]: unlock the freezer now!
2010-01-26 [Nekko fox]: *watches with bemused silence*
2010-01-26 [Devil in Me]: come one guys why you gotta be so mean?
2010-01-26 [Nekko fox]: Because God programmed us that way. Didn't you God?


*God gives them a thumbs up and a smirk*
2010-01-26 [Devil in Me]: wat eva
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, hey G! I didn't know you ate here at Bob's Diner! ...that's a damn good endorsement if I ever saw one... *eats ramen*... *charges God $20 for a piece of bread and some water*...
2010-01-26 [Ninja Smurf]: Sorry Mort.. I'm nt God.. Common mistake though.
2010-01-26 [Nekko fox]: Not you NS, ...hm, ns...nos...nitrous oxide...laughing gas...batman...joker...being serious...serious...cereal...




COCOA PUFFS!
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Rice Krispies, bitch! *smashes a box of Cocoa Puffs*
2010-01-26 [Devil in Me]: i'm cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs!
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm mentally unstable for Corn Flakes!
2010-01-26 [Devil in Me]: LOL!!! Cocoa Puffs are so much better though.
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: SHUT UP!! GIVE ME YOUR ******* CORN FLAKES!!!! *stabs [Devil in Me] repeatedly with a spatula*
2010-01-26 [Pillowthief]: I miss my Boo Berry. That or his best friend Count Chocula.
2010-01-26 [Pillowthief]: Wait... 'stabs'?
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: What about Lieutenant Colonel Crunch? (he got promoted)
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm mentally unstable. Don't question my stabbing methods.
2010-01-26 [Pillowthief]: Well, he bought a 'parrot' from an unsavory gentleman and it turned out to be a toucan. The crazy coot actually listened to the bird and 'followed his nose' right off the port side. Unfortunately his new colonel hat wasn't as effective of a flotation device as his last one, so he drowned. 'Sam', as the toucan was named, took over his ship and sold his cereal company with several clever accounts of bribery and some very well forged documents.
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: That's why you should never trust a toucan.
2010-01-26 [Pillowthief]: Or drug dealers.




Or drug dealing parrots.




Or sugar dispensing toucans.
2010-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Or sugar dispensing drug dealers with parrots on their shoulders. Those are especially bad.
2010-01-27 [Pillowthief]: Fucking ninjas.
2010-01-27 [the wonderfall-man]: Or a sugar despensing drug dealing pirate ninjas with a parrot of drugs and sugar on there shoulders. They'll stalk you and rape you in your sleep...I mean you, Mort. Don't trust Mort cause he's one of them. He smoked the parrot till it was gone...he shared it with me.
2010-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: First of all, it was a chicken. Not a parrot. And secondly, I don't know what you're talking about.
2010-01-27 [Pillowthief]: Stab him with the spatula! *makes vigorous arm gestures*
2010-01-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I should stab Mortified Penguin with that pointy rape stick.


Hi [Devil in Me]! *waves* I like Daquries!
2010-01-27 [Nekko fox]: If you Try, the Battletoads will stop you!


  

2010-01-27 [Devil in Me]: i want michael jackson's nose to go please.
2010-01-27 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: ?
2010-01-27 [Ninja Smurf]: Oh I'm pretty sure that his nose, and most of the rest of him are already through the recycling plant by now... :)
2010-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Battletoads? I love that game! I can never seem to find it at Gamestop though...
2010-01-28 [Pillowthief]: I like da queries too. They're kind of like interrobangs, as Nok has recently found out.
2010-01-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh really now?
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *crickets chirp*
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Get back in the soup, dang it! *knocks the crickets into a boiling pot*... *they screech*... why am I always making some kind of soup anyway...? ...nobody ever orders it and I always have to throw it out/store it in the closet until it turns into meatloaf.
2010-01-28 [Devil in Me]: i'll take some soup.
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: And speaking of interrobanging Nok's mom, whatever happened to that gang of chickens that used to roam through here...? ...*eats ramen loaf*...
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws boiling cricket/slug soup in [Devil in Me]'s face*... Please address all complaints you may have of Bob's Diner, in regards to the service and/or food, to Misty in the form of irrational violence. *hands you a complimentary tire iron* Thank you. Have a good day!
2010-01-28 [Nekko fox]: H͍̰͉̖̮e̴̻̪̹̳̰͉̥͉̤͢ ̩͈͖͇͔̖̟̲i͏̩̻͓̬̗̖̝͠s͉̝̳̮̘̖̣̥͟ ͏̨̬̙͉̟̮̤͟ͅt̶͖͚̳͈̹̤͞ͅh͓̱͕̲̱̖e̵̱͕̘ ̙̘͙̲̮̀o̘̩̤̣̟̼͚n͓͍͓̕͞e̴̗͟ ̳̬̙̞͈͞b͖͇̤̖̀ͅe̡͉̦̰̪h̨̲̦̬̲̫̼̕͢i̭͎n̶̗͔͝d̛̛͇̫̱ ̱̜͘͡ṭ̸̲̘̼̲͇͢ḩ̱̤̲̠̤̟̠͘͜e̢̛͍̭̲̬̼͘ ̷̜͉̫͎w͏̸͎̹a̸̯̻̙l̛͓͍͇̬͓̲͟l̵̼̮͝.͔́ ̞͚͜͞Z̹̖̻a̶̮̩̥͈̼̭̲̱͟͢ḽ̤̪͚̲g̸͏̱͓̥̘̹̖̗o͘҉̻͉̯͇̙̮̮͕͘.̶̝̩̤͟ ̵͍͓͚̱̥̱͙͟ͅH̛͙ȩ͙̝̕͜ ̵̫̩̤̫c͚͇̲̪̝̯͢͡o͎̥͖͎͈̖̖̯m̼̰͎͡e͎̜̞̦̹͘s͚̙̞̭̟͜ͅ.̷̖̣̘̘͔̝͚͇̝́
͎̗͔͍̮̦͜H̲͍̼̣̟͎͡e͓̘̟͚͞ ̫̣̠̖͡s̤̰͙͎͔̣̝̤h̸̤̪̼͚̖̕á̵̖̭̪l̴̢̠͚̻̤͍ͅl̷̢̳̠͍̹ͅ ̷͔̪̯̠͖̱̕͘ͅs̜̮̝͇̣̟i҉̫̠̬͉͓̱̮n̷̛͇̺͉̮̩ͅg̴͔͙͔ ̷̢̩̜͖̯̭̺t̕͏̠͕h̺̫̜͕̜͈͈e̥̗͈͓̦̦̗̗̳ ̪̦̤̮̝̯s̨̜̖̦̤̰̰̜̭o̷̪̙͉̝̤͓ń̶̡̼͉̺̞̺g̘̰̠ ͘͏͏̯̯̣̰̜̯̖o͖f̵̯͙͕̦̲̜ ͖̝͡͠͠c҉̧͍͚̺͠h̸͚̰̱͚̥a̷͈̲̤͚̖o̰̻s͙̭̥ ̠̮͚́͠à̖n̡̼̬̪͞d̸̹̹̠̱ ̶͔̯̗̹̥̼̱͞͡d̡͇̞̮̝e̵̸̹̟̺̤̬̤̦s̶̩̘̳̞͓̥̠ͅt̖̤̼̣̪̮͘͡r̥͟͞u͏͞҉͙͎̦̫͖c̠̜̣̪͇̪̳̰̀͘͝t̥̳̭̞͉i̹͔̹͙̻̣̺̝͟͠͞o̵̞̗͙̫̕n̠͙̥̯̬̼̬ͅ ̩̞̞̳̺̯ͅa̷̛̰̱̹̱͉̲̰͝n̡̧̢̩̫͕͉̲̭͈̱d̨̢҉̺̝̻̯ ͙̠̟̟͕̭̦͇͝h̵͔͍ḙ̟͖̖̲̥̘ ̛̞͓s̘̱͎͎̥͓͞h͏̡̞̪͇̣̬͓̰͠a̵͇͙͈̺̜͡l̨̻̱̭̯l͘҉̘̺̫̘ ̪̞̜̭̮̳̹͘e̶̮͢ņ̥̯̖̤̻̫͇͝ͅͅd̸̦͍͞ͅ ͓̟̪̲͖͈͓͈͡t̷̥͖͘͝h̡̥̫͘͟e͔̲̲͝ ̸̷̱̲̺̺w̕҉̨̗̖̪̹̤̫ͅơ̘͉̘r̴̨͔̼͝l̞̤͕̪͇ͅd̢͏̵̬̲͇͈͔̥.̶͉͕͉̝̜͖͈̯̜͞
̨͎̺͉̦̮̬̳͈̀͠I̵̠̹͓͉͈͉̱̯̕ţ̡͉̲͈̻̲͝ ̵̣̖͇̗̱̞͍̀s̡̭̻̕h̸͍a̬̙͟͟l̙̬̥̫ḷ͍͇̠͈̺̯͟͡ͅ ̨̳̬̖̫͓͖͇b̵̡̺̗̰͖é̷̡͓͎̪̳̣̳̘ ̱̗̥̗̟̱̀t̩̘̦͢h̷̬͇̥̣e͏̮̫͍̬̳̩̹ ͎͇̖̣̘̞̜̕͠A̬̼̘̰͈̙̲̲͞p͈̙̹̟̜͕̠o͇̜͖͢c̴̷̻̺͍͙͔͚a͕̦͇̩͔̤̺͇ḽ̶̮͖̼̫̺̣ͅy̸͔͈̲͚̠̺̪͜͝p͕̻̠̺͢ş̷̵̲̪͍͓̣̩͍e͓̱̼̗̠̠̲ ̡͔̺̮͟͟d͏͏̥͔͚̫e̴̶͖͇̝̳̲v̰̠͇͔̗̖͎͘o̷̦̺͙͍̹̤̭͙͘͠í̸͙d̶̢̦͞ ̧̪̖o̴̭͉̲͉f̹͓̬̥̺͘͢ͅ ̪̜̜̘͝ͅr̬͟e̘̱̝̖̙͈̮̼͓d̢̺͙̖̥̟̺̖͜͜ͅe̷͡҉̝̱̠̘̠̮̤m̶̜͈̳͍̲͕p̬̦̖t̶͓̩͎͜ì̼̩̬͍͙͢o̴̟̳̻̝͞n͏̙͔͚̙̝ͅ.̪̦̥̱̹
2010-01-28 [Ninja Smurf]: Why would he sing a song? Nuclear weapons make it faster, and less strain on the vocal chords.
2010-01-28 [Devil in Me]: *Beats misty with Tire Iron*
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Zalgo's mom is a whore. *spits on Zalgo's shoes*... wait... Zalgo wears shoes‽ *looks closer*... whoa... he wears Nikes!
2010-01-28 [Devil in Me]: he has a fashion sense! OMG!!!! wait who is Zalgo?
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: H̛͙ȩ͙̝̕͜ ̵̫̩̤̫c͚͇̲̪̝̯͢͡o͎̥͖͎͈̖̖̯m̼̰͎͡e͎̜̞̦̹͘s͚̙̞̭̟͜ͅ.
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Other than that though, he doesn't really do anything else. Sometimes he goes... occasionally he stays. But that's about it... *eats ramen*...
2010-01-28 [Devil in Me]: huh?
2010-01-28 [Nekko fox]: You heard the Penguin.
2010-01-28 [Devil in Me]: sure sure!
2010-01-28 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you interrobang me!
2010-01-28 [Pillowthief]: Sorry- is that's Misty1's job  
2010-01-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty's job is to clean out the rat traps... but she keeps trying to eat the cheese on them, which often leads to hilarity.
2010-01-28 [nokaredes]: My clever interrobang virus is spreading quickly... *ignores the nok's mom joke*
2010-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, your mom is the one spreading the virus! ...*scratches*...
2010-01-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey don't you hit me with a tire iron, I'll fuck yo ass up! *grabs my beating stick*
2010-01-29 [Pillowthief]: *weighs hands theatrically*


Hmmmmmmmmmmm.... Mort with a tire iron.......or Misty with a 'beating stick'....




Sorry girl. I think you'll lose.
2010-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *tire iron suddenly breaks in half*... oh ****.
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: HAHAHAHAH! you guys are Hilairous, better then the Real World DC
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: or any reality show really.
2010-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: But... this is a reality show! ...*hands Nokaredes a rose*... *looks at Misty and Devil in Me*... I know I still have one rose left, but do I really HAVE to give it to someone?
2010-01-29 [Chimes]: Heh. Heh. XD
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: ha ha ha very funny. if i was on a reality show that involved winning anyhting i'd lose in an instant. if it weren't for bad luck i'd have no luck at all.
2010-01-29 [Ninja Smurf]: I'd vote for you. It's more fun to watch the unlucky people try to play those games.
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: thanks...i think.
2010-01-29 [Ninja Smurf]: lol I am all for using you to entertain me :)
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: LOL i guess people need entertainment, which is why there are show like Jersy Shore.
2010-01-29 [Nekko fox]: FACILITY ARCHIVE RECORDS SEARCH - SEARCHING…
SEARCHING…
SEARCHING…
COMPLETE - FOUND 19 RESULTS FOR SEARCH TERMS “Patient #0017983”
CHRONOLOGICAL LISTINGS FOLLOW:


1.)ADMISSION FORM, PATIENT #0017983 - 11/18/05 15:12
Involuntary admittance requested by patient’s relatives in response to apparent self-destructive behavior cycle. Self-harm evident in physical exam: signs of past abrasions on head and neck, apparently due to self-inflicted scratching, and both fresh and partially-closed surface lacerations on arms and legs. Signs of extreme fatigue also evident - in examination patient admitted insomnia for, as quoted, “longer than you’d believe.” Patient unable to give exact time for length of insomnia, likely due to extended period of insomnia itself. Confusion and moderate delerium evident. PRELIMINARY MEDICATION ISSUED: Triazolam 0.25mg for insomnia, topical Bacitracin for wound care.


2.)ADMISSION EVALUATION, PATIENT #0017983 - 11/18/05 16:56
PERFORMED BY: Dr. Emil Lafayette. Self-harm confirmed. Patient removed dressings from arm lacerations, reopened wound while waiting for interviewer. Definite evidence of somniphobia in patient justifications for harm; patient refers to sleep with anxiety, and consistently acts against self to cause pain in response to lengthy periods of silence or other lack of stimuli. Issue of insomnia needs immediate attention, given evidence of exceedingly prolonged duration. Likewise possible agoraphobia. Patient requests an isolated bed, becomes withdrawn/agitated when request is denied, refuses to cooperate further with interview. Offers vague suggestion of hostile “other” in justification, but will not elaborate, as quoted, “because you’re not going to believe she exists until she hurts someone anyway.” Evidence for likely paranoid schizophrenia. Recommend further interview with full psychological spectrum testing for exact diagnosis. FINAL RECOMMENDATION: ADMIT PATIENT. PRELIMINARY MEDICATION ISSUED: Cancel Triazolam, instead 5mg Diazepam twice daily for insomnia, anxiety, and probable sleep disorders.


3.)FINAL ADMITTANCE REPORT, PATIENT #0017983 - 11/18/05 17:13
Patient issued bed in Room 409. Current occupant(s): Patient #0017802, Patient #0017983. Clothes from admission remanded to family of patient, three sets of common dress issued for immediate needs. Further psych eval scheduled for 10:00 11/19/05, determining future length of stay.


4.)WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/18/05 17:30
During routine new patient room check, Patient #0017802 places request with staff for transfer to, as quoted, “some other room.” Appears agitated, claims Patient #0017983 has been disturbing him. Patient #0017983 likewise requests transfer, to isolated bed. Both requests denied. ORDERLY NOTE: Followup room check suggested to avoid possible intrapatient conflict.


5.)WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/18/05 19:00
Followup room check. Patient #0017983 claims Dr. Lafayette has ordered him moved to Isolation. Patient #0017802 backs claim. Administration records demonstrate no such order. Upon informing room occupants, Patient #0017983 attempts to assault staff and Patient #0017802 becomes uncontrollably agitated. Additional personnel required to contain incident. Both patients restrained, sedated, forced into early lights out. ORDERLY NOTE: Exercise caution in all future room checks for 409.


6.) WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/18/05 23:57
Staff on Hall 1, Floor 4 report loud sounds from room 409 after facility lights out, disturbing other rooms and patients. Patient #0017983 found awake, extremely agitated and struggling against restraints. Demands lights be turned back on, as quoted, “before she comes.” Self-sustained injuries to wrists and ankles at points of restraint. Patient attempts to struggle against staff during trade to more comprehensive restraint, requiring additional personnel to contain incident. Additional sedation required for Patient #0017983. Patient #0017802 does not respond during course of event, likely due to sedation from earlier incident. ORDERLY NOTE: Maintain restraints on Patient #0017983 until further notice. Sedate patient before removing restraints for any reason. Recommend anti-psychotic be considered in future psych eval.


7.) WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/19/05 00:20
Staff on Hall 1, Floor 4 again report loud sounds from room 409. Patient #0017983 found catatonic on floor, with severe self-inflicted scratches on head and neck. Restraints are severed at connection points, with severe bruising on limbs possibly indicating more severe injury at restraint points with patient. Patient #0017802 is found deceased. Severe disfiguring wounds to face, complete with destruction (ORDERLY NOTE: Ingestion?) of patient’s eyes. Moved to room 101, locker 2, awaiting autopsy. Patient #0017983 transferred to Isolation, room 626, given injected dose of 100mg Zuclopenthixol on attending physician’s orders to control acute psychosis. ORDERLY NOTE: Recommend video observation to allow better control of future outbursts. Stay at least an arm’s length away from patient upper body restraints at all times. Just in case.


8.) AUTOPSY REPORT, PATIENT #0017802 - 11/19/05 09:44
PERFORMED BY: Dr. Julius Tweed. Ragged lacerations prominent around subject’s head and neck, increasing in severity and depth on the regions of the face itself - at several points, the flesh is cut to the bone. More disconcertingly, subject’s eyes appear to be violently removed from their sockets and are missing. CAUSE OF DEATH: Exsanguination from wounds. FINAL JUDGEMENT: Homicide. CORONER NOTE: Recommend consideration of Patient #0017983 as dangerous to staff and facility residents. Urge continued maintenance of restraints and isolation from contact with others in patient population. Also recommend digestive endoscopy to determine fate of missing tissues for staff cohesion purposes - orderlies from Floor 4 suspect cannibalism, promise to refuse Isolation shifts until such belief is disproven.


9.) MEDICAL REPORT, PATIENT #0017983 - 11/19/05 10:07
PERFORMED BY: Dr. Antoinus Cayle. Patient is cooperative, if withdrawn, during examination. No outbursts or threats. Current drug regimen appears effective. No unusual tissue or objects discovered in digestive endoscopy. Radiology tests discover hairline fractures in tibia, fibula of right leg. Severe abrasions evident on skin of restraint points, also head and neck, necessitating topical treatment. Troubling instability in vitals - BP is acutely elevated, pulse rapid and weak for patient’s size. Extended stress from anxiety, elevated mood, and insomnia likely cause. PHYSICIAN NOTE: Patient must sleep to begin recovery process. Recommend elevated dosage of Diazepam to encourage this result. Firm contact-point restraints not recommended for this patient due to risk of further injury. Full-body restraint must be considered as alternative.


10.) PSYCHIATRIC EVALUATION, PATIENT #0017983 - 11/19/05 10:39
PERFORMED BY: Dr. George Tulling. Definite evidence indicating disassociation of identity from actions. Patient expresses remorse for death of Patient #0017802, yet refuses to admit responsibility for actions in said event. Instead externalizes blame into antagonistic female “other.” Same figure, apparently referenced in prior evaluation, seems to be central actor in patient’s paranoid psychosis. Behavior and actions of said “other” justified through magical thinking, despite recognition of depicted individual’s illogically-defined capabilities to sustain reported antagonism. As quoted, “I don’t know, you don’t know, and she doesn’t care.” Patient requests observation of room be terminated, grows agitated when request is denied, makes threats, refuses to continue interview. DIAGNOSIS: Paranoid schizophrenia manifesting in somniphobia, violent psychosis, and disassociative episodes. MEDICATION ISSUED: Up dosage for Diazepam to 10mg twice daily, on 11/24/05 begin issuing 2.5mg doses of Haloperidol twice daily for psychosis. INTERVIEWER NOTE: Utilize patient observation protocols and ward rounds to check for possible drug interaction effects, followup immediately if found or on 11/30/05 otherwise.


11.) WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/19/05 14:32
During standard rounds Patient #0017983 requests that observation of room be terminated. Warns staff of perceived threat inherent in observation protocol. When request is denied, begins struggling against restraints and screaming warnings to staff, observation camera operator regarding disassociative, antagonistic “other.” ACTING PHYSICIAN NOTE: Reject recommendations from orderlies to sedate Patient #0017983 unless medically or procedurally sound. Sedatives are not a safety blanket. ORDERLY NOTE: They say this guy is at his sedative limit, and he was nearly pulling his bed off its bolts. Use double staff if at all possible when dealing with him. Whatever’s in his head… it’s strong.


12.)STAFF COMMUNICATIONS - 11/19/05 16:53
FROM: Charles McKinney - Head of Patient Care Division
TO: Patient Care Staff List
SUBJECT: RE:FWD:Patient #0017983


This has officially gone far enough. I did not intervene in this matter before, because I was under the impression that the men and women under my supervision were beyond such things as this, but circumstances have proven me to be mistaken and I will not allow these rumors to progress any further. The only thing “wrong” with Patient #0017983 is that he is seriously ill and dependent upon us for care and assistance in his recovery. He is not the first patient with explosive episodes we have treated, he is not even the only one currently in our facility, and he will not be the last. It thus pains me to discover that one singular breach of safety, which WAS properly addressed by facility protocol, has left my staff whispering superstitions to one another and accepting the delusions of our patient as truth. We are better than this. There are indeed risks inherent in this profession, risks we all knew about upon assuming it, but that is the burden we bear to render aid to those who find themselves in our beds.


Until otherwise noted I will not approve of any shift changes from scheduled Isolation hours. Our staff counselors are always available during standard hours for those who need to consult with someone in light of the recent event and associated workplace anxiety. It is a fringe benefit of working in mental health, and I suggest anyone having difficulties make use of it. This matter is closed, and I want to hear no further mention of it. As previously stated, I expected more from all of you.
- Charles


13.) WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/19/05 20:44
During standard rounds Patient #0017983 requests that lights be left on after scheduled lights out time. After consultation with attending physician and therapist, request granted. Room check proceeds uneventfully until staff move to depart, at which point request is made for observation to be terminated. Upon denial of request, patient instead requests for lights to be doused as usual. Request granted. Another request is made, now for red-bulb sleep lights to be doused during scheduled lights out time. Patient understands that low-level light is necessary for room observation - as quoted, “that’s why I want them off.” Warns observation camera operator against Her. Attending therapist denies request. Sorry Jacob…
14.) STAFF COMMUNICATIONS - 11/19/05 21:12
FROM: Dr. Emil Lafayette
TO: Patient Care Staff List
SUBJECT: Lights in 626


I happened to notice tonight while in final checks that the sleep lights in Isolation 626 were turned off after standard rounds - without my knowledge, or consent. As I am sure you are all aware, this is a SEVERE breach of facility protocol. When video observation of a patient is recommended and approved, there is a reason for such a decision to be made. Patient #0017983 has violent episodes and MUST be monitored to minimize the risk of him causing further harm to his already precarious physical state. You have ABSOLUTELY NO authority to override decisions made by the medical personnel of this, or any other, facility. NONE.


I have been hearing talk around the halls that some of you are AFRAID of this man. He is bound to a bed, under the highest sedation we can medically provide, and both physically and mentally suffering from acute fatigue. Do you also jump at shadows? Regardless of the reason, I will NOT permit untrained orderlies to begin interfering in the care provided to our patients. If such an event occurs again, I will inform Mr. McKinney and see the entire night’s orderly staff barred from the premises. Do I make myself clear?
- Dr. Emil Lafayette MD, FACEP, MHSC


15.)WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/19/05 23:27
[PATIENT #0017983, NAME REDACTED] won’t stop screaming. It just won’t stop. Hours of it. It echoes in my ears, in my skull. Whenever he’s coherent he begs us to turn the camera off, or the lights off, or just make everything go away. I’m sorely tempted, poor [SOFTWARE CENSORED], but Doc Lafayette pulled Jacob from observation and is watching everyone from the video room for the rest of his shift thanks to Michael’s business with the lights earlier. Last I saw of him, he was headed for the elevator with his jacket saying he “just can’t do this to my kids.” I don’t know why I’m here anymore. I just keep staring up at the cameras. Is that [SOFTWARE CENSORED] busier watching his patient, or us?


I’d only need one needle to stop the screaming…


16.)WARD EVENT REPORT - 11/20/05 00:01
It stopped. Just… stopped. No one’s willing to check why. I think [PATIENT #0017983, NAME REDACTED] is gone. I pray She is gone.


17.) STAFF COMMUNICATIONS - 11/20/05 00:04
FROM: Dr. Emil Lafayette
TO: All
SUBJECT: Patient #0017983 AGAIN


I SAID NO ONE IS TO ENTER ISOLATION 626 WITHOUT MY EXPRESS PERMISSION, GOD [SOFTWARE CENSORED] YOU ALL! I WILL HAVE ALL YOUR JOBS FORohgod


18.)ADMISSION EVALUATION, PATIENT #0017986 - 11/20/05 9:25
PERFORMED BY: Dr. George Tulling. Former staff. Patient discovered in locked observation room setting fire to equipment and recordings. Attempted suicide in flames before rescue by staff. Claims to be antagonized by same female “other” as former Patient #0017983. Possibly involved in death of said resident. If so, evidence obvious for disassociation of self from actions. Likely paranoid schizophrenia. Patient will not respond to further questions - as quoted, “Don’t go looking for her. She’ll find you.” FINAL RECOMMENDATION: ADMIT PATIENT. PRELIMINARY MEDICATION ISSUED: 2.5mg doses of Haloperidol twice daily for schizophrenic psychosis.


19.)STAFF COMMUNICATIONS - 11/20/05 9:36
FROM: Dr. George Tulling
TO: Charles McKinney - Head of Patient Care Division
SUBJECT: I’ve just heard.


Seal him in Isolation, wait Her out, cremate both bodies. As far as the relatives are concerned, Patient #0017983 died in the fire set by Lafayette in committing suicide. That’s all anyone needs to know.


Let’s just hope the rest of us don’t wind up needing time in these beds as well.
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: wtf?
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: A psychotic thinks that two and two are five.
A neurotic knows two and two are four -- but he hates it.
2010-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: tl;dr
2010-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, well five out of four children have trouble with fractions!
2010-01-29 [Devil in Me]: Welcome to the Psychiatric Hotline.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, please press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2.
If you have multiple personalities, please press 3, 4, 5, and 6.
If you are paranoid-delusional, we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice will tell you which number to press.
If you are depressed, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.
If you are delusional and occasionally hallucinate, please be aware that the thing you are holding on the side of your head is alive and about to bite off your ear.
2010-01-29 [Ninja Smurf]: hmm... to jumpon the Zalgo bandwagon http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4TFp71j7UjQ
2010-01-29 [Pillowthief]: Fucking ninja cults.
2010-01-30 [nokaredes]: I don't need your rose! I can make myself a rose! Out of... I dunno... duck tape!
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn it! My rose-bomb assassination attempt foiled again! ...*dives out the window into oncoming traffic*...
2010-01-30 [Pillowthief]: *[Hedda] smiles and drives on, finally avenged*
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you, Wally! *dies in the streets*... *cars continue to casually drive over my corpse*...
2010-01-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pokes Mortified Penguin's corpse with a pointy stick and laughs*
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from behind the cash register*... what corpse? ...*eats an apple*... *goes back to reading the newspaper*... Holy crap! Old lady with 12 cats needs someone to spend quality time with! ...*circles the ad*...
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I'm tired of being located in Pakistan! ...*Bob's Diner suddenly and inexplicably relocates to a rock in the middle of the Atlantic Ocean*... *waves crash against the windows*... ah... much better... *a gang of sharks burst in and order a round of salt water shots*... *they eye Misty hungrily*...
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*an Orca Whale ambles in*... *he approaches Misty*... "You know... you look a lot like my ex-wife..."... *he orders a tall glass of lemon salt water*...
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *the Orca Whale goes on to say, "...but she didn't have quite as big a mustache as you, sir."*... *he slowly drinks his lemon salt water*... *he chuckles with a thick Norwhalegian accent*...
2010-01-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a mustache, and I'm not a whale, you my dear sir need glasses. *mops the floor with cherry jell-o*
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: "Are you questioning me?!"... *he quick draws a pistol and shoots Misty right in her flipper*...
2010-01-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey! I'm mopping here!
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: "I apologize, sir. I will wait until you finish mopping before I violently gun you down."... *the whale returns to his seat and sips on his lemon salt water*...
2010-01-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: *finishes mopping and goes to take a squid's order*
2010-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: That squid has been waiting there since we were back in Pakistan! ...for taking so long to take his order, I'm docking your pay and taking one of your toes. *chops off Misty's big toe*
2010-01-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh well.
2010-01-30 [Pillowthief]: No one's going to eat that, even here, and you know that.
2010-02-01 [Pillowthief]: *after several days, the zombie-house-band wakes up and does a Drum-Tom-Snare to signify that that last comment was a joke*
2010-02-01 [Nekko fox]: Even the zombies would reject that meat.
2010-02-01 [nokaredes]:   
2010-02-01 [Pillowthief]: He even looks like a zombie-drummer. Amazing.
2010-02-01 [nokaredes]: I figure I'm generally slow to make comments here, so I should at least provide imagemacros...
2010-02-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh huh.
2010-02-01 [Nekko fox]: And then God created hamsters.
2010-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Hamsters make great hors d'oeuvres. You can usually get them three to a skewer too... *eats ramen with hamster in it*...
2010-02-01 [Nekko fox]: *The Hamster Of Might Is Not Pleased and Shoves [~Crimson Angel~] in the Oven and cooks her*
2010-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNOOOOOO!!! ...*quickly grabs [~Crimson Angel~] out of the oven*... How dare you?!! ......I just bought this freakin' oven! You're getting Misty stains all in it! ...just burn her in the dumpster... *tosses Misty away*... *meticulously cleans the oven*... shh... it's gonna be okay... *pets the oven*...
2010-02-01 [Nekko fox]: *The hamster is quietly taking a leaking on the electrical outlet in the back. Sparks shoot. Death occurs. Their is a memorial for the newly scorched-to-cinders over. No one remembers the hamster*
2010-02-01 [Pillowthief]: Yeah. That poor Over. That (whatever it was) totally took a leaking all over it.
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: As long as nothing happened to my precious ov- *glances at the oven*... *it's on fire for some reason*... -en, I'll be alright. *pets the flaming oven*... *is badly burned*... *oven suddenly explodes*...
2010-02-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the nice old Maytag repairman shows up*


  



"Damn. I've been fixing ovens for sixty years, an' I ain't never seen shit like that happen." *he spits tobacco on the floor*
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: While you're here, would you mind taking a look at my washing machine? It hasn't worked right since that big rat died in it while I was washing the forks. *points over at the fork pile*... *a dead skewered rat can be seen on the end of one of the forks*...
2010-02-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: "Bitch, what do I look like? A repairman or somethin'?!" *he orders some tequila*
2010-02-02 [Ninja Smurf]: I swear everytime I come here my IQ drops 5 points. Not much longer before people confuse me with Mort.
2010-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Yeah, right.
2010-02-02 [nokaredes]: What Misty said!
2010-02-02 @Not logged in user@: Ninja Smurf, you seem to have misspelled 'raises'... I don't know why you would even put a 'd' or an 'o' in there... *eats ramen*...
2010-02-02 Mortifried Ponguin: What?! ...why am I suddenly logged out?! ...stupid cheap school computers!!
2010-02-02 [Devil in Me]: technology is not stupid only the people who don't know how to use it think it is stupid. *hit monitor a few times* Stupid computer!
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: You don't understand though... these computers had buck teeth and constantly made a loud 'DEEEERRRRRRR' noise... they also drank heavily and I think I saw one of them inject heroine into its USB port...
2010-02-02 [Nekko fox]: That helps them procreate, you see.
2010-02-02 [Devil in Me]: you guys are funny.
2010-02-02 [Ninja Smurf]: Who the hell is [Mortifried Ponguin]? Is that the new side dish here?
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope. It's the main course! *rips off pants*
2010-02-02 [Ninja Smurf]: Mort, take your inflatable date to the other room.
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, buddy... that there's my wife you're talkin' about! *breaks a beer bottle*
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*shards from the bottle pop my wife*... SHERONDA!!! NNNNOOOOOOOOO!!!!
2010-02-02 [Ninja Smurf]: hope you kept your reciept.... (stupid connection. lol)
2010-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the autopsy reveals that she was pregnant with a tiny, inflatable baby*... hmm... I'm not sure how that's even possible! ...I mean... we always used protection! ...*eats ramen*...
2010-02-02 [Devil in Me]: but isn't she made of rubber?
2010-02-02 [Pillowthief]: I believe that's how they procreate.
2010-02-03 [Nekko fox]: You see, you should have had her on the pill instead.
2010-02-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: You can always remarry.
2010-02-03 [Paul Doyle]: Perhaps you might analyze your Mating Rating first. :P


________________
Be My Girl, Sally


Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, be my girl


Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, be my girl


Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, be my girl


Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, Be my girl


I was blue and lonely,
I couldn't sleep a wink
And I could only get unconscious
If I'd had to much to drink
There was somehow
Something wrong somewhere
And each day
Seemed grey and dead
The seeds of desperation
Were growing in my head
I needed inspiration
A brand new start in life
Somewhere to place affection
But I didn't want a wife


And then by lucky chance
I saw in a special magazine
An ad that was unusual
The like I'd never seen
"Experience something different
With our new imported toy
She's loving, warm, inflatible
And a guarantee of joy."


She came all wrapped in cardboard
All pink and shrivelled down
A breath of air was all she needed
To make her lose that frown
I took her to the bedroom
And pumped her with some life
And later in a moment
That girl became my wife


And so I sit her in the corner
And sometimes stroke her hair
And when I'm feeling naughty
I blow her up with air
She's cuddly and she's bouncy
She's like a rubber ball
I bounce her in the kitchen
And I bounce her in the hall


And now my life is different
Since Sally came my way
I wake up in the morning
And have her on a tray
She's everything they say she was
And I wear a permanent grin
And I only have to worry
In case my girl wears thin


Won't you be my girl, won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, be my girl
Won't you be my girl, won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, be my girl
Won't you be my girl, won't you be my girl
Won't you be my, be my, be my girl
2010-02-03 [Pillowthief]: You don't marry concubines, even if their name is Sally!
2010-02-03 [Devil in Me]: LOL
2010-02-03 [Nekko fox]: I rofled my copter over that.
2010-02-03 [Devil in Me]: what is a copter and what does rofled mean?
2010-02-03 [twitchboy]: damn bitch been cheating on me again!!!! where is she? ill prick her with a pencil i swear i will!
2010-02-03 [Devil in Me]: who's been cheating?
2010-02-04 [Nekko fox]: Your dog.
2010-02-04 [Ninja Smurf]: With Nekko...
2010-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...we need a higher class of conversation here. So what do you guys think of the economy? ...*eloquently sips wine*... *articulately snorts a line of coke*...
2010-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Bitch dealer! ...this coke's like 30% baking powder! ...*grabs his MAC-10 off the rack*... *kicks down the back door and dashes out*...
2010-02-04 [zankou]: um stick to pot. you can grow it yourself and its almost always pure...almost....*hides meth-laced weed in pants*
2010-02-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs* The economy sucks.
2010-02-04 [Paul Doyle]: The economy sucks donkey.
2010-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...the economy? ...who cares about that crap! ...so [Devil in Me]'s dog is cheating on [twitchboy] with [Nekko fox], huh? ...interesting... *eats ramen*...
2010-02-04 [Ninja Smurf]: I've got the pictures to prove it somewhere.
2010-02-04 [Devil in Me]: Sadie is cheating? How dare she. I'll have a talk with her. Sorry twitchboy, i know she'll come back to you i just know it. SHe has to. otherwise you'll never get a girlfriend.
2010-02-04 [Devil in Me]: lol jk
2010-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You weirdos... whatever happened to our discussion about the economy? I think it's an alright economy, but it could be better. I think if we gave it a bath and put a nice suit on it, it'd look a whole lot better than it does now... *eats ramen*...
2010-02-04 [Devil in Me]: a dog in a suit? hmm sound alright to me, but since she's a girl, why not a dress? Twitchboy might think she's more attractive then. LOL JK.
2010-02-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort, you're the reason I have to go to therapy.
2010-02-05 [Pillowthief]: Sadie? What hapened to Sally?!
2010-02-05 [Paul Doyle]: I think Sting got lonely and desperate again, and made Sally blow up as she was being blow up.
2010-02-05 [Devil in Me]: saide is my dog, she's a chow and beautiful, just check my page if you don't believe me.
2010-02-05 [TrenchDevil]: the obamas have everything under controll trust me :)
2010-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps they have too much under control!
2010-02-05 [TrenchDevil]: <.<  >.>  **speaks into her black jaket collar**
2010-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *a bunch of soldiers burst in through the roof and start shooting*... *uses Misty as a shield*...
2010-02-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY MAN! *slaps Mort* I was taking a bath!
2010-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ...in the kitchen?!
2010-02-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, I have my own personal bathtub in there.
2010-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: That's the soup pot, dang it!
2010-02-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why do you think the soup tastes funny?
2010-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Because I spit in it and stir it with a plunger? And furthermo- *the soldiers from the ceiling kill me*
2010-02-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oops!
2010-02-06 [Pillowthief]: And.....


That's why I dont eat the soup.
2010-02-06 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, now Mort's covered in the soup and dead soldiers, it's SURE to be ruined!
2010-02-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol yep.
2010-02-08 [Nekko fox]: Please Note: No amount of loyalty, determination, self-sacrifice, or heroism will deflect an incoming intercontinental ballistic missile.
2010-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Unless you truly BELIEVE.
2010-02-08 [Ninja Smurf]: well then Mort.. Try it sometime.
2010-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *launches a missile at [Ninja Smurf]*... come on... BELIEVE, Mort! You have to want this! ......*the missile impacts, causing death and much devastation*... huh... I guess he was right! It takes more than sheer belief... now we know.
2010-02-08 [Ninja Smurf]: *pulls self back together* ouchies... *fires nuclear powered squirt gun filled with urine into Morts eyes*
2010-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Sucker! ...I don't even have eyes! ...*stumbles around*... *trips and lands in the rusty fork pile*...
2010-02-08 [Nekko fox]: Dammit! Quit ruining the soup!
2010-02-09 [Pillowthief]: And dirty-ing my dishes!
2010-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: It's... it's just a little blood. No need to rewash them... *duct tapes some napkins over the bleeding fork holes*...
2010-02-09 [Nekko fox]: AND THEN MORT IS MISTAKEN FOR A PONY!


  

2010-02-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh poor ponies.
2010-02-10 [Ninja Smurf]: Hey... save tat blood! It will work in the broth!
2010-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*sigh*... I wish I was a unicorn... *depressingly draws unicorns on the walls*...
2010-02-10 [Ninja Smurf]: Wow... Mort lost it again, he's doing the cave drawing thing in the oven again...oh well. *turns oven on*
2010-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha! I haven't paid the gas bill in years! ...*eats ramen in the dark oven*... *a pair of yellow eyes appears next to me*... *screeching can be heard from inside the oven*...
2010-02-10 [Ninja Smurf]: We've been running the oven off of the septic system, clean natural fuel that adds a quality flavor to the food.
2010-02-10 [Pillowthief]: Eww.


I kinda threw up a little, right in my mouth.
2010-02-10 [Ninja Smurf]: Haha! Thats the appetizer!
2010-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *strums a ukulele in the corner, while making up a happy song*


Pillowthief came in and he threw up a little,
But don't worry, guys. It's just a little spittle.
Then Mort got up from his chair, ukulele in hand
He said, "Come on, guys! Let's start a band!"
No one complied and Mort started getting mad,
Tiny Tim showed up. "Calm down!" said the lad.
Mort began to beat him violently with his ukulele,
Mort's muscles were huge, since he worked out daily.
Tiny Tim suddenly screamed and immediately died,
At his funeral, nobody wept... nobody cried.
The blood stains on the wall remain to this day,
and Misty's in her cage, eating some hay.


SOLO!!


*plays a mad ukulele solo*... *smashes the ukulele over [Ninja Smurf]'s head*...
2010-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a cage, I sold it on eBay.
2010-02-10 [Sunrose]: :O
2010-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: What?
2010-02-10 [Sunrose]: Absurd behaviour!
2010-02-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: What is?
2010-02-10 [timmyT]: boing zoom dikoda
2010-02-10 [twitchboy]: i sold my soul on ebay, then my heart, then my kidneys, lungs, and lastly my virginity...she returned it shortly after claiming it was a defective product
2010-02-10 [Nekko fox]:   




I found something for the soup.
2010-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: That poor hooker... I guess he really did explode all over her face.
2010-02-10 [Nekko fox]: Didn't you know? That was Superman's money shot.
2010-02-10 [the wonderfall-man]: I think thats part of the striper who blew up last night out side by the dumpster.
2010-02-11 [Nekko fox]: Superman's doing. It's his trademark.
2010-02-11 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's why I use duct tape to hold my license plate on instead of screws...
2010-02-11 [Nekko fox]: CSI: Pallet Town


  



It seems that bullets...


*Puts on Shades*


...are super effective.






YEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!
2010-02-11 [twitchboy]: where in the hell did that come from?
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Aww... that poor, cute pikachu!
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    Come on, Pikachu! Let's g-
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    ......
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    What the hell?!!
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    What? What happened? I can't see anything!
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    Brock, you dumb bastard... open your eyes!
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    HOLY SH*T!! WHERE AM I?!! WHAT ARE THESE STRANGE CREATURES?!
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    Well... there's no need to let the rest of this thing go to waste. You can cook, right Brock?
2010-02-11 [Goma]: ;0
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    Of course I can cook! ...I just need a few extra ingredients...
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    Oh, hey! Look, Ash! Some tasty spices!
2010-02-11 [Paul Doyle]:
o__0
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    I believe that is a pile of goat shit, Brock.
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    Don't make fun of my spices, jerk!
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    It smells delish!
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    It is finished. You must try it.
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    om nom nom nom
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    ......
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]:    Wh- What's wrong? Don't you like it?
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]:    I told you that was goat shit, you douchebag!
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Riiiiiiight... well, this is getting tedious and annoying... I'm just going to go eat some ramen in the corner now... *eats ramen*...
2010-02-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Get back here, darn you! *pulls out a gun*... *somehow manages to shoot Misty in the face*...
2010-02-11 [Nekko fox]: That was fucking hilarious.
2010-02-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: You guys are stupid.
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Your FACE is stupid! *high fives himself*
2010-02-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort, you just proved my point.
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Your FACE just proved my point! *high fives a cactus*
2010-02-11 [Pillowthief]: Ouch.


Everyone knows not to high-five a cactuar. Even when they try for it, over and over again.



2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid running pickle!
2010-02-11 [Nekko fox]: Don't worry, I stabbed him when he went out the back door. Stupid running pickle...
2010-02-11 [Ninja Smurf]: Quit playing with your pickle in public Mort!
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That'll teach him to be a ninja pickle.
2010-02-11 [Devil in Me]: =D LOL
2010-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: You didn't say the word 'pickle'. >:(
2010-02-12 [Pillowthief]: You could always high-five a pickle instead of a cactus. I do it at least once, everyday.
2010-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, yes... we all like high-fiving our pickles...
2010-02-12 [Pillowthief]: Not too hard though. That stings.
2010-02-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a pickle.
2010-02-12 [Pillowthief]: Surprisingly.


Everyone should have a pickle.
2010-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: That's right. Why, I even have two pickles!
2010-02-12 [Pillowthief]: You should probably give that extra one back to Turkey...
2010-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Never! *breaks pickle in half*
2010-02-13 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-02-13 [Nekko fox]: I think my friend Jeff here ate your pickle....




  



*Jeff devours quite a few things with it's slavering jaws*
2010-02-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: Jeff's ugly.
2010-02-13 [Nekko fox]: *Jeff eats [~Crimson Angel~]'s face and gets horribly sick. Everyone takes care of Jeff because you hurt his feelings and he's not such a bad guy/mutant-insectoid alien once you get to know him. He also makes an apple cobbler you'd stab your dead grandmother's corpse for*
2010-02-14 [Pillowthief]: True dat.
2010-02-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Both of my grandmothers and all three of my grandfathers are still alive.
2010-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *sigh*... fine then! ...*stabs your grandmother*... are you happy now?!
2010-02-15 [Nekko fox]:   


'Nuff said.
2010-02-15 [Pillowthief]: Im blind!
2010-02-15 [Nekko fox]: You loved it.,
2010-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Interesting... *takes notes*...
2010-02-15 [Pillowthief]: Can 2as t a ty pw e,. bli nd asfv.
2010-02-15 [CrystalBlaze]: What pickle gimmie gimmie
2010-02-15 [Goma]:   
Beware of Fo-Zone!!! BEWARE!
2010-02-16 [Nekko fox]:
NO!




  



  



I'll Beat it with my FISTS until it stops deserving it!
2010-02-16 [Pillowthief]: Oh wow.
That's all I can come up with to say on that one. I think it might be unanimous that [Goma] and [Nekko fox] should be stripped of their pickle commenting abilities.
2010-02-16 [Nekko fox]: You can't find me, I'm hiding.




  

2010-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: He's behind that tree! Get him!
2010-02-16 [Nekko fox]: Bahaha....now I shall feast on these babies while they go on their wild goose chase!
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a deer, not a goose... gosh... *eats ramen*... *a big wave crashes against the windows, since we're apparently still located in the ocean*... *a single Pakistani remains on the roof, scared and confused about his new surroundings*... *he gets into a fight with a swordfish*...
2010-02-17 [Nekko fox]: YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!




  

2010-02-17 [Nekko fox]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vdAFL9mKYB8






^----watch this. /b/ found it's new king.


  

2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Rules 1 & 2! ...and sometimes 34... *eats ramen*... *shines his new glock*... *glares at Nokaredes*...
2010-02-17 [Paul Doyle]: Wow, Chimera Synx stuff on Elftown . . . that's sumfin'
2010-02-17 [Pillowthief]: Hey I know that guy.


Name's Jim, or something or other. Kinda a douche.
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, most people named Jim usually are.
2010-02-17 [Nekko fox]: He also beats black people for fucking with him.
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe next time he'll do what he's told and shine some shoes.
2010-02-17 [Nekko fox]: Never smarm a southern gentleman.
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*drinks hot sauce*...
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm a Southern gentleman... well... I'm Southern... *eats ramen in a biscuit*... hmm... needs more gravy...
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: So far, this year's comment average is 8.7894736842105263157894736842105 comments a day!! As you should know, that means this is pretty much the worst friscal (that's right! friscal!) year ever. Get it together, you jerks! Don't make me start taking hostages again!
2010-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: There's 23 more days until this friscal year is halfway over and we only have 1504 comments. I personally blame Misty.
2010-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   



I move that we feed misty to this thing ---^


All in favor say Dagurashibanipal!
2010-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: As if! ...she'll eat it first.
2010-02-18 [Nekko fox]: I think those claws would make for some very scratchy eatin's.
2010-02-18 [Nekko fox]: I also think that we should nominate her to the position of 'Saloon Monkey'. She can dance for change, thus bringing in further income.
2010-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... that name's too similar to "Sailor Moon". People might get confused and that can only lead to sadness... and hilarity... but mostly sadness...
2010-02-18 [the wonderfall-man]: Thats alot of dead ants. THats a sicotic ant eater.
2010-02-18 [Paul Doyle]: *points to above pic* Sergal (not General Rain) . . . created by TrancyMick, adopted by hundreds in the furry fandom.
2010-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nekko dear, DON'T FUCK WITH ME BITCH! *pimp slaps Nekko but misses and slaps a Hippo* Oops, sorry Jake.
2010-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty, you idiot. That is clearly a rhino named Steve. *points at a giraffe whose nametag says "Larry"*
2010-02-18 [the wonderfall-man]: Your all wrong. Its Bob the Builder.
2010-02-18 [Nekko fox]:   



Sergal trying to eat a Synx and vice versa.


  



Sergal enjoying a meal.


They make me smiiiiiiiiile.








  

2010-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, well... these are Doritos.


  



They are crunchy and delicious.
2010-02-18 [Nekko fox]: You better not be talking smack boy....ARE they crunchy and delicious? Cuz if you's lyin' to me, Imma gon' have to lay yo ass down!


Fer a nap!
2010-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... sometimes they're soggy and disgusting... but that's only if you mistake them for cereal and pour milk in the bag (I won't make that mistake twice!)... *eats ramen*... but I could use a nap... *lies on the large, conspicuous sofa in in the middle of the diner*... *the sofa rumbles and stands up*... oops! Sorry, Misty... I though you were furniture again... I won't make that mistake twice! ...*lies on the big, conspicuous bed in the middle of the diner*... *it rumbles*.........
2010-02-19 [Rising Death Dragon]: wierd forgot this place
2010-02-19 [Devil in Me]: how could you forget?
2010-02-19 [Devil in Me]: this place is hell on earth
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]: No, Hell is up in Michigan. Want me to google that for you?
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]: http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Hell%2C+Michigan
2010-02-19 [Ninja Smurf]: I thought Hell waswhere my ex wife lives... hmmm
2010-02-19 [Devil in Me]: Good one both of you
2010-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: It seems that Hell has frozen over... excellent. There's a lot of women that now owe me a date.
2010-02-19 [Ninja Smurf]: Do the rest of us a favor and stick to your inflatable girlfriend Mort... please.. The idea of you actually procreating is one that I would rather not contemplate... ever...
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]: Damned right they do (/pun).


HEY! HEY MISTY! HEY! Mort says you owe him a date!
2010-02-19 [the wonderfall-man]: I wonder if its any good.
2010-02-19 [Devil in Me]: Mort?? No he's cheap
2010-02-19 [the wonderfall-man]: *starts laughing his head of, rolling on the ground* MY HEAD!!!CRAP!!!GET IT BEFORE IT ROLLS OUT THE DOOR!!!
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]: *Actually gives it a kick*


BE FREE LITTLE HEAD! BE FREE! MAKE FOR THE BORDER AND NO ONE CAN FOLLOW YOU!


2010-02-19 [Devil in Me]: LOL
2010-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *the head rolls into the water, since we're still apparently located in the middle of the ocean*


And the only Misty I'll date is this one!


  



Wait... hold on... that's Doritos again...


  



This is the one.
2010-02-19 [the wonderfall-man]: *head comes back and shakes some* Thats one ugly picture. Have fun with your ugle pokemon training Misty.
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]: http://www.bash.org/?900148
2010-02-19 [the wonderfall-man]: I loved that movie. And thats true, I'm still trying to hide from Waldo. Oh crap, he found me. RUN!!!!!
2010-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: It seems as though he has lost his cane, hat, shoe, backpack, and 9mm! Now we must search all of Russia to find them. *starts looking in the streets of Moscow*
2010-02-19 [the wonderfall-man]: I'll start in Amsterdam
http://englishrussia.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/05/live_in_russia.jpg
2010-02-19 [Paul Doyle]: Snooge!
  

http://www.furaffinity.net/view/1012441/
2010-02-19 [Devil in Me]: Okay You guy are offically freaking me out! can Waldo travel?
2010-02-19 [Nekko fox]:   



Snooge porn?
2010-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of snooges, I was looking over some of my old school crap... apparently my IQ in first grade was only 150... I had always just assumed it was so much more... now I'm depressed... *eats a tub of ramen ice cream*...
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: If I ever get around to copying the rest of Bob's Diner's 28,214 comments to a Word document (I got all the way to the 2009's), I'm going to be very annoyed... because in the last few months, there's been hundreds of images (mostly from you, Nekkro!) which don't copy over when I paste them to Word. So I have to copy them all individually, paste them over the image's html that actually did copy, and then re-size the image, so the document isn't too incredibly large...
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]:   



HAR
2010-02-20 [Duke Devlin]: I literally just died of laughter.
2010-02-20 [Duke Devlin]: That sounded sarcastic. It wasn't.
2010-02-20 [Duke Devlin]: Neither was that. XD
2010-02-20 [Duke Devlin]: :D
2010-02-20 [Duke Devlin]: >:D
2010-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: .... You guys are nuts!
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Roflcopter
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Lmaonade
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Lollerskates.
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]:


  



  



  



  



  

2010-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: uh....
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: You heard you Gaston.
2010-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nekko, you need help.
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Lisa needs braces.
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: DENTAL PLAN!
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: LISA NEEDS BRACES!!
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks a bottle over Lenny's head*... Lisa. Needs. Braces.
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: 




*Mort's first 'experience' with women*
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I wish!
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, we know Mort. You ended up killing them both and eating their livers with some fava beans and a nice Chianti....
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: 


*Nekko's first experience with 'women'*
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...you're lucky I went with that gif... the other one was an x-rated tranny orgy...
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Hey, how did you get my camp video?
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I... was your counselor.
2010-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Oh, so you were the one they were dragging away when I screamed "bad touch". hell, I didn't even know what it meant back then...Johnny from Arts and Crafts just said to yell it when I was talking with you then start crying. It was like magic!
2010-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_O Wow.
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I would have gotten away with it too, if it weren't for you meddling campers! *shakes fist from behind bars*
2010-02-20 [Nekko fox]:
THE GAME FOR AWESOME PEOPLE!




You see, the trick to leading an entertaining life is pretty basic. It's based on what games you can devise! You detour a car off the main road, preferably filled with a person or people that you despise. Once they are a goodly distance from the main thoroughfare and ditzing along through a stretch of road in the woods, you lay metal spike traps in the road. Jagged scrap metal will do, but ninja caltrops are better. Once the cars tires are blown out and beyond repair, take your time shooting out the windows! Be careful you don't shoot the people now, you're interesting, not a sociopath! Next, when the person, or persons, panic and scramble from their car like terrified mice, blow your Viking War Horn, thus sounding the alert to all the players of the game. You should have about five to ten people along with you, stalwart and courageous fellows who are dressed out in the armor commonly seen on Viking Gods, placed around the area the car has been disabled. At the sound of horn, you and your comrades-in-arms charge towards the car, hunting down the occupants in the car on horseback, like men once did! Now, depending on the number of people in the car should affect the number of participants in the hunt, and each hunter shall be using only rope and their horns to capture their prey! Points are given to the prey depending on how long they can last in the woods without being captured, whereas points are deducted if caught. Vice versa, the person (or persons, if you wish to make this a team-building exercise) who catch the prey win the that round of the game and earn extra points based on how quickly they achieved their goal as well as their ingenuity in means of capture. Did they use their ropes like lassos? 5 points. Did they create a snare trap? 10 points. If they use their ropes to devise a clear pit trap which was dug with their Viking War Horns, covered with leaves and debris, and thus net their prey after startling them into said pit-trap using only their horses to badger their prey into position? 50 points. As well, immobilizing the prey is key, for once caught they must remain captured! Escaped prey is an immediate point deduction of one point per minute free. Points trailing into the negatives are bad, and reaching negative twenty points is an immediate disqualification of that member from the game. Using what rope you have left, or whatever belts, vines, or makeshift bondage equipment to incapacitate your prey will also effect your score. Simple rope tie? 2 points. Hog-tied with makeshift vine? 10 points. Gimp-suit made from poison oak? 45 points.


After each successful 'capture' a period of time is passed before releasing the prey back into the wild for the hunt to begin anew! After a week of enjoying the hunt, release your prey back into society and tally your points to determine group prizes!


Ta-dah! Instant fun for everyone! Except for your prey. They're going to be rather haggard after this whole ordeal. Their points tallied only determine how much they get to eat and sleep during this trip of theirs.
2010-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: That wouldn't work down here in the South... you'd end up with a truck full of rednecks who would tie you up instead and execute you with their shotguns (after they rape you of course)...
2010-02-21 @Not logged in user@: Dagurashibanipal!


Wait- Am I a bit late?
2010-02-21 Damn you Elftron!: *mumbles, then logs back on*
2010-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! You're not logged in.
2010-02-21 [Pillowthief]: *grumble*
2010-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Not only were you not logged in, but elftron called you a 'user'...
2010-02-21 [Pillowthief]: I paid it money too!
2010-02-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: See You Space Cowboy! *walks out*
2010-02-21 [Nekko fox]: To Misty's Comment:


/Otaku Nerd Reference
2010-02-21 [Pillowthief]: I would actually rather be watching Cowboy Bebop.


2010-02-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love Spike, he is badass!
2010-02-23 [Sunrose]: Nice status report btw :P
2010-02-23 [Pillowthief]: Tell that to Elftron! *shakes fist*
2010-02-23 [Sunrose]: Why? :P
2010-02-23 [Nekko fox]: Why not? P:
2010-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a status report!
2010-02-23 [Sunrose]: :O!
2010-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: That's the same face your mom made last night! ......because she choked on a piece of bread...... I'm sorry for your loss...
2010-02-23 [Sunrose]: I spoke to her on the phone today :P
2010-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Ghost!
2010-02-23 [Sunrose]: If that were possible :p
2010-02-23 [Nekko fox]: What, that she's a ghost, or that Mort is capable of remorse and/or compassion?
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! I'm a sweet guy! Just for that, I will run over your dog with a lawn mower.
2010-02-24 [Nekko fox]: It's a pity my dog is made out of pennies and lives in your china shop....
2010-02-24 [the wonderfall-man]: "Helcome to Joes appartment!!!"
2010-02-24 [Nekko fox]: FUCK YOU JOE!


*Kills him. Eats him. Gets branded a cannibal. Is misunderstood by society*
2010-02-24 [the wonderfall-man]: *army of cockroaches attack Nekko for revenge* Have you not seen the movie called Joe's Appartment? Its full of cockroaches in a apartment, owned by Joe, who attacking people when they try to take down the appartment. Theres even a cetchy song called Welcome to Joe's Appartment.
2010-02-24 [Nekko fox]: *Eats the cockroaches. Turns into Mort. Eats ramen*
2010-02-24 [the wonderfall-man]: *hits Nekko in the back of the head, turning her back to normal* There can only be one Mort. One is more than enough. He already goes through 5,000,000 bowls of ramen each day.
2010-02-24 [Nekko fox]: *Bashes you in the face with anti-matter, thusly removing it from everything forever*


I'm a he.
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: There can be only ONE! *chops off Nekko's head*
2010-02-24 [Nekko fox]: *All the cockroaches pour out and devour Mort. They all die of gastrointestinal distress*
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: At least... I think there can be only one... *checks the little sign in the elevator*... oh wait... it says there can be up to 15... as long as the weight doesn't exceed 2,500 lbs... *pushes Misty out of the elevator*...
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles*
2010-02-24 [Hedda]: Now when making a comment doesn't reload the page, it might actually be comfortable to post comments even here on this huge page...   
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Say what?
2010-02-24 [Sunrose]: Halleluja x)
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: just a question why is there a white box over my punctuations?
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.herbalcell.com/free-sheet-music/zelda-ocarina-of-time



I've gotta learn all these songs, so I can play them at appropriate times ('Market' at the flea market, 'Treasue Chest' when someone opens a box, 'Inside a House' when someone breaks into my house and holds me hostage at gunpoint...etc.)
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok then.
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: While you're still here, Wally...


  



This needs fixin'.
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: (he left already, didn't he?)
2010-02-24 [Sunrose]: He said something about making breakfast 15 minutes ago :P
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah, I see.
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Breakfast?!
2010-02-24 [Ninja Smurf]: whos cooking?
2010-02-24 [Hedda]: [Mortified Penguin]: I wrote about that in the news...
2010-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I never read the news though... I only click stuff that is blue...
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2010-02-24 [Nekko fox]: That's what she said.
2010-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2010-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks Misty upside the head*... you're late for practice! How are we ever gonna win the bronze if you keep showing up late?! ...now get up on that diving board!!! *points at a jagged pile of rocks beside a sewage dump*
2010-02-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes walking out of the sewage dump*... brr... it's cold in there... *takes a bath in the soup*...
2010-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Boy, you best get outta my toilet! *swings a soup ladle*
2010-02-25 [Paul Doyle]: Mix food coloring into the pancake batter, then cook it for a breathtaking blue and green breakfast :P
2010-02-25 [Nekko fox]: Screw your breakfast, it's too early for that. I already made dinner.


*Points to Mort*


He's delicious.
2010-02-25 [Devil in Me]: yum yum not you mmight get food poisioning!!!!
2010-02-25 [Nekko fox]: You mean that isn't the purpose of dinner?
2010-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I hope it is! ...that's what Bob's Diner's whole "dinner special" is all about! *points at the pile of corpses*
2010-02-26 [Devil in Me]: LOL for you guys it is i suppose. =D
2010-02-26 [Nekko fox]: *Cudgels you in the face with a dead badger* How dare you call my mother a....wait, what were we talking about?


*goes and sits on the fork pile. Has gas. Ignites the fork pile*
2010-02-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol You're crazy.
2010-02-28 [Pillowthief]: Im pretty sure Mort is a breakfast sandwich. Its on the menu.
2010-02-28 [Nekko fox]: Fuck your menu, and fuck your housing establishment for the under-privileged and crack addicted! GOD I'M HARDCORE!


*stomps on buildings full of orphans. Plays King Kong. Gets shot*
2010-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*puts the RPG back on the weapon rack*... that is third giant gorilla I've had to shoot today! *points at the corpses of Donkey Kong and Misty*
2010-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...I just realized that three out of four of my last comments involve me pointing at something... *points at the comments*...
2010-02-28 [Nekko fox]: *smacks Mort with an undead hand*


Stop it.
2010-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at you*... ow! That hurt! ...*points at the place where I got hit*... see? It's turning red!
2010-03-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's blood, stupid undead hand forgot to clip it's finger nails.
2010-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks a bottle over Misty's head*... where's that chimichanga I ordered, mister?! ...this diner ******* sucks!
2010-03-02 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Stares* what have I walked into?
2010-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, hello there! Welcome to Bob's D- TIMMY, YOU BETTER SHUT THE **** UP IN THERE!! *violently kicks a cage* JUST FOR THAT, NO WATER TONIGHT!!


...but, sir! I'm so thirsty!


THEN DRINK YOUR OWN BLOOD!! *fires a shotgun into the cage*


-iner, where we treat our customers like family. Have a seat anywhere and order when you're ready. Thank you for your service!


...*drags the cage away into a back room, leaving a trail of blood*... *a chainsaw and loud screams can be heard*...
2010-03-02 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Goes to a corner booth and puts the menu to her face*
2010-03-02 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko, the undead mascot, is busy pantomiming the meal options to a horrified elderly couple in the far corner, gesticulating more excitedly when he comes to the menu items that need to be killed before serving*
2010-03-02 [Araglas]: *comes out of the kitchen dressed as a waiter and walks over to [Nekko's Revenge]* May I take your order? And would you like to try one of our specials today?
2010-03-02 [Nekko fox]: *The undead Nekko waves a stump*


The special today is Parts That Fall Off The Mascot. I Promise most of my bits aren't gangrenous.
2010-03-02 [Araglas]: As you can see they are fresh as well!
2010-03-03 [Nekko's Revenge]: I think I'll take the Fresh Noob with Croutons, and some wine...
2010-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: One plate of Giraffe giblets and a warm bowl of tap water coming right up! ...*goes into the kitchen*... *crawls into the oven and falls asleep*...
2010-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...move it, stupid opossum! This is my bed! ...*tosses a Koala corpse out of the oven*...
2010-03-03 [Nekko's Revenge]: ..... >_> *puts her hands on the table, and realizes its sticky with some substance*


NEKKO! SAVE ME!!!


*The goo starts pulling her in*
2010-03-03 [Nekko fox]: *The undead mascot walks over and slurps up the brain matter that he left there*


Sorry about that. The rate of decay in the diner has increased exponentially ever since Mort forgot to pay for air conditioning. And then he murdered Santa.


*His arm falls off*


You see? There ya go.
2010-03-03 [Nekko's Revenge]: .... So I see...
2010-03-03 [Nekko fox]: *Throws a glass into the kitchen, hitting the oven Mort is sleeping in and causing it to melt inexplicably*


Hey, Mort, you begrumpled haggersnash! Pay the damned bills before I bill you for feeding my parts to the customers!
2010-03-04 [Pillowthief]: ...Dude.




I think she just called you a haggersnash.




Feed her to the lions! They haven't been fed in over a year!
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *Smacks Pillowthief with a limb*


I'm a guy damn it!


*More parts fell off*


................I WAS a guy, damn it! We zombies deserve better treatment! I'm going on strike!


*Goes out picketing. You can hear the picketers moaning outside in unison*


WHAT DO WE WANT?!


BRAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!


WHEN DO WE WANT THEM?!


BRAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNSSSSS!
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: I want my damned food by the time I get back....




*Starts picking up Nekko's dead falling limbs and walks outside, and starts sewing them back on*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses a grenade painted to look like a brain in the middle of the zombie mob*
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: HOLY SHI *runs and hits the ground*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I have an order of Damned Food here! ...here you are, ma'am. Your Sinner Burger (with extra spicy Hell Sauce), your Crucifries with the Blood of Christ dipping sauce (ketchup), and your Damn Good Shake. That'll be $6.66, please!
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *the Zombie Mob throws it back in. Then they start in on rum-running and start a Hooch Joint under the floors of Bob's Diner. Prohibition be damned!*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet down there!! *shoots randomly at the floor*
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *The Zombies shoot back*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *the floorboards under Misty give way and she falls through, killing many innocent zombies and even a mummy*
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *The zombies mourn the loss of their mummy and give it a beautiful burial, complete with touching eulogy. They crucify Misty for weight problems and vindictive spite. They erect the new Misty-Pole on the roof to collect birds and lightning*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *birds avoid it like some kind of gruesome scarecrow*... *lighting strikes Pillowthief instead*...
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: I feel like I've just fucking time warped to the most fucked place in the world... Eh. Fuck this. I'm chillin with the Zombies.
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *the Zombies embraced you with open arms and open mouths*
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: You see? They made you a beautiful painting to commemorate your joining them! MORT! Hang this shit on your wall!
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Laughs* Wow... I'm a zombie now! *Starts nomming on leftover human bits*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't have walls! ...and I'm not too sure where this floor came from...
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...that picture is sacrilicious!
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Starts chewing on Mort*
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...no! I'm not gonna end up supporting another kid, like the one I have with [Sunrose]! ...*locks himself in the freezer*... *eats frozen ramen*...
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Still nomming on your head*
2010-03-04 [Devil in Me]: LOL i'll bet Mort doesn't taste very good.
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Your mom begs to differ!
2010-03-04 [Devil in Me]: My Mom probably would, but then if you've seen the guys she's been with you would know she into the nasty tasting guys.
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I see, I see... *takes down some notes in a notepad*... and how is your relationship with your mother?
2010-03-04 [Devil in Me]: Taking note and drawing are two different things!!!
2010-03-04 [Devil in Me]: =D
2010-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... So I see... and how does that make you feel? ...*draws a cat in the notepad*...
2010-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko eats the notepad, cat and all. He goes into the kitchen to prepare something relatively unhealthy for the patrons*
2010-03-04 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Starts making things in the kitchen... Flour starts flying everywhere, all of a sudden there is a loud explosion and Adine screams* "IT WASN'T ME!"
2010-03-04 [Devil in Me]: ~ screams back~ i think it was!
2010-03-05 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko walks back, most of him on fire*


So, how are our patrons this evening?
2010-03-05 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Walks out, covered in flour and soot* I'm pretty stellar.
2010-03-06 [Pillowthief]: Fucking undead. Cant keep their limbs to themselves.


  



2010-03-06 [Pillowthief]: What's that you say? You dont look cool enough when you're killing zombies or flying an airship? Not to worry with these babies.


Narcissus Inc. Steampunk Goggles
2010-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Those don't seem too high quality. Can they withstand a cement block to the face? Or perhaps a walrus tusk directly to the eye? These are typical, everyday obstacles... I must know before purchase.
2010-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-03-06 [Pillowthief]: Instead of going for the heart, or other obvious organs, I usually just bite off their heads. That way you can't hear them scream.
2010-03-06 [Pillowthief]: And yes, they are Walrus Tusk approved, however they can not, as of yet, withstand a direct blow to the face with a cement block.


The structural integrity of the goggles can withstand it, but Im still working on the whole 'protection of the face' thing. Both of my lab subjects have died from it and I have yet to determine whether it was faulty equipment or if I was just throwing the cement block too hard. Regardless, I must recruit more test subjects before further research can continue.
2010-03-06 [Nekko fox]: Your comments remind me of a song called 'Big Ass Rock'.
2010-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: You can never throw a cement block too hard.
2010-03-07 [Pillowthief]: Hmm. Can't say Ive ever seen a big Ass-Rock. I found a Cock-Rock once, but it wasn't really that big...
2010-03-07 [Nekko fox]: Funny, I found a rock-ring for your cock-rock.
2010-03-07 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Just sits in the corner chewing on some random fleshy bits she's found*
2010-03-07 [Ninja Smurf]: OW! Thats my finger! *slaps Grenadine with a dead slimey thing*
2010-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: OW! That's my- ...wait... *checks pants*... no, nevermind...
2010-03-08 [Nekko fox]: Yes, Mort, you need one of those before it can be chewed on.
2010-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *Goes into the kitchen to prepare the dead animal he found burning on their doorstep. He assumes it was either a protest or a benefactor who wanted to donate food. Either way, it was becoming today's chili*
2010-03-08 [Pillowthief]: ...


Wonders where the Undead Fox found a Cock-Rock-Ring and why no one has asked about it earlier.
2010-03-08 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Tackles [Ninja Smurf] and starts chewing away*


*With a full mouth of flesh* heeee porbbabry had it onnn...
2010-03-08 [Pillowthief]: ...




Eww. Probably.
2010-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *Comes out with a burning pan full of questionable chili. It smells good. It probably tastes horrible*


I'll have you know that I never wear them. Except maybe as earrings.
2010-03-08 [Pillowthief]: ...


Eww. Probably.
2010-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *the contents of the pan spontaneously erupt into flames. Nekko pours it on Pillowthief, and the patrons of the diner get forks and knives*
2010-03-08 [Nekko's Revenge]: *Starts eataing Pillowthief*
2010-03-08 [Ninja Smurf]: Hey! Keep that in the bedroom!
2010-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *starts eating ninja smurf*
2010-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Keep that in the bedroom!
2010-03-08 [Ninja Smurf]: Well I am finger licking good.... but still... ewwwww
2010-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *Smacks your with the rock cock ring that stings*


Take that you slice of halibut!


*Misses you and smacks Misty. The wall collapses under the pressure*
2010-03-08 [Pillowthief]: I hate when people are eataing me.


Fucking zombies.
2010-03-09 [Nekko's Revenge]: Meh... You love it. or else you'd get your shotgun. :p
2010-03-09 [Nekko fox]: He can't Bill ate his shotgun. Something about iron deficiency....
2010-03-09 [Pillowthief]: Was wondering where that went.


Should have gave him some lead instead.
2010-03-09 [Ninja Smurf]: *sings off key* ohhh, shoulda given him lead instead
shoulda shot him in the head
2010-03-09 [Nekko fox]: *sings along. A few dogs start howling*


Oooh, then he woulda been dead
Fell face down in da bread
At least that's what momma said
2010-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out the Master Sword and violently decapitates Nekko*... *picks up his heart and stores it in a jar*... I'll eat this later. Hi-yah! *rides away into the distance*
2010-03-10 [Pillowthief]: d'd'Link, fill up your hearts! And Shoot your sword with power...d'd'




>>Initialize download of target: 'Group X' ... ... ... Starting sequence... ... ... Downloading... ... ...
2010-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Navi, I swear to God... if you don't shut up, I'll eat you too! *crams Pillowthief into a jar*
2010-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Ride, Epona! To Koriri forest! ...MWAHAHAHAA! *slays the Kokiri children* ...Revenge!
2010-03-10 [Nekko fox]: *The Great Deku Tree falls on Mort. Everything burns down. Everybody dies. Nekko is reborn from the ashes*
2010-03-12 [Pillowthief]: But I don't WANT to be an Avatar.


Why is there always a little boy without a fairy? Every time I start that game, swear to god, some kid comes up and starts on me, 'Hey, theres the boy without a fairy'. Gets on my nerves. Wish I was playing the Bards Tale so I could say something sarcastic back to him. Like, 'Shut up you hairy-boobie-face!'
2010-03-12 [Nekko fox]: Someone say "boobie"?



2010-03-12 [Paul Doyle]: (Just for laughs) Now here's some truly Deep Hurting, on a profound music-video level. Check out what happens when a 1980s hippie guitar hero wanna-be beseeches the Master. Who is the Master? Is he talking about the guy from Doctor Who? Or is this just another euphenism for Satan? Or he simply on drugs? Yes, Beavis and Butthead made fun of this one.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hyk-gmydbHs
2010-03-12 [Pillowthief]: Om nom nom.


  

2010-03-12 [Devil in Me]: LOL u are hilarious!
2010-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: She has a mouth big enough for Honeycomb!
2010-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *jumps out of a purple cake* BOO!
2010-03-13 [Nekko fox]: *Screams and shoots misty in the face with a spear gun*
2010-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *ducks down being missed by inches* Hey, what was that for?!
2010-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: For ruining my cake shaped pie! *shoots misty in the face with a harpoon launcher*
2010-03-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: *ducks* HEY! This isn't your's it's mine I made it myself.
2010-03-13 [Nekko fox]: *Screams at the sight of ruined cake shaped pie and shoots Misty in the face with a spear gun. It connects and nails her to the wall. She becomes Modern Art and art critics discuss with one another about the pain and suffering of the artist who created the piece. The rest of the diner enjoys the ruined pie/cake*


2010-03-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: You're an idiot Nekko. -_-
2010-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Shh! Artwork doesn't talk! *punches Misty in the balls*


*critics walk by*... "You can tell by the distortion of the face, that this piece is very reminiscent of Picasso's work."


"Ho ho! Indeed, Williams... indeed."


*they chortle wittily as they indulge in a glass of full bodied, 1977 Chateau LaTour L'Aspic Bob (or rather, Bob's Famous Rat Juice, but in a fancy bottle instead of a can)*
2010-03-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets off the wall* I'm not art work and I'm a girl you doof! *punch Mort in the face*
2010-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *the critics start clapping*
2010-03-14 [Mortified Penguin]: "It's so life-like!"
2010-03-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: Life-like, I'll give you life-like. *grabs a machine gun and starts shooting the Critics the gets arrested for murder* DAMN IT! Why does all the bad stuff happen to me?!
2010-03-14 [Devil in Me]: LOL it seems more like it's happening to me.
2010-03-14 [Nekko fox]: The great philosopher House once said "You can't say no if it isn't a question". According to Nickelback, sex is not a question. Ergo, rape is impossible.
2010-03-14 [Devil in Me]: LOL thats funny
2010-03-15 [Nekko fox]: Don't try to argue my wisdom.
2010-03-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *has escaped from prison* Who would do that? *rolls eyes*
2010-03-15 [Nekko fox]: *Calls security. And as an afterthought calls the thought-police*
2010-03-15 [Pillowthief]: I dont think you can call a secular hydro-addicted cane walking sarcastic son of a bitch a 'great philosopher'.


Besides, he'd probably break out of the psycho-ward to beat you up just for saying that.


And Nickelback is correct. Its not a question, more of an interrobang than anything else.
2010-03-15 [Nekko fox]: You haven't refuted my logic. You're simply pandering words. Now, time for the unscheduled sex.
2010-03-15 [Devil in Me]: NOOOOOOOO!
2010-03-15 [Nekko fox]: BRAHAHAHAHA!
2010-03-15 [Devil in Me]: yeeeeeep! ~run away terrified~
2010-03-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Stop scaring people Nekko, don't make me steal your pimp cane!
2010-03-16 [Pillowthief]: I was also told that 'Surprise' sex isnt rape either, its a 'present'.


  

2010-03-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH MY! O_O
2010-03-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-03-17 [the wonderfall-man]: Looks like a wana-be pimp. He can't be a pimp sence he's been ass wraped for years.
2010-03-17 [Nekko fox]: That would have been funny if it didn't sound so forced...


  

2010-03-17 [Nekko fox]: And what is an ass-wrap?
2010-03-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: I think he meant raped.
2010-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: It's like a chicken-wrap, but filled with donkey meat instead.
2010-03-17 [Nekko fox]: Mort, your brilliance never ceases to amaze, and blind, us all.
2010-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Excellent. *steals everyone's wallets while they're blinded*
2010-03-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *...and the Joker's wallet too*
2010-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...darn... all that's in here is like five joker cards and a condom...
2010-03-18 [Devil in Me]: Joker card and condoms sound like a fun date.
2010-03-18 [Nekko's Revenge]: only if you mix in a Harli Quinn outfit, some Absinthe, and a rave.
2010-03-18 [Nekko fox]: But Quinn never gets any action. Mr. J knows that.
2010-03-18 [Ninja Smurf]: The condom was actually Morts, and it expired back in 1997.
2010-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Why does the Joker have a condom of mine that expired when I was six?!
2010-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*reads comics behind the cash register instead of helping customers*...
2010-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-03-18 [the wonderfall-man]: Mort, stop masterbating to that and get back in here. I'm tired as hell of seeing that damn condom by my food while I try to eat my pierogies.
2010-03-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-03-19 [the wonderfall-man]: *shoots the cat* GOD DAMN IT!!!!! What the hell was that? *shoots it a couple of more times* I remember that cat. He stole my irish wiskey on St. Patty's Day. Damn whiskey stealer. *shoots it in the head to make sure its dead* *goes back to eating pierogies*
2010-03-19 [Nekko fox]: *It comes back to life and shits on your pierogies*


  

2010-03-19 [the wonderfall-man]: *rips cat's head off and sticks an arm in it looking for the bottle of whiskey* Here we are. *tears an unopened bottle of well aged Irish whiskey* *takes the cat's body and sticks it on a pole outside and watches a hurd of zombies fight over the head and body* I wish I had a twinkey right about now.
2010-03-20 [Sagacious Turkey]:    HUG ME.
2010-03-20 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ............dang it! What'd I tell you people about all these images?!
2010-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ....STUPID MISTY!!! *breaks a plastic ketchup bottle over his/her head*
2010-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: ...NOW YOU'VE BROKEN MY KETCHUP?!!?! Dude, now how am I gonna eat my tacos?! What? ...with barbecue sauce? That's a stupid idea. You're stupid!! *breaks a taco over Misty's head*
2010-03-20 [Pillowthief]:
*Im not a cigarette- You're a cigarette!*
2010-03-20 [Pillowthief]: *om nom nom* Corned beef is so good. Glad I dont eat at Bobs.
2010-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: But... what about our beefed corn? *a huge, muscly piece of corn bursts in and starts punching Misty in the face*


2010-03-21 [Nekko fox]: This is fucking hilarious.




  

2010-03-21 [Mortified Penguin]: So I don't suppose Misty ever got her chicken then?
2010-03-21 [Nekko fox]: PERHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
2010-03-21 [Pillowthief]: BRRAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
2010-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: DRAGO!! *punches Pillowthief* Take that, Russia!
2010-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes back to training in the freezer*... *punches the hamburger meat*...
2010-03-22 [Nekko fox]: *the hamburger meat is really Misty's congealed lard-sweat*
2010-03-25 [Pillowthief]: *walks into the room*
Yeah, take that Doppleganger! You get 'em Mort!
(Cause Im going to get 'em later, if you know what I mean... heh heh)
  

2010-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Btw, that cat is still giving me the creepys.
2010-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: If I had a doppleganger, I would crucify him and have him buried. Then, three days later, I would start walking around and be all like, "I'm back, you guys!"
2010-03-25 [Nekko fox]: You see that is why Easter bothers me so much. Everyone says "Easter bunny this, Easter bunny that!" I find that shit offensive. You see, here's how shit went down. There was a guy long ago with an awesome beard. He rocked that beard. He also thought it would be cool if everyone was nice to eachother for once. Feeling envious of his beard, and hating on his ludicrous ideas of friendship, the people nailed him to some wood. As an afterthought, they also stabbed him, just for having a beard. After a while, the locals felt that he was becoming an eyesore, that dead guy on a stick, so they took him down and buried him in a cave. A few days passed and then the dead guys respawn timer reached zero and he re-entered The Game, but he used his BRB time to look up some God-Mode cheats. So, illegally modded his character into a zombie rabbit who shat eggs. Minds were blown. When everyone was duly impressed, this dead guy turned egg-shitting zombie rabbit decided it would be a great idea to find a new server. He put in the No_Clip cheat and ascended into the clouds so that he can watch pregnant women take showers.


And THAT kids, is the story of Easter.


  

2010-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Im totally posting that on the Book of Face. I had totally forgotten about Easter, so by posting this epic story, I hope to fool the masses into thinking I really hadn't forgotten and all will be good.
2010-03-25 [Pillowthief]: Hmm. It seems this is the second time I've done this for stories from Nekko. Stop posting such cool shit, you're making me look bad.
2010-03-25 [Nekko fox]: What can I say, it's all copacetic.
2010-03-25 [Sunrose]: You're all uploading stolen images to Elftown..
2010-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: So's your face!
2010-03-25 [Sunrose]: Suck my cock..!
2010-03-25 [Nekko fox]: Yar, I be a pirate!


  

2010-03-26 [Pillowthief]: *Downloads pirate picture for future uploading* Actually, we're only promoting other peoples fine art work for others entertainment and satisfying our own selfish needs at the same time, more of borrowing reall- Wait.


Did Sunrose just insinuate that she has a- *le gasp*


Im not fixing that either, Sunrose. Seriously. Between the cheese and the hair and now this? Im definitely paying someone else.
2010-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, please... we all knew about Sunrose's extra parts. She spends half her day flashing children at the orphanage... *eats ramen*...
2010-03-29 [Pillowthief]: Forgot about that.
2010-03-29 [Nekko fox]: Now quiet yo, I'm practicing my guitar.


*Plays a fillet of fish. He then cooks it using just the friction from his fingers and feeds it to the customers. They all die and he starts cooking their bodies*
2010-03-29 [Araglas]: ....I'm out of zombies...I think I need a new supply...and a new Necromancer.....any ideas anyone?
2010-03-29 [Nekko fox]: *Points at Mort*


Ask him. He keeps bringing back Misty.
2010-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not the one bringing that thing back!
2010-03-30 [whitehot]: O_O
2010-03-30 [Nekko fox]: *Points at Mort*


Don't yell in the restaurant!
2010-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Diner! DINER!!! *choke slams an elderly man passing by*... *slams his face into a hot stove*... DDDIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRR!!!!! *starts shooting customers at random*
2010-03-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*looks at the sign outside*... wait... "Bob's Restaurant"? How long has this been here...? ...huh... well, I'll be damned... *picks up the burnt, bleeding old man*... *gently places his mangled body in a booth*... Hello, sir! What can I get you to drink this evening? *takes out a little notepad*
2010-03-31 [Nekko fox]: *the old mans bleeds to death at the booth. Nekko collects his blood and uses it in a dark, demonic ritual to summon cheaper help*
2010-03-31 [Araglas]: *pops out of a hell hole that opened up in the floor* Hey! I was in the middle of making a deal with the devil! Why'd you summon me?!
2010-03-31 [Nekko fox]: *smacks Araglas on the head with a ladel*


Mort is killing customers. Get to work.
2010-03-31 [Pillowthief]: http://www.eddsworld.co.uk/pages/flash/hellhole.htm
2010-04-01 [Nekko fox]: I deny your flash.


*puts [Araglas] to work*
2010-04-01 [the wonderfall-man]: *slams Mort's head through some walls and brakes the stove with him* Who are you and what did you do with Mort? He loved ramen. And you havent had ramen ever. WHO ARE YOU?!?!?! *soves Mort in the oven and starts baking him*
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! ...but... like four comments of mine ago... I... I.........


...Curse you! *pulls of mask* How did you know?!


I'm actually... Mertifried Ponguin!! Mwahahahaa!


*B's D inexplicably explodes, killing only Pillowthief*
2010-04-01 [Nekko fox]: *Everything suddenly becomes a sitcom. No one watches it except God. He becomes 100% of the fan base. No one believes in God anymore, and he disappears*
2010-04-01 [Pillowthief]: Crap.
2010-04-01 [Paul Doyle]:
How to Fix Elftown for 2010
2010-04-01 [Pillowthief]:
God.
Dammit.
Paul.


*Watch as I make a giant 'S'!*


God.
Dammit.
Nok.
2010-04-01 [Araglas]: *grumbles about low wages and not getting enough vacation time as I start to work on making food and things for the non customer people*
2010-04-01 [Pillowthief]: Stop feeding the Afghanistanianiens! We have enough problems with the Canadianians to have you add to our troubles.


Minions! Feed the unbeliever to the zombies!
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *is dragged away*... NNNOOOOO!! Not meeeee!
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pride of lions burst in start mauling Nok's face*
2010-04-01 [Sunrose]: So when are you going to prettyfy this wiki again?
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Never!! We have a strict 'never get rid of stuff' policy.
2010-04-01 [Sunrose]: Fuck that, it's terrible, ugly and makes the wiki way too long. Most of the shit happens in the comments anyway :P
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: There. Now it's beautiful.
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Your face is terrible, ugly and doesn't make anything long!
2010-04-01 [Sunrose]: It's better, but still terrible. What about that poll? You already know who won :P


Then we have something in common! =p
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: But... there could be a sudden influx of voters for [spitfire_35121]!
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: And B's D was never meant to look good... that would defeat its purpose, which... well, I have no idea what the purpose is. But it would be defeated!


Now, maze of guile looks good. Yet, nobody goes there anymore...
2010-04-01 [Sunrose]: Because you didn't spam with it as much (not that I'm advising to) :P
2010-04-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I invited like 500+ people though! Bunch of jerks!


Broccoli!!
2010-04-01 [Sunrose]: Still less spamming than this wiki :P
2010-04-01 [Ninja Smurf]: But Spam is the diners best and most expensive menu Item!
2010-04-01 [Nekko fox]: Rape
2010-04-01 [the wonderfall-man]: I love Spam. It tastes so good.
2010-04-02 [Nekko fox]: Spam in the place where I live (ham and pork)
Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (oh boy)
Spam in my luchbox at work (it's the best)
Really makes a darn good sandwhich any way you slice it at all


If you're running low, go to the store
Carry some money to help you buy more
The tab is there to open the can
The can is there to hold in the spam


Oh, spam on the table at home (ham and pork)
Think about selection, are there different flavors now (let's eat)
Spam in my office at work (it's the best)
Think about the stuff its made from, wonder if it's some kind of meat


If you need a spoon, keep one around
Carry a thermose to help wash it down
Now, if there's some left, don't just throw it out
Use it for spackle or bathroom grout, now


Spam in my pantry at home (have some more)
Think of expiration, better read the lable (oh boy)
Spam breakfast, dinner, or lunch (it's the best)
Think about how it's been precooked, wonder if I'll just eat it cold


Now, once you start in, you can't put it down
Don't leave it sitting or it'll turn brown
The key is going to open the tin
The tin is there to keep the spam in


Oh, spam (spam)
Ham and pork
Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (oh boy)
Spam (spam)
It's the best
Really makes a darn good sandwhich any way you slice it


Spam in the place where I live (have some more)
Think about addiction, wonder if I'm a junkie now (let's eat)
Spam in the place where I work (you're obsessed)
Think about the way it's processed, wonder if it's some kind of meat


Spam in the back of my car (ham and pork)
Spam any place that you are (ham and pork)
The tab is there to open the can (spam any place that you are) (ham and pork)
The can is there to hold in the spam (spam any place that you are) (ham and pork)
Spam.
2010-04-02 [the wonderfall-man]: I like the Spam song by Monty Python. I also love Corn Beef Hash...I wonder if Corn Beef Hash and Spam tastes good together. What do you all think? *randomly puts a gun to Mort's head* WHERE IS THE REAL MORT?!?! YOU DON"T EAT RAMEN!!!!
2010-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY PEEPS!
2010-04-02 [Paul Doyle]: Queen Peep?
http://www.furaffinity.net/view/31896/
  

2010-04-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Huh?
2010-04-02 [Paul Doyle]: Well, it is almost Easter, and Marshmallow Peeps are unavoidable in some parts of the world for the next few days.
2010-04-02 [Nekko fox]: That what she said. *Points at Misty*
2010-04-02 [Pillowthief]: Wasnt Easter last month? When's St Paddy's day? Im thirsty.
2010-04-02 [the wonderfall-man]: You have them back wards. St Patty's day was last month.
2010-04-02 [Nekko fox]: You've got it backwards again. Last month was All Saints day.
2010-04-03 [Pillowthief]: <- Doesnt give a shit. Only cares that he's thirsty.
2010-04-03 [Nekko fox]: <-- Cudgels you to death with a jug of water. The patrons of the diner pay handsomely to witness it. It gets put on youtube and goes viral, over forty-thousand views in one hour. Jesus himself lawls. Singing soon starts.
2010-04-03 [Nekko fox]: A Scotsman clad in kilt left the bar one evening fair
And one could tell by how he walked he'd drunk more than his share
He staggered on until he could no longer keep his feet
Then stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.


chorus:
Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
He stumbled off into the grass to sleep beside the street.


Later on two young and lovely girls just happened by,
And one says to the other with a twinkle in her eye
You see yon sleeping Scotsman who is young and handsome built
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilt.


Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
I wonder if it's true what they don't wear beneath their kilt.


They crept up to the sleeping Scotsman quiet as could be
Then lifted up his kilt about an inch so they could see
And there behold for them to view beneath his Scottish skirt
Was nothing but what God had graced him with upon his birth


Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
There was nothing there but what God gave upon his birth


They marveled for a moment then one said we'd best be gone
But let's leave a present for our friend before we move along
They took a blue silk ribbon and they tied it in a bow
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot's lifted kilt did show


Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
Around the bonnie spar that the Scot's lifted kilt did show


The Scotsman woke to nature's call and stumbled toward a tree
Behind a bush he lifts his kilt and gawks at what he sees
Then in a startled voice he says to what's before his eyes
He said, 'Lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first
prize'


Ring ding diddle diddle i de o
Ring di diddle i o
He said, 'Lad I don't know where you've been but I see you won first prize'
2010-04-04 [Pillowthief]: Funny, I just got told that last night.






By your mom.
2010-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, snap! You just got TOLD!






......that last night. By your mom.
2010-04-04 [Nekko fox]: It's funny, cuz she heard that from YOUR mom. Turns out, she always was a bit of a voyeur.
2010-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a cigarette! *pushes Nekko*
2010-04-04 [Nekko fox]: No....


  

2010-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, really? I had an uncle who was a Chezebrelephaffe. He used to come over and graze on the grass in our backyard. But sometimes my mom would leave the gate open and he would get out and start pouncing on the neighbor children... after the third time he killed and ate a little kid, we had to put him down...
2010-04-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-04-04 [Pillowthief]: Didn't that guy used to work at Mallwart? Im pretty sure.
2010-04-04 [Pillowthief]: And Im not quite too sure what a Chezebrelephaffe is, but I think its on the same page as [Sunrose]'s appendage.


Which, by the way, she told Mort to suck.
2010-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...hmm... *breathes*... interesting... *stops breathing*... *glances around*... *starts breathing again*... fascinating! ...*jots something down in a notepad*...
2010-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*picks up a fork*... *sketches it in the notepad*... *examines it closely*... *stabs Misty 42 times in the face with it*... simply amazing! ...*records the results*... *takes a blood sample*...
2010-04-05 [the wonderfall-man]: I love that song up above. I herd it at an irish pub in Florida.
2010-04-05 [Duke Devlin]: Holy Unholy Zombie-Jesus YesterDay! I haven't commented here since February! D: This is wrong. :(
2010-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Not sure, but heroine is your answer.


*serves complimentary heroine to all the customers. It's laced with roughly forty-nine intoxicants and highly lethal toxins, none of which are FDA approved*
2010-04-05 [Pillowthief]: Heroine? Like Wonder Woman?


I dont think shes really toxic. Now the Toxic Avenger- maybe.
  

2010-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Nah, he's from New Jersey. Nothing interesting comes from there.
2010-04-05 [Pillowthief]: ...comes from there, anymore. He was the last.


Shortly after the video-game came out, the Toxic Avenger had a meltdown and the drama that ensued on Maury eventually lead him to quitting his job and starring in the B-rated movie, 'The Goonies'. Shortly after that, he succumbed to cancer.
2010-04-05 [Nekko fox]: *There was a grand rejoicing*
2010-04-05 [the wonderfall-man]: Then a hard winter came over them, and they were forced to eat Mortified Penguin. And there was much rejoicing.
2010-04-05 [Nekko fox]: *Muffled 'yay'*
2010-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: And suddenly, they all got indigestion! And liver flukes!!
2010-04-06 [Pillowthief]: You're a liver fluke!
2010-04-06 [Nekko fox]: *raises a hand groggily*


Sorry guys, I just fluked in in your liver...
2010-04-06 [Pillowthief]: Communist!
2010-04-06 [Nekko fox]: Socialist!
2010-04-06 [Pillowthief]: Marxist!
2010-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Publicist!
2010-04-06 [Devil in Me]: Reformist!
2010-04-06 [twitchboy]: Anarchist!
2010-04-06 [Aliz]: Pessimist!
2010-04-06 [Nekko fox]: Eugenicist!
2010-04-06 [Lily~]: Excorsist!
2010-04-06 [Aliz]: Activist!
2010-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Wrist!
2010-04-06 [Aliz]: FIST!
2010-04-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Sunkist!
2010-04-06 [Nekko fox]: CYST!
2010-04-07 [Lily~]: TRYST!
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: LIST!
2010-04-07 [Lily~]: MISSED!! wait.... uhhhh.... GIST! XD!!!
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia.
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: ...
2010-04-07 [Lily~]: woah. I would suggest mist... unless someone already got it? lol
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: Fuck you mist. I claimed word superiority.
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: In fact, PNEUMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANOCONIOSIS!
2010-04-07 [Pillowthief]: That's not a real word.


I deny you!
2010-04-07 [Lameguest007]: Play OMGPOP and get to level 10 as fast as you can for me . I need your help so I could get some bonus things . Just get to level 10 AT THE LEAST please <3


Instructions:


1. http://www.omgpop.com/?r=8ehv



2. copy and past that link .


3. make a profile . like sign up for the game . you're going to have to follow the instructions .


4. play games until you're level 10 . at least level up to 2 right away .


5. you can get to level 10 later .


6. but get to level 2 !


Message Me If You Joined For Me <333
Please and Thanks <333
2010-04-07 [Flisky]: ......
2010-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: .......!
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: Ellipsis ellipsis question mark exclamation point confused emoticon ellipsis.


And to pillow thief:


Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis is, according to the Oxford English Dictionary, "a factitious word alleged to mean 'a lung disease caused by the inhalation of very fine silica dust, causing inflammation in the lungs.'" A condition meeting the word's definition is normally called silicosis.


Wikipedia, best friend of the lazy and well-informed.
2010-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Pah. Since when has Oxford English Dictionary been considered credible? Show me where a legitimate publication has accepted the word! Like the New York Times! ...or Penthouse!


I also deny you!
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: Penthouse used it when they were describing your mother in the centerfold of the January 1973 edition.
2010-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it. You extensively know your Penthouse, sir... Impressive.
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: Nah, just your mother.
2010-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: You really are a furry! ...*eats ramen*... *picks the roaches out*...
2010-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*a large moth swoops in and lands in my ramen*... *it starts drowning and shrieking loudly*... *eats around it*...
2010-04-07 [Nekko fox]: *Points at the menu*


  

2010-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, considering there is a stack of at least fifteen dead health inspectors in the corner over there, I'd say we're lucky to have lasted this long... *the moth finally stops shrieking and dissolves into the ramen*... *keeps eating*...
2010-04-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: So you've finally been shut down eh?
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... that's just a sign we put up when we're on break and don't wish to be bothered by annoying customers. *points out the window*... *a large group of zombies is moaning and banging on the door*...


...WE'RE ON BREAK, DANG IT!! *tosses a grenade out the window*
2010-04-08 [Pillowthief]: Damn you Neeeeeekkoooooo!!! *Shakes fist*






You don't seem to have any pants on. I still deny you- You and your silly word too.
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: That reminds me of a comic of mine in which the Blockbuster movie rental guy came to pick up some porn from Mr. Rogers's house without wearing pants for some reason... goooooood times... but also disturbing times. Yes, mostly disturbing. *shudders*... *drowns the gloomies with some fine Cognac*...
2010-04-08 [Pillowthief]: Ugh. For some reason I just got the theme song of 'Howard the Duck', a cheesy 90's tv show, stuck in my head. I think I'll go purge it with some gasoline or something.
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: We keep the gasoline in the closet, next to that heater that always randomly sparks... *starts lining up some shot glasses*...


LET'S DO THIS! *smashes Misty's face into the table*... RRRRAAAAAAAAHHH!! *takes a shot*
2010-04-08 [Sunrose]: That's a whole lot less crap :O
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a whole lot less crap!
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...BREAK OVER! BACK TO WORK!! *throws a brick at Pillowthief*


Get back to whatever it is we're paying you for!
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *tazes Nekko in the face*... I'm docking your pay!!!
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *chops off Sunrose's appendage*... YOU'RE FIRED!!!!7!!
2010-04-08 [Sunrose]: Ah shit, everything is back :p
2010-04-08 [Pillowthief]: How'd a '7' get in the middle of that?


Anyways, now that Sunrose no longer has an arm, Im going to have to pay someone to attach it back. Man, this is becoming expensive.






LET'S DO THIS! *smashes Misty's face into the table*... RRRRAAAAAAAAHHH!! *takes a shot*
2010-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: LET'S DO THAT! *smashes a table into Misty's face*... RRRRAAAAAAAHHH!! *tries to take a shot, but somehow ends up shooting Nok instead*
2010-04-08 [Nekko fox]: LET'S KEEP DOING THAT! *smashes a face with misty's table* RRRRAAAAAAAAHHH!! *Shoots mort and Pillowthief"


Well, shit, this is getting awkward.
2010-04-09 [Pillowthief]: Broccoli!
2010-04-09 [Devil in Me]: And cheese. =D
2010-04-10 [Nekko fox]: And then you put on your rape face.
2010-04-10 [Pillowthief]: *Puts on his Interrobang face*
2010-04-11 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-04-11 [Ninja Smurf]: Fuuurrrrbbby!
2010-04-12 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-04-12 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-04-12 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-04-12 [Pillowthief]: Broccoli!
2010-04-12 [Nekko fox]: Fuck you and yo couch.
2010-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *couch*
2010-04-12 [Nekko fox]: *Fucks it*
2010-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *!*
2010-04-13 [the wonderfall-man]: *starts fucking Duke Devlin because of Nekko starting a fuck contest* At least I'm not raping a guy couch.
2010-04-13 [Nekko fox]: Actually, the couch, being androgynous, has become a female due to the lack of females in the area. Like a frog.


*Frog-cest is the best*
2010-04-13 [Duke Devlin]: Dude... Duke doesn't get fucked. He fucks others. >______>
You don't do that shit to me... There are a *few* on here that are allowed. ;)
2010-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *a unicorn suddenly bursts in and rapes Duke Devlin*
2010-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa... was she any good, unicorn?


*he laughs, says "Neeeeeiiigghhh!!", and flies away though the roof*
2010-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ******* UNICORNS!! ...*patches up the hole in the roof with super glue, duct tape, and newspapers*...
2010-04-13 [Nekko fox]: *The Unicorn explodes through the newspaper but is stopped short by the divine power of duct tape. It dies struggling for its freedom. A duct tape spider begins cocooning it with duct tape suck the unicorns rainbow goodness later.*
2010-04-14 [Duke Devlin]: Wow.. That was eventful. =/ D8<
*hurts* XD
2010-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *the unicorn, still barely alive and fearing for its life, initiates its self-destruct sequence*... *the explosion rips a hole in the fabric of space and time, as is typical of a unicorn explosion*... *the hole becomes a black hole and starts sucking up customers*... *Misty collides with the black hole, causing a large explosion that completely melts the fork pile*... *both Misty and the black hole cease to exist*...
2010-04-14 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my... *munches on bacon*
2010-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup... these things happen... *eats ramen*...
2010-04-14 [Duke Devlin]: Damn... Such a shame...
2010-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I know... that poor fork pile! ...they're twirling spaghetti up in heaven now...
2010-04-14 [Duke Devlin]: ... Is there spaghetti in heaven!? D:
2010-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: There better be! ...or else a lot of Italians are going to be displeased...
2010-04-14 [the wonderfall-man]: *starts singing all parts to Another Brick In The Wall. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGvkebKlM_4*
2010-04-14 [Duke Devlin]: Gosh darn it. *sets the wonderfall-man on fire*
2010-04-15 [Nekko fox]: Oooh, nice fire! *Gets marshmallows and sharpened sticks. He stabs wonderfall-man with the sticks, skewering him, and them puts the marshmallows on the end of each stick*


Mmmm, jet-puffed goodness on a stick!
2010-04-15 [Duke Devlin]: Mmm looks good. *takes a bite#8
2010-04-16 [Nekko fox]: Good monkey.
2010-04-16 [Pillowthief]: *chews on monkey#8
2010-04-16 [Duke Devlin]: Oh my! D:
2010-04-16 [Nekko fox]: Poor duke...
2010-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Get your own monkey!! ...*pushes Pillowthief down some stairs, despite that we are on the 1st floor and have no basement either*... *gnaws on monkey#8...
2010-04-17 [Pillowthief]: M.C. Escher's stairs? When did we get these?!? Aggggghhpmhp. Phumph, aghphump. *lands impossibly back on the landing he started at* Damn you fantasy sketcher M. C. Escher!
2010-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts a slinky on the stairs*


"Sideways slinky!! Witchcraft!!" *an angry mob forms around the diner*
2010-04-17 [Pillowthief]: *the angry mob gets eaten by the zombies and random hungry Palestinians, who are obviously advent fanatics of the sideways slinky*
2010-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Those zombies are still out there...?


*walks outside*


I FREAKIN' TOLD YOU ALREADY! CALL IN AND GET A RESERVATION, YOU MORONS! This is a FANCY restaurant, dang it! Not some piece of crap you can just show up at and expect to be seated right away!! *the rusted 'B' on the Bob's Diner sign falls off and crushes 14 zombies*... And we require proper attire! Tuxedos! NO SUITS! *points at a zombie dressed in a business suit*... *he moans sadly and limps away in a typical zombie fashion*...


*slams the door, which causes the lights to flicker and the refrigerator to explode*


Stupid hicks... This is ob's Diner, not McDonald's! They need to learn to be a little more classy... *goes back behind the register and starts reading a porno*... *a rat scurries by with a cockroach in its mouth*...
2010-04-17 [nokaredes]: "ob's Diner"? Did we change the name in my absence?
2010-04-17 [Araglas]: *is cleaning a dirty dish with a dirty rag* No clue....I need those zombies...*grabs a shotgun and a few bags and heads outside, loud explosions can be heard as well as zombie cries of pain*
2010-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at the sign outside*... it clearly says 'ob's Diner' now.
2010-04-17 [Nekko fox]: *Leans out the door of Ob's Diner and shouts at Araglas*


You idiot! Zombies don't feel pain! Quit shooting the elderly! The buckshot ends up wedged in their meat! Use you machete!
2010-04-17 [Aliz]: ...Ob's diner= horrible mental image D:
(here, an ob is the same as tampon O________o')
2010-04-18 [Nekko fox]: Ob's Diner IS a horrible mental image!


*It disappears when people stop thinking about it. Bob's Diner returns*
2010-04-18 [Pillowthief]: Eww. Wait. Eww.
2010-04-18 [Nekko fox]: Quiet you! *smacks Pillowthief*
2010-04-18 [Araglas]: Hey! The elderly are just as good, and the buckshot helps flavor the meat! *grumbles and pulls out a machete and starts slicing up zombies*
2010-04-18 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Could I get the recipe for artichoke pie?
2010-04-19 [Pillowthief]: Arti didnt choke to death! We drowned him!
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... he did choke. On water. When we were drowning him.
2010-04-19 [Pillowthief]: I pretty sure he just drown. And even if he did, I thought we made him into a stew, not a pie.
2010-04-19 [Pillowthief]: I wonder if he meant stewchoke pie... We choked him last week.
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Stew? Wait... wasn't that the guy we burned?
2010-04-19 [Nekko fox]: No, the water killed him. With a water pistol. Full of buckshot.
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Can you paint with all the colors of the wind?! *starts slapping Nok around* CAN YOU?? *shivs Nok in the kidney*


*tosses Nok's lifeless body into the freezer*... we need to class this joint up a little more... maybe buy an actual ceiling... and chairs! ...and a piano over where the fork pile used to be... and maybe even a cash register! ...not that the money sock with the calculator glued to the side isn't working well, it's just... it's kinda filled with spiders... and pouring super glue into the sock didn't help... now the spiders have money attached to them... which they use as hang gliders... *spider flies by and grabs a fly out of midair*...
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: No, Colonel Mustard killed him. With the hatchet. In the kitchen.
2010-04-19 [Nekko fox]: *Raises a hand*


I was there. I saw it.
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: "Whot?! He's lying! I'm not a colonel!!" *he slams his tea cup into the table angrily*


Oh, crap. He's got a point there... so sorry, Lieutenant General Mustard, sir. *salutes*


"Oh, that's quite alright. It's a common mistake..." *he cleans the blood off his hatchet and continues sipping his tea*
2010-04-19 [Nekko fox]: *Prepares the dead body for supper*
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Garlic up that foot real good, boy. I'm hongry.
2010-04-19 [Nekko fox]: *Adds garlic just for Mort. Everyone else gets sick from the meal*
2010-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Eww... what is this crap?! I hate garlic! ...*throws the foot in the trash*... *eats ramen instead*...
2010-04-19 [Pillowthief]: Careful, you might get that restraining order after all.
And wtf? She doesn't want to add to the fiscal comment count? Good thing we ate her.
2010-04-19 [Glitch Sprockyt]: This really seems like a place I can be myself.
2010-04-19 [the wonderfall-man]: I'm bored as hell... *rapes the closest girl to me*
2010-04-19 [Glitch Sprockyt]: -Holds out a mousetrap like a knife- Wow, cool, do you like scorpion suckers?
2010-04-19 [the wonderfall-man]: A what? *eats a live scorpion in one gulp then starts chewing bigger one, tain first* Don't think I ever had a scorpion sucker, is it any good?
2010-04-19 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Yes, unless it's lemon. They're better dipped in chocolate anyhow.
2010-04-19 [the wonderfall-man]: I love chocolate. I'm a choco-holic. *takes a chocolate covered scorpion and starts eating it* Thats realy good. *dips a live scorpion in chocolate and eats its head off* Live scorpions are realy good too.
2010-04-19 [Glitch Sprockyt]: I prefer them to be dead...I just can't stand the screaming.
Crickets, however...I WILL eat live crickets. The bastards.
2010-04-19 [the wonderfall-man]: I wonder why girly-girls scream and yell if theres a bug, like a cricket or somthing, near them.
2010-04-19 [Glitch Sprockyt]: I have a really crude answer for that.
2010-04-20 [Nekko fox]: Personally, I'm a rage-aholic. I can't get enough of that delicious rage-ahol.
2010-04-20 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Sounds like something sold at a porn shop as opposed to a gas station.
2010-04-20 [Nekko fox]: Screw you and the gas station that fueled the horse you rode in on! *Set Silver Lining and his gas-powered horse on fire*


*As an afterthought, he burns down the gas station as well*
2010-04-20 [Glitch Sprockyt]: -Completely unhurt by fire.- Don't even start.
2010-04-20 [Nekko fox]: *Starts*
2010-04-20 [Glitch Sprockyt]: HOW DARE THEE! Ow. Headache. -Heads for the dungeon.-
2010-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: MY GAS STATION!! That's where I kept all my MONEY!!! *leaps into the burning wreckage*... *comes walking out*... Oh, thank God! ...there was still some jalapenos for these cheese fries... *eats cheese fries*... OH, SH*T! THE MONEY!! *leaps back into the fire*... *comes back out with some ketchup*... *puts ketchup on the cheese fries*...


Wait... I feel like I'm forgetting someth- OH, CRAP!!! *jumps into the fire*... *comes back out, smokey and singed*... almost forgot the mustard... *eats cheese fries*...
2010-04-20 [Nekko fox]: *Points at Silver Lining's retreating form*


He took your money to pay for his horse's gas.
2010-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Makes sense... it's pretty frickin expensive to fill up a horse these days... that's why I switched to a hybrid. *points at a half-horse, half-fish monstrosity*... *it flops around and screeches loudly*...
2010-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs a scythe and his owl gun*... Well. Imma goin' gardenin'. If I ain't back by sunup, I'm gonna need someone to stir the soup. *points at the toilet*


HYAH! *whips a tractor*
2010-04-20 [Nekko fox]: *Watches tearfully as Mort rides into the sunset, bursting into flame and fizzling away when he hits the corona*
2010-04-20 [Devil in Me]: Don't cry Thats funny! Hahaha!
2010-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, what? Are you calling me a drunk? Are you saying I hit the Corona because I'm a MexicAAAAAAAAAAAA!!! IT BURNS!!
2010-04-21 [Nekko fox]: *Looks around*


So. Who didn't see that coming?
2010-04-21 [Pillowthief]: *Raises hand* Caught me by surprise. Always knew he was a drunk though.


Alcoholics go to classes and I can't imagine Mort doing that, so must be a drunk.
2010-04-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: We do shots at my AA.
2010-04-21 [Nekko fox]: Buckshots? How do you drink all that elk at once?
2010-04-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Horse semen.
2010-04-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Well, I think I just outgrossed myself.
I apologize.
2010-04-21 [Nekko fox]: No no, that's the soup of the day here at Ob Bob's Diner.
2010-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from a bowl of soup*... hmm?!!
2010-04-21 [Devil in Me]: LOL Glad i didn't order that!!! ~looks down~ OMG! i did!! EWWWW!
2010-04-21 [Nekko fox]: Which is weird because I could have sworn that i set that horse on fire...
2010-04-21 [Devil in Me]: Eww It's Burnt Too>
2010-04-21 [Nekko fox]: Fricasseed. We prefer to call it fricasseed.
2010-04-21 [Pillowthief]: Glad I went with the orange juice today. *looks down at something liquidy-off-orange colored*
2010-04-22 [Nekko fox]: Oh, no, we just added pumpkin to the seminal fluid today. We ran out of orange juice, so we improvised.
2010-04-22 [Pillowthief]: What's a good off the wall movie that would fit under the category, 'Fucking awesome, but never got around to buying and now that you reminded me of it, I hate you'?
2010-04-22 [Teufelsweib]: who would have ever thought that after all the time, this wiki would be one of the few which are still active
2010-04-22 [KyraMina]: Wow... Just... Wow. How long have ya'll been active? Mine died ere it twas born. LOL
2010-04-22 [Nekko fox]: Bob Ob Bobomb's diner has been alive since...whenever. We lynched the original proprietor, shot the second manager, blew up the third owner, and now Mort and Sagacious seem to run the joint, so we aren't too sure. And by run, I mean mutilate. And by mutilate, I mean cook. And when I refer to cooking, it involves customers, roadkill, and Health Inspectors.
2010-04-22 [Pillowthief]: They're tasty.
OSHA keeps sending them, and we keep serving them.
For dinner.
2010-04-22 [Pillowthief]: Also, I want to remind you that today is Earth Day. Captain Planet says, 'No!' to un-environmentalism. Or he'll fucking kill you.
2010-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *cuts down a tree*... *dumps toxic sewage in the street*...
2010-04-22 [Nekko fox]: *Laughs maniacally and builds a machine that randomly vomits copious amounts of fraudulent documents using California Red Wood trees, pumping out tons of exhaust created by burning The Governator's anger for no reason*
2010-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...alright! ...TWO Bob's Diners!
2010-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait! That must mean there are two Morts! ...I better kill that bastard before he tries to kill me... *gets the 'Mort gun' off the wall*...
2010-04-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: That is the second time that image has been used on B's D... and furthermore, I- *gets shot by the other Mort*
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Image stealer! I should find the guy I stole that from and complain!
2010-04-23 [Nekko fox]: I'm all ears.


*Is literally a being made entirely or ears*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *screams into a megaphone at Nekko*
2010-04-23 [Nekko fox]: WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?! I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid non-functioning ears! *punches you in the ear(s)*
2010-04-23 [Nekko fox]: *They fall off. Turns out they were really gnomes...*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: What?!! Stupid [Sunrose]! How dare you make this piece of crap look better?!
2010-04-23 [Sunrose]: [pixish] made you some fanart, I just added it to the wiki :P
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: The comments are what's important though... couldn't [pixish] have just made several thousand comments instead?
2010-04-23 [Sunrose]: This page has become way more awesome, it should lure more people and turn them into commentors :O
Plus, you can use one of the images as a banner on your house, to advertise!
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: But... we have like twenty banners already! And people aren't going to show up, just because I have a banner in my house... they show up because I spam them and threaten their families. Besides... the only people who look at my house are guards, people reporting me, and weirdos (that are usually already commenting anyway).
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...and people from now...
2010-04-23 [Sunrose]: The other banners were ugly and probably mostly illegal. Now there's a pretty and legal one, that others besides you can advertise with. People like me for instance, in my case reaching a wider variety of potential audience :P
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: [Pillowthief]/[Tiger Shark] might take offense to that!





...but then again, nobody cares about them anyway...


What B's D needs is a nice, permanent link on the side of Elftown or something...


  

2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: And perhaps a nice warning flashing at the top of the page that advises all members to eat at Bob's Diner or be banned from ET...
2010-04-23 [Sunrose]: That badge is stolen from Elftown's original badge (thus most of it isn't self made), and it has an ugly background rather than transparent!


Haha you can ask for it, but I doubt it will happen =p
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I had gotten Artsie to put a link in her house, but I believe she took it down... *eats ramen*...
2010-04-23 [Sunrose]: I'm not impressed :p
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: It didn't bring in anyone new anyway...


As for the special of the day image, we actually have one for every day of the week.


  
  
  
  
  
  
  



...we just don't use them... because [Pillowthief] is too lazy to change them...
2010-04-23 [Sunrose]: Yes I saw them :p
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: The 'visitors' section doesn't seem to have a purpose anymore, since the counter doesn't work...
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Dont blame me for the ugly background- Elftron, for some reason, is racist against transparency when coming from me and my computers.


I had to make two freakin' different ones, ugly green background and ugly light-green background because of this uncensored abuse by Elftron. *shakes fist*
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: And I like the new Bobs. Its cute.
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *appears out of thin air* Did you miss me Mort?
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: What's wrong Mr. Pillowthief?
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Thats 'Mr.' Pill- Oh.
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I thought we killed that thing... several times! *harpoons Misty*
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: You can't kill what's already dead. *poof*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: But... we kill zombies, strippers, and pillowthiefs all the time and they're already dead (at least on the inside)!
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Pillowthieves. Me and my sex slave clones deserve proper grammar.
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, well I'm a vampire, I'm Dracula's servant.
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Pillowthiefs!!


You're lucky you're a vampire. You don't have to see yourself whenever you look in a mirror!
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: I know, isn't it wonderful?
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Stop killing my strippers!
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *raise eyebrow*
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Young man, don't you raise that eyebrow at me!


*cuts off Misty's eyebrow, along with a large portion of her face*


You'll get this back at the end of the year. *puts it in a drawer*
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey, I need that! *steals my eyebrow and the half of my face back and reattaches it*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Here, I'll help... *violently staples the misty chunk back on upside down*...
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: And it's about time you people started respecting my greatness! These Turkey sculptures around here are a nice touch. But they might look better golden.
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey! *puts it back on right side up* Please don't try to help me reattach things again.
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! I SAID NO.


*cuts off Misty's arms and entire head*


You'll get these back at the end of the year!!


*throws them in a drawer full of rusty nails, acid, party hats, and unicorn bones*
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gets them back before they are injured and puts them back on* You bastard! *shoves a rusty nail in your eye*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Here, I'll help you put those back on... *hot glues misty's arm to her back*...
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: I already put it on you dork.
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Heeeeeyyy... Why ARE there turkeys? Your contribution to the comments this year has been... less than satisfactory.
I think we should have a raccoon or something.
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: What did I JUST tell you!?!


*puts Misty in the drawer*


You'll get out at the end of the year.


*dumps a box of venomous spiders into the drawer as well*
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Or a penguin, that mother fucker is everywhere. *eats the spiders*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Penguins are stupid. We need FIGHTER JETS!
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, Ok. *pops out of the drawer*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Vroom vroom! Whhooooosh! ...*plays with a toy jet*... Oh no, captain! We're closing in on some kind of hideous mountain! ...*crashes it into misty's face*... NNOOOO!! We'll save you!! *crashes a toy 747 into misty's face too*... *lights her face on fire for effect*...
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *throws water and flour on my face*
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Just because raccoons are one of the main ingredients in the casserole doesn't mean we should honor them.
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: I agree with Turkey.
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a pie in misty's face*... I'm helping! ...and I heard that the only way to get rid of a fire is with... more fire! *lights misty's face on fire again*
2010-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe not, but it sure is delicious... *eats some casserole*...
2010-04-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Maybe. *wipes the pie off my face*
2010-04-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes out of the kitchen with bloody gloves and an axe*


Uh... here, hold these for me. *hands them to Misty*


*dramatically jumps out the window*
2010-04-23 [Pillowthief]: Why the flour?


I mean, sure, I'd throw water on my face if it was on fire, but flour?


Wouldn't that just make, like, a paste or something? I wonder if flour is flammable... Wheat is pretty flammable.
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: *The zombies, waiting for just a dramatic exit out the window, catch Turkey and start to chew on him, dramatically*
2010-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nooooo!! That's my second favorite arm! *takes my arm of a zombie's mouth*... *beats away other zombies with the severed arm*...


*bursts back in through the door*


Sorry. I forgot my keys.


*dramatically jumps out the window again*
2010-04-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *tosses the bloody gloves and axe out the window after Turkey* Actually you use flour to put out grease fires.
2010-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: So... you're saying your face is greasy enough for a grease fire?
2010-04-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: At the moment it is, I cooked bacon on it.
2010-04-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts back in through the door again*


Sorry. I forgot I don't even own a car. I don't know whos keys these are...


*dramatically jumps out the window again*
2010-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *pushes the 'reset' button on [Pillowthief]'s back*
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: I think that you're thinking of baking-soda.
I think flour is flammable.
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: Crap. That was weird.
2010-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty's face?
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: Uh, no.


It was more of a, 'Lets Do The Time Warp Agaaain' kind of weird.
2010-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, that's what your reset button is for.


*pushes it repeatedly*
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2010-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Woops... it got stuck... *jams a knife in [Pillowthief]'s back to try and get the button unstuck*... crap... I'm gonna need a screwdriver...


To the hardware store! *dramatically drives my tractor out the window into the zombie mob*
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: Gah!
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: What the bloody hell?! Stop that!
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: I think there might be something wrong with my internetz. Hopefully its fixed now.
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: ... I just caught the comment about Misty1 cooking bacon on her face.




Im not quite too sure why no ones made a joke yet.
2010-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not quite sure how to make a joke about Misty's face... it's already a joke. *throws away face bacon*
2010-04-24 [Nekko fox]: Hey, we could have mixed that face bacon with our left-over food Inspector.
2010-04-24 [Sunrose]: :O
2010-04-24 [Pillowthief]: You really need to stop using that emote, Sunrose. Everytime I see it I keep thinking that you're trying to tell me something.

2010-04-25 [Nekko fox]: Smile like a donut!
2010-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Sunrose likes the creme filled ones.
2010-04-25 [Sunrose]: Maybe.. :o
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up!!
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *sacrifices a goat*
2010-04-27 [Ninja Smurf]: A goats too good to sacrifice! *sacrifices Mort*
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: But I am a goat! *eats hay*... *does goat things*... *plots [Sunrose]'s downfall, as goats often do*...
2010-04-27 [Ninja Smurf]: Yuck! I stepped in your goat thins! *wipes shoe on Morts face*
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Goats don't have faces, stupid. Didn't you learn anything in Geometry? ...*eats goat ramen*...
2010-04-27 [Pillowthief]: *George Clooney bursts in, jedi-style, then proceeds to have a staring contest with the Mort-goat!*


*Clooneyisawesoome14 rolls 2d4+2!*
*Mortified_Goat saves!*
*Mortified_Goat rolls 2d6+0!*
*Clooneyisawesoome14's save fails!*
*Clooneyisawesoome14 is hit with 11 damage!*
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: NNOOOO!!! *goat Mort dies of a sudden aneurysm*
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *real Mort bursts in through the door with a sack of oranges tied to his chest*... EVERYBODY STAND BACK!! I'LL DO IT!! *threateningly takes out an orange*
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Real_Mort attacks civilians with oranges!*


*Real_Mort rolls 2d8+67!*
*Real_Mort rolls 2d645+36x104!*
*Real_Mort checks die for apparent defections!*
*Real_Mort realizes the die is actually a TURNIP!*
*Real_Mort stores the TURNIP in his turnip sack!*
2010-04-27 [Pillowthief]: *Real_Mort's turnip sack explodes! [checksum 144: Error, thought it was an orange] [Syntax error: orange-turnips do not go in turnip bag]*


C:\
2010-04-27 [Pillowthief]: George Clooney isn't done!


**Clooneyisawesoome14 joins Chat Bobs Diner**
**Pillowthief joins Chat Bobs Diner**
**Real_Mort joins Chat Bobs Diner**
**Clooneyisawesoome14 changes their name to FantasticMrFox**
*FantasticMrFox begins to chew on Real_Mort!*
**Pillowthief changes their name to IHarpwnNoobs**
*Runcommand Kline FantasticMrFox*


Input command:
C:\ChuckNorris2.0


**FantasticMrFox was booted from server - Kline command by IHarpwnNoobs [Roundhouse Kick To Face]**
2010-04-27 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko walks in and shoots everyone using the chat site for chatting*


This is a diner damn it!


*Goes outside and sees the "NOW WITH LIVE CHAT ONLINE" sign glowing in the window*


Aw, shit, not again...
2010-04-27 [Devil in Me]: YOu People Are Very Entertaining you shoould have your own show.
2010-04-27 [twitchboy]: <.< >.>
**Twitchy pulls plug on the giant internet moden in the center of the world terminating all access**
Silly noobs chat severs are for cyber
2010-04-27 [Nekko fox]: *Cudgels Twitchboy with the broken oven. He then goes back to drawing his own porn and selling it to hookers.*
2010-04-27 [Sunrose]: I'm an aries, not a goat ;P
2010-04-27 [Teufelsweib]: they're both hairy and both have horns, goat 'nuff!
2010-04-27 [Sunrose]: Hah :P
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats orange-turnip*...
2010-04-27 [Ninja Smurf]: Who mentioned goats? Sheesh.. stay on topic! *slaps Mort with turnip shaped ramen*
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: TUUUUUUUUUNNNAAAAAAA!! *stabs [Ninja Smurf] with a trout*


...*starts dying from turnip wounds*... tell my wife... that I... hid the money... ha... ha ha... *dies*...


...*comes back to life*... oh... and tell my son... I said... hello... *dies again*...
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's Attorney bursts in through the air conditioning vent*


"I have the will right here. Ahem."


"'In the likely event of my turnip related demise, I want to leave Bob's Diner (as well as its debts and obligations) to Ricky, the comatose retard living in the freezer. As for my ramen pile, I wish for it to be lit on fire and launched at a neighboring village. Preferably the stupid little town across the street where all those stupid orphans live. Especially Tiny Tim. I want him to burn. As for my millions of dollars, I wish to leave that all to my beloved attorney. He is a great attorney. If you are in need of law related services, you can call him anytime at (241)555-325-6323-5251-662-LAW. He also has a huge penis, ladies. And finally, in regards to my bacon bit collection, I leave those to [Pillowthief], because last time I died and gave away all my stuff, he traded for bacon bits.'"
2010-04-27 [twitchboy]: *Blasts the attorney in the face with a musket*
There now no one will have heard him say that.
*steals the ramen stash and jumps into the back of the nearest pickup on its way to mexico*
The ramens mine! ALL MINE!
2010-04-27 [Pillowthief]: Score. All his bacon are belong to me.
2010-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*the cyborg/zombie attorney gets up and puts his head back on*... "Fool! I have the power... of attorney! The prophecy must be fulfilled!!" ...*he catches the truck and uses his attorney flamethrower powers to light it on fire and his super attorney strength to hurl the truck and its contents into the nearby orphanage*...
2010-04-28 [twitchboy]: *emerges from the flames unscratched*
Fool i am protected by the blessings of Scientology! Now eat flaming orphan!
*hurls enflamed orphans at the zombie attorny*
You cant do anyting to my orphan launcher! Thay are protected by the state! Mwuhahahaha
2010-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: You guys are insane, but I love you all, except that flaming orphan, he stole my keys. *shoots said orphan in head*
2010-04-28 [Nekko fox]: HOLY SCIENTOLOGY BATMAN! THAT BITCH IS SHOOTING ORPHANS!


*Batman promptly batarangs Misty in the face which promptly explodes like a struck melon*
2010-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Screw you Batman! *stabs Batman repeatedly with a pocket knife*
2010-04-28 [Pillowthief]: Calmly reminds Misty that she cant say, "Screw you Batman!", as her head got bataranged and exploded.


The stabbing thing, well, we have enough zombies around here to make that feasible.


Who gave the zombie a pocket knife? Those go in the knife pile! Over there, right past the spork pile and the burnt remainder of our fork pile. (dont ask about the spoons! I own them, they're mine!)
2010-04-28 [Sunrose]: Too much text to read :p
2010-04-28 [Nekko fox]: tl;dr: Misty's head exploded. It needs to put the knife in the knife pile. Zombies. Chernobyl.
2010-04-28 [Devil in Me]: LOL Get this guys My Friend Holly and I Took My counsin Michael's truck to the gas station yesterday and as she was backing out she hit the mirror on a stop sign and broke off the plastic part on it!! it was hilarious!!
2010-04-28 [Nekko fox]: Ha! The misfortune of others fills me with spiteful glee!
2010-04-28 [Pillowthief]: Im not quite too sure if that was pertinent to our Chernobyl discussion.


the Misuse Of capital Letters was Interesting, although it brings to question what a stop sign was doing in the middle of a gas station and why you would drive around in a plastic car.
2010-04-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait. So... she hit the mirror on a stop sign?


Why would a stop sign have a mirror? ...what possible function could a mirror on a stop sign serve? ...stupid vain road construction workers...
2010-04-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol I know, they are quite annoying.
2010-04-28 [Teufelsweib]: and why was she driving next to a stop sign, when they clearly order you to stop?
2010-04-29 [Pillowthief]: Exactly. And going backwards too.
I personally dont let my 11 yr old friends drive me around in plastic cars, but if I did, Im pretty sure I wouldn't let them hit the mirror of a stop sign in reverse, especially when its in the middle of a gas station.


What if the poly-carbon struck sparks? Whoosh, no more plastic car and you would be dead, and we would ridicule you even more.
2010-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Seriously. And why were you at a gas station in the first place? Plastic cars usually run on batteries, not gas. Unless you were just there to pick up condoms, booze, and smokes. Which is a very weird thing to pick up when you're being driven around by an 11-year-old.


Then again, your friend was probably already drunk or high on something. You would have to be to reverse a plastic car into a stop sign's mirror in the middle of a gas station.
2010-04-29 [Nekko fox]: This is the most curious of conversations I've seen in a long while.
2010-04-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: Riiight... *eats pocky*
2010-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Boy, what did I tell you several years ago about eating pocky in here?! ...*smacks Misty*...


No Asian food!!


*glances around*


...*eats ramen*...
2010-04-29 [Devil in Me]: NOOO! We we leaving from my house and i live on the corner of a four way so as you back out from in front of the house there is a stop sign. she backed into it and tore the mirror off the truck. Anyway you guys just made it not funny.
2010-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: You live in a gas station?


So she backed into a stop sign. Why did she have to tear the mirror off? Was she mad at that mirror?
2010-04-29 [Teufelsweib]: well, in a way I can understand it. mirrors can be pretty nasty, damn bastards.
2010-04-29 [Pillowthief]: I agree with Mort, but I can see the convenience of living at a gas station.


Probably why the 11yr old was wasted though- I've seen enough of Clerks to know that drug dealers hang out all the time there. Thats probably a bad situation for them.


And I agree with Devil- its not funny. Its real serious. Like, Cambodia serious.
2010-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Those drug dealers can be pretty dangerous. Especially the silent ones.


Why are you letting your 11yr old friend buy drugs anyway? You must be a terrible friend.
2010-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: All that heroine must have made her delusional and angry, which is probably why she tore the mirror off after backing into the stop sign.
2010-05-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why do you guys assume that her friend is eleven years old?
2010-05-01 [Nekko fox]: Hey, quit trying to change the subject of eleven year olds, who are angry and delusional, buying heroine from Cambodia! But, it's nice to see you are taking steps to be a worthwhile member of society.
2010-05-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-02 [Pillowthief]: Who else would drive around a plastic car? Sheesh, pay attention to the story.
2010-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: She didn't say it was a plastic car, she said it was her cousin's car.
2010-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, and her cousin is 11. Therefore it's a plastic car.


Also, she broke the plastic off of it apparently. So... without the plastic, I'm not sure what she's even driving, since the whole thing is usually plastic... hmm... *eats ramen*...
2010-05-03 [Nekko fox]: Well, OBVIOUSLY, since she broke the plastic off her plastic car, it is now just a car. Or wheels. Or maybe it's just....THE RAPE TRAIN!
2010-05-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-05 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-05-05 [Pillowthief]: Did you hear? Spy and Pyro ended up getting married and had a kid.


Fuckers called it 'Spyro'.




I hate stupid purple dragons.


Except for Puff, he was cool.
2010-05-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Smaug is an alright guy. I think he was just a bit misunderstood.
2010-05-05 [Devil in Me]: My Cousin is 22 my friend is 21 and i am 19 and it wasn't a plastic car or the Rape Train, only the part covering the mirror was plastic. And my cousin wasn't on drugs he was drunk!! But what ever have fun riding you rape train, Nekkko,make sure to hit Mort and Pillowtheif. Thanks for trying to help Amebara. =D
2010-05-05 [Nekko fox]: Misty can't help, she's too busy trying to squander the monetary earnings we've gained at the diner through insider trading and drug deals, drugs which she sold to your eleven year old alcoholic/druggie cousin driving her plastic rape train. You know, the one pretending to be twice her age. Where DO kids get those fake IDs these days?
2010-05-05 [Flisky]: On Ebay.
2010-05-05 [Pillowthief]: And this is why my parents never let me on the internet when I was young.


Either that or it wasn't created yet. Crap. I feel old.


"I created the internetz!"
"We dont want no fuzzy mathomatics..."
2010-05-05 [Devil in Me]: ebay really i need one how do i find it?
2010-05-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I remember when the only thing a computer was good for was Solitaire... and rat crushing...


Laptops just can't crush rats like they used to.
2010-05-05 [Pillowthief]: Flys and cockroaches are still pretty squishible.
Rats, you just end up pissing off. Trust me, you definitely dont want to face a pissed off rat, especially with your hands empty.
2010-05-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That's why I always carry around TWO laptops. In case the need for dual rat crushing action arises. Which it often does.
2010-05-05 [Teufelsweib]: and what in case of bigger, angry rodents? say... beavers?
2010-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: ATM machines make fine beaver crushers.
2010-05-06 [Pillowthief]: I prefer the mini-fridge myself, as it gives excellent access to cold storage after the giant rat/beaver/small dog is crushed.


Besides, most of my money I have to clean once already, I dont really feel like cleaning it again.
2010-05-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: Your welcome [Devil in Me], and I do not sell drugs, and that's an awful way to use a laptop.
2010-05-09 [Teufelsweib]: what else could you use a laptop for?
2010-05-09 [Flisky]: A dinner tray.
2010-05-09 [Teufelsweib]: you already have dinner trays for that!
2010-05-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: You can use them the normal way... Oh wait, I forgot you guys aren't normal.
2010-05-09 [Teufelsweib]: 'normal' is relative. what's normal to you doesn't mean it's normal for other people. other people might find it perfectly normal to use laptops to smash rats with, and since they function well with either use (to computer with and to kill rodents with) what is really the 'normal' use of a laptop?
2010-05-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: What happens when you break said laptop while trying to kill a rat?
2010-05-09 [Ninja Smurf]: Then obviously the laptop you were using wasn't strong enough so you need to get a better one.
2010-05-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah, I see.
2010-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: That's why you always ask the guy at Best Buy how many ratsworth the computer is (a unit of measurement developed to determine how many rats you can crush before breaking. It was originally used in the 1800's in reference to brooms, muskets, and jetpacks). I only buy laptops that are at least 100 ratsworth or higher.


I hear Japan is developing a laptop made of a combination of unobtainium and adamantium that gets up to 350 ratsworth.
2010-05-10 [Xeroh Kanoe]: ...I want an Alienware laptop... *drools a little*
2010-05-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-10 [Mortified Penguin]: That has nothing to do with rat cru- *something random and hilarious happens in the kitchen, but nobody sees it* -shing! ...*eats ramen*...
2010-05-10 [one more lonely girl]: well i often use laptops for the annoying birds outside my window.
2010-05-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Nice.
2010-05-11 [Nekko fox]: I found that after I taught my spearow how to fly.


  

2010-05-11 [the wonderfall-man]: *shoots the bird and watches the guy fall*
2010-05-12 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: Aw, poor little Electrode.
2010-05-12 [Tekkon KinKreet]: he will return... with a vengeance
2010-05-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Yes, he will.
2010-05-13 [one more lonely girl]: i don't understand!!
2010-05-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Perhaps my FIST can teach you! *kicks [one more lonely girl] in the stomach*
2010-05-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's not your fist Mort! *smacks Mort upside the head* BAKA! What exactly don't you understand [one more lonely girl]?
2010-05-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll show you! ...Karate kick!! *punches misty in the back of the head*
2010-05-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: electrode is going to *poof* and blow us all up.... be watchful, be very very watchful... i want to use him to play golf... FOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRREEEEEEE
2010-05-14 [one more lonely girl]: What the hell is an Electrode?
2010-05-14 [Araglas]: lol a pokemon! Gotta cacth em all! POKEMON!!
2010-05-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, Pokemon first came out in the 90s, I can't remember the exact year the show came out in America though.
2010-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in with the Burger King King's head*... *mounts it on the wall next to Ronald's*... *marks the name off a list*...


Let's see... ah, yes... Wendy's girl. ...*gets an assault rifle off the wall*... *starts walking in [Pillowthief]'s direction*...
2010-05-15 [Nekko fox]: Fool, they killed eachother! You had no part in the matter.


  

2010-05-15 [Nekko fox]: And to [one more lonely girl], I got this for you.








http://lmgtfy.com/?q=Electrode+Pokemon
2010-05-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why'd you post it twice?
2010-05-16 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Drop that bacon burger and hand over the fries and the Thundercats shirt!! *shoots Misty in the face, so you know I'm serious*
2010-05-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's the strangest pic.
2010-05-16 [Sunrose]: It's a very old one to say the least :P
2010-05-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah.
2010-05-16 [Pillowthief]: Year and a half.


*Dips fries in Misty's blood, but thinks better of it before eating*


Wait, does Wendy's even have fries?


*Dips imaginary fries in Misty's blood, figuring its safer this way anyways*
2010-05-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-16 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-05-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-16 [Pillowthief]: Im not sure what to even comment after that. Somehow I missed the referents.
2010-05-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: go deadpool!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2010-05-18 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-05-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-18 [Araglas]: uuuuuhhhhhhhhh
2010-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *uses Cap's shield as a cereal bowl*... *uses Thor's hammer as a meat tenderizer/Misty smasher*...
2010-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Shut up!! *smacks Araglas*
2010-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*deals cards at the Blackjack table*...
2010-05-19 [Nekko fox]:   



He wants his hammer back mort..He needs to finish his job on that loser below...


  

2010-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, most of us are Scientologists here, so I don't guess that's too offensive...
2010-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *administers auditing session to Tiny Tim*... Holy crap! This kid's Thetan level is over 9,000!!
2010-05-19 [Araglas]: *brings in a needle and vial of black liquid* Here is the shot Doctor Mort..
2010-05-20 [Lily~]: wtf? What randomness... Havent been here in a while... I have to say that using my phone, i cant read a bloody thing on the pictures. :) i think they look offensive but i dont really care cause i am pagan :)
2010-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I TOLD you to bring me a vial of GREEN liquid!! *stabs Araglas with the needle*
2010-05-20 [Araglas]: *cries and goes back and gets green vial and hands it to Mort* S...s-s-sorry sir....
2010-05-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: nothing like random violence after a couple hours of controlled violence. ^^
2010-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: What is this crap?! Where are those pictures of Spiderman I told you to get?!?!!! *stabs Araglas with a camera*
2010-05-21 [Lily~]: nothing like being ignored by the rest of the population here either! No wonder its so dead!
2010-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Your MOM is so dead.
2010-05-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mortified Penguin, my dear sweet Mortified Penguin, you need a new kidney or you'll die.
2010-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry, I got three extras. I keep them stored behind my lungs with my emergency wine bottles...
2010-05-21 [Pillowthief]: Hero, your health is low. Do you have any potions or food?


Sorry Mort, you only have two kidneys left and the 1932 vintage is probably the best of your stock. Thankfully you succumb to chloroform, otherwise it'd be a bitch to drink anything worthwhile on the weekends.




(And what was that a reference to Nekko? I was talking Captain America and you totally threw me off with two chicks in a shower. Not cool.)


2010-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Get your hands off my Château de Bob (made from the juices of the finest crushed rats available and goat milk. Which, in hindsight, was not a very wise ingredient choice, since apparently milk spoils)!
2010-05-21 [Araglas]: *cries and brings mort pictures of spiderman*
2010-05-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: Aw, poor Araglas. *huggles*
2010-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Stabs*
2010-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *That is all*
2010-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Quit reading my messages*
2010-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Stop it*
2010-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Stalker trash...*
2010-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Ponders his previous comments, then posts a picture*


  

2010-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I am NOT a stalker! *slams binoculars down on the table angrily*


Screw this! I'm going to my tree! *climbs the large tree coincidentally by Nok's bedroom window*
2010-05-22 [Pillowthief]: *Hands Mort the binoculars*


Nothing much been happening in the last half an hour. Your shift, Im going to take a break.
2010-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll let you know of any developments.


*does binocular related things*


Man, this tree is uncomfortable...
2010-05-23 [LIL_ELF_GURL14]: ;O Elf on the cob ..thats just racist
2010-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I am NOT a racist! *slams burning cross on the table angrily*


Screw this! I'm going back to my ghost meeting! *puts on a white cloak and white pointy hat*
2010-05-23 [Pillowthief]: *Hands Mort the Scepter of Power*


Nothing much been happening in the last half an hour.


*Goes back to burning squirrels*
2010-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll let you know of any developments.


*does Scepter of Power related things*


Man, these cloaks are uncomfortable...
2010-05-23 [Pillowthief]: I know, they really should think about makin- Oomph!!


  

2010-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I told you to stay in the tree, where it's out of range!
2010-05-23 [twitchboy]: makes you wonder how they hide the bulge
2010-05-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_O Wow...
2010-05-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: flcl?
2010-05-24 [twitchboy]: Wish my girlfriend had a spring loaded vagina
2010-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: It's better than a pussy troll, like my girlfriend has... stupid Pillow Pants... *eats ramen*...
2010-05-24 [Pillowthief]: Indeed, nice catch Tekkon- FLCL.


And Twitchboy- Why the hell would you want a cyborg girlfriend with a spring loaded vagina? I know some people think its cool to have sex with robots (I've seen them on the streets proclaiming 'Free Robot Sex!'!!), but Im quite sure you should try getting a real girlfriend first, one of the human kind.


That way you dont have to worry about black eyes and only about ass to mouth.
2010-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I got the FLCL manga for free (stole it)... it's very confusing. And confusing things make me mad!! *turns big and green*... *punches misty*... *sells green beans to children*...


  



MWAHAHAA!! Eat your vegetables!!! *throws apples at misty*


(You never go ass to mouth!)
2010-05-24 [Pillowthief]: In the heat of the moment, sometimes its forgivable to go ass to mouth.


*A giant robot sprouts from [Pillowthief]'s head and starts whaling on a guitar. Millions rise up to start a new religion called 'Your mother doesnt actually suck cock in hell, she's over on 4th St'. It, however, was short lived as a giant alien clothes iron flattened the newly erected church and most of it's followers (it was a big church) during a charity BBQ. Meanwhile, somewhere else, a middle-school japanese kid gets molested by both a high-school student and a crazy 20yr old alien chick* 
2010-05-25 [twitchboy]: hay i has girlfriend! and she is human(i think does a retarted clone of megan fox count? she didnt come out of the test tube quite right)
Fuck that real fans know you can only kick ass on a bass!*pulls bass form belly button and whomps pillows forehead mech**A tenticle monster joins in in japan*
2010-05-25 [jaraden]: finally, a place to eat!!! i've been freaking starving!! hunted everything in my neck of the woods into extingtion i've been so hungry... so... where do i order.. har har!
2010-05-25 [Pillowthief]: Right...*aims*...Here.


*Boomerang-a-rangs a uniquely shaped dictionary catching both [twitchboy] and [jaraden] squarely in the face before returning to the hand that skillfully threw it*
2010-05-25 [Pillowthief]: *Stuffs dictionary back into his empty head*
2010-05-26 [twitchboy]: *distionary passes right through my head*
I cant be effected by wordy books! My illiteracy grants immunity! Mwuhahahaha
2010-05-26 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up at twitchboy's comments, then promptly lets his head drop in pity for the English language*
2010-05-26 [jaraden]: i've never claimed to be any good at engulemishness.. and i'm crap at slepelmagiging... but i'm so freaking hungry i'll have that dictionumarium back for dinna!!! yar!
2010-05-26 [Nekko fox]: And then the PIRATES ATTACKED......


*He waits patiently but all the pirates are drunk outside, unconscious*
2010-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals all their booze and loot*
2010-05-26 [Pillowthief]: *Steals a pirate outfit in order to infiltrate the mob boss' house next door. After killing two body guards, a cook, and a housemaid, leaves inconspicuously out the back dressed as the milkman*


Guess the mob boss wasn't home. *shrug*
2010-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: MY HOUSE!! ...the mob boss lives on the OTHER side of the diner!! ...*weeps over Lucinda's dead body*... now who will clean my stains?!
2010-05-27 [Pillowthief]: MR CLEAN FOO!


LESS NOISE SUCKA! YOU AIN'T GETTIN ME ON NO AIRPLANE!
WHERE"S THE FOO FIGHTERS AND WHY AREN'T THEY OUT THERE FIGHTING SOME FOOS?
2010-05-27 [Nekko fox]: And that's what she said.
2010-05-27 [Nekko fox]: By she I mean Lucinda.
2010-05-27 [Nekko fox]: She said it.
2010-05-27 [Nekko fox]: Before she died.
2010-05-27 [Mortified Penguin]: He's Dr. Clean now. Apparently he was unsatisfied with cleaning houses his whole life.


*the Foo Fighters burst in and start savagely beating Misty with their guitars* "IT'S REAL, THE PAIN YOU FEEL!"


Oh, hey guys! Do you like the food here?


"Of course! It's THE BEST! THE BEST! THE BEST! THE BEST!"
2010-05-27 [jaraden]: being one of the drunken pirates outside i feel i must protest.. not strongly though as i am too hung over! but seeing as there is some vacant rooms come available in that house hows about puttin me up fer the night?? that is, after i find my cloths, money and... hey! who took my stuff!!! me gun n blades are gone.. bastards, can't a lowly pirate fall drunkenly unconcious in the streets anymore?? the humanity!! barkeep! pour me a double!!
2010-05-27 [Nekko fox]: *Pours the drunken pirate a double in a dirty tumbler. The double consists of two shots of old milk which expired in a date that was written out in Roman Numerals.*
2010-05-27 [Pillowthief]: *Gwar bust through the side wall (as the door itself was too small for their large fan-eating-Dune-like Worm that accompanies them) unfortunately trampling several hungover pirates in the process. After a few minutes of milling around, they actually realize that they like the Foo Fighters and decide not to feed them to their Worm. Not knowing what to do now, they spontaneously start playing music*


*The band begins playing 'Sex Cow'*
2010-05-27 [twitchboy]: *cleverly disguised as the drunk pirates sober monkey*
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: *Gwar, being bored with playing Sex Cow, switch to Sadam-a-GoGo and feeds the drunk pirates sober monkey (who they believe was making faces at them) to the large fan-eating-Dune-like Worm*
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *there is much cheering among the single patron who later dies of massive indigestion*
2010-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in, eating a fan-eating-Dune-like Worm burger with bacon*... hmm... well, this is awkward...
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: *Gwar's large fan-eating-Dune-like Worm roars in anger that can only be translated as "You're dining on my late mother's sister. I must avenge her. I will disembowel your dog."*
2010-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... uh huh... *nods at the roaring*... If I had known you were here, I would have picked you one up too, man... I guess you can have half of mine if you want... *tries to feed the burger to the fan-eating-Dune-like Worm*... *munches on fries that are actually fan-eating-Dune-like Worm babies*...
2010-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why would the Foo Fighters beat me up and ignore the restraining order?
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Because they pity the foo's.
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: O_O What'd he kill, a fairy?
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]: If you remember Navi from the other LOZ games you would understand his rage.
2010-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: I've only played the original.
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Cudgels Misty with Link*


That's for not keeping with the series!
2010-05-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sorry, I only have a Gameboy advance SP and a computer.
2010-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! LISTEN!


It wasn't as bad as that stupid owl who wouldn't shut up.
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Jesus Christ...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...the owl...
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: AHH! Ocarina of Time nightmares!


That and the prissy bitch of a water princess that you had to carry everywhere- Mort and me have already had a talk about her.


You set her down for a moment and turn your back for just a sec- and she's clear back where you originally found her.
2010-05-28 [Nekko fox]: That haughty little strumpet.
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: That brings back memories...


No button mashing with that owl either- He had that trick little thing he would do when he showed up. Once he was done with his long-winded spiel on annoying tutorials, he would ask you, 'Do you want to hear that again?' and you needed to physically move the cursor down before hitting A or he would go through the whole thing all over again, word for word.


He was always out of reach too and would fly off so you never got the chance to kill him. Fucker.
2010-05-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Seriously!


The worst part was when the monkey started throwing the barrels and you had to jump over them and stuff.
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: I always used the Hammer. Right-Right-Left-Up-Right-Down to execute the Divide By Subzero move.


K.O.
2010-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Then when you're playing as Scorpion you can press Right-Left-Left-A-Triangle-Right-Batman symbol-Reset button-Diagonal arrow and...


HADOKEN!
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: Rock, Paper....


Spock.
  



I win.


2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]:
Finish Him!
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-05-28 [jaraden]: that would be an awesome finishing move for mortal combat... SPOCKED!!!
2010-05-28 [Pillowthief]: But it wasn't in the combo list. That's why I used the Donkey Punch. Kinda looks like that chick is getting rear-ended as well- I think it has a hilarious factor like '/b/ just accidentally all over your face'.
2010-05-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol You are insane.
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: /b/ hates you.
2010-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: It's true. Granted, they hate pretty much everyone, but still...
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: /b/ agrees.
2010-05-29 [Nekko fox]: /b/ knows all.
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: /b/ is everywhere.
2010-05-29 [Nekko fox]: /b/ is in your mom.
2010-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody likes /b/. Everyone knows /x/ is the party board.
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: Fuck /x/. /b/ does not like /x/.
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: On a different note- /b/ likes your mom.
2010-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: And my little sister apparently.
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: /b/ likes you.


Yes. In that way.
[]
Other than that way, /b/ hates you.
2010-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Fine then! I'll just move to /co/... *packs up my things*...
2010-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts moving to /co/, but gets distracted by /d/*
2010-05-29 [Pillowthief]: You can not find /b/. /b/ is anon.
2010-05-30 [Flisky]: /b/ is anon. And femanon. At the same time.
2010-05-30 [Nekko fox]: *Hits flisk_girl with tubes full of internet*


Silly, Femanon is a myth, there are no girls on the internet. Just men wanting to be women and children who are FBI agents.
2010-05-30 [Flisky]: Stop hitting me with interwebbing. *cries because she is a child and an FBI agent with a blown cover*
2010-05-30 [Nekko fox]: *Glorifies her with rule thirty four*
2010-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: HANSON!! ...*leaps out the window*...
2010-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: We're at an average of 8.7389705882352941176470588235294 comments a day, you jerks! Make more comments!! *smacks Misty, because this is obviously her fault*
2010-05-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey! Rules 1 and- aw, screw it... *eats Mort's ramen*...
2010-05-30 [Pillowthief]: /b/ has already eaten all of Mort's ramen.
2010-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*looks in ramen cup*... what?! When did this happen?!!


Well, good thing I have Ramen Insurance... *calls State Farm*...
2010-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what do you mean I'm not covered?! ...what do you mean 'act of God'?! ...how can /b/ be considered an act of God?!?! ...no, you need calm down!!! ...no, YOU have a good day!! ...don't you take that dial tone with ME!!!
2010-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *slams the phone into misty's face*
2010-05-30 [Flisky]: See, that's why you need Progressive. *nods*
2010-05-30 [Pillowthief]: Your FACE is Progressive! *slams phone into Misty's face*
2010-06-01 [Pillowthief]: Hey Misty, I heard you were interesting.


*slams an [ /b/ has stolen the item, 'Interesting Phone' ] in Misty's face!*
2010-06-01 [Nekko fox]: Goddamn it /b/!


*Slams a PS3 into Misty's face. No one cares because the system doesn't have any good games anyway*
2010-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: God of War! Metal Gear Solid! Bob's Diner: The Game!
2010-06-01 [Nekko fox]: *Repeat: Doesn't have any good games anyway. Slams Bob's Diner: The Game! Into Misty's face*
2010-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *the toxins from the cheap game melt Misty's face*
2010-06-01 [Pillowthief]: What was left of it...
2010-06-02 [Nekko fox]: And then there was rejoicing.
2010-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *grimaces at the melted, horrifyingly disfigured face*... well, I suppose it's a bit of an improvement at least. Without that other eyebrow, you don't have to worry about that pesky unibrow anymore!
2010-06-02 [Pillowthief]: */b/ rejoices*
2010-06-02 [Pillowthief]: */b/ buys other eyebrow from Ebay*
2010-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Everyone starts Singing "Jesus Loves Me", but everyone nearby is either dead, violently ill, a splattered zombie, batshit insane, Misty, or a drunk and incoherent pirate. They harmonize beautifully*
2010-06-03 [Pillowthief]: *Barney, the giant purple dinosaur, kicks down the door and starts eating people! Several people are trampled in the process, but afterwords the patrons were pronounced as dead pre-dinosaur stomping- the rest were discovered as zombies and so don't really count. Misty, ironically, wasn't touched, but as speculative experts discussed, the reason being is more likely that she didn't look very edible at the time*
2010-06-04 [Nekko fox]: *Of course, there was never any 'speculation' on the matter. It was blatantly obvious. The news anchors that aired a picture of her were fired and they were subsequently lynched by angry mobs. The station itself was burnt to the ground using petrol bombs*
2010-06-04 [Pillowthief]: And flaming waffle irons. In the meantime...


  

2010-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *plays blue version instead*... dang it, Bulbasaur! Eat your rare candies and stop vomiting!! *kicks bulbasaur*
2010-06-04 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: haha this wiki is awesome ! ^^
2010-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Darn straight! *smacks Misty upside the head*... *punches [~*~Music Junkie~*~] in the shins*... now shut up and order. We desperately need the money, to fix that hole in the wall... *points at a massive, gaping hole where all sort of wildlife wander in*... it's the only wall we have left. We have to treat it well.
2010-06-05 [Ninja Smurf]: When the hell did we get walls here?
2010-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: They're made out of corpses, cheeseburgers, and the melted fork pile...
2010-06-05 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: Well, you would have better luck with up keep if you stopped throwing your customers through the walls and playing lawn dart's in doors!


I'll have some punkin pie, and morti's head on a fake silver platter, and make it snappy or no tip!
2010-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *scoops up some of the food pile from the corner*... *puts snapping turtles, (used) rat traps, and crabs on top of it, to make it snappy*... here's those tacos you ordered... *violently kicks the serving tray out the window*... RRRAAAAAAAHHHH! *rips off shirt*


*crawls back under the managerial desk to play some Dungeons and Dragons alone*... Stupid imps! Stop re-spawning!
2010-06-05 [Ninja Smurf]: *notices that the managerial desk is actually the rusted out, moldy urinal, with strange creatures growing out of it*
2010-06-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: Guys who play Dungeons and Dragons were on the 'Undateable' list.
2010-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: For you? ...sweet! ...*plays more D&D*...
2010-06-06 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: D&D IS EPIC! it's been years since ive played hahaha aaww man!!!
2010-06-06 [twitchboy]: a word to the wise music...lose all sense of shame and common sense.. then you will be right a home here
2010-06-06 [Ninja Smurf]: Morals are optional here at Bob's!
2010-06-06 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: I have no shame nor common sence twitch!!! hahaha but thanks for the word of advice =D
2010-06-06 [Pillowthief]: /b/ hates sen'ce. Or sensi. Or sensei.


/b/ has no sensei. /b/ is all knowing.


/b/ hates you.




*plays B&D*
Yes! 4d-2 damage to Misty's face!
2010-06-07 [Nekko fox]: *Trumpets sound and the farmers rejoice that the monster was slain*
2010-06-07 [Pillowthief]: I want to cast magic missile...
2010-06-07 [Pillowthief]: *[Pillowthief] casts Magic Missile at Enemy: the Darkness*
2010-06-08 [Flisky]: Fine, fine, you attack the darkness. There’s an elf in front of you.
2010-06-08 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: OH SHIT!!!!!!! Not one of the rainbow, tapdancing elf's from Mexico?!!!!!!!!
2010-06-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol I've never seen a tap dancing elf from Mexico.
2010-06-08 [Nekko fox]: You both ruined the skit, shame on you.
2010-06-08 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: Really? there fairly common, tricky little buggers, <.<
2010-06-08 [Pillowthief]: Shut UP! They can't hear you, you're in the tavern getting DRUNK!
2010-06-08 [Flisky]: OK, but if there's any girls there, I wanna DO them!
2010-06-08 [Nekko fox]: Where's the Mountain Dew?
2010-06-08 [Flisky]: In the fridge, duh!
2010-06-08 [Pillowthief]: *sigh*
You are being attacked. There are seven ogres surrounding you.
2010-06-08 [Flisky]: How could they surround us? I had Mordenkainen's Magical Watchdog cast.
2010-06-08 [Pillowthief]: No you didn't.
2010-06-08 [Flisky]: I totally did! You asked me if I wanted any equipment before this adventure and I said No. But I need material components for all my spells. So I cast Mordenkainen's Faithful Watchdog.
2010-06-09 [Pillowthief]: No you didn't- you didn't actually SAY that you were casting the spell, so now there's ogres, OK?
2010-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I pull out my Ak-47 and cast bullets into the ogres' skulls.


*rolls dice*


-17?! ...well, I am defeated then... *eats ramen*... *is destroyed by ogres*...
2010-06-09 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, that's weird. Throwing bullets at ogres while holding a AK-47 usually works. Maybe you should have held the bullets and cast Ak-47?
2010-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe I should have combined them for maximum effectiveness...? But everyone knows Ak-47 combinations take an extra turn before going into effect. And by then, the ogres would have already jumped me and got a king. Unless they were pawns. Then they could have gotten a queen.


There's nothing worse than ogre queens running around... singing Cher and being flamboyant... and th- HOLY CRAP! THERE'S ONE! *points at misty*
2010-06-09 [Pillowthief]: *Misty casts Sing Cher*


*Bob's Diner takes 46 damage!*
2010-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not an ogre, I'm a penguin lover.
2010-06-09 [Araglas]: *flounces in dressed like an penguin* Argh!


*casts frozen penguin fish*




*pillowthief takes 99 damage*
2010-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it, people! This is NOT how you play poker!! *throws the chess board to the floor*... and I was only three cards away from Yahtzee... jerks... *eats ramen in the freezer with Bob's corpse*...
2010-06-09 [Pillowthief]: Not the Prinnies!!! Noooo!!!!
  





By the way, the final, final, final, final-final boss is a prinny at lvl 6400, something like that. Kicked my fucking ass.
2010-06-09 [Pillowthief]: Ah, but you forgot about the Mouse Trap. That's where you lost.
2010-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Prinnies can't get that high a level! Unless you feed them nothing but rare candies.
2010-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol *huggles Penguin Araglas*
2010-06-09 [Pillowthief]: Use your Prinny Bomb! Quickly!




I thought so too, but somehow this prinny was sucking on the mother of all rare candies. Wiped my whole party in less than 4 moves. (Disgaea)
2010-06-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's awful.
2010-06-10 [Pillowthief]: But useful. You can be 3 squares away and still throw explosives at slobbering enemies/Power Ranger Want-a-bes/Misty.
2010-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hey, i'm not a want-a-be.
2010-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Or a Power Ranger, thank God. They wear spandex. *shudders*


...*walks around on peg legs*...
2010-06-10 [Pillowthief]:
  



*casually notices that Misty distanced herself from want-a-bes, but not slobbering enemies*
2010-06-10 Mortifried Ponguin: I'm not slobbering! It's more like drooling actually...
2010-06-10 [Flisky]: *for a moment has the vision of Mort in spandex, vomits, dies, is resurrected as per the prophecy, continues on her way*
2010-06-10 [Glitch Sprockyt]: G'morning. Uh, nobody.
2010-06-11 [Nekko fox]: Damned right nobody!
2010-06-12 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Mleh.
2010-06-13 [Pillowthief]: Blarg!
2010-06-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *beats Pillowthief to death with a skillet*


Sorry. I thought you were a moth.
2010-06-14 [Nekko fox]: Moths?! I HATE MOTHS!


*Fumigates the restaurant/diner with all the customers and food still inside*
2010-06-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs as I sit on the roof of a building nearby*
2010-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *Fumigates Misty*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   



"GET OVER HERE!" *Scorpion spears Misty and flings her into the diner, where she is promptly fumigated in the face*
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in through the floor*... RAINBOW MAN here!


RAAAAAIIIIINNBOOOOOOOOWWWWW...... ACTIIIOOOOOOOOONNN!!! *stabs misty with a knife*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Great Scott! That's not how you stab misty! *pulls out massive chainsaw and drives it through misty's corpse*... That's how you stab her! RAGE BOY away! *bursts into flames while crashing into an orphanage*
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: No, Violent Retard Boy Rage Boy! You're killing those orphans!! Don't you know how much we could get for them on the black market?! *gathers up orphans in a large sack*... to the black market! *flies to Pillowthief's house*... *violently kicks in his door and takes his cash*... *leaves the sack of orphans on the doorstep*...
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!! *demolishes nearby buildings* It looks like we've saved the day again, Rainbow Man!


*Tiny Tim crawls out of the wreckage*... Oh, no you don't! *fires concentrated beams of light which denature Tiny Tim's proteins*... Gooooood times...
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ha ha! Good work, Rage Boy! The day is saved. Now let's go buy some hookers with this black market cash. *picks up a couple of hooker corpses from the wreckage*... TO THE RAINBOW CAVE! *steals a Mercedes Benz and drives it over the burning corpses and buildings*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Rage... unfulfilled!!! *rushes into the nearest assisted living location and wrestles elderly citizens to the ground* You think you got what it takes to save the world, gramps?! RAAAAHHH!!!! *snaps the elderly gentleman's neck*... No match! Rainbow Man, help me out with these wrinkled prunes! RAGE CANNON!!!! *fires large waves of gamma radiation, which subsequently melt the people*
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'll be there momentarily, old chum! Let me recharge my Rainbow powers first! *bursts into a nearby hospital* I HUNGER!!!


*patients start fleeing in terror*... *captures the slowest people and forcefully removes their kidneys*... *viciously bites into the kidneys, dripping blood on the sobbing nurse below*... Ah, Kidneys... their deliciousness has recharged my Rainbow Energy! RAINBOW MAN to the RESCUE! *launches massive Rainbow energy waves into the assisted living building*


No more shall you terrorize the earth with your baldness and your wrinkles! *rips an elderly man's spine out*... *twirls it around, knocking other old people to the ground*...
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Good show, old boy! My rage is slowly dwindling, though... must.. be... provoked...


*a bunny appears beside me* ...AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGHH!!!! *dismembers bunny in a grizzly manner*... *harnesses the soul of the bunny*... Mmm, bunny soul! My rage continues!!


I'm tired of your liver spots, old bags! *liquefies elderly people by running an over-sized blender through the nursing home*... Must MUTILATE!!! ...*gets a handy dandy pocket wood-chipper from the nearest pocket*...


*the nursing home has been successfully cleared* ...TO THIRD-WORLD COUNTRIES!!! *zooms off in an aura of rage*...
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: YYYYAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!! *drops Rainbow nukes over Africa* Take THAT, AIDS! *starts shooting Africans with Rainbow beams*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: You're doing it wrong, man! *drops fusion bomb on Russia*... Take that, Medvedev!
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: NOOO! NOT THE RUSKIES!! They were the ones that genetically engineered me with this amazing Rainbow Power! Oh well... RAINBOW BLAST!! *blows up a small village* Where's the gold, old WHORE?!!?! *starts punching an old lady*... *breaks her brittle legs with a large cement block*... oh?! You can't talk because I ripped out your vocal chords?! You don't know anything about the gold I'm talking about?!! LIES!!! *hurls her violently into the sun*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Dear Diary,


Today I was riding my horse through a field, shooting at poes, when all of a sudden Navi starts yelling at me to listen to her. "Dude! You need to get over to the freakin' Forest Temple! They's some crazy sh*t happenin' an' you needs to check it out!"


So I headed towards Kokiri village so I could get to the temple. When I finally got there, I got off Epona and whipped out my bow. I saw a creature running at me, so I shot it repeatedly in the face. It turns out it was just Mido trying to hug me. After a brief funeral, I continued onward. Upon entering the temple, I saw a bat flying around that appeared to be on fire. I thought I would help it out by firing an ice arrow at it. Apparently, ice arrows kill bats, rather than just put out the fire. All of a sudden PETA came out of nowhere and started throwing stuff at me, so I shot a few of them in the face with my hookshot... and then... blah blah with the budget...


...*eats ramen*...
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa, I suddenly turned into Link!
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *little children start screaming* "You killed our babushka! Why are you doing this?!"


Did you just call me a bobcat?!! *rips out one child's intestines and uses them to strangle another child*


Rage Boy/Link! Now is not the time to be writing in your journal! ...There are still evil villains to vanquish! JUSTICE MUST PREVAIL!! *kicks another old woman in the face with his Poison Rainbow Spike Boots*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Right! *pulls out grenade child*... I've successfully implanted a bomb within you, boy! Don't fail me now! *launches child bomb into a crowd of disabled veterans*... For America! *explosions fill the night sky as the ol' red, white, and blue waves in the background*... *the flag slowly catches fire*...


There are more villains afoot! Hark! I hear one now! *girl scout approaches, trying to sell cookies* ...MY COOKIES!!!!! RAGE BOMB!!!!! *a large ensemble of ICBMs obliterate the poor vendor*... *munches on cookies*...


Quickly, to China! *slants eyes and begins to practice Engrish skills*...
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh, herro, Chinese peepur! *fires massive Rainbow Disks into the crowded streets, slicing people in half* FOR AMERICA!! *throws American bomb children into the subways*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Justice has been forsaken in this ching-chong state! GO TO HERR!!!! *pulls out Rage Saw*... *eviscerates Chinese corporates*... *entrails spill all over the ground, fertilizing the seeds of JUSTICE*... AMERICA!!!


*takes out Rage Boomerang*... To Australia!!! ...*rides a kangaroo*...
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hello, kind Aborigine gentleman. How would you like it if I punch you DOWN UNDER?!! *punches him in the crotch*... MWAHAHAA! JUSTICE!!!! RAAAAAIIIIIBOOOOWWW... FIIIIIIISSSSST!!! *launches Rainbow radiation into a cluster of huts, instantly vaporizing them*... this area is cleared. To Sydney! *flies away, leaving a beatiful, yet sinister rainbow behind in the skies*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *villains run amok on the sandy beaches of Sydney*... Trying to escape, huh?! *incinerates a nearby beach-goer*... Take that!


MUST. DESTROY. EVIL!!!!!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE... PISTOL! *pulls out gun and starts shooting at will* ...RAAAAAH!!!!! ...*spots a koala*... EVIL!!!! *administers a lethal dosage of whoop-ass upon the unsuspecting marsupial*...
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: For truth and goodness, I command, from the pits of hell heaven, come forth fire! RAINBOW FIRE! *the sky turns black and rainbow lightning strikes my palm, which bursts into a blazing fire of many colors*... with this fire, I shall forge the blade of ultimate JUSTICE. *places the burning hand in the sand, melting it together into a strong, sharp, glass blade of infinite beauty and power*... *uses the Sword of Rainbows to stab through a screaming hotdog vendor*... NO... MORE... REEEELLLLLLIIIIIISSSSSHHH!!!! *slices off his head*


*fires Rainbow blasts from the sword into the Sydney Opera House*... Die, terrible singing!!
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: For the protection of the world and the propagation of rage, I call upon the spirits of the 23rd dimension! RAGE EMBER!!! *the heavens part, as a dazzling light descends from the cosmos into the palm of my hand*... *the light of a thousand glorious suns radiates from my extremity, blinding those around*... This power will mold the future of humanity and create a Utopian society! *flies into the dark sky and targets Sydney*... RAGE BEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAM!!!!!!


*a gargantuan lightning bolt shoots from the tip of my index finger*... *the beam penetrates many as it rockets its way towards the Australian wasteland*... *on contact, the world is destroyed, ushering in a new era of JUSTICE* RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!
2010-06-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well done, Rage Boy. At last, we can finally res- what's that?! *notices astronauts looking on in horror*


Curse you, evil! You shall not prevail!! ...Destructive Rainbow Wave!!! *claps hands together, sending shimmering blast waves through space, blowing up the International Space Station*


Now we can rest, Rage B- what ho! More villany on the moon! *points at moon rocks*... you won't get away this time, evil doers! *surfs on cosmic rainbow waves in the direction of the moon*
2010-06-15 [Nekko fox]: We need more of this buffoonery and bullshit.
2010-06-15 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: oh...look, zere goes a giant squeeed
2010-06-15 [Teufelsweib]: *flops*
2010-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Get back in the soup!! *kicks the squid into the toilet*
2010-06-15 [~*~Music Junkie~*~]: XD hahaha
2010-06-16 [Nekko fox]: *Goes about stirring the soup, adding a little bit of whatever he can find laying around. Toilet paper, bleach, urine-stained cardboard, zombies parts, Misty...*
2010-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: Eh? Why'd you steal my dog for your soup you freak!
2010-06-16 [Teufelsweib]: you confused Misty for her dog again, Nekko -_-
2010-06-16 [~Crimson Angel~]: *nods* Yep.
2010-06-16 [Lily~]: Note to mort: My mom is actually dead, asshole. She passed away May 3rd this year. Thanks for being a jerk.
2010-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I had to look through several hundred comments to get that reference.


And cool! I guessed right.


Now get back to work... *punches Tiny Tim in the spine*... go stir the soup, boy!!
2010-06-17 [Pillowthief]: Sometimes I wonder if you were raised by wolves.
Then I remember- you were.




Fucking Mogli.


And WTF are these orphans doing in my house?!? Get out of here you scrubs! Where'd my money go? THOSE FUCKING ORPHANS STOLE MY MONEY!! RAGGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!


*Morphs into a giant octopus with lasers for arms!*


GGRRRRAAAAPHHHHHAAAAGGGGGGRRRAAAA!!!!!
2010-06-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: *gasps* MORTIFIED PENGUIN! How can you be so insensitive?!
2010-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, it all started with my early family life. You see, my dad was always a workaholic. Every night, he would come home drunk on workahol and savagely beat my mom. One day, after slapping my mom around, he looked over at me and said, "Why so serious?" He then grabbed a kitchen knife and started walking toward me. He said, "Let's put a smile on the face!" and he raised the knife in the air. He then cut me a big ol' slice of cake and gave it to me. Best birthday ever... *eats ramen*...
2010-06-18 [Glitch Sprockyt]: I'm hungry. Are icecubes expensive?
2010-06-18 [Pillowthief]: Shouldn't be very expensive- and that's good because...


THE CAKE IS A LIE!!
2010-06-18 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Only on Thursdays, it's ok.
2010-06-18 [Pillowthief]: Zombies outside, non-zombies inside. Misty is re-dead, after several elicit surgeries that we have been unable to prevent, extending her life far beyond generally expected- especially since most of us have tried killing her once or thrice. The cake IS a lie, and Mort says he had a birthday with cake, therefor Mort is a lie. If Mort is not really real, we have witnessed Mort non-kill Misty several times and Hedda once. They couldnt have happened if Mort is not here. Therefor, Turkey has been talking to himself this entire time and has created a persona that almost became a real boy.


Therefor, Turkey is Geppetto.


If Turkey is Geppetto, then Im King Louie the 4th.
If Im King Louie the 4th, you are all my thralls and I order you all to attack Queen Elizabeth of Spain and steal all her cheezburgers, in the name of England!
2010-06-18 [Glitch Sprockyt]: The cake is poison, there's a difference.


Cheezburgers cannot be stolen, go ask nicely.
2010-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *King Louie's men burst in*


"Queen Elizabeth says she has no cheeseburgers. But she did give us these nice, grilled ox testicles."
2010-06-18 [Nekko fox]: *Steals the Cheezburgers and force feeds them to vegetarians*
2010-06-19 [Pillowthief]: That's Deadpools's job! You're as bad as Turkey (Go get a job, you bum!).


And the cake is not poison. I am King Louie. Therefor, you are full of shit. She lies! Get me my cheezburgers! We go to war!
2010-06-19 [Pillowthief]: *The theme song to "The Flying Toasters" begins*


Launch the armada!


*Several high ranking captains being playing 'New Horizons', starting new characters. Two of them fall prey to pirates, one drops out to ply the ivory trade in Timbuktu, three become pirates themselves, and one builds a slightly modest armada of junk ships from India. Utilizing the "Save and Reload" cheat, Captain Tom successfully defeats the first wave of the famous Spanish's Cheezburger defense*
2010-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes back from Timbuktu with a pile of ivory*


*sells it at ridiculously high prices to passing children*


You idiots! Don't you realize the ivory market is skyrocketing right now?! This is a great investment. Tell you what. For only 69 payments of your lunch money, I'll let you buy some ivory. It's the new gold!
2010-06-19 [the wonderfall-man]: *steals the ivory and burns it in a bonfire*
2010-06-19 [Teufelsweib]: *ivory does not burn*
2010-06-21 [Nekko fox]: *It does now*
2010-06-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: ....o_O....
Just call me Honest Abe.
2010-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *John Wilkes Booth bursts in and starts shooting*... *Misty goes down*... *the floorboards give way*...
2010-06-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Holy.......-Uses the force.-
-For something...protectionwise.-
2010-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I use force too sometimes... but only when the woman keeps telling me no. >:(
2010-06-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Sometimes ya just gotta slappaho with a light sabre.
2010-06-21 [Nekko fox]: What did the light saber say to the face?


SMACK!...Er, BZZT! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
2010-06-21 [Glitch Sprockyt]: -Rolls on the floor laughing her arse off.-
2010-06-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-06-22 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Oh.....My.......Baubles...THAT IS AWESOME.
2010-06-22 [Nekko fox]: You bet your ass it is.
2010-06-23 [Pillowthief]: I said HALF THE BUNS! GIVE ME THREE!!! THAT WAS MY SHOE!
  

2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, yeah... I heard you the first time... *hands pillowthief four buns and half a shoe (over the phone somehow)*...


That'll be SIXTY-NINE FIFTY!!!! RRRRAAAAAAAHHH!! *rips shirt off dramatically*


Plus tax. Have a good day, sir!
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in with a melon baller*!!!?!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *fights off robot unicorns with ninja panties*


What did you just say?! Huh?! HUH?!
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: I said GET ME PICTURES OF SPIDERMAN!! *slams a coffee mug on the desk*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes sir! *goes off to class for a day at the lab*...


*encounters radioactive spider*... *gets bitten*... Oh... I don't feel so good... Maybe I'm getting spider powers!


*dies in hospital due to radioactivity*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...nevermind about those pictures, man. I found out you can just make your own on Photoshop! *makes a picture of Spiderman worshiping Satan*


*punches Uncle Ben (not the rice guy. His products are delicious)*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I see... *goes back to catching interplanetary wormholes and the such with his new anything-catching device*... Where's Waldo?! *punches another unicorn*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's no unicorn! ...*takes the cheap, plastic horn off the ugly horse*... it's Misty! ...*punches Misty*...


As for Waldo, his whereabouts are currently unknown. But Sam Fisher will find him. And when he does, he'll do to him what he did to Carmen Sandiego... *points at the mutilated corpse in the corner, next to the oven and the crumpled up "this restaurant is condemned by the federal government. Please vacate the premise immediately" sign*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course! *punches another unicorn*... *unicorns regurgitates rainbows and candy*... Good. *decapitates unicorn*... *juice spurts from its arteries* =...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *gathers up the guts/rainbows/candy/kidneys/happiness particles*


Excellent. This is nearly enough to complete the device. Just a few more entrails and we'll be able to start the process. This unicorn elixir should hopefully fuel the device long enough to complete the plan on schedule.


*stabs a unicorn*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: ...The happiness particles should be enough. Hmm... *eats happiness particles*... Tastes like... happy!


*mauls a group of unicorns*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh great. Now we have too many happiness particles. We have to even them out now with some sadness particles... *decapitates some orphans and gathers their particles in a jar*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: We need some retarded particles, too... *punches misty*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Of course. Also, a few genius particles as well! ...*cuts off own head*... *falls to the floor*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: The retard particles got to you, man. They're quite infectious! *shoots himself*


*hunts down more unicorns and sells the horns for magical elf blood*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tastes the blood*


Man, I think you got ripped off. This is just regular elf blood... With a 15% goat blood impurity. *tastes again* And ketchup. Definitely some ketchup in there.


*dips a french fry in the blood marinade*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Nice... *eats elf blood-flavored ramen*...


Well, time to hunt down more evil, Rainbow Man! RAGE!! *smashes another orphanage with an army of unicorns*... Unicorn ATTACK! *the unicorns impale the little orphans*...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Naw, Rage Boy... naw. Let's just chill tonight... *smokes weed*...


Whoa! I'm seeing rainbows everywhere! *accidentally launches rainbow beams in random directions*... *a government helicopter is hit by a rogue beam and crashes into an elementary school*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *smoldering children scuttle to their demise as they blindly approach the raging band of unicorns* ...Unicorn TRAMPLE! *the unicorns violently stomp the flaming children*


Naw, man. We need to protect justice, dude.
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: You know, I like... think that justice is like... relative, old chum. It's, like, different for everybody and stuff! What might be right to you may, like, be wrong to someone else! And then you'd appear to be a villain or something and...


What am I saying? Stupid marijuana! It's affecting my JUSTICE VISION. *uses justice vision to look for injustice*


There! ...that old woman is attempting to jay walk! *points at an elderly woman crossing the street while cars are stopped at a red light*... *violently rips her head off and kicks it so hard, that it completely demolishes St. Jude's hospital*... *casually tosses her oozing corpse into the busy street below*... I'm BACK! ...JUSTICE!!!!!!!!!! *fires Rainbow bolts from his eyes*... *the bolts blow up a jumbo jet full of tourists*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: That's the spirit! We're only here to uphold the unbiased view of Justice throughout the world! It's not subjective; it's the only way to protect citizens! There's always injustice, though! Look! There's some right now! *points to a group of firefighters trying to put out a house fire*


Those guys are trying to stop the owner of that house from having a bonfire! Those jerks! RAGE CANNON!!!! *fires a mass of compressed energy into the group of firefighters*... *the firefighters disintegrate as the heat from the compressed energy cannon evaporates their molecules* JUSTICE!!!!!!!!


*destroys another furry animal*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Excellent work! Now that man's bonfire is even bigger and better than before! ...look! He's screaming with delight! *points at the man burning alive trapped under a fallen beam*


What's that?! That man is rummaging through people's mail boxes and even taking stuff!! *gestures in the direction of a US Mail Carrier car* This heinous crime shall not go unpunished! Justice must prevail!


*picks up the car and flies above an active volcano*


You must be taught a lesson, sir! *dunks the man face first into the lava*... *he screams in agony as he immediately bursts into flames from the intense heat*... *places the charred skeleton back into the car*... good! I think you learned a valuable lesson here today, young man! No more stealing for you! ...YYYYYAAAAAAAAAAARARRRRRRRRAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!! *flings the car into the lava with such force that it causes the entire volcano to erupt*... *molten magma and flaming embers spew across the tiny Hawaiian village below, killing hundreds and devastating the wildlife*... JUSTICE WINS AGAIN!!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Good job! The people will be so thankful that nobody's stealing their mail anymore! Hark! I hear an innocent animal in distress!
*a cop tries to rescue a kitten from a tree*... That fake officer is trying to damage that poor feline! I'll help you, kitty! *brutally pummels the officer with the power of RAGE*... *officer tries to stand up*... Oh no you don't! *Falcon Punches the officer in the face, creating a large crater of awesomeness within the officer's skull*... *the officer's lifeless body twitches in its last attempt to live*


Now that that's taken care of, I'll rescue you, kitten! *pulls out rage chainsaw and proceeds to cut down the tree*... *the tree falls and smashes the kitten* Another job well done!


*flies off into the night sky as a trail of rainbow dust and happiness particles follow my path* It's good to know that Justice always wins! *punches a flying unicorn*... *eats ramen*...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *a woman silently stares at the carnage in horror, while holding her infant son's hand*... my goodness, Rage Boy! That evil witch is trying to rip that poor midget's hand off! ...RAIN-BOW!! *pulls out a dazzling, shiny bow from his Rainbow Utility Belt*... *uses it to fire a barrage of poisoned Rainbow Arrows into the woman's chest*


Unhand that child, villainess! *rips an arrow out from her chest and stabs it directly into her forehead*... *she falls over, gushing blood as her son starts desperately attempting to wake his mommy up*... You are freed, young lad! No need to thank me! ...just kidding. You can thank me by giving me your lunch money! *punches the kid in the stomach and takes his money*


I can use this money to fund the JUSTICE DEVICE!! *points at the massive, nuclear missile silo on the moon* We can strike down injustice anywhere now!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Great idea, Rainbow Man! We need more funds for our project, though! Look! That bank teller is trying to steal the bank's money! *points to an unsuspecting bank teller who's counting money*... Unhand that filthy lucre, you fiend! *obliterates the bank teller with an awesomeness attack, which pretty much eviscerates the guy*... *entrails scatter the floor*... Gross, man! Pick up after yourself, evil-doer! *shoots fire from the flamethrower of happiness*... That should take care of things! I'll take this cash as thanks! *takes bank money*... More funds for the nuclear arms for justice program!


RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGE!!!!!!! *destroys more orphans in a fit of rage*... Your kind is a pestilence to the world! * liquefies the orphans in a vat of acid*... There! No more inconveniences! *rides a pony back to the Happiness Compound on the moon*... *kills ramen*...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Our nuclear arms shall one day HUG THE WORLD. *clenches fist dramatically and stares hopefully into the distance*


But for now, we must dish out justice the old fashioned way... with Rainbow Powers! *spots a group of protesters outside the Rainbow Cave on earth*... look at all those picket signs! ...think of all the trees that died to make them!! How dare you kill those trees?!?!!?!!!! *grabs one of the signs that are actually made of bio-degradable plastic and stabs it through a protester's leg*... you like murdering innocent trees, huh?! Let's see how you like it! *rips up an oak tree and swings it at the crowd, smashing a few dozen people and even a few riot control officers*... RRRRRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNBBBOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWW....... DEEEESSSSSSTTTTRRRRRRUUUUUUUUCCCCTTTOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... BLAAAAAAAASSSSSSTTTT!!!! *launches a massive amount of Rainbow Radiation in the general direction of the protesters*... *the radiation evaporates millions of innocent civilians into a blood mist and sets several major forests ablaze*... *the fire continues burning until approximately 2/3rd's of the world's vegetation is completely destroyed*... *the smoke from the massive fires block out the sun*... *the consuming darkness covers the earth for several years, in which time the remaining plants and wildlife all die*...


Foolish evil doers! When will you learn that JUSTICE will never fail?!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, that was too much.... LOL jk. *readies up the nuclear arms and launches them towards Earth* RRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGGGGEEEEEEE DESTRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCTIIIIIIIIIIIIIOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNN!!!!!! *in one fell swoop, the entire human race is evaporated from the face of the Earth*


Well, time to relax... *eats Chinese kids*...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...what?! How'd those Chinese kids get up here on the moon?! ...there must be more evil afoot! TO MARS!! *surfs through space on a glorious cosmic rainbow wave*... *misses Mars completely*... *starts attacking Mercury*... *hurls the entire planet into the sun*... there! No more evil in the universe!


Now we can truly relax... once and for all... *eats Japanese kids*...
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: ..........Wow.
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *chases stars while riding a unicorn of happiness* Relaxation at last! Sh*t! More evil is afoot! *the unicorn fires a beam of happiness particles at Semper*


...*eats white kids*...
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Babies taste like fish.
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I see... *pummels another unicorn for disobeying his orders*... *more candy pours out from within the unicorns organs*...


*eats Ethiopian kids*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Or does FISH taste like BABIES?!! *punches a hole through Semper's stomach*... *pulls out three kidneys, a liver, and a bottle of Jack Daniels*


RAINBOW ACTION!! *chugs the bottle*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...oh, and *eats Italian kids*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: No, Rainbow Man! Alcohol is your weakness! *punches Semper's face* Why'd you give him the Jack?! There will be irreversible consequences!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, *eats Icelandic kids*...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *breaks the bottle in half*... *stabs Semper in the face with it*... NO, RAGE BOY...... LOVE is my weakness. *pulls out a heart-shaped locket from his pocket (lol rhymes)*... *stares longingly at the beautiful woman in the picture*... I loved her, Rage Boy... and she... was your mother.


*eats Puerto Rican kids*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: :o


*eats Mexican kids*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dramatic music plays*... where is that coming from?!! ...*a creepy ice cream truck drives by*... oh, nevermind...


*eats Indian kids*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: This can't be true! My mother was... a locket?! *destroys the ice cream truck along with several children*... More JUSTICE! But with a tinge of sadness...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes, Rage Boy. For you see... YOU ARE... half locket. ...*points at the large chain coming out of the back of your neck and your metal torso*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *creates an aura of rage and engulfs the universe in a vast field of corruption and hate*... This can't be!!!!!!!


*eats dirt*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE-oh, hey! a penny! -EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESS!!!!!!!!!!!!! *creates a sandwich of bacon and lettuce*... It's true, my son!!!!!!


*smacks your hand*


NO. That's MY DIRT.


*eats dirt*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Sir, I beg to differ.


*smacks your face*


It's MY DIRT.


*injects dirt*... Oh, yeah...
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: o_o -Eats popcorn, watching intently.-
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't look, Semper! Your attention only fuels his alcoholic rage!


*injects more dirt, causing a pretty bad vessel-ache*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: GET. YOUR. DIRTY. LITTLE. HANDS. OFF. MY...... DIIIIIIIRRRRRRRTTT!!!! *punches Misty in the face*


*snorts a line of dirt*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: No, Daddy, nooooo!!! *watches as his father snorts dirt*... *the countless years of witnessing his father's downfall from the heroic savior known as Rainbow Man to the pile of human filth that he is today, took a toll on Rage Boy*... *and so he feeds*...


*eats ramen-flavored death sticks*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Shut up, BOY!! *smashes a bottle over Rage Boy's head*


Go fetch me another RAINBOW BEER. *smacks Rage Boy around*


*snorts another line of dirt*... *coughs up mud*...
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *urge to kill rising*
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: -Takes out a camcorder.-
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *punches camcorder's FACE*


*snorts needles*


*eats nails... FOR BREAKFAST*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats nails... for breakfast... WITHOUT ANY MILK*
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Sh*t!


*eats a CHAINSAW... WITH MILK*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: WIMP.


*eats A TRACTOR... WITH VODKA*


*punches Frodo*... gimme that ring, punk!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats FOOD*


BTICH.


*dismembers unicorns*
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: HEY. LEAVE THE UNICORNS OUT OF THIS!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: The unicorns started it, though! *unicorns snicker as they come together as a gang in a corner of Bob's Diner*...


They're plotting something... I can FEEL it. *feels*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey. HEY! What a wonderful kind of day! If we can learn to work and play! And get along with each other! *goes into an unnecessary guitar solo*


Stupid Buster... *punches that douchebag rabbit*...
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the gang of chickens and pride of lions conspire with the unicorns*... *they glare menacingly in Misty's direction*...
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: You guys should have your own Vegas act.
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: You should have your own SHUT UP ACT. *quick draws a shotgun and shoots Misty*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah, crap. She's not coming back to life this time... *kicks Misty's corpse*... *glances around*... *buries the body in a massive, meteorite sized hole out back*...


*puts the shovel in [Pillowthief]'s trunk*
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: o_O
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: -Eats a red freezie pop.-
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *checks the freezer*... *there's only purple freezie pops left*...


NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! SEPPUKU!! *stabs self*
2010-06-23 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Aw....
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *the unicorns drink more happiness beer (now served at Bob's Diner!) to cope with the trauma from losing their comrades* 


"Poor Balthazar... he had two foals and a smoking mare at home... he had the candy and happiness beaten out of him, man! *the unicorn convulses and starts attacking random children with his magical unicorn horn (also served at Bob's Diner!)*
2010-06-23 [Nekko fox]: *Orders the Happiness Beer and Magical Unicorn Horn and feeds it to a few stray dogs out back. They immediately begin rutting in the open air, convulse violently upon completion, and die. He reflects on the fragility of life before ordering the same thing, but this time taking it to a pair of hobos*
2010-06-23 [Ninja Smurf]: *Wonders exactly how many IQ points one gives up by visiting the diner*
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well, we usually charge 20 at the door and an additional 10 if you're underage.
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: One of the Takeover's major targets is now under B's D's command. Anthro Lovers is ours now, boys! Huzzah!


Next, we take SHU.
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *chainsaws misty's face*... Aw, there's blood everywhere now... *dumps misty's body in the furnace in the back of the diner*...


*eats SOULS*


There seems to be absolutely no activity in Bob's Diner... We must end this!
2010-06-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well, the only method proven to work in the past is shameless spamming...


Let's do it!!
2010-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Bring it!! *takes out his patented Spam gun*... Mmmm... Spam...


*lurches in disgust from the taste of Spam*
2010-06-24 [Glitch Sprockyt]: I wanna spam gun...-Ever the contributor-
2010-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: No, you want a gun for that spam! *punches misty*
2010-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Donald Trump will be president one day.
2010-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Rainbow Man, I think you're getting the whole Justice thing wrong! *destroys another unicorn*


*eats unicorn meat*
2010-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: NO I'M NOT. I AM JUSTICE.


*eats ramen*
2010-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: There, there, no need to get your rainbow panties in a bunch! Here, inflict justice with this! *hands you a pack of ketchup*


*eats smoldering misty residue*... Tastes like Semper...
2010-06-24 [Ninja Smurf]: Wow, I hate t say it, but I agree with Mort... *gets struck by lightning and falls into the greese that is called a floor here*
2010-06-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: NO.
2010-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yussss... *eats rabid goat meat*...
2010-06-24 [Sunrose]: yawn
2010-06-25 [Ninja Smurf]: All I can say is try crossing the border into Mexico illeglly sometime, see how they treat you... no more serious topics in the diner!
2010-06-25 [Glitch Sprockyt]: NO FOOD!!!!!!!
2010-06-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-06-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh....
2010-06-25 [Pillowthief]: Not YOU! You're not phone!


*Drinks unicorn milk*
Pabst? Bloody hell! When'd they change the label?
2010-06-25 [Glitch Sprockyt]: So so so.
2010-06-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-06-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Wow, that's fucked up, the father should've apologized to the guy after his kid poured sprite in the guy's lap, and it's his own fault he went to jail, he shouldn't have pushed the guy.
2010-06-27 [Flisky]: *was too lazy to read the whole thing* Who went to jail?
2010-06-28 [Nekko fox]:   


  



  



  



  



  



  

2010-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes. I agree.
2010-06-29 [Nekko fox]: And going back to Turk's giant wall of text, I agree.
2010-06-29 [Pillowthief]: So....




Who was phone?
2010-06-29 [the wonderfall-man]: Thats a good question. Her mother?
2010-06-29 [Pillowthief]: HER MOTHER WAS PHONE!?!??
2010-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: The man-eating unicorn was phone, duh!
2010-06-30 [Glitch Sprockyt]: People that light off big fireworks during daytime need to be shot.
2010-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: But that's when they're the most spectacular, because that's when nobody suspects it!
2010-06-30 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Ha!
We're wasting money on fireworks tomorrow yaaaaay. Gonna have a roman candle fight with the dry grass.
2010-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I've found it's always fun to shoot those into traffic.
2010-07-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Someone blew a toilet up with a roman candle, not sure why or how.
2010-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I blew up a toilet once... damn burritos... *eats ramen*...
2010-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Funny.
2010-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Not really.


*Pinches the ends of Misty and then applies a hammer several times and once to the middle lighting her hair on fire directly after*


Hmm. That didn't work, but at least its doing a 'screaming' thing now instead of that 'horrible commenting' that the box said it's supposed to do. Cheap Indians. Im never going to Indonesia for fireworks EVER AGAIN!
2010-07-03 [Nekko fox]: Indonesian fireworks never flipped my switch.
2010-07-03 [Pillowthief]: But Japanese ones do?
2010-07-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: He's so cute.
2010-07-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Nice.
2010-07-03 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-07-03 [Glitch Sprockyt]: Haa that is awesome.
2010-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Not as awesome as...
This!
  

2010-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Yes, I believe that's Dane Cook high-five-ing a linx. You will never be as awesome.
2010-07-03 [Glitch Sprockyt]: o_O That is NOT Dane Cook. That's Andy Whatisface from SNL.
2010-07-03 [Pillowthief]:
QUIET KNAVE!!
  

2010-07-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-05 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-07-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-05 [Glitch Sprockyt]: -Waves a picture of Brian Griffin farting a bubblegum-bubble in front of the moniter.-
2010-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: This isn't Bob's Imageboard! ...This is SPARTA!! *kicks a customer into the hole in the floor*


...wait, no... *checks the sign outside*... nevermind... this is apparently ob's Diner... stupid 'B'... the superglue never holds... *picks up the large 'B' and starts climbing a ladder up the sign pole*...
2010-07-06 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I knew this wire would work! *harvests soldiers trapped in the barbed wire around the diner*


...now we just need a few more Germans and the jambalaya will be ready...
2010-07-06 [Pillowthief]: Mmmm. Delicio-ous.
2010-07-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-07 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-07-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-08 [Pillowthief]: LIES! THE CAKE IS ALL LIES!!
2010-07-08 [Nekko fox]: YOU'RE A TOWEL!
2010-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: But it's so delicious and moist!


Now quiet, you. I'm busy with SCIENCE. *chugs a bottle of Jack Daniels*... *duct tapes two turtles together*...
2010-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, Towelie! *smacks Misty*
2010-07-09 [Nekko fox]:   






*Crowbars Misty*
2010-07-09 [Flisky]: *spam*


Hey, you people here, go submit your poetry at Daily Poem! Why? Because I'll smack Misty if you don't!
2010-07-10 [Nekko fox]: With aforementioned crowbar?
2010-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll smack Misty if we don't submit our poetry? ...clearly you don't understand how we work here... *smacks Misty*...


And I would, but [Linderel] pretty much runs the place and she's a complete idiot when it comes to poetry. There's so much half decent stuff, but nothing but drivel gets put on mainstreet... in fact, let's all boycott Daily Poem!! ...later... *eats ramen*... *reads comics at the cash register, while the ignored people in line start screaming death threats*...
2010-07-10 [Flisky]: Hey! *takes offense* I'm kind of co-running it. And if I saw a poem by Mort on the list, I would post it. As it is, I don't think Mort could write a poem. *smacks Misty with a crowbar* Let that be a challenge to you!
2010-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: You clearly haven't looked hard enough! I believe there already is one... *jabs Misty's spine with a crowbar*...
2010-07-10 [Sunrose]: 'Half decent'... referring to your own poetry? :P
2010-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE A POETRY.
2010-07-11 [Pillowthief]: Yes, I remember Mort's poem. It involved Hedda getting run over by a car, I believe. Wasn't that a holiday poem?


Classic.




YOUR FACE IS A POETRY.
Actually, that's not that bad of a thing.


YOUR FACE IS A POEM BY MORT.
That's better.
2010-07-11 [Sunrose]: *yawns* :P
2010-07-12 [Flisky]: I think it was a Christmas poem...Anyways...GO SUBMIT A POEM!
2010-07-12 [Pillowthief]: /b/ already has. A couple of times.


With your mom.




*smacks Misty's stunt double with a crowbar*


Dammit Timmy! Get out of here!
2010-07-12 [Devil in Me]: grrr i'm back fear me =D
2010-07-12 [Flisky]: *wacks Devil with a crowbar* Go submit a poem!
2010-07-12 [Ninja Smurf]: Actually pillow, that was a slug.
2010-07-12 [Devil in Me]: "go submit a poem"? really why? i don't have any good ones lol.
2010-07-12 [Mortified Penguin]: No, there is currently another poem on there... not involving [Hedda] getting run over by a car...
2010-07-13 [one more lonely girl]: really thats surprising mort. Amanda (devil in me) you have a lot of good one to submit, i've read some and thought wow that girl is amazingly talented so please i know ur good. you should also think about getting that book of urs publishe k?
2010-07-13 [Nekko fox]: As George Carlin (rest his soul of awesomeness) once said,


"I do believe more people write poetry than actually read it."


And I agree.
2010-07-13 [Devil in Me]: yeah i agree with nekko fox
2010-07-13 [~Crimson Angel~]: How can you smack someone when they aren't even on?
2010-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: George Carlin sucked! *spits on his grave*
2010-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *spits on Misty's grave as well*
2010-07-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not dead you fool!
2010-07-14 [Pillowthief]:
.......








(Kills Misty)
2010-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Holy crap. It was that easy?! So much time wasted... *starts burying misty, but gives up and just tosses the corpse in the dumpster*...


Now we can finally resume business! *customers come out of hiding and start ordering*... *the tainted food tastes especially sweet on the glorious day*...
2010-07-14 [Nekko fox]: Hey, who put rotting, disgusting corpse in our good freezer?
2010-07-14 [Pillowthief]: I don't even think that's our freezer. Maybe we bought it off the Pakistan-ians when they were here.
2010-07-14 [Nekko fox]: So it's a latrine now? Yeesh, I can never follow along with all these newfangled ideas.


*Urinates on the corpse in the fridge/toilet and shuts the door. After a momentary pause, he re-opens the door, grabs some possum chili mix and shuts the door again before preparing todays special with whatever things he can find on the floor*
2010-07-18 [Pillowthief]: *yawn*
Wait, what?


I work 34 hours straight and still no comments? Slackers! Bring up the sales!


*A truck arrives nosily outside with a potato chip advertisement on the side, but unfortunately its full of Wacky Waving Arm Inflatable Tube Men! So come on down and comment with our Wacky Waving Arm Inflatable Tube Men! Wacky Waving Arm Inflatable Tube Men! Wacky Waving Arm Inflatable Tube Men! Comment now.*
2010-07-18 [Flisky]: Intergalactic proton-powered electrical tentacled advertising droids! Intergalactic proton-powered electrical tentacled advertising droids! Intergalactic proton-powered electrical tentacled advertising droids


Hi, I'm Darth Harington of Darth Harington's intergalactic proton-powered electrical tentacled advertising droids emporium and moonbase. Due to a garbled sub-space transmission, I am currently overstocked on all intergalactic proton-powered electrical tentacled advertising droids and I am passing the savings onto you!!!!
2010-07-18 [Nekko fox]: I want a cappuccino. I want it so bad, I will fucking murder a cappuccino right now. I’ll kill it and then flip through its wallet until I find the address on its driver’s license, and then I’ll go to its house and kill its fucking family too. I have just no respect for human life right now without a cappuccino. I swear to God, if I don’t get a cappuccino right now, I will turn into a werewolf. I will transform into a wolfman, and in my wolfen state I will bite somebody. And they will bite somebody, and they will bite somebody else, and so on and so on until there is an entire army of wolfmen bearing down on the civilized world. That’s what’s going to happen unless we get two cappuccinos with extra foam in here.
2010-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *shamelessly spams* http://www.facebook.com/l.php?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3D6Gl3hVikZlQ&h=90024
2010-07-19 [Nekko fox]: That's not a fucking cappuccino!


*cudgels the fridge the Misty's corpse is in*
2010-07-19 [Pillowthief]: Improbably, a cappuccino falls out.
Irrationally, the cappuccino is a solid, with brown flaky cream on top.


It seems to be holding its form, even without a visible cup to hold it.
2010-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I have an order of two frappes, no foam here! *throws them in the fridge/latrine*
2010-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *commenting from South Carolina!*
2010-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Eew. It's got that North Carolina stank on it.
2010-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Well... I'm gonna leave now, since this isn't actually my hotel and people are beginning to stare... but then again, they may just be lusting after me. I tend to make people do that.
2010-07-19 [Nekko fox]: Lust after you, or stare in horro?
2010-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Lust in horror? Horro sounds like a bad Zorro porn...
2010-07-20 [Pillowthief]: Its a trick. Get an axe.
2010-07-20 [Pillowthief]: (You all fail at life if you miss that quote)
2010-07-20 [Nekko fox]: Army of Darkness. Pure win.
2010-07-22 [Pillowthief]: You Googled that. Half-win.
2010-07-23 [Nekko fox]: I own the movie. Rape.
2010-07-23 [Pillowthief]: No, that was Evil Dead 1, with the tree. 2x Win.
2010-07-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-24 [Pillowthief]: I win. You lose.
2010-07-24 [Flisky]: Mort is on Main Street everyone!
2010-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, and zombies are on the roof... So wha- HOLY SH*T, ZOMBIES ARE ON THE ROOF.


*grabs a couple of shotguns off the wall and starts firing upward*
2010-07-24 [Nekko fox]: HOLY SHIT! I CAME WITH THE FORCE OF 1000 SUNS!
2010-07-24 [twitchboy]: Use mortar rounds the shoot up to begin with. *Begins blowing zombies off the roof*
2010-07-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-25 [Pillowthief]: I've tried that once. It wasn't so great.
2010-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I've had to stop doing that. The repairs to my house after each time was beginning to get a little costly.
2010-07-25 [twitchboy]: I did that once to.. hit a freaking deloreon traveling in the opposite time flow. Kinda sucked trying to explain it to his insuarance agent in 1976
2010-07-25 [Pillowthief]: My god.


What were you doing cumming in the middle of the street? Kids these days!
2010-07-27 [twitchboy]: something about losing a bet with a duck and having to be exhibitionist
2010-07-28 [Pillowthief]: And that is why I do not place bets with ducks.
2010-07-29 [twitchboy]: SOB cheated...starting to think you cant have five aces
2010-07-29 [Flisky]: And you didn't broil him? I love a good cheating duck.
2010-07-30 [Rising Death Dragon]: A bet with a duck? Hmmm sounds interesting.
2010-07-30 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-30 [Pillowthief]: With orange sauce and a hot bartender. Yum.




Anyways, back to my shameless self promoting! Vote for me on Midsummer Festival Poetry Entries, 2010!


And for some reason, even though I think I missed it- I might have been on Mainstreet again for a grand total of maybe 4 hours. I'll have to double check that...
2010-07-30 [Pillowthief]: Yay! I was featured on Mainstreet!






Thats three so far which qualifies me for the coffee mug, Im pretty sure. I can't wait till I hit four, that one should be the "You all su-uck, you all su-uck, I am awe-somme..." T-shirt.
2010-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Me too! For the second time in under a week. Therefore, I win. Plus, I have twice as many badges as you! But the bastards still haven't given me my coffee mug...
2010-07-31 [Ninja Smurf]: <--- Has thankfully ever been on mainstreet.
2010-07-31 [Flisky]: *giggles* I'm one of the ones who featured Mort...*ponders* What the hell is wrong with me?
2010-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Seriously! *smacks [Flisky]*


On a related note, I'm off to catch dinner now.


  

2010-07-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-31 [Rising Death Dragon]: O.O
2010-07-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-31 [Flisky]:   
2010-07-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-07-31 [Pillowthief]: Given the sad lack of wit and heterosexuality, I dont think you guys understood the exercise.




Vote for me on Midsummer Festival Poetry Entries, 2010!


And remember- "I'm Not A Crrrimmminal" *Nixon pose*
2010-07-31 [Nekko fox]: What's "exercise"?
2010-07-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-01 [Aliz]: How can there be left side and a right side on a pizza? O_____o
2010-08-01 [Nekko fox]: Simple. You look at the two halves. One half on the right, the other...left.
2010-08-01 [Pillowthief]: That's... probably the saddest looking pizza I've ever seen. Price? $13.99.
2010-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, [Aliz], it's a very simple thing. After spending over 9000 hours in Paint, I believe I have created a visual aid that can easily help you to understand.


  



On the right, we can see two slices of a typical pepperoni pizza. On the left, we see two slices of what appears to be Bob's Special Gourmet Pepperoni Pizza. Now, I know what you're thinking... they look the same! But look closer. You see, Bob's pizza comes with a darker crust that lets you know our pizza is a little more crisp and well-done. We do so for your satisfaction!


To help you remember, just think: The one on the right looks alright. The one on the left is made from leftovers.
2010-08-02 [Pillowthief]: THAT'S... probably the saddest looking pizza I've ever seen. Price? $9.99.
2010-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: 65 payments of $9.99 actually (plus s&h). But if you order now, we'll add on two more payments! That's right! ...TWO more payments! That means for only 67 payments of $9.99 (plus s&h), you can have most of what appears to be a pizza (while supplies last)!
2010-08-02 [Nekko fox]:    Sixty five payments of 9.99 (plus S&H)?! That's how much I paid for this suit from the future! It MUST be a good deal!
2010-08-02 [Aliz]: lmao xD but if somebody turns it around, the pepperoni will suddenly be on the left side =0 magic!
2010-08-02 [Flisky]: Or on the upper side. O_O
2010-08-02 [Aliz]:   
2010-08-02 [Flisky]:   
2010-08-02 [Aliz]: Exactly =/ they're just screwing with our heads!! \(;_____;)/
2010-08-02 [Nekko fox]:   



  




  

2010-08-02 [Aliz]:   
2010-08-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-03 [Pillowthief]: Always important for hoodie wearing aliens.
2010-08-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-04 [Flisky]: *nods* Yep...steroids.
2010-08-04 [Nekko fox]: A terrible thing, steroids.
2010-08-04 [Nekko fox]: That;s why they occupy two-thirds of every meal here a BD's
2010-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in with a large, black bag dripping blood*... Where's my shovel?!! ...oh, right... I was using it to eat cereal with... *pulls the shovel out of a box of Steroidio's*... *grabs a 'Roidwich with cheese for later and bursts out through the back door*...
2010-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: If I was that Link's fairy, I wouldn't be pissing him off constantly by shouting, "HEY! LISTEN!" in his ear all the time. Same goes for that frickin' owl. Link could probably eat that thing whole... *bursts back out*...
2010-08-04 [Nekko fox]: GREETINGS FROM THE WORLD OF TOMORROW!


  

2010-08-04 [Pillowthief]: Guess what.


Im drunk.


THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE!
And it's not you.
2010-08-04 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-08-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-04 [Pillowthief]: Dammit. McLeod was finally defeated by Beaker. *cheesy highlander music begins playing in the background*
2010-08-06 [CrystalBlaze]: OMG I love the pics
2010-08-07 [Pillowthief]: To bad the pics think you're an...
  

2010-08-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-07 [Pillowthief]: Not yet. The zombies keep eating them.
2010-08-07 [Pillowthief]: I was meaning to do something... Oh yeah! Persistent pestering spamming! *joy!*


Vote for me at Midsummer Festival Poetry Entries, 2010!
2010-08-07 [Nekko fox]:   



Buzz and Woody are not pleased with this bullshit.
2010-08-07 [Pillowthief]: *squee!*
2010-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Why does Buzz look like Mr. Freeze?! That or Zordon in a new body... which would be awesome. He wouldn't need the Rangers anymore, because he could just kick evil's ass himself.
2010-08-08 [twitchboy]: MIGHTY MORPHING SHUT THE FUCK UP! "Zardonzoid bashes evils face in*
2010-08-08 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-08 [Pillowthief]: Thhhhheeeeeeeyyrrrrrrreee..... pretty easy to catch, actually.
2010-08-08 [Nekko fox]: True.
2010-08-08 [Pillowthief]: They all look so happy when they're about to slaughter and eat the guts out of a pint sized innocent bird. Kind of reminds me of my uncle.
2010-08-09 [Nekko fox]:   



DUCKY!!!
2010-08-11 [Pillowthief]: And this is why I dont smoke meth.
2010-08-12 [Nekko fox]: In Soviet Russia, METH SMOKE JEWS!
2010-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Fire also smokes Jews. In Soviet concentration camps. Millions of Jews.


In more serious news, we're out of ketchup! We're sending a highly trained squad of assassins to get some from Misty's house. *they drive away in a heavily armed tank*


God speed, gentlemen. God speed.
2010-08-12 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2010-08-14 [Pillowthief]:
V.S.


  



WHO WILL BE PHONE?????
2010-08-14 [Nekko fox]:


  



A CHALLENGER APPEARS
2010-08-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i love how this is like... mini /b/
2010-08-15 [Pillowthief]: I am /b/. We are anon.


We am not mini. I am Dragonzord.
  

2010-08-15 [Pillowthief]: (Exerpt from http://www.brushedjeans.info/poems9.htm)


And l like when the teens are talking to each other in school
in the 1993 mighty morphing power rangers episodes
and l like their school in the mighty morphing power rangers
episodes also the power rangers are good at destroying ritas
monsters in the 1993 also 1994 and 1995 episodes of mighty
morphing power rangers also the power rangers are good at
fighting lord zedds monsters too.

Also the power rangers are good at fighting z putties in the 
mighty morphing power rangers episodes also l like when the 
teens are talking to each other in all of the mighty morphing 
power rangers episodes and there are lots of explosions in 
all of the mighty morphing power rangers episodes from 1993 
to 1996 the teens are good friends to each other in all of 
the mighty morphing power rangers episodes the teens are like 
being friends with each other in all of the mighty morphing 
power rangers episodes.

Also the power rangers fight scorpina and golder in the 
mighty morphing power rangers episodes also l like it when 
they are wearing their suits in the mighty morphing power 
rangers episodes also their suits have got bright shiny 
colours on them and in the mighty morphing power rangers 
episodes the teens go to high school in the episodes when the 
teens are in high school the teens can talk to each other.
2010-08-15 @Not logged in user@: ... if only this were /b/ and i didn't have to worry about repercussions...
2010-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a beautiful poem... *wipes away a tear*
2010-08-15 [Pillowthief]: Its hours of reading like that- they really really likes all of the episodes of mighty morphing power rangers. Still cant figure out if all the writings are actually poems or if the guy is just slow. In the head. Either way, he knows ALOT about all of the episodes of mighty morphing power rangers and dedicated a website to all of the episodes of mighty morphing power rangers, and that makes him an Otaku.


I see you /b/! You cannot hide from /b/!
2010-08-15 [Nekko fox]:   



  

2010-08-15 [Kiddalee]: Err... Rules 1 & 2?
2010-08-16 @Not logged in user@: Correct.
And maybe rule 34 as well- you never can tell.
2010-08-16 /b/: Correct.
And maybe rule 34 as well- you never can tell.
2010-08-16 The real /b/: Correct.
And maybe... Hey! Stop that! I am /b/!
2010-08-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-16 [Pillowthief]: There's rule #34. Was wondering when that would pop up.
2010-08-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: HORY SHEET.


We have like 13 more days until B's D's anniversary! *punches Misty in the testicles* Dang it, people! The comment number is ridiculously low this year! ...but the image count is way, way up...
2010-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Let's have some quality conversations, you guys! /b/ob's Diner needs more comments!
2010-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: So how 'bout them fish sticks? They have only half the amount of mold as the last batch! *points at a moldy pile of Slim Jims on the stove*
2010-08-17 [Pillowthief]: Images should count as two. *punches Misty in her other testicles*
2010-08-17 [Flisky]: But...how...I've never seen a moldy Slim Jim before...I didn't even know they could mold.
2010-08-17 [Flisky]: OH THE HUMANITY!!!!!
2010-08-17 [Nekko fox]: fuck your fish. They weren't stick flavored at all!
2010-08-18 [Pillowthief]: Since when did we make Slim Jims and why are we selling them as fish sticks? WHY WAS I NOT TOLD?!?
2010-08-18 [Nekko fox]: FUCK YOUR SLIM FISH JIM STICKS! I DEMAND FAT POULTRY BOB BLOCKS!
2010-08-18 [Pillowthief]: We're out of Bob Blocks, I have yet to hear a good story that surprises me enough to be able to make some more- not since that story of the fat chick trying to order chicken.




That made me crap a few, enough to supply us since then.
2010-08-18 [Nekko fox]: Then make some from the customer.
2010-08-18 [Pillowthief]: *Punches several customers in the ovaries, curing them of AIDS, but no Bob Blocks were dispensed*
2010-08-18 [Nekko fox]: Damn them all!


*Lucifer barges in, devours the AIDS cured customers, and shat out blocks*
2010-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet! Bob Blocks! *eats half of one and throws the rest in the dumpster*
2010-08-18 [Nekko fox]:
  



  

2010-08-19 [Pillowthief]: That produces low quality Bob Blocks. I suggest less cactus fucking may provide a low cost alternative.
2010-08-19 [Nekko fox]: YOUR A TOWEL!
2010-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: No, YOU'RE A CIGARETTE.
2010-08-19 [Pillowthief]: IM NOT A FAG, YOURE A FAG!!!!!
2010-08-19 [Pillowthief]: Wait, I AM kinda a cigarette.










Crap.
2010-08-19 [Ninja Smurf]: Way to keep up.
2010-08-20 [Pillowthief]: Curse my haughty ways! They will be my undoing!!!
2010-08-20 [Nekko fox]: YOUR UNDONE WAYS!
2010-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse my hotty ways! They will be my unzipping!!!
2010-08-20 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2010-08-20 [Nekko fox]:   



  

2010-08-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-20 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, must be the polyester. They should try mixing it with goat hair and [] to create a better AIDS curing weave. That's what I wear! *vigorous thumbs up sign*
2010-08-20 [Nekko fox]: I heard that they use pieces of REAL PANTHER in their weave.
2010-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: SO? We use pieces of REAL PANTHER in our chili!
2010-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Well we use REAL CHILI making panthers!


*Chili Panther promptly arrives and desecrates Misty's remains, her grave, her family plot, her ancestors, and her friends, family and neighbors before vomiting, urinating, and defecating over everything. Passerby simply take pictures and Tweet about it later*
2010-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNOOOOO!!! Stupid Chili Panther! Now the diner is slightly less filthy! ...it's gonna take Pillowthief forever to clean this mess up...


*kicks Misty's remains, because this is all his/her fault*
2010-08-21 [Pillowthief]: I don't really clean. I just fix stuff. Cleaning up after CHILI PANTHER isnt in my job- Oooh! Real chili!
2010-08-21 [Pillowthief]: I suddenly have the irresistible urge to go MISTY BLASTING, similar to HUMP-CATTING!
2010-08-21 [Nekko fox]: IT'S FUCKING EXTREME!
2010-08-21 [Pillowthief]: 300 BABIES!!!
2010-08-21 [Nekko fox]: Four...four hundred...
2010-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Just don't go HUMP-CATTING in public... apparently police and animal rights activists take offense to it...
2010-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: ...also, the cats don't much care for it either...
2010-08-22 [Pillowthief]: What about MISTY BLASTING?
AGGGGGHHHHHH


*Misty's head explodes from the SYNERGY*
2010-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MISTY BLASTING is a national past-time. Why, even president /b/robama participates from time to time. *Obama bursts in through the roof and shoots Nok in the face with a shotgun* Of course, I don't think he knows who Misty is, which makes it kind of hard for him.
2010-08-22 [Nekko fox]: Poor /b/robama...
2010-08-22 [Pillowthief]: *quickly makes a sign out of Noks unused brain pieces, educating /b/robama on who exactly Misty is. Obama quietly apologizes to Noks remains, and smoothly turns the shotgun into the proper direction*


*Bruce Campbell busts in, cutting a hole in the wall with his chainsaw to stop /b/robama, before realizing that Misty isn't really an zombie. He takes pictures instead, of /b/robama with his foot planted on the chest of his latest kill. Those will be posted on the Book of Face later*
2010-08-22 [Nekko fox]: *little does everyone know, but the robot menace has already taken over Book of Face*
2010-08-23 [Pillowthief]:
/b/robotama? Already?
2010-08-23 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, they wouldn't even let me update my page like, totally whatever for sure....lol.
2010-08-23 [Pillowthief]: They tried to do that to me- I almost ROFL coptered them before deciding to just go with an old fashioned mushroom stamp.


Needless to say, the Book of Face doesn't give me any problems anymore.
2010-08-24 [Nekko fox]: So you think you had a hard childhood? Well Fuck you, its got nothing on mine. My mom practically kicked my ass out of the house before I even hit thirteen, and I never even met my dad. My neighbor was this prick who was always beating the shit out of me and telling me l wasn't worth shit. Its not even like I had a choice, the town fucking had something like nine people living in it, I shit you not. My entire adolescence was just moving around from place trying to get along with people who didn't even want me.


You think that's the worst? My only friend was an Asian guy in his twenties or something, who only kept me around because he thought I could help him get laid. The only perk was that I also got to hang around with this cute ginger chick, she was flat as a pancake sure, but damn she was a total nymph. She must have been a sadist or something cause she always took pleasure in hitting me and telling me how she loved to get wet.


But dear god the bane of my existence was this adult couple that I could NOT seem to avoid. You know these types of couples that are absolutely sickening, like they wear matching outfits and finish each other's sentences? Yeah they were fucking creepers, and they had a cat, which was at least twice as annoying as they were, I swear this thing would never shut the fuck up.


Like I said I ended up moving from town to town getting into fights with other kids my age, even adults from time to time.
The only thing that kept me going was my dream to become a pokemon master.
2010-08-24 [Pillowthief]: That works too.


(Fucking cat. It really did never shut the fuck up)
2010-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: You had a bad childhood? I watched as my parents were gunned down in front of me.


  

2010-08-24 [Nekko fox]: You had a bad childhood? My mom was a slut, my father is God and I fucking went extinct for your sins!


  

2010-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh come on, Raptor Jesus... you had a great childhood! It was later in life that wasn't so great.
2010-08-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: My year of running this crap-hole is up! Mort is back in charge now. I like to think I did an excellent job at raising the comment average. You can all thank my hard work with GOLD. LOTS OF GOLD. *pulls out a knife and stabs Misty in the kidney* THAT'LL TEACH YOU TO GIVE ME SILVER.
2010-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Seriously! *smacks Misty around* What kind of jerk does that?!
2010-08-25 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *throws bronze* i'm broke there ya go.
2010-08-25 [Pillowthief]: *Misty screams as the molten stream of bronze melts her eyeballs*
2010-08-25 [Nekko fox]: *records the agonized shrieks and ends up making a record deal. Takes to regularly torturing Misty to further his music career*
2010-08-25 [Tekkon KinKreet]: nooooooooooooo.... my royaltiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeeeeeeeees
2010-08-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-26 [Pillowthief]: Soooooooooo.


I HERD U LEIK MUDKIPZ.
2010-08-26 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-08-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-26 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-08-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: jealous much mario?
2010-08-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-26 [Pillowthief]: Poor, poor, stupid Goofy. How ever did he survive Kingdom Hearts?
2010-08-26 [Pillowthief]: Soooooooo. I totally found a priest that was going to help me find God, but all he found me was this stupid bull- then he was like, Later! Sha-bing! And took off. Fucker.
  

  

2010-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Make tiny burgers.
2010-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Minnie told Mickey she wanted a divorce. "Are you fucking crazy?!" Mickey shouted. "No. I'm fucking Goofy," she replied.
2010-08-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Pillowthief, there was a tragic misfire while attempting to click your image. It was tragically deleted instead of clicked. So, to rectify this, we at Bob's Diner would like to offer you a $5 gift certificate to the salad bar *points at a patch of poison ivy growing out of floor*. (Certificate only usable with a purchase of $200 or more. Expires in ten minutes.)
2010-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *severely docks Misty's pay, as she is likely the one responsible for all this*
2010-08-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Stay out of this, Bilbo! We Sackville-Baggins never liked you anyway...
2010-08-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: You cut that out!
2010-08-27 [Nekko fox]: Nuh uh! YOUR a WAFFLE!
2010-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: So's your FACE.
2010-08-27 [Nekko fox]: So's HIS face.
2010-08-28 [Duke Devlin]: So's your face's face!
2010-08-29 [Pillowthief]: Crap. Now I can't remember which picture I posted. I think it had some thing to do with making fun of Nok's small penis. As a substitute, take this!


  

2010-08-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-08-31 [Pillowthief]: Crap. I've seen that somewhere before. Where is that from?
2010-08-31 [Nekko fox]: It rhymes with "google it".
2010-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe it was already posted on B's D in the past.
2010-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Which does not actually rhyme with "google it"...
2010-08-31 [Nekko fox]: How about story time, eh kids?


We call this story, How Hollywood Decided To Reboot Spider-man (Probably)




There was a bold, confident knock on Hollywood executive Geoff Chaser's rare Brazilian Weeping Tree door. The recently extinct wood slightly muted the harshness of initial knuckle contact, but delivered an authoritative resonance on the deeper notes. Or at least, that's what the salesmen had told him when he bought it.


"Come on in, Chaz!" Geoff yelled, splitting a thin line of cocaine out from a pile on his desk.


"Geoff! Baby! How it do?" Chaz Blazer was decked out in a severe black three-piece suit, yet his dress shirt was completely unbuttoned down to the crotch. It was, inexplicably, still tucked in.


"Take a seat, Chaz. I'm afraid I have some bad news. The studio's been going through some tough times, and it breaks my heart to say it, but I'm afraid we might have to let you go..."


"Oh, god..." Visions of unemployment ran through Chaz's head; he wouldn't go back to the Tanning Salon. He'd burned that bridge a long time ago. And the warehouse next door, too.


"...unless you love this pitch!"


"Ha ha! Yes!" Relief poured over Chaz like kerosene on a hooker. "You fucking nailed me with that one, Geoff! I wouldn't even blame you if you didn't call me the next day."


"I totally wouldn't! I'd leave you a business card with a fake phone number that connects up to a venereal disease treatment clinic."


"Fantastic."


Geoff quickly ran through a series of meditative stretches, then snorted three lines in rapid succession.


"I am burnt today, Chaz. Absolutely burnt out. You want a cappuccino?" Geoff asked, his finger above the buzzer to his non-gender specific assistant, Janice.


"I will fucking murder a cappuccino right now. I'll kill it and then flip through its wallet until I find the address on its driver's license, and then I'll go to its house and kill its fucking family too," Chaz eyed the powder with equal parts lust and hunger. His nose drooled in anticipation.


"Twisted! I'm right there with you, guy. I have just no respect for human life right now without a cappuccino. Janice? Janice are you there?"


"Yes, sir?"


"I swear to God, Janice, if I don't get a cappuccino right now, I will turn into a werewolf."


"What, sir?"


"I will transform into a wolfman, and in my wolfen state I will bite somebody. And they will bite somebody, and they will bite somebody else, and so on and so on until there is an entire army of wolfmen bearing down on the civilized world, Janice. That's what's going to happen unless we get two cappuccinos with extra foam in here, ASAP."


"Right away, sir."


"All right! Let's get down to it, Chazzykins," Geoff finally gestured toward the thin white lines, and Chaz cheerily bent to it.


"I'm sure you've heard by now all about the Spider-Man 4 shake-up? Even though it's pretty much a brand new series, it's still being canceled, recast and rebooted. It is going to be a gritty reboot of a series that is less than a decade old. And that got me thinking..."


"Yeah of coOOOOH GOOD LORD THAT IS MAGNIFICENT BLOW!"


"Why, thank you! I made it myself. I've been getting really into this new Artisanal movement--you know, bake your own bread, brew your own beer, cure your own meat--and this shit here is my pride and joy. Shade grown, hand-cut, environmentally-friendly, 100 percent organic cocaine."


"You can really tell. There's almost a whimsical tone throughout. It finishes brightly, with a summery tartness - and is that hints of cherry I detect?"


"Well, a gentleman never tells, Chaz. But back to business: This Spider-Man movie isn't alone; you know they're doing a gritty reboot of Mad Max?"


"Wow. That was a pretty gritty movie already. I feel like my eyelid is bleeding."


"Oh, it is. It absolutely is."


"Fantastic," Chaz enthusiastically replied, fidgeting in his seat. He quickly took off both shoes and squatted on the floor, rocking on his heels.


"And you're absolutely right," Geoff continued, frowning dismally at his enormous pile of coke, "Mad Max was gritty in every sense of the word. It was dark. Dystopian. Morally bankrupt and violent. Hell, there was even sand everywhere. It was literally fucking gritty - there was grit all over the place! And it's still getting a reboot. You understand? We're reaching an impasse here - there can't be much more done."


"Right right. But you gotta milk that cow until the liquid runs red. Right? What else are you gonna do? Right? Am I saying 'right' too much? I feel like I am. Am I right?"


"You're right. Shit. Now it feels weird when I say it. Listen, Chaz - I'm already goddamn bored with this coke. Would you do me a favor? Come over here and choke me a little while I take this next hit."


"God you're so fucking jaded and I LOVE YOU FOR IT," Chaz replied, removing his belt and skipping around the desk.


"So, what do we do when something's become stale and unprofitable?" Geoff's voice rose to a squeak at the last syllable, strangled off by the seal-skin leather of Chaz's $14,000 belt, ironically adorned with a Pabst Blue Ribbon belt buckle he paid an intern to find at a thrift store.


"You don't mean..." Chaz's grip on the belt slackened as the realization dawned on him.


"We reboot the entire concept of the reboot!" Geoff rasped, before momentarily passing out and falling to the floor. He awoke almost instantly, sporting the kind of erection only asphyxiation and power-dealing can invoke. He crawled back up to his desk and depressed the intercom button.


"Janice, ETA on that cappuccino?"


"Five minutes, sir."


"Army of wolfmen, Janice. Army of wolfmen."


"Where was I? Oh, right. Reboots: What are all reboots?" Geoff continued, his voice regulating.


"Gritty," replied Chaz instantly, as if it were a muscle memory.


"That's right! We take lighthearted franchises and give them a gritty reboot. What I'm proposing is flipping the script: Give gritty original properties a lighthearted reboot."


"Oh tits," Chaz whispered reverently, "I know we just thought of this, but I already want to run it into the fucking ground. I want to bury it."


"I want to more than bury it. I want to take it up to the hills and push it off a cliff," Geoff continued, a blank, frenzied expression overtaking him, "I want to push it off a cliff and then jump off after it, following it all the way down to Earth just fucking... just fucking beating the shit out of it as we fall like Gandalf and the Balrog from Lord of the Rings. I want to die beating this into the fucking ground."




"I can't even properly picture it," Chaz said, weeping cocaine blood onto the pressed slacks that he had sewn onto him every morning for an optimal fit. "I'm too wired for gritty."


"Understandable. Want me to hit you with some examples?"


"Absolutely yes. I want you to hit me until I recover repressed memories about my father. I don't want you to ever stop, ever. No safe words. Wow! This cocaine is bringing me to a dark, dark place and I just could not be happier about it!"


"I'm thinking Saving Private Ryan, but instead of World War II it's a dance competition."


"Holy shit!"


"I'm thinking Scarface... as a child. Think Charlie Brown meets Little Rascals meets True Romance."


"Fuck your brilliance!"


"When he says 'say hello to my little friend'... it's actually a little friend of his; it's like a fucking fairy or something."


"MOTHERFUCK YOUR GENIUS MIND."


"I'm thinking Blade Runner, only this time Deckard is an aging figure skater trying to get his groove back after a bad divorce."


"Holy shit you just ruined my language center! I'm not even hearing words anymore! I agree with the all of the sounds you are making, even though they are not forming coherent concepts in my brain!" Chaz began rabbit-punching his own legs.


"We can reboot everything! Everything! I'm thinking a digital remaster of The Terminator where all the gunfight scenes are digitally replaced by high-fives."


"I love you; I want to fuck you; I just might kill you."


"I'm fucking rebooting the gritty reboot of Spider-Man 4!"


"That's not even out yet!"


"I know, and I don't care! I want a light-hearted reboot of the gritty reboot out before the fucking gritty one is out!"


"You've gone absolutely mad and you will change the course of human history because of it; you are fucking Rasputin!"


"We've got to move on this, Chaz! Quick, get down to production and greenlight every expense you can possibly think of! I need this to happen now!" Geoff was surprised to learn that somewhere along the way he had torn his pure white blazer into shreds and tied one around his head. He also did not recall making the decision to turn over his desk and straddle the remains, but in retrospect it did seem rather appropriate.


"I'm going to run down there, and then when I get there I'm going to keep running in circles while I talk because I feel like if I stop moving now I'm going to die!"


"Do me a favor on your way out, Chaz?"


"Anything! EVERYTHING!"


"Bite Janice on the arm; keep her doubting."


After the door slammed--the unique resonance of the wood reverberating like the shockwaves of a distant explosion--Geoff sauntered over and flipped the deadbolt. He made his way back to the floor-to-ceiling windows that looked out upon the Los Angeles skyline. He took a deep breath, and held it. Slowly, he undid his belt, lowered his slacks and underwear to the floor, and pressed his bare balls gently against the cold, slick glass. After a moment he began, almost imperceptibly, to gyrate his hips. The balls issued a soft, plaintive squeak as they ran across the surface, like windshield wipers in a light drizzle.


"All for you, Hollywood," he whispered affectionately. "That's all for you."








And that, kids, is the end of story time. Now mop the fucking floors or I'll have Jesus beat you again.
2010-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: BUT DID THEY EVER GET THEIR CAPPUCCINOS???
2010-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, Bob's Diner is now six years old! (inb4 pedobear)
2010-09-01 [Nekko fox]: SHE'S ALMOST NINE!
2010-09-01 [Pillowthief]: BLAAAGRAAAGAGAGAHAGAHAGAHAGAA.
2010-09-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-01 [Pillowthief]: You've Discovered An Item!




  

2010-09-01 [Pillowthief]: Now sold at Walmart.
2010-09-01 [Tekkon KinKreet]: so they sellin it in six balls or eight balls?
2010-09-02 [Pillowthief]: Six. Fun Fact: You're gay.
2010-09-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: as long as we're spitting out facts; nobody loves you, your mother thinks you're ugly, and you're adopted.
2010-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: In that case, who cares about her opinion. She's not my mother anyway.
2010-09-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: lol
2010-09-02 [Nekko fox]: My moms vagina is tighter that YOUR moms vagina.
2010-09-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah, well my moms penis is bigger than your moms!
2010-09-02 [Pillowthief]: It is. I've seen pictures.
2010-09-04 [Nekko fox]: Damn, Spring Break 76' finally caught with her...
2010-09-04 [Flisky]: That's what she gets for flaunting.
2010-09-05 [Nekko fox]: I'm talking about your dad.
2010-09-05 [Flisky]: That's like taking a father to a your mom fight.
2010-09-06 [Pillowthief]: Wait. Who was phone?
2010-09-06 [foxyvixen17]: O.O ok nekko sooooooooooooo pwend you guys
2010-09-06 [Flisky]: Pwend? Isn't that the noise a broken laser pistol makes?
2010-09-06 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, but then the results are less than pretty. Take this picture for example!


  

2010-09-07 [Pillowthief]:
Guess What.
I totally made out with your mom.






  

2010-09-07 [Nekko fox]: And then Jesus raped a moose.
2010-09-08 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-09-08 [twitchboy]: lol rejection rejected i guess  and it was horrible
  

by the way this is your mom
2010-09-08 [Pillowthief]: It WAS horrible. And by the way, that IS my mom. Good thing I was making out with YOUR mom.
2010-09-08 [twitchboy]: to bad my mom is dead......kinda  
just cant bring myself to pull the trigger  
2010-09-08 [Pillowthief]: Looks like this one Kiss concert I went to.
2010-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sup bitches?!
2010-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it, Misty! You knocked over my house of cards! ...*the little card family is devastated and left homeless*... are you happy now?!! ...*walks away in rage*... *inadvertently stomps the card people to death*...
2010-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*walks back in with a knife and stabs Pillowtheif repeatedly*...
2010-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles* My job here is done. *disappears in a puff of smoke*
2010-09-09 [Nekko fox]: *Vacuums up the smoke, whistling a merry tune whilst Misty's unearthly smoke-filled shriek fills the room as she and her escape smoke are sucked into oblivion*
2010-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *appears on a nearby table* What'cha doing?
2010-09-09 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2010-09-09 [Nekko fox]: Excuse me, but my programming says that that table is incapable of supporting Misty's profound weight. You are obviously an illusion and of no consequence.


  





Also, an ampersand is not a substitution for the word "and", nor does using two of them in a poorly created .jpeg picture in sequence make an "and" sound. Your logic is faulty. Robot knows all.




Also, did you know Tony Stark made me out of spare parts in a cave?
2010-09-10 [Pillowthief]:
  



Except when it makes fun of Misty. Then its always trust-worthy.
2010-09-11 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-12 [Pillowthief]:
I SAID
  

2010-09-12 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2010-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: You heard him. *hot glues wheels on Misty's face*
2010-09-13 [Flisky]: *pulls out muffler and tailpipe and impales Misty with it* Like that?
2010-09-13 [Pillowthief]: Close enough, but I think you left the trunk open.
2010-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh shi-


I'm not closing it. Nekko can do it.
2010-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *spray paints flames on misty's face*


Hmm... It's alright, but is it realistic enough? Maybe we should just light her on fire.
2010-09-13 [Flisky]: *rummages through some stuff before finding a blow torch* Who said fire?
2010-09-13 [Pillowthief]: But...
That would ruin the custom hood ornament. *nails squirrel to Mistys forehead*
  

2010-09-14 [Nekko fox]: I hear that Misty is powered by


PLUTONIUM




  

2010-09-14 [Nekko fox]: After three hundred miles she self-destructs.
2010-09-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *doesn't even care*
2010-09-15 [Pillowthief]: Good, Nekko hasn't set her on fire yet. Can I get my deck out first?
2010-09-15 [Pillowthief]: Fuckers. Vote!


Midsummer Festival Poetry Entries, 2010



*grumble* *never getting over* *grumble*
2010-09-15 [Flisky]: I already did. :P
2010-09-16 [Pillowthief]: Vote again!
2010-09-16 [Nekko fox]: Best. Sex. Ever.






...EVER!
2010-09-16 [Flisky]: I tried. The page imploded and killed everyone in it.
2010-09-16 [Littel Wolf]: wow i really like what everyone has done on here it was really funny with the menu it made me laugh so freaken hard that i hurt my throat.
2010-09-16 [Tekkon KinKreet]: too bad you didn't choke?
2010-09-17 [Pillowthief]: Yeah. Too bad you didn't choke. *Chokes Misty instead*
2010-09-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey, quit choking the misshapen blob that poorly represents humanity as a whole.
2010-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Cattle can't serve as a representative of humanity! Especially since they still haven't gotten voting rights yet...
2010-09-17 [Pillowthief]: Or fishing rights for that matter.
2010-09-17 [Nekko fox]: Or the right to bear arms.
2010-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't be stupid! Cows would just look weird with bear arms... *eats ramen*...
2010-09-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]:   
2010-09-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: That cow looks funny... I can't believe it's a rapist!
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: What are you talking about Misty, that was takin' out of your family photo album. Said "Great Uncle Angus" on the back. See? You ARE related to fat, listless animals meant for slaughter!
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a Great Uncle named Angus.
2010-09-18 [Pillowthief]: *looks closer* Ah, its not 'Great Uncle Angus', its 'Great Uncle And Gus'. Guess it explains what Misty was talking about with the rapist part.
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: Oop, my bad. Pillow was rigjt. Uncle and Gus.
2010-09-18 [Pillowthief]: Of course Im rigjt.


  

2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: You mean..............  
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: ... Losers...
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: Says the wild hambeast.
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: hambeast?? What the fuck is a hambeast??????
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude, that's lame!
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Cute cat.
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: Don't eat him.
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't eat cats, I'm not Chinese!
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: HEY! Don't stereotype the Chinese people. Stereotyping is a form of racism. Racism is a crime. And crime is for niggers.
2010-09-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Crime is niggers? Now who's stereotyping?
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: Aw, the sarcastic irony is lost.


Oh well.


  

2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: And that kids is the 4chan story of The Defeat of The Wild Hambeast of Mall-World.
2010-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I belive you've posted that here before. And I still find it funny that they banned Misty from KFC like that...
2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: Well what do you expect? You don't assault honest, hardworking folk and hope to get yer chicken.
2010-09-18 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-09-18 [Nekko fox]: HORY SHET! Check out the rolls on Tubby's arms there!
2010-09-19 [Pillowthief]: He obviously has mad skills, 'cause he definitely ate some rolls.
  

2010-09-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-19 [Pillowthief]:
And then some weird shit happened.
  

2010-09-19 [Nekko fox]:                      ^--------------------|


I fuckin' lolercausted an entire gook village with my lmaochinegun while sitting in my roflcopter over that.
2010-09-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate KFC, their chicken is disgusting!
2010-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut your whore mouth! The Colonel's chicken is delicious and you will respect it!
2010-09-19 [Pillowthief]: I agree wholeheartedly, matey. What arr ye- racist? Or maybe....


Thats it, ye landlubber. Misty is a facist. Why didnt we see this before? The crustacious food, the bad taste in humor... It all makes sense now, arr.
2010-09-19 [twitchboy]:   
2010-09-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: What did I tell you about that breathing nonsense?! *smacks Misty*
2010-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: ...*reads his copy of The Daily Sun*...
2010-09-20 [Nekko fox]: Today's Cover Story;


Doctor Frog Lays Claim To Another Harem


  

2010-09-21 [Pillowthief]: Thats not Doctor Frog, its a Snuggie cleverly disguised as Doctor Frog! The humiliation the harlot suffered afterwords was excruciating.
2010-09-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That Snuggie doesn't even have an MD! Just a PhD!
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: BETRAYAL AND LIES!
2010-09-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the fuck is a facist?!
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: You mean fascist.
2010-09-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, what is a fascist?
2010-09-22 [twitchboy]: i form of governmental organization, think hitler  its the economical opposite of socialism (USSR)


my god! i just gave mort dangerous information! god help us
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: God is dead. Mort already killed him.
2010-09-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not like Hitler.
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: Technically, it is a governmental system led by a dictator having complete power, forcibly suppressing opposition and criticism, regimenting all industry, commerce, etc., and emphasizing an aggressive nationalism and often racism. So yes, you are Hitler.
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]:   ><----Misty's response to comments regarding her racial profiling
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]:    <------------Late season Campaign Poster of Misty with her stance on religious freedom.
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: Opponents counter-arguments to Misty----->  
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]:   <-------Public Scandal involving Misty
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: This political update brought to you by Mort's Down Home Cooking, where if it ain't dead when we serve it we'll finish it off at your table, free of charge!
2010-09-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Coming up next, where are all our pillows going? Chief correspondent, [Pillowthief], reports.
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: And now cut to commercial.
2010-09-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: have a craving? bob's diner has what you need! 
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: Debating Religious Consequences? Join Bob's Diner Religious Debate Team concerning Religious Conesquences!


  

2010-09-22 [twitchboy]:   
2010-09-22 [Nekko fox]: Are you wondering where YOUR next delicious dessert will come from? Well check out Bob's Diner's wonderfully original Oil Spill Sundae, now with 100% more pelican!


  

2010-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-09-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: He does like chocolate milk though.
2010-09-23 [Pillowthief]: Jaws thinks you're funny. Looking.


  

2010-09-23 [Nekko fox]: Funny looking you say  
2010-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not Hitler, nor am I like Hitler, and I'm not racist, I'm Jewish so if I was Hitler, or like him, it would be very contradicting.
2010-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: It's possible that Hitler had Jewish ancestry. Leopold Frankenberger, a Jewish man, is thought to have been Adolf's grandfather.


Also, my black friend says you're the type of person who would discriminate against him by calling him a liar. Is he telling me the truth?
2010-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *upon learning of Misty's alleged Jewness, Mort quickly fires up the oven in the kitchen*... Just in case.
2010-09-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... If in fact he was lying and not only I but other people could prove he was lying then he would be a liar wouldn't he, everyone in the world lies about something at some point in time.
2010-09-24 [Nekko fox]: But he was telling the truth! And you called him a liar! What kinda of dirty, greedy Jew are you Hitler? I though you would have more respect than that! Misty, you are a disgrace to the Reich.
2010-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't call him a liar, I said everyone in the world lies about something at some point in time, and if he was proven to be lying he is a liar isn't he?
2010-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: But you never proved he was a liar. You just made a generalization about all of humanity. And in that generalization, you called Muslims a bunch of liars, black people nothing but liars, and you even implied that the Chinese are filthy, disgusting, lying freaks who should be shot in the face repeatedly until they are all dead. But even if my black friend has lied in the past, which he hasn't, it doesn't mean he isn't telling the truth now. You racist.
2010-09-25 [Nekko fox]: Good point Mort. Excellent in fact. As such, Misty is now labeled a Jew hating racist who is also a liar and her name will be expunged from the company Christmas card list.


2010-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: But not the Thanksgiving card. As far as I know, she hasn't said anything too racist about those savage Native Americans.
2010-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: And yes, I realize I'm 1/8th Cherokee, but the only place I'm savage is in bed... Ladies.
2010-09-25 [Nekko fox]: No, your savage...in the kitchen too!


No really, I saw what you did to those bugs and how you cooked them.
2010-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I just said everyone in the world has lied about something at some point in time I never said they should be killed, and I lie sometimes too, so I'm a liar sometimes. Mort savage in bed?! HA! And don't you mean fellas?
2010-09-25 [Nekko fox]: Misty, we don't make lewd jokes about gaping vaginas or homoerotic dick-suckery in this restaurant! This is a clean and family-friendly place meant for congenial eating and pleasant conversation!


*Finishes roasting the bugs Mort crushed earlier and vehemently throws the platters of splattered insects at a family of seven, swearing at them and flinging used condoms at them*


And no, we are not all liars. Just you. You liar.
2010-09-25 [Nekko fox]: Oh, and Mort, the strippers, hookers, and exotic dancers that you trained are home for their mid-month pimping. When should I schedule them in?
2010-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Now is fine. Just give me a second... *drags a dripping body bag out front and hurls it violently into traffic*...


You try to f*ck with me, Jimmy?! Did you think I wouldn't taste the baking soda?! Well now you're dead, motherf*cker... *rubs teeth*...
2010-09-26 [Nekko fox]: Oh Mort, you're such a card!


  

2010-09-26 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2010-09-27 [Nekko fox]: BOW BEFORE AKU YOU LYING HEATHEN ANTI-SEMITIC NAZI HAMBEAST!


*Backhands Misty with a bible which promptly bursts into flames*


  





SWEET ZOMBIE JESUS! IT'S A BOOK BURNER TOO!
2010-09-27 [Nekko fox]: By the way, the soup is done.
2010-09-27 [Pillowthief]: In other news, besides Misty being a filthy lying jew hating racist pig that might not have a soul (otherwise we would have eatien it by now)...


Even though that Muslim hating florida pastor decided not to burn Qorans (yet) for 9/11, Misty's family decided to go along with it anyways. As they were lounging on their "lawn" (or whatever), roasting Qorans on their BBQs (because otherwise they'd just be in a big ugly burning pile, and this way, you can safely grill steaks and hotdogs while enjoying the feeling of ignorance and blasphemy) a dirty hippy came up and stole one of the guy's Qoran. This made the guy pretty sad, because obviously he came to the party with only one and now he was left with nothing to cook his hotdog next to.


This created a dilemma. It's morally and unethically wrong to burn Qorans, but it is also morally and unethically wrong to steal someone else's shit. Who's wrong in this situation- the dirty hippy or Misty's ignorant, racist, redneck family?
2010-09-27 [Tekkon KinKreet]: everything is wrong
2010-09-27 [Nekko fox]: The correct answer is...




Both.


And don't forget incestuous. It's an ignorant, racist, INCESTUOUS redneck family to which that jew hating, puppy-kicking, seal-clubbing monster is party to.
2010-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not a Racist, I love animals, I'm Jewish so I don't hate Jews, and my family are not incestuous rednecks. To all the haters: FUCK YOU MOTHER FUCKERS!
2010-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: "I'm not a Racist, I love animals" - Misty


She is obviously implying that black people are nothing but animals.
2010-09-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nekko said I was a puppy-kicking, seal-clubbing monster, but I love animals, and I am not a racist person
2010-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: "I was a puppy-kicking, seal-clubbing monster" - Misty
2010-09-27 [Nekko fox]: So I'm at this track meet, chillin' out on the bleachers, waiting for my turn to race. Cute girls in skimpy track uniforms are friggin' EVERYWHERE. A group of them are, in fact, on the field stretching. BOOM! Cameltoe spotted! Begin thinking naughty thoughts, and massive boner is hidden by roomy track pants. "HEY! WE CAN'T FIND JOE! WE NEED YOU TO TAKE HIS SPOT!" Slip Mr. Johnson into my waistband as I stand up. Solid snake my way across the field. Take off pants now and am standing in my bright yellow short-shorts. Walk quickly to the blocks, bending quickly to hide massive crotch bulge.


THE MOMENT OF TRUTH IS AT HAND!


The race starts!


Boner IMMEDIATELY frees itself and begins bouncing and waving dramatically, a loud slap registering each time it strikes my thigh. THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE!


It begins spinning as we round the corner!


Dick: "Don't worry buddy! I'VE GOT YOUR BACK!"


HELICOPTER MODE: ENGAGED


Dick propels me into first! Holy shit, I feel like a fucking hero! I even beat those smarmy black kids!


Immediately I receive a prophetic vision of one day creating a helicopter made entirely of dicks.


I still have to walk all the way back across the field to the starting line to retrieve my pants, letting my boner shamelessly protrude. And you know what?


Not a single fuck was given.


So, the meaning of this story is that Misty remains reticent about her anti-semitic, KKK-sworn family no matter how often they are told that, though she directly correlated them to animals, bestiality is not something fondly looked upon in our society. Does she listen? No. Just ask the poor panda bears she whips with bamboo reeds while they try to breed in captivity.


So, in summary of the summary, Misty is the reason pandas are dying.
2010-09-28 [Littel Wolf]: what the hell is ur guys problem?! making fun of someone like that its cool at all. ur acting like a bunch of little kids who have nothing better to do then make fun of someone n lie about someone. grow the FUCK up! this not how adults should act at all. u should be treating people with respect n get to know somebody before u go n put ur judgement on them n spread stupid hurtful lies. and nekko i thought u where a good person. i know u from fake sexy pup was my name on there we talked alot n u seemed like a better person then this. if i could i would smack u right now bc that was bs what u said abou that poor girl. u have no right to do that to somebody even if u dotn know them. i hope u learn to grow up n fast bc if u act n talk like that in the real world someone is goingot beat the hell out of u n u would so deserve it. if u have osmething to say to me then message me on here im not on fake anymore. i left there bc it was people like u who make me sick. i hope that god himself smacks u with a bolt of lightening!
2010-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: That's an interesting point you make, [Littel Wolf]... We are running low on clean spoons! I'll have to break out the bleach. But, wait! Why waste time cleaning the spoons just so they can get dirty again?! I've got it! ...if we pour bleach into the soup, we should be able to save time and money! Instead of getting them dirty, when people eat here, they'll be cleaning our spoons for us! Thanks for the awesome suggestion, [Littel Wolf]! Now we can afford to fire Paco. PACO, YOU WORTHLESS PIECE OF GARBAGE, I WANT YOU TO PACK UP YOUR F****** STUFF AND GO BACK TO MEXICO. OH, WHINE WHINE WHINE. YOU THINK I CARE THAT YOUR WIFE IS PREGNANT?! KNOWING THAT WHORE, IT'S PROBABLY NOT EVEN YOURS. NOW GET OUT, BEFORE I CALL INS! *spits on Paco as he runs out the door crying*


*sigh*... twelve-year-olds these days... *rummages through the stuff Paco left behind in his locker*...
2010-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, cool! Pictures of his dead family! ...we were out of toilet paper... *re-stocks the bathroom*...
2010-09-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: righteousness is over rated



2010-09-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: [Littel Wolf], i just sank your battle ship
2010-09-28 [Mortified Penguin]: But... that was just a cruise ship! You just killed 6,000 innocent civilians! And also Leonardo Dicaprio for some reason!
2010-09-29 [Pillowthief]: That was probably the coolest part. Raptor Jesus somehow saved him though so he could make more movies, unfortunately.
2010-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   


They will all be remembered and sorely missed.
2010-09-29 [Tekkon KinKreet]: damn... leonardo was fated to die today.... i failed
2010-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Wait, wasn't Paco's grandparents, aunts, and uncles aboard that ship?
2010-09-29 [Tekkon KinKreet]: nooooooooo me familia!!!!!!!!!
2010-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Don't worry Paco! Border patrol can be your new family now! AND LOOK! Misty decided to give you a ride!


  

2010-09-29 [Olwen]: [Nekko fox] I love that picture :D
2010-09-29 [Nekko fox]:
The internet is changed. . .
I feel it in videos.
I feel it in forums.
I see it in the Google.
Much that once was, is lost.
For none now live, who remember it.
It began with the forging of the great boards.
3 were given to the Neckbeards; oldest, wisest, and fairest of all posters. /tg/ /g/ /sci/
7 to the porn lords. Great minors and faps men with blue balls. /y/ /u/ /e/ /d/ /gif/ /h/ /s/
And 9
9 boards where gifted to the Oldfags, who, above all else, desire entertainment. /a/ /c/ /f/ /r/ /t/ /v/ /cgl/ /co/ /jp/
For within these boards was bound the strength and will to satisfy each browser.
But they were all of them deceived
For another board was made.
In the land of Camwhores.
In the fires of Futaba script.
The dark lord Moot forged, in secret a master board.
To troll all others.
And into this board he poured his cruelty, his malice, and his will to propagate strife.
One board to troll them all. . .
One by one the good boards of 4chan fell to the power of /b/.
But there were some . . . who resisted.
A last alliance of Oldfags and Neckbeards marched against the newfags of /b/.
And on the threads of tripfags they fought for the decency of 4chan…
Victory was near.
But the power of /b/. . .
Could not be undone.
It was in this moment, when all hope had faded.
That WTSnacks, son of the sage, took up his father’s banhammer…
Moot, the enemy of the good browsers of 4chan was defeated.
/b/ passed to WTSnacks, who had this one chance to destroy evil forever.
But the hearts of mods are easily corrupted.
And the board of power, has a will of it’s own.
It betrayed Snacks, to his permaban.
And something’s that should not have been forgotten were ignored.
History became legend.
Legend became myth.
And for two and a half thousand threads, /b/ lost all knowledge.
Until, when chance came.
It ensnared a new poster.
/b/ came to the creature Boxxy.
Who took it deep into the comments of the YouTube videos.
And there . . . it consumed her.
“It came to me! My own, my love, my own, my . . . precious. BOXXY”
/b/ brought to Boxxy unnatural long attention.
For five hundred threads it poisoned her mind.
And in the gloom of Boxxy’s YouTube profile, it waited.
Darkness crept back into the sites of the world.
Rumor grew of a shadow in the east.
Spoilers of a nameless fear. . .
And the board of power perceived.
It’s time had now come.
It abandoned Boxxy. . .
2010-09-30 [Pillowthief]: But something happened then the board did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable.
  

2010-09-30 [Tekkon KinKreet]: it's horrific!!!! my eyes are burning. *falls over dead*
2010-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *vultures pick at [Tekkon KinKreet]'s body*... hey! HEY! Get away from that sandwich meat! *shoos the vultures away with a skillet*
2010-09-30 [Olwen]: haha :D chocolate rain! Thats very clever ^-^
2010-10-01 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-10-01 [Nekko fox]:    Eat me.
2010-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Im sorry, I cant hear you over the Dicks....


  
 ...Burgers, in my mouth.
2010-10-01 [Nekko fox]:
Dicks?!


  

2010-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I love getting instantly serviced by Dicks.
2010-10-01 [Ninja Smurf]: Somehow I find that both unsurprising, and slightly disturbing.
2010-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: You don't like thick, juicy Dicks beef in your mouth?
2010-10-02 [Olwen]: I do....
2010-10-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I still say a much better prank is leaving a dead body in the middle of a hallway. Ha ha! Oh, the faces of the kindergartners when they see their teacher lying there!
2010-10-02 [Nekko fox]: I was thinking of their parents, but other authoritarian figures work, I suppose...
2010-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: That works too. As long as they end up thoroughly traumatized and/or dead, the prank will be a success.
2010-10-02 [Nekko fox]: OH! I got a real knee slapper!




MUSTARD GAS!
2010-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha! What about napalm? Imagine the look on (what used to be) their faces!
2010-10-02 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Knee slapper!? hahaha
2010-10-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: ok... someone has to say it... you guys are sick! now, with that said, my roflcopter goes SWASWASWASWASWA... facemelt
2010-10-02 [twitchboy]: no no no! giving a room full of kindergartners flame throwers in the shape of water guns!
2010-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Or you could set the room up with hundreds of candles and give them water guns filled with gasoline!
2010-10-02 [Nekko fox]: Or give them all pieces of their parents deep fried in batter so they think they are eating chicken nuggets! hilarity!
2010-10-02 [Pillowthief]: I LIEK CHICKIN NUGGETS.
2010-10-03 [Tekkon KinKreet]: BUTTERED TOAST
2010-10-03 [Tekkon KinKreet]: chicken fingers... deep fry their parents fingers...
2010-10-03 [Nekko fox]: The parents are really Jewish, so it's okay.
2010-10-03 [Nekko fox]:   



You see? Misty really is a Jew-hating, puppy-kicking, seal-clubbing, incestuously-inclined hambeast monstrosity bent on world domination in order to fuel her fascist ideals and further crush the down-trodden people of our good nation through under-handed word-play, mind-games, and the destruction of all our wholesome family ideals. Also, she doesn't like our family-lickin' fried fingers. What kind of horrible monster hates B's D's Dinners?
2010-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Seriously! ...*eats Pizza Hut, because the food here is disgusting*...
2010-10-03 [Nekko fox]: You're now chatting with a random stranger. Say hi!
Official messages from Omegle will not be sent with the label 'Stranger:'. Strangers claiming to represent Omegle are lying.
You: Hi.
Stranger: helllo
Stranger: im 99
Stranger: f
Stranger: neverland
You: I'm gonna call bullshit on that one.
You: Everyone knows that there are no girls in Neverland.
You: Except Wendy, but no one likes her.
Stranger: yes there is
Stranger: im wendy
You: *GASP!*
You: I'm Peter! Peter Pan!
You: Wendy, where have you been?!
Stranger: no ur not ur lien peter is here wiv me
You: I looked everywhere in the kitchen for you but you weren't in there making me a sandwich like you were supposed to!
Stranger: i hv been to neverland
You: What the hell?
You: Me and the Lost Boys are fucking starving to death and your fucking strangers on Omegle?
Stranger: i left u to make ur own sandwich
You: Wendy...I am disappointed in you.
You: Everyone knows you don't leave the Pan.
Stranger: peter go n fuck ur self
Stranger: make ur own food
Stranger: typical men
You: Bitch don't talk that way to me. You were the one writing wet-dream stories and telling them to your brothers.
Stranger: fuck you
You: I came and took you to paradise and you got all huffy when I asked for something in return!
Stranger: tahst nuthing to do wiv you
You: God, your like that Stephenie Meyer hack.
Stranger: thats*
Stranger: :P
You: At least you didn't make me sparkle in your stories.
Stranger: k im hungry naw
You: Maybe you shoulda made some SANDWICHES.
Stranger: go n make me a sandwich
Stranger: you should hv learnt how to by naw
You: Fuck you, tramp. I'm my own man now.
You: I just kill pirates and eat them raw.
Stranger: oh fuck sake
You: Hey, don't be hating cuz I fight pirates and befriend indians and your a second-class citizen.
Stranger: u should at leats heat it up
Stranger: least*
You: Everyone knows pirate is best served cold.
Stranger: no there not
You: It's like bisque.
Stranger: i like it cooked
You: They ARE Russian pirates, after all. What are you, racist?
Stranger: im 1st class citizen ur second peter
Stranger: im from uk
You: God Wendy, what was I thinking when I brought you to Neverland.
Stranger: nd ur from originally*neverland
Stranger: so dont tell me
Stranger: whos 1st nd 2nd citezins
You: Bitch, everyone knows UK is a piece of shit and I saved you from your abusive dad and passive aggressive mother.
Stranger: oh fuck u
Stranger: tinker was jealous
Stranger: u had a thing goin on wiv her
You: Next thing I know, you're waltzing around demanding attention and shit when I made a goddamned WORLD for you to enjoy forever and you get all up in my grill about wanting to go home and having rights and shit.
Stranger: ur a hypocrit
You: Tink was a hundredth my size. How am I gonna fit my dick in that?
Stranger: thats what i was thinkin
You: And I know all about your affairs with the other Lost Boys, Wendy, you little slut.
You: I found pictures of it all over the internet.
Stranger: fuck u peter go bk to tinker
You: You think you can post that shit in Facebook and it won't get around?!
Stranger: lovely
You: Stupid whore.
Stranger: its d whole point peter
Stranger: fuck u u man slut
You: What, that you can take more dick than Tink?
Stranger: i wonder how many girls uv tooken to neverland before me
Stranger: i was just an inocent victim ready to be tooken advantage of
You: Bitch, I don't kiss and tell, unlike you you flaming tramp.
You: I screencapped your FB status "LOL SUCKIN OFF DEM LOST BOYZ BRB"
You: Sent that shit to your mother.
Stranger: im not a tramp i come from a very rich bk ground
Stranger: ur d tramp
Stranger: u seen what u live in?
Stranger: a tree wtf?
You: Girl, when I get laid, the Lost boys cheer. When you fuck all of them, they just label you as an easy lay.
You: And girl, We went green up in this bitch. Now you knockin' nature?
Stranger: oh fuck ur gay
Stranger: whjat did d lost boyx do before me ?
You: Well, they tried Tink and then that Indian princess.
You: Nearly split Tink in half.
Stranger: oh right
You: The princess was reluctant at first, but Rohyphnol fixed that.
Stranger: r u sure they didni get u ?
Stranger: i heard peter was gay
You: Pfft, get me? Bitch, I can fly to the mother fuckin' EARTH and back, why do I need to experiment.
Stranger: was taht an afetr affect?
You: Unlike you and your little brothers, you goddamn pedo sleaze.
Stranger: after*
Stranger: hmmmm
Stranger: im a true pedo
Stranger: want to give me a gold medal?
You: Naw, bitch. I think I'll just tag you a slut and give your mom a call tomorrow.
You: Laterz biatch!
2010-10-03 [Olwen]: rofl
2010-10-04 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: erm...random.... o.O
2010-10-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-04 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: heheh he looks queer
2010-10-04 [Pillowthief]: So does YOUR FACE.
2010-10-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-05 [Araglas]: creepy....
2010-10-05 [Araglas]:   
2010-10-05 [Nekko fox]:   



                                     
MORE BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD!
2010-10-05 [Pillowthief]:
GOT TO MOW THE LAWN FIRST, BIOTCH!
  

2010-10-05 [Nekko fox]:
HOLY SHIT! MOTHERFUCKING LAWN ALIENS!


  

2010-10-05 [Pillowthief]: Worse than lawn gnomes. Or Hilary Clinton.
2010-10-05 [Nekko fox]:   


And this is how Misty's family was culled.
2010-10-06 [Flisky]: That explains everything...
2010-10-06 [Nekko fox]: Of course it does! The Rolicoptruck is the answer for all your orphan troubles!
2010-10-07 [Pillowthief]: We keep it in the garage out back, with the big Pakistani/zombies lock on it.
2010-10-07 [Nekko fox]:   


This guy took care of the rest of Misty's hellish kin.
2010-10-07 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, but who's the marine he's bro fisting?
2010-10-07 [Nekko fox]: HE'S ALRIGHT BY ME


  

2010-10-07 [Olwen]: i nearly died when i saw that. kept getting stephen king flash backs...
2010-10-07 [Nekko fox]: It's creepy because I was watching Futurama and there came up a discussion of Stephen King.
2010-10-08 [Pillowthief]: No, its creepy because Misty was watching you while you were watching Futurama and there came up a discussion of Stephen King.
  

2010-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty looks a little less hairy than usual in that picture.
2010-10-08 [Pillowthief]: Even on her bad days, she's still less hairy than [Sunrose]...
Although in her defense, I will say Sunrose looks pretty smashing in her beard.
2010-10-09 [Olwen]: Hehe! I like how you use "smashing"... I'm English and it sounds funny!
2010-10-09 [Pillowthief]: That's because here at Bob's Diner(c), we respect and encourage racial diversity!


With the exception of those dirty hippys, everyone is welcome!
2010-10-09 [Olwen]: Do you consider English people as being of another race? ;)


Don't mind hippies, as long as they have short legs.
2010-10-09 [Pillowthief]: ?
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: No no no, Hippies have long legs. You're thinking of Carnies and Pikers.
2010-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Whatever. Point being, racial diversity is an essential part of Bob's D- DANG IT, PACO, YOU FILTHY WETBACK! I TOLD YOU IF YOU COME BACK, I'D HAVE YOU DEPORTED! IF YOU WANT YOUR KIDS BACK ALIVE, YOU'LL STAY OUT!! -iner. We strive to bring people together, no matter what ethnicity or background! And if we can't bring them together... we'll tear them apart... *snaps a ladle in half*... *goes back to stirring the soup with half a ladle*...
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: Mort, don't waste that other half a ladle. Feed it to the Jews out back. Oh, and I think they're trying to siphon gas out of your car, but I don't think they realized that's the septic tank. Misty is in there now with the rest of her family.
2010-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha! Feed the Jews... that's a good one... but seriously though. I thought that napalm scared them away? *gets shotgun* I'll be back in a minute...
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: *Goes back to preparing the roast "What The Hell is this under the fridge? Whatever, I'll just cook it with what I scrapped off Mort's back tires" with some thyme and cumin*
2010-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! I spent a lot of time collecting that stuff on my tires... it's gonna take forever to get another good pile going...
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: Nah, Paco is sleeping under the car now...
2010-10-09 [Pillowthief]: The cat is chewing on him. I dont think he's asleep. Well, I think its a cat.
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: That's a possum.
2010-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a possum.
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: YOU'RE FACE when you realized that I called you Face.
2010-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ...


YOU'RE a cigarette!
2010-10-09 [Nekko fox]: I hope not! I never liked exuding carcinogens...
2010-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You're going to want to avoid our new Carcino-Jello© then...
2010-10-10 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his tubful of Carcino-Jello©, his mouth full*


Wuthat oo thay?
2010-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I said you're going to want to take advantage of our new deal! Buy one industrial sized tub of Carcino-Jello© for the price of two!
2010-10-10 [Nekko fox]: I'm a good investor.


I'll take eight.
2010-10-10 [Pillowthief]: You're a possu- wait. how all these comments appear before my burn was posted?!? Damn you Raptor Jesus, for pushing me 21 hours into the future! I could have done something important today! Or something... *grumble*
2010-10-10 [Nekko fox]: I hear doing things is the way of the Devil. Are YOU persuaded by the Dark One's will Pillow, hm? Are you? Answer me! TELL US THE TRUTH!


*Beats Paco with the broken ladle*


BECAUSE WE DON'T DISCRIMINATE HERE AT B'S D UNLIKE CERTAIN HAMBEASTS OF THE MOBILE PERSUASION!


Now, would you like some chili with your choir boy?
2010-10-11 [Pillowthief]: Wasn't Paco getting eaten by the possum a couple comments back?
2010-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe. Paco does a lot of things... except WORK HARD ENOUGH. *smacks Paco with a toilet scrubber* JUST BECAUSE YOU DON'T HAVE HANDS DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN'T JUGGLE TO ENTERTAIN THE CUSTOMERS. NOW DO IT! I DON'T CARE THAT I FIRED YOU AND/OR KILLED YOUR FAMILY! STOP MAKING EXCUSES!!
2010-10-11 [Aliz]: Toilet scrubber... O______o
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: And I can beat Paco with a broken ladle, even while he is being eaten by a possum. We here at Bob's diner, Cafe, Grill, Spa, Bar, Eatery, Pizzeria and Pharmaceuticals are well versed in the art of multitasking.


*turns and falls down while chewing gum and trying to walk*
2010-10-11 [Tekkon KinKreet]: Hey... about that pharmacy part... where's the pill counter? *looks around* i don't see it
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: *Waves a hand from the floor*


We keep them under the floorboards next to the Jews, Zombies, and Robot Pirates Association of Democratic Peace and Flesh-Eating. And by pill counting, do you mean meth lab?
2010-10-11 [Tekkon KinKreet]: well... i want to go down there.... got a flame thrower? those jews are afraid of fire i hear, and gas... and by pill counter, sure why not meth? and rock, and just plain pills, its whatever.
2010-10-11 [Pillowthief]: THEY'RE MY PILLS, MINE!


*couch*


I mean, pillows. Crap.
2010-10-11 [Pillowthief]: Great. Now I got that fucking weird cold again. DAMMIT NOK! Stop making me sick! Get out of my sight! *chugs happy pills*
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: *Watches in bemused silence as Pillow proceeds to drink the liquefied remains of Paco's estranged sister*
2010-10-11 [Aliz]: What couch? XD
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: Who mentioned Lord Coushe?! NO ONE SPEAKS OF THE OVERLORD WITHOUT A HORRIBLE TALKING TO FOLLOWED BY GENTLE REDIRECTION OF ONE'S LIFE GOALS!
2010-10-11 [Aliz]: *hands you glasses*
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: Oh, THAT couch. Yeah, that's just Paco's horribly maimed family, condensed into the shape of a couch by Misty's horribly obese, incestuous, puppy-kicking redneck family's constant sitting's-on.


We like to keep them here to make Paco feel more at home. We hope you don't object, because only dirty Commies don't care for the feelings of others.
2010-10-11 [Aliz]: But isn't Paco outside, under that car?
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: *Points at Mort's car, parked in the kitchen, where a possum is gnawing eagerly on a ladle-handle-beaten leg*


Who parks outside anymore? This way you can heat the entire restaurant with the engine, cure the meat with the cars emissions, and even re-rubber the old door mat.
2010-10-11 [Aliz]: Ah, good thinking =0
2010-10-11 [Nekko fox]: Now help me cook these orphans. They've been stealing trash again, even though they KNOW we use that in our salads made ready to order for the customers enjoyment.
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: I don't even work here, but allrighty! :3
Should I chop them into bits first, or cook them whole?
2010-10-12 [Flisky]: Cook them rotisserie style.
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: But.... I don't how ;______; I never worked in a kitchen before ;_______;


Oh wait, I did, but I still can't cook ;_______;


Can't I just fry them? D:
2010-10-12 [Nekko fox]: Frying is a kind of cooking, so no. Just roast them over Mort's cars burning engine.
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: Ok :D
*stabs the orphans with a barbeque spear and starts roasting them*
2010-10-12 [Flisky]: Where are these orphans' parents and why aren't they roasting them?!
2010-10-12 [Nekko fox]: They were eaten by Misty's family. We held a beautiful funeral for them that no one attended.
2010-10-12 [Flisky]: I wasn't invited! See, what kind of courtesy is that?
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: I wasn't invited either ;____;
And I wanted to sing a song too D=
2010-10-12 [Nekko fox]: No one was invited. Who wants to see the parents of orphans? Sheesh.
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: But I wanted the FREE DRINKS goddamnit =C
2010-10-12 [Nekko fox]: Too late. Misty's family drank those.
2010-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry, I've still got some punch in storage... I'll be right back... *goes to the bathroom*... *stops in front of the door*... hmm... "Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate"? I don't recall inscribing that in blood over the door... oh well...
2010-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ...what?! *kicks the toilet* Who emptied my frickin' punch bowl?! Stupid Nok! *punches [Aliz] in the kidney* Now I'll have to pick some up from the dumpster behind the hospital!


*gets in the car and backs out of the kitchen and through the front door, running over 12 customers, a cop, and a health inspector in the process*... damn it all! I'm not going back to prison! *speeds into oncoming traffic, dragging Paco's lifeless body behind*
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: Well, I guess this means we don't have to get rid of the cockroaches yet :D
2010-10-12 [Nekko fox]: Don't be daft, the cockroaches moved out on their own when we took on Paco.
2010-10-12 [Flisky]: Hey! We was cookin' orphans on that car!
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: If it's not cockroaches, what are those things under the sink then? :C
2010-10-12 [Flisky]: Bedbugs. They are learning about mass mobilizations.
2010-10-12 [Aliz]: ...then who's sleeping under the sink? O_______O
2010-10-12 [Nekko fox]: It USED to be Misty, but we cleaned out the last of her grease long ago.
2010-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]:   


Good one!
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: HA! Yeah, I'm such a comedic genius. But yeah, by clean I meant "set fire to".
2010-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I cleaned my ex-wife's house after the divorce.
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: I cleaned the Police Station.
2010-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I cleaned the homeless people that wouldn't stop hanging out by the door. I cleaned 'em good.
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: I cleaned Misty's family when they came by but they resisted the cleaning with their incestuous, dog-beating jowels. Curse them! So I cleaned a few Jews instead. Misty's family left shortly after to snort their ashes and do cocaine lines at the local homeless shelter, taking the place of several beloved hobos that mysteriously disappeared after being offered a strange job doing "home Cleansing". Ah, well, I'm sure it's nothing.
2010-10-13 [Aliz]: I offered a job like that, but nobody showed up =(
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: the nerve of those homeless people. Wait, when did you say you wanted them to come in for an interview?
2010-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *the car comes crashing back in through the roof, landing on Taco, Paco's illiterate, mentally retarded cousin*... sorry, Wal-Mart was out of lettuce... I did pick up a creepy Halloween costume though... *holds up Misty's skin*... apparently, the only size they had was X¹³L...
2010-10-13 [Pillowthief]: Cocaine is getting expensive. *snorts Taco's remains*
Fuck, that burns. Oh yeeeah...


Has anyone noticed that Misty hasn't commented in quite a while?
RAPTOR JESUS!!
Crap, Mort, you scared the bejeebus out of me. Put down that whale carcass!
2010-10-13 [Aliz]: Like, 4 years ago =C
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: *Approves of Mort's home-made whale costume* Very nice.


*smacks Pillow with a Chaco, Paco and Taco's estranged third cousin* Of course she hasn't. She's too busy trying to eat all of mankind. What are you, daft?


*Chews on Aliz's head* Narm.
2010-10-13 [Mrs Vicious.]: ....wow.
2010-10-13 [Aliz]: You shouldn't do that. I use poisonous shampoo =/
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: It's okay, I have a corrosive personality.


  

2010-10-13 [Mrs Vicious.]: hahahahahaha, epic, I saw that on DA the other week.
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: We really don't execute enough women these days...
2010-10-13 [Aliz]: Hey, we don't execute anyone at all =|
2010-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You disgust me! Go out now and find the nearest sinner and stone them immediately. As for me, I'll just stay here and shoot this potato launcher at customers... *loads a piping hot baked potato and launches it at some pregnant woman without a wedding ring*...
2010-10-13 [Nekko fox]: *Immediately begins stoning people using Industrial-Grade PCP, LSD, Heroine, Angel Dust, and whatever else they had underneath the kitchen sink*
2010-10-13 [Mrs Vicious.]: *casually munches popcorn and watched the goings on* Use frozen potato's theyre almost as good as a rock.
2010-10-14 [twitchboy]: Cpt. Mort sir we ran out of scarlet letters, how will we know the virgins from the harlets?
2010-10-14 [Nekko fox]: Who cares? Stone them all. *Brings out the Special Deluxe Frozen Sweet Potatoes*
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: ooohh... now your just showing off. Did you guys know theres such a thing as a purple potato?
2010-10-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-14 [twitchboy]: KILL THE MAC!!!  stupid igun
2010-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-10-14 [Aliz]: iPotato O_____o
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: I just realised that you were answering in the form of pictures, does this mean I an reply in the form of interpretative dance from now on?
2010-10-14 [Aliz]: Yes :D
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: Lurvly.
2010-10-14 [Aliz]: Isn't it <3
SO START DANCING D:<
2010-10-14 [Flisky]: *pulls out shotgun and aims at Vicious's feet* Start dancing!
2010-10-14 [Nekko fox]: *Saws off Vicious' feet* Start dancing!
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: .. how am I to dance if I hath no feet?
2010-10-14 [Aliz]: YOU HAVE ARMS!
2010-10-14 [Flisky]: And you still have legs...Sort of.
2010-10-14 [Nekko fox]: No no, she has legs. It is simply a matter of nothing at the end of the legs.
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: your powers of observation are outstanding, indeeds I have legs and arms, but without feet, dancing would be nigh-impossible.
2010-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: You say that like it's our problem. NOW DANCE.
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: Tis, seen as you would like me to dance and [Nekko fox] cut off my feet, thus no dancing. *finishes sharpening pencils and gets out an elastic band.* Any problems?
2010-10-14 [Aliz]: ;__________________;
2010-10-14 [Flisky]: *points gun at Vicious's hands* Then do some strange arm dance!!!
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: *Points sharpened pencil sling shot at Flisk* You do it.
2010-10-14 [Flisky]: *gives up the draw and shoots Vicious in the hands* Anyone for soup? We got these feet and hand parts!
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: *pouts and sits up, firing a pencil right at Flicks ass.* yeaahhhh...
2010-10-14 [Flisky]: ...My computer went crazy and posted things...Alright! Who possessed my computer?!
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: *shrugs* I dunno, Im off take a shower, see ya in a bit.
2010-10-14 [Aliz]: I possessed it >:D
2010-10-14 [Flisky]: *shoots computer, then remembers it isn't actually her computer, shrugs and gets on a new computer*
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: hahahahaha epic. *dries hair* so what do we do round here? cos Im starving.
2010-10-14 [Nekko fox]: I blamed Misty for all our problems.
2010-10-14 [Mrs Vicious.]: who's misty?
2010-10-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats breakfast at night, because he is a man*


  

2010-10-15 [Aliz]: How did the gun taste? =]
2010-10-15 [Tekkon KinKreet]: like death... cool, sweet, death.
2010-10-15 [Nekko fox]: Let me go get some friends and we can have a luau!


Oh wait...


  

2010-10-16 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-10-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-16 [Nekko fox]:   



2010-10-17 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: Holey heffer in a half cream carton! that one about the man in the bathroom is absolutely hilarious.
2010-10-17 [Nekko fox]: But he did touch your heart...
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: woah, a TON of random pic-toids dude. :P
Like the buddy system one heh heh




*NAI-chat-room*
2010-10-17 [Nekko fox]: *Promptly cudgels Jadala with a vivisected orphan*
2010-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I wasn't finished eating that, jerk! *snatches orphan back*


Oh, great... now it has that Jadala stank on it... *tosses it in the dumpster*...
2010-10-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey you bastard! I was beating someone with perfectly good orphans, and we do NOT waste here! Unless we do. At which point, nevermind.
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *pulls it out of dumpster and stuffs it down Mort's throat* Ha! You jerkwad. Get the 'stank' out now. Bitch.
*dusts hands off*
2010-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-10-17 [Pillowthief]: Great. Now you pissed the gnomes off. You know how long it took us to calm them down last time?!? Like two hours! It wasn't easy on any of us.
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: whats a gnome gonna do? bite my knees?
2010-10-17 [Pillowthief]: Ever see Invader Zim? Think lasers.
2010-10-17 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: never watched invader zim, lasers are nothing.
2010-10-17 [Pillowthief]: Sad. You fail at life.
2010-10-17 [Flisky]: Um...there are gnomes, shooting lazers from their eyes...We could seriously be saving a ton on electric bills if we just use those to cook the food! *points at uncooked orphans still laying around*
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: isnt that the point? *spit roasts a penguin over a fire and adds salt*
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: SANTA :D
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: *sprinkles some pepper on it while its kicking*
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *pokes with a stick* ooh yummy ^_^
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: Oi. *snaps stick and stabs it into your hand* get your own penguin.
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: wahhhhh
2010-10-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-17 [Nekko fox]: I found Jadalas mug picture. I think he killed the cameraman though...


That...that poor man. He was three days away from retirement. He was going to go home and celebrate with a picture of his dead wife and the three kids he ate, AND YOU KILLED HIM!


Good times that...
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: Jadala is a woman... I think the anatomy is slightly off. *munches on a penguin leg.* as for the poor man... his fault for taking a dangerous job.
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Right?
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: And yeah I DO SO HAPPEN to be a rather cute 22 yr old FEMALE.
lol, unless you all know something I don't! o.O
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: *looks over Jadala and nodds* that she is.. cute tush too. Penguin anyone? or would you prefer baby seal?
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *hops up and down* Me! Me! I want some! Meeee!
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: what about the orphans? D: are we ever going to eat fried orphans?
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: if you fry em, they will eat them. *watches Jadala jump with a smirk* leg, wing or breast?
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Breast! ;)
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: WHO ARE THEY? D:
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: The orphans? Don't start asking too many questions now... o.O
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: ... anyone who asks for a fried orphan of course... silly. *grins and slowly slices off the breast of the penguin and hands it Jadala.* thats six please.
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Dollars?
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: I only have buttons =/ can I pay with buttons?
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: Aliz, what are you on about. Jadala, not dollars. *grins*
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: Buttons...? >______>
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: erm....six what then....?
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: why would you pay me buttons, you arent buying anything from me. jadala, whatever you decide to pay in, I want six of.
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: hmmm *contemplates* I shall pay you six severed dolphin tails
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: cool, I can make a nice stew. *munches*
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *noms penguin breast*
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: Maybe I -am- buying something =0
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: O.O *edges away from [Aliz]*
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: well what would you like to buy? ;)
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: Weeell... Jadala's left kidney would be fine =/
But something with strawberry jam and cheese is also fine =/
2010-10-17 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *chokes on penguin*
2010-10-17 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *smacks jadala on the back, probably a lot harder than needed*
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: Omlet? kidney, jam and cheese?
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: Sounds great :D
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: coming right up, do you mind if its not Jadala's?
2010-10-17 [Aliz]: .... maybe =(
2010-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in from the attic above*... I was up in the attic cleaning for 45 minutes, before I realized we didn't even have a frickin' attic! What a waste of time!


...*eats ramen*... *notices people eating penguin*... NNNOOOOO!! That was my unmentioned until just now twin brother, Joe! I was planning on harvesting his liver and lungs, when the Scotch and cigars finished off my current ones! Now I'll have to get some more organs from the homeless like last time... preferably the younger ones... their organs are more succulent... *gets a couple of Uzis off the weapon rack and storms out the door*...
2010-10-17 [Mrs Vicious.]: ...... *blinks a little and puts the penguin liver into the omlet*
2010-10-18 [Pillowthief]: *Burst in the door*
*Yaaaaawn* I... condemn.... you all... *yawn* to hell... and stuff. Cook me some... coffee. *eats news-papers-colored-breakfast-sandwich*
2010-10-18 [Flisky]: *puts some coffee beans in a pan and fries over Mort's engine before tossing them at Pillowthief* There, fried coffee. Sorry, you didn't say how you wanted it cooked.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *manages to swallow penguin*
yum! Thanks!
I'll take fried coffee! *puts a scoop of ice cream in a bowl intending on topping it with the fried coffee*
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: *Shakes himself off after having peed in the coffee. And the frier. And the ice cream. And on the penguin. and the newspaper.












He had a lot to drink. No apologies were given*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *Slaps [Nekko fox] with pee-pee ice cream. Knocks him over. Smashes in his face, pulls out his eyes and hangs them in her car as dice.* Oooh pretty *plays with the dice*
No apologies were given.
2010-10-18 [Flisky]: *pulls out a new Nekko Fox robot from the closet* Hate when that happens.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *GLANCES OVER* ooh a foxy!!! ^^^
*looks around* I guess its back to orphan eating...
*nudges closest orphan with foot*
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: *Meanders in, looking down at the splattered remains of a previous robot which promptly goes on a fritz due to a damaged combat inhibitor. It wrenches the legs off Jadala, which many of the customers ignore, and beats the new Nekko Fox robot with the limbs. Bets are placed on who will win*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *grimaces as her legs regrow* Hate it when that happens.
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: It happens a lot here.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Noticed. On the bright side I can go to NAI-chatroom and get some cocoa and I think they're making Rigatoni and broccoli and cheese fettuccine....
So I can get re-vamped there and come back here to get torn to pieces again. It's a fun system. :P
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: Jesus said the same thing until they carpet bombed Israel.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Huh? o.O
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: Just that
2010-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Carpet bombings got a lot worse when that Aladdin jerk invented the flying carpet.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: lol
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: That was polite laughter. That really wasn't that clever a comment. You can do better Mort, I confess I'm a bit disappointed.
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: If you throw nickels he will perform better. Right now it's just a hobby.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *throws virtual nickles at Mort*
2010-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *opens his mouth to tell a hilarious joke, but chokes on a flying nickel*... *dies violently, like usual*... *eats ramen*...
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Your dead body is eating ramen? LMAO
2010-10-18 [Tekkon KinKreet]: t virus at it's best
2010-10-18 [Pillowthief]: Sweet! Coins! *picks up loose change*


Ahhh, man. Only $2.35? That's not even enough for the bus home...
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: Poor pillow and his buses costing $2.36...
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *chucks [Pillowthief] a penny*
2010-10-18 [Flisky]: *watches as penny lands on the floor, starts rolling on its side, then slips down a drain*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: my bad
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Avlin Circle 4 RP has begun. EVERYONE is invited ^^^
---->AC4 CH 1
2010-10-18 [Mrs Vicious.]: *staples a dollar to pillows forehead." there you go.
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: *Yawns*


Spamming other wikis is bad class.


*Pours himself a beer, farts, scratches his crotch, and spits in the customer's food*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: rofl.


I need to work on my coin throwing. :P
2010-10-18 [Mrs Vicious.]: one bucket of spit, order up! *presses a bell and nods* it kinda is, people could get really annoyed.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *edges away from anything resembling spit up*


2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: *Spits on Jadalas shoe. No reason is given. He then kills all the back-up orphans and devours their livers. The reason is that purple is not that attractive a color, even though none of the orphans are dressed in purple*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *pulls off shoe and shoves it down [Nekko fox]'s throat.*
Dammit now I only got one shoe.
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: *Devours the shoe and the offending hand that held it. Chews with relish, then goes back to devouring orphan livers(
2010-10-18 [Pillowthief]: That was MY shoe!


GRAAAHHHH! The bus only takes coins and now I have to walk home with only ONE SHOE?!? OHHHHH the iirronny.
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: *spits up a chunk of scrap iron*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: erm, that must of hurt...
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: Nah, these things just happen.
2010-10-18 [Mrs Vicious.]: must have been in the shoe.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Maybe it was a horse shoe in disguise?
2010-10-18 [Flisky]: Nah. It was in the livers.
2010-10-18 [Mrs Vicious.]: ... how whas their scrap iron in penguin liver?
2010-10-18 [Flisky]: No. There was scrap iron in the orphan's livers. We naturally shot them all before taking them in.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: And made the bullets out of scrap iron?
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: You are all dense. OBVIOUSLY livers are a natural source of iron. Build up is collected in the stomach and rejected by the body in a mucus-y display and is usually sold as scrap iron because it isn't tempered right. That and the orphans are robots.
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: So...you not only ate iron...you ate a bunch of wires, microchips and various tubes...
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]: Damn straight I did. And all part of a healthy diet!


*chews on one of the customers who promptly starts screaming, bleeding everywhere, and generally being inconsiderate of the other diners. He breaks her neck and continues to chew in the now relative silence*
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Don't forget to lick up the blood. ^_^
2010-10-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-18 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: LMAO *rolls n the floor*
hahahaah
2010-10-18 [Aliz]: Watch out for the mutant thingys down there =|
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *gasp* wha---?
*stands up quickly and shakes* ew. ew. ew. ew.
2010-10-19 [Pillowthief]: I prefer old people, myself. Yes, they might be a little chewy, but they cant move very quick and I sooo hate fast food. Especially since Im half shoeless.
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: *staples a shoe to Pillows head* problem solved.
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: haha. ^_^ Why not eat turtles then? They can be both old and slow!
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: ppppft, nooo turtles are endangered! old people are everywhere.
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: hahaha
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: Niggers eat old people, and not to beat a dead horse or anything, but B'S D, C, BS, CR, and H (Bob's Diner, Catering, Body Shop, Coroner, and Hostel) is a culture friendly restaurant that accepts everyone, no matter what their horrible discoloration.


  

2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Except chinks, because I hate yellow. It's such a tacky color.


  

2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: It is, isn't it?


  

2010-10-19 [Pillowthief]: Quiet Green Lantern and random dude from the Simsons! *rips shoe off of forehead* (Size 9 & 1/2? This does me no good!) *rips shoe in half*




*eats shoe, one half at a time* Yum! Kinda reminds me of old people!
2010-10-19 [Pillowthief]:   
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: haha. DUCK!!! o.O
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: hahahah classic.
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: Well we do, we have the right to wash up and make babies and clean and cook. its wether or not we do it is anyones guess.
2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Shoes are too fattening. That's why I eat Granny's Homegrown Low-Fat Shoes. With only half the fat content of a normal shoe, these shoes are both nutritious and painfully delicious! Now in Berry Boot, Habanero Heel, and Manhandled Sandal!
2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws a Habanero Heel at [Mrs Vicious.]* Get back in that kitchen!
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *stabs mort* get back to the underground holding until its your turn for breeding!
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: *Stabs Jadala* Angry words and related noise meant to express disgust and general dissatisfaction!
2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: It's ALWAYS time for breeding! *grabs a random concubine out of the freezer and starts violently breeding in the soup*
2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *also stabs Pillowthief to fit in*
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: ERM, if it's frozen...how you gonna...?
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: ... dont ask... its better not to, the fact the concubine is dead.. due to being in a freezer kinda freaks me out too but hey, each to their own.
2010-10-19 [Pillowthief]: Gah! Stop stabbing me!!!
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: ... I dont think youve been stabed pillow.
2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: My apologies, sir. *quickly duct tapes the gaping wound in Pillowthief's thorax*


*stabs Misty instead*
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: [Pillowthief] has a thorax? lol
2010-10-19 [Aliz]: *takes pictures for the company's 10th anniversary*
2010-10-19 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *is blinded by flash* GAH My eyes!!!
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: *doesnt show up on film and looks rather bored, throws a stiletto at Pillowthief so it stabs through the shoulder*
2010-10-19 [Aliz]: That's good! Keep that pose! :D *keeps taking pictures*
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: *for most of them all you can see is a shoe heading for the camera.*
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: You can't stab Pillow in the shoulder. Obviously he's an insect now, hence the thorax comment! Sheesh, people are daft.
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: humans have a thorax too, silly. its your rib cage. duh.
2010-10-19 [Aliz]: *puts shoe on fire* =C
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: No, that's insect terminology. The human 'Thorax' is the torso, or, if used with different terminology, the 'trunk'.


*stomps on Pillow's resilient carapace*
2010-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Are... are you gonna eat that carapace?
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: well how come when you have blood cumulate in the plural cavity its called a Hemothorax, not a hemotrunk then? Thorax is the technical term or your neck to your ribcage. its commonly known as a upper torso.
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: *Hands Mort Pillow and makes a noise of disdain for things that are corporeal*
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: *munches on a roast penguin foot* crispy.
2010-10-19 [Flisky]: *steals the thorax and starts making a gumbo*
2010-10-19 [Nekko fox]: *steals the gumbo and starts making Thoraxes*
2010-10-19 [Mrs Vicious.]: *munches happily and sits back*
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: *Burns the refuse created by the little people around*
2010-10-20 [Pillowthief]: Gah! Stop eating me!!!
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Just giving everyone a heads up about it, anon is mobilizing.






  

2010-10-20 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *Rubs eyes* Whats everyone doing?
*see's that dude's face* gah!!!! My eyes!!!!
*his pointing finger blinded her*
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Obviously not you.


*Drinks scotch. Laughs and wrestles a bear, a friendly match for shits and giggleS*
2010-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Th-that's no bear... *points a shaking finger at the massive beast*... it's... MISTY!! *Japanese people start running around screaming, which is apparently standard procedure for giant monster attacks*
2010-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: The comment average for this year is up to 10.34 a day! ...and, yes, it's most likely due to the fact that I am manager again...
2010-10-20 [Mrs Vicious.]: what was with the random Simmons spamming? *casually chews on Nekko.*
2010-10-20 [Pillowthief]: Gah! Stop chewing on-


Wait, that really IS Misty! You shouldn't wrestle her, she'll beat you, than eat you. It's not a pretty sight and our gnomes are starting to complain. *laser cuts Nok in half*
2010-10-20 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *stares at running japanese people* hmmm
*sticks out foot*
wait for it....wait for it...
*A japanese dude trips, causing the crowd behind him to trip as well*
heh heh *a giant sumo guy runs that direction*
uh oh
*the japanese dudes plead for him to watch where he's going* And the finale!!!
*the sumo man trips, falls, and squishes all those unlucky enough to be beneath*
2010-10-20 [Pillowthief]: Wait, that really IS Misty! *laser cuts Jadala*(Once upon a moment) in half*
2010-10-20 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: *stares at running Americunts* Hm.
*sticks out appendage*
Patience...patience...
*An Americunt trips, causing the crowd behind him to tumble as well*
BAHAHA! *a giant,fat Misty runs that direction*
Well, fuck...
*the Americunts scream at him to watch where he's going* And the coup de grace!!!
*Misty trips, falls, and squishes Jadala, Mrs Vicious and Aliz underneath, as a quaint reminder to stay in the kitchen*


2010-10-20 [Pillowthief]: Biootches! Make me a saanndwich.


Actually, that really doesnt sound too bad. *yells at the Puerto Rican that works in Pillowthief's actual kitchen* Make me a saanndwich, biootch!
2010-10-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i want a puerto rican kitchen maid... how much that shit cost? i can use american dollars yah?
2010-10-20 [Pillowthief]: Totally. Just 4 payments of 49.99 and you can have one too!


Orders made payable through Bob's Diner, attention Iszy.
2010-10-20 [Mrs Vicious.]: I think you'll find that Im not an Americunt, Im an Englicunt.
2010-10-20 [Aliz]: *is squished* O_____o
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: It's not Englicunt, it's Eurofag.


Sheesh. Kids these days, think they know everything.
2010-10-20 [Flisky]: *laughs maniacally at the mayhem*
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]:   
  

2010-10-20 [Aliz]: Then... am I a Eurofag too? O_____o;
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]:   
  

  

  

  

2010-10-20 [Mrs Vicious.]: so everyone in Europe is classed as a Eurofag?...classy.
2010-10-20 [Aliz]: Does that include Scandinavia too? =|
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2010-10-20 [Sideways]: I happen to know why there is a brewing social war between Europe and the USA and here is why




Penis Envy.


I know, you're all surprised, wondering what I am getting at. I live in Florida. Florida is America's penis. Florida is busilly nailing a hot, sunny nation by the name of Cuba.


However, Europe has no Penis. At one point, England was Europes proud penis,reaching towards the open vulva of norway and finland, but never made it, freezing off itself near the artic ocean, and, the coup de gras, severed by the english channel.
2010-10-20 [Mrs Vicious.]: so what do you call Sweden then? its alot bigger than Florida and its practically nailing Germany and the rest of Europe. to be honest, the "penis envy" is a load of shit.
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Sweden is in and of itself a proud nation, standing apart from the English grouping of nations just as a teenager will distance himself from his awkward, and socially unacceptable parents. The fact that it's nailing Germany is very much like a redneck guy pounding a black chick even though his parents are very outspoken white supremacists. Sweden is just flaunting its genitalia and sexual prowess in the face of the UK.
2010-10-20 [Mrs Vicious.]: the whole point was the "penis envy" between USA and Europe... Sweden is part of Europe, thus Europe has a penis and its bigger than Florida.
2010-10-20 [Aliz]: Isn't it technically nailing Denmark? >______________>
2010-10-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: they're all nailing each other, its like one big orgy of the nations.
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: A big, incestuous, muddled orgy full of bad food and hairy armpits...


But Though it IS part of Europe, Sweden has already made it clear that is has disowned its family long ago, ergo America still has a bigger penis, though we are still on very friendly terms with Sweden. /b/rofist.
2010-10-20 [Mrs Vicious.]: depends on how you look at it really...
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Nah, that's the reality of it. Also, Russia doesn't like your food either.
2010-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Surprisingly, the Asians have a pretty big penis. India is nailing Sri Lanka.
2010-10-20 [Sideways]: India is the infected nipple of asia, not its penis. And of course, to all of you refuting my point on the part of penis size, It's not how big it is its how you use it and who you use it on. Have fun nailing a seven foot, man-faced swede named Heidi, Europe!


And, as we all know, if anyone is fucking anything on earth, it's the USA. Whether it's fucking over, fucking up, fucking sideways or fucking nuts, its America.
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Here here.
2010-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: There there!
2010-10-20 [Flisky]: Where, where?
2010-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: THERE. THERE.
2010-10-20 [Aliz]: No, over here :D
2010-10-20 [Nekko fox]: God, everyone shut up! Paco is choking on his own vomit again!


*Points at Misty's rotten corpse*
2010-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY GOD!! *quickly runs from the room*... *returns with a video camera*... Sweet! This is going straight to Youtube.
2010-10-21 [Pillowthief]: God Dammit.


We can't charge for Youtube.
2010-10-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: freedom of expression at its finest *shoots freedom of expression* that doesn't belong here....
2010-10-21 [Aliz]: *doesn't see the problem*
2010-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you see, you fool?! ...you're blind!!
2010-10-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *throws a bottle of vizene which stabs point first into aliz's eye* try looking now
2010-10-21 [Aliz]: AH! NOW I....


No... still don't see it =/
2010-10-21 [Nekko fox]: Try this.


*Stabs Aliz in the eye with a baby seal*
2010-10-21 [Aliz]: NOM :D *licks on baby seal*
2010-10-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hmmmm vizene is useless..... *stabs the makers of vizene*
2010-10-21 [Nekko fox]: Baby seals are useless. They also seem to have AIDs more often than not.


*Distances himself from Aliz, whom he has placed into quarantine, and gets all the other customers into hazmat suits. He then fills their hazmat suits with deadly radiation, just because it's cute they way they wiggle*
2010-10-21 [Aliz]: *licks on Nekko fox too* :D
2010-10-21 [Pillowthief]: New on the menu! Radioactive Marine Seals!
On sale! Half price, if they don't kick your ass in the first 15 minutes! Order now!
2010-10-21 [Aliz]: Weren't the customers radioactive? O____o
2010-10-22 [Nekko fox]: Of course! But that doesn't mean our dying customers aren't hungry.


*He smacks Aliz for licking him, getting saliva on his hazmat suit with it's dura-bond sealing*


Goddamn this thing gets warm fast...
2010-10-22 [Aliz]: Hm... I'm glad I'm in quarantine. No radioactive here :D
2010-10-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it, Cthulhu! Get back in the takoyaki! If our Japanese customers ever stop running from Misty, they're going to be very hungry! *smacks [Aliz] with a hot frying pan*
2010-10-22 [Nekko fox]: *the Japanese people eat Aliz*
2010-10-22 [Nekko fox]: *Cthulhu helps them*
2010-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: •̪̀●́
2010-10-23 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: *watches from afar*
2010-10-23 [Nekko fox]: Even when afar you would be driven insane by the sight of the dread god Cthulhu! Him AND his dance partner!
2010-10-23 [Skylark_Nikko]: His dance partner? o.O
2010-10-23 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: noooo!! *covers ears and rocks back and forth*
not there-not there- not there
2010-10-23 [Skylark_Nikko]: HEH HEH SHE'S LOSING IT!!!
2010-10-23 [silverraven66699]: *sighs* Wow Nekko, and I feel less alone now because I found other crazy people to have over for tea... *giggles* Sorry, I have no clue what is going on... lol ^^
2010-10-23 [Nekko fox]: Remember kids and kiddies, friends and vagrants, sloths and abominable snowmen, Bob's Diner is a well-established place of culture, etiquette, finesse, and insanity. Please leave your shame by the door next the dead cockroaches that Mort has been flicking at traffic.
2010-10-23 [Skylark_Nikko]: lol
2010-10-23 [Nekko fox]: *starts flicking cockroaches at Skylark*
2010-10-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *walks in with a bag over his shoulder that is moving slightly* hey mort, got you some more cockroaches *opens bag and turns it over on mort's head*
2010-10-24 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT THE HECK, MAN?! ...these aren't the cockroaches I ordered... I ordered the Madagascar Hissing ones, these are American cockroaches, confound it! They taste AWFUL. TAKE THEM ALL BACK! *hurls the bag angrily at Skylark*
2010-10-24 [Aliz]: *resurrects* :D
2010-10-24 [Pillowthief]: *Was not aware [Aliz] was dead. Or maybe didn't care enough to notice*


Who cars about notices anyways? *takes down the usual eviction notice from outside and puts it with the others* Until they write them in Hebrew IM NOT CARING!*


...


באמת לא ידעתי [Aliz] מת אף.
2010-10-24 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: lol poor skylark
2010-10-24 [Skylark_Nikko]: gah! *topples over*
2010-10-24 [Nekko fox]:
*stands triumphantly over skylark*


I claim this kill!


*shoots Misty's rotting, decayed, blubberous corpse to prove his point*
2010-10-24 [Aliz]: Actually, I didn't notice I was dead either at first =|


Men det spiller ingen rolle [Pillowthief] ^.^
2010-10-24 [Mrs Vicious.]: ...wow.
2010-10-24 [Nekko fox]: Don't be hatin'.
2010-10-25 [Pillowthief]: *Doesn't notice- not in Hebrew*
2010-10-25 [Skylark_Nikko]: *looks up* yikes!
2010-10-25 [Nekko fox]:
SIT. THE FUCK. DOWN.


  





Now please resume your paranoid terror.
2010-10-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-25 [Pillowthief]: Spyro the dragon. Beloved offspring of a Spy and a Pyro.


Ha ha, Team Fortress humor, at its best.
2010-10-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-25 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: lol
2010-10-25 [Nekko fox]: QUIET YOU!


*Backhands Jadala with Misty's rotting femur before fermenting it and selling it to middle schoolers as some form of hip new drug. Emphasis on hip. Because it was fermented femur. Fuck you all.*
2010-10-25 [Mrs Vicious.]: wow,this shits bout as original as my grandma's farts.
2010-10-25 [Nekko fox]: Which are quite original. Try Grandma's Farts, the one and only commercial brand flatulence filled with all the wholesome nutrients expelled by the elderly!
2010-10-25 [Nekko fox]: And besides, aren't you supposed to be sitting at the kiddie table?
2010-10-25 [Mrs Vicious.]: id be sat at the kiddie table if you weren't taking up the whole thing. that and Im no kid, her farts had been going for 83 years... that aint original.
2010-10-26 [Nekko fox]: *Stomps his foot down on the kiddie table, obliterating the meals of several crying children*


Are you daft? Of course it's original! She's aiming for the world record for farting! She's had one consistent fart for eight years now! No one has EVER thought of trying that!
2010-10-26 [Pillowthief]: He does have a point.
2010-10-26 [Nekko fox]: Oh, and we just got some fresh fruit that has been genetically modified to fight off encroaching animals.


  



*Feeds it the the newfags which in turn eats it's way back out again
2010-10-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: ooooooooooooooooh i want one
2010-10-26 [Nekko fox]: *throws Tekkon some biscuits filled with mice*
2010-10-27 [Araglas]: O.o Wow...
2010-10-27 [Pillowthief]: They're alright, but they still don't beat our Kids In A Blanket.
  

2010-10-27 [Nekko fox]: Nah, just EAT THE KIDS IN A BLANKET!


  

2010-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course not. Nothing beats our Kids In A Blanket! ...except me. *takes a baseball bat and a couple of kids into a back room*
2010-10-27 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i wanted a newfag... not a biscuit... duh. btw... KIRBY SAYS DANCE BITCHES!!!!!!!! <(-_-<) <(-_-^) <(^_^)> (^-_-)> (>-_-)>
2010-10-27 [Nekko fox]: *Screams in terror and violently begins beating the Kirby dancers with a fire extinguisher before breaking down into hopeless sobbing whilst wiping blood and Kirby-matter off of himself*


Whew, all better.
2010-10-27 [Nekko fox]: *drinks some coffee and relaxes*


  



Y'all jealous?
2010-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Th-there's someone at the door for you...


  

2010-10-27 [Flisky]: WTF? Predator Kirby?
2010-10-27 [Nekko fox]: I ATTACK WITH COUNTER KIRBY!


  

2010-10-28 [Pillowthief]: I counter with a Sneak Kirby from behind! *Kirby eats opposing caster*


  

2010-10-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-28 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-10-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-29 [Tekkon KinKreet]: SCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORRRRRRRRRRRE poorly-drawn-stick-woman-with-huge-boobs for the win. (best kirbies i've ever seen)
2010-10-29 [Pillowthief]: Close, but fail.
2010-10-29 [Nekko fox]: What? They're round!-Ish! Kirby is round-ish! They're pink! He's pink! Street urchins draw both tits AND Kirby! Coincidence? I THINK NOT! Though honestly I don't know.


*Starts cooking Creme De Kirby*
2010-10-29 [Pillowthief]: True, but you actually have to put yourself in the persona and viewpoint of Leonardo Dicrapio, therefor, fail.
2010-10-29 [Nekko fox]: Hey, racism is just a form of cultural bias.


And besides, the only real failures are the orphans.
2010-10-29 [Aliz]: Didn't we cook them? =/
2010-10-29 [Pillowthief]: The good thing about orphans is...


There's always some new parents abandoning them!
2010-10-29 [~Spirit Fox~]: XD Oh wow. Another wiki of randomness. Ellos Aliz.
2010-10-29 [Pillowthief]: You were adopted.
2010-10-30 [Nekko fox]: The orphans?
2010-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Randomness?! RANDOMNESS?!! *punches Nok in the hooters* Here at Bob's Diner, we believe in controlled chaos, not randomness.
2010-10-30 [Tekkon KinKreet]: you have to quit cooking the orphans... at least the twelve year olds. i'm going to take them all and feed them nothing but m&m's and mountain dew and take over the world with an army of sugar crazed super soldiers        BWAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
2010-10-30 [Pillowthief]: *zombies slowly eat the army of screaming sugar crazed twelve year olds*


Rule Number One: Cardio.
2010-10-30 [Nekko fox]: Rule number shut the hell up: niggers always did it.
2010-10-30 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-31 [Aliz]: God looks like a marshmellow? =0
2010-10-31 [Olwen]: God looks like a child stealer.... :s
2010-10-31 [Tekkon KinKreet]: pedoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo... that Ethiopian kid is in trouble man....
2010-10-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-10-31 [Nekko fox]: HEY GUYS! I just saw Misty at a comedy club the other night...


  

2010-11-02 [Araglas]: sad sad liuttle penguine
2010-11-02 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from the morose penguin he is stuffing full of pixies for Thanksgiving*


What about him? Penguins can't feel pain, just like orphans, Paco, women, and most species of dust mites.
2010-11-03 [Flisky]: Yeah. And men can feel pain but don't know what it is. *whispers to no one* It's because of the lower brain function.
2010-11-03 [Nekko fox]: *Shoots Flisk through her temporal lobe*


Actually, men just ignore it because we're so manly. Just look at Mort over their.


*Indicates the urine drenched figure huddled in the corner, crying in his sleep and hugging a bottle of whiskey*
2010-11-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, I did fight Chuck Norris, and it was a very bloody horrific battle between me and him, but unfortunately, I lost the battle... but the war is not over yet!   
2010-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: GET AWAY FROM MY WHISKEY. *breaks an empty bottle over Misty's head*... *returns to his urine soaked corner*...
2010-11-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: EW! What's wrong with you? You normally sit in the crap corner.
2010-11-03 [Aliz]: Maybe they turned it into a urine-crap corner?
2010-11-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Maybe.
2010-11-04 [Araglas]: *is whittling a small figurine of Misty fighting Chuck Norris*
2010-11-04 [Nekko fox]: *is dreamily drawing Colonel Sanders*


  

2010-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! O_O
2010-11-04 [Nekko fox]: *Watches as the Colonel promptly beats Misty with his fists, despite any prowess her hambeast powers may have granted her, and sells her to foreign villages as discount food for the needy and under-privileged. The third-world countries citizens start dying of cholesterol clogging their arteries*
2010-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: That was a clone! BWHAHAHAHAHA!
2010-11-04 [Flisky]: *has just seen Nekko's response to her previous statement and laughs at the obvious mistake in the middle...but drools on the table due to a lack of temporal lobe*
2010-11-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2010-11-05 [Nekko fox]: Hey, shut up hambeast. Who let you off your chain anyway?


*Leads Misty back to her corner so she can entertain the guests while chained to a wall. He then feeds Flisk to her on a whim*
2010-11-05 [Flisky]: *gives Misty indigestion, comes back as a ghost*
2010-11-05 [Nekko fox]: Who we gonna call?


GHOSTBUSTERS!
2010-11-05 [Flisky]: *inhabits a new host body, drives old soul out* Look! A ghost! *points at old soul*
2010-11-05 [Aliz]: *eats old soul* :D
2010-11-06 [Nekko fox]: Ewww....those are stale...
2010-11-06 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-11-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-11-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: YAY FOR THE CHAINSAW! *steals and cuts my chain*
2010-11-06 [Nekko fox]: *the chainsaw rebels against its new master, sawing instead through layers of Misty's fat, muscle, fat, meat, bone and fat. But, mostly just layers and layers of thick body hair*
2010-11-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sneezes*
2010-11-06 [Pillowthief]: *couch*
2010-11-06 [Nekko fox]: INFECTION!


*Burns down the section of the diner Misty was residing in, fueling the fire with some of the food they kept in the dumpster out back*
2010-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Now all that's left is three bathrooms and a freezer... *starts grilling some burgers in the bathroom*... *replaces the soap in the soap dispensers with various condiments*...
2010-11-06 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko washes his hands. It smells like mustard and lilac. He is pleased until the rats attack him and chew through his ankles*
2010-11-07 [Pillowthief]: I dont think those are rats. They kinda look like opossums...
2010-11-07 [Araglas]: Hey! Those are my Chinchillas!
2010-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a bite out of one*... no, no... these are definitely opossums. With a subtle hint of lime...
2010-11-07 [Nekko fox]: OH SWEET CHRIST MY ANKLES!
2010-11-07 [Flisky]: *pauses in her lime-squirting endeavorer* Mort, I thought you would never notice. *continues covering wildlife with lime*
2010-11-07 [Nekko fox]: OH SWEET CHRIST, LIME JUICE IN MY ANKLES!
2010-11-07 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY GOD!!! SOMEONE NEEDS TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT THAT!! ...*steps over Nekko and changes the clock on the wall an hour back*... there we go! ...*tries to step back over, but trips on what little remains of Nekko's ankles*... DAMN FLOOR TABLES! *violently kicks Nekko's ribs*
2010-11-08 [Araglas]: *walks around stumbling with a charred rat tail hanging out of his mouth*
2010-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a bite out of [Araglas]'s face*... no, no... this is definitely an opossum tail. With a subtle hint of lime... and face...
2010-11-08 [Flisky]: *squirts [Araglas] with more lime*
2010-11-08 [Ninja Smurf]: *squirts [Flisky] with more of [Araglas]'s face* hmm, now what can I add....?
2010-11-08 [Flisky]: *looses lunch all over [Ninja Smurf]*
2010-11-08 [Araglas]: *walks in and see's clone* DAMNIT MORT! Do you know how much a good clone costs these days?! They cost one bowl of ramen! Do you know how much that is!?
2010-11-08 [Pillowthief]:


$0.10?


  

2010-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, I'm sorry! It actually costs $37,000 (here at B's D). However, since you're the only one who submitted a guess, you win! Come on up and spin the wheel! *points at a hubcap duct taped to the fridge*
2010-11-08 [Araglas]: ......*shoots clone and throws it int he kitchen to be butchered with the zombies*
2010-11-08 [Nekko fox]: *screams from his prone position on the floor, protecting the poor dust bunnies from the evil vacuum lords of Norath*


ACCORDING TO OUR MENU IT'S FREE FOR MORT, TEN BUCKS FOR EVERYONE ELSE, OR ¥800.00. AND I'M NOT EVEN SURE HOW WE DO CURRENCY EXCHANGE HERE.
2010-11-08 [Aliz]: Does that mean I can't use Euro here? D:
2010-11-08 [Nekko fox]: Of course you can! Just dump all of your money into this bin next to the register.
2010-11-08 [Aliz]: I... think I'll rather use the bank across the street =|
2010-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, yes. Bob's Bank. Excellent choice. Just put your money in the bin next to the register.
2010-11-09 [Nekko fox]: *Takes all of Aliz's money and throws it into the bin beside the register with the label "Feed the Rich Foundation"*
2010-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *chortles into a glass of wine*... excellent! More money! *tosses the cash into the fireplace*... it was really getting chilly in here... and that darned firewood is just too heavy to lift! I would just turn off the AC, but it's way on the other side of the room... *tosses more money into the fire*... *hurls a piece of firewood at Tiny Tim*... damn boy! I told you to get out of here! No Christmas goose for you this year!! *tosses the goose into the fireplace*
2010-11-09 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses Tiny Tim into the fireplace as well and warms his hands over the crackling, and screaming, flames*
2010-11-09 [Aliz]: My money isn't worth that much =] it's ok xD
2010-11-09 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *takes a piece of firewood and whats left of Aliz's money when no one is looking*
2010-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I saw that! *points at Tekkon*
2010-11-09 [Tekkon KinKreet]: whaaaaaa?
2010-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: I saw you pick your nose just now!
2010-11-09 [Nekko fox]: *Uses Tekkons boogers and Misty as a fuel source. The snot does nothing. Misty warms the diner for eons*
2010-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh ha ha very funny. *rolls eyes*
2010-11-09 [Flisky]: *squirts lime on the fire, giving the air a nice citrus smell*
2010-11-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yum! I love citrus! *sniffs the air from beside Flisk girl*
2010-11-09 [Tekkon KinKreet]: my boogers are losers..... AWESOME!
2010-11-09 [Nekko fox]: HEY! Quit qalking around while your on fire Misty, what are you, stupid?


*Realizes this question is redundant*
2010-11-09 [Aliz]: *steals someone's hat* please... give me some money ;____;
2010-11-09 [Nekko fox]: *Starts cutting flank steaks from Misty's enormous, flaming girth and puts them in Aliz's newfound hat*
2010-11-09 [Aliz]: Thank you :D Now I can go to Bob's bank with my savings :D
2010-11-10 [Araglas]: Hey is this worth anything? *holds up a giant golden statue of Misty*
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: Nah, that's just some rubbish we use to brighten up the tables of the holier patrons. Something about false Gods and idol worship, nonsense like that.
2010-11-10 [Araglas]: *tosses it aside and picks up a siler statue of Nekko* what about this one?
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: Actually that's my award for being a tiny silver statue.


*The tiny silver statue takes itself away from Aliz and walks off with itself*


Bob damn it, not again...
2010-11-10 [Araglas]: And this one? *giant medal made of bronze with Morts name on it and a bowl of ramen* I doubt it but I thought I would ask...
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: Oh, that's just Mort pretending to be a bronze statue. He does that every now and then. He uses it to catch diseases.
2010-11-10 [Araglas]: *tosses it into the furnace* Oh well...hmmm...*pulls a giant peacock made of diamonds* This is...weird...
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: *Throws the bird into the furnace beside Mort* Ugh, damn things keep getting in here...
2010-11-10 [Tekkon KinKreet]: this place is like.. a depository for false idols... i can has?
2010-11-10 God:
YOU CAN NOT HAS!
2010-11-10 [Pillowthief]: You tell 'em God!


By the way, have you seen your son lately? He borrowed some movies from me and I kinda want them back and stuff. Dogma, especially.
2010-11-10 [Aliz]: *collects idols* Off to the bank :D
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: *Aliz is promptly struck by angry lightning bolts flung by a petty, jealous God*


Oooh, looks like we know what is for dinner!
2010-11-10 [Tekkon KinKreet]: god shot me down.... wow.... i feel special... also on a side not, your son also borrowed my movie "Cythia's all girl pussy parade" and i've been feeling kinda lonely lately... soooooo yaaaaaaaaa.... see if you can get that back...
2010-11-10 [Aliz]: *resurrects* :D
Too bad I made a deal with somebody else God :D
2010-11-10 [Flisky]: *slaps Aliz* What did I tell you about messing with my God!
2010-11-10 [Aliz]: *wiggles eyebrows*
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: *Slaps Aliz's eyebrows* What did I tell you about messing with my forehead?
2010-11-10 [Aliz]: But it looked so good ;____;
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: NEVER! *Begins cudgeling the offensive eyebrows with flaming chunks of Misty fat*
2010-11-10 [Aliz]: *eyebrows hides under the bed*
2010-11-10 [Nekko fox]: *Chases after them, swinging the incendiary meat back and forth, setting ablaze the occasional random customer and drug dealer*
2010-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort and his two friends step out of the fiery furnace, completely unharmed*... It was our faith in the Lord that delivered us from the flames. Is that not right, guys? *Meshach nods* And what saith you, Abednego? ...Abednego?! *looks around*... *Abednego is still burning in the fireplace*... aw, sh*t.
2010-11-10 [Aliz]: YAY :D *sits by fireplace*
2010-11-11 [Nekko fox]: `*Pushes Aliz in to keep Abegnego company. He is, after all, loosely related to Paco, and we simply MUST treat family well*
2010-11-11 [Aliz]: *catches fire, runs out of fireplace and puts other random things and people on fire too* :D
2010-11-11 [Pillowthief]: (resists the urge to beat [Aliz] to death "in order to put out the flames")
2010-11-11 [Flisky]: *doesn't resist urge and does beat Aliz to death*
2010-11-11 [Aliz]: It's ok... now everything else is on fire too :D
2010-11-11 [Nekko fox]: *Beats everything else to death to*
2010-11-13 [Nekko fox]: *Dives out of a pile of rubble holding a newspaper scrap*


HOLY SHIT GUYS! MISTY REALLY IS DEAD!


  

2010-11-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not dead, I'm in Washington. (The state not the US capitol.)
2010-11-15 [Nekko fox]: HOLY SHIT! SHE'S A GHOST!


So who you gonna call?


.
.
.
.
.
.


TAPS!
2010-11-15 [Aliz]: ME! :D
2010-11-15 [Skylark_Nikko]: NAZIS!!!!!! GAHAHJA
2010-11-16 [Flisky]: TAPS will only prove that she's a ghost. We need an exorcism.
2010-11-16 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: hmm so a priest then?
2010-11-16 [Nekko fox]: Anybody who comes here and knows a priest will most assuredly be filling that priests confessional every Sunday. That is to say if any of you Godless heathen's even believe in God. And right after her told Aliz to leave those damned fine statues alone.
2010-11-16 [Aliz]: I sorta know the local priests :D
2010-11-16 [Tekkon KinKreet]: 


i agree boys... rope is for hanging with. good idea.
2010-11-16 [Pillowthief]: Weird. I just use it to hang.


Maybe that's why nobody hangs out with me. :(
2010-11-16 [Nekko fox]: We don't hang out with you Pillow, we just hang you.
2010-11-16 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: г๏ςк ภ г๏ll!!!!!
2010-11-16 [Nekko fox]:








Ȋ̛̲̼͖̖͖̾̈́ͥ̏̑̀ͣͭͫ̓̆ͮ̅̏̐̕͞ ̢ͬ̑͛ͯ̏͠҉̦̩͎̗̲̭͉̭̖̖̞̺̫̖̣̥̳͜ç̴̘̻̜͍̬̭̥͓̜͓ͧ̏̇̿ͤ̈͌ͣ͊̋̊ͫͩ̀͌ͮ̍̾å̴̂͂ͯͩͣ͑̽̿͛ͥ̐ͪ̑̈ͫ̊҉͠͞͏͉̝̘̳̥̯͓͓̠n̶̙͓̖͓̼̤͈͔̊̽̿̐͆ͮ̒ͩ̃͆ͬͦͣ͒ͮ͜͜͟ ̺͇͍͖͕̱̣͎̦̃ͧ̽̍̿̇ͪͧ̓̊̇ͩͣ̊́͠w̴̡̤̳̞̖̮̪̤͇̳̱ͩ͂ͫ̎͆ͯ͋̂ͪ́ͪ̕r̸̴̸̜͕̜̣̬͈̳̱̮̘̜͚̹̗̙͑̓̽͑ͫ́ͦ̈ͬ̊̓͊ͣͅiͫͥͬ͂̾͘͟͏̧̨͎̩̗̤͓̯̳̞̭̪͙̭t̸͔̺̮̤̣͇͚̬̽͑͋̀̎͊̅̀͞ȩ̶̰͕͎̹̝̬͎̪̠ͥ̔̉ͭͧ͗̓̽̒͌̅ͮ̆̄ͯͪͣ̚͡ ̤̖͕̮̳̜̳̻͈̱̙̞͎͕̳̙͔͋ͮ̃ͬ̅̐ͧͩ͐ͦͨ̀͟͜w̷̷̴̤͓̹̙̭̜̮̜ͥ͗ͬͥ͐ͣ͒ͧ̃̇̿̐̽ͬ̌̀e̴̡̘͇͉̟͍̱͖ͩ̋͊ͧ̈́ͭ͊͑̀i̵̦̠͖̮̻̭̮̜̬͕̰̒̄ͣ͛̐̔̄ͮ̇͛̊̀͟r̡̛͉̰̪͖̤̟̩̝̹̼̩̭̼̱̳̖͈̥͊ͣ̇̎̍̃̈ͯ̒ͬͭ͑ͣͯ̋́͡d̶̴ͮͪͧ̇̈ͧ͒ͧ̏́̋̃͏̱̪̰̺̮̯̖̝̥ͅ ̍̓͋͆͛͛ͣͣ̂̔̾͞҉̴̡̦͓̞̘̥͍͖̰̱͖̘̟̮ͅl͌͛̉̾͐͆̅ͣ́ͨ̇͛̊̔ͭ͏̡͖̼̼̳̠̦̻͍̤͚͔͖͉͖͘͞ë̡̼̝̱̫͇̮ͪ̿̇̅ͣ̅̿͟͢͢͠ͅţ̵̷̦̯̺͙̮̙ͭͦ͊̅ͦ͛͑͂͛͊̈ͥͥ͊̚͞ͅt̔͆ͩ̃́͗̅ͤ͏҉҉͔̪̺̳͇̮̰̬̭͚̳̹͙̟̥̻̤̠̀́ẽ̸̢̛̗͍̰̬̼͕̭̲̙͔̐̓͌̇͋̋̕͡ṛ̴̨͍͕͕̻̝̩̳̗̖̤͙͎̯̤̲͓͂̃ͭ̾ͤ̊̐͛͑̊ͫ͛ͧ̃̄̓͛̀͝s̩̗̝̦̰̗̘ͩ̃͊̿͊̅ͤ̀͒̍͗̐͛̍͠͞ͅ ̯͈͉̜̦̘̫̰͖̝̹̩̦̪̯̮̩̐̓ͥ̓̔͋̇̉̏̓͊̓̋ͬͩ͆̌͟͠͡ͅt̸͖̰̥̥͎̜̭̭̖̖̭̣̪̥̻̩̥̫͐̿ͫ̆̀̾̏̎̒ͬ̿͒̅̄͋ͬ̀̕͘͢ͅȍ̴̼͔̩͍͖͉̲̜͐̊̀͒ͯ̈́ͨͮͪ̚͡ō̷̸̧͍̟͓̞̦̙͓͈̰͕̍̀ͩ̀ͅ.̢̫̼͎̰̝̝͖̙̹̹̭̟͈͓͙̤ͮ̄̈̔̃ͤ̾͑͗̕.͈̮̠͓̉̿̓̑͛̔ͣͯ͆ͫ͊ͨ̀̚.̫͔̩͈̍ͤͫ͆̓ͩ͛̀͟͞͝
̨͍̜̯̦͇͙̤ͫ̐̿ͤ̎ͬ̓̓ͧ͟
















2010-11-16 [Aliz]: ååååååååååååååå :D
2010-11-16 [Nekko fox]: ˙ʇsodɹoop ɐ sı ɹǝɥʇoɯ ɹnoʎ ןןǝʍ 'ɥɐǝʎ
2010-11-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-11-16 [Aliz]: Or just get a lock on your door T______T
2010-11-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: So I was doin' this chick, right?
2010-11-20 [Flisky]: Mort, you do know that bestiality is a sin, right?
2010-11-20 [Nekko fox]: That poor chick...
2010-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: So is rape and murder, but that's never stopped me!


But yeah, the mother hen wasn't at all pleased. She gave me a rigorous pecking (if you know what I mean).
2010-11-21 [Flisky]: I think we all know what you mean...
2010-11-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2010-11-22 [Nekko fox]: Shut up you indiscernible ball of fat and flesh.


*Backhands Flisk*


*Backhands Misty as an afterthought, then starts screaming as her pudge starts enveloping his arm*
2010-11-22 [Aliz]: *sends in group of tourists* :D
2010-11-22 [Flisky]: *laughs insanely as Nekko's plan obviously backfired, pulls out flame thrower to melt Misty's enveloping fat rolls*
2010-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That isn't going to work. *pulls out his Misty guidebook* According to this, we need to distract the pudge from the arm by offering it something more enticing. *grabs one of the tourists and tosses him in Misty's direction*... *the pudge releases the arm and engulfs the screaming tourist, absorbing him and adding to its own mass*...
2010-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Paco! Quarantine that side of the building!


*Paco sets up 5 "wet floor" signs around Misty*... *the bones of the tourist begin snapping and cracking loudly as they are absorbed*... *business continues as usual*...
2010-11-22 [Flisky]: *starts thing on fire anyway, just for the hell of it*
2010-11-22 [Nekko fox]: *Walks in to see a robot clone of his clutching it's arm, sobbing in terror and wetting itself*


What disgrace is this?!


*throws the robot clone into Misty's enveloping rolls of death and pudge*
2010-11-22 [Aliz]: *takes pictures with tourists* :D
2010-11-22 [Nekko fox]: *Throws the pictures to the burbling cauldron of fat that is Misty's body, and then, as an after thought, shoots one of the tourists so that they have something to cook later*
2010-11-22 [Aliz]: Wouldn't it be better to rob them? D:
2010-11-22 [Nekko fox]: Quiet Aliz!


*throws Aliz onto Misty's ever-hungry pudge folds*
2010-11-22 [Aliz]: *holds on to a table*
2010-11-23 [Nekko fox]: *throws table into the Pudge Beast, Aliz riding coach*
2010-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNOOOO!! *leaps in front of the table, stopping it before being destroyed*... What are you doing?! ...there's tip money on this table!! *scoops it up and tosses Aliz and the table over his shoulder into the mouth of the beast*
2010-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *notices an old woman staring in horror*... Aw, sh*t. Witness! *snaps the woman's neck and feeds her to the Beast*... oh, wait... we weren't trying to cover this up...
2010-11-23 [Nekko fox]: *Is busy filming it*


Cover what up?
2010-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! YOU THERE! *points at Nekko*... could you pass me the salt? ...this slug is pissing me off... *slug flips me off*... ah, you rat bastard.
2010-11-23 [Nekko fox]: *Pours sugar on the snail, having never learned how to read ever since his family died in the...incident*
2010-11-23 [Aliz]: Eat it!
2010-11-23 [Flisky]: *stares at the blob where Aliz is struggling for life, starts Aliz, the table, and the blob on fire*
2010-11-23 [Aliz]: Oh, but we were eaten by a beast :D
2010-11-23 [Flisky]: *just starts everything on fire* It really does look better that way.
2010-11-23 [Nekko fox]: *Starts roasting chestnuts on the open fire*
2010-11-23 [Aliz]: That's not what you said the last time everything was put on fire =C
2010-11-24 [Nekko fox]: *Roasts Flisk on the open fire*
2010-11-24 [Flisky]: *is fireproof and dances in the flames*
2010-11-24 [Nekko fox]: Well, while the cannabis smoker is waiting for her fire retardency to wear off, I present this to you. Misty's skinny little brother. He stopped off for a light snack before he came to the restaurant.


  

2010-11-24 [foxyvixen17]: *snickers* Oh Nekko your the king of funny shit
2010-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: *walks in from the cold* OH NO! HE ATE MY BROTHER! THAT CRAZY MOTHER FUCKER!
2010-11-24 [Nekko fox]: Oh Misty, can you not read? Your brother ate the formerly obese man in order to gain his wisdom. And his nutrients. Didn't know you were related to black people though. How does your incestuous, redneck herp-a-derp family manage all your guilt? Especially after his latest bike theft.


  

2010-11-24 [Nekko fox]: Poor guy JUST made that bike and what does your brother do? He jacks it. Of course.
2010-11-24 [Aliz]: It should've been a motor bike =|
2010-11-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-11-24 [Flisky]:   
2010-11-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-11-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: My brother's not black, but I have black cousins.
2010-11-25 [Nekko fox]: I know, one of them was an astronaut.


  

2010-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Lol sounds like my cousin Jimmy.
2010-11-27 [Nekko fox]: I found that they made statue of one of your cousins heads.


  

2010-11-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: Eddie Murphy isn't my cousin.
2010-11-28 [Nekko fox]: Nah, just a clever likeness.
2010-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: They all look the same anyway.
2010-11-28 [Aliz]: ...the Eddie Murphies? XD
2010-11-28 [Nekko fox]: No no, Misty's family. The fat redneck incest-oriented crazy people. Found one of their family photos just the other day.


*Hangs it in the diner to scare away roaches*


  

2010-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Years later, he would burn Disney World to the ground and (somewhat) change sexes and his name to "Misty".
2010-11-29 [Nekko fox]: I think you've got the time stream confused there Mort.
2010-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE A CIGARETTE.
2010-11-29 [Nekko fox]: And?


  

2010-11-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol Nice.
2010-11-29 [Nekko fox]: *Bitch slaps Misty with one of the screaming orphans, who is promptly swallowed into her odorous rolls*


Quiet you Goofy-enabling witch!
2010-11-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not a witch!
2010-11-30 [Nekko fox]: LIAR! I saw you dancing in the woods with your incestuous kin, singing songs in your witch language, to witch gods, around a witch fire, boiling a witch brew, and drinking witch drinks, and roasting witch wieners (now available only at BOB'S DINER!), and cursing other witches with your witch powers! Your denial only substantiates your guilt!
2010-12-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Witch language/Hebrew... same difference. There's only one way to determine if she's a witch. Stab her in the heart with a silver bullet and put her into a garlic soup. If she survives, she's clearly a witch. If she doesn't, throw the soup out, because it calls for witch, not gorilla. In either case, table three needs more croutons and table five is on fire... *rummages through the cash register*...
2010-12-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: That was just my family reunion, my family is insane, I could've told you that.
2010-12-01 [Nekko fox]:   



I put a fire retardant cloth on table number...


Wait...


*Pulls out the empty FIRE RETARD blanket packaging, nearly indistinguishable from the the Fire Retardant cloth package (normally orange) what with it being a flamboyant green*


Well, I'll be. I guess we ran out of croutons.


*starts dicing up Misty and turning her into croutons*
2010-12-02 [foxyvixen17]: Wow just wow
2010-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: HEY! Croutons are bread, I'm not bread. *smacks Nekko with a giant fish*
2010-12-02 [Nekko fox]: HEY! Quit hitting me with croutons you witch!


*Turns the fish into croutons just to be spiteful. Then he continues making Misty into a croutons with a high fat content*
2010-12-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs as I disappear into smoke*
2010-12-02 [Nekko fox]: *Pulls you out of the smoke*


Don't be stupid. Why do you think we stopped paying for the alarms?


*Continues with the croutoning*
2010-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: The fire has spread to table six now and reports of casualties are coming in by the th- WHAT ARE YOU DOING? I SAID CRAYONS, NOT CROUTONS, DAMN IT! *smacks [foxyvixen17] upside the head and takes her wallet* ONLY TWO CREDIT CARDS?! *pushes [foxyvixen17] into the raging tri-table fire*
2010-12-02 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses Misty in with her so they can be smoke together*
2010-12-02 [Flisky]: *watches the insanity while sipping her coffee...then realizes her coffee has legs and is trying to crawl away* Damn coffee.
2010-12-02 [Nekko fox]: *Smacks the coffee with a broom handle*


Damn it Leonard, get back to serving the less fortunate with these free samples


*Balances a plate of broken glass on Leonard and nudges him towards the front door*
2010-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: And take this map with the quickest routes to all the nearby playgrounds. Children love free samples!
2010-12-02 [Mortified Penguin]: (random comment for experimental purposes)
2010-12-02 [Aliz]: *takes notes*
2010-12-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sneezes for I am allergic to bull shit*
2010-12-03 [Nekko fox]: *Takes a picture of Misty's reaction*


  

2010-12-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: ButtHurt?
2010-12-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: What does that mean?
2010-12-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok then.
2010-12-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I love them.
2010-12-04 [Nekko fox]: Snowball puppy does too.


  

2010-12-04 [Nekko fox]: Now we shall make delicious baked goods with the puppy.


  

2010-12-04 [Thunder Cid]: I love muffins


  

2010-12-04 [Thunder Cid]:   


How come this place has only 9 fans?
2010-12-04 [Nekko fox]: Simple.


  





















OH SHIT, MY CAR!


*starts throwing orphans onto the blaze to hopefully put it out, all the while shaking his fist dramatically at the burning, bloody guy staggering off*


Damn it, I trusted you!
2010-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Because it's not warm enough for 10?
2010-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what you get for trusting the Irish!
2010-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: T-t-t-testicles! No, seriously. Get your testicles out of my coffee.
2010-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: And I ordered the cooked sushi, not coffee, damn it!
2010-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: And for that matter, I didn't even order the cooked sushi! GOOD DAY, SIR. *storms into the closet and slams the door*
2010-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: THIS ISN'T MY CAR! *punches a can of soup in the dark*
2010-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts out of the closet wearing somebody else's coat*... *gets into Nekko's flaming cop car and drives recklessly away, taking out two girl scouts, a pigeon, and a Japanese businessman before driving off a bridge*
2010-12-04 [Nekko fox]: MY SAMOAS!
2010-12-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: damn... he missed the jewish dudes going to the rabbi convention.... and i had a bet going.
2010-12-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-12-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: AH! TOO MUCH HAIR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2010-12-08 [Nekko fox]: Hey, don't talk about your daddy's daddy that way!
2010-12-08 [Tekkon KinKreet]: isnt he her cousin also? this is why i never go to kentucky reunions... i can never keep track of who's who.
2010-12-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: My grandfather doesn't look like that!
2010-12-09 [Nekko fox]: YOU FORGOT HOW YOUR OWN GRANDFATHER LOOKS?! Misty, you... you MONSTER! How could your forgot your dear, sweet, Santa Claus-esque homosexual grandfather?
2010-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Homosexual? No, no. He's straight. That picture you see up there is of Misty and her grandfather. Her unnaturally hairy legs are probably what threw you off.
2010-12-09 [Pillowthief]:
  

2010-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-12-09 [Pillowthief]:
  

That's a nice way of saying you're a slut. Just saying.
2010-12-09 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-12-09 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-09 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-09 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2010-12-09 [twitchboy]: ^ care bear looks like kid from tail spin
2010-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I found some pictures of Misty.


  



  

2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm starting to think we don't have conversations here anymore.


  



  

2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-10 [Pillowthief]: *squee!*


I haven't seen NNY comics for a while. It reminds me that I haven't painted my wall in quite some time.


WITH YOUR BLOOD.
2010-12-10 [Pillowthief]: And Im still a bit confused with the IQ thingy. I have a 124- does this mean Im smart, or REALLY smart (if I was a black dude)?
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]:   



  




  

2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: I took that same IQ test. I got one question more than you right, but, since I'm younger, that one question bumped my IQ up to 144! Suck it! As long as I can stop aging, my IQ will never diminish!
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *ages slightly* Ah, dammit.
2010-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: How strange...
2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *laughs*
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2010-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-10 [Pillowthief]: Fucking Twit bird thing. *crunches Misty1's eye, that was suspiciously still lying on the floor*


Who the hell was eating Misty1's eyes?
2010-12-10 [Pillowthief]: Oh. It was the weird foxy guy. Sorry 'bout that mate.
2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]: Hey, I blame Satan.
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Don't blame me! I was in the basement the whole time, selling glass to children. They'll eat anything that shines.
2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]: Niggers do to, so what's your point?
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, but they won't pay you for it like children will (because I don't accept food stamps).
2010-12-10 [Nekko fox]: What do they pay you with Mort? Gum drops? Lollipops? Teddies?
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Souls, mostly, but also lunch money and innocence.
2010-12-10 [Aliz]: No kidneys? =0
2010-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: What the fuck is that white thing in the picture?
2010-12-10 [Aliz]: ...[Mortified Penguin]?
2010-12-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: *looks at Aliz*
2010-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no. That's Larry, our new janitor/chef/sales representative/accountant/translator.
2010-12-11 [Ninja Smurf]: ... and he also dances.
2010-12-11 [Nekko fox]: ...And eats baby dragons.
2010-12-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok then....
2010-12-11 [Nekko fox]: He doesn't like bunnies though.


  

2010-12-11 [Thunder Cid]:   



Who doesn't like bunnies.
2010-12-11 [~Crimson Angel~]: CUTE BUNNY!
2010-12-11 [Nekko fox]: Synx LIKED bunnies


  



Then he ate them


  



Then he didn't like them.
2010-12-11 [Ninja Smurf]: It's all that fuzzy hair.
2010-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably the same reason he doesn't like Misty.
2010-12-11 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, he doesn't like the grease the fats secrete from their pores.
2010-12-11 [Aliz]: SMURFS :D
2010-12-12 [Ninja Smurf]: He never ate Smurfs... they are much too small!
2010-12-12 [Nekko fox]: Nope, must be roughly human sized, as seen in the diagram below.


  

2010-12-13 [Aliz]: It's blue= smurf
2010-12-13 [Flisky]: So they have adamantium lining their stomach?
2010-12-13 [Nekko fox]: Congrats Flisky, you earned a Nerd Dollar, redeemable here at B's D. It only takes eighty-fice nerd dollars for a high quality glass of tap water (no ice and luke warm)
2010-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You wish! That's pre-recession prices. It'll now cost two hundred ninety-fice nerd dollars and the water is served in a piece of used tinfoil crumpled into the shape of a bowl.
2010-12-13 [Nekko fox]: Don't be daft mort, we can't afford tin foil. You know we just use cans we took from hobos.
2010-12-14 [Flisky]: Hobo can water? Well...I better start saving now.
2010-12-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...
2010-12-14 [Ninja Smurf]: uh-oh... Misty's choking!
2010-12-14 [Nekko fox]: I'll use the Fatkin's Maneuver!


*Proceeds to beat her with ham*


IT'S NOT WORKING! HER BODY IS ABSORBING IT! WE NEED SOMETHING BIGGER!


*starts beating her with Flisky*
2010-12-14 [Flisky]: *hopes she is not absorbed into Misty*
2010-12-14 [Thunder Cid]: *sprays misty*


  



2010-12-15 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sneezes for I am allergic to Flisky*
2010-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: QUARANTINE HER! *Bob's Special Disease Prevention Squad bursts in and throws lye in Misty's face* FINISH HER. *they rip out Misty's spine* FATALITY... *business resumes as usual*...
2010-12-17 [Aliz]: Nom. Lye. Can I toast some of that? :D
2010-12-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: My second spine!
2010-12-18 [twitchboy]: if you have sex with your clone is it gay or masturbation? Well bestiality in mort's case.
2010-12-18 [Tekkon KinKreet]: all the above plus a bit of fetishism
2010-12-18 [Aliz]: Don't forget twincest...
2010-12-18 [Nekko fox]: YOU'RE a twin!
2010-12-19 [Thunder Cid]: If [Aliz] wanted her comeback Nekko she'd have wiped it from your face!
2010-12-19 [Nekko fox]: It WOULD be her come back if I said that she was twincest...and said exactly what she said, But I didn't. So now you're a hobo.


*Gives Cid raggedy clothing and a sign saying "Will give blow for cash"*
2010-12-19 [Thunder Cid]: YOU'RE A HOBO!
2010-12-19 [Nekko fox]: *Throws hobo semen on Cid's face*


I PROCURED THAT FROM YOUR MOTHER'S CHIN!
2010-12-19 [Thunder Cid]: I WILL FUCK YOU WITH A WHISK!
2010-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *customers look up, as I stir some soup with a whisk* Don't worry! We have more than one whisk! *they go back to being blissfully ignorant and eating tainted soup*
2010-12-19 [Flisky]: I'm glad I didn't order the soup. *is still waiting for her hobo water*
2010-12-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles* Ah, the stupid costumers.
2010-12-19 [Nekko fox]: *gives Misty her bucket of soup with 100% homegrown clams made from recycled napkins*
2010-12-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: No thanks, I don't eat soup.
2010-12-19 [Thunder Cid]:   
2010-12-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not in Gryffindor.
2010-12-19 [Thunder Cid]: Yeah like you could get into Hogwarts :P
2010-12-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Fuck You!
2010-12-19 [Thunder Cid]:   
2010-12-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Well I'm not nearly as good looking as Hermione.
2010-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: So true...
2010-12-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Indeed it is Mort, indeed it is. *nods*
2010-12-19 [Nekko fox]:   


                                                              I think we can all know Misty would just EAT Hermione.
2010-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Hell, I would eat Hermione too.
2010-12-19 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you're a cannibal.
2010-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't act surprised! You saw me eat three customers yesterday!
2010-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: It's not my fault flesh is so delicious...
2010-12-19 [Nekko fox]: Actually, it is. You had them implant that "humans taste delicious" machine into your sympathetic nerve system. Now every time you experience fight or flight, YOU EAT A PATRON.
2010-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh, um... th- that's not... I... I mean... *eats a patron*
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: That's why we put bats in your pants.
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'd eat her alright, but not in the cannibal way. ;)
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: And I'm sure she'd stab you in the eye with her Jew wand. Did you know that all wizards and witches are Jews? True story. Dirty, hate-filled, resentful, stingy Jews.
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, she wouldn't get the chance.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: Sure she would. It's not you could chase her down.
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, but I could tie her up in her sleep.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: Jews never sleep.
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes they do, everyone sleeps. Well almost everyone.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: Almost everyone...except...the JEWS.
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, Except insomniacs.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: What do you think Jews are? Geez, you incestuous rednecks are ignorant...
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Not all of them are Insomniacs.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: *Shrugs* Like I said, ignorant.
2010-12-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nope.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: Must be nice, being that ignorant.
2010-12-20 [Nekko fox]: Pretty blissful.
2010-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: I have a boyfriend!!!! SO FUCK YOU ALL!
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: I found your boyfriend. He looks confused.


  

2010-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: My boyfriend isn't a bird.
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: No wait, here he is.


  

2010-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: He's not black.
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Hey you racist sow, they are proud and misunderstood people! Don't be calling them the absence of light.
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Not your boyfriend though. He's about as bright as a broken lightbulb in Mariana's Trench.
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: But we found out what your boyfriends name is.


  

2010-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, his name is Jerry
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: His name be Toby now.
2010-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: No it's not
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]:   






































  



































  

2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2010-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Also, I noticed your boyfriend wears Van Heusen ties. I'll give him points for that. Gotta ask though, did you eat the family in that picture?


  

2010-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We need more people in here to make fun of. These jokes about Misty are, very much like Misty herself, old, worn out, unclassy, over used, and, more often than not, disgusting.
2010-12-24 [Nekko fox]: I'll start spreading the word of Bob.
2010-12-25 [twitchboy]: if you wish apon a star makes no difference who you are (except mort) all your dreams will come true (except morts) because really a penguin army with head mounted lasers?
2010-12-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: would be pretty sweet really
2010-12-27 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not old, worn, unclassy, disgusting or over used.
2010-12-27 [Nekko fox]: Misty, you look forty, you have the skin complexion of a thirty year-old leather jacket that got wet and was left out in the sun, you appear greasy in all your pictures, and considering your redneck background, 'overused' is an assumption but based on high probability.
2010-12-27 [Nekko fox]: Also, Penguin army with head mounted lasers are unwieldy and hard to mobilize. Bring in Bear Cavalry mountain on Abrams tanks.
2010-12-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: I do not look fourty, you're the only one that thinks that, and at least I don't look like some dork that's smoking a fucking pipe dressed like a man from way back in the early 1900s with a new age car in the background.
2010-12-29 [Nekko fox]: Your just jealous because you lack style, and you didn't disagree with any of the other disparaging observations.
2010-12-29 [Nekko fox]: Oh, and Mort made me say that.
2010-12-29 [Nekko fox]: He's very persuasive. Especially with his singing.
2010-12-29 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm a virgin, so I'm not overused.
2010-12-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I told you to stab her, not say that! *shoots twitchboy's kneecap with a harpoon gun*
2010-12-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Go vote at EPRM Fungus Reference! I'm not allowed to tell you who to vote for, but if you make the wrong choice, I will shatter your kneecaps with a tire iron and eat the flesh from your bones.
2010-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2010-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU MADE THE WRONG CHOICE.
2010-12-30 [Nekko fox]: *shatters Misty's greasy, overused, leathery kneecaps using Mort*
2010-12-30 [Mortified Penguin]: My face!
2010-12-30 [Nekko fox]: It's okay, the bone fragments add a certain allure.
2010-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: I voted for you Mort
2010-12-31 [Ninja Smurf]: Which would explain why you were wrong...
2010-12-31 [~Crimson Angel~]: ok...
2010-12-31 [Mortified Penguin]: But... you clearly didn't! My number of votes has yet to rise above the two that I voted!
2011-01-01 [twitchboy]: Gah! my Knee! good thing i bought spares from morts discount medIcal supplies! *duct tapes them on*
2011-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-02 [Nekko fox]: Chimichanga is fun to say.
2011-01-05 [~Crimson Angel~]: It is.
2011-01-05 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hey thats where paco went to... hadn't seen him in awhile. he looks kinda cold down there, just sayin. *turns heat to two hundred degrees and turns bake on.* that should be better.
2011-01-05 [Nekko fox]: He needs more beans.
2011-01-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2011-01-06 [Nekko fox]: Quiet cow. No words from the mascot.
2011-01-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not a cow, and lol is not a word.
2011-01-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: its an acronym so its technically three words. just sayin.
2011-01-08 [Nekko fox]: Also, 'lol' has gone from meaning "laugh(ing) out loud" to "I have nothing worthwhile to contribute to the conversation". Also, I didn't say if lol was or wasn't a word, I just said to be quiet.
2011-01-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: I wasn't talking, and you can't technically hear me laugh so you can't tell me to be quiet.
2011-01-08 [Nekko fox]: Your typed words implied speech.
2011-01-08 [Nekko fox]: Even monkeys know that.
2011-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: It's true. *points at a box of rotting monkey meat labeled "hot dogs"* They did know that.
2011-01-08 [Nekko fox]: SHUT UP HOTDOGS!


*Smacks the box with Misty*
2011-01-09 [~Crimson Angel~]: *blinks*
2011-01-09 [Flisky]: Hey! I was going to eat that! Now look what you did!
2011-01-09 [Nekko fox]: You were gonna eat the mascot, Misty the Cow?
2011-01-09 [Flisky]: Maybe later. I wanted monkey flavored hot dogs.
2011-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Or maybe they're hot dog flavored monkeys! You think about that, while I donkey punch your mom.
2011-01-10 [Flisky]: Have at it. She's not really my mom.
2011-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: She'll never be anyone's mom again when I finish with her!
2011-01-11 [Sir Soapy]: Hmm...
2011-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: We have an average of 7.6617647058823529411764705882353 comments a day at this point (for this year). Probably because of Misty. I suggest we burn her alive as an offering to the dark lord, so that he may restore our average number of comments a day to a healthier number, like 60.
2011-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: And furthermore, I make a motion that we di- *a half eaten unicorn bursts into the meeting room/kitchen*


"SSKRRRAAAAA!! SSSKRRRRRRAAAAAAAAA!!!"


Son of a WHORE. *grabs unicorn gauntlet off the wall and fires lasers from his palm wildly into the air, killing 12 businessmen, 2 maids, and a chef, but completely missing the unicorn*
2011-01-13 [Sideways]:   









I WARNED YOU, MORT.
2011-01-13 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-14 [Alexi Ice]: HAHAHA! I miss this place...>>
2011-01-14 [twitchboy]:   
2011-01-14 [Alexi Ice]:   


...>> Pft!
2011-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: lol
2011-01-14 [Alexi Ice]: Sideways is your knight now, Misty <3 *huggle* He ate Mort! *Pauses* *cracks up laughing* HAHAHA!
2011-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll give you indigestion!
2011-01-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-14 [Alexi Ice]: *Glomps Fox* Sniper! Run!
2011-01-14 [Alexi Ice]: Hiya!
2011-01-14 [~Crimson Angel~]: *glomps*
2011-01-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-16 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: wow....lotsa pics...
2011-01-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why does Mel have a bever on his hand?
2011-01-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I hate that face.
2011-01-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-20 [Flisky]:   



The only troll face I have...
2011-01-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-25 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: ...wow...
2011-01-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-26 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-01-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-26 [Alexi Ice]: PFT! Epic!


  



  



  



  



  



  

2011-01-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-01-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-27 [Pillowthief]: I just wanted to let you all know.


I hate you.


That is all.
2011-01-27 [Nekko fox]:   



                                                                                ^--------Pillowthief's face when he realized that Misty's black boyfriend (named Toby) got to his watermelon first.
2011-01-27 [Pillowthief]: THAT SONOFABITCH!
2011-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: That's why I invested heavily in Toby traps. Sadly, all I've caught so far is a Toby Keith and two Tobey Maguire's.
2011-01-27 [Alexi Ice]: Who the hell is Toby *Looks around* *Kills random person* ....>>
2011-01-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Th-that was Jimmy... he was my friend...
2011-01-28 [Alexi Ice]: Too bad?
2011-01-28 [Nekko fox]: Fuck you Akane! Who do you think you are, traipsing around and killing our friends?


*Shoots Tommy, Jimmy's brother and dear friend of Pillowthief and Sagacious Turkey*
2011-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Seriously! What is WRONG with you, Akane? How could you be so callous? So CRUEL? What kind of SICK person takes another human life?! Jimmy had hopes and dreams! He was gonna be a star, damn you! A STAR. But you took that all away! And for WHAT? HOW COULD YOU? I mean, I... I just... GAH!! *violently kicks Tommy's corpse in anger* People can be so THOUGHTLESS! I'm so SICK of people like you! You go about flippantly taking lives like it's nothing! You treat people like they're Misty! Or Paco! Or Pillowthief's mom! But they're not! They're human beings!
2011-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: GGGAAAAAAAAHH!! *tears down a column*... *a large portion of the diner collapses, crushing an Italian family to death*...
2011-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNYYYYYYAAAAAAAAHH!! *jabs a fork into on old lady's skull, while her young grandson tries to hold back my arm*... KYAH! *snaps the little kid's neck and rips off his head*... YOUR BLOOD WILL WASH AWAY MY SORROW. *drinks the kid's blood that's spewing from his gaping esophagus* BRRRRAAAAAAIIIINNNSSS!!! *starts biting into a corpses head*
2011-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*rips off a chunk of face and starts storming away angrily*... if anyone needs me, I'll be in my office!! *kicks down the door to the women's restroom*... *screaming ensues*...
2011-01-28 [Nekko fox]: *Points at the ensuing madness*


Damn it Akane! Look at what you did! Now we have to get his formulated goat's milk substitute, genetically-fermented soybean and oat-bran cookies with none-glucose additive and his polycarbonate, high-tensile smiting blanket before he'll calm down and go back to just chewing on the regulars instead of the new folks. Do even know how hard it is to genetically ferment soybeans? IT'S RIDICULOUSLY EASY!


*Picks up the severed leg of one of the crushed Italian folks and back-foots Misty's black, jewish boyfriend before storming after Mort by going outside and selling free samples at super-inflated prices*
2011-01-28 [Alexi Ice]: *Loads shotgun* *Continues to kill every unsuspecting person in the diner* HAHAHA! *Lights match and pours gasoline into the women's bathroom and sets it on fire* *Runs around and dances in the blood of the italian family*
2011-01-28 [Nekko fox]: *watches as Akane goes absolutely bonkers in her little padded cell. He turns to the doctor*


Is there ANY chance she will recover from her delusions and hallucinations?


*The doctor shakes his head glumly before turning back to watch the squirming human wriggling in their new straight jacket*


So, she'll just be stuck there in her world of imagination, laughing and drooling and peeing herself?


*another nod*


All the time?


*Another nod*


Even holidays?


*Raised eyebrow, questioning look*


What about leap year?


*The doctor walks off*
2011-01-28 [Alexi Ice]: *Smiles*
2011-01-28 [Nekko fox]: *Goes back to cooking for the diner full of lunatics, wonder HOW on EARTH B's D ended up in a Loony Ward*
2011-01-28 [Alexi Ice]:   
  

  

2011-01-28 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-01-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-28 [Pillowthief]: They're sneaky. Trust me.
2011-01-28 [zankou]: Such utter degradation of human society. Also known as bobs diner..
2011-01-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-01-31 [Pillowthief]: WHY MONDAYS?!? RACIST AGAINST TUESDAYS?


Well, I guess the monkeys have their Sweet Monkey Tuesdays (says I)... RACIST AGAINST WEDNESDAYS?!?
2011-01-31 [Nekko fox]: Nah, Wednesday was eaten by Misty and her boy-monkey.
2011-01-31 [Aliz]: Then... Thursday-racist?
2011-02-01 [Pillowthief]: Wednesday didn't get eaten! She killed Misty's boy-monkey and doesnt even feel bad about it.


  

2011-02-01 [Nekko fox]: That's because Wednesday is a brave an hero and doesn't afraid of anything!
2011-02-02 [Pillowthief]: I think you're thinking of Thursday. Thursday is a brave An hero and doesn't afraid of anything. Wednesday will just kill you.
2011-02-03 [Nekko fox]: Oh. Well, shit, there goes my entire speech. I'm gonna kill my speech writer. FRIDAY?! FRIDAY! WEAR ARE YOU?!
2011-02-03 [Pillowthief]: Exactly.
2011-02-03 [Nekko fox]: *Grabs a year old flank-steak and proceeds to beat some newly-imported orphans viciously while crying and singing "Bohemian Rhapsody", now available through iTunes*
2011-02-03 [Pillowthief]: Bohemia? Wear is that?
2011-02-03 [Nekko fox]: It's in your mother. We had to extract it using a very delicate, yet excruciatingly painful process called "Stabbing".
2011-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the window, grappling with a large unicorn*... WILT THOU GIVEST ME THINE GOLD, HOOFED BEAST?!


"Neigh!!"


THEN I SHALL FEAST UPON YOUR FLESH!! *stabs the unicorn in the throat and twists and pulls the blade, to completely decapitate it*... *holds the severed head up by the horn*... Not so noble NOW are you, Prince Gallopius?! *spits on the head* Your family will pay the price for your betrayal, starting with the youngest foal! The clan dies on the morrow! *grabs an AK-47, two M16's, and a rocket launcher from the weapon rack in the kitchen and storms out the back door*


*a group of little girls gathered for a unicorn themed birthday party sob uncontrollably over the corpse of the once valiant Prince Gallopius*... *his magical entrails spill out all over the floor*...*"DIOS MIO!!" shouts the irate Mexican janitor, who apparently has grown weary of cleaning parts of celestial beings off the floor*... "Into the chili you go, horsey!" *he tosses the corpse into a large boiling cauldron*
2011-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *returns with Pillowthief's mom's head*... I found this HORse lurking outside.
2011-02-03 [Nekko fox]: *Points at the head*


You know, Mort, she didn't deserve that. Couldn't you at least throw her into a fire instead? Then we wouldn't have to consider how to cook her later.
2011-02-04 [Pillowthief]: My Mother is not a horse!




She might do well in stew though... *hmmm....*
2011-02-04 [Pillowthief]:
________________
  

2011-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: This is how your mom looked when I was killing her.


  

2011-02-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-06 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-06 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-07 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-07 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Gah, I HATE prey mantis......blech.... *cringe*
2011-02-07 [Flisky]: Gee, I had momentarily forgotten how much I love /b/ob's diner.
2011-02-07 [Pillowthief]: God, I need a drink.
2011-02-07 [Pillowthief]: *Dionysus walks in the front door*
  

2011-02-07 [Pillowthief]: I love this place! *tear*
2011-02-07 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: o.O
2011-02-08 [Nekko fox]: Dyonysus just showed up because God was busy being a pervert.




  

2011-02-08 God: I don't think you're funny.
2011-02-08 [God]: I don't think you're very funny.
2011-02-08 [God]: I don't think I like your face.
2011-02-08 [God]: I think I made a horrible mistake making your face.
2011-02-08 [Pillowthief]: Now look what you've done. You've hurt god's feelings. Careful, if Dionysus wasn't drunk, he'd be mad too, with you all insinuating that he's not a god and all that.
2011-02-08 [Nekko fox]: Did I say Dionysus isn't a God. Bitch just don't listen.
2011-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Dionysus isn't a God! He doesn't even have nearly as many arms as my God! ...get 'im, Shiva!


*Shiva glances over and then goes back to drinking shots of whiskey from each of his hands*


What?! Shiva, you drunken bastard! I'll kill you!


*Dionysus breaks a wine bottle and starts slashing at me*
2011-02-09 [Pillowthief]: *Shortround bursts through the double revolving door from the kitchen*


Dr Jones! Dr Jones! You come quick, you lady friend in trouble again!


*Harrison Ford sighs, then discreetly exits the room*
2011-02-09 [Nekko fox]: And during the interim, man rejects God.


  

2011-02-09 [Pillowthief]: *God is offended!*
  

2011-02-09 [Pillowthief]: *God enters the God Mode cheat!
  

2011-02-09 [Pillowthief]: *God starts killing innocent kittens!*
  

2011-02-09 [Pillowthief]: *God gets tired of killing kittens and decides to kill Domos!*
  

2011-02-09 [Pillowthief]: *God gets tired of killing Domos and goes back to playing Street Fighter!*
  

2011-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Come on, God! You can't even beat Bison?! You suck!


Dibs on next game.
2011-02-09 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-10 [Pillowthief]: Due to Adult Swim, Im supposed to stay off the "Ends of Words", so I will refrain from comment.



2011-02-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-11 [God]: You cannot Win against God.
2011-02-11 [God]: Stupid Internet! Let me upload my awesome picture of me personified as Link, crushing this puny fairy!!
2011-02-11 [God]: GRAAAAAGH!
2011-02-11 [God]: WHY WONT YOU UPLOAD? I CREATED THE UNIVERSE! OBEY ME!
2011-02-11 [God]: Fine. You win. (stupid internet *grumble*)
2011-02-11 [Nekko fox]: You mean this, God?


  

2011-02-11 [God]: Damn Myself (capitalized, because Im a mother fucking p.i.m.p.)
2011-02-11 [God]: Btw Nekko, God IS a true vegetarian. This is what makes him 1337.
2011-02-11 [God]: (Stupid internet)
2011-02-11 [God]: *God has switched from Street Fighter to X3, because God is above all things, an entrepreneur*
2011-02-11 [God]: *God trades mineral rights from Xenon space to Earth space*
2011-02-12 [God]: *God, realizing he was tricked after discovering his 'mineral rights' were actually a deed to a time-share in Detroit, unmakes the Xenon*
2011-02-12 [Nekko fox]: God, we're slowly beginning to realize you weren't right for this job after all.
2011-02-12 [God]: Silence infidel!
2011-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Why, God, why?! Without dangerous amounts of Xenon in our meatloaf, how are kids going to get their recommended daily serving of Vitamin X?!
2011-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Thanks a lot. Now I'll just have to give them an extra dose of Vitamin R to compensate. *bombards the meatloaf with a massive amount of Radon using Bob's Patented Quantum Particle Launcher*... *the launcher becomes unstable and explodes, causing Misty's face to mutate horribly, because that's apparently what Radon does to faces. I should know. I'm a chemist, damn you! But, I digress, Misty's face melts and everyone cheers*
2011-02-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: God, you still owe me $20 from that poker game last month. You WILL pay this time or I'll have to break your damn kneecaps again!
2011-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts into the diner, nonchalantly obliterating the patrons* It's goofy time!
2011-02-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: NO, DADDY, NNOOOOO!! PUT THE HATCHET DOWN!
2011-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *cranks up the chainsaw*... It's time for some good ol' lovin', boy! *snorts some cocaine*...
2011-02-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: SWEET MERCIFUL SATAN, NO! That was MY cocaine, old man! *cranks up the chaingun*
2011-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, that does it! *chains up the crankgun*... Your punk ass is mine! *pistol-whips your mother's sweet ass and commences to rainbow your sh*t*... (That's right! Rainbow's a verb now!)
2011-02-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Aw, HELL naw. *guns up the crankchain*... Let's DO THIS. Nobody rainbows up my sh*t and gets away with it! NOT. EVEN. CLOUDS.
2011-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I WILL RAINBOW THE SH*T OUT OF YOUR CANDY ASS. *upchains the guncrank*... Prepare your mind! *begins to vomit magical plumes of unicorn hair which sprout rainbow elves*... *they all simultaneously rainbow your face beyond recognition*... IT'S ON.
2011-02-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: MY FACE! MY HIDEOUS FACE! What have you done?!! *crankguns the upchain*... *uses the upchain to decapitate myself*... *two heads sprout up from the place of the old one*... Now get ready for a savage UNICORN BLAST! *shoots at you with a handgun poorly labeled "UNICORN" on the side and painted pink*
2011-02-12 [Nekko fox]: *Grainchunks the puns*


Y'all bitches need to learn you some manners before I have to summon some chocolate people.


  





GODDAMNIT IT THEY'RE HERE.
2011-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn chocolate people! Can't you read the sign on the door?! It clearly says, "No chocolate people (except white chocolate)!"
2011-02-13 [Nekko fox]: And I didn't even get to summon them, the bastards.
2011-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: At least we've got Misty here to defend us by eating them an- *Misty flops around and gurgles on the floor*... oh, right. The melted face. Well, I guess we've still got our attack crocodile, but he's a little preoccupied at the moment.



2011-02-13 [God]: Guess who summoned the chocolate people!












That be me, you infidels. Now bow before their might and give me faith! I HUNGER! *Eats Misty's soul*
2011-02-13 [Nekko fox]: Goddamn it God, we asked for Lemon people, so we could make lemonade. Now we need to find a new god.
2011-02-13 [God]: God doesn't bearhump.
2011-02-13 [Nekko fox]: Regardless, you've been slacking! We're going to designate a new God for this area in order to properly facilitate corporate machinations and promote synergy and direct workflow, because you just simply are not the boss anymore. The board itself is asking for your resignation.
2011-02-13 [Nekko fox]: Please feed your resignation letter to Misty's melted face and we will probably give you a good reference for a small fee of Everything Forever.
2011-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: And please return your corporate jacket to Shirley at the front desk on your way out.
2011-02-13 [Nekko fox]: I thought you fired Shirley, and that's why you hired this schmuck to be God?
2011-02-13 [God]: But, but, but...




I AM /b/
2011-02-13 [Pillowthief]: Weird. I thought I was /b/.
2011-02-13 [Nekko fox]: No, I'M /b/.
2011-02-13 [God]: Im pretty sure Im /b/. *unmakes Nekko*
2011-02-13 [Araglas]:   


I summon Buddha to ressurect Nekko!
2011-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Pssh. Like Buddha could ever do anything! Hold on, I'll summon the eternal dragon to do it... let's see... four, five, six... what the hell?! Where's the other-


"Bah ha ha haa!! Looking for something?"


  

2011-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: SONUVABITCH, VEGETA. Gimme back my ball!


"Suck it, bitch!"


  

2011-02-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, HEY! Get back here! I need that to-


Ah, forget it. It's not worth it... *goes back to reading a magazine at the register*...


  

2011-02-13 [Araglas]: *Buddha kills Vageta*



2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet! *takes ball back* Don't worry, Nekko! I'll bring you back! *summons the dragon*


  



"WHAT IS YOUR WISH?"


Wish? Don't you mean wishes? I get three, right?


"NO. THAT IS ONLY ON NAMEK. ON EARTH YOU GET ONE."


What?! Craaaaap. I wish I had known that earlier, dang it!


"WISH GRANTED."


Huh? That doesn't even- oooooh right! You told me about that yesterday! Damn, I forgot! That's pretty funny though... *goes back to reading a magazine at the register and paying no attention to the long line of irate customers who have dragon droppings in their food*...
2011-02-14 name: I like it so much,
2011-02-14 [Araglas]:   


WTF??
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh. Apparently this isn't the first time we've summoned Shenron. Back on page 235, we screwed up another wish... weird...


( ፨ ) ( ፡ ) ( ። ) ( · ) ( ∴ ) ( ᎒᎒ ) (:·:)
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *Paco bursts in, demanding a settlement check for that time we used him as a pinata and damaged his liver!*


Pay Him

Call Attorney

Offer A Sacrifice Unto The Dark Lord

>Eat Ramen

Put It In

>Disregard Him And Move On Without Even The Slightest Bit Of Continuity In The Matter




*the problem ceases to exist*


*Mort eats ramen*


Mort gained 3964exp!


Mort leveled up to lvl65!
2011-02-14 [Nekko fox]: WHOOO! POWER-LEVELING BITCHES!


  



*Is somehow remade. Might have something to do with the random clones running around, a ever-so-subtle 'FUCK YOU' to god and his big toe. Mostly his toe.*
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: YES. I'm finally a high enough level to explore the catacombs! *cranks up his mighty gun/sword and heads toward the basement*
2011-02-14 [Araglas]: Wait! You need a White Mage to protect you from the evil wizard! And I'm level 64! Unless someone has a small cube of Tofu I can eat, then I'll level up to 65!
2011-02-14 First paris hilton sex tape: I have the same., http://www.parishiltonsextape.350.com/ paris hilton sex tape, htmu,
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats the last piece of tofu*... ah, sick! I don't even like tofu! *spits it into the soup of the day*


Hmm. That link/person seems somewhat suspicious... I had better investigate the matter further by clicking the link.
2011-02-14 [God]: I wouldn't trust it. Look how they called Arag an Htmu! Inhumane, that is.
2011-02-14 Cheapest r kelly sex tape: Best Wishes, http://blog.bitcomet.com/post/304418/ Cheapest r kelly sex tape, 57223,
2011-02-14 [God]: Don't call God a 57223! Blasphemy!
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, he does have a point there. You are kind of acting like a total 57223.
2011-02-14 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-14 high risk personal loans: I like your work!, http://blog.bitcomet.com/post/304720/ All about high risk personal loans, 8(,
2011-02-14 [Nekko fox]:   



  

2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, and God:


  

2011-02-14 All about bad credit student loans: Best Wishes!, http://badcreditstudentloans.bowlspace.com/ All about bad credit student loans, =-))),
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: That smiley has a lot of chins.
2011-02-14 All about paris hilton sex tape: Very interesting sites., http://www.box.net/shared/fa8nac57qk paris hilton sex tape, qzro,
2011-02-14 Discount kristin davis sex tape: :-), http://docs.codehaus.org/display/AJLIB/KRISTIN+DAVIS+SEX+TAPE kristin davis sex tape, rek,
2011-02-14 Best buy adipex: Good Job, http://docs.codehaus.org/display/AJLIB/BUY+ADIPEX buy adipex, %(((,
2011-02-14 [Nekko fox]: I know someone is acting niggardly by posting pure nonsense. STOP IT ALREADY PILLOWTHIEF!


*Proceeds to beat the liquid remains of Misty's blubbery face with a pool cue before challenging some bikers to pool. He promptly vomits on them and runs outside whistling*
2011-02-14 [Araglas]: *whistles and starts to clean the diner with misty's melted face*
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I said Windex! WINDEX!! I swear... how do you even get "Misty's melted face" from that?


Just spray some of the soup around. There's enough alcohol in there to kill most known diseases.
2011-02-14 [Nekko fox]: Mort, I told you, Isopropyl alcohol isn't meant for soup. We use that for the pastry specials. And besides, you didn't use the alcohol anyway, you just poured in three gallon-sized bags of cows blood.
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: But... it's pastry soup! I think... it's all pink and stuff...
2011-02-14 [Ace-of-Spirits]: O-o why did you invite me Mortified Penguin?
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: We need more comments/patrons/victims! Misty can only die so many times... *harpoons Nok*
2011-02-14 [God]: That's a pretty good depiction of me- I carry that hammer everywhere nowadays. Never know when you're going to need- weeeell, would you look at that. THOOOOORS RAAAAGE! *God smashes Mistys face into a gooey puddle*
2011-02-14 [God]: *god casts lightning at Chelsey, obliterating her spleen*
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *steps over the face/spleen puddles* If you're going to lounge around here, at least use your hammer to fix some of the loose nails on that wall over there. *points at a segment of wall completely ripped off and laying in the parking lot*
2011-02-14 [Pillowthief]: Good shot god, you rock.


And dont look at me for spam. That has you written all over it.
2011-02-14 [God]: *God is out of mana*
2011-02-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Drink a Gatorade, God. Always works for me!
2011-02-15 [djxmonster]: Ahh.... Bob's Diner... it's been a looong time...
2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes. Too long... now get me scotch, jerk! On the rocks, preferably. Don't make me cut your face.
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: *hands god a bottle of ether* Here you go, this will fill you right up!
2011-02-15 [God]: *Glug* Ah! Much better. *uses Misty's bones and blood to reconstruct part of the wall*
2011-02-15 [Nekko fox]: *djxmonster disappears to get a drink apparently. Nekko returns and hands Mort a bottle that says "Distilled Essence of djxmonster, pulped and sifted for your pleasure"*
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: *is in kitchen and pokes head out* Hey we finally have fresh meat! Who wants a burger?
2011-02-15 [Nekko fox]: FUCK YOUR FACE WITH A RABID BADGER!


*throws a flaming flamingo at Chelsey-P*


WHY DOES EVERYONE HAVE TO BE SO SARCASTIC ALL THE TIME?!


*Continues to viciously beat Chelsey-P with an unconscious orphan that he found in the garbage*
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: *looks at Neeko* So you want that over easy or well done?
2011-02-15 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Hm..I would have thought newbies were fresh meat also..anybody up for a spot of cannibalism?
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: *spots infinity* YOU! How do you want your burger?
2011-02-15 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I want it mooing please.
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: One moo--...well it doesn'tmoo but it sure makes a noise. *goes back into the kitchen and blood curling screams could be heard*
2011-02-15 [djxmonster]: *stumbles back in*
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: *walks out of the kitchen with a hamburger chained to a plate, its squeals making quite a racket* Here ya go Infinity!
2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Where's mah scotch, boy?! *throws a bottle of scotch at Chelsey-P's head*


Scotch and Spider-Man, dang it! YOU. PARKER. I want a glass of Spider-Man! djxmonster! Get me pictures of scotch!
2011-02-15 [djxmonster]:   
2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: That's some weird ass looking Absinthe. NOW WHERE'S MY WHISKEY?! *breaks Chelsey-P's arm*


And Parker, you're fired!


"But a glass of Spider-Man doesn't even make sen-"


FIRED!
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: *hands Mort a glass of Spider-Man* Here ya go boss!
2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a swig*... This tastes nothing like Drain-O! *spits it out in Chelsey-P's face*


It does have a distinct aftertaste though. Hmm. Bourbon, latex, and ashes. Quite delicious.


Nekko, you get a $20,000 raise for this wonderful drink!
2011-02-15 [djxmonster]: Is it dinner time? lunch? breakfast?
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: Its Disco time!!
  

2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-15 [djxmonster]: In that case, I will take a number 5 (appetizer) and a number 18 (drink)
2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sorry, but it seems our number 5 is quite a while past its expiration date.
2011-02-15 [Mortified Penguin]: As for that number 18 though... *violently cracks open a seagull*... *gets a key from its exposed colon*... *uses the key to open a vault*... *gets a piece of paper from the vault*... *uses the number on the paper on a combo lock on a larger safe*... *takes out a Sword of Light*... *uses the sword to stab Misty's face puddle*...


Anyway, what? Oh, right. *gets some GHRA from behind the counter*
2011-02-15 [Araglas]: I'm on break.
2011-02-15 [djxmonster]: *hiccups*
2011-02-15 [God]: WHAT THE HELL? DO I HAVE TO START GETTING JEALOUS OVER UGLY CHICKS TOO?
2011-02-15 [Nekko fox]: Be quiet God, we don't need you any more.


*Uses his $20,000 raise to put a down-payment on a new messiah/God duo*
2011-02-15 [AleriaLumina]: I'll have whatever he's having! *Points to a random person.*
2011-02-15 [Flisky]: Hey, didn't your mom ever tell you it's not nice to point at people!
2011-02-15 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, geez Aleria, how rude?


*starts spitting in random customer's drinks before urinating in the punchbowl. It was party time, after all*
2011-02-15 [AleriaLumina]: Nope! Did YOUR *Points at Flisky.* mom tell you that?
2011-02-15 [Nekko fox]: Yes, she did, and then she personally coached you on the matter last Wednesday.
2011-02-15 [Greg Universe]: I want to comment, yet don't think I should... I think it's because I know I'm pure n00b... I don't know... -shifty eyes-
2011-02-15 [Nekko fox]: *Pushes Sayumi into a soup pot full of boiling water*


Quiet you shifty newb you. We have customer's to feed.


*Indicates a single pirate who is yelling at a coat rack*
2011-02-15 [Jenny Crank]: You should really serve "Bitch slap yo mama pie"..or my momma..whichever..
2011-02-15 [Flisky]: Nekko! You just ruined the bowled water soup! What's wrong with you?!
2011-02-16 [Araglas]: I'm ztill on break for another 20 minutes
2011-02-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Infinity gets her tomahawk out and starts to dance on the tables-much to the delight of most of the other diners*
2011-02-16 [Flisky]: *would throw a dollar bill up for Infinity, but hasn't gotten her paycheck in five years*
2011-02-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *pulls change out of change jar and throws it on tables for Infinity* If throwing $100 is making it rain, and diamonds are making it snow, is throwing change called making it hail?
2011-02-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: No. It's called cheap.
2011-02-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Can I get partial credit for trying?
2011-02-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Yes. I will blow gently on your scalp..
2011-02-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: ..Before removing it swiftly and nailing it to the wall.
2011-02-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: I needed to do something new with my hair anyway
2011-02-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Yeah, I thought so. Visit my salon and I'll give you a good sharp cut. Nicky Clarke eat your heart out. Oh wait. I already did that.
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, the wall is in the parking lot whenever you get that scalp removed.
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: And the parking lot is over by the coat rack.
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: The one the pirate with three hooks is yelling at.
2011-02-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Hm..I challenge ye to a duel. *Slaps pirate with a mitten*
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *pirate pulls out his Yu-Gi-Oh! cards*... "ARR, BITCH! YE BE IN FER A SWIFT BEATIN' WHEN I SUMMON MY BLUE EYES!"
2011-02-16 [djxmonster]: *wakes up wondering what the hell is going on*
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Crap. He's waking up too soon! We only got three of his kidneys!


We still need two lungs and an appendix. *starts rummaging through Misty's open corpse*
2011-02-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Do you really need two lungs?
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I dunno. I just do what the oven tells me.


"BURN THEM ALL!"


Shut up, oven! Get out of my head!!
2011-02-16 [Nekko fox]: Yes Saggy, yes. Preferably wrapped in plastic and exported to Hong Kong.
2011-02-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah, yes. Hong Kong. The oriental cousin of King and Donkey Kong. At least he doesn't kidnap women and climb stuff like the rest of his family. He just flings poo off skyscrapers and masturbates furiously in the middle of the street during rush hour.
2011-02-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: But, well, who doesn't these days?


Point being, I've got an extra lung in my van. Well, in the grill of my van, I should say. It's been there since the concert. Apparently parking on stage was frowned upon for some reason.
2011-02-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: Damn lazy teenagers in the audience. They could carry a band member just fine when he jumped off stage into the crowd, but when I ramped my car off the stage, the lazy jerks just complained and screamed and bled and ran and stuff.
2011-02-16 [Nekko fox]: We know Saggy, we know. You've told your Horrible Concert Vehicular Homicide story at least forty three times. Misty's Corpse interrupted you the forty- fourth time and I missed the ending though.
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Same thing happened to me at a Bar Mitzvah last week. They were carrying around some kid on a chair and I'm like, "Cool! I wanna be carried too!" So I step on the gas and figure they'll pick my car up when I get to them, but the selfish jerks just split and dropped the kid. Little bastard ruined my fender and messed up my paint job pretty bad. I'm still waiting on the check from his parents to fix my car.
2011-02-16 [Araglas]: *burps*
2011-02-16 [djxmonster]: I'm hungry....
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: And you'll be bleeding too if you don't stop asking for food. Now get back in your cellar!
2011-02-16 [djxmonster]: hmpf
*trudges away*
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what I thought! *combs his amazing mustache*... waaaiiiit... I don't have a mustache...... *slowly reaches for a knife on the counter*
2011-02-16 [Nekko fox]: Hey now, let me do that for you Mort.


*Blithely starts cutting off Mort's eyebrows*
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Thanks, much better! *goes back to combing his amazing mustache*
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: ...waaaiiiit a second...
2011-02-16 [Nekko fox]: *Scuttles off making like Zoidberg, making the trademark 'Curly' noise*
2011-02-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-16 [God]: Interesting. Guess we all face disappointments in our offspring. *combs his mustache-teeth*
2011-02-16 [Pillowthief]:   
2011-02-16 [God]: Trick questiuon. I AM Patrick Swayze.
2011-02-16 [God]: Bitches.
2011-02-16 [God]: I think that's Patrick Swayze, anyways. Maybe it's Brian Boitano. That's Ok with me too.
2011-02-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I know what you mean. My own son is a constant source of disappointment to me.


*Mort Jr. rolls around in his crib and cries*


GET A JOB!!
2011-02-16 [Nekko fox]: Mort, don't yell at him, it accomplishes nothing. Either beat him, shake him vigorously, or give him a bottle of cognac to swill.
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-17 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-17 [Pillowthief]: I think Im up for burning then.
2011-02-17 [Pillowthief]: No, Abendigo! Noooooooo......! Dammit. It was my turn.
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up and get in the oven, Shadrach!
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   



  

2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   



  

2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   



  




  




  




  

2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-17 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *is very amused by the comic strips* :D
2011-02-17 [Nekko fox]: HEY, NO AMUSEMENT ALLOWED! THOSE GAMES SUPPORTED ANIMAL ABUSE FOR MONETARY GAIN!
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-17 [God]: As the years go on, I find myself more and more, wanting to kill the thing I created.
2011-02-17 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-02-18 [Sheamus Finn]: And thus Were-mutts were born......
2011-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Not cool, man! I think they prefer to be called "Hispanic-Americans" these days...
2011-02-18 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Same goes for Misty.
2011-02-19 [Pillowthief]: Hambeasts are not supposed to get the same treatment as werebeasts, ever since The State of Michigan vs John Hadley in 1998 where John was complaining of stereotypes and people lumping werewolves and Misty in the same category.


Obviously we're just supposed to chop hambeasts into manageable sizes then set them on fire without any further ado. 
2011-02-19 [Sheamus Finn]: My question is this why the wheel? They drive him some where? Play Wheel-O-Wacking or something? Roll him down a hill or some stairs?
2011-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, have you ever tied a werewolf up to a triangle? It just looks ridiculous. Plus, a wheel makes it easier to carry him from the courtroom to the beheading grounds (it's just down the hill, by the gas station).
2011-02-19 [Sheamus Finn]: No just an octagon....and the Pentagon too...
2011-02-19 [Pillowthief]: But what about Otacon?!?
  

2011-02-19 [Nekko fox]: They took care of Otacon.


  

2011-02-19 [Nekko fox]:   



  




  

2011-02-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-19 [River Fox]: SO there is lot of stuff here to eat BUT(big but) can you dig it? no seriosusly Cccaaannn Yyyyooouuuu Dddiiiggg IIITTTT!?!?!
2011-02-19 [Nekko fox]: Quiet River, the only one's digging here are the minors.


*He throws toaster crumbs into a pit near the back of the kitchen to feed the coal-covered children working the mines*
2011-02-20 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-02-20 [Sheamus Finn]: I wonder if her personal defense system would work for me.
"Bad mugger, no mugging!, Bad mugger no mugging!" lol
2011-02-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-20 [Fruit Loops]: #15 ftw, BooBies !
2011-02-20 [God]: #22 I can see my house from here!
2011-02-20 [twitchboy]: ripped from collegehumor. ....win =D 
2011-02-20 [Nekko fox]: Wrong again Twitchy. Macromeme. Now, whether it came from Collegehumor first or not is moot, I snagged the image from macromeme. Also, the potatoes are gaining sentience. Grown by Cyberdyne, they will take up arms and launch the leeks to destroy humanity!
2011-02-20 [twitchboy]: i appreciate the same article though....is funny
2011-02-21 [Sheamus Finn]: Does that mean that mashed potatoes would be the T-1000's?
2011-02-21 [Nekko fox]: FUCK YOU SHEAMUS! Obviously, they would be the specialized flying robots.
2011-02-21 [Mortified Penguin]: As long as it's the potatoes this time. I can't handle another attack from those killer tomatoes.
2011-02-21 [Fruit Loops]: loads up the sour cream and bacon bits gun
2011-02-21 [Nekko fox]: Oh Fruit Loop, don't be naive. Those don't do anything besides anger your new Spud Overlords.
2011-02-21 [Fruit Loops]: Gives the command to launch the InterContinentalButterMissles ! After thoose hit the secreat weapons will be unleashed ...Millions of impoverished people Starving for Potatoes !!! Armed with Deadly Potatoe Forks and even Deadlier Appetites for Potatoe Destruction !
2011-02-21 [Fruit Loops]: We've been following the spuds for quite some time, thanx to our man on the inside :   
2011-02-21 [Nekko fox]: Little did you know, HE'S A DOUBLE AGENT! He's been feeding you false information! FOR YOUR IGNORANCE YOU HAVE DOOMED US ALL! Butter does nothing but power their reserve reactors via osmosis! Million of impoverished, starving people? THEY HAVE ADAPTED POISON INTO THEMSELVES! Forks? Anti-skewer technology. These are the most advanced spuds EVER TO BE BIRTHED FROM THE WOMB OF PURE EVIL....














Denny's.














And now, because of you, they are unstoppable.


EXCEPT HERE AT BOB'S DINER! Come in on Thursday and Watch the Apocalypse and enjoy our Thursday Special, Super Spud Sandwiches and Soup with Side Salad of Savory Salsa Salami.
2011-02-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: http://infinitedawn111.blogspot.com/ Random/silly project in its infancy..if anyone wants to add anything or likes it I'd love to know :p
2011-02-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I knew that potatoes had eyes.. And they said I was just being paranoid!
2011-02-22 [Fruit Loops]: He may be a double agent which is why we injected him with a virulent strain of the infamous Potatoe Famine! As host he has now infected the entire evil potatoe population! I'm sorry by now the virus has activated and laid the species to waste.
2011-02-22 [Fruit Loops]: Only the docile Idaho's will survive to repopulate the world.
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: Fool, with their advanced nanotechnology (powered by Swedish dollars, of course) that virus strain is no more powerful than badly turned soil. Face it. You cannot win. SUBMIT TO YOUR SPUD OVERLORDS.
2011-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in eating potato chips*... whut'd I miss?
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: Not much, Fruit is just talking about how he is engineering a virus that kills your crop of potatoes. You know, the ones that control our government, markets, public and foreign affairs, global corporations, finances, police, satellite communication, education, faculty staffing, publishing, industry, and all major and minor utilities for the public, the ones that if they died our entire world would shut down and grind to a halt.


I hear it makes good fettuccine though.
2011-02-22 [Majestical]: lol... funny photo shopping. Thanks Bob.
2011-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MY POTATOES! *snaps a carrot in half*


Don't you mess with my potato crops, boy! *potato starts gnawing at my kneecap* YOU LITTLE BASTARD. *kicks it into the ceiling fan*... *delicious french fries fall from the ceiling*...
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: WHOO FREE AIR!


*Mentally increases the bill of all the customers who eat the french fries by 30%*
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: *He then charges for air, citing inflated rates and importation costs as well as levee fees*
2011-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Plus shipping and handling... *handles air*...
2011-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Not to mention many, many processing fees. In fact... *takes out a pen, paper, and a calculator*... let's see... carry the one... divide by the square of the sum of both integers... add the third column... no, wait, that's the itemization fee... *attempts to erase a stray mark*... *becomes frustrated and opens fire on several patrons with a rifle*...
2011-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait, crap. This isn't my air formula calculation form... these are my taxes... *wads up taxes and throws them out back*... *the IRS burst in and repossess Misty's face with a hatchet*...
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-22 [Sheamus Finn]: I have to disagree on one thing "the first tragedy" Transformers the movie when Prime died....granted he came back like 20 times.
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: Transformers were 1980's.


2011-02-22 [Sheamus Finn]: Well, some of us bridge that generational gap thingy....lol. (looks down) It was tragic for me...(lol)
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: Don't put your secondary thoughts into bracket, and you did not laugh any louder than a curt chuckle to yourself. QUIT DECEIVING YOURSELF.


*Cudgels one of the new kids that walked in with his family*
2011-02-22 [Pillowthief]: WHY ARE THERE NO LIONO REFERENCES? (HOOOO!)
2011-02-22 [Nekko fox]: BECAUSE LIONO HATES A SHY BITCH. +↓∟↔←Hoooo↓♫*◄
2011-02-22 [Fruit Loops]: Thunder...
2011-02-22 [Fruit Loops]: THunder...
2011-02-22 [Fruit Loops]: THUUNDERCATS HOOOOOOOOO!
2011-02-22 [Fruit Loops]: Oh shit i gotta post a youtube link lol : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oYdD38lnqQE
2011-02-22 [Pillowthief]:    Sad.
Try this! - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pKpBLp5L9KM
2011-02-23 [Fruit Loops]: whats sad about thundercats !?
2011-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: They were all spayed and neutered?
2011-02-23 [Pillowthief]: I was more commenting on you Troll Link ineptness. My Thundercats Weather Troll (r) blows yours out of the water. *Pillowthief picks up Dice Cup!* *Pillowthief rolls Dice Cup!* 4d20, biotch. You lose. No saves.
2011-02-23 [God]: *God seems to be drunk this morning*
2011-02-23 [Pillowthief]: Quiet God! We all know you're inept.
2011-02-23 [God]: *God "ineptly" strikes Pillowthief with a thunderbolt*
2011-02-23 [God]: *God preemptly strikes Mortified penguin with a thunderbolt, because he's omnipotent and knows that he's going to say something witty and in poor humor*
2011-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *is violently destroyed*... *says nothing witty and in poor humor*... *decomposes in the soup*...
2011-02-24 [twitchboy]: silly mort god cant hurt the advanced technology available to Scientologists and their alien spirits
2011-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, shut up! I'm trying to be dead here! *smacks twitchboy around*... *goes back to decomposing in the soup*...
2011-02-24 [Pillowthief]: I can't imagine Mort as a Scien-Lol-ogist.
2011-02-24 [twitchboy]: *rubbs gumby like skin where smacked* why not he was abducted that one time. if you listen you can still here his lower intestine beep.
2011-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Xenu damn it! *punches lower intestine... not mine, but Misty's*
2011-02-24 [Sheamus Finn]: I have a jammer to block that signal.....$200.
2011-02-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hold on... *passes Go*...


*ends up buying a damn railroad with the money instead*
2011-02-24 [Ninja Smurf]: *collects $200 from Mort for an underwater railroad located in the middle of the Sahara*
2011-02-24 [twitchboy]: *broke the game and devided by zero, ninja goes straight to jail*
2011-02-24 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: who is Bob? And can I experiment on him? I need a decent subject to create a hybrid of omelet making proportions!
2011-02-24 [Nekko fox]: Quiet infinity. Speak not against the glory and all-knowing power of Bob.
2011-02-24 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Bob? Bob? Bo-ob?
2011-02-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-02-24 [Nekko fox]: Little did you know, that is in fact a portrait of Bob and his Portable Atrocities. He's ever the gentleman.
2011-02-25 [Pillowthief]: I thought Bob was younger. Didn't he just get carded for smokes the other day?
2011-02-25 [Fruit Loops]: Isnt Bob supposed to be a man with no arms and no legs ?
2011-02-25 [Araglas]: I though bob was a Mountain?
2011-02-25 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You are all wrong. Bob is me. Fact.
2011-02-25 Bob: We are /b/ob.
2011-02-25 [nokaredes]: Whoa. New graphics!
2011-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, we at Bob's Diner quite enjoy being graphic. F*ck sh*t g*at!
2011-02-25 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: bob is hot in all his salty goodness. *end of transmission*
2011-02-26 [Fruit Loops]: Cuts off Infinity Hypothosis's arms and legs! looks for fuck shit goat on the menu ?
2011-02-26 [Pillowthief]: Attention. I would very much like you all to know that I've recently had sex with a stripper. She was female. It was awesome. No, she probably doesnt have a soul. Thank you, that is all.
2011-02-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Cuts off Fruit Loop's vital organs BEFORE he gets a chance to cut off her arms & legs*
2011-02-26 [Sheamus Finn]: Wonder why everyone is using knives? *pulls out his pistol*
2011-02-27 [Pillowthief]: *Pulls out his gun-blade* Drop it sucka!
2011-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out his blade-gun*... *launches knives at Pillowthief's stripper*
2011-02-27 [Fruit Loops]: /me Gives Pillowthief a certificate: Lifetime Achievement Award "Congratulations! You Fucked A Stripper!"
2011-02-27 [Pillowthief]: *gets a papercut* GODDMAMIT!
2011-02-27 [God]: *Strikes Pillowthief with lightning*
2011-02-27 [Pillowthief]: I was recently asked, "Y so seriuos?" It made me start thinking, Y AM I so seriuos?
2011-02-27 [Fruit Loops]: ask's god for millions of dollars ?
2011-02-27 [Pillowthief]: Don't you know? God never answers selfish requests. The bastard.
2011-02-28 [Fruit Loops]: Its not selfish :/, i need funds to implement my ideas for the betterment of humanity.
2011-02-28 [Nekko fox]: Quiet Fruitcake. Enough selfishness out you!
2011-02-28 [Fruit Loops]:   
2011-02-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in, eating some bacon*


Hey, thanks for this bacon I asked for, God. Oh, and thanks for paying off my gambling debts and aborting that hooker's baby for me. I wasn't sure if it was mine or not, but I didn't want to take the risk.
2011-02-28 [God]: No problem, man. I knocked up a hooker once too, so I know how you feel...


*strikes Pillowthief with lightening*
2011-02-28 [Fruit Loops]: Ahhh so that explains where jesus came from !
2011-02-28 [Pillowthief]: Agh! WTF Jesus! Put your father on a leash!
2011-02-28 [Jesus]: Yeah! Fuck you dad! Im emo now and I don't care what you say! I'll get a piecing and tattoos if I want to!
2011-02-28 [Pillowthief]: That's.... not what I meant.
2011-02-28 [God]: *Strikes Jesus with lightning*
2011-02-28 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: My Toby jugs are better than yours. Even you, jesus.
2011-03-01 [Pillowthief]: Im not sure how to respond to that.
2011-03-01 [Fruit Loops]: Demands to see said jugs !
2011-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I've got some topless jugs right here for you... *points at some milk jugs with their lids off*...
2011-03-01 [Nekko fox]: Dawn broke, and my head felt heavier than lead. The blanket of fuzz and crust on my teeth told me that the evening before was a hum-dinger of a party, but I was disappointed to see that I had failed to lure a pretty little something into bed with me. Pity.


Despite my lack of charismatic persuasion, I felt like the day was starting off better than usual. Of course, that was moments before I, bleary-eyed and groaning about the drum solo playing in my head, slipped on a discarded shoe and tumbled ass over breakfast down the stairs before sliding to a stop in front of my front door. I spat blood from my mouth, working my tongue over a tooth that felt loose. I swore quietly to myself and rolled onto my back with a disenchanted groan. A glance to my right led me to discover that the mailman had stopped by and politely deposited the mail through the door slot. Mail that contained this month's demand for rent, car payment, phone, insurance, and some other envelopes which I can only assume were shat from the bowels of Satan himself. My mood continued to darken as I sat up only to watch my cat, Bastard, urinating on the partner of the offending shoe that I had slipped on upstairs.


I found out at that moment that cats do in fact have expressions, aside from the oh-so-common snide tail flick. Bastard looked very pleased with himself, contented even, and his self-satisfaction seemed direct at me. As if his joy was malicious, intentional. In my minds eye, I pictured the cat achieving flight with the kind assistance of my foot. Rather than make the dream a reality, I stood with a groan and stepped around the growing puddle of feline piss, aiming my anger instead at a pot of coffee. In retrospect, I feel bad for that coffee pot, it didn't do anything to deserve the horrors that I inflicted upon it that morning.


As I stood next to my sink and a stack of mouldering dishes, weeks old, I let my gaze wander into the backyard of my home. Behind the yard was a chain link fence that separated the yard from the alley in the back, and leaning against that fence was an man who looked surprisingly like Sean Connery. He was leisurely smoking a cigarette and blowing the smoke straight up into the icy January air. The man glanced back and made eye contact with me, winked, and started blowing perfect smoke rings.


Asshole. That was the only word that crossed my mind. And, because I have less backbone than most primordial fish, I simply stared and called him names in my head. After a few minutes of torturing the vagabond in my mind, side-by-side with my feline, Bastard, I turned away and pulled one of the few remaining coffee cups from my shelves and poured myself some coffee. When I glanced back outside, the Sean Connery look-alike had disappeared. Shaking my head, I left the kitchen, coffee in hand and promptly stepped in Bastard's puddle.
2011-03-01 [Jewl]: The best part of that whole thing was that your cat was named Bastard.
2011-03-01 [God]: Quiet Jew! I require sacrifices! Where'd Abraham go? He's always up for a good ol' Old Testament sacrifice...
2011-03-01 [Nekko fox]: Abraham is off in town peeing on the homeless. He said he'll back in an hour to stab some shit for you.
2011-03-01 [God]: Damn. Issac just texted me, he's in Nebraska. Guess we'll just have to cut up some lamb.
2011-03-01 [Nekko fox]: Out of lamb. We just have the distilled essence of tortured orphans.
2011-03-02 [Fruit Loops]: Offers himself up for a virgin sacrafice :)
2011-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, right! We saw what you did to that fish!


But regardless, we don't waste food here. I'm sure the gentleman at table 7 doesn't mind... *points at a guy on the floor, violently convulsing and screaming*... See? He's fine.
2011-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes his wallet*... hmm... nice wife. Certainly better than mine. I'll be right back... *grabs his wife catching net off the wall*...
2011-03-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts back in*


HAND OVER THE GOLD! *stabs Misty*


HAND IT OVER! I'M NOT GONNA WARN YOU AGAIN!!


*continues stabbing Misty's corpse*
2011-03-02 [Jesus]: *kills a fig tree*
2011-03-02 [Pillowthief]: MY TREE! MY BEAUTIFUL TREE!
2011-03-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: wtf-how can you kill a tree!? I LOVE trees. I am married to a funky little Rowan. *Hugs every tree that she sees* Mm..OO..Mmm 
2011-03-02 [God]: *Kills Highpantyhoses' first born. Sends a plague of locust to punish their native land and peoples. Rains sulfur and frogs from the sky* WHY WONT YOU WORSHIP ME?!?
2011-03-02 [Pillowthief]: *sulfur melts the remains of the locust eaten stump of a fig tree* Oh. Actually, it seems that that was my neighbor's tree. MY tree, it's over there. *Points at tree as sunlight spontaneously breaks from the clouds of frogs to momentarily light said tree*
2011-03-02 [Pillowthief]: By the way, god- I met Loki and Bartlebe. They're kinda dicks.
2011-03-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Pees on gods head and runs away giggling insanely*
2011-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *cuts down Pillowthief's holy tree for firewood*... *realizes we have no fireplace*... *tosses the tree out back into Bob's Olympic Sized Swimming Pool/Corpse Depository*...
2011-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Your move, God.


♖♘♗♕♔♗♘♖
♙♙♙♙♙♙♙♙
               ♟
♟♟♟♟♟   ♟♟
♜♞♝♛♚♝♞♜
2011-03-03 [God]: Hmm... Take this!


♖♘♗♕♔♗♘♖
♙♙♙♙♙♙♙♙
             ☠
              ♟
♟♟♟♟♟   ♟♟
♜♞♝♛♚♝♞♜
2011-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Y-you can't do that! That's not a valid move!
2011-03-03 [God]:
☝


I think I know how to play checkers! I invented the universe!
2011-03-03 [Chuck Norris]: Actually, the universe thing was totally me. *roundhouse kicks [@46825] in the face!*
2011-03-03 [Chuck Norris]: That's right. I even created god on ET.
2011-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2011-03-03 [Fruit Loops]: i wonder whats going to happen when chuck norris dies
2011-03-03 [Fruit Loops]: will the whole world unite for one solemn moment, before returning back to chaos ? Will there be riots !? WHat ! WHAT WILL HAPPEN !?!?
2011-03-03 [Fruit Loops]: lol like the show life after people, go from region to region city to city showing how life would be like without chuck norris..how after a relatively short time the buildings would start to crumble and plants and animals would take over !
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   






You're dead to me.
2011-03-03 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: ????
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



YOU HEARD ME SLANDERER. I SAY THIS TO YOU SKATE HARD OR DIE
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



WHY MUST YOU CAUSE SUCH DYSFUNCTION AMONGST US?!
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



THIS BABY IS GLEEFULLY BURNING FOR YOUR SINS...AND OUR DINNER.
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



I gotta admit though, that's a fine rack of baby back ribs. Heh.
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



BUT STILL, THIS IS YOUR FAULT SKATE PUNK.
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



IF I COULD I WOULD BEAT YOU TO WITHIN AN INCH OF YOUR LIFE.
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



I would like that. A lot.
2011-03-03 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: Thats Good I Like It!!


Your Alright Nekko Fox!!
2011-03-03 [I'm Ol' Skool Coz I Know I Am]: OOOO And Some On Those Ribs
I'm Famished ^^
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:    I'm looking at your name
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



Heeeeeee.
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



BUT ENOUGH PLEASANTRIES! TO BATTLE!


*Proceeds to beat Misty's horribly bloated corpse with the flaming baby. Misty's giant fat reserves ignite her like an acetylene torch that scorches through the majority of the customers and the film crew that were documenting this event for posterity*
2011-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *half of a screaming camera man crawls up to the register*... "PLEASE... HELP MEEE!!"


Yeah, I'm on break, buddy.


"OH GOD, IT HURTS SO MUCH!!"


Hey, listen, pal. Do I show up at your job with entrails dripping on the floor and start yelling at you? No? Then cut it out. It's rude.


"AAAAAHHHHHH!!!" *he coughs up blood and a piece of kidney*


*puts in headphones and starts jamming out to death metal/polka*... *props feet up on the register and plays an air guitar*...
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]: *Steps over the exploded remnants of the spokeswoman, her glassy eyes partially boiled from her skull-charred face. He starts serving the remaining terrified customers meals that they didn't order*
2011-03-03 [Chuck Norris]: On my birthday, I dont grow older. I just gain another year on my existence. This sucks for you.
2011-03-03 [Nekko fox]:   



SHUT UP CHUCK. LAST TIME I CHECKED YOU WERE GETTING RAPED BY EPIC BEARD MAN, SO GO SIT IN YOUR CORNER.
2011-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Stay out of my corner!
2011-03-04 [Duke Devlin]: Last comment three hours ago? Mort, you need to get back in charge, Turkey is doing a shite-tastic job.
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Duke, you tramp! You haven't been here in years.


And I am in charge again. And I take great offense to that. *slaps Nekko with a glove*
2011-03-04 [Duke Devlin]: LIES. I was here a tiny bit last year. Besides, I'm still Sheriff.
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know if we can afford a sheriff in this economy. But I suppose if we slashed Pillowthief's pension in half, we might could make room in the budget for one... *gets sword off the wall*... *slashes Pillowthief's pension/ankles*...
2011-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *Takes Mort's glove whilst busy*


We don't need no stinkin' sheriff ain't NO HOW!


*Takes Duke and promptly crams him into Misty's charred ,lumpy corpse along with the glove and shoves it all into the corner*
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: My glove! Now how will I challenge people to duels?!


*summons Blue-Eyes*... *having nobody to duel with, he destroys the diner*...
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: At least I've still got the right one though.



2011-03-04 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: #Glove slap. Bebeh its the glove slap# Honey you can glove slap me anytime..
2011-03-04 [Pillowthief]: Forget the crummy glove! My pension/ankles!
2011-03-04 [Pillowthief]: Oh. Actually, it seems to have been my neighbor's pension/ankles. MY pensions is over there. *Points at pension as sunlight spontaneously breaks from the clouds of frogs to momentarily light said pension*
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *cuts down Pillowthief's holy pension for firewood*... *realizes we have no fireplace*... why do I keep forgetting that...? *tosses the pension out back in Bob's Olympic Sized Tennis Court/Rape Pad*...
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: That Rape Pad really paid for itself after the first two months.
2011-03-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Or so I thought. But that bill collector keeps insisting I "pay" him "money"...
2011-03-04 [Araglas]: *hides pension in misty's corpse*
2011-03-04 [Fruit Loops]: shits golden poops
2011-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *Gives Misty's corpse to Mort's bill colector, who is immediately swallowed in the mawing chasm that is the blubbery folds of her face*
2011-03-04 [Fruit Loops]: did she eat herself to death.. like pizza the hut ?
2011-03-05 [Sheamus Finn]: or perhaps in sections?
2011-03-05 [Pillowthief]: Great. Now I have Misty all over my pension/ankles.
2011-03-05 [Araglas]: ...*steals all the pensions and hides them in Nekko's dancing shoes*
2011-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: You people are weird. I'm taking my son and going for a walk... come on, Mort Jr.! *picks up a baby and leaves*


Wait, this isn't my son... *drop kicks the baby into traffic*... I don't even have a son! I guess I'll just walk alone then...


Wait, these aren't my legs... *drop kicks the legs into traffic*... I don't even have legs! *rolls his chair back into the diner*
2011-03-05 [Nekko fox]: See ya guys, I'm off to go dancing with Mort.


Mort? What happened to those legs I lent you? AND WHY IS THERE MISTY IN MY DANCE SHOES?


*Throws them in the soup along with one of Mort's arm, for 'substance', because Mort is a substance abuser*


And don't deny it Mort, I saw Meth the other day, covered in bruises, and Cocaine's black eye.
2011-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Cocaine knows what she did.
2011-03-05 [Fruit Loops]: The new spokesperson for the columbian cartel :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wowy-EdU4Eg
2011-03-05 [Sheamus Finn]: He does a line and tells everyone to "Get Out!"
2011-03-05 [Chuck Norris]: Actually, Arnold, those are MY tortillas.
2011-03-05 [Pablo Francisco]: There will be action!
2011-03-05 [Arnold Schwarzenegger]: GET DOWNE!
2011-03-05 [Pablo Francisco]: Twice the action!
2011-03-05 [Arnold Schwarzenegger]: GET DOWNE AGAIN!
2011-03-06 [Sheamus Finn]: Come with me if you want to score...
2011-03-06 [Duke Devlin]: Don't you be disrespectin' me, Nekko! And I am not a male! *throws over 9000 molotov's at Nekko*
2011-03-06 [Nekko fox]: *watches as the over 9000 molotovs sputter harmlessly and die before smashing on the orphanage, before promptly bursting into flames despite lacking an ignition source. He then fuses a penis to Duke Devlin, and smacks them for having a gender-obscure name like "Duke" which refers to males, and "Devlin", an male Irish name meaning "Fierce courage",making it obvious that they MUST be a male, or at least a crappy thrower of molotovs*
2011-03-06 [Pillowthief]: She's got a point.
2011-03-07 [Avoral]: I want Godzilla egs.
2011-03-07 [Pillowthief]: Dont change the subject you dirty eg lover!
2011-03-07 [Araglas]: *is lost in the maze of misty's entrails*
2011-03-07 [Nekko fox]: Shut up Pillow, you were the one who was making huge penis jokes about Duke behind it's back.
2011-03-07 [Pillowthief]: C'mon, seriously? Those were funny. Especially the one about the black rabbi and the monkey.
2011-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait, I thought that was the one about Misty's parents?
2011-03-07 [Avoral]: Ahahahaha. Wow.
I really did call it an 'eg.' That's outstanding.
I still want some Godzilla egs.
2011-03-07 [Pillowthief]: It WAS about Mistys parents. And stop trying to change the subject, you and your damn egs! *Eats Avorals ovaries. For breakfast*
2011-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Eats Avorals other ovaries. For breakfast. Without any milk.*
2011-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *Nigger nigger nigger my nigger nigger. Bike.*
2011-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I... I don't know what you're talking about... *hides bike behind the corpse pile*
2011-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Surrender your sap, tree! *prods Mort's face with metal tubing*
2011-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: My tree face! *oozes tree oil*


Take nekko instead! He's a sweet, supple, sultry sapling, swollen with succulent sap!
2011-03-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Fool! Your alliteration is no match for my illiteration! *pools owt a soord*... *stabs yer fayce*... *iz viktorius in whatevr it iz im triying too acomplush hear*...
2011-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *dies in a puddle of his own sap*


What a sappy ending... *eats ramen*...
2011-03-08 [Nekko fox]: What a bunch of hams.
2011-03-08 [Jewl]: What a bunch of pigs.
2011-03-08 [kians mummy]: hi everyone
2011-03-08 [Sheamus Finn]: Cops? Where? *hides his house arrest anklet, then whistles innocently*
2011-03-08 [kians mummy]: what a pack of bacon
2011-03-08 [Pillowthief]: *fires bacon into the asteroid belt* Take that asteroids! *Atari game bleeps angrily*
2011-03-08 [kians mummy]: *then bacon comes back and hits you in the face* ahhhhhh
2011-03-08 [Pillowthief]: Stupid Atari! Wait. Actually, this bacon is quite good. Om nom nom. *Atari bleeps annoyingly*
2011-03-08 [kians mummy]: *then you realise bacon is red worms stook to one another* (lol)
2011-03-08 [Nekko fox]: *Fishes using the bacon worms, and casts the line. He hooks Sexy Horny Baby Girl's jowls and drags her through the diner, through the broken glass, through the spilled entrails of eviscerated orphans, through the solidifying Misty-Lard (Now Availble, 100% Unfiltered at Bob's Diner for a LIMITED TIME ONLY!), through the screaming zombie pirate ninjas kept in the basement for gambling purposes, and finally through Mort's armpit though no reasonable conclusion as to why this is could be established. He looks at the mucked up, bloody, gouged carcass he lined in, shrugged and tosses her into the soup*


Hey, who took my Atari out of the packaging?! IT WAS MINT CONDITION UNOPENED!


*Breaks down and weeps manly tears into the soup as he stirs it and serves it to the curiously full diner. You'd think they'd know better by now*
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: They probably would know better if the soup didn't give them spontaneous amnesia/Alzheimer's/dementia/herpes.


But it does.


So they don't.


*plays with Atari*
2011-03-09 [Pillowthief]: *Atari bleeps worriedly*
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, Atari! Do you want to end up like NES? Do you?!! *points at a pile of wires in the corner*
2011-03-09 [Pillowthief]: Haha- Wait.




Is that what happened to my NES? You said it had gotten cholera!
2011-03-09 [Nekko fox]: *is busy urinating on the wires*


Well, it has cholera NOW.
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: And AIDS!
2011-03-09 [kians mummy]: and crabs
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: And even lobsters!


Nekko, I suspect you should stop cuddling animal corpses.
2011-03-09 [kians mummy]: and even worms


god damn your catchy
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Yyyyeah, those are actually my worms. I don't know how they keep escaping...
2011-03-09 [kians mummy]: lol ha ha
2011-03-09 [kians mummy]: [Mortified Penguin]


may i ask if i can make an anouncment for my new wiki sci fi & fantasy books
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: No, you may not ask. You may, however, make the announcement.


But so help me, God... if you ask... *slowly reaches for a knife*... *pulls out a fork instead*... *eats ramen*...
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of which, I once came upon a fork in the road. I stood for hours, pondering which path to take. Eventually, it became apparent that it was actually a spoon. I laughed heartily, went home, and violently beat my children.
2011-03-09 [Flisky]: For shame, Mort. You should have beaten your children's mother for spawning such monstrosities. Then beat yourself for letting her.
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I would have, but as it would later turn out, they weren't my children. I probably should have noticed it earlier, to be honest. For one thing, they were Asians. For another, I don't recall ever procreating.


But our father/child bond is too strong for such meaningless frivolities like "blood kin" and "restraining orders". I still stop by from time to time to lecture them on important lessons, like proper hygiene, being polite, and how to safely remove the glass of shattered beer bottles that has been lodged in their skull because THEY FORGOT THE DAMN MAYO ON MY SANDWICH AGAIN.
2011-03-09 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-09 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I got banned from Yahoo! Answers several years ago... apparently rape jokes posted in Home & Garden is "offensive" somehow.


...*eats ramen*... *runs out of ramen*... *orders more ramen*...
2011-03-09 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-03-09 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-09 [Nekko fox]: Sorry about the Mayo. I've been sending your children mental images in their dreams of them no longer giving you mayo for some pre-existing heart condition you don't actually have.


*Telepathically tries to set Misty's bloated corpse on fire, but "accidentally" catches [kians mummy] on fire instead*


Eh, close enough.
2011-03-09 [Jenny Crank]: I'm a pretty sick individual..but rape isnt funny.
2011-03-09 [Sheamus Finn]: *roasts a marshmellow over the sci fi and fantasy libarian*
2011-03-10 [Avoral]: Pedobear is.
2011-03-10 [Nekko fox]: What are you talking about Jenny Crank? Rape is HILARIOUS! Look at that clown! See how happy he is? See how excited and chipper he is to be passing on this fact that women are being raped every year? I bet he raped his share of women. And you know what? I bet THEY thought it was hilarious too! EVEN PEDOBEAR GOT IN ON THE ACTION! Of course, you do realize, these women wouldn't be getting raped if they stayed in the kitchen, making sandwiches like they're supposed to. So, are you saying that these women don't know their place or don't have senses of humor?


*Grinds up Mort's ramen into an opaque liquid, pours it into an IV bag and shoves a hypodermic needle into Mort's arm to make the process more efficient. He then gets some marshmallows and roasts them on Sheamus Finn who inexplicably has flaming hair that they haven't noticed yet. He realizes that the hypodermic needle is connected to a tube that is not connected to anything, and so Mort is spraying crimson everywhere like some macabre caricature of humanity stuck with an unblocked hypodermic needle originally meant to be connected to an intravenous drip bag filled with pureed ramen*
2011-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: MY LEG!! You're a terrible aim! *takes heroine needle out of his arm and replaces it with ramen/unblocked hypodermic needle*
2011-03-10 [Avoral]: AUGH
Not another one of those macabre caricatures of humanity stuck with an unblocked hypodermic needle originally meant to be connected to an intravenous drip bag filled with pureed ramen.
I hate those.
2011-03-10 [Avoral]: New slogan: Bob's Diner. We put the rape in your grapefruit.
2011-03-10 [Avoral]: Also in therapeutic, cameraperson, skyscraper, and trapezoid.
2011-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: We also put the 'rape' in the 'unpaid interns just trying to get credits for college even though no college actually accepts Bob's Diner as a real restaurant and even if they did I don't know why they're trying to get credits from a restaurant, because that doesn't even make sense, nobody goes to college to get a degree in restaurant working, so their efforts are completely in vain, but I'm not going to be the one to tell them that, are you? no, I didn't think so, now shut up and get back in the oven'.
2011-03-10 [Nekko fox]: So, a man runs over his wife, who's fault is it?


It's the man's fault, obviously. He shouldn't be driving in the kitchen.


This joke prompted by Mort's Megoplex Race Tetrahedron set up by his wife's oven.


*watches as several driver's take a corner too hard, clip forty customers and Mort's wife, Jenny Crank, and Misty's bloated, leaking corpse, and swerve off with a delicate spray of blood that coats the fresh pastries like no powdered sugar ever could. They are an instant success and people are positively dying to try them*
2011-03-10 [Jenny Crank]: First of all, as you know there are no women on the internet and what the fuck is all this talk of sandwhiches when its clearly "Tits or back in the kitchen" if you're gonna act like an internet tard know your goddamn roots. Now of course anyone who knows me would say I'm a 21 year old female piercer and suspension artist but am truly a 40 something fat bald man who spends my many internet hours in dives like this one.
2011-03-10 [Nekko fox]: It's TITS or GTFO, not kitchen, and you forgot to capitalize. Sandviches are made in the kitchen. Roots is full of niggers, and they new nothing of Sandviches. Piercings are simply tagging marks so that men can keep track of their cattle, er, women, that way other men don't rustle up the other men's women. And besides, suspension art is for people who are too big of hipsters to stay on the ground, and everyone knows hipsters are the emos of the internet, and emos are this generation's hippy, and a hippy is making syrup in the backroom out of old diesel fuel we scraped from stains left in that crater we call a parking lot. And who said anyone was being an internet tard? Obviously, we're just trying to serve these kind folks dinner.


*Starts throwing vials of goat urine at people who walked in, that'll teach them to have the gall to oppress this free establishment with their totalitarian affiliations*
2011-03-10 [Nekko fox]: *When they leave he turns back*


And besides, you're memes are as overused as Misty's everything. Obviously you aren't that much of a net tard either, otherwise you would know that women are on the internet now, hence the terminology "cum dumpster" and "camwhore". Are you new here?


*instead of waiting for an answer he puts on shades*


Deal with it. AWWWWW YYYEEEEAAAAHHHH


*Hops into a car and joins the race, crashing immediately into a fruit stand*


FUCKING FRUIT.
2011-03-10 [Fruit Loops]: ...
2011-03-10 [Fruit Loops]: fixes his fruit stand :(
2011-03-10 [Nekko fox]: *Gets back into the semi-demolished racer, backs up over Oprah who was attempting to categorize B's D for a new set of three hundred books she was writing, then takes off again before immediately crashing into the fruit stand again. He gets out and kicks the cart*


FUCKING FRUIT.
2011-03-10 [Jenny Crank]: lol I got what I wanted. Much better kids.
2011-03-10 [Nekko fox]: *Throws fruit at Jenny Crank* Who you calling kid, I'm older than you are.


*The fruit misses and instead rebounds off of the back of Avoral's head, slamming them face first into someone's soup*
2011-03-10 [Mortified Penguin]: FRUIT FIGHT!! *hurls a brick at [Fruit Loops]*
2011-03-10 [Jenny Crank]: *pulls out fruitcakes from 1983* It's on now!
2011-03-10 [Flisky]: *looks up from last weeks newspaper, shakes head, then goes back to newspaper*
2011-03-11 [Sheamus Finn]: *tosses a green potatoe into the fruit fight* I'm irish....
2011-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! We need those for the hash greens.


*is dyslexic*... *punches Famous Shin*...
2011-03-11 [Nekko fox]: Hey, quit punching Seamuf Nish, they don't deserve that!


*kicks Shamed Fan in the marbles*
2011-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: NNOOO!!! My fan! He had just gotten out of jail, after having been caught blowing that guy in public! Speak to me, fan! *it sputters and dies*


Oh. Actually, it seems to have been my neighbor's shamed fan. MY shamed fan is over there. *Points at fan as sunlight spontaneously breaks from the clouds of frogs to momentarily light said fan*
2011-03-11 [Fruit Loops]: must abandoned the fruit selling business after his stand has been utterly destroyed but in an ironic twist of fate starts a fledgling company called "Fruit of the Loom".
2011-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: BOXER FIGHT!! *hurls a doberman at Jenny Crank*
2011-03-11 [Pillowthief]: TV FIGHT!! *Chucks a TV at Jenny Crank*
2011-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Th-that was my microwave. It had my Hot Pockets in it.
2011-03-11 [Jewl]: Are you guys trying to be FJ,/b/, or 4chan?
2011-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: You're a cigarette.
2011-03-11 [Scarekrow]: sssshhhhhhhhh your breaking the first two rules of the internet [Jewl]
2011-03-11 [Nekko fox]: No YOU shut up!


*Breaks Scaredcow in half, attaches the halves to chains, and begins smacking people with the improvised nunchucks. He then throws the lumpy remains at Jewl*


It's dangerous to go alone, take this.
2011-03-11 [Scarekrow]: O>O
2011-03-12 [Delladreing]: I think that was pretty much the most concise answer you were ever going to get @[Jewl] :P
2011-03-12 [Pillowthief]: Your FACE is the only concise answer you were ever going to get.
2011-03-12 [Pillowthief]: *Gains Initiative on [*&!!syntaxerror!!&*] and strikes first comment before they can! {exp +250}*


YOU"RE a cigarette!
2011-03-12 Cigarette: Oh, hey, guys. What's going on?
2011-03-12 [Pillowthief]: *smokes [*&!!syntaxerror!!&*]* Fucker.
2011-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen {health -650}{ramen supply -1}{stomach ulcers +2}*
2011-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: http://greatgatsbygame.com/
2011-03-12 [Delladreing]: ............. O: Mort you have just made mu night <3 *makes you ramen*
2011-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *{health -1200}{stomach ulcers +4}*


*Mort develops cancer*
2011-03-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *the neighborhood children laugh at Mort's condition*... *Mort runs down the slower children with his tractor*...
2011-03-13 [Sheamus Finn]: *hands Mort a flaming crossbow* Kid-ka-bobs?
2011-03-13 [Nekko fox]: Quiet, Ashamus Finn. He doesn't need that.


*Is already passing out spears*
2011-03-13 [Pillowthief]: *quietly refuses spear* Nah, it's ok- I've already got my- THERES ANOTHER ONE! GET HER! *harpoons random pedestrian*


  

2011-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: DANG IT. That fat one really did a number on my grill.


*drives the tractor into a maternity ward, to stop the problem at its source*
2011-03-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *uses toothpicks to harpoon those darned fetuses*
2011-03-13 [Scarekrow]: 
2011-03-13 [Pillowthief]: Quiet Vader. We all know Hitler beat you on the mic. Face it, you can't rap.
2011-03-14 [twitchboy]: http://www.collegehumor.com/video:1931187
i disagree
2011-03-15 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Twitch, don't rip-off college humor.
2011-03-15 [Pillowthief]: Yeah! Rip off Youtube instead, its much cooler! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Kpc499xmeE
2011-03-15 [twitchboy]: awe
2011-03-15 [Nekko fox]: DUDE! Fucking youtube rocks! I hear that if you listen to all the videos at once, backwards, at 77 rpm you can see the face of God as he bites the head off of reason.
2011-03-15 [Mortified Penguin]: It's true. I totally did it one time. It was sort of... anticlimactic. I gave it a thumbs down.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mIm-SHopU8A
2011-03-15 [Nekko fox]: I ain't clicking that. You'll just download my soul and recycle it at a chemical factory of some sort.
2011-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a bad thing?
2011-03-16 [Nekko fox]: Only if you don't want to take up Flamenco dancing!
2011-03-16 [Pillowthief]: 'When in doubt, use fire' I always say. Or was it, 'Tough titties'? Anyways, you weren't using your soul for anything productive so might as well.
2011-03-16 [Nekko fox]: Meh, I already sold it to the hobo next door for access to his box.
2011-03-16 [Pillowthief]: You now have his X-box then? I thought the NES gave it gonisyphiaides.
2011-03-16 [Nekko fox]: Nah, that was the debutant down the road.
2011-03-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, that debutant happened to be my girlfriend for a while. We ended up breaking though, because she kept screaming some other guy's name during sex. That slut. Does anyone know who this "Rape" guy is anyway?
2011-03-17 [Flisky]: Hey, isn't that the homeless guy? Huh...small world.
2011-03-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey yeah! *Proceeds to beat Mort viciously with his own box*


THIS IS FOR COMING TO COLLECT RENT THREE DAYS EARLY!
2011-03-17 [Pillowthief]: Wait, wait. You didnt outright BUY the homeless guy's X-box, you're renting it from Mort?! Does that make Mort the homeless guy? I, for one, would never rent (or buy) any of Mort's box.
2011-03-18 [Fruit Loops]: mort has a sexy fart box ?
2011-03-18 [Mortified Penguin]: You bet your sweet bippy.
2011-03-20 [Nekko fox]: No one is TOUCHING my Sweet Bippy, much less BETTING it! I stole this fair and square!
2011-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll stop touching and betting on your Sweet Bippy when you return my damn fair and my square! I'm not sure how you managed to swindle me out of the deed to that fair, but I want it back!
2011-03-20 [Nekko fox]: Listen Jack, you don't deserve your Damn Fair and Square, you abuse is misuse it every time. I saw you trying to microwave ramen in it last week. Unforgivable! OBVIOUSLY the Damn Fair and Square is meant for baking purposes.
2011-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, well... so is your face! *shoves [Fruit Loops] face first into the oven*


And my ramen needed to be heated. What would you have had me do? Use the Holy Unfair and Circle?! We both know it sucks at heating things! *points at Misty's half heated corpse*
2011-03-20 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-21 [Fruit Loops]: mm its cozy in here
2011-03-21 [Pillowthief]: Actually, it seems the habitat was recently invaded by a weird little Chinese man who seems to have eaten them all. "They were delicious" he was reported to have said, afterwhich France's economy collapsed. Investigations are pending, but officials say that the events are unrelated.


  
   
  

2011-03-21 [kians mummy]:   




to all of you that don't like me
2011-03-21 [Thunder Cid]:   
2011-03-21 [kians mummy]: lol
2011-03-21 Mojo Jojo: Yes, I am mad, because you have made me mad and asking whether or not I am currently mad only perpetuates the madness I am experiencing because of you.
2011-03-21 [kians mummy]: I wash my mojo jojo.
2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, Alice, you druggie.
2011-03-22 [Pillowthief]: Fucking dirty hippies and their insistence that the world is round.
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: My satellite tells me the Earth is more triangular. My satellite also tells me to burn things.
2011-03-22 [Viking]: Your satellite must be controlled by a leprechaun.
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I suspect you are right. That would certainly explain its lust for gold coins and Guinness.
2011-03-22 [Viking]: Odd. Usually the leprechauns prefer Jameson.
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe the satellite has an overpowering urge for Guinness? Satellites usually aren't big on whiskey anyway.
2011-03-22 [kians mummy]:   


i'm an elf
2011-03-22 [djxmonster]: *yawn*
2011-03-22 [djxmonster]:   
2011-03-22 [kians mummy]: *climbs in your mouth*
what a hole
2011-03-22 [kians mummy]: please look at how should elftown change
2011-03-22 [djxmonster]: wait... you just climbed in my mouth? o_O


I'm strangely ok with this...
2011-03-22 [kians mummy]: ha ha, you better be, you have everything in there
2011-03-22 [djxmonster]: Just be careful.... I just had the floors waxed...
2011-03-22 [kians mummy]: lol
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *climbs inside [kians mummy]'s mouth*


Alright, Leonardo DiCaprio. We're two levels deep. We need to find that tooth and plant that filling.


  



2017-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... this image isn't the original "joseph-gordon-levitt-and-leonardo-dicaprio-make-their-move-in-inception.jpg" one it used to be...
2011-03-22 [kians mummy]: ha ha ha, i like that one
2011-03-22 [djxmonster]: oh shit....
2011-03-22 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-22 [kians mummy]:  fuck off
2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   
  

  

  

  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]: AND FUCK OUR CUSTOMERS!


*picks up a bat and start croquet-smacking the month-old rolls at customers, causing serious damage to life, limb and property*
2011-03-22 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Spider-Man is our new manager.


  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   


FUCK YEAH SPIDERMAN.
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Spider-Man makes a great boss.


  

2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: He doesn't run away during B's D's bi-weekly torching. He sticks around, like a real man!


  

2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: He even takes the wrap when the health inspector/FBI shows up. He's just good like that.


  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   



OH GOD I LOVE YOU SPIDERMAN!
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: "I love you too, disturbingly excited citizen!"


  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]: WE LOVE SPIDERMAN!!!!


  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   


Meh...
2011-03-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Haha. You guys make me laugh. You talk a lot of bs, but still..its funny.
2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   


FOOL! I could be a better boss than Spiderman ever could be.


  



And I have a kitty.


2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: You know who has two thumbs and would make a better boss than both of you?


  



This guy!
2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]:   


"Cute, but you can't compare to David Xanatos."
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: "You guys all suck. Besides, didn't you steal 40 cakes, Luthor? That's as many as four tens."



2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: "...And that's terrible."


  

2011-03-22 [Nekko fox]: "I stole a thousand cake factories, carried them via solid gold helicopters to various cities and crashed the factories into orphanages, and then I developed a suit that allowed me to fight stone demons of a bygone era. And you still don't know how to shot web."


  

2011-03-22 [twitchboy]: Best boss in the world
  



second only to
  

because no damn body messes with across without feeling the wrath of lord Ipalazzo and his trap door


(also power rangers....twenty years and there ares till new power rangers)
2011-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Lord Ilpalazzo, Pedro keeps coming back, insisting we give him his severance pay. What should we do?


  

2011-03-23 [Nekko fox]: "I shall ignore thee, Pedro. For all eternity."


  

2011-03-23 [twitchboy]:   
we shall show him the door
2011-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: That's more of a pit than a door though.
2011-03-23 [twitchboy]: trap door
2011-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE A TRAP (DOOR).
2011-03-23 [kians mummy]: your mouths a trap door for an elephant
2011-03-23 [Arnold Schwarzenegger]: YOUR MOMS MOUTH IS A TRAP DOOR FOR AN ELEPHANT!
2011-03-23 [Pillowthief]: YOUR MOMS MOUTH IS A- Hey! I thought we didn't allow Austrians in here anymore...
2011-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: After what happened to Franz, I wasn't sure Austrians would even want to come here anymore... *inexplicably points at a pile of shoes*
2011-03-23 [kians mummy]: thats freaky, why cant i click on his name *confused*
2011-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Because he's the Governator. If he doesn't want you to click his name, you won't be able to click his name.
2011-03-23 [kians mummy]: lol
2011-03-23 Pillowthief: It's true. *Uses mind powers to keep annoying commentators from clicking his name*
2011-03-23 [Mortified Penguin]: WITCHCRAFT.
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]: NIGGERCRAFT.
2011-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Also bad!
2011-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Less crafty though.
2011-03-24 [Sheamus Finn]: uses tons of duct tape
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]: No, that's REDNECKCRAFT. Lots of duct tape. And inbreeding. And dogs. And guns. And guns being inbred with dogs made out of duct tape. Too bad Misty died, she knew ALL about incest REDNIGGERNECKCRAFT. She practically lived it.
2011-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *an inbred gun-dog, wrapped in duct tape, bursts in and explodes*
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]: *Fragments brutally maim random individuals who are promptly gathered up and tossed into pots for eating later*
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]: "Wait, why am I working at B's D again?"


  

2011-03-24 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-24 [kians mummy]: am i mad, i just spent over £90 on a hamster, i'm fucking nuts, god i hope he appreciates it, even though he shits like anything lol
2011-03-24 [kians mummy]: hay, where is the breast milk
2011-03-24 [kians mummy]: and goats milk
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]: "Goats Milk!"


  

2011-03-24 [Thunder Cid]: In response to the previous set of comments.


  

2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]: It's been posted before. By me.


  

2011-03-24 [kians mummy]: a fucking roasting
2011-03-24 [kians mummy]:   
especially the blowing
2011-03-24 [djxmonster]:   
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-24 [kians mummy]: 
2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-24 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-24 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: No, [djxmonster]. It's not Friday yet.
2011-03-25 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-25 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-03-25 [kians mummy]:   
2011-03-25 [kians mummy]:   


i hope you all have a good weekend
2011-03-26 [Nekko fox]:
"The FUCK is a WEEKEND?!"


  

2011-03-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *drives a truck through the window and parks on Misty's corpse*... *starts pumping gas from the gas pump in the kitchen*...
2011-03-26 [Nekko fox]: "Later guys, I'm gonna go walk the sea monster, Fifi. Come on Fifi...hey look, a rock"






  

2011-03-26 [Artsieladie]: I have a "ripe gripe". *opens up the bag and allows the stinky, rotten juice to pour out all over Mort's shoe*


Just whom was it that fed Gizmo after midnight? I thought it to be pretty common no-ledge that she is NOT to be fed after the clock strikes midnight. Someone here fed her alphabet soup and it wasn't any ordinary alphabet soup, either. This particular soup contained html and all sorts of codes, etc.. Then the wine that was served to her to go with, was kiwi wine, green kiwi wine.


As a result, she brought forth into this land a gremlin of all gremlins that likes to make his home where he can find lots of the same of that which his Mogwai mother was fed. After much contemplation to be sure he was named correctly, this gremlin's name is Gredda (Gredda_Gremlin).


Be on the lookout for him! He's extremely clever and conniving and will do most anything to satisfy his insatiable lust for more of that "alpa-html-betical soup and a kiwi wine chaser. Since Gizmo was initially served this very same here, Gredda may be looking for more right here at Bob's Diner.


Currently, in the lab the mad scientists are working around the clock trying to find a way to reverse this process, counteract this defective mutant, but as of yet, have had no success. Meanwhile, Gredda remains at large, feasting on all the html he can find! Beware!


Also, photos are being developed as I speak in the photo lab. The results will be posted soon. He must be captured and brought immediately to the heavily guarded quarantine unit, where a series of experiments both tried and untried, can then be performed on this unsavory creature!


About the reward... A few ideas have come in, in this regard, but we're accepting suggestions and ideas that will be the most attention grabbing to enable the capture of this beast. At present the description is a gremlin with 'some' human (not humane) characteristics and likely contributing to the idea rumored that he 'may' be part human, which would also explain his ultra cleverly devious side.


To this time, he has been able to out-smart, therefore elude any and all attempts to entrap him. There have been reports of several close calls, but close doesn't count obviously. Perhaps, if Gredda is captured here at Bob's Diner, there might be an arrangement that can be made in regards to the various remnants of Gredda's remains, morsels, that could be served here as a very pricey, rare and erotic, I mean, exotic, delicacy? ...ummm.. once he has been thoroughly examined, then dissected, that is. I'll try to negotiate this possibility with the mad scientists. Chow!
2011-03-26 Chuck Norris: How can you capture an animal that I've... already... eaten...?
2011-03-26 [Artsieladie]: Hey Chuck! How the hell are you? Oh perhaps you 'thought' you did? You see, Gredda is very adept at "appearing to be" something or 'some'one other than himself.
2011-03-26 Chuck Norris: It's too early in the morning to question Chuck Norris. You're too young to die. Both of these sentences have common similarities.
2011-03-26 [Pillowthief]: I love connect the dot games!
2011-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: A humanoid gremlin, huh? *points at Misty*


You don't mean that thing, do you?
2011-03-26 [Duke Devlin]: LOL Y'all think you are /b/ros. :)
2011-03-27 [Jenny Crank]: Humanoid Gremlins..shit it really is going down like 4 flat tires..
2011-03-27 Chuck Norris: *roundhouse kicks Jenny Cranks face* And who did you expect when you got four flat tires AT THE SAME EXACT TIME?
2011-03-27 [Jenny Crank]: *is in orbit* DAMN THAT CHUCK NORRIS!
2011-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: We /co/mrades are clearly the superior breed... RRRAAAAAHHH!! *flexes muscles*... *shirt rips*...


Dang it. That was my only shirt... *stirs the soup naked, since I apparently didn't have any pants on anyway*...
2011-03-27 [Nekko fox]: You know, God Moding random gremlins is comparable to tea-bagging a bear trap. Everyone around just winces, then laughs because it was stupid. And Mort, you left your clothes in the oven again. I took them out and set them on the stove to dry. I think they're burning, so you might want to check 'em.
2011-03-27 [Duke Devlin]: *throws pants Mort's way* You wouldn't wanna burn yourself! ;)
2011-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks them*


Yes, they do appear to be burning. Thank you. *returns to the soup*... *stirs in the pants*...
2011-03-28 [Pillowthief]: Oi! Those were MY pants!
2011-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh well. There's nothing I can do... *the pants float back to the top of the soup, miraculously completely dry*...


NOTHING. I. CAN. DO. *violently jabs the pants back down to the bottom*
2011-03-28 [Nekko fox]: *The pants, dejected, sob and sink to the bottom of the pot and proceed to burn*
2011-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: At least we can all take solace in the fact that we tried everything we could to save the pants. They will be missed... *the pants, having regained its composure, stops burning and returns once more to the top of the soup in a futile attempt to escape*


EVERYTHING. WE. COULD. *harpoons the screaming pants back down to the bottom*
2011-03-28 [Duke Devlin]: It's a sad day indeed. *holds funeral service for the pants*
2011-03-28 [midnight toker]: did i win...?
2011-03-28 [Mortified Penguin]: No, but you do get a consolation prize. Grendel! Violent sodomy at table seven! *the monster groans and lumbers toward [midnight toker]*
2011-03-29 [Jewl]: O.O Violent sodomy? That's the first prize, not just consolation!
2011-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Violent sodomy is every prize, but first prize is a little more brutal.
2011-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts playing some sheet music on the organ in the bathroom*


  

2011-03-29 [kians mummy]:   
2011-03-29 [kians mummy]:   
2011-03-29 [kians mummy]:   
2011-03-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, that points at my sheet music! *slaps Duke with a sequin studded glove*
2011-03-30 God: Hey, that points ambiguously in a direction that is generally considered to me mine! *slaps Duke with a rock studded glove*
2011-03-30 [Nekko fox]: Everyone shut up, obviously the picture is supposed to be inverted for esoteric reasons no longer considered valid in todays day and age!


*slaps duke with a God-studded Mort*
2011-03-30 [Mortified Penguin]: God-stud? He sure is! Just look at that handsome, chiseled face.



2011-03-30 [kians mummy]:   


pig one: "kiss my butt"


pig two: "no, you kiss my butt
2011-03-30 [Nekko fox]:    don't mind us, just changing a bulb.
2011-04-01 [Paul Doyle]: "Jesus---The Revenge" http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VFx7WFVP1FI
2011-04-01 [kians mummy]:  itssssss niceeee
2011-04-01 God: *Uses his god like powers to not make the image work*
2011-04-01 [kians mummy]: but it doesn't work
2011-04-01 God: Worked for a couple millennia, don't know what's wrong now...
2011-04-02 God: Nope, working again.
2011-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: God, what OS do you use anyway? Is it Mort's Special Happy Quick Fun Time Operating System? Because I could use a good endorsement. Since it killed all those kids, fewer people have been purchasing it... stupid kids... it clearly says on the label that loading software may cause explosions.
2011-04-02 [Sheamus Finn]: *Raises hand* You mean that disk I put inside the terminator? Whoops.....
2011-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: HE'S NOT A TERMINATOR, HE'S AN OPERATING SYSTEM. *pats the OS on his shoulder gun* It's okay, MSHQFTOS. He didn't mean it... *MSHQFTOS whirs gently and terminates some passing customers*
2011-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Th-they were viruses... it was self-defense.
2011-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses the corpses in the Purge Oven*
2011-04-02 [kians mummy]: its not working lol
2011-04-02 God: Right now, it's still at a 50-50 chance of working. I say it's a spawn of Satano (Satan's lazy Mexican cousin, kinda like the Quetzalcoatl) and should be set on fir- Hey! *Points dramatically at several cooks who have already finished roasting the demon-gif over an oven-flame grill*
SALT THAT LIKE SADAM!
2011-04-02 God: It tastes better that way.
2011-04-02 [Fruit Loops]: anyone need to work off some extra weight ?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oRUWu4BQj0I
2011-04-02 God: *rains sulfur on [@173503]*
2011-04-03 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Pahaha Piggie Porn :P
2011-04-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-04-03 God: Quiet Jigglypuff. I still think it was wrong to create you. I never loved you. At least the platypus was created to make me laugh- you, I was just drunk. And reeealy high.
2011-04-04 [Nekko fox]: "The fuck you say God?!"


  

2011-04-04 God: That's my brother! How'd you get my brother, demonspawn?!?
2011-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Airplane with a giant net attached to it?
2011-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: That's how I caught my deity. *points at Ganesh, flopping around in a net*
2011-04-04 [Nekko fox]: *walks in and steps on Jigglypuff* Eww, who left gun-flavored marshmallows on the floor?
2011-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Wasn't me. I did leave the marshmallow-flavored guns all over the place though. *picks one up and fires randomly into the long line in front of the register*


CAN'T YOU READ?! I'M ON BREAK UNTIL FI- *checks watch* Oh, wait. My break ended ten minutes ago. *gets back behind the register*
2011-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Wait, Mort...working?


*Bursts into flames. This is too much to take in*
2011-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That's what she said! She didn't burst into flames though... in fact, sh-


"YOU SHOT MY SON! HE'S DEAD!"


That really sounds like a personal problem, sir. Now order something or get out of line.


"Sorry, I'll have a cheeseburger and some fr-"


TOO LATE. I'M ON BREAK AGAIN. *opens fire on more customers*
2011-04-05 [Pillowthief]: *walks in and steps on God's brother* Oh great! Now I've got lesser deity on my shoes! Will this day never end?!?
2011-04-05 [kians mummy]: sammie h for crew please come and support me
2011-04-05 [Pillowthief]: *walks out, but not before stepping on sammie h* Great! Just great! Now I have lesser deity AND wannabe crew on my shoes! *walks off in a huff*
2011-04-05 [kians mummy]: "hay, she walked out with my pillow, you thief"
2011-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Screw the crew! *Sets fire to people's napkins*
2011-04-05 [Thunder Cid]: Yeah screw those lot of impudent upstarts...oh wait O.o
2011-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't spell screw without crew! Unless you misspell it...
2011-04-05 [Thunder Cid]: SKREW!
2011-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: It's never safe to shout that here. Especially not during one of our tri-weekly rapist conventions... *the rapists look up from their coffee*...
2011-04-05 [Thunder Cid]: I said it. I can't unsay it.
2011-04-05 [Mortified Penguin]: You're not trying hard enough. It's quite possible to unsay things. Like earlier, I mentioned that your mother was a harlot and we got into a fight. However, I unsaid it and here we are.
2011-04-06 [Pillowthief]: *the harlots look up from their coffee, briefly meeting eyes with the rapists. They eye each other almost greedily, before realizing that doing anything about it would most probably end up resulting in irony or something to do with an oxymoron. They return to their coffee*
2011-04-06 [Nekko fox]: *the coffee is nothing but swill and people start noticing they are surrounded by harlots and rapists. The children start glancing around nervously from their icecream and razorblade sundaes, spitting out broken teeth and the occasional gout of blood. Parents start tucking away wallets, while truckers get drunk on cheap booze. None of this happens at B's D, and all of these events are unrelated*
2011-04-06 [kians mummy]: It's quite possibly to unsay things. it don't make sense
2011-04-06 God: Your FACE doesnt make sense. That reminds me... stupid Jigglypuff.
2011-04-06 [Sheamus Finn]: *throws Jigglypuff against the wall* Wonder how long he'll stick up there?
2011-04-06 [Thunder Cid]: *duct tapes jigglypuff* Forever.
2011-04-06 [Aliz]: *pokes Jigglypuff with a stick* =/
2011-04-06 [Pillowthief]: *sets Jigglypuff on fire* *inhales sweet stench of burning marshmallow flesh* *inhales fresh marshmallow screams of pain*
2011-04-06 [Araglas]: I just cleamed in here!! And by just I mean about 300 years ago....but still...its a mess!!
2011-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: HYAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!! *suplexes a table*


It was coming right at you, Araglas. I saved your life. You owe me.
2011-04-07 [Jewl]: *globs of burned/melted Jigglypuff starts falling from the wall* Reminds me of college.
2011-04-07 God: Reminds me of sammie h's face. *erases sammie h's face from existence* There. Now it doesn't.
2011-04-07 [Nekko fox]: *Sets parts of Sammie H on fire, which then pass on to Sheamus Finn, which only adds to the conflagration of molten Jigglypuff meat*


why did I do this again. Oh, nevermind...


*Goes to the refrigerator and pulls out a bowl with saran-wrap on the top, a sticky note on the side saying "Mort's Ramen: Eat and you Shall Perish" on the side, with a drawing of a penis ejaculating ruination on everything. He sets it aside and drags the refrigerator full of food out to the street and lays it in the middle of afternoon traffic, riveting it down into the cement to prevent it from being moved. He then sets up a sign with an arrow pointing in some random direction saying "Come eat at Bob's Diner, you sure as hell aren't going anywhere anytime soon!" He ignores the honking and swearing of the drivers and goes back inside, accidentally kicking over the bowl of ramen which promptly begins eating its way through the floor boards*
2011-04-07 [kians mummy]: all of a sudden my hand comes back to life and picks up a canister of acid and poors it all over you so it burns all your skin off
2011-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: My sulfuric ramen!! *removes a chainsaw from the weapon rack and violently removes Jewl's elbows*... *ejaculates ruination on everything*...


Sergeyevich! Go down to the Ramen Shack and get me 20 more bowls of the spicy stuff. *hands Sergeyevich a dollar* That should cover it.


"I do not understand. What is ramen?"


Yeah, the spicy ones. Twenty. *props legs up on the cash register and starts reading some porno*... *Sergeyevich runs away with the dollar*...
2011-04-07 [Nekko fox]: *Walks around without skin, not having noticed it sloughing off due to the acid*


Hey, is it breezy in here?


*shuts the holes in the roof*
2011-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY. Now how are the owls supposed to get out?! *owls angrily attack sammie h*


*a police officer comes in, inquiring about the refrigerator labeled "PROPERTY OF BOB'S DINER" that's stuck in the middle of the road*... *words are exchanged*... *a gun fight ensues*... *gets bored and goes back to reading porno at the register*... huh... she has a mole on her butt here, but on page 92, she doesn't... *makes note of this*... and here on page 112, she's wearing a th- *gets hit with a barrage of bullets*
2011-04-07 [Nekko fox]: *Takes the barrage of bullets outside* Piss off, we don't serve your kind here!


*the barrage walks off, grumbling and saying that they'll be back with their buddies Storm of bullets and Wall of Lead. They make sure to kick Sammie H's drink over as they leave*
2011-04-07 [Pillowthief]: Is still wondering what happened to Sammie h's hand, and why it needed to grow back... *browses back through comments* Have you been missing it for a while? Why dont you have a face? WHAT KIND OF PLACE IS THIS?!? *Jumps on top of a giant pipe thats sticking out of the floor*


How convenient! BEEDOBEedobedoo! *Disappears down pipe* *Collects coins*
2011-04-07 [Aliz]: *pokes register instead of Jigglypuff* =/
2011-04-07 [Thunder Cid]: U mad God?  
2011-04-07 [Araglas]: *drops a bomb down the pipe pillowthief left in and walks away strapping more bombs to thunder cid casting blame on him*
2011-04-07 [Thunder Cid]: *ponders* I'm strapped with bombs this line is too damn long and I gotta be at work in 5 minutes. Cutsiess!
2011-04-07 [Flisky]:   


Troll! In the Dungeon! Troll!


Just thought you should know!
2011-04-07 [Araglas]:
SILENCE




Teachers will come with me to the dungeons, prefects shall take their respective students to their common rooms.
2011-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: MY COINS!! Curse you, tiny Italian man! You've robbed me for the last time! *takes some mushrooms* HA HAA!! Now I'm super powerful and gigantic! Take this!! *shoots fireballs from his mouth*


*In reality, Mort is actually on the floor, thrashing about and foaming at the mouth. It would seem that Jose has, yet again, sold him a bad batch.*
2011-04-08 [Pillowthief]: *Pokes Mort in his wiki-face* *browses Elftown*
2011-04-08 [Pillowthief]: *finds the link he wants* *twists ear and pastes (with glue) the link he was looking for*
http://youtu.be/JpBGRA6HHtY
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's face gives an internal server error*
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's face crashes and reboots*


Mort's Face was improperly shut down. Please select an option:


Safe Mode
Safe Mode with Networking
Safe Mode with Command Prompt
Unsafe Mode with Cobras

Enable Boot Logging
Enable Shoe Logging
Enable Rainforest Logging
Debugging Mode
Delousing Mode

Start Mort's Face Normally
Reboot
Put It In
Return to Menu
2011-04-08 [Sheamus Finn]: Is it too late to get the cobras?
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes. The time already ran out. Luckily though, cobras are the default option.


*cobras start slithering out of Mort's disk drive*
2011-04-08 [Sheamus Finn]: *picks them up and puts them in the coffee pot* Special house brew!
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's hand grows back*... *smacks the coffee pot out of Famous Shin's hand*... You fool! That's no coffee pot! It's a badger! *steps over the broken glass and casually strolls into the ladies room with a camera*
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *loud screams and a slap is heard*... *moments later, a woman comes running out with a swollen cheek*...


Yeah, you better run! *shakes fist*
2011-04-08 God: What were you doing with my badger?!?
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Badger? What badger? *eats badger*
2011-04-08 [Sheamus Finn]: Good thing it wasn't a beaver.
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Beaver? What beaver? *eats screaming orphan child*
2011-04-08 [Sheamus Finn]: This one...
2011-04-08 [Sheamus Finn]:    Over there....
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe that is a muskrat, sir. You can tell by the dorsal fin and the lust for human brains in its eyes. To avoid being attacked, I suggest a complete lobotomy... I'll fetch the hatchet. *steps back into the ladies room*
2011-04-08 [Sheamus Finn]: *Pulls a gun and shoots the beaver* No worries.
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: You can never be too sure though. *takes the hatchet to Pillowthief's ankles... just in case*
2011-04-08 [Pillowthief]: My ankles are down there, sir. *glances down at sammie h*
2011-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: So they are! *proceeds to hatchet (that's right, I'm using it as a verb!) Misty's corpse*
2011-04-08 [Ninja Smurf]: I take it I did not miss anything important here. *slaps Mort with a live tuna*
2011-04-08 [Araglas]: *runs around bursting into random flames*
2011-04-08 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-04-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: omi biggins.
Thats ahooooge flame
2011-04-09 God: Eh. I've seen bigger.
2011-04-09 [Pillowthief]: Goddammit (Pun intended)! Stop watching me shower! Take your "omni-presence" thingy elsewhere!
2011-04-09 [Araglas]: But he likes watching you shower! I have the proof at godlikeswatchingpillowthiefshower.org I mean the pictures are goo waaay back
2011-04-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Superman and the armpit of darkness


''Come, take a deep breath. Gaze into my armpit and I will take you into a whole new realm my love.''


The tall, amazonian woman swooned, and superman caught her. ''Yes, my stench is rather fetching. I can tell you are rather taken about by my sweaty aroma''


The hairs nestled in each of the follicles hungrily greeted the woman, and she was swallowed by darkness..
2011-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: That's just SICK, God! *slams binoculars down on the tree branch in disgust*


*notices Superman absorbing Amazonian women into his armpits*... That can't be good for business... then again, I guess the Bear Trap Salad isn't either... *goes back to watching Pillowthief shower*
2011-04-10 [Araglas]: *watches superman for a moment before going back to seeling pictures of pillowthief showering to random customers*
2011-04-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh, hey! That is a nice looking armpi- OHMYGODIT'SABSORBINGMEWHYWON'TANYBODYHELPDAMNYOUALLESPECIALLYYOUARAGLAS,IBLAMEMYDEATHENTIRELYONYOU!!
2011-04-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *climbs out of the other armpit*... whoa... where was I just now? Hey, wait... do you have a license to seel those pictures?! *pulls out a harpoon and fires it into traffic*
2011-04-10 [Araglas]: *is momentarily taken aback by sagacious Turkey's death and revival, but pulls out a small card* Yup, I wouldn't be selling these pictures if I didn't. *the card has a picture of a Penguine eating ramen on it and some legal mojo stuff around it*
2011-04-10 Officer Hooker: Can I see you other seeling license please?
2011-04-10 [Pillowthief]: *clubs a baby seal* What? You need a license for that?
2011-04-10 [Flisky]: *clubs a baby Pillowthief* Crap! The Hooker Cops!
2011-04-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Bunny hops * Leaves a steaming little present by the door. No, really, I should have.
2011-04-10 [Araglas]: *grumbles and pulls a seels head out his his pocket and opens it mouth and pulls out a few documents showing his liscense for seeling* There...anything else?
2011-04-10 [Pillowthief]: *goes clubbing* Mini Me! Nooooooo...... *makes clubbing noises with his mouth* *lasers and pretty lights flash*
2011-04-11 [Fruit Loops]: A herm im looking for a good seel skin, i heard the ribs were for her pleasure ?
2011-04-11 Officer Hooker: I'll need your license as well.
2011-04-11 Officer Hooker: *clubs Fruit Loops in the ribs* Huh. That was unexpectedly pleasing.
2011-04-11 A Herm: *looks up from doing herm stuff*


Seel skin? I a'int got no seel skin. *goes back to doing herm stuff*
2011-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts dancing to club music* Wait... lasers and pretty flashing lights...?


Ah, crap. The stove is sparking up again. *grabs the fire extinguisher*
2011-04-11 [Nekko fox]: *starts stealing cereal from the pantry while everyone is preoccupied and makes a killing on the black market. With guns. Selling them that is. To dead people. That Mort killed*
2011-04-11 GLaDOS: Please assume the correct party submission position.
2011-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Cake first! Then party!
2011-04-11 [Nekko fox]: NO. NO CAKE. EVER. PIE. ALWAYS. PIE GOOD.
2011-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *comically throws a pie at Nekko's face*... *many deaths and injuries occur from the serious misuse of a pie tin*... *is hauled away to a maximum security prison, to await execution*...
2011-04-12 GLaDOS: The cake is not a lie. Where are you GGGgooiNg? BBBrghBBB. Come BBBrgBack. All you friends are waiting. This cake is delicious. Where are you?
2011-04-12 GLaDOS: Hello? Where are you? BBBBrghBBBBbbbbb......
2011-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait, wait... so the cake isn't a lie? That mustachioed walrus over there *points at Misty* told me it was.
2011-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.iamhelenkeller.com/
2011-04-12 [Pillowthief]: Crap. I suck at being a blind person. Average Life Expectancy: 5.1 Secs.
2011-04-12 [kians mummy]: dead
2011-04-12 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Sammie H croaked like Frogger on the interstate.


*Uses the corpse to beat away angry customers who bum-rushed the cash register to get their refunds. Apparently none of them ordered broken glass in their mashed potatoes*


What did you people expect? This ain't no fancy restaurant!
2011-04-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: it isn't. Wtf? I was expecting quail dinosaur eggs and venison vicars and octopus hair for lunch.
2011-04-12 [Nekko fox]: *Throws the remains of Sammie H into a pot and drops the pot on Infinity's table. He pours salt on the body and throws menus at people who just walked in*


Pretend it's soup.


*He knocks over the pot, spilling body and salt all over Infinity. He ignores it and goes back to dropping scraps into the hole in the floor, taking bets from the crowd to see which zombie in the basement will get what scrap*
2011-04-12 [Nekko fox]: *starts dropping in the children that belonged to the new families to see how well the kids faired against hordes of hungry undead without weapons. Betting gets heated*
2011-04-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Opens her mouth wide and a trail of fire emblazes forth* My, its cavernous inside there..
2011-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes spelunking in [9jlriexqk,ktpk]'s mouth*... *repels down the trachea*... *takes a pickax to the lung*... Where's the gold?!
2011-04-14 [Nekko fox]: *Calls down after Mort*


Check in the colon.
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: Looks like Mort isnt the first to go spelunking into that cavern...
2011-04-14 [kians mummy]: *i know where i am not wanted*


bye
2011-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't leave yet! You have to slow roast for at least 45 more minutes! We at Bob's Diner would never serve a customer an undercooked meal... Overcooked? Yes. Expired? Yes. Alive? Yes. Undercooked? Yes. Poisoned? Yes. But never, NEVER would we serve something undercooked. NEVER. *throws raw meat at Nekko* Deliver that steak to table seven.
2011-04-14 [kians mummy]: Undercooked? Yes, you just put you would
2011-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: No I didn't. I'm pretty sure you're wrong.
2011-04-14 [kians mummy]: take a look
2011-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: That was clearly photoshopped in.
2011-04-14 [kians mummy]: You can't leave yet! You have to slow roast for at least 45 more minutes! We at Bob's Diner would never serve a customer an undercooked meal... Overcooked? Yes. Expired? Yes. Alive? Yes. Undercooked? Yes. Poisoned? Yes. But never, NEVER would we serve something undercooked. NEVER. *throws raw meat at Nekko* Deliver that steak to table seven.
2011-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yep. Photoshop. I can tell from some of the pixels and from seeing quite a number of shops in my time.
2011-04-14 [kians mummy]: lol
2011-04-14 [Mortified Penguin]: No, YOU'RE an lol.


*takes a customer hostage* BACK UP. I'LL WASTE THIS OLD MAN. DON'T TEST ME.
2011-04-14 [Delladreing]: *pst* Mort...that's no man, man.
2011-04-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You would never serve a customer undercooked? I should hope not
2011-04-14 [Flisky]: Nope. You gotta cook the customers quite thoroughly.
2011-04-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: How do you cook chav's? Do you suppose that they need curing or something?
2011-04-14 [kians mummy]: they are the extra taste
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: Do you want to know the secret ingredient to our Secret Ingredient Soup?


You. Its just you. *hog ties Sammy H, Infinity Hypothosis, Flisky (who, in anticipation, took hog-tying escape lessons and makes a break for it), and Deladreing*


There. That should be enough for the week- Wait, are we missing one? 
2011-04-14 [Delladreing]: As an experienced witch I would like to point out that not only am I skilled at untying knots, but underwater as well. Soup should prove an interesting challenge though.
2011-04-14 [Nekko fox]: IT'S A WITCH!


*Drops Deladreing into acid, melting them down so as to be consumed later so that they may gain the witch-powers fermenting within*


Also, those soup ingredients are obviously undercooked.


*Tosses out Sammie H and Flisky, charbroils Hypothesis, expectorates on the old man that isn't a man, man, and falls asleep on one of the customer's tables*
2011-04-14 [Nekko fox]: Also, no one likes to listen to people brag about a young religion with no reasonable applications. Just talk to that guy over there.


*Points at a man wearing robes and walking on water, turning it into wine as he goes, trying so very hard to get people's attention by healing the infirm and making the blind see. People are trying their damndest to ignore this OBVIOUS huckster and he is soon ushered out by security who promptly beats him viciously with week-old bread in the parking lot*


You see, no reasonable applications. Though I did hear he could fly when it rained.
2011-04-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Breaks wind at the excitement*
2011-04-14 [Flisky]: If we're getting cooked, can you at least do it right. I want to be baked. Hahaha.
2011-04-14 [Nekko fox]: *Smacks Flisk for making such a joke in such poor taste then simply burns them all alive*
2011-04-14 [Flisky]: *is burned alive then rises again from the ashes*
2011-04-14 [Nekko fox]: Damned pheonix...


*Drowns Flisky instead*
2011-04-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Roars tips head back and hoovers the lot of you up and lets out an almighty belch*
2011-04-14 [Flisky]: *is drowned, comes back as a wight*
2011-04-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: whats one of those
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: *Calls Ghost Busters* *Two men show up and start bathing Flisky with lasers* Remember- this time, dont cross the streams!
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: *points out that objective questions asked on the internet, the most powerful knowledge library ever created, are dumb*
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: *points out that your face is dumb*
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: *points out that pandas are going extinct because you're dumb.
2011-04-14 [Flisky]: *looks at the lasers and shakes her head* No, no. You're doing it all wrong. I am NOT a ghost. I'm undead. *mutters to self* Idiots.
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]: *points out that this one time you went to McDonalds and got some frenchfries and ketchup packets, and you sat down to eat them but you couldn't get 'em open so you went to the store to buy some scissors but didn't have enough money so you started running to your friends house to borrow some money so you could buy some scissors to open up your ketchup packets and enjoy your frenchfries more fully but then just before you got to his front door a piano fell on your head.


Because you're dumb.
2011-04-14 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: You're dumb because smiley face.
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in carrying a flask of Ol' Jeb's Fine Moonshine*... Did someone say zombies?!?!?! *throws zombie crackers everywhere*...
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *smacks the flask out of your hand* NO. NOBODY SAID 'ZOMBIES' YOU DRUNK MOTH- oh, wait. People did say zombies. Clearly I'm the drunk one. I need to go home and rest... *drives onto the freeway*... *takes out a school bus*...
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Did someone say school bus?!?! *throws potato grenades at little shaved ice babies*...
2011-04-15 [Nekko fox]: *Starts handing out undercooked food*
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: You should have thrown them at those unshaved ice babies instead. Hairy jerks.
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: :o
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't you look at me in that tone of voice. DON'T DO IT. *grabs some undercooked food*... *assaults a family of four with it*...
2011-04-15 [Nekko fox]: But the unshaved, hairy babies are reserved for Mort's ramen special.
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: It's a reference to this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBDbsG8C_qA
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: No, YOU'RE reserved for Mort's ramen special! *attempts to push you into a boiling pot, but accidentally pushes some nuns in*
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *assimilates*
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: SHH! Did you hear that? *a slight rustle comes from a potato bag* They're becoming sapient again... *grabs a potato peeler off the weapon rack*
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Or this...
http://www.mondominishows.com/index.php?IdEpisode=677&episodesPage=0&series=28
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ah see, ah see... *smokes pipe*
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: ALSO, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A2m2x8qJcGQ&feature=player_embedded#at=44
2011-04-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Get out of my Hobbit hole!
2011-04-15 [Nekko fox]: *Starts stabbing bags of potatoes. Not because they are sentient, but because he just fucking hates potatoes*
2011-04-15 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-04-15 [Nekko fox]: And bags. Hate them too.
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: But what about sacks?! You can't possibly hate sacks!
2011-04-15 [Pillowthief]: What will I carry my potatoes in now?!
2011-04-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Lucky for you, Bob's Not-A-Scam Industrial Corporation Thing has just released the new Potato Box©.


"It's a box. I carry potatoes and stuff in it." - Larry (Not An Actor) Actington.


"It makes carrying potatoes easy!" - Joe the Potato Farmer


"Please, don't shoot me! OH GOD, NO! NNNOOO-" - vagrant who kept offering to wash my car


As you can clearly see from these paid testimonials, people love our new Potato Box©!


WARNING: Prolonged use of Potato Box© may result in hysterical pregnancies, debilitating colon warts, damaged potatoes, and/or violent rape. Don't use if you have a heart condition, are pregnant, or generally value your life.
2011-04-15 [Pillowthief]: Hurray!
2011-04-16 [Sheamus Finn]: *lights potato box on fire* Viking potato funeral...
*lights random patron on fire*
2011-04-16 [Araglas]: *is selling potato boxes to customers*
2011-04-16 [Mortified Penguin]: [Viking] isn't a potato. He's clearly a squash.
2011-04-16 [Pillowthief]: Looks more like a melon to me...
2011-04-16 [Fruit Loops]: afixes a mast and sail to the potatoe box, for a proper funeral :)
2011-04-16 [Pillowthief]: *Pirates ahoy! Your Potato Box was attacked by Captain Steve and his band of vicious pirates. They made off with your booty and supplies!* *You lose 576exp and your flagship Russet Wind!*


*Your popularity in the majority polls slips!* *You lose the Female Vote, the Black Vote, and the J00s Vote! Ratings fall!*


*You:*
Try to pull your Coup back together and build another Potato Box- Turn to page #143
Shoot the J00s- Turn to page #72
Shout obscenities at the pirates- Turn to page #72
Go back to trying to convince [Viking] he's actually a melon- Turn to page #118
Shout obscenities at [Viking]- Turn to page #72
Pretend your Viking Potato Box Funeral went as planned- Turn to page #370
Go back to work at Bob's Diner!- Turn to page #1
2011-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *rips out all the pages but #1*


To the kitchen with you! Don't make me get the hatchet again, you piece of sh- *the human resources guy bursts in*


Aw, crap. Th-this isn't what it looks like.


"It's not? Works for me!" *HR guy leaves*... *continues threatening workers with a hatchet*...
2011-04-17 [Pillowthief]: Crap. Now what am I supposed to carry my potatoes in?! AND HOW DID YOU RIP OUT PAGE #2?!?
2011-04-17 [Pillowthief]:
  
HOW?!?


WHERE'D IT GO? THE DOLPHIN'S SUBPLOT WAS ON THAT PAGE!
2011-04-19 Doug Flutie: Eee ee ee eee ee!
2011-04-19 [Pillowthief]: Quiet Doug! You didn't play for the Dolphins!
2011-04-19 [kians mummy]:
boo
boo
boo
boo
boo
boo
boo
boo
2011-04-19 [Thunder Cid]: Fail boo is fail :P
2011-04-19 [Nekko fox]: Yeah it was. We all know we cleaned out all the ghosts last week from the storage closet and attic. All the ghosts have been humanely relocated to Mort's ramen bowl.
2011-04-20 [Pillowthief]: Boo Berry flavored ramen? How is that being 'humane'?
2011-04-20 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! I told you to clean the GOATS out from the storage closet and attic, not the ghosts... *goats chew on my prized collection of cans*... damn you, goats!
2011-04-20 [Araglas]: *walks in carrying giant boxes of Scooby Snacks* Who in the hell ordered Scooby snacks? There is a whole truck load!
2011-04-20 [Pillowthief]: Actually... those are quite tasty.


Quickly! Send them back before the customers discover them!
2011-04-21 [Araglas]: *is stampeeded by hungry and starving customers* OH GOD! HELP ME!! *ripping and tearing can be heard* AAAHH!!! GOD THEY ARE BITING ME!! HEEELP!!!
2011-04-21 [Pillowthief]: See? Right there. Thats why I do not carry chesseburgers around in my pockets. It can only lead to pain and heartbreak.
2011-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: And a build up of pocket grease, which can be dangerous. That's what I suspect killed Jimmy, the guy that used to deliver seagulls... *points at a corpse in the corner with a harpoon sticking out of the chest*...
2011-04-21 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, but its probably best that we dont receive seagulls anymore anyways. Remember Paul? *points at another corpse in the corner covered with staples and other office memorabilia, like sponges*
2011-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: At least they died doing what they loved... running in terror. We should all be so lucky.
2011-04-21 [Pillowthief]: The big bouncer at the door keeps telling me not to run- I'd only die tired. He's scary.
2011-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I don't remember hiring him. He just kind of showed up there one day and demanded a paycheck. I tried to argue with him, but he brought up some very fine points... which he used to stab me repeatedly with... *watches as he choke slams a food critic*... I'm guessing he's part of the reason we get such bad reviews... that and the terrible food. And maybe all these corpses.
2011-04-21 [Nekko fox]: Hey, I hear you are paying Reginald now. I didn't know we needed a bouncer.


*starts eating cereal out of the chest cavity of the dead food critic*
2011-04-21 [Nekko fox]: Dobby relished his groinsaw's roar as he withdrew the flesh-choked blade from the astronaut's ruined skull. He turned to Harry, thrusting his bloody, retina-covered pelvis with elfin fervor.


"How does Ronnie Ron taste, master?"


Harry spat out an eyeball. "Like some kid with eyes."


Dobby ducked an astronaut's poison barbed fist, digging his groinsaw into the beast's abdomen and letting the spray of viscera wash over his elfin space armor. The skulls' eye sockets on his shoulders grew brilliant with an infernal cast and vomited a bolt of light through an astronaut; he was thrown back against the deathwall, his flesh boiling in another dimension.


Harry slapped Dobby, who giggled.


Harry reminded himself to kill himself later.


"Master, look out!"


Dobby's groinsaw screamed as it flew off the armor, rocketing through the air like an early dream of mankind. It flew through three astronauts who dropped their hellspears as the saw cut a hole in the ground beneath them so they fell to hell and the demonic spheres rape them to this day, boys and girls.


"Now, Dobby."


Dobby knelt before his master.


Harry withdrew his guitar, Fuckslayer, from a dimension where all screamed for naught.


Wrought from the silver heart of heaven's false promise, laced with vessels that pulsed with angel's menstrual blood, hewn from the horns of Satan's generals, it laughed as it was set loose, a laugh that only Harry could hear, but no one could share.


Harry swung the guitar through Dobby's chicken neck. He took the head of his fallen dwarfslave and tore open his stomach, stuffing the head inside. Harry vomited steam and summoned a great meteor from space to smash into Hogwarts and kill everyone there, for no reason at all. A vision then appeared. It was Dumbledore, entombed in his cursed mummy armor, calling Harry from his Moonbase which wasn't on a moon.


"Harry, you must rock the fuck out."


Harry channeled his rage through Fuckslayer. The angel blood boiled as he summoned the great meteor, swathed with the blood of the tiny fucklings at Hogwarts, leapt onto it, and flew into space. He encased the entire meteor in a wreath of holy fuckfire and flew through Mercury, killing the fuck out of it. Then he sent Mercury's carcass into Venus, killing the fuck out of it and making every vagina in the galaxy explode, and inside every vagina a booby sang of mortal life's fleeting precipice.


Harry then did fly his meteor through space, punching astral vampires in half with his fists encased in fuckfire and throwing their ruined heads into the past where they bit cavemen on mars so that history changed and now there are vampire cavemen on mars. Harry received another vision from Frumblegore, who was having tea and chumpits with the president of Pangea.


"Care to have tea, Harry?"


"You know how I hate chumpits."


Harry slammed his book shut. It wasn't really a book, because the pages were made of lasers and the words were made of headless women making godless love to dragons made out of motorcycles, but it was still reading.


"Gumbledorp, if you don't stop, we'll starve, and no one will be around to kill everyone in the universe if we get around to bringing everyone back to life after we killed them."


"I am no longer Scrumblegort."


The ancient man dropped some of the planets he was juggling.


"The worlds have shifted. I am Dumblecop, of the Darkmeal."


He flexed one of his legs, which was made of pistols, and kicked a planet in half.


"Bugger your Darkmeal, faggart of a thousand suns."


Dumblecop sniffed.


"And what of it? Is it a sin, should a man feel like faggarting a sun or a thousand? Why should the suns heave through the void, if not to be skewer't bypon ourn fagpoles?"


Harry cast a glance at the book. Unsavory sounds emanated from a particularly damned chapter. He was hungry. He looked at a nearby cup. It had a faded brown film on the bottom. He thought about chumpits.


Harry had found some food. It was guarded by three and a million thousandsurf ninjas, for it was the last food on Surf Ninja Moon X. The ecology had been decimated by surf ninjas, so the last food was a cabbage and mustard sandwich. Harry squatted in the ruins of a castle which had been many skulls arranged to resemble one large one. It had been poorly done, with the cheeks fading into an amateurishly executed jaw line. The silent killers of the night had negated their innate advantage by only plying their craft on surf boards. During the day.


Harry was about to eat his cabbagewich when a man in a tuxedo appeared from behind nothing much. He stood ten feet tall and his head seemed wrapped in unwrappable darkness.


"I am Rape Radbury. I write critically acclaimed fiction that always turns into fact. That's why I have more money than anyone."


Harry dug a bit of cartilage out of the cabbagewich and continued chewing.


"Would you care to discuss one of my books? I hear that my..."


Harry fished out another bit of cartilage. It was a cartilage and mustard sandwich.


"You shouldn't believe what everyone says about me. I took a shower with my cousin, once. And I have racist thoughts."


A nibbet of yellow cartilage landed on Rape's shoe. He thought about his cousin.




The inquisitors were torturing Harry.


First, Ignatius used the rock.


Then Billy asked Harry if he wanted to read his BDSM blog. Harry was so surprised that his pants flew right off. He was wearing women's underpants.


The inquisitors were wearing them, too.


They realized that they were all men of the lord.


Harry awoke to the throaty grumble of a rape ape.


Not a rape ape, but the rape ape, the last of his kind after the subjugation of the rapeforest. His people once graced the canopy, their penile digits proudly grasping the vines as they swung through the night, their hundreds of sweaty simian dongs trailing a now-fetid memory in the rape ape's watering eye. As his ocular ducts began to well with ancestral pride, so too did the countless meaty members sprouting from the rape ape's every hairy inch. From his eye sockets, ear holes, even his calloused toes, a penile font of cry-juice birthed a deluge.


Harry observed this with consternation, as he was tied to a table. Neither magic nor supracosmic strength would free him from his bonds. Had this creature access to an unknown material of deistic strength? Or did the rape ape have a secret yet more baffling?


Harry squinted so he could see the subatomic strings of the ropes. He began tossing antimatter at them with his mind as a group of children entered the rape ape's hiding place. They were well-groomed and impeccably attired, and there were 5.8 of them, just enough to represent an array of genders and races that would leave no one unhappy, save for the Eskimos. They were on their own, as far as the rape ape was concerned.


"Why do you cry, rape ape?" asked child 3.2.


The rape ape, unwilling to hide its greasy primate cock tears, hung its head, and gravity coaxed the eye wangers downward. It tied them together into a bow atop its head, to be pretty for its guests.


"We are bound in this ligature of lingam, brother rape ape," said child 4.6.


The children surrounded rape ape, holding their hands, and began to sing. Harry was transfixed as he watched the children, gently swaying with the song, float skyward. The little ones began to orbit the rape ape, who was convulsing as though stricken by the seizure devil. As the song increased in tempo the childflesh bubbled and merged into a spinning wonder turbine. The fleshy kidmass sprouted hair and groin dribblers just like the rape ape, and sprayed confetti into skies of past and future, setting the constellations aflame with the opalescent of the perished rape apes. An explosion of color and hair left Harry Potter alone and still bound. He thought about sandwiches.
2011-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *gently strums a lute, while the story is told*
2011-04-21 [Nekko fox]: *cudgels Mort with his lute. He then stops and holds the crumpled, bloody scraps of would that remained of the instrument*


Oh, wait, no, please continue.


*Gives Mort the lute back*
2011-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *continues playing one continuous note, not just because there's only one string left after the violent cudgeling, but because I don't know how to play the lute*


Wait, wait... here comes the solo!


*plays that same note, but slightly faster*
2011-04-21 [Nekko fox]: OH SHIT! YOU SUMMONED A METEOR, WREATHED IN FUCKFIRE!


*The meteor is sitting by the counter, enjoying a bowl of soup. It looks up for a moment the goes back to its soup*
2011-04-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *A Grippo walks in, dressed in a beautiful pink negligee. Sits at the table opposite the counter and winks at the meteor. She's on the clock again, looking for a little atmosphere she's looking for some hotstuff, a hotf ck*
2011-04-21 [Nekko fox]: *Points at your syntax*


You misspelled fuck.
2011-04-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: That was deliberate oh omnipotent one. And you are a jiggle head. Look see how you jiggle so ;)
2011-04-21 [Pillowthief]: There's an edit button... You can still fix that.


Personally, I hate when I misspell fuck. There's just so many words it can turn into with just one careless letter, that mean nothing close to what you were probably saying.
2011-04-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Noodles people. Noodles.


The air has got to my brain and rendered me dumb from all that oxygen.


Mes apologies.
2011-04-21 [Pillowthief]: Are you eating Mort's noodles? *points at halfeaten bowl of Boo Berry flavored ramen*
2011-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't touch my ramen or *chops off his own arm* that'll happen to you... *tries to grab at a fork with his nub, but is unsucessful*... *absorbs ramen instead*...
2011-04-22 [Nekko fox]: And together, you are CAPTAIN PORNOGRAPHY!
2011-04-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Nom Nom*[Mortified Penguin] *absorbs[9jlriexqk,ktpk]*
2011-04-22 [Araglas]: O.o
2011-04-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-04-22 [Araglas]: ....why am I reminded of a mad tampon?
2011-04-22 [Pillowthief]: You had a tampon that looked like that? Pity you didnt capture it.
2011-04-22 [kians mummy]: it hated the smell of fish and this is what happend
2011-04-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: new counters? i have been away too long
2011-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Counters? What? We don't have any coun- oh, hell. Nobody move... *reaches for his buffalo gun on the wall*...
2011-04-25 [Pillowthief]: What? I thought we killed them all the LAST time. Why would they- The Evil Tampon of Doom. Nekko Fox has doomed us all... *reaches for his zebra gun*
2011-04-25 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Gerald the Evil Tampon of Doom out of this. So what if he summoned a buffalo or two and maybe...just maybe he's the harbinger of the End of Days...doesn't mean he can't...




PARTY


*Nekko turns down the lights, hands out glowsticks and ecstasy, and pumps up the music. Gerald the Evil Tampon of Doom begins vibrating in a fashion that could be described as dancing. Several patrons closest to Gerald the Evil Tampon of Doom fall over, gushing blood and viscera from every orifice*
2011-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, cool dance! *Mort also starts vibrating, or rather, seizing violently*
2011-04-25 [Araglas]: PARTY!! *pops some ecstacy and grabs a binky and some glow sticks and proceeds to bash people with the glow sticks while chewing the binky and crying*
2011-04-25 [Paul Doyle]: Chuck Norris vs. Gerald the Evil Tampon of Doom . . . care to place your wagers, folks? Any over/under to cover the spead? and what is the spread, by the way?
2011-04-25 [kians mummy]: you know what, elftown is more boring than it use to be, the council, guards and all the other assess don't give two flying fucks on the way they make other people for, they don't care when they hurt people, its ok for them to do name calling, its ok for them to be bent, but when you do it, they have a go or ban you, my fiance was banned for herrassment, ie: name calling.


you lot do not have a clue what to do on here, you rely on normal members for work, well guess what you bunch of assess, i'm not going to be active for long if all you are going to do is put people down, and upset them, just because you wish to abuse the power.


if you want to ban me then fine, but you are only banning me for this is the truth
2011-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Those are the worst song lyrics I've ever-


Correction. Second worst. Darn you, Rebbecca Black! *puts down $500 on the complete destruction of the universe* Oh boy, I hope I win!
2011-04-25 [Pillowthief]: I think we just got called a bunch of assess. Im not even sure what they are or if it's an actual viable insult. *Looks under the chapter of Viable Insults/Bodily Harm/Threats Made By Alternate Personalities*


Ah, here we are. Assess, Bunch of. Fruit. Grows on vines, similar to Dickies (i.e. Bunch of Dickies). Insult Meter: Lame. Counter Insult: See chapter, Throw Dictionary at Head of Target.


And on that note, I'd ban him for herrassment too if he had done it to me! That's just cruel!
2011-04-25 [Nekko fox]: I think someone is being herrassed.


*Looks up herrassed in the dictionary. There is no such word. He sets the dictionary on fire for being lazy and not getting with the times*
2011-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Th-that was my autobiography. And there was a whole chapter about herrassment. It was chapter 1. Page 1. In a size 72 font. Embroidered with flames. It flashed neon green and made a screeching sound when you opened it. And there were only three pages in the book anyway. The other two pages were index pages that redirected you back to page 1... *the burning autobiography screeches uncontrollably and spits acid at passersby*...
2011-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: As for these two flying fucks, of course we're not going to give them to you. Do you have any idea how hard it is to catch these things? *the flying fucks rattle their cage* We lost three brave souls in the pursuit of these. Granted, all three were the result of my criminal negligence and misuse of a toaster, but still.
2011-04-25 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: God sent me a message to give to you.


'And lo! Swivel on it'
2011-04-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Funny, my stockbroker gave me the same advice. Then he stabbed me and took my wallet. I have the worst luck with stockbrokers... *starts doing shots of Windex at the bar*...
2011-04-26 God: I don't remember saying that.
2011-04-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: You totally did, dude. I heard you. So did Tom, the deaf mute that lives in the ceiling. Didn't you, Tom? DIDN'T YOU?! *jabs up into the ceiling with a broom*... *a loud roar can be heard*...
2011-04-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Yeah..call yourself all omnipotent, and you don't even remember that?


More like impotent if you ask me, butt munch. 
2011-04-26 God: *strikes the heretics with Lightning... Brand dental floss! Get that squeaky clean smile, fast!*
2011-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: MY TEETH!!! ...they're so clean and squeaky!
2011-04-26 [Nekko fox]: *Points at a tooth on the ground*


You mean that didn't fall out of your sputtering saliva hole? Good, we can cook it then.


*Makes a roast out of it. No one figures out how. Not even the chef*
2011-04-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: do we get to stuff it then..or?
2011-04-26 [Nekko fox]: No.
2011-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: WELL, LIKE IT OR NOT, SOMETHING IS GETTING STUFFED.
2011-04-26 [Nekko fox]: No.
2011-04-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Get stuffed.
2011-04-26 [Nekko fox]: No.
2011-04-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Non? pourquoi?
2011-04-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *takes a bunch of orphans hostage*


Is anyone gonna pay the ransom?! *waves a gun around*
2011-04-27 [Nekko fox]: Are they stuffed?
2011-04-27 [Pillowthief]: No.
2011-04-27 [Nekko fox]: No ransom then.
2011-04-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at a fat kid* I think that one is... *he starts crying*... *Mort laughs*...
2011-04-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh, well... uh... huh. I- I didn't want any ransom anyway! GAH! *kicks the fat kid and goes to cry in the corner*


What the...? There used to be a corner here. And a wall. And I could swear there used to be a parking lot right over there. *points at a graveyard, with the flaming wreckage of what used to be my car parked on top of three graves*
2011-04-27 [Pillowthief]: Sooo... we lost our defensive wall against the zombies? Where's my chainsaw? Who took my chainsaw? *reaches for his Boomstick*
2011-04-27 [Nekko fox]: No, Pillow, that's a broomstick.
2011-04-27 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: mm, fat kids..*goes into corner and starts munching on a spotty pubescent youth*
2011-04-27 [Aliz]: SPLOSH!
2011-04-29 [Pillowthief]: Get out of my soup you meddling little runts! Those leeks still have time to simmer! *sweeps something*
2011-04-29 @Not logged in user@: I have a leek.


Its in my pants.
2011-04-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I have a leek.


Its in my pants.
2011-04-29 [Nekko fox]: You have an undersized onion in your pants? HERESY!


*Burns the pants and worships the vegetable. But not you, you're just a caretaker for the Almighty Leek*
2011-04-29 [Pillowthief]: The leeks go in the soup!
2011-04-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: LOL :d


I mean I have incontinence-leak :P
2011-04-29 [Aliz]: *gets axe to chop off some leeks* :D
2011-04-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Bows before the Almighty Leek and licks it*
2011-04-29 God: *strikes Infinity Hypothosis with lightning*
2011-04-29 [Araglas]: *is wearing a lightning rod*
2011-04-29 [Nekko fox]: Good thing you were wearing that lightning rod, otherwise...Wait, no, it doesn't matter. Nevermind.
2011-04-30 [Pillowthief]: Yeeeaah. Totally wasnt expecting that one. *snaps into a slim jim* *Jim the Slim screams excruciatingly* *sucks out Jim's soul*
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: I was paid to wear it by this wierd old man...paid me in beans...
2011-04-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: I have a lightning rod.


It's in my pants.
2011-04-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *munches on Jim's delicious, savory corpse*
2011-04-30 God: Weird. I cant vote on that. *strikes sammie h with lightning*
2011-04-30 [Pillowthief]: Get off my Slim Jim!
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: >.>  <.< *steals God's lightning anf writes a childrens book about it, and makes millions and even gets a movies deal*
2011-04-30 [kians mummy]: *punches [Araglas] to make her realise its just a dream*
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: Exscuse me but I am a he! No matter what my my mother says, I AM A BOY! *goes and cries in the corner, mumbling about stupid moms and gender mistakes*
2011-04-30 [kians mummy]: sorry, i couldn't tell x)
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: Its ok I get it alot ^_^
2011-04-30 [Bipolar Nonsense]: *appears from a popped bubble* hahaaa Sad, I've heard of this wiki so many times and I finally come out to take a peek. Interesting wiki.


Reminds me of the new cartoon called "Bob's Burgers" 'cept this place is older than that show.
2011-04-30 [Bipolar Nonsense]: ..... I like turtles...
2011-04-30 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I like soup. ^^
2011-04-30 [Bipolar Nonsense]: me too :D
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: Did someone say turtle soup? *is holding bowl of hot soup with screaming turtle in it*
2011-04-30 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Pokes turtles before deciding to ninja it.* For a creamier taste you see.
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: I see!! What about mortifying it? Would that help the texture?
2011-04-30 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Well.


I thought about breaking wind directly above it. This should surely enhance and secure the flavor, leading to a vast aroma of mushroom- like undertones.
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: hmmmm...*eyes the dish* Possibly....
2011-04-30 [Pillowthief]: *the dish eyes Araglas back*
2011-04-30 [Araglas]: *jumps and drops the dish onto a table* Your sapposed to be screaming!
2011-05-01 [Bipolar Nonsense]: hahaaaa
2011-05-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: I AM screaming, dang it! *throws a salt shaker at The-Artistic-A*... *continues screaming incomprehensibly at crows*...
2011-05-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: HOFAKLGLSKGIOHOK?? ALKJFSHK!! *pulls out a knife* Do you want to die, crow?! DO YOU WANT TO DIE?!! Because if so, that could likely indicate a serious mental condition. You should seek immediate medical help. Depression and thoughts of suicide should never be taken likely, because they are really seri- TINY TIM, I TOLD YOU TO GO KILL YOURSELF, YOU WORTHLESS LITTLE JERK. NOBODY WILL EVER LOVE A GIMP LIKE YOU, FREAK... but, uh... yeah. Human life is valuable or something like that... *experiments on embryos*... *gets bored and throws them in the soup*...
2011-05-01 [Pillowthief]: MY SOUP! *pokes out Sagacious Turkey's eyes*
2011-05-01 [Nekko fox]: *walks in and orders something edible. With no such items being listed, he simply sets fire to the elderly woman sitting at his favorite table and consumes her leg*


Hey, what does a guy gotta do to get some service around here?


*He punches a toaster which was curiously plugged in at his table. It is a few moments before he realizes that he isn't in the dining area but in fact in the storage closet and the woman he set fire to and devoured was in fact a hobo who took shelter inside to get out of the rain. He promptly disposes of the carcass of the burned hobo into the soup pot and goes into the dining area, sets fire to an elderly woman (and grand kids. Don't want them seeking revenge) and eats her leg. He then punches her flabbergasted husband in the face*


Hey, what does a guy gotta do to get some service around here?
2011-05-01 [Bipolar Nonsense]: ow.... *gets hit by salt shaker and gets dizzy* What was that for... big jerk @.@ ow.... *throws empty beer bottles at Sagacious Turkey's head*
2011-05-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *detaches head and avoids the bottles*


Ha ha! Sucker, I-


*dies from Lack of Head Syndrome*
2011-05-03 [Pillowthief]: Eww. I had that once. Thankfully I got better.
2011-05-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *picks up a prescription for duct tape*


At first, I had that typo'd as "duct rape", which is a very, very different product.
2011-05-03 [kians mummy]: death poetry competition
2011-05-03 [Thunder Cid]:   


*points up*
2011-05-03 [kians mummy]: *looks at you with evil red eyes*
no!!!
2011-05-03 [kians mummy]: your a nothing, just like you try and treat us, your the nothing lol, nothing, nothing, nothing
2011-05-03 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-05-03 [kians mummy]: now that is fuckin funny
2011-05-03 [kians mummy]:   
2011-05-03 [kians mummy]:   
2011-05-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-03 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Come along and sing a song and join the jamboree... OR ELSE!
2011-05-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-03 [Flisky]: *pics take too long to load, is too lazy to wait* Damn slow computer. *kicks computer, then steals another computer so she can continue waiting for the pics to load*
2011-05-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-03 [Bipolar Nonsense]: lol
2011-05-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-04 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-05-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: That reminds me, Misty hasn't died in a while... *harpoons Misty's corpse, which already has three harpoons, sixteen bullets, a salt shaker, and a Frenchman sticking out of it*...
2011-05-04 [Nekko fox]: Hey, how'd my Frenchman get stuck in Misty?


*Tries, fruitlessly, to pull Jean Pierre from Misty's rank flab. He simply sinks in deeper, smoking a cigarette and acting like an elitist asshole*
2011-05-04 [Bipolar Nonsense]: lol poor Misty
awesome seal lol
2011-05-04 [Pillowthief]: You admire my Fail Seal? *clubs cute offspring of Fail Seal*
2011-05-04 [Bipolar Nonsense]: lol yes
2011-05-05 [Nekko fox]: *takes the Fail Seal and starts cudgeling Misty's carcass for eating his snooty French bastard. Misty's bloated, fetid meat starts consuming the Seal*
2011-05-05 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-05-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-05 [Araglas]: oooh oh oh my god...thats...epic...can't stop laughing...
2011-05-05 [Pillowthief]: Johnathan Vasquez. Cracks me up every time. *violently clubs a baby seal that refuses to die*
2011-05-05 [kians mummy]: that was funny
2011-05-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-05 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I'm liking these comic strip things.


*Does the comic strip tease *


Any more? I need the cheering
2011-05-05 [kians mummy]: oyy, penguin head, wheres god
2011-05-05 [Nekko fox]: I think he's off drinking children's dayquil and forgetting about us.


  

2011-05-05 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2011-05-05 [Sagacious Turkey]:   


  

2011-05-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-05 God: I've realized that pr0n is more important than your sad existence, sammie h.
2011-05-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-06 [Nekko fox]:   



  




^---Just like real life!
2011-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2011-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: This comic is no longer relevant...


  

2011-05-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-06 Chuck Norris: I also find this comic irrelevant, as I had previously traveled back in time last week...




And roundhouse kicked your mother while she was pregnant with you.
2011-05-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-05-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i want to know who voted this site as "friendly". I find everyone here, myself included. to be a bunch of assholes. This in itself is not a problem, i quite enjoy it. I was just wondering who was lying to mort so i could give them pats on the back... and maybe a cookie... maybe.
2011-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: As assholish as we are, we're still one of the friendlier and more tolerant wikis on Elftown.
2011-05-07 Chuck Norris: *roundhouse kicks Mort's mom in the FACE*
2011-05-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: hmmmmm chuck norris makes a very valid point.
2011-05-07 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooh well, she had a full life.
2011-05-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *says a few words for Mort's mom* ".... a few words"
2011-05-07 [Nekko fox]: *Puts his arms straight up as mort's mom's head goes sailing through some vertical posts*


GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL.
2011-05-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *changes scoreboard on the wall* Announcer voice- Mr. Chuck norris wins three to zero.
2011-05-08 [Sheamus Finn]: *Picks up Mort's mom's head and adds it to the soup*
2011-05-08 [Nekko fox]: *Takes the head out of the soup and backhands Shame-on-us Finn*


Dunkoff, you deep-fry the head in glass before adding it to soup LAST.


Sheesh, the newbies just don't know how to cook.


*Throws Mort's mom's body in the soup*
2011-05-08 [Pillowthief]: MY SOUP!!
2011-05-08 [Nekko fox]: *Points at the bathtub set on the counter* Hey, eat your soup quietly.
2011-05-08 [Pillowthief]: MY SOUP!!
2011-05-08 [Nekko fox]: Oh come on. It's gasoline and urine with bits of rat in it.
2011-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: PILLOWTHIEF'S SOUP!!!


Oh, wait... I don't care.


*punches Pillowthief and takes his lunch money*
2011-05-08 [Nekko fox]: MY LUNCHMONEY!


Oh, wait... I...


...


*Punches Pillowthief and rapes his unconscious body*
2011-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SHARONA!!


*punches Pillowthief and steals his ankles*
2011-05-08 [kians mummy]: [Tekkon KinKreet] a company actually votes for this site, we don't have a say in the matter if the site is friendly or not
2011-05-08 [midnight toker]: *randomly show's up and walks back out* "wth was that all about"
2011-05-08 [Nekko fox]: *Chases after Midnight Toker and proceeds to brutalize them with a variety of objects lying around in front of Bob's Diner, including, but not limited to, a dog, a Tyrannosaurus jawbone, Oprah, and super-heated radioactive vegetables (Only Available At Bob's Diner! Help's Kids Grow...Freakishly Huge!). He starts crying as he is drags the limp body back into the Diner*


You made me do this...I thought what we had was special and you ruined it with you talk of Communist conspiracies and always listening to that second rate music, dub step. Everyone knows pug step is better.


*throws the bloody, mutilated body in with the rest of the soup mixture, watching sadly as it froths and boils angrily. He then forgets what was going on and urinates in Mort's. Again.*
2011-05-08 [Pillowthief]: That wasn't Oprah! That was Aprah- the Oprah look-a-like! Mug her!
2011-05-08 [Pillowthief]: Wait. MY ANKLES!
2011-05-08 [Nekko fox]: And don't forget your virginity. That's gone too.
2011-05-09 [Sunrose]: Pansies..
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, you'd cry too if someone messed with your soup.
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: I wouldn't, I'm too manly. In fact I...OH GODS MY CUPCAKES ARE BURNING!


*Falls to his knees and weeps manly tears*
2011-05-09 Chuck Norris: They look pretty girly from over here in the corner.
2011-05-09 [Pillowthief]: MY VIRGINITY! Wait. I knew that was missing already. MY SOU- Ah, screw it.
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: Tell that to Jesus.
2011-05-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I stole your soul.


I eat them for breakfast like..


Mmm..tastes like soul.
2011-05-09 [Pillowthief]: *eats his soup* I always wondered what my soul would taste like. Wait. MY SOU- Ah, screw it.
2011-05-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *slurps* And washed down with a nice chianti
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: Fuck Chianti, Ouzo or Sampuka.
2011-05-09 [Worst Case Ontario]: You guys have everything except green eggs n ham :(
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Give it a week. Most of our food turns green eventually. Except the lettuce, of course.
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: No, that turns greenER.
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: Still trying to figure that out.
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *picks up some lettuce*... OH GOD, MY HAND!! IT'S TURNING GREEEEN!! *hand starts turning blue* GREEEEEEENN!!!! IT'S GREEEEE- Ah, screw it.
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: Quiet you.
2011-05-09 [Araglas]: Do we have any fresh zombies? We have customers wanting zombie burgers, but no zombies!
2011-05-09 [Pillowthief]: Tell that to Jesus.


*points to Jesus, who is angrily demanding zombie burgers, even though it's iconically ironic*


  

2011-05-09 [Araglas]: *stares at Zombie Jesus* Uh....We'll be right with you sir! *runs into the kitchen, then runs out* Anyone know a good necromancer?
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: I'm a practitioner of the necromantic arts.


*Summons Cthulhu who devours the Jesus zombie, half of the customers in the diner, and drives the world insane*


....Well, shit, I see what I did wrong. I used an Elder sign rather than a pentagram. Ha! Silly me. Well, now to move on to breaking out Zalgo.
2011-05-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Eh? Why you got a picture of my dad up there?
2011-05-09 [Pillowthief]: *Slices off a chunk of Infinity Hypothosis* And now we take this bread, as holy flesh... *gobble*
2011-05-09 [Pillowthief]: *talks with mouth full* Zalgo? Sholdgh gon wit the Chiaqualla. Dos mexicans know der stuff.
2011-05-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Take it from the butt..mmm Butt bread..
2011-05-09 [kians mummy]:    can i put this in my profile x
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: Quiet, no talking from the bread. Or from the monkey.
2011-05-09 [kians mummy]: so why are you talking
2011-05-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *farts on [Nekko fox]*


I said eat the butt bread goddmmit!
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: *blows away the fart with a convenient fan*


No farts for you.


*accidentally slices off the ass. And Sammie H's nose, just to spite their face*
2011-05-09 [kians mummy]: *chops [Nekko fox]'s tongue off* ha, try talk now
2011-05-09 [Flisky]: *watches the craziness and confusion, goes back to meal, which is trying to crawl off her plate, impales the poor thing with her fork and takes a sip of coffee before blowing it out again* Who changed my coffee for real coffee?
2011-05-09 [kians mummy]: *the coffee monster*
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: What, you mean like this? I have an excessively long tongue. You're efforts are futile and your trolling is weak, young grasshopper.


*Pisses in the coffee. The coffee monster dies*
2011-05-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *resurrects coffee monster by planting a cocoa bean inside [Nekko fox] 's belly.*
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: *Digests the bean. It was pretty easy. The monster didn't stand a chance*


Come on guys, this is amateurish, even for you.


*Starts breeding little goblinoid creatures and teaches them to recreate key battles in European history, smelting little metal weapons with which to mutilate themselves with. Shit is so cash until they start thinking of uprising*


No, my children!
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets stabbed in the shin by a goblinoid in Napoleon garb*


Alright, that does it!! *pulls out a chainsaw and starts chasing down customers*
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: ......


But yes, Sammie/monkey. Feel free to use that awful, awful badge. *resumes hacking apart an old lady with the chainsaw*
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: TREEEEEES!! TREES EVERYWHERE!!! *throws the chainsaw into a crowd of onlookers*
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: Damn it Mort, again with the trees. What did I tell you about manifesting your whims into arboreal creations? I told you gasoline works better, that's what!


*Starts pouring kerosene over the hookers in Mort's refrigerator and sets them on fire. Only one of them screams as the rest are too desensitized to give a rats ass*
2011-05-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: *rips the door off the hinges and bursts in*


*pulls out a banjo and starts violently strumming, while screaming nearly incomprehensibly*


HELL! HELL! FLAMES AND BURNING FIRE!!
PAW DONE RUN OVER A HORSE AND BLEW OUT A TIRE!
HE WRECKED HIS TRUCK!
I DON'T GIVE A FUCK!
THE AXLE DONE GOT BROKED
AND MAW DONE GOT CHOKED!
SHE HAD IT COMIN' THOUGH,
BITCH BURNT THE BISCUITS!!
SATAAAAAANNNN!!!!


Wait, wait... here comes the chorus...


BWAAAAGAAAAAAAARRRR!!!!
HAARAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
WALAAARAAAAWWWWWW!!! SATAN! SAAATAAAAAANNNN!!!!!
AGHKLJGLKSJKSF545466sfaFAJKG!!!!!!!!!!!!!


*starts foaming at the mouth and smashing the banjo against the wall*
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *listens from the rocking chair on the front porch, while whittling a piece of PVC pipe*


Ah reckon that there song is beautiful, boy. I recollect gettin' murried to that tune, one sweet summer night...


*starts gently humming and continues whittling the pipe*
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes to get a hooker for his usual afternoon mating session*


NNOOOOO!!! MY HOOKERS!!!! *a police officer looks up from his meal, but decides it's in his best interest not to ask questions*


Oh, wait... this is the broom closet...


*goes to the fridge and gets a charred hooker corpse and drags it into the street*
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: *calls out from the kitchen*


Mort, we're out of seasoning arsenic for the food, I've been having to use cyanide instead. Pick some up after your finish teaching your hooker her mathematics.


*the police officer looks up from his meal, then topples and starts frothing and seizuring violently on the floor*
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *returns 20 minutes later in a blood soaked dress*... tomorrow, she learns trig!


*throws a box of arsenic labeled "For rats" into the kitchen*


*notices the seizing policeman* Problem, officer? *trollface*
2011-05-09 [Nekko fox]: *throws the box back*


You know she on to Calculus you bastard. Now teach her right. And I wanted the 'For Humans' brand. This stuff tastes sweet, we can't use it.
2011-05-09 [Mortified Penguin]: The only other one they had was "For Elephants". We haven't needed that brand since Misty died... The unused boxes we used to have are stored in the air ducts, if I remember correctly.
2011-05-10 [Nekko fox]: Really? I thought we kept those in the cat food...
2011-05-10 [Pillowthief]: Cats? We havent had a cat around here since the last rat ate it. *points at the opossum that's chewing on Tiny Tim's corpse* Stop playing with the rats Tim, you lazy good for nothing cripple! Get back to your manual labor!
2011-05-10 [Nekko fox]: *Picks up Tiny Tim's corpse and throws him into the garden out back, the one filled with concrete chunks, weeds, rusted steel rebar, a hobo, and pack of feral interns*


Mow the lawn!
2011-05-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *the hobo starts gnawing Tiny Tim's leg until the interns snatch the corpse away for themselves*... *a fights breaks out that somehow kills Tiny Tim even further*...
2011-05-10 [kians mummy]: take a look at my profile, see whats on there
2011-05-10 [Pillowthief]: Oh. hurray. A sad eulogy to the old Bob's Diner, that Sunrose and Pixish murdered. *screams at the interns in Russian, which of course, is where we bought them from*
2011-05-10 [Nekko fox]: *The interns look very confused as the angry Russian abductor screams at them. they start warbling in a complicated guttural language of clicks and grunts and start flinging empty cans of four loko and leaves at each other*
2011-05-11 [Pillowthief]: I am your Master! Obey me! *clubs an intern, crushing it's skull, just to show them who's in charge around here* *flails arms against chest and screams incomprehensibly*
2011-05-11 [Pillowthief]: *PETA shows up and tranks everyone. They haul away the feral interns and almost [Pillowthief], before they realize that he was never housebroken and therefor worthless to them*
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *waves as the interns get hauled away*


PETA's probably going to just euthanize them all anyway rather than spend the money to care for them or to find them homes. It's cheaper that way.


*Starts drawing up the plans for the ten-thousand square foot freezer PETA ordered to store the carcasses of all the animals they kill*
2011-05-11 [Araglas]: O.O
2011-05-11 [Triv]: A Mr. Penguin sent me an invite to (Assumedly) join you fine fellows.
I am lost, intrigued, and oddly reminded of /b/.
Carry on the good work, Gentlemen.
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *Waves a pencil at Triv* Shut up and pull the dogs out of the freezer. We need to let those thaw before we can forget to cook them before serving them to our customers.
2011-05-11 [Araglas]: *pokes Triv* Just do as the fox says...it may say bob's diner, but he pretty much runs the show here >.> *starts wiping the tables down with lighter fluid*
2011-05-11 Chuck Norris: *roundhouse kicks the Fantastic Mr. Fox, killing him instantly* Guess that makes me the quasi-boss around here now, doesn't it? *glares around the room of zombies that are waiting for their brain-shakes and fries, hoping someone will speak up against his authi-tah*
2011-05-11 [Pillowthief]: Uh... I guess that's the end of that. Crap, why couldn't he kill him after the movie? Im still on chapter 4 and now I'll never know what happens!
2011-05-11 [Triv]: Lighter fluid? Bah, use kerosene. Smells better and leaves things -extra- crispy.


*Noms on a frozen dog haunch*
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *Walks in and looks at splattered Mr. Fox everywhere*


Goddamn it Chuck, We're running out of guys named Mr. Fox for you to splatter across the walls. And who's going to finish the plans for the PETA freezer? Not me?


*Blows a dog whistle the summons the Kraken which promptly drags Chuck Norris off. It also steals the frozen dog haunch*


GODDAMN IT.
2011-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper*


Mmm hmm... *takes a shot of whiskey*


*goes back to reading the paper*
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *The Kraken takes the newspaper*


GODDAMNIT!
2011-05-11 Chuck Norris: Not the fiiiiiiiiiiissssssssshhhhhh......!
2011-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: RELEASE MY NEWSPAPER, KRAKEN!


*the Kraken does nothing of the sort*


It's just as well. I can't read anyway...
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *the Kraken takes the whiskey*


GODDAwwhatever...
2011-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: RELEASE MY WHISKEY, KRAKEN!


*the Kraken does nothing of the sort*


It's just as well. I can't drink anyway...
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *the Kraken takes some of the customers, presumably for snacks. Or maybe for poker buddies. No one notices*


*Nekko is busy drinking the last of whatever was in that bottle somebody left in kitchen*
2011-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his car manual*


Mmm hmm... *takes a shot of bleach*


*goes back to-*


*starts seizing on the floor and vomiting on customers' shoes*
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *Calls out from the kitchen*


Hey, who drank all my bleach?
2011-05-11 [Mortified Penguin]: DGDKLSNH4W4OY4WYLK!!! *spews more vomit on a British gentleman enjoying a cup of tea*


"I say!"
2011-05-11 [Nekko fox]: *Looks outside* Oh, here it is. Right next to my Vomit-Inducer Elixir.


*Drinks his bleach and starts seizing on the floor and vomiting on customers' shoes*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, what do you think you're doing?! You're totally stealing my moves, bro! *a heavyset black fellow starts beatboxing while I seize and vomit some more*


Yeah, yeah! Check it, son! *does half a flip and crashes into a table full of businessmen, before vomiting on their suits and food*... *the audience starts clapping*...
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *Gets up and starts stabbing the people who clapped*


I warned you! I fucking warned you all about clapping! NOW YOU DIE!


*starts gathering up drivers licenses and goes to all the residences to...finish the job....*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *the audience sees people getting stabbed, but, thinking it's only part of the show, starts clapping louder and cheering*
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *Stabs Mort....you know what, just because*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: You stabbed me! Right in the body! One of my hundreds of thousands of weaknesses! How... How did you know?! *dies violently on table 3, spitting blood and kidney juice all over a screaming family*
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: Damn Mort, chill, it was just magic trick!
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *rolls over on top of a birthday cake and voids his bowels all over Johnny, a sobbing child who is turning four today*


...a what now?
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: You know... MAGIC! *Throws confetti made of shredded cans into the faces of sobbing children. They react in the obvious manner of cheer, screaming and rubbing the hands over the bloody eyes and faces*
2011-05-12 [Araglas]: *wipes down more tables with gasoline*
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *throws confetti on the gasoline*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, Magic, right! I was always more of a D&D guy though... *rolls dice*


Ooooh, a 15. Sorry, Johnny. Not enough for a saving throw. *pulls out a pistol and starts firing wildly, as people run in terror*
2011-05-12 Chuck Norris: *rolls a two* Shit, not enough for a saving throw! Sorry Johnny, you have to die...
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *Rolls a one* Wow, a critical failure*


*A Balrog devours Johnny Bravo. But man is he pretty*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *beautiful women are unaffected by Johnny's gruesome death*
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *No one considers it a tragedy*
2011-05-12 [Sideways]: *Suddenly an enormous mech warrior bursts through the east wall, levelling massive vulcan chain cannons at the staff of Bob's Diner.* THIS IS THE HEALTH INSPECTOR! YOU ARE BEING SERVED WITH eight--hundred and---sixty---seven HEALTH CODE VIOLATIONS!!! SUBMIT NOW TO FURTHER INSPECTION OR FACE PENALTY UNDER section 56--dash---B--of the People and Citizens of Elftown Killed By Bob's Diner Act of Two Thousand and Eleven--EXECUTION!!!
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper*


Uh huh, yeah... deliveries go around back...


*goes back to laughing at the obituaries*
2011-05-12 [Sideways]: Health Inspector: PRESENT Morticious Penderguin TO MY SCANNERS FOR ID TESTING AND SERVING OF HEALTH VIOLATIONS, AND COURT SUBPEONA! YOU HAVE TEN SECONDS TO COMPLY!!! *Vulcan cannons begin whirling and whining in start up mode*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up again*


Turnips? I didn't order no stinkin' turnips! Eh... whatever... just put them in the freezer with the radishes...


*goes back to the paper*
2011-05-12 [Sideways]: Health Inspector: VOICE RECOGNITION OF Morticious Penderguin CONFIRMED! YOU HAVE BEEN SERVED!!! *Vulcan cannons fire a continuous barrage of stacked court documents that bury Mort and crush several customers at nearby tables* COMMENCING INSPECTION!!! * the mech warrior slams into next wall leading into the kitchen, shining blinding scanner lasers over everything, also washing the room in ultraviolet light, revealing a near continuous coating of organic fluids, germs, and other grime illuminated in white*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *slams down the newspaper*


You givin' me guff, boy?! *starts furiously slapping the mech warrior's shins*
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *walks in from the kitchen*


Hey, who's the asshole bathing my germ cultures in ultraviolet light? Huh? Was it you, you big tinkertoy?!


*He walks over and kicks some child's tinkertoy, knocking it and breaking it*


Oh, hey, looks like Mort is introducing the new delivery boy to our HR policy. Hey, new kid, turnips go around back with the radishes.


*Continues not cooking the chicken before he puts it in to some cold broth for the old folks because somehow that makes it easier to chew*
2011-05-12 [Sideways]: Health Inspector: VIOLATION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *The Mech Warrior emits a gargling, high pitched noise that sounds like hundreds of words, some repeating and therefore somewhat distinguishable, sounding like "blood", "semen", "sulfuric acid", and "toxic chemicals."  It then turns and fires a fullisade of court documents and fines into the spine of Nekko. Turning to see the gasoline covered tables and stacked corpses of children, the Mech whirls and attempts to bury Mort in more court documents, only succeeding in burying itself up to it's jointed wast in legal papers.
2011-05-12 [Sideways]: Health Inspector: V-V-V-V-V-V-VIO-VIO-VIOlA LAY LAY LAY LATION TION SHHHHHHHHHHHHH TION! *Vulcans begin dry firing after running out of court paper rounds*
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *Pulls one of the documents out of his spine and starts wiping off one of the tables he was trying to pin a customer to while he etched his name into the customers forehead*


Mort, you need to talk to the new kid. I think he's a bit overwhelmed by how wholesome our establishment is. Did you know B's D has been around for twenty years?...Wait, no, that ain't right. It was twenty hours. Yep, started by Grammy Shishkebob, who's recipes still live on to this day through the painful intestinal parasites we give our customers. Also, we're out of dog food. What am I suppose to serve, cereal during breakfast rush?


*Kicks the broken remains of the child's toy across the room when he's done etching his name into the customer's forehead and muttering how time is man-made and doesn't adhere to proper quantum physics structuring. He misspelled his own name on the customer's forehead, but that's because spelling is for chumps and Physics is where it's at*
2011-05-12 [Sideways]: Health Inspector: VIOLATION PARAMETERS EXCEEDED! UNABLE TO SERVE AND PROTECT! ERROR -- three--three--four--pathway not found---Windows Vista will now close!EXECUTING PRESERVATION MODE!! FLEE OR PREPARE TO DIE!! *the mech warrior commences to fire full jacketed 12mm explosive rounds at Mort's face. Only the mech's vulcan cannon are jammed with the wrath of the Elftown justice system and the gun arms of the mech explode, setting fire to the mech's own funeral pyre of subpeonas. The mech collapses, burning.* ERROR!! SOMEONE SET US UP THE BOMB!! YOU HAVE NO CHANCE TO SURVIVE MAYYYYYKKKK YURRRRRRR TYYYYMMMMMEE *Convieniantly the sprinkler systems come on and shower the mech with Misty's fat, putting out the fire and drowning the Diner in the stench of bacon, motor oil and burning silicon*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from an intriguing court document*


Uh huh... yeah... around back with the turnips should be fine, but I really don't recall buying any rutabagas...


*notices the mass destruction and corpses piled everywhere*


OH MY GOD!!! ...I DO remember ordering rutabagas! ...*goes back to reading the court document/subpoena/porno*...
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: Mort, would you help me put out the new guy? You connected the fire sprinklers to the gas line again and everything's burning. We need those rutabagas. Unless we don't.


*Goes into the kitchen, meandering through the conflagration un-fazed because he simply did not have the time for these types of shenanigans. He then sits in the corner and rocks on his heels, whistling Mary Had a Little Lamb while he waits for the problem to go away on its own*
2011-05-12 [Triv]: *Walks in*
... Glad I went on that beer run.


*Drinks heavily*
2011-05-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up at the sprinklers*... I don't know what you're talking about. They look fine to me... *the sprinklers start spitting sulfuric acid on customers for some reason*... *tries to flip the page on that intriguing court document, but notices his hand has been horribly burned and has fallen nearly completely off, due to the acid*...


Hmm... I could have sworn I used to have skin there... *shrugs and puts a band-aid on the bloody stump of a wrist*...
2011-05-12 [Triv]: *Notices the sprinklers while draining a bottle*


..Huh..


*Continues drinking. Notices the chlamydia-like sensation on his flesh*


OH SWEET LOUISA LOCKHART'S BOUNTIFUL BOSOM MY FACE AGHAAAAAAGHHHH!!
2011-05-12 [Nekko fox]: *leans out and yells at all the screaming people*


Keep it down, I'm practicing my solo for the performance tonight!


*goes back to sitting in the corner as he rocks on his heels, whistling Mary Had a Little Lamb*


 

2011-05-14 [Nekko fox]:   



*Shoots Kirby out of the sky*


NO ABDUCTIONS PAST NINE O CLOCK YOU IRRITATING LITTLE PEPTOBISMAL DIARRHEA CHUNK!
2011-05-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I think I'm confused.


Am I?


Why do people always think I'm a dude from my comments? :d


Its grand it is
2011-05-14 [Sideways]: I know you're female! *wanders in from the back room* pretty sure those there are boobs! *pokes Infin's chest*
2011-05-14 [Sideways]: Also you complain constantly and work in the kitchen :D
2011-05-14 [Nekko fox]: Oh, it was you who called me a grad? Well, Madam, I find THAT offensive TOO!


*He starts beating an elderly woman using Infinity as a cudgel*
2011-05-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Bloody hell! Be careful. Those bumps are British corn-fed you know. Only the breast! Free-range!
2011-05-14 [Nekko fox]: *Continues with his relentless beating of the elderly woman who began pleading through the blood welling up in her throat*


HA! Trying to trick me with pretending to give up are you? HAVE AT THEE MORE!
2011-05-15 [Araglas]: *whistles mary had a little lamb while slaughtering innocent mary's and lambs*
2011-05-15 [Pillowthief]: ->Infinity Hypothosis: You're on the Internet. Everyone knows that the guys are guys, the girls are 50yr old men, and the little girls are FBI agents.


ITS STILL 8:59 YOU LITTL- oh crap, I guess it is past 9pm. My bad.
2011-05-15 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: LOL..


I'm confused..so I'm a 50 yr old dude? AND a little girl? WOW! My chameleon-like attributes do me proud.
2011-05-15 [Pillowthief]: Therefor, you're a 50yr old FBI agent. Elementary, my dear Datson.


Wait, Datson?! Where the bloody hell is Watson? Out drinking again, you say? I will have him reprimanded!
2011-05-15 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Dyson?
You trying to say I suck?


Well, I do look rather well-kept for 50. No shit Sherlock.
2011-05-15 [Pillowthief]: Nonsense, Jack. All part of the job.


Back to work, slaves! *whip crack!*
2011-05-15 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You sir, are bloody weird. :P
2011-05-15 [Nekko fox]: *Cracks infinity in half and drinks the milky goodness*


Mmm, freedom.
2011-05-15 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Cracks out laughing*
2011-05-15 [Nekko fox]: *Sucks out the laughter*


Mmm, pleasure.
2011-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't spell 'pleasure' without 'pure seal'.


*a Navy Seal bursts in and shoots Bin Laden in the eye*
2011-05-16 [midnight toker]: spontanously combust....
2011-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: You can't spell 'spontanously combust' without 'Bou coons lust my pants'.


*a Navy Seal bursts in and shoots Bin Laden in the eye*


Cut that out!!
2011-05-16 [Nekko fox]: Nigger.
2011-05-16 [Nekko fox]:


Also


  



2011-05-16 [Pillowthief]: In other news: The President announced he will be convening this week to propose a solution to our rising debt problem. His proposal?


Shoot the debt in it's FACE, then dump the body in the ocean.
2011-05-16 [Sideways]: I believe the consensus is to cut spending on unions, public broadcasting, Medicare, social security, education, infrastructure, and everything BUT things that involve shooting people in the face so--- *looks around at who is present*. --- our politcians are GENIUS ;D
2011-05-16 [Pillowthief]: *Shoots Sideways in the FACE, then dumps the body in the ocean*
2011-05-16 [Sideways]: Awww man haven't you heard what those green freaks are saying about the ocean? Can't you dump my body somewhere more sanitary? Like a sewer?
2011-05-16 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-05-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: There's a lot of bloody murder going on here. So what gives?
2011-05-16 [Pillowthief]: Its a diner. Would you rather us be serving live animals? Then it'd be more like a petting zoo.
2011-05-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: hmmm..petting.


I would like to pet an orangutan.
2011-05-16 [Sideways]: An orangutan would wrap you in a bear hug with it's freakishly long arms and tard strength and squeeze your small intestines out your asshole. While smiling, and unusualy silent for a monkey. Then he'd rape your eyesocket. I reccomend petting a shark instead. That's also intrinsicly painful but you might live. *thinks about who he's talking to* though for good measure you can pet both.
2011-05-16 [Nekko fox]: "How cute! It’s that grin, that huge, toothy grin they flash for the cameras. It makes them look like devilish little scamps, like they have some great and hilarious secret they cannot wait to share. If you put a chimp in front of a camera with an action star, you have no choice but to prepare for a wild, wacky romp that will tug your heartstrings and tickle your funny bone until you vomit your entire digestive system in pure laugh-a-minute glee. Oh shit! Run! That is not a grin. That is a mouthful of very large teeth being bared. The chimp is attempting to inform you that you are invading his space. If you do not understand this, the chimp would be happy to elaborate—smashing his very long and extremely strong arms about your head and shoulders, grabbing your hair and slamming your head into things, all while shrieking a vicious symphony of noise that is calling all his buddies over to beat you until you cannot grow anymore. Then they pelt you with feces. On four recorded occasions in the past fifty years, chimpanzees have abducted, killed, and eaten human babies. That’s human with an h, as in a human baby getting wrenched out of its mother’s arms, dragged off into the forest, and devoured by a chimp. Will you please stop dressing them in cowboy outfits now?"


~Excerpt from You Might Might Be a Zombie and Other Bad News, pirated copy available in Nekko's diary and other locations where fine pirated goods are available.
2011-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I got down to the part about the presidents and decided I'd just wait for the movie to come out.
2011-05-16 [Nekko fox]: And then you became a rapist.
2011-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, heavens no! I've been a rapist for quite some time now.
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: I sent that message forty years ago.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: My apologies, sir. It appears [Elftron] is lying again then. *takes a crowbar to a screaming hobo outside*


Take THAT, [Elftron]!! *smashes his skull repeatedly*
2011-05-17 Chuck Norris: MY TIME MACHINE/OVEN/WASHING MACHINE!
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, crap. Apparently I'm not hitting hard enough. *continues beating the hobo*
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Mort, hit him again!


*starts eating Mort's Ramen...and then keels over spouting bloody froth from his mouth*


AHGHGGHHGHGHGGHGHHGHGGH! IT'S FULL OF RAZOR BLADES, SALT AND LEMONADE. MOSTLY JUST RAZORBLADES!


*Goes back to eating*
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *realizes the hobo was just an obsticle illusion*


Wait... obsticle?! Th-that's not even a real word!


"Yes it is."


Wh-who said that?!


"I did."


Oh, well I guess that settles that matter... *eats ramen*... the razors really give it a kick! Well, that and the legs I attached to the side... *the legs just dangle there, unenthusiastically*...
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: *Spits some bloody froth at the legs* MOVE DAMN YOU!
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *the legs somehow move even less than before*
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: *Punches the legs, launching them and the rest of Mort ramen through the air* TAKE THAT YOU FACETIOUS BASTARDS.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *the legs, angered, grow 200 feet and start destroying Tokyo*


*some jerk in a suit makes a pun* "My, that's a lot of feet! My legs only have two!"


*the jerk in a suit is violently stomped to death*
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey, these things happen.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: So true, so true... *casually eats ramen as customers are stomped and kicked somehow, even though the legs are apparently in Tokyo*
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: These things also happen.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: And those things?


*points at the legs tap dancing and destroying a small subdivision, while people flee in terror*


Do those things happen as well?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: No, that's your fevered imagination.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Thank goodness. Then that really isn't my car getting towed outside either, is it?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: You own a car?
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: No, but I own the keys to a car. A lot of neat stuff can be found in the corpse pile.
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: YOU TOUCHED MY CORPSE PILE?!
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: To be fair, it touched me first. *a hand reaches out and grabs at me* NO! CORPSES SHOULD STAY DEAD! *beats the hand with a shovel*
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey, leave Thing #386 alone. He just wants to give you a Him job.
2011-05-17 [Pillowthief]: Im not even sure what that means, but it sounds provocative.
2011-05-17 [kians mummy]: 968 273 255 6294
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: My vault combination!!!
2011-05-17 [kians mummy]: lol, look at your key pad on your phone, you work it out
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: My phone only has weird Arabic symbols on it.
2011-05-17 [kians mummy]: lol
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: I did. It spells out 4926 552 372 869, but is apparently supposed to be cleverly made backward. Lo, but only if you knew that only people with rampant dyslexia are allowed to make signs here at B's D!
2011-05-17 [Imperator]: *Kicks in the rotten door* WHERE'S that [Mortified Penguin]?!
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from the Mortified Penguin he was reading*


Yeah, deliveries are in the back. Hasn't changed.


*Goes back to chuckling as he reads Mort's appendix*


Oh Marmaduke, you stupid beast...
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Tee hee! It tickles when you flip my pages.
2011-05-17 [Imperator]: I WANT YOU TO KNOW I ONLY APPROVED THAT RELATION REQUEST BECAUSE IT WAS JUST SOOOO CLEVER.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I know, right?! And because I'm so handsome. Admit it. ADMIT IT OR I'LL START KILLING HOSTAGES!! *points at an empty corner* I'LL DO IT!!
2011-05-17 [Imperator]: Why would I care if you kill Misty??!!
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: You make a good point.


...which is why I want to hire you to make 50 Misty killing harpoons. Our old harpoon guy sucks at making points. *points at Captain Rehab, the drunken pirate at the bar*... *he looks up, grunts something about a white whale, and goes back to doing shots*...
2011-05-17 [Imperator]: I don't... Um. I don't make harpoons. How about I make you a harp and a couple of spoons and you can put the harpoons together yourself?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: *Flips Mort's pages*


I said deliveries are in the back. Get to it rookie.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a shot of bleach*


*starts seizing on the floor and vomiting blood and editorials on customers' shoes*
2011-05-17 [Imperator]: It's like the Huffington Post all over again.
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Huffington doesn't come til Friday, bub, and that get delivered in the front.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets up to comment on HuffPo* Only this time with a lot less bile being spewed everywhere!


*gets back on the floor and continues seizing*


Huffington was fired, though. His brother, Puffington, delivers the squash shavings now.
2011-05-17 [Imperator]: When does friscal year 10/11 end? August 30?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: No, it ends on you shutting the hell up. And yes.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Tuesday, August 30, 2011. At the moment, we're up to an average of 9.2076923076923076923076923076923 comments a day for this friscal year and steadily trending upward.
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Should I start spamming with comments like these?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Should I start spamming with comments like these?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Should I start spamming with comments like these?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Should I start spamming with comments like these?
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Should I start spamming with comments like these?


2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: Should I start spamming with comments like these?
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: MAYBE.


But I've constructed this graph to illustrate:


  

2011-05-17 [Imperator]: Ima freakin' Emperor! I have imported fox pelts lying on the marble floors of my taxpayer funded estate you ingrate!


Sooo, why is B's D in such an awful friscal slump? Is the general Elftown economy continuing to decline?
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: As you can clearly see, the comment number is steadily trending not only upward, but also backward, sideways, and, on occasion, into the 9th Dimension of Terror © Disney 2011.
2011-05-17 [Mortified Penguin]: But yes, due to [Hedda]'s frequent drunken pillaging, Elftown has been in a slump for years. Which is really not good for its posture.
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: *Plays Imperator like an accordion* WE NEED MORE MUSIC UP IN THIS BITCH!


*Rocks out as if he were playing a banana*
2011-05-17 [Jenny Crank]: Well..if thet Diner economy is bad..we should probably invade the middle east or something..
2011-05-17 [Nekko fox]: What are you talking about? We set up B's D in Israel.
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no. We were located in Pakistan for a while, then we moved to the middle of the ocean, since we got tired of all the Muhammad's Witnesses trying to blow us up. I don't remember if we ever moved to Africa or not. It certainly seems like it... *an angry group of black guys look up from their fried chicken platter*
2011-05-18 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: BANANA! OMYGOD
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: Well..maybe when China repossesses America they'll have an economic plan we can copy..smart little bastards..
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Laughs. Hysterically. After several hours, he brings himself under control and takes a breath* Sorry, thought of a joke. And no, China's economy is shit. And if the the States called in all their debts that most other countries owe us, the world would go bankrupt. Blame those stupid oil barons and gas company executives, they never were all that bright. *an angry group of well dressed white guys look up from their baby seal platter and shaved gold*
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: I'm going to blame Hillary Clinton..because I can.
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: I blame Homer. Stupid lazy ancient Greek Poet who influenced the course of theatre and drama with his dumb story "The Iliad" and loving donuts so much. *an angry group of well dressed Greeks look up from their gyros and pizza and other crazy shit Greeks eat*
2011-05-18 [Sheamus Finn]: *adds crude oil gravy to the baby seal heads* *shoots one of the executives and takes his wallet* Gold card? What the hell? *Shoots another and passes his wallet to Mort*
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: Well, don't forget Ghandi, that little pussy always gets off the hook.
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: Are you kidding? Ghandi was a bad-ass! Did you know in his younger years he could kill a man just with his left hook? It's true! And then he started starving himself. Oh, and he had severe halitosis.
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, what?! This is my wallet anyway! Get away from my table!! *continues his meal of baby seals with shaved gold*


I blame the Mexicans for all this. *an angry group of janitors look up from the place on the floor where they were sleeping and grunt incomprehensibly, before eating some burritos and chugging tequila*


GET BACK TO WORK, DANG IT!!!
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *One of them half-heartedly picks up a broom before setting it down and vomiting semi-digested burritos and tequila on Mort's baby seal*
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: Dont you know about the tradition of the Mexicans, they are required to nap, and eat frijoles,nothing more,or less.
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: That's a myth propagated by the Brown Menace to oppress the white man!
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: Then we shall stop them, let us all march to home depot to begin the attack.
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: Nah, they'll just throw refried beans and it will get on my shoes.
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Wear bowls on your feet. That way, we get to overthrow the Brown Menace © Disney 2011 and also get free beans to serve our loyal customers! *points at a cowering group of children sobbing in the corner*
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Starts picking through the children, discarding several by throwing them into the incineration chute, and selecting several others*


Okay men, get your guns.


*the children look terrified and confused*
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: HE SAID GET YOUR GUNS!!! *slaps a short kid holding a gun, knocking it out of his hands* GET. YOUR. GUNS. *inexplicably points at an empty corner*... *some kids start sobbing uncontrollably*... Oh, you want to do this the hard way, huh? *picks up a baseball bat and starts smashing [Pillowthief]'s car*


...*eats ramen that came from the trunk of the car*... OW, what the heck?! ...*pulls out a golden ring*... *some Elvish words written on it start glowing red*... what is this crap?! Damn Japanese and their cheap ramen... *tosses the ring into the incineration chute*... *keeps eating ramen*... *falls asleep in the trunk*...
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Throws the incineration chute into the incineration chute. Reality bends to accommodate this apparent logical fallacy*
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *the incineration chute, having been destroyed by itself, is no longer able to destroy itself because it destroyed itself out of existence, thereby returning stability to the universe somehow*... Whoa, where was I just now...? ...*punches reality*... *the universe explodes*...
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Creates something identical from the pieces of the old* Fucking lazy super-explosive universe...
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: Guns...what good shall guns do you...Soap is the greatest enemy of this menace!
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Soap is only good for fighting the French.
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: What military intelligence are you running off of Crank, CIA circa 2002?


*everyone laughs at the war on terrorism reference. Two people start wailing and sobbing uncontrollably*
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *Dick Cheney just sits and glares*
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Tries to punch Dick Cheney in the face but is forcibly repelled hundreds of centimeters by his glower of steel*
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: These things happen.


*Dick Cheney turns his gaze on me*


OH GOD, IT'S MELTING MMEEEEEE!!!! NNNNNOOOOOOOOOO- *eats a bite of ramen* -OOOOOOOOOO!!!!
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you're covered in Hydrochloric acid, it's not Cheney.
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I thought that bottle of lotion had an unusual amount of warning labels on it... *arm falls off*
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Goes diving the fuck out of the way of that crazy arm. It scuttles outside and starts panhandling*


  

2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *Dick Cheney gives it a dollar*


*it goes from panhandling to manhandling*


NNNOOOOOO!!! That was one of my top three favorite arms!
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: You have two right arms?
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure do. *points at a pile of arms on the counter*


I also got three left arms, a middle arm, two right legs, and a tentacle. Bidding starts at $5.
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: I'll give you this chewed shoelace for the tentacle.
2011-05-18 [Pillowthief]: MY CAR! Give me back my shoelace! What'd you do with my shoe?!? WHERE IS MY ARM?!?


Goddammit, you teamkilling fucktards- just because Im lagging, does not mean you can steal my crap and mutilate it/pawn it/force it into prostitution. Im seriously gett- HOLY CRAP, THEY SETUSUPTHEBOMB!


2011-05-18 [Pillowthief]: Oh. I guess not. Just kidding.
2011-05-18 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Oh man. I could do with an extra pair of arms/ Gimmie! I shall trade you half an M&M (Yellow, not the good stuff, red) and a piece of lint I found in my pocket. And not a penny more, sir!
2011-05-18 [Nekko fox]: *Smacks Pillow with Infinity and takes the tentacle, casually tossing the shoelace into Mort's gaping orifices. He pays someone to surgically attach the tentacle to a place where one would most certainly not expect to find tentacles*
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: MY ORIFICES!!!


*orders more corks*
2011-05-18 [Pillowthief]: *Scratches his teeth hair* I believe you have something of mine, good sir(kill!)...
2011-05-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, yeah... I forgot... *hands Pillowthief a large stack of Hustlers, an even larger stack of Bustlers, a liver, and three bags of cocaine*...


Yep... I think that's it! *eats another shoelace*
2011-05-18 [Jenny Crank]: OMG He's turning into Charlie Sheen now..
2011-05-18 [Sheamus Finn]: *Gives Pillthief a hunting knife* Here go kill ottomans....
2011-05-18 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *rubs her sore head, and proceeds to kick Nekko fox, pillow and penguin in the tentacles*
2011-05-19 [Donate to Elftown!]: *sneezes*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Pillthief?! *checks pill bottle*


Damn it all, that Viagr- er, heart medication was expensive!!


I'm sorry, heart. No more medication. *the heart gets angry and attacks*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY. Cover your mouth when you sneeze. We don't want the food getting tainted! *points at the food pile on the floor*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *His tentacles crushes Infinity's skull. It was a minor inconvenience on its way to WORLD DOMINATION*


Damn it tentacle, calm down, World Domination (Rated M for Mature, only on XBawks) doesn't come out til September.
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: wtf!?


I NEED that skull dammit. I need it for bowling on Saturday fs. They oughta close this place down
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: They did.


*Gestures with his tentacle at the door that was boarded, barred, locked, chained, bolted, soldered, nailed, cemented, bricked and fenced shut*


*He then points at simple hole cut through everything which people and dogs were walking through on the other side*
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: Rawr! Give me some effin shakin bacon! I don't give an eff if it's dinner time. XD
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *a graceful deer bounds in and violently mauls Famous Shinn's face*
2011-05-19 [Akayume]: meow.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Bacon? BACON?! YOU WANT SOME #(%*^*@%(* BACON?!!?!?! *angrily punches the wall* WE AIN'T GOT NO BACON, YOU PIECE OF-


Oh, wait. Here's some bacon. *eats bacon*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: My bacon! *Eats sausage*
2011-05-19 [Akayume]: Is that a euphemism?
2011-05-19 Chuck Norris: *Roundhouse kicks Akayume in the euphemism*
2011-05-19 God: *Roundhouse kicks Akayume in the uterus*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: And yes. It's a euphemism for you being roundhouse kicked. Twice.
2011-05-19 [Akayume]: Or a penis? It's oke, you can admit you like sausage. *wink*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in eating sausage* Huh?! What's going on here?!
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *Pokes Akayume in the eye with sausage* Everyone knows I'm a rampant bisexual.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *also pokes Akayume in the eye with sausage, which is just a euphemism for bacon*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid Elftron! I didn't say to put a line break there!
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: There. The BO tag works better.
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: Niggers did it.
2011-05-19 [kians mummy]: no racist comments
2011-05-19 [Pillowthief]: So its ok to make fun of white people, but no one else? Thats counter-racist, you racist.
2011-05-19 [Sideways]: Wait, I was pretty sure the rule was " No Ignorant Comments," which, Sammie my dear, is a rule you've broken about thirty-seven thousand times...
2011-05-19 [kians mummy]: well nekko has been reported
2011-05-19 [Sideways]: Fine! *goes to report you for multiple instances of wiki harrassment and spam* you wanna play that game sista?!! I'm OG at dis sheet, son!
2011-05-19 [Pillowthief]: So this plane is going down- the captain comes on and says, "Attention: we're overweight and need to drop some people, so for the good of everyone else, Im going to unfortunately have to ask for some people to come to the front and jump off the plane. We're going to do this fairly, we're going to do this alphabetically- Would all the African Americans, please come up to the front of the plane and jump out."


A little kid turns to his dad and says, "Isnt that us?"
His dad smiles and says, "Not today, son."


No one moves. The captain comes on again and says, "Ok, would all the Blacks, please come up to the front of the plane and jump out."


The son turns to his dad and say, "Isnt that us as well?
The dad turns to his son and say, "No, son, not today."


No one moves. The captain comes on again and says, "Alright, would all the colored people, please come up to the front of the plane and please jump out."


The son looks again to his dad and says, "What about now?"
The dad turns and says, "No son, today, we're niggers- we go after the mexicans."
2011-05-19 [kians mummy]: fine by me, they will only say that i was not asked to leave a wiki, i'm reporting nekko as it was very racist, and i'm sure [Mortified Penguin] will sort of agree with me, its one of the worst things to say and it is wrong, and if it was me then that is one word i would ban people for good off elftown for
2011-05-19 [Pillowthief]: (kinda is hypocritical Sammie H!- you came to the one wiki that makes fun of more people than any other wiki on ET and then try to ban people for it. No one is racist, and on top of it- you're white! What are you getting your panties in a twist for?)
2011-05-19 [kians mummy]: where have i put that
2011-05-19 [Pillowthief]: *clubs a random albino seal* You were asking for it!
2011-05-19 [Pillowthief]: Where have you put what? Did you misplace something? *clubs another albino seal/walrus*
2011-05-19 [Sideways]: Yeah you've been reported Sammie. I am willing to bet anyone a ten billion dollar check signed by me that you will get banned FAR before anyone in Bob's Diner! And when you think about that, sugar, you should be very, very ashamed of that fact!!!
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: Stop fighting let's just have our effin breakfast, damn! lol
2011-05-19 [Thunder Cid]: *with the cracking of the stormy skies and a loud and hearty laugh, [Thunder Cid] enters the diner!*...forgot my keys.
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *Giggles because the new kid finally noticed the racism*


I'm wondering how many times I've made that exact statement. And considering we've been making fun of Misty for...Mort, how long have we been beating on Misty now? Year and a half? Two? More or less? Whatever. And Pillow pointed out, this wiki is practically designed to make fun of people. I think you're in the wrong place if your sensibilities are so inclined to be offended.




*Proceeds to not give any shits whatsoever and sit on Cid's shoulder*


Hup hup Simba, hup hup!
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Moves into Diner, and makes a den under the table.*


Nobody knows I am here!


Oh wait-
2011-05-19 [Thunder Cid]: I can kill you with my mind.
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: DO IT SIMBA! KILL INFINITY WITH YOUR MIND. HUP HUP!


*Is now riding a small Chinese man around the room, beating at his flanks with what appears to be Sammie H's brain. It is a tiny, quaint thing, better suited to smaller, basic concepts and narrow-minded opinions. Also, it's got the label "SAMMIE H'S BRAIN" taped to the side in Mort's handwriting*
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Go ahead. I got plenty more life where that came from. I'm as immortal as that cat paper towel- in -ass dispenser, I'll have you know.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in from somewhere that isn't here, followed closely by a multi-ethnic gang* Damn niggers, spics, chinks, gooks, and punjabs!! *slams and locks the door*


Anyway, *takes off his white hood and robe* I agree with [kians mummy] on this one, you guys. Racism is a disgusting thing (almost as disgusting as those filthy wetbacks, amirite?). Here at Bob's Diner, we promote diversity *points at the janitorial staff, which is made up of five different races, all of which are lazy and NEED TO GET OFF THEIR ASSES AND START MOPPING THE DAMN KITCHEN*


But in all seriousness, we intend on stamping out racism. After all, racism is a crime. And crime is for nigg- wait, we've made that joke before. *starts screaming at his Jewish joke writers* YOU BIG NOSED KIKES, I SAID I WANTED FRESH MATERIAL! DO YOU WANT ME GAS YOU? HUH?! DON'T THINK I WON'T!!
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: *comes in for a custom sarcastic shake* Yum bitches.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: If it's a shake you want, I suggest trying the bleach. *takes a shot of bleach and starts shaking and seizing violently on the floor*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *Finally dismounts from the ragged and heaving Chinese guy, kicking over tables and the occasional tree frog habitat, then notices his tree lights are tangled*


  



Or maybe it was Sammie.


*Puts up a comic-sequence picture of Sammie H being butthurt*


  







Alright, now who wants to barbecue?


  

2011-05-19 [Mystin]: No I want mine added to the menu!
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: MY LOWER CASE 't' STATUE!!
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't got no menu! *kicks the menu in anger*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *Looks at the barbecue*


That was art? Shit....
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: I bet the Jews did that too....
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: *goes to sit with kellan lutz before freddie kills him* Now this is real yum!
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *Shakes Sammie's hand*


Welcome to Bob's Diner. Obviously you are new here, both to B's D and The Real World (now with Hi-Res Graphics. Ratings may differ during online play) where people think outside of the box and tend to not be offended by words and find that giving words power (i.e. getting unjustly butthurt over words) is about as silly and pretentious as being new to the website and white knighting all over the place.


*Screams and vomits blood as he is skewered by THE White Knight, Sir Calgary of York, brandishing his Platinum Lance of Truth*


Damn it Ted, quit fucking around.


*Ted Calgary, the White Knight of York, hangs his head and mumbles an apology before walking off to stab someone less rude, dragging his Platinum Lance of Truth behind him*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Freddie is just so handsome. I've been having dreams about him all week! *sits and fantasizes*
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: lol, you can't fall asleep!!!
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: 



Oh, hell.
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, silly Mort, you know if you fall asleep the Shadow Demon's will eat your eyes and defecate in your soul.
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: SHIT! JIGGLYPUFF!
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: Does the diner have any musical entertainment?
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs the Platinum Lance of Truth from Ted and starts wildly stabbing*


Yes! I got it, I got i-


Oh, wait. That's Kirby. *flings the corpse off the lance*... *it lands in some British guy's soup*...


"I say!"
2011-05-19 [Alexi Ice]: Reporting people on Bob's Diner is stupid! This is one of the only places on ET where no one gives a shit what you say!! Hahaha!


  



JOIN THE HIVE!


  

2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Akane, that was completely uncalled for. You should be ashamed.
2011-05-19 [Alexi Ice]: Make me! *Stabs Ted the random...thing*
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: OMG, now I'm shamed for coming here *bows head and leaves diner*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *looks up from the Gutenberg Bible he was inexplicably reading*


Thanks for being ashamed at Bob's Diner, come again soon.


*goes back to laughing at the nonsense in the bible*


Oh God, you petty, vindictive asshole, your escapades are the best. Wait, this isn't my Gutenberg, it's a KING JAMES BIBLE!


*Proceeds to burn the book and throws the ashes in the air like some kind of hellish confetti*


Now all we need is a sign saying 'Welcome to Silent Hill' and that limbless monstrosity that vomits acid on customers will feel right at home.


*throws more ashes. The monstrosity seems incapable of cognizant thought and simply kills and eats two customers before regurgitating them on two more customers who promptly start screaming and melting. Being store policy, their screams for help and pleas for a quick death are ignored*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I am NOT a monstrosity!! *vomits acid on some British guy eating crumpets*


"I say!"
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: Aww, look! Mort and the Monstrosity that will sing the song that ends the earth can be friends!


*the Monstrosity vomits on Mort. It seems almost surprised when the vomit has no effect and instead splashes on a table and a wailing widow*


Well, as they say, take out whole families to avoid problematic, and cinematic, revenge scenarios.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Does it still count if I'm the one that keeps saying that?
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: Yes Mort, you can be plural.
2011-05-19 [twitchboy]: Mort i can catch the damn super meat boy! (piece of meat with eyes explodes from the kitchen and flies across the room screaming something about dr fetus.) Kill that bastard hes todays special! (chases after with a knife)
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I lay my eggs before you all.


Look at my wares. Freshly laid this morning. *Do a little dance, do the funkeh chicken dance* Anybody else done any laying recently?


*Pokes the others for signs of life* Egad's! Bob cooked and ate you all! Now, the other, other white meat..dang. How' d it taste Bob?


*Shoves microphone into Bob's face, narrowly missing the huge tonsils of death*


Dang, you nearly swallowed my mic.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *another [Mortified Penguin] walks in, looking rugged and handsome*


Hey, you sexy bastard! Get out of here!


"No, YOU get out of here, handsome!"


I will STAB you in your finely chiseled face!


"BRING IT ON, BEAUTIFUL!!"


AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGHHHH!!! *Mort tackles himself*


*a fight breaks out, but it eventually turns into an orgy somehow*
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: My god. The charms of narcissism is upon us, and it aint hot.


*Watches orgy with a bemused looked on her face*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *Looks on, bemused, confused, and enthused, but mostly just refused*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *Looks on, used, bruised, and amused, but mostly just fused*


Wait, fused? NNNOOOOOOOOO!!! *merges with a table*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *becomes Mortified Table*


"Now, with twice as many legs as before, Mortified Table roams the world, saving the day from injustice!"


*Mortified Table bursts into some old lady's house*


That table is OAK, YOU BITCH! PUT A COASTER UNDER YOUR DRINK!! *points at a plastic chair with nothing on it*... *smacks the old lady around with his mighty table legs, while she screams in horror*


*Mortified Table flies away, as the house violently explodes below, killing everything in a 12-mile radius*


"Once again, Mortified Table has saved the day!"
2011-05-19 [Flisky]: *roasts some marshmallows in the aftermath of the explosion*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: PUT SOME COASTERS UNDER THOSE MARSHMALLOWS.
2011-05-19 [Flisky]: *puts a coaster under the marshmallows* Um...my coaster is melting.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: PUT SOME COASTERS UNDER THOSE COASTERS.
2011-05-19 [Flisky]: *makes a tower of melty coasters*
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *coasts by on a coaster held up by a coastered coast*


Bitches, don't be hatin'.
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Family Fun Park and Hardware Store would now like to introduce you to the Coaster Coaster! It's a 100-foot tall roller coaster that plummets quickly to the ground, while coasters are launched, at speeds of over 200 mph, upwards, into the face of everyone riding the coaster. All surviving passengers will then be ejected from their seats and propelled into the sky, where, after free falling a few thousand feet, assuming they aren't taken out by a helicopter from Bob's Family Helicopter Tours and Drug Deals, they will eventually land safely on a pile of corpses.


*children cheer and start lining up*
2011-05-19 [Pillowthief]: I... amazingly enough, have nothing to say.
































*clubs another albino walrus/leprechaun*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: RIDE MY COASTER. *points at his crotch*


*pulls the blueprints to the coaster out of his pants*


As you can see here, it's really fun!
2011-05-19 [Flisky]: *throws melty and burning marshmallows at no one in particular*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: MY FACE!!
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: Oops, sorry.


*Puts Mort's face back on after having violently ripped it off in a drunken rage*
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, much better... *eats ramen*... *face falls off again*... *eats face*...
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Which face? Top or bottom?'Cause if it's bottom I gotta tell you, I think it's outlawed in 14 states at the very least
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Middle.
2011-05-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Oh well that's alright. Middle is very doable.
2011-05-19 [Nekko fox]: You did Mort's face?
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: I'm back if were done being unnecessary and rude
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sure we are. We're usually pretty civil, I don't know what came over us.


It definitely wasn't a roof though, because we don't have one of those.
2011-05-19 [Flisky]: It burned down...with the rest of the walls...
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: BUT WE WOULD THOUGH IF THOSE LAZY MEXICANS WOULD FIX IT ALREADY.


*Paco, Jorge, Gomez, John, and Pedro angrily look up from their tequila and burrito platter*
2011-05-19 [Akayume]: ...Has anyone seen my Frito Bandito recently? I seem to have lost him in the 70's....
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: I'm going to perform hallelujah tonight on this burnt ass table so sit your ass down. I'll even take off my mask...
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *is the table*
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: You know what, eff it. You say there's no rules let's grab some strobe lights and illuminate this bitch. Let's party!
2011-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *an angry group of strobe lights look up from their platter of electricity*
2011-05-19 [Mystin]: lol
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: IMPORTANT:


.,?!'-/:;()$&@"[]{}#%^*+=•¥£€><~|\_.,?!'


That is all.


2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU WATCH YOUR MOUTH, YOUNG LADY.
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: And I didn't even have to use a single vowel. :D
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure that ampersand counts as a vowel.
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *googles it*


Yep, Ampersands are vowels as of 2007.


*Goggles it too*


Yep, it LOOKS like a vowel now...
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *gargles it*


Yep, he's right, it's-


*chokes to death on the ampersand*
2011-05-20 God: Does a pound sign. With his hands.
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *a portion of mankind is tamped flat by God's pound sign*
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Take THAT, North Dakota!
2011-05-20 [Bookwyrm]: OMG Shakin' bacon!


That's the BEST kind of bacon!
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: How dare you, madame! That bacon clearly has Parkinson's.


*takes a bite*


Yep. Parkinson's.
2011-05-20 [Pillowthief]: *several confused pakistanians look up from their 72 virgins*
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: That's 72 Virginians. They got it wrong...
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: Eight hours since the last comment is unacceptable! *pokes Mort in the eye with a stick*
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *Several angry, inbred hicks look up from their deep-fried Twinkies and pictures of Misty*
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: *smushes Twinkies with stick*
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *the rednecks stare blankly at the stick protruding from the desecrated mass of Twinkies. Grunting (as Rednecks are incapable of speech, we all know) at one another, the fry the who thing up, and seem cheered at the invention of Smushed-Twinkie Deep-Fat-Fried on a Stick.*
2011-05-20 [Sideways]: Who wants to see snobs get PWNED?? Sideways here, shamelessly supporting my tirade against ET elite roleplayers and ET snobbery as a whole! come find out the hidden message and win a prize! The Prize being the transcript of an actual individual snob getting utterly pwned by their own ignorance in a message chain! Even if you don't agree with the core message, come to


Don't take the c.u.r.e.



and support your right on Elftown to disagree and protest! Please feel inspired to make your own protests and pwn your enemies Sideways style!!


FIGHT THE SYSTEM! BE HEARD! FORM YOUR OWN OPINIONS! FEEL NO SHAME WHEN OTHERS TRY TO DISCREDIT YOU AND YOUR RIGHT TO AN OPINION AND OPEN DEBATE!
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from the porno he was reading*


Yeah, deliveries go around back.


*goes back to laughing at some chick crying*
2011-05-20 [Mystin]: Hey [Sideways] your always welcome to share this at Crew Manual where the council can share it's opinion on it.
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: I'm Protesting!


  

2011-05-20 [Sideways]: Yay! you can even protest me if you want to. ;) Just bring some damned attention, positive, or negative to my wiki. Make your own protests. Preferably valid ones, but you can protest eggs, and republicans, religion, dogs vs. cats, the meaning of the lint in your belly button, I don't give a crap! MORE CONTROVERSY DAMN YOU! ET is getting boring and BORING PEOPLE SEEM TO BE IN CHARGE! Debate, you slothful bastards, debate!
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: God hates fags? *Puts on reading glasses*.
Oh, flags!
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: (god loves himself on a regular basis)
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Waldo is in a 42-foot high state prison for pedophilia.
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: also in a copyright infringement battle with Wally.
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe you left a period off on your link up there.
2011-05-20 [Flisky]: *snorts with laughter* Empty link is empty. Hahaha.
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Are you the Nazi police? I'm 28 for christ sake. Getting on a bit.
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, I am a member of the SS. *flashes badge/genitalia* I'm gonna need you to come with me.
2011-05-20 [ScottJo]: God enters the building in the magnificent guise of [ScottJo] Arches his mighty brow, strokes his beard and shakes his head at the state of his creation.  *Anyone seen my razor? I seem to have misplaced it*
2011-05-20 [Sideways]: Thank you, Don't take the c.u.r.e. is the wiki ;) Again, it's to raise awareness of elitist douchebaggery on ET. Particularly in the roleplay context. It's also an example of my own angry intellectual masturbation. However I want it to be perceived not just by it's message, but as an example to reasoned discourse, inciting controversy, and expressing unpopular ideas. Free speech is an art form. Get to Expressing yourself xP


Again, please write your own ET protests (unless you think Elftown is a shining beacon of God's love and completely free of suck.)


My goal is to eventually popularize a meta-wiki of protests, ideas, reviews and opinions. So please express yourself!
If anyone feels up to some frickin' interesting exchange of ideas on here anymore...
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Oh yeah. But you gotta come to me.
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoots your face with a hookshot*
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: Hey, don't get meat on the hookshot, cleaning that shit is a bitch. Especially because niggers took my cleaning supplies to sell so they could afford an education. Stupid teens trying give themselves a future! THIS IS AMERICA, THAT DOESN'T WORK HERE.
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Those BASTARDS. *grabs his ethnic hunting gun off the wall and storms into the ghettos*


*returns moments later, brutally beaten, missing two fingers, and slightly on fire*


Apparently, they don't take too kindly to me shooting their younglings.
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *Pats out Mort's flaming haunches and steps back to admire their handiwork*


No...No they do not.
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Grabs hold of Mort by the hair, and spins him around and around, so fast that the g-force strips his flesh clean off of his bones* 
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *tries to sit down, but notices he's completely missing a torso*


What?! When did this even happen?!
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *staples his flesh back to the bone*
2011-05-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Too late. I barbequed it.
2011-05-20 [Pillowthief]: You have to push smack on them first. Then you can move them up the ladder, give them a gun (all while making money for you, of course), then you can storm the ghettos. People will call it a travesty, but in the end, you make money and get to shoot people. Which is all OK with me.
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Sugar Smack is all the store had. Will that work?


  

2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: *slaps [Nekko fox]*
Get ahold of yourself!
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, the judge advised him not to get ahold of himself in public anymore. Not after that last incident with the elementary school.
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *sobs controllably*


Wait, nope, I'm fine.


*Controls it.*
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: *wants photos of the court and elementary school*
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *hands you photos of [Pillowthief] doing incriminating things*
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: *does unspeakable things involving mashed potatoes*
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes photos for future reference*
2011-05-20 [Mystin]: WTF
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: *investigates possibility of making Mort Mayor for taking most useful reference photos Elftown has yet possessed*
2011-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *Makes Mystin the next candidate for Presidential scandal*
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]:   
Can I use this in my house?
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Only if you BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: Thank god Satan.
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: I didn't realize that it wasn't all one graphic. But I'll keep that "I" safe for now. Maybe.
2011-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Take good care of the old girl. Feed her and wash her (sensually) every night.
2011-05-20 [Nioniel]: *nods*
2011-05-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: NNNOOOOOOO! Not our "I"!!


*punches [nokaredes]*
2011-05-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: /co/'s Buttman Comic
2011-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah ha ha haa... OH GOD, NO.
2011-05-21 [Paul Doyle]: Fun  regarding the recent ET drama. And yes, bob's diner is mentioned!!!
2011-05-21 [Nioniel]: That's a pretty big poll you've got there...
2011-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: That's... what she said?
2011-05-21 [Nioniel]: Well, yeah.
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Way to kill the good streak we had going with the comments, [Nioniel]. We had a few hundred comments in a few days and BAM! You commented and now look at us.
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Now
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: have
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: to
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: do
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: this
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: to
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: keep
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: up
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: the
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: average
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: and
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I-
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: what?
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: No,
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: we
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: don't
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: serve
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: kosher
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: you
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: stupid
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Jew!
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Now,
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: what
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: was
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: saying?
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: yeah
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: my
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: poptarts
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: are
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: burning.
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... MY POPTARTS!!
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: SPIT 'EM OUT, TOASTER!! *punches [Mystin] in the gut*
2011-05-22 [Nioniel]: *shamed*
2011-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Pats Mort on the toaster, trying to comfort hi. He burns his hand and in his pain-filled rage he heaves the toaster through space-time until it collides with the earth at catastrophic speeds around 47 million years prior.*


Oops, sorry about that Mort. You prefer your poptarts fossilized, right?
2011-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a bite of the... fossiltart... popfossil? whatever*


Hmm, seems a bit cold. *pops it back into the microwave/[Mystin]'s esophagus*
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *dramatically bursts in from the luxurious skylight above*


*dies from severe glass related wounds*
2011-05-23 [Mystin]: >.<
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *bleeds on some British guy, eating a scone*


"I say!"
2011-05-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *blandly crawls in from the shoddy grounddark below*


*doesn't die from any dirt related wounds*
2011-05-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: You guys get raptured or what? Where's e'rbody at?
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I thought I did for a while, but it turned out I had just been kidnapped. I probably should have realized when the angels started mugging me. Or when they raped me.
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: I thought I was raptured, but then I realized it was just gas. I was a balloon for three hours after that before they finally changed me back.
2011-05-23 [Sideways]: I was super disappointed the rapture didn't happen ;_;  As an athiest, I was hoping the worlds entirety of superstitious crazies were right, just so they'd all suddenly disappear and the world we be a much less overcrowded utopia full of reasonable, non-oppressive people.


But, sadly I am still right and the nutjobs are still here :/
2011-05-23 [Pillowthief]: What if the rapture actually DID happen on sunday and no one was taken? Does this mean we're all going to hell?
2011-05-23 [Thunder Cid]: We'll know in October.
2011-05-23 [kians mummy]: [Sagacious Turkey] and [Mortified Penguin] what a load of old shitters
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from the car manual he was reading*


Deliveries go in back... *points at the large Sarlacc pit*
2011-05-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Pulls up a chair and sits down* Alright, I'll have an egg, sunny-side up, and a side order of ovaries.


[Pillowthief]: Nah, it happened alright. He came, he visited, stopped at K.F.C and got carjacked. We were judged on our fine cuisine and social culture, we just didn't know it.
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Did he get the Double Down sandwich?!
2011-05-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I think he got E-coli actually.
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Same difference, really.
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: What do you expect when you have a bunch of incestuous rednecks cooking for a bunch of listless niggers.


*A bunch of incestuous rednecks and a bunch of listless niggers get up from their deep-fried meal and promptly start beating Nekko with a length of hose*


Oh God why! I never did anything to you! Beyond the endless tirade of racial slurs, church burnings, and impromptu falcon-punch abortions, not a thing! Why me?


*Is buried in a cavalcade of violence. After a while, he opens a door in the mountain of angry people and steps out for a breather and smoke, pausing to falcon-punch a baby in the face before going back in to resume screaming and being beaten viciously*
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes a break from all the punching to get a dip, hitch up my overalls, and make out with my sister, pausing briefly to picket a funeral and burn a Koran, before grabbing a length of horse and continuing the smackdown*


Wait... a length of horse? *glances at the horse leg I've been using as a beating device*... *shrugs and continues beating*...
2011-05-23 [Mystin]: *pie in the face to [Mortified Penguin]*


long overdue. sorry.
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: MY STRAWBERRY RHUBARB SALT AND H2SO4 PIE! HOW COULD YOU?!
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: RRRRAAAAAAAHHHHH!!! *angrily rips his wife beater off and smashes a beer bottle over Tiny Tim's head*... *wipes the strawberry rhubarb salt and H2SO4 pie off on his sister/wife's dress*


*savagely beats his sister/wife* Woman, you go back to the trailer and whip me up sum o' dat possum pie I like! Now GIT! *shoves her into traffic, before grabbing his length of horse and continuing beating Nekko*
2011-05-23 [Mystin]: Hey I'm sorry man but I had to do something!
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: *Cries in semi-mortal agony at being beaten by a length of horse wielded by a sociopath. Also, Mort has a horse leg and is hitting him with it. He laments being beaten and the loss of his pie*
2011-05-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I got pie. Anybody want some?
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: Is it H2SO4 pie?
2011-05-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Nope. Its apple pie. You get a little cream with it too
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: MOTHERFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
2011-05-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Pardon? Are you being mean??
2011-05-23 [Nekko fox]: Yes. Wait...no. Hm. Maybe.
2011-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats his Cobalt, Carbon, and Potassium pie*


Wait... Co..C..K...


Oh, ha ha, bakery chemists. Real funn- *dies from ingesting too much Cobalt and Carbon*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]:


Flourine, uranium, carbon, potassium
Bismuth, technetium, hydrogen, einsteinium,
Germanium, thulium, oxygen, neon, yttrium.
2011-05-24 [Sideways]: Lols at everyone ignoring actual offensive comment made by self.* racism? Racism isn't offensive, it's mainstream! You wusses! Get rebellious xP
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: *Lols because it wasn't offensive*
2011-05-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in, wearing a slutty outfit*


Ah, what the hell? *glares at Nekko* You're wearing the same outfit?! DAAAANNG IIIIT! *storms out*
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in, wearing nothing*


*scratches his crabs beside table five, where a young couple are trying to have a romantic dinner*


Oh, hey! I need to borrow the ketchup, you guys. *climbs over the table, dragging his various genitals over the young lady's steak dinner*... *Mort's massive genitals knock over a candle and set the young man on fire, but, being the gentleman he is, he simply sits there and burns quietly without making a scene*


Wait, nevermind. *throws the ketchup away* I need the barbecue sauce. *starts climbing across a table where a bunch of nuns are praying*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: HEY! You! Stage hands! Quit moving the "Mort's Massive Genitals" gag stageprop around the diner. Put it on someone and leave it alone.


*Four guys, now smoking and watching the burning gentleman grumble something incomprehensible that has to do with workers comp and dangerous work environments and pictures of Mort's disease prawn blown up to four-thousand times magnification before dumping it on a homeless man out front* 
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *the homeless man, Mort's mother, screams in horror*


Mommy, nnnooooooo!!


*Mort's mom commits suicide*


*Mort gains +2 depression*
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Suh-weet! *Mort pops anti-depression pills/Viagra/Skittles*


*Mort has acquired Happy Rainbow Erection*


*women flee in terror*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: *Serves Happy Rainbow Erection frappuccino. The women flock back because they are a bunch of elitist assholes*
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *drinks a tall Happy Rainbow Erection frappuccino*


Man, this is some good stuff. What's in it?
2011-05-24 [Mystin]: *throws chair out the window in a panic rage from food poisoning*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: *the window throws the chair back in a panic rage of being shattered into hundreds of jagged, stabby portions. It also thinks you smell like lug nuts and churros*
2011-05-24 [Rick-P]: *Watches Mystin freak out* ??????
2011-05-24 [Mystin]: *punches [Nekko fox] in the face, it's on*
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Food poisoning? No, no. That's not possible. Not here at ob's D ner. *points at the broken down sign outside*... *the 'e' falls off and crushes a guy in a wheelchair*...


Here at ob's D n r, we believe in cleanliness and serving our customers only the freshest tainted beef available. Why? Because we care. The government tried to tell us not to use trans fats, but you know what? We still do, because we know our customers like them. They said no more high fructose corn syrup, so we doubled the amount in all our food! Because we value our patrons. And when the government told us, "Stop serving ground up corpses in your salad. Your court date is May 5th. We hope you burn in hell. Love, the FDA. <3" did we listen? No! Did we show up in court? NO! Why? Because WE VALUE OUR CUSTO- *the FBI bursts in and starts throwing flash bangs and tear gas*
2011-05-24 [Rick-P]: Ah! *Hides* I just got here! QAQ I'm innocent!
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: "He's innocent! Get him!" *the FBI gangs up on [Rick-P] and starts violently beating him with riot shields and batons*
2011-05-24 [Rick-P]: AH! *Throws some money on the ground and runs for it*
2011-05-24 [Mystin]: I'm so sorry [Rick-P]!!! This is all my fault.
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: "He's throwing money on the ground! Get him!" *a group of accountants gang up on [Rick-P] and start savagely beating his face with rolls of quarters*
2011-05-24 [Rick-P]: *Gets behind Mystin* Help me! QAQ
2011-05-24 [Mystin]: Nice! *Ducks*
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: "He's getting behind Mystin! Get him!" *a group of confused people get up and look around*


"Wait, who are we getting? What's going on here?"


*they shrug and start beating [Pillowthief] with Harry Potter books*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: "They've got Harry Potter books! Get him!" *A large group of Twilight fans start savagely murdering eachother and everyone around them, screaming about their desire for sexual relations with the undead. They use Mystin as a cudgel and take the cashier counter by force, making demands and threats to whoever is listening, brandishing the bloody and bedraggled Mystin like a bulky, lumpy knife. No one seems interested and so they go back to savagely killing one another over which is their preferred form of sodomy, bestiality or necrophilia*
2011-05-24 [Rick-P]: *Is terreified but what he's seeing.* QAQ
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: YOU!


*Points imperiously at Rick-P*


HOW ARE YOU DOING TODAY!?


*Doesn't wait for your response*


QUIT AVOIDING THE QUESTION! WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE, THE QUEEN OF ENGLAND?!


*the Queen of England looks up from her spotted dick and crumpets, looking confused and horrified*


"I say!"
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: ANSWER THE QUESTION!!


*angrily backhands the Queen of England, knocking her to the floor*


*the Queen, enraged, pulls out her ceremonial nunchucks and starts twirling them and doing amazing flips*


Oh, Goddamnit. *gets viciously beaten to death by the queen*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: *Screams*


Oh God...


It's...




IT'S....




QUEEN






  

2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Freddie Mercury bursts in and starts manhandling people with a microphone*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: OH GOD, DON'T STICK THAT THERE!


*Is screaming at one of the office temps who is trying to push a fork into a power outlet. With a shriek of pain, the temp is flung across the room by the electric current. Nekko stomps over and starts hitting the temp with a rolled up newspaper, now smoking and convulsing in a family's nachos*


Bad! Bad temp! You're wasting electricity!
2011-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Dude, stop it! What are you doing?!


That's my newspaper. Here, use this instead. *hands Nekko a medieval flanged mace*... *the temp, clearly dead at this point, releases his soul, which starts ascending to heaven*


Where do you think you're going?! *grabs the soul and starts punching it in the face* You don't get off work until 2am!! *jams the soul back into the charred body*
2011-05-24 Raziel: *rips a spear off the wall and mightily hurls it, impaling the undead intern. He then quickly makes sucking noises to gather the soul and replenish HP before the soul fades into the ether*
2011-05-24 [Paul Doyle]: Flash *boom* a-ahh 
2011-05-24 [Thunder Cid]: *Mark Harmon walk in and checks the temps pulse*


Dead $#!%...*blames the jews*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: And that is the story of how the Universe began.
2011-05-24 God: ORLY?
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: You should know, you were watching.
2011-05-24 God: You're right. I was there, you weren't. That's it. I totally not rapturing you.
2011-05-24 [Mystin]: *Walks back into the diner w/broken ribs...what's for dinner?*
2011-05-24 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses out some ribs, recently broken and smoking odorously* I dunno, I ripped these out of some critter that was bleeding in the road. Couldn't tell what was, but the ribs are good.
2011-05-24 [Thunder Cid]: *Cajuns look up from their gumbo then go back to speaking French*
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I just viewed the house of every single active member of Elftown. What have YOU done today?! *shoves an EMT*
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *the EMT, enraged, pulls out his ceremonial nunchucks and starts twirling them and doing amazing flips*


Oh, Goddamnit. Not again. *gets viciously beaten nearly to death by the EMT, who is promptly called back onto the scene to resuscitate me five minutes later*
2011-05-25 [Sideways]: Rappels from the hole in the ceiling wielding glow sticks and glitter. The lights suddenly go out, and out of nowhere house music starts blaring*


Rapture time!!!!! that's right ladies and germs, there's ecstasy in your food and mescaline in your Coca-Cola! Feel God's Loooooooove!


Bass starts to vibrate senior patrons out of their booths onto the floor,where they are immediately devoured by flesh eating bacteria and mutant carpet mites*
2011-05-25 [Nekko fox]: *sets fire to vibrating senior patron's flesh eating bacteria with today's soup special*
2011-05-25 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You are a git nekko for telling me F U
2011-05-25 [Nekko fox]: Hey, you're the one that...wait...I'm confused.


*Looks up the minutes of their last meeting*


Nope, never happened.
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, you did say "Forget Uranium!" in the soup-of-the-day discussion. We ended up going with Boron. But maybe that's what she meant?
2011-05-25 [Nekko fox]: I thought the conversation went with me ending with "Flying Utopia" and then we discovered Atlantis.
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no, NO! You dolt! I keep telling you that wasn't Atlantis, it was just Cuba! UGH.


*Aquaman approaches* "Um, actually... that was Atlantis. Seeing as how Cuba isn't underwater, I thought you would have guessed. Plus, we have the big neon sign saying, 'Welcome to Atlantis' and we gave you those brochures and maps and stuff. Y-you're wearing an 'I went to Atlantis and all I got was crabs and this lousy t-shirt' shirt right now!"


Hey, listen buddy. Do I swim underwater to Cuba where you work and smack the dolphin dick out of your mouth? No? Then piss off. I'm workin' here. *pushes Aqualad to the ground*


*Aquaman, enraged, pulls out his ceremonial nunchucks and starts twirling them and doing amazing flips*


SONUVA- *gets beaten to death for like the eighth time today*
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, you worthless, flea-bitten plugs. What is this nonsense?


  



HUH? You're gonna let that worthless piece of garbage Akane calls a wiki beat us (no offense, Akane)? The Slave Trade has 27 fans, the highest number on Elftown and what do we have? A measly 17?! *spits in Tiny Tim's face* Go click the freakin' fan button, so we can crush that loser (again, no offense, Akane) and kill her hopes and dreams and aspirations and family and goals. Then we can finally take our rightful place at the top.
2011-05-25 [Nekko fox]: Wow, the worst of luck follows you around.


*Tucks away his Mort Voodoo Doll in his rear pocket, various black cats and nunchucks glued to his face*
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort walks in, stepping over several of his own corpses*


I know, right? *sits at the bar and takes a shot of milk*... *this clearly upsets a black cat with nunchucks for some reason and it starts twirling them around and doing amazing flips*... *Mort, keeping up with his usual routine, doesn't even come in contact with the pussy*


Oh, ha ha, Action Between Asterisks. Real funny. Jerk.


*Mort, being the loser he is, gets punched in the face by a professional boxer, who then proceeds to rape him*


HEY. CUT THAT OUT.
2011-05-25 [Paul Doyle]: *kills end-of-the-world preachers with fire* 
2011-05-25 [Nekko fox]: *The End-of-the-world preacher, enraged, pulls out his ceremonial nunchucks and starts twirling them and doing amazing flips before beating Mort to death and raping his corpse*
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort walks in, stepping over his latest corpse, but tripping over another one*


Hey! Watch it, freak! *kicks his corpse*


*Mort's corpse, enraged, pulls out his ceremonial nunchucks and starts twirling them and doing amazing flips*


Wait, what?! I don't even have any nunchucks!


*the corpse, realizing this major plothole, stops doing backflips and cartwheels and simply lies back down and starts decomposing*
2011-05-25 [Pillowthief]: There, you have another fan. It still keeps saying we've only rolled a 12 on our D20 though. That's mediocre, and not even enough for a saving throw.
2011-05-25 [Thunder Cid]: *Mark Harmon and Mel Gibson look at corpses and continue blaming Jews*
2011-05-25 Jews: *Jews roll for save!* Crap. Another 12.
2011-05-25 God: *God sends Rain of Sulfur!*
2011-05-25 Jews: *Jews roll for save!* Crap. Another 12.
2011-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't think the Jews have ever managed to roll a saving throw.
2011-05-25 [Nekko fox]: Not on my watch.


*Herds a bunch of Jewish children into the FUN ZONE/industrial oven. Gets beaten by the parents, but later convinces them to go after the children because the FUN ZONE/industrial oven is full of MONEY!/fire*
2011-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: MY INDUSTRIAL OVEN!


Do you know how long it takes to get the smell of burning Jew hair out of an oven?! A long time!!
2011-05-26 Mossad: What?! I've discovered a Hamas front! Hands up, you terrorists!!
2011-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from the porn he was reading*


Uh... in a minute...!
2011-05-26 [Nekko fox]: *Takes the pron and throws it into the oven with the jews. The screaming takes a whole new tone*
2011-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: MY PRON!


Do you know how long it takes to get the smell of burning Jew hair off of a magazine?! A long time!!
2011-05-26 [Nekko fox]: *Buys you more porn. It's amputee/scat/bukkake/bestiality porn. The shipment was late coming in anyway*
2011-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *the shipment arrives* My favorite! You know me too well. *takes the porn and climbs into the trunk of [Pillowthief]'s car*
2011-05-26 [Pillowthief]: MY CAR!


You know how long it takes to get amputee/scat/bukkake/bestiality porn smell out of a trunk?! A long time!!
2011-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets out of the trunk, setting the car on fire on the way out*


*casually walks back in, while the car explodes in the background, killing two passing hookers and a pimp*
2011-05-26 [Big Ste]: i like to eat hamsters for my lunch
2011-05-26 [Nekko fox]: MY PIMP!


You know how long it takes to get pimp scraped up off the sidewalk after a car explosion? NOT LONG AT ALL.
2011-05-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You are all going to hell. I've seen the list. Damn you ALL screwed.


Know how I know?


'Cause I'm the Grim Reaper. And I'm 'gonna whip all you lilly-white bitches. I'm coming for you.


*Tears the head off niece's hamster*


Hey, do we have any pickle to go with this?
2011-05-26 [Big Ste]: plenty, *reaches for the pickle jar*
2011-05-26 [Nekko fox]: *Smashes the pickle jar* HA!


Now you are damned with us! Oh...


*picks shards of glass out Big Ste's hand*


Eh, whatever.


*Goes back to reading Jewish porn. It's very boring.*
2011-05-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Porn is for the damned. Now give it here.


*Thumbs through pages.*


You're right. It is boring. Where are the elephants and the badgers?(
2011-05-26 [Nekko fox]: *Points at the Bukkake/bestiality/amputee/scat porn that Mort was hoarding*
2011-05-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort hisses from behind his bukkake/bestiality/amputee/scat porn pile and takes a swing at a passing family, who promptly leaves and goes to Denny's instead*
2011-05-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: whats scat porn? Tell me, now!
2011-05-26 [Thunder Cid]: It's what Mort's mommy did to pay for clown college.
2011-05-26 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Well, at least the clown makeup would hide the scat
2011-05-26 [Nekko fox]: *Uses clown make-up to bombard the Denny's, laughing hysterically as the Denny's is smeared into a nightmarish caricature of culinary dining*
2011-05-26 [Aliz]: Clown wig too? :D
2011-05-27 [Sheamus Finn]: Big shoes & rubber nose? 
2011-05-27 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Flower that squirts water at people? Or battery acid?
2011-05-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *jazzily walks in, snapping his fingers while a bass plays from somewhere and a guy in the corner plays the bongos*... *inconspicuously grabs a small child and continues dancing on out the back door*... *the people in the diner, oblivious to the kidnapping, simply clap and return to their meals*...
2011-05-27 [Aliz]: I hope for your sake that wasn't the child we planted a bomb in =/
2011-05-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *as the snapping dies down in the distance, a sudden explosion rocks the diner*... *pieces of Mort rain down like sulfur on the unsuspecting crowd of people below who, oblivious to the explosion, simply clap and return to their meals, which now have a second cour(p)se on top of them*...
2011-05-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Respawning in 10...9...8...7......


*Mort walks back in, or rather, stumbles after climbing through the open/missing window*... *the people in the diner simply clap and return to their meals*...


Cut that out, damn it!!
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Mort, quit confusing the patrons by changing your name.


*Goes to the court to change his name to Lord Von Galgameer Bon Huffenstuff*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his concubine*


I say!
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: GODDAMN YOU LORD GALGAMEER BON HUFFENSTUFF, SIR! *eats ramen*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from a line of cocaine*... hmm?!
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Backhands Nekko's cocaine*


Not until you're done cleaning the industrial oven of all that Jew hair and porn magazine residue.


*starts snorting it off the chest of the elderly woman who gets splashed with a mountain of cocaine*
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *the elderly woman starts smashing at Mort's head with her purse while her husband is having an epileptic fit. Mort finishes, wipes his nose, and goes off to find something else to do while the woman is splashed by the scalding soup her writhing husband was eating before his flailing limbs knocked the bowl into her lap*


*eats ramen*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Nekko, having injected the elderly man with bleach and Hawaiian Punch and forcing him into an epileptic fit, eats the old man's remaining soup and rummages through the old woman's purse for peppermints, mothballs, razor blades, condoms, and other old person stuff*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Pillowthief bursts in, having just finished a night of hot passionate sex with a mentally retarded, AIDS ridden goat, starts pummeling a nun with breadsticks, before whipping out his two-incher and jamming it into an electrical outlet*
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
2011-05-28 [Thunder Cid]: NO RACIST COMMENT! HURR DURR
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Sorry, I like to be pretentious and regurgitate humancentric gibberish based on concepts and ideals that were implanted in my mind at an early age, thus proving I am incapable of thinking outside the box and forming my own opinion tee hee lol rofl isuxcox
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: I'm also averse to sex, and men are pigs always trying to get women down! LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL


Also, women don't need men because women are beautiful and men aren't and I broke a nail roflmao OMG FEMINISM RULES WOO LOL
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Also, NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, Sammie, I would ban you, but I would have to take this big dick outta my mouth first. And that's not gonna happen, 'cause I love me sum big dick.
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Gobble. Gobble gobble*


*Gobble gobble gobble*


*Pisses in Mort's Beer while he's away*


*Gobble gobble*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Oink oink oink! *rolls in mud and human waste*... *vomits in the mud/waste and starts eating it*...
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Eats ramen*


Why does this taste like beer?


*Eats more ramen*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Cid bursts in, screaming something incomprehensible about selling books and sexual favors for food money*... *smashes head against the stove until he passes out*
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *eats ramen*


Is there porn?
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Only extremely gay horse on horse on squid monster stuff, because that's what I'm into. That and punching old women. *smacks Mother Teresa with a frying pan*
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Laughs while looking up from his brochure on local orphanages*


Yeah, sure, put it in the back next to the rest of the burnables.


*Goes back to laughing at misery*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *gently strokes her beard* And yes, the curtains do match the drapes. *smokes crack and has an abortion*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes this opportunity to somewhat return things to a state of semi-normalcy without all the name changing which will, undoubtedly, confuse anyone reading the previous few comments without knowing what actually happened*
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Normalcy.


Cute Mort, real cute.
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: So was the hooker I killed paid and returned to the streets.
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Isn't that where you got today's meat?
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: No, that was last month's meat... so, yes. It technically is today's meat.
2011-05-28 [Nekko fox]: Now that that's all cleared up.


*starts climbing the burned out hulk that once was a mech robot of some kind*
2011-05-28 [Mystin]: Ok I'm back from the morgue, and since you guys cooked my ribs last time I was here, I'll have a salad! ^_^
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *menacingly fires up the salad drill*
2011-05-28 [Mystin]: *Sets up the music equipment on broken table* I'm going to perform sweet jams tonight people! I'll leave a pity jar for regulars.
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sorry, we don't allow sweet jams here, only bitter jellies. *throws a jar of Bob's Grape and Radish Jelly at the table*
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the Jelly, bitter at the world, curses and shatters*
2011-05-28 [Mystin]: *falls to the ground* You totally hit me!
2011-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his Grape and Radish toast* No I didn't. He did. *points at a mirror*... *some handsome fellow points back at me*...


Hey, jerk! Don't point at me! *punches the mirror, shattering it and causing [nokaredes] to have seven years bad luck, because it was her mirror and that's totally how that works. It goes by ownership, not by who destroyed it! Trust me. I'm a paleontologist.*
2011-05-28 [Mystin]: lol
2011-05-29 [Mystin]: *Starts stripping*
2011-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: MY PAINT!
2011-05-29 [Mystin]: Sorry...
2011-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *falls to his knees and starts sobbing bitterly over the ruined paint job, before coming to his senses and giving a stern, five hour lecture on the matter involving many fine, semi-erotic graphs and charts, like the following*



2011-05-29 [Mystin]: I don't understand the graph!!!
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: Mmm, mutilated hellbeast....
2011-05-29 [Mystin]: If you talking about me, thanks!
2011-05-29 [Mortified Penguin]: UNDERSTAND IT. UNDERSTAND IT. UNDERSTAND IT. *staples the graph to your face*
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: Mort, we're low on staples and graph paper.
2011-05-29 [Mystin]: *raises hand* "Anyone have a staple remover?"
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *Throws some lemons*


LEMONS FOR EVERYONE!


2011-05-29 [Mystin]: "What the hell am I supposed to with this?!"
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: FIND A NEW GOD.
2011-05-29 [Mystin]: Ummm....ok...*juggles lemons with bloody staples in my forehead*
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *Staples new lemons to the stables in your forehead*
2011-05-29 [Mystin]: Ouch....*collapses*
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *Makes lemonades with the stapled lemons*
2011-05-29 Jews: Sells staples and graph paper to Bob's Diner, at ridiculous prices.
2011-05-29 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Well, well, well Mr. [Mortified Penguin], you must've pissed [~Crimson Angel~] off good this time, cause she hasn't commented on this wiki since January 19th.
2011-05-29 [Sideways]: Damn, someone turn on the AC! A huge gust of hot air just blew in here...
2011-05-29 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, you're right, I haven't heard from Misty1 in quite some time. Maybe shes dead out something.


That reminds me- we haven't made fun of her quite some time. Thanks Queen. *clubs a poor defenseless baby seal that in no way would ever resemble Misty1*
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: NOOOOO! THAT WAS THE BABY SEAL THAT IN NO WAY WOULD EVER RESEMBLE MISTY!


*screams his rage into the heaven's at the life of a baby seal that in no way would ever resemble Misty being cut short so early*


*Goes back to making Staple-nade and selling to children, along with a free pamphlet outlining how the government is using fluoridated water and Christmas to control their minds. Many of the children are confused because they can't read, so he starts clubbing the one that in no way would ever resemble Misty using a poor defenseless baby seal that in no way would ever resemble Misty. At the high speeds of the collision of children with seal, they combine in the awesome, super-powered, and all-together gender-neutral BLOB OF CUDGELED MEAT!*


*eats Morts Ramen*


*Promptly spits out string and two rocks that were in the ramen*
2011-05-29 Jews: *pockets string and two rocks, slightly chewed on, for resale at a later time*
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: NOOOOOO! MY INDIGESTIBLE STRING AND TWO ROCKS!
2011-05-29 [Pillowthief]: Quick! The gender neutral blob of cong- Crap. Too late, the Jews already picked it up.
2011-05-29 [Pillowthief]: I need to find a new god. This one isnt making me lemonade.
2011-05-29 God: Thats because you are UNWORTHY.
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: Your MOM was unworthy!
2011-05-29 Satan: Missed me? :D
2011-05-29 [Nekko fox]: Yes.
2011-05-30 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Excuse me Mr. [Pillowthief], but why did you refer to [~Crimson Angel~] as Misty1?
2011-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Why did you refer to Misty1 as [~Crimson Angel~]?
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: Why did you refer to Misty as Amebara when it is common knowledge that Amebara is neither Msity nor Misty1?
2011-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: In any case, who is this Misty/Amebara/Misty1/Walrus fellow anyway? The name(s) don't ring a bell. Because they are names. They do not have hands, so therefore cannot ring bells. I suspect they may have feet though... *points at some mammoth sized hoofprints on [Pillowthief]'s car and [Mystin]'s face*
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: Indeed. Personally, I have no recollection of any wild hambeasts by those names. Of course, I was lobotomized at the age of three for temperament issues, so I can't remember what happened three seconds a- Indeed. Personally, I have no... wait a second...
2011-05-30 [Lord Josmar]: My phone wont let me join! I cant add my name to the list. *Runs from army of little green androids.*
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his little green android*


Yeah, sure thing pal.


*Goes back to blogging about bacon or some other similar activity that involves little green androids. He pauses when the android uses its utility cutting laser to set his hair on fire and trim his eyelashes*


Hm...
2011-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, I see you have the new model.


*glares angrily at his little brown android, circa 2010*


*the little brown android, circa 2010 attempts to use its utility cutting laser, but malfunctions and sets fire to itself and the car I just threw it at*
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: *Meanwhile, Nekko is rocking his flaming hairstyle*


Bitches love third degree burns.
2011-05-30 [Sideways]: You guys should get iPhones. They're still retarded, but the kind of retarded that can walk and form semi-complete sentances. Androids are wheelchair bound, hydroencephalitic, drooling braindead retarded.
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko's android urinates acid on some nearby iPhones that are shaped like customers. He laughs as his eyebrows fall off*


Oh android, look at you go.
2011-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *an angry group of androids look up from their platter of human flesh and money*
2011-05-30 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Well since Pillowthief was making fun of someone he refered to as Misty1 after I was talking about Amebara I assumed he was calling Amebara Misty1.
2011-05-30 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Rubs a couple of her fav buttons over the windows of Bob's Diner..


2011-05-30 [kians mummy]: http://epicroleplayersatelftown.webs.com/
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: That website is going to get DDosd .
2011-05-30 [Pillowthief]: You a quick catch, Queen. Spot on. *clubs a poor defenseless RPG wiki that in no way would ever resemble Misty1/Amebara/Hambeast/Dead person*
2011-05-30 [Nekko fox]: *Eats something that in no way could possibly be related to a defenseless and poorly managed and contrived RPG wiki/Misty1/Amebara/Hambeast/Dead person/Niggers/Batman/Ellipsis*
2011-05-31 [Kitailec]: I was told to stroll through here, so I am!
2011-05-31 [Lord Josmar]: And there is where you made your mistake! To assume we would let you leave MWUAHAHAHA! *grabs body length burlap sack*.
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *Takes the body out of the burlap sack*


Sorry, I usually keep my lunch in there. Please, continue.
2011-05-31 [Lord Josmar]: *Looks at Nekko's lunch longingly* All I ever get is peanut butter and jelly sandwiches!
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *Hefts the well-gnawed Republican*


I can't afford peanut butter.
2011-05-31 [Kitailec]: Oh...well, you're a welcoming crowd. D: I'm scared of the dark so I would like to avoid burlap sacks.
2011-05-31 [Lord Josmar]: *Drops bag in dissapointment* Well your no fun.
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *the power goes out and Nekko swears*


Damn it, generator must have gone out.


*Leaves and returns a few moments later*


Yeah, looks like the zombie we had chained to the turbine wheel finally caught that screaming orphan we had dangling in front of it. I'll go get a spare from the back room. I'll have Mort clean up the mess maybe.


*Meanders off to fetch an orphan from the box out back, knocking several customer's dishes to the floor as he passed before crawling under the counter and falling asleep in a box labeled "In Box" and lined with complaints and notices of foreclosure and eviction, the little green android tucking him in with a sheaf of arrest warrants made out for Mort*
2011-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: MY ARREST WARRANT BLANKET!


*snatches it up and kicks Nekko in the ribs/face/testicles/tenticle/horn-like protrusion jutting out of his side*


Aw, you got jury duty papers and court summons all over it! *shakes it, knocking off the papers, some cockroaches, some vaginaroaches, 14 cobras set aside for Unsafe Mode reboots, and [Mortified Penguin], who was inexplicably on the blanket as well*
2011-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Go sleep in the "Out Box"! *points at a crate full of undelivered letters to Santa, undelivered paychecks to Joe, the paraplegic deaf mute who briefly served as our fry cook/acrobatic janitor, and angry letters to Penthouse for not showing enough horse scat in their Christmas edition*
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: Awww, Mort, do I hafta? Paco sleeps in there sometimes and he makes the thing smell like beans and disappointment.
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *Paco looks up from his solitary dish of beans, eyes forlorn and lost in the haze of his family being dead and working at Bob's Diner*
2011-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: At least he doesn't completely trash it, like our vice part-time assistant bathroom janitor, Melkor, does to the oven when he sleeps in it.


*Melkor briefly looks up from his platter of Silmarils and deep fried elf legs, before going back to marring Arda*


GET BACK TO WORK, DANG IT!!
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *Watches as Melkor grumbles something unintelligible and skewers a nigger....Oop, Nigerian*
2011-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, nice, Melkor. Real nice. That was the last of the Haradrim, dick. Now who will deliver relatively fresh Mumakil meat and fried chicken?! GAH!


*storms into the closet in a fit of rage and slams the door behind him*


*inexplicably walks out of the kitchen, moments later* Sorry. I forgot my keys. *punches an old woman, takes her purse, and runs out the front door/hole*
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *The old woman pulls out nunchuks and starts doing amazing backflips*


STOP THAT!


*The woman meekly sits down and glances around, looking sheepish and awkward*
2011-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: We should really stop handing out nunchucks at the front door.


Well, Reginald, the bouncer/rapist, should really stop handing them out. But I'm not gonna be the one to tell him to stop.


*Reginald looks up from a small child he just choke slammed, before going back to pummeling the suspected would-be criminal, turning him into a won't-be-anything-ever-except-maybe-salad-dressing corpse*
2011-05-31 [Pillowthief]: *the salad dressing looks up from its tears and disappointment, which was ironically on sale today with soup and salad.*
2011-05-31 [Nekko fox]: *The soup looks up at the salad dressing and glances back at the salad with a shrug before continuing its existence as an inanimate object*
2011-05-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *the soup, realizing its pointless existence and inanimate nature, decides to become animated instead*


*it goes on to star in several successful and well known Animes, such as this one here, whatever the hell it is*


  

2011-05-31 [Lord Josmar]: I feel I should be disturbed by all this, but I cant help but giggle like a crazy person when I read all that. Then had to explain what I was giggling about to my boss.


*Nonchalantly pushes full body bag back under chair*
2011-06-01 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Nice picture, strange, but nice.
2011-06-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-06-01 [Lord Josmar]: *Insert witty phrase here*
2011-06-01 [Nekko fox]: *Insert prompt retort full of quirky and thoughtful insight*
2011-06-01 [Lord Josmar]: *Insert brutish come back with faint hints towards one's mother being a street.*
2011-06-01 [Nekko fox]: "Curt rebuttal questioning your sexuality as well as your parentage*
2011-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *violent robbery, followed by a brief shootout*
2011-06-01 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Talk about being fist pounded!
2011-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: N-no. I don't want to.
2011-06-01 [Avaz]: Smut God approves of this image. ^_^
2011-06-01 [Sunrose]: lawl
2011-06-01 [Lord Josmar]: *Violent outburst followed by unfounded promises to leave Elftown for good. Creates anti-[Nekko fox] wiki with not-so-creative title.*
2011-06-01 [Nekko fox]:   



Cool story bro!
2011-06-02 [Lord Josmar]: Imma do some shameless self-promotion real quick, k?
K.
Everyone go to I <3 Rubber Duckies! The giant squeaker in tue sky demands it! Also go to Support Our Council...cause I said?
2011-06-02 [Pillowthief]: *Fist-pounds your mom who, unlike Mort, actually enjoys it* *Joins anti-[Nekko fox] wiki, named "Delete Nekko Fox Now!" and posts several photoshopped pictures of him with a beard which somehow question his sexuality and at the same time supports my reasons for wanting him deleted*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: I support NOTHING! Not even my own body!


*His skeleton crawls out of his skin and leaves his muscles and flesh and organs in a pile to watch out for itself*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: And Pillow is as dumb as a butt.
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *steals the organs for soup/black market related deals*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: Hey, my organs! I need those for organ-related tasks!
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: You can keep the... *rummages through organ sack*


...appendix, asparagus, and one lung. And whatever this is. *pulls out a hissing, purple orb that spits juices on [Pillowthief]'s new shoes*
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *eats purple hissing orb, wipes lips and promptly belches*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: Good, that's just my thermonuclear reactor. It enjoys exploding when it's moody.


*The orb promptly explodes and consumes one tenth of the diner, as well as everything below Infinity's waist*
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *all the hobbits at table seven are wiped out*
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *keeps rummaging through the organ sack*


Organ, organ, organ... piano? *casually tosses it over his shoulder, crushing a family of four behind* Organ, organ, orange, organ, Oregon, organ, orangutan, organ, organ, organic, organdalf, organ... *tosses some stuff into the furnace*
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Shuffles along with just a squidgy slimy torso.* Damn that smarts!


I need somebody to be my legs *Cries hysterically*
2011-06-02 [Sheamus Finn]: *Checks the hobbits for rings and money*
2011-06-02 [ScottJo]: Who needs legs when you have such muscular arms to swing about on......
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: well, I did used to be an orangutan. A boy one who liked to play with my banana's a lot so..I got a lot of exercise.
2011-06-02 [ScottJo]: I can tell, you have such fine ginger hair and ever such long arms
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Indeed. Its all natural babeh..the chocolate is just fake.
2011-06-02 [ScottJo]: Natural gingers are a rare breed...i say be proud, stand tall (minus legs) and say in a proud and happy voice  "i am ginger"
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I'm not ginger man!
2011-06-02 [ScottJo]: No, you're not a Ginger man, you're a Ginger woman (part Orangutan)...be proud!
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: wtf!?


*Pouts*


I am no ginger mingery
2011-06-02 [ScottJo]: Mooo!
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY. GET BACK IN THAT BURGER. *prods [ScottJo] in the face with a taser*
2011-06-02 [Lord Josmar]: *Sits squeaking rubber ducky while watching the legless Ginger Orangutan strut about.*


Hm, its like a Planet of the Apes sequel...
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from a half eaten Charlton Heston*... *becomes enraged for some reason and starts flinging feces and bananas and banana feces*...
2011-06-02 [ScottJo]: [Mortified Penguin] How dare you prod me in such an uncouth fashion! *Fires a dose of lethal methane in the mortified ones general direction* Let that be a lesson to you!
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: With the current seemingly exponential comment rate, Bob's Diner is projected to surpass the 08/09 year in average Comments Per Day, making this, potentially, the third most prosperous friscal year after the 04/05 and 07/08 years, (dis)respectively. Assuming, of course, the currently increased comment rate remains steady and doesn't fall to early 10/11 rates, we should, somewhat easily, be able to produce upwards of 2000 new comments before the end of the friscal year. Quality wise, though, I don't expect much of these comments, but then again, I never have.
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *the methane incinerates both Mort and the graph he was using to illustrate his point/beat Tiny Tim*
2011-06-02 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *sits at a dirty table with a naked hobo lying on top of it* Hmm... What should I order?
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Get away from my table! *shakes a fist*
2011-06-02 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Takes a really long wee on Bob's Diner, after first setting it alight with a lighter and some petrol.*


Damn. It did n't work.. But on the plus side, you can't smell the men's bathroom any more.


Actually, there's not much to smell, or SEE, apart from the charred remains of Nekko Fox, [Mortified Penguin]
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Neat. Not only that, I can't smell anything anymore! At all! I can finally hug my mom without gagging!


*grabs a shovel off the weapon rack and skips off to the cemetery/storage lot, while whistling a jaunty tune*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Is busy whistling and dancing with Mort's mother, various limbs and appendages flying off and reeking of death and rot. It's actually quite romantic*
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: B-but... my mom wasn't dead... at least she wasn't when I buried her all those years ago. She was healthy! She was just fine! She was alive and kicking! ...and screaming... and punching... and gnawing at her casket... but damn it all, I told her I wanted FROSTED FLAKES, NOT CORN FLAKES. She brought this upon herself. Though they're both fine options, if you ask me. Delicious cereals. And they're a part of this complete breakfast! *points at a severed, gangrenous leg, a waffle, and a glass of orange juice*
2011-06-02 [Draugur dauðans]: *Settles on a bench* What a bloody mess. Chaos and Bedlam...I LIKE it.
2011-06-02 [Lord Josmar]: *Holds up white card with the number 6 on it. Begins speaking in snobby British accent.* Not bad Nekko, needs to be a little stronger on the rythem. Your partner, however, is in shambles and was positively stiff the whole dance. *Rimshot in the background*
2011-06-02 [Pillowthief]: MY SHOES! Wait a minute- where the bloody hell are my... WHERE ARE MY SHOES?! *some gnomes look up from their meal*


YOU! I THOUGHT I TOLD YOU TO NEVER COME IN HERE AGAIN! STOP EATING MY SHOES! NO, NO- LEAVE THE SHOES! Crap! They're heading around back- quick get the hose!
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: A SIX? A BLOODY SIX?! You see Carolin, this is why we never make it to the semi-finals!


*Mort's mother rots a little more*


You bitch! It's another man, isn't it!


*Mort's mother drips a couple ounces of fluid on the floor*


Why?! Why can't we just work this out? Grow and love like REAL couples?


*Mort's mother's leg completely detaches itself*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: Well, shit, I knew this would never work out....
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *With a dejected sigh, Nekko drags Mort's mother into the kitchen and throws her into a storage room, half-heartedly adding the quip "It puts the lotion on its skin or it gets the hose again" but he doesn't real FEEL the joke. Must be the cereal*


Well, it's a good thing she grabbed corn fla- WHAT THE SHIT IS THIS?!
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Comes barreling out of the kitchen, holding a box Frosted Flakes*


Mort! Did you tell her to pick up Frosted Flakes? Because I specifically asked for CORN Flakes.


*He throws the box of cereal at a child's face nearby. It crosses his mind that maybe, just maybe, he should be surprised that parent's bring their children to this fine establishment at all. This is, of course, thought an instant before the box of cereal (which is really a brick filled with lead and coated with extra brick for that delicious Bricky-Brick taste!) collides with the child's rib and quite easily smashes and collapses his ribs. The child falls to the ground, frothing bloody slop from his mouth and writhing on the ground*


Aww, isn't that cute?
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *bursts in through the chimney*


Here! I got those ho's you wanted! *the ho's and the gnomes start making out and steal Pillowthief's car/house* Huh. Well, crap.
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Frosted Flakes? I don't even like Frosted Flakes. Apparently, that kid doesn't either. *points at the one eating some Cheerios and not the one writhing on the ground*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: MY CHEERIOS!


*Goes into the back and eats his Cheerios. Then he comes back and procures his Bricky-Brick (Now Available At B's D!) from the flopping child's concave chest and throws it at the child eating cereal. Not the one eating Cheerios, but another child, who takes it in the face like a little girl. Because that is what she is. a Girl. Who looked like she was three.*


What the hell is with all these kids?! What is this, a flippin' daycare?


*A child points at a sign that says "Granny Smith's Daycare and Nursery". An elderly woman, terrified and with her voice quivering asks why they've broken into her daycare and started hurting people*


This isn't Bob's Diner? Well it is now!


*He retrieves his Bricky-Brick (Now with more Strontium 90!) and throws it through the window*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: BRICKY! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Burn, pillage, and rape!! *sets fire to the Daycare and Nursery and throws three kids, a nun, and all the Oreos and milk into a burlap sack* RAH! RAH! RAAH!! KILL THEM ALL! *stabs a kid with the horn on his stylish viking hat*


Nekko, you take it from here. I have a sermon to preach in like thirty minutes. *puts on his priestly robes and molesting gloves*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *stands there awkwardly amongst the raped, pillaged, and burned. He shrugs and walks back to the diner while the Daycare collapses in on itself*
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *gives a passionate sermon, somehow working in a plug for The Unofficial Elftown News*
2011-06-02 [Pillowthief]: *buys a pair of sandals from a traveling camel merchant* Huh. These are actually pretty comfortable. Wonder what they'd feel like with socks... HEY- WHERE THE HELL ARE MY SOCKS?!?
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his bowl of socks*
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY- WHERE THE HELL IS MY BOWL?!?
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his sock filled with bowls*
2011-06-02 [Draugur dauðans]: You shouldn't eat socks. Too much fiber will give you indigestion.
2011-06-02 [Avaz]: And gas.
2011-06-02 [Draugur dauðans]: That too.
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: And that? What about that? *points at nothing in particular*
2011-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from a bowl of nothing in particular which is garnishing with gas and indigestion and serving to the customers after they sign a waiver. Also, he spit chewing tobacco into their salads*
2011-06-02 [Lord Josmar]: *Strokes long, white, ZZ Top like beard that grew while reading the comments since his last one. Looks down in confusion as he pulls out a birds nest from said beard, then goes to the kitchen to make baby bird omelets.*
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY, THAT'S MY BEARD!! *violently rips it off Lord Josmar's face and stuffs it down in my pants, where it belongs*
2011-06-02 [Draugur dauðans]: *Settles back* Too much of that *Points at nothing in particular* May result in a mild case of Necromortis.


So remember kids *Speaking to the corpses of the children by the door* Don't eat too much of Nothing in particular. *Kicks one that started moving.* Damn it, Nekko! I TOLD you not to feed them that!
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: "Necromortis" is just an anagram for "Mort is crone" isn't it?! *smashes [Lord Josmar]'s shins with a golf club*
2011-06-02 [djxmonster]: **comment**
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: That sounds like a threat to me.
2011-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks a bottle over [Lord Josmar]'s head and takes a threatening stance, before growing bored*... *starts rummaging through the corpse pile for interesting and shiny things*...
2011-06-02 [djxmonster]: *sneezes*
2011-06-02 [Lord Josmar]: *Lays in broken painful heap on the floor.*


Hey! There are fries under this table!


*Reaches out and grabs a fry, popping it in his mouth and chewing.*


Nope...fried leeches.


*Continies to eat the fried leeches while bleeding from the head.*
2011-06-02 [Avaz]: "Bleeding from the head" reminded me of headcrabs from the Half-Life games.
2011-06-02 [Lord Josmar]: As crazy as it sounds, I never got into that series...
2011-06-02 [Avaz]: Le gasp! I think perhaps I - or someone else experienced in it - should get to putting one up for reviews.
2011-06-03 [American Revolutionary]: i want an order or two of military intel
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts frying up some launch codes*
2011-06-03 [American Revolutionary]: sounds good...how much will that be?
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: It will be the entire net worth of Facebook.
2011-06-03 [Lord Josmar]: *Takes pictures of fried launch codes to sell to the Russians.*
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You moron! Russians don't like fried foods!


*a group of KGB agents look up from their platter of deep fried turnips*
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Hey, these things happen.
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: And those things?! For the love of God, do those things happen?!! *doesn't point at anything*... *casually goes back to frying launch codes*...
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Only if these things don't happen first.
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: *eats the launch codes*
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: MY LAUNCH CODES!
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *the CIA bursts in, having just learned of their stolen launch codes*


Uh, I mean... HIS LAUNCH CODES! *points at [Mystin]*
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Why was I invited to this? I already come here, which I regret, I hate naked hoboes.
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait, what? You hate naked hobos now?!


Crap. *hides a large, wrapped birthday present in the closet*... *it shakes and screams, but a few hits with a baseball bat shuts it up*...
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *grins* Yep, sorry about that. Well, this place is better than McDonald's.
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *McDonald's looks up from its platter of money, grease, and incompetent workers*


Hey, you! WHY WON'T YOU HIIIIRRE MMMEEEEEE!?!


*McDonald's simply scoffs and goes back to munching on a pimply faced cashier's hopes and dreams on a sesame seed bun*
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Ah yes McDonald's where they serve greasy fatty food while crushing the hopes and dreams of the workers. Here they crush the hopes and dreams of the customers too.
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: And the bones, if they start givin' us any guff. *glances at Tiny Tim*... *he flinches in terror*...
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, you better limp away! *throws his crutch into traffic*
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: There sure is a lot of traffic for... what is this, Africa?


*a big, fat elephant kidnaps a customer with his trunk through the open window, while a bunch of black people throw spears at each other and run around screaming incomprehensibly*


Nope, I guess we're in Alabama! BURN! ...oh, wait, that's where I'm from... crap...
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: *Beats Queen of The Shadows with a wily old hobo who happens to be completely naked and sporting a raging boner*


SPIDER DEMONS ARE IN YOUR EYES! THEY'LL LAY EGGS AND THEY'LL HATCH AND DEVOUR YOUR BRAIN!


*Loses interests and and drops the hobo (named Flinsworth) to the ground. Together, they watch as Feminine Tyrant of Darkness is consumed by spider demons. The other guests move their tables and chairs away and continue eating*
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: You sure we're not in India? They have dark skin and elephants right?
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: As an Indian, I take offense to that.


But as a cowboy, I take a fence to that. *starts building a fence around the Feminine Tyrant of Darkness, but runs out of wood*


*Flinsworth comes walking by* "Oh, hey. I got some wood for you right here." *he smiles and points at his crotch*


Oh, thanks, man. *takes some planks from his fanny pack and continues building the fence*
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Why are you building such a big fence, I'm only 200 lbs, I was 230 lbs but I've been dieting and exercising, still losing weight.
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Wow, nice! You lucky dog.


*pats Chester, the local stray dog, who is chewing on a big bone he found*


"I got a big bone for you right here, Chester." *Flinsworth points at his crotch*... *he pulls a big ham bone from his fanny pack*...
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Where's the ham?
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: "Right here."


*Flinsworth points at his crotch and then whips out a big, floppy, pink piece of meat*... *he proceeds to repeatedly slap [~Queen Of The Shadows~] in the face with it, until its juices start running down her chin*...
2011-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Flinsworth, what the heck, dude?


THAT WAS MY HAM. YOU GOT FACE ALL OVER IT. *grabs the ham and starts picking eyes, eyelashes, and teeth out of it*
2011-06-03 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Hey! I'm a vegetarian!
2011-06-03 [Pillowthief]: Its Ok, I got that covered. *points to his crotch, which is ironically missing its fanny pack* WHERE THE HELL IS MY FANNY PACK?!?
2011-06-03 [American Revolutionary]: he ate my launch codes!!!! *shoots at whever it was that stole the codes* HYAAAAAA
2011-06-03 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Hehe.Fanny. That means something totally different over in the u.k
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: What are codes?
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: What are launch?
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: The square root of rope is "String".
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Halley's comet can be viewed orbiting earth every seventy-six years. For the other seventy-five, it retreats to the heart of the sun, where it hibernates undisturbed
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: In 1948, at the request of a dying boy, baseball legend Babe Ruth ate seventy-five hot dogs, then died of hot dog poisoning.
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: The most poisonous fish in the world is the Orange Ruffy. Everything but its eyes are made of deadly poison. The Ruffy's eyes are composed of a less harmful deadly poison.
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Diamonds are made when coal is put under intense pressure. Diamonds put under intense pressure become foam pellets, commonly used today as packing material.
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Before the Wright Brother's invented the airplane, anyone wanting to fly anywhere was required to eat 200 pounds of helium.
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Also, if you copy this


javascript:var i,s,ss=['http://kathack.com/js/kh.js','http://ajax.googleapis.com/ajax/libs/jquery/1.5.1/jquery.min.js'];for(i=0;i!=ss.length;i++){s=document.createElement('script');s.src=ss[i];document.body.appendChild(s);}void(0);]




And paste it in your url (like elftown, just erase elftown and post the javascript) and click 'Enter'. If you run out of stuff just click pgdn and continue.


Also, niggers.
2011-06-03 [Avaz]: Hi, commentspam.
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: *Commentspam looks up from his bowl of humans. He flips Avaz the bird, not needing a bird near him while he was eating. Besides, he needed to get ready for work. He didn't have time for this nonsense*
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]:   



Because I can.
2011-06-03 [Avaz]: That's actually quite an awesome strip. The last panel reminds me of the airplane scene from Hitchcock's North by Northwest.   
2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: I actually have the schematics and instructional on how to recreate that plane you see (some modifications may be necessary)


  

2011-06-03 [Nekko fox]: Not to scale.
2011-06-03 [American Revolutionary]: uhhhhhh *collapses into a twitching heap*
2011-06-03 [Avaz]: Holyshitthat'sfuckingawesomeIloveit! *needs to breathe* >:D
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his bowl of breath*


Pardon?
2011-06-04 [Mortified Penguin]: MY BREATH!


*falls on the floor and starts flopping around*... *a bunch of children, thinking it's a cool new dance, start flopping as well*...
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: *Starts Godzilla stomping the lot of them*


THIS ISN'T A DANCE FLOOR!


*The DJ looks up from his table full of flyers that read "Dance at B's D"*
2011-06-04 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Oh My GOD! ITS THE CHICKEN DANCE!!
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: *A chicken looks up from its seed. It is, of course, not allowed in the restaurant because they are dirty, poor birds with no education and no wherewithal to not be lazy, mooching birds. It's living on a farm. The fact that it looked up as Infinity screamed what they did was complete coincidence*
2011-06-04 [Avaz]: [Nekko fox], I don't know who you are, but I like you! :D
2011-06-04 [Lord Josmar]: *Seeing the chicken in the restaurant, it of course, not being allowed here, Grabs an axe and chases after. Intent on making a chicken suit.*
2011-06-04 [djxmonster]: OK.. what have I missed?
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: MONSTER!


*shoots DJ in the leg*


Damn, missed...
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: *the monster makes a hasty exit through the cat flap, giving everyone the finger as he leaves*
2011-06-04 [djxmonster]: :(
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: Oop, looks like Djxmonster is hurt. Better put 'em down...


*Loads his shotgun*
2011-06-04 [djxmonster]: noooooooooooooooo
2011-06-04 [Nekko fox]: *Locks and loads*


*Shoots Grandpa Higgins in the face. No one seems to mind because this is outside in the zombie-wranglin' yard*
2011-06-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: You know, if you soak those face chunks in bleach, it'll cover up the gunpowder flavor. 
2011-06-05 [Draugur dauðans]: But I like Gunpowder!
2011-06-05 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Wouldn't freezing the flies automatically kill them?
2011-06-05 [Lord Josmar]: I don't think your freezing the flies, just making them very very cold. Something to do with they way their body works, kinda like how a snake moves slower when it's cold.
2011-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *wrangles a zombie to the floor, before realizing it's actually a bear in a zombie costume*... *gets mauled... erotically*
2011-06-05 [Avaz]: *yells at Mort to pretend he's dead, bears ignore things they think are dead!*
2011-06-05 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: An ode to my hair.


'Dear hair: I recently lost you in a drive by wig incident and now my head feels cold and bare. My fellow friends do naught to help, instead they only laugh and stare. Oh hair, oh timely rug, how I miss thee so, won't you blow back to me, beneath the reeds in the wind doth grow?'
2011-06-05 [Lord Josmar]: *Applauds Infinity's impromptu song about hair. Then notices strange, blowing, hair thing coming in through the window. Promptly shoots it down with shotgun.*


Damn mosquitoes get bigger every year!
2011-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses the woolly bastard into the soup*


We should really close that window... GIT! GIT OUTTA HERE! *throws rocks at a deer trying to climb through the window*... *it gets scared and flies away*
2011-06-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, what was I saying...? Oh, right.


We should really kill the Shinto... *grabs his Japanese gun off the wall*... *starts shooting at some Chinese customers, who, keeping up with my stereotypes, pull out nunchucks and start twirling them and doing amazing flips*
2011-06-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I'll git 'dem darn chinese. Leave it to me, Ma. They like 'dem darn aleen's, they like 'dem noodles, and they y'all illeegal. No, I 'ain't no dumb red-neck, now dat's a stereo type. Uh Huhck.
2011-06-06 [Lord Josmar]: Hey...I represent that stereotype y'all!


*Plays little ditty on banjo before sodomizing some canoe-ers and requesting that they make a squealing sound similar to that of a swine.*
2011-06-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Has anyone seen a bra? I repeat, a red bra? Last I saw, a couple of chipmunks were using it as a swing hammock. Have you seen it? I need it to re-home a couple of mouses, and Ned the Donkey had dibs on it also..too bad Bob used him for lunch today.
'Waiter! There's a donkey's nut hair in this soup. Thats the second time this week. And to think, I used to think that this place was the dog's bo**ocks'-no, wait, THAT'S what I found in my Lasagna last week.
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his bowl of red bras*


Those weren't canoe-ers, they were actually pigs. *points at a group of pigs and one pudgy intern rolling around on the bathroom floor in the mud/soup*
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *the intern, naked and laughing insanely, tackles an elderly gentleman and starts pelting him with pig feces*... *he screams, thumps his chest like a gorilla, and dashes into traffic, getting hit by a truck*


Ha ha! Oh, that crazy Ricky... always with the practical jokes... *chuckles and sips coffee*
2011-06-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Chuckles inanely.*


You enjoying that coffee, are you? Savour it! Do it! Do it now, sir!
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: COFFEE?!?!!?!?! *splashes the hot coffee in Lord Josmar's face and then proceeds to repeatedly punch him in the kidneys*


I don't care for coffee.


*sips the small amount left at the bottom of the cup*
2011-06-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I love a good bit of hot GBH in the morning.




Oh sprout deity
I am forever pious, at your service see?
I worship many, and emulate them all
But god dammit, god. I'm still waiting for your sodding call.
And my mansion, allah, gone up in flames. So, sprout, I'm 'gonna give you my all.
And people call me insane? I just haven't backed the right nag yet, that's all.


Now spit that coffee at Lord Josmar. Do eet b*tch, do it!i
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *spits tea at Lord Bellington*


"I say!"
2011-06-06 [Lord Josmar]: *Steps out from behind Josmar look alike sponge manikan!*


Aha! You fell for the oldest trick in the book! The putting a sponge manikan look alike infront of you at the last second to absorb splashed coffee for later consumption! And it only cost me my ability to spell manikin...manican...manycan...damn
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Curse you and your manicure! *kicks a seagull*
2011-06-06 [Nekko fox]: *Badgers the seagull with a badger*
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: MY BADGER!
2011-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Speak to me, Steven! SPEAK TO MMMEEEEE!!


*cough cough* "I... I can't. I'm a badger."


NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!! *dramatically falls to the floor, landing on Steven and crushing him*
2011-06-06 [Araglas]: *walks in holding a box of dead turtles* Did we order these?
2011-06-06 [Lord Josmar]: Oooh! My coasters!


*Runs over and grabs box of dead turtles and begins setting them on the tables before violently instructing the patrons to place their cups on them or "I'll punch water rings into your kidneys."*
2011-06-06 [Nekko fox]: *the customer's, most of which are too shell-shocked to care, stare blankly at their feet.*


WATER-RING KIDNEY PUNCH!


*Punches Mort in the badger*
2011-06-06 [Flisky]: *pushes turtle to the side and continues reading the same newspaper she was reading all those many days ago* Damned turtles.
2011-06-06 [Lazy lion]: *punches mortified peguin in the face!*
2011-06-06 [Nekko fox]: *Punches the punch in the punch*
2011-06-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Belches loudly*


2011-06-06 [Pillowthief]: *punches Bender in the FACE!*
2011-06-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You b@star*! That's my husband you are bashing on, you bot basher you.


*Chases[Pillowthief]with a spatula*
2011-06-06 @Not logged in user@: *Lazy lions stabs everyone with a knife*
2011-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper*


*notices a gaping hole in his chest that's hemorrhaging blood, punch, and badgers*


*shrugs and goes back to the newspaper*
2011-06-07 [Lazy lion]: *steals morts newspaper* take that!!!
2011-06-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes out of the hole as well on a float* Wheee! *crawls back in*
2011-06-07 [Lazy lion]: *hunts the turkey*
2011-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: MY HOLE!


MY NEWSPAPER!!


*sobs in the corner, while rocking back and forth*
2011-06-07 [Lazy lion]: Yes yes very good >:)
2011-06-07 [Lord Josmar]: *Attempts to choose which sexual innuendo to use in response to Mort. The sheer number of choices causes head to explode....the one on the neck.*
2011-06-07 [Lazy lion]: *dives behind a random table* Anymore explosion?
2011-06-07 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Not yet. *slaps Lord Josmar in the face with a giant pink rubber dildo* Come on! Wake up damn it!
2011-06-07 [Lord Josmar]: NO! Stop Uncle Eddie! I don't wanna play dildo slaps anymore!


*The newly reformed head screamed before snapping out of the horrible Christmas flashback.*
2011-06-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You are all a bunch of douche-bags. Now shut up and fetch me stuff.
2011-06-07 [Sheamus Finn]: Here's a grenade! *Pulls pin and tosses to Infinity*
2011-06-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Cheers!*Catches grenade in mouth, swallows and lets out an almighty belch.* Damn. That gave me heartburn.
2011-06-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Breaks wind (A scorching stream of fire shoots out from [9jlriexqk,ktpk]'s butt, searing all diners medium-rare)* Here's your order Bob, enjoy, ready grilled mmmm!
2011-06-07 [American Revolutionary]: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH MYYYYY EYYEEESSSS!!!!!!!!
2011-06-07 [Flisky]: *is glad she doesn't actually dine here*
2011-06-07 [American Revolutionary]: *collapses*
2011-06-07 [Nekko fox]: *Falls to his knees over [American Revolutionary], landing on them and inadvertently crushing them*


NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!
2011-06-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Laughs triumphantly at[Nekko fox]* My work here is almost done. *Almost*. But not quite..I sill have more havoc to wreak, and farts to expel.
2011-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Good Heavens! So unrefined! *shakes head disapprovingly and gently sips tea from fine china, which is much better for tea sipping than unsatisfactory korea*


*genteelly partakes in the snorting of cocaine from a prostitute's naval, before elegantly punching her in the face and eating her hair*
2011-06-07 [Avaz]: *idly wonders which bodily hemisphere the hair is located...*
2011-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The toes, of course. That's were the sweetest hair is located.
2011-06-07 [Avaz]: Of course!
2011-06-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Duh, it's growing out of the toe jam
2011-06-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Ahhh..just what I need to spread on my toast. Wait-whats this? *Spits out a toenail* Wtf!? BOB!!
2011-06-08 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *chuckles as I hide a jar behind my back labeled Orphan toe nail jam*
2011-06-08 [djxmonster]: *Stumbles in drunk*
2011-06-08 [Nekko fox]: Hey, has anyone seen my Orphan Toe-Nail Jam?
2011-06-08 [Pillowthief]: No. But I did find some Orphan Tears©...
2011-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: And a vial of Orphan Soul Essence©Disney 2011? Have you seen any of th- MY BIKE! *points at an old woman reaching for some salt*


Release the bike, erotic temptress! *she looks around quizzically and goes back to reaching for the salt* Oh, so we're gonna do this the hard way... *slowly unsheathes his Sword of Pain and Despair©Disney 2011*
2011-06-08 [Pillowthief]: *uses the butt of his Unleasher of Pain AR©Sea World 2010 to smash in the back of the old women's skull* Haha- stole your kill. PWND.


*impossibly whips around and shoots Nok in the head just at the split second she clears a corner* HAXZORS BIOTCHES! *continues a string of vulgar insults directed over XboxLive, to no one in particular*
2011-06-08 [American Revolutionary]: *smashes pillows xbox*
2011-06-08 [Flisky]: *looks up, sees smashed xbob, shrugs, goes back to paper*
2011-06-08 [kians mummy]: http://www.disastercountdown.com/event/mayan/
2011-06-08 [Lord Josmar]: *Smashes Mayan calender with Aztec weaponry.*


Take that stupid foreigners!


*Moves on to whacking gullible people who believe stupid stuff people tell them.*
2011-06-08 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Hahaa @ [Lord Josmar].


EXACTLY.


Only dozy people who don't have a brain/don't know their research think that the world will end *EXACTLY* on that date, 2012, 12th just before my lunch break ;)
2011-06-08 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Well just remember in Japan it's already tomorrow.
2011-06-08 [Avaz]: They live IN THE FUTURE!! :O
2011-06-08 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Indeed they do, why do you think all of our cool games and gaming systems come from them?
2011-06-08 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Aye. Good point.


I am from the future myself. Well, half a lung and a kidney. But that technically qualifies for future organs.
2011-06-08 [Lazy lion]: Does Anyone want some ramen noodle???
2011-06-08 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I have some with shrimp in it so I'm good.
2011-06-08 [Avaz]: Mort always wants ramen. Mort can be seen eating ramen at all hours of the day, seven days a week.
2011-06-08 [American Revolutionary]: *laughs crazily and beats josmar with a loaf of french bread, shouing random russian cusswords*
2011-06-08 [Lord Josmar]: *Threatens to invade the French bread, who then quickly surrenders and runs away.*


Haha. Silly carbs.
2011-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *Looks up from a bowl of Rice Kruspies©Satan 2004*


I don't much care for ramen. *goes back to eating the cereal* Oh, wow! A prize in the bag! *pulls out a rat carcass*
2011-06-08 [Lazy lion]: The rat goes with ramen! *puts the rat cacass in some chicken ramen*
2011-06-09 [Avaz]: Huh. Then who am I confusing you for?
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: That [Mortified Penguin] guy, most likely. He's a real jerk though.
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! No, YOU'RE a jerk!
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll jerk YOU!
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... what?
2011-06-09 [Lazy lion]: I'm worried about mort......
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh... *leaps out a 436 ft. high window*
2011-06-09 [Lazy lion]: do a head dive!!!!!!!!!
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: That is very rude, jerking people off like that. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Yeah, unless you're in a special room and they enjoy it. ;-)
2011-06-09 [Avaz]: Did you just defenestrate yourself, Mort? Tsk tsk.
2011-06-09 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Yeah, you have to go to another room for those sort of shenanigans. Here at Bob's we like to maintain a family atmosphere
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *looks down, defeated in the josmar-carb war*
noooooooooo this cannot be
2011-06-09 [Paul Doyle]: If anyone has any stupid/silly questions that cannot be answered here, please direct them to the empty suit who's always locked up in the back room counting beans or beating his meat instead of interacting with the employees and customers as he ought. But if he's still not available, maybe direct them to Ask Pauly the Anthro-Dragon! instead. For real-life advice, don't you be getting delusional and looking for it on Elftown (unless of course you really don't have a life)! :3
2011-06-09 [Pillowthief]: *Opens the back room door slowly* What what? Did someone say my name? No? Must be the squirrels again. *goes back to counting his beans or beating his meat instead of interacting with the employees and customers as he ought*
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: 'a family atmosphere'.. yeah, Bob sure knows how to do that. *Pulls a child's calf bone from out of her soup*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *loads a small catapault and pelts infinity in the forehead wit a radioactive jumping bean from the third generation of unknown crypt robbers who were dancin he charleston and singing yankee doodleand drinking home made whisky in france*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: France eh? I knew those people were weird, but they finally proved it when they made that Hot Doll thing, it's a sex toy for dogs.
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: do not make me get my mexican dog named vladimir after you from the belgian military
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Are you talking to me? *curious look*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: maybe..*chuckles* im joking....i dont have a mexican dog i do have a hungarian dancing burrito
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: COOL! I WANT TO SEE!
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: lol *pulls out a box and a burrito cmes dancing out to the hungarian waltz*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: OH! I WANT TO DANCE WITH THE BURRITO!
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: go ahead
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *does the tango with the dancing burrito*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *watches and laughs* his names pepito
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: You're a lovely dancer Pepito.
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: pepito: *comunicates by tapping feet*
2011-06-09 [Lord Josmar]: Ah, damn roaches carrying away the food again.


*Swats Pepito the hungarian, dancing, mexican food.*


King of the Jungle my ass.
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: my dancing burrito
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *huggles the burrito* DON'T HURT HIM!
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *smiles*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *sniffs the burrito* Is he a vegetarian burrito, or does he contain meat?
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: hes a beef burrito
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: UGH! I'm a vegetarian! *stomach growls*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: i have his sister katrita too *shedances out to the salsa*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Is she made of meat?
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: nope
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Can I eat her?
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: sure...
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: YAY! *eats Pepito's burrito sister*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *pepito freaks out and starts running in circles*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *gives Pepito a new sister*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *they dance*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *giggles* That's so adorable, I'm still hungry. *munches on Yan Yan*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *lobs a grenade between pepito and his sister and it goes off, burrito goin all over the place* hahahahhahahahah
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Oh my! Burrito murder! Want some of my Yan Yans?
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: sure *takes couple yan yan*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I love Yan Yan! It's kind of like Pocky except the sticks are bigger and you get more frosting. :-)
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: indeed =]
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *spots a naked hobo* UGH! PUT SOME CLOTHES ON YOU DAMN HOBO!
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *looks away* ewwwwwwwwwww
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *takes the Hobo in the back and throws an apron over him*
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *is traumatized by the naked hobo and pulls pin on grnade and holds it*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: What are you doing? *smacks the grenade and causes the hobo to blow up* Oops!
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: mm..naked hobnob-I mean-hobo?
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: *Takes the pin and uses it to floss his teeth. And the teeth of a screaming gentleman who looks more bewildered than terrified*


"I say!"
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *is freaking out*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Why are you freaking out?
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: soooo ugly *jumps out the window*
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *pulls you back in* What do you think you're doing?! You can't fly!
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: i can try to
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Ok, go for it then... If you want.
2011-06-09 [American Revolutionary]: *laughs* im not that crazy
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Good.
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: So he can. I saw him the other day.
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Oh?
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Yes, through my third eye.
2011-06-09 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Right, third eye...
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: Enough nonsense. We must test this. FOR SCIENCE!


*Throws [American Revolutionary] bodily out of the window. He watches as they slam into the gravel and skid to a halt*


Hm...maybe I shouldn't have filled his clothing with lead. but now it's too late to turn back! The experiment must go on!


*He throws [~Queen Of The Shadows~] after the sniper, opting to go with a lighter material this time around, like brick, or sheet steel*
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I'm next
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, we do need a control for this experiment...
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *Pedro arrives with a wide variety of controllers on a platter, from N64, to PS3 to XBOX360 and even an SNES controller*


Pedro, you stupid sumbitch! *smacks him around with a piece of sheet metal*
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I hav egs
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: *throws [9jlriexqk,ktpk] out into the gravel pile*


That's for terribly spelling that message!
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: so sume u emiserbale git!
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: *throws a bucket of gravel onto Infinity*


English you wretched hive of parasites wrapped in flesh!
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Sigh*
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: It is true. my moronic upbringing, and lack of a university degree renders me somewhat stupid when faced with such sheer brilliance, that is you, Sir Nekko..
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: MY GRAVEL!!


*starts picking up all the rocks and putting them back in the bucket*... *accidentally picks up some non-gravel* EWW, COBBLE!! *hurls it angrily into traffic, causing hilarious explosions*
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: also..could be the fact that I sobered up, and that I did have an intelligent upbringing, AND a university degree..who knows, Sir Nekko, who knows..
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Thows nuclear infused gravel back at Nekko*, whom [9jlriexqk,ktpk] decides to be somewhat weary of in future.


There is an eerie glow round yonder Nekko's aura-don't you agree?
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: MY UNIVERSITY DEGREE!!


*snatches [9jlriexqk,ktpk]'s degree and writes "Mortified Penguin" on it, with several backward letters, a number or two, and even a weird Arabic symbol*
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: MY NUCLEAR INFUSED GR-


Ah, screw this... *goes back to reading his daily porno behind the counter*
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Wth* Thats my picture in there! What you reading-Beastuality Bi-Annual? Knew I should have got those negatives.
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his nuclear infused gravel that he was using to power his reactors*


Buh?
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... uh huh... deliveries go around back in th- PAPER CUT!!!


*starts flailing his arms around, running in circles, and screaming*... *gets a flamethrower off the wall and, in a fit of drunken rage, starts torching customers*... *Joe, a recent father of healthy, baby twins, decides to stop by Bob's Diner for the first time and get a snack and maybe pick up a salad for his loving wife*... *he opens his wallet to make sure he has enough money and notices a picture of himself and his wife, holding their newborn twins*... *with a smile on his face, Joe opens the door and steps inside*... *days later, at Bob's Happy Fun Time Morgue and Party Shop, Joe's wife can barely recognize the charred mass of flesh that was once her husband*... *all is well though, because she was planning on divorcing him anyway*...
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: wtf.


Bob runs the sick puppeh farm.


Because as we all know, Bob's Diner really is the dog's B*llocks.
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, we need bee asterisk llocks in order to keep it all going well and smooth.


Also, it keeps our ham at the healthy, sanitary temperature of seventy-eight degrees. On the floor.
2011-06-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: Ay, yo. I gots an order of 2,000 bee asterisk llocks here. Where you want 'em?
2011-06-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Points to butt^
2011-06-09 [Pillowthief]: *looks up from his Orphan Tears* Why are you pointing at my... *looks at blank faces around the room* Oh NO YOU DONT! Deliveries go around back!
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: *snickers*


Hee hee, rectal insertion joke.
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts lubing up the boxes*
2011-06-09 [Nekko fox]: *Starts lubing up the lube*
2011-06-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts boxing up the lube*
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: *starts delivering the lubed boxes of lubed lube boxed lube to the rear*
2011-06-10 [Lord Josmar]: ...You lost me.
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: *Loses Lord Josmar because they aren't a licensed lubed box of lubed lube boxed lube luber*
2011-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *finds Lord Josmar and tosses him into the incinerator with all the other unlicensed boxes, lubes, boxed lubes, lubed lubes, boxed boxes, lubed boxers, boxer lube, boxed boxers, lubed boxer boxes, boxed lubed boxer boxes, and lubed boxes*
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: *throws the incinerator into a lake, and then dumps the lake into a river, and the hurls the river into a canyon*
2011-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *Sylmestor Styrone, an unlicensed, lubed boxer climbs out of his box of lube and starts lubing some boxes with the lube from his lubed box*... *"Yo, I'mma lube des boxes, yo!" he says in a typical New Jersey accent, before being thrown into the incinerator in the lake in the river in the canyon, effectively ending his unlicensed and unsuccessful movie career*
2011-06-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Love the alliteration
2011-06-10 [Lord Josmar]: *Sits in the incinerator, in the lake, in the river, in the canyon and twiddles his thumbs.*


"Well, at least there is lots of lube...just in case."
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: Quiet in the lake canyon river incinerator! No talking while you wait out your eternity of solitude.
2011-06-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Wees in the lake*
2011-06-10 [Lord Josmar]: *Sees leaking water turn yellow.*


Ooo, lemonaide!
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: *Finishes mixing the lemonade/urine/cyanide/bog water*


come and get it.
2011-06-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Heeeey. I hope those are raisins floating in there. My god. You people are plain animals.
2011-06-10 [Lord Josmar]: *Appears next to Nekko.*


Me, me, me, me, me.
2011-06-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Rolls down the yellow wee slide in a radioactive barrel. So radiative, it turns her hair green* Yee-haa! Who wants to come with me? Fiver a go.
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: *Pours out the lemonade bog water*


Yeah, I don't care anymore.
2011-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *the lemonade bog water starts dissolving a hole in the floor, but, realizing there was already a hole there, it stops and simply falls on through*
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: Just like Uncle hobo used to molest.
2011-06-10 [American Revolutionary]: *plays with a pair of lubed boxer lubed boxes lube* so squishy
2011-06-10 [Pillowthief]: *a lemonade/urine/cyanide alligator jumps out of the bog water and chews on Scout Snipers head!* *Scout Sniper loses 14 hp*
2011-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *the gator, poisoned by the tainted scalp, loses 54 hp and somehow levels down*
2011-06-10 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *swings a mace around*
2011-06-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mace, annoyed by your shenanigans, pulls out his lightsaber and slices off your arm*... *he then starts complaining, using many expletives, about there being too many snakes in the soup*... *then he asks a snake if he looks like a bitch*...
2011-06-10 [Nekko fox]: *the snake inclines its head in acknowledgement of Mace being a bitch before slithering over to lay in the soup*


*the soup is disgusted with itself and everyone in the room and detonates itself*


*the detonation, being a quiet, humble explosion, takes out only Mort's knee cap and Sniper's big toe*


*everything else is too beautiful and majestic to be bothered with, lazy, good-for-nothing beauty and majesty*
2011-06-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Turns gay and then straight again*
That was some weekend..
2011-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *scratches knee hole*
2011-06-11 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: If the weekend made you gay it was. lol
2011-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: It probably wasn't the weekend so much as it was the hot, sweaty, exotic, gyrating, male strippers, thrusting their throbbing, bulged g-strings two inches from his face. Then again, it may have just been the weekend. I've seen some sexy weekends.


*scratches his g-string*... *some loose dollar bills fall out*...
2011-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, wait. We're talking about [9jlriexqk,ktpk]. A girl.


My mind must have been... elsewhere... *starts dancing to rave music*
2011-06-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: But on the weekend's I'm Bob.
2011-06-11 [Nekko fox]: Bob can be a girl's name. Don't argue.


*Slaps a child that raises its hand and opens its mouth. It starts sobbing about just needing to use the restroom*


Restrooms are for customers only.


*Slaps the parent who was opening their mouth, presumably the one who owns the child.*


No refunds!


*the parent starts sobbing about just needing to use the bathroom as well*
2011-06-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Haha.


Theres a lot of slapping going around. I like that.


You slapper, you!
2011-06-11 [Nekko fox]: *Slaps [9jlriexqk,ktpk]*


THANK YOU! I appreciate the feedback!


*Someone raises a hand. He slaps an elderly woman wearing a monocle*


"I say!"


*He slaps her again*


No monocles!
2011-06-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Eats a monocle sandwich*.
2011-06-11 [Nekko fox]: *slaps the monocle sandwich*


Quit being so predisposed to being consumed!
2011-06-11 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *laughs and slaps Nekko with smoked salmon*
2011-06-11 [Lord Josmar]: *Slaps Queen with salmoned smoke*


No nicotene covered fish allowed!
2011-06-11 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: It's not a smoker.
2011-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in, smoking a sturgeon*


*an amputee presumably tries to raise his hand, but doesn't*


*slaps him so hard, he falls out of his wheelchair and starts crying like a little girl. Which he actually is.*


No wheelchairs! They really scuff up the hardwood floor. *points at some shag carpet*
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Did someone say shag?
2011-06-12 [Lord Josmar]: Did somebody say amputee?
2011-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *a burnt out hippie and his inbred dog with a speech impediment look up from their beanbag chairs*


"Like, yeah, man! I said it!"


Hey! HEY! I hired you freakin' druggies to solve that murder case TWO WEEKS AGO!


*they just giggle*
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Takes out wand and taps everybody three times.* Chango Sproutus!


I'm not Harry Potter, I'm just an obsessive compulsive.
2011-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes out wand and shouts loud, angry gibberish*... *the wand goes off and kills some guy that doesn't matter*...


*puts his wand back in his gun holster, making sure to put the safety on first*
2011-06-12 [Lord Josmar]: *Shanks hippie and dog nonchalantly*


We really need to find this murderer.


*Shanks unsuspecting midget grandma.*
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: What is 'shanks'?
2011-06-12 [Sheamus Finn]: Prison term, the act of shanking,use of a sharpened toothbrush or something sharp. Thank you Urban Dictionary. *Shanks english professor*
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]:
Hmm


*Shanks [Sheamus Finn]*


Did I do it right?
2011-06-12 [Sheamus Finn]: No, lower and more in the center....
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Pokes eye*


Did I get it this time?
2011-06-12 [Sheamus Finn]: Nope. Still in the back *Shanks Infinity Hypothosis* Right there....see.
2011-06-12 [Lord Josmar]: No, you forgot to use the shank entirely that time.


*Shanks Infinity's eye*


See, that's how you do it.
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]:
*Third eye opens, and a great red lazer beam comes shooting out and incinerates both shankers.*


THAT's how you do it.
2011-06-12 [Lord Josmar]: Thats cheating!


*So says the Josmar shaped ash pile*
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Gets out the vacuum and starts hoovering.* You suck.
2011-06-12 [Pillowthief]: Haha Ha hahaHA ah ha. You use a funny pun. *chokes om piece of impossible thick glasses* Excuse me! Waiter! There is detective in my soup!
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: So thats where Harry went..Bob, you little sod. The other white meat huh? Be thankful its not his *ahem* wand.


I swiped that earlier, for my weekends when I am Bob.
2011-06-12 [Paul Doyle]: support the guards --- the real page :P
2011-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: We here at Bob's Diner don't support no filthy guards! *a group of guards look up from their platter of wikis and privs*
2011-06-12 [Paul Doyle]: What about the Gourds ?
2011-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: They're alright, as long as they stay in the garden and refrain from stealing my car, like those damn peaches.
2011-06-12 [Lord Josmar]: *Peaches look up from the cobbler, realizing they've been busted. They quickly run out to said stolen car, peeling out of the parking lot*
2011-06-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *picks up the peach peelings that landed outside of the parking lot*


NNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!


Wait! A thought occurs to me. I don't have a car. I drive a tractor and I park it in the kitchen every morning. And the tag on that car said P1LOWTHF.
2011-06-12 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Crazy Shit!
2011-06-12 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from the pot of soup he had filled with boots for tonight dinner special*


What? Tractor in the kitchen? At B'S D? I thought we had standards!


*Notices that stove top he was boiling boots on was in fact the displaced radiator of a tractor*


Oh... Well, that explains why there were wheels and crushed rabbits on the stove...
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: My mother used to tell me that if I swallowed an apple seed/orange seed I would grow a big tree in my stomach.


At last! A solution to end world hunger. Grow-in-yer-belly-food. Cut out the middle man.
2011-06-12 [Lord Josmar]: That's so bogus!


*Plucks orange from belly-button tree*
2011-06-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Be thankful the tale is from the belly button..
2011-06-12 [Avaz]: I once applied to be a poker for outie belly-button trees. Unfortunately, I was rejected. :(
2011-06-13 [Pillowthief]: Thats a pity. I myself was accepted on behalf of my extensive- Wait. MY SOUP!


Oh, actually my soup is right here. What am I missing? Good thing I live here, that way I have all the time in the world to figure it out.
2011-06-13 [Pillowthief]: Wheres the peaches I was eating?!
2011-06-13 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *shoves a bowl of peaches in Pillowthief's face*
2011-06-13 [Mortified Penguin]: MY BOWL MADE OF PEACHES!


It may not be good for holding liquids or any type of small solid, but... it's... well, crap... I guess it's not really good for anything... *starts constructing a bowl made of apples instead*
2011-06-13 [Pillowthief]: *Spits out a scrap of ascot* Sir! There's detective in my peaches bowl!
2011-06-13 [Nekko fox]: *The detective clambers out of the bowl and waddles off*
2011-06-13 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *shoots the detective in the leg with a tazar gun* DON'T LEAVE WITHOUT PAYING!
2011-06-13 [Lord Josmar]: *Sneakily removes tazed detective's from his back pocket and takes all the money out. Throws a five on the counter.*


There we go.


*Stuff the rest of the money into my pocket.*
2011-06-13 [Nekko fox]: *The detective files lawsuits against [~Queen Of The Shadows~] for unlawful use of a defensive weapon, assault, battery, and malicious mischief. He follows that up with a lawsuit against [Lord Josmar] for theft. He wins both lawsuits and leaves them living in a gutter. He also pees in the soup at B's D. Nobody seems to notice a difference in flavor*


*Nekko shoots the detective in the head from behind and dumps the corpse in the soup. It fizzles slightly as it is stirred into the broth, and when he has finally melted away Nekko steals the tip jar*


*sits in the back room, eating the change and bills*


Mmm, rich food.
2011-06-13 [Lord Josmar]: *Sits in gutter smiling*


And momma say I'd never live in no nice, fancy place as dis!
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *the streetsweeper operator cheerfully agree with [Lord Josmar] before sweeping them up with the detritus*


"And your momma and I are proud of your newfound independence too!"
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *a homely, homeless, homosexual hooker looks up from her lesbian orgy*


*"We shore is! Yer father and I ain't not no never ain't been no prouder!" she slurs incomprehensibly, spitting out a tooth and a wad of tobacco while she speaks*... *she removes her patched up overalls and returns to her orgy in the sewage pool, as it is now her turn to take big Bertha's pounding rod*...
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *"You ready, ma'?!" hollers big Bertha, preparing to insert the Pounding Rod©PBS 2007*
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *Suddenly, the streetsweeper collides with the lot of them, bursts into flame and is torn asunder by its own violence. There are no survivors*
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper to see an inexplicably flaming streetsweeper and several hillbilly corpses piled in Bob's Diner's fancy new dining hall (now with tables!)*


Yeah, deliveries go around back. *the flaming wreckage/corpse pile hoists itself up onto what could only be called its legs and limps around back, to deliver some crates it somehow obtained*
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *The crates in turn burst into flame, screaming their horrible plight to the heavens and at several nearby children who are eating today's soup. They start crying, but soon they all melt because the soup had dead detective in it. And concentrated hydrochloric acid*
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts up a "Warning: Wet Floor" sign beside the melted children and returns to his hardcore, pornographic, implicitly illicit newspaper*


Man, the Weekly Post has really gotten good lately. *circles an ad inquiring about a place to store corpses*
2011-06-14 [American Revolutionary]: *comes in wavinga soviet flag singing "hail o russia"
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh oh, one of the interns has gotten loose. *fires a harpoon at [American Revolutionary]*


Wait, we were keeping them prisoner, right? *shrugs and fires another harpoon that takes down a large seagull, which screeches and lands in some British foreign dignitary's soup*


"I say!"
2011-06-14 [Pillowthief]: Knew we should have gone with the Ukrainian interns instead of these old USSR rejects. *goes back to the cyro chamber, conveniently located between the zombie pit and the computer snake pit, and starts thawing out some quasi-russian interns*
2011-06-14 [Pillowthief]: Hey! Heres my shoe! Damn thing has freezer burn on it.
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *weaves his way through the fireswamp, leaps over the snow sand, and fights off the ROUSes, before finally making it to the massive underground cryo-chamber*... *opens one of the large storage freezers and pulls out a Hungry-Man dinner*... *sprays some deodorant in the various pits and returns to the surface world with fresh, new battle scars and awesome tales of the adventures below*... *microwaves the Hungry-Man, but realizes it expired back in '08*... *throws it away and eats ramen instead*...
2011-06-14 [American Revolutionary]: *the harpoon misses* HAIL THE SOVIET UNION!!!!!
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *Walks up and shoots Sniper in the foot with a harpoon, nailing them to the floor*


There, that'll keep you from running off and joining the circus!


*the circus moves in to Bob's Diner to accommodate Sniper's unfortunate situation*


Damn it.


*Elephant droppings are everywhere. The British foreign dignitary cheers up noticeably*


"Just like jolly old England's national cuisine! Tasteless crap, everywhere!"
2011-06-14 [Avaz]: *throws hail on the Soviet Union*
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *The Soviet Union looks up from its vodka and borscht, looking quite concerned*


"By jove, is that hail?"
2011-06-14 [Avaz]: *Hail declares* "It's certainly not sleet!"
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *the sleet looks up from his slush, sniffling*


"Nobody care for sleet..."


*Nekko backhands sleet and kicks him down the stairs*


That's for making people miserable!
2011-06-14 [American Revolutionary]: *tries pulling harpoon out of foot* dammit!!!! son of a *gets shit on by an elephant* ewwwwwwwwwwwww
2011-06-14 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *has had to start over by getting two jobs one at Wal Mart and one at bob's Diner as a waitress*
2011-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, what?! Who said you could be our waitress?! We have a perfectly fine one right over there! *points at a skeleton in some British guy's soup*


"I say!"


But yeah, everybody hates sleet. He's a dick. *opens the door for snow, but he gives me the cold shoulder*... *warms his shoulder in the incinerator*...
2011-06-14 [Paul Doyle]: Hell, since we're talking about the wonderful CCCP, I propose Natasha be the waitress (though she might want to update and minimize her dress---as long as she isn't Mother Russia, the average Russian woman has good reason to flaunt her physical looks), while that Boris guy secretly records all the conversations in the diner in a drippy dim back room. I don't know what Rocky and Bullwinkle would do, though.
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *Backhands Paul Doyle and then kicks them down the stairs to join the mangled lump that was Sleet*


No one care about Mother Russia anymore.


*Pockets his photo of Mother Russia winking, the words "thanks for a wonderful evening" written in lipstick*
2011-06-14 [Paul Doyle]: *in a daze, bird-dogs on Natasha, and uses fiery breath to melt Boris's door shut* *farts hard in Nekko's general direction*
2011-06-14 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *leaves for my shift at Wally World (A.K.A. Wal Mart)
2011-06-14 [Nekko fox]: *Is too far away and fondling his picture to care. However, several nearby candles ignite Paul's flatulence and burns their colon*
2011-06-14 [Paul Doyle]: I'm duplicate? How can this be? Curious. . .


*gives Natasha a passionate open-mouth kiss after she gives a good massage---Boris wasn't much of a lover, apparently*
2011-06-15 [Nekko fox]: *No one believes in Paul's Mary Sue wet-dream fantasy, but everyone notices their inability to cope with the idiosyncrasies of the English language*
2011-06-15 [Lord Josmar]: *Brain melts at the readying attempt of the multi-syllable word.*


I don't understand fancy talk!
2011-06-15 [American Revolutionary]: *digs self out of the elphant poo and shouts* RUSSIA IS CALLING HAIL THE SOVIET EMPIRE!!!
2011-06-15 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: HAIL!
2011-06-15 [Nekko fox]:   
 
                                                                              Hail ---^
2011-06-16 [Lord Josmar]: Hale? Isnt that a healing spell?
2011-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Snowman eggs!
2011-06-16 [perfumed ignition]: Snowmen lay eggs? lol
2011-06-16 [Lord Josmar]: Those are awful! Tried frying some one time and they turned into water...
2011-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course. They are cold-blooded after all.
2011-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I tried frying some up one time, but when I came back they were gone! I blamed Tiny Tim for the thievery and savagely beat him with bust of Jesus, who, might I add, cracked under pressure. So did Tim. It was just his spine though, nothing important.
2011-06-16 [Nekko fox]: *Tiny Tim drags his useless legs behind as he pulls himself towards the phone in an attempt to call the police. Unbeknownst to Tiny Tim, someone replaced the entire phone with a pound of C4 explosives and nails. It detonates and shreds everything above Tiny Tim's pelvis. Nekko hops out from behind the counter*


APRIL FOOLS BITCH!


*He pulls some nails out of his face and sells them to some newcomers to the Diner of Bob (Shrine of the fallen Tiny Tim) as fake cures for cancer*
2011-06-16 [Lord Josmar]: *Buys some of Nekko's nails and starts a Texas Acupuncture clinic.*
2011-06-16 [Nekko fox]: Want some hammers to go with each of your nails? Covered in 100% authentic Tiny Tim gore, meaning they have all the healing powers of hammers!


*pours chicken blood on some rusty ball peen hammers before demonstrating for some gawking rubes who gaze in wonder as he shows how the hammer can cure insomnia with a simple, high-velocity collision with an unwilling participant's temple*
2011-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-06-16 [American Revolutionary]: *goes into spazodic fit* error...cannot compute, kitten calendar?
2011-06-16 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his lighter fluid and matches, ignoring the massive wall of flame growing from the pile of kitty calendars he'd stacked against the children's park as revenge for parents hate for candy*


What about computational errors?
2011-06-16 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Poor Old Perv!
2011-06-16 [Avaz]: Except he's not a perv, that's why it's funny.


Going against tropes = comic gold. :D
2011-06-16 [Nekko fox]: Both of you shut up! He was delivering the candy to a factory when he found out that it burned down, killed his wife, and abducted his daughter! Have you no humanity? Oh wait, you're in Bob's Diner...


Never mind...


*Eats Mort's ramen, chewing through the razor blades and lemon rinds*
2011-06-16 [Mortified Penguin]: MY RAZOR BLADES AND LEMON RINDS!


Sorry, little Bobby. I can't do that magic trick for your birthday now. *little Bobby is visibly upset by this news*


"Can't you just use lime rinds instead, mister?"


NO, YOU UNGRATEFUL LITTLE PIECE OF GARBAGE! *starts beating him with a bag of spare lemon rinds and razor blades*
2011-06-16 [Nekko fox]: *Starts beating the child with all these limes he can't hold just because everyone else is doing it*
2011-06-16 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: *shakes head* Use Oranges!
2011-06-16 [Nekko fox]: *Beats [~Queen Of The Shadows~] with kumquats and tangerines*


Don't give me advice kid! I've been around since before you were around, living behind nothing much and doing things that are generally considered alright by society!


*starts playing Tetris in Mort's chair*
2011-06-16 [American Revolutionary]: *grabs a m4 assault rifle*
2011-06-16 [Lord Josmar]: *Grabs m5 assault rifle just to one-up [American Revolutionary]*
2011-06-16 [American Revolutionary]: *aims at josmar* eat lead iraqi shitbag!!!!!!
2011-06-17 [Lord Josmar]: *A bag of Iraqi feces looks up from its bowl of Leady Charms*
2011-06-17 [American Revolutionary]: *twitch twitch* ermmmm uhhhhh *cough* vietnamese scumbag?
2011-06-17 [Lord Josmar]: *A bag of Vietnamese scum looks up from its bowl of Vietnamese scum*


Hey! No cannibalism in the "No Cannibalism" section!
2011-06-17 [American Revolutionary]: *double twitch* god damn it....im callin in an ac130 airstrike
2011-06-17 [Lord Josmar]: ...I didn't know they delivered...


*Rimshot*
2011-06-17 [American Revolutionary]: *drops over,twitching*
2011-06-17 [Nekko fox]: Oh, we're selling rimshots now?


*Puts up a sign saying "Come See Lord Josmar, Free Rim Jobs!" besides their eviction notice and warrants for Mort's arrest. People start lining up*
2011-06-17 [Nekko fox]: *The bags of shit and bags of scum line up as well, dragging Sniper's twitching, convulsing body along with them, thinking that he needs to relax and have a rim shot job*
2011-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort, having just awoken after a raging late night bender of tequila and burritos, decides, partially prompted by the lack of toilet paper in the bathroom, a rim shot job is just the thing he needs to freshen up*... *Mort cancels his Father's Day plans to wait in line, even though it isn't necessary, as Father's Day is still a few days away*... *Mort's father sits alone in a nursing home*...
2011-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Papa? Papa! What are you doing in this nursing home all alone, papa?! You KNOW I told you it was too damn EXPENSIVE! *bashes his father over the head with a skillet and stuffs him into a sack* GET BACK UNDER THE OVERPASS WHERE YOU BELONG, OLD MAN!! *violently tosses the sack in the direction of the overpass, but it misses horribly and rolls down a hill, over broken glass and used needles, and into a river*... *a passing freshwater river shark eats the sack and, presumably, the contents of said sack*...
2011-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh. Well, crap. At least my Sunday is all cleared up now... ladies. *a large crowd of beautiful women gather around and start getting naked, like usual*
2011-06-17 [Nekko fox]: Oh good, my painting models have shown up. Okay ladies, line up in single file at the door and we'll start processing you for the job.


*as the women walk through the door they are subsequently ground up and dropped into the compost heap on the front door*


Well damn, I thought I had that routed to the river shark preservation society...
2011-06-17 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Sexy party! Everyone's invited except that Misty girl! *hands out fliers*
2011-06-17 [Nekko fox]: Hey, don't be racist against land whales!
2011-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I believe we all agreed, more than a year ago, that [~Queen Of The Shadows~] is a clone of [~Crimson Angel~], pretending to be her cousin.


*a group of land whales look up from their platter of land krill*
2011-06-17 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Wait a cotton-picking moment.


I recognize that misty person.


I saw her, on another profile, dressed up as avatar characters and such. She has multiple houses!


*Steals all the sexy party fliers and invites Stewie instead.*
 Now, NOW the smexiness comes. Brian is one hot (dog) dammit. I went there.
2011-06-17 [Lord Josmar]: Shhhh! You'll give Disney new movie ideas!


*A person with a high collar trench coat and mouse ears quickly gets up from their table and tries to flee*


Get back here you mousey bastard.


*Chases after mousey individual wielding a giant mouse trap*
2011-06-17 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Pinches cheese from said trap, and kicks mouse person in the tail butt with her boot, and proceeds's to grate both cheese and mouse butt over her pasta.* Now WHERE in the hell is that TRAMP? *Adjusts bra-straps in public*.
2011-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *muffled barking can be heard from the soup, but it soon ceases*
2011-06-17 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Lead can be seen hanging from the dishwasher*
2011-06-18 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Oh Please, I'm not that creepy Misty girl. Oh, and I've never seen her dressed as a character from that creepy Avatar movie, that would make 3 times as creepy.
2011-06-18 [Pillowthief]: It is quite suspicious though, as we can't see your entire face and your DOBs are a day apart. And you both love anime and go to the same anime wikis.


Very suspicious indeed. *twirls pencil-thin mustache teeth*
2011-06-18 [kians mummy]: whats happend to the pics at the top
2011-06-18 [Nekko fox]: *Backhands The Shades Queen of Leotards with Sammie H(erk)*


No one can deny the truth of objective reasoning!


*Pees on Sammie's foot, walks off whistling and is beaten up by a large group of colored people, as is their nature*


Damn you vile juggalos!
2011-06-18 [kians mummy]: mmmmmmmm karma
2011-06-18 [Nekko fox]: *Walks back in, unhurt and quite chipper, and points dramatically at Sammie*


Your ignorant misuse of religious beliefs to bolster your own pretentious and misguided opinions is offensive. According to Vedanta, my actions and, in turn my karma are directed by God himself. As well, according to Spritism, Hinduism, and Buddhism, spirits are encouraged to choose how (and when) to suffer retribution for the wrong they did in previous lives as well as determines how their next life shall be determined.


*The juggalos promtply beat Sammie H with bricks before nailing her to the ground for having a misguided superiority complex and for being ignorant*


Also, karma has no power in roleplay, much less the irreligious zone Bob's Diner (now with God-Suppressing Deity Shields). Quit being daft.


*reads The Globe and chuckle about how the Pope married Godzilla again*


Oh Pope, what WON'T you do for your mindless flock?
2011-06-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-06-18 [Nekko fox]: Also,


  



  



  



  



  



  

2011-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in with a bunch of African American gentlemen from my church group*


Whoa, hey! Cool it with the gratuitous use of the 'n' word and the mockery of our lord and savior, Jesus H. Christ of Nazareth! You know these stupid knuckle dragging subhumans get offended by that kind of thing! Not only that, but these fat, ugly, chicken gobblin', watermelon slobbin' animals hate it when you make fun of that dead, 2000-year-old kike!
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: These things just happen.
2011-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: And those things?! For the love of God, do THOSE things happen?!?!!! *points at some things that are totally happening*
2011-06-19 [Lord Josmar]: *Stands in the midst of happening things doing a happening dance to some happening music.*


What is happening cool cats?
2011-06-19 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: You can't see all of my face because I prefer to save it for my real life friends, I don't want some creepy stalker/rapist/murderer that picks his victims from the internet to find me, a lot of people like anime, which is why there are anime wikis on here and I can't control the day of my birth if I could my birthday would be Halloween!
2011-06-19 [Lord Josmar]: Stalkers? What stalkers?


*Starts taking pictures of Queen from behind small house plant.*
2011-06-19 [Pillowthief]: Crap. Now I broke Elftrons embedding protocols and cant see the Rainbow-Poptart-Kitten any longer. I cant believe I watched that clear though anyways.
2011-06-19 [Pillowthief]: Dude. We totally know it's you. One of your Friend Relations is called "Friends who love Misty-chan" but you're not listed as being friends with her. And why would you, when you can just switch profiles?


And I was just told you have the cure to our rainforest crisis, but have been holding back?! How dare you!
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: MY GODS!


*Steps out from behind nothing much*


He's right!


There ARE no stalkers on the internet! Quit fear-mongering and spreading the ignorance. also, would somebody please take Henry the Monkey outside? His flinging feces again?


*A monkey hits Queen in the face with a big smelly blob*
2011-06-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I stalk strawberries. Does that count?
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: YES! Now take out Henry.
2011-06-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Lowers head, and clips leash onto Henry* Come now Henry. You smell like crap.
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: Um, that's a Pedro, our little Hispanic helper...thing.
2011-06-19 [Pillowthief]: Strawberries are close to gingers, which rearranged is niggers. You really shouldn't stalk them, that might be construed as a hate crime. And speaking about crime, stop stealing our help! The Ukrainian interns haven't thawed out yet and we're short on staff.
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: Wait, we hired from the Ukraine? Damn it all Mort, I told you we need Belgian! They make the waffles, they do the work!
2011-06-19 [Aliz]: Mmm. Waffles *______*
Hire some Hamburgers too :D
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: Hamburgers only make malted soy bisque.
2011-06-19 [Pillowthief]: Yeah. I looked into it- I was hungry for some hamburgers too. *throws some german guy in the soup* Unfortunately they only make crappy third rate malted soy bisque. We make better here! *opens a can (New! Canned bisque!) of Bobs™ Malted Soy Bisque©*
2011-06-19 Wimpy: *Looks disappointingly towards the soup*


I would gladly pay you Tuesda-
2011-06-19 [Pillowthief]: I SAID NO CREDIT! GET OUT OF HERE YOU BUM!
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: *Starts beating Wimpy with a pack of Flaming Badgers™*
2011-06-19 [Aliz]: ...can't we just fry the Hamburgers? =/
2011-06-19 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: We should fry the horse eyelashes.
2011-06-19 [American Revolutionary]: *dives umder table and plays with a predator drone*
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: *Smacks the Predator Drone out of the air with his hand*


Quit pissing around with your toys and help the customers.


*Takes the little R/C controller and throws it into the soup/magma*
2011-06-19 [American Revolutionary]: NOOOOO MY PRED DRONE..THERE GOES MY LEVEL 30 PRESTIGE!!!!
2011-06-19 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses your level thirty nerdiness in with the magma/phlegm*
2011-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, Wimpy, because you defaulted on the amortization we had set up for you last month, Bob's Corporate Empire seized all your intangible assets, including your intellectual properties and catch phrases, essentially meaning you can no longer offer to pay people Tuesday for things- particularly hamburgers and other food products- to be received today (the day the asking of the aforementioned food occurs). Failure to comply will result in a hefty fine being levied against you from corporate headquarters and/or a savage raping in the parking lot as you try to walk home at night. However, seeing as how you still have a few tangible goods for the taking *glances greedily at Wimpy's hat and shirt* we can set you up with a balloon loan. It has really low interest rates and, since I'm sure you're good for it, despite not paying us last time, we won't even require our usual $20,000 pre-loan adjustment scheduling fee (that people usually have to take out a loan to afford) and the $600 I-need-gas-so-I-can-follow-you-home-every-day-to-make-sure-you-aren't-trying-to-flee-the-country fee. *adjusts his accounting glasses and sips a refreshing can of Bob's™ Malted Soy Bisque© (now with 20% more Malt!)*
2011-06-20 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I don't know about any Friends Who Love Misty-chan page, and I don't have her listed as my friend cause we're cousins and I don't need some relation on a website to remind me of that, we may be family, but that doesn't mean anything, not all family members get along. Oh, and there are people who stalk, rape, and kill women after they find them online, haven't you ever heard of the Craigslist Killer? He seemed like a regular guy, he was a med student, he had a fiancee, he was good looking and he was pretty wealthy, but he would go on Craigslist, find a pretty girl, tell her where to meet him, then he'd tie them up, rape them and killed them and as a souvenir he'd steal their panties, and it took the police a while to find him cause he never attacked women in the town where he lived, and their profiling of him was all wrong, they sad he was probably a social outcast, had no friends, had no girlfriend, and had low-self esteam, but he was the opposite, he was popular, had a fiancee and was very confident.
2011-06-20 [Pillowthief]: SHU, remember? Seriously Misty1, sometimes it's like I dont even know you. Or care about you.
2011-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: "find a pretty girl"


Don't worry, I think you'll be fine. Besides, that monstrous eyebrow is a dead giveaway.
2011-06-20 [Nekko fox]: Aww, Mort zinged Misty1.


But in all honesty, quit trying to be a fear-monger. In a country of over 310 million people, you have higher odds of being struck and killed by a passing motorcycle being ridden by the Jolly Green Giant than you do of being stalked, raped, and murdered. You're just regurgitating feminist propaganda that's trying to destroy male civilization with your ovaries and failed grasp at Quantum physics.


*A group of Quantum Physicists who are both enjoying and at the same time not enjoying a meal with the Jolly Green Giant who just so happened to ride in on his motorcycle look up from their Cat in a Box (who is both dead and alive)©*


"We say!"
2011-06-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Schroedinger's Cat?
2011-06-20 [Nekko fox]: SCHRODINGER WILL KILL YOU LIKE A CAT IN A BOX.


MAYBE.
2011-06-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Then I will break radioactive gas. Or maybe not. Either way, somebody's dead, in my my mind anyways. But also, not.
2011-06-20 [Nekko fox]: Exactly. Or not.


But you'll change the outcome if you observe it.
2011-06-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Steps into box. Returns total opposite of herself. Scratches balls and belches loudly*
2011-06-20 [Avaz]: I suggest you use some Turtle Wax on those balls you scratched. It'll buff out the scratches and return them to their beautiful shine! :)
2011-06-20 [Nekko fox]: If Your Balls Don't Shine, It Ain't Bob'S...


TURTLE WAX!™
2011-06-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Wax on. Wax offfffff! Oh yeaaaah..
2011-06-20 [Nekko fox]: Please keep application of Bob's Turtle Wax™ to Seven-Hundred Eighty-Three uses a day or less. Consistent and repetitive use of Bob's Turtle Wax™ may cause:


Severe Scrotal Hemorrhaging


Ass Cancer


Malnutrition


Mud-Butt©


Explosive Diarrhea


Implosive Diarrhea


Running Nose


Sore Throat


Sore Nose


Running Shoes


Flabbergastion


Bastardization


Finding Yourself Being Friends with Sammie H or Misty (commonly referred to as "Living Hell" Syndrome)


Eating Toenails


Having Your Entire Intestinal Tract Fall Out Of Your Anus


Migraines


Yourgraines


Theirgraines


Malted Beverages Dispensing Themselves From Your Urethra


Severe Loss of Interest


Ennui


Abandonment of Hope


Lasers Firing From Your Nipples


and


Mild Fatigue...Caused by Radioactive Bear Vomit


Please do not bother your doctor if you experience any or all of these side-effects. They are purely temporary and you wouldn't live to find a cure regardless.












Bob's Turtle Wax™!




















2011-06-20 [Avaz]: What a marvelous product!
2011-06-20 [Lord Josmar]: I use it every hour!


*Arm falls off.*
2011-06-20 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Does it come with a free shammy?
2011-06-20 [Mortified Penguin]: No shir, it doesh not come with a free shammie. [kians mummy] ish shold sheparately.
2011-06-21 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Thanksh for the valuable product information
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: No problem...sh.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: And remember, when eating Bob's Turtle Wax™, always remember to practice safe consumption. When masticating, you must wear a condo-


Wait, can you eat this stuff? *some guy looks up from a bowl of Bob's Turtle Wax™ soup*... *he starts screaming and his face falls off, most likely caused by something completely unrelated*...
2011-06-21 [Lord Josmar]: OH! DIBS!


*Jumps over to fallen face and gobbles it up.*
2011-06-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: nya nya ny nya ny nya ny nya nya nya nya nya n n ny ny nya nya nya nyan nya nyan ny n n n n n nya nyan nya nya ny ny ny nyan! *flies through the skies, leaving a glorious rainbow behind*... *flies too close to a jet and gets sucked into the engine*... *poptart and kitten chunks rain down from the sky*...
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: Hey everybody. I know this is a very odd request but I would like anybody who knows {shooting star shadow} please contact me. If you know someone who has delt with him please have them contact me. It is very important that I talk to anyone who knows him and has talked to him. Thank you. I know that this is a very weird thing to request but I swear it is something that those of you who have something against him will have your revenge.
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: Oh, I've seen Shooting star whatever. Did he have the head, tail, and paws of a cat, but the body of a poptart, flew through space and went "nya nya ny nya ny nya ny nya nya nya nya nya n n ny ny nya nya nya nyan nya nyan ny n n n n n nya nyan nya nya ny ny ny nyan!"?


Yeah, sounds exactly like them. Good times.


Yeah, last I heard they got sucked into a jet engine when they flew too close to it and poptart and kitten chunks rained down from the sky.


Oh, the chuckles we had over that.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't think so. We here at Bob's Diner stand by our patrons. If you have a problem with our friend, you can just lea-


Wait, you have juicy gossip we can use to get revenge? Dish, bitch, dish! *pulls up a chair and listens closely*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: So it was Sagacious?
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: *sits in achair by mort n lights a cig* he is trying to go out with me n other girls at the same time. he tells them that he loves them and they are the only ones for him and dates them all at once. then he gets you to come up and see him and he gets them drunk or drugged then sleeps with them then leaves them.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, Nekko, it sounds more Salacious.
2011-06-21 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Dude, I'd rather be safe than sorry.
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: so does anybody else got some dirt on him so i can fry his ass? i dont take too kindly to those who try n use me n get me to break up with my bf.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I have nothing else. I have this mud here, but sadly no dirt. But it's terrible that anyone would do such a thing. Terrible, terrible, terrible... say, would you like a drink to calm your nerves? *hands [Littel Wolf] a suspicious fizzing martini that still has a conspicuous bit of undissolved pill floating in it*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: No thanks mort unless you have you add some blood in it n a little flesh then sure.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: No problem, sweet cheeks. Yo, Pedro!


"Que?"


Bring me the box cutter!


"Por que?"


Don't you give me no sass, boy!!
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: mm fresh i like. *gives and evil grin* So mort is [Shooting Star Shadow] a regular here?
2011-06-21 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: I don't think you want Mort's blood or flesh, it's toxic
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: thats fine im used to dealing with toxins. it makes the blood pump harder. but thank you for your concern that is very kind of you.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: What, [Shooting Star Shadow]? Aw, of course! Of course! I remember back in '94, the first time he ever stumbled in here. He was all, "Hey," and then [nokaredes] was all, "Hi," and then the health inspector was all, "OH MY GOD, IS THAT THING ALIVE?!" and I was all, "Chill, bro. Just keep hittin' it with that skillet," and it was all, "Please, no! Stop hitting me with that skillet! I just wanted a refill, I'm sorry!!" and I was all, "NO REFILLS," and I pointed at the sign, but the sign said "FREE REFILLS," because I forgot we had changed the sign and then we all had a laugh, except the guy who didn't, because he was a dick.
2011-06-21 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Elftown wasn't created until 2002, so it's impossible for him to have been here since 94
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: wow that is an interesting story mort. Very funny too. does he come here anymore like has he been here this month last month some time this year?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ha ha, silly. We're talking about Bob's Diner (the wiki), not Elftown (the website).
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: [~Queen Of The Shadows~] i think mort has been here so long that he has lost all track of time.
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: so has he been here recently?
2011-06-21 [~Queen Of The Shadows~]: Since bob's diner is a wiki on ELFTOWN and Elftown has only been around since 2002 this wiki could not have been created. I agree Little Wolf.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, according to the Bob's Diner section on my [Shooting Star Shadow] Comment Index™, he hasn't been here since the last time he was here, which, apparently, was fornever ago, so no, he hasn't been here since the point in time which he was never here, which was not in the last month (not to be confused with the Final Month™) nor in the current month nor in any month for that matter, because months are intagible units of time that cannot be entered into or climbed over or pushed into traffic, like other corporeal things.
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: Maybe he needs help remembering what year it is and maybe go out and get some nice fresh air.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I know Elftown was created in 2002, but Elftown is a website and Bob's Diner is a wiki, which is not a website and, on occasion, isn't even a wiki.
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: thank you mort. Now I know you have a anouther bar on fake. Does he go there?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: It's a diner, not a bar, and I don't know. In fact, the diner, not a bar, may or may not exist. I can't recall. I'm sure it does, but I don't care to confirm.
2011-06-21 PATRICK: FUCK A DUCK WITH A PURPLE FEATHER!!
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *a duck looks up from his chicken sandwich and is appalled*
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *a chicken looks up from his turkey sandwich and is appalled*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: sorry about that mort. i used to be on fake but left a while ago but i do remeber seeing your diner as a wiki over there too. So do you have anything that i can use against [Shooting Star Shadow]? Also where is my drink that i ordered from you a while ago?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *[Sagacious Turkey] looks up from between some bread and is a-Paul'd (by [Paul Doyle])*
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Drink? You didn't order no stinkin' drink! *slams a drink that was sitting on the counter to the floor in a fit of rage*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: Um Mort that was the drink that you just knocked on the floor *pointing at the glass while laughing my ass off*
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Floor? We ain't got no stinkin' floor! *slams the floor that was sitting on the floor to the floor in a fit of surrealism*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: if you ain't got no floor then what in the world is holding up all the chairs, tables, and people?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Chairs, tables, and people?! We ain't got no ch- Ah, screw it.


No, Pedro! NO! I said screw, you stupid wetback! *smacks the wrench out of his hand*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: Mort? WE AIN'T GOT NO MORT!


* Throws Mort to the floor with the floor and the drink*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: so can i have a whisky?
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: *gets up and walks over to nekko* how you doing nekko?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *merges with the floor, becoming the mighty and sturdy Floort™!


Ha haa!! Now I'm more powerful than ever before! No more will I let you people walk all over me! *is a floor*... *people continue walking all over me*...


Damn you all!!
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: *walks over to the floor that is mort* dude how are you going to stop being a floor? and how long do you plain to let people walk all over you?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Please, call me Dr. Floort, PhD (pronounced 'fud'). I simultaneously both am and am not a physicist, until you check the validity of my degree. *points (using a loose floorboard) at a framed piece of paper on the wall drawn on with crayons that says "grajewate of cowledge"*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: *looks to where the floorboard was pointing* ah im very sorry Dr. Floort PhD. I did not mean to affend you. Is there anything that i can get you?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Two small orphan children will do, thanks. I hunger. *licks floor lips greedily*


Ew, tastes like floor.
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from spit frying the orphans*


Is that a no on the orphans and petty revenge, or are is the order still good?
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: Both are good nekko.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, ah, ah! *wags finger erotically* Well. Both are well.


*points at his English degree on the wall that says "grajewate of anglush" written in what appears to be zebra blood*
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: *looks down at Dr. Floort evily and grins* You know I have no idea where your ashtry is so I guess i will just put it out on the floor. *drops cig butt on Dr. Floort and stomps on it really hard with my steel toed boot*
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Ew, cigarette butt!! *shakes violently, spilling many a drink and damaging many a baby*


Well, at least it's better than cigarette crotch.
2011-06-21 [Littel Wolf]: *stomps on Dr. Floort* Hey quit shaking. You are going to break down the diner even more if you dont stop doing that you know. You know what will happen if you break the diner? I will tell you. I would rip you apart and use you as fire wood for the new diner.
2011-06-21 PATRICK: I LIKE TO FUCK DUCKS WITH PURPLE FEATHERS!!! *fucks a duck with a purple feather*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: *Watches Patrick in bemused silence with a bemused expression on his bemused face*


Eh, it's been done before.


*Breaks time in half and pours it into a skillet and makes everyone time omelets. None are very good because they have an overpowering flavor of clock, but no one complains because everyone who consumed an omelet collapses into dust or somehow manages to become this terrible, unbirthed tragedy of science*
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *Misty, already having been a terrible tragedy of science, is unaffected by the time omelets, several of which contained ham (I just thought you would like to know)*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: Dear God, what has science done?


*eats Mort*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *yells from his spot in the esophagus* Fight the power! Blow that trumpet!


*hears gentle sitar music coming from the parking lot*


YOU DARN KIDS, I TOLD YOU NO MORE STUPID SITARS!!! *points, jabbing an arm through Nekko's throat, at a sign on the wall with a picture of a sitar that has been circled and crossed out in red*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: *angles his neck, now with a protruding Mort arm, so that it and the arm are pointing at a commercial airliner. With the power of neck and arm combined and creating a laser blast containing all the wrathful fusion energy of twenty million suns, the commercial airliner experiences some minor turbulence and carries on as usual.*


*Also, everyone on board now has severe liver cancer*
2011-06-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Also, my nipples just fell off. So that's a big concern too.
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *my arm also develops severe liver cancer, and, somewhat more surprisingly, a liver*
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: *His neck develops an ego. No one seems to mind*
2011-06-21 [Avaz]: [9jlriexqk,ktpk], I took them. You were due for an inspection; it's part of my smut god duties. :) You should have them back soon enough.
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-06-21 Patrick: *walks in with my sex slave which is a duck on a leash wearing an ankle bracelet* Stupid Pigeon!
2011-06-21 [Nekko fox]: Can't you see he's busy juggling all those fucks he doesn't give?
2011-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Aw, come on! Just give me one!


"No! They're MY fucks!" *he continues juggling*


Selfish jerk.
2011-06-21 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: How rude. All this fucking.
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: Hey, fucking is the awesomeness that burns in the hearts and minds of ALL OF HUMANITY!


And some gaseous beings.
2011-06-22 [American Revolutionary]: *stats tappin in random codes for a nuclear missile* HA! i am invincible
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: No one understands Morse code anymore -.-. / .--. .. . -.-. . / --- ..-. / .-.. .- -. --. ..- .. -.. / -.. . - .-. .. - ..- ... .-.-.-
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: -.. . .- .-. / -.-. .... .-. .. ... - / .-- .... .- - / - .... . / .... . .-.. .-.. / .... .- .--. .--. . -. . -.. ..--..?
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: ..-. ..- -.-. -.- / -.-- --- ..- / ... -. .. .--. . .-. --..-- / - .... .. ... / .. ... / .- .-.. .-.. / -.-- --- ..- .-. / ..-. .- ..- .-.. - .-.-.-.
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: *. .- - ... / .-. .- -- . -. / .. -. / -- --- .-. ... . / -.-. --- -.. . / -... ..- - / --- -. .-.. -.-- / -... . -.-. .- ..- ... . / .... . / -.-. .- -. / -. --- - / ..- -. -.. . .-. ... - .- -. -.. / .... --- .-- / - --- / -.. . .- .-.. / .-- .. - .... / .. - / .. -. / .- -. -.-- / --- - .... . .-. / .-- .- -.-- .-.-.-*
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: -.-- --- ..- .----. .-. . .- -. .. -.. .. --- - .-.-.- .- -. -.. -.-- . ... --..-- .. .- --. .-. . . --..-- ... -. .. .--. . .-. .. ... .- - ..-. .- ..- .-.. - .-.-.- -.. .- -- -. -.-- --- ..- ! * - .... .-. --- .-- ... ... -. .. .--. . .-. .. -. - .... . ... --- ..- .--. * * ... -. . .- -.- ... ..- .--. -... . .... .. -. -.. ... --- ..- .--. .- -. -.. -.- -. .. ..-. . ... .. - .. -. - .... . -... .- -.-. -.- *


 -.-. .... .- .. -. -... .-. . .- -.- . .-. !
* + ..---  . -..- .--. *
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: Piece of crap only gave me +2 exp? Worthless.
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: * ... -. . .- -.- ...  ..- .--.  -... . .... .. -. -.. [ .. -. ..-. .. -. .. - -.--  .... -.-- .--. --- - .... --- ... .. ... ] .- -. -..  -.- -. .. ..-. . ...  .... .. -- -..-. .... . .-.  .. -.  - .... .  -... .- -.-. -.- *
* + ..--- ....- ---..  . -..- .--. *
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: Much better.
2011-06-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: :(
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: That's for Bender, you whore! *goes off trash talking to 13yrds over xboxlive, who are, unfortunately, much better at trash talking than me*
2011-06-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: x-box smells of old navy dudes armpits
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: And 13yr olds. They hurt my feelings.
2011-06-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I dine on 13 yr olds. Mostly, because they annoy me, but also because they taste of chicken. Juvie chicken
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: Perv!
2011-06-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Am not!
2011-06-22 [Pillowthief]: *the other boob stares [Pillowthief] in the eyes before starting to snarl as well*
2011-06-22 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: The puppies! No wait!-
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: HOLY DOG TITS, YOU'VE GOT DOGS IN YOUR TITS!


*He hurries to not care while simultaneously doing jack shit to prepare for the invasion of the dog tits*
2011-06-22 Crimson Moon Goddess: *Woof*
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: *kicks the Crimson Moon Goddess in her rump*


Shut up bitch! No barking in the restaurant.




*Drags her out into the back of the restaurant and into the alley by the scruff of her neck and sics her against pit bulls. He loses ten dollars because apparently no one taught the Crimson Moon Goddess (a snooty name meaning 'incapable of taking a bite to the throat) how to fight in a ring with three other angry dogs. Leaves with his pride wounded, but he vows that one day he'll return and bring a werewolf. THAT'LL show the smug dog fighter's guild*
2011-06-22 [Nekko fox]: *Comes back, lugging a snarling, slavering, frothing werewolf by its scruff. He promptly turns around and walks away when he sees the thirty-nine cops cars surrounding what once was a quiet and humble dog-fighting ring*


Damned Brother Brother, always tearing down little home-grown businesses just so the bigger corporations can corner the market. Sorry Mr. Fluffles, looks like you won't be fighting the other dogs today.


*Mr. Fluffles the adorable werewolf looks crestfallen at the news. Weeping wolfish tears, he goes and tears Sammie H's arm off and eats it to console himself*
2011-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Bob's Corporate Dog Fighting League buys up the spot in the alley*... *the BCDFL immediately sells out and gives ad space to Coca-Cola, McDonald's, Ford, Granny's Homegrown Bunyan Cream, and Wal-Mart*...
2011-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts shouting a series of beeps at an old woman eating her food* -.. --- -. .----. - / - .-. .- -. ... .-.. .- - . / - .... .. ... --..-- / -.-- --- ..- / ... .-.. ..- - / -=- .._ ._= =+- -.. ._. .+= ==. / =_= ... .+.!!!!


*she looks up and responds with ".-- .... .- - ..--.. / .. / -.-. .- -. .----. - / ..- -. -.. . .-. ... - .- -. -.. / -.-- --- ..- --..-- / -.-- --- ..- .-. / .- -.-. -.-. . -. - / .. ... / - --- --- / - .... .. -.-. -.- .-.-.- / -.-- --- ..- / -. . . -.. / - --- / . -. ..- -. -.-. .. .- - . / -.-- --- ..- .-. / .--. . .-. .. --- -.. ... / -... . - - . .-. / .- -. -.. / -.. --- -. .----. - / ... - --- .--. / ... --- / ... .... --- .-. - / --- -. / -.-- --- ..- .-. / -.. .- ... .... . ... .-.-.- / .- -. -.. / .-- .... .- - / - .... . / .... . .-.. .-.. / .. ... / .-- .. - .... / - .... --- ... . / ..- -. -.. . .-. ... -.-. --- .-. . ... --..-- / . --.- ..- .- .-.. / ... .. --. -. ... --..-- / .- -. -.. / .--. .-.. ..- ... / ... .. --. -. ... ..--.. / .- .-. . / -.-- --- ..- / ... - ..- .--. .. -.. / --- .-. / ... --- -- . - .... .. -. --. ..--.. / ..-. .- --. --. --- - .-.-.-" and calmly goes back to eating her food*


*breaks a bottle over the table and starts stabbing her with it*
2011-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: * + ....- ----- ----- . -..- .--. *
2011-06-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: You're weird.
2011-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, well you are dash dot dash dot space dash dash dash space dot dash dot space dot dash dot space dot space dash dot dash dot space dash.
2011-06-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Silly boy, I don't know morse code.
2011-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: -- . / . .. - .... . .-.
2011-06-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: It appears you're the only one here, I'll come back to this wiki when some more interesting is here.
2011-06-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Ricky, the interesting ghost, comes floating through the wall*
2011-06-23 [Avaz]: *Casper, the friendly ghost, greets Ricky with a wave*
2011-06-23 [Imperator]: *Casper gets hit by a truck and dies, spilling transparent blood everywhere*
2011-06-23 [Lord Josmar]: *The truck driver, however, goes on to live an long and happy life with his wife and three kids in their lovely home in the suburbs. Till one day when the Ghost of Casper the Ghost finds him!*
2011-06-23 [Avaz]: *MetaCasper becomes a seething ball of white-hot rage*
2011-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *MetaMucil becomes a soothing bowl of white, hot soup*


*Mort eats the MetaMucil soup*


*Mort gains +2 fiber!*
2011-06-23 [Avaz]: *Toilets worldwide rejoice and begin placing bets as to which one will receive the end result of Mort's +2 fiber gain*
2011-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *[kians mummy]'s mom's face is the lucky victor*... *she swiftly receives her prize, followed by a congratulatory falcon punch in the uterus, effectively ending the possibility of more [kians mummy]s*...
2011-06-23 [Pillowthief]: Crap. I had ten bucks on [9jlriexqk,ktpk]. .-- .... -.--  -.. --- . ...  -- .. ... - -.-- .----  .... .- ...- .  - ---  .-. ..- .. -.  -- -.--  ..-. ..- -.  .- .-.. .-..  - .... .  - .. -- . ..--..  ..  ... - .. .-.. .-..  -... .-.. .- -- .  ... -. .. .--. . .-. .-.-.-
2011-06-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Who is this [9jlriexqk,ktpk]? *Looks under the table*
2011-06-23 [American Revolutionary]: *uses the pred drone to lodge a missile up josmars ass* ha ha ake that fuckwad!!!!!
2011-06-23 [kians mummy]: frizbey attack *ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh*
2011-06-23 [Nekko fox]: *the frisbee flops ineffectually to the floor and is trod upon by Stan, the less evil second cousin of Satan*
2011-06-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Satan is my son. Leave him the fuck alone.
2011-06-23 [Nekko fox]: Wait, when did I become your son?


*Hides his horns under comfortable, roomy hat*
2011-06-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Well. Its very simple. One day, daddy Satan and I decided to make love cherries, and that is the time that you became my son dear. Then, you were adopted by some lovely nuns who liked to play soccer and wear knee high socks..so, surprise, son!
2011-06-23 [Nekko fox]: OH DEAR GOD, NOT KNEE HIGH SOCKS!


*Is not, in fact, altogether troubled by knee high socks*
2011-06-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Don't bring my ex into this, please.
2011-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *God looks up from his bowl of nuns in knee high socks*
2011-06-23 [Nekko fox]: *the nuns are all God-fearing nuns and shriek in a perfect display of terror. God seems amused. His son, Bob, the REAL savior of mankind, doesn't find it quite as funny*
2011-06-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Knee high socks are the most uncomfortable and troublesome form of socks, they always seem to fall down at the strangest times.
2011-06-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Are they? My knee and thigh highs suit me just fine. I live in them! I HATE ankle socks. Wait-why are we talking about socks agan?
2011-06-24 [Nekko fox]: HOLY SHIT! LANDWHALE!


*Harpoons Misty in her battleship of an ass and stands triumphant over her bloated, heaving carcass. He gestures to his manservant, Wilhelm, to grab the camera and flash bulbs*


I do believe I will have this Hambeast stuffed and placed in my study by the fire. It truly is a ferocious beast...


*the manservant nods his head a few times, hoping to receive that fifteen cent tip he was promised at the beginning of the African Safari Adventure at Bob's Diner and Animal Kingdom Extravaganza. It is a tip he will never see...*
2011-06-24 [Lord Josmar]: Knee highs? Thigh highs? Amateurs! I only wear waist highs!


  

2011-06-24 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Oh my god.
2011-06-24 [Avaz]: That is so awesome. I can't tell if it's win-awesome or fail-awesome, though. >_>
2011-06-24 [Lord Josmar]: I think it depends on who is wearing them.
2011-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Smaug, a once wealthy landowner and gold hoarder (until an unfortunate incident with some dwarves and a fat midget), now Bob's Diner's new trash man, swoops in and steals Nekko's prized Hambeast, returning the bloated behemoth to his trash pile in the parking lot*
2011-06-24 Johnny: Stay gold, Ponyboy... stay gold.
2011-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *the half-boy, half-pony, centaur-like monstrosity roars and starts turning gold*... *the golden beast stamps its newly metallic hooves and starts to devour the corpse of his former friend, presumably to gain his powers*
2011-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Ponyboy flies away into the night sky, occasionally firing concentrated laserbeams at bats that unwittingly cross his path*... *he then proceeds to lay waste to many a village and town, killing all the greasers and Socs that stand between him and the place that is behind them. Had they only stood two feet to the left, they might have survived*...


Wait, that's not how that book ended...


*the golden equine turns around and glares*


B-but, maybe I just forgot. Y-yeah! I totally remembering this all happening!
2011-06-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Dude, you can't kill me, I've been alive for centuries. I'm Mortified Penguin's great great great great great great aunt, I'm an imortal witch.
2011-06-24 [Paul Doyle]: Plz don't shart in yer shants, mmmkay?
2011-06-24 [American Revolutionary]: *stps out only to be blown to pieces by a suddenly dropped claymore mine*
2011-06-25 [Mystin]: I was referred here, so don't let me down Mort! I need an escape!
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah... escape... about that... *slowly starts chaining up the doors*
2011-06-25 [Mystin]: Ummm.......
2011-06-25 [Thunder Cid]: *The homeless look up and see the meat grinder*
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *the meat grinder looks up and sees the homeless*
2011-06-25 [Thunder Cid]: *The homeless make a break for it*
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *the meat grinder, unappeased by the measly break the homeless constructed for it, starts attacking, before realizing it has no legs, or teeth, or arms, or anything else necessary for attacking*
2011-06-25 [Thunder Cid]: Hey that's not a meat grinder...it's a DALEK!
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Daleks start swarming out of the kitchen and carry [~Crimson Angel~] off into the streets*... *nobody seems to mind or even notice*...
2011-06-25 [Thunder Cid]: *the homeless watch [~Crimson Angel~] being taken off and go back to their meal of styrofoam and apple cores*
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: MY STYROFOAM AND APPLE CORES!!


*starts beating the homeless away with a broom*... *they get scared and fly away*...
2011-06-25 [Thunder Cid]: Homeless can fly?
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, yeah. Duh. How else would they get to and from their homes? The subway? As if. The quizno? No way! Train? They have some good songs, but they can't really transport people from place to place, they have concerts they need to be at.
2011-06-25 [Thunder Cid]: They could walk or...cartpool.
2011-06-25 [djxmonster]: *stumbles in drunk... again*
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from the bar and stops wiping down mugs*


Welcome, sir. What'll it be? *casually puts a cigar out in Tiny Tim's eye socket*
2011-06-25 [Flisky]: Finally, something intelligent has happened. Tiny Tim has been eyeing me strangely all week. *goes back to newspaper*
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: He's been doing WHAT?! *grabs a baseball bat off the weapon rack*


"No, sir! Don't believe her, sir! It isn't true, it isn't! OH GOD, MY FACE! BLIMEY, THIS HURTS, IT DOES! SWEET SATAN, NOT MY SPINE! NNNNNOOOOOOO!!!"


*spits on the sobbing, bleeding child, curled up in a ball* That, unless I completely misunderstood what she said, will teach you to be drying her bay tree. You KNOW those trees need water! *kicks him in the ribs* Ew, now there's barbecue sauce on my shoes...
2011-06-25 [Flisky]: And now he is a Satan worshiper? Oh, the blasphemy. *all said without looking up from newspaper*
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: It's disgraceful is what it is.


*a red, horned gentleman (presumably a farmer, as he carries a pitch fork) pipes up* "A disgrace! It's just shameful!"


Yeah, you tell 'em, Stan!
2011-06-25 [Flisky]: *nods at Stan* Good man, that Stan.
2011-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Quite a nice fellow, indeed.


*Stan walks out, with a large, burlap sack slung over his shoulder*... *the contents of the sack starts wriggling and screaming for help*... *a few curious and concerned customers look up in his direction*...


"Say, feller. What you got in that sack there?"


"This sack? Uh... turnips?" *he slams the sack against the wall and it stops making noise*


*the customers, satisfied by this answer, all nod and return to their meals*
2011-06-25 [Flisky]: *returns to newspaper*
2011-06-25 [Imperator]: *returns his defective Wal-Mart products - WITHOUT A RECEIPT*
2011-06-25 [Nekko fox]: Imperator, you...you MONSTER!


*The economy collapses, society devours itself, and civilization immediately bursts into flames and takes hundreds of millions of people with it, leaving orphans throughout the world wishing Imperator had just brought along their receipt*




Also, Mort, that Landwhale Misty is claiming to be your distant aunt. I think they have a cream for that, but you should get it checked out.
2011-06-25 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Mort is my son. My alter ego has gotten around you know..And no, I am in no way related to this Misty character.
2011-06-25 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I think I found that Misty? http://www.weebls-stuff.com/toons/Billy+Potatoes/
2011-06-26 [Flisky]: But...that whale is so cute! It can't be Misty!
2011-06-26 [Nekko fox]: Flisky makes a persuasive argument.
2011-06-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Okay. Well this is me. You know the alter ego I was talking about? That's meh blog :P Haha :D http://infinitedawn111.blogspot.com/
2011-06-26 [Nekko fox]: Grandma?! How the fuck did you get onto B's D? I mean, seriously, I told ward at the Shady Cemetery Old Folks High Security Relaxation Center For The Mentally Diseased and Elderly that you aren't to be given any internet access.
2011-06-26 [Nekko fox]: Looks I'm gonna have to talk to him about that five dollar "tip" I gave him.
2011-06-26 [Jewl]: Wait, that's YOUR grandma?? Then we must be related, or else I've been visiting the wrong old lady for the last 7 years...
2011-06-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: No, that's ME. And thats also my blog :D Haha
2011-06-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Ninja owl of doom




'He knows when you are sleeping


He knows when you at ease, at pleasure or face down in a pool of your own vomit


He knows what you're going to say before you even thought it.


He knows every dang dirty thought you ever had, every time you mentally undressed that bird on the front of Bored House Wives magazine, the one with the large baps and the gunt to match.


He knows, and Brown Owl, Big Bird Ninja of Doom judges you.


You dirty, dirty boy.


The owl is omnipotent, impotent and all knowing


Fear that little bi/ch owl. Because he's coming for you, and he's gonna jimmy your car and pop a cap in your ass


P.s, he left a big ass gift in your bird box. Relish it. It's gonna leave a mark.'
2011-06-26 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Bandi The Banana




Rogue Transmission #No . @!*!




Audible:




Translator:


Greetings my Fruitlings. You are all a fine bunch of fruit. Lovely indeed. Especially the coconuts.
I want to juice you all just gazing at you. My loyal subjects. Gather your teepee's and your tomahawks and together we will wage war on the human farmed fruits, the meek and gentle way of the loam, the vegetable and field. We will separate the wheat from the chaff and we will peel those who dare to peel and eat us.
Take heed my friends,let me intro-juice you to your future.
Viva la Revolution!
Death to the human! And death to the tomato! They bring me out in a rash!
2011-06-27 [American Revolutionary]: THAR YE MATEY YAR BOOTY SHIVERS MEH TIMBER
2011-06-27 [Nekko fox]: Quiet pirate boy.
2011-06-27 [Thunder Cid]: Hey you bunch of pudgy faced applejohns! Put down the chicken wings and go add shit to 3 Words in Time.
2011-06-27 [Lord Josmar]: Hey! I dont eat chicken wings! Thank you very much!


*Takes a bite out of his American Bald Eagles wings in BBQ sauce.*


MMM-mmm. Patrioticy!
2011-06-27 [twitchboy]: cause chikuns fer pussies
2011-06-27 [Nekko fox]: *Glances at a Wanted posted taped next to the "Chuckle of the Month" picks from the 'Suggestions for Improvements' box and notices that Thunder Cid is a wanted felon/child molester/free-from jazz musician*


HOLY CRAP! SOMEBODY GRAB HIM BEFORE HE GETS BACK TO THAT WIKI PAGE HE BUILT, DEVOTED TO HIS EGO!


*He rushes to hesitate and goes back to doing what he does best....Everything*
2011-06-27 [Mortified Penguin]: You sick bastard. My father was killed by free-form jazz. Prepare to die. *draws sword*


Wait, that's not my line... *starts looking through the script/subpoena, but gets stabbed by a man with six fingers*
2011-06-27 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Six-Finger Jack, could you do me a favor and show me, on one hand, what two plus three is?


*Six-Finger Jack, looking confused, holds up his non-stabbing hand and extends five fingers to indicate the correct resulting number*


Thanks Six-Finger Jack!


*Six-Finger Jack goes back to ruthlessly stabbing Mort*
2011-06-27 [American Revolutionary]: *starts parading around in a nazi uniform* long live deutchland! forever give your heart to the reich!! heil hitler!!! sieg heil kommeraden!!!!
2011-06-27 [Jewl]: O.O shiiiiyiiiit.
2011-06-27 [Thunder Cid]: Hey those warrants were thrown out years ago...*remembers throwing them into to dumpster*
2011-06-27 [American Revolutionary]: long live hitler!!! long live the supreme chancellory!!! heil hitler!!!!!
2011-06-27 [Nekko fox]: Hitler was an alright guy, but I don't think he heils very well.
2011-06-27 [American Revolutionary]: join me in dance
2011-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: So I was walking down the street today, right? I passed by this black guy carrying a TV and I started freaking out, because I thought it was mine. But then I remembered mine was at home, washing the car.
2011-06-28 [Lord Josmar]: Don't you hate when that happens? That's why I keep mine with me at all times.


*Points to 42" flatscreen LCD tv attached to a leash and chewing vigorously on a plasma.*


Awww, isn't it cute how they assert their dominance like that?
2011-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's low definition television coughs and emits harmful radiation, before spitting up a VHS tape*
2011-06-28 [Lord Josmar]: *Inconspicously pulls tv away from inferior tv*


That's, uh, that's a cutie innit?
2011-06-28 [American Revolutionary]: *watches the tvs in utter fascination*
2011-06-28 [kians mummy]: member helpers, please join
2011-06-28 [Top_Hatter]: *feeds Nyan Cat to his Beta Max*
2011-06-28 [Pillowthief]: *Feeds Beta Max to his actual cat* *Humane Society reclaims the mt lion due to animal cruelty*
2011-06-28 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Hey. I can get a picture on your cat *Peers into cat anus*
2011-06-28 [Jewl]: It's my life goal to own a large cat sanctuary. With large cats in it.
2011-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Like lions and tigers and bears cougars? Oh my! *glances at the mothers of everyone here, washing my car with bikinis on and kissing each other sensually*


*shudders violently*
2011-06-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the car attempts to escape, but [Jewl]'s hulking mother weighs it down, while Nekko's mom/dad removes its tires*
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Meow?
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks a vase over [Alexi Ice]'s head and steals the rupee within*
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: *Dies*
2011-06-29 j@y!: Thank You Turkey for being so awesome!!! <3
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]:   


  



  

2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: LOL!
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *Von Lollington IV looks up from his salad* "Vhat do you vant? Mein salad? You cannot have mein salad." *he cradles the bowl of salad and brandishes his fork threateningly*
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: I actually just Vant to suck your blood! *NOMS*
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper*


Yeah, deliveries go around b- OH GOD, DON'T TOUCH HIS SALAD!! SWEET JESUS, DON'T DO IT!!!


*calmly returns to his newspaper and circles an ad about women's shoes*
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: *Flicks zombie chunks at the dudes forehead*
2011-06-29 Awesomez.: OMG anonymous. :D
2011-06-29 ShitFUCK: Suck it, bitches!
2011-06-29 ShitFUCK: Finks we shall makz a youtube video responding to that other video. Iz haz new song N everything! Rule Z world! W/Cheeseburgers!
2011-06-29 ShitFUCK: Zen we shaal take everything u ever vanted n 
2011-06-29 j@y!: Hey bitches, I just wanted to say that it's not fair that [Janelle Monae-The Archandroid@wiki] has not been posted as a review. It's not fair to the music artist work.
2011-06-29 j@y!: correction [Janelle Monae-The Archandroid review@wiki]
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: The Review bosses are busy. It's not like it won't get posted. We are training a new mod for it, so why don't you relax.
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Plus, bob's diner doesn't give a fuck
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: And for that matter, neither do I
2011-06-29 j@y!: Fuck you dumb bitch, gonna ban me? Oh wait, you can't! I was invited here so deal with it!
2011-06-29 j@y!: Sorry that was uncalled for...kinda *tucks claws* =p
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: I don't really care, I promise I won't go cry in a corner like *cough* some people *cough*
2011-06-29 j@y!: *Plays guitar* Any request to the lovely folks in bob's diner tonight?
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: *Snort* Ain't no one here but me.
2011-06-29 j@y!: Well do you have a request? OMG we could totally do a duet!
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Naw, I already wrote a song fer' today. Not one you'd fancy, either.
2011-06-29 j@y!: Ok well I would say it's a been pleasure, but that wouldn't be true! Have a good morning...kinda
2011-06-29 [Stephen]: Interesting. x)
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: I like having a fucked up morning, afternoon, evening and night. Heya, Sim baby!
2011-06-29 [Stephen]: Hahaha, hi there. xD
2011-06-29 [hedda]:: can you all please refrain from racist comments and cyber bullying


thanks/[guards@wiki]
2011-06-29 [Jewl]: oooooh naughty.
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: ...*eats ramen*...


13:20:31 (∞h ago) [Hedda]: You know, I've always really hated the Jews.
2011-06-29 [Nekko fox]: Racist comments on Bob's Diner? Cyber bullying?!


Not on here! Like failing English, that is simply unpossible.
2011-06-29 bin laden: میں ٹکڑے ٹکڑے کرنے کے لئے اپنی ویب سائٹ پر بم جا رہی ہوں
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: We know, [Hedda], we know. Calm down.


*[Hedda] goes into a violent rage and starts stuffing some Jewish customers into the oven, before realizing the oven is broken and sticking them into the washing machine instead. No, I'm not going to explain why a diner has a washing machine. Screw you.*
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: We know, bin laden, we know. Calm down.


*bin laden goes into a violent rage and starts stuffing some Jewish customers into the washing machine, before realizing the washing machine is broken and sticking them into the dish washer (named Pedro) instead. No, I'm not going to explain why a diner has a dish washer. Screw you.*
2011-06-29 [kians mummy]: strokes heddas head, its all ok






13:26:52(52s ago) [Hedda]: badabing bada BOOM!!
2011-06-29 [Nekko fox]: *Walks along, grinning at a camera trained on his face*


We here at Bob's Diner, we believe in good, wholesome family values. Right kids?


*He kneels beside two terrified and shivering children. He gets a faint chorus of "Yeah's" before stepping away from them. The little girl wets herself when she is no longer being recorded*


Yes, we hear at B's D believe in patriotism, fearing the one and only God, family, and the all-knowing government.


*A backdrop of an over-sized Soviet flag drops behind him for effect, orphans wiggling it at the corners to make it look like a breeze. They do a shoddy job of it and he considers not paying them. With that consideration in mind, he deems them unworthy of food OR pay. Lousy orphans*


Yes, hear at B's D, pride of Mother Russia and caterer to the working class and upper class alike, we believe not only in furthering ourselves, but our community. We believe...in YOU!


*He points dramatically at the camera. When the silently weeping orphan turns off the camera and takes out the tape to send in, Nekko lights a baby on fire and inhales its sweet fragrance*


Man, not going another five minutes without one of these again.
2011-06-29 nigger: I'M NOT RACIST, I JUST LOOK LIKE SHIT!!!
2011-06-29 [kians mummy]: bored
2011-06-29 [Nekko fox]: Apparently I'm racist! Huzzah!
2011-06-29 [Nekko fox]: And here I thought I was just rude.
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Quiet on set! We're preparing for another scene!


*nobody says nothing*


I SAID QUIET! *shoots an old lady eating a sandwich* There, much better. Action!


Yes, it's true. We do believe in you. You are valuable. You are important. You are refined. Here at Bob's Diner, we like to emulate our customers' grace, civility, and cleanliness, to make our customers feel like they're in a more comforting place. *stoops down and starts gently stroking a homeless leper's matted mane in the kitchen, while he croons*... *rats crawl out of his beard and drown in the soup he's stewing in*


Not only are we the cleanest restaurant in town, but we're also the only restaurant in town, meaning that we-


Wait, the teleprompter must be broken. What does that mean? I've never seen that before. WHAT DOES IT MEAN?! WHATEVER, WE'LL DO IT LIVE! FUCK IT! DO IT LIVE! FUCKING THING SUCKS! *takes off jacket in rage*
2011-06-29 [Alexi Ice]: Racist comments? LOL! Cyber bullying?


I think the saying is 'it you can't take the heat , stay out of the fire? ' isn't BD the place where we can pretty much do whatever the fuck we feel like?
2011-06-29 [Nekko fox]: *Pokes the teleprompter*


Mort, seems this thing is a toaster. It's also broken and full of beetles.


*shakes the teleprompter/toaster/beetle cache onto a fancily dressed couple who screech and claw out their own eyes. Turns out the beetles were made out of pepper and nightmares*
2011-06-29 [Avaz]: Speaking of which, who/where is Bob from whence the name of this wiki has come?
2011-06-29 [Thunder Cid]: On Mort's page.
2011-06-29 j@y!: Wow, Hedda actually came here and talked about cyber bullying and than left a prejudice comment? Weird bro! Anywayzille...I just wanted to give a shout out to cid and flisk for bein' amazing. Now I'm going to eat my words and try to swallow my pride for not being trusting...
2011-06-29 [Flisky]: We're amazing. ^_^


Thanks Jay! :)
2011-06-29 [American Revolutionary]: *tackles [Flisky] beatn him, herwith hi kar98 rifle, shouting "die jewish filth!!!!"*
2011-06-29 [Flisky]: *steps to the side, realizing what an idiot Scout Sniper is for trying to take out a Catholic Marine female* You're an idiot.
2011-06-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *is a Protestant Navy male and is offended for some reason*... *breaks a bottle over the table/into some kid's meal*... *it was a plastic bottle, so this wasn't an easy endeavor*... *stabs Flisky in the face with it, but it does nothing*... *goes back to reading the paper*...
2011-06-30 [Nekko fox]: Hey, where did my paper go? And who's Jay?
2011-06-30 [Avaz]: Who's gay?
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Silent Bob's friend?
2011-06-30 [Avaz]: Is this a question?
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Is that an answer?
2011-06-30 [Nekko fox]: YOU'RE ALL CRAZY! STAY AWAY FROM MAH BAY-BEE!


*Hugs a sack of potatoes. Hidden in the potatoes is a baby. It is also a potato*
2011-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: Psh
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from peeling a crying potato*
2011-06-30 [Stephen]: /lurks


You guys are funny. x)
2011-06-30 [Top_Hatter]: Hey, these fries look just like their mother, and hey! wow! ketchup on the inside! Neat!
2011-06-30 [Jewl]: *enjoys a good lurk occasionally*
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Good lurk with your lucking.
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You jerks that just started watching this wiki... go fan it, so we can beat the slave trade again.
2011-06-30 [Stephen]: *becomes a fan of the slave trade*
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *slowly reaches for his Stabbing Knife™ on the wall*
2011-06-30 [Stephen]: I want a trademarked stabbing knife!
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: So does your stomach! *kindly delivers one*


*takes your wallet for shipping and handling fees*
2011-06-30 [Stephen]: Owwwwwwwwwwwww. T__T
*gags and spits blood up all over Mort*
2011-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: Retaliate! Don't take that shit, Sim!!! Shoot him in the face!
2011-06-30 [Stephen]: But, I'm busy bleeding to death. D:
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SILK SHIRT!!


*punches [Top_Hatter]*
2011-06-30 [Lord Josmar]: My [Top_Hatter]!


*Punches [Silk_Shirt]*
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SILK_SHIR-


WAIT! Did you just hear that? *the diner goes completely silent*


Yup, it's as I feared. You have leeches in your brain. *takes out a rusty hacksaw, a stapler, and a hammer* Immediate surgery is required. *gets halfway through sawing [Lord Josmar]'s head open and gets bored*... *goes to play Mule Kong™ in Bob's Copyright Infringement Arcade Game Room and Erotic Sauna*...


Go, Maraschino! Jump that crate! Climb that escalator! Grab that baseball bat to smash the inexplicably rolling crates! Grab the woman of royalty! Oh no, Mule Kong has grabbed her and climbed up to the next level! *Nintendo's lawyers watch intently*
2011-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: O.o
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, take that, Donke-


*one of the lawyers starts taking out some court documents from his briefcase*


-I mean, Mule Kong. Yeah, Mule Kong. *smashes another crate with a baseball bat*


*the lawyer grumbles and steps back into the shadows*
2011-06-30 [Paul Doyle]: @[Avaz]: Perhaps "Bob" is a "chickenhead"? Perhaps this would explain all the grease and funkiness in Bob's diner food . . . just don't ask about what kind of grease it is :P
2011-06-30 [American Revolutionary]: *looks up at flisky,still dressed in nazi garb* nice sidestep..think you can teach me that move?
2011-06-30 [Avaz]: Paul, certainly. That explains everything! :P
2011-06-30 [Nekko fox]: *Turns on some music. It's the shrieking wails of one thousand women whose children died while eating at Bob's Diner, Infringement Arcade, Erotic Sauna, Restaurant, Recording Studio and Nursery*


We recorded them right here at B's D.I.A.E.S.R.R.S.N., put it on a continuous loop and fed it back to itself at twice the RPM!


*Several customers collapse, their ears bleeding. One man stands up and his head promptly explodes*


There are some minor, unnoticeable side-effects.


*the headless body of the man pays his check and leaves, placing a cap where his head once was*
2011-06-30 [Flisky]: *sidesteps away from Waffen's gaze*
2011-06-30 [American Revolutionary]: *sighs frustratedly and cleans kar 98 rifle* ich hatt ein komeraden
2011-06-30 j@y!: *walks in* So apparently I sang the blues to myself the other night, thanks ass hats for leaving bob's diner when I performed! *sigh* people these day's...
2011-06-30 [Top_Hatter]: Ideally, the blues are meant to be sung to yourself, for it is usually therapy for a wronged life, and if others so happen to hear it and enjoy it, that's a bonus...and more a bonus for those who were not here if your singing abilities are lacking *whistles and looks away*
2011-06-30 [Nekko fox]: *takes Waffen's gun and tosses it in with the rest of the soup. It blends nicely and gives it a very pleasant metalic sheen*
2011-06-30 [Alexi Ice]: *Orders the soup*
2011-06-30 [Imperator]: Ach! Dummkopf! You have vruined mein Juden suppe!
2011-06-30 [Nekko fox]: Sorry, I don't speak Japanese.


*Passes Alexi a bowl of Shut the Fuck Up (with extra cajun spice) and a coke*
2011-06-30 [Paul Doyle]: *Sings the Greens*
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Ringo jūsu! *stabs a passing pelican and tosses it into Alexi's soup*
2011-06-30 [Paul Doyle]: *tosses in some mysterious green nuggets*
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: MY NUGGETS!
2011-06-30 [Paul Doyle]: . . . courtesy of "Bob" the "chickenhead"??? o___O
2011-06-30 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I won't bob the chicken's head. They do that themselves.


*points at a pile of lifeless chickens, decomposing on the floor*
2011-06-30 [American Revolutionary]: ach mein karabine!!! du ist arschlock!!!!
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: Quiet Waffen! *Points at a sign that says 'NO JAPANESE TALKY TALKY'*
2011-07-01 [Lord Josmar]: *Several China-men look up from their Cream of Some Young Guy, but then realizing they don't speak Japanese, throw down a smoke bomb and ninja-vanish*
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: *Several Japanese look up and wonder when their culture was stolen. they each shed a single tear which is collected in a tiny bottle and sold as a cancer cure. Two people die of panaphylaxis before it comes off the shelves*
2011-07-01 [Flisky]: *gives the cancer cure to some cancer patients, they die of AIDS instead*
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: Well, would ya look at that.
2011-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *stares intently at that*
2011-07-01 [Lord Josmar]: *Watches as that does some awesome stunts involving a minibike, an ultra-lite, seventeen flaming bears on unicycles, and one pink flamingo*
2011-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY GOD!!! ...My popcorn is done! *takes it out of the microwave*


What'd I mis- OH MY GOD!!! ...I forgot the salt.


Now, what happened while I was awa- OH MY GOD!!! ...Would you look at the sodium content in this popcorn? Goodness, I don't need to add any salt.


Did I miss anything goo- OH MY GOD!!! ...My popcorn is still done!


*this continues on for several hours and the minibike/ultra-lite/flaming bears on unicycles/pink flamingo parade leaves without Mort ever knowing of its existence*
2011-07-01 [kians mummy]: says a good old lick to make it wet, it dribbles down my chin & when I think the time is right I stuff the f*cker in. Cadbury's creme egg, how do you eat yours?
2011-07-01 [kians mummy]: 1000 scousers where asked if they thought Britain should change its currency, 99% said no they where happy with the Giro!
2011-07-01 [American Revolutionary]: *continues to rant on in GERMAN* jawohl mien kommandant
2011-07-01 [Roma]: You're full of shit. Rainbow poptart kittens obviously fly. I ain't ever seen no rainbow on the ground.
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: Waffen, quit being French for one frickin' minute and let us discuss the ramifications implied by Roma's insightful note of felines composed of complex carbohydrates and sugars whilst airborne and emitting optical and meteorological phenomenon that causes a spectrum of light through the void and vacuum of space.


*Backhands Sammie h! with Mort's big toe, thoroughly destroying a city block in the process*


2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: So, cracking that joke..you stereotype that most percentage of Brits are on the giro..?
2011-07-01 [kians mummy]: its true though, as a lot of companys have gone bust due to the recession, so there for, people have gone on the dole
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: I blame the Black People. They are the root of the recession. They do nothing but bring the destruction of culture and civilization wherever they go.
2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Mmmm, that's not entirely correct. And I would know, seen as I am British. Your statistics are way off the mark. And, the recession has been a huge problem all over the place, and it's impact has been felt in many countries.


2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: [Nekko fox] You doggone racist you. Them blacks 'ain't the reason at all. We colored's are just fine..
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: What are you talking about? I'm talking about the Black People, the underground organization created to destabilize governments and topple civilization from within. They where black cloaks and hoods and where black facepaint and masks to hide their identity. Come on, Infinity, you should know this. You've been a member since '93.


*A couple of Black People look up from their plans for destroying the world and snarl at Sammie before sicking their doberman on her*
2011-07-01 [Pillowthief]: Was is dis? A nazi that doesnt want to be hated on?! Ironic! They should make a movie about you. Maybe a tragedy. With crumpets and tea.




I love crumpets. *tosses another Burger-ian into the soup*


Are you sure you're even German? For one, you stutter and your accent is horrible. You look like a guy I met in Iowa. I cant very well toss you in the soup if you're from Iowa. The Brits would be very displeased.
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: *Some Brits look up from their fish and chips soaked in vinegar with their side of spotted dick*
2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I'm confused. Happens a lot..
2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Not stereotypical one iota* As I would guess some of you yanks are not also :P
2011-07-01 [Roma]: I am jus' yer typical smert Amurican n' I kin say fore shore that them blacks IS the problim.


P.S. You could sell Sad-Tosser-From-Iowa Stew to anyone in NYC. One less hayseed? Let's slurp.
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: Iowa has had 24 of its citizens become astronauts, more than any other state in the U.S.


What about that state makes people want to flee the planet?
2011-07-01 [American Revolutionary]: ja im german, ach, mien head hurts, nicht danke *covers ears* ach!!!! that verdammt cat!!! *blows nyan cat to a million fluffy poptart bits* SEIG HEIL!!!!!
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: *Every fluffy poptart bit instantly transforms into a fully grown Nyan-Cat, nyaning through space and excreting effervescent glory to the world below*
2011-07-01 [American Revolutionary]: *shoots atthe fully grown nyan cat* HAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAx100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000"a's"
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: *The Nyan-Cat's Burst into x100000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 Nyan-Cats, full grown, flying, all shitting rainbows, and all...with Poptart bodies*
2011-07-01 [Stephen]: Nyan Cat is.. so, so horrible. *shivers*
2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]:
*Pops [Nekko fox] in the head with a cherry*


Take that and spread it on your pop tart's that shit rainbows..
2011-07-01 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Nyan Cat gives you diabetes.
2011-07-01 [Nekko fox]: *spreads the cherry on rainbow shitting poptarts and feeds it to his dog. The canine starts vibrating through the floor*
2011-07-01 [Imperator]: Am I the only one who actually enjoys Nyan Cat? I opened the Omega extended edition (3 1/2 hours) and before I knew it, 39 minutes had passed.
2011-07-02 [Nekko fox]: I downloaded it and set it to a continuous loop. It's been played 95 times.
2011-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I had a chip installed/hammered into the base of my skull that connects with my brain stem and transmits a constant Nyan Cat broadcast 24/7 into my mind. It makes life hard. I can't drive, I can't focus, I can't focus, I can't concentrate, I can't focus, my memory is bad, my focus is concentrate, my cat is drive, my Nyan is Nyan, Nyan Nyan is Cat, Cat Nyan Nyan Nyan, Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan, Nyan Nyan Nyan Nyan... *starts staggering toward a group of confused onlookers and begins eating one of their brains*... *the confused onlookers start clapping like usual*...
2011-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *one of a rainbow poptart kitten's kittens is born with a genetic mutation, making it a new breed of kitten; a rainbow toaster strudel kitten*... *scientists spend hundreds of billions studying this new species*... *children in Africa continue to starve*...
2011-07-02 [Pillowthief]: *looks up from his plate of Nyan Cat* Mmhhghnyan cuut guvs yough DIAUGHBITTYS??!!
2011-07-02 [Sunrose]: @Waffen dude: Your German sucks so bad haha..
2011-07-02 [Thunder Cid]: Sunny every one knows that waterhead German is in now. It's what all the cool wannabe neo-Nazi's are doing.
2011-07-02 [Nekko fox]: No kidding! All the cool kids and scoundrels are becoming schutzstaffel carbon-copy lookalikes! All you need to do is use intermittent German (butchered), make Hitler references (also butchered) and goose-step a few times (butcher your own leg).


Instant win.
2011-07-03 Jesus: I personally know Hitler. He would not approve of this.
2011-07-03 [Pillowthief]: Quiet you hippy!
2011-07-03 j@y!: Thanks guys for being so awesome! I'm exiting Elftown now so just wanted to say bye! *waves hand* Stay awesome and keep this wiki thriving because people enjoy it. Peace + Love!


-Mystin 04'-11'
2011-07-03 [Thunder Cid]: Oh boy aren't Jewish people just nifty.
2011-07-03 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I thought they were thrifty?
2011-07-03 [Thunder Cid]: Oh yes that makes them nifty.
2011-07-03 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Imagines a nifty, thrifty Jew, shopping in Sainsburies*
2011-07-03 Jesus: So- what do you call a Jew thats a pro- golfer?














Jewish, you racist bastards.
2011-07-03 [Jewl]: ^ You have "Cooked Sushi" on the menu twice...
2011-07-03 [Nekko fox]: That's because there are two forms of Cooked Sushi. The Cooked Sushi and the Uncooked Cooked Sushi. We left it out as a surprise for whoever order it.


*And man topples over, clutching his throat and gurgling about Red Tide poisoning*


Send all complaints to our complaints department.


*Indicates a machine that is punching smiley faces into grievance papers filed against Bob's Diner before mailing them back to the senders with an envelope with a similar smiley face ink-printed on the front with the words "Grow Up and Deal With It" on the back*
2011-07-03 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: All the sushi I buy is precooked-because you kinda don't get pink prawns etc :P
2011-07-03 [Thunder Cid]:   
2011-07-03 [Thrice]: LOL
2011-07-03 [kians mummy]: ha ha, i like that
2011-07-03 [Jewl]: Awesome
2011-07-03 [Jewl]:   
2011-07-03 [Nekko fox]: Wait, when did we get a full bar?


*Looks up from the hundreds of bottles he's been peeing into before lining on the wall behind a fancy oak counter labeled "Bar"*
2011-07-04 Jesus: You do that one at a time? I have a whole canning facility to do that for me, since of course, Im Jesus. I call it, Mt Dew... Catchy eh? Makes me feel like Ive just come down the mountain to piss in your face. Ah, such a lovely feeling. Every once in a while, Ive found that if I twist my nipple, a new flavor comes out. Sweet huh? I bet you wish you could do that.
2011-07-04 [Pillowthief]: I drink it every day, Jesus.
2011-07-04 God: Help me lord for I have fucked a sheep and left it to die with its head stuck in a fence.................................


Oh I forgot, i am god
2011-07-04 jesus: Farther i told you not to Fuck sheep anymore, Mums jealous
2011-07-04 Jesus: Stop that Holy Ghost. You do a horrible impression of me and we all know it's you. Dad, that joke isn't funny anymore. We're asexual, remember? (crap, how do I take my own name in vain without sounding narcissistic?)
2011-07-04 [Pillowthief]: Whoa, whoa. Jesus, surely we can stop all of this family bickering...?
2011-07-04 Jesus: Hey! I've told you before- stop calling me Shirley!
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: No, Jesus, your father had your name legally changed to Shirley Christ of Nazareth.


*Holds up the notated documents with God's seal of approval and a picture of Satan giving a thumbs up*
2011-07-04 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: You know, your brother was just as bad. I don't know, kids! *Grounds Jesus for staying out in the sun too long and getting burned*
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: *Beats Jesus using a combination of Mort and Infinity tied together as nun-chucks. As an after thought, he chucks some nuns at Jesus too*
2011-07-04 [Roma]: -Calls Thor-


Thor... sup... I've got a guy for you. Yeah, I'll bring the nails, just get your hammer and get over here.
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: *Hangs up the phone and walks back into room, chuckling*


Hey guys, I just tricked this person into thinking I was Thor and was coming over to nail someone to something.


*Everyone at Robert's Delicatessen laugh jovially*


Well, I need to get back to work.


*Walks back to Bob's Diner after locking the doors to Robert's Delicatessen, barricading the windows and setting the whole place on fire*


We don't need any competition around here...
2011-07-04 Jesus: I circumstised [@92105] in his sleep lol, he took it well, apart from the accidental thing that i did, chopped his hole dick off.
2011-07-04 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I have already been circumsized..
2011-07-04 [@1]: [bob's diner@wiki] is currently under investigation and may be deleted by the [guards@wiki] due to racist remarks, and abusive behavour, further more, the creaters may be banned.


/[mayor@wiki]Missing: 
2011-07-04 [@1]: [@1]: [bob's diner@wiki] is currently under investigation and may be deleted by the [guards@wiki] due to racist remarks, and abusive behavour, further more, the creaters may be banned.


/[mayor@wiki]
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: Somehow...I dont think that was actually hedda.
2011-07-04 [@1]: I can't log on
2011-07-04 porn: 
2011-07-04 [kians mummy]: Please delete the previous comment, its innapropriate for Elftown otherwise I will report it to the guards
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: Unfortunatly I think Turkey is the only one who can do so.
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: If anyone can get a hold of either Mort or Turkey off of ET it would be helpful.
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: B
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: U
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: M
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: P
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: P
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: I
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: T
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: Y
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: AH A PENIS!!!! IT BURNS! *melts into a puddle of sugary vitamin water*
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: I swear to God if it moves I'll shoot that thing off!!!!


  

2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: If you wanna se a picture of a horny guy getting some penetration, then here you go!
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: GET IT!? Horny guy: the bull! Getting some penetration: his horn in the guys leg!
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: DUDE TAKE THAT OFF IT'S MAKING ME SICK! And I'm not talking about the penis!
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Why...
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: Lolz. Its an epic pic!
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Isn't
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: it
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: going
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: away?!
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: And I dont mean the penis...
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
MAKE
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
THE
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
PENIS
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
GO
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
AWAY!!!!!!!!
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
DO IT FOR THE CHILDREN!!!!!!!!!!!!!


  

2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
  





  

2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]:   


PET DA KITTEH GURLS NAOW.
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: I also found a picture of Misty when she was going through her angsty teen years.


  

2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: Also, Sammie H, you need to grow up and deal with it. A single penis and you flip out? What are you, eight? Pfft, everyone knows the internet is for porn. There is even showtune proving it!


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W31ue-9u4z4&feature=related



  

2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
OMG!!!!!!


  

2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]:   




Besides, if I can have a wiki page DEVOTED TO ADULT-ORIENTED FURRY PICTURES COMPLETE WITH SEXUAL CONTENT, and the only things the guards asked me to do is to password it...


Well, I guess it kinda shoots your close-minded views down.


2011-07-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, but I don't like the guy from the pic.
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]:


*takes Sammie H's soap box and tosses it into the incinerator along with the rest of her belongings to fuel the soup concoction that has been boilking for close to three months now and resembles something a feline would regurgitate*
2011-07-04 [Lord Josmar]: You got rid of all my pretty pics though....
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: Back on topic, I think we really should clean up Bob's Diner. There is a lot happening here lately that has never happened before, or rarely ever happens and I think that we need to take strides to remove the bottom dregs of ET society.


*Gets a broom and starts pushing Sammie and Misty out the door, whistling gently and then shutting the door. He then tosses the broom into the soup*


Now, what was the purpose of all of this?
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: Oh yeah, cleaning.


*Starts pouring kerosene on everything, including the soup, the customers, and the bar*


Wait...does Mort have the insurance on this place up to date?
2011-07-04 [Nekko fox]: *Scratches on the wall above the oven while contemplating about Sammie H's apparent disgruntled attitude about Bob's Diner and it's content, but keeps coming back*


Seems rather uppity for a new kid....


*He mixes some of the scraped off gunk into the soup. It boils and sizzles violently*


HE! Don't talk back to me you pretentious bitch!


*Kicks the oven which promptly regurgitates the dozen or so Jews Mort had forced into it a few months back. They all look rather disgruntled and singed around the edges*
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper to see a penis, a Misty, and a Sammie h*


*silently returns to his newspaper, except, of course, all the screams and stuff, but it's otherwise silent*
2011-07-05 [Pillowthief]: My soup! *imagines the rainforest being saved by Misty1's fuzzy eyebrows*
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *one of Misty's eyebrows crawls away and start forming a cocoon on the soup ladle*
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SOUP LADLE!!


*the soup ladle is clearly labeled "Property of Nekko Fox"*
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: MY LABEL MAKER!!


*the label maker, having labeled everything but itself, is claimed by Mort, who hoards it in his cave with other unlabeled items he snatches from time to time, like that used band-aid, The Scream, unlabeled labels (the taking of which frees the item they are labeling from being labeled and makes it available for thievery according to the rules set forth by the Geneva Convention), and that guy's hip bone*
2011-07-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *walks in* Hey what did I miss? *sees soup/eyebrow/label maker fiasco* Hmmmm Nekko's cleaning. Must be inspection day
2011-07-05 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from the butane torch he was using to free his labelled ladle from the tyranny and horror of the rule of the Misty Eyebrow Caterpillar Dictators Committee*


We have inspections here?


*A skeleton burbles up from the depths of the soup, wearing a cheap brown suit a nametag (partially melted) that read "Health Inspector"*
2011-07-05 [Top_Hatter]: *attempts ridiculously large mustache-fake inspector impersonation* Ah, yes..."Bob's Diner" *Sarcastically complimenting in a superior and snooty manner*...We've had several...*ahem* remarks about this "lovely" place. It seems to me that so many people must enjoy vomiting as a hobby to continually frequent this holy grail of unholy gruel...*pauses to adjust the mustache*...Quickly now, do you have my annual bribe, or do I REALLY have to examine this garbage repository? *Glares at the already 400+ discrepancies taking place*
2011-07-05 God: I hate [Bob's diner@wiki] being called lovely as its not ment to be, it is ment to be horrible, just like the owner.


*bashes [@189227] on there head with a spiked baseball bat*
2011-07-05 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Rolls over on roller boots, and a tail, carrying two trays of rotten, putrid octopus tentacles. One of the legs falls to the side, and wraps itself around the hapless waitress*
2011-07-05 [kians mummy]: ouch
2011-07-05 [Top_Hatter]: 0_x ...ow! Bloody Hell! Bugger me you wanking tosser, that hurt! What a shmeg! did you not realize I was being sarcastic? *throws fake mustache at [God]* ...friggin lunatic left me so flustered I can't even properly grammarize correctly... *contemplates where God got the nails for his bat*
2011-07-05 [American Revolutionary]: *has been dumbstruck and whispers to himself giving the nazi salute*
2011-07-05 [Pillowthief]: Looks like he's not very good at English either, [Sunrose]...    :(    Maybe he's Canadian?
2011-07-05 [Nekko fox]: *Prods Waffen in the face with the now-aflame labeled ladle*


Quiet with your Gaelic language over there, we don't need another reason for Sammie H to go on another one of her white-knighty, preachy, pompous, soap-box rants again.


*Prods Pillow in the spleen with the still-aflame labeled ladle*


Quiet with your reference to those Child-Molesting, Brothel-Funding Canucks, we don't need another reason to invade those maple-syrup swilling, moose-humping Canadians.
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *some Canadians look up from their moose orgy*


"Eh?"
2011-07-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Cut! Ok people (and I use the term "people" loosely) from the top and this is the last time we're filming this scene. I've got the Mexicans coming in an hour with the donkey. Hey, there's a market for everything
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *some Mexicans look up from their donkey orgy*


"Que?"
2011-07-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Well, I guess the secrets out about the sauce
2011-07-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Not necessarily. It may not be out yet, so th-


*Mexicans start cheering*


Nevermind, it's out now.
2011-07-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Oh well fuck it (not really) we got it on film, so that's a wrap. Tequila or whatever that tequila colored liquid on the bar is for everybody!
2011-07-05 [Jewl]: <.<
2011-07-05 [Jewl]: *sniffs* Smells like paint thinner.
2011-07-05 [Lord Josmar]: Thats perfect! It should clear out all the paint I ate the other day!


...Stupid "Soup of the Day".
2011-07-05 [Flisky]: So that's where I left my paint. Thanks Jos.
2011-07-05 [Top_Hatter]: That's not paint thinner...it's chloroform 0_o ...um, anybody want this unconscious [Jewl]?...no? *places [Jewl] on the floor and surrounds her outline in empty "beer?" bottles*
2011-07-05 [Nekko fox]: *Tapes [Jewl] to the floor and writes obscene things on their person, then starts stacking movie cases and the discarded personal belongings of customers long past upon her*
2011-07-05 [Lord Josmar]: *Starts removing movie cases and the discarded personal belongings of customers long past from atop [Jewl] and putting them back in the pile next to [Nekko fox].*
2011-07-05 [Flisky]: *starts removing [Nekko fox]s and discarded personal belongings of customers long past and stacks them atop [Lord Josmar]*
2011-07-05 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I want to be stacked upon! *Cries and stomps feet*
2011-07-05 [Lord Josmar]: *Reaches out from under pile of discarded belongings and takes [9jlriexqk,ktpk]'s feet and then stacks them on top of her.*
2011-07-05 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Now what is the point of that? I want a big ol' wardrobe stacked on top of me-iron those kinks out!
2011-07-05 [Flisky]: *finds the wardrobe full of orphans and stacks upon [9jlriexqk,ktpk]*
2011-07-05 [Lord Josmar]: *Takes the feet that were originally stacked on Infinity and puts them on top of the wardrobe. Then puts some iron-on kinks on top of the feet.*
2011-07-06 [Nekko fox]: *Is well stacked*


Shit is so cash.
2011-07-06 [Pillowthief]: She is well stacked. *thumbs up*
2011-07-06 j@y!: Hey this is a little messages to my friend Alexi in regards to my friends 'review' that you say isn't a review. I'm actually talking to her on the phone right now & I find it completely idiotic that you will not accept her review because it doesn't fit into a category. With that said, I will be letting [@1] know my thoughts and concerns on this issue as I have his e-mail! Thank you and good day to you!
2011-07-06 [Lord Josmar]: *Takes Hedda's email and throws it into the fryer where it immediately catches fire....the fryer, not the email.*


Damnit! I thought I ordered the email proof fryers!


*Throws an orphan at the stove which promptly catches on fire...the orphan, not the stove.*


Damnit! I thought I ordered the stove proof orphans!
2011-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts loading the orphans back onto the crate*


You've still got your receipt from Wal-Mart, right?
2011-07-06 [Lord Josmar]: Of course! I know the rules.


*Picks up shotgun and ski mask, both labeled "receipt". Puts on ski mask*


Argh! This ski mask is all itchy! I'm going to return this too when we get there.
2011-07-06 [Pillowthief]: Who the bloody hell is 'j at y!' and why are they yelling for no apparent reason? And who is Alexi and why would we care about a review that isn't a review? And why do hotdog buns get sold in packages of 8 when hotdogs get sold in packages of 10?!? DOES THIS LOOK INFECTED TO YOU?!?!?
2011-07-06 j@y!: 
2011-07-06 [American Revolutionary]: NIEN!!!!!!!! ACH ZU KARABINE!!!! HIEL!!!! SIEG HEIL!!!!!!!
2011-07-06 Lee Evans: What the fuck is this, Bob's diner, what the hell, a urine drink, thats groce, i drink my own piss but not somebody elses, ewww
2011-07-06 Peter Pan: come fly with me, lets fly, lets fly away, aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh shittttt, *hits the twin towers*Missing: 
2011-07-06 [Nekko fox]: Oh Lee Evans, you're such a card.


*The card reads "Please Donate To The Illiteracy Fund" and has a little cup of changed attached for donations*


Besides, we here at Bob's Diner get all of our piss pre-bottled from Wal-Mart. It's simply more efficient that way.
2011-07-06 [Lord Josmar]: *Stops drinking his bottle of Target urine and looks around before hiding the bottle.* Yea [Mystin] *cough* I mean Jay, god, jesus, Hedda, Peter Pan, Lee Evans.
2011-07-06 [Roma]: Lee Evans: ...that's groce..."


You were close. I've definitely seen Bob's Diner Urine Soda at my local grocer.
2011-07-06 Jesus: They come in grosses now? Im going to have to speed up my net production.
2011-07-06 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: They milk it from me..
2011-07-06 [Roma]: Well if you've got to urinate already, there shouldn't be much milking involved. And if there IS, then that explains the floaties.
2011-07-06 Jesus: Ah, yes. This will do nicely to meet my quotas. *Begins milking [@187190]'s hairy-boobie-face*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Edit. It would just be easier to say I don't give a fuck and be done with it.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: What!? I am gone all day and there are only two new comments! At this rate we will never meet our quota by the end of the friscal period!


*Picks up TV and throws it into a blue ringed portal under a orange ringed portal. It never stops falling.*
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Edit: Oh no you don't, [Alexi Ice]. We don't take too kindly to comment editing 'round here. I believe you said:
________________


"01:47:16 (28min ago) [Alexi Ice]: (18h ago) j@y!: Hey this is a little messages to my friend Alexi in regards to my friends 'review' that you say isn't a review. I'm actually talking to her on the phone right now & I find it completely idiotic that you will not accept her review because it doesn't fit into a category. With that said, I will be letting [Hedda] know my thoughts and concerns on this issue as I have his e-mail! Thank you and good day to you!


-------------------------------------------------------


1. ) I ain't yer' friend


2. ) Will never BE your friend


3. ) Pretty sure you don't know what yer' talkin' bout' either, so you might wanna' understand before making yourself look like more of an ass.


4. ) Wait...too late."
________________


Your first two points are inconsequential, as they are a response to obvious sarcasm. Plus, at one point in time, you technically were his friend/relation, invalidating your second point completely. Your third point is merely a conjecture and your fourth is circumstantial based on your third. Therefore, I deem your entire response to be invalid and I rule in favor of the defendant and find you guilty of love in the first degree. *Bananarama starts singing, but is promptly shot by the bailiff* Thank you, Clyde. You are hereby ordered to pay the defendant's court fees and receive no less than 4,000 years in a maximum security prison located in the center of a semi-active volcano with no possibility of parole. *bangs gavel down on a cockroach*


Next case! *the bailiff drags Tiny Tim in in shackles*


So, I understand you ate my sandwich...? *Tiny Tim sobs uncontrollably, while the bailiff, foreseeing the inevitable verdict, starts prepping the guillotine*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: But I like my 'I don't give a fuck' comment better O.o
2011-07-07 j@y!: Epic WIN! *strip dances on the table*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   


Jeasus doesn't give a fuck either! <3
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Oh, my fifth point was 5. )Anyone wanna' guess how much I don't care? O.o
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Make more comments Jos!
2011-07-07 j@y!: Lucky for you I can spell Jesus! o.O
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Antisaint!


Burn the evidence.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: Order coming up!


*Jumps back into the kitchen and starts making comments before putting them on trays and force feeding them to the customers.*


YOU WILL TAKE THIS COMMENT WITH THE PICTURE OF A KITTEN LOOKING DOWN THE SCOPE OF A SNIPER RIFLE AND YOU WILL EAT IT AND LIKE IT!
2011-07-07 j@y!: By the way Lord Josmar, if that is your real name!!! I never said I was scared or hiding my true identity! So there. & F U Alexi for doing what you did to [@21418] F U to Hell!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: That photograph of Jesus/Jeasus has clearly been shooped.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
FYI
2011-07-07 [Sideways]: *Falls through the rotted cieling at terminal velocity, splatting onto a table seating a party of 12 Mexicans and their cockroach fajita combo platter* a moment later a full parachute deploys and covers the crushed beaners*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Really Mort? I didn't know that ! u iz so smartical.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: Nor did I say you were scared to expose your true identity.


  

2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Mystin - again, you have no idea what your talking about. Besides, I'd love to be in hell! Me and Satan would rule the world!
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: Wait!...777 is the beginning of all the phone numbers in a town near here....
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The proper spelling is 'smarticle'. Moron.


It's like 'particle', except not at all.
2011-07-07 j@y!: You dick! I was enjoying my roach infested fajitas!!! *throws a sopapilla at [@181888]*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   


  

2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@64936]...WTF?!
2011-07-07 [Sideways]: A large banner with the words" Mystin for President of Douchebagizstan 2012" printed on it in huge rainbow letters flutters through the new sunroof *
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I'm pretty sure there is no proper spelling of that word? O.o
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Rule Ze world!
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: o.o'
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: Damn skippy [@181888], where can I sign up to vote for the douche canoe?
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@64936], why don't you walk around Texas and tell people your feelings so I can grab some popcorn and enjoy watching you get your ass handed to you?! I think it would be epic!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The proper spelling is 'worlad'. Moron.


It's like 'NORAD', except not at all.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   


Now on the Xbox 180!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   


  



  



2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I vould not vant to do such a thing. For me being honest would mean death to the masses! <3
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Sideways]: Suddenly a deluge of church protests signs fall through the cielling. Each reads "GOD HATES FAGS " but FAGS is crossed out and replaced with "Mystin"
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I think your a fucktard O.o But that's just me (and [Sideways]
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: LOL! Jos, epic!
2011-07-07 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: 
2011-07-07 j@y!: *takes the God hates Mystin sign and beats [@181888] in the head with it* Anyone else have something to say? Bring it!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Mystin - Failing at creativity - All over the world
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@64936] 
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   


  



  

2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: ...I hate you now Alexi...
lolz
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Mystin - failing at wit - All over the world
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: 
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: <3 Hugs!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Nazi Raptormind?
2011-07-07 Jesus: I do believe that Im not enjoying this comment cascade. Therefor, I have concluded that J at Y! needs to burn in hell for close to an infinite time for "leaving" elftown (who were you again?) when they didn't really leave elftown, and have actually contributed more towards the fiscal year comment count than they ever did when they were actually a part of it.


That, is the essence of Fail.


But not to worry! When you actually do get tired of checking your non-elftown account and leave this place for good (again), we will make sure you are ridiculed for things that you could not possibly have done and make sarcastic comments in your general direction. Like any good christian would do.
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: Mystin is that dramaqueen who was banned for harassing people in his outspoken, dramatic "LISTEN TO ME" way, right? o3o
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: 
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Basically, Sim-Sim! For the good of 'the people'z
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: 
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Lol, Jos
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: o___O''


As of right now:


Alexi Ice (Could you control me?) 
Was last seen 30 minutes ago.
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@153213] - PERFECTLY SAID! *hands you monopoly money* Don't spend it all in one place!
2011-07-07 ShitFUCK: Hey mystin; Ever seen delivernce?
2011-07-07 Jesus: Why are you asking me?! I dont pay enough attention to be able to tell you all apart.


NOW GET BACK TO WORK! *the mt dew factory once again begins operations*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I like being invisible! SUCK IT! <3
2011-07-07 j@y!: No, but use spell check bro!
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: Mountain Dew is good. =)


And, Alexi just disappeared from my online friend list.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 Jesus: Wow, that comment was not supposed to go there...
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Lol
2011-07-07 ShitFUCK: Make me.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: ST for the win!
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: By the way, on [@58061]'s defense, how many of you ass hats have a centipede badge? Mindless drones *rolls eyes*
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: This wiki has too many comments.
LF> Delete all comments button


;o)
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Yay! I'm now Turkey's whore! <3 <3
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, [Stephen], meaning she hasn't left B's D this entire time to refresh her page and that sh-


Hey, wait! I sentenced you to 4,000 years of jail/sodomy! *the bailiff quick draws his taser and shoots [~Crimson Angel~] in the testicles*... *the entire courtroom gives a standing ovation sitting down and passive aggressively demands an encore*... *Clyde shoots [~Crimson Angel~] once more*...
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Sim-sim does O.o That doesn't defend you in any way. Yer' still a narcissistic little S.O.B.
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: I don't know if I was called an asshat, but I have a Centipedes badge, not that badges really matter. o.o
2011-07-07 ShitFUCK: Dumbass mother fucker
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: And as soon as my graphics get approved then I will too.



2011-07-07 j@y!: They matter to me!!!! *starts breaking shit in bob's diner*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: There ain't nuffin' to break
2011-07-07 j@y!: At least I can spell you twit!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SHIT!!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: 
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Mystin - Still failing at creativity - All over the world
2011-07-07 j@y!: *breaks [@64936] face* Ha! I found something, rather someone. *girl in chat screams reported!* FUCK YOU!!!!
2011-07-07 ShitFUCK: Vy don't u go fornicate vith an iron lung? Eh?
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: This j@y! person seems really hostile towards Alexi. I can't imagine why, she's really friendly. o3o
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   





  







2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: 
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@153213], she got my friends [@58061] & [@156000] banned and the took down my friends review cause it didn't fit in a category. Retire this jerk face!!!
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: It's ok, none of what he says makes any sense O.o So I just tune him out
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: You are Mystin and Lyre O.o And again, with the reviews thing


Why you talkie when u no kno what u talkie bout?
2011-07-07 j@y!: Aww...she tuned me out!!! Like I give a damn. Cyber bully me bitch, do it till the cows come home!!!! NOW!!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: Seeing as she's not a Guard, I don't see how she directly can place a banning; 'sides, I know from experience that the Guards won't ban without cause. Elf12 has had members on it that we've wanted to ban, but we don't because we don't have cause. (Other than Turkey, he's just that special to be banned for existing.) xD
2011-07-07 [Sideways]: You can spell, Mystin. You can spell a bunch of mindless, stupid bullshit-- *Coughs out a Mexican's scalp* here, please proofreader this sentance for me: nubuddy lykes Mystin ore his dumbfuck openonions. Mystin iz two retarted too relize nobody caires abut him.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 ShitFUCK: Zis kid should die
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: 
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I iz magik, I iz do stuff they no kno I iz capable of doing! (It's Satan, I tell you! SATAN!)
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: [@181888] is just mad because I deleted his little graphic for his little nonsensical wiki. Sorry bro, it happens. @ [@64936], Ian [@156000] called you a bitch, I say you got off easy there. @ShitFUCK please don't make reveal [@64936] clone account...
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Got off easy there O.o Again, what u no say makes no sense
2011-07-07 ShitFUCK: Eat me, dumbass
2011-07-07 j@y!: [@21418] should kick your ass for removing her review. I'm sorry if didn't fit into your little circle of reviews. I've been her friend longer than anyone else, so excuse me for standing up for my friend. I see all......more so when I'm banned...funny right?!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-07-07 j@y!: Does anyone want to talk to [@191596], I have some interesting facts about this Elftowner you might want to hear?
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: U still no know wut u talking bout' sowwie I no speak stoopid
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: You know, when copying comments from a wiki to a Word document, it's fairly annoying to have to copy each picture individually and then re-size them accordingly. And it's exceedingly irksome when there's a large amount of them (particularly ones everyone has seen before and others that are just not funny) in great frequency without cause or purpose that only serves to take away from typical witty conversations and drunken rants among regulars.


  

2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: 
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I luvz pictures!!!!
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@92105] no worries, I'll keep our little affair private. I won't tell my boyfriend, if you don't tell yours.
2011-07-07 [Sideways]: Mystin, you have no idea how little I give a fuck. You are so pathetic. You are so delusional. You are a powerless, thoughtless little clown. You should quit while B'sD is still pulling punches. *Slithers his now boneless crushed body off the table and begins stapling pictures of mystin sodomizing children to customer's faces.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: Ok, last one.



2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: O.o You just called Mort Gay. Thatz not nice
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: OMG! PUPPIES!!!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: It's not an affair if neither of us are married! ;D


Wait, no. It's not an affair period. Hmm...
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: Poor Mort. xD
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Turkey will be so jealous O.o
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Do you really copy paste all these messages??? ! That's a whole lot!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE a whole lot.


I had them all copied up 'til 2009, but the CD the file was on got overwritten, so now I have to download something to recover it and blah blah with the budget...


*goes back to reading the paper*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Why do u threaten people when u no have no idea wut u talk about? do it make uz feel like big manz? Do it make u feelz less stoopid? I twi too cunnicate in wayz u understandz but u still sound stoopid
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Good god why??? Do you go back and read em' later? O.o
2011-07-07 [Lithium Lullaby]: jay...stop...you're only making things worse for yourself...
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz


Bob's diner just died! Comment wars FUCK THE WORLD!
2011-07-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: *raises a finger to make a point, but, in a series of hilariously unfortunate events, somehow ends up getting arrested on molestation charges*
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: He uses them to blackmail council votes.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Hm, Jos?
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I've read all these comments at least... twice? More, depending on the comment. They'd make for a fun, potential lawsuit ridden book.
2011-07-07 j@y!: blah blah blah!!!
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: That too.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: That's true, but who in the world would want to go through them all just to charge us all for racissum? And sexisum...and prejudice and hate crimes and..hmmm...What else?
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@181888] if you just ask nicely, I'll give you meaningless graphic back...jeez...
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Lying, too, but is that really a crime? You kind of have to be good at it to get anything out of it anyway
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I can assure you, Jay, Sideways doesn't care.
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: Blasphemy. Dont forget that.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Oh yeah! My favorite!! Where's the sodomy when you need it?
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The government. And the NAACP. And NASA. *points at a stolen lunar lander that some big lipped, wide nostriled, nappy headed black kids are playing on*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: LOL! Double comment fuck the world
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: We've suddenly gotten a new watcher in the last 10 minutes.
2011-07-07 j@y!: By the way Mort, would you be so kind as to tell my beautiful friend [@64936] that every comment posted on Bob's Diner is counted, than used to experimental treatment?
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: *Sings* Your a liar, your a cheater, your a fool!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: U still make no sense
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Every comment posted on Bob's Diner is counted, than used to experimental treatment.


Apparently.
2011-07-07 j@y!: Your right, your not beautiful... your mouth dropping, ball spinning, eyebrow raising, prettyfull!
2011-07-07 j@y!: LMAO, WIN!!!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: What does 'to experimental treatment' mean O.o
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Why u no speak ze Engrish?
2011-07-07 [Sideways]: Okay Mystin, you got a deal. Will you please, pretty please, go fuck yourself with a branding iron? Oh wait, *rereads Mystin's troll account's last post* wait... Oh...! No, fuck you and your graphic.
2011-07-07 j@y!: alexi xarzith ui vi vorel rekisix di wer dinosaurs mrith vi turalisj fothisev gliiwr di thric ulhyrri
2011-07-07 j@y!: @ [@181888].....ouch! Fine, you can't have my graphic anyway! *sticks tongue out and dances on a poll*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Google translate thinks you're an idiot
2011-07-07 j@y!: Ha! You can't find it!
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Keep this petty squabbling up, we need the comments.


As for me, I'm off to do something not stupid. *grabs 15 beers, a can of gasoline, a box of matches, a potato launcher, a roll of condoms, and a flare gun, before jumping into his truck and swerving down the highway into oncoming traffic*
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: Wow, all this must be sending Mort's comment count through the roof. xD
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: It's French, but you spelled three of the words wrong
2011-07-07 j@y!: I though our 'affair' was over...>.>
2011-07-07 j@y!: It is not french!!! Your all wet......ew maybe not.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: *Takes a drag*
2011-07-07 [Flisky]: ...I hate to add to all this wonderful squabbling...but everyone please use 'you're' instead of 'your' in those sentences. Then they would make much more sense to the literal minded. *goes back into small corner and continues to read the weeks old newspaper*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: NEVER!!! Mostly because I ish communicating w. non-smartical people
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: YE-HAW! USA USA USA!!


*drives through a hospital, taking out many, many people in wheelchairs* I DON'T BRAKE FOR CYCLISTS!!


*ramps out the back entrance, as the entire building explodes behind*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Smartical is like particle. Except not. You know?
2011-07-07 j@y!: Yeah...I'm out for now. *Waves goodbye and eats the God hates fags, sorry God hates Mystin sign that [@59031] gave me* I love the taste of pasty paper. Yum.........Later tator! Peace!!!!!!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Cyclists. lol
2011-07-07 Jesus: J at Y!, I believe I had banished you to the utter pits of hell. Im pretty sure I did. Why did- ah, no batteries. Who's got some batteries? And Alex, you just plain talk too much. Stop acting like n00bs!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Why u pick on Flisky? She no do nuffin'
2011-07-07 j@y!: You totally misread that message!!! You're a moron.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: But I'm contributing. Lol. To the comments! So I've decided to make as many annoying, stupid, self indulgent comments as I can! Buahahaha!
2011-07-07 j@y!: I WILL NOT DIE. EVER. NOPE.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Because
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: CAN!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Buahahahahahahaha!
2011-07-07 j@y!: Shut
2011-07-07 j@y!: The
2011-07-07 j@y!: Hell
2011-07-07 j@y!: Up
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: UP
2011-07-07 j@y!: Ha! Ha! Ha!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: You're a moron *flippant hand flip* Moron....moron...moron....*Echos into the empty ears of BD (Which I am still convinced is a disease)
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Moron
2011-07-07 j@y!: Grr......I thought you were on a venture of greatness?!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Moron
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: *Still echoing*
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: AH, you beat me.


No, seriously. You beat me. *points J at Y! out to a police officer, who promptly quick draws his taser and shoots [~Crimson Angel~] in the testicles again*


(But seriously. Domestic abuse is no laughing matter. For less information, please go to domestic abuse support service.)
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Echoing
2011-07-07 j@y!: I would rather be a moron than a mormon like you!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: What's J at Y anyway
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Way to be clever *claps* I concede you iz the smartest idiot alive.
2011-07-07 j@y!: Oh I'm sorry [@88645], didn't mean for you to get tased on my account!!! *runs out of bob's diner*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: *Still echoing*
2011-07-07 [Pillowthief]: You guys are all gay. Except Sunrose- she might just be bi.


Anyways, youre all boring me, so peace biotches! Me and Jesus are going to take a vacation from this incessant squabbling and troll 4chan for a while. Maybe a long while.


(And for those that dont pay attention- "J at Y!" = "J @ Y!". Simply elementary, my dear)
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Jesus kills a fig tree*


Cut that out!!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: Cuz there is no squabbling on 4chan! No, never!
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I wish Dexter were here
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I SAID GO TO domestic abuse support service FOR LESS INFORMATION. *starts furiously slapping Dexter and makes a mess of his lab*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I can't do a good Dexter accent. Darn.
2011-07-07 [Pillowthief]: Congrats goes to Mort and Jesus (who apparently has a thing out for fig trees?) for our first 3min break in... what seems like forever! *thumbs up!*




Ahhhhhhhh. Fail goes to Alex, for breaking the combo chain.
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Dexter blames the mess on Dee Dee and, in a fit of violent aggression, savagely beats her to the ground, causing massive hemorrhaging and sending her into a coma*... *children are confused by this plot twist and the producers retcon it out as a dream*...
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: And so ends our tirade of comments apparently.


*nobody mourns its loss and it is quickly buried out back beside our sense of dignity and modesty (it was one of those murder/suicide dealies)*


*Mort returns naked and muddy and washes off in the soup*
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: I got bored...>> sorry.
2011-07-07 [Alexi Ice]: A Lifetime Of Sex


1.) The first is Smurf Sex. This happens during the honeymoon, you both keep doing it until you're blue in the face.


2.) The second is Kitchen Sex. This is at the beginning of the marriage, you'll have sex anywhere, anytime, even in the kitchen.


3.) The third kind is Bedroom Sex. You've calmed down a bit, perhaps have kids, so you gotta do it in the bedroom.


4.) The fourth kind is Hallway Sex. This is where you pass each other in the hallway and say, "F*ck you!"


5.) The fifth kind of sex is Courtroom Sex. This is when you get divorced and your wife screws you in front of everyone in the courtroom.


There you go. More combo comments
2011-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: boredboredboredboredboredboredboredboredboredboredboredboredbored
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: This has to be the most active wiki on Elftown.


I fink it should be linked somewhere from Mainstreet, or some similar page, so members have a chat-wiki. (Other than just now)
2011-07-07 [Lord Josmar]: Well the only reason it isn't is because it serves a very specific clientele and most of Elftown is not this specific clientele.
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: Haha, I suppose.
2011-07-07 j@y!: 
Morning!


BTW it's not J at Y you morons, it's JAY!!! FUCKING JAY, DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?!!! *throws a fit and breaks shit*
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: If it's Jay, why not just spell it as.. "Jay"?
2011-07-07 j@y!: That's simply not original!
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: You don't need to be obviously original to be a unique person. =p
2011-07-07 [Paul Doyle]: *cruises by in NCC 1701-D Enterprise*


[Data, with his new emotion chip installed, is told to scan for life forms]
Data: I would be happy to, sir. I just *love* scanning for life forms!
[sings]
Data: Life forms! You tiny little life forms! You precious little life forms! Where are you?


  



http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dWBmaKk32fE



2011-07-07 Jesus: Quiet J at Y!. Jesus is drunk and doesnt want to put up with your crap.
2011-07-07 j@y!: Lucky for you, I'm wasted too!!!
2011-07-07 Jesus: Liar. Youre three hours ahead of Jesus' time and logically would have been passed out by now.


J at Y! = 0
Jesus = 1
2011-07-07 [American Revolutionary]: HEIL THE NAZI RAPTORS!!!!!
2011-07-07 j@y!: IT'S NOT FUCKING J AT Y YOU IDIOTS!!!!! *starts slapping self in the face in a panic rage*
2011-07-07 [kians mummy]: *starts slapping jay round the face to help him*
2011-07-07 Jesus: *grabs a knife and starts slicing Jays wrist with it so he don't have to do it himself*.
2011-07-07 j@y!: That was totally uncalled for *reported*
2011-07-07 [kians mummy]: Nothing will happen with it Jay as it is a guest member and on bob's diner, it is called role play, face it, deal with it, smell it, eat it, lick it, suck it :)
2011-07-07 j@y!: LOL I was just kidding, I can take the heat...
2011-07-07 [kians mummy]: come see Sammie's Restaurant
2011-07-07 j@y!: Sammie, make it where I can comment on it!
2011-07-07 [kians mummy]: I can't remember how to
2011-07-07 [kians mummy]: It has been exported
2011-07-07 j@y!: It's still not working! I don't know why lol.
2011-07-07 [Nekko fox]: *Comes back, whistling and dragging the charred remains of a sign that vaguely reads "Sammie's Restau" underneath the char, the splintered end covered in the gore of treasonous customers who left. He tosses a gas can to one side and prop's the battered remains of Sammie's Restaurant sign on their wall with the other mounted things. The head of the nun, Mistress Payn. Mort's stuffed lion (shot when it went rabid). The hand of Captain Hook (taken from the belly of a crocodile. We also chopped off his other hand). A few signs from other rival businesses which burned down inexplicably. And the proud showpiece in the center, Bob's Diner's lick her license.*


Ah, it's nice to see that we can keep adding to our diner's humble collection.
2011-07-07 [Nekko fox]: *Hangs up some furry porn on the wall too, because contrary to popular belief, hanging porn on your walls isn't tacky at all*
2011-07-07 [Nekko fox]:   



  




  




  




Only the classiest smut is welcome her at Bob's Diner, Art Gallery, and Hair Care Center.
2011-07-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Ey, I like the pink hair-do-not sure about the fury porn though!
2011-07-07 j@y!: Jeez [@45072], now I'm officially horny...
2011-07-07 [Nekko fox]: We cater to all the whims of today's cultural sleaze. We have no shame, just ask and we're game. Here at B's D, if your in a smut rut, we're here to help you glut. I am your host with the most, Nekko the Furfag, helping fulfill any furry fantasies that frolic through your fanciful faculties.
2011-07-07 [Nekko fox]: Anything outside the realm of furry, please inquire from your other hosts, Sagacious the Sodomy Enthusiast and Mort the Racially-Obscure Pervert.
2011-07-07 [Stephen]: o.o'
Woah. Jeeze.
2011-07-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I love the poem. Bitch.
2011-07-08 [Kitailec]: NO. D; MY EYES. MY EYESSS.
2011-07-08 [Lord Josmar]: What is with people posting porn here lately?
2011-07-08 [Nekko fox]: What is with you and being so NEW?! I've been posting porn here off and on again for YEARS.
2011-07-08 [Lord Josmar]: Well see that's all your fault! You shouldn't do anything "Off and on again" you should either be off or on!
2011-07-08 [Lord Josmar]: Support our Council banner contest plz go vote! Even if you don't support our council you can still vote on pretty banners!


*Pulls out shotgun from back pocket*


Also go to Lord Josmar's Emporium of Useless Information or LJEoUI for short.
2011-07-08 j@y!: I vote that [@58061]'s were better than any of the others...
2011-07-08 j@y!: 


FOR MY LOVELY, [@92105]
2011-07-08 [Lord Josmar]:       


Mine are better!
2011-07-08 [Paul Doyle]: I personally don't have a problem at all with the last four furry-related pics (hell, I'm part of the fandom myself though I'm sort of vanilla, and I'd be fooling nobody if I claim to be repelled by these particular pictures) but wonder where the limits are for imagery on public ET wikis. That being said, I don't shy away from a whole lot either on Ask Pauly the Anthro-Dragon! because I personally believe Elftown, while not be confused with Elfpack or Fake, should not be a place for kiddies AT ALL. So while I won't post X-rated pics or poems of Pauly the Anthro-Dragon getting it on (both exist, by the way) I don't have a problem with basic R-rated naughtiness on public wikis. :P
2011-07-08 [Nekko fox]: Wait, Bob's Diner is a public wiki?


WHEN DID THIS BLASPHEMY SPREAD?! KILL THE HERETICS!


*He starts burning the middle east*
2011-07-08 [Paul Doyle]: So make it a pubic wiki :P
2011-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of pubic, I'm late for my dentist appointment.


*a group of dentists look up from their bowls of children tears and teeth*


Hmm, let's see... *a-points at the dentist on the far left*


*enraged by this poor joke, they surround J at Y! and start forcefully removing his teeth*
2011-07-08 j@y!: 
2011-07-08 [American Revolutionary]: duuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmm 
2011-07-08 [Nekko fox]: Look, you broke our Canadian-speaking Nazi.
2011-07-08 [Pillowthief]: Thank god. Finally.
2011-07-09 j@y!: I heard [@58061] is coming back in 2012, what's that all about?
2011-07-09 [Paul Doyle]: This wiki is dying all of a sudden! O:
2011-07-09 [Flisky]: This wiki died because annoying images are annoying
2011-07-09 [kians mummy]: Note, if anyone wishes to leave, then stop watching the page, join sammie's restaurant instead!! :)
2011-07-09 j@y!: Epic win [@190782]! I would comment on your wiki but you don't have it public. This wiki isn't dying, some of you just suck at role playing which is no ones fault but your own...*exits bob's diner*
2011-07-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Attaches defibrillators to Bob*


Live dammit!


No, this wiki isn't dying, and it's not over til the fat lady sings. *Looks around for misty.*
2011-07-09 [Thunder Cid]: Bob's can't die you silly people.
2011-07-09 Jesus: J at Y!, who are you and why wont you go away?
2011-07-10 j@y!: Jesus, take a chill pill. You don't own me. Your not God.
2011-07-10 [Paul Doyle]: Let's all bow our heads and chant "Mort . . . Mort . . . Mort . . . ommmmm" until Mort comes back and kicks some ass around here, kind of like the old coots summoning Taarna the Taarnakian in the original "Heavy Metal" flick :P
2011-07-10 j@y!: Hey it's J at Y! again and I just wanted to say that I'm a great supporter of this wiki and wish to get involved a lot more with it as a returning member next spring. However, until than, I will leave my comments here. Let me do say I'm sorry for being a troll as you call it but under the circumstances that I was bullied all my life I've just been kinda pissed the fuck off so deal with it bitches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
FUCK YOUR BANS, THE BITCH IS BACK SPRING 2012
2011-07-10 [Sunrose]: blabla lol
2011-07-10 j@y!: Well look what the cat dragged in, someone who on multiple times banned my friends for UAR violations. Good job killing off us one by one.
2011-07-10 [hanhepi]: huh, i'd think that after the first time someone's images were taken off for violating the UAR, they might read the damn rules and, oh, i dunno, maybe follow them and not upload shit here that doesn't belong to them? that's what an intelligent person would do anyway.
2011-07-10 [Sunrose]: I don't want to talk to you, I just want ban ban ban! I don't want to know your name, I just want ban ban ban!
2011-07-10 [Avaz]: XD <3 Sunnyrosey!
2011-07-10 [Sunrose]: =D
2011-07-10 [Lord Josmar]: Careful, that may become the theme song for the guards, lol.
2011-07-10 [American Revolutionary]: *staggers around*
2011-07-10 [Pillowthief]: Sunny. Sunny, SunnySunnySunnySunny PoopOO-pants, pooPOO PANTS, POOpoo pants.








(Holy crap, maybe you're right Nekko- I think the idiot-son-of-an-Iowan is broken...)


And I still havent understood why J at Y! is leaving, but not-leaving, yet coming back next summer- IF they can stay away from not-leaving long enough to actually leave. Im with Jesus on this one.
2011-07-10 [Sunrose]: U R BARD 4 A WEEK!1!@
2011-07-10 [Alexi Ice]: *Beats Mort over the head with an iron stick* Wake up, you Son of a bitch!! Wake up!!


(Violence is the answer)
2011-07-10 [Nekko fox]: Wait...I'm right?! About what? Who is spreading these lies?!
2011-07-11 j@y!: j s to Henrik
        
show details Jul 9 (2 days ago)
        
I would like to make a compromise. I did two very wrong things towards my ban on Elftown. I stole pictures and I was harassing members. I feel a six month ban would be acceptable for punishment. Please let me know if you think this will work. Thank you.




Henrik Wallin to me
        
show details Jul 10 (0 days ago)
        
You have been leaving rude comments on several wiki-pages, you refuse
to stop commenting when told to by the wiki-page owners and you
created a wiki-page to attack Akane Ice. And when you were told to
stop, you used the Layre account to continue the harassment.
However, your request is reasonable enough. I have watched the
video response by Flisky & Thunder Cid and would like you back
because I think you could be great. Yes, I will accept this decision
as mayor of Elftown. See you in the new year james.


/Hedda
2011-07-11 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses Hedda, Hay, and the video into the soup*


This is boring and old, so it should fit right it with the soup.
2011-07-11 [Nekko fox]: *the soup burbles and coagulates like blood. It also releases a noxious odor similar to pixie sticks and urine, but that could just be the smell from the oven*
2011-07-11 [Paul Doyle]: Taaarnaaaaa . . . . Taaarnaaaa . . . Morrrrt, Morrrt . . .


  

2011-07-11 [Paul Doyle]:   


HOLY SHIT, MORT, IS THAT REALLY YOU!?!?!? DAYUMMMMMM!
2011-07-11 [Pillowthief]: What? Behind the angry looking purple-headed chick with the impossible (I couldnt even pull that off) skimpy clothes and the sword-- the alien looking rat-thing mounted on the wall?


Possibly.


  

2011-07-11 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-07-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: There is no way that if I wore that strapless bra, it would stay on. Super hero's are super for a reason. They defy the laws of gravity.
2011-07-11 [Alexi Ice]: Lol. Thats the dumbest thing i have ever seen. And i see some pretty dumb things here on bob's diner
2011-07-12 [Alexi Ice]: I take that *tried to make comment. Phone failed.* fuckit
2011-07-12 Jesus: Stay on topic! *slaps Alexi Ice across the mustache-teeth*
2011-07-12 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Now turn the other cheek. That's what Jesus would do
2011-07-12 [Lord Josmar]: We are missing a comment...
2011-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: . . . and Times/Dates as well . . .
2011-07-12 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah, I think it was my phone or something? O.o I sowwie *Grins a now mustache-less grin*
2011-07-12 [Stephen]: Somanyannoyingpictues.
2011-07-12 [Alexi Ice]: Of weenies!
2011-07-12 Jesus: *hugs J at Y!*
2011-07-12 j@y!: NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! & listen bitches!!! I'm not going anywhere so you can get over that, it's not happening. Don't blame me if people don't come here, I already said that it cause you all suck at roleplaying. Also, you should be able to be a part of a wiki even if the owner isn't on...just saying!!!
2011-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Pardon me, but would you have any Grey Poupon?
2011-07-12 [kians mummy]: J@Y: Be careful what you say to people on here, otherwise you may never be aloud back
2011-07-12 @Not logged in user@: [@1]
[@1] I hear that ELf12 is now coming to Elftown, hopefully soon, so this wiki will no longer be active as its not suitable for children


  
2011-07-12 [American Revolutionary]: *hand paul a case of grey poupon* here mien friend
2011-07-12 matty: To: [@1], [@5555] and the Elftown Crew + normal members.


Hi, I would like to apologise for my behaviour in the past, it was very wrong of me, and I’m very sorry, I really want to get back on Elftown and Elfpack as I miss all my friends on there, I promise not to act like an utter rotten human being again, I am disgusted at myself for the way I treated you all, I did not wish for this to happen.


My fiancé [Sammie’] is also on Elftown and I would like to be on here with her, I know I did some very wrong things, I.E: harassment, asking for them pictures, harassing the crew, but this will not happen again.


I’m sorry that this happened and I know it will be hard to forgive me, but I didn’t mean for this to happen.


I have grown up now, I have a better life, I’m not in care anymore, I no longer self harm, I just get on with my life the best way I can.


Please just give me one very last chance, let me prove that I’m a better person now  






From: [@187724] a banned member
2011-07-12 j@y!: I second that! Bring back Matty & [@58061]!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2011-07-12 [kians mummy]: lol
2011-07-12 j@y!: Listen, they want to give allegedly me [@58061] a six month ban. Matty has been banned for how long? Come on Elftown, give him a break, people do change. We all make mistakes and learn from them and I don't think he would write something so sincere if he didn't mean it.
2011-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *backhands J at Y!*


DELIVERIES GO AROUND BACK! *points at Sarlacc pit*
2011-07-12 [Nekko fox]: *Backhands J at Y with Sammie'*


BECAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT!


*Suddenly the zombies burst in from the basement and drag Sammie screaming into the street where she is messily devoured and then raped. In that order. Several people (who are probably just stand ins) wail at the loss of life, but they too are soon dragged into the street and consumed/raped. No one else who seems to care is bothered*
2011-07-12 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from reading his J at Y, looking over to their resident Taiwanese speaking German-Wannabe*


Make sure they don't get mud on the door, ya hear? And keep them away from the sheep. Mort needs his lovin' tonight, and he can't get it if the sheep aren't in good condition.
2011-07-12 [Lord Josmar]: I don't know if Hedda or Silverfire come here or not, but there is a good chance that they do not.


*Looks at list of past guests before covering it in A1 and devouring/raping it*
2011-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: [Hedda] and [SilverFire] WISH they were allowed here!
2011-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: Why don't you banned people simply go to Elfpack and stay there, already? Do you not find EP less restrictive than ET? If you think Elfpack sucks, why don't you guys help make Elfpack a better place? There's more freedom, more breathing room for people who have little to no real interest in an artistic-themed e-community. Elfpack was built for you banned people, to begin with :P
2011-07-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Obviously because Elfpack's Bob's Diner sucks compared to Elftown's.
2011-07-12 [Paul Doyle]: I guess it does! o____O


  

2011-07-13 Mystin: Thanks for the awesome run guys, but since I'm clearly not wanted here, I will be on my way now...but not to Elfpack. F that! & to my YouTube subscribers, I'll be making new videos soon...peace, love, & chicken grease!
2011-07-13 Jesus: You're never really leaving, are you. Sad days. *joins in the devouring/raping*
2011-07-13 @Not logged in user@: Punches J@Y in the throat.
2011-07-13 Betty Buckwhanna: *sends Barney to rape J@Y*
2011-07-13 [Alexi Ice]: How bout Fake? Fake exists too I think O.o
2011-07-13 [Top_Hatter]: *Notices Mort seems to have the same weekend hobbies* 0_o ...hmm, perhaps this weekend I shall have to grab 16 beers :/
2011-07-13 Mystin: Actually [@64936] has an amazing idea here. I wanted to show my penis so many times on here...nice idea.
2011-07-13 [Alexi Ice]: I don't think fake is anyone's amazing idea, not even Hedda
2011-07-13 [Nekko fox]: Fake is just another perverted social network for lunatics. That's why I signed up for it when I was still underageb@n.


*Sips his iced Alexi*




Mmm, menthol...
2011-07-13 [Alexi Ice]: I taste better with a little colorful umbrella
2011-07-13 [Paul Doyle]: Watch out for Barney? o______________X
2011-07-13 [Nekko fox]: *Skewers Alexi with an parasol instead*


FUCK YOUR CONFORMIST VIEWS!


*Spit roasts her. The task takes hours because the customers spitting on her are only around seventy degrees*
2011-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hey, that was my parasol. And it was under investigation by the FBI, because it seemed shady. The blinds too. *gestures toward the window*


For some reason though, not the deafs. I SAID NOT THE DEAFS! DON'T IGNORE ME, DICKS! I KNOW YOU CAN HEAR ME!! *the deafs don't look up from their platters of whatever it is deaf people eat*
2011-07-13 [kians mummy]: bollocks,
2011-07-13 [Lord Josmar]: They do not eat bollocks! The eat shrimp scampy.


*Suddenly all their shrimp gets up and runs away.*


I said shrimp SCAMPY not SCAMPERS!
2011-07-13 [Alexi Ice]: I don't taste good skewered though, grilled, I can work with, skewered not-so-much


Shady. lol.
2011-07-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Eminem looks up from his platter of Rabbit soup*
2011-07-13 [Nekko fox]: *The Mad Hatter cudgels Eminem*


"He was late for a date to see the Queen of Hearts you maniacal fiend!"


*Eminem dies under an avalanche of his own terrible music and the Mad Hatter goes back to sipping his tea or whatever crazy people sip*
2011-07-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the Angry Capper sips coffee*
2011-07-14 [Nekko fox]: *A Gentle Coffee drowns his woes in Angry Capper brand Gin*
2011-07-14 [Top_Hatter]: *sips tea, then adds more [Alexi Ice], steals cudgel back from [Nekko fox] and wipes Eminem's blood off on [Sagacious Turkey]* ...I thought I told you this cudgel is only to be used on Jabberwockies as it is a Vorpal cudgel! *starts bashing at himself as the scampering shrimp have invaded his clothing* Damn you, [Lord Josmar]!!! *falls over onto [kians mummy]s bollocks and dies* X_x
2011-07-14 [Lord Josmar]: *Grabs a broom and starts sweeping up all the names that were just dropped.*


2011-07-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Peers from above, the birds-eye view giving her the perfect vantage point, sets up her doughnut sniper*
2011-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: *Pisses in Hatters tea*
2011-07-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Pisses on Alexi* ;)
2011-07-14 [Alexi Ice]: Can I get some salt with that piss, dear?
2011-07-15 Jesus: Here you are sir! *hands over a cold, crisp, Mt Dew*
2011-07-15 Jesus: Oh. You wanted just salt, not more piss.


Sorry, out of pillars of salt. You should probably talk to Lot about that, I hear he's got a big one that's shaped like his wife.
2011-07-15 [Pillowthief]: That's why you never, ever, look directly at Rain of Sulfur©Bartleby&Loki 511BC
2011-07-15 [Nekko fox]: Pillow, what are you doing giving advice to our customers? You know you are legally obligated to act like a retarded chimpanzee and dry-hump people's faces if you do that...Court orders, after all.


*A husky policeman slaps a nightstick against his palm a few times as he eyes Pillow, waiting to see if he goes through with his court-order dry humping*
2011-07-16 [Pillowthief]: I thought I was under the other court order not to hump faces anymore! *points at the husky policeman behind the husky policeman who's awaiting with a cudgel*
2011-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I have some spare salt on me. I always carry around some extra, because I like to take everything with a grain of salt. *a-salts Alexi with an oversized pepper shaker*


*gets in line behind the husky policeman behind the husky policeman and starts twirling nunchucks menacingly*
2011-07-16 [Pillowthief]: That's right! You're going down!


*Gets in line behind Mort behind the husky policeman behind the husky policeman and starts twirling [9jlriexqk,ktpk] menacingly*
2011-07-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Jumps on [Pillowthief]'s back and starts twirling batons.
2011-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *jumps on batons and starts twirling [Pillowthief]'s back*... *the snapping of a spine can be heard*...
2011-07-16 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Dances around [Pillowthief]'s cold, lifeless body, and starts doing a naked warchant dance, whilst twirling the batons, juggling [Mortified Penguin]and [Pillowthief]'s spine and whoops loudly*
2011-07-16 [Nekko fox]: *starts swinging a husky policeman connected to a husky policeman, connected to a deranged Infinity, a bloody Mort, and a meth-addicted Pillow and proceeds to beat a retarded chimpanzee as it dry-humps Sammie's face, both of them wailing in misery*
2011-07-16 [Avaz]: That's one helluva daisy chain. o_o
2011-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from watering his garden* Thanks! And I've got a pretty good row of tulips going here too! *goes back to watering*
2011-07-16 [Avaz]: Not the kind of daisy chain to which I was referring. I bet those "tulips" are nice and watered. ;)
2011-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: They sure are! *continues obliviously watering the garden, before realizing there is no garden and I'm actually pouring a bucket of boiling water on a homeless man, who is screaming in pain*
2011-07-17 Jesus: Im not homeless! I was just resting my eyes! The pain!
2011-07-17 [Alexi Ice]: Hey, Mort's back from the grave
2011-07-17 [Lord Josmar]: Damnit! I knew I should have dug a deeper hole.


*Takes muddy, blood covered shovel out back to dig an even deeper hole*
2011-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! You forgot your gloves.
2011-07-17 [Lord Josmar]: Oh, thank you.


*Takes gloves that look strangely like human flesh


It's ok, their just flesh.
2011-07-17 [Top_Hatter]: *jumps out of the not-so-deep-hole and splashes piss-tea @ [Lord Josmar]* ...you forgot this too! *throws zombie-scampering shrimp at the husky policeman*
2011-07-17 [Lord Josmar]: *Due to polar radiation coming from the freezer (or possibly the giant bars of uranium on special today) the scampering zombie shrimp hit the husky policeman and immediately mutated into a hideous scampering husky policeman zombie shrimp who quickly arrests Mort for coming back to life without the proper permit. It does this without realizing the irony inthereof.*
2011-07-17 [louisasjj]: Hello. My name is Louisa. I am a caring and loving single girl willing to talk with people and learn more about each others culture and ways of leaving.I am happy to reply to your profile here , Little of my hobbies are listening to music, playing guitter, reading, cooking and dancing. I hope to have a good communication with you if you are caring no matter the space and distance. It will be appreciated if you write back to my email address ( louisa2ke@yahoo.com ) so that we can communicate better. i have many interesting things to share with you when i hear from you i will send you my beautiful photo and also tell you more about me.
Hope to hear from you.
Louisa
louisa2ke@yahoo.com
2011-07-17 [Avaz]: Hi spammer. I received the very same message this morning. >_<
2011-07-17 Jesus: Obviously, they haven't learned enough of our ways of 'leaving'.


*points vaguely in the direction of the door, like a good Jew would* *points out the obvious irony of the WWJD bracelets that Christians wear around*




Get it? Im Jewish? Bwahaha! Best sellers, they are!
2011-07-17 Jesus: What's that you say? Im a Jewish Christian? That Religulous!
2011-07-17 [Lord Josmar]: Wow, already banned for spamming! Lolz.
2011-07-17 [Paul Doyle]: Jesus, Spam is not Kosher. You are the first Christian, and yet you are a Jewish carpenter with strong religious convictions rooted in Judaism. You must have a hell of a quandary if you have nothing in the world left to eat, except for Spam. And I do believe a good Christian would stay the hell away from non-pork Spam since it's a loathsome ungodly shambling plop manufactured by Satan's helpers.


What gives, Jesus? What do you do in this situation?
2011-07-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, if he's anything like me, he'll turn to Satan.
2011-07-18 Jesus: Not so, my feeble-faithed friends. I've spoken with Spa'am from the Muppets Treasure Island concerning the matter And he had quite a bit to say on the matter.


Unfortunately, halfway through the conversation I realized that since I was a quazi-Jew, it was probably Ok to have ham, so I cooked that mother right on the spot.
2011-07-18 Jesus: Had a luau, drank a few beers. Even invited Hitler over for a bit.
2011-07-18 Jesus: Ended up getting Hitler drunk and convincing him to buy a bunch of WWJD bracelets. I'd feel better though, if I didn't know he's just going to use them to fix his oven's broken hinge.
2011-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, what'd you expect? The Maytag Repairman is a dick, so he couldn't really expect any help there. Poor Hitler tried calling the support hotline in Poland, but they were very rude to him. He had no other options, really.
2011-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Incidentally, we're at an average of 13.4 comments a day for this friscal year. We need to step it up a little, so we can at least break even on the yearly comment average (13.5 approx.). And according to the statistics compiled by drunken Billy, the local hobo, revenue is up 13-


HEY!! GET OUT OF THE BOARD ROOM! *quick draws a shotgun and fires at a customer entering the bathroom*
2011-07-18 [Flisky]: *looks up from the wooden board inventory as Mort shoots the delivery man* Well, there goes this years repairs.
2011-07-18 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from stack of customers that he's been lobbing into the bathroom to provoke Mort*


He shot the delivery repair man? Damn it!
2011-07-19 [Pillowthief]: No, just the delivery man. The repair man is next up and I think I can see the shoes of the delivery repair man- but he's like mid-pile. It's going to take some more shooting to bring him up.
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *pulls out the semi-automatic, rapid fire shotgun* ...Pull!!
2011-07-19 [Pillowthief]: So that's when Martha takes these scissors and just starts... *reaches over and pulls the lever, releasing an unsuspecting customer from the lobbing pile into the air* ...And BAM! she's got these fantastical drapes going. *murmuring can be faintly heard from the phone* Yeah, I know, but I never seem to be able to get the colors right for Fall. And don't get me started on th.... *conversation fades into inconsequentialism*
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! *points at Pillowthief, who is using a plastic phone filled with candy* That phone is for business/hookers only! I swear to God, if that's another long distance call, I'm go- *shoots a screaming woman flying through the air* -ing to fu- *using what's left of her legs, she starts trying to crawl away after landing*... *shoots her 47 more times at point blank range, which is completely necessary*...
2011-07-19 [Ninja Smurf]: Quit shooting your reflection Mort! Just 'cus you didn't like how the operation turned out is no need to be so emo about it. At least you didn't turn out as bad as [Pillowthief]
2011-07-19 [Nekko fox]: *Bastardizes Sammie before loading another chump into the projectile-launching chump chair*


Yeah, I totally agree. Totally. Right? Guy bro man dude?


*the scream customer flies through the air like an early dream of mankind...at approximately mach 2*
2011-07-19 [Top_Hatter]: Just so you know, I will not be held responsible for any liabilities due to lack of proper trebuchet protocol. I don't mind you using it to literally "fire" people, but there is a certain weight limit, so don't be firing too many at once...also, the use of the Beaver Cannon is now available. Enjoy :)
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *the customer proceeds to fly completely through the roof and into the sky, where he collides with a meteor*... *the collision fuses their DNA and they become the mighty Meteor Man!*... *moments later, Meteor Man realizes that meteors do not have DNA and he explodes (a typical side effect of realizing things) and the remains of the meteor, now a little meatier, continue its previous course toward Sammie's face*...
2011-07-19 Mystin: *walks into the diner drunk and depressed*
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *notices Mystin walking into the wall of the diner*


You know, there IS a door, you drunk basta- *starts to point toward the entrance, but notices the door has been stolen yet again by the local Inuit gang, presumably for sledding purposes*


DANG IT! *grabs the flamethrower out of the ball pit in the daycare section and storms out the hole in the wall*
2011-07-19 [Nekko fox]: *Rolls his eyes*


Oh Mort, you know Inuits are impervious to fire damage. Pokemon taught us that!


Oh wait, no, that's flight.


Nevermind, carry on.


*Sneaks off, carrying Mystin under his arm for some late-night sledding*
2011-07-19 Jesus: *meets up with Nekko Fox carrying Sammie's mother*


Hey! You have an uglier sled than mine! Where ever did you find it?
2011-07-19 [Nekko fox]: *Pats his Mystin lovingly*


Well, sometimes you get lucky, sometimes you have skill. Me? I just hit him with a brick and dragged him out. Wanna race down that steep and rocky cliff we had installed the other day?
2011-07-19 Jesus: Sweet! Triple black diamond! First one to the bottom alive gets a sno-cone!
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, I see you're enjoying the new Misty Mountains.


*some Tolkien Estate lawyers look up from their platters of unborn fetuses and souls*


Er, I mean, the new Amebara Mountains.
2011-07-19 [Nekko fox]: I thought you had those legally changed to the Misty1 Mountains to avoid lawsuits?


Did the lawyers come back, parched and thirsty for more souls?


*Hops on Mystin's back and grinds his way down the loop-the-loops and jagged broken glass traps of the mountain*
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY GOD, THAT'S DANGEROUS! *removes a small piece of gravel from the slope and tosses it into some British guy's tea*


"I say!"
2011-07-19 [Avaz]: Says him. Pfft.
2011-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Says who?
2011-07-19 [Nekko fox]: Says he!


*Grinds his way down to the bottom of the cliff and steps off the physically and emotionally broken shell of human being that once was Mystin-turned-Toboggan and knocks over the British guys tea*


"I say!"


SHUT UP YOU BASTARD! PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO TALK WITHOUT YOU INTERRUPTING THEM!
2011-07-19 [Paul Doyle]: Walkin' in the park just the other day, baby,
What do you, what do you think I saw?
Crowds of people sittin' on the grass with flowers in their hair said,
"Hey, Boy, do you wanna score?"
And you know how it is.
I really don't know what time it was, woh, oh,oh
so I asked them if I could stay a while.


I didn't notice but it had got very dark and I was really
Really out of my mind.
Just then a policeman stepped up to me and asked us, said, "Please,hey,
would we care to all get in line, Get in line."
Well, you know, they asked us to stay for tea and have some fun; Oh, oh,oh.
he said that his friends would all drop by, ooh.


Why don't you take a good look at yourself and describe what you see,
and baby, baby, baby, do you like it?
There you sit, sitting spare like a book on a shelf rustin',
ah, not trying to fight it.
You really don't care if they're comin'; oh, oh,
I know that it's all a state of mind.


If you go down in the streets today, baby, you better,
you better open your eyes. WOAH WOAH YEAH
Folk down there really don't care, really don't care, don't care , really don't , which, which way the pressure lies,
so I've decided what I'm gonna do now.
So I'm packing my bags for the Misty Mountains
where the spirits go now,
over the hills where the spirits fly.
I really don't know.
2011-07-20 Jesus: *grinds his way down the asbestos strewn backside of the mountain, littered with suspicious looking steel pikes*


Hey guys, why do these look suspiciously like the Spear of Destin- URRK!! *Jesus fails to dodge Misty1 Mountain's Forrest of Jesus Killing Traps*


Why? God, why? Not again! All I wanted was a sno-cone!
2011-07-20 [Nekko fox]: *watches as a slew of angry lawyers wielding pens and summonses tackle Paul for trying to connect a Led Zeppelin song to Bob's Diner's Amebara/Misty1 Mountains and stab him repeatedly with their court orders*


Hey, look at that. I just realized that those giant rolling hills were actually Amebara/Misty/Misty1's fat rolls.




*Lets this sink in for a few minutes before dousing himself in kerosene and lighting himself on fire to burn away the unclean feeling*
2011-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, your skin is dripping on my carpet. *points at a patch of mold growing on the floor*


I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT MY CARPET!


*douses himself in kerosene and lights himself on fire*... *moments later, the repair delivery man shows up with a new carpet, but it is too late, as Mort is already dead and therefore can't sign for the package*
2011-07-20 Mystin: <3
2011-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, (18min ago), 3 is indeed greater than Mystin(colon). Quite a peculiar username you have though.
2011-07-20 [Flisky]: No..it's (22min ago)...Stop changing your username!
2011-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Who stopped watching this wiki? [Alexi Ice]? Was it you? Skank whore slut.
2011-07-20 [Lord Josmar]: I think a better question is who are the seventeen people who think this wiki is "friendly"?
2011-07-20 Mystin: *eats a piece of gum from under the tabletop*
2011-07-20 Spirit of Mystin: Dude, that wasn't gum. You ate old boogers.
2011-07-20 Spirit of Mystin: Don't slash your wrist or anything.
2011-07-20 Mystin: *spits boogers at Spirit of Mystin*
2011-07-20 Spirit of Mystin: The Spirit of Mystin beckons Mystin to leave this wiki with all due speed! Otherwise . . . I shall haunt the living Mystin in his dreams! There will also be a tiny midget with a choad and wearing an Elmo mask waiting for Mystin, to love Mystin always.
2011-07-20 Mystin: *knifes the Spirit of Mystin with a dagger and makes a yummy stew of stfu for breakfast*
2011-07-20 Spirit of Mystin: I am a spirit . . . not of this world . . . your dagger is not enchanted, and your little Elmo-masked midget friend is waiting for you with a happy enchanted choad. Now bend over and get some enchantment from the midget, so you can strike me down. don't forget to Tickle His Elmo *floats and lurks and haunts, glowing blue and white*
2011-07-20 Spirit of Mystin: And if you kill the spirit of Mystin . . . by extension you kill the living Mystin, too! You will have loved what you have destroyed, and destroyed the thing that you love above all else . . . yourself! Me! US! *shimmers like Obi-Wan's ghost*
2011-07-20 Mystin: Give me an emo mask, I wear it much better. *Kills Mystin...fades to black*
2011-07-20 Spirit of Mystin: Okay, so now you're dead. So what am I doing here, now that you're dead? shouldn't I be dead also, by extension? Oh, wait! I'm a ghost of someone named Mystin who was dead, and apparently is still dead. Does anybody actually care? Never mind. If it was still corporeal, my brain would hurt right about now. It's not like you've become One with the Force or anything. *shrugs and lurks*
2011-07-20 [Nekko fox]: Wow, it sure is goth all up in this bitch! Ghosts and emo and shit all hanging around, better change the decor.


*Starts spraying everything with supersoaker filled with ink*
2011-07-20 [Avaz]: *the octopus you stole the ink from rages at Nekko*
2011-07-20 [Nekko fox]: *Laughs maniacally*


Without your ink, YOU'RE POWERLESS!


*the octopus is terribly overwhelmed with this realization and flops about ineffectively on the floor*
2011-07-21 [Flisky]: *octopus uses flail, but nothing happens*


Silly octopus. *goes back to paper*
2011-07-21 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko uses 'Boot the the Head'. It is ineffective*


Damn it.


*Goes back to spraying ink*
2011-07-21 [American Revolutionary]: *storms in with a unit of nazi soldiers* kill them!!!!1
2011-07-21 Mystin: *rises from the dead* I'm a zombie now bitches.
2011-07-21 [Nekko fox]: *Points at Waffen*


Good, start by chewing on that Canadian.
2011-07-22 [Avaz]: *Canadian bacon runs for its life*
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mexican bacon runs for the border*
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Kenyan bacon runs in the Olympics*
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Teenage bacon runs up the phone bill*


DAMMIT, TEENAGE BACON! I told you no more long distance calls to your boyfriend in Fry-daho! *teenage bacon ignores me and is promptly eaten for her transgressions*
2011-07-22 [Avaz]: *American bacon runs for political office*
2011-07-22 [Nekko fox]: *German Bacon invades French and Polish Bacon before shooting itself in the Bacon When Europe Bacon, Russian Bacon and American Bacon gang up on him*
2011-07-22 [Nekko fox]: *Japanese Bacon cries itself to sleep after masturbating to Loli Bacon Hentai*
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MY BACON BITS DOUJINSHI!! It's all stained now, you stupid baka bakan bacon bastard!
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *snaps the Japanese bacon's crispy neck*
2011-07-22 [Lord Josmar]: *Russian Bacon bacons you!*
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *shatters a can (that's right! a can!) of Vodka over Russian bacon's head and breaks off and eats Kamchatka bacon*
2011-07-22 [Flisky]: *kamikaze bacon kills itself by crashing into Bob's Diner*
2011-07-22 [Stephen]: This place is wrong. =(
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: You... you didn't use the word 'bacon'...
2011-07-22 [Flisky]: What the bacon is wrong with you?
2011-07-22 [Lord Josmar]: The correct sentence was "This bacon place is wrong. =("


*Grammar Bacon uses its +5 bacon warhammer of sizzley goodness and smashes [Stephen]*
2011-07-22 Mystin: *slices toast*
2011-07-22 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *collects random bacon grease*
2011-07-22 [Sheamus Finn]: *watches toast slice Mystin back* I got my money on the loaf of wheat.
2011-07-22 [Stephen]: Bacon is gross. D:
2011-07-22 [Avaz]: Bacon is God's gift to food. Pigs are doing God's work.
2011-07-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *toast holds up a bank at knife point*


My, that's a strong piece of toast! I can't even hold up a bank with my arms, much less a kni- *toast stabs me*


Bacon.
2011-07-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-07-22 [Avaz]: Eeeeexcellent! 
2011-07-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-07-22 [Paul Doyle]: Kevin Bacon clones himself with wild abandon and pushes everyone else out of Hollywood, so he no longer has to rely on intense networking skills to stay employed.
2011-07-23 Mystin: STRANGER DANGER!!! THERE'S TWO MYSTINS LOL.....DOUBLE TROUBLE FTW!
2011-07-24 Mystin: WHERE THE HELL IS EVERYONE!?!!
2011-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper*


Yeah, deliveries go around ba-


OH MY GOD!!


I forgot, we're putting them around on the side, because they're doing construction out back. *points in some random direction and goes back to not caring*
2011-07-24 Mystin:
*ducks a pie in the face from homeless man*
2011-07-24 [Top_Hatter]: *pies a duck with a homeless man, then eats bacon*
2011-07-24 Jesus: Crap. I thought you had left? As in not coming back here anymore? As in you're annoying us?
2011-07-24 [Nekko fox]: Quiet HEY-ZUES, and finish mowing the lawn. Why do you think you only earn four dollars and hour? Wait, what's that?


*Turns as a brutally scarred and disfigured intern, his face masked by burns, whispers in his ear*


Oh good god, why won't you people die?


*Mercy kills a hobo*


That's what you need intern. Too bad you won't get such a sweet release here at Bob's Diner. oh Hey-Zues, sorry to do this to you, but because of the economy and current budget cuts at B'S D, you are now being paid two dollars and hour, and we charge for the water you drink. Tough break.
2011-07-24 Mystin: Whos is Jesus going on about? Go resurrect somewhere else and get off my case you asshat!
2011-07-24 [American Revolutionary]: *runs around like a nut*
2011-07-24 Mystin: 
2011-07-24 [Lord Josmar]: Mystin's nose is BROWN.


On my phone or I woulda photoshopped something too.
2011-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Nuts don't run, STUPID. They roll.


*the bar nuts start running away*


Well, I'll be.
2011-07-25 [Jewl]: *wakes up, struggles to free herself from tape* Who did this?!
2011-07-25 [Lord Josmar]: *Continues to eat a roll of duct tape*


Sorry, I really had to go.
2011-07-25 [Nekko fox]: *Drags Jewl onto some well-traveled train tracks*


Pretty much every disgruntled patron helped do this. Now be quiet. Mort needs to do his "Evil Villain" act before we can crush you 'neath the mighty tread of the trains.
2011-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Nyah ha haa! *twirls curly villain mustache*
2011-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, hell. This is my rapist mustache. *changes mustaches*


Much better. NYAH HA HAA!
2011-07-25 [Paul Doyle]:   
2011-07-25 Mystin: What the hell?
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: Shut your mouth, my son. And you thought I was dead! I am you, you are me, and when you rise from the ashes I'm still hanging around. You might as well call the Exorcist, because I lurk as you lurk. You could learn a lot from a ghost. Just ask Luke Skywalker.
2011-07-25 [Nekko fox]: *Luke Skywalker looks up from his bowl of Boo-Berry Crunch and tearfully wails*




"Oh God, it's TRUE! The ghosts never leave me."


*The ghost of Yoda appears beside him*


"Mmmm, bitch a lot, you do."
2011-07-25 Mystin: I'm the soul of Mystin, fuck my spirit, Elftown already did that. Hide behind your bullshit screen names......loser.
2011-07-25 [Paul Doyle]: How do we know all these people who aren't logged on, aren't the same person? xD
2011-07-25 Mystin: I'm the real Mystin, obviously. All of these Mystin ghosts and spirits are just the incredibly more annoying parts of my personna coming here to harass you decent people who haven't been douchey enough to be banned. :P
2011-07-25 [Paul Doyle]: Multiple-personality much? So these not logged-in users are you? (Though Jesus gets a free pass since he's the Almighty and all) You're essentially talking to yourself, then?
2011-07-25 Mystin: I DIDN'T EVEN SAY THAT!!!
2011-07-25 j@y!: If it wasn't you, who was it?!
2011-07-25 Mystin: I don't know j at y!!...moron!
2011-07-25 Mystin: Of course they're all me. I thought I made it clear when I was actually allowed on this site that I have several different personalities. Didn't you watch my Youtube videos? If you couldn't tell by watching those, then I don't know how else to convince you.
2011-07-25 j@y!: Who are you calling a moron *pff*
2011-07-25 Mystin: j@y is me, too. :P
2011-07-25 Mystin: YOU, CLEARLY!!!
2011-07-25 j@y!: Just go away loserface!! meh!
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: So you're calling yourself a moron?
2011-07-25 Mystin: NEVER. F U and everyone else who keeps trying to make me leave. It's not going to happen. Mort & Turkey like me so deal with it.
2011-07-25 j@y!: I don't want to "deal with it" No one likes you so please LEAVE!!!
2011-07-25 Mystin: If you're trying so hard to make yourself leave, Mystin, then why don't you leave?
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: I don't even think he's that attractive.
2011-07-25 God: You know, all these ghosts and whatnot floating around are just little glitches. I haven't quite worked out the bugs in the software you see. I never really took it all that seriously, then this virus I got from a porn site titled "hoomunz.exe" corrupted everything and started multiplying.
2011-07-25 Mystin: I will "leave" when they change the layout of the page if they want me to you idiot troll!!!
2011-07-25 Mystin: I'm super attractive! What are you talking about?!
2011-07-25 [Paul Doyle]:   
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: You're so not.
2011-07-25 j@y!: I will stop you there...he's pretty hot, thanks for asking him to go to fake...the screen wasn't big enough for his...
2011-07-25 Mystin: J at Y shut the hell up you creeper!!!
2011-07-25 j@y!: Why should I? If you won't leave, I'll make you leave.
2011-07-25 Mystin: How are you possibly going to do that?
2011-07-25 j@y!: Idk but I will find a way
2011-07-25 Mystin: LOL.....if you say so loser.....& please stay away from my pictures....*runs away*
2011-07-25 [Paul Doyle]: I think someone's cheese just slid off his Triscuit . . . o__O
2011-07-25 Mystin: Whatever. I'm done with this stupid site.
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: Good.
2011-07-25 Mystin: Bob's Diner is retarded anyway.
2011-07-25 Mystin: Stop it duplicate Mystin. You will never be ME!!!!
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: Not as much as you, but yeah.
2011-07-25 Mystin: God, I'm insane.
2011-07-25 j@y!: I can't disagree with that!
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: Definitely. But still not hot.
2011-07-25 Mystin: STOP IT YOU TROLLS!!!
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: I can't stop. I'm you, and as long as you're here trolling, so am I (but being hotter than you all the while).
2011-07-25 Mystin: A spirit can't be "hot" *scratches head*
2011-07-25 Mystin: Fine, I'm really leaving.
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: Hot from the hellfire that got me for being such a troll.
2011-07-25 j@y!: I WIN!!! =P
2011-07-25 [Nioniel]: ...
2011-07-25 Mystin: It's a crew member, j at y..."attack!"
2011-07-25 j@y!: Ummm..unlike you Mystin...I don't fear the "crew"
2011-07-25 Mystin: *get on a rocket and flies away*
2011-07-25 Mystin: I can't help it, I'm scared of everything.
2011-07-25 j@y!: Wait!!! How am I supposed to get back home now?!! Damn it Mars!!!
2011-07-25 Virtuous1: I'm the real Mystin, all these others are posers!!!
2011-07-25 j@y!: I don't want to be "Mystin"!
2011-07-25 Mystin: No I'm not, who the hell are you?!!
2011-07-25 j@y!: ARGG1!!!! I'm so confused!
2011-07-25 Virtuous1: Yeah me too, I'm confused as to why Jay posted a 2 minute video on his Youtube just crying and than deleted all his friends and subscribers...weird stuff.......
2011-07-25 j@y!: Cause he is INSANE!!! Duh
2011-07-25 Mystin: Did NOT! I so didn't do that...not all of that anyway...
2011-07-25 Mystin: Crazy, for sure.
2011-07-25 j@y!: lol what were you crying about this time?
2011-07-25 Mystin: I wasn't!!!!
2011-07-25 j@y!: Did you contradict yourself again or crying cause Elftown won't unban you?
2011-07-25 Mystin: Listen, guys, I'm a really annoying troll, we all know that, and yeah, sometimes I steal huge loads of art from other people on the internet and claim it's my own, and sure, once in awhile I've put up stupidly obnoxious youtube videos of myself trying to be cool using terrible fake accents and bitching about how people online don't like me, but when it all comes down to it, I'm a real bastard.


Uh, I mean, shithead.


Please like me.
2011-07-25 Mystin: I WASN'T CRYING!!! I'M NOT A DRAMATIC EMO LOSER..K? THANX!
2011-07-25 Mystin: They were tears of joy, which don't count.
2011-07-25 j@y!: lol wow Mystin......finally, you tell it like it is!!!
2011-07-25 Mystin: Joy at...being...fake british.
2011-07-25 Mystin: At least I'm honest. Except all those times I haven't been.
2011-07-25 Mystin: You know it was such a cherry on top of my day to spend countless hours stealing pictures on tumblr and than "harassing" other members cause it's not like I have a life or anything....
2011-07-25 j@y!: Wait........YOUR NOT BRITISH! *head spin*
2011-07-25 Mystin: Which is why I'm on here so much, on a site that clearly doesn't want me. I have zero friends, and everyone I've ever met thinks I'm a huge asswipe.
2011-07-25 Mystin: I even made up a fake boyfriend!
2011-07-25 j@y!: Wait........YOUR GAY! *head spin*
2011-07-25 Mystin: ...only when it's convenient.
2011-07-25 Mystin: No, I just say I'm gay, because it makes me feel more dramatic.
2011-07-25 Mystin: see, I agree with myself.
2011-07-25 j@y!: WTF?! I'm sure your parents are so proud of the psycho emo they raised.
2011-07-25 Mystin: I'm so emo, I don't have parents. I came from the deep, dark, trolling nothingness in the universe.
2011-07-25 Mystin: They cut my wrists for me. Which made me so sad, I had to cut my wrists again to express it.
2011-07-25 j@y!: Wow so you grew up w/paul, luke, & alexi? That's fascinating stuff!
2011-07-25 Mystin: I'm way more emo than them.
2011-07-25 j@y!: It's across the bridge, don't forget! ^_*
2011-07-25 j@y!: How emo is EMO?!
2011-07-25 Mystin: Can't you guys just tell me you like me? I'd kill myself to have someone say they could stand my existance.
2011-07-25 Spirit of Mystin: Kill yourself first, then we'll believe you.
2011-07-25 j@y!: *thinks*.....Are you asking us to "lie" to you?
2011-07-25 Mystin: Damn it, I already killed you!!! All I have now is my soul.
2011-07-25 Mystin: Yeah, whatever gives me an excuse to take my own life dramatically.
2011-07-25 j@y!: I told you you were hot, isn't that enough?
2011-07-25 Mystin: Ugh.......no!
2011-07-25 j@y!: I thought you said you were gay and wanted to be butt raped? :-)
2011-07-25 Mystin: You're such a freak!!! >.<
2011-07-25 j@y!: Isn't that why you love me?
2011-07-25 Mystin: I don't even like you....
2011-07-25 j@y!: Sure you don't...
2011-07-25 Mystin: *kicks J at Y to the floor* Take that, bitch.
2011-07-25 j@y!: Ouch!!!!! WTF?! *pushes Mystin through a glass table*
2011-07-25 Mystin: It's on now! *grabs J at Y by his emo hair and slaps him*
2011-07-25 j@y!: Stop it!!!!!!!!!!
2011-07-25 Mystin: You're right, you are not worth my time or strength....none of you are.....
2011-07-25 j@y!: Crazy bitch!!!
2011-07-25 Mystin: *Exit's bob's diner after punching a hole in the wall*
2011-07-25 j@y!: *goes back to eating his rat fries*
2011-07-25 The Wall: Come back and fight me you little bitch! You think you can punch holes in me and you can just walk away?! Tool!


*Another customer punches a hole in the wall, followed by a third and a fourth. The wall grows silent as he realizes that he is, in fact, just a wall.*
2011-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet merciful Satan below, what the heck?!


Someone moved my salt shaker. *puts it back by the pepper*
2011-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... MY WALL!
2011-07-26 The Wall: The fuck are you lookin' at Honky?


*The Wall struggles to punch [@92105]. It succeeds only in raining asbestos laced plaster into several customers' food*
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Why do people keep calling me that?! Why?! *smashes face into the wall*... *my comically large, red, horn nose honks loudly*...
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: *Waves at Honky, indicating it glowing glory to several cowering children*


There you are children! Honky the Racist Clown!


*Several ethnically-inclined children fidget awkwardly*
2011-07-26 Mystin: *walks in singing "your favorite fairy is back!" with ruffle feathers around his neck & high heels* Oh wait, tonight isn't that night? *puzzled*
2011-07-26 Spirit of Mystin: That's not the real Mystin . . . *shrugs shoulders* I give up for now, anyway.
2011-07-26 Mystin: LOL That was me!!! JAYNESS! <3
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Honky makes a noose out of a balloon and hands it to a crying black kid before whispering gently erotic threats into his ear*
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: *the child kicks honky in the yarbles and scampers off*
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: MY YARBLES!!
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: HIS YARBLES!
2011-07-26 j@y!: 
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: No, not his yarbles. My yarbles. See? Right here on the bag it says so... *points at some illegible squiggles on a box*
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: That says "Return to Anton".


*Indicates illegible squiggles*
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure it does. Suuuuure it does.


*wears a sweater with "Anton" embroidered on it*
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: Careful. Anton doesn't like people wearing his things.
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Anton? I don't know no Anton. I'm sick of these accusations! I'm going for a drive! *puts on a hat with "Anton" on it and peels out of the parking lot in a Porsche with a vanity plate that says "Anton"*
2011-07-26 Anton: That's my sweater! And hat! And my car!
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure it is. Suuuuure it is.


*makes out with a girl wearing an "I love Anton" shirt*
2011-07-26 [Stephen]:   
2011-07-26 [Lord Josmar]: AH! The purple cat people are invading!!!!!!


*Points, while screaming hysterically at a group of adorable kitties eating cheezeburgers before shooting them with a rocket launcher*
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: *Pats Anton on the shoulder as the big lug sobs into his hands*


There there.


*checks his watch to see if he's given the necessary amount of court-order sympathy*
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks back in, covered in blood and motor oil, after crashing into a federal building*... *takes off sweater and hat and tosses them into the incinerator*... *TV reports declare that some guy named Anton is now on the FBI's Most Wanted list*... *goes back to reading the paper or whatever it was I was doing before*...
2011-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... *reads an article saying, "A local man, by the name of Anton, crashed into a federal building today, killing his girlfriend, his car, his hopes and aspirations, and about 467 politicians, none of whom will be missed. Also counted in the slaughter was a family of diseased rats. Their memorial service will be held Thursday in the White House. All world leaders will be in attendance."*


Man, this paper is pretty recent...
2011-07-26 [Nekko fox]: *Walks away from Anton*


Yeah, you're on your own pal.
2011-07-26 [Paul Doyle]: I thought Anton was actually Mystin/j@y/Spirit of Mystin in disguise . . .
2011-07-27 [Sheamus Finn]: *looks at Mortified Penguin* What no lobbyists?
2011-07-27 [Nekko fox]: *throws Sheamuss to a bunch of rabid lobbyists*
2011-07-27 [Lord Josmar]: *Lobbyists tear into Sheamus with their little petitions and causes that no one else cares about.*
2011-07-27 [Nekko fox]: *The media gets stirred into what could be considered a frenzy. But not really*
2011-07-27 [Lord Josmar]: *In the frenzy many medias report false information, such as Bob's Diner not being a main source of Ebola.*
2011-07-27 [Paul Doyle]: *the media brings in horny infected green monkeys to spread HIV*
2011-07-27 [Nekko fox]: *The media starts spreading the Rage Virus. Everyone is quite pleased with the results*
2011-07-27 [Paul Doyle]: http://www.virusmyth.com/aids/news/namonkey.htm
2011-07-27 [Stephen]:     
2011-07-27 [Nekko fox]: Ew...
2011-07-27 [Paul Doyle]: Be careful of that monkey . . .
2011-07-27 Mystin: The bitch is back!
2011-07-27 [Paul Doyle]: Bitch, spank that monkey.
2011-07-27 [Stephen]:     
I am determined to show love and goodwill on this page.   
2011-07-27 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: There's horny infected green monkeys with HIV. How much more love do you need? Are you a nymphomaniac?
2011-07-27 [Nekko fox]: OH SWEET JESSUS (Yes, Jessus)! Simpet is infected by the Horny Green Monkey Syndrome! Now the HIV they are carrying is transferable via explosions!


*Throws Simple Simpet into the quarantine room/trash compactor. He flips the decontaminate/squish button, and leaves to go feed the Farm Raised Horny Green Monkeys Infected with HIV. Several of them are already trained and serving customers. The molestation and biting incidents have increased ten fold since the banana shortage was declare five minutes ago*
2011-07-27 [Stephen]: T_T
I still love you even if you are going to squish me to death, Nekko.   
2011-07-27 [Paul Doyle]: Don't look now, but here comes Marlon Brando as Dr. Moreau!
2011-07-28 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his Monkey Syndrome Tea*


Hm?
2011-07-28 [Lord Josmar]: *Looks up from his Tea Syndrome Monkey*


Por Que?
2011-07-28 [Avaz]: *Looks up from his Tea Syndrome Monkey*


*pours some que for [Lord Josmar]*
2011-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: MY POTASSIUM!!


*snatches bottle of K back*
2011-07-28 [Flisky]: *hands Mort the bottle of Syndrome Monkey Tea cleverly disguised as a bottle of K* There you go. *goes back to newspaper*
2011-07-28 Mystin: *runs in circle chasing his tail*
2011-07-28 [Sheamus Finn]: Mutant! *cuts off Mystin's tail*
2011-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Now he won't turn into a great ape when he sees the full moon. Just an average ape.
2011-07-28 [Paul Doyle]: Be careful where you get you potassium and protein sources from, espsecially when there's spanked monkeys lurking in the midst (mist?).
2011-07-28 [Nekko fox]: Hey Paul, can you explain how your ESP secially works? And could you explain what a secial is? Is it closer to sexual, or social?
2011-07-28 [Paul Doyle]: Nekko, "ESP secially" is that which lights an anthrodragon's psychosomatic fire, that which influences the development of Dragon Lotion and some serious snugglebunnies. In the absence of true magic, ESP and more finely developed psionic powers bridge the gap between that which is known, that which is unknown, and even that which people honestly don't give a fuck about. Also, a "secial" is type of groovy orgy. It is sexual, and it is social. Caligula would be proud, toga or no togas.
2011-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: What? There are Gorillas in the Mist?


*Dian Fossey looks up from her platter of worms, before returning to her grave*
2011-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: One can't help but wonder how many asterisks have been used here...
2011-07-28 [Lord Josmar]: *A group of asterisks look up from ther asterisk stew.*


It could be a bit more asterisky.
2011-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: It's always a (ster) risk dealing with asterisks. *a passing asterisk shanks Misty's face*
2011-07-28 [American Revolutionary]: *sits in corner in beaten BDUs and looks at the patrons* i must say....
2011-07-28 [Paul Doyle]: "America's Dirtiest Hotels". http://travel.yahoo.com/p-interests-40544197 Bob's Diner must be near one of these places.
2011-07-28 [Nekko fox]: *Hops onto Waffen's shoulders and beats them around the face and chest with a riding crop, parading Waffen around the room in tight little circles before stampeding him face first into the zombie nest. He hops off as the zombies start chewing on the Bulgarian soldier of fortune*


Now, what were we talking about?
2011-07-28 [Lord Josmar]: *Watches as the zombies dine*


Anyone else suddenly craving Belgian Waffles?
2011-07-29 [Nekko fox]: *Some waffles look up from their Children Flambe and look rather put out by Lord Josmar's comment*


"We say!"


*Nekko points at the freezer*


You DON'T say because we never PAYED you to say! Now get back in the freezer!


*They dejectedly crawl back into the freezer*
2011-07-29 [Stephen]:   
LOVE ONE ANOTHER, GOD FRICKIN' DAMMIT!




  
  
  

2011-07-29 [Lord Josmar]: *God turns around from the dam he is building*


You want it done faster you can do it yourself!


*God threw his hammer down and stormed off talking about the "Good ol' days"*
2011-07-29 [Nekko fox]: *several thousand devout Catholics are crushed 'neath God's mighty tread as he storms off, and hundreds more are destroyed by God's carelessly thrown hammer. The survivors praise God for sparing them, while those who were killed were mourned but soon ignored with phrases like "God's will be done" and "It must've been their time." *


2011-07-29 Mystin: *falls of the roof of bob's diner attempting to fly*
2011-07-29 Mystin: *off*
2011-07-29 [Avaz]: *the spring, summer and winter of the roof hold a funeral service for fall*
2011-07-29 [Sunrose]: bob's whiner..
2011-07-29 [Paul Doyle]: Bob's Emo versus Bob's Whiner. Place yer bets, folks . . . odds please? Opening odds:


Bob's Emo ([Mystin])----- 3:2
Bob's Whiner ([Stephen])-- 2:3
Dark Horse ??????????????????


Feel free to expand and modify . . . and determine what this event might be (horse race, jai alai, steel cage death match, catfight, slapfest, etc)
2011-07-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *Dark Horse looks up from his bowl of hay and oats*


*"Neigh!" he shouts dramatically, before casually returning to his hay/oat bowl*
2011-07-30 [Stephen]: xD
I like that title.


Now, as I was saying. Love love love. :D
  

2011-07-30 [Nekko fox]: *shoots Dark Horse*


Alright, glue and dog food for everyone, free of charge!


*Everyone cheers*


But there is a four hundred dollar charge for silverwear.


*there is a smaller amount of cheering*
2011-07-30 [Lord Josmar]: *Helps self to the adhesive dog food products.*


Thank god I raided Taco Bell's forks and spoons last night.
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: However, we also have plastic fork and knives available... for FREE!


*cheering resumes*


Oh, and there's a small shipping and handling fee of $400. And fifty cents. And one Albanian dime.


*the crowd glares*
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright, alright... no Albanian dime required!


*cheering starts back up again*
2011-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in in a UPS outfit*... *approaches the register*...


Ay, yo, I gots a package here for you.


*starts doing crotch thrusts, while techno music plays and strobe lights flash, and points at his genitals*


*music and lights stop*... *pulls a little package out of his pocket*...


Yeah, I'mma need you to sign for this... *holds out a clipboard*
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... deliveries go around ba-


Oh, wait! This is an actual delivery for once! Yeah, those go in my office. *points at the third bathroom on the right*


*bites off a chunk of his index finger and signs the clipboard in blood*
2011-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Uh... yeah, yeah, that's nice and all, but, uh... we got one of them electronic signin' dealies now... *holds up the Electro Signer 3000*


*wipes off the bloody piece of paper that was on the clipboard* This here was my daughter's field trip permission form... which you seem to have written, "Fuck the Jews! Hail Satan!" on anyway for some reason...
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Mmm hmm... mmm hmm... yeah, deliveries go around back.


*goes back to reading the newspaper*
2011-07-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: NOW LISTEN HERE, YOU-


Aw, sweet! A sale on woman's shoes! *points at a Beetle Baily comic*
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Mmm hmm... *tries to turn the page with his index finger, but cannot, as most of it is gone*... *uses the middle finger instead*...
2011-07-30 [Alexi Ice]: *Wanders in after a long absence*


I wasn't aware that the train had just derailed into crazy-ville. And so early in the morning, no less! Watson! Where's my tea you sniveling shit?
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: "I say!"
2011-07-30 [Stephen]:   
2011-07-30 Mystin: How is emo bad?...idiot.
2011-07-30 [Lord Josmar]: Which is better, emo grass or regular grass?


Emo grass! Because it cuts itself!
2011-07-30 [Lord Josmar]: 
2011-07-30 [Paul Doyle]: *Pauly the Anthro-Dragon wanders in and says, "grawwawwrr??"*
2011-07-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You people ruin a good conversation like our mailman ruins a picnic. *points at Turkey doing crotch thrusts into a screaming family's potato salad*


Stop picking on poor, little Mystin. Seriously, we don't do that sort of thing here. *punches Misty in a fit of rage* I mean, picking on the same person over and over?! It's disgraceful! Disgusting! Deplorable! Demoralizing! Dugout! Dugtrio! GAH!! *shoves Misty down some stairs*... *an earthquake rocks the diner, as well as the entire tri-state area*...
2011-07-30 [Nekko fox]: *Misty's tumbling ass creates a giant earthquake*


*It's Super Effective*


*China faints*
2011-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *Misty's ass gains 427xp*... *Misty's ass evolves into a truck*...
2011-07-31 Mystin: YAY I'M BACK!!!!
2011-07-31 [Nekko fox]: *Misty's Ass learned "Thunder Thighs"*
2011-07-31 [Thunder Cid]: You rang.
2011-07-31 [Nekko fox]: "Thighs" Cid. "Thighs".
2011-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *Cid, the chicken delivery boy, looks depressed and picks up his box of wings*... *he returns the box to his chicken van and picks up a box of thighs instead*...
2011-08-01 [Nekko fox]: *smacks Cid the chicken delivery boy in the face* WHERE ARE MY GIBLETS?
2011-08-01 [Thunder Cid]: Giblets weren't on the order sheet. You gotta problem take it up with the lump who orders yo food. Now sign here *hold up power of attorney/relinquishment of soul sheet*
2011-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *bites off a chunk of his middle finger and signs in blood, as is standard procedure here, apparently*
2011-08-01 [Nekko fox]: *screams in pain*


YOU BIT OFF MY FINGER YOU SONOVABI- oh wait, no, that's Cid the Chicken Delivery Boy's finger. Yeah, delivery is in the back. Ask for "Paco". He'll be the weeping Cubano orphan covered in his own waste.
2011-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: At least, most of it is his. The toilet in the bathroom was broken, you see...


"No it wasn't! It was working fine, you bastard!"


YES IT WAS, PACO, THERE WAS A HOLE IN THE BOTTOM AND ALL THE WATER KEPT DRAINING OUT. *spits out the piece of finger at Paco*
2011-08-01 [Thunder Cid]: WHY HAVEN"T YOU CALLED FOR HELP! *passes out from blood loss*
2011-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from newspaper*


Yeah, deliveries go around back.
2011-08-01 [Nekko fox]: *Leans in to Paco* Remember Paco? When YOU used to handle deliveries? That was before you got lazy and died a couple of times. Now sit down and be quiet, you smell awful.


*Pours some bleach on him before leaving the room as it reacts with the waste to create toxic gas*
2011-08-01 [Flisky]: *props feet on the passed out form of Cid, otherwise ignores everything else in favor of the really old newspaper*
2011-08-02 Mystin: NON-CHARACTER: Why did you and Cid stop talking to me?
2011-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a shame...


               Satan likes this.
2011-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Stop that, Satan! Go back to Myspace!
2011-08-02 Satan: Never!
2011-08-02 Mystin: 
2011-08-02 [Jewl]: Speaking of trains... *still on the train tracks as a tiny toy train bumps her repeatedly in the ribs*
2011-08-02 [Lord Josmar]: Oh, sorry about that.


*Duct tapes tazer to front of train with trigger activated.*


There that's much better.
2011-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh my gosh! What are you doing?! *rushes over to the tracks*


*maces Jewl in the face and kicks her in the spine*


Stop fidgeting! You're warping my track!
2011-08-02 [Nekko fox]: *Hands Mort a taser*


These work better to keep people from flopping Mort. You remember the PSA.
2011-08-03 [kians mummy]: Reports on the guards
2011-08-03 [Nekko fox]: *Sniffs the air* Is that bullshit?


Oh, no, just a crappy wiki.


*spritzes some Febreze on the food that's still being eaten*
2011-08-03 [kians mummy]: *steals off of you and eats it*
2011-08-03 [Nekko fox]: *shrugs*


I didn't need that. After all, it's filled with H2S04 anyway.


*The food, and Sammie H's gut start melting away. A few people begin screaming as their insides burn away. Several people, thinking this is a new B's D game, begin cheering them on to see who would scream louder*
2011-08-03 [Stephen]: Ah, poor people eating out here.
At least I'll be able to put flowers on their graves.   
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you dare put flowers in the soup. That would just be disgusting.
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: Daisies in your soup would be nice, don't you think?
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: NO. DO YOU WANT DAISIES IN YOUR RECTU- Yes, little boy, we have ice cream! Stop asking! -M?!


*[NOOOPE] looks up from his bowl of ice cream*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: *smiles and pats Mort on the back*
2011-08-04 [Nekko fox]: *Throws confetti into the air*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: Ah, a heartwarming moment at Bob's.


*waits for the resulting chaos, death, doom and devastation*
2011-08-04 [Nekko fox]: *Chaos, Death, Doom and Devastation walking, chuckling and sharing jokes, taking seats by the bar and urine samples*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: *chuckles*
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, you people stay away from my bar. I just had that polished. *takes bar and puts it back in the handicap stall*
2011-08-04 [Nekko fox]: *the poor handicapped chap who was peeing into a catheter bag in the handicap stall was inadvertently crushed to death. No one seemed to mind*
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *scoots the body under the door into the next stall, where some guy starts screaming and being a little bitch*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: *acts like a therapist, trying to calm down the freaked out screaming man*
2011-08-04 [Nekko fox]: *The screaming man claws through the plaster and piping until he hits the electrical wiring at which point his screaming hits a high pitch, cuts off, and the lights flicker mysteriously*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: Ah.. damn. Oh well, at least I tried. Now I get to put even more flowers on a grave.   
2011-08-04 [Nekko fox]: Keep those out of the soup!


*Tosses something smoking and looking like charred, human-shaped jerky into the soup pot*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: Hm, must be from the man who just made the lights flicker. Well, as they always say, "Waste not want not."   
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *a group of people look up*


"We never said that! Stopping telling people we said that!!" *they pick up baseball bats and approach menacingly*


*they head out back to the batting cages and hit some balls to practice for Saturday's big game against Joe's Restaurant down the street*
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *interns scream as they are struck violently in the balls*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: Oh my. Mort, what kind of establishment do you run around here?   
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Establishment? ...Run? ...Do? ......comma?
2011-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: One way or another, we're gonna BEAT that Joe's Restaurant! Whether it's on the field or in the testicles, we aren't gonna give up! Right, men?!


*the ball team shrugs and gives up*
2011-08-04 [Lord Josmar]: http://nyan.cat/?f=1



Go here and be nyaned!


*Cocks Shotgun and points it at uninterested folk*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: That song and video disturbs me on some deep, deep level..
2011-08-04 [Stephen]:








































































































































































2011-08-04 Mystin: WTF?!
2011-08-04 [Paul Doyle]: CloudBoobs! Suck them.
  

2011-08-04 [Nekko fox]: *A few cloud babies suckle the cloud boobs before an evil breeze shreds them*
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: Ah, I just love the fresh spring air. It smells so much of life.   
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: 
That's roughly 13 hours of non-stop Nyan. :P
2011-08-04 [Paul Doyle]: Thanks for the mammaries?
2011-08-04 [Stephen]: It gave me the desire to go kill a cat. >_>
2011-08-04 [kians mummy]: wow, this is hard to do, listen to it, watch it, deal with it, so annoying, but i'll keep on
2011-08-04 [kians mummy]: 1028 secons, can't do anymore
2011-08-05 [Nekko fox]: Like said before. I just ripped the song from youtube, stuck it on repeat, and played it nonstop.
2011-08-05 [kians mummy]: cool
2011-08-05 Mystin: [@190782] it wasn't necessary to apologize, if people don't speak out, change will never happen!
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: Mystin: I think there's a difference between speaking out, and making a fool of yourself.
Hopefully, Sammie has realized that difference. You haven't seemed to have learned it yet. (I vaguely wonder if you ever will.)
2011-08-05 [Lord Josmar]: ^
^
So says the banned man.
2011-08-05 Mystin: They're probably right. [@190782] if you act like me you'll just get banned to.
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: Yes, Sammie H, if you insult people, make pages that are directed against the crew, and otherwise try to shove your opinion down peoples' throats using a rusty pitchfork instead of in a normal way, there's a good chance someone will eventually ban you.


I hear if you want to improve Elftown, ERA is a good place to start. :)
2011-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Bazinga
2011-08-05 Mystin: STOP FUCKING PRETENDING TO BE ME YOU DUMB BITCHES!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: SAMMIE YOU KNOW ME AND YOU KNOW I SAY TO STAND UP FOR YOURSELF, ALWAYS!!! FUCK ERA, A DEAD WIKI NO ONE GOES TO BUT SYLFIE
2011-08-05 Mystin: BUT SRSELY DON'T DO THE DUMB SHIT IDID OR YOU WILL REGRAT IT LIKE I DO!!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: THE 2s MYSTIN IS NOT ME!!!!!!!!!!! FOR ONE, I CAN SPELL
2011-08-05 Mystin: EVEN IF I DON'T USE PUNCTUATION BESIDES !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: If you are indeed the real Mystin, and not someone pretending to be him, then you are an idiot. If you are not Mystin and simply someone pretending to be him, then disregard that comment. :)
2011-08-05 j@y!: Not this drama again....
2011-08-05 Mystin: I'm not the fake
2011-08-05 j@y!: yeah...ok
2011-08-05 The Real Mystin: I'm definitely the real Mystin!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: He's lying!!! I'm the real Mystin
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: You're always the fake.
2011-08-05 Mystin: NO IT'S MEE!!!!!
2011-08-05 j@y!: Will the real mystin please stand up and walk your ass out of the diner?!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: SAMMIE DON'T LISTEN TO THEM LISTEN TO ME!!!


DON'T DO WHAT I DID!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: I'M NOT GOING ANYWHERE, WHY SHOULD I?!!
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: There is no real Mystin, other than [Mystin]. Who is banned. Therefore, there is no real Mystin to speak of.
2011-08-05 j@y!: Sammie they're both batshit crazy!!! o.O
2011-08-05 Mystin: *kicks [@153213]...report me bitch*
2011-08-05 Mystin: THAT'S RIGHT I'M BANNED!!!
BUT I STILL COME BACK HERE TO HARASS YOU BECAUSE I'M AN IDIOT!!!
2011-08-05 j@y!: Ommm!!! I'm telling!!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: Why the hell would I call myself an idiot?
2011-08-05 j@y!: This is so frickin confusing...
2011-08-05 Mystin: I AM THE REAL MYSTIN. ONLY I HAVE THE ANSWERS HE WOULD HAVE.
2011-08-05 j@y!: Like what?! lol
2011-08-05 Mystin: CAN'T YOU GUYS STOP PRETENDING TO BE ME?!!!!


THERE CAN ONLY BE ONE ME AND THAT'S ME!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: I don't know, ask me something...no matter how personal?
2011-08-05 j@y!: Ok, are you and Ian the same person?
2011-08-05 Mystin: ....WHO?!
2011-08-05 j@y!: OMG IT'S REALLY HIM GUYS!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: That's right!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: THE FAKE BOYFRIEND I MADE UP TO SEEM LESS PATHETIC?
YES I AM HIM.
BUT THAT ACCOUNT GOT BANNED TOO.
2011-08-05 mystin: SO YEAH I AM THE REAL ONE!
2011-08-05 j@y!: *Runs up to Mystin and pies him in the face* YOU BASTARD!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: WTF?!!!
2011-08-05 The 1 and only Mystin: SAMMIE I LOVE YOU!
2011-08-05 j@y!: You cheated on me!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: THAT'S TRUE!
2011-08-05 The 1 and only Mystin: MY FAKE BF DOESN'T SATISFY ME AND NEITHER DO YOU!
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: Holy shit. >.<
2011-08-05 j@y!: YOU MAKE ME SICK MYSTIN!!!
2011-08-05 Mystin: I made you do a lot things....nothing that made you sick last time I checked.
2011-08-05 j@y!: OMG I should get myself checked, this fake bf could have infected me through YOU!!!! *runs to the walk in clinic across from bob's diner*
2011-08-05 Mystin: Ugh......ok.
2011-08-05 Mystin: AIDS ARENT CONTAGIOUS!!
2011-08-05 j@y!: ...K, were in the clear but your still an asshole!
2011-08-05 Mystin: FUCK YOU FAKE MYSTIN AKA ALEXI BITCH. I'LL COME DOWN TO DALLAS AND KICK YOUR ASS STUPID FUCKING DUMB SLUT.
2011-08-05 j@y!: ......WOW, showing your true colors tonight huh?
2011-08-05 Mystin: Sorry............*takes a deep breath*
2011-08-05 j@y!: Hey Mystin let's catch up even though you make sick, theres a smell in here I don't like...
2011-08-05 Mystin: J/K ALEXI!!!
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: ... Alexi Ice is sleeping.
2011-08-05 Mystin: IT'S PROBABLY MY STDS YOU'RE SMELLING.
2011-08-05 Mystin: My guess is that it's probably the dead bodies in the freezer...*throws fake mystins rotting body*
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: She's on my MSN, she went to sleep about three hours ago.
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: Wow...WTF did Alexi ever do? O.o
2011-08-05 j@y!: LOL.....wow..*waves* by "A-lex...fake mystin"
2011-08-05 Mystin: Oh let's roll and ignore the on lookers...they're just washed up trolls...
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: ...Says the banned member to the non-banned members. :P
2011-08-05 j@y!: I agree.......! *walks away with alter ego*
2011-08-05 Mystin: sings la la la.........SAMMIE: DO THE RIGHT THING. SERIOUSLY....
bye for now!
2011-08-05 j@y!: What are they talking about Mystin? Should I stay and listen?
2011-08-05 Mystin: To lies?! There's nothing to hear but a bunch of lies...none of the truly know me. NOT ONE.
2011-08-05 j@y!: It's just well...they might have a point?
2011-08-05 Mystin: They banned me for harassment but didn't give me any specifics.
2011-08-05 j@y!: I see.....well, can I just catch up with you later while I eat my rat fries at the bar?
2011-08-05 Mystin: *sigh*... FINE j at y! I'll see ya later.
2011-08-05 j@y!: K and thanks for not infecting me with being an asshole virus like you did to everyone else.
2011-08-05 Mystin: LOL...I would NEVER! C'ya j at y.
2011-08-05 j@y!: C'ya Mystin...*eat rat tail fries, dipping them in 4 year old rotten honey mustard* YUM!
2011-08-05 Mystin: *drives away on broken down moped and crashed into a trashcan and flys away*
2011-08-05 [Lord Josmar]: So...that was a good boost in the CPD! We may just make that friscal quota this quarter as long as the seven Mystins keep killing the wiki.
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: BUT AT WHAT COST? DEAR, SWEET SATAN, AT WHAT COST?!!


Oh, here it is, in the itemized bill. $27.50. That's not too bad, I guess. *starts counting out pennies*
2011-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Totally [Hedda]: You wanna play this game?! Oh, we'll play this game. Now you all lost username privileges.


Love,


[Hedda]


PS - I slob knob like corn on the cob.
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: Why aren't the usernames shown? O.o
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Ionno, magics? ...*eats ramen*...
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:  :P
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't think I don't recognize your tongue, Nio.
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: ;-;
*doesn't talk without usernames shown*
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: You discovered my secret identity. :/
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll talk when I tell you to talk, Simpet!
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you make no faces at me, Nio.   
2011-08-05 [Lord Josmar]:   


This one looks dirty...
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: *yawns*
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: That it does. That it does.
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
I make'a da face at you!
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: 
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:   
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-05 [Stephen]: The Amish Express looks a little dangerous.
2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: 
2011-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Lol * hugs all of the crazy Mystins* you guys crack me up!


Also! The real Mystin should know I dont live in dallas and (though i wish i had thought of it cuz its fucking hilarious) I am not, as has been stated, a mystin fake. Considering i have been asleep since now I dont see how thats possible.


Oh and feel free to visit me anytime <3 though i would obtain a few...erm...items before you do (like balls. And probably a bullet proof vest. Er..come to think of it that wont help. So yeahh! Come see me)
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   


  



  

2011-08-05 [Nioniel]: 
2011-08-05 [Stephen]:   
That reminds me OF Mystin.




And, Alexi woke up before I've even went to sleep...
2011-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Glad I woke up for my daily dose of dumb shit *Yawns*
2011-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   


  



  

2011-08-05 [Nioniel]:  Love that last one! :)
2011-08-05 [Alexi Ice]: Yeah, there was someone irritating screaming at me while I was trying to sleep. So I had to wake up! Amused now at the fact that I, by now fault of my own, seem to be winning the troll war as the fake Mystin's without even knowing it! Woot! I am ALL FUCKING POWERFUL!
2011-08-05 [Alexi Ice]:   


Hell has risen


  



Veiw your fate


  



Just as fangs


  



Would you die?
2011-08-05 Spirit of Mystin: Meesa channelin' the mojo of JarJar Binks! Meesa your humble servant. Meesa wanna show off what the true Spirit of Mystin can really do! By the Gods, it is certain! moi moi! The real mystin canna get rid o meesa cause me's the ultimate Spirit of Mystin! Oh boy oh boy!
2011-08-05 @Not logged in user@: 


LOL
2011-08-05 [Ninja Smurf]: oh look! A picture of Mort!
2011-08-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I WISH. That kid has an awesome dog... my dog is just a possum I found in a dumpster and isn't a dog at all...
2011-08-06 [Stephen]: *puts a giant pink bow on Mort's dog-thing and then dresses it in a tutu as well*   
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: 
2011-08-06 [Tekkon KinKreet]: what happens if i comment and im not a member per say?
2011-08-06 [Stephen]: You get hugs and love. Nioniel smothers you in so much huggly wuffly love that you melt into a pile of goo.
That I then use in my next cake. =]
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Savage rape? Per say.
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: /huge success. :(
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of piles of love goo... PACO! CLEAN OUT THE OUTHOUSE/MAKEOUT SHACK!
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: Love goo? What flavors does that come in?
2011-08-06 [Stephen]: @ [Tekkon KinKreet]
If you're really good, you get to go to the makeout shack with Mort.


... or maybe that's the super harsh punishment.. I don't remember which. Ah well.   
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: They come in all kinds of flavors, I guess, which is why we stopped storing all our flavors in the outhouse/makeout/orgy shack.
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Now the only thing they come in is Paco's locker.
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: Ohh. Do you have extra-large Love Goo?
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: "Que?!"


*Paco rushes away to his locker with a bottle of bleach*


Yes, I do have extra-large Love Goo. *whips out his extra-large dispenser*
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Sometimes you gotta beat this thing to make it work. It's got a couple of loose nuts.


*the dispenser breaks down and catches fire*


MY DISPENSER!!
2011-08-06 [Stephen]: Oh my. Time to roast marshmallows?   
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: One of my friends had a similar model and they had the same problems with it. They'd give it a few shakes and beat it a few times and all of a sudden, it would go up in flames.


Of course, after their dispenser was flaming, they no longer helped me out with the Love Goo hook-up, just other guy friends. :/
2011-08-06 [Nekko fox]: It's a flaming dispenser? WE DO NOT HAVE HOMOEROTIC DISPENSERS HERE!


*A few flamboyant dispenser shift nervously in their chassis*
2011-08-06 [Stephen]: This is Bob's Diner! We allow each and every dispenser to be their own unique selves without fear of prosecution. =3
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *an attorney bursts in and starts prosecuting dispensers*... *they lose their cool and their Love Goo and/or Pepsi turns room temperature*...
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: *spits room temperature Pepsi Goo on [9jlriexqk,ktpk]*
2011-08-06 [Stephen]: Hey, spitting isn't very nice. Give hugs, not.. saliva. =)
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *hugs [nokaredes], giving her AIDS*
2011-08-06 [Nioniel]: *takes [nokaredes]' AIDS and puts them back to work.*
Lazy bastards.
2011-08-06 Mystin: YAY! Were back on! <3
2011-08-06 TMZ: Can I have a show of hands of everyone who truly wants Mystin back?
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]:   



2011-08-06 Mystin: Alexi, seriously?
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *hides jar of hands*
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *also hides jars of feet and honey (damn bears)*
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: *Eats jar of hands*
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: MY JAR OF HANDS!
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: *Noms*


2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Did you have to eat the jar too? I could have used that to store buttons... *Mort's button pile continues being scattered across the table in his office/rape room*
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: Damn Mexicans and your crafty glass candy
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: STAY OUT OF MY DISCO BALL.
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: Never! *Smacks it with a baseball bat* *Repeatedly*
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]:   
2011-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: MY BASEBALL BAT! *snatches up the bat that is clearly labeled "Pillowthief's Bat"*
2011-08-06 [Nekko fox]: *Snatches up the disco ball, clearly labeled "Disco Ball". On the back was a hazmat sticker*
2011-08-06 [Avaz]: What's a "cherrios"?
2011-08-06 [Nekko fox]: Avaz makes a good point. *skewers Avaz with the Disco Ball/Hazmat Barrel. Several leading scientists are called in to explain this apparently impossible phenomena before they too are skewered on the orb*
2011-08-06 [Avaz]: *shudders to death from being skewered by a radioactive disco ball*


*shudders to undeath and shambles toward Nekko*
2011-08-06 [Nekko fox]: *Pushes Avaz down the stairs to the zombie basement*


Get back on your treadmill!
2011-08-06 [Alexi Ice]: http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&cp=6&gs_id=m&xhr=t&q=cheerios&;gs_sm=&gs_upl=&bav=on.2,or.r_gc.r_pw.&biw=1262&bih=608&um=1&;ie=UTF-8&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi
2011-08-06 [Paul Doyle]: *Sends in Olivia Newton singing "Physical" and the Village People singing "YMCA"*
*as a code of manhood honor, restrains Richard Simmons from joining [Avaz] on the basement zombie treadmill*
2011-08-06 [Nekko fox]: Alexi, look at the spelling in your picture above, then compare to the product linked in your google search.
2011-08-07 TMZ: Update: Mystin has released this official statement, which will be followed up by a YouTube video in the future. "TMZ, do you seriously think I would want to come back to a community that treated me like dirt and never once took me seriously? I put time, effort and dedication into my graphics, stories and art work...and for what? To be banned for harassment when and array of that is happening all the time in messages between the crew and normal member's. I am sorry, but I have class and I'm not going to stay or return to a place that doesn't honor my work, time and dedication. I made a fatal mistake by misrepresenting myself in pictures, but that is all. I have never mistreated anyone ill unless they antagonized the situation. One more thing, I don't anyone from Elftown on my YouTube because that's my place to get away. If I have a video I want you to see, you'll hear it from me first. I'm not going to come back and hide because me being banned was a kayfabe basically because this community lost a valuable person and I know they want to bring me back. I'm sorry, you won't get the opportunity to use for graphics and kick me to the curb again. I'm sorry, you simply won't".
2011-08-07 j@y!: This damn mosquito is trolling.


it’s been flying around me for 5 minutes and it’s pissing me off.


*swats Mystin*
2011-08-07 [Alexi Ice]: Lol i know they want to bring me back!! Ha
2011-08-07 [Stephen]: You know, I personally didn't think Mystin's graphics were that damn amazing. o_o
I mean, they're better than something I could do, but many Elftown members are pretty damn good artists.


No offense to whatever not-logged-in-user is Mystin. =P
2011-08-07 Mystin: *takes a deep breath* Listen Simpet, wtf kinda sn is Simpet? Anyway, you have no idea how hard it is to make a graphic so shut it.
2011-08-07 [Flisky]: I'm sure Simpet knows about making graphics...
2011-08-07 Mystin: "You are the hottest troll I have ever seen. I love you." -Anonymous


THANK YOU TO ALL MY ADORING FANS! I LOVE YOU TOO!!! <3
2011-08-07 [Flisky]: They see you trollin', they hatin'...Okay, even I can't finish typing that.
2011-08-07 [Nioniel]: :P
2011-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Why have we become so infested with council members lately? *reaches for the Spray®*
2011-08-07 [Lord Josmar]: Lolz. Its a COUP!!!!!!


*Points at a Coup DeVille in the parking lot*
2011-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: MY COUP!


Oh wait, nothing happened to it.


*returns to his newspaper*
2011-08-07 [Flisky]: I was here before I was a council member. :P
2011-08-07 [Lord Josmar]: Me too!...
Wait...
2011-08-07 Mystin: It's like WTF? Why do I have to be official on here, people like me and if they don't it's like a tv show. Characters come and go and people like them and some don't, but unless turkey or mort decided to unexport this page, it's my right to come is it not?
2011-08-07 [Nekko fox]: *starts spritzing the infestation of council monkeys and drama*


Damn, this shit is bad. We might have to get one of those awesome little circus tents and fill it with insecticide....




Which, in retrospect, sounds awesome. I'm calling the exterminator.


*Picks up a banana and starts to eat it sensually*
2011-08-07 [Lord Josmar]: *Walks in eating a bag of circus peanuts and wearing a hazmat suit*


Alright, I just gased the circus tent like you wanted. Barnum and Bailey's has a bad animal problem.
2011-08-07 [Alexi Ice]: That's crazy guy in the corner is talking to himself again


*Mumbles to myself* Yes, master, good master *Bows down to Simpet* MAAAASSSSTTTTTEEEERRRR
2011-08-07 Mystin: I just wanted to kindly say, Fuck you [@32014]. K, thanx bye.
2011-08-07 [Lord Josmar]: *Looks around confused*


Doormat isnt here.
2011-08-07 j@y!: Those of you saying Mystin's graphics suck don't know his work very well. Check out [RPMC Steampunk@wiki]
2011-08-07 [Nekko fox]: I WILL CHECK OUT NOTHING!


*smashes the books from the hands of an elderly librarian woman who promptly breaks down into tears. Partly because those books belonged to her late husband, but mostly because he brittle wrists crumbled under the superior power of Nekko's powerful onslaught*


*Goes back to eating his banana*
2011-08-07 [Top_Hatter]: *walks in, stares at everyone, adjusts hat, then orders the "Special", then to no one specific, asks aloud:* ..."Did I miss anything of importance?"
2011-08-07 [Paul Doyle]: It sure has been "special" here lately, all right.
2011-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Barnum and Bailey's was hosting a Bar Mitzvah at the time of the gassing. I don't think the Jewish community is going to like this... I had better call them to apologize...


*picks up a phone and starts to eat it sensually*
2011-08-07 [Aliz]: Need salt?
2011-08-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: No silly, the salty taste comes at the end
2011-08-07 [Stephen]: o_O'
Creepy crazy man in the corner. Perhaps he'd like one of the decadent dishes this fine diner has to offer..
2011-08-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: This diner is fine? And offers decadent dishes? *looks around* Am I in the right place?
2011-08-07 [Aliz]: no =0 you're supposed to be across the street!
2011-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: ...Working the corner!


*pimp slaps Dainty Delusive Doll*


It was with an open hand, so it's okay. *takes the spike studded glove off*
2011-08-08 MystinforCrew: Please go to [Mystin for Crew@wiki] to read [@58061] 's goodbye open letter to Elftown. Thank you all for 7 amazing years. - The Mysterium Network
2011-08-08 [Lord Josmar]: Ok, see you tomorrow then.
2011-08-08 [Alexi Ice]: Jos - always the voice of reason. Lol
2011-08-08 [Ninja Smurf]: I don't want to go anywhere, and no one can make me! *Ninja vanishes into the broken oven*
2011-08-08 [Nekko fox]: WHY DO PEOPLE WANT ME TO READ THINGS?!


*Goes back to his 'How to Overcome Illiteracy' seminar. He helps a few third-world children who are having difficulty comprehending the concepts such as consonants. Volunteering to help the needy is beneficial for everyone.*


*He then remembers that this is stupid and promptly sets the entire building on fire using kerosene-doused hookers*
2011-08-08 [Stephen]: *Goes back to his 'How to Overcome Illiteracy' seminar. He helps a few third-world children who are having difficulty comprehending the concepts such as consonants. Volunteering to help the needy is beneficial for everyone.*


*Swells with pride over Nekko's statement*
2011-08-08 [Nekko fox]: *Walks away from the torched remains of the building, wisps of smoke curling up from his charred "Volunteer" badge that now had nasty graffiti over the majority of it, lewd pictures taped to the rest*


Hm?
2011-08-08 [kians mummy]: Hi mystin
2011-08-09 [Paul Doyle]: Drives up again, in a chintz-mobile. "Pardon me . . . would you have any Grey Poupon?"
2011-08-09 [Stephen]: Just a spoon full of sugar will help the medicine go down   
2011-08-09 [Alexi Ice]: Made 347 seconds into Nyan cat before I developed a twitch in my right hand. Good time, I guess? My ears are still ringing...
2011-08-09 [Top_Hatter]: You masturbate to Nyan-cat?
2011-08-09 [Alexi Ice]: Doesn't everyone?
2011-08-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: yes. I do.
2011-08-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Whats Nyan-cat?
2011-08-09 [Lord Josmar]: 0___0
2011-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Why do you people keep talking about listening to Nyan Cat like it's a challenge or something? I have a loop of it I playing 24/7 and it nyan hasn't affected me at all, nyan. *eats poptart*... STOP MEOWING, DAMMIT!!
2011-08-09 [Stephen]: Nyan Cat is the youtube video above this comment box on the page. =]


*burns ramen*
2011-08-09 [Lord Josmar]: It is the latest internet craze.


*Feeds ramen to starving Ethiopians*
2011-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *some buzzards look upset and fly away*
2011-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: A bear woke up from his annual hibernation to find that his stomach was growling.
"I sure am hungry," the sleepy bear said.
So he found some berries, but spit them out.
"These berries are far too bitter," the playful bear said.
He then found some honey, however was soon bombarded with a swarm of bees.
"That honey is good, but not that good," the jolly bear said.
He then stumbled upon a cabin.
"I wonder if there is any food in here..." the courteous bear wondered.
The events that followed are now referred to by the locals as the May 20th Massacre. While no witnesses survived, the police reports depict that the Martinez family, a young family of 7 enjoying their memorial day weekend in their New Hampshire cabin, was brutally slain by a blood-thirsty animal who tracked each of them throughout the house in a period of approximately 45 minutes.
2011-08-10 [Lord Josmar]: Lolz. I was wondering when it was going to go south.


*Sits in his story-blind as the stories migrate south for the summer. Pops up and blasts one out of the sky before sending his dog to go amd retrieve it.*
2011-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-10 OfficialMystin: http://youtu.be/Ja5ueH6g_4Y
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Finally, a mention of Bob's Diner! *people everywhere cheer, not because of the mention, but because Chester just jumped a ramp and did a wicked awesome flip on his bike*


*Chester, unfortunately, doesn't stick the landing and breaks his leg*... *an ambulance arrives and carries him away on a stretcher*... *millions wait in anxious anticipation for him to be released from the hospital*...


*Mort is unaware of any of this and goes about eating ramen and vigorously and angrily masturbating at traffic as per his usual routine*
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-11 [Lord Josmar]:   
2011-08-11 [Top_Hatter]: ...at least he has a very cute peter 0_o
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-11 [Jewl]: Hilarious
2011-08-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Mortal Kombat! I used to love playing that *Punches Mort in the nuts*
2011-08-11 [Nekko fox]: I love nuts!


*Punches Mr. Peanut in the junk*
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: MY NUTS!


*weeps over the crumbled remains of a variety of nuts from almond to lug*
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Only 19 more days until the end of the friscal year! Comment more or I'm docking your paychecks!


*makes a boat out of Nekko's paycheck and ties it to a tiny pier in the sink*
2011-08-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I never got paid, you bitch.


*Ties Mort's pride and joy to a nearby train.*
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Odd, two comments ago we had 34444 comments. Now we only have 34441 comments. Damn you, [Elftron]!
2011-08-11 [Flisky]: *makes a comment on commenting* I think commenting is overrated.
2011-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I think thinking overrated things are overrated is overrated.
2011-08-11 [Stephen]:
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2011-08-12 [Stephen]: /done
=]
2011-08-12 [Lord Josmar]: http://quotes.oldwarez.com/
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: ......Though, I feel I should mention, we do take pride in the quality of our comments here at Bob's Di-


NO, MA, YOU HAD THE SPOON LAST! I AIN'T TOOK IT SINCE WEDNESDAY, WHEN WE HAD TO SCOOP THEM POSSUMS OUTTA THE TRAPS!


-ner. Only the finest comments are accepted here. All others are also accepted, but not as much.
2011-08-12 [Stephen]: Does that mean I should delete my blank spam? :3
2011-08-12 [Thunder Cid]: to the spamatorium
2011-08-12 [Nioniel]: I prefer to snack on maps, much healthier than spam as it's quite the opposite.
2011-08-12 [Lord Josmar]: I DONT LIKE SPAM!


Don't like Spam? Why I love it! I'm having the Eggs, Spam, Spam, Spam, Bacon, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Sausage, cheese, with Spam, Spam, Spam, and Spam, with extra Spam.


*Growing singing in the background*


Spam, Spam, Spam, Spam, Amazing Spam! The wonderful Spam!
2011-08-12 [Thunder Cid]: Silence you we need those comments noaw!
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no. It's fine. The men will come soon enough and take it away to the spam bank (not to be confused with the sperm bank).
2011-08-12 [Nioniel]: Crap...they're not the same thing? :O
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Apparently not. The spam bank gets rather displeased with me when I try to donate sperm. And I don't think the sperm bank really appreciates getting spam either.
2011-08-12 [Nioniel]: Goddammit, a donation is a motherfucking donation!
2011-08-12 [hanhepi]: here's my comment (to help out the economy).
2011-08-12 [hanhepi]: and another one, just because i'm feeling generous today.
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: And one more, because I like throwing hanhepi into our possum pit.


*Throws hanhepi bodily into a pit full of ravenous, bloodthirsty possum. If you don't starve them well and then gorging them, the meat becomes too tender, and we can't have tender meat here at Bob's Diner*
2011-08-12 [hanhepi]: are these possums, or opossums?
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: Actually, they're pine martens. We just call it a possum pit to impress the neighbors...


*there are no neighbors within 400 kilometers of this god-forsaken stretch of road*


...And our loyal customers.


*there are folks screaming and smashing their fists against the reinforced, shatter-proof windows and door, begging to be let out because they haven't seen their family in six months*
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes strolling in the one-way door with a sack of fresh loyal customers*


Where do you want these?


*looks up from his book*


Deliveries go around back.


Oh, thanks man. *heads around back with the screaming sack of customers (no doubt screaming praises for Bob's Diner's new two-for-one shrimp sale, a sale in which one customer receives two shrimp for $600)*


*goes back to reading his book on dissociative identity disorders*
2011-08-12 [Alexi Ice]: *Stabs someone* (Probably the janitor)
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: No Alexi, you just stabbed yourself.
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: Just like the spoiled ending of that shit movie...


Black Swan




  

2011-08-12 [Susie-Q]: Commenting to save the diner. <3
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: Save the what?
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: So... she was the janitor all this time... huh...


Hey, Paco, I'm sorry for shouting at you and kidnapping you and torturing you and raping you and killing your family and raping your family and killing your rape and kidnapping your killing and familying your torture and shouting at your Shout®. I thought you were the one responsible for not cleaning up all this mess. I hereby vindicate you, exonerate you, and clear you of all charges. You may go free now, little Paco! Freeee! *tosses his lifeless body into the sloppy joe maker*... *it malfunctions and splatters blood all over a group of screaming sixth graders on a field trip*...


Gross. Paco, clean that mess up... *goes back to showing the sixth graders a sexually explicit PowerPoint about the rise and fall of the friscal market with erotic graphs and numerous non sequitur rape scenes*
2011-08-12 [Nioniel]: Kids don't appreciate a good erotic graph enough these days.
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Nor do their parents, apparently. *starts boarding up the window holes as the protesters outside grow more belligerent*
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'LL GET YOUR KIDS BACK WHEN I GET MY SIGNED BABE RUTH BASKETBALL BACK!! *shoots tear gas out of a hole in the wall at the enraged and now confused crowd*
2011-08-12 [Eyonic]: *is part of the enraged then confused crowd*
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *is too somehow*
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Let us in!!


Not by the hairs on my chinny chin chin!


*rushes back out to reply to himself, but gets caught by the mob*
2011-08-12 [Nioniel]: *decides children are unpredictable hostages and starts gunning them down, along with the decaying spirit of mystin, which had never really left*


2011-08-12 [Top_Hatter]: I thought it was bad to say mys... you-know-who's name, because it would give them more power to come back from the dead...repeatedly, until like the 6th book where someone shoves a wand up his ass *hope I didn't ruin the ending*...anyway, are you going to just throw away the child-leavings or are they going in the sloppy-joe machine too?
2011-08-12 [Top_Hatter]: I ask, because my half-breed chihuahua/ostrich loves orphan meat, but I assume anything close will do. Speaking of...is orphan meat on the menu, or is it one of those black-market listed thingies you have to have a cool handshake and a password for?
2011-08-12 [{KEIRA}]: Commenting to save the diner <3<3<3
2011-08-12 [Paul Doyle]: Don't be a whiner, get food poisoned at Bob's Diner!
2011-08-12 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Don't be silly. You can get poisoned by more than just the food
2011-08-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Everybody who eats here, is gay. Either that, or just retarded.
2011-08-12 [Eyonic]: o.o ah damn, ya found me out :3
2011-08-12 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Bob is my son, and I pay all his bills. I kind of have a vested interested in the welfare of this diner, because everything that's his, I own! so I am helping him to keep the comments going. So, anyone up for conversational table tennis? Speak up!
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: Save the what?
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: And on that note, who plays table tennis anymore? That game is for dweebs.


*Several Dweebs, a short hairy species of pygmy with a disinterest for bathing, walk in to the diner and promptly set up a table for tennis and begin playing. No one pays them any mind and eventually one is stepped on*
2011-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Eww, what the heck? *scrapes the bottom of his shoe off on some woman's face (which wouldn't have happened had she been in the kitchen)*


Let that be a lesson to you, ma'am. *tips his hat and exits the kitchen*
2011-08-12 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you know damn well that we don't waste good dweeb here at B's D.


*throws the woman with dweeb on her face into the soup. She screams and melts T1000-style*
2011-08-13 [Sheamus Finn]: Think she'll be back? *tosses T800 model in for good measure*
2011-08-13 [Nekko fox]: *the T800 makes a whirring-clicking noise before discharging forty missiles into the compact confines of the Diner. Many people are messily exploded into cheap cat food, which is promptly sold as a medical miracle to orphans with diabetes. Many more die because of this*
2011-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts peddling homemade dog food as a cure for the ailments caused by the cat food*


*by the grace of the one true, holy, white God, Jesus H. Christ of Nazarus, the dog food actually works and many people start recovering, prompting the FDA to burst in and start shooting up the place for not going through the proper channels to make and sell this new miracle cure*... *hundreds of billions of people die, causing Mort to question his own counting abilities*... *realizing that counting isn't a necessary skill in this particular business, Mort goes back to giving incorrect change at the register, causing Bob's Diner to make tens of trillions of dollars, all of which fits safely inside Mort's skin flap*...
2011-08-13 [Jewl]: /ZMOBIE (Typo on purpose)
2011-08-13 [Aliz]: with chocolate and banana flavor? :D
2011-08-13 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: AND SPRINKLES?!
2011-08-13 [Nekko fox]: The previous comments made up to Mort's own are unnecessary and cause malnutrition in infants.


*starts visiting daycares and nurseries with the comments and sell them off as immune-system bolstering vitamins. He keeps the proceeds in Mort's skin flap*
2011-08-13 [Eyonic]: *wonders what else fits in that skin flap...*
2011-08-13 [Aliz]: SHOES? :D
CLOWN SHOES?
2011-08-13 [Top_Hatter]: ...complete with clowns...I wonder how many clowns can fit in that skin flap...*ponders*
2011-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *reaches into his skin flap and pulls out... another skin flap!*
2011-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: No, wait. That was a kidney.


If anyone needs me, I'll be at the hospital. *hotwires Pillowthief's car and drives it to/into the local ice cream parlor/debauchery dive*
2011-08-14 [Nekko fox]: My bike!


*Watches Mort ride off on a little pink tricycle with streamers on the bars*


I was going to pick up my date in that sweet ride!


*the tricycle has a little license plate that read "Bitches" on the back*
2011-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *the tricycle catches on fire, along with all the cocaine and dead hookers in the trunk*
2011-08-14 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Damn. A trike with streamers, a license plate, cocaine, dead hookers and a trunk? Does it have a hemi?
2011-08-14 [Aliz]: Watch out for the moose :(
2011-08-14 [Nekko fox]: *The tricycle (now ablaze) slams into the moose with a horrible grinding crunch, buckling the moose's legs and sending the poor creature up in a ball of fire, the smoke reeking of burning hair and smoked moose steaks. Wolves gather and drag off the charred remains of the hooker and what few bags of cocaine were left. They planned on making a party out of this night, police be damned*
2011-08-15 [Aliz]: *drags away the moose steaks* RAWR
2011-08-15 [Lord Josmar]: *Several wild Canadians follow Aliz like hyenas, hoping to be able to dine on the moose steak leftovers. Their yipping "Eh?" calls can be heard for milea around.
2011-08-15 [Aliz]: *eats the moose steaks AND the wild Canadians*
2011-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: NNNOOOOOO!! SARAH PALIN!!
2011-08-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *holds a funeral service that doesn't have a casket, or a funeral director, or is in a funeral home, but is actually at a strip club with strippers and isn't a funeral service at all, but more of a visit to a strip club*
2011-08-15 [Aliz]: *starts eating the strippers* >:3
2011-08-15 [Top_Hatter]: *shudders as he watches Mort "motorboat" a pair of man-tits at the "funeral service" in which Sarah Palin has been duck-taped upside down and naked on a stripper pole*
2011-08-16 [Sheamus Finn]: Quick anyone got a paintball gun?
2011-08-16 [Lord Josmar]: No, but I do have this.


*Hands over chainsaw.*


They are similar though, when you hit someone with either you have this liquid that spurts everywhere.
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Pfft, that's an old wive's tale.


*shoots a stripper with the chainsaw. Nothing comes out except compressed gas*


See? Nonsense.
2011-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, nonsense.


*starts wiping up the liquid he just spurt everywhere*
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you know deliveries go in the back.
2011-08-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Funny. That's exactly what Sarah Palin said right before she died
2011-08-16 [Lord Josmar]: That is hilarious.


*Laughs as I nonchalantly stuff corpse into trunk.*
2011-08-16 [Aliz]: *stuffs trunk into corpse* this isn't working =/
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: *the corpse unstuffs itself from the trunk and, grumbling about people not knowing how to stuff corpses into trunks anymore, walks over to some patrons and begins messily devouring brains*
2011-08-16 [Aliz]: *tries stuffing trunk into a living person instead* This isn't really working well either =/
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: *The person screams, cries, and begs to be let go. Nekko gestures vaguely over his shoulder*


Corpses in the back.
2011-08-16 [Aliz]: Allrighty! *throws person half-stuffed with trunk back with the corpses and finds a new victim* I'm getting better at this! :D
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: *Gestures vaguely over his shoulder*


Good feelings go with the corpses.
2011-08-16 [Jewl]:   
2011-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *Gestures wildly in the air, knocking out a passing seagull*


Gestures go in the back with the good feelings.
2011-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Cats go in the soup. Which goes in the back. *splashes hot soup on some guy's back*
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: *smacks Mort with the seagull*


SEAGULLS GO IN THE BATMOBILE.


*Gently sets the seagull in a miniature batmobile, one wheel missing due to a popular, satirical version of a Crimbo song*
2011-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *guy whose back got burnt from the soup starts screaming*


Sir, I'm gonna have to ask you to please stop screaming. This is a friendly, family restaurant. If you want to scream, go to the back with the corpses and gestures and good feelings and cat soup. *he gets up and walks slowly to the back, taking a moment now and then to stop and curse God for his pain*... *he trips over the seagull in the tiny Batmobile and lands on his burnt back and starts screaming again*...


THAT DOES IT, BUDDY. YOU'RE OUTTA HERE! *nothing happens*


Say, what happened to our bouncer/rapist?
2011-08-16 [Nekko fox]: I think he wandered into Zombie Bay 6/Y, down the east corridor. I heard him screaming for help, to be let out, that sort of thing, but I left him in there. I thought if he couldn't be bothered to read the "Do Not Enter" signs, then I can't be bothered to help.


*He indicates a sign above a poorly lit, dank metal hallway from whence low, groaning and snarling could be heard, an arrow pointing down into the recesses just beneath the words "Free hookers, booze, and guns*


That poor, stupid redneck...
2011-08-17 [Top_Hatter]: ..stupid rednecks go in the back. Smart rednecks own diners 0_o
2011-08-17 [Lord Josmar]: *Rimshot*


*At the end of aforementioned rimshot, the symbal flies off the holder amd slices down several customers at the "all-you-can-kill" booth.*
2011-08-17 [Avaz]: *reporter says* Latest reports confirm AMD, one of the world's leading manufacturer of computer parts, is now getting in on the drum cymbal market. For the full story, watch news at 11.
2011-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't think you people understand... we've got 13 days until the end of the friscal year! Comment! *goes back to not commenting for days at a time*
2011-08-17 [Nekko fox]: Niggers
2011-08-17 [Nekko fox]: Nigger bombs
2011-08-17 [Nekko fox]: Niggers stoled mah bikes.
2011-08-17 [Nekko fox]: OH SWEET GOOD GOOGLY EYED MOOGLES MY FEET ARE ON FIRE!
2011-08-17 [Nekko fox]: *Runs screaming into someone's soup*
2011-08-18 [Lord Josmar]: *Flags down waiter*


Excuse me, there is a person in my soup. I specifically order TWO people in my soup


*Throws bowl of soup (acid) into waiter's face*


Now go put the melted remains of your face in a bowl with oyster crackers and bring it out to me!
2011-08-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, sir. Very good, sir. *tries to walk toward the kitchen, but, lacking eyes and most of a face, stumbles and crashes into someone else's soup*
2011-08-18 [Lord Josmar]: *Sighs*


You can never find good help these days. Nor can you buy good help these days.


*Cracks a whip at a group of slaves from different ethnic backgrounds and therefore not racist in any way.*


I love doing that!
2011-08-18 [Top_Hatter]: *whinnies in delight and stamps hooves, counting the whip lashes*
2011-08-18 [Nioniel]: By gum, this horse is bearing gifts!
*grabs saddle-bags off of the the Hatter-Horse, which are filled with the decaying remains of the slaves of the slaves*


Fantastic, now I know what to make for dinner (pizza, obviously).


*immediately looks the gift horse directly in the mouth, defying all logic and somehow, grammar*
2011-08-18 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Slaves don't have slaves. Gee whiz, next you're going to tell me they're actually real people with thoughts and emotions XD
2011-08-18 [Nioniel]: Did I say slaves? I meant fleas. Whatever they were, they sure were delicious.
2011-08-18 [Nekko fox]: "The slaves (those not yet eaten) from multiple ethnic backgrounds look up at the mention of the word, "Flea", that having been the slave name given to all of them since the foreman was too lazy to name them anything else. Except for Toby, who was a well-to-do white boy who was kept in the freezer*
2011-08-19 [Alexi Ice]: http://ohinternet.com/Rules_of_the_Internet
2011-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: We're all aware of the rules. 'Cept Timmy. *starts to point in some random direction, but decides not to and goes back to reading porn/tending to customers behind the register*... Yes, ma'am, will that be cash or credit? CASH OR CREDIT?! *smashes a passing women with a brick and takes her purse*
2011-08-19 [Lord Josmar]: *Smashes Mort with a purse and takes his brick*


My brick!


*Runs away with brick to Nicaragua to have a highly illegal human/inanimate object wedding before divorcing the brick and taking half of its immense fortune. The brick kills itself three days later.*
2011-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: My face!


*Runs away with face to Nicaragua to have a highly illegal human/face wedding before divorcing the face and taking half of its immense fortune. The face kills itself three days later by overdosing on Botox and heroine based lotions.*
2011-08-19 [Lord Josmar]: Curse you Mr. 1up-er!


*Dropkicks green mushroom*
2011-08-19 [Mortified Penguin]: My green mushroom!


*starts to run away with the green mushroom to Nicaragua, before realizing this is completely stupid because it's a mushroom, not something you can be intimate with, like a brick or a face*... *laughs boisterously while mugging more customers*... *the mushroom, feeling rejected, kills itself three days later*...
2011-08-19 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *cuts up mushroom to add to green egg and ham omelette* The sadness really brings out that fungusy taste
2011-08-19 [Nekko fox]: MY GREEN EGGS! I don't care about the ham though.


AND WHY DOES THAT RULES OF THE INTERNET NOT HAVE RULES EXTENDING UP TO RULE 63? WELL?! WELL?!


*A well looks up from the ground it is snuggled down in, diverting its attention from the people who are desperately clambering for water in this dry, arid, god-forsaken location and turns to see Mort running off and doing nonsensical things*
2011-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his seat behind the register, where he was sitting and doing very sensible things*


Well, well, well. What do we have here?


No, seriously, what the heck is that thing? *moves away from the well*
2011-08-20 [Top_Hatter]: *looks up from the well* well?!...you gonna bring the lotion down again or what?
2011-08-20 [Nekko fox]: *The well sullenly nods and goes to retrieve the lotion*
2011-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Put the lotion in the basket!! *points at the basket well out of reach of Hop Tatter*
2011-08-20 [Nekko fox]: *The Well looks at the basket that is "well out of reach" of Pot Thater and heartily laughs. Then it realizes it is an inanimate object and promptly stops thinking anything. God materializes but realizes he is simply the fevered creation of millions of zealots, and promptly disappears in a poof of logic and common sense. Also, he didn't like how religious folk are batshit insane and he would have no part in that*
2011-08-21 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *throws a penny in the well. Not actually a penny, just some annoying Girl Scout named Penny*
2011-08-21 [Nekko fox]: *the well takes it like a well*
2011-08-22 [Top_Hatter]: *falls to the ground having been smacked by a penny*


My Penny!


*uses Penny's Girl Scout uniform to make a rope, ties it to her ankle and throws her out of the well, then climbs up the make-shift "rope" to escape the well*


Thank you, Penny!


*kicks the now naked girl scout back into the well, then dons her uniform and starts selling cookies*
2011-08-22 [Nekko fox]: MY COOKIES!
2011-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MY NAKED GIRL SCOUT! *dives into the well*


Huh. It would seem this is not the correct well. We really have too many wells in here. *waits for what he's sure will be a quick and speedy rescue from his many, many friends*
2011-08-22 [Nekko fox]: *There is no one around*
2011-08-22 [Delladreing]: < sound of silence> http://www.instantsfun.es/crikets < /sound of silence>
2011-08-22 [Flisky]: *tosses old newspaper into a random well and finds a new one*
2011-08-22 [Nekko fox]: *Brings in new 'customers' from another land, all chained together with the spark of hope extinguished from their eyes. He chains one to a post and starts whipping him*


Your customer name is TOBY!


*Bearing his surprisingly well-kept teeth and screaming in perfectly serviceable English, Toby respond*


"My name is Kunta Kinte!"


*Rolls his eyes*


Fine, but you have to be Toby on the weekends, for the kids.


*Kunta Kinte obliges before getting thrown into the diner/fields*
2011-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts picking cotton candy/fuzzy mold in the field*


Someday, we gonna be free... someday... *takes off shackles and enjoys a 15 minute break at the plantation water slide before returning to the grueling physical labor in the field*... *sips his wine glass*... Master, it seems the automatic cotton candy pickin' machine is on the fritz again... *kicks the automatic cotton candy pickin' machine in the ribs*... *it grunts, stands back up, and starts picking cotton candy again*... nevermind, I fixed it. *returns to his velvet throne atop the machine and resumes sipping wine*...


I can't wait until we's all free... someday... *sings folk songs*
2011-08-22 [Top_Hatter]: *the other ethnic slaves look at the water-slide and decide it is blasphemous and decide to build a pyramid slide*


...Fresh baked Girl Scout cookies for sale! Fresh baked...holy shit they build fast!


*Egyptian themed pyramid water-slide park opens almost immediately, and after careful negotiations, GSCookie Co. & E. Jipped Oasis Water Park merge companies under the stipulation that workers will all wear turban badges to show their ranks and cookie sales skills...and skirts*
2011-08-22 [Nekko fox]: Hey hey hey....We prefer to call them "antique farm equipment" rather than slaves. It has a nice Southern ring to it.


*Kicks some antique farm equipment in the ribs*


"Massah, I's workin' as hahd as ah can, sah!"


*Kicks him again, just because he likes kicking*
2011-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! HEY!


*looks down from atop his antique farm equipment*


Stop that! You're making me spill my lemonade!
2011-08-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: What? No mint juleps? All this antique farm equipment and no herb garden? What kind of establishment is this?
2011-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *floorboards and a wall segment collapse killing many customers and effectively answering that last question*
2011-08-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *uses antique farm equipment to gather broken floorboards for mulch. All antique farm equipment that complains of splinters is "recycled" into compost* Organic always tastes better. Especially with fresh organs
2011-08-23 [Nekko fox]: That's what she said.


And then she filed a lawsuit.
2011-08-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: And then she ended up in the compost pile too
2011-08-23 [Lord Josmar]: Which we then fed to the customers.


and then they filed a lawsuit.
2011-08-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Well that's your fault for feeding people compost. Just because it looks like the Soup of the Day
2011-08-23 [Lord Josmar]: No, they ordered the compost. They sued because it made them fat.


*Piles order of compost onto a plate with a warning label that read: "This is compost, it isnt health food, stupid."*
2011-08-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: NOOOOOOO! MY COMPOST! How will the mint grow now?
2011-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Poorly, I'd wager.
2011-08-23 [Top_Hatter]: I'll wager a slave on that wager *continues eating compost*
2011-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *Poorly, a British exchange student, glances around nervously as the mint starts growing*... *however, realizing that there was never actually a wager, just a question without conditions followed by non sequitur bids, Poorly sighs in relief at the poorly wagered wager and listens to some Wagner*
2011-08-24 [Littel Wolf]: Hey mort what job is open for hire?
2011-08-24 [Nekko fox]: Dick Wolf is open, we're doing interviews right now.


*A wolf with a bloody phallus in its mouth gets the job8


Oop, nevermind.
2011-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, hi, Mrs. Pillowthief! Congratulations on getting the job. I look forward to working with you. *Pillowthief's mom growls and, like most woman, looks lustfully at Mort's crotch*
2011-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We do still have an opening as a fry cook, though.


*a wolf with a bloody phallus in its mouth gets the job9


Oop, nevermind.
2011-08-24 [Nekko fox]: Well, what about busboy?


*a phallus with wolf's blood in its urethra gets the job10


Oop, nevermind.
2011-08-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh. How about just a bus?


*a blood with job11 in its phallus gets the wolf urethra


Oop, nevermind.
2011-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *looks up from his copy of the Newd Yorker (America's most high brow porn magazine)*


Th-those aren't jobs.
2011-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE not a job!
2011-08-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: Well, I'm only human. *laughs wittily and returns to his porno*


*robot arm falls off*


Goddammit!
2011-08-25 [Nekko fox]: Blame the cocaine!


  

2011-08-25 [Eyonic]: XD
2011-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: MY COCAINE!


*a cop looks up from his box of doughnuts*
2011-08-25 [Lord Josmar]: 
2011-08-25 [Nekko fox]: No more cocaine, the dick wolves ate it.


*the dick wolves are freaking the fuck out*
2011-08-25 [Jewl]: Hm? Cocaine?
2011-08-25 [Jewl]:   
2011-08-25 [kians mummy]:   
2011-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Total comments over the course of seven friscal years:   



Daily comment averages:
  

2011-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, I know what you're thinking. Yes, the statistics for this friscal year could be a lot better and yes, we still have shrimp. It's in the washing machine out back.


However, we still have five, yes five, days until the end of the friscal year to improve the comment average, yes comment average.
2011-08-25 [Lord Josmar]: But shouldn't we be excited that we did significantly better this year then last year.


*Trips random person with unrelated graph.*
2011-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: NO, WE SHOULDN'T. WE SHOULD BE MORTIFIED.


Ha ha ha ha h- *trips over an unrelated graph*
2011-08-26 [Nekko fox]: Also, Sammie, no one can read your preschool computer project.
2011-08-26 [Lord Josmar]: Thats the joke.
2011-08-26 [Lord Josmar]: It says the frequent masturbation causes your sight to become blurry and text somewhat unreadable....so what have you been doing?
2011-08-26 [Nioniel]: *comment*
2011-08-26 [Stephen]: *comment1*
2011-08-26 [Stephen]: *comment2*
2011-08-26 [Stephen]: There, I did my part again.
2011-08-26 [Nekko fox]: I would find it funny if the horrible, shredded font (in lieu of actually fading font) didn't ruin the joke.


also, if masturbation causes loss of eyesight, sexual intercourse would make me blind. Any blind people here today?


*A single man raises a shaky hand, his arthritic bones creaking with age*


NO! NO BLINDNESS HERE AT BOB'S DINER! We are an equal opportunity establishment, but you can't help anyone, not even yourself!


*the man helplessly gestures to his dog and cane before the lot of them are dumped unceremoniously into the deep fryer*


2011-08-26 [Aliz]: what people are allowed then? =D yard gnomes?
2011-08-26 [Nekko fox]: Of course yard gnomes, what kind of monsters do you think we are?
2011-08-27 [Top_Hatter]: *trips a blind yard gnome with an unrelated graph*
2011-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *drives in through the wall, dragging two nuns and six school children along the back of his tractor*... *dismounts and ties the tractor up to a nearby post/old man eating dinner*... *takes off his bondage outfit and starts reading the bible behind the counter, while ignoring customers*...


Monsters? No, we're not monsters. They're monsters. *points at a group of hideous monsters covered in hair with big noses in the corner eating orphans and draining the surrounding tables of their happiness energy*... *they notice me staring and start shouting in Hebrew*...
2011-08-27 [Lord Josmar]: Hey! No jews allowed here unless you fulfill the stereotypical expectations of your looks, personality, and speech pattern!


*A man in an SS uniform with a swastika cut into his forehead, eating a pork sandwich and some shellfish, counting out the last of his money in pennies to pay for the food, and refusing to get circumsized, looked up from his non-kosher meal.*


"Da fuck you talkin' bout?"


*Gets beat by years of suffering amd oppression in crowbar form*
2011-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *some bar crows look up from the crow bar*


HEY! PAY YOUR TABS, DAMMIT!!


*they fly away, presumably to Misty's house to peck at her face, which wouldn't be the first time today she's had a big black pecker poking her eye*
2011-08-27 [Delladreing]: http://youtu.be/muVfidujxRg this was fairly interesting and pointless. So I thought of you guys.
2011-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I fail to see how that's pointless. It contains necessary information that could very well save your life someday.
2011-08-27 [Nekko fox]: It DOES contain necessary information that saved my life! If not for his monotone presentation, I would have been devoured by the Hordes of Um-Shakal long ago.


*The Hordes of Um-Shakal look up from their goblets filled with blood from which they drink to praise the glorious name of Um-Shakal*


"Excuse us, can we get more breadsticks?"


Oh, certainly.


*Walks to the kitchen and brings them a packaged loaf of wheat bread from 1978 which now has a mouse living inside*
2011-08-27 [Jewl]: *grabs the mouse and eats it*
2011-08-27 [Jewl]: MEW!
2011-08-27 [Nekko fox]: MY MOUSE.
2011-08-27 [Nekko fox]: *Weeps over the loss of the new digital mouse that he bought Mort as a present to use with his computer here at work*
2011-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: It... it's fine... I didn't need a new mouse anyway... *continues using the jagged, obsolete, and radiation emitting Computer Cube that came with his Stained Glass Windows 95*... *his hand, now warped and damaged beyond the repair of modern technology, twitches and is unable to give correct change to a customer*... *cries himself to sleep on top of table eight, ruining a family's otherwise delightful meal*
2011-08-29 [Stephen]: *records Mort's suffering and posts it on Youtube to create another viral video* =D


1,000,000 + views, here I come!
2011-08-29 [Nekko fox]: No no, those million views are for good videos.


*The video only receives ten views, all negative, everyone upset that you are taking advantage of Mort the Samaritan*
2011-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *Youtube completely shuts down and goes out of business because of the awful video*... *the president gives Mort a medal of honor to make up for what he's been through*... *Mort makes millions by appearing on talk shows and writing books about his loss*... *all this is great, but it still doesn't make up for the loss of the mouse and the humiliation of knowing that ten people saw his sorrow*...
2011-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Sigh... *sips fine wine from a golden goblet atop his 20-story mansion*... I'm going for a ride in my diamond coated jet to cheer myself up... *heads down to his airport*...
2011-08-29 [Top_Hatter]: MY JET!


*snatches jet out of mid flight, leaving Mort an object in motion until acted upon by an opposing force*
2011-08-29 [Nioniel]: MY OPPOSING FORCE!


*snatches opposing force out of mid-motion until jetting upon flight*
2011-08-29 [Lord Josmar]: MY FLIGHT!
*snatches flight out of mid-opposing until motion upon jetting*
2011-08-29 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SNATCHES!


*a group of school children start giggling*


Oh, ha h- *gets acted upon by an opposing force*
2011-08-29 [Nekko fox]: MY REACTION!


*It is equal and opposite of Mort*
2011-08-29 [Top_Hatter]: *Sir Isaac Newton looks up from his apples and decides to toss one at Tesla*...*Tesla reacts quicker with his futuristic Coil gun*...*the apple explodes in mid-flight; Mort is caught in the crossfire...also, several chipmunks in the nearby trees explode, though completely unrelated*
2011-08-29 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Hey. What did I miss?
2011-08-29 [Lord Josmar]: Nothin'. Just another boring day at Bob's Diner.


*A group of robotic orphans break free of their restraints and burst forth from the closet. Quickly seizing several customers and setting themselves to rending their flesh from their bones.*


See...boring day.
2011-08-29 [Duke Devlin]: <3
2011-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *a moth flutters in through the window*... *jots this down in his journal of interesting things*...
2011-08-30 [Stephen]: o3o
Moth. Prettty. *stares*   
2011-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *the moth lands on [Pillowthief]*


*some hillbillies take notice*


"He got a real pretty moth, ain't he?"


"That's the truth."


*they begin to brutally sodomize him, while he squeals like a pig*
2011-08-30 [Lord Josmar]: *The moth flies away from [Pillowthief], just to get a better angle for it's camcorder*
2011-08-30 [Nekko fox]: MY MOTH!
2011-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *kills moth*!


We have a day left, people!


*brings the moth back to life using extremely technologically advanced, one of a kind machinery that will bring anything back to life, but only once before it self-destructs and kills everything in a 50-mile radius, which it proceeds to now do*
2011-08-30 [Lord Josmar]: *Standing on the 50-mile marker watching the explosion expand. A sudden sneeze results in me stumble backwards, putting me on the 50.00000001-mile marker.*


Damn dust.
2011-08-30 [Nioniel]: MY DUST!
2011-08-30 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Yup. Another boring day at Bobs
2011-08-30 [Flisky]: It's never boring at Bob's. *spoken from a crater of what used to be the neighborhood. Ironically, the only building still standing is the two and a half walls making up Bob's*
2011-08-30 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Building design like that must have saved a lot on windows and lights
2011-08-30 [Flisky]: Design? Design?! Where?
2011-08-30 [Nekko fox]: KILL THE DESIGN!


*stabs Granny McMillan with a Granny Smith Apple*


That's from Granny Smith you bitch!


*She dies confused and full of regret*
2011-08-30 [Stephen]: *chases the once dead and now revived moth around* Moth!   
2011-08-30 [Nekko fox]: *Shoots the dead/undead/redead/revived/revised/resigned/designed/cosigned/cosign/sin/tangent/ algebra/geometry moth in it's obtuse face*


WHORE!
2011-08-30 [Top_Hatter]: Awww, how acute!
2011-08-30 [Nekko fox]: That's what he gets for not being straight.
2011-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ...


...Isosceles!
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: ah yes. Isosceles the ancient Greek warrior. Let's not forget his famous comrades, not all of them warriors: Heracles, Sophocles, Pericles, Testicles, Aristophanes, Achilles. They teamed up, headed east and took on the dread killer Scalenes.
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: ...


Penis mongering whore.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: QWOP - is awesome!
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Only Carl Lewis is creepier than that virtual runner.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: I love when he lands on his head, though. The runner, not Carl Lewis.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: (Carl sings! o____O) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jamJ4-C_TME
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: Therefore he clearly would not land on his head.
2011-08-31 [Jewl]: So... you guys must get your material from... what? 4chan? Funnyjunk? The others that aren't important?
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Scrapyard, mostly. They don't mind, you can pretty much take anything you want. *points at the gate out back with a sign on it that says, "No trespassing!"*
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: There are just under seven hours until the end of the friscal year. Is it too much to ask that we get over 4.6 billion new comments in the next few hours?
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: *Pats Mort on the shoulder, "accidentally" dislocating his shoulder and breaking his collar bone*


No Mort, it's not too much to ask, but American's and British alike have become lazy, squalid, tasteless creatures who prefer to spend most of their time drooling and staring at bibles and whatnot.
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: On that note, would someone throw another religious text on the fire?


*A street urchin pushes the Quran, the Kings James Bible, the Kojiki, the Eddas, and the Sanwu Liji and looks up inquisitively about which to throw*


Don't look at me! I said throw some on, not which.


*The urchin looks confused before it is unceremoniously shoveled into the mouth of an obese American woman who is sweating from the effort of consuming food and breathing heavily through her mouth like a wounded buffalo*


Fine, I'll do it myself. Geez, such lazy people here.
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: *Rolls the fat American woman into the bonfire. When her flesh cracks and the fat bubbles out, the fire grows gigantic and terrible and awesome to behold*


*Nekko gets some marshmallows*


*Throws them on the bonfire for the fat woman to eat while she's burning*
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: The "friscal year" is . . . frisky? Do realize, of course, people won't comment if they have to finish the friscal year up in style. They have to be frisky, so they will be frisky. it is written. The friscal year must have closure.
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: PAUL, YOU LIE!


*Throws more marshmallows at the rotund whale of a being roasting in the fire*


Hm, reminds me of Misty.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Go ahead and whine while I get frisky offline, Nekko. There are friscal year deadlines to meet! Later, y'all:3
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: I'm not wine, I'm a very aromatic Mistrà liqueur, thank ye very much.


*Is promptly drunk by one of the children, who coughs and splutters before passing out*
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: *watches the drunken antics of the children and shakes head*
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: There I made my contribution.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: Twice.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: Thrice.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: Four times.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: Crap!
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Quiet now, no swearing in front of the fucking children.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I mean seriously! My gosh, you're just... a meanie face! Excuse my fucking language.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: 44 more minutes, people!
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: *Batman comes to save the day for the Friscal year*
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Oh Batman, what ever would we do without you?
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: *Batman sits down and starts eating some of the chicken tenders one of the recently deceased patrons left behind*
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: Damn it, I could've sworn I put those back in the soup.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: ...Oh...poor friscal year...
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: SIX MINUTES!
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: FIVE MINUTES REMAIN!


  

2011-08-31 [Flisky]: Ahh! Creepy moon thing!
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: I'm crackling with post-friscal friskiness. And now, onto saving the fiscal year?
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Now it's probably less than five minutes.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: More like three.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody cares about the fiscal year. That's just stupid.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: But I'm rounding down.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Random cheesy-ass comment to save the day.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: And you're a bad person for doing so.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Okay, now it's at three minutes.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: My hero? :/        
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: You bunch of weirdos.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Now it's at 2:30.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Approximately.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Much less now, I'm sure.
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: If you keep counting down...you'll soon run out of time.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Is that a threat?
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: End of friscal year...
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Less than thirty seconds!
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Last of the friscal year!
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope, missed it. We only got to 34731.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I blame you, [Flisky]. *spits on your kneecaps*
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: *runs crying into the bathroom/kitchen*
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Don't get all emo on us, Mort . . .
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *cuts wrists*... *not my wrists, but some screaming gentleman's*...
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: So, that's only an average of 14.20821917808219 comments a day for the 10/11 friscal year.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: *fetches some unholy Bob's diner pantry concoction to stanch the bleeding* *also gets some over-the-counter knee cleaser, along with baking soda to remove the dreaded post-cleaning shine. If it works toning down shining bald heads, surely it must help against too-shiny knees?*
2011-08-31 [Flisky]: That's twice of last year's, isn't it?
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: And what happened to Nekko, all of a sudden . . . ?
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Perhaps [Nekko fox] was eliminated from this year's Friscal Year budget?
2011-08-31 [Jewl]: Baking soda tones down bald-shine? Cool!
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: NO. But it's also roughly half of the first friscal year. So you think about that.
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Actually, we typically wait until the end of the 31st before calculating friscal data, so the 10/11 year isn't over quite yet.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Desperate times call for desperate measures. To quote Thoreau: "Simplify simplify- Money is not required to buy one necessity of the soul"
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]:   


Good ol' Mr. Neckbeard himself . . .
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: If we get 100 more comments by the end of the day, we can go up by .4 on the average!
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]:   



. . . Good ol' Mr. Neckbeard brought to you courtesy of Ask Pauly the Anthro-Dragon!
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Better.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: More comment fodder: In my vacation I haven't shaved once. Should I shave everything but my neck, and resemble Thoreau when I return to work?


(Keep those random comments coming, folks . . . )
2011-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Strange... 20 comments ago, we had 34731 comments, but now we've only got 34735...
2011-08-31 [Sheamus Finn]: Interesting, 16 comments didn't count? Where they canadian?
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Hmm, I wonder if it's the fault of "those keeping tabs! . . . AND OTHERS" and all of those wonderful purported people with imaginary friends? Hell yes, blame it on them all. :PPP
2011-08-31 [Sheamus Finn]: 1, 2, E, brown, monkey, cloud.....(damn you public school systyem!)
2011-08-31 [Nioniel]: The poor comments must have ran for their lives to escape this place. *shakes head*


They'll never survive out there in the real world.
2011-08-31 [Nekko fox]: There is a real world? When did this happen?
2011-08-31 [Nioniel]: I think in the 60's...ish.
2011-08-31 [Paul Doyle]: Ah, yes . . . the real world! Can't you vote people off your island and off your beach in the real world, with cameras running 24/7/365? And let's not forget about corporate sponsorship. There's an absence of fat/old/disabled people. Why, they don't exist in the real world! And neither do starving Africans. Oh, and in the real world Sarah Palin has a major shot at the US 2012 presidential election, too. "Sarah Palin With a Brain" (also known as Michelle Bachman)is an imposter, a fembot really, trying to mess with the real world. And let's not get started on the status of Oprah Winfrey.
2011-08-31 [Nioniel]: I thought Oprah ate herself in '99...?
2011-08-31 [Sheamus Finn]: Palin 2012? I volunteer to be voted off this planet....
*starts building a spaceship*
2011-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Stupid Elftown! It's still saying there's only 34736 comments!


(first comment of the new friscal year for future reference)
2011-09-01 [Nioniel]: Birds Voting



*kicks Elftown*
2011-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: There we go. The comments finally caught up. We only had 5,259 comments this year for an average of 14.40821917808219 comments per day.
2011-09-01 [Nekko fox]: YOUR MOTHER!
2011-09-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's mother looks up from stitching a sweater and waves*
2011-09-01 [Nekko fox]: SHUT UP!


*Granny Smith stabs Mort's mother with her custom-designed ninja-throwing-apples. they are not effective until they lodge in her throat*
2011-09-01 [Aliz]: *uses ninja-throwing-apples to make apple pie* :D
2011-09-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-01 [Kitailec]: Ew.
2011-09-01 [Paul Doyle]: Ah, so "Walden" wasn't a pond or a town. it was Thoreau's secret boyfriend. Well, that solves it then!
2011-09-02 [Stephen]: Creepy.


Anyway, just noticed the Zelda noise button. Spent a good 5 or 10 minutes pressing it over and over. /happy :3
2011-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: We had to have something to replace Nyan Cat, after he was so heinously slain.
2011-09-02 [Nekko fox]: Heinous is such a harsh word. Like anus. But with deceitful "h's" placed in the lead.
2011-09-02 [Top_Hatter]: *notices the camera crew and media surrounding the photo and overhears some of the conversation* ...Representative Anthony D. Weiner, emphatically denied that he had sent a suggestive photograph, but also said he could not be sure that he is not the person in the image. “This was essentially a hacked account that had a gag photo sent out on it,” Mr. Weiner, a Democrat, said during an interview in his office here. “I can’t say with certainty very much about where the photograph came from.” ...*finally, some light had been shed on the eclipsing shadow of Mr. Weiner*
2011-09-02 [Sheamus Finn]: I blame Sarah Palin and PhotoShop.....
2011-09-02 [Nekko fox]: CURSE YOU PHOTOSHOP!
2011-09-02 [Eyonic]: not the shop of photo!
2011-09-03 [Avaz]: Wait, where is there a Zelda noise button? *must find!*
2011-09-03 [Stephen]: Once again, I find myself pushing the button. It's even more fun to push it really fast. Oh, how I wish you could put iframes in your house.
2011-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Photoshop, Illustrator, and Corel look up from their platters of cash and starving artists' broken dreams*


"The HELL you just say?"


*as a show of power, Photoshop pulls out a crop tool, bashing GIMP with it and making him a gimp, while Illustrator and Corel illustrate their strength by using their lasso tools to coral and inflict pain on Paint and ensure no escape for Inkscape*
2011-09-04 [Stephen]: Do-do-do-dooo. :D
2011-09-04 [Sheamus Finn]: Where? Don't step in it.
2011-09-04 [Stephen]: Bye bye, butterfly.


  
I love you, you love me, we're best friends like friends should be   




  

2011-09-04 [Nioniel]: My Doodie! :O
2011-09-04 [Nekko fox]: Poodle poo...dle...poo....dle...poo...dle poo...dle poodle...poo...dle...poo
2011-09-05 [Stephen]: So.. now I find myself coming here often to listen to the Barney song, as I push the Zelda-button over and over..
2011-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck?! How long has Barney been there?!
2011-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, we're off to a pretty terrible friscal year so far.
2011-09-05 [Nekko fox]: Oh hush Mort, you wouldn't know because you were too busy masturbating into the egg salad.


*several customers spit up their egg salad*


Or was it the tuna salad?


*several customers spit up their tuna salad*


Or was it just into the salad?


*Several cows spit up their salad, chew it a few times, then swallow it once again before repeating the process*
2011-09-05 [Stephen]: Also, we're off to a pretty terrible friscal year so far.


Yes, you are! I can still see my comments from two days ago. At this rate BD's is going to have to close down. -pushes Zelda button more-
2011-09-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Hey guys! *sees various salad messes* Mort still can't find a date huh?
2011-09-05 [Nekko fox]: I think he did. A lovely day in March, if I remember correctly.
2011-09-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: As long as it didn't end up being a night in Paris
2011-09-05 [Nekko fox]: Oh, that's just an event, Mort wouldn't touch them.
2011-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *March looks up from her cup of tea* "Wait... a day in what now?"


Nothing, dear. Nothing. Drink your tea.
2011-09-05 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from 'refilling' the tea pots from the urinal in the men's room*


We make tea now?
2011-09-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Yeah, but we only serve it piss warm
2011-09-05 [Nekko fox]: Oh Good.


*Takes the 'tea' out of the 'refrigerator' out 'back'*
2011-09-05 [Nekko fox]: *Is actually just peeing into a bottle and throwing it onto a hobo*
2011-09-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Tell that smelly bum to find a shower
2011-09-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *the bum, thinking he'll cleverly get back at us by "ruining" our "soup", climbs into the giant pot to wash off, just as planned*
2011-09-05 [Stephen]: Yum, more soup!   
2011-09-06 [Top_Hatter]: *bashes the bum with a giant ladle and puts the giant lid back on* ...Soups up!!
2011-09-06 [Paul Doyle]: *contracts Rambo to blow up Barney with a flamethrower plus some rocket-propelled grenades*
2011-09-06 [Stephen]: Nooo! My purple singing dinosaur! How could you!? -falls to his knees weeping in an over-exaggerated way-
2011-09-06 [Top_Hatter]: ...and somehow, I doubt that is [Stephen]'s first time on his knees in front of a singing lizard...


...but hey, who am I to judge the dogma of Puff the Magic Dragon?
2011-09-06 [Paul Doyle]: Puff the Magic Dragon was voiced by the late great Burgess Meredith, better known as the Penguin in the old gay Batman TV series from the 1960s . . . and trainer Mickey Goldmill in the first couple "Rocky" movies, so Puff wins the dogma debate, because Puff is cool, Puff is groovy, and Puff is also Rocky's trainer.


Similarly, consider Sean Connery. As if the original Agent 007 wasn't cool enough to begin with (forgetting shit like "Zardoz") he was the voice of Draco in "Dragonheart". 'Nuff said!
2011-09-07 [Stephen]: D= Ihu. :3


I barely remember Dragonheart.. if I even remember it at all. o_O I might be thinking of the wrong movie. x)
2011-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: We're currently at an average of 6.9 comments a day for this friscal year. I'm going to rape all of you. In the face.
2011-09-07 [Paul Doyle]: *hugs and more hugs, just for the purpose of adding comments, and the anticipated reaction*
2011-09-07 [Nioniel]: *reactions and more reactions, just for the hugs of adding purpose, and the reaction anticipated*
2011-09-07 [Paul Doyle]: *strikes a sexy anthodragon pose*
2011-09-07 [Nioniel]: Well done.
2011-09-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *strikes a sexy anthrodragon*


*a restraining order is issued*
2011-09-07 [Nekko fox]: Who else saw that one coming?
2011-09-07 [Paul Doyle]: Heh heh, that's what she said :PPPP
2011-09-07 [Stephen]: Zelda button!!! *pushes it more*
2011-09-07 [Paul Doyle]: *obeying the order, restrains Mort in BDSM gear and leaves him for Barney to handle*
2011-09-08 [Stephen]: @_@


*pretends to not notice anything and pushes the Zelda button to drown out Mort's pleas of help*
2011-09-08 [Top_Hatter]: *pretends to notice everything...and starts creeping people out* ...zzizzer...zzizzer...zzizzer *starts pushing Mort's buttons to drown out the Zelda* WHOOO PAH!! *handcuffs Barney to the sexy Anthrodragon* ...so...uh, what else did she say?
2011-09-08 [Lazy lion]: Why don't they serve bacon?!??! I demand total satisfaction!!
2011-09-08 [Paul Doyle]: That is what she said, after all *nods sagely*
2011-09-08 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Were you there listening? Oo
2011-09-08 [Nekko fox]: Of course they serve bacon, because that IS what she said, right after she started screaming "You'll hear from my lawyer".
2011-09-08 [Top_Hatter]: *stomps over to her and asks her :* ...what exactly DID you say, so we can all get it on record since you want to involve the legal system here? * she attempts to reply but is having trouble swallowing the lawyer*
2011-09-08 [Top_Hatter]: *Bacon looks up from his plate of "Loose Feet" when the lawyer starts screaming, in what sounds like to him, a mating call*
2011-09-09 [Stephen]: I want a button that makes the annoying fairy (that I can't remember the name of from OCoT) "Listen!" voice..
2011-09-09 [Stephen]: Navi, I think..
2011-09-09 [Mortified Penguin]: What do you mean? We already have that button. It's been there for years.
2011-09-09 [Paul Doyle]: A Na'vi button might be nice to press, like that fine Neytiri's belly button for example.
2011-09-09 [Stephen]: !!!!
Now I'm never going to want to leave this page. D:
2011-09-10 [Top_Hatter]: You want to know what happened to Navi? She's a whore now...take a look:


http://www.effinfunny.com/legend-of-neil/seasons?vid=4814&sid=3
2011-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY. That button doesn't fit with the button theme. And we've already got an orange one anyway.
2011-09-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: buttons.
2011-09-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Ayyyyyyyyyye I pressed something and an Oompah Loopah came out!
2011-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: What the heck are you talking about? *looks up from buttoning his shirt with a rainbow of buttons*
2011-09-10 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: I'm confused. *Sings the oompah Loompah song*
2011-09-10 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND ABOUT RAINBOW BUTTONS?! THE WHITE LIGHT FROM THE HOLE IN THE ROOF IS STRIKING MY CRYSTAL BUTTONS AT AN ANGLE OF ABOUT 41 DEGREES, RESULTING IN DISPERSION, IN WHICH THE RED LIGHT REFRACTS LESS THAN THE BLUE LIGHT, CREATING A GLORIOUS RAINBOW THAT BLINDS PEOPLE DRIVING BY IN THE STREET. *points out the window at the flaming wreckage caused by the rainbow buttons*


Now, if you'll excuse me... *gets his corpse gathering sack and goes foraging*
2011-09-10 [Stephen]: Purdddy.


I swear, this is like my Elftown-homepage now.
2011-09-10 [Stephen]: Echoing Oompa Loopah's! :D *mashes button over and over as Barney sings*
2011-09-10 [Stephen]: 



It's kinda loud.. :3
2011-09-11 [Stephen]: Kekeke. <3 Auto-playing music.
2011-09-11 [Ninja Smurf]: Wow, not quite the music I would pick for the ambiance here at Bobs.
2011-09-11 [Flisky]: Yeah, B's D's keeps making my Shockwave crash.
2011-09-11 [Lord Josmar]: Well after the Autobots whooped his ass I would expect him to crash a lot.
2011-09-11 [Flisky]: ...Yeah...not what I meant.
2011-09-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure it is.
2011-09-11 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Nuh-uh! XP
2011-09-12 [Top_Hatter]: My Shockwave!


*transforms into MegAdobe and Flashes all the Players while he hijacks Shockwave and runs to Java*
2011-09-12 [Stephen]: One of my pages on Elfpack keeps making my phone crash, and a friend of mine's phone.


Iframe tags are fun. x3
2011-09-12 [Stephen]: Mort! You broke the music. D:
2011-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: I'll break your FACE.
2011-09-12 [Flisky]: Hey, it works again! XD
2011-09-12 [Stephen]: >.> <.<


Stoopid !uQt!!
Ihu, tag.
2011-09-12 [Flisky]: Argh! Crash!
2011-09-12 [Lord Josmar]: I have the perfect video for this wiki! I just can't put it up, lol.
2011-09-12 [Stephen]: o3o
Why can't you?


Music music music! <3
2011-09-12 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Dance monkey dance!
2011-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *a group of chimps look up from their bananas and proceed to viciously rip [Dainty Delusive Doll]'s entire face off*
2011-09-12 [Aliz]: *video tapes it*
2011-09-12 [Nekko fox]: I'm gone for a few days and this is what's going on now?...


Hm, not much of a change...


*Works the hi-def audio so they can add the vicious face-rip scene into the next slasher movie coming out for Halloween*
2011-09-12 [Ninja Smurf]: *Steals [Dainty Delusive Doll]'s face and surgically applies it to a chimp that looks amazingly like [Nekko fox]*
2011-09-12 [Lord Josmar]: I don't believe I have the privs. Or do I not need privs...
2011-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: You just gotta BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! Or, alternatively, ask for priv 90 at privs.
2011-09-12 [Lord Josmar]: Meh! I refuse to ask for ANYTHING!
2011-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Or, you could just change it and I could get rid of the automatic uQt!
2011-09-13 [Lord Josmar]: Hrm...
2011-09-13 [Lord Josmar]: I just broke everything...
2011-09-13 [Stephen]: How dare you! Fixored. :3
2011-09-13 [Lord Josmar]: [Stephen] the fixor! Can he fixor it? YES HE CANZ!
2011-09-13 [Stephen]: *looks up from the unconscious and possibly dead body he was whacking with a hammer* Uh... yeah! Fixing.. something like that. *pushes body into soup pot and walks off whistling*
2011-09-13 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *puts giraffe gun back on the wall*


I told that sumbitch not to touch my damn sammich.
2011-09-13 [Nekko fox]: He deserved what he got.


*scoops up some chunks and makes shakes*
2011-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I warned him, but he just didn't list- oh, wait. Here's my sandwich! *picks sandwich up off a large, noticeable tray labeled "Mort's sandwich tray"*


*takes a bite of the sandwich and then throws it to the lions* Ew, bologna...
2011-09-13 [Nekko fox]: *the lions, now severely confused and terribly distressed, dive into traffic to end their suffering*
2011-09-13 [Nekko fox]: *the one who doesn't chokes on bologna*
2011-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *the judges on the side of the road hold up signs with "10" on them, except the last judge, who was hit by a truck and is dead*
2011-09-13 [Nekko fox]: *the zombies in the basement hold up signs that say "10" for the deaths of the judge and the lions as they are brought back into the world as lifeless, soulless flesh-eating monsters. Except for a couple that are feasting on a customer*
2011-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *a customer starts to hold up a sign, but is promptly shot 643 times in the face with a shotgun (taking several hours out of Mort's busy schedule)*... *points at a sign on the wall that says, "No holding up signs!"*...


Hmm, that sign's a little crooked... TIM! FIX THAT SIGN! *Tiny Tim picks the sign up to straighten it and is promptly shot 643 times in the face*...
2011-09-13 [Top_Hatter]: PONPONPON sounds a lot like PERFUME, or perhaps all J-pop is starting to sound the same 0_o
2011-09-13 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: oo I like those giraffes *Tears a big chunk of hind leg off and starts to munch*
2011-09-14 [Ninja Smurf]: STOP EATING THE TABLE LEG!!! *throws the table into the food processer*
2011-09-14 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Hey, at least it's not the carpet
2011-09-14 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Mm..got wood?
2011-09-14 [Nekko fox]: Wait, who's munching rugs?
2011-09-14 [Avaz]: O_o;
2011-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his platter of rugs*


What? They have a lot of fiber.
2011-09-14 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you know better. You're doctor put you on a no-wool diet. Only rare Arcadian Marmot fur for you mister.
2011-09-15 [Sheamus Finn]: Isn't that the American Possum?
2011-09-15 [Nekko fox]: Quiet Shameful Fun!


*Backhands the possum*
2011-09-20 [Ninja Smurf]: Don't make me call PETA on you!
2011-09-20 [Avaz]: PETA makes great tasty bread. Goes well with hummus. Hmm, I wonder if that's on the menu yet? >_>
2011-09-20 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Sure. Todays special
2011-09-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: who's Peter? Peter Pan?


*Side note, did you know that those crappy Uggs are made from real fur? I was informed of this-another product to add to my hate list. Please don't tell me any of you lot wear them!
2011-09-20 [Nekko fox]: HOLY PISSFUCK! It's been days since Bob's Diner has been used by anything but cyber-rats and the ghost of film-noir legend Allen Juliard-Cunnings!


*Rats wearing Tron outfits look up from their bits-per-second meals, while Allen Juliard-Cunnings ignores everyone because he's a fucking film-noir legend, what does he care?*
2011-09-20 [Nekko fox]: Also, real fur is where it's at.
2011-09-20 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: k.
2011-09-20 [Nekko fox]: *Points across the street at Real Fur, the new club that just opened up when Elftown was down*


See, look at all those furries getting together and partying over there. That place is boppin'.
2011-09-20 [Avaz]: *makes mention that if Real Fur doesn't cut it, they can try Real Dolls*
2011-09-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course Real Fur doesn't cut it. The Scissors is totally where it's at.


Yes. Yes, officer, The Scissors. That's where the disturbance is at. Yes. Uh huh. Thank you. I love you too. *hangs up the phone*


Damn kids and their loud music... *goes back to knitting a sweater*
2011-09-21 [Lord Josmar]: I hate Knitting a Sweater! Stupid theme clubs.
2011-09-21 [Sheamus Finn]: *members of the murder weapon of the month and poison of the week clubs look up from their meals and frown*
2011-09-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Happy Shot o'clock! Cheers!
2011-09-23 [Nekko fox]: BATMAN BEAT UP THE NEGROES!
2011-09-23 [Nekko fox]: Wait, what happened while I was gone?
2011-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *points at the pile of Negroes stacked in the corner beside Batman, who is casually sipping a cup of coffee*


I thought you knew?
2011-09-23 [Thunder Cid]: We lost numbers that's what!
2011-09-23 [Nekko fox]: No one cares about the numbers!


*several accountants look up from their ledgers, their eyes red from tears and squinting because of the harsh electric lights turned towards them to make it seem more dramatic*


"Can we leave now?...You said if we balanced you accounts, we could leave, but it's impossible! There's no income...like, at all! We don't even know how you get the food you cook, or how you have electricity or running water still, you never pay taxes!"


*Smacks an accountant with his own ledger. He starts sobbing in a most unmanly way*


Quiet!...Wait, when did we get running water here?


*several terrified customers shrug and shake their heads*
2011-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Running water? That's just ridiculous. Nothing runs here.


*violently breaks a passing customer's leg to prove his point*


See? Nothi-


*a nearby tractor runs like a deer*


Huh. I guess I was wrong. *violently tapes the customer's leg back together*
2011-09-23 [foxyvixen17]: i'm leaveing now while my tail is still intact and nekko theres cookies for you in the shiney silver box in the north corner *turns to leave while still alive*
2011-09-23 [Nekko fox]: Holy crap! SILVER!


*Dozens of silver miners go scrabbling over one another to claim the treasure*


*Dozens of silver minors stand perfectly still, what with being silver and all, and are subsequently scooped up by the miners and coveted*
2011-09-23 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *Elvis' wig blows in through an open window in the Diner. It makes an impromptu landing on Mort's Pumpkin Pie. Looking remarkably like a black, hairy little island surrounded by custard. Disgusted, Mort stabs it with a fork. It catches onto a gentle breeze and sails politely throughout the diner.*
2011-09-23 [foxyvixen17]: *snickers alot playing with my sterling sivler ring and necklace watching the events unfold*
2011-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: MY EVENTS!


*carefully folds his events and stacks them back in the cupboard*
2011-09-23 [Avaz]: DON'T PUT THEM IN THE CUPBOA--


*doesn't manage to complete the sentence before the Indian in the Cupboard steals the events and uses them to make a teepee and for tinder*
2011-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: MY EVE-


Screw this.


*goes back to eating his hairy pie*


*[foxyvixen17]'s mom looks up from her 14th glass of bourbon*


Not you, woman. This other hairy pie.


*she sighs, noticeably depressed, and goes back to drinking away her sorrows/food stamps/child support money*... *her wig falls off, revealing her scarred, grotesque scalp and all the dead bugs that have fused with her skin*... *the foul stench emanating from her various crevices and folds doesn't so much mark the territory surrounding her, the place she has now come to know as "home", as it pollutes it*... *she notices the clock on the wall and realizes she is late for work*... *she promptly staggers over to table seven, climbs on top of the table, and starts doing crotch thrusts into a British gentleman's face, spilling his tea all over his fancy new bow tie*


"I say!"


*customers proceed to angrily hurl loose change at [foxyvixen17]'s mom, who grunts stupidly and mistakes it for compensation and continues thrusting her massive, cottage cheese thighs as the table creaks and groans under the weight of the bloated behemoth*
2011-09-23 [Avaz]: Onlookers: "His crumpets are all in a tizzy now, aren't they?" "Hmmyes.."
2011-09-23 [foxyvixen17]: what the hell? jesus mary joeseph christoppher christ what i do to you?
2011-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID! DO I HAVE TO POINT IT OUT FOR YOU? *points at a chair*


The nerve! As if you don't know what I'm talking about!
2011-09-23 [Araglas]: *pokes head in*
2011-09-23 [Nekko fox]: *Pokes [Araglas]'s head in*
2011-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We're currently at an average of 5.78 comments a day, people. I DON'T CARE IF ELFTOWN WAS DOWN FOR SEVERAL DAYS, IT'S STILL YOUR FAULT. *pokes [Araglas]'s corpse in(to a hole out back)*
2011-09-24 [foxyvixen17]: *luaghs lightly* its not mine but i think it was the strange homeless dude in the kitchen
*said homeless dude leaves the kitchen looking around then stills all the silverware in the building muttering about crazy penguins in pink bunny suits of doom*
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: In the original Pokémon Red/Blue, when you encounter your rival in Lavender Town he asks whether or not you know what it’s like to have one of your Pokémon die. At this point in the game, he no longer has his Raticate that he used in previous battles. Your rival battle before this took place aboard the S.S. Anne. Your rival’s Raticate sustained serious injuries from the battle… but, because crowding and confusion on the luxury liner, he was unable to make it to a Pokémon Center in time and the Raticate passed away. The real reason your rival is in Lavender Town to begin with is to lay his deceased friend to rest.


Despite all of this, your rival never outwardly tells you that you’re responsible for the death of his Pokémon. He hides his grief and instead channels that energy into the motivation he needed to continue his quest to become Indigo League Champion. The death of his Raticate effectively destroys your rival’s impish, childhood innocence. Although he tells himself that he doesn’t hold you responsible, he subconsciously holds a great deal of resentment towards you which further fuels his ambitions. Tearfully swearing upon his Raticate’s grave to not fail in what he set out to do, he trains hard in hopes of becoming better than you… defeating you… and to eventually make it to the Pokémon League.


Mere moments after he became Indigo League champion, he was defeated… by you. Although he fulfilled his promise to his fallen Pokémon, it was only for a painfully brief instant. In the end, your rival is scolded by his grandfather while you receive the professor’s praise. During the course of the game, you steal your rival’s innocence, crush his dreams, and ultimately snatch away the love of his own grandfather. Oh, and by the way, your rival doesn’t have any parents. He’s an orphan.
2011-09-24 [foxyvixen17]: O.o *hides behind a random wall of cookies to escape the pokemon story*
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: FEEL THE GUILT!
2011-09-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *guilt looks up from his dinner of childhood dreams expecting a nice hard frisking*
2011-09-24 [foxyvixen17]: but i dont like pokemon and guilt go back to eating cuz i aint touching ya *shudders almost gaging cuz i dont have anything to feel guilty about*
2011-09-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *Guilt sighs but returns to eating, taking a moment to sprinkle his dinner with some innocence*
2011-09-24 [foxyvixen17]: *tosses a 5 dollar bill to guilt and stops a rondom follower of morts evil terror abd dictatoris reign and promptly beats the poor fellow to death*
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: Why are you hitting your grandmother like that? It is quite disrespectful.
2011-09-24 [foxyvixen17]: she stole my kitty kat and ate him my poor black kitty kat *continues the beating*
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: Oh, well carry on then. *He hasn't stopped beating his own customer as if he owes him child support*


WHY WON'T YOU LOOK AT ME WHEN WE MAKE LOVE?!


*The lamp, upon which this abuse was being delivered, remains silent. Eventually, it breaks, and the police are called and take the lamp into custody*
2011-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: What are you talking about? I do look at you. I even record you most of the time. *points at a website on his computer titled HotLampAction.com*
2011-09-24 [Sheamus Finn]: 30,000,000 hits on google can't be wrong....
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: GOOGLE CAN NEVER BE WRONG. GOOGLE IS GOD.
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: *starts crying* I don't even know what's real anymore.
2011-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Google can tell you what is real.
2011-09-24 [foxyvixen17]: *stares in amazement* woah.....
2011-09-24 [Nekko fox]: *Stands up straight, suddenly quite manly*


Good enough!
2011-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Bing speaks only lies though.


*Chandler looks up from his platter of unemployment*


YOU GET OUT OF HERE. YOU'RE NOT ONE OF MY FRIENDS.
2011-09-26 [Nekko fox]: *Chandler starts sobbing uncontrollably as he's dragged out of the Diner and thrown bodily onto Ray Romano*


No bad acting or shitty comedians.
2011-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Seinfeld temporarily looks up from his plate of honey and, realizing he has nothing to worry about, as he is the greatest actor/comedian of all time, he resumes eating his honey*
2011-09-26 [foxyvixen17]: *wonders if everyone has went insane or is just lacking in sleep*
2011-09-26 [Nekko fox]: What's sleep?


*throws out his seventeenth bottle of caffeine pills*
2011-09-26 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Lol you have to wonder if everyone is insane?
2011-09-26 [Aliz]: we're not insane, we're special D:
2011-09-26 [Nekko fox]: We're not special, we're chickens.


*Indicates Mort and Sagacious scratching at the dirt in the corner, clucking and pecking at bugs, occasionally laying an egg*
2011-09-26 [foxyvixen17]: *giggles* sanity is over rated
2011-09-26 [Nekko fox]: Misty is over-sated.


*Indicates with his thumb a burbling mass of curdles fat and yawing folds full of debris and detritus that once could be considered human, but no longer*
2011-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, don't make fun of table nine. That's not nice.
2011-09-27 [Paul Doyle]: (regarding the current anime:) Japan lost the war because the real Japanese were kidnapped and displaced by strangely attractive alien humanoids with gigantic watery eyes, receding chins and almost no noses. Sadly, from a military defense standpoint these beings couldn't suck enough . . . but then again, neither could the similar "Britannians" who also kidnapped/displaced the real Americans. :P
2011-09-27 OfficialMystin: I am coming back to bob's diner. You can thank Thunder Cid for this happening since he ran me off Fake =P. It's good to be back! :-)
2011-09-27 [Nekko fox]: I love Popcorn.
2011-09-27 [Nekko fox]: 



2011-09-27 [Tekkon KinKreet]: kudos for forced mass suicide
2011-09-27 [Nekko fox]: And the suicide was glrious.
2011-09-27 [Avaz]: Those are several flavors of awesome, Nekko. XD
2011-09-28 [foxyvixen17]: rawrs? *looks confused then decides best not to ask*
2011-09-28 Mystin: Hows it going everyone?
2011-09-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-28 [Nekko fox]: 
2011-09-28 [Tekkon KinKreet]: he won becuase he has bug eyes, just saying
2011-09-28 [Nekko fox]: 
2011-09-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Looks like he got them going an can't get them to stop
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Would you, if you could?
2011-09-29 [Fruit Loops]: its the orgasm face :P
2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Odor Blocker will do that to you.
2011-09-29 [Lord Josmar]: So will visiting Lord Josmar's Emporium of Useless Information.


Notice: Our shipment of horrifically deadly bees didn't arrive, so no Oprah redos. Sorry.
2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Fine then! We didn't want no Oprah rodeos anyway!


*70 clowns sadly pack their bags and climb into a single car*
2011-09-29 [Lord Josmar]: *Suddenly a huge swarm of horrifically deadly bees pop out of the car and begin to sting all the clowns.*


Thats where they went! Now get them all gathered up and over to my wiki!


*The clowns lay on the ground twitching and swelling.*
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 [Tekkon KinKreet]: heavy sad.
2011-09-29 [Paul Doyle]: It looks like the reaction of your average Metallica fan to every new Metallica album since 1991's self-titled "Black Album" (except Death Magnetic, possibly, though by and large that's a self-forgery of their best 1980s stuff).
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: That sucks.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:
  

.......what?!....
2011-09-29 [Serwa]: You're a twat is what.
/b/ is known for its support to and encouraging animal cruelty and child pornography.
You're just one of many wannabes who thinks this is funny/cool.
This is nothing different from the dog they molested with a shovel, the cats they set on fire/ drowned or skinned all for /b/ or any of the other countless acts of cruelty they have done to animals.
But I bet you laughed as much about them all.
Sad tosser.


2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 [Serwa]: Coming from the kid with a naked male fox on his profile..


Goodluck copying other people's pictures to look cool.
Not only it shows lack of personality, it's boring..


2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Did I get my point across?


*A few needles and a pair of scissors cheer*


Quiet all of you.


*the needles and scissors quiet down and become inanimate once more*
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: *Hears a whole lot of childish bawwing but nothing of substance*


Alright then.
2011-09-29 [Serwa]: Goodluck kid.
You're boring.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:
  



Hey, I just look at it this way. You're next big event is when they put you in the ground, old timer. My next big event is college graduation. Ha-chachachacha.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 SirWaka: Sorry, I got logged out for a while. I'm going to go eat some bran flakes and watch Jeopardy while my children refuse to call me because I'm old
2011-09-29 SirWaka: Oh god, I am so alone...I just wanted attention.


PLEASE NOTICE ME!


GIVE ME ATTENTION!
2011-09-29 [Fruit Loops]: Damn your bran flakes! Why does nobody like me :_(
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: I like you Loops.


*Puts you on a pedestal and shoots anybody who gets too close*


MINE! Everyone back off!
2011-09-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Why do you act like such a prick Nekko?
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: *Ponders this*


Because at B's D, it brings out the worst in all of us. And if you'll notice, he's the one who started being a jerk, I simply trolled right back. Mort also plays a part in this, but I think he forgot his script.
2011-09-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: If you love your animals sooo much, why on earth do you post that animal cruelty shit up there? There is always somebody to just take it too far. I actually thought Bob's Diner was funny, but I don't appreciate pictures like that, but you are just a pretty shit person in general really. You are ignorant. And of course, now you will take the piss out of me, because I'm not afraid to tell you that I really don't like the toad cruelty. Its not funny. And beofre I go anything further, I don't want a great big expedition into hate towards me, or SirWaka. I just cannot understand why you would find it funny/post stuff like that up here. I don't mind anything else, but that kind of stuff, f s you make out you are intelligent-so start acting like it.
2011-09-29 [foxyvixen17]: O.O i thinks my funny adddiction just died
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: *shrugs*


I already responded with why you're wrong Infinity via private message. I'm sorry that this guy gave his frog, who was on its last legs, a sending off worth remembering.


Hey, if you want to go on your rant, fine by me, but just take stock of what you are saying. ""I actually thought Bob's Diner was funny" is the most hypocritical thing to say when you are frothing at the mouth about a frog, considering the content of the jokes posted here. Sorry to burst your bubble.


So, congrats on taking something that wasn't serious all too serious, and becoming manic, raging people who just HAD to have their voices heard while pointing fingers and screaming "ignorant" as if it were some kind of catch-all response.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: *takes a sip from his glass and puts on a monocle*


Indeed. Changing your post AFTER I sent you a message about why you were wrong...hm, not all that keen, and if you want people to take your message seriously, you should probably start acting intelligent yourself. Not to mention, if you didn't want an expedition of hate (seriously, trying to shoot down any argument coming your way by brushing it off is pretty childish too), then you shouldn't have responded to begin with. You brought up your petty issues of morality in a wiki notorious for lack thereof. Plus, saying "I don't mind anything else" makes you seem supremely ignorant.


"I don't mind rape, scat, child-abuse, genocide, ostracizing, and myriad other problems, but if you show me a frog, forget it! Ignore my hair-dye, please..."
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: For your information, you sanctimonious little shit, I changed nothing. I added to my first comment BEFORE you sent your ignorant, yes ignorant note. Doing it behind the scenes like the cowardly little vegetable that you are, does n't make me go crying to mommy, it just makes me realize just how much of a pathetic little bitch you really are. The kind that goes crying to mommy after his first rejection with a little boyfriend. And, hey, I don't give a stuff if you paste it wherever to show how brave you are. That is not hair dye, its a wig. I like to dress up. That my business, no one else's business. And also, have you taken a look at my make up bag recently? No, of course you haven't. Because for one thing, its pointless, boring, and NONE OF YOU BUSINESS. If you had, however, you would find products such as Levera. Go look it up. Or don't. I could give a FUCK. Don't you dare make out me to be some hypocrite. You sad little fucks live for this kind of attention-see how far you can wind somebody up . Go get a boy-wife for that. Now fuck off, leave me alone because I CANNOT be arsed with people like you, whiny little homo's-annnnd before you start going on at me that I am homophobic-I'm not..But I am phobic-phobic of you that is. Now, kindly do as you say, and never speak to me again, OR speak about me. 
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Oooh, sounds like I pushed someones buttons.


  





But no, in all seriousness, it's nice to see that you are not only refusing to take time to reflect on your self, but to prove that you are a hypocrite AND a liar, not to mention judgmental. As if wigs are without animal products. It didn't get to be that color on it's own, toots. Animal blood is an essential ingredient in the majority of ink dyes in our world, but I doubt you bothered researching that. And there you go off on your little rants again.


It's nice to see people living up to your expectations and doing exactly what you expect them to do.


  

2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Oh, and fire your grammar instructor. They should be ashamed if you are the product of their effort.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in from the Horse Sodomy room*


Animal cruelty is DISGUSTING, Nekko. *noms on a plate of frog legs* Those frogs have RIGHTS. According to the constitution, article 3, section 8, paragraph 4, "Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Gardening is hard and I can't rhyme."


So, as you can clearly see, table 6 is out of ketchup. *goes back to doing his taxes. Violently. Without a condom. The taxes scream and beg, but nobody comes to help.*
2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: And [Serwa], for your information, you have the same usernumber here as I have on Elfpack. I just thought you should know that. CUNT.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: Mort, would you just strangle the taxes already, they're only four months old. And what are you doing with those frogs?


  



*Takes Mort's frogs away so they can be used to house other, smaller frogs, all of which despair because their close friend Huck the Flying Frog has left them to journey the world while they are left to wallow away life on the ground*
2011-09-29 [Serwa]: ...still boring.


Your life must be pretty empty that you try so hard to get attention on the internet by being a gobby knowitall, and as soon as one bad word is said you fall back on internet meme's such as 'u mad?!'.
Which just shows how ignorant and impossible a little git you are.


You can write twenty pages of stuff that would possibly worse than a frog on a balloon, it doesn't justify it, and it doesnt make it less worse.
And just by pointing at 20 other issues in the world, doesnt make you good at having an adult conversation, it just shows you have nothing to say.
You're just full of bullshit.


This time it's a frog, next time it's a cat.
I don't care if you get off on the animal crualty and child pornography on /b/, not my cup of tea, but if you're into that shit, go ahead. But leave it at /b/.


This is elftown, a fantasy community.
Not a animal cruelty community.


So no matter how many meme's you post,
and no matter of how many time you make fake posts under my name,
And no matter how many pages of bullshit you write, you just fail to make a point everywhere.


And in the end, you just prove us right, you're a little twat,
you go in denial, make yourself look like a fool, and hide your feelings beind insensitive meme's.
Just the number of meme's you use, and the tmie you spend on your trolling contradict all your meme's.


So hey, hope this dose of attention gets you going for the rest of the evening, shame your parents and other people in reallife shun you so that you have to troll on the internet to get attention, I really hope that will change for the better for you. And for us, because it'll mean one less twat on the internetz.


Keep elftown a fantasy community.
And go support your animal cruelty, wether its one frog, a cat or 20.000 frog or whatever testing facilities elsewhere.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: I see a paragraph of nonsense and baseless arguments, and I see you failing to carry much of a point yourself.


So, memes or not, the ketchup isn't being used by table 6.
2011-09-29 [Serwa]: ..boring.
2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner was created for the sole purpose of advocating animal cruelty, [Serwa]. And in doing it so eloquently, Bob's Diner is a literary work of art. Therefore, as Elftown is about art, Bob's Diner (brought to you by the National Association for Raping and Killing the Innocent, or NARKI) is clearly allowed as well as any content posted in Bob's Diner including, but not limited to, illegal material specifically prohibited by Elftown itself.
2011-09-29 [Nekko fox]: And on that note, where do you want to stack all this furry porn, Mort?


2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: The nursery should be fine. Just move the pile of glass and dildos and glass dildos and dildo glass over to table 6, because they're out of ketchup.
2011-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: And also, [Serwa], I think you may have /b/ confused with someplace else. Maybe you're thinking of Ebaumsworld? They're typically the ones that go around raiding and posting gore and stuff like that. /b/ is that nice place that loves cats and ponies. Haven't you ever heard of Caturday?



2011-09-29 Frog: This genocide of my people will not soon be forgotten.


You better watch your back, ninth grade science students, hawks, and French people. I'm gonna fuck you up. Your base, immoral actions have gone on for too long. This slaughter is completely unjustified and will henceforth be considered an act of war(t). Because I am a toad. And toads have warts. Except I'm not a toad and I am a frog. Assholes.



2011-09-30 [Lord Josmar]: Elftown?


THIS! IS! BOB'S DINER!


*Kicks Frog down into a jar with a cotton ball soaked in Chloroform.*


I better get a damn A on this biology exam!
2011-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: B-but this is Spanish 101... *points at the Mexicans chained to the radiator*
2011-09-30 [Lord Josmar]: Spanish 101?


THIS! IS! AMERICA!


*Kicks radiator chained mexicans into a jar with a cotton ball soaked in Chloroform.*


I better get a damn A+!
2011-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *the king of Mexico is pleased by your shenanigans and gives you a solid A-*
2011-09-30 [Lord Josmar]: A-?


THIS! IS! GETTING REPETITIVE!


*Kicks this joke down into oncoming traffic*


Imma getting me a taco now!
2011-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Make sure you don't LSHYSFOAYDYT.


Sorry, mild stroke. I meant to say make sure you don't drop it.
2011-09-30 [kians mummy]: sammie's speeches
2011-09-30 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: You should fire your speech writer. They can't spell
2011-09-30 [Tynuka-Rhytishy]: =/
2011-09-30 [Nioniel]: The Best of Elftown
2011-09-30 [Paul Doyle]: Speaches and Scream?
2011-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I spick speaches in spGeorgia sometimes.
2011-10-01 Mystin: Is anyone else sick? I want to kick allergies in the nuts.
2011-10-01 Mystin: On [The Best of Elftown@wiki] could you add my steampunk manipulation? I think it would go well there.
2011-10-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-10-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-01 [foxyvixen17]: wows
2011-10-01 [kians mummy]: Fans of fans
2011-10-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-01 Mystin: What is your wiki about Sammie?
2011-10-01 Mystin: Also, why all the drama with [crew manual@wiki]? When I was banned I told Djx and everyone else that their opinions are allowed unless directly making an insult towards something or something deemed as breaking the rules.
2011-10-01 Mystin: By the way, "I am not back" just updating my relations on how I am doing //[Mystin for Crew@wiki] for details. <3
2011-10-01 [Sagacious Turkey]: We now have a new manager (who I assume we can trust to follow B's D's never-delete-anything and never-ban-anyone rule).
2011-10-01 [Nekko fox]: As new manager, I shall now delete everyone and ban everything.
2011-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Here here! *raises wine glass*


Wait...
2011-10-02 [Nekko fox]: WINEGLASS! BANNED!


*The wineglass staggers off, sobbing drunkenly*
2011-10-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: sorry, but banning has been banned. says so on that poster *points to poster that says banning is banned* see?
2011-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of deleting everyone: Delete Sunrose Now!
2011-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Sorry, that poster isn't valid. *points at the poster that says posters are banned*
2011-10-02 [Tekkon KinKreet]: neither is your action *points at a carving in the wall that says pointing is banned*
2011-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: MY WALL!
2011-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Now I'll never get the security deposit back for this otherwise perfect place! *kicks a table*... *the roof collapses*...
2011-10-02 [Nekko fox]: THE ROOF IS BAND!


*The roof is now, magically, a rubber band*


  

2011-10-02 [Nuada]: O.o
2011-10-02 Mystin: *break dances*
2011-10-02 [Nekko fox]: *Promotes [9jlriexqk,ktpk] to Monkey-in-Training. Progress is slow and the training is soon abandoned because real monkeys catch on quicker and can handle change better*
2011-10-02 [Nekko fox]: *The chair from table six takes on the role of Monkey-In-Training and succeeds, surpassing everyone's expectations*
2011-10-02 [Nekko fox]: *The family at table six is still missing its ketchup, but now is also missing a chair so their infant has to stand. The toddler, ignoring the standard instinct of self-preservation commonly seen in the rest of its species, is devoured by the floor-roaches, not even bothering to run away*




Stupid lazy babies...
2011-10-03 Jesus: SON OF A FLABBERGASTED CAT! I come back from my vacation and Mystin1 is still here?!? Does god have no mercy? Does this look infected to you?!?
2011-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You picked an inconvenient time to come back, Jesus. He just showed back up.


Usually you only take three day vacations before you return. What was the hold up this time?
2011-10-03 Jesus: Traffic.
2011-10-03 [Nekko fox]: By traffic, are you referring to that elderly couple you ran over, backed up over, and then ran over again?
2011-10-03 Mystin: Wait, where did the 1 come in? LOL. Btw if you look at the older comments, I am back temporarily to say hello because Thunder Cid ran me off Fake, so you can blame him =P
2011-10-03 [Nekko fox]: I BLAME NOTHING!


*Bans blame*
2011-10-03 Mystin: I already kicked *blame* in the nuts months ago for banning me lol
2011-10-03 [Nekko fox]: *Bans nuts. The Peanut Man refuses and has to be executed and thrown in the dumpster to deter the homeless*
2011-10-05 Mystin: going back to Fake, nice seeing you all. Check back sometime next year. Love jay!
2011-10-05 Jesus: There was no witnesses! *snaps Nekko Foxs neck* None!
2011-10-05 [kians mummy]: The depression help wiki
2011-10-05 [Stephen]: This is a really weird place to post that link. xP
2011-10-05 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: If you think you really are suffering from depression, shouldn't you seek professional help? Are you qualified to diagnose and treat depression? Is anybody on your team qualified?
2011-10-05 [Stephen]: Well -- not that I've read (or even clicked on) Sammie's link, but it does generally help people with depression to talk to others who are understanding/caring/etc. One of the best treatments to depression is the help and understanding of friends and family. Therapy and meds of course can help a lot too.


I think the term depression is meant to be used more in a "Are you sad/unhappy/etc? then we'll be here to talk to you and try to make you feel better about things."


Then again, I could be completely wrong since I haven't actually looked at the page. =P
2011-10-05 [Nekko fox]:
  





What are your qualifications to diagnose and treat a serious psychological issue? Can people sue you if their loved one, who has taken your advice, kills themselves? Can you prescribe medication to curb depression-related symptoms? Also, did the niggers, chinks, and spiks set you up to post that abortion of logic on this wiki?


*A group of racially diverse people glance up from the meal they were enjoying in their truck, parked comfortably on Table 3, whose screaming residents had long since fallen silent*


Please, it's for the local paper.


*The group goes back to eating their meals*
2011-10-05 [Stephen]: It's him again. He likes to frequent the various Bob's Diners around the world. D:
2011-10-05 Mystin: Woah, everyone stop attacking Sammie, her wiki is not too far off from my wiki [The Forgotten@wiki] so chill.
2011-10-05 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from beating the wiki with a brick and a broken bottle*


The cessation of things in Bob's Diner is banned!


*Puts up a sign saying "Stop Stopping Things!" but its existence is in itself a fallacy and disappears shortly thereafter due to previous bans*
2011-10-06 [Ninja Smurf]: hmm... A depression wiki? Really? Throwing things at people is so much better therapy! *Throws a stack of dirty plates at [Nekko fox] * See!! I feel better already!
2011-10-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his newspaper*


I'm docking your pay for that.
2011-10-06 Jesus: St Peters docking you for that as well.
2011-10-06 Saint Peter: Damn straight.
2011-10-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Heck, even the boat is docking.


*the boat looks up from his platter of barnacles*
2011-10-07 [twitchboy]: lol docking
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=docking
2011-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-10-07 [Tekkon KinKreet]: BAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHA
2011-10-07 [Nekko fox]: Am I one of the few people who knew what 'docking' meant before the UD link was posted?
2011-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I've know ever since that creepy guy propositioned me back in high school.


Best night ever, by the way.
2011-10-07 [Fruit Loops]: bobs rest stop & glory hole ?
2011-10-07 [Sheamus Finn]: Deviously camoflauged as the soap dispenser.....
2011-10-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: At least its clean
2011-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: True, true... *pushes soap dispenser over hotdog*... *ketchup drips out*...
2011-10-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: At least we found a use for the soap dispencer
2011-10-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: sure thats ketchup and not blood? *Smashes Mort's head against the counter* I'm needing some fucking anger therapy.
2011-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Therapy, you say? Have you heard of Sammie's new, highly successful wiki, the depression help wiki?
2011-10-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: NAH. I AIINT DEPPRESSED..SOMETHING ELSE ENTIRELY. *CHOPS MORT'S HEAD OFF WITH AN AXE.*
2011-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: And how does that make you feel? *Mort's head jots things down in a little notepad*
2011-10-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: *STUFF'S MORTS HEAD WITH USED CONDOMS* FUCK OFF
2011-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Umph hfw duf thft mfke yuh ffuh? *Mort's head jots down things in a little padnote*
2011-10-07 [Nekko fox]: *Picks up Mort's head stuffs Infinity inside him*


There, that should keep the good juices from leaking out
2011-10-07 [Sheamus Finn]: *looks down Mort's neck* Hey there isn't any candy in here!
2011-10-07 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: puts dynamite inside her head. sorry mort even as a head you are fucking useless
2011-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *gurgle gurgle*... *continues jotting down notes*...
2011-10-08 [Sheamus Finn]: Mort do you kiss your mom with that mouth?
2011-10-08 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: no but i do
2011-10-08 [Sheamus Finn]: *Takes out camcorder, Smiles hopefully*
2011-10-08 [American Revolutionary]: *busts into the door at 50 miles per hour* HALT!!!! THIS IS A K.G.B OPERATION!!!! *tackles [Sheamus Finn]* youve got intel!!!!
2011-10-08 [Sheamus Finn]: Sorry officer, Irish Republican... *shows ID*
2011-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: HE'S GOT A GUN!! *quick draws his six-shooter and shoots Famous Shin 10 times in the face*
2011-10-08 [Fruit Loops]: Its a raid !! http://youtu.be/60pDA5IlUP0
2011-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oOlDewpCfZQ&NR=1
2011-10-08 [Nekko fox]: Hold on there young man! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cqi5F5MqqTQ&feature=feedlik
2011-10-08 TROLL ELFF: ELFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF TROLLL
2011-10-09 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-09 [American Revolutionary]: *gets off of [Sheamus Finn]* sorry
2011-10-09 [Nekko fox]: *Puts [American Revolutionary] back on Femur Shin*


The ride isn't over, please remain seated until the end of the ride. Thank you for riding today.
2011-10-09 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: And remember to keep your arms, legs and head(s) inside for the duration of the ride. Thank you and enjoy Bob's Diner
2011-10-09 [Nekko fox]: Please do not feed [9jlriexqk,ktpk] or any of the condemned during the duration of the ride or you will be asked to exit the Castiel and walk back.
2011-10-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: LolLol
2011-10-09 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Fuck off.
2011-10-09 [Nekko fox]: Fucking off was banned long before I was in charge. The niggers said so while they were eviscerating cattle and devouring their delicious young.
2011-10-09 [Sheamus Finn]: Wait were the devouring the young cattle or their young? *Tosses Castiel back to Nekko*
2011-10-10 [American Revolutionary]: *is tossed around like a beachball* wheeeeee!!!!!!!
2011-10-10 [Nekko fox]: *Bops Castiel back into the air, towards Ashamed Fin*


Yes, to both.
2011-10-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-10-11 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-11 [American Revolutionary]: *hits the floor and deflates* ohhhhhh nooooooooooo
2011-10-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: Are they cashew nuts?
2011-10-11 [Sheamus Finn]: Or filberts? walnuts perhaps? *Hands Castiel a bike pump*
2011-10-11 [9jlriexqk,ktpk]: what the hell is filberts?
2011-10-11 [Nekko fox]: THIS is a filberts!


*Cudgels Infinity with their new-hire name Filberts (plural, as he has a conjoined twin who is also named Filbert), who screams and flails wildly, knocking condiments askew and knocking Pedro the street urchin over*
2011-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yup. Walnuts. *points at the walnut tree, who has his genitals pressed up against the wall*


DAMMIT, I EAT OFF THAT WALL!


*kicks Filberts*
2011-10-12 [Nekko fox]: What about Dick-In-Yer-Mouth?


those are the best nuts around.


*Pre-orders available at eBay, Amazon, Wal-Mart, Shell Gas Stations, and most any other location. Except Apple, they got hit so bad with the economy even they lost Jobs*
2011-10-12 [American Revolutionary]: *pumps self up in a rather erotic way* mmmmhhhhhhh
2011-10-13 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: YOU'RE ALL NUTS!!!
2011-10-13 [American Revolutionary]: *is re-inflated* not nuts just not tightly wrapped upstairs
2011-10-13 [Stephen]: xD
Mean pun, Nekko!


.. funny, though. x)
2011-10-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: 
2011-10-13 [Avaz]: What is this, I don't even
2011-10-13 [Sheamus Finn]: Wow, two thoughts. 1. The military has lowered the IQ requirement. And that must have been one messy money shot......
2011-10-13 [Avaz]: I think she went to those "3D Experience" theaters. The ones where the seats are rigged, and if there's, say, water splashing on the screen, a little tube on the seat in front of you mists you. Or, if the screen shows some movement (say, an elevator, or a car ride), the seats move too.
2011-10-13 [American Revolutionary]: *bonces around aimlessly and bounces into shameless shin*
2011-10-13 [Sheamus Finn]: So, she went to a movie wearing a skirt and no panties.... Yeah, TOTALLY believeable.... *sticks Zero with a pin*
2011-10-13 [Stephen]: What?
You haven't heard about those newfangled creations? 'Course they can get you knocked up without real intercourse. Why, it's perfectly logical and believable. She'd never be unfaithful to her dearly beloved and fuck the hot guy who lives a few houses down.


Such little faith in people you all have! *shakes fist*
2011-10-13 [Nekko fox]: 
2011-10-13 Mary: Yeah! Pretty much the same thing totally happened to me! Good thing my husband, Joseph, believes me.
2011-10-14 [Imperator]: *Kicks in the rotten door*
Sigh....
*Sits down at rotten table*
H-hey! Excuse me! *snaps at waiter*
I'd like a glass of Turkey Milk, please. Dumbass.
2011-10-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *waiter shoots a turkey and tosses it on table* enjoy
2011-10-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SbmxqfGkg1Q
2011-10-14 [Nekko fox]:   


*watches as the doctor sails off into oblivion*


Wait, when could I afford being in a doctor's office?


*Realizes this isn't a doctor's office but a crack house and he's delirious from all the cocaine he smoked*


Wait, when could I afford crack cocaine?


*wonders if this is the real life, or is this just fantasy*


*Gets caught in a landslide*


*Escapes from reality*


*family opens the door*


*get on the floor*


*everybody walk the dinosaur*
2011-10-14 [American Revolutionary]: *deflates yet again* nooooooooooo
2011-10-14 [Avaz]: I think Heavy needs a Medic.
2011-10-14 [Nekko fox]: FUCK YOUR MEDIC! HE'S IN ORBIT NOW.


  

2011-10-14 [Imperator]: What?! No one goes to K-Mart anymore!
2011-10-15 Jesus: I shit better comments than these! Bobs Diner is in need of better quality comments. *slaps the post man at table two* Wheres my new issue of smut? Give it to me! Why is mystin1 back in here?! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT!
2011-10-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-15 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-15 [Nekko fox]: and on an unrelated note.


  

2011-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... honey, do we need another deer?


*the honey say nothing, as it is an inanimate object*
2011-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, dear! My wife is giving me the cold shoulder!


*the deer says nothing as it is dead*... *the shoulder simply shivers and covers itself with a blanket*...
2011-10-15 [Imperator]: You know what deer rhymes with? Beer. *joins Occupy Wall Street protests with a "Giv me frea Bere" sign*
2011-10-15 [Imperator]: Sometimes people get creative when naming things: ¿?ø¤º°paryt°º¤ø¿?
2011-10-15 [Imperator]: Do you think this is what the Believers meant when they said to bring our chatter to a better suited place? *all the diners are wearing suits*
2011-10-15 Justin Bieber: Any conversation about me is appropriate for any fucking place.
2011-10-15 @Not logged in user@: Wow! Justin Bieber! Can I get an autograph and a picture?!
2011-10-15 [Imperator]: What a unique name, "@Not logged in user@," is...
2011-10-15 Selena Gomez: Justin! I'm not really a singer, will you be my boyfriend so I can get record deals?
2011-10-15 j@y!: Wtf?!
2011-10-15 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *runs in with chainsaw, hacking wildly at Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez. Stuffs severed parts into blender, adds orange soda and hits puree* Mmmmm nothing goes better with pop stars than soda pop
2011-10-16 [Avaz]: Add pop rocks to complete the pop circle.
2011-10-16 [Imperator]: Pop rocks are awful! They hurt your mouth, jumpin' around n' everything!
2011-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *Michael Jackson bursts in*


Did somebody say pop?! Hee-hee!


*he spins, grabs a little boy, and moonwalks out the door*... *everybody claps and returns to their meals*...
2011-10-16 [Nekko fox]: Wait, did I just see what I thought I saw?


*Reaches up and touches what he thought was the walls melting into blue and green shapes*


*It turns out it isn't an acid trip, the damned walls are melting*


A shit, not again. Pablo? PABLO! Clean up this mess you made.


*Pablo weakly tries explaining that it was Nekko's order to make the walls out of cotton-candy icecream and green jelly-beans*


NO EXCUSES!


*Beats one of the customers with the back of a serving tray*


And let that be a lesson to you Pablo!
2011-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Stop that! What are you doing?!


*grabs the serving tray*


This is company property! *points at the label on the tray that says "McDonald's - Do Not Steal!"*


Don't damage it! Here, this is probably fine... *hands you a brick labeled "McDonald's - Stop Stealing Our Bricks!"*
2011-10-16 [Nekko fox]: *Eats the brick*


*shits marbles*
2011-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *tiny, hungry, hungry, multi-colored hippos start rapidly consuming the marbles*... *upon seeing this, Mort shits bricks*...
2011-10-16 [Avaz]: *uses those bricks to construct a wall*
2011-10-16 [Nekko fox]: *The wall becomes a McDonald's*
2011-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah, the circle of life.


*puts on his mask and bursts into the McDonald's and starts shooting at employees with a shotgun*... *makes off with a sack full of bricks*...
2011-10-16 [Avaz]: *The Kool Aid Man bursts through the other wall* "OH YEAH!"
2011-10-16 [American Revolutionary]: *fires a rocket at the kool aid man, causing his fruit punch to splash everywhere* take that you punch filled pervert!!!
2011-10-16 [Kitailec]: Oh. ): Poor Kool Aid Man...
2011-10-17 [Fruit Loops]: hears the hawaiian punch midget comming to avenge kool aid man...
2011-10-17 [Nekko fox]: No, no, that's just a regular midget coming to avenge the seven midgets that made up the guy inside the Kool-Aid man suit.
2011-10-17 [American Revolutionary]: *hides from the clan of angry drarves after the koolaid man wo they saw as snow white
2011-10-17 [Nekko fox]: But wait...


  



Aren't dwarves but a different variety of midget? So their weakness should be the same!




*he sets things on slightly more elevated shelves. All the dwarves scream their frustrations before perishing*
2011-10-18 [Nekko fox]: HOLY SHIT! SUDDENLY LEGO HITLER!


  

2011-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-10-18 [American Revolutionary]: *salutes hitler* sieg heil!!!! hiel hitler!! the riech will rise again!!!!
2011-10-18 [Nekko fox]: And THIS time it shall last 17 years!
2011-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I dunno, that's a little long. Maybe shoot for a little less, like maybe... nine years? Yeah, that sounds good.


Nine, nine, nine!
2011-10-18 [loki86]: I'm stupid
2011-10-18 [Nekko fox]: Thank you sammie. Your statement shall be archived and stored away so that future generations may know the truth as well.


  

2011-10-18 [Avaz]: I agree. But I won't tell you which of those things I agree with.
2011-10-18 [American Revolutionary]: lol
2011-10-19 [kians mummy]: Its ok, considering it's not even my account, as mine has a ! on the end of it
2011-10-19 [kians mummy]: and my last letter of my name is changing from today.
2011-10-19 [loki86]: I'm still stupid
2011-10-19 [American Revolutionary]: wow pzzzow fuckin change
2011-10-19 [Teufelsweib]: and the C is for...? :D
2011-10-19 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: So how about those Patriots?
2011-10-19 [Tekkon KinKreet]: they started a revolution. pulled off somethign called the T party. oh and they scalped indians?
2011-10-19 [Nekko fox]: I thought they were just ideolistic cannibals.
2011-10-20 [Tekkon KinKreet]: we're talking about the football team now???
2011-10-20 [American Revolutionary]: duhhhh ummm
2011-10-20 [kians mummy]: [Teufelsweib] The c is for Coppick
2011-10-20 thick stinking dick sack: Ha Ha, there is no [sammie h!] or [@3806] anymore, she has changed her name, by the way, [@1] and [@5555] have got aids + the shits, and silvie is going out with a nigger
2011-10-20 [American Revolutionary]: you know tsds, thats a mouthfull of crap for you to be spilling, say auf viedersien to your shitty balls
2011-10-20 [kians mummy]: Hmmmmmm, I don't like people talking shit about some good workers on here.
2011-10-20 [American Revolutionary]: *slits tsds's throat, shit spilling all over the table*
2011-10-20 [kians mummy]: Slices there face off
2011-10-20 [American Revolutionary]:                                                                        im fucking sick of ur spam *throws spam at the wall*
2011-10-20 [kians mummy]: What spam
2011-10-20 [Fruit Loops]: thinks about the feasability of being a door to door salesman for spam...


2011-10-20 [Teufelsweib]: and here I was hoping it would mean Sammie Claus =/
2011-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: MY SPAM! MY WALL!! *wakes up and crawls out of the trashcan*


You guys, I just had the awfullest dream that someone threw my spam at the w-


MY SPAM!! MY WALL!!!
2011-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of walls, why did you delete the wall of "Mortified PenguinMortified Penguin" spam, Sam?! We have strict rules about comment deletion here, as I so clearly stated three minutes ago in the comment above this one and below the one about the SPAM! on my WALL!!
2011-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Sam was controlled by the ghost of Hitler that was possessed by the devil.
2011-10-20 [American Revolutionary]: lol
2011-10-20 [twitchboy]: who unfortunately was forced to do it by the jedi mind control powers of the one true evil- Jar jar Binks
2011-10-20 [twitchboy]: 
2011-10-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-20 [Nekko fox]:   




CURSE YOU DARTH BINKS!
2011-10-21 [Imperator]: The Star Wars blu-ray release has twice as many 1 star reviews as 5 star reviews on Amazon. That's right, GO FUCK YOURSELF LUCAS! *fires up the VHS player for the old crappy originals*
2011-10-22 [American Revolutionary]: *pops popcorn and sits down watching the dinosaur age star wars* oldies but goodies
2011-10-22 [Galanthor]: They just should have cloned jedis and left out Jar Jar Binks and mediclorians and the new movies would have been awesome (come on you all wanted to see an army of Yodas)
2011-10-22 [American Revolutionary]: an army of yodas? tiny but mighty, we are *gets kicked in the shin by a yoda cosplayer* dammit!! *uses the yoda actor as a football*
2011-10-22 [Nekko fox]: Jar Jar Binks.....
2011-10-22 [Galanthor]: heh...Gungan Sith Lords
2011-10-22 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-22 [Araglas]: Bum bum BUM!
2011-10-23 [Avaz]: That's my favorite NO U image.
2011-10-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-10-23 [Nekko fox]: 
2011-10-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I am on my laptop and have no interesting images to post. NOT EVEN THIS ONE.


  

2011-10-24 [Sheamus Finn]:   
2011-10-25 [Stephen]: Yay!
Now I can comment on Elftown, when I'm on Elfpack. x3
2011-10-25 [Stephen]: Using an iframe inside of an iframe, fun.


I wonder if you'd make issues if you iframed something in that way like 30 times..




IE:
ET iframe into EP, into ET, into E12, into Wri, into ET, into Mus, etc etc.
2011-10-25 [Nekko fox]: I SMELL NERD!


*burns down local schools*


I SMELL ASHES AND DESPAIR!
2011-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, sorry, my burrito's burning... *takes pizza out of the oven and starts eating it*...
2011-10-25 Mort: wat
2011-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... seems legit, yo. *high fives what is undeniably himself*
2011-10-25 [American Revolutionary]: *morts high five of darkness raises the lich king from his pornographic prison in some ol gannys underwear and he releases the spawn of the apocalypse*
2011-10-25 [Sheamus Finn]: How'd my boss get here? *loads his shotgun*
2011-10-25 [twitchboy]: to bad the lich king was defeated by a guild of dwarfs
2011-10-25 [Nekko fox]: They prefer the term "fucking shrimp-sized balls of tiny", it's the technical, scientific term.
2011-10-26 Jesus: Thats not funny. My little known half-brother is half dwarf.
2011-10-26 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Lol your mom was a whore
2011-10-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: and a liar! i mean really? we all know what really happened mary.
2011-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: She died from radiation poisoning?
2011-10-26 [Fruit Loops]: She was actually one of sigourney weaver's past lives and the first one to become infected by the ALIEN ! Back then it was allot more congenial, before suffering the effets of de-evolution. Once it tried to save humanity now it means its utter destruction !
2011-10-26 [American Revolutionary]: thats funny
2011-10-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: yah some thing calling itself god hit it from the back which led to everything fruit loops was talking about. hit it from the back repeatedly, LIKE A BOSS, which is what i was actually talking about.
2011-10-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: oh and marys husband sat in the corner and cried while it happened.
2011-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I'm pretty sure Pierre was run oven by a carriage.
2011-10-26 [American Revolutionary]: while he was singing yankee doodle and doing the chrleston rag
2011-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Chrleston looks up from his soup*


"MY RAG!"
2011-10-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *Cleveland pops in* "thats naaaassssty."
2011-10-26 [Sheamus Finn]: giggity....
2011-10-26 [American Revolutionary]: ....?
2011-10-27 [Avaz]: Well, aaaallll right *head shake*
2011-10-27 [Nekko fox]: 
2011-10-27 [WolfDragon]: 'Sup guys. I can see that you're all crazy. Thought I'd join in on the conversation XD
2011-10-27 [American Revolutionary]: *watches the wrench whack mort in the face repeatedly* wonder if he feels that
2011-10-27 [Tekkon KinKreet]: mort gave up all mortal bodily feeling long ago. his cyborg/penguin/1%human body feels no pain.
2011-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: OH GOD, THE PAIN!!


Wait, crap. *drinks a glass of water*


Oh, GOD! The PAIN!


"Nope. Next!"


Damn it! *the next guy steps up to try out for the part of Guy Getting Hit In Face With Wrench #1*
2011-10-28 [American Revolutionary]: *gets hit in the face, causing severe brain damage and involuntarily shits himself*
2011-10-28 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Lol, involuntarily. Yeah, right
2011-10-28 [Nekko fox]: Hey, everybody needs SOMETHING they can do involuntarily. Like myself, I am an uncontrollably nice person.


*turns around and starts stabbing the woman behind him who was obviously sneaking up on him to bash a lamp over his head*


GOTCHA YOU SNEAKY BITCH!


"But I just wanted ketchup!"


TOO BAD! YOU'RE DEAD NOW!


*And so it was*
2011-10-28 [Avaz]: "YOUR DEAD NOW!" is an incomplete sentence; it is missing a verb and object. The subject (which is the dead that belongs to you) is now... doing something, we just don't know what. For comparison, "YOU'RE DEAD NOW!" is an example of a complete sentence, as is, "YOUR DEAD NOW ARE WALKING!".
2011-10-28 [American Revolutionary]: *drools, mentally handicapped*
2011-10-28 [Araglas]: *dragging dead customers into the kitchen whisteling* Fresh meat! Keep 'em coming ya'll!
2011-10-28 [Sheamus Finn]:   
I'm on Bob's diner Yay!
2011-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: "YOUR DEAD NOW!" is an interjection. Nekko was simply shocked at the state of now and was expressing this shock to his good friend, [Hedda], the owner of the wiki.
2011-10-28 [Nekko fox]: Thank you Mort for your points made by Deamus Shin.
2011-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Your and/or welcome. *skewers some shrimp with one of the points made by Samus Aran*


Here, have a free trophy:   
2011-10-29 [Fruit Loops]: trophy !? thats my gift wrapped double fister !
2011-10-29 [Stephen]: Such a troll. :P
2011-10-29 [Fruit Loops]: http://trolltown.com/ , i was dissapointed it was not like elf town :_(
2011-10-29 [Nekko fox]: Trolltown isn't as wonderful as Elftown because they lack a Bob's Diner.


I know.


I burned that bridge long ago. And the warehouse next door.
2011-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: At Trolltown, they just elf with people.


*collects insurance on his burnt warehouse*
2011-10-29 [Nekko fox]: Hey, I want my cut.


*The butcher hands him a slab of beef*


Thank ye kindly sir....


NOW GET OUT OF MY DINER!


*Legally changes his name to Bob's Diner and takes possession of the diner so it is now Bob's Diner's Diner*
2011-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *has his name illegally changed to Bob's Diner's Diner*


I'm not the diner! You can't take possession of me!


Sincerely,


BDD
2011-10-29 [Araglas]: *pokes head out of Kitchen* Hey! I need more dead cutsomers!! We're running out of meat!!
2011-10-29 [Stephen]: Jojo!
2011-10-29 [Nekko fox]: JOJO IS A LIE!
2011-10-29 CaptainJeanLucPicard: Engage, warp speed ten number 1!
2011-10-29 [Nekko fox]: *Warp speed ten number 1 shyly declines the engagement proposal, saying that it is waiting for the right man*
2011-10-30 [Araglas]: *pokes head out of kitchen* Hey, can we stop by Romulous? I could use two or three Romulans for desert.
2011-10-30 [Imperator]: Are you stupid?! Romulus doesn't exist anymore! *smashes a rare bottle of Romulan ale over your head*
2011-10-30 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Blue eggs
2011-10-30 [Flisky]: (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
2011-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: MY TABLE!


Would you people stop doing that?!
2011-10-31 [Flisky]: (╯°□°）╯︵ uınbuǝd pǝıɟıʇɹoɯ
2011-10-31 [American Revolutionary]: uinbued what the hell kind of language is that?


2011-10-31 [Flisky]: (╯°□°）╯︵ nʎɹıʞ oɹǝz
2011-10-31 [Imperator]: What do all the symbol thingies mean?!
2011-10-31 [Avaz]: I think Asian Kirby is angry. o_o;
2011-10-31 [Fruit Loops]: (>'.')<^>
2011-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY GOD. HE HAS A PLATE WITH A CHICKEN BEAK ON IT.
2011-10-31 [Fruit Loops]: i ordered a whole one ! who ate my kak !?!
2011-10-31 [Nekko fox]: We through kaks away that are left unsupervised for any period of time.


*four children sneak off with one a kak while dozens of others are left ignored and unattended*
2011-11-01 [Flisky]: (>-_-)>︵ ┻━┻


There, now Asian Kirby flipped a table.
2011-11-01 [Avaz]: Good thing he's only handling a table and not a car. LOLIMADEARACISTJOKE
2011-11-01 Mystin: Can someone tell me if I got a badge for my prose poetry submission as a participant?
2011-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *doesn't look up from his newspaper*


Yeah, that sounds good. Around back will do fine. Just put it with the rest of the boxes.
2011-11-01 [American Revolutionary]: *is now upside down* what the hell???
2011-11-01 [Fruit Loops]: sit on my face and tell me that u looooveee me , i'll sit on your face and tell you i love youuuu toooooo.... :D
2011-11-02 Mystin: Anyone?
2011-11-02 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: So what's in the rest of the boxes out back?
2011-11-02 [Nekko fox]: WHO SAID ANYTHING ABOUT BOXES!


*The boxes raise their hands*


YOU'RE INANIMATE!


*the boxes whimper and grow silent*
2011-11-02 [Imperator]: I put a box in the backyard once... but then it rained.
2011-11-02 [Nekko fox]: The rain was sent by aliens to destroy the box menace.
2011-11-03 [Sheamus Finn]: That wasn't rain I had to piss.... Sorry.
2011-11-03 [Nekko fox]: YOUR AN ALIEN!


*La Migra drags Ashamed Finn out of his home at three in the morning and throws him into a police cruiser while his crying family tries to argue that you are a national before carting you off and having you deported*
2011-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *while backing out of the driveway, La Migra runs over Finn's dog, Jake, before doing donuts in his yard and peeling out, leaving tire marks everywhere*


NO, WWWAAAAAAIIIIIIIT! DON'T GO!!! *runs after the police cruiser*


YOU FORGOT THE REST OF THEM!! *points at the sobbing family*
2011-11-03 Mystin: Pricks~
2011-11-03 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: You're pricking who or what? What are you pricking with? A needle? A rose? A tack?
2011-11-03 [Nekko fox]: A shovel.


*La Migra pricks Famous Shin with their shovels. At high velocity. All before ejecting him into Mexico from the rear seat of the cruiser. also at high velocity*
2011-11-03 [Avaz]: *High Velocity, the aging superhero, looks up from his lunch and sees the targets approaching him. He cries out* OH SHHHH
2011-11-03 [Nekko fox]: *Lord Ohshhhh looks up from his meal and sees High Velocity, his arch nemesis, standing and looking shocked. Without missing a beat, he pulls his death laser from beneath his billowing cape and fires a kill-zap-ray at High Velocity*


DIE MOTHERFU-
2011-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mo-Therfu, a benevolent street urchin, looks up from his plate of benevolent sea urchins*


"HIGH VELOCITY, NNNNOOOOOO!!!" *Mo-Therfu dives in front of the kill-zap-ray (Copyright © 2011 Disney) and gets hit directly in the body*


*he coughs up blood and urchin particles before keeling over dead and fulfilling the prophecy set forth by Lord Ohshhhh*
2011-11-03 [Nekko fox]: MO-THERFU! RY JU DIE?!


*A sobbing, ancient Japanese women cradles the bloody, partially disintegrated body of the urchin child*


Famiry rove you! Ry you die ronery stree u-chin?


*U-chin looks up at the sound of his name, then ignores it because he has chin to develop, thusly he blasts off through the roof (leaving a chin-shaped hole) to do chin exercises beneath a waterfall in China*
2011-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *across the globe, Awaterfall patiently awaits the arrival of his dear friend U-chin, so they can do erotic exercises together*


*meanwhile, back in wherever Bob's Diner is located at, Famiry, upset over the tragic loss of his younger brother, Mo-Therfu, starts randomly firing lasers*


*the lasers, now unemployed, seek new job opportunities elsewhere*
2011-11-03 [Nekko fox]: *Elsewhere is conquered by the national libertarian party of Squipton and their borders become closed, all traveling in and out of the nation being targeted by militant groups and over-enthusiastic nationals. The lasers are all gunned down when they try to gain entrance*
2011-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *now in possession of Entrance, the magical stone that transforms lasers into powerful entities known as "Gunned Down" (who have powers that make them immortal similar to the Phoenix Down, but not quite as copyright and a lot cooler, because it has the word "gun" in it), the Gunned Down overthrow the Squipton National Libertarian Party and move their armies from Elsewhere into China*


*U-chin and Awaterfall are alerted to the advancing military force by Anin Formant and begin to gather their own forces to counter the advancing Gunned Down military*
2011-11-06 [Stephen]: o_o
2011-11-06 [Mortified Penguin]: WAY TO RUIN THE CONVERSATION, JERK.
2011-11-06 [Avaz]: *Jerk looks up dazed and drunkenly from his bottle of rum, wondering why people keep talking about him, a single tear rolls down his cheek*
2011-11-06 [Nekko fox]: Avast, not Avaz. Geez, some people...
2011-11-06 [Nekko fox]: *Takes a rope and boards an enemy ship, owned by Elsewhere and the Elitist Party of Snooty Hum-Drums*
2011-11-06 [Avaz]: Avax also works.
2011-11-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Ajax?
2011-11-07 [Avaz]: Not quite. It's the last letter only that seems to be the wildcard.
2011-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Avag?
2011-11-07 [Nekko fox]: Avacks?
2011-11-07 [Lord Josmar]: Avanti?
2011-11-07 [Nekko fox]: Why isn't this thing avanti-ing?
2011-11-07 [Imperator]: Shanti-shanti. *pseudo-Oriental bow*
2011-11-07 [Avaz]: Yes, Mort. Yes, Nekko. And yes, Jos.
2011-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]: AND NO, IMP.
2011-11-08 [Lord Josmar]: *A little minion of Satan looks up with a tear in its eye before lifting from its table and fluttering out. Then it sets the adjoining orphanage on fire.*
2011-11-08 [Nekko fox]: Damn it, again?! we need those orphans for seasoning!


*One of the orphans comes screaming into the diner before collapsing in a twitching heap, his blackened skin crackling slightly. Nekko bends down and hefts a leg, biting off a chunk and chewing*


Alright, I think we can still work with this. We'll just say it's hickory smoked orphan.
2011-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *the health inspector quickly turns in the direction of the corpse, but, thanks to his blindness, deafness, complete paralysis, and inability to smell after years of cocaine abuse, he notices nothing and goes back to eating a squeaking rat which he cannot taste, because the maffia cut his tongue off*


Whew. That was close. He almost noticed an infraction that could have cost us our license. *puts a hair net on the charred corpse*


There we go. *goes back to the orgy raging in the soup*
2011-11-08 [Stephen]: Impressive. Complete paralysis, yet he still moves. o3o
2011-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: It was, uh... Magnets.
2011-11-08 [Nekko fox]: "It was magnets. You can't explain that." ~ Bill O'Reilly
2011-11-08 [Avaz]: "Fuckin' magnets, how do they work?" ~ Insane Clown Posse
2011-11-09 [Fruit Loops]: designs a babe magnet, switches it on, babies come flying to him from all over :(... and david bowie :D
2011-11-09 [Pillowthief]: That's because he EATS them! That sick, sick, bastard... and that was totally a sock stuffed in his shorts.
2011-11-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *a sock thief, smuggling 20 pairs of socks in his shorts, looks up*... *he mutters something dark and cryptic and slinks back into the shadows*...
2011-11-09 [Pillowthief]: Slut! You're a frig... Hey! Where are my socks? You will pay...
2011-11-10 [Falling Victim]: Hello (=
2011-11-10 [Pillowthief]: Whore! Where's my socks!
2011-11-10 [Falling Victim]: Socks?
2011-11-10 [Avaz]: Socks the cat mews from under the couch.
2011-11-10 [Pillowthief]: Yes, my socks you- QUIET YOU STUPID NYAN! YOU ARE NOT A SOCK- YOU ARE A FLYING FRUIT PASTRY!
2011-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, his socks! WHERE. ARE. HIS. SOCKS? *slaps Famous Shin around*


WHERE ARE THEY?! They should look something like this... *pulls out a pair of socks labeled "Pillowthief's socks - Do Not Steal"*


RETURN THE STOLEN GOODS. *points at nobody in particular*


*nobody in particular looks up from his soup, confused* THEN PAY WITH YOUR BLOOD. *slices off his arm*
2011-11-10 [Pillowthief]: Yeah where are my soc- Oh, great. NOW WHERES MY ARM?
2011-11-10 [Fruit Loops]: day dreams of an actual bobs diner , with a stripper
2011-11-10 [Avaz]: If it's any consolation, the glue holding up the wallpaper all around this place is weak and the wallpaper is stripping off the walls. ^^; So there's that.
2011-11-10 [Nekko fox]: *A few strippers stop spinning on their poles when Fruit Loops makes a comment, but when they abandon their momentum they inadvertently cause gravity to look judgmentally in their direction and causing them all to slide, screaming, into vats of sulfuric acid placed beneath them as a work incentive. After all, we don't pay our bimbos to talk to customers! We pay them to dance on a pole! And if they can't keep spinning on a pole for seventeen hours and up, then what kind of cheap street whores are they? Huh?! ANSWER ME!*


*No one answers because the previous statement was made as an explanatory sentence centered around an action*


*Lazy strippers*
2011-11-10 [Falling Victim]: So the socks have been found,but now we are missing an arm?
2011-11-10 [Nekko fox]: And some strippers.
2011-11-12 [Pillowthief]: No socks. Found a Nyan cat, but that doesnt help. How do I put my socks on with only one arm? HOW?!
2011-11-12 [Falling Victim]: hmm that is a hard one, I would suggest somehow using you're teeth along with you're one hand
2011-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, just use your teeth. *hands you a bag of teeth labeled "Pillowthief's teeth: Do Not Steal"*
2011-11-12 [Pillowthief]: My teeth collection! I thought they were gone forever! *glomps the collection of Nekko Fox's, Mort's 2nd baby teeth, and Nok's 4th set of teeth*
2011-11-12 [Pillowthief]: *Shamus Flin mumbles discretely* NO! You can NOT! *reaches back like a pimp and slaps a hoe* *Hoe cries and returns to the tool shed*
2011-11-12 [Nekko fox]: My baby teeth! I...wait, I'm still a baby.


*Inexplicably he is an infant*
2011-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Now you're inexplicably too short to stir the soup! I'll have to reassign you someplace else to work...


Hmm... where should I put an infant...? *looks around*... *notices the nursery wing, where children are playing and having fun*...


Ah ha! That IT! *hands Nekko a tiny dagger*


You're on tiger duty. *points at the kitchen, which is completely overrun with tigers for some reason. Probably because SOMEBODY LEFT THE BACKDOOR OPEN AGAIN, PEDRO.*
2011-11-12 Jesus: Wow. I... didnt see that one coming.
2011-11-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Really? It's... it's in the episode synopsis... See? *points at the TV Guide*


"Nekko is inexplicably an infant and gets put on tiger duty. Mort gets an unexpected call from his doctor and finds out he has Super AIDS."


It's like you didn't even read it. Y'know, I worry about you sometimes Jesu-


*Mort's phone unexpectedly rings*


Hang on a second, my phone is unexpectedly ringing. I gotta take this.
2011-11-12 Jesus: Ah. Here it is. Wait- what? we have to wait until next week to find out about how Pedro died? Thats cheap.
2011-11-13 [Mortified Penguin]: It sure is. $3.99 is real cheap for a 6,000 page TV guide.


Anyway, back to my phone call.


Hello, doctor? I wasn't expecting a call. How unexpected! I... I have what? Super maids? Yeah, they're alright, I guess, but sometimes th- huh? Oh... oh... my God... NNNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!


IF ONLY I HAD KNOWN SLEEPING WITH THAT HOMELESS PROSTITUTE'S CORPSE WOULD GIVE ME SUPER AIDS!! *angrily throws last week's guide against the wall*... *it opens to a page that says, "Mort sleeps with a prostitute's corpse that has Super AIDS. Nokaredes remains dead."*
2011-11-13 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: You shouldn't talk about your mom like that. It's disrespectful
2011-11-13 [Nekko fox]: *Returns from the kitchen, covered in blood and squishy chunks of Pedro*


Boss, we're low on imported Mexican orphans named Pedro, we're down to our last six.
2011-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Our last six? OUR LAST SIX?! *breaks a Pedro's neck*


Okay, you five go out and gather more Pedro's.
2011-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: "No more Pedros, señor."


POR QUE NO?!


"Mexico ran out."


Damn it. I'll have to start ordering off brands... *puts in an order for 2,000 new Pedrus*
2011-11-15 [Nekko fox]: Boss, they only have Paedros on hand. That okay?
2011-11-15 [Stephen]:   
2011-11-15 [Olwen]: paedos? where? *flails madly with her fists*
2011-11-15 Jesus: Im sure they have enough Pedros... in Hell. Thats right, other five Pedros. That's where you go when you die. Real bummer about that. Still cant figure how that racist Peter got the Saint title. Probably the same way that Val Kilmer did, the cheating bastard.
2011-11-15 Jesus: *gets punched in the face by wildly flailing fists* MOTHER OF ALL THAT IS HOLY AND GOO-*


>'Mother Mary the Virgin' Joins the chat room 'Bob's Diner'
*Mother Mary strolls into Bobs diner* Yes, my son?


MOM! I thought I told you never to come here! You'll turn into-


>'Mother Mary the Virgin' has changed names to 'Mary the Bisexual Slut'


Crap.
>Jesus logs off chat room 'Bob's Diner'
2011-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]:
>'Saint Joseph' joins the chat room 'Bob's Diner'


Saint Joseph: OH MY GOD!


>Jesus joins the chat room 'Bob's Diner'


Jesus: Yeah?


Saint Joseph: Have you seen the remote?


Jesus: Nah, mang.


Saint Joseph: Damn. Well, see you later. lol


Jesus: lol bai


>'Saint Joseph' logs off chat room 'Bob's Diner'


Mary the Bisexual Slut: I zuck yo dik?


Jesus: *takes off robe and wizard hat*
2011-11-17 [Nekko fox]: She is your dick puppet.
2011-11-18 Jesus: I cast Lvl. 3 Eroticism. Mekko fox turns into a real beautiful woman.
2011-11-18 Jesus: I meditate to regain my mana, before casting Lvl. 8 chicken of the Infinite.
2011-11-18 Jesus: (Notice that I threw that 'M' into there? I was blending Mary with Nekko, which makes it absolutely hilari- Wait. 'takes off robe and wizard hat'? But that leaves me with nothing but my street clothes! AND WE ARE DEFINITELY IN THE WRONG NEIGHBORHOOD for me to be wearing white.


*El Rayes cruise into the diner in their pimped out GTA lowrider elcamino* Yo, Hesuz. These people bother'n you? 'Cause we can make them disappear, just like Pablo. You eses comprede?
2011-11-19 @Not logged in user@: sdgdg
2011-11-19 [Nekko fox]: *Is too busy being a beeee-utiful woman to notice what's going on*
2011-11-19 youmakemewannaughughughughsohardsofastifuckingloveitwhenyoublowmedoitharder: u got a preddy mouth.
2011-11-19 [Nekko fox]: Sorry, I'm too expensive for you.


*takes a roll of nickels from a hobo and leads him into the back room*


*It is easy to overhear Mekko explaining to the hobo that his psychiatric evaluations are limited to hour increments*


*the evaluation goes well and the hobo leaves and feels better about himself, having overcome his mental blocks and personal issues*


*He then goes on to become a very successful and profitable prostitute*


*sadly, his fame causes him to lose himself in the fame and fortune of being a prostitute and he soon dies, drunk and alone, of Super AIDs in a back alley, where he is happened upon by a one Mortified Penguin who has a yearning for something on the stiff side*


*Mekko pockets the side earnings despite it being a gross misconduct and a breach is psychiatric ethics. When confronted about it, she responds with "Who the fuck are you? And why are you calling me a psychiatrist? Do I look like I have the money for a degree? Get off my porch, I have soup to stir"*
2011-11-19 Niggerniggerniggerniggerniggerniggerniggernigger: niggerniggerniggerniggerniggerniggerniggerniggernigger.
2011-11-19 Jesus: You're going to hell. All eight of you. You too Pablo. Not you, Pablo, the other Pablo. No- the one to the left of Pablo. Ah, hell. You're all going to hell.
2011-11-19 [Pillowthief]: *throws dictionary at @Not logged in user@* Its America! Learn English! And you, youmakemewannaughughughughsohardsofastifuckingloveitwhenyoublowmedoitharder, I dont even think hughsohar is even a word! Go back to Prussia!
2011-11-21 [Olwen]: *slaps @Not logged in user@ around the face with a bottle of JD* That'll learn ya
2011-11-21 Hitler: Not my collectible bottle of John Denver- Drink Till You Cant Hear Me™!!
2011-11-21 [Avaz]: That amount of John Denver-DTYCHM is enough to make @Not logged in user@'s @-signs shrivel up and fall off.
2011-11-21 [Nekko fox]: That poor, poor bastard.
2011-11-21 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Quick! Band-Aid!
2011-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Band-Aid® is a brand name. The proper term is adhesive strips.
2011-11-21 Dante Hicks: The man is losing his @-signs and you're getting into a semantics argument?
2011-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Man, name brand word association is one of the more subtle threats to this nation's free trade. It gives the larger, well-known companies an unfair advantage. I'm doing my part to keep the playing field level by weaning people off referring to generic products with brand names.
2011-11-21 Dante Hicks: Way to show some backbone.
2011-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: No spine of Jell-O® here, my friend.
2011-11-21 [Avaz]: i c wat u did thar. :3
2011-11-21 [Nekko fox]: I think I'll have a nice, refreshing Coca-Cola® while I wipe my nose with this Kleenex® and then I will stab you all to death with my Knife®.
2011-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh No®! That™ would Hurt®!©
2011-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Disney® sues over the unlicensed use of the copyright symbol itself, which they acquired the rights to in a hostile takeover (with Knives®) of the Universal Copyright Convention™*


Goddammit®©™.
2011-11-22 [Olwen]: *is still waving around the JD, grinning wildly*
2011-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a fine Juris Doctor you have there.
2011-11-22 [Nekko fox]: (Juris Doctor®©™℗ and patent pending)
2011-11-23 [Nuada]: *appears* POST MORE PICTURES!!!! *poof, vanishes*
2011-11-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-11-24 [Avaz]: Wtf man! Over the line, waAayy over the line! >:O
2011-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, the line is at ground level, so... *points at the line on the ceiling*
2011-11-24 [Avaz]: Good point.
2011-11-24 [Nekko fox]: Would you prefer stylized cartoon violence?


  

2011-11-24 [Nuada]: *claps claps* yes yes!!! BAHAHAHA *claps claps*
2011-11-25 [Pillowthief]:   
2011-11-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-11-25 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2011-11-25 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I feel as if the comments have slowed down somewhat.
2011-11-30 [Nekko fox]: YOU'RE A LIAR! A LIAR AND A SCOUNDREL!
2011-11-30 [kians mummy]: They have
2011-11-30 [Nekko fox]: No one asked you Jesus.
2011-11-30 Jesus: When the fuck did I say anything?


Also, try out my new religion, coming this Sunday to a gospel-preaching God-hut near you!


Christacize! It's religion, aerobics, and eugenics all in one bundle!


2011-11-30 Hitler: I support this!
2011-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I dunno, Hitler. You've steered me wrong before. That Easy Bake Jew Oven™ wasn't such a hot product. And your Ethnic Cleansing Vacuum™ really sucked.
2011-11-30 [Nekko fox]: His Juden-B-Gone hairdryer really blows too.
2011-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Plus, I wasn't able to concentrate at your camp as advertised, so that was a waste of a weekend. And I can see why your Hitler brand eyeglasses failed. You didn't even wear glasses! And I ended up being blinded by ambition! And don't even get me started on your Hairy Juden and the Gas Chamber of Secrets novel either.
2011-11-30 [Nekko fox]: I don't know, the Gas Chamber of Secrets left me breathless, and the first Hairy Juden took the world by financial storm.
2011-12-01 Hitler:
  

2011-12-01 [Nekko fox]: LIAR! I was there! You said you wanted a glass of gas Jew juice.




Fresh squeezed.
2011-12-01 Hitler:
  

2011-12-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-02 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-12-02 [Avaz]: I love this last one. :D
2011-12-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-03 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-12-03 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-03 [Pillowthief]:
  



There are some things that, once seen, cannot be unseen.
2011-12-03 Hitler: But, Edward! I thought you were MY secret gay lover! *sob*


  

2011-12-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I agree with the sentiment expressed in that picture.
2011-12-04 [Pillowthief]: Communist.
2011-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: I disagree with that sentiment, because it was not in image form.
2011-12-05 [Avaz]:   
2011-12-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-05 [kians mummy]:     
  



X factor finalists doing what they do best, the chicken dance.
2011-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *raises hand to make a point*


*decides to take a flaming shot of bleach instead*... *still being alive, Mort shoots himself repeatedly in the face with a nail gun*...
2011-12-05 [Nekko fox]: I guess you could say that Mort...




*Puts sunglasses on*


Just shot himself in the face repeatedly with a nailgun.








YYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!
2011-12-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: DAMMIT, BILLY, MOVE YOUR HEAD. I'M TRYING TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS TO POLONIUS. He got behind the curtain and then what? THEN WHAT?! Oh God, I hope everything works out for him in the end... he's such a nice guy...
2011-12-05 [Nekko fox]: Fact: William Shakespeare did not exist. His plays were masterminded in 1589 by Francis Bacon, who used a Ouija board to enslave play-writing ghosts.
2011-12-06 Hitler: For a little while, at least until Rasputin traveled back in time! That cold hearted son of a bitch
2011-12-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-06 [Nekko fox]: *cleans up eye-juices and soot*




Sorry, someone was passing around nude pictures Pillowthief...
2011-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *announcer speaks up*


"Buy Bob's Brand Contact Lenses! They're mind-blowingly good!"
2011-12-07 [Lord Josmar]: That short film is epically bizarre.


http://youtu.be/6QFwo57WKwg
2011-12-07 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-12-07 [Nekko fox]: You don't say!






  

2011-12-07 [Pillowthief]: Yes. I DID say.




  

2011-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: That's the same look Misty gives when I come into work every morning! *points at the skeleton in the middle of the floor, giving no look whatsoever*
2011-12-07 [Avaz]: Are you talking about the furry? Or the dog?
2011-12-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Either way, it's "a skeleton in the middle of the floor giving no look whatsoever"
2011-12-07 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-12-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-07 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-07 [Nekko fox]: And as an afterthought, we're running out of blue people.


  

2011-12-07 Gargamel: Not unless we get them first! Gold, Azrael, gold!! We'll be rich!




  

2011-12-07 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-12-07 [Nekko fox]:
   At first I was like


  





   And this is how I ended up
2011-12-07 [Pillowthief]: http://www.eddsworld.co.uk/amywins/toons/shorty.html
2011-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: That happened to me once, except it wasn't a computer, but a vagina, and instead of jumping into it, I had sexual intercourse with it, except that it wasn't a vagina and I didn't have sex with it. What I'm trying to say here is that table three is out of salt. *goes back to scrubbing table seven with a plunger, much to the occupants' disgust and my own delight*
2011-12-09 [Pillowthief]:
  

2011-12-09 Stephen: Salt!
2011-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Too soon, man.
2011-12-09 [Stephen]: Salt. <3
2011-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: TOO SOON.
2011-12-09 [Stephen]: SALT! <3   




(On a different note, that "Dye "Fantasy"" video is really weird. o_O)
2011-12-09 Lot: *Sob*
2011-12-09 [Nekko fox]:
TOO FUCKING SOON






*The actors stop their rehearsal as the lead hangs his head in shame, having entered and stated his line much too early, the seventh time this has happened today*
2011-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Cut! Take five!


*the actors all take out their knives, cut Misty, and take five dollars a piece from her wallet, before returning to the set to completely butcher the scene again*


Let's try this again! Scene four, act seven! *the actors all start dancing around in unison and singing a peppy song about high school, despite this play being about King Lear*


I swear to God, you guys. After rehearsal. In the parking lot. Every one of you. MASS MURDER.
2011-12-11 [Nekko fox]: *Several Evangelists walk in*


Who is murdering our mass?
2011-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *Several Evangelions walk in*


*they start battling Angels and destroy Tokyo-3*
2011-12-11 [Imperator]: *Godzilla is pissed because she just moved her assets out of a Fukushima bank to a Tokyo bank - which has now been destroyed - so she goes on a rampage and all that.*
2011-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mothra, upset and confused by the bright lights of modern day Tokyo, flies into a power plant and is electrocuted to death*... *the Japanese people, having the foresight to purchase giant monster insurance, casually go about their day*...
2011-12-11 [Imperator]: *A thunder of Moths that worship Ra flutter about the bright lights eating the casual Japanese but the insurance industry isn't concerned because no one thought to purchase "somewhat smaller giant monster insurance." The survivors are people with FourSightTM glasses who can see the Moths and hide in time.*
2011-12-11 [Pillowthief]: *The chipacabra goes about it's business, eating plants, as it's a healthy alternative to people*
2011-12-11 [Avaz]: *The chupacabra sees its cousin, the chipacabra (which is apparently a creature made of chocolate chips), going about its business, and decides to leave it be.*
2011-12-11 [Nekko fox]: *Several cryptozoologists see the chupacabra and decide it is in the best interest of the scientific community if the bake the chipicabra into cookies as a lure to catch the chupacabra. Big Foot assists with the initial stages of planning while the Jersey Devil sketches out blueprints for a Scooby-Doo-esque cage trap*
2011-12-11 [Imperator]: *Mountain climbers hear about the trap and donate a lightly used Yeti caught somewhere on K2, however the Yeti forgot its baggie of K2 at home and asks for a leave of absence to retrieve it*
2011-12-12 [Pillowthief]: *Popo and Nana both use their Ice-Climbing skills to reach the K2 bar before the yeti, which they then use as blackmail. All part of Wario's reach for international power*
2011-12-12 [Nekko fox]: *Waluigi tries to get in on the shenanigans but is repeatedly rejected because, seriously, Waluigi is a loser. He's like that crippled retarded, deaf and blind kid that got to be raped and that was his Crimbo present, except nobody wants to pick him so he gets put in time-out instead of someone pitying him and making them be on someone's team*
2011-12-12 [Imperator]: *Then in a media scandal it is revealed that Dr. Mario was Waluigi's rapist, forcing Dr. Mario to seriously reconsider his candidacy for President after consulting with his wife, Toad*
2011-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: So many asterisks.
2011-12-13 [Pillowthief]: So many astrobits.
2011-12-13 [Nekko fox]: So many gastroliths.
2011-12-13 [Pillowthief]: But only one walrus.
2011-12-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: i can haz?
2011-12-13 [Avaz]: Goo goo gachoo!
2011-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, John! *slaps Ringo*
2011-12-13 [Avaz]: *Ringo's beard comes to life and strangles John*
2011-12-13 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *John's life comes to life and strangles Ringo's beard*
2011-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *Paul grows Wings and flies solo*
2011-12-14 [Pillowthief]: *Pablo come back to life, finds a shotgun and ends all of them: John, Ringo, Ringo's beard, Paul, Paul's wings, and George. Paul laughs before he is ended, because he is immortal and he had already ended the other three, years ago*
2011-12-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *John's life somehow escapes the slaughter and chuckles as it slinks towards the back door*
2011-12-14 [Pillowthief]: *Carl Marx mistakes John for someone else and shoots him in the back! Communism regains control of its sad desolate countries*
2011-12-14 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Land and bread for everybody!
2011-12-14 [Pillowthief]: I wonder, why does the person who scored the lowest (even lower than Hedda!) on the poll 'Who would make the best manager of Bob's Diner', own Bob's Diner?
2011-12-14 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Slept with the judges probably
2011-12-14 [Pillowthief]: That's disgusting.
2011-12-14 [Tekkon KinKreet]: tactically sound in my opinion
2011-12-14 [Avaz]: *Groucho Marx walks up to Carl Marx and they exchange witty quips*
2011-12-14 [Pillowthief]: *a mime walks into the room, then freezes. He carefully, yet silently, backs away back out the door. No one thought it was funny, but the mime realizes how close to death he was and therefor doesnt care*
2011-12-14 [Nekko fox]: Do not mock your god!
2011-12-14 God: Yeah, bitches don't know about my management training!
2011-12-14 Jesus: Dad, shut the fuck up.
2011-12-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: Holy Crap, this place is like a ghost town... No comments since December the 14th?! Tsk tsk.
2011-12-17 [Avaz]: *Tsk Tsk walks in, rubs his Fu Man Chu mustache* Yes, this is dire indeed. :(
2011-12-18 [Nekko fox]: I'm gone three days and you two have completely wrecked the place.
2011-12-18 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: HoW cAn YoU tElL?
2011-12-19 [Nekko fox]: Magic and clairvoyance.
2011-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I may have to resort to emergency spamming techniques to get new commenters for conversation fodder, but Elftown's higher ups may not like it too much.
2011-12-19 [Nekko fox]: You need to start scamming some schmucks like Crimson Angel to join in and start commenting.
2011-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Then Operation Foxtrot Uniform Charlie Kilo Young Ocean Union is a go.
2011-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: (unrelated: )
2011-12-20 [Nekko fox]:
 ／l、
（ﾟ､ ｡ ７
 l、 ~ヽ
 じしf_,)ノ


Because I can.
2011-12-20 [Nioniel]: Aww! It's cute!
2011-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Your FACE is cute.
2011-12-20 [Nioniel]: :D
2011-12-20 [Pillowthief]: Not that face. That one's dumb looking.
2011-12-20 [Nioniel]: :O
2011-12-20 [Avaz]: I disagree.
2011-12-20 [Nioniel]: ^^
2011-12-20 [Pillowthief]: Stop that.
2011-12-20 [Nioniel]: :P
2011-12-20 [Avaz]: ^_~;
2011-12-20 [Pillowthief]: I mean it.
2011-12-20 [Avaz]: Sorry. :(
2011-12-20 [Nioniel]: Me too. :(
 :/
>_<
o.o
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: You're liars.
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: No they aren't. They told me so themselves!
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: We're currently at an average of 6.963...etc. comments a day. This is most likely because of MISTY'S FACE. *points at a tub of butter*
2011-12-21 [Ashoka Virlym]: *opens the door* The Fun Has Arrived!
2011-12-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *points to a banned sign that states fun is banned*
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: I thought I banned the shit out of signs!


*throws the signs, butter, Misty's lard-splattered blubber, and Tekkon into the road next to Fun*
2011-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Shut up, Misty/Amoeba/Crimson Anal! *slaps Nekko's shin*
2011-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: It was Amebara.
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I'm pretty sure it was "Amormonbra".
2011-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: You can't make me mad, I'm in love with an awesome guy who loves me.   
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Is it a bear? I'll bet it's a bear. He only loves you for the honey in your pocket, y'know.
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Are you certain? I think bears can sense danger, and I'm almost certain Amormonbrameoba would just consume him.


Perhaps whilst he is attempting to gather the honey, she would bite off his head and that is the only way she can copulate. Much like praying mantises.
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: You know...except much fatter.
2011-12-21 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, it's not a bear.
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Damn religious mantises. They need to keep that nonsense out of schools. *kicks over a shoebox/mantis kindergarten*... *enraged, they start spitting mantis acid all over Amormonbramoebarista, which is something mantises totally do when their schools are threatened*...
2011-12-21 [shadow frost wolf]: o.o
2011-12-21 [Avaz]: *draws a squiggly mustache and blacked out teeth on the o.o above*
2011-12-21 [Pillowthief]: I would like to just impose- thank you to everyone who voted for me, I will try to be best Bob's Diner Manager, ever! Now, SHUT YOUR PIE HOLES and EAT! AND STOP MAKING THOSE DAMN STUPID DUMB FACES!
2011-12-21 Jesus: Did anyone else besides me notice that Misty1 is dating a nazi?


Hmm? Oh, I guess everyone else knew. Guess Im just slow on these things.
2011-12-21 [Avaz]: What dumb faces? O_o;
>_>
2011-12-21 [Jace Beleren]: O_O...you people are weird
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Quit judging us by our actions and start judging us by our social standing and monetary values!


*Lights a cigar with a burning orphan*
2011-12-21 [Avaz]: Hey, hey hey! >:|


...Don't bogart that orphan.
2011-12-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *pours battery acid on the burning orphan* hey! thats a fire hazard!
2011-12-21 [Jace Beleren]: Nekko-chan i know you from Fake so i know that your...i wouldnt say insane but close to it.As for the rest of you...meh
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: I am not insane.


The Bogardt-esque people demand I be titled "Psychologically Disconnected".


*Burns another orphan so he can light his orphan to light his cigar, as his first orphan has inexplicably melted*
2011-12-21 [Avaz]: I wonder, are these the same orphan Pedros from before?
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: The rest of us are insane. But not in a funny way or anything. Pillowthief likes to burn things. *some witty retorts about your mother are said* BURN!


As for myself, I have this irrational fear that I'm actually just being controlled by a guy on the internet and everything I do is contained between asterisks and I have no free will and I can't say anything that hasn't already been typed by him... *glances around nervously*... nah... that can't be true... but if there was a person controlling me, which there is NOT (and I should NOT look into it any further) I'll bet he's incredibly handsome... *slaps himself in the face*
2011-12-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: mort... the matrix has you
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: I think Matrix is French for Religion.


True story


*Continues slapping Mort in the face whilst disguising himself as Mort*
2011-12-21 [Tekkon KinKreet]: LIES! what were we talking about? *dumps wet cement on flaming orphan*
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Hey, we need that cement for building superficial monuments to the glory and prestige of corporate entities!
2011-12-21 [Jace Beleren]: No Nekko religion is french for religion.
2011-12-21 [kians mummy]: Damn I'm hot
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: I know Sammie. We all know.


You've been on fire for twenty minutes now.


*Indicates the charring flesh and dripping deposits of fat*


Damn it all, where are all the Paedro workers I ordered? This is getting messy.
2011-12-21 Nigger Jim: 'ey Massah! I has me some Paedro he'ah, sah! Won'ta massah please sign fo' dem? I'sa gots ta get backs to my hovel to make me some fried chickens.
2011-12-21 [Jace Beleren]: Your still useing Pedro´s?dude switch to Jesus´es theyr much better
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: *Groans* Fine.




*Starts doodling on the pad and tosses it back to the obviously well-educated African American who was only doing this job to support his family during these hard economic times*


*Opens the box*


God damn it! They sent me Peadros, not Paedros! Stop that porch monkey!


*several porch monkeys who were busy enjoying a quiet meal bolt for the door*
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Stop that door!


*The door is now a bolt*


Well, shit, that's another expense. This is coming out of someone's paycheck, once we start paying our employees.
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Dang it, Jim! You're making all the other fine, upstanding black folks look bad! *points at the welfare office, where many black people are lounging about, eating fried chicken and watermelon and washing it all down with grape Kool-Aid*... *a gun fight breaks out for no particular reason, killing many porch monkeys, two porch gorillas, and a porch lemur*...
2011-12-21 [Jace Beleren]: wich is when?Never?Or when hell freezes over?I keep telling you switch to using Jesus
2011-12-21 Jesus: What the fuck is a swith, and why do you keep tell people to swith to using me?


Is that a perverted joke?


IS THAT IT?!


JACE, YOU'RE CONDEMNED TO HELL.




that's what you get.
2011-12-21 [Koho Ai]: Stab, dice, splice, cut, slash, scratch, and so many ways to handle this situation. *looks at the road kill and smiles* I think I'll just burn for a change.
2011-12-21 [Jace Beleren]: I´m already in hell ya cand condemn me to go to somewere i´m already at so your argument is invalid.Good day sir*puts on my tall ht and cape*
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: *Takes Jace's cape and hat and throws them onto the burning Sammie, where it is consumed by licking flames*


You, sir, are no gentleman. You're grammar is similar to Nigger jim's in quality, but at least that fine, upstanding citizen is supporting his family!


*Points imperiously at Nigger Jim who is trading his children for crack and his wife for more crack*
2011-12-21 [kians mummy]: I'm leaving [Bob's diner, its a load of useless crap, bye
2011-12-21 [hanhepi]: you just figured out that Bob's is a useless load of crap? i'm pretty sure that was the diner's motto for a while. or maybe it was just the Blue Plate Special on Tuesdays.
2011-12-21 [kians mummy]: I'm leaving [Bob's diner, its a load of useless crap, bye
2011-12-21 [hanhepi]: damn, that must be my 4th or 5th comment here for the year... i'm really contributing to the economy. you're welcome Mort. :)
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I never did much care for [Bob's diner. Their unne[cessary use] of[ brackets really pisses me] off!


Also, it tends to make things pink.
2011-12-21 Hitler: Hurray!
2011-12-21 [hanhepi]: maybe she was trying for ' :[ ' but the colon ran away? my colon tries to run away every time i order food here.
2011-12-21 Hitler: That was bad comment timing.
2011-12-21 [American Revolutionary]: omg hitlers here!!! *huggles hitler as if he was a plushie* mien kommandant!! how ive missed you *gives hitler a wet kiss on the cheek and squeals like a schoolgirl* i kissed hitler and i liked it
2011-12-21 [Koho Ai]: Come in get it burnt Roadkill on the house *is looking at the miniature house now covered in road kill*
2011-12-21 [American Revolutionary]: *keeps huggling hitler until his mustasche falls off*
2011-12-21 [Avaz]: *hitler's mustache falls off and Michael Jordan picks it up and puts it on*
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rf2xEjWzveA



Like seriously.
2011-12-21 [Nekko fox]: Every time I glance up and see Sammie's message I think to myself


"You can never truly leave Bob's Diner..."




And then haunting music plays in my mind.




Then there is a ninja fight scene and it's in 3-D.
2011-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Why does my ninja fight scene always turn into a gay porno?


HEY, STOP THAT. STOP CROSSING NINJA SWORDS.
2011-12-21 [Master Sifu]: PIRATES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Incoming.
2011-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: NO! STOP PLUNDERING HIS BOOTY! IN 3-D!
2011-12-22 [Koho Ai]: *looks at Penguin then looks at the Ninja getting his booty plundered then back at Penguin* Is it just me are is there a resemblance between you two.
2011-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: It's just you. *sips tea through his ninja hood*
2011-12-22 [Koho Ai]: *holds out the miniature house with burnt roadkill on it* It goes great with tea
2011-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't like tea though. *continues sipping tea*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hello and good day to you. *sips my homemade ice tea*
2011-12-22 [Koho Ai]: Fine then *goes over into a corner and begins to think to much*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pokes Evol*
2011-12-22 Hitler: *Is seriously rethinking his whole "gas the Jews" thing. Should have gone with "Kill just you guys"*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *pokes Hitler with a wet candy cane*
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: Hey now, I don't think Hitler appreciates being-
2011-12-22 Hitler:
QUIT POKING ME YOU BEACHED WRECKAGE OF A HUMAN BEING!
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: -poked....
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sneezes* Oh dear I think I'm allergic to Hitler.
2011-12-22 [Ashoka Virlym]: *smirks*
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: And I think he's allergic to tallow.
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: Hey! Quit breaking out in a rash next to Crimsobarmormeoba!


*Hitler is too busy breaking out in a rash to notice*
2011-12-22 [Ashoka Virlym]: ^^heh
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: *Drags Hitler into the street before he starts spewing pus. Outside, the sound of swearing and the sounds of hitting things soft and meat-filled indicates he was too late*
2011-12-22 [Ashoka Virlym]: Um okay?
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: *Comes back into the Diner dripping with an odd, opaque liquid*


I'm taking a shower.


*Douses himself in Bob's Guaranteed Gasoline and sets himself ablaze in a mighty conflagration of fire and flame. It's pretty fucking awesome*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Alrighty then have fun with your shower.
2011-12-22 [Sheamus Finn]: New for Christmas!! Pus Spewing Hitler Dolls, complete with orders for the holocaust! From the company that brought you Kamakaziee Zero fighter plane.
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Interesting! How much for the doll?
2011-12-22 [Sheamus Finn]: $37,950....limited run....
2011-12-22 [Nekko fox]: *Speaking through the blaze*


All pre-orders are treated with CO2 gas!


Unless you eat it of course.
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Hmmmmmm. Maybe I'll buy one light it on fire with gasoline and throw it through the window of John's house.
2011-12-22 [Sheamus Finn]: half price if John is jewish.
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: He's Puerto Rican
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: i wuffle me some...omg hitler your mustache!!!!
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: HI JASPER! *glomps*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: *staggers back* jasper? who is this...jasper you speak of? i am leutnant friedrich von schroeder, the highest ranking nazi general in all of germany!!
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh, Well then nice to meet you Lieutenant. *smiles and bows*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: *smiles gently and nods* pleasures all mine miss? ah....i seem to not have your name
2011-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: ...


*takes a shot of bleach*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Misty is my name.
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: misty eh? well misty, may i have a dance with you?
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Of course. *smiles*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: *pulls misty close,the lights glittering off my badges
2011-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort slowly loads his revolver*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: you know, its not all thaat bad in germany, im sure bonhoffer wouldnt mind if you came with me
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Really? *smiles and wraps my arms around your neck*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: im fairly certain
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sounds divine. *smiles*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: *nods,smiling*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles and dances with you*
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: *the radio plays "forever yours"*
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles* What a beautiful song.
2011-12-22 [American Revolutionary]: *smiles* yes
2011-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: So do you want to be mine forever, I'll be forever yours.
2011-12-22 Jesus: *pukes, but think better of it and pukes x2*
2011-12-22 Hitler:
WHICH IS TWICE AS AWESOME AS X1!
2011-12-22 [Pillowthief]: You said it Hitler. *high fives the vegan*
2011-12-22 [gone123]: know why hitler offed himself? He finally got the gas bill
2011-12-22 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *comic drumroll sounds, comically*
2011-12-22 [Avaz]:
But only half as awesome as x4, Hitler.
2011-12-22 [Koho Ai]: *vomits all over the corner then turns around holding the bloody remains of an unknown individual* I didn't do it.
2011-12-23 [Nekko fox]:
TOO MUCH YELLING.
2011-12-23 [Avaz]:
NOT ENOUGH YELLING! >:O
2011-12-23 [Nioniel]:
Faces!
:)
:D
^^
2011-12-23 [Nekko fox]:
NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER NIGGER
2011-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: You're just jealous.   
2011-12-23 [Nekko fox]: *A bunch of dyslexic gingers look up*
2011-12-23 Hitler: I hate you all.
2011-12-23 Hitler: I think I might just pour kerosene all over myself, set myself on fir and roll into a ditch. Yeah, that sounds like fun.
2011-12-23 [Nekko fox]: *Hands Hitler the can of Bob's Guaranteed Gasoline*
2011-12-23 [Drack is now ENIGMA]: The hell?
2011-12-23 [Nekko fox]: *Throws Drack to the Unholy Order of Dyslexic Gingers where he is messily devoured*


*The rest of the diner resumes attempting to eat whatever the kitchen produced today*
2011-12-23 [Koho Ai]: *walks away from the corner then walks back to grab the arm that was left behind* Dinner????
2011-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: Do you need salt Evol?
2011-12-24 [Koho Ai]: *scowls and holds the arm close* Its my precious *steals the salt off the table and runs back to the corner quickly* Its all our precious
2011-12-24 [Nekko fox]: MORT! Table Five is inexplicably out of salt. And where are all those AIDS-ridden limbs that came off of Drack? The gingers are getting sick. I need to sweep them up and put them in the compost bin.


*He indicates the soup pot which says "Inexplicable Salt"*


Oh, my bad.


*Indicates another soup pot which reads "Compost Bin". The Peadros are bathing in it*
2011-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Interesting.
2011-12-24 [Koho Ai]: *looks around with a blood crazed smile* I shall eat your hearts with a side of fries
2011-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: Good luck, my heart is hidden very well.
2011-12-24 Hitler: [Insert fat joke here]
2011-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: No, I took it out of my chest and hid it.
2011-12-24 [American Revolutionary]: *sits in a corner sobbing*
2011-12-24 [Pillowthief]: Somehow, I still haven't found a suitable comment for that yet.
2011-12-24 [Nekko fox]: You never will Pillow.


And besides, even if she yanked the heart from the many, many folds of her chest (and it was her own heart and not another's), I'm still sure we could find it. All we would have to do is listen to the straining whimper of cholesterol-choked arteries and it will lead us right to it.
2011-12-24 Hitler: I still cant believe she walked straight into that one though. Its almost like she wants us to make fun of her. Else why would she be back on Bob's?
2011-12-24 [Ashoka Virlym]: oO?
2011-12-25 [Honeythorn]: *Chews suspisciously*
2011-12-25 [Avaz]: *Suspiciously cries out in pain at being chewed on* Suspiciously is the name of that fellow.
2011-12-25 [Koho Ai]: *tilts head and sniffs the air* I know where your hiding it *goes to retrieve your heart*
2011-12-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2011-12-30 [~Crimson Angel~]: You sure? I have many decoys.
2011-12-30 [Nekko fox]: *Points at the pile of decoys, all looking like gigantic bloated ducks with cheeseburgers duct-taped to them, the product of a disease, fat-filled mind*


We know.
2011-12-30 [American Revolutionary]: *sits in the corner* at least shes creative
2011-12-30 [Koho Ai]: *comes back carrying your heart in a plastic bag* If you want your heart back you must pay.
2011-12-30 [Nekko fox]: *Indicates the clogged-looking organ in Evol's hand*


I think people will charge you to take it off your hands.
2011-12-31 Hitler: But, why?
2011-12-31 Hitler: And how.
2011-12-31 Hitler: No, dont answer that. Its rhetorical.
2011-12-31 [Nekko fox]: YOU'RE RHETORICAL!
2011-12-31 [Koho Ai]: *puts on a gas mask and opens the bag unleashing the almighty heart of doom*
2011-12-31 Hitler: *TAUNT IS SUCCESSFUL! BLOCK! COUNTER INSULT!* YOUR FACE IS RHETORICAL!
2011-12-31 [Avaz]: C-C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!
2012-01-01 [Nekko fox]: *COUNTER ACKNOWLEDGED AND DISREGARDED! BLOCK! RETURN FIRE!*


I am rubber, you are glue!
2012-01-01 Hitler: *DODGE WEAK RUBBERY INSULT THRUST! INSINUATE SEXUAL IMPOTENCE!* Thats what your mother was telling me about you, the night before last. I was busy last night... Talking to your sister.
2012-01-01 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's not my heart. *sits next to Castiel*
2012-01-01 [Nekko fox]: * RIPOSTE COUNTER, CITING INACCURACIES AND MISDEEDS*


Yeah, well while you're chasing after old ladies and the mentally infirm, I was at your house carving my name into your bedroom wall while she was giving oral to your family pet.
2012-01-01 [Nekko fox]: *POINTS EMPIRICALLY AT Crimson*


And who let Shamu the Wonder Whale sit at the table?
2012-01-01 Hitler: *PARRY COUNTER- INITIATE GUILT! 2X TARGETS INSULT BONUS!*


My mother is dead. Thanks. She died in a gutter covered in petrol, set on fire. You must have been at Misty1's?
2012-01-01 [Nekko fox]: *COUNTER THRUST WITH NO SOUL TO FEEL GUILT*


Ha, necromancy has it's applications in the world. Too bad by necromancy I mean I dragged her fetid corpse out of the hole, strung her up with wire like a puppet and made her commit grievous sins against humanity in your name.


Also, Misty1 doesn't live in something as civilized as a house. I'm pretty sure she's somewhere between 'cave' and 'hovel' right now.
2012-01-01 Hitler: *RIPOSTE COUNTER, INITIATE CONFUSION!*


Then who's house did you carve your name into?
2012-01-02 [Nekko fox]: *CONFUSION AVOIDED, TARGET MAINTAINED*


It was Pillowthief's, while he was over at Mort's place doing the five-knuckle shuffle.
2012-01-02 Hitler: *LACK OF COMMENT RESPONSE- ADVANTAGE! 2X ATTACK BONUS! INSULT GEOGRAPHY INEPTNESS!*


You knew Im homeless, right? Yeah, destruction of the Reich can do that. I live here at Bob's now, over in the corner. *points at random corner* The only bedroom here is... Mort's... Besides the kitchen, but that's Pablo5000's (He's better than ever!).
2012-01-02 Hitler: *LACK OF COMMENT ADVANTAGE NEGATED! :( *
2012-01-02 [Pillowthief]: Wait, why is there 'Nekko fox' carved into the wall of my bedroom?! What the hell did I miss?




Mom?


DAMN YOU NEKKO! YOUR SHENANIGANS MUST END!!
2012-01-02 [Nekko fox]: LIES! MY SHENANIGANS MUST NEVER END! IT HAS BEEN PROPHESIED THAT THERE WILL BE A REIGN OF SHENANIGANS OVERSHADOWING THE THIRD REICH BY TWO WHOLE YEARS!
2012-01-02 [Avaz]: Captain O'Hagan: "I swear to God I'm going to pistol whip the next guy who says, 'Shenanigans.' "
Mac: "Hey Farva, what's the name of that restaurant you like with all the goofy shit on the walls and the mozzarella sticks?"
Farva: "You mean Shenanigans?"
2012-01-02 [Nekko fox]: Ooooooooh
2012-01-02 [Sheamus Finn]: Team RAM-ROD lives!!!!!
2012-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's knuckles do the shuffle*


Ouch.


*Mort slowly wraps his knuckles in duct tape to avoid this in the future*
2012-01-03 Hitler: Look to the right. *You see Hitler!*


Look to the left. *You see an old lady?*


Look to the right. *You dont see anything!*


*Hitler snaps [@45072]'s neck* *KANSAS CITY SHUFFLE BONUS! HITLER WINS THE DUEL!*
2012-01-04 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko attempts to look up from his newspaper declaring Hitler being dead, but it only wobbles ineffectually. Despite this, he indicates a door with a sign that says "beware of leopard" of it*


Yeah, just dump the Paedros in the back.
2012-01-04 [Nekko fox]: *tacks newspaper to the wall*


  



2012-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort bursts out of the bathroom, pausing to wipe his dripping hands on the expensive piece of history, completely ruining the paper and erasing Hitler's death in reality somehow (probably due in part to the magical urine on his hands, which he had just acquired moments before, while punching a unicorn in the bladder)*


Yeah, Paedros go around back.


*faint goosestepping can be heard in the distance*
2012-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: GODDAMN GEESE. *throws a shoe into a confused group of owls, who have taken up residence in the oven*
2012-01-04 [Araglas]: There was a time when I once used that oven...but no more..no more...
2012-01-04 Hitler: STOP WITH YOUR INSINUATIONS! I have never used that oven to bake delicious pies, I mean Jews, and resent your arrogant roosting in my name brand pie maker, I mean oven.
2012-01-04 [Nekko fox]: Hey, blame the flamingos.


*Indicates the owls that the Paedros are actively painting pink and gluing to stilts*
2012-01-05 Hitler: Fucking flamingos.
2012-01-05 [Nekko fox]: Well, for what it's worth the Mudkips believe in you, Hitler.




  

2012-01-05 [American Revolutionary]: *is totally confused*
2012-01-05 [Avaz]: You are in the correct state of mind to wander these hallowed halls, [American Revolutionary].
2012-01-05 [American Revolutionary]: *bumbles on about howthe reich willrise again*
2012-01-05 [Nekko fox]: The fifth Reich will surpass those of the past and last SEVENTEEN years!
2012-01-05 [Sinful Valentine666]: hewwo
2012-01-06 Hitler:
  

2012-01-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Hitler, you shaved your mustache! Now what are people supposed to draw on pictures of other people to make them look like Hitler? Also, stop squinting. It makes you look Asian.
2012-01-06 [Araglas]: .....I want pie..q
2012-01-06 [Olwen]: I laughed so much, milk came out of my nose. I got so disturbed by the milk I sat staring at the wall for a whole 20 seconds.
2012-01-06 [American Revolutionary]: *drops over from nazi overload*
2012-01-07 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Olwen, we don't pay you to stare at walls, we pay you to squirt milk out of your nose and into people's glasses. And since it's such a great job for you, we don't even pay you to do that. Now get to it!
2012-01-08 [Olwen]: *nods* I accept my fate entirely. *proceeds to make people "Milk Squirts"*
2012-01-09 [Nekko fox]: *Several customers get up to leave and are promptly escorted back to their tables by other 'paid' 'staff' doing their 'jobs'*
2012-01-09 [Araglas]: Anybody in the mood for Nazi Zombie Burgers?
2012-01-09 Hitler: No.
2012-01-09 Zombies: Braaaaiiiins.....
2012-01-09 Nazis: No.
2012-01-09 Burger: .....


*It's inanimate, what did you expect it to say?*
2012-01-09 Hitler: Mmph. I dougmph kno. Whut? *licks fingers*
2012-01-09 [Avaz]: Admittedly, at first glance, "Braaaaiiiins...." looked like "Brazilians...." >_>
2012-01-09 [Nekko fox]: Oh, no worries. The zombies are normally surrounded by their Brazilian bikini waxers year-round to make sure the zombies are 'presentable' to buyers.


*Zombies clamor at the basement door*


"Braaains....Brazilians!...Waaaaxxxxx...."


*looks up from his own waxing, then backhands his masseuse for doing the job they aren't paid for*


Damn it Guitano, I said deep lumbar, not French Bikini. Moron...
2012-01-09 [Sheamus Finn]: Nazi Brazilian burgers....all the oppression with a hint of Carnival debauchery.....
2012-01-12 [Duke Devlin]: Hmm... Still my favourite diner. *sips Baileys brought from home*
2012-01-12 [Avaz]: Ripped from today's headlines!
The Economy of Bob's Diner Has Been In Recent Decline! Management is Concerned. Management is Also [Mortified Penguin], and Concerned Has Been Fired!
2012-01-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from from his newspaper and points at Nekko*


Blame him!


*Mort goes back to jackin' it in the children's playpen, while angry parent's shout what I'm going to assume are happy words of encouragement... probably... it would be easier to hear if the fat kid I'm sitting on would stop screaming in my ear. In any case, Mort continues jackin' it. And also he/me/whatever has a newspaper apparently.*
2012-01-13 [American Revolutionary]: *sits in the corner in a soviet cosmonaut suit* you mean this isn the soyuz spacecraft? CHYORT!!! {those of you illertirate in russian that means damn} fucking vodka must been spiked with morts unipoo and magical urine
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]: Nah, the magical urine is on back-order. Now we're just spiking all the drinks with regular urine.


*Pours in several large buckets of murky yellow-ish liquid into the machine labeled 'Liquid Vendor'. It is also the only liquid dispensed from the 'Liquid Vendor'*
2012-01-13 [kians mummy]:   
2012-01-13 [kians mummy]: sammie   likes
2012-01-13 [kians mummy]:   
2012-01-13 [Avaz]: The magical urine will remain on backorder until certain people stop slaughtering the unicorns for burgers.
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]:   



I CAN'T STOP MYSELF
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]:


  



Now in seven different colors. Most of which are brown!
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]: and in other news


  

2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]:


*drags several turkeys, a panda, two manatees, and a Capuchin monkey into the Diner, throws the lot into a grinder, and starts making more Imitation Unicorn Meat (sparkles not included)*
2012-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: MY CAPTAINCRUNCH MONKEY!! *dives into the grinder*
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]: *The grinder starts churning out black, viscous mulch*


Damn it Mort, now what are we going to feed the hostages...I mean, our paying customers.


*a police officer on a megaphone starts making inquiries about the health and mental well-being of the 'customers'. Nekko opens the door and leans out*


THEY'RE EATING! EACHOTHER!


*A voice in the distance shouts "He's clear! Take the shot!" followed by the crack of a sniper rifle. Nekko withdraws back into the diner, a hole punched through his head, one of his eyes now missing*


*He puts on an eyepatch and puts a cork in the exit wound*


Whoo, good thing they didn't hit anything important.


*Starts reading 'The Pirate Gazette'*


Yar, seems Redbeard has declared war on the Vikings for impeding his raids on the East India Company...
2012-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *steps out of the other end of the grinder, casually dusting off his fancy business suit that he crochet himself*


*picks up the latest copy of 'The Pirate Gazelle'*


*a particularly interesting article about the Gazelle Pirates of the Saharan Ocean catches Mort's interest until he realizes that The Pirate Gazelle is no longer in syndication and stopped making new issues over 4,000 years ago*


Oh, balls. IT'S A TRAAAAAAAA- *the magazine slightly explodes*... *no harm is done, because, evidently, magazines don't really have a lot of explosive charge*... -AAAAaaaaaap? *goes back to reading the articles on the unburnt pages*
2012-01-13 [Nekko fox]: *Doesn't look up from his PIrate Gazette*


Yeah, gazelles go in the back.
2012-01-15 [American Revolutionary]: *just watches, murmuring crazy things about the soyuz space project*
2012-01-15 [Nekko fox]: *Gestures with his thumb* Crazed Ruskies go in the back too.
2012-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *Ivan looks up from his vodka and groggily starts walking toward the back*
2012-01-15 [Pillowthief]: И возьмите тот дрянной Spudnik с Вами, Вами дерьмо!


*goes back to eating his gazelle*
2012-01-15 [Avaz]: *Aslan shows up next to [Pillowthief] and roars, "That's my gazelle, comrade!"*
2012-01-15 [Nekko fox]: *Slams his paper on the table*


газелей являются национальным ресурсом дурак!
2012-01-15 [Sheamus Finn]: Easy for you to say.
2012-01-15 [Pillowthief]: But I thought the gazette was the natural resour!- ah, I see where I got confused.


*puts down his gazelle and starts eating the Pirates Gazette*


*Avaz tries taking it, along with the gazelle, claiming something communist about 'it all belonging to the people', but instead gets a fork wound on his hand*


Я вижу то, что Вы делали, друг, но я не люблю принимать участие. Идиот.
2012-01-15 [Avaz]: I didn't try anything. It was Aslan, the lion-God from Narnia.
2012-01-15 God: Stop blame shifting, or I'll tell Loki its ok to start killing/raining sulfur/turning people into salt pillars again.
2012-01-16 [Sheamus Finn]: Easy way to fill the salt shakers.....
2012-01-16 Lot: Get your hands off my wife!!
2012-01-16 [American Revolutionary]: *looks at aslan in horror*
2012-01-16 [Nekko fox]: *Looks at Aslan's whore*
2012-01-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Whores go out by the sink with the rest of the empty containers, where they are washed, dried and placed on a shelf until they needed again
2012-01-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: They are needed. Lol
2012-01-16 [Nekko fox]: Hey, don't you tell me what to do with Famous Shin's mother!
2012-01-18 Lot: Oh. Yeah, thats not my wife. Put her back on the shelf.
2012-01-18 [American Revolutionary]: не что это важно, но если у вас возникли какие-либо идеи, сколько фигня вы носик в считанные секунды, даже Ленин хотел ебать его мать, который был двух бит проститутка и ВИЧ и хлопок
2012-01-18 [Avaz]: That's what she said. :P
2012-01-18 [American Revolutionary]: Вы знаете, Аваз, миры ядерной энергии скрыты в кавернозной мудак morts, он показал мне один раз, и она сожжена покинуть мои брови
2012-01-18 [Avaz]: I'm surprised it was only that. I would have expected a full-blown mutation by now, if anything. Two heads, an arm sticking out of your chest, that sort of thing.
2012-01-19 [Pillowthief]: Mort's a big asshole, not 'has a big asshole'. And I think it would be carnivorous, not 'cavernous'.
2012-01-19 [American Revolutionary]: я был не
t, точно думал, но очень хороший момент, я люблю русский, вы наклоняю сказать?
2012-01-19 [Avaz]: Da, comrade!
2012-01-19 [Nekko fox]: Duh, comrade.
2012-01-19 [Avaz]: Yes, that too.
2012-01-23 [Pillowthief]:
  

2012-01-23 [kians mummy]: Please come and join in ET: awards New
2012-01-23 [Pillowthief]:
  

2012-01-23 [kians mummy]: Mort, what was the logo I used to have in my name but it was a different number. it was like ȵ
2012-01-23 [kians mummy]: Please come and join in ET: awards New
2012-01-23 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: I love comics! ><
2012-01-23 [Nekko fox]: I love seeing Sammie scrabbling for attention on someone else's Diner!
2012-01-23 [American Revolutionary]: это - то, потому что sammie h! является atten шлюхой, - он или - он нет?
2012-01-23 [Nekko fox]: Yeah! What that thing in the breather mask said.


*The cancer patient feebly coughs*
2012-01-24 [kians mummy]: Says the ugly, smack head lookalike 4 eyed geek who looks as gay as Elton john and dresses like a tramp
2012-01-24 Hitler: But... Misty1 didnt say anything...
2012-01-24 [Nekko fox]: Hitler is right Sammie, you really need to get your shit together and pay attention.


Anyone else up for some turkey?


*Starts grinding up live turkeys to make turkey burgers*


*The burgers are not burgers, but really just uncooked turkey meat*


*the starving and half crazed street urchins that live under the tables and violate cripples who can't get away scrabble for the nourishment*






Ah, the circle of life.
2012-01-24 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-01-24 [kians mummy]: I love the way he changes the convo,


Bob's diner is dead
2012-01-24 [kians mummy]:     
2012-01-24 [American Revolutionary]: Вы знаете sammie, если это было ins ко мне, я не брал это тот путь, ха ха
2012-01-24 [Nekko fox]: Who changed the conversation? Was it Mort? He tends to do that. But who are we to judge him and the way he works? He is like one of those cryptids; Big Foot, Nessy, the Jersey Devil, Jesus, and La Chupacabra. Mysterious, elusive, and probably the creation of a fevered LSD trip.
2012-01-24 Jesus: The Jersey Devil is real! I saw him once! You can trust in me!
2012-01-24 [Nekko fox]: I don't know, you're claim is only partially substantiated by the spin-off song The Devil Went Down to Jersey.
2012-01-25 [American Revolutionary]: Вы знаете, я никогда не делал наркотиков день в моей жизни, если бы я сделал, то Вы знали бы *grins в зле way*
2012-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: In Soviet Russia, ass fists you!


But seriously. Prepare your anus. *Mort leads an aroused donkey in to help rid of the Russian infestation*... *the donkey keeps insiting that it is not a donkey, but rather an old lady with bucked teeth, but Mort isn't falling for that one again! Not after last time, dammit!*...
2012-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2012-01-25 [Nekko fox]: Those wacky Japanese. Next thing you know, they'll all grow tentacles and rape the pole, and eachother, with said tentacles.
2012-01-25 [Avaz]: Undoubtedly there will also inexplicably be a Japanese schoolgirl giggling and making the ^_^ face.
2012-01-25 [Avaz]: Naturally, that goes without saying!
2012-01-25 [Nekko fox]: Of course, and nothing was said! Like MAGIC.
2012-01-25 [Avaz]: I'm glad, because otherwise it wouldn't have gone without saying.
2012-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Not nearly enough things would go without saying... *glares at Misty, who is not taking the hint*...
2012-01-26 [Olwen]: That pole was being a bitch though. Did you SEE the eyes it was giving that poor man?
2012-01-26 [Avaz]: It was-a chargin his lazer, but they started beating up on it before it could shoop da whoop.
2012-01-26 [Nekko fox]: Actually, it was charging Malaysia, and that was credit.
2012-01-26 [Avaz]: Oh, my mistake.
2012-01-27 [Olwen]:   
2012-01-27 [Pillowthief]:
  

  

2012-01-28 [Nekko fox]: 
2012-01-28 [Olwen]:   
2012-01-28 [kians mummy]: 
2012-01-28 [kians mummy]: 
2012-01-28 [Nekko fox]:
  







*Enjoys his bottled tears-of-the-damned*
2012-01-29 [American Revolutionary]: no way im a nazi
2012-01-29 Jesus: Actually, I believe you have mistaken Purgatory for Hell. Purgatory is the grey place, between Heaven and Hell, that souls go to to await their judgement. Its very boring. Kinda like Chicago.


Now you know.
2012-01-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-01-29 [Olwen]: I quite like the taste of crunchy murderers and tormented paedophiles... It brings a certain zing to my day.
2012-01-29 [Nekko fox]: I think that 'zing' is actually the menstrual blood of angels.
2012-01-30 [Nekko fox]:
Draw me like one of your French girls...




  

2012-01-30 Jesus: AGHH! MY EYES!
2012-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Thanks a lot. Now I have a raging semi, jerk. How am I supposed to give this eulogy with this massive bulge?! *points at a tumor on his arm*
2012-01-30 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you know damn well you give Epitaphs, not Eulogies. We've been over this.
2012-01-30 [Pillowthief]: And that was just last Tues even. Maybe that semi tumor is more of the "raging full-blown" type than we first suspected. You should get that looked at.
2012-01-30 [Nekko fox]: Naw, that costs money. Mort's trying to encourage the barter system; he trades his tumor for medical assistance.


Think it will work?
2012-01-30 Jesus: Doubtful. No one wants Mort's raging tumor.
2012-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's tumor rages even harder and attacks Jesus*
2012-01-31 Voldemort: INTERCEPTION!
2012-01-31 [Avaz]: It's like a tumor... within a tumor.
2012-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Tumortumor = Fourmor
2012-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Or is it a Former? I dunno, I guess I prefer the former. But would it only apply to a twomor? Who knows. I don't even know where to find two more anyway, they're really hard to come by. Ahahahahahahaahaahahaahaha, shut up, Avaz. Where's my Tequila?


GODAMMIT, WHERE IS MY TEQUILA?! *shatters Tequila bottle over the table and starts slashing some old guy's back*
2012-01-31 [Avaz]: SOMEONE GET THIS MAN HIS GODDAMNNED TEQUIILA! >:O
2012-01-31 [Nekko fox]: *Indicates the man who is being slashed by the broken tequila bottle*


So, did you order potatoes or the curly fries with what could be construed as an entree.


*the man screams in unbearable agony*


Sir, I will not have you speaking such sexually inappropriate things at me in the work place. I'm going to have to ask you to leave.


*The man slumps over unconscious*
2012-02-03 [Pillowthief]: And that solves that. Not really.
2012-02-03 [kians mummy]:   
2012-02-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You make a very convincing argument, Sammie. But what will you do if I vote for you? How can I be sure I'm not voting for another goddamn commie, like [Hedda]?
2012-02-03 [Nekko fox]: I thought he was part of that Nazi Socialist Liberal Agenda party?
2012-02-03 [Susie-Q]: Good lord. Not politics. If you need me ill be in the corner with a nine to my temple :P
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: Your temple? I didn't know we were bringing religion into this conversation. Damn it, POLITICS! You know the rule, church and state cannot be in the same room together, so everyone get out.
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: Lol. Pull the metaphorical trigger and send the spiritul bullet of social retardation deep into my subconcious so i can be so ignorant to reality it doesnt bother me that the world is falling into a state of complete mind f*cking intolerence, hate, and unessecary control. But im happy, how are you? XP
2012-02-04 [American Revolutionary]: lol [Susie-Q] nice
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: Watch it, someone is going to stab you in the hope with their ennui.
2012-02-04 [American Revolutionary]: *cocks head at nekko*
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: Don't you cock anything at me you lech!
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: I aim to please despite the fact that i dont care what you think lol.
2012-02-04 Voldemort: Intercepts again! Would that be counted as REception?
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: That would be a possible maybe.
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: The act of being cepted in return :p
2012-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Stay out of my septum.
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: Havent you seen the movie Inseptum? Im implementing smells into your nose
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: Septum? Damn near killed him!
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: Its alright. I took three weekend classes. Im a professional
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: A professional septum. Got it.
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: Yup. But then they made an ap for that so all my studying went down the tubes
2012-02-04 [Nekko fox]: You should get your tubes tied like the majority of our orphaned street urchins did. You know, to keep their population down.
2012-02-04 [Pillowthief]: Thats what I did.




Worked out for a while, but tying tubes just gets plain tiring to do, and the moneys not that great either.
2012-02-04 [Susie-Q]: No. I donated my tubes to chuck-e-cheeses so little kids can crawl through them at birhday parties
2012-02-05 [Nekko fox]: Oh how thoughtful. Now we just need to figure out what to do with the membranous sacks...
2012-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort becomes aroused at the very mention*
2012-02-05 [Nekko fox]: You like that Mort? Those...Membranous sacks?


2012-02-05 [American Revolutionary]: *throws up the nazi stew he was eating* stew: seig heil!!!
2012-02-06 [Nekko fox]: That's what it said.
2012-02-06 Voldemort: INTERCE- Wait, nevermind. Im not hungry.
2012-02-06 [Nekko fox]: That's what your MOM said!


Because she was on a diet.


Because she let herself go after she had you.


Because it was a stressful time in her life.


Because with work and the kids and post partem depression AND GODDAMN IT I'LL START WORKING OUT WHEN I FEEL LIKE IT!
2012-02-06 Voldemort: Ma'ma?
2012-02-06 [American Revolutionary]: O.O errrrr ok then... woop woop woop tooo the sailor mobile!!! *turns out to be a cardboard box with the cracker jack boy taped to the sides* damn you mort and your cheap shipping
2012-02-10 [Nekko fox]: On that note, I'm going to hold a contest.


The first one to achieve the particular goal can use Mort for a day.
2012-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Here, here!


"Where?"


Here. *points at a spot on the floor* Here.


"Oh, there."


Yeah. Thanks. *tips the delivery guy*


"Thanks, buddy."


*business resumes as usual and nothing funny happens*
2012-02-11 [Avaz]: *Shit is offended that Nothing Funny happened instead*
2012-02-11 [Nekko fox]: Hey, Shit, would you please relax, you're such a downer.




*Shit tried to relax and get over the fact that Nothing Funny happened here*
2012-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *Tensions rise*... *Shit goes down*...
2012-02-11 [Nekko fox]: *The plumber walks in from the back room*


"Alright chief, the clog has been pushed through. I don't even know how you managed to get body parts, seminal fluid, hair, and eighteen pygmies wedges into one pipe, but that explains why the toilet has been backed up for so long."


*Looks up from his Toilet Owner/Operator manual*


Sure, pygmies go in the back.
2012-02-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: こんにちは
2012-02-17 [Avaz]: That's what she said.
2012-02-17 [Nekko fox]: 自分自身をファック行く




See, I can use Google translate too!
2012-02-18 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: ROAR!
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *sits in corner enjoying a glass of resh blood*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sits in Jasper's lap* Hi.
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *jumps a little* hi *grins* please sit..conversate with me *lights a cigarette*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ok, so what's that you're drinking?
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: you dont want to know.. *smiles*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh? Why's that?
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: its blood *grins*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Oh? *takes the glass from you and stares at it's contents*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *cocks my head*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *takes a sip from your glass*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *looks at you utterly shocked*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *licks my lips* Yum!    *hands the glass back to you*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *shakes my head and opens my mouth revealing two fangs* impossible!!!
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grins exposing my fangs* Is it?
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *just about falls out of my seat* you..you are...
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: The same as you?   
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *nods* names sorin, i hail from russia
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm Misty, I hail from Italy. *giggles*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: italy huh? *stands up, dressed like a red army officer*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yes, that a problem good sir?
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: nyet, dah..i mean no..not at all, please sit
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *smiles and sits down*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *Walks in a backhands both of them*


Quiet you smelly Italian whale, and you as well you Red Herring-swilling commy!


*The whale and the communist slink back into the corner*


*Sighs and gestures at them to indicate them to Sorin and Misty*


Dear god, it's a frickin' social-site for love-lorn Forever Alones in here, and they all want to get into the kitchen to steal our special dinner whose recipe will guarantee that Bob's Diner wins the Diner Rally Special Event so that we can earn enough money to pay for Pillow's operation that he needs to get because he was injured playing against a rival diner (known only as Robert's Diner) so he could win the prize that is needed to pay off the accommodations made for Mort's prize-winning horse that was hurt racing, during which race it broke its leg and Turkey lost the money he put into the horse races which he was hoping to double so that he could afford opera lessons for Hedda who was originally meant to sing at the auditions next Tuesday so he could enter the Tri-state sing championship but can't afford the entrance fee and whose prize included a years supply of mayonnaise, napkins and tiny packets of ketchup (ketchup not included).


2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *just looks at nekko* youve lost your mind
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I knew that long ago. *giggles at Nekko*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *rolls over laughing*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *grins* That funny eh?
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *nods*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: My mind isn't lost. I dragged it into the street and put that feral, rabid thing out to pasture with a forty-two.




Haven't looked back since.


*Goes back to reading while machines keep his body functioning with basic needs such as breathing and heart-beats and blinking and public masturbation*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *shudders at the thought of nekko jacking off in public* ughhhh
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ew...   
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: your telling me..makes me wanna go lay down n my grave
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Same here. *shudders*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *Uses the electronic masturbator arm to gesture back towards the kitchen*


Graves are in the back.
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *rips the electronic arm off and shoves it down nekkos throat sideways (not an easy task)* there
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *Me loads the program for the Fap-o-Tronic (patent pending) and loads sequence 'Asian Orgy Bukkake Love Time' as the secondary arm begins locking into place*


*Waits patiently*


  

2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, that's the stuff.


*The chair begins Auto-Repair-Sequence Delta*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: thats it..ive had enough *rips nekkos head off and shoves it up his rectum* see the tv remote?
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *watches with a giggle*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: no wonder everytime you fart the volume goes up
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *giggles*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *kicks him out the door* there thats one less dirtbag around
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Indeed.
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *nods*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *Walks back in, his headless body going about the business. He then picks up the dirtbags and drags them back in. A muffled voice chastises Sorin*


Now now, a noob like you needs to learn how we work at Bob's Diner, Funitarium and Orphanage-Management. The dirt bags go next to table six.
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *shakes her head*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *laughs like a lunatic*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *the muffled voice continues*


Also, my head doesn't go in here. It belongs in the clouds.


*Pulls his head out his ass, and lets it float away*


*The body stands around awkwardly, not knowing what to do now*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *the body, now headless, moves into the kitchen to avoid further awkwardness*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *starts ripping the body of nekko into little tiny bits and throws them into the toilet and flushes them*
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sips on a whine glass full of red liquid*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *then drops a stick of dynamite down the toilet and blows it up*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *the toilet forces the body parts back together. The head returns to its next upon the next and he takes his seat on his chair overlooking the shifting, terrified customers*


Oh, Misty, quit drinking the bloody urine samples Mort left. He needs those to keep his job.
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *Points at Sorin*


You suck at this 'killing' thing. Are you sure you're Ruskie?


Maybe you should practice on some of our street urchins. They've been breeding at an alarming rate, so you'd be doing us all a favor.
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not drinking Mort's bloody urine samples.
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *To prove this point, a small pack of unwanted children drag a screaming elderly woman into the dark recesses of table eight*
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: And yes you are. That's the only red liquid we serve here.
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I brought this from home.
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *All the street urchins lean out and speak in a dead-tone*


"You are home..."


Hey, get back to catching rats so the customers have something to eat!


2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't live here.
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: You keep thinking that hon, but you keep coming back here.
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Only because of Sorin
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: That's what he WANTS you to think.
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: Riiiiight...
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *The FBI watching from their corner nod their heads and shuffle out*
2012-02-18 [American Revolutionary]: *starts strategically taking out the street urchins one by one* urchin number 276: yay im alive!! *gets ripped in half*
2012-02-18 Jesus: Fuck. Just when I thought it might be safe to come back... Satan's still here. Go crash Hitler's party across the street!
2012-02-18 Hitler: That's what I told her, just a couple hours ago. LOL.
2012-02-18 Joseph Stalin: Sorin, I am deeply disappointed in you comrade, you failed to uphold the ideals of beautiful Mother Russia and the great and unstoppable Soviet Empire. I am sorry, but you are hereby labeled as a Capitalist and are scum in the eyes of me and Great Father Lenin.


*Calmly shoots Sorin for being tool of the capitalist nations*
2012-02-18 Vladimir Lenin: *Cries because he had hoped Sorin would make something of himself, only to see Sorin turn out like....this*


Why my child?! Why?! And you're even scrabbling after that bloated whale carcass resulted of an incestuous affair named Misty. Whyyyyy?!
2012-02-18 [~Crimson Angel~]: I'm not a whale you fool, I'm too small to be a whale even baby whales are bigger than I am.
2012-02-18 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses the previous Russian dictators out* Your rubles are no good here!
2012-02-19 Hitler: Comrades! I will take your rubles! And your souls...
2012-02-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort glances up from behind the cash register*


Hey, stop masturbating in public. That is disgusting and we here at Bob's Diner take offense to that fil- *glares under the counter*


Listen, bitch. If you don't stop struggling with the ball gag, I'm going to shove my whole arm in there again. If you want me to stop, just say the safe word, damn it! It's 'czterystaczterdzieściczterymiliardyczterystaczterdzieściczterymilionyczterystaczterdzieściczterytysiąceczterystaczterdziestoczteroletni'.


"Mmph! Mm! Shtp! Shhtp! Ish cztmphhphphmphmmhmhhmpmhhhpmh!!!"


*Mort angrily shoves his entire arm in, spiked bracelet and all*... *muffled screaming ensues*...
2012-02-19 [Nekko fox]: Hey, has anyone seen my gagged prostitute?


*Looks around*


Ah, she's probably lost in Misty's folds again.
2012-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Nope, I stuffed her in the meat grinder.
2012-02-19 [Pillowthief]: Ive figured it out. ET couldnt hold all of Misty1 in one profile, so this must mean there's TWO Misty1s in here! My obvious choice is Sorin, as no one has actually seen its face, besides ripped pictures from Magic: The Gathering and some Russian museum.
2012-02-19 [kians mummy]:   
2012-02-19 [American Revolutionary]: oh thanks pillowthief
2012-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Sorin isn't me, just click on his picture on his house and you'll see pics of him.
2012-02-19 Jesus: Lies. That's just pictures of Misty with her beard shaved off.
2012-02-19 [Nekko fox]: It is a well documented fact that Misty sports a full dwarf beard that regrows itself within two hours after it has been shaved off. It is also well documented that Magic: The gathering, whose cards have delightful artwork, is also for nerds.
2012-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: I don't have a beard, and I never have.
2012-02-19 [Nekko fox]: It is also a well-documented fact that Misty is a notorious and habitual liar. It keeps her sustained when she is unable to find the succulent flesh of infants to feast upon. Mort knows, he saw it first-hand and it traumatized him.
2012-02-19 [American Revolutionary]: *is reading a book* huh? what?
2012-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: They think you're me. *rolls eyes*
2012-02-19 [American Revolutionary]: impossible, i cant be you
2012-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: That's what I said.
2012-02-19 [American Revolutionary]: i am perfectly not misty, and let me warn you pillowthief, your insults towards my girlfriend are un needed and unappreciated, keep your toungue to yourself or be prepared to have it ripped clean out of your mouth and fed to a dog
2012-02-19 [~Crimson Angel~]: Aw, I love you babe! *kisses Sorin*
2012-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: No! NO!! *savagely beats Misty away with a baseball bat*


Don't worry, Sorin. That thing was trying to eat your face, but I got your back, bro.
2012-02-20 [American Revolutionary]: *grabs mort by his throat and chokes him* you mean my girlriend?
2012-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *glares at Mort* You're such an idiot.
2012-02-20 [American Revolutionary]: *growls* i aint afraid of ripping your intestines out and strangling you with them
2012-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yum!
2012-02-20 [American Revolutionary]: *grins*
2012-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: *nuzzles Sorin*
2012-02-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort is now thoroughly aroused and sporting a raging semi*
2012-02-20 [Nekko fox]: *Me, staring at the internet-threats*


  

2012-02-20 [~Crimson Angel~]: Mort that's so gross.
2012-02-20 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko returns Mort's Misty-Ball bat (used for thrashing her countless jowls just as one would while attacking a swarm of bats), drops Pillow back onto his Rapist Ladder (now a Bob's Diner Exclusive) and restarts his own Public Masturbation chair*


Alright, now, what was going on again?


*watches as hundreds of street urchins bum-rush Sorin and devour his knees with the horrid ferocity of hundreds of street urchins hungering for knees*


Damn it, I told you to keep them in check! *rolls his eyes*


*they roll away of their own accord*


Oh Goddamn it all! Oh, their is a penny under Table √17^90°/π.
2012-02-20 [Pillowthief]: Hey! After extensive, exhaustive research, after which I succumbed to devouring a small child from under Table √17^90°/π (who was trying to steal my damn penny, the son of a bitch!) I finally found a picture of Sorin.


  



I almost went with an, "I herd u leik" joke, but it would have been redundant and we all know how much Mudkip-Nazis hate redundancy- ever since that one episode back in July.


(Did I seriously just get threatened to have one of my body parts fed to a dog? That's disgusting! Misty probably wouldnt eat it anyways, but just the insinuation is downright disrespectful!)
2012-02-20 Jesus:
  

2012-02-20 [kians mummy]:
  

2012-02-20 [Nekko fox]:   



I found a picture of the internet itself, it's a pity because many of the cats don't survive the transport between the website and the user via tubes, and that is how we get the majority of our meat on discount.


Also, I found this picture of Misty and her family, attempting to migrate to warmer climates.






  

2012-02-22 [Pillowthief]:   
2012-02-22 [Avaz]: Man, I want some Nutella now. >_>
2012-02-22 [Nekko fox]: Well, Indie stole it from its holy shrine. All he left was a bag of cornmeal and rat feces.
2012-02-22 [Avaz]: Bastard. I hope that boulder trap nails him.
2012-02-23 [Nekko fox]: No, that would be the hammer trap.
2012-02-23 Jesus: Your FACE is a hammer trap.
2012-02-23 [American Revolutionary]: ummmm
2012-02-23 [Nekko fox]: Quiet Sorin! You can change your name as often as you please, but HAMMER JESUS WILL ALWAYS KNOW!
2012-02-23 Jesus: Bitch.
2012-02-23 [Pillowthief]: Seriously. Can you not avoid plagiarism? SOPA, ACTA, and PIPA were made with you in mind. You disrespect and dishonor all hackers and pirates, across the world.
2012-02-23 [Nekko fox]: Yo ho ho and a bootleg disk.


*Hefts a barrel of mead and puts on his viking helmet before climbing into his dirigible made out ninjas*
2012-02-23 [American Revolutionary]: i have the freedom to put my name as whatever i please, its a free country
2012-02-23 [Nekko fox]: Last I'd checked, I never said you couldn't change your name, just that Hammer Jesus will know, because he ALWAYS knows. He is, after all, Hammer Jesus.


Also, B's D isn't a country, nor is it free.


*Whips several several slaves of multi-ethnic backgrounds*
2012-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *violently bursts in through the door and hurls the lion he's grappling with into the sloppy joe machine*... *it screams and shouts curses in Aramaic as it is grinded into a delicious meat sludge*


*casually dusts himself off*


Anyway, so how's the multicultural meeting goi- *notices the whipping*


Oh, my. *starts taking off his pants*
2012-02-23 Hammer Jesus: *points* Bitch.


*Makes awkward hammer-like gestures*
2012-02-23 [Nekko fox]: Mort! Stop! You know damned well lion doesn't go in the sloppy joe machine. Lions are endangered! They belong in the cinnamon crisper.


*Orders the slaves to take off their pants too. Several of them begin to weep*
2012-02-23 [American Revolutionary]: i was talking to pillow thief not you nekko
2012-02-23 [American Revolutionary]:    oh nooooooooo
2012-02-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *hangs his pants out to dry, even though they aren't wet... just in case*


*starts waiting on tables in his underwear, occasionally stopping to thrust in various customers' faces*
2012-02-23 [Nekko fox]: *Several of the customers lean in to the thrusting. skullfucking ensues. Nekko notes it to add an additional surcharge of 89k%*
2012-02-24 [American Revolutionary]: *steps outside to gain some mental sanity after watching mort skullfuck the customers*
2012-02-24 [Nekko fox]: *The 'outside' or 'Obfuscation of Reality Area' as it was originally called by the seven insane chimpanzees who designed it, is the area Sorin stepped in to. There, water happily transforms from a gas to a solid, greeting Sorin as it does. Black reflects light blindingly, while the color white absorbs it, as well as several stains from a spilled bottle of wine that was knocked askew by one of the seven insane chimpanzees. The chimpanzee was named Greg. The passage of time fluctuates erratically going too quickly, or too slowly, with the movements of objects following the speed of time poorly. The air shimmers as it coalesces into the screaming head of Ronald McDonald, whereupon it is almost instantly devoured by a gargantuan Pac-Man head that is singing the national anthem of Switzerland through a mouthful of crackers and Ronald hair. Nekko leans into the room and addresses Sorin, who is now waist-deep in ponchos, sombreros, and Mexican mustaches*


Just a heads up, we charge by the minute in here and you've been gone three years. Or one hundred and twenty minutes. Or you just showed up.


*Reality in the 'Outside' continues to bend and alter itself at a whim, perhaps directed by the diabolical mind of Jim Henson, creator of The Muppets, or maybe the entire staff at Disney. No one knows*
2012-02-24 [American Revolutionary]:    *dives back into the diner, reeking of a flux capacitor backfire* i need one hundred and twenty one jigawats
2012-02-24 [Nekko fox]: And yet, all you get is


  

2012-02-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2012-02-24 [Pillowthief]:
  

2012-02-25 [Nekko fox]:


*stares at Pillow's gif for a second*






  

2012-02-25 [Pillowthief]:
  

2012-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2012-02-25 [Nekko fox]: *Points an accusing finger at Misty's gargantuan, sun-eclipsing bulk*




  



Besides, everyone knows Naruto stole that epic fight scene from Cowboy Bebop.
2012-02-25 Jesus:
  

2012-02-25 Ein: Ah, very good question, Edward Wong Hau Pepelu Tivrusky, the IV. A 'Weaboo' is a derogatory slang word for an annoying Otaku. It was originally conned on 4chan, because well, annoying Otakus just seem to migrate that way. What's an 'Otaku', you ask?


Im not sure. Im just a dog.
2012-02-25 [Pillowthief]: Quiet Ein, you multi-billion double-dollar freak of nature.


Also, I'd like it to be known that every time I visit Bobs Diner, I always like to spend several minutes contemplating on the 'Who Would Make The Best Manager' poll while secretly giggling to myself that there's only one person that voted for Misty1. The only thing sadder would be if she hadn't voted for herself.


Ah, ah- stay that click button Sorin, the joke is already out there and you will only make it worse by adding your own sad vote on as well.
2012-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Votes in that poll translate into percent shares of B's D stock owned. Being that Pillowthief is inexplicably now the majority shareholder, he somehow owns the corporation and therefore is responsible for our massive debt and criminal record.
2012-02-25 [American Revolutionary]: ha ha in your face pillowthief!!!
2012-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *The Fed bursts in and starts beating up Sorin. Ben Bernanke personally sodomizes him with his raging 12-incher*
2012-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: I didn't vote for myself... I voted for [Sagacious Turkey]...
2012-02-25 [Mrs. No_One]: I didn't vote for anyone, I can't vote seeing as how I'm not a memeber of this 'forum'/wiki
2012-02-25 [Nekko fox]: That's because you're not welcome here, Schoolgirl. Now buy our so-called food and service Mort in the mop closet.


also, Pillow is gonna need to wrest control of this Diner from my cold, dead fingers.


*Indicates with his stumps the hands which were surgically removed as a tax write-off*
2012-02-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: ...?
2012-02-26 [Nekko fox]: Hey, we don't need your newfangled ellipse her Misty. That's some of that rich, city-folk punctuation, containing all your god-fearing magic and whatnot!


2012-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Misty's ellipse, having been previously fangled by a new, silently sobs in the corner*
2012-02-26 [Nekko fox]: And that's what you get for coming here from the city!
2012-02-26 [kians mummy]:    Kiss my ass and give it a wobble lol
2012-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: HA HA HA HA HA, OMG THAT'S HILARIOUS. *slowly reaches for a bowl of ramen*
2012-02-26 Hitler: I'd hit that.
2012-02-26 Hitler: With a shovel.
2012-02-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-27 [Nekko fox]: A liberal muslim homosexual ACLU lawyer professor and abortion doctor was teaching a class on Karl Marx.


"Before the class begins, you must get on your knees and worship Marx and accept that he was the most highly-evolved being the world has ever known, even greater than Jesus Christ!"


At this moment, a brave, patriotic, pro-life Navy SEAL champion who had served 1500 tours of duty and understood the necessity of war and fully supported all military decisions made by the United States stood up and held up a rock.


"How old is this rock?"


The arrogant professor smirked quite Jewishly and smugly replied "4.6 billion years, you stupid Christian."


"Wrong. It's been 5,000 years since God created it. If it was 4.6 billion years old and evolution, as you say, is real... then it should be an animal now."


The professor was visibly shaken, and dropped his chalk and copy of Origin of the Species. He stormed out of the room crying those liberal crocodile tears.


The students applaued and all registered Republican that day and accepted Jesus as their lord and savior. An eagle named "Small Government" flew into the room and perched atop the American Flag and shed a tear on the chalk. The pledge of allegiance was read several times, and God himself showed up and enacted a flat tax rate across the country.


The professor lost his tenure and was fired the next day. He died of the gay plague AIDS and was tossed into the lake of fire for all eternity.


Semper Fi.
2012-02-27 [kians mummy]: sbbd
2012-02-27 Jesus: I hate you, Sammie h.
2012-02-27 [Avaz]: Nekko, you should write a book on this subject.
2012-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Finally, a place to get an "I love Sammie h!" banner!
2012-02-27 [Avaz]: You know you've always wanted one, Mort.
2012-02-27 [Nekko fox]: Do they have any that come in "I saw Sammie h being raped by warthogs and she loved it" banners? Because I found this video of her on the internet and I thought it would be only fitting to pass it, and the banner, onto her family. You know, for educational purposes.
2012-02-28 [kians mummy]: [Nekko fox] you got Raped by your Dad.
  

2012-02-28 Hitler the Grammar Nazi: *throws a sophomore level English text book at Sammie h's head*
2012-02-28 [kians mummy]: Ahh, so what
2012-02-28 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Actually Hitler, I think you need a 3rd grade level English text book
2012-02-28 [kians mummy]: lol
2012-02-28 [Avaz]: Indeed. There, they're, their. Learn the difference. :)

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]: *Is not bothered by the attempt at trolling because he's seen worse*


  



And they're right, you know. There is a particular time to use their language like that, but this is not such a time. And besides, the joke is on you Sammie, my father died of explosive recursion before I was born so I couldn't get raped by him. I had to seek out other father figures, so I chose yours. He has a very soft touch, much like a woman's so if I closed my eyes it was like being raped by your father, with his womanly hands. It helped. But you already know that, and I'm just preaching to the choir. The choir of molested children. The molested children that know the difference between their, they're and there, but you already know about them too.


Also,


  

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:
This is now a Spidey thread.






  

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]: As an aside, I love the banner you made in MS Paint. I take it you couldn't spring for Photoshop, but hey, I understand.


  

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   


  



  



  

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]:   


  

2012-02-28 [Nekko fox]: Also...BOSS NIGGER


  

2012-02-29 [Lord Josmar]: 
2012-02-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-02-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-03-02 [whitehot]: wow.
2012-03-04 [kians mummy]: [Nekko fox], wow, how long did it take you to think of that.
2012-03-04 [kians mummy]: http://sammiehs.page.tl/Main-page.htm
2012-03-04 [Nekko fox]: Who says I think? WHO SAYS I THINK?! WHO IS SPREADING THESE LIES?!


*Drop-kicks a customer looking for change for a dollar so he can use the pay phone outside because he's stupid and should have gotten a cell phone. What is this? The Dark Ages?*


Also, not long.


*Goes back to reading a tweet about a vlog about a blog about an article written about newspapers and sips his Breakfast Beer (Comes in a variety of delicious flavors; Eggs and Bacon, Pancakes and Orange Juice, Oatmeal and Cinnamon, and the most popular, Beer!)*


And since when did you start using Bob's Diner and Manifesto-Press as the graveyard for all your woe-begotten websites and wiki rejects? You know, Bob's isn't exactly the place to put your hopes and dreams, ridiculous and impossible though they are...


*Refreshes the page of the website he is on and sees that someone has tweeted about a vlog about a blog about an article written about Sammie, including several compromising pictures of her and some disparaging words about her typing and MS Paint skills*


Hm, news gets out fast.


*Goes back to tweeting about vlogs about blogs about articles that were written and ignores the outraged shouts and scuffling in the Diner for people struggling to be heard because they haven't been served in years and are somehow, miraculously, still alive, albeit extraordinarily hungry*
2012-03-04 [Nekko fox]: Also, you really should be more concerned that all of your posts are going to be devoured by Misty. She's already eaten half the table that she encompasses.
2012-03-04 [XxTsomexX]: Wow, looks like you've all really spruced up the place.


And there is my little pony? Fuck yeah.
2012-03-04 [Nekko fox]: Oh, yeah, I forgot about that.


*drags the pony out into the back room*
2012-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *shots ring out*
2012-03-04 [Nekko fox]: *Comes back with buckets of glue*


Glue for everyone!


*Throws it on the patrons*
2012-03-04 [Nekko fox]:
*several children suffocate under the glue and become permanent fixtures in the floor next to the bar*
2012-03-05 Hitler: Glue statues? You cant make money off of that! You should have boiled them down for soap! That way you would have gotten an in on the Black Market for both explosives AND modern hygiene.
2012-03-05 [Nekko fox]: *Several of the employees look up with blank-staring eyes*


"What's hygiene?"


*Nekko throws them a rat to keep them occupied, watching them scrabble for it like a bunch of hungry workers scrabbling for a rat*


Nothing, now get back to cleaning out the rat cages! And remember to "wash" your hands after you're done.
2012-03-05 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko indicates a jug of lye in the corner*
2012-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from his spot in the corner*


Stop pointing at me!!


*coughs lye on a passing child, who starts screaming*
2012-03-05 [Nekko fox]: *One child starts screaming and so they all start screaming. Nekko retrieves his stick, 'The Condition', a wooden cane covered in Christmas light that blink merrily, razor wire and a horn mounted in the handle that shouts advice when the stick is swung. Nekko starts 'Conditioning' the children to not scream."


"STAND UP STRAIGHT!"


"DON'T SPEAK UNLESS SPOKEN TO!"


"TUCK IN YOUR SHIRT!"


"GOOD CHILDREN ARE SEEN AND NOT HEARD!"


"DADDY DRINKS BECAUSE OF YOU!"


"ALL HAIL LORD SATAN!"


2012-03-07 [Nekko fox]:




My work here is done. I must go, my people need me!



2012-03-12 [kians mummy]:   



This is our newborn Kian, born 10/03/2012
2012-03-13 [Nekko fox]: He looks delicious. I'll get baste and spices and we'll have a barbecue.


*lights the grill that is powered by the destroyed hopes of children*
2012-03-17 Hitler: Was delicious.
2012-03-24 [Nekko fox]: Curse you Elftown crash! Bob's diner lost several comments to that failure! UNNACCEPTABLE!


*Kicks Hitler's baby-dinner leftovers*
2012-03-24 [Pillowthief]: Im blaming Cecelia. She broke my internet too.





(When it zooms in on the 99 Notifications, you'll notice there's a tab that says 'problem loading page'. Thats you, Elftron. Way to go.)
2012-03-24 [Nekko fox]: Bite the pillow...I'm going in dry.
2012-03-24 [Pillowthief]: But it hurts us when you do that!
2012-03-24 [Nekko fox]: Oh, my bad. *gets the tacks and razor wire often associated with this activity*
2012-03-24 [Pillowthief]: I would sob, but I know that that would just make it last all the longer...
2012-03-24 [Nekko fox]: You learn quickly.
2012-03-24 [Nekko fox]: *Gets more razor wire*
2012-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry. Google managed to save some of those wonderful comments we all enjoyed so much:


2012-03-17 [kians mummy]: Do you know, most of Bob's diners fans have Left Elftown, true fact


2012-03-17 [Pillowthief]:   



2012-03-17 [Nekko fox]:   



2012-03-19 [kians mummy]:   



Hedda thinking of Elftown lol


2012-03-19 [Avaz]: I like thinking of [Hedda] as the legendary Jack Nicholson. )


2012-03-19 [kians mummy]: Ha Ha x


2012-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's panties start to bunch up*


2012-03-20 [U.N.S.C Sabre Pilot]: thats wrong [kians mummy] but funny


2012-03-20 [Nekko fox]: I prefer my Jack of the -ie Chan variety.


  



2012-03-20 [kians mummy]: lol
2012-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm so happy all those hilarious comments by [kians mummy] were saved.
2012-03-25 [Nekko fox]: They are Bob's Diner's most treasured comments.
2012-03-25 Hitler: Hurray.
2012-03-25 [kians mummy]: LOL
2012-03-26 [Nekko fox]: Who stopped by?
2012-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh? What? No, deliveries go around back.
2012-03-26 [Nekko fox]: Deliveries? Huh? When?
2012-03-28 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Pop rocks and cola? What?
2012-03-28 [Nekko fox]: Lions and tigers and bears, oh my?
2012-03-28 [Pillowthief]: STOP! You have to pay for those!
2012-03-28 [Nekko fox]: NO I DON'T!
2012-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: YES YOU DO. NOW PAY WITH YOUR BLOOD. *chops off [Dainty Delusive Doll]'s arm with a sword*
2012-03-29 [Nekko fox]: *Gathers a few gallons in a bucket and pours it into the cash register*


There we go. All accounts settled.
2012-03-29 [Pillowthief]: Good. Glad that we got that settled.
2012-03-29 [Nekko fox]: Not the land dispute. That requires a urinary transaction. Hand over your bladder.
2012-03-30 [Sideways]: *climbs in through the window, drops to a crouch*
Meemeemeemeemeemee.....


O-o .... o-O


*crawls under the beaner table and up a Hispanic ladies dress.*


Meemeemeemeemeemeemee...


*woman screams and runs flailing* Stands up from under the table*


And... Knowing is half the battle!


*Disembodied voices yell in chorus*


G I Joeeeeeee!
2012-03-30 [Nekko fox]: *All of a sudden, Cobra rushes in, guns down the disembodied voice, confiscates its bladder, and throws it into the blood bucket*


Land dispute settled.
2012-03-30 [Sideways]: *blood bucket explodes in a bright flash of fire and smoke, and the bladder rockets into the air, yet safely parachutes back to the floor.*
You can't kill the G I Joe character, the G I Joe Character will live on.


Guns tried to kill the G I Joe character, but they failed
as they were parachuted to the ground
Rockets tried to kill the G I Joe Character, but they failed
As they were floated down. To the Ground.
Nuclear weapons tried to kill the G I Joe character, Hahahaha,
THEY FAILED!
As they were gently blown to the ground.


*Jack Black runs in and threatens to sue, but Cobra shoots him to death. Jack Blacks soul begins to float up into heaven but a parachute pops out of it and it floats back into his body. Revived, Jack Black begins to scream in agony.*


Dammit, fat man, the only cure for bullets is cock push-ups! DO COCK PUSHUPS!
2012-03-30 [Nekko fox]: These things happen.
2012-03-30 [Sideways]: *Screams wildly and punches [Nekko fox]*


That's what you get for making me look at male fox ass everytime I've visited your page for 4 years. Also, for your vaguely English tweed overcoat.


*Nekko's face explodes and his lips fly off and parachute safely to the floor.*


Now, for some nighttime sustenance!


*creeps over to the diner bar on knuckles and heels*


meemeemeemeemeemeemee...
O_O
2012-03-30 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko's lips scuttle after [Sideways] and awkwardly chew his leg off. the action itself is made more phenomenal by the fact that they are lips and, therefore, have no teeth*


You also love the fox butt.
2012-03-30 [Sideways]: *finds he has trouble scuttling across the floor like a posessed acid-tripper, finds his leg gone*


AHHH! Someone call the police! *points in the direction of the ghetto table*
NIGGER STOLE MY LEG!




2012-03-30 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-03-31 [kians mummy]: Naked Competitions
2012-03-31 [kians mummy]: sins
2012-04-02 [Pillowthief]: Solicitors go in the side door!


*points towards the 'Jesus Freaks' entrance to the satanic club we host downstairs*
2012-04-02 [Sideways]: Naked nigger sin competitions? Oh man... What has this diner come to?? O_o
2012-04-02 [kians mummy]:   
2012-04-03 [Susie-Q]: The parade was wonderful except for a few unruly brown tigers who showed up. So, we shall build a large fence to keel out all the brown tigers. White tiger kingdom, white tiger kingdom. All hail shoshon, the elegant. The white tiger king.
2012-04-03 [Nekko fox]: Tiger you say?




  

2012-04-04 [Mikhul, the Bard]: Ummmm! Godzilla eggs! <3
2012-04-04 [Mortified Penguin]: What did you just say to me? WHAT DID YOU SAY?! *grabs Mikhul by the collar*


SERIOUSLY, I CAN'T HEAR YOU. ALSO, THIS IS A REALLY NICE COLLAR, WHERE DID YOU GET IT?
2012-04-04 [Nekko fox]:






Collar?...




COLLAR?!




COLLAR?!?


I am a banana now.






  

2012-04-07 [Sideways]: I will go to war with your evil, infidel bannana (and also start a picture war,) a destroy you with a pre-emptive strike of my secret weapon





Your resistance is nullified.
2012-04-07 [Nekko fox]: I counter with Bad-Ass Demon Viking Santa.


My point, rather than nullified, it is reinforced and viciously rapes both your superheroes, because of Santa's ageless knowledge of the world and his gremlin helpers.


  

2012-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort counters with a seagull*


  



It's super effective!
2012-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort gains 3,000 exp. and [Sideways]'s wallet*
2012-04-07 [Nekko fox]:   



GOD IS NOT AMUSED




*God rapes Mort and [Sideways] with his epicube*
2012-04-08 [Sideways]: *corpse raises from the ground and regenerates to it's normal...err...well it's usal self*


Thank Star Factory Face Man for that Auto Phoenix enchanted Tommy Hilfiger wallet I bought. I see now the stakes are raised, but even Viking Santa and Star Factory Face Man, even with his Epicube, shall bow down, for I have the all powerful, soul destroying, face melting power of
ROCK!!!





By the way, they are performing "Come Sail Away" by Styx, So you know you have lost.
2012-04-08 [Nekko fox]: A pity that Darth Pyramidhead had to outdo your stale picture with his unbridled rape.


  

2012-04-08 God: That is a very close depiction of my awesomeness. And my Epicube.
2012-04-08 Jesus: Yeah, it is dad. Pity Sideways likes to pretend that Starwars is as cool as you and your Epicube.
2012-04-08 [Sideways]: Yeah, Darth Phallic Symbol and his transgender StormHomos don't impress me, But, is that the Christ I hear shit talking me? I will not be badgered by a FRAUD like you, Jesus of Nazareth! We all know you failed in your duty to die for our sins! You were afraid of death and wrath of Satan! I know full well you excercized your Star Factory Face Man-y powers to escape your destiny!


I HAS TEH PHOTOGRAPHIC PROOF!


  

2012-04-09 God: Quiet. That was a picture from his play, 'I cant Take This Shit Anymore', performed in front of a crowd of 8.6 billion dead people. In Heaven. Hence the cloud background.
2012-04-09 [Nekko fox]: We can tell by the stylized rendering that that is not a true picture of Jesus.


However, the Romans did try to liven up the experience by taking pictures and making funny advertisements.


  

2012-04-09 [American Revolutionary]:    the soviet union protests the use of christ in a sane and appreciated way
2012-04-09 [Sideways]: 


The Colossus says that both Christ and the Soviet Union can receive his boot so far up their asses that they taste nickels. I'm sure he's given the treatment to some Soviet many, many times before in his homeland.
2012-04-09 [Nekko fox]: A pity the Colossus isn't an intellectual colossus and is easily destroyed by a simple rubixehedron.


  

2012-04-09 [Sideways]: 


The magical sentient rubix cube boy shall destroy your rubixehedron with his awesome powers of hideousness and immortal suck!
2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]:    cosmonaut george says that rubix cube boy was a failed circle jerk in an aids clinic, with a guy covered in paper cuts
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: agh. when will god tell white people to suck a dick? reprimand cosmonaut george. reprimand cosmonaut george! nothing is happening, but its weird how all that banana stuff went down. no more can be said here
2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]:    susie-Q consider yourself FUS RO DAH'ED!!!!!
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: well i'm from the isle of morrowind so all your dragon speak hoobity booity holds no wieght for me. if your want to settle this over a nice game of pictionary that would be great
2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]: damn...you beat me..yet again..i give *waves white flag of surrender*
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: white flag? what the hell kind of racial supremecist are you? talking about white flags. you should be ashamed. all attempts hence forth to wave white flags should be considered unclean. Unclean!!!
2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]: erm...*waves red flag*
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: what are you? some kind of commie scum? surely you can do better than that. i guess i will have to help you. *hands you a tie-dye flag* that should cover it. cant complain when so many colors are present.
2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]: *paints a peace sign on it and "make love not war"* there we go
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: i see. youre one of those hippy dippy fellas. cant be help i guess. kids dont do drugs
2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]: *sits down with a game of pictionary* ok then, lets settle this your way
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: *yawns* i would but sailor jerry's always wears me out. but before i go i must uphold the most open minded of perspectives. WHITE TIGER KINGDOM!!!
2012-04-10 [Susie-Q]: good night all
2012-04-10 [Sideways]: Somebody tell me what the feck just happened? My war was just reduced to a game of pictionary! Well, now what I know what I was saving my Ion Cannon for!


  



Suck that, PILOT!


  



Now, What have you got, Fox Butt?
2012-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort grunts stupidly and looks up from grazing in the pasture*
2012-04-10 [Nekko fox]: You can't LOIC an Elder God. Or his Cheeseburger from beyond the stars.


  

2012-04-10 [Nekko fox]: Also, LOIC can't beat Angry God Fist.


  

2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]:    thats it, im outta here
2012-04-10 [Nekko fox]:   


























































































  

























WAIT! OH SHIT! WE'RE GOING SO FAST WE'RE GOING THROUGH THE GROUND!


BRB gone 2 China














  

2012-04-10 [American Revolutionary]:    well looks like my ships fucked, thanks to mort and his damn dildo rays of darth phallus!!!
2012-04-12 Hitler: You say your armor is light red, Soren? There's another name for that.


It's called pink.
2012-04-12 [American Revolutionary]:    how dare you insult me, i had faith in you returning hitler, you were my idol
2012-04-12 Hitler: Did you just 'Life Detect' me? That's gay.
2012-04-12 [American Revolutionary]: no i just 'death beam'ed your ass for mother russia!!!!
2012-04-12 [Nekko fox]: I'M BACK AND I BROUGHT A PLANE OF MY OWN! OH SHI-






  

2012-04-13 Hitler: They have another name for that.


Its called gay.
2012-04-13 Stalin:   
2012-04-13 [Susie-Q]: double rainbow all the way across the screen. it's so beautiful. what does it mean
2012-04-13 [Nekko fox]:


  

2012-04-14 [Susie-Q]: Lols hard core. Did you know that the use of any mind altering substances including nicotine alcohol and caffine is, by definition, considered to be an act of performing magic
2012-04-14 [American Revolutionary]:  <------------this is the reason why we are getting walked all over by other countries
2012-04-14 [Nekko fox]: That's a relatively simplistic and minute justification for why 'Mericuh is being stepped on. Especially considering none of them can just download magic magnets.


  

2012-04-17 [Pillowthief]:
  

2012-04-17 [American Revolutionary]: this is true
2012-04-17 [Avaz]: As a representative for the male species, I can say with utter certainty that Robin Williams is absolutely correct.
2012-04-17 [American Revolutionary]: indeed he is
2012-04-17 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-04-17 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Can't argue with that logic
2012-04-17 [Nekko fox]:






  



  

2012-04-18 [American Revolutionary]:    and shepherds we shall be
2012-04-18 [Nekko fox]: Yes! Destroy that evil cardboard with your plastic rifles! Your wrath will strike fear into heathens everywhere!


*some heathens look up, nonplussed*
2012-04-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *quietly bursts in and starts working behind the register, taking people's orders and money*
2012-04-18 [Nekko fox]: Woah, woah, woah! Mort, hold on, you can't just do that!


*Plugs the register in*


There you go.
2012-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, thank you! *Mort and a customer both laugh jovially at the silly mix-up* Ha ha ha, ah, Mondays... *Mort shakes his head, chuckling quietly to himself, and smiles before getting back to work and taking more orders*
2012-04-19 [American Revolutionary]: obama is the leading source of fascist ideas   
2012-04-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-04-19 [Pillowthief]:
  

2012-04-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-04-19 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-04-20 [American Revolutionary]:   
2012-04-20 [Nekko fox]:   



I got this.
2012-04-21 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: This thing has more gadgets than a Swiss Army knife. Including a Swiss Army knife
2012-04-21 [Nekko fox]: Well, you know that every good soldier will need to open a bottle of wine, pick his teeth with a tiny plastic toothpick, or pluck a hair with the miniature tweezers in the heat of combat.
2012-04-21 [American Revolutionary]: ok nekko, i admit, you beat me on this one
2012-04-21 [Nekko fox]: In the eternal words of Jesus and oft repeated by Gandhi, "BOOYAH!"


True story. Read the bible.
2012-04-22 [American Revolutionary]:    the russians are always ready to open a bottle of vodka
2012-04-22 [Nekko fox]: Vodka bottles had screw tops since before 1880, whereas the Swiss Army Knife was invented in 1891.


THE PICTURE IS A LIE!


  

2012-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Birds had shocked expressions since before 1743, whereas the camera wasn't even invented until 2007!


THE PICTURE IS A LIE!


  

2012-04-24 [Nekko fox]:   



The sky was invented in 1412 by Dmitri Protrerev under the influence of hallucinogenic tree bark, whereas the ground wasn't invented until 1800 by Sam Gruebder when he hit his head head in the bathroom while attempting to use erotic asphyxiation to heighten his pleasure.


2012-04-24 Hitler: True story.
2012-04-24 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Why the fuck did I sleep through history class?!
2012-04-24 [Nekko fox]: Because you were drunk during Physics. Now, everyone turn in their papers.
2012-04-24 [Avaz]: Pop quiz time: 
2012-04-24 [Nekko fox]: You failed your Pop Quiz. Please go sit in the back of the class.
2012-04-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *points toward the sarlacc pit in the back*
2012-04-24 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses [Avaz] into the Sarlacc pit*


Better study next time. Next quicz is in a thousand years.
2012-04-24 [Avaz]: Dammit! *force kicks the nearest trooper in the face*
  

2012-04-24 [Nekko fox]: He failed the test too. Wait, no that was Jeremy. Fuck, he wasn't even in this class.
2012-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *continues shoving kids into the pit*


...class?
2012-04-25 [Nekko fox]:   



Today in the debate we will be discussing new renewable sources of nameless, disposable henchman.
2012-04-25 [Avaz]: Is that Vader and Cobra Commander?
2012-04-25 [Nekko fox]: OF COURSE IT IS! Who else would be overseeing the Supervillain Quincentellian Convention of Evil?
2012-04-26 Sean Connery: Hmm. I had quite imagined that your mother would be there.


Ho Ho Ho! Got you now, Alex Trebeck!
2012-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Alex Trebeck runs away crying into his whore of a mother's arms*
2012-04-26 [Nekko fox]: These things were bound to happen.
2012-04-26 [Nekko fox]: But for now....




PIGEON FIGHT!





2012-04-29 [Susie-Q]: i have only one thing to say to any of this. "Cello Wars"
2012-04-29 [Susie-Q]: also, in response to elfpack's theme song,


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dXWgGw0-MjE



fluttershy ftw
2012-04-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-04-29 Hitler:
I dont always kill people,


But when I do, I paint the walls with their blood.
2012-04-29 [Nekko fox]: But your soldiers were all about the environment.


  

2012-04-30 Hitler: Propaganda spread intentionally to confuse the enemy.
2012-04-30 [Susie-Q]: flawless execution of JTHM. Rainbowstep is still the key to the future. after all. if a true sonic rainboom were to be created, there would be less issues in our wolrd
2012-05-01 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2012-05-01 [American Revolutionary]: hermann fegelien says otherwise   
2012-05-02 [Susie-Q]: if there's one thing the Nazi's were good at, it was fighting in a fuckin' basement
2012-05-02 [American Revolutionary]: this blather makes me mad   
2012-05-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Why must that image be relevant on both diners?
2012-05-02 [Nekko fox]: Why CAN'T it be relevant on both Diners? Double the Hitler, half the Juden!
2012-05-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *some Jews look briefly up from their Jew Fish Platter Specials at the two Hitlers before going back to pinching pennies*


*the pennies scream out in pain*
2012-05-03 [Nekko fox]: *the pain wonders why it is being screamed and in its moment of terrified desperation hides within Misty's folds*
2012-05-04 [Susie-Q]: Why is hitler's office so small? :\
2012-05-04 [Nekko fox]:


You know.... that's a very good question.




  

2012-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: That's probably why he's so mad too. And he doesn't even have a comfy chair, just some old wooden one.
2012-05-04 [Nekko fox]: Russia was stockpiling the chairs which incited the invasion of Stalingrad.


  

2012-05-08 [Susie-Q]: no such thing
2012-05-08 [American Revolutionary]: thats vietnam that stockpiled chairs, they hid the presidents golden shitter underneath the mass of used chairs from many of the fish processing sweat shops
2012-05-09 Gandhi: Actually, that's Istanbul, 2003. It was used for their Biennial, which is a contemporary art exhibit. Sucka.
2012-05-09 [American Revolutionary]: go back to your grave, ghandi, your peace talk is useless here
2012-05-09 [Nekko fox]:   


He shoulda used Mentos!
2012-05-13 [kians mummy]: The earliest known Mayan calendar has been found in an ancient house in Guatemala and it offers no hint that the world's end is imminent, researchers said Thursday.


Rather, the painted room in the residential complex at Xultun was likely the place where the town scribe kept records, scrawling computations on the walls in an effort to find "harmony between sky events and sacred rituals," said the study in the journal Science.


The hieroglyphs date back to the ninth century, making them hundreds of years older than the calendars in the Maya Codices, which were recorded in bark-paper books from 1300 to 1521.


Some appear to be the 365-day solar calendar, the 584-day cycle of the planet Venus and the 780-day cycle of Mars, said archaeologist William Saturno of Boston University, who led the exploration and excavation.


According to Saturno, the writing looks like someone's attempt to sort out a very long math problem, as if on a blackboard.


"For the first time we get to see what may be actual records kept by a scribe, whose job was to be official record keeper of a Maya community," Saturno said.


"The ancient Maya predicted the world would continue, that 7,000 years from now, things would be exactly like this," he added.


"We keep looking for endings. The Maya were looking for a guarantee that nothing would change. It's an entirely different mindset."


Furthermore, there is no sign that the much-hyped myth that the Mayan calendar would end in 2012, and with it the world, has any bearing in reality.


All that ended in 2012 was one of its calendar cycles, said co-author Anthony Aveni, professor of astronomy and anthropology at Colgate University.


"It's like the odometer of a car, with the Maya calendar rolling over from the 120,000s to 130,000," said Aveni.


"The car gets a step closer to the junkyard as the numbers turn over; the Maya just start over," he added.


"The most exciting point is that we now see that the Maya were making such computations hundreds of years -- and in places other than books -- before they recorded them in the Codices."


Even though the 12-square mile (31-square kilometer) site of Xultun, deep in a rainforest where tens of thousands of people once lived, was first discovered about 100 years ago, the house structure where the calendar is drawn on the walls was spotted in 2010.


Researchers say careful excavations have revealed that the paintings inside -- including some of human figures wearing feather head-dresses -- show the first examples of Mayan art on a house interior.


"It's weird that the Xultun finds exist at all," Saturno said. "Such writings and artwork on walls don't preserve well in the Maya lowlands, especially in a house buried only a meter (three feet) below the surface."




All I had to say was: Your point being???
2012-05-13 [Nekko fox]: Their point was that Hitler turned into a zombie and it's all Jesus' fault.
2012-05-13 Hitler: NEIN! NEIN! NEIN! NEIN! NEIN!


DO NOT LISTEN TO ZEE FOX! IT TELLS LIES!


ACHTUNG! WIENERSCHNITZEL! VOLKSWAGON! OTHER GERMAN WORDS!
2012-05-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Alright, Hitler. You're gonna need to CALM THE FUCK DOWN. *slaps sammie with a glove covered in razor blades that isn't a glove, but actually a pile of razor blades*


Now... CALMLY explain... Where the HELL is my SANDWICH? I LEFT IT RIGHT HERE IN MY MOUTH TWO YEARS AGO.
2012-05-13 [Nekko fox]: Why don't you ask....


THOSE SANDWICH STEALERS OVER AT TABLE SIX!?!


*two cockroaches skitter about in the ancient scraps left by the skeletal patrons nestled in the booth*
2012-05-14 [Susie-Q]: if that's an image of when jesus walked on water then where are the other guys that were in the boat with him? after all, only one tried to walk with him.
2012-05-14 [Nekko fox]: Jesus drowned them in an attempt to hide his terrible halitosis.
2012-05-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Luckily, Jesus did eventually succeed in trying to his terrible halitosis.
2012-05-14 [Avaz]: *Random verbs insert themselves into other people's conversations.*
2012-05-14 [Nekko fox]: *Observation made to foment unrest*
2012-05-15 Hitler the Grammer Nazi: *peeks into the Diner, looks suspiciously around, but sees nothing out of place. For now.*
2012-05-15 [Nekko fox]: Their right you know. In fact, your on the right track, just look over they're. There having some fun right now, using you're video game system as we speak.
2012-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY, YOU ADDED A VERB, CHEATER.
2012-05-15 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, well, you've used adjectives before, so it's only fair!
2012-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: The hell I have. Name one time.
2012-05-15 [Nekko fox]: Yesterday! I saw it! I saw you adjective all over the place!
2012-05-15 [American Revolutionary]: enough!!! you two take it outside!! *a man stands up to protest* shut it you fucking bronie!! *shoots him in the face*
2012-05-15 [Nekko fox]: *The brony's head explodes into confetti and love-fluff. It promptly combusts and is quickly extinguished by a drowning hobo. Physics be damned*
2012-05-16 [American Revolutionary]: *watches the homo, i mean hobo humping, i mean extinguishing the cum covered, i mean combusted remains of the butt sex partner (oh hell, what the fuck?)*
2012-05-16 [Nekko fox]: *Me watches the linguistic failings of mankind*
2012-05-18 [Susie-Q]: actually nekko that occured when the original My Little Pony series was created in the late 80's, early 90's. it could be argued however that mankinds linguistic failure could have occured during a later date when the fist page of the twilight "saga" was written
2012-05-18 [American Revolutionary]: (that was a total fail wasnt it?)
2012-05-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the tree in the kitchen grows slowly and menacingly*
2012-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the shade from its malevolent branches foreshadow dark things to come*
2012-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the night comes and is dark*
2012-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *with the dark comes the cold and patrons of the diner don their jackets and thicken both their clothes and the plot*
2012-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *The plot is tilled by the plow of deception and seeded with kernels of intrigue. The land is then irrigated with water...suspiciously*
2012-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *the kitchen of despair is now really messy and there's dirt everywhere*


[Susie-Q], I'm docking your paycheck heavily for this.
2012-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Continues shoveling Despair Dirt ©℗‽※⁂◊®℠™ into the kitchen, having used [Susie-Q]'s paycheck to buy a new Shovel℗®™ with which to do it*
2012-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU FORGOT THE SECOND TRADEMARK SYMBOL ON Shovel℗®™™.


*the FBI, CIA, NSA, CDC, FDA, and PBS all burst in and start lining up to order our delicious food*
2012-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *The FBI, CIA, NSA, CDC, and PBS begin fighting over who ordered what, while the FDA calmly orders a salad. The tumult begins spreading to other tables*
2012-05-29 [Avaz]: *Tumult stops spreading after only just a few tables, then complains of being spread too thin*
2012-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *glowers at the the Paeidroes™ brand Paeidroe who was spreading the tumult*


Lazy child! What do we even feed you for if you can't even do this one thing out of hundreds of other tasks we have for you!


"Pero, señor, no me des de comer..."


No talking back! You know I don't speak your googly-moogley.
2012-05-29 [Avaz]: He must be a communist Chinese spy!
2012-05-29 [Nekko fox]: I thought he was one of those French-talking Italians from Germany...
2012-05-30 [Avaz]: Hmm, you might be right.
2012-05-30 [Nekko fox]: Of course. You question?


  

2012-05-30 [American Revolutionary]: *a french nazi looks up* ciao bella
2012-05-30 [Avaz]: You are credit to team, doktor!


MEDIC!
2012-05-31 [Nekko fox]:   



Heavy has no use for Medic.
2012-05-31 [American Revolutionary]: no medics are needed
2012-05-31 [Avaz]: Cry some more!


(In a related note, I've been playing a lot of TF2 this week, and the fact that these ET comments have been TF2-related has made me want to play even more.)
2012-05-31 [Nekko fox]: Tell heavy MORE.


  

2012-06-01 [Susie-Q]: i have absolutely nothing to say about whats happening. so, i'll have bottle of jerry's and a tall glass please.
2012-06-01 [American Revolutionary]: *pours susie q her drink* there ya go *smiles*
2012-06-01 [Avaz]:   
2012-06-01 [Susie-Q]: *takes hefty swig* nope, still nothing. *continues drinking*
2012-06-01 [American Revolutionary]: *laughs* may i join you?
2012-06-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-06-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-06-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-06-01 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-06-04 [Susie-Q]: *calls to the waitress* bring out a round for everyone. what ever they choose
2012-06-04 [Nekko fox]: Actually, she's on lone from Sammie's diner. Just found the note from Sammie.


*Waves the C# from a low-octave around*


*watches as waitress begins screaming incoherently at some of the roaches (welcomed, paying customers) and flips there table before hulking out and smashing the roaches with her ham-like fists*
2012-06-04 [Susie-Q]: ow. fuck. i really wish hitler's sister would stopp working at my favorite diners
2012-06-05 [Susie-Q]: if only i was sober... nope, can't think of how this would be better sober.
2012-06-06 [Nekko fox]: Everything is better when not-sober!


*does a line of coke. Then, as an afterthought, he lays out a line of cocaine*
2012-06-07 [Susie-Q]: there is literally a man passed out in the upstairs bathroom do to *over-consumption of alcohol.


*over-consumption: the idea that there is a limit that should not be passed but was, at the discretion of the individual. many consider this to be mere hogwash and would rather push the envelope for the good of all alcohol loving peoples
2012-06-07 [Susie-Q]: and thats the story of jesus
2012-06-07 [Nekko fox]: Well, he was considered a drunkard and a glutton in the bible.


2012-06-07 Jesus: *Looks up from the massive amounts of food on his table and thirty-six bottle of SoCo that he finished off already*


Bi- :urp: Bitch! Whu-what did you say...say to me?


*He leans over and vomits on one of the Paiyedroehs*
2012-06-07 [Susie-Q]: It's cool J. it's cool. here, have some pita and hummus
2012-06-08 Jesus: *Eats some hummus*


This shit tastes like quail vomit.
2012-06-08 [Avaz]: That's because that bowl you're eating out of IS the quail vomit. The hummus is in this one here.
2012-06-08 [Nekko fox]: Actually, it's Quail Vomit brand hummus.
2012-06-08 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-06-08 [kians mummy]:   
2012-06-08 [kians mummy]:   
2012-06-08 [Susie-Q]: that is incredibly adorable
2012-06-08 [kians mummy]: I know x
2012-06-08 [kians mummy]:   
I promiz I waznt trying to scratch ;)
2012-06-08 [kians mummy]:   
2012-06-08 [kians mummy]:   
2012-06-08 [Koho Ai]: 2nd Amendment: The right to arm bears lol jk
2012-06-08 [Nekko fox]: *Backhands pixie elf with one of the scrabbling Pay-Droes*


Pictures without context are prohibited in Bob's Diner!


*Posts pictures on the diner wall*






  

2012-06-08 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: I knew it was a choice
2012-06-08 An Armed Bear: *Back-Hands [@101309] with it's armament*


CHOICE IS PROHIBITED IN BOB'S DINER!
2012-06-12 [Susie-Q]: Unless preemptive action is taken to make the same choice the diner would have made for you before the diner's action based on that choice is executed.
though you would still have to choose to do that. well shuckadingdarn
2012-06-12 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Just thought I would pop in and say 'hello'.
...so I did.....and I didn't think much farther than that honestly. Eh, oh well.
2012-06-12 [Thunder Cid]:   
2012-06-12 [Nekko fox]:   
2012-06-21 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: hello anyone
2012-06-21 [Nekko fox]: *Sends Paey-dro out to help the customer*
2012-06-23 [Susie-Q]: and another sacrifice, i mean fine individual, has come to give themselves up for the progression of evil, i mean has come to observe fine culture and dining
2012-06-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *stands behind the cash register, taking orders*


"Help! Please, no! Where are you taking us?!"


SHUT UP!!


*Mort angrily slaps the crying orders*
2012-06-24 [Nekko fox]: *he grabs the orders and tosses them in the trash*


"Dear God, whyyyy?!"


*smashes the orders in with his jackboot*


How did they even get up here to begin with?
2012-06-24 [Susie-Q]: they are the residual effect of so many nazi images
2012-06-24 [Nekko fox]: *reaches for something unobtrusively, the act hauntingly similar to a certain gesture used by a particular socialist party in the 1920's-1940's*


Damn it, why does waving my arms eagerly never get me the things I need?


*He sobs as his arms windmill much like the Windmill Socialist party members used to in Croatia before the Windmill movement was stamped out*
2012-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from the thing he was previously looking at and does an action worthy of interest*
2012-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *hundreds die and the economy of a small island in the South Pacific collapses in direct result of Mort's dastardly action*
2012-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: What have I done...? I... I'm a monster... *sobs remorsefully and wipes his snout with his hoof*... *hurls baseball bats into traffic to calm his nerves and advertise a once great American sport to drivers on their way to work/the hospital/Bob's Diner to get the all new 4th of July Salad! Now with 40% less lettuce and 200% more AMERICA! ᵐᵃᵈᵉ ᶤᶯ ᶜʰᶤᶯᵃ*


WARNING: 4th of July Salad is named for its expiration date and should not be consumed by infants under the age of 400 months, expecting mothers, unexpecting mothers, expectorating mothers, plain mothers, plane mothers, moths, Mothra, and the British. May cause death, disembowelment, explosion, more death, and, in severe cases, mild headaches. Do not consume before lifting heavy machinery or driving a car or driving heavy machinery or lifting a car or lifting a lift.
2012-07-02 [Nekko fox]: Damn it Mort, making me lawl.


[Read: Lawl: slang term meaning Loyalist Acrobats Whisking Legumes]


  

2012-07-02 [Koho Ai]: I'll take five of em
2012-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Five giant dicks, coming right up!


*five huge black men surround [Koho Ai], unzip their pants, pull them down, and then hand them to him*


"Clean our pants, bitch!"


Whoa... what a bunch of dicks... *shakes head disapprovingly as he spits in some guy's Deep Fried Buttered Beer Battered Cake Taco Burger Salad Shake™*
2012-07-03 [Nekko fox]: *Shakespeare is in the corner who is writing about/masturbating furiously to the sight of those massive dicks*
2012-07-03 [Koho Ai]: Okay, now that the hired guns are here, were gonna take over this world with one giant dick at a time.
2012-07-03 [Nekko fox]: *The black men are confused, both at Shakespeare being present, and why their bitch ain't cleaning their pants*


*they eat their Fried Chicken and watermelon, then wash it down with racially-approved Grape Drink while they wait for her get on with the cleaning of their pants*
2012-07-03 [Koho Ai]: *has brought in the finest looking maid outfit and forces it onto Hitler* Get to work Bitch, those pants are cleaning themselves *begins prepartions for BGD's takeover of the world* BGD stands for Big Giant Dicks
2012-07-03 [Nekko fox]: *Hitler is dead*
2012-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *the pants are, apparently, cleaning themselves*... *patrons clap and then return to their five course meals*... *with the return of the entrées, customers then begin eating*...
2012-07-03 [Nekko fox]: *this all occurs like a delicate dance, a coordinated ballet*
2012-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Bob's Annual Coordinated Dance and Delicate Ballet, however, doesn't do so well and ends up receiving very poor reviews after the lead dancer shatters her ankle during the big musical number on a tractor parked haphazardly on stage for some reason*
2012-07-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *Holocaust: The Musical never recovers from the failure at Bob's Diner and the play is never performed again*
2012-07-03 [Nekko fox]: *Bill Murray throws a temper tantrum and bitches get nothing*
2012-07-15 [Kestrelfeather]: Woo Sailor Moon!!
2012-07-15 [Nekko fox]: Fuck Sailor Moon!


*Eighteen black men promptly execute the command, finding Sailor Moon relaxing during her time off, and gang rape her. Photos are taken and pasted on the internet, ruining her social status and essentially turning her into a pariah. She becomes a recluse, becomes depressed, and disappears into the vague back streets of the city and ends up as a foot stool at Bob's Diner. Nothing of value was lost, or, in fact, gained.*
2012-07-15 [Kestrelfeather]: Sailor Moon was my childhood -.-
2012-07-16 [Nekko fox]: http://rule34.paheal.net/post/list/Sailor_Moon/1






And this is your childhood being raped...
2012-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort, hearing the words "childhood" and "raped" breaks down into tears over some guy's salad*
2012-07-16 [Kestrelfeather]: Now, raping my childhood isn't very nice.
2012-07-16 [Nekko fox]: My childhood has been raped so much it doesn't even feel it anymore.


Just you wait, next thing you know BAM!


Gummibear porn.
2012-07-16 [Mortified Penguin]: BAM!


Cheerios porn.


*watches an Asian man thrust his tiny penis into a Cheerio, becomes aroused, and furiously coats the aforementioned salad with a nice layer of Mort's Special Homemade "Ranch" Dressing*


*after finishing with the salad dressing, Mort then masturbates*
2012-07-16 [Nekko fox]: Fuck you Mort and your brilliant wit.


*No one else notices*
2012-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *not even Mort*
2012-07-18 [Avaz]: And this was the day that Bob's Diner was forgotten by all.
2012-07-19 [Koho Ai]: *standing outside the remnants of what left of the Diner* What was this place? I bet it sold porn and bacon. *continues walking*
2012-07-19 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his bacon and porn stand*


HEY! Fuck those assholes stealing my piggy back porno shack!
2012-07-25 [Koho Ai]: *walks up to the shack* Do you have a license to sell that bacon for sex, and that porn for peop;e to eat?
2012-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort rummages through his stack of licenses* Hold on, hold on... lemme find it... AH! Here it is! *Mort pulls out a large bottle of vodka and starts chugging it*


Deliveries go around back. *points at the front door and goes back to drinking heavily behind the register*
2012-07-25 [Nekko fox]: Mort. Mort! MORT!


You're drinking the register.


*Watches as the quarters and dimes are sipped away*
2012-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU'RE A REGISTER.


*chews a dollar bill*
2012-07-25 [Nekko fox]: Dear God, how did this happen?!


*He is a register, so his speech is composed of various clanks, dings, and catchy showtunes*
2012-07-25 [Koho Ai]: *places Mort under arrest for drinking in public, confiscates the register in the process* Your coming with me dirty criminal
2012-07-25 [Nekko fox]: *Clanks and clangs over, regurgitating change everywhere*


But he's not in public, he's in Diner. Which also happens to extend its privacy to outside forty-eight kilometers of the establishment's walls.


True story. I'm a lawyer.


*The register is wearing a tweed jacket now*
2012-07-25 [Koho Ai]: If you give me a pig I'll drop all charges. *holds hand to shake on it*
2012-07-26 [Nekko fox]: *Hands you Misty with his change drawer*


One pig, not fresh.


*shakes your hand with said change drawer*
2012-07-26 [Koho Ai]: *shakes said change drawer, and straps a leash on to Misty* Come on now my eyesight ain't as good as it use to be, but shouldn't this thing be making some noises of sort. *squints, but only sees a blurred image of Misty*
2012-07-26 [Susie-Q]: And the lord speaketh saying, "Jesus h god-bashing Christ! I give you free will and this is.what you people do with it?! That's it it, 2012 is back on!"
2012-07-26 [Susie-Q]: God turns to Jake and elwood. " well fellas looks like your mission isn't over yet"
2012-07-26 The Lord: Bitch, I never said any of that shit. And who the fuck are Jake and Elwood? Are you stupid? Quit putting words in my mouth.


*Eats ramen*
2012-07-27 Jesus H. God-Bashing Christ:   
2012-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Sweet merciful Satan, our comment average is down to 4.92 and we have only 34 days until the end of the friscal year! THANKS A LOT, [Susie-Q]. YOU TRAMP. YOU RUINED BOB'S DINER. *points at the newly polished and shiny floor*
2012-07-28 [Nekko fox]: WHAT DID SHE DO TO OUR FLOOR?! WHERE IS THE REFUSE?! WHERE IS THE DETRITUS?! THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE! AND YOU!


*Points and a damning finger at Mort*


WHERE ARE THOSE CHEESE FRIES FOR TABLE EIGHT?!
2012-07-28 [Koho Ai]: *stands outside waiting on random people to walk by* Target spotted at five o clock *Tne armed men come running from all directions and surround everybody who happens to be on the block where Bob's Diner is.* Okay, send them in. *The armed men start forcing local residents into Bob's Diner to increase production value* Sir operation Unfuck Bob's Diner was a fucking success, and production values are going through the roof since the armed men are forcing everyone to pay all their money for food. Oh and the potatoes were made into grenades.
2012-07-28 Armed Man 1: Bitches get moving, and put the damn money in the register *points gun at a random rich guy* You put your whole damn wallet in their now
2012-07-28 Armed Man 2: Hurry up and fucking eat you fat fucks. the other customer wanna their motherfucking food too
2012-07-28 Armed Man 3: *grabs a bunch of civilians, and forces them to set up tables outside Bobs Diner* Give me your God damn money, and we'll give you a penguin casserole with fox on the side*
2012-07-28 Chuck Norris: *round house kicks Bob's Diner causing the end of the world*
2012-07-28 [Nekko fox]: *Calls from inside a casserole*


MmMMmffmmmemfmmfmfmmmmffmfmffmm MMM!


*The insight given was so profound and moving that Chuck Norris reverse-kicked the diner back into place and instead began whirlwind kick street cars for fun*


2012-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: MY STREET CARS!


*crawls back into his casserole and curls up like a hushpuppy*
2012-07-28 [Nekko fox]: *The hush puppies are offended to be compared to someone like Mort, and even more offended that he mentions casserole*


*EVERYBODY KNOWS OF THE GREAT HUSHPUPPY SLAUGHTER OF '86 BECAUSE OF THE DUNKIN DONUTS CASSEROLE DISH "HUSHPUPPY HOLLAPALOOZA"*


*Mort is labeled insensitive by local media sources*


*There are no local media sources because B's D is in the middle of fucking nowhere*


*On that note, why did you drive all the way out here if you're not gonna eat something?*


*Hurry up, we ain't got all day. And before you ask, all the food already has roaches and pesticides in it, so you didn't have bring your own*


*Refills aren't free*


*Just pay shipping and handling*


*Results may vary*


*Do not pass go*
2012-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *stands near go, looking anxious and nervous*
2012-07-28 [Koho Ai]: *pushes mort pass go* Oh your fucked now
2012-07-28 [Nekko fox]: *Go moves slightly ahead of Mort*


*Taunting him*


*Mocking his inability to pass it*


*Go is a prick*
2012-07-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Can you bypass Go, or perhaps circumvent Go, meander around Go? Call his brother Free Parking for help?
2012-07-29 [Koho Ai]: *shoots free parking in the face and takes his wallet* Damn no money this time. *starts looking for Go again*
2012-07-29 [Nekko fox]: *Go blends in, wanting nothing to do with this*


2012-07-30 [American Revolutionary]: *grabs go by his throat cause hes been involved in the largest KGB conspiracy against president obamas underwear bombs and hes tossed into a car* you say a word well fucking kill you
2012-07-30 [Nekko fox]: *Go bites down on the cyanide capsule secreted away in its mouth*


"Do not pass 'Go', bitch!"


*Go dies with a mocking grin on its face*
2012-07-30 [Koho Ai]: *arrives at Go's house where I find his family Mrs. Go, his son Go jr, and his daughtor Backwards Go* Hello, you must be Mrs. Go. I'm looking for your husband Mr. Go. Have you seen him around?
2012-07-30 [Nekko fox]: *Indicates the Go soup*


You should check in there.


It smells faintly of almonds.
2012-07-30 [Koho Ai]: *checks the Go Soup* This could be Go worthy. *Backwards Go walks in* OMG know I know why they call you Backwards Go. *leaves the house after seeing the horrible site that is Backwards Go*
2012-07-30 [Nekko fox]: *A creepypasta is created in her honor*
2012-08-01 j@y: Long time no see *falls through roof & bows hat* =)
2012-08-01 [Nekko fox]: *Kicks the hat*


None of your crazy Japanese customs, Stetson.


Oh hi j-at-y.


*Pours him a bowl of something in the hat. It overflows because of a curious dent in it*


You should get your Japanese hat fixed, it's a terrible bowl.
2012-08-01 [American Revolutionary]: *sits alone in the corner watching all the patrons* no! its my vodka! mine! mine only! *beats away morts pet zombie with a broom handle*
2012-08-02 j@y: *wakes up in the trash behind the diner* What happened last night?!!!
2012-08-02 [Nekko fox]: *Mort's zombies falls into the diner trashcan*


*Starts chewing lazily on j-at-y's foot*


*The grinding of bones can be heard*


*The local negro community is attracted by the scent of fried chicken*


*property values plummet*


*crime rises*


*B's D is unaffected*
2012-08-02 [Koho Ai]: *The Anti Negro league is reestablished to reduce crime.*


*Thousands of rascist rednecks arrive on the scene sporting high caliber rifles for the hunting season.*


*crime begins to go down*


*B's D gets a lot more food to place in storage*
2012-08-03 Guille: Rich come on we are talking about Stanley T here? Stanley T power trpipin, no way ! If Mark's entourage is there and the are on the show to promote something why shouldn't Stanley T be allowed to ask them to participate and promote the Mash Up? If it was all in fun, then Rich, Ryan and Nicole, have a sense of humor and have fun. Geez give the brutha a break! By the way I listen to your show every morning and you all are the bomb !
2012-08-03 [Nekko fox]: *Shoots Guille in the leg*


No backsass from you, sir.
2012-08-03 [Koho Ai]: *The Anti Negro Leage establish Bob's Diner as the most happening place in the middle of no where*
2012-08-03 [American Revolutionary]: for my next impression dr. richtofan...wait...i dont know any of his quotes
2012-08-03 [Nekko fox]: *Dr. Richtofan can be seen legging it into the sunset, notes in his arms. He promptly burns up when he collides with the sun*
2012-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Huh. Sun's getting closer. *wipes some sweat off his brow, dabs on a little sunscreen, and promptly bursts into flames*
2012-08-03 [Nekko fox]: Mort, you've got a little fire there.


*Flicks water at him*


*It bursts into flame as well*


There ya go.
2012-08-07 [American Revolutionary]: *tries tank dempsey and fails, sticking with nikolai belinski*
2012-08-07 [Koho Ai]: *throws a gasoline filled balloon that turns into a fire ball*
2012-08-07 [Nekko fox]: *tanks a fire filled with balloons made of stick, gasoline throws balls and tries to fail*
2012-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *nikolai belinski*
2012-08-09 [American Revolutionary]: you were dead now, but you were dead before, ah fuck you
2012-08-09 [Nekko fox]: Nobody dies in B's D.


Nobody.


Ever.
2012-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: NOBODY. *gnaws on Tiny Tim's corpse covered in Pedro bacon*
2012-08-09 [American Revolutionary]: this is proper socilist reform
2012-08-09 [Nekko fox]: Socialist.
2012-08-11 [American Revolutionary]: pardon me my keyboard is a little on the fritz
2012-08-12 [Nekko fox]: No, I'm calling you a socialist.
2012-08-14 [American Revolutionary]: i am a proud socialist
2012-08-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort's jimmies start to rustle*
2012-08-15 [Nekko fox]: Socialist? Nope.


Chuck Testa.
2012-08-20 [Mortified Penguin]: OH MY SHIT.


We have just a few days before the end of the friscal year.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Nignog.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Eggnog.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Batdog.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Fat hog.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Cat cog.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: Stat frog.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: NANANANANANANANANANANAN ME
2012-08-20 [Koho Ai]: *sets up a small stand in front of Bob's Diner and accidently bumps into it setting off the dolls*


Dolls: Ah, me so horny. Ah, me so horny. Me love you long time.


Customers from all around the world come to the stand to buy the dolls, and then eat at Bob's Diner.
2012-08-20 [Nekko fox]: *They then promptly die of food poisoning/doll AIDS*
2012-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *scratches his doll AIDS and goes back to drinking heavily behind the counter*


*Mort gains +2 depression*... *Mort devolves into a black man!*... *Mort sobs and eats fried chicken*...
2012-08-21 [Nekko fox]: What has science done?


*wipes Science's nose in Mort and kicks it outside*
2012-08-21 [American Revolutionary]: *looks at the mort dolls* they look like my aunt gertrude
2012-08-21 [Nekko fox]: No, your Aunt Gertrude looks like Mort.


Also, I am so sorry that that is the case.
2012-08-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *angrily knits a sweater*
2012-08-25 [Koho Ai]: *stares at the now empty open casket of your Aunt Gertrude* Why is the body gone? *walks away*
2012-08-25 [Nekko fox]: *the sweater sobs helplessly as it gets knitted by Mort's furious needles, wondering what it did wrong and if, maybe if, it does what Mort says, maybe Mort will stop knitting it and they could be a family again"
2012-08-26 j@y: Banned from Eltown, Banned from Fake...Elfpack here I come!
2012-08-27 [Nekko fox]: It's because of all those nuns you raped J At Y.
2012-09-01 [Olwen]: *randomly throws a panda at Mort*
2012-09-02 [Nekko fox]: DEAR GOD, NO! MORT IS VIOLENTLY ALLERGIC TO PANDA!
2012-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *sneezes slightly and then returns to his newspaper*
2012-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, the friscal year ended a few days ago. Lemme go whip up some graphs real quick... *grabs his graph whip off the weapon rack and storms out the door, not noticing a few huddled graphs sobbing silently in the corner*
2012-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *returns, dragging a screaming graph behind him*


  

2012-09-06 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2012-09-07 [Nekko fox]: So, according to these graphs, faded colors in an ascending pattern create creatively engaging pieces to post irrelevant information.


This is good to know.


*Begins taking notes*
2012-09-13 [Nekko fox]: Wait...


I'm not even in the right class.


*He changes from Mage Healer to Rogue*


*Tries to undo a trap*


*rolls a 1*


*Utter Failure that ends forty arrows shot at him*


*Roll 20 on reflex save*


*grabs customer and uses them as meat-shield*


*Meat-shield holds!*


*15xp, 3 gold and a Ring of Defense +1 are awarded to him*


2012-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort changes from his leisure tux to his work tux*


*Tries to redo his trap that somebody messed with*


*rolls a 20*


*resets trap*


*attempts to open the fridge*


*rolls a 20*


*takes out a sandwich*


*rolls the sandwich*


*eats the die*


*Mort starts choking*


*rolls the sandwich*


*gets a 20 somehow*


*Mort lives and is successful in everything*


*4000xp, 145000 gold, and the Cloak of Poor Defense -6 are awarded to him*
2012-09-14 [Nekko fox]: WTFHAX!
2012-09-19 [Amphetamine Psychosis]: wow its been forfucking ever since ive been on this thing
2012-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: PAY YOUR TAB! *snaps Tiny Tim in Twain and hucks berries at you hard enough to hurt like the Dickens*
2012-09-19 [Nekko fox]: *People assume it's a situation of Pride, but instead it is his Prejudice that spurs Mort onward, which also reminds the onlookers of his late brother Artimys (Art for short) who went off to War despite his trepidation of choosing War over Peace. If only there were a Time Machine that could be used to go back and stop the atrocities...*
2012-09-21 [Ninja Smurf]: Yes! Get in the time machine and stop Morts parents from having kids! Atrocities avoided! *set's etch-a-sketch to send Nekko back in time, it fails. *
*throws stupid toy into the soup pot*
2012-09-21 [Nekko fox]: *the soup goes back in time and becomes the Hero God-King of the Mesozoic Era*


*Bitches be illin'*
2012-09-24 [Susie-Q]: *Gilgamesh looks up from a soft back copy of Gilgamesh towards the soup, wearing a somber look upon his delectable ripples. Gilgamesh: "I know how you feel. The cover on my book doesnt look like me either" *goes back to his reading*
2012-09-25 [Nekko fox]: *The soup triumphantly rides into the Diner on the back of a tyrannosaurus, smites Gilgamesh with his kingly sword, and rides off into the sunset, simmering contentedly*


*He is eaten later by a starving orphan who happened to be present when the soup had settled down for the evening*


*the orphan gets tetanus from the soup*


*Somehow, the tetanus spreads to the other orphans in the orphanage*


*suddenly, the tetanus is actually gasoline and a lit match*


*It was actually Mort*


*I'm implying Mort burned down the orphanage*


*Also that Mort is tetanus*


*woo*
2012-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from his newpaper*


Well, I'll be.


*takes a bite of a flaming orphan and goes back to his newpaper*
2012-09-26 [Nekko fox]: Mort you always make my day.


*Looks at the shipping manifest*


On that same note, you should be done with my day by now and have moved onto the eighty-six other days that we have on order. Come on, what do I pay you scorched orphans for, if not for this very reason?
2012-09-26 [Susie-Q]: *reads headline of national inquirer (a periodical of note)* mutant cat-fox hybrid trades scorched orphans for free time.
*reads next article*        David Attenborough caught masturbating to an audio recording of Morgan Freeman.


2012-09-26 [Nekko fox]: *Finishes his latest rhetoric article that he writes for the National Inquirer (an upstanding and honest periodical) about how the pope deflected a meteor with his body without sustaining injury, thus preventing a doomsday from celestial debris*


Hm?
2012-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his copy of the National Inquirer (the world's foremost leading source of truth in the media)*


Cabbage. I said CABBAGE. Learn to LISTEN!


*notices a large skag chewing on the corpse of Tiny Tim and heroically quick draws his blaster, shooting Tiny Tim dead*


*the audience claps*


*Tiny Tim is none too pleased*


*Tiny Tim's big brother, Large Tim, comes bursting in, waving a gun in Mort's face*


Deliveries go around back.


*Large Tim apologizes for the misunderstanding and heads around back to deliver the gun*
2012-09-27 [Nekko fox]: *Shoots Large Tim as he tries to deliver a full-sized cast model of a Skag to the back*


*the audience cheers*


*Tiny Tim is still none too pleased*


*Large Tim is a meat-potato*


*People who understand the reference will not understand the context*


*People who understand the context will not understand the reference*


*GOD HAS SPOKEN*


*God is calmly told to be quiet while people are eating*
2012-09-27 qt4qt7tq1tq1: this site is dead
2012-09-27 wy5wy8yw2yw2: Yeah, well qt4qt7tq1tq1 is a nigger-dick sucking whore! I should know, I'm his older brother!


Sorry, that was completely uncalled for...


Whore's get paid. qt4qt7tq1tq1 Is just a nigger-dick sucking tramp.
2012-09-27 O==>: wy5wy8yw2yw2 so eloquently stated
2012-09-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *a bunch of nigger dicks stand up for their rights and are spitting mad*


*after unloading like that, they just sort of sink back into their seats and hang their heads low*


*not much is remembered of those brave nigger dicks, except that they had balls for doing what they did*
2012-09-27 [Nekko fox]: It's nice that we can have such open-minded, accepting conversations at Bob's Diner (an upstanding and morally-guided restaurant of outstanding character).
2012-09-27 [Flisky]: *kills Bob's Diner's character* I demand a new character build! *slinks back into the ether, disappearing among the mist*
2012-09-28 [Nekko fox]: *Re-roll's Bob's Diner's Character's Sheet's with Multiple's of Dice*


*'s*
2012-09-29 [Koho Ai]: *rolls a 1 and dies immediately*
2012-09-29 [Susie-Q]: *photocopier rolls crit fail for reprinting character sheets. Bobs diner characters are deported back to the void due to lack of proper paperwork*
2012-09-29 [Nekko fox]: *the void rolls a crit 1 and fails to consume the characters, promptly regurgitating every Drizzt knockoff, Ogre Sex-Fiend, Waifish Waif, and carbon-copy Adventurer ever dreamt.


Bob's momentarily becomes Ye Olde Robert's Pub of Adventure*
2012-10-01 [Susie-Q]: *the copier, for its treachery, is drug into a field and executed mafioso style. The trees rejoice but are silenced by company loggers cutting them down to be used Hepburn and power the photocopier manufacturing plant.*
2012-10-01 [Nekko fox]: *The manufacturing plant (Bob's Diner, Photocopier Manufacturer, Hair Care, and Tire Center) destroys nations worth of trees to create the plastic for their photocopiers*


*the engineers don't understand that plastics are created from oil*


*somehow they manage to get by*


*people are confused*


*Nekko reads his newspaper*
2012-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort also reads his newpaper that was made from oil by undoubtedly confused engineers*


*Mort reads a fascinating article about Olive Oil*


*Mort is actually reading a bottle of Olive Oil*


*Mort sighs and takes a shot of oil*


*Mort gains +2 defense*
2012-10-01 [Nekko fox]: What's this? Mort is evolving!


Mort has evolved into Olive Oil.
2012-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort is now able to walk on water!*


*Mort, unaware of this new ability, simply reads his newspaper and mutters angrily to himself about "deliveries" going "around back"*
2012-10-02 [Nekko fox]: *Water seems slightly miffed that it doesn't get to experience getting walked upon by the second coming of the third messiah at the fourth hour on the fifth day of the sixth month*


*Water is also a sexual deviant and would get off on that*


*watch where you step*
2012-10-06 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~sets fire to the oil~ O.o
2012-10-06 [Nekko fox]: *the resulting conflagration destroys the local plant nursery, two hospitals, an orphanage, a nunnery, and the smut shop*


*everyone mourns the loss of the smut shop*
2012-10-10 [American Revolutionary]: *rambles on something about the sky bieng red* its the apocalypse i tell you!!! or its just oblivion
2012-10-11 [kians mummy]:   
2012-10-12 [American Revolutionary]:    dont you dare come near me you overgrown housecat
2012-10-13 [Nekko fox]:
  



BLOOD FOR THE BLOOD GOD.


AFTER A WHOLESOME BREAKFAST.
2012-10-13 [Sheamus Finn]: . . <---- Actual size of steroid using blood god's testicles
2012-10-14 [Nekko fox]:                              ^--- That made no sense, please revise with proper punctuation.
2012-10-14 [Nekko fox]: Also, the Blood God doesn't use steroids, just his rage-driven soldiers. Everybody knows that. What kind of heretic are you?
2012-10-14 [Sheamus Finn]: My Apologies these * * represent the Blood God's rage-driven soldiers testicles
2012-10-14 [Nekko fox]: Better.
2012-10-20 [Sideways]: *crashes in through the front window*
Mememememememe Did someone say "Apocolypse??" Or was it only "child molestation" again?
wait...





There we go. Two birds with one stone. You dont have to thank me. Bill's in the mail
2012-10-21 [Sideways]: Wonders if Mort is okay* Look, I know deliveries go around back and all, but Mort, man, it's not like you to miss your "massively inapropriate" cues! I'm shocked!
2012-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I didn't miss them, I have them right here. *gestures at a pile of penis shaped pool cues*


They're right here, behind these inappropriate pool cues. *pulls out some Q's*


WHAT IS THIS SHIT? WHERE ARE MY W'S?! *violently backhands Misty to death*
2012-10-23 [Sideways]: Wrong storage box! *Reaches into Misty's fat, pulls out letters.*
She only had F's, A's, and, T's.
2012-10-23 [Nekko fox]: *Reaches behind Misty because everyone else is doing it*


*Is sucked into her gravitational pull*


*Burns up in the atmosphere*
2012-10-23 [American Revolutionary]: *sits in one of the wrecked remains of a table, and talks to a skeleton of a patron who rejected the rat in his soup* uh huh good story good sir...
2012-10-23 [Nekko fox]: *the skeleton coughs dust into his face*
2012-10-23 [American Revolutionary]: *chokes* ahem....do pardon me...
2012-10-23 [Nekko fox]: *the skeleton coughs more dust*


*the skeleton also refuses to pardon you*
2012-10-24 [American Revolutionary]: *chokes some more* sir i do believe the dried remants of morts lungs are bieng hacked into my face...maybe thats why the smell like rotted antelope ass
2012-10-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~sits on a bar stool giggling~
2012-10-24 [American Revolutionary]: *adjusts the collar on my tunic and stands up and backhands the skeleton, his head going rolling acoss the floor* ermm...that wasnt supposed to happen
2012-10-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~grins as the skeleton turns to dust~ Well that was entertaining, Yes?
2012-10-24 [American Revolutionary]: *nods* yeah..until that happened..
2012-10-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: It entertained me ~giggles and spins around in the bar stool~
2012-10-24 [American Revolutionary]: *falls outta the booth*
2012-10-24 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~falls off my stool~
2012-10-25 The Dust of the Stricken Skeleton: *Floats upon a draft and forcibly violates [@182119]'s and [@107284]'s lungs, causing spasmodic coughing, tears, running nose, and mysothelioma*


*also points out that Astartes misspelled 'guard' in his name*


*tries to laugh, however he is just dust*


*Floats away in fear at the sound of an approaching Hoover*
2012-10-25 [Sideways]: Bursts out laughing* distracted, is annihilated by own summoned Holy Buddha Shining Finger* X_x;; XD
2012-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: O.O ~coughs~
2012-10-25 [American Revolutionary]: *hacks up my left lung* gahhh...damn skeletons!!!
2012-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~looks at him~
2012-10-25 [Nekko fox]: *Me watches as the Skeletons of the Damned (also heretofor called Damned Skeletons) angrily rise up from their table as they are blamed for bone dust that isn't theirs*


Easy folks and...unfolks.


Keep the fighting to the restrooms.
2012-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~hides behind Nekko~
2012-10-25 [Nekko fox]: *Gets the hose, preparing for some sexy Wet-Skeleton vs. Damp Human action*
2012-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~runs away and hides in a cloest~
2012-10-25 [American Revolutionary]: -dives out the door, fallin off the cliff, bieng bobs diner is the only object that survived the apocalypse-
2012-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~since I was in the diner I survived as well~ =D
2012-10-25 [Susie-Q]: *walks out of the ladies room with a copy of paradise lost* my God, he was right
2012-10-25 [Mortified Penguin]: STAY OUT OF MY OFFICE.
2012-10-25 [Fallen Child Athena]: ~runs to the bathroom~
2012-10-25 [Sideways]: *sideways-vapor mixes with bone dust, fuses into strange powder, lands in Mort's chocolate mocha coffee, becomes sentient liquid sideways chocolate, rapes Nekko*
2012-10-26 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko laughs because it was in fact his dream to be raped by liquid chocolate, so they joke is on Sideways*
2012-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort sobs over the loss of his chocolate mocha coffee and because nobody is raping him*
2012-10-26 [Flisky]: *promptly proceeds to build a robot with the express purpose of raping Mort*
2012-10-26 [Kbird]: please vote for [~Crimson Angel~]!!
2012-10-26 [Kbird]: I love this craziness!!
2012-10-27 [Nekko fox]: *Votes for THE ANGEL OF CRIMSON (note the all caps) because it is a divine being of pure light, goodness, and smut*


*Yes, smut*


*we all have our priorities*
2012-10-29 [Avaz]: THE ANGEL OF CRIMSON (making due note of the all caps) is in the Smut God's employ.
2012-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! This is a family restaurant, you guys! If you're gonna have smut, you gotta have some for the kids too... *hands a little girl a massive stack of horse porn, some of his finest available*


*Santa, seeing Mort's amazing act of generosity, breaks down and starts sobbing. Having not seen this kind of an act since he gave his own life for everyone's sins, Santa promptly gives all his presents to Mort*


*Mort hocks the presents at the pawn shop and buys a fresh batch of meth*
2012-10-29 [Nekko fox]: *The pawn shop owner dies from the surprise as he opens the presents he bought only to find them full of the demonic creatures exhumed from Pandora's box*


*the exhumed demonic creatures consume his rapidly cooling body*


*the all get mild indigestion*


*they believe a quick dose of meth will calm them down a bit, and luckily they know a guy*


*Nekko looks up from his Ritualistic Cannibalism Guide for Beginners Guide of Redundancy Guide*


Mort's in back.
2012-10-30 [Sideways]: *Throws self over his table, which seems to be rumbling, shaking, and sprouting tentacles from underneath it's limited edition Bob's Diner Actually Washed Sometimes table cloth*


Pay me no mind! I just... Accidentally summoned Cthuulu while trying to entrance a succubus to rape Nekko...




Also, I meant Succubus, as Nekko would only enjoy an Incubus.


Also, can someone run to the corner store and buy a can of Old-One-B-Gone? Quickly? *looks under table* get the kind that kills spiders too. It's got the blue label.
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: *Tosses [Sideways] a bottle of breath freshener*


That should work.
2012-10-30 [Sideways]: *spritzes breath freshener at Cthuulu, Cthuulu becomes minty insanity-death.*


Oh jeezus! If I have to die, why couldn't have been tropical flavor? Wait! This gives me an idea!


*tosses Fruit Stripe gum into Cthuulu's mouth, Cthuulu is entranced by excellent flavor but then immediately sent into a deep depression at the immediate loss of all flavor. Cthuulu loses the will to resist he Chinese from the next door laundromat harvesting his tentacles (and also Mort's cat) for sustenance.*


Thanks, Nekko! Your officially endorsed name brand gum saved the day!
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from the pile of thousands of other things that he officially endorses, including Cthulhu-Smiter, the wacky-fun electro-racket used for fending off eldritch terrors*
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from the pile of thousands of other things that he officially endorses, including Cthulhu-Smiter, the wacky-fun electro-racket used for fending off eldritch terrors*


I was watching the tunnel scene from Willy Wonka on repeat one day when my mother came in and asked me to take out the garbage.


I turned around slowly and whispered, "You're not my mother"


She let out a Tarzan scream and leapt from the window, falling 30 stories below. Quickly, I rushed down the stairs and reached her dead body. A crowd slowly gathered.


One small boy looked up and asked me, "¿Por qué estoy desnudo?"


I shook my head and quietly murmured, "It was beauty that killed the beast."


I was hit by a bus
2012-10-30 [Sideways]: Yep, Nekko caught the insanity death. *looks down mournfully*
ooh, piece a candy!
Ooh! Piece a candy!
Ooh! Piece a candy!
Ooh! Piece a candy!
Ooh! Piece a can-- YAWW! That tastes like vomit and hot sauce and
OOH Dear GAWD the fiery pits of Hell NyuuuuuuuEEEEEEE


*picks up Mort's flicked boogers off the ground until he picks up a leftover meatball from the Spaghetti Special, then falls into the deep frier.
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: Welcome to Bob's diner, home of zombies, landwhales named Misty, abyssal entities, orphans, forced/imported labor, and hellish planes of existence, where time, space and physics mean little in conjunction with what happens here.
2012-10-30 [Flisky]: *looks over her newspaper for a second before straightening it and mumbling something about the state of the economy that doesn't make any sense to anyone but the poor Mexican orphans in the back*
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: *the mexicans in the back look over their area's supervisory managerial consultant (a meaningless title, all in all), [Flisky], and sy something about American economics that doesn't make sense to anyone but the angry Russians in the corner*
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: *the mexicans in the back look over their area's supervisory managerial consultant (a meaningless title, all in all), [Flisky], and say something about American economics that doesn't make sense to anyone but the angry Russians in the corner*
2012-10-30 [American Revolutionary]: *sits with angry russians* anyone know ra-ra-rasputin?
2012-10-30 [Avaz]: *a heavy man with no hair on his face looks up* Russia's greatest love machine?
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: It was a shame how he carried on....
2012-10-30 [Avaz]: The DJ in the corner turns his speakers on and: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cdkBs0VCSX0
2012-10-30 [Nekko fox]: *The band promptly walks over and pummels the shit out of the DJ with their instruments, sobbing heartily. Skrillex is in the corner, remixing the sound of a seventeen-car pile up overlayed by the sound of a sack of cats being thrown at a wall. His fans, all devoid of musical taste and standards of quality, piss themselves like over-excited dogs, throwing money at him to make him press 'Play' on his Mac*


*the music industry dies of internal hemorrhaging, but the common masses do not notice*


*Bob's Diner stockpiles Madonna and Smashmouth cd's in its basement for use as future barter material as civilization collapses*


*angry boy bands and slutty female pop singers roam the land, devouring their fans for sustenance*
2012-10-30 [Sideways]: XD! Also, Snatchmouth sucks.


*Stockpiles Harry Chapin and Peter Townsend CDs*
2012-10-31 [Avaz]: *Fall Out Boy is seen in the corner, silently sobbing into a miniature napkin*
2012-10-31 [Kbird]: *pat,pat* it's fall out boy I like your music, but I'm crazy so it might not be good. or is it?
2012-11-01 [Sideways]: *Blink 182 stabs Kbird for being a comercialist consumer traitor asshole fairweather fan douchebag-apottomus*
2012-11-01 [Kbird]: I like blink 182 too! *turn to dust* I well be back!
2012-11-01 [Avaz]: *After defeating the DJ, the members of Turisas move over to the Russians and order a couple rounds of Black Slavs because they didn't want to be seen being too patriotic ordering Black Russians*
2012-11-02 [Sideways]: *bowling for soup mopes in the corner, wanting to also be relevant. The Sex Pistols sit in the back lamenting the homos (not in a good way) who ruined their music while polishing their new hipster glasses*
2012-11-02 [Kbird]: hipster glasses yay!
2012-11-02 [Nekko fox]: *watches as The Great Band Wars begin, where everyone tries to conquer everyone else's music despite the subjective nature of its quality*


*turns a page of his magazine*


*is confused how he has a magazine in the End Times*
2012-11-02 [Flisky]: *starts making T-shirts reading "I survived the band wars of 2012"*
2012-11-02 [Kbird]: *hide under a table* I'm all alone I'm all alone.
2012-11-02 [Sideways]: Chuck BerryTron stomps into the Diner and annihilates the Sex Pistols with his super Rock and Roll guitar hyper beam of ROCK!


*Dio ascends from Hell to crush ChuckBerryTron, in a battle set to a theme written by Tenacious D, all makeup done by the Cure*
2012-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Justin Bieber bursts in, wielding katanas and doing amazing flips*


"Can you validate parking here?"


Yeah, sure.


*validates his parking*


*he thanks me and flips back out the door*
2012-11-02 [Nekko fox]: *watches passively over his copy of End times Millenia Magazine as a wave of raging middle-school girls swarm over the Biebs and consume him to gain his power*
2012-11-02 [Kbird]: *Sum 41 leaves through the back door.*
2012-11-02 [Avaz]: *My Bloody Valentine enters through the back door. Not the back door of the establishment, just to be clear.*
2012-11-02 [Kbird]: *yollow card enters through the front do and stares down My bloody valentine*
2012-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mozart bursts in, with a bomb strapped to his chest*!


*he takes a seat at the bar and orders a shot of whiskey*


*the seat is replaced and the whiskey does as it is told*
2012-11-03 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: haha I had to re-read that.
2012-11-03 [Kbird]: *Chopin nods at mozart* Fun fact! chopin was called "little Mozart" when he was ten-39!
2012-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: We still don't have a friscal report... and I'm too lazy to make one...
2012-11-04 [Kbird]: what is a "friscal report"?
2012-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: A report on friscal status, of course.
2012-11-04 [Kbird]: okay so whats a "friscal"? *head is leaning slightly to the left do to being confused*
2012-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah. Anyway, deliveries go around back.


*goes back to reading his newspaper*
2012-11-04 [Kbird]: *hang up side down trying to figure out what a friscal is*
2012-11-04 [Nekko fox]: *Throws [Kbird] outside with the trash, hooligans, Mort's old underwear, and those Tim McGraw albums that no one listens to*


*throws the deliveries out back*


*throws out Mort's newspaper*


*throws out Mort*


*Life throws Mort back*
2012-11-04 [Kbird]: *drowns is trash*
2012-11-04 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: what a dirty way to die....and not even in a good way....
2012-11-04 [Sheamus Finn]: Wait! Mort's paper? What are we gonna use for toilet paper now? *Grabs Wall street journal* It's just not as soft....
2012-11-04 [Kbird]: *crawl in the and hide under a table* join me Jadala this is the only safe place.*shake,shake*
2012-11-09 [Amphetamine Psychosis]: roast beast for the holidays
2012-11-09 [Nekko fox]: * sets a date for the Roast Beast Comedy Hour, everyone being invited except Sunrose and Jadala. Misty is only tolerated there because she will be acting as the stage*
2012-11-10 [Sideways]: Misty is the stage??? :O


*immediately puts in an order for fifty floor buffers, 200 glaaons of clorox, and 50,000 square yards of latex*
2012-11-10 [Nekko fox]: *the Glaaons of the mighty nation of Clorox are upset they are being called upon for cleaning jobs*
2012-11-10 [Sideways]: Shit! I just started another alien invasion! Quick! While there's still time! Someone get me 800 quarts of diluted bleach!!!


But I know man... This is a disaster! The roast is in danger! If Misty is the stage we'll need to douse her in chemical cleaning agents, scrub her clean, and then after thar, for bio-hazard safety reasons, cover her in three inches of latex!
2012-11-10 [Kbird]: *hands sideways 800 quarts of diluted bleach* Yay!! Misty-Sama!!!
2012-11-10 [American Revolutionary]: *plays russian roulette with a fully loaded revolver*
2012-11-10 [Kbird]: *gos back to hideing under the table*
2012-11-10 [Susie-Q]: *looks up from portable dvd player with prometheus in the disc reader* Scientology was soooooo wrong. wait... whats happening?
2012-11-10 [Kbird]: I agree. IT's called madness.
2012-11-10 [Sideways]: Prometheus??? Nyuuuuu!!!


*Prometheus proceeds to suck so fantasticly hard that it forms a singularity in [Susie-Q]'s DVD player, which proceeds to collapse the room onto her an suck her into cinematic Hell*
2012-11-10 [Amphetamine Psychosis]: and so we enter the long dark teatime of the soul
2012-11-10 [Sideways]: Mort... Who are these people? *looks at strange people, alien to Bob's Diner* Why aren't they ground up in the Boston chowder?
2012-11-11 [Kbird]: I'll take care of it.*grabs an axe*
2012-11-11 [Nekko fox]: *watches as [Kbird] struggles weakly to pick up the hatchet near the register, used for organ donations to the soup*


*he goes back to reading his napkins*


Those people are just negroid creatures that help. We hired them to cook the tostadas in the back.


*in the back are tribe of angry hairless gorillas wearing baggy shirts and loose pants. While cooking the often flash complicated finger signs at one another as a means of communication before becoming angered over one thing or another and becoming violent without reason*


*or maybe those are just underpriviliged inner-city teens*


*Nekko does not have the wherewithal to know or care*


*He's a little bummed out because the tostadas are terrible*


*He kicks one of the little mexican orphans they keep in back stock*


Damn it Paco, why didn't you tell us your family can't cook?
2012-11-11 [Sideways]: *One of the negroid's backstage wades out to the bar and waves her hands in complex signs, her techno arm guantlet clanking around.
"Amy. Bored. Amy. Bored. Tickle. Amy. Tickle Amy. Tickle. Amy!" she says


Away with you! Bad gorilla! No one reads Crichton anymore!!! *polishes Truman glasses and rubs it on my tweed jacket*


2012-11-11 [Nekko fox]: * a large grey specimen of a gorilla walks by and crushes Amy with a pair of Stone disks classed in its hands*


*nothing of value was lost*
2012-11-14 Yanet: McCain and Obama don't know much about the economy. McCain even amtids he doesn't know much about the economy. The stronger players in economics will be Ron Paul, Mitt Romney and Hillary Clinton. I don't know about Huckabee.
2012-11-14 [Sideways]: Who are you and why is your grey matter leaking through your nose? It's making the bullshit coming out of your mouth all slurred and unintelligible.
2012-11-14 [Nekko fox]: Oh, that is just our retarded comic relief. They spew bullshit to distract people from the seriousness of our situation, which is that we are out of Mountain piss, despite the zombies in the back working overtime to make it.
2012-11-14 [Nekko fox]: * several shuffling zombies walk through the diner, dribbling urine as they go. Paco comes along behind them with a mop, squeezing out the gathered fluid into specially marked bottles that are set on the shelf, sold for no more than 8 dollars a bottle*
2012-11-14 [Nekko fox]: *production, however, can't meet the growing demand of the excited customers*


* the shelves are dubiously empty, and angry shoppers begin throwing other angry customers to vent there impotent rage*
2012-11-14 [Sideways]: Holy crap! *gets hit with an overweight, elderly Fillipino woman.* that felt fairly potent to me, asshole!
2012-11-14 [Nekko fox]: * looks up from behind his desk set behind a plexiglass barrier*


Nah, still impotent.
2012-11-14 Marko: omg now you know you need to get rid of himm and find someone who loves you all of you        ..ok so you loose the wehigt to me you dont have any wehigt to loose i wish i bwas tour size,,,,,,,,,anyway whos to say how hes gonna act when you have a baby or two or if something bad happens to you or your body may god forbid ,hell act the same way hes acting now
2012-11-14 [Nekko fox]: hey, Marco, polo's off dealing with sports right now. Come back after a few classes in an English course, okay? Okay.


* goes back to googing racial epithets on his computer*
2012-11-15 [Kbird]: *Tosses Nekko Fox the axe* you take care of this mass I'm going on break!*hurrys into the back*
2012-11-15 [Nekko fox]: *looks up, axe buried in his skull*


The hell is a 'break'??
2012-11-15 [Kbird]: heehee sorry I'll uhhh get a docter.
2012-11-15 [Nekko fox]: *sniffs the air curiously, blood dripping out of his nose and eyes*


what smells like red?


*Red, the brutish lummox they use for security, sniffs under his arms and then indicated himself with a grotesquely sausage like finger*


oh, well nevermind then.
2012-11-23 [NibblerLove]: Wow I found an active place to chat!!! Finally, something is alive. <3 So how do I go about ordering something frisky? XD
2012-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Money helps.
2012-11-23 [Sideways]: And a lack of will for self preservation. In fact, that's mandatory. Sez so right under the open sign.
*Points to the dress code/ legal disclaimer sign, and also waves hello to Butch, the bouncer who checks for Darwin Awards/guest passes at the door*
2012-11-24 [Flisky]: *looks up from paper* Did someone say 'Flisky'? Oh...no...wait. Just frisky. Nevermind.


*opens paper again, mostly ignoring everything else that's happening*
2012-11-24 [Nekko fox]: *Butch, confused by Sideways' obvious attempt at a display of dominance, becomes enraged and rips him in half, flailing angrily about with the corpse-remnants until half of the diner is splattered with blood*


*[NibblerLove] is caught in the tide of horrified consumers who trample her 'neath their mighty, combined tread*


*Anarchy reigns as Butch lets out a roar like that of a thousand emotionally abused step-children crying out at once and devours Mort's leg*


*the prosthetic one*


*he chokes and dies while clutching feebly at his throat*


*Nekko turns a page of his magazine made of money*


2012-11-26 [Kbird]: o.O I shouldn't ask.
2012-11-27 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: That might be a good idea*ducks under a table near the wall*
2012-11-27 [Avaz]: *the ducks under the table near the wall quack at their space being invaded by a white werewolf named william*
2012-11-27 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: *looks at the ducks* where did they come from O.o
2012-11-27 [Flisky]: So that's where my ducks went. *grabs a duck and throws it in the soup*


*the duck happily swims around in the giant vat of cold soup*
2012-11-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Jamal the black werewolf bursts in, with his jeans hanging off his upper thigh and his gold chain glistening in the sunlight*


"Yo, where all the white women at?!"


*Mort points around back*
2012-11-27 [Nekko fox]: *the white womenz scream 'Rape!' and several off-duty cops beat Jamal the Black werewolf with their pistols and batons, several shouting about resisting arrest and one discreetly setting a can of iced tea and some skittles beside Jamal*
2012-11-27 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: You cops have something against werewolve*comes out from under the table growling*
2012-11-27 [Nekko fox]: *Bill the Whity Wolfboy is cudgeled unconscious by Paco the racially-androgynous immigrant of displaced heritage, wielding a frying pan full of eggs...or huevos*


Good job Paco the Racially-Androgynous Immigrant of Displaced Heritage, for your good deed we may actually feed you this week.


*a cloud of hope crossed Paco's eyes before it is crushed beneath the burden of reality*


Also, bring up a couple zombies from the basement, we're low on pork-rinds and we need a substitute.


*the cops finish up by shooting Jamal in the head with a silver bullet and going back to their table, claiming self-defense.*


Good work boys, keeping our streets and diners safe.


*the state determines that the police were acting in self-defense and ruled in their favor. Jamal the black werewolf's corpse is sentenced to a public flogging and fourteen consecutive life sentences in a maximum security prison. It gets violated repeatedly by his cell mates. The federal government outlaws werewolves and declares it National Werewolf Flogging day. Many children cheer and the economy is pulled partially out of its recession due to the influx of new merchandise*
2012-11-27 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: What the Paco you hit me with a hot frying pan*walks to the nearest table and sits down*
2012-11-27 [Nekko fox]: *Paco doesn't speak English and starts throwing huevos at William. The police start getting nervous that there will be gang violence between the Lobo Blancos and the Paco de Quinceañera Gringos*


*they premptively shoot William and Paco*


Good work boys, keeping our streets and diners safe...again.


*they sit down, grumbling about being off-duty*


*the state again finds the verdict in the favor of the officers. Another holiday is declared and the world reverts to the golden age of the 1940's, where men dressed snappy and could strike their wife*


2012-11-27 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Ya missed*walks out of the diner smirking*
2012-11-27 [Nekko fox]: *watches as one of the spare Paco's wipe up the massive blood trail hemorrhaging from the gaping bullet wound in the side of William's head*


*Nekko turns the page with a snort of distaste*


Kids these days can't even wipe up after themselves....


*A bunch of children, between the ages of six and forty-six chase after William, squealing and dribbling urine, snot and spittle everywhere and creating more work for Paco the Replicate*


*watches as they latch onto William's hair and scream with glee*


*None of the parents are willing to claim the children as their own and many divert their eyes*
2012-11-27 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: where did the childern come from O.o
2012-11-28 [Sheamus Finn]: Well, when a mommy and a daddy love one another....or the cheerleader doesn't take her pill....Or the condom breaks...
2012-11-28 [Nekko fox]: ...or that snooty girl with the low-cut skirt who has been flashing everybody at the bar that night has too many drinks and wants to walk home by herself...or if you are Mother Mary...or if you believe in the science of in vitro....
2012-11-28 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: sorry i asked*finds a random hobo and kicks him*
2012-11-30 [Mortified Penguin]: That hobo was my father... And you've killed him. I loved him like a brother...
2012-11-30 [Sheamus Finn]: Que up the banjos and Jerry Springer....
2012-11-30 [foxyvixen17]: *luaghs*
2012-12-01 [Nekko fox]: *Kicks the werewolf, instantly killing the dick out of it before reanimating it with forbidden necromancy*


*shit was so cash*


*no one offers to revive Mort's dead hobo father/brother*
2012-12-02 [Kbird]: ._. I'll walk away now.*walks off*
2012-12-03 [Nekko fox]: *throws a Mortified Penguin at kbirds back*
2012-12-03 [Kbird]: *eye twitchs after being hit*Who did that  Grabs a paco.
2012-12-03 [twitchboy]: Paco's cleaning up the cock fighting ring in the Bathroom mort. Its what he does every monday morning you know that
2012-12-03 [Sheamus Finn]: *points at Mort's dead hobo father/brother* He did.
2012-12-03 [Nekko fox]: *screams eruditely*


PACO FIGHT!


*[Kbird] loses immediately due to the shifting of transdimensional plains and fluctuating muons*


Well, that was boring.


*throws another Mort at [Kbird]*


Put him in the soup.
2012-12-03 [Kbird]: *drops the Mort in a fire place*Well that was lame.STOP THROWING MORTS AT ME!!grrr *kicks a Paco*
2012-12-03 [Nekko fox]: *The Paco becomes a Mort and instantly adheres to [Kbird]'s leg via reverse-osmosis, as unlikely or impossible as that may seem*


Yeah, deliveries go in the back.


*Takes a sip from his Mort while turning a page of his favorite Mort and reclining into his industrial-grade Mort*
2012-12-03 [Kbird]: aHHH WHAT THE!!!*Struggles to get Mort off*Do you have axe or something?
2012-12-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his Mort*


Morts go around back.


*Mort goes around back to confirm*


Yup, Morts go around back.
2012-12-03 [Nekko fox]: *Begins Mortabating with his marital Mort, using plenty of Mortricant*


You have to try this, it feels excellent.


*No Morts were sexual aroused in the making of this commercial*
2012-12-03 [Kbird]: o.O that one minute of my life I want get back
2012-12-04 [Sheamus Finn]: Sign says no refunds.... It also has a lovely singing voice.
2012-12-04 [Kbird]: I'm a worker......shouldn't say no pants,no shoes,no shirt no service
2012-12-04 [Nekko fox]: Workers comp is reserved for computers.


*the computer demands fair wages, benefits, and compensation for injuries as well as reasonable breaks*


*Nekko pours coffee on it*
2012-12-04 [Mortified Penguin]: AH, GODDAMMIT. I just wanted 10 minute bathroom breaks!


*Mort's motherboard explodes*


*luckily, he still has his fatherboard*


*his fatherboard goes out for a pack of smokes, but never comes back*
2012-12-04 [Kbird]: poor Mort.Wow when did so many ugly people come in?!!
2012-12-04 [Avaz]: When they installed the Ugly People Entrance door over there.
2012-12-04 [Kbird]: T_T why did they install that?
2012-12-04 [Avaz]: *shrugs* Ask management.
2012-12-05 [Nekko fox]: Because the really ugly people need to make deliveries to the back, so we needed a way to separate the two of them.


*Points at [Avaz] and [Kbird]*


Oy, deliveries go in the back I said.


2012-12-05 [Kbird]: T_T not funny.
2012-12-05 [Sideways]: Deliveries in the back??? That's unnatural! God says so!!!
2012-12-05 [Kbird]: Dirty
2012-12-05 [Nekko fox]: Don't you have deliveries to be making? That shit isn't going to stock itself.


*the items proceed to stock themselves in a neat and organized fashion*


Nevermind, you're fired.
2012-12-05 [Sideways]: Oh, that's right! I forgot.


*Delivers an outside-crescent heel kick to [Kbird]'s face, then hands a clipboard to [Nekko fox]*


Sign here, please.
2012-12-05 [Avaz]: *takes the clipboard in rage* That technique was awful. I will NOT be signing for subpar martial arts!


*signs on the line*
2012-12-05 [Nekko fox]: *proceeds to exercise a perfect heel-drop to [Kbird]'s head for having such an awful technique used on her*


*Carves his name in to [Avaz]'s shoulder and snaps them to the clipboard before handing the lot of it to [Sideways]*
2012-12-05 [Sideways]: *pours gasoline on [Avaz] then sets him on fire, in order to deliver the documents to my superiors via burnt offering* Okay, now that that is finished,  Nekko! I challenge you to a contest of Chinese Wire Air Running and Sword-Dodging Gymnastics! Imma show you the moves I used to fuck up Chow Yun Fat so hard he screwed up all his Mandarin lines... and sounded all half retarded. And stuff.


Have at thee!!!
2012-12-05 [Avaz]: It burns. ( ._.)
2012-12-05 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko's wire technicians, having prepared for this situation for years, begin working immediately, making Nekko glide effortlessly, gracefully upward on the smoke of Avaz's holy char*
2012-12-05 [Sideways]: Awww come ON!!! Nekko, man, we both know that is complete and utter hogwash BS.


[Avaz]'s char is NOT holy!!!
2012-12-05 [Nekko fox]: Until this aerial combat/dance is done, Avaz can be holy. Besides, Avaz got shanked by Paco, so it's more of a technicality.
2012-12-06 [Flisky]: *pats [Avaz] on the shoulder in sympathy*


That sucks. Uh...*picks up the arm that just fell off* I think you dropped this.
2012-12-06 [Sideways]: *Uses the "Crouching Pervert, Hidden Tickle" technique on [Flisky]


:)
2012-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *prepares to use the ancient art of the page flip*


*flips the page of his book*


Now that I have flipped the page of my book, I can show you all the ancient art of the page flip!


*shows everyone some ancient art on the flipped page. It is really pretty artwork*


*while everyone is distracted by Mort's amazing patent pending technique, he quickly steals from the register*
2012-12-06 [Avaz]: *is reborn from his ashes not as a mighty phoenix, but an ash golem*
2012-12-06 [Nekko fox]: *spritzes the ash golem with water, making it a murky grey ash puddle*


* uses the grey ash puddle golem against unwary adventurers who are dungeons diving for rare and mystical treasure*
2012-12-07 [Avaz]: Hey, I has a useful after all. ^^
2012-12-07 [Nekko fox]: Actually, it was more of as a joke for player-based content, usually about primordial ooze.
2012-12-07 [Flisky]: *is ignoring everything now, going back to her paper but realizes that it has Avaz ash on it* Aww. Now it's all unreadable.
2012-12-07 [Nekko fox]: Ha! You can't ignore things if you're drawing attention to yourself.


*is ignored*


*is in a vacuum*
2012-12-10 [Avaz]: *uses the Schwartz to switch the vacuum from Suck to Blow*
2012-12-10 [Imperator]: Having been disappeared from ET for some 10 months, I must say this Bob's Diner (and the whole town) looks even more decrepit than I imagined possible! What an awful 11/12 friscal year!
2012-12-10 [Nekko fox]: Implying Bob's Diner isn't consistantly decrepit
Implying that by not contributing for ten months he isn't partially to blame
Implying that implying is a reasonable form of accusation
Implying an implication
Implying
2012-12-11 [Sideways]: [Imperator]? Oh, come on! We all know who is really underneath that conquistador armor, you fraud. We all know it's you, [Bitchinator]. you hipster douchebag!


Personally, I blame Mort. I think he's hiding something. Like cancer of his Abdula OblongTrolla. You know, the part of your brain that makes you say "Deliveries go around back" like a kid with Tourette's?
2012-12-11 [Nekko fox]: *Looks up from his Mort*


Kids with Tourette's go around back.
2012-12-11 [Imperator]: *responds to implied implications* Our own faults should not blind us to the faults of others. *spoken like a true sage*
2012-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *responds to responded response* Our own salts should not blind us to the salts of table four. *spoken like a true parsley*


*meanwhile, table four is out of salt*


*and the soup needs parsley*


*and table six is on fire, much to the distress of the man sitting there, screaming*


TAKE A NUMBER AND WAIT IN LINE!


*the man takes a number and returns to his seat sadly as Mort meticulously counts out grains of salt for table four*
2012-12-12 [Nekko fox]: "Accepting one's faults is a mark of maturity, while denying the faults of others is surest sign of a fool".


*Spoken like the internet*


"Also, the nigglets in the bathroom are breeding at an alarming rate."
2012-12-19 [robinrobin]: Hi all! This place looks crazy. lol. What does someone recommend i have for dinner?
2012-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, deliveries go around back.


*goes back to reading his paper*


*the paper is all in Russian and Mort is sad, because he does not read Russian*


*he pretends to read the paper anyway, just to keep up appearances*
2012-12-19 [Nekko fox]: *several nearby Russiabns laughs heartily over the headlines in Mort's paper*


*they try and discuss it with Mort who they think can read, and by proximity, speak Russian*


*there is awkwardness when they realized that Mort can't read Russian*


*there is awkwardness when they realize they can't either*


*there is even further awkwardness because they are really a couple of nerds from Massachusetts *
2012-12-19 [Csitri]: *wanders in and takes a number*


*takes a seat at table six*


*begins eating the salt at table six one grain at the time*
2012-12-20 god: I demand you to all come to join www.linkmeet.com and get it back up and running
2012-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: But... but I'm already on linkmeet.
2012-12-20 [Flisky]: Obviously god wants you to join again. *steals Mort's Russian paper and replaces it with her own two year old one*
2012-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: But... but... God is just Sammie trying to get people to join because she's obsessed with sucking up to [Hedda], because she thinks she can get more privs...
2012-12-20 [Flisky]: It's god, not God. God would never want you to join again. :P
2012-12-20 [Nekko fox]: So, what your saying is that god is a false and fickle god below our notice?


I'll let Sammie know.
2012-12-20 [Flisky]: Break it to her gently.
2012-12-20 [Csitri]: Or break it over her head like a well placed lamp.
2012-12-20 [Nekko fox]: What if I break it over her head gently?
2012-12-20 [Flisky]: That works.
2012-12-20 [Nekko fox]: *Prepares his well-written, thoughtful, and slightly condescending speech on a lamp*


*the lamp is a brick*


2012-12-20 [Avaz]: *the brick is a cake*
2012-12-20 [Flisky]: *the cake is a lie*
2012-12-20 [Viking]: It is? I thought it was partially processed uranium.
2012-12-20 [Avaz]: That's why it's a lie.
2012-12-21 [Susie-Q]: *wakes from an alcohol, and partially peyote, induced coma*        I've seen the other side, its similar to this one given the illusion that this side didn't suck so much. MLP is real there, though they are far more hideous and terrifying than Lauren faust made them out to be. Also vermin supreme is lord and master of that realm.


*looks down at the condiments*        


Could I get some more salt and a far tire 1554 please
2012-12-21 [Nekko fox]: No, no more far tires for you.


Only Near tires for you from now on.
2012-12-21 [Flisky]: What about medium range tires?
2012-12-21 [Csitri]: There's no such thing. There are, however, infinite range tires. They are made of clouds and dreams.
2012-12-21 [Avaz]: But infinite range tires don't really exist, because fascists are constantly stomping out those dreams.
2012-12-21 [Viking]: I thought they were physicists.
2012-12-21 [Avaz]: Physicists are only stomping the dreams of creationists. They leave other groups of people alone, I think.
2012-12-21 [Csitri]: Dreams live on in the hearts of bronies, though.
2012-12-22 [Susie-Q]: What about pegasisters who's dreams are made of Ponies who eat skittles and shit rainbows? We cannot afford to forget this demographic. If we do the terrorists, and, oddly, the veagans, win. I don't know about you but I like the idea of my children growing up to read and eat steak burgers
2012-12-22 [Susie-Q]: Not to mention even Batman cannot defeat fascist operated cartoon ponies. With the power puff girls gone, online forums and the Wendys baconator may be our only chance for preserving the human race.
2012-12-22 [Csitri]: Bacon can solve anything. Well. Bacon and boobs.
2012-12-22 [Sideways]: Gah! Strange people! Ponies who shit rainbows?? According to television commercials produced by Skittles, you will fall to your death from a height of no less than 33,000 feet if you fail to not only taste, but also believe the rainbow...


But, following your train of logic, for the rainbow to exist and therefore be believed, it must first exist as Skittles to be eaten by a pony, then defecated as a rainbow. This is clearly a logical fallacy, A.K.A. "Bullshit," because we all know ponies do not exist. That totally fucks up your train of causality there...


Also, I must refute [Csitri], because that statement is only partially correct. Yes, Bacon can solve anything... so can Kraft Macaroni and Cheese white cheddar flavor...


But *Alex Trebek petitions the judges* No, sorry, we cannot accept that answer... *BEEPBOOPBOOOOP* The correct answer we were looking for was Tits... Tits can solve anything. Flisky, you still have control of the topic. *Waves cue card*
2012-12-22 [Flisky]: Hypothetical ranting BS for 500.
2012-12-22 [Nekko fox]: Hypothetical Ranting BS for 500.


"What culture determined that, within our lifetimes, the world and its inhabitants would experience a cataclysmic or otherwise life-changing event of a profound nature?"
2012-12-22 [Flisky]: "What is every known culture in the world."
2012-12-22 [Nekko fox]: Incorrect, please form your response in the shape of a parabola.
2012-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *buzzes in*


Can I go to the restroom? I need to pee.
2012-12-22 [Csitri]: *giggles and throws her buzzer at [Flisky]* Catch!


Oh yes, and who are the Mayans? *tilts her tone and pitch to form a parabola* Ooh! I can speak whale!


*Alex Trebec* The Maya civilization reached its peak development from AD 250 to 900 and spanned Central America. Although their 'Long Count' calendar has received a disproportionate amount of press, the Mayan people formed a rich and advanced culture for its time and the Mayan descendents continue the traditions of their ancestors today.
2012-12-22 [0-Aki]: -Walks in with one eye open and throws a dollar down on the table- Coffee, black. o.- Zzz
2012-12-23 Ritori: I'm a dithering blow-hard and know-it-all. I have no friends, so I try to spout facts like a pretentious cock-gargler so people will think I'm smart and, by proxy, think I'm interesting enough to befriend.


*weeps*


Oh god, I'm so transparently pathetic it burns my lungs. or maybe it's the asbestos.
2012-12-23 Jesus: Oy, shut your cunt about Ritori.


*Beats Ritori with a buzzer that inexplicably flew across the room towards Flisky that was thrown by Ritori in order to defend Ritori's honor*


*confusion and panic ensues*


*ascends in a beam of holy light to chill with his dad*
2012-12-23 [Queen of Hearts]: ? Strange place to ask someone to check out
2012-12-24 [Sideways]: Failsauce. Did you know the "Mayan Prophecy" came true? Guess what the Long Count calander predicted would happen at it's end?


Absolutely nothing.


And look! Absa-fucking-lutely nothing happened! AMAZING!


I'll take "Ignorant, sensationalist dumbfucks" for a thousand, Alex.
2012-12-24 [Flisky]: My...that escalated quickly.
2012-12-24 [Csitri]: Wow. So it did, [Flisky]... Apparently some people don't have a similar sense of humor to me. Oh well.


Incidentally, Google is my best friend. I don't pretend to know everything - it was part of the Jeopardy joke.


*wanders off and goes back to studying for her final exams*
2012-12-24 [Sideways]: Lol. The surest sign of a narcissist is when someone thinks every comment is about them. Ritori could be a "ignorant, sensationalist dumbfuck" for all I know, but that comment was more directed towards people who hyped 2012 in the first place. And those assclowns at the "History" channel for getting lunatics who miraculously obtained doctorates (chiefly that one guy with the freaky hair and freakier name. What was it.... Geoerges Tsulakolos or something...)
2012-12-24 [Flisky]: Aliens.
2012-12-24 [Swollenfish]: Well well well. *munches some eggs*
2012-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: MY EGGS! Get out of my nest!!
2012-12-24 Lion slicer: I'm a pretentious knob-jockey with a hitherto unforeseen narcissistic attitude who thinks he needs to respond to everyone's answer with condescending, petty bullshit in order to facilitate the attention-whoring that is reticent in only the poorest dregs of internet culture.


Also, my father raped me as a child and I am irrepressibly attracted to smelly dicks and beatings with a leather belt and my asshole is so loose that I need a diaper to walk around.


Incidentally, scat and diapers are both fetishes of mine, 
2012-12-24 Lion slicer: Also, I want everyone to know that my mother was a drug-abusing pissant with the intelligence of a ravioli, and I have been sexually attracted to her hairy, unshaven armpits since I was a toddler.


Please feel pity for my shaken sanity and poor socialization skills. You see, being raised in a closet and fed a steady diet of my father's seminal fluid left me borderline retarded.


Potatoes.
2012-12-24 [Nekko fox]: *glances up from a moment from his Rip Van Winkle beard that he was growing while taking a nap*


Sure, orders go around back. Just stack them on the Pacos.


*goes back to his twenty year nap*
2012-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Son of bitch, that's my beard! Give it back!


*rips the beak off a screeching pelican and promptly places it on his head, fish and blood oozing from it and running down his corporate jogging suit with a bedazzled on Bob's Diner logo*


*returns to his place behind the register and resumes taking orders*


The fuck you want?


"A sandwich, please."


Fuck that shit, you want a goddamn milkshake.


"But I-"


MILKSHAKE. Next!


"Hi, I have a delivery here. Where do I drop off packages?"


How should I know? Next!


Hey, man. You should treat the customers better.


Who are you to judge me? You don't even have quotation marks around your sentences. You're a nobody!


No, Mort... I'm you.


No, it... it can't be... If you're me and you're there... then who's that me over there stealing from the register?


That's me.


But if that's you, then wh-


HEY! YOU TWO GET BACK TO WORK! NO DISSOCIATIVE EXISTENTIAL CRISES ON THE JOB!


*goes back to reading his newspaper*
2012-12-25 [Sideways]: *blinks* Does anyone know there is a Doppelganger present? I'm pretty sure there's a doppelgänger present. I smell butt-hurt and dripping animosty. Also, somebody here dropped their rejection letter for Junior Troll College. So watch out! It's rumored that the only way you can spot them is an italicized username. Bizarre behavior is not adequate proof, as this is Bob's Diner.
2012-12-25 [Swollenfish]: Oh, you want these eggs? WELL THEY'RE MY EGGS! YOU AND THE REST OF YOU CAN GO OUT BACK AND HAMMER EACH OTHERS FINGERS! *continues to munch eggs*
2012-12-26 [Nekko fox]: *Consumes all the eggs in a manner reminiscent of a vacuum cleaner, steals back his beard, and wears whatever Doppelgangers present as one would a nice jacket. There is beauty in that*
2012-12-27 [Swollenfish]: Excuse me! You can't just come in here and hoover up my eggs like some sort of... hoover!
2012-12-27 [Sideways]: * Hoovers [Swollenfish]'s eggs like a Dirt Devil, Dyson, and Bissel, as well as a Hoover. And Shop-Vac.*
2012-12-27 [Nekko fox]: I run this joint with very strict standards of quality, both in our dishes as well as our clientele, and I will enforce order.


*indicates the drooling masses sitting in squalor amongst the many burnt our bulbs. He swears when one of the bulbs flickers feebly to life and shots it out with a pellet gun*


There, that's more ambient.
2012-12-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *continues drooling as he chews a bulb*
2012-12-29 [Swollenfish]: *slumps at the table, spinning a light bulb absently on the surface* I miss my eggs.
2012-12-29 [Nekko fox]: * the lightbulb hatches like an egg, revealing a gross mockery of life*


* it is naturally assumed that Mort is the mother*
2012-12-29 [Swollenfish]: Sh... should I kill it?
2012-12-30 [Csitri]: Congratulations! *passes along little yellow booties, since the gender is as of yet unknown*
2012-12-30 [Nekko fox]: Mazeltov, I assume Sideways is the father.
2012-12-31 [Sideways]: Wait.... I demand a glass monstrosity gene test! There's no way I'm the father! Besides, I was terrifically drunk and Mort was wearing a lot of pink amd amazingly shiny lip gloss. It's not my fault!
2012-12-31 [Nekko fox]: *One of the Heathen Gods points accusingly at Swollenfish*


IT WAS YOU THAT CORRUPTED THE BOY, SODDER!
2012-12-31 [Swollenfish]: >.> I did nothing! Those people fell on the bullets and stab wounds!
2012-12-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes the stand, limping up to the front of the court room wearing arm and leg casts and a head bandage*


It's true, I saw him do it.


*returns to his seat, angering the judge, as the case is about child support and nobody even called him to the stand in the first place and nobody knows who he is*


*fist bumps the defense attorney*


Nailed it, bro.


*does shots off the defense table as the bailiff and security guards draw their weapons and start shouting*
2013-01-01 [Csitri]: *filches the judge's mallet and noms on the handle* omnomnom :3
2013-01-01 [Swollenfish]: I'm being stitched up! They fell! People fall on glass bottles to the face all the time!
2013-01-02 [Nekko fox]: OBJECTION! The bottle in question was minding its own business when it was roughly manhandled into position so that said people would fall on it, face-first!
2013-01-04 [Csitri]: My sword was minding its own business too, but you don't see it complaining. :P
2013-01-04 [Nekko fox]: PARTY TIME!


  

2013-01-04 [Sideways]:   
2013-01-05 [Nekko fox]:   



The aftermath of god's thoughtless gesture.
2013-01-05 [Sideways]: 
"Is that all you got, Yaweh? Omnipotent Diety??? More like
Omnipresent PUSSY!"
2013-01-05 [Swollenfish]: Children, please.


  

2013-01-20 [drakkar]:   


whats going on in this diner?
2013-01-20 [Flisky]: Not much. Not much at all.
2013-01-20 [Sideways]: True. All the snowbirds went home.
2013-01-20 [Susie-Q]: That and..... Nah I got nothin
2013-01-21 [Avaz]: Deliveries go around the back.
2013-01-21 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-01-21 [drakkar]: I'll take 3


thats the best i can do
2013-01-22 [Sideways]:   


The eye of robo-God? Gigantic robo-vagina? Black hole dispenser? Or your momma's starfish?


The answer tonight at 11
2013-01-22 [Avaz]: I think it's Ultron's robotic sphincter.
2013-01-23 [Sideways]: It's the large hadron collider. It is To the scale of your momma's starfish, however.
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
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2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: 
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: TWILIGHT SPARKLE:
My Little Pony, My Little Pony


BACKUP SINGERS:
Ah Ah Ah Ah... My Little Pony


TWILIGHT SPARKLE:
I used to wonder what friendship could be


BACKUP SINGERS:
My Little Pony


TWILIGHT SPARKLE:
Until you all shared its magic with me
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: RAINBOW DASH:
Big adventure


PINKIE PIE:
Tons of fun


RARITY:
A beautiful heart
Find More lyrics at www.sweetslyrics.com


APPLEJACK:
Faithful and strong


FLUTTERSHY:
Sharing kindness


ALL:
It's an easy feat!
And magic makes it all complete


You have My Little Pony.
Do you know you're all my very best friends?
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic: My Little Pony, My Little Pony


Isn't the world a lovely place


My Little Pony, My Little Pony


Everywhere you go, a smiling face


Running and skipping; merrily tripping


Watching the morning unfold


My Little Pony, My Little Pony


What does the future hold?


No sign of trouble in sight


My Little Pony, My Little Pony


May all your days be bright


May all your days be bright
2013-01-28 My Little Pony Friendship Is Magic:
I LOVE MY LITTLE PONY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!










That is all....
2013-01-28 [Susie-Q]: I love my little pony as well but that was like getting shot by a care bear. Please don't abuse the ponies
2013-01-28 [Kbird]: -___________________-
2013-01-28 [Nekko fox]: Pony abuse is the leading cause of eye-rainbows everywhere.
2013-01-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort sips his chocolate milk out of a martini glass through a twisty straw in a dignified manner*


I say!


*Mort sophisticatedly blows bubbles into his glass*
2013-01-28 [Susie-Q]: I think I choked on an eye rainbow just now. I don't think hospitals are equipped to treat pony OD's
2013-01-29 [Sheamus Finn]: There's only one way to treat Pony OD's....*sniff, sniff* Ya gotta put them down... *cocks shotgun*
2013-01-29 [Kbird]: or have them stop watching My little pony
2013-01-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-01-29 [Kbird]: *Facepalm*
2013-01-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-01-29 [Kbird]: O.O ohhhh
2013-01-29 [Avaz]: Is that a WH40K fan picture?
2013-01-29 [Nekko fox]: Yes.


  

2013-01-30 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-01-30 [Avaz]: I like how they designed the helmets so they're always like D:
2013-01-30 [Nekko fox]: Nothing says mass production quite like everything being the same.
2013-01-30 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-02-05 [Csitri]: Lol
2013-02-08 [Fayntlie McAbbre]: *facepalm* xD
2013-02-10 [Susie-Q]: *cough* D&D *cough* "what happened?"
2013-02-11 [Kbird]: YAY D&D!!!
2013-02-12 [Flisky]: ...I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT'S GOING ON!!! XD
2013-02-12 [Avaz]: Okay, Towelie.
2013-02-12 [kians mummy]:   , look at the top lol
2013-02-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort rustles*
2013-02-26 [Avaz]: It's a wild Mort there in the grass! Quick, catch it before it gets away!
2013-02-26 [Nekko fox]: OH NO! MORT'S JIMMIES!
2013-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Jimmy's Morts rustle*
2013-02-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Jimmy and Russel both look up from their plates at the bar*


Nothing to see here.


*they are blind and not amused*


Nothing to hear here.


*they are deaf and not amused*


*neither is aware of the others company and neither is easily amused*


*soon though, on a faithful trip to the bathroom, they would bump into one another and trip over Faith, the blind pastor selling bibles/erotic pop-up books/erotic pop-up bibles*
2013-02-27 [Nekko fox]: Pop-up Erotic bibles are in the back, between BDSM and Flagellation.


*Goes back to his How To Dominate Your Inner Submissive text book*
2013-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mecha Mort bursts in, roaring in a loud, mechanical voice, temporarily drowning out the quiet whirs and clicks of his intricate system of gears and pullies and sprocket based genitals*


*Mecha Mort sits down at the bar and takes a shot of oil*


Sorry, I just need to let off some steam...


*he opens his mighty steam valve, releasing a torrent of hot air into a passing man's face*


*the man melts from unrelated reasons*
2013-03-01 [Avaz]: *suddenly a band of bandits burst in the door, one of them holding a stolen Sheriff's badge, and they yell at Mecha Mort to surrender or they'll shoot*


*the melted man garbles something unintelligible from his puddle on the floor*
2013-03-01 [Sunrose]: this wiki sucks
2013-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mecha Mort activates his sigh sequence and, after a number of complicated processes and a gallon of fuel, Mort sighs lightly*


*the mechanical behemoth engages his thrusters*


*the thrusters sputter violently and cherish their new, diamond ring*
2013-03-01 [Avaz]: *the thrusters change their relationship status on facebook. It's not official until it's facebook-official.*
2013-03-01 [Sideways]: *Code Violation Violator Bot 5000 enters through unrelated blast hole in the diner wall, trampling mexicans while attempting to step over white people (except the Irish)* ATTENTION! THIS IS YOUR FINAL WARNING BEFORE AN ISSUE OF FELONY WARRANT!!! Mortimer--Pendergast YOU ARE BEING SERVED WITH four--hundred and--ninety seven HEALTH CODE VIOLATIONS. FAILURE TO COMPLY WILL RESULT IN A TARGETED DRONE STRIKE FROM THE UNITED STATES MILITARY.
2013-03-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mecha Mort turns 180 degrees on his rotator bar and faces his opponent*


CODE VIOLATION VIOLATOR BOT 5000, WE MEET AGAIN. YOU ARE IN VIOLATION OF BEING A BITCH AND WILL NOW BE SUBJECT TO A FINE... PIECE OF ASS.


*Mecha Mort launches his detachable buttloafs at the Code Violation Violator Bot, but they miss and blow up most of table seven. The occupants of table eight briefly look up from their soup at the chaos and destruction, only to ask for crackers*


TABLE EIGHT, YOU ARE IN VIOLATION OF BOB'S DINER CODE 412-C. YOUR BILL WILL BE CHARGED AN ADDITIONAL $0.25 FEE BECAUSE OF THIS MISCONDUCT. FURTHER RULE VIOLATIONS WILL RESULT IN MORE FEES AND A WRITTEN WARNING. HAVE A NICE DAY.


*Mecha Mort launches a missile wrapped in a bill at table eight and sits back down at the bar, taking another shot of oil, before striking up a conversation with the old lady sitting next to him*


So, you come here often? Whatchu drinking, girl? Barkeep! A shot of oil for my new friend here!


*the old lady simply sobs, probably tears of joy, as Mort jams the oil violently down her throat*
2013-03-01 [Sideways]: *The code violator fires a densely packed projectile made of fines and sexual harrassment suit subpeonas and Misty's Defamation of Whale Charactet supreme court summons at Mort, misses, and neatly punches a basketball shaped hole where the barkeeps pelvis formerly was*


Have a nice day! The mech bids farewell and turns the trampled mexicans into chili pulp on his way out*
2013-03-01 [Susie-Q]: Begins to feel remorse for the loss of the Mexicans but remembers her deployment to Texas for boarder patrol. She laughs at the remnants of the Irish, they opposed her ancestors' tribe. Fairly drunk off universe juice, as the bottles label claimed, feels the repercussions of the unknown beverage as TLC begins to play from seemingly nowhere. Rising from her stay she approaches the bar.


"do you have any copies of the newly released mlp comic? Im quite sure the toilet paper delivery boy was among the stampeded Mexicans and I need a substitute"
2013-03-04 [Pillowthief]: Dude. This place DOES suck. *High fives [Sunrose], nonchalantly, of course*
2013-03-04 [Susie-Q]: Shiva the pot goddess with her six arms rolls a joint that will end world sober-ness leading to the unifying all nation. This shall bring the end times that will become the rebirth of an evolved humanity
2013-03-04 [Nekko fox]: TOTALLY!


*high fives Pillowthief's face with sunrose*
2013-03-04 [Teufelsweib]: whoo! *Roses thief's five with a high sunpillow*
2013-03-04 [Avaz]: Roses Thief's Five is the house band. They play every Friday night from 8pm to 8:02pm.
2013-03-04 [Teufelsweib]: and after that take a 5 minute break that'll probably last until closing time
2013-03-04 [Avaz]: That's correct. After their incredible 2 minute tuning session, they make way for The Paculous Pacos. You might recognize them for their smash hit "Deliveries Go Around Back."
2013-03-05 [twitchboy]: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3wsPrNAye3o
2013-03-05 [Sunrose]: Wow, I didn't know [Pillowthief] was still active around here.. :P
2013-03-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course. Who did you think was dealing meth out back?
2013-03-05 [Sideways]: Meth? And not cocaine? I thought this was supposed to be a classy joint.
2013-03-05 [Nekko fox]: Speaking of joints.


*Passes Mort two pipes connected by a flexible, movable section in the middle*
2013-03-05 [kians mummy]:   
2013-03-05 [Nekko fox]: Grandma is so edgy, readin' books an' shit.
2013-03-05 [kians mummy]: Yeah even her dog is like:



2013-03-05 [Sideways]: Sammie, Sammie... I dont think Nekko was handing over marijuana paraphenalia. My money is on some sort of double ended dildo.


But you really can make a bong out of anything.... o-o;
2013-03-05 [Nekko fox]: including double-ended dildos, or dragon dildos too. Ask the black people. They stole it.
2013-03-05 [Sideways]: Now youre just lazy. Nekko, the only thing I hate more than niggers is a lazy racist. You a shitty, useless racist who points out useless racist stuff. Nobodah care if they stole yer plastic homo-robo dick. Damn queers. You can stert whinin' at me when them niggers look sideways at a white womin.
2013-03-05 [kians mummy]: Do you know, one spliff made wrong could kill you, all it takes is rat poisoning, or some drugg mad fuck with aids cumming in the bag, lol
2013-03-05 [Nekko fox]: Racism? No, I'm talking about the species, the Blacks. Gelatinous, oozing creatures of pure void who steal what they wish. That's specist, not racist.
2013-03-05 [Teufelsweib]: if you got rat poisoning in, or a drug mad fuck with aids cums in your jar of peanut butter you're fucked as well
2013-03-05 [kians mummy]: Peaunut butter jelly tots lol
2013-03-05 [Sideways]: Glack geletin with cognitive reason? Thats not specisist, thats fantasticalbullshitist. And possibly elitist.
2013-03-05 [Susie-Q]: Who can argue with that oh wait this is the internet how silly of me
2013-03-06 [Mortified Penguin]: This isn't the internet, this is ob's Diner. *glances outside at the sign near the street, which is now also missing the 'n'*


Here at ob's Di er, we don't argue with one another. We're a big, happy family. Isn't that right, Paco?


*Paco says no*


See? Paco says yes. Anyway, I have a funny joke to tell Paco in the other room...


*drags Paco away by his hair and grabs a crowbar off the weapon rack*
2013-03-07 [Nekko fox]: * Smiles dreamily at the dull, wet thwacks that soon issue from the other room, and cut-short screaming*


Ah, I love that joke. I tell it to my children all the time.


*goes over the section of the newspaper labeled 'Missing Children'*


Ah, Timothy got his picture in the paper today! I'm so proud.


*muffled weeping can be heard from his desk drawers*
2013-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort and Paco both come back in, laughing heartily*


"So that's why the chicken crossed the road!"


What the FUCK are you talking about, Paco?! That joke was about the stock market. Anyway, take this crowbar out to the parking lot and beat cars with it until they're fixed. Here at ob's Di er, we take care of our customers.


Anyway, I'm gonna go beat off furiously. *grabs the 'Missing Children' section and heads off to the bathroom*
2013-03-07 [Nekko fox]: *Smiles at the dull, wet thwacks now issuing from the bathroom, and the loud crack of glass from the parking lot*


Ah, I love those jokes too. I tell them to my...


Wait...


*Looks around for his Missing Children section and begins swearing*
2013-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort and the Missing Children section come back in, laughing heartily*


"Rustle rustle."


Are you getting an attitude?!


"Rustle."


*starts beating the paper furiously*
2013-03-07 [Pillowthief]: Yeah, took a bit of a break. Been stalking Mort and Nekko on the Book of Face.
2013-03-07 [Mortified Penguin]: As the founder of SHU, I take offense to this.
2013-03-08 [Nekko fox]: As the founder of Shoes, I take offense to your offense.
2013-03-08 [Mortified Penguin]: As the founder of Shows, I take a fence to your offense at my offense.


Now let us fence. *draws his blade and cuts up a fence offensively*
2013-03-08 [Nekko fox]: As the founder of Shaws, I take a thicket to your fence.


TREE POWERS, ACTIVATE.


  

2013-03-10 [Pillowthief]:   
2013-03-10 [Nekko fox]: Captain Planet, LEADER OF CP!


  

2013-03-10 [Sideways]: American Gulf Coast, raped by BP


  

2013-03-11 [Nekko fox]: Pangea, BC, raped by early hominids.


  

2013-03-11 [Sideways]: You ass, pangea existed before fucking dinosaurs. Or mammals. Soooo, you've been demoted. High brow, high class troll [Nekko fox], I hereby re-rank you Common Rabble Troll [Nekko fox]. Shame on you. When you want your rainbow poptart cat badge back, find a legitimate, backhanded, meta/satyrical/sarcastic photo retort.


2013-03-11 [Sideways]: That didnt even rhyme correctly. Goddamn amateurs.
2013-03-11 [Nekko fox]:   




Hold on, let me check something.


*checks under the desk where he keeps the little girls*


Nope, no fucks here. Try again next Tuesday, we have a shipment that goes around back. Also, because you're the mascot's replacement (sorry Paco), you're demoted to...well ,whatever is below Paco (sorry Paco).


*Paco scowls angrily, feeling as if his job may be threatened. If an unpaid internship like he has is a job*
2013-03-11 [Nekko fox]:   



Also, last I checked, Charon wears Button's wig, so your argument with the Management is irrelevant. It's also illogical, trying to use things like history, science, or actual LOGIC (of all things!) in a place like Bob'd Diner and Hall of Academia.


Just ask Mort. He understands how things don't work around here.


*the lights go off and gravity becomes optional in several places in the diner*
2013-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, things don't work around here. ESPECIALLY YOU, [Sakamoto The Contractor]!! Get back to work!


I DON'T CARE WHAT LOCATION YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO WORK AT, THAT'S NO EXCUSE FOR LAZINESS.


*goes back to reading his tiger*
2013-03-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, hey. A free spaying coupon for the local vet! *circles an ad as the tiger thrashes about violently*
2013-03-11 [Sideways]: Eh, fuck it, here's your badge back.


And also, for using the "Catgirl Argument" (Coined from the addage "Everytime you question physics as portrayed in Anime, God kills a Catgirl) I award you the "Don't question me, motherfucker, I'll make God kill everybody" badge. Enjoy!



Its basically that with a pink ribbon.
2013-03-25 [American Revolutionary]: *floats about in the lack of gravity* well this is soviet experiment gone wrong
2013-03-25 [twitchboy]: *floats through the room reading a newspaper without pants* i cant even shit in this places without the laws physics collapsing
2013-03-25 [American Revolutionary]: *sings the russian national anthem while floating*
2013-03-26 [Nekko fox]: *Hits the Gravity switch from Off to On*


*everything floats higher*


Fucking cheap science...
2013-03-30 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: Hey y'all
2013-03-31 [American Revolutionary]: *flips upside down in mid air* whoa..this like armageddon movie..russian space station
2013-04-05 [Pillowthief]: Wait, you're American now? Make up your mind!
2013-04-05 [Sideways]: Che is fake. o-o
2013-04-05 [Sideways]: Awww man... I dont even want to think about the Friscal Report coming up. Its gonna be bad... SO! Roger Ebert's still warm corpse informed me we should start terrorizing the Diner using only one word per post. This should effectively increase comment numbers by like.... I dunno, 20% Wait, hold on, my seance channeler is getting another message....


Okay! So the worm infested, mostly picked clean bones of Gene Siskal inform me that we should divert some of the crack and meth profits to teaching "How to form a semi-coherent sentance" seminars twice a week. Combined with single word comments, teaching Paco how to say something other than "Can I go home?" Or "MORPHINE!!!" As well as teaching Diner savages how to speak should solve our Friscal Biff Crises.


And Roeper just faxed to say we should replace Kareoke Night with Gay Swinger's Night. All good suggestions, I think.
2013-04-05 [Avaz]: Yes.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: I.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Agree.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: There.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Is.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: No.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Way.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: This.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Could.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Be.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]: Annoying.
2013-04-05 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-04-06 [Sideways]: O~O best picture ever!
2013-04-20 [SoulOfSet]: scurry
2013-04-20 [twitchboy]:   
2013-04-20 [Sideways]: 



"I wondered what would break first... your kayfabe, or your body...."
2013-04-23 [Nekko fox]:


"His body..."




  

2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: Jesus, no comments for a month? What, did we run out of bacon or something?
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: I brought bacon...
2013-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Ever since [Stephen] drowned in the soup, things just haven't been the same.


*a ghost slowly rises from the soup*


GET BACK IN THERE.


*grabs the ghost and starts punching it back down into the soup*
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: *sits in the soup* I've been needing to relieve myself... take the bacon before I muck it
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: *takes the bacon and throws it in the kitchen*


*ungodly noises come from in there*


Stop your damn complaining and throw it in the pasta, mother fucker!
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: Mmmm... soup's done
2013-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *revs up his tractor and drives out the front wall, turning many customers into bales of hay on his way out*


CuteSalamander and Tsunami. You hold down the fort while I'm away. I'm going to threaten more people to eat at B's D.


*the fort quietly slinks away, having not been held down like I JUST TOLD YOU TO GODDAMMIT*
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: hi?
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: Christ-alive!
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: Aw shit, there goes the food. What the shit, guys. He Ves, how's it hangin?
2013-05-15 [Avaz]: Limp and slightly angled left.
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: I'm sorry was someone offended?? Its just a name. *looks in pants* Don't have one... so it ain't lol Its alright. :P I'm just fine.
2013-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *drives his steamroller back in through the wall, turning many bales of hay into customers on his way in*


Mine is hanging in the cupboard by the spices.
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: *climbs out of the soup* Mine's soupy
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: Anyways....
2013-05-15 [Teufelsweib]: hurh
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: Oh god, I just saw a woman pooping >_<
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: Eww.... *shuts eyes and shakes head* You don't have to share that with us you know... O.o'
2013-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Me too. Damn camera wouldn't focus right though, so I have to go back later and try to get a better shot.
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: I want to cry -____-
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: Whelp, at least you weren't locked in a bathroom with a psycho crack addict...


I mean... the woman's bathroom is closed for cleaning.
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: Can I go in there and clean it with my tears?
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: huh? O.o' *sits at a table while sipping coffee* Whats good to eat here?
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: Try the soup.


I'mma go bake myself out on the porch.


Consider it frying using cedar wood.
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: What kind of soup is it? Chicken rice? Beef Barley?
2013-05-15 [Celtore]: Comment :-P
2013-05-15 [CuteCommander]: Yummy comment soup
2013-05-15 [Avaz]: It's cool, you guys. I had a camera installed inside every toilet bowl.
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: HAH. My sun went away, so I'm still raw. Oh well.
2013-05-15 [Vessel_4_Christ]: eww... XP
2013-05-15 [Goma]: MOAR COMMENTS
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Meh
2013-05-15 [Deus Ex Taco]: I feel like I should be confused, yet for some reason, I'm not.
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: I gave up on trying to understand Bob's diner and now I just go with whatever is going on or I just ignore it
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: It's not that hard to understand. Unless someone starts speaking Russian, then we all get confused.
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: True
2013-05-15 [Avaz]: Tolstoy tchaikovsky da borat.
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: See? Confused as fuck right now.
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Yep I'm confused to
2013-05-15 [Avaz]: Gorbachev rasputin kalashnikov! :(
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: ??? In english please
2013-05-15 [Avaz]: Vladimir ivan?
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: Whaaaaaa?
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: That one sounds familiar
2013-05-15 [Avaz]: OLGA! >:O
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: *goes in the corner and cries and eats limoncello*
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Ok I'm lost again*hangs head in shame*
2013-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: VODKA.
2013-05-15 [XxTsomexX]: THAT ONE I KNOW!
2013-05-15 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Me to and I don't drink
2013-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: But... but you stole my Scotch...
2013-05-16 [Koho Ai]: Kalashnikov = pewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpewpew
2013-05-16 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: No I didn't. You left it on that table over there, Mort*points at a random table*
2013-05-16 [~SASSY~]: Hmmm....
2013-05-16 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: O.o
2013-05-16 [Teufelsweib]: Fyodor Dostoevsky? Chekhov, tsarskoye putin!
2013-05-16 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Ugh not again with the Russian
2013-05-16 [Teufelsweib]: njetnjetnjetnjetnjet
2013-05-16 [Jino "ChaoS" Silver_flamE]: Well, now... I don't remember eating here before...
2013-05-16 [CuteCommander]: Anyone got any tasty sausage for my breakfast?
2013-05-16 [Teufelsweib]: you mean morning wood?
2013-05-16 [CuteCommander]: I'll take it if it's tasty. On a side note, anyone up for a sci-fi RP? I just finished building one
2013-05-16 [Teufelsweib]: I don't like sci-fi or fantasy
2013-05-16 [CuteCommander]: Do you like sausage?
2013-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm a vegan myself. Meat is murder.


*goes back to casually stirring the soup, occasionally having to smash a desperately grasping hand back down into the pot with the ladle*
2013-05-16 [Teufelsweib]: I like a nice, fat, juicy sausage :F
2013-05-16 [Avaz]: Oh, come on, vorkje! That one has TWSS written all over it. And you know it full well too, I bet! ^_^
2013-05-16 [Teufelsweib]: especially when you stick the sausage in your mouth and the juice runs all over your chin :F
2013-05-16 [CuteCommander]: Sausagey chin... nom nom
2013-05-16 [Avaz]: *drool* :F
2013-05-17 [XxTsomexX]: Steaks, man. I'd eat them everyday. Raw or rare, I don't care.
2013-05-17 [CuteCommander]: Would you eat them out my underwear?
2013-05-17 [XxTsomexX]: Thaat I draw the line. I have no idea where your underwear has been if you're willing to put steak in them.
2013-05-17 [CuteCommander]: Round mah balls ^_^
2013-05-17 [XxTsomexX]: There might be hair involved... there is already enough hair in the salad here at the Diner.
2013-05-17 [Avaz]: That's what manscaping and a razor is for.
2013-05-17 [CuteCommander]: You keep them blades away from my mighty balls bush
2013-05-17 [Avaz]: Sorry, I forgot you dip your mighty balls bush into the soup of the day to give it that extra zing. And free floss.
2013-05-17 [XxTsomexX]: Mmm.. hairy soup and salad...
2013-05-17 [XxTsomexX]: Sounds like Olive Garden
2013-05-17 [CuteCommander]: *sits in the soup* I love olives. But I hate gardens. Then again, I do like soup. And sausage
2013-05-17 [Vessel_4_Christ]: Olive Garden is really good. :) Got any of their breadsticks here?
2013-05-17 [Susie-Q]: Yeah, but you might be displeased with the garlic dip. It's made using baby's blood and the tears of tape victims. It's the same recipe taco Mac uses
2013-05-17 [CuteCommander]: Tape victims? Have they had tapeworms? Or are they still having to use cassette players?
2013-05-18 [CuteCommander]: Oh the humanity! *sobs into the soup*
2013-05-18 [Susie-Q]: Actually it's victims of the beta max bandit. Before his down fall when he was re-wound by spider, the man with eight dicks
2013-05-18 [Susie-Q]: Precisely. Only he had the power to rewind the beta max bandit, after he unlocked the door to his mind.
2013-05-18 [XxTsomexX]: Octadick and Octomom all together, making octobabies with octolegs... MORE LEGS FOR THE LEG SANDWICHES. Frogs legs, babies legs, hell. They all taste the same, don't they?
2013-05-18 [Susie-Q]: Well, yeah, with a little soy sauce
2013-05-18 [CuteCommander]: I own a cocktopus
2013-05-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-05-18 [Vessel_4_Christ]: yikes.... *leaves*
2013-05-18 [Nekko fox]: everyone wants a cocktapoodle. Mort has several.
2013-05-18 [Nekko fox]: I thought it was the inherent nature of the people to commit to incestuous relationships...
2013-05-18 [Susie-Q]: No that's where west boroughs come from.
2013-05-18 [Nekko fox]: You mean West Side Story.
2013-05-18 [CuteCommander]: I deny these allegations regarding incest with my cocktopus
2013-05-18 [Susie-Q]: Objection, relevance? The second monocle clearly clarifies the clarity of the unclear times of in this the year of our lord 1992, where in violent video games are creating a positive out look for our youth, teaching them that any situation can solved using excessive force and rock hard and and pecks. Wait...sorry I thought this was the columbine trial. I repeal my statement, you honor, people of the jury.
2013-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *The people of the jury mutter furiously and hold up signs marked with scores from 1 through 10. None go higher than the letter Y or a purple square*
2013-05-19 [Susie-Q]: It's a good thing im not licensed or id be at risk for losing it. I should probably just stick selling mescaline and dimethyltriptamine
2013-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *looks up from his bowl of mescaline, sprinkled with dimethyltryptamine, eyes dilated*


The sky is singing to me the song of its people
2013-05-19 [CuteCommander]: *tastes the soup* Needs more ball dipping
2013-05-19 [Nekko fox]: *balls try to dance across the floor. Tripping ensues, despite the lack of feet, and then go rolling about on the floor instead. The jury scores them a ten*
2013-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *the jury adjourns for recess*


*the jury rushes outside to play on the playground*


*one of the jury members runs up crying and says that Tommy pushed him off the monkey bars*


DAMMIT, TOMMY, I WARNED YOU ABOUT THIS SHIT.


*starts mercilessly flogging Tommy with an extension cord*
2013-05-19 [Nekko fox]: Mort! Enough!


You know we've upgraded to coathangers and radio antennas.


*Begins giving the jury its preliminary beating before returning to court*
2013-05-19 [CuteCommander]: *begins eyeing up the jury with a sexual leer*
2013-05-19 [Susie-Q]: *drags Tommy inside while the jury is distracted by Cutes xray vision and places him on trial for forcing mort to unplug the vibrating court benches in order to beat Tommy senseless. The hangars and antennas are inadmissible as they were not labeled as evidence before the trial began*
2013-05-19 [Susie-Q]: Plus they are donations for the local abortion clinic.
2013-05-19 [Stephen]: I'm only here because of .
2013-05-20 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-05-20 [Susie-Q]: Good show old bean *an audience of well to do ladies and gentlemen applaud valiantly, but sensibly, as they care to not wrinkle the fine clothing that adorns their bodies. *
2013-05-20 [Nekko fox]: How very proper.


*sips his diesel fuel and snacks on the rear axle of a young, well-cooked Prius*
2013-05-20 [CuteCommander]: *pours the soup on the jury* Soup's up!
2013-05-20 [Nekko fox]: *the judge pounds his gavel. People watch, video tape, and take saucy pictures of the pounding the judge gives his gavel*


*No one notices the soup*
2013-05-21 [Sideways]: *Sits on the prosecution desk, chin propped up, looking glum. A sign marked EXHIBIT 4b hung around my neck.* hey, is that [Stephen] guy being molested?


*gets whacked in the back of the head by the DA*


Stop talking! Youre an inanimate object, fer fuck's sakes.
2013-05-22 [Nekko fox]: *Watches as Deviant Art viciously beats the inanimate objects that are serving as exhibits but are displaying a surprising amount of diction*


*Tries to post on the DA and gets banned for irrelevant reasons*
2013-05-22 [CuteCommander]: *starts feeding soup to Deviant Art, jamming the servers and flooding the forums*
2013-05-22 [Sideways]: *looks behind himself, sees the District Attorney has morphed into an undulating pile of cartoon pony porn and fake DragonballZ sequels*
IIIIIIEEEEEEEAHHHHHHHHfuckdiszhitIREJECT!



2013-05-22 [No.]: *holds a humanist, ritualist, pony-ist service for the slain ponies. Honors with grass and hay*


Kono tabi wa goshuushousama de gozaimasu. *Bow*
2013-05-22 [Nekko fox]: * the congregation of samurai and ninja glance at one another, wondering why [No.] is saying 'Behold the soup of the Orange breakfast!' and throwing hay and grass around*
2013-05-22 [CuteCommander]: *eyes up some lounging dragons and their balls*
2013-05-22 [No.]: *samurai and ninja shrug and decide upon joining in the fun - frolicking and mayhem ensues*
2013-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *pirates burst onto the scene!*


*pirates don't get involved in any action*


*pirates simply drink at the bar and enjoy having scurvy, a result of not having enough vitamin C, one of the many vitamins available in Bob's Orange Breakfast Soup™!*


WARNING: Bob's Orange Breakfast Soup™ does not contain any actual vitamin C, but rather Vitamin U™, which is like a sideways Vitamin C! But not really. Vitamin U™ contains trace amounts of Uranium, what with it being composed of 100% Uranium. Vitamin U™ will probably cause death. Or super powers! One or the other. Most likely death though. Bob's Orange Breakfast Soup™, Vitamin U™, super powers, death, and the letter 'U' all Copyright © 2013 Bob's Family Corporate Empire and Charity. All rights reserved. Lefts too.
2013-05-22 [No.]: I hope there's vitamin D...I could do with a bit of that.
2013-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: She wants the D!
2013-05-22 [No.]: hahaaa!
2013-05-22 [No.]: Mr Bean is in firm agreement, Mr B and Me are in need , as the founder of this fine establishment it is your duty to provide.   
2013-05-22 [Sideways]:   
2013-05-23 [CuteCommander]: I have two Ds, an A, and a bag of Cs.
2013-05-23 [No.]: hehe you've got double D's ^__^


(  .  )(  .  )
2013-05-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I SAY! *violently, yet dignifiedly, expectorates his crumpet into a doily he was using as a napkin*


That's just SICK. That kind of perverted filth is not welcome here in Bob's Diner! This is a classy, family restaurant! Please take your vulgarities elsewhere!


*Tiny Tim looks up from the sweater he was knitting*


I SAID ELSEWHERE.


*Tiny Tim runs out crying*


*resumes crotch thrusting into table 4's salad as it screams and insists it isn't a salad, but just a guy that stopped by to ask for directions*


Clever salad, I'm not falling for your ruse.


*thrusts harder*
2013-05-23 [CuteCommander]: I will join you! *molests the salad with 2 Ds*
2013-05-23 [CuteCommander]: *loses my A, as well as all bowel control*
2013-05-23 [Avaz]: *CuteCommander's bowel control was found hiding in a nearby hedge. It was fornicating with someone's marbles*
2013-05-23 [Nekko fox]: My marbles!


wait...marbles?


IT HAD BABIES!


*takes pictures of the baby marbles as they are fornicated by the bowel control*


*posts on Myspace*


*No one is there anymore*
2013-05-24 [Unicornthryth]: yes yes
2013-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Tom thinks about logging into his Myspace, but then doesn't*
2013-05-25 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: lol wow
2013-05-25 [Sideways]:   
  

  


2013-05-25 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-05-25 [Nekko fox]: Big Mac would be proud.
2013-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Whopper, however, would be deeply ashamed.
2013-05-25 [Susie-Q]: Baconator mocks both stallions as he continues molesting little redheaded girls with pigtails
2013-05-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Super Deluxe Double Bacon Thickburger lustfully eyes a little butch looking girl with purple hair and licks his chops*
2013-05-26 [Nekko fox]: Now Now SDDBT, quit eyeing our chimpanzee, it took hours to dye its hair purple.


*goes back to preparing the orangutan for supper*
2013-05-28 [CuteCommander]: Can I get a SSDD?
2013-05-28 [Teufelsweib]: *gives you herpes* wait, you did say STD right?
2013-05-28 [CuteCommander]: It'll do. *spreads the herpes on crackers and munches them down*
2013-05-28 [Nekko fox]: *Spreads around glitter, because it's the Herpes of art supplies*
2013-05-28 [CuteCommander]: Get that filthy glitter away from me!
2013-05-28 [Avaz]: Dammit, those orangutan toenails were supposed to go into the Soup of the Day.
2013-05-28 [Avaz]: Fine. I guess the chef will have to substitute flaming fart for princess vomit juice this time.
2013-05-28 [Sideways]: Go masturbate to the garbage pail kids, or something. Weirdos!
2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *Masturbates into a garbage pail full of kids*


Hm?
2013-05-29 [Sideways]: That. That I'll settle for.


*the judge dismisses the case and awards Exhibit 4b a garbage pail of sexualy assaulted children.*


DAMN YOU, MINDTAKERRRR!
2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]: *Mind Taker runs sobbing out of the room. He didn't do anything wrong, he was just trying to be nice to everyone*
2013-05-29 [CuteCommander]: *puts on Mind Taker's hat* I am now Tind Maker!!
2013-05-29 [CuteCommander]: That'll cost you 50 squid
2013-05-29 [Avaz]: 50 squid? I only have octopus and mollusk money.
2013-05-29 [CuteCommander]: Not good enough, I only trade in squid and flounder
2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-05-29 [XxTsomexX]: Mmmm... is it Pornography sandwich Wednesday?
2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]: At least it's not as bad as the picture I commissioned of Moot fist-fucking OP.
2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]: Who says I can't enjoy a cuddle while posting cartoons fist-fucking one another?


I can multitask
2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]:

2013-05-29 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-05-30 [CuteCommander]:   
2013-05-30 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-05-30 [CuteCommander]: Brilliant. This has now become a gif page
2013-05-30 [Vessel_4_Christ]: IMG:http://imgfave.com/view/3600927
2013-05-30 [Vessel_4_Christ]: http://imgfave.com/view/3600927
2013-05-30 [CuteCommander]:   
2013-05-30 [kians mummy]: like a Chinese man running from Godzilla lol
2013-05-31 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-05-31 [Nekko fox]: NAILED IT



2013-05-31 [CuteCommander]: I have one of those...
2013-05-31 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-05-31 [Sideways]:   
2013-06-01 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-01 [Sideways]:   
2013-06-01 [Sideways]: 
2013-06-01 [Mortified Penguin]: BISEXUAL.
2013-06-01 [Sideways]: SEMANTICS! And also semitics. You say jewmato, I say christkillermahto. Apples and Apples. No oranges. Fuck those pinko commie oranges. Crayola should sue them.
2013-06-01 [Nekko fox]: What about legumes? WHAT ABOUT LEGUMES?!



2013-06-01 [Nuktae-tal]: Commenting here because comments need to happen at all times for the diner of bob to prosper.
2013-06-02 [Nekko fox]: Funny, your mother needs something to prosper...


*Holds up his punch card*


She even gives repeat customers discounts!


2013-06-02 [CuteCommander]: Don't you smack talk his mum! It's much more effective to kick talk...
2013-06-02 [Nekko fox]: *Kicks Nuktae-Tal's comment to support a slanderous comment, thus in turn increasing the comments count and bolstering his views*


*He kicks a punch card*


*kicking begins to spread to other things that need to be kicked*
2013-06-03 [Nuktae-tal]: *helps with the kicking of things that need kicked. like butts*
2013-06-04 [CuteCommander]: Don't kick my dick-butt -_-
2013-06-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-06-06 [Vessel_4_Christ]: http://imgfave.com/view/3490437
2013-06-06 [Nekko fox]: I wish you would post the gif instead of a link.
2013-06-06 [Vessel_4_Christ]: Whats the code to do that with? I can do it on my page but imgfave.com wont let me do it on here.
2013-06-06 [Nekko fox]: I'm on it.


  

2013-06-06 [Nekko fox]: Save picture, upload image, click meme arrow, do not pass go, offend Misty, beat Paco, give mort a hand job and call it a day.


Now you know.
2013-06-06 [Vessel_4_Christ]: Can't do that. I am on a school computer. Thanks anyways
2013-06-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-06-06 [Vessel_4_Christ]:   
2013-06-06 [Vessel_4_Christ]:   
2013-06-06 [CuteCommander]: I just asked for ketchup with my fries...



2013-06-06 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-06-06 [Vessel_4_Christ]: 
2013-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm at work, so these are the only available gifs I can find on my computer:


  



  



  



  

2013-06-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Good stuff. Goooood stuff.
2013-06-06 [Nuktae-tal]: sssooo freaking funny!!!!!!! stomach hurts!
2013-06-07 [Nekko fox]: OH MY GOD MORT! YOU ARE THE GOD-KING OF THE INTERNET!










  







HAVE INTERNET MONEYZ!






  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  
  

  

  

  




  










2013-06-07 [CuteCommander]: Can I pay in faeces?
2013-06-07 [Nekko fox]: Only if you've had a standing checking account with Faeces International for sixteen years, held a minimum balance of 45k constantly and without pause, are capable of reverse-yodeling, and hold the Faeces Platinum Card.


Our records show none of the previous criteria has yet been met.
2013-06-07 [Avaz]: Shit is not a currency. At least, I'm pretty sure it's not. ...Is it? O_o
2013-06-07 [Vessel_4_Christ]: 
2013-06-07 [Nekko fox]: Of course it is.



2013-06-07 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-07 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm curious is Faeces like fairy feces or special regular feces?
2013-06-08 [Nekko fox]: It's your a pretty standard shitty concept.
2013-06-08 [Sideways]: The prettiest girls taste like cupcakes.
2013-06-09 [Nekko fox]: The prettiest cupcakes taste like girls made of cupcakes.
2013-06-09 [Sideways]: 
2013-06-09 [foxyvixen17]: wow
2013-06-10 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-10 [Vessel_4_Christ]: 
2013-06-11 [Nuktae-tal]: high five kitty. It's called a low five moron. Tch humans.
2013-06-11 [XxTsomexX]: 
2013-06-11 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-11 [Vessel_4_Christ]: 
2013-06-11 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-11 [Susie-Q]: whoa, i thought that peyote wasn't supposed to kick in for another 20 minutes. That deer is crazy! Super robot knight Santa, mind blown.
2013-06-12 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-13 [foxyvixen17]: EEEK
2013-06-13 [Nekko fox]: Mort would be proud. Of everything.
2013-06-13 [Sideways]: 
2013-06-13 [Nekko fox]:             |--------------^



2013-06-14 [Nekko fox]: How about...




AMERICAN PIZZA?!



2013-06-14 [Sheamus Finn]: 
2013-06-14 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-15 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-16 [Nekko fox]: 


My gif is better.
2013-06-16 [Stephen]: *insert comment here* :3
2013-06-17 [Nekko fox]: Obviously mine is better cuz it moves.



2013-06-17 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-17 [Nekko fox]: Look at the superior artistry of that gif! THERE IS NO DENYING IT.
2013-06-17 [CuteCommander]: Looks like me attempting to empty my bowels
2013-06-17 [Sideways]: That's one retarded horse.
2013-06-17 [Nekko fox]: Of course. That's the beauty. You never suspect Retard Horse!
2013-06-17 [Nuktae-tal]: I have no Gif ability... so I will just sit here and creep on yours.
2013-06-17 [Avaz]: Creeper be creepin'.
2013-06-17 [Nuktae-tal]: and I'm good at it too! I do it at work all the time just to get some practice in.
2013-06-18 [Nekko fox]: and explode like other creepers?
2013-06-18 [Avaz]: I don't see why not.
2013-06-19 [Nekko fox]: HUZZAH!
2013-06-19 [Nuktae-tal]: I tend to not explode sadly... I've even tried!
2013-06-19 [Avaz]: Too lazy to generate the meme.




I don't always explode

But when I do, I make sure it's explosive diarrhea.
2013-06-20 [Nekko fox]: When in doubt, make it explode.


With diarrhea.
2013-06-22 [Nuktae-tal]: or vomit.
2013-06-22 [Nekko fox]: Or both.
2013-06-22 [Nuktae-tal]: ooh both is good.
2013-06-23 [Nekko fox]: Terrifying, and good.
2013-06-23 [CuteCommander]: I am made to remember this little fella:



2013-06-23 [Nekko fox]: Pity that was one of the only good episodes in the later seasons. Comedy Central didn't have the budget that Fox did for making Futurama hilarious. They essentially turned the majority of Futurama into 'Filler' episodes.



2013-06-25 [CuteCommander]: And now it's been cancelled AGAIN! D:
2013-06-25 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-26 [Nuktae-tal]: I never watched either. So I have no idea what you guys are talking about! tee hee hee
2013-06-27 [Nekko fox]: 
2013-06-28 [Nuktae-tal]: oh but I do! I didn't have cable or anything.
2013-06-29 [Nekko fox]: the horror!



2013-06-30 [Nuktae-tal]: yes I suppose, But I was a wild child anyway running through the woods and climbing trees and building forts and things.
2013-07-01 [CuteCommander]: I was a feral child, and I still remember Ren & Stimpy :D
2013-07-01 [Nekko fox]: I was never a child. I have been an adult my entire life. For thousands of lifetimes, no less. I watch the world's panorama unfold, change, and die away with the blink of eons. Seasons pass in a heartbeat, generations growing and dying the span of a breath, civilizations growing and collapsing with terrifying frequency. I am timeless, and I have watched the moon distance itself, the oceans rise, icebergs melt, rocks buffeted to pebbles, the grand canyon form...




All this time, and I still can't get my DVR to record I Love Lucy.
2013-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from deleting all the I Love Lucy's on the DVR and replacing them with shows about hunting Bigfoot*
2013-07-02 [CuteCommander]: Lucy knows what you did:



2013-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Gimme back my diamonds and stop being airborne! *uses a broom to swat at Lucy in the sky with my diamonds*
2013-07-02 [Nekko fox]: *Swats Mort for using Paco's broom without permission*


That's his livelihood damn it!
2013-07-02 [Mortified Penguin]: It's fine, I traded him a shovel for it.


*Paco sadly sweeps the floor with a shovel that was unceremoniously hot glued to his hands*


See? It's fine.
2013-07-03 [Nekko fox]: Bitch, do you think we can afford HOT glue?!


*attaches the shovel to Paco's hands via cold fusion, because hot fusion is expensive*


Better.
2013-07-03 [foxyvixen17]: *just sits an watches the choas while drinking cherry vodka mixed in monster*
2013-07-03 [Sideways]: Whats a Cho-Ass? Is that like a kind of Thai porn?
2013-07-03 [Avaz]: Kind of. It's actually Margaret Cho's ass.
Show content
2013-07-03 [Nekko fox]:   


What about dat ass?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Ke4r_8r9ww
2013-07-04 [CuteCommander]: How about a woman made of ass?


  

2013-07-04 [Teufelsweib]: aww yiss
2013-07-04 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-07-08 [Nuktae-tal]: wow...
2013-07-08 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-07-08 [Nuktae-tal]: lol too funny!
2013-07-08 [Nekko fox]: You know me, I'm hilarious.


Right Paco?


*An electric surge arcs into the tiny Mexican's body, eliciting a yelp and awkward, forced laughter along with the pungent odor of old beans*
2013-07-08 [Nuktae-tal]: poor Paco have some water whoops! *trips and pours water over Mexican getting electrocuted.*
2013-07-08 [SoulOfSet]: Lol the hell?
2013-07-08 [Nekko fox]: *watches as Paco seizures violently, knocking over patron's food and children's high chairs*


*People get angry*


*gorillas are called in to quell the impending riot*
2013-07-08 [CuteCommander]: MMMmmmmm - robo booty. I'll tap that *taps robot's booty with a paddle*


*pauses*


*taps Paco's electrified booty with a flyswatter*
2013-07-08 [Nekko fox]: *Watches as CuteCommander is electrocuted*


Am I going to have to pay more for the electricity?


Because I don't want to.


*He steps out into the alley and beats up the neighboring establishment's owner, whom he has illegally tapped his electricity*


*Comes stomping back into Bob's Diner*


straightened him out.
2013-07-08 [Nuktae-tal]: good that'll teach him to use electricity without asking!
2013-07-08 [Nekko fox]: I know, right? How dare he!


*Turns on his pop-corn maker, oscillating fan, swamp cooler, neon sign, halogen lights, search light, boom box, and a device known only as "The Electricity Gobbler"*
2013-07-08 [Nuktae-tal]: geez people now a days. Ooohh chilly. *stands in front of fridge with door open deciding on which pop to take*
2013-07-08 [Nekko fox]: *Uses the Soda Maker, the Ice Cube machine, the Redundant Tesla Coils, and the Paco Beater 8000 to make himself a sandwich*
2013-07-08 [Nuktae-tal]: Oooh that looks good I'll make me some too! *ditto*
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: Mmm, Void Sandwich. Only takes seventy-three neutron stars to make.
2013-07-09 [Nuktae-tal]: and it tastes sooo good! *uses blender and electron stirrer to make a cocktail to go with the sandwhich.*
2013-07-09 [Sideways]: I accuse you two of using junk science!
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: The voidwich cannot be stirred!
2013-07-09 [SoulOfSet]: It sounds dangerous.
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: It's dangerous to go alone.


Take this.


*gives SoS the Voidwich*
2013-07-09 [CuteCommander]: I'm only having a voidwich if it comes with a salad garnish
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: Salad garnish comes as an extra, we have to charge for it.
2013-07-09 [Avaz]: The salad garnish is really Paco's pubic hairs, but they don't tell you that.
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: Paco isn't old enough to make those yet. WHO'S BEEN STEALING MY STUFF?
2013-07-09 [Avaz]: Dammit, it's been [Nekko fox]'s pubes this whole time >_<
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: Now quit eating my stuff!
2013-07-09 [SoulOfSet]: Excuse me but i'd like a drink with my voidwich. >:(
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: *Scoops fluids out of a bucket next to the cash register and sets it by SoS*


*the cup sizzles and starts to warp due to its contents*


2013-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in, revving his Electricity Gobbler*


*charred atoms burst out of the exhaust port*
2013-07-09 [Nekko fox]: Paco, clean up after Mort again.


*Paco limply drags his still-twitching form over towards Mort, wincing as charred atoms pelt his flesh*
2013-07-10 [SoulOfSet]: *picks up his drink only to spill a bit and erode the floor*
We have a problem. Oh well.
*drinks fluid and grows tentacles*
Every damn time >:C
2013-07-10 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-07-10 [SoulOfSet]: *froths violently at the mouth*


You did this to me! Fix it!
2013-07-10 [Nekko fox]: I'll go get a cleric of Tzeentch.
2013-07-10 [Avaz]: I hope the cleric has a high SAN score...
2013-07-10 [Nuktae-tal]: geez as one of the few females here that is slightly derogatory. Cause you don't fuck with Cthulhu they fuck you tee hee
2013-07-10 [nokaredes]: I've been told to comment here. A meta comment counts, right?
2013-07-10 [Nuktae-tal]: maybe it depends though what kind of meta?
2013-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Meta comments aren't real comments. Like this one.
2013-07-11 [CuteCommander]: I think the voidwich worked - I'm struggling to determine what's real and what isn't. What do you think, late Beatles' guitarist John Lennon?
2013-07-11 [Nuktae-tal]: He can't answer you he forgot his mouth back in time with his vocal cords that one time he got high with his friends.
2013-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: George, what the hell are you talking about? Paul, slap George for me. And don't call me late, I'm always on time. Ringo, slap Paul for his sass.
2013-07-11 [Avaz]: *Misunderstanding, Ringo slaps Paul on his ass instead*
2013-07-11 [Nekko fox]: *The children of the world rejoice at the sight of Ringo slapping Paul's ass*


*The civilization collapses*
2013-07-11 [Nekko fox]: *again*
2013-07-12 [CuteCommander]: *Lennon sings 'Imagine' but changes the meaning to involve sodomy and ass-slapping*


I don't know why I talk to you John, I never liked you.


*eats McCartney's eyes for ruining the Olympic opening ceremony*
2013-07-17 [SoulOfSet]: This Voidwich is amazing.
2013-07-18 [Nekko fox]: the Voidwich comes with your choice in sides.
2013-07-18 [SoulOfSet]: *glances briefly at the menu*


Can I just custom order Mort's leg or something?
2013-07-18 [Nekko fox]: Custom orders cost extra.
2013-07-18 [Sideways]: In particular, Mort's leg costs an arm and a leg.
2013-07-18 [Nekko fox]: And usually and ear and four teeth too.
2013-07-18 [Mortified Penguin]: At least, that's the price that bear paid for it. *Mort rests his wooden leg up on table 7, right in a family's potato salad, which is basically just a head of lettuce, a thigh of lettuce, and two potatoes jammed into a used pet carrier and garnished with Mort's feet*
2013-07-18 [Nekko fox]: Damn it Mort, you know we don't have a budget for Feet Garnishings!
2013-07-18 [SoulOfSet]: I'll settle for something cheaper then. A toe or something.
*rips out an eye*
Will this work?
2013-07-19 [Nekko fox]: *Looks at it through a jeweler monocle*


Nope, inferior quality. Poor light refraction. Cataracts. Sorry, we're going to have to take the other one to break even.
2013-07-19 [SoulOfSet]: Damnit that's like the third eye I've been through. Really I need to start checking quality on buy this is ridiculous.
*hands over other eye*
While you're at it another Voidwich please.
*puts a goat on the table*
I believe this will suffice. His name is Rupert.
2013-07-19 [CuteCommander]: *sniffs the goat*


I don't think you'll get any change out of him
2013-07-19 [Avaz]: *the goat spits a wad of garlic-herb cream cheese at [CuteCommander]'s face*
2013-07-19 [CuteCommander]: *rubs a bagel into my face* Perfection
2013-07-19 [Nekko fox]: *Rubs a [CuteCommander] on a goat while sniffing [Avaz], then turns to SoS*


I'll give you half a Voidwich and one third of a flat can of coke.
2013-07-19 [Avaz]: That's a very strange interpretation of a threesome, but okay!
2013-07-20 [SoulOfSet]: That'll work.
*downs coke. tucks voidwich into front shirt pocket for later*
I appreciate the service.
*leaves a bottled lightning bolt on table*
Here's your tip.
2013-07-20 [Nekko fox]: *takes the bottled lightning bolt and tosses it to Paco who dives after it*


*the bottle is easily caught*


*Paco, however goes flying through a window*


*We are inexplicably on the 47th floor*
2013-07-20 [SoulOfSet]: He'll be fine i'm sure. Hope the bottle doesn't break. I'm not paying for the damages. Be more responsible with my tips.
2013-07-20 [Nekko fox]: *The bottom floor explodes with lightning*


*the entire structure settles one level lower*


Welcome to the forty-sixth floor, ladies and gentleman. Food costs has now tripled to accommodate the new rent cost.
2013-07-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort, having not been aware of these new developments, gets off on the 47th floor to find nothing but rows of bathrooms and Pillowthief's corpse*
2013-07-20 [Nekko fox]: *Follows Mort upstairs and starts doing measurements for his new office*
2013-07-20 [SoulOfSet]: What else is on these floors? I came up the elevator (which was not pleasant please someone get their cow out of there) and I didn't notice much else. There was a point I smelled a strong scent of ramen. Is someone stashing?
2013-07-21 [Nekko fox]: *Eats cow. Stashes Mort. Mort is ramen*


No.
2013-07-21 [SoulOfSet]: You're hiding something. *gather party for ramen vault hunting quest* I still need a cleric. Some of those creatures I saw out the elevator window looked very scary. I have a feeling mort will be the final boss.
2013-07-21 [Nekko fox]: Surfin' Bird will be your cleric.


  

2013-07-21 [CuteCommander]: Must... resist... temptation... to... copulate... with... surfing bird!
2013-07-22 [Nekko fox]: Resist all you want, it will just make his penis harder.
2013-07-22 [CuteCommander]: His screw shaped penis is beckoning me
2013-07-22 [Sideways]: 
2013-07-22 [Nekko fox]: here he is, duckfacing.


  

2013-07-23 [CuteCommander]: It's alright, humanity - there's plenty of me to go around
2013-07-23 [Nekko fox]: Especially when you're filleted, diced, and pulverized in our industrial strength meat-shredder.


*He pulls out a spare Paco with knives of various lengths glued all over his body*
2013-07-24 [CuteCommander]: *hugs spare Paco*
2013-07-24 [Nekko fox]: *Claps as the new Blood Fountain starts*
2013-07-24 [Nuktae-tal]: *holds out wine glass drinks happily* I love a good party...
2013-07-24 [CuteCommander]: I'm just happy that there's more Paco to cuddle
2013-07-25 [Nekko fox]: We're all happy CC, we're all happy.
2013-07-25 [Avaz]: *Barney the purple dinosaur comes sauntering in at that moment, singing 'I love you, you love me'*
2013-07-25 [XxTsomexX]: I hate you, you hate me. Let's get together and kill Barney, with and knife and a fork, Barneys on the floor, no more purple dinosaur.
2013-07-25 [SoulOfSet]: *collects blood sample and tosses Barney in the furnace chute*
Tragic. Anyone want to say any last words? I'm not personally but someone can.
2013-07-25 [CuteCommander]: I think it was up to Barney to say the last words.


*yells into the furnace*


GOT ANY LAST WORDS?!!
2013-07-25 [SoulOfSet]: He's already dead he can't talk
*as agonizing screams emit from the furnace*
Ugh
*slams furnace closed*
I'm sure that's just his soul or something.


2013-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Souls go around back.
2013-07-25 [SoulOfSet]: Can I just take it? Personal project. Weaponizing souls.
2013-07-25 [Nuktae-tal]: *roasts marshmellows over Barney's burning body.*
2013-07-26 [Avaz]: *Meanwhile, sleeping rocker rocks out*

2013-07-26 [CuteCommander]: My finest work of art
2013-07-26 [Nekko fox]: That....was fairly impressive.
2013-07-26 [Avaz]: I giggled a whole lot more than I probably should have when I saw it for the first time earlier this morning.
2013-07-26 [Nekko fox]: It was even funnier when they set him on fire and slow roasted him over a pit.


2013-07-26 [Avaz]: Mmmm, cracklin'.
2013-07-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-07-27 [foxyvixen17]: me at family events
2013-07-27 [SoulOfSet]: Note to self: Don't visit hypnotist. He'll find the psycho in me ._.
2013-07-27 [Nuktae-tal]: I love the psycho in me! we are best friends!
2013-07-28 [Nekko fox]: I love digging the psycho out of others...


Usually with farming implements.
2013-07-28 [CuteCommander]: Last time someone approached me with a farming implement, the psycho in me pooped itself out and fled for the hills.




.... He still writes at Christmas...
2013-07-29 [Pillowthief]: Hmm, what? Interesting things on Bob's Diner?!?








Hmmm..... Nope. Guess not.
2013-07-29 [Nuktae-tal]: aaawwww maybe he's the one I picked up, he doesn't talk much but I force feed him Alka-Seltzer to make him happy.
2013-07-29 [Nekko fox]: HOLY SHIT! [Pillowthief] came out of his hole! THREE MORE YEARS OF STEAM SALES!
2013-07-31 [XxTsomexX]:   
2013-08-01 [Sunrose]: errr
2013-08-06 [SoulOfSet]: What an excitable man.
2013-08-06 [Sideways]: Hey, did you guys know that Cockstar North, acclaimed gay video game developer, has just contracted Mort to be the star of their new game?
2013-08-06 [CuteCommander]: Cockstar North just contracted Mort? You mean like herpes?
2013-08-06 [Sideways]: Hold on, I see an Elftown error occured, somehow. One moment.
2013-08-06 [Sideways]:   



This is the first draft of the box art design!


2013-08-06 [Sideways]:   



Fucking no-life nerds already complaining about it on the interwebs.
2013-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Vidya games go around back.


Also, don't forget to go to Featured Member and nominate me, [Mortified Penguin], in the comment section! I'm serious, fucksticks. Go do that shit, so I can complain more about [wicked fae mage] only nominating based on personal preference and always picking out the same boring, overweight, glasses-wearing, roleplaying, "nerd" girls that are under the impression that they're talented in some way, but clearly are not.


But seriously. Go. Featured Member. Nominate me.
2013-08-08 [Avaz]: I must be a boring, overweight, glasses-wearing, roleplaying, "nerd" girl, too.
2013-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: YES, YOU ARE.
2013-08-08 [Avaz]: Well, 4 out of 6 ain't shabby.
2013-08-09 [Nuktae-tal]: Aw am I one of those fatty nerdy not nerd girls? Cause I thought I was a rare breed of Geek and Nerd Combined with the powers of everyone gathered into Captain Gaia!!! *theme song plays*
2013-08-09 [CuteCommander]: What Mort doesn't know is that the Featured Members are actually the Featured Sacrifices to the great Slug God
2013-08-09 [Sideways]: In The Ballad of Gay Penguin you have to go around back a lot. Occasionally you have to reach around to the front, too.
2013-08-09 [Avaz]: I misread Slug God as Smut God, which made me think, HEY, I HAVEN'T BEEN SACRIFICING ANYONE! >:O
2013-08-09 [CuteCommander]: They both need appeasing, so get to it!
2013-08-09 [Avaz]: I'm a lot easier to appease though, I estimate.
2013-08-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his issue of the latest Gay Tentacle Horse Scat Quarterly©®@Ⓜ℗, the sixth issue released this year*


Reaching around the front goes around back.
2013-08-09 [Avaz]: "Reaching Around the Front Goes Around Back" is the name of my Scatman cover band.
2013-08-12 [Avaz]: Zombie derp.
2013-08-12 [Sideways]:   


Going around back goes around back goes around back goes around back you spin me wide round back baby round back records go around back baby got back goes around back.
2013-08-15 [0-Aki]: 
2013-08-15 [CuteCommander]: You've now made me wonder how he goes for a dump...
2013-08-17 [0-Aki]: My best guess is he has a hidey hole on both sides, How the fuck he maneuvers his poop through that is beyond me though.
2013-08-18 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: lol omgish *shakes my head and smiles*
2013-08-18 [0-Aki]: Actually, now that I think of it, most superheros would have to strip down naked if they even wanted to take a piss. Diarrhea or any sudden urge of bowel or bladder movements must be a bitch for those guys. xD
2013-08-19 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: lol yes indeed tough times
2013-08-21 [Imperator]: This seems to be the only living place in Elftown. Since when did they start requiring applications to be approved to join Elftown? Seems like an awful way to increase participation...
2013-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Since I abused the old system and made a bunch of clone accounts.
2013-08-21 [Imperator]: Lol, I don't see a problem with that. You can make lots of accounts on any website as long as you use different emails.


I posted something in the suggestion forum you probably would agree with. I saw your previous post about Mainstreet and quite agreed with you. The Council seems a little touchy about suggestions of late...
2013-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody even listens to my suggestions though. They just tell me to fuck off every time for some reason.
2013-08-21 [Imperator]: We're probably in the same boat. I get the feeling they never forgave the 14 year old me when I first joined the site and was... headstrong?
2013-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: They don't tend to be forgiving.
2013-08-21 [Imperator]: I think new blood is necessary to make something happen here. It seems the same people have run it for a decade and are uninterested in trying new ideas...
2013-08-21 [CuteCommander]: I suggest more blood
2013-08-21 [Avaz]: Just make sure the knife you use is sharp enough to get a good slash at that jugular. Just having a little trickle isn't going to cut it when you can get an anime-sized 40-gallon downpour.
2013-08-21 [CuteCommander]: Knives go in the urethra, bud, and nowhere else. At least that's what they told me in catering college
2013-08-21 [Avaz]: My bad.
2013-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Catering College is not responsible for damage to the urethra.
2013-08-21 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: lol wow
2013-08-21 [CuteCommander]: Well if you're wearing a catheter in the first place then you're just asking for it to be cut open as a blade is forcibly inserted into your peehole
2013-08-21 [Avaz]: I misread "pppllleeeasssuuureeee" as "applesauce." This amuses me greatly.
2013-08-21 [Avaz]: So much win!
2013-08-21 [0-Aki]: That picture makes me crai.
2013-08-21 [0-Aki]: crai crai T__T
2013-08-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I didn't misread anything and I am not amused/
2013-08-22 [CuteCommander]: They definitely have knives in their dick holes
2013-08-22 [Sideways]:   
2013-08-22 [CuteCommander]: Seemless. Nobody will ever know...


  

2013-08-22 [Avaz]: It must be hard to drink anything without spilling I would imagine.
2013-08-22 [CuteCommander]: Nah, you use this:


  

2013-08-22 [Avaz]: Oh, of course, how silly of me to forget the enema method of drinking.
2013-08-22 [CuteCommander]: It's valid in most countries
2013-08-23 [Avaz]: Did you just quote Finding Nemo?
2013-08-28 [CuteCommander]: Depends on levels of inebriation or possible self-deprecating humour. In the right circumstances, you can pee yourself at any age (apart from 24, 24 is a no go)
2013-08-28 [Mortified Penguin]: My teeth no longer have any skin, they've been worn down to the bone after years of eating rocks.
2013-08-29 [Avaz]: While he does say no to crack, it's the plumbers that always snag his heart.


They don't even have the decency to put his heart on ice when they take it, either. Bastards.
2013-09-13 [Nekko fox]: I'm back bitches.
2013-09-13 [Nekko fox]:
Line up for a cavity search.


  

2013-09-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his copy of Looking Up With Style, tossing his hair over his shoulder in a stylish fashion*


Cavity searches go around back.


No, seriously.


*picks his wig up off the floor behind him and resumes pretending to know how to read*
2013-09-14 [Nekko fox]: *Puts on hid Civil Liberty Suppression Glove (standard issue) and begins searching for terrorists in avaz*
2013-09-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Get in there deep, those terrorists can be sneaky. *hands Nekko some spelunking gear*
2013-09-15 [Sideways]: *Hands Mort some asslunking goo lube* you'll need this. Not for lube, I mean, its cavernous in there. Its just... you'll probably want it to help appease avaz's inner goblin. Hers is a really bad one. Worse than just the one that makes you touch yourself at night.
2013-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his laptop, where he's commenting on Bob's Diner*


Ass goo goes around back.


*goes back to commenting on Bob's Diner*
2013-09-17 [Nekko fox]: *The Diner is full of ass goo*


*Ass goo is dumped on the gigantic skeleton of Misty*
2013-09-17 [Avaz]: My inner goblin is a greedy little bastard. You need to bring two wooden nickels, a string of used floss, and the empty shell of a dead snail to appease it.
2013-09-17 [CuteCommander]: I make a mean ass goo stew. I can make some for you. It contains minimal poo.
2013-09-20 [Nekko fox]: I don't believe you, everything is a lie here at Bob's Diner!


*prefers his ass goo poo stew with maximum poo unless the poo isn't stewed to be goo through the stew, but that isn't new*
2013-09-23 [Nekko fox]: Nah, gotta watch my blood pressure.
2013-09-23 [Avaz]: That's what Jeff Goldblum is for. He watches you poop and watches your blood pressure.
2013-09-23 [Nuktae-tal]: my blood feels no pressure from your poop stew!
2013-09-23 [Nekko fox]: *flicks the release valve on his blood, dousing everyone with a fountain of gore as he slowly deflates*
2013-09-23 [Avaz]:   
2013-09-24 [CuteCommander]: Best anime ever. About a girl and her levatating head friend
2013-09-24 [Avaz]: It didn't quite have the 40-gallons-of-gushing-blood I was hoping for, though.
2013-09-25 [Nekko fox]: Yeah, 39 gallons? What a rip.
2013-09-25 [Avaz]: I KNOW RIGHT?!
2013-09-30 [Nekko fox]: I bought the deluxe gore edition, it had 40 gallons and three ounces.
2013-09-30 [Avaz]: Those three ounces gives me such a jealous boner right now.
2013-09-30 [Nekko fox]: And your boner gives me a Bohner.
2013-10-01 [CuteCommander]: Your Bohner makes me turgid
2013-10-01 [Teufelsweib]: Your turgidity makes me rigid.
2013-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Your rigidness gives me a boner.
2013-10-01 [Avaz]: o/~ the ciiiiiircle of liiiiiiiife o/~
2013-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: The circle of life gives me a boner.
2013-10-01 [Avaz]: Your boner gives Anthony Weiner a Bohner.
2013-10-01 [Pillowthief]: Aaaaaaand now to not come back into Bobs for a few more months.
2013-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY. There's an apostrophe in Bob's. Don't get us sued by that law firm called Bobs Diner across the street.
2013-10-02 [Nekko fox]: Nah, we burned that bridge a long time ago. And Bobs Diner. And the warehouse next door.
2013-10-02 [CuteCommander]: But you gotta watch out for the grammar Nazis - they'll throw swastikas at you if you forget your apostrophes!
2013-10-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-10-02 [Nuktae-tal]: *Leaps upon and hugs*
2013-10-02 [Nekko fox]: Mein Gott! Sie sind zerkleinern der Luft aus meiner brust!
2013-10-02 [Sunrose]: God damn it. My German husband now thinks I'm on a Nazi website..
2013-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: At least he has an accurate impression of Elftown now.
2013-10-02 [Avaz]: XD
2013-10-02 [Sunrose]: Haha gah!
2013-10-02 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-10-03 [Nuktae-tal]: MMMMM love me an army in uniform!
2013-10-04 [Nekko fox]: Hugo boss was kind enough to do their uniforms.
2013-10-04 [Sideways]: And BMW and Mercedes supplied the cars. Adidas and Puma supplied the shoes.
2013-10-04 [Nekko fox]: And General Mills supplied the cereal.
2013-10-04 [CuteCommander]: Captain Stupendous brought the crazy
2013-10-04 [Nekko fox]: And Doctor Kavorkian provided the release from this mortal coil.
2013-10-04 [Nuktae-tal]: WHoo it's a hoity toity shin dig of an army!!
2013-10-06 [Nekko fox]: Not as hoity toity as their college professors.
2013-10-07 [Avaz]: That's because the college professors walk around in tweed blazer jackets with leather elbow patches. That's as hoity toity as it gets.
2013-10-07 [CuteCommander]: And their hoity toity pipes
2013-10-07 [Avaz]: And their hoity toity calling everyone, "my boy."


"Good show, my boy!"
2013-10-08 [Sideways]: That would be Jack, not Gerry.
2013-10-09 [Nekko fox]: Gerry is more of an "Old bean" sort of chap anyway.


*Puffs on his pipe as he settles more comfortably into his tweed blazer with leather elbow patches AND the alumni crest over the left breast, thank you very much*
2013-10-09 [Sideways]: Gerry is more of a Nazi chap. He also goes by the name "Kraut."
2013-10-09 [Nekko fox]: He's grumpy, so the other faculty members refer to him as Zee Sour Kraut.


2013-10-09 [CuteCommander]: *claps* Bravo!
2013-10-09 [Nuktae-tal]: Yavolt!
2013-10-10 [Nekko fox]: Jawohl!
2013-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Yahweh!
2013-10-10 [Nekko fox]: Pastafari!


  

2013-10-10 [Sideways]: *raises hand* I'm an atheist, so I will be ordering the rotisserie baby with a side of devil spunk.
2013-10-10 [Sideways]: And spaghetti, so I can eat your puny god.
2013-10-10 [No.]: how can you eat something you don't believe exists >_>
2013-10-10 [Sideways]: Spaghetti exists. I have empirical evidence of spaghetti. IN MAH BELLAY!
2013-10-10 [Nuktae-tal]: also if you're atheist why are you devil worshipping in your meal?
2013-10-11 [Sideways]: ..... SKEPTIC SLAP ATTACK *backhands [Nuktae-tal]* How dare you not recognize sarcasm? I know Bob's serves rotisserie baby, and quite possibly Mort's sperm passed off as genuine devil spunk, but I was only kidding. I just want one order of your Pastafarian god, please.
2013-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks back and forth suspiciously behind the register, before leaning in close*


Pssst. Hey, buddy, wanna buy some White Castle?
2013-10-11 [Sideways]: Only if it has onions. o-o
2013-10-11 [CuteCommander]: Don't do it, it's a cunning ploy!
2013-10-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *bite's hand that hit me. With fake teeth made of shark teeth based on real dimensions to fit the human mouth... ish mouth*
2013-10-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Fun fact: Go nominate [Mortified Penguin] for Featured Member.


Funner fact: Also, nominate Mort's rooster or lion drawing or something for Featured Art.


Funnest fact: DO I LOOK LIKE I'M JOKING TO YOU? DO I? THIS IS SOME SERIOUS SHIT. *angrily throws his clown nose against the wall in a fit of handsome rage*
2013-10-12 [Sideways]: I like Shark Fin Soup too.
2013-10-12 [Nuktae-tal]: I don't have a fin... I'm a human... you are delicious though!
2013-10-12 [Sideways]: I get told that a lot.
2013-10-13 [Sunrose]: Isn't that art really old? I know I've seen that lion before, though I thought it was on Turkey's house (Edit: it still is >_<). When you are going to make something new, yourself?
2013-10-14 [Sideways]: Ooooooh, sick burn!!!
2013-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *Burn coughs sickly*
2013-10-14 [Sideways]: Yeah! When are you going to draw us a butt-lookiting penguin?
2013-10-14 [Sunrose]: Yeah!
2013-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah!
2013-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yeah!
2013-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: OH GOD YES!
2013-10-15 [Avaz]: YEAH!
2013-10-15 [Koho Ai]: Yeah
2013-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes.
2013-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: *nom nom nom* *throws bacon popcorn at people*
2013-10-15 [Sunrose]: YAR!
2013-10-15 [Sideways]:   



YARR!
You are a Pirate's first mate. The Dick Ninja.
2013-10-15 [Avaz]: This picture would also work with Deadpool. *nod*
2013-10-15 [Sideways]: Do not compare dick ninja to Deadpool
2013-10-16 [Nekko fox]: https://e621.net/post/show/28042/2006-amazing-animated-butt-dancing-female-flash-fr
2013-10-16 [CuteCommander]: Yar-har fiddle-dee-dee, raise up the flag with your muscular willy!
2013-10-16 [Nekko fox]:   
2013-10-16 [Sideways]: I don't go to Newgrounds for the same reason I wouldn't bang Lindsey Lohan without a condom: I do not want to catch every fucking virus and worm imaginable.
2013-10-17 [Nekko fox]: *looks up from his Newgrounds Newspaper*


Sounds like you don't know how to internet very well.


*sips from his Best of 4chan mug*
2013-10-17 [Sideways]: Imma 'bout to Interwebs you in the face, negro fox!
2013-10-17 [Nekko fox]: You gotta catch me first!


*Gets on the kiddie ride that was stolen from in front of the Kroger store*
2013-10-17 [Sideways]: Damn! He's escaping! Wait, your horse can't outrun...
A ROCKET SHIP!!!
*gets on the kiddie ride stolen from Kmart*
2013-10-17 [CuteCommander]: This is officer, cute, I'm in pursuit of two speeding perps *gets on the kiddie ride stolen from Tesco* Officer Pugwash, take down their license plates!
2013-10-17 [Avaz]: I was a member on Newgrounds before it was cool to bash on NG. Actually, that was back when NG was still cool.
2013-10-18 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a plane!
2013-10-18 [Sideways]: Rocket still wins! *his ride explodes when the O ring fails and the rocket's solid hydrogen tank explodes. Successfully ejects, only to have some Columbians fire heat resistant foam into his face at the speed of sound*
2013-10-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks it off his face and flies off on a jet pack of her own design*
2013-10-19 [Sideways]: *as the foam was of the solid variety, Sideways lies on his collapsed parachute, stunned as to why some blonde stranger licked his face.*
Wait... If I see a man in a purple fedora and velvet suit with a shiny cane come in here, I'll deny ever seeing you!
2013-10-19 [Sheamus Finn]: *holds up the video camera* Nope, you can't...
2013-10-19 [Nuktae-tal]: I should have gotten some for leftovers... come back here! *chases Sideways*
2013-10-19 [Sideways]: *feigns fear and collapses, figuring he'd try the strange, and yell "OKLAHOMA!" if it got too weird.*
2013-10-19 [Sheamus Finn]: *facepalms* Oh no, you said her activation word.
2013-10-19 [Nuktae-tal]: OOOOOOOOOKLAHOOOOOMA Where the wind comes sweeping down the PLAAAIIIIINNNSSS!!!!
2013-10-19 [Sideways]: Not show tunes! My only weakness! *melts into a puddle, gets immediately vacuumed into a shop-vac by Paco.*
2013-10-20 [Nekko fox]: Not Puddles in Shop Vacs! My only weakness!


*Nothing disadvantageous occurs*
2013-10-21 [CuteCommander]: It's super-effective!
2013-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort unexpectedly gains 20xp*


*Mort levels up to level 16*


*Mort continues reading his newspaper uninterestedly*
2013-10-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *Licks newspaper*
2013-10-21 [Sideways]: *shopvac bursts into flames, then, like a phoenix from the ashes, Sideways ascends from the toxic burning plastic*
HEY! You were supposed to be licking me!
2013-10-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *Licks Mort too*
2013-10-21 [Sideways]: Awwww. o~o
2013-10-21 [Sideways]: *nuzzles hazmat [No.]*
2013-10-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *Eats Hazmat hand*
2013-10-22 [Sideways]: What more proof do you need that Bob's Diner exists in the Fallout universe?
2013-10-22 [Avaz]: I want Ron Perlman to tell me, "War. War never changes." Also, I'd like a suit of Power Armor Mk. II.
2013-10-22 [Sheamus Finn]: Time for a credit check...
2013-10-24 [Nekko fox]: *Checks Sheamus' credit card and throws into the soup*


Sorry, seems you aren't cleared for purchase for the Power Armor Mk. II.


*Checks Avaz' credit by tossing it into the Paco*


Sorry, but you are cleared to be anything but a Super Mutant.
2013-10-24 [Avaz]: That's cool. I'll be Fawkes.
2013-10-24 [Nuktae-tal]: *eats soup and licks Paco* Nom Nom Nom
2013-10-24 [Nekko fox]: *goes back to reading End of the World Time*


Hm, they have a new article on radioactive fallout.
2013-10-26 [Nuktae-tal]: Neck Oh Fox. is how I usually think it. *Licks Nekko Fox*
2013-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I pronounce it like, "Neaueckoux F4auokxx". Many of those letters and numbers are silent though, I just can't remember which ones.
2013-12-08 [Pillowthief]: Wait, hang-on... Nope. You're all still sad and pathetic. Excellent.
2013-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his eighth bowl of ramen today*


*raises a finger as if to say something*


*says nothing*


*resumes eating his eleventh bowl of ramen*
2013-12-09 [Nuktae-tal]: *helps eat Nekko's ramen*
2013-12-10 [Sideways]: Nekko has abandoned us. )_)
2013-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his Nekko shaped chair*


Yeah, no idea what happened to him.


*scrapes the mud off his shoes on the side of his Nekko shaped chair and then resumes sitting on his Nekko shaped chair*
2013-12-10 [Sheamus Finn]: Used to be you couldn't swing a dead mexican in here without hitting a Nekko Fox....
2013-12-10 [CuteCommander]: It's all that Nekko Fox hunting, with the Nekko Hounds and Nekko Toffs chasing them to extinction
2013-12-11 [Nuktae-tal]: *pet's half dead Paco and continues eating Ramen*
2013-12-11 [Avaz]: What does the Nekko Fox say?
2013-12-11 [Teufelsweib]: dude. still?
2013-12-11 [CuteCommander]: BANISH HIM!!
2013-12-11 [Nekko fox]: I say you're all fired.


*Goes back to reading 'Firing Employees: A Guide to Self-Empowerment and Firing Employees' by Dr. Jew*
2013-12-11 [Avaz]: Sorry, Teuf. It's stuck in my head. My child loves that song. X_X
2013-12-12 [Nuktae-tal]: KRAKAKAKAKAAKAKAAKAKAK! That's what the gun says *uses tommy gun*
2013-12-12 [Nekko fox]: Avaz, you're on maternity leave.
2013-12-12 [Sheamus Finn]: Who's gonna swing the dead Mexicans?
2013-12-12 [Nekko fox]: Now now, JM, Sheamus' balls are the one's the swing the dead Mexicans and we can't put them out of work. They're unionized.
2013-12-12 [Teufelsweib]: kekeke :P
2013-12-12 [Nekko fox]: Well, as long as they don't experience removal by pliers, everything should work out fine.
2013-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I can sign for that.


*without even looking up from his newpaper, Mort casually signs the Ball Removal Form*


Just put it around back with the other deliveries.


*continues reading his paper*
2013-12-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *put's Paco in a big pot to boil* Why am I so hungry?! *eats a lollipop*
2013-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Wwwaaaaaaiiiiiiit a second... WE NEVER GET DELIVERIES HERE.


*grabs his sword off the weapon rack and heroically stabs a UPS delivery man who just showed up at the door with six packages*
2013-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *having saved the day, like usual, he returns to his newspaper*


*reads an ad in the Help Wanted section about a lowly Mexican employee working at a terrible job in a diner that gets abused and is desperate to find a new job, "anywhere, anywhere at all. Please, for the love of God, get me out of here," the ad goes on to say*


*glares at Paco*


PACO! Stop bathing and call this ad and hire this man right away, he sounds like just the type of person we need to turn things around here. And be quick about it! *hurls a few Employee Motivation Bricks™ at Paco, hilariously shattering his funny bone and humorously crushing his humerus*
2013-12-12 [Nekko fox]: *Applauds at Mort's cunning display of brilliant intelligence (matched only by his clever wit and astute intellect) and goes back to doing a profound amount of nothing*


Mort, you owe overtime for all this excess work I'm doing around here.
2013-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Asking for payment owed at B's D... I respect that. It takes guts and shows leadership. You will be rewarded 1.3 apples for your bravery.


*opens the cash register and hands Nekko one apple and a crab apple (now with 20% more crabs!), neither of which came from the register*


Now to pay our other employees.


*Mort graciously hands himself $500 and thanks himself for his amazing service and handsome face*


*Mort slaps the money out of his hand, disgusted*


That's all I get?! For my years of dedication?! For all the times I spit in people's food, even when they didn't ask for it?! You son of a bitch!


*Mort stabs himself and collapses in a pool of blood on the floor. Not his blood though, it was already there, probably from that other guy that got stabbed*
2013-12-12 [Nekko fox]: *Nekko takes the apples, gets that special shampoo for the crabs (they DO have a date tonight after all), gives half of one apple to Eve and the other to Snow White (that harlot), and looks around for where he left his blood. He notices Mort, complete with a knife wound, laying in it*


Damn it Mort, we need that blood for the show later, and now you've got that ominous-sounding thing called 'Business' all over our hemoglobin.
2013-12-12 [Nuktae-tal]: Here clean it with Paco I hear it's like magic. *pours boiling Paco over Mort and blood*
2013-12-12 [Sideways]: Hey! look, the prodigal rapist has returned! *Throws confetti* Oh, Hi Nekko! good to see you back. I was just doing my "Mort has come to work" ceremony.
2013-12-13 [Sideways]: Hey, get fucked, you comely lass! *flourishes with a cutlass, and spontaneously gains a cockney accent and a pirate eyepatch*
2013-12-13 [Nekko fox]: Damn it Sideways, get out of the gay orgy fantasy set, we have a film to shoot in ten minutes and you're wearing the peg leg and the hook, MORT GETS THE EYEPATCH AND CUTLASS.


We've been over this. Did you get those messages I sent via carrier pigeon?


*Indicates a pile of pigeons that appear to have been thrown haphazardly and at high speed at the south-facing wall*
2013-12-13 [Sideways]: No I didn't! *looks where Nekko points* Oh see, THERE'S where you went wrong! I live southeast of you. You needed to smash them in the corner, over there. *indicates slightly to the left of the pile of pigeons* now I guess I will just... hey, this gay-pirate-orgy eyepatch has a string? *notices dangly black thread hanging from his face.*


Oh, my...this isn't adhesive sticking this to my face, is it?
D:
2013-12-13 [Nekko fox]: No, it was a prop in our last film, Bukkake Bakers of Bramble-bee.


You might want to wash your face.


MORT! Suit up for the auditions.
2013-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *casually dusts off the blood and knives and puts on his suit*
2013-12-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *sits behind camera aiming it at pigeons* Yeah coo you little bastards coo.
2013-12-13 [CuteCommander]: *eats one of the pigeons * Coo!
2013-12-13 [Nuktae-tal]: SLOWER! yeeesssss now lick it! *films*
2013-12-14 [Nekko fox]: *Films Nuktae filming CC eating pigeons who are watching Mort dust himself*


BRILLIANT! With luck, this will end up on the bottom shelf of some hipster's private video library and never see the light of day.
2013-12-14 [Koho Ai]: *walks up to Nekko* I'm Agent Evol of the FPI did you realize you are illegally filming underage pigeons without consent from an approving adult? *is holding out a gold sparkling badge that says FPI*
2013-12-15 [CuteCommander]: *licks the pigeons' feet* We have legal waivers!
2013-12-15 [Nekko fox]: Waivers are for the lower class, I have Diplomatic Immunity.


*Holds up his doctors certificate proving his inoculations are up to date against Diplomats*
2013-12-15 [CuteCommander]: *blows a hole in the certificate with his mighty Extendo-dong* It's just been revoked!
2013-12-15 [Nekko fox]: OH GOD NO!


*Diplomats begin crawling out of the back from where they take deliveries no less, and drag Nekko screaming into the darkness*


*Nekko re-emerges seventeen hours later holding a bloody dildo-bat and smoking cat-launcher*


I guess you could say...Negotiations broke down.
2013-12-16 [Avaz]: *puts on sunglasses*
YEEEEAAAAHHHH!
2013-12-16 [Sideways]: It's only teenage diplomat-rape Wasteland. The good news is, Nekko won't get fooled again.
2013-12-16 [CuteCommander]: Get to the chopper! *flings self at invisible midgets*
2013-12-17 [Sheamus Finn]:    for the midgets...
2013-12-17 [Nuktae-tal]: AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAAHAHAHAHHAHA*goes purple* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
2013-12-30 [Nekko fox]: I approve of Ashamed Fin and his pun.


*Hands him the Pun Crown (no regal authority is imparted upon acceptance of this diadem, some restriction may apply, accepters of said diadem are adherent to all local and state laws, wearer may be subject to peasant revolts, uprisings, mutinies, and overthrows, and may be subject to any of the following: beheadings, lynchings, burnings, crucifixions, smitings, stonings, beatings, stabbings, betrayals, and slow death by venereal disease)*
2014-01-06 [Sheamus Finn]: Hiya Hungry! (da dum dum....)
2014-01-06 [Koho Ai]: (TSS...)
2014-01-06 [Sunrose]: http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/flash/bang
2014-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Shh, everybody be quiet. [Pillowthief] has logged on for his monthly feeding...
2014-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I SAID SHUT UP, FAMOUS SHIN! *loudly throws a pile of pots, knives, and firecrackers at [Sunrose], getting them all caught in her majestic, flowing beard*
2014-01-09 [Sunrose]: Hmm? :P
2014-01-12 [Nekko fox]: Nice beard, Sol Rosa
2014-01-12 [Nuktae-tal]: I shaved this year!
2014-01-12 [Nekko fox]: That poor beaver!
2014-01-12 [Sheamus Finn]:   
2014-01-12 [CuteCommander]: I wet myself...
2014-01-13 [Nekko fox]: PACO! Quit watering CC, water ain't free!


*Paco stops wetting CC and hands him the bill*
2014-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: We're also gonna have to charge you for the expensive paper we use to print our bills on. We use authentic and original pieces of the Dead Sea Scrolls!


Not really though. But we say we do and we're going to charge you as if it were. That would just be silly if we actually did though, those are important historical documents!


*chuckles and casually chugs Red Bull, absinthe, and vodka from the Holy Grail, while pretending to take orders and just randomly hitting keys on the register*
2014-01-24 [Sideways]: *Stumbles drunkenly out of the bathroom with my pants around my ankles*
Y'all outta Turin Paper. Got any more holy effigies of the lord? I ate a whole plate of the Holy Ghost Pepper and Transmutation wafer appetizer for lunch, and I think the fires of hell might be stuck to my cheeks... ;_;
2014-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in so hard that he bursts out, never to be heard from again*
2014-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts back in, silently*


*mimes his order to the hard working cashier and quietly takes his seat*


*leaves again with his seat, never to be seen from again*


*his order goes to waste*


*starving children die for some reason*
2014-01-24 [Mortified Penguin]: PACO! Replace the missing chair at table 19; throw out this six pound Kobe beef steak, 3,000-year-old wine signed by Jesus™, and 100 Million-year-old Bob's Famous Mesozoic Baked Potato with Excessive Salt™ signed by Jesus™ and Stalin© that somebody didn't pick up; and then sweep those inexplicably dead children into the storage fridge!
2014-01-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts back in invisibly*


*unseeingly drags one of the children away*


*could be for sexual purposes. Maybe cannibalism! Who knows! I sure don't, I'm drunk as shit!*


Hey, shut the fuck up, Actions in Asterisks™, nobody needs to know that!


*you're invisible and silent, stupid, nobody will know*


Oh, okay. That's good, they'd probably think I'm kinda weird for drunkenly molesting this corpse and then eating it.


*yeah, this country has some fucked up morals...*


Ugh, don't even get me started. When did we lose our way...?


*I don't know, buddy... I just don't know*


%hugs it out%


*percent signs, that doesn't even make sense...*


Shut up, I'm drunk.


*wait, aren't we all acting as different entities for this joke?*


Shut up, I'm drunk.


*runs screaming silently and flailing invisibly out one of the many holes in the roof*
2014-01-27 [kians mummy]: Wooh remen is 800 Yen, wow lol
2014-01-27 [kians mummy]: lol
2014-01-28 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: PACO ATE THEM!
2014-01-29 [XxTsomexX]: That son of a bitch.
2014-01-29 [Sheamus Finn]: You know PACO that well?
2014-01-29 [XxTsomexX]: The bastard took all the nachos. I don't have to know him in order to murder him and make nachos out of him.
2014-01-29 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: I think you'd have a hard time passing deep fried paco off as nachos. Pork rinds would be more realistic
2014-01-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Plus who has time to cut out all those triangles....
2014-01-29 [CuteCommander]: I have a paco nacho cutter... Not that I've used it
2014-01-29 [XxTsomexX]: Now is the time to use it. Pork rinds, nachos, whatever. If its edible we can sell it.
2014-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: It doesn't have to be edible to sell it.
2014-01-29 [XxTsomexX]: Depends on your definition of edible also.
2014-01-30 [XxTsomexX]: Add a little children's tears and cracked pepper. It is delightful.
2014-01-30 [Sideways]: *holds on to a table for dear life, doing his best not to be sucked into the gravity singularity caused by Tsome's boobs*
2014-01-30 [XxTsomexX]: It's not my fault they have their own gravitational field.
2014-01-30 [Sideways]: *has an epiphany* I'm an idiot! I know what to do! *lets go of the table and flies at Tsome, preparing himself to land in the motorboat position.*
2014-01-30 [XxTsomexX]: Carefuuuul Sideways, the husband may be lurking around the corner, waiting for his chance to strike. Besides, I dropped some pepper jack cheese down there earlier. Might still be there and if that gets into your eye, that would suck.
2014-01-30 [Sideways]: Sugar, I eat ghost peppers and habeneros like your hubby eats potato chips! *I say, while flying through the air. As I near Tsome's magnificent rack, Paco comes in to clean the puke-stained sawdust on the floor and lay out new rushes. My crotch strikes the janitor in the back of his large, bulbous head, and I cratch to the floor, weeping, cradling my balls, in the fetal position Still, I slide across the disgusting floor inch by inch* I'm...placing a betting pool...on the bra size... I say 36DD, anyone wanna bet on it? ten bucks...*slides slowly, still weeping on the floor*
2014-01-30 [CuteCommander]: I'll take your bet and raise you 3 queens *throws three crossdressers onto the table*
2014-01-30 [XxTsomexX]: *cracks up at your misfortune* Automatic reaction is to laugh when others are in pain. :P I wanna see where this betting pool is going before I reply.
2014-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: It's Famous Shin's birthday today, according to some stupid cat!


*Bob's Diner's employees perk up at the sounds of "birthday" and start happily clapping their hands and singing, while forming a group circle around the wee baby Sheamus*


*they pick him up and start eating his face*


*they weren't employees*


*they were zombies*


*they weren't even singing, I just made that part up*


*they were clapping their hands though*
2014-02-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: So does that mean the birthday baby had blood orange frosting?
2014-02-07 [Avaz]: Yes, but no oranges were present. Just blood.
2014-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: And frosting.
2014-02-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: And candles
2014-02-07 [Koho Ai]: And Fire
2014-02-07 [CuteCommander]: Was there a clown? There have to be clowns. Homicidal ones preferably
2014-02-07 [Avaz]: It's cool. Additional mayhem goes around back.
2014-02-08 [Koho Ai]: Can I bring Annihilation he's a pretty fun guy to hang with.
2014-02-08 [Sideways]: Annihilation always quits the party too early. He can't handle his torture liquor. You're better off bringing Genocide, or Catastrophe. Unlike Annihilation, they don't ruin everything. ;)
2014-02-08 [Koho Ai]: Fine, I'll call Apocalypse, Famine, and Cyanide. They definitely know how to hold their liquor. :P
2014-02-08 [CuteCommander]: Shame Misery can't come, she loves company
2014-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Company already left though, he was meeting up with Corporation at the park under the big tree for a little shady Business.
2014-02-08 [Koho Ai]: But don't fret cause Lust and Sin just walked in ;)
2014-02-08 [CuteCommander]: Promiscuity is eyeing them up
2014-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I have a sampler platter here for Indecision! And an extra large bathtub of ice cream for Gluttony!


God, these people have stupid names. I guess that's what I get for moving the diner into a black neighborhood... *gesticulates wildly at Mordor out the window*


*tosses the orders in the trash and goes back to shooting dice and heroin and passersby with Racism, the fried chicken eating, grape soda drinking, unemployed, lazy, incompetent Orc gentleman*
2014-02-09 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: What happened to #30 on the lunch menu? 0.o
2014-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: It went extinct.
2014-02-09 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: haha oh.
2014-02-09 [CuteCommander]: What was it? Decency? Funny comedian? Classy couple? Cheap gas price?
2014-02-10 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: haha i see what you did there! >.<
2014-02-10 [Sideways]:   
[Nekko fox] is unimpressed with your witticism
2014-02-11 [Avaz]: He might enjoy that. As might you. >_>
Just saying.
2014-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Rectal chewing sounds intense.


*jots that down on his to-do list, along with making a to-do list and jotting things down*
2014-02-11 [Koho Ai]: New Olympics Event created The Rectal Chew.


Said Person must chew asshole longer then said opponent. (Note: Rectal Bleeding may occur in mouth. The Olympics can not and will not be held liable for bleeding of the asshole at anytime or place during the Olympics or for that matter at anytime or place outside the Olympics mandated time)


LET THE GAME BEGIN!!!!!!!!
2014-02-12 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: hahaha oh goodness.......what the hell did i just read?!
2014-02-12 [Avaz]: Points are deducted if the referee sees a contestant using their tongue. Additional points deducted for moaning.
2014-02-12 [Koho Ai]: No holes will be filled with fingers in this event. If such an act occurs the abuser will be videotaped and disqualified from the event. The video will be posted on the internet for all the people to see how you cheated during the Olympics. It does not count as porn and will not be removed under those jurisdictions.
2014-02-12 [Koho Ai]: Seymour Butts will be presiding over this event. He was the most qualified.
2014-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: As opposed to Chewmour Butts, his younger brother, who was always more of a tit man.
2014-02-12 [Koho Ai]: Well we tried to get the his father Lickmour Butts, but that would only confuse the competitors about what the event truly was.


Though his sister Straponmour Butts was totally down to tap this event.
2014-02-13 [XxTsomexX]: I forgot Jaeger tastes like licorice... eeeew.
2014-02-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: HAHAHAHAHAHAHA [XxTsomexX] THATS PRICELESS! Way to change subject. I was quite interested in how far they would take that conversation.
2014-02-13 [Koho Ai]: Chewing someone's asshole while drinking Jaeger will get rid of the licorice taste just like that :P
2014-02-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: AH HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2014-02-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: The licorice taste might also drown out the taste of the anal bleeding too.
2014-02-13 [Koho Ai]: The anal blood is the best part you don't want to drown that out.
2014-02-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: your disturbing....
2014-02-13 [Koho Ai]: No disturbing is what we do with fecal matter. You know that chocolate cake you had. Exactly.
2014-02-13 [Blood Sucking Beauty]: *sigh*
2014-02-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Deliveries go around back.


*aggressively points at the front door without looking up from his copy of Paying Attention to Customers Monthly And By That We Mean That We Publish Monthly, Not That You Should Only Pay Attention To Them Monthly Weekly, the latest novel in a series of short stories he's been keeping up with*


Interesting...


*circles one of the want ads*
2014-02-17 [Koho Ai]: *hands over the necessary equipment for you to go around behind* That will be €20.
2014-02-17 [Sideways]: While we are adding younger versions of people who exist to the menu, I would like to add this to the menu
  

It came addressed to "Leonardo DiCaprio." For some reason, he came with a hood over his head and twice his body weight in gold bars strapped to his back and a note that read
"Congrats on closing your loop," whatever the fuck that means. I'd like to sell him to Mort, or that creepy lady who is trying to buy that... *puts on glasses* THAT'S ALSO YOUNG LEONARDO DiCAPRIO!


*pulls out a big supersoaker watergun.*
Bitch, give me the gold buillion you found strapped to that past version of Leonardo DiCaprio, or I'll do your do! I swear, I will spray this water Alll over your perfectly styled hair!!!


2014-02-17 [Koho Ai]: €55 then?
2014-02-17 [Koho Ai]: I said €55 *takes back the equipment and takes Leonardo DiCaprio out back*....................*Leonardo DiCaprio's screams echo off the walls of Bob's Diner*
2014-02-17 [Sideways]: Don't you ignore me! You French, English, Barbado..Barba...BARBARIAN!
*Tries to pump the Supersoaker, points the nozzle, but trips over the cord leading to the backpack auxiliary tank. Ends up pulling the trigger while fumbling the weapon. A torrent of flaming napalm sprays over the table marked "Republicans ONLY." The occupants of which were just about to get up to complain to the owner that some "pinko commies" were speaking "the language of surrender."


The Supersoaker is, ironically, a flamethrower.


6 cousins who were also brothers and sisters who all came from North Carolina were killed.*
2014-02-18 [Avaz]: *checks his BitTorrent client* Huh, that's strange, I don't remember trying to download a torrent of flying napalm. Better continue with it and see what happens.
2014-02-18 [CuteCommander]: You'll need a fireproof firewall
2014-02-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *has flaming napalm fully downloaded, but isn't seeding it*
2014-02-26 [Sideways]: A delivery man comes in. "I'll need a signature! This package here says "scumbag hat, flat brim, size eight for a Mister Penguin?"
2014-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: This is unacceptable, I ordered a scum baghat, not a scumbag hat!
2014-03-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, deliveries go around back.


*signs "Avaz" on the clipboard and hands it back to the delivery man*
2014-03-25 [Avaz]: GOD DAMN IT, MORT!
*God appears, and damns It*
2014-03-25 [Nekko fox]: Is Mort still Morting in here?
2014-03-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from the Mort he was just Morting*


Doubtful.


*Mort goes back to Mort Morting Mortfully*
2014-03-26 [CuteCommander]: I've never seen such a poor excuse of Morting than the Morting being Morted by Mort. Paco is, in my mind, the Mortingest Morter I ever did see
2014-03-26 [Sheamus Finn]:   
2014-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *Paco, the new Mort, looks up from Morting at the register*


"Deliveries go around back."


*Mort delivers a fresh crate of Morts around back*
2014-03-27 [Nekko fox]: *Mort Morts to the Mort, leaving a trail Mort for the Morts to Mort by*


Mort, Mort this Mort while you aren't Mort, Mort! Mort?


*Morts*
2014-03-27 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: *snorts a Mort*
2014-03-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Toes.
2014-03-28 [Sheamus Finn]: Nose.
2014-03-28 [Nekko fox]: Bows.
2014-03-28 [Avaz]: Hoes.
2014-03-28 [Teufelsweib]: Blows.
2014-03-28 [CuteCommander]: Ghettos
2014-03-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Furrows
2014-03-29 [Sheamus Finn]: burrows
2014-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Corpses.
2014-03-29 [CuteCommander]: Sturmgeschutzen
2014-03-29 [Sideways]: Purge a muffin
2014-03-29 [Nuktae-tal]: Hemoglobins
2014-03-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Hobgoblins
2014-03-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Hemogoblins.
2014-03-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Snob Goblins.
2014-03-29 [Sunrose]: Gobble gobble
2014-03-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Wobble Hobble
2014-03-29 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Bobble
2014-03-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Hobble
2014-03-30 [CuteCommander]: Bob
2014-03-30 [Sheamus Finn]: Nob
2014-03-30 [CuteCommander]: I was hoping that you'd say that. I am now turgid.
2014-03-30 [Nuktae-tal]: Murdered?
2014-03-30 [Sheamus Finn]: My Rhymer broke....
2014-04-02 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: What a joke
2014-04-02 [CuteCommander]: You poor bloke
2014-04-02 [Sideways]: Bedeebuhduhdeebebedwee, THAT'S ALL, FOLKS!  
2014-04-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from a picture of himself looking up from something*


HEY! This is a family environment!


*he points at the soup pot as Paco starts shoveling families into the boiling sludge*
2014-04-03 [Sideways]: Apologies. Had to stop the rhyme parade and return to blatantly racist meta-humour.


Hold on, when did you get this new wall? What's with the big number 4 on it. OMG it's BREAKING!
2014-04-03 [CuteCommander]: *bursts through the 4th wall* Oh yeah!
2014-04-03 [Sheamus Finn]: It's the JONESTOWN Kool-aid MAN!!!
2014-04-03 [Nuktae-tal]: *takes drink out of head*
2014-04-03 [Avaz]: YOU JUST DRANK BRAINS!
2014-04-04 [CuteCommander]: Gib meh bacuh mah blanes!
2014-04-04 [Sheamus Finn]: Great now CC is talkin' all stroke like
2014-04-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I've now added a fun little arcade with lots of games for the kids to the page!
2014-04-10 [Sideways]: Welcome to heaven, Jim....
  

HO YEEEAAAAaaaahhhhHH!!!
2014-04-11 [Nuktae-tal]: *Decides no and spits them back in. Thrn shuts the head. And goes for paco this time.*
2014-04-16 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: gives a fuck and gets AIDS
2014-04-16 [Stephen]: Wow, the amount of comments is really declining here.
2014-04-16 [Sideways]: Your face is declining.
2014-04-17 [Sheamus Finn]: Oh, no not another stroke paitent? Paco what did you put in this soup?!
2014-04-17 [Sideways]: "streechnine," replies Paco.
2014-04-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I said use BLEACH, PACO! BLEACH! *starts rolling up a newspaper menacingly*


*hands it to Paco*


Have that steamed and pressed.


*goes back to reading his shirt*
2014-04-21 [Avaz]: I am the one and only Smut God. There is no challenging me on this.
Carry on.
2014-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I challenge your right to deny my challenges!
2014-04-21 [Avaz]: Challenge accepted! I refer you to the second half of the text of smut god, where it implicitly grants me the right to deny your challenge because you can't claim the title.
2014-04-21 [Sheamus Finn]: I nominate Mort for PornMaster General!
2014-04-22 [Sideways]: Nominations go around back.
2014-04-22 [Avaz]: So does the buttsecks.
2014-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That "You can't" on the page is saying I can't become a Smut God, but it doesn't say I can't be the Smut God. And there has been another Smut God in the past, so there can clearly be different Smut Gods, just not simultaneously, apparently. And I'm much smuttier than you and deserve the title! *does something smutty, which proves his point*
2014-04-22 [Sunrose]: I don't remember you ever being smutty, just snotty :P
2014-04-23 [Sideways]: What she said.
2014-04-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Yes, but my snot is very smutty.
2014-04-24 [Sheamus Finn]: Nasal porn...Ewwwww
2014-04-26 [Sunrose]: 2 girls 1 snot >_<
2014-04-26 [CuteCommander]: Your smut cannot compete with mine *reveals nipple* There. Top that
2014-04-26 [Sheamus Finn]: Ha! *Reveals 3 nipples* Bring it! 0.o
2014-04-26 [CuteCommander]: *reveals cuttlefish lodged between buttocks* I was only just beginning!
2014-04-26 [Sideways]: Tentacle pr0n goes around...wayyyy the fuck out of ...here... just... no. Nein. Non. Cease and desist.
2014-04-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *reveals three cuttlefish lodged between his buttocks*


*Mort's personal proctologist glares*
2014-04-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *takes pictures of all and sells them making lots of money. Then cooks money and eats as a money lasagna.*
2014-04-29 [CuteCommander]: Fuck. *reveals shitting dick nipples* That's all I've got
2014-04-29 [Sheamus Finn]: You might wanna have those checked. *pages Doctor Paco*
2014-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]: That's just his name, don't confuse him with an actual doctor.
2014-04-29 [Sheamus Finn]: *Stops filling out fraudulent insurance forms* Well, there goes the addition on the diner....
2014-04-29 [CuteCommander]: But my dick nipples are shitting in the soup! I need help!
2014-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Fun fact: 0.45% of all wiki comments on Elftown have been made at Bob's Diner.
2014-05-06 [CuteCommander]: Good to know we're contributing to the Zeitgeist. *shits out of his dick nipples and lactates from his rectum*
2014-05-19 [Sheamus Finn]: Good and Bad news: Bad, no insurance company will pay for treatment...Good, I have a bunch of corks!
2014-05-19 [Sideways]: 
2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Here is a graph showing B's D's comment history divided up by month until this point in time:


  

2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Some of B's D's top commenters (not all) and the number of comments they've posted (approximately):
[Sagacious Turkey] - 3420
[Mortified Penguin] - 6312
[Nekko fox] - 2333
[Pillowthief] - 1524
[nokaredes] - 3152
[~Crimson Angel~] - 2566
[PixieStickChick] - 421
[Sunrose] - 101


Frequent words and the number of times they appear in B's D:
"Bob's Diner" - 524
"B's D" - 687
"elftown" - 186
"ramen" 2305
"*" - 51,439
"Mort" - 1203


Total overall since 2004:
Words - 583,046
Characters (no space) - 3,280,641
Characters (with space) - 3,835,636
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: Wow
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: how
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: do
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: I
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: get
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: on
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: that
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: list
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: ?
2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Total average comments for each month:
  

2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: [Sheamus Finn], you have a total of 124 comments. Shame on you.
2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Your first comment here was:
"2011-02-18 [Sheamus Finn]: And thus Were-mutts were born......"
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: What was I smoking?
2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *checks his data*


Meth.
2014-05-21 [Sideways]: I think a top commentor list should come out for the past four years. Sagacious Turkey would get raped rout out of the top ten.
2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: You're only at 171 comments (170 for the last 4 years)! Your first comment was:


"2009-08-05 [Sideways]: I have come to order one cup of your coffee then take up a table all day while i Listen to an Ipod, talk on the phone and go clickity clack on a macbook air all day. I shallt be your resident liberal jerk! Bwahahaha"
2014-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: From 2010-05-21 to 2014-05-21, the last four years, [Sagacious Turkey] has made 121 comments.
2014-05-21 [Sheamus Finn]: What the heck did he take a vow of silence?!
2014-05-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yes.


...DAMMIT.
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Here are Bob's Diner's top 75 commenters as well as their total (approximate) number of comments as of 2014-05-20:


  



These numbers should be much more accurate than the others I mentioned, since I copied all of Bob's Diner's comments into a Word document and then isolated the usernames and pasted them into Excel before running some statistical diagnoses on them. Many hours were wasted. I regret much.
2014-05-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: At least seven of those usernames are me!
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: The top ten commenters alone account for 62.16% of all comments ever made on B's D!
2014-05-22 [Sheamus Finn]: I didn't know you still wnet by Sunrose Sagacious Turkey...
2014-05-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: Of course I do. It's my troll account that I harass people with.
2014-05-22 [Sideways]: Omg, that makes me sad. Apparently, right as I joined elftown, I JUST missed the 2626 comments worth of you sick bastards mercilessly trolling Misty. That must have been glorious!


And though I am a liberal, I'm actually a PC.


Also, my function has been less "Hipster douche," and more of a... "Code Violation and Sanction Robot/ED-209 Ripoff Operator."


I think Paco sold the burnt remains of that thing for scrap. Did he give you your cut, Mort?
2014-05-22 [Sideways]: Also, I'd like to join the [Sunrose] sucks committee.
2014-05-22 [Sheamus Finn]: Your a PC? We must be related I'm IBM compatible!
2014-05-22 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a potatoes!
2014-05-22 [Avaz]: Potatoes are what we call consoles. The name applies to all consoles, but was originally derived from the Xbox logo looking like a baked potato.
#PCMASTERRACE
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Goddamn PC fanboys... *unwraps the tinfoil on his steaming PS3 and starts eating it with bacon bits*
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Someone called for me?
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, they did. *hands [The Black Goat] the phone and goes back to eating his PS3*
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: ..... Hello?
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs and resumes his hearty bacon PS3 with sour cream and chives*... *chews through some wiring with his powerful rat-like jaw*... *puts the jaw back in his desk drawer when he is finished with it*...
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Mort they said its for you.


They want to know where the princess is 0_o
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *takes the phone back*


Uh huh. Uh HUH. Yeah. Okay. Love you too. Bye.


It was a wrong number.


*goes back to chewing a CD drive*
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Mort..... Did you kidnap another princess?
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Not technically, no. Bob's Diner does not recognize royalty.


*the Queen, enraged, pulls out some ceremonial nunchucks and starts twirling them and doing amazing flips*


HEY! Deliveries go around back.


*the Queen goes around back to deliver the ceremonial nunchucks Mort ordered*
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: You shouldn't do that to Mario Mort, poor guys just trying to nap some princess tail :P
2014-05-22 [Scathic N.]: what is this and why was i added?
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Its the diner, Mort's front for illegal princess trafficking XD
2014-05-22 [Scathic N.]: O.O I want an illegal princess :(
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: We need an average of six comments per day from now until the end of the friscal year to beat last year's terrible comment average (of 2.7 comments a day). As of right now, we only have a cpd average of 1.42. Which is bad and probably all someone else's fault.
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Oh me, me!
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: FINE.


*has [The Black Goat] drawn and quartered*


If you want your drawing framed, check the gift shop, we have a lot of nice frames there. And feel free to use your quarters at our Fun Classic Family Space Arcade!


*goes back to working hard behind the register, taking many orders and never once wondering who is supposed to be cooking them all or why there are even customers in the first place*
2014-05-22 [Sheamus Finn]: Can I get my Princess custom? Less whine, more kick ass with loose morals? (lol)
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be $6.99 plus customization fees.


*hands [Sheamus Finn] a cheeseburger that's been sitting on the warmer for six years*


Next!
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Thanks Mort


I designate myself the princess broker XD
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be $6.99 plus designation fees.


*hands [The Black Goat] a hotdog that's been sitting on the warmer for seven years*


*oddly enough, we've only had this warmer for five years*


*and never once plugged it in*


Next!
2014-05-22 [Scathic N.]: *tilts head trying to follow the point*
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: :sticks hotdog into a hole in the wall:


Can I pay you in kitten tongues?
2014-05-22 [Scathic N.]: *wolf ears perk listening*
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be
2014-05-22 [CuteCommander]: ... fine?
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, that'll be $6.99 plus tonguing fees. 


*hands [Scathic N.] a severed arm that's been sitting on the warmer for eight years* 


Next!
2014-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... apparently Elftown didn't like the tongue unicode character I was replacing the "$" with...
2014-05-22 [Nioniel]: Have some comment.


*comment*
2014-05-22 [The Black Goat]: Mort I'm gonna have to charge you repeating post fees, you've gone over your limit XD
2014-05-22 [Scathic N.]: *stands there holding the severed arm intrigued by dark nature by confused by what happened*
2014-05-23 [CuteCommander]: I would comment, but I lack inspiration!
2014-05-23 [The Black Goat]: I'm soooo drunk right now
2014-05-23 [Teufelsweib]: here's a comment
2014-05-23 [Teufelsweib]: boostin' the economy
2014-05-23 [Avaz]: Rollin' in the comments.
2014-05-23 [Avaz]: *takes [Nioniel]'s *comment* and eats it with ketchup.*
2014-05-23 [The Black Goat]: :wakes up on floor covered in black marker and wearing boxing gloves and bunny slippers:




The faque?
2014-05-23 [Sheamus Finn]: *Plays Nox the video*
2014-05-23 [CuteCommander]: *sells the video to the pervert community*
2014-05-23 [The Black Goat]: ...........


I'm so sorry for what I did to that stuffed Bear. It was really uncalled for.
2014-05-23 [Sheamus Finn]: *Teddy is still in the corner curled up crying*
2014-05-23 [CuteCommander]: That wasn't a teddy...
2014-05-23 [Sheamus Finn]: Uh oh..Nox went Furry.....lol
2014-05-23 [The Black Goat]: 0_o'
2014-05-23 [CuteCommander]: It was a dwarf doing cosplay!
2014-05-23 [Sheamus Finn]: I'm conflicted with the amount of awful jokes and terrible puns for that.... O.o
2014-05-23 [Nioniel]: *takes [Avaz]'s ketchup and eats it with comment*
This ketchup needs more ketchup.
2014-05-23 [Scathic N.]: O.O!!! woo furryness.
2014-05-23 [Jadala*(Once upon a moment)]: Sup y'all
2014-05-24 [Scathic N.]: *wriggles to dubstep while watching everyones activities*
2014-05-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *makes one of the six comments needed today*
2014-05-24 [CuteCommander]: *eats the comment and poops it out* Your economy is faeces to me!
2014-05-24 [The Black Goat]: what happens if we make the six comment a day quota?


I would like to demand whatever it is be changed to hookers.
2014-05-24 [CuteCommander]: And clean hookers please, the last lot shrivelled my junk to mere average size
2014-05-24 [The Black Goat]: likely excuse XD


also I demand they be red heads, sexy redheads.
2014-05-24 [CuteCommander]: I third this!
2014-05-24 [Sideways]: I'll go get copies of Heads
2014-05-24 [Sheamus Finn]: I fourth it...
2014-05-24 [The Black Goat]: I have rendered your sarcastic comment invalid!
2014-05-25 [Sideways]: The North Remembers.
2014-05-25 [No.]: The South concurs
2014-05-25 [hanhepi]: Figured I'd show up and try to do my part for the comment count.
2014-05-25 [Tekkon KinKreet]: aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhh! comment count contribution.
2014-05-25 [The Black Goat]: I better get my clean, red headed hookers
2014-05-25 [CuteCommander]: Could you ask them to bring some painkillers? The hangover has finally arrived
2014-05-25 [Scathic N.]: id like ginger hookers :(
2014-05-25 [The Black Goat]: If you ask nicely I might share XD
2014-05-25 [Scathic N.]: *big puppy eyes* bitte, hun?
2014-05-25 [The Black Goat]: I suppose I can share for a little while,but then I'm taking them all back to my house so I can put them in sexy french maid uniforms and lingerie and make them clean my house and pretend to be furniture
2014-05-26 [Scathic N.]: O.O! i wanna watch. *smiles*
2014-05-26 [The Black Goat]: you are here by invited then XD
2014-05-26 [Scathic N.]: *double fist up in the air and smiles* yay!!!! female furniture.
2014-05-26 [The Black Goat]: ^^
2014-05-26 [Scathic N.]: *wags my wolf tail happily*
2014-05-26 [Yami]: Aw, how cute.
2014-05-26 [The Black Goat]: :puts collar on Feinrose:


they will be furniture, you can be my guard dog ^^
2014-05-26 [Scathic N.]: *shakes head taking off the collar* nope. im noones dog, ms beautiful
2014-05-26 [The Black Goat]: awwww but pweeeaasseee????? I'd let you terrify and abuse all the bad men that come through ;)
2014-05-27 [Scathic N.]: lol ill terrift them but im not a dog lol
2014-05-27 [CuteCommander]: I can be a guard cat *licks own balls*
2014-05-27 [The Black Goat]: Alright Fein can be my body guard and CC is my kitten cat
2014-05-27 [Nuktae-tal]: I have cats! They are nice. I ate my feet. And now my back hurts
2014-05-27 [The Black Goat]: Poor dear, have some mustard.
2014-05-27 [Avaz]: Pacodammit, Nox, this shit is yellow mustard. Where's the Grey Poupon like I requested?
2014-05-27 [The Black Goat]: Sorry, I had it stored for safe keeping, just bend over, spread your legs and insert your arm into your rear, its about elbow deep I think, off to the left and across from the wasabi :)
2014-05-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *pours mustard in hair* aaahhhh that feels much better thanks. *Walks away into a wall.*
2014-05-28 [Sideways]: I just saw Godzilla. Actually, I think it was Jurassic Park 4....wait....yeah, yeah it was actually Battle of San Francisco/Hawaii/Tokyo. No...wait...I remember Godzilla actually being on screen at the very end. It might have been Battleship 2 though. I think I should check my ticket stub.
2014-05-28 [Scathic N.]: I can do that
2014-05-28 [Avaz]: You can check the ticket stub for [Sideways]? How nice of you.
2014-05-28 [The Black Goat]: I'm going to have to charge you ticket stub checking fees then :)
2014-05-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *steals nox's wallet*
2014-05-28 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm gonna have to charge you a wallet stealing fee.


*steals [The Black Goat]'s wallet and takes out $20 to cover his own wallet stealing fees and an extra $15 for his troubles*


*returns it to [Nuktae-tal]*


I examined the wallet and it has $5 in it, which you can probably use as a down payment for your $25 wallet stealing fee. It should cover most of the interest on your fee, leaving you with a mere $30 left to pay. Before sundown.


*casually cleans his debt collection pistol*
2014-05-29 [Sunrose]: I'm pretty sure you stole this 'show content' idea from my house..!
2014-05-29 [The Black Goat]: Dun dun dun!
2014-05-29 [Nuktae-tal]: *eats wallet* I stole nothing! You cannot prove anything without evidence!
2014-05-30 [Sideways]: We need more comments ! I have money in B's D stock!
2014-05-30 [Sideways]:   
2014-05-30 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: So does this :P
2014-05-30 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: as does this *_*
2014-05-30 [Tekkon KinKreet]: 0b1
2014-05-30 [The Black Goat]: I don't trust stalks or bondage XD
2014-05-31 [CuteCommander]: *opens gimp mask zipper to talk* What? No bondage?!
2014-05-31 [The Black Goat]: :smacks CC:


GIMPS SHOULD BE SEEN AND NOT HEARD!
2014-05-31 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm going to dance like the spice girls now! *listens to country music*
2014-05-31 [Nuktae-tal]: Also... I love all of you. You are like my own fairy friends. You make me giggle and smile.
2014-05-31 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: *Leans against the wall watching everyone and listening to whatever is playing on his IPod*
2014-05-31 [Sheamus Finn]: Which spice Corundum? or Saffron?
2014-06-01 [Sideways]:   



This spice.
2014-06-01 [Sideways]: I swear, I will return the fad of meme pics on Bob's Diner even if it kills Mort
2014-06-01 [The Black Goat]: oohhh if it does can I get it on camera?
2014-06-01 [Tekkon KinKreet]: that... that is a scary looking woman...
2014-06-01 [The Black Goat]: Well she is scary spice XD


But I'd tap that anyway
2014-06-01 [CuteCommander]: Mmfummmmfum mmmmfummmmfmmfmmummm
2014-06-01 [The Black Goat]: Hush CC, or I'll have to shove a gerbil back up your rump
2014-06-01 [Sheamus Finn]: The gerbil is dead...got plenty of raccoons and Pacos though.
2014-06-01 [The Black Goat]: and honey badgers?
2014-06-01 [Sheamus Finn]: On back order...
2014-06-01 [Tekkon KinKreet]: are they scary as scary spice?
2014-06-01 [The Black Goat]: No, not nearly as scary XD
2014-06-02 [Sideways]:   
2014-06-02 [The Black Goat]: Damn!
2014-06-02 [CuteCommander]: Muffmmmm!
2014-06-06 [JINKS MAN]: WHAT!?
2014-06-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Muffmmmm.
2014-06-07 [The Black Goat]: No CC you may not have a pony ride, and yea Mort, you may paddle Jinks Man and then charge him for it 
2014-06-08 [Scathic N.]: so i still dont understand what all this is for at all. anyone care to explain?
2014-06-08 [The Black Goat]: Nope. now could you please use the jumper cables on CC's ears?
2014-06-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, basically, Bob's Diner is a place where deliveries go around back.


*goes back to circling want ads for cashiers at other restaurants*
2014-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Fuck you man, fuck you man, I don't give a fuck you can...


Go fuck yourself and stop sending me invites to your annoying ass wiki!


  

2014-06-10 [The Black Goat]: Lol
2014-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]:
One last thing to post...


  

2014-06-10 [Sideways]:   
2014-06-10 [~Crimson Angel~]: Yeah, but I'm the P-H-A-T kind; Pretty, Hot And Thick.


So go suck on a lemon sour puss.
2014-06-10 [The Black Goat]: Reminds me of helsing abridged
2014-06-11 [Sideways]:   
DragonBallZ Abridged
The only Team Four Star series that matters.
2014-06-11 [The Black Goat]: Dz was so dumb to begin with I couldn't even sit through it all
2014-06-11 [Avaz]: At least you haven't suffered through the live action movie version. *shudder*
2014-06-11 [The Black Goat]: I sadly did. Dear god I just wanted to forget. WHY DID YOU REMIND ME?!?!?!!!
2014-06-11 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: Db Evolution was ok, but it could have been made better
2014-06-11 [CuteCommander]: At least you haven't had to watch the ET porno...
2014-06-11 [The Black Goat]: Hmmmmmmm? Do tell
2014-06-11 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: ?
2014-06-11 [Sheamus Finn]: ??
2014-06-12 [Avaz]: ???
2014-06-12 [The Black Goat]: QUESTION MARK!!!!!!!!!!
2014-06-12 [Sheamus Finn]: Why? what did Mark do?
2014-06-12 [The Black Goat]: He stole an old tigers wheelchair and at. Now the tiger is sad.
2014-06-12 [Stephen]: Poor Tiger.
2014-06-12 [The Black Goat]: Exactly. Shame on Mark!
2014-06-12 [Sideways]:   



And he's already getting raped by Mort 's cat
2014-06-12 [The Black Goat]: Fake lol
2014-06-12 [The Black Goat]:   


Now this guys got his rape face on XD
2014-06-16 [Nuktae-tal]: All the rape!!
2014-06-18 [Nuktae-tal]: Grawr! I am all the rape.
2014-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Mark really does get into some messed up stuff: Kooh Estion Mark



He prefers to be called "Kooh" though.


*Mark looks up from his soup and shakes his head "no"*


Yeah, it's definitely "Kooh".
2014-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, here is Bob's Diner as depicted in some classic [Sir Soapy]/[garfield the cat] comics:   
2014-06-19 [The Black Goat]: PSH you wish Nuk.


Y'all should see my blog XD
2014-06-19 [Sideways]: I always imagined it like a New York, brick masoned, street level diner. There are windows, but they are broken. There are walls, but some are crumbling, leaving gaping holes open to the smog and loud traffic outside. There are surfaces, but they are filthy. The floor could be tile, linoleum, or concrete. You don't know, there's too much toxic slime, radioactive waste, and burnt, crusty mystery materials to know for sure.


Mort is usually there, sitting on some sort of fucked up, half bent office stool, with his feet kicked all the way up on the pie display case, which is like two feet above his head. He's reading the paper by peering intently through a single gold monocle he obviously stole from someone.


The pie case is full of spiders , by the way. And not much else. There's a stove and frier behind that case, but a thick cloud of smoke obscures whatever might be cooking there. Sometimes it appear like Paco might be back there, fruitlessly spraying bleach on things and trying to scrub them . Other times it looks like a portal to an alternate dimension that [Sagacious Turkey] enters the building from .


[Sagacious Turkey], by the way, looks like a dude who has too much plastic surgeries and spray on tans. He has big Ray-Ban sunglasses, and a purple, supremely tackey Hawaiian shirt on. This is because he's retired to some cosmic paradise island thanks to all the money he embezzled from Bob's a few years ago.


There's plenty of tables and booths in the front section of the diner, but they're all that shitty ass, cheap kind you see at a Subway, or Panera Bread, or Quiznos. These are almost always packed with people. These customers are a cosmopolitan lot. Children, adults, seniors of all ages and ethnicities, neatly segregated by race and social caste. The one thing all the customers have in common is a facial expression of intense trepidation and anxiety . They have the look of feral prey animals and beaten pets. In some of them , there is little or no life left in their eyes, and despair is universal. It's as if they're only there because their damned souls were on a field trip from Hell.


Near the front counter and register (the register, no matter what, always flashes 12:00 incessantly , as if it was a VCR and not a cash register,) there are some booths that still have some frayed upholstery on them, unlike the splintered iron maidens the customers sit on, and these are the reserved seats of Bob's VIP patrons, like [CuteCommander], [Nuktae-tal] and Tony Danza.


And there isn't a dumpster around back. There is a looming, bleached-white castle of bone made out of delivery boys and other dumbasses who foolishly went "around back." I have no idea what lives in this castle, and I don't care to find out. o-o
2014-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner has been established as having a dumpster, no roof, walls, or floors (except when it spontaneously does), a lot of nonsensical rule posters on the wall, a weapon rack, a kitchen, 200+ bathrooms, a cesspool, a furnace, a gang of chickens, a gang of lions, 200+ Pacos, a transport tractor, a basement full of zombies, a bar, a bunch of tables with booths and/or chairs, a daycare center, an arcade, 200+ corners, a ramen closet, a freezer full of hookers, 200+ stories, that same kitchen I already mentioned, an office, and a huge homeless problem. Especially since all those houses were mysteriously burned down to make room for those additional 200+ bathrooms.
2014-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: And we're also located in the Middle East/middle of the ocean/deep in the jungle/in a barren wasteland.
2014-06-19 [Sheamus Finn]: So, basically it's located in New York?
2014-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Sort of. It's around the New York/Alabama/Mexico/Sweden border somewhere, I believe.
2014-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: You know, that one border that runs vertically through all those, going East to West? That big black one on the map? Yeah, that's the one.
2014-06-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *walks the big black line* rrrrraaaapppeeee!!! Half off!!
2014-07-07 [SoulOfSet]: *checks my map of ley lines* You know its all coming together somehow.
2014-07-09 [Sideways]: I AIN'T SAYING SHE A GOLD DIGGER...
2014-07-09 [Sheamus Finn]: But, you are saying she's a miner of some sort?
2014-07-10 [Avaz]: Could be a minor miner, too.
2014-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs a dirt covered little girl and starts violently shaking her*


Where are my blood diamonds?!


"But this is a gold mine, sir!"


NO MORE EXCUSES! *lifts her over his head and hurls her violently down the mine shaft, probably causing explosions or something, but I wouldn't know, having wandered off bored after the first bounce*
2014-07-12 [CuteCommander]: I didn't know I was a VIP guest of the diner *completely missed the red carpet, VIP badge, picture of honour on the wall, and Paco gently rimming him*
2014-07-13 [Sideways]: Oh, yeah! You are totally a V.I.P. of Bob's Diner! Here's your VIP ID card! *hands CC a laminate containing a tracking device currently monitored in the NSA database as the sim card of a cell phone of a high ranking jihadi terrorist.*
2014-07-23 [Nekko fox]:   
2014-07-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: Whoah just notice d I'm in the top fifty commentators... I don't remember posting so much.
2014-07-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: Lol then again... It's only out of seventy five... I'm a terrible commenter -_-
2014-07-23 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *commits suicide*
2014-07-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *Joins*
2014-07-23 [Stephen]: I've commented here far too often.   
2014-07-23 [Sheamus Finn]: Or not enough...
2014-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably not enough.
2014-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Not nearly enough.
2014-07-24 [Sideways]: Starring Jennifer Lopez.
2014-07-24 [Stephen]: She has a large rear end, if I recall.
2014-07-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: Starring j- lo's rear end instead then? All in favor say aye!
2014-07-24 [Nuktae-tal]: I offer my breasticles! *removes some of my boobs*
2014-07-24 [CuteCommander]: We DEFINITELY need to comment more to make quota. P.S. That is a superbly pleased penis. Pass it promptly
2014-07-24 [Nuktae-tal]: Is that a new game? Pass teh penis?
2014-07-24 [Sheamus Finn]: Yep, and you are penis-lized for using hands....
2014-07-24 [Nekko fox]: Delicious penis.
2014-07-24 [Stephen]: This is the second time in a week I've wished there was a facepalm emoticon. :P
2014-07-24 [Avaz]: There has been a facepalm emoticon in use for many years! (/)_-)
2014-07-24 [Stephen]: xD
I mean the Elftown emoticons.   
2014-07-24 [Avaz]: Oh, that. Yeah, agreed. It would be much used. :D
2014-07-24 [Sideways]: 8=====))D:


That's the emoticon, right?
2014-07-24 [Avaz]: That's just a smiling face 8=====)) with a really long nose whose chin is touching another person's D: face.




Or it's a penis with a piercing in the glans.
2014-07-24 [Sheamus Finn]:   
2014-07-24 [Sideways]:   
2014-07-24 [Sideways]:   
Fuck this thread!
2014-07-24 [Nuktae-tal]: *humps Sheamus* Yeah Moo! Moo like the Fairy you are!
2014-07-24 [Nekko fox]: MOO BITCH! MOO LIKE YOUR MISTRESS DEMANDS.
2014-07-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: *looks for a cow thinking dinner had arrived*
2014-07-24 [Stephen]: What is that gif from?
2014-07-24 [Tekkon KinKreet]: That's link is it not? Using the lightning medallion and/or his spin technique
2014-07-25 [Sideways]: It's a commercial for Legend of Zelda: Link to the Past from Japan.
2014-07-25 [Sideways]:   


Typical Japanese WTF action.
2014-07-25 [Nuktae-tal]: *Rapes Japan*
2014-07-26 [Stephen]: That Link looks like a female to me.
Weird.
2014-07-26 [Sideways]: That's because the actor is a teenage girl. Link looks like a girl anyways. It's like Peter Pan. The actor is always a girl. Because link is an androgynous fruity little wood nymph.
2014-07-26 [CuteCommander]: And that's how we like him/her
2014-07-26 [Nekko fox]:   
2014-07-26 [Nekko fox]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0m9QUoW5KnY
2014-07-26 [Stephen]: I... never realized that about Link.
2014-07-26 [Nekko fox]: no one ever does...
2014-07-26 [Tekkon KinKreet]: In almost every story I'm pretty sure link is hylian... So human.
2014-07-26 [CuteCommander]: M'yeeeahh I'd tap Link
2014-07-27 [Sideways]: Real gays want Gannon. You know he got that booty.
2014-07-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2014-07-27 [Nekko fox]:   
2014-07-27 [Nuktae-tal]: his stubble is bleeding...
2014-07-27 [Stephen]: Wow, that's a lot of shaving accidents.
2014-07-27 [Nekko fox]: Nah, just the power of desert gingers burning through his skin.
2014-07-28 [Nuktae-tal]: WWWOOOOOOOOWWWWW! *does same with butt*
2014-07-28 [Sideways]: XD!
2014-07-28 [Nekko fox]: So, instead of fire-crotch, you've got fire butt? Awesome!
2014-07-28 [Avaz]: That sound painful. And possibly explosive.
2014-07-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2014-07-28 [Avaz]: That jet of flame is 90 degrees off, anatomically speaking. It should be fired at the rock he just launched from.
2014-07-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *flames around restaurant*
2014-07-29 [Avaz]: Fabulous!
2014-07-29 [Nekko fox]:   
2014-07-30 [Sideways]:   
2014-07-30 [Nekko fox]: *watches as the Paco's run off with the majority of the diamonds*


*the diamonds are crack*


The police are involved*
2014-07-30 [Sideways]: Nigger Jim says



"You put those diamonds down, Paco."
2014-07-30 [Nekko fox]: Paco says


  



Oh shit, we got a baboon problem.
2014-07-30 [Nuktae-tal]: *takes photo's of everything.*
2014-07-30 [Avaz]: *takes the extraneous apostrophe*
2014-07-30 [Stephen]: So much taking. You should be giving.
2014-07-30 [Avaz]: Giving is for suckers who want to get on Santa's nice list. And for philanthropic endeavors. And for the betterment of humanity.


Well, shit.
2014-07-30 [Sideways]: Nigger Jim also says

2014-07-30 [Nuktae-tal]: *digs up a sucker*
2014-07-30 [Sheamus Finn]: *Stares in horror* That's not a sucker....it's a cat turd on a stick!!
2014-07-30 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: HA!!
2014-07-31 [CuteCommander]: I was wondering where I'd left that turd *chews absently*
2014-08-02 [Stephen]: Cookies.
2014-08-02 [Sideways]: No, Booker T's.
2014-08-02 [Nuktae-tal]: I love Hookers! I'll take mine squirming please!
2014-08-02 [Sideways]: Next up, Hooker T vs Brock Lesbian in a Super Drag Slut match!
2014-08-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *Brock Lesbian starts tying sluts to the back of his pickup truck to be dragged*
2014-08-02 [Stephen]: That sounds dangerous.   
2014-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry, Brock Lesbian is totally wearing a helmet.
2014-08-03 [Sideways]: His helmet is made out of Cena

2014-08-03 [CuteCommander]: Special referee: Hulk Hymen!
2014-08-03 [Sideways]: And joining us ringside at the announcer's table is the champ, "Menstrual Man" Randy Cabbage!
2014-08-03 [Nekko fox]: *Gentle booing from a single spectator follows a limply thrown shower of stadium popcorn*
2014-08-03 [Nuktae-tal]: *spits out drink from nose*
2014-08-03 [CuteCommander]: Oh my god! It's the Clunge-a-taker! And he's performing his signature move - THE POON-BONE!
2014-08-03 [Sideways]: Of course he is interrupted by The Big Ho, Dolph Diddler, Knob van Bam, Cooter Rains, Daniel Wide-end, Squirt Angle, Taint,
*deep breath* Alex Gotback, The Jizz, Randy Horntoad, Cody Chodes, Ream MyhairyHole, Eddie Heranal, Chavo Heranal, *deep breath* Wam-Bam Giggalo, "The Raper Boy" Dic Flair, Geldberg,  Bret "The Shitman" Fart, Dudeherpoot Hairerra, Nutting Codgers, and Gnarly Gayce!


A prize for anyone who can decipher all those
2014-08-04 [Nuktae-tal]: *deciphers* cornbread lasagna and macaroni!
2014-08-04 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: What?! Captain Cornhole is the special guest ref?! Alright!
2014-08-05 [Sideways]: Obviously no true wrestling fans around. You cultureless pigs!
2014-08-05 [Sheamus Finn]: Wrastlin' ain't culture...it's guy soap operas....and ballet!
2014-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Operas and ballets sound pretty cultured.
2014-08-05 [Avaz]: Yes, it's ballet where the orchestra is the squared circle (whatever that means), and the composition is the sound of clotheslines and bodyslams. And the superfluous announcers being unnecessarily overexcited.
2014-08-06 [Stephen]: That's a very apt description and comparison.
2014-08-06 [Stephen]: I remember when I use to come to this page and would have an entire new page worth of comments to read, which I'd end up not reading. x)
2014-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't worry, I'll be spamming B's D like Elftown has never seen in the very near future. We're 25 days away from the 10 year anniversary and are falling way behind this friscal year.
2014-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a good chance I'm going to cross some lines and get banned before this month is over.
2014-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I've already literally invited every single member of Elftown here, but that's clearly not enough!
2014-08-06 [Sideways]: Elftown is clearly like Kansas. As in nobody lives here anymore except for a few old, weird assholes. :P
2014-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, old, weird assholes are my fetish.
2014-08-06 [Stephen]: Er, try not to get banned. :P
2014-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: We'll see!
2014-08-06 [Stephen]: Now if you get banned, who's going to call me out randomly and put me in a slightly-awkward situation by clashing my personal responses with my professional responses? x)
2014-08-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Probably that [perfumed ignition] chick.


I hear she's pretty hot.
2014-08-06 [Stephen]: They'd ban her with you.   
2014-08-06 [Avaz]:   
2014-08-06 [Sheamus Finn]: You can always tell the one who farts in a group...
2014-08-06 [Stephen]: The guy smiling creeps me out. x)
2014-08-06 [Avaz]: How about this instead?
  

2014-08-06 [Stephen]: That's probably worse.. xD


He looks like a psychopath with that blank look and big creepy smile.
2014-08-06 [Sheamus Finn]: At least he ditched the ascot...
2014-08-07 [Dainty Delusive Doll]: Had to use something to tie up the dead hooker
2014-08-07 [Avaz]: Paco, our last shipment of Unidentified Meat is late. Find out what happened!
2014-08-07 [Stephen]: I wonder if that's where the dead hookers go. ):
2014-08-07 [Nekko fox]: Nah, dead hookers are doused in kerosene and introduced to a well-lit match. It's the most environmentally friendly thing to do.
2014-08-07 [Avaz]: Tyrion's question has been answered. Dead hookers go on the B's D menu.
2014-08-07 [Sheamus Finn]: Dead Hooker Flambe? OR Fire Roasted Crabs?
2014-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Dead dwarfs go in the soup.
2014-08-07 [CuteCommander]: What happens to dead intelligent apes?
2014-08-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Soup.
2014-08-08 [Nuktae-tal]: In authentic skull bowls!!
2014-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I put those in the soup too.
2014-08-08 [Sideways]: Fuck yo soup, Penguin!
2014-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from thrusting into his salad*


In a minute.
2014-08-08 [Avaz]: Thrust faster! We're running low on creamy garlic dressing.
2014-08-08 [Stephen]: Oh man, the images.


DoNotNeed.   
2014-08-08 [Avaz]: My work here is done.


/flies away
2014-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: HHHHHHNNNNNGGGGHH!


*furiously coats his salad in his special creamy garlic dipping sauce*


*licks his fingers*


Y'know, this is like the third time I've implied having sex with a salad here... Either things are getting repetitive or I must have some sort of bizarre new fetish. But... No, things don't get repetitive here...


*eats ramen*


Deliveries go around back.
2014-08-08 [Avaz]: Great work. Now, do you need someone to help toss your salad, or can you do that yourself?
2014-08-08 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws salad at Mort.* I wanted Krill SALADEN!!!!!! *get naked and runs through the kitchen rubbing on everything* do the twist!!
2014-08-08 [Stephen]: I'm sure Mort is able to toss his own salad.   
2014-08-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course I am. But Paco needs to learn his place.


*hands a sobbing Paco some chapstick and some salad tongs*
2014-08-09 [CuteCommander]: Paco is needed helping me make the Tim Curry
2014-08-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *bites CuteCommander* This is not rare!
2014-08-12 [CuteCommander]: Careful who you bite, they might just enjoy it...
2014-08-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *bites again* Good? Nuk is good?
2014-08-12 [Sheamus Finn]: Make sure she's had her shots....she is a wild Nuk after all.
2014-08-12 [CuteCommander]: Do you really think it's wise I get her drunk while she nibbles me?
2014-08-12 [Nuktae-tal]: I LOVE MOOSE!!! *Licks CuteCommander's belly button*
2014-08-12 [Avaz]: I love moose knuckle, which is slightly different.
2014-08-12 [CuteCommander]: *squirts from his bellybutton while moaning ecstatically* Ah, my pussy/bellybutton!
2014-08-12 [Nuktae-tal]: Mousey NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! *right hands fall off and falls into the soup bowl* USE THE FOCUS!!!
2014-08-12 [Avaz]: *A Ford Focus crashes through the front window and lands in the center water fountain*


*that's not water*
2014-08-12 [Stephen]: Well, at least this place is never boring. :P
2014-08-12 [Avaz]: True, but who's gonna fix the window?
2014-08-12 [Nuktae-tal]: WE have windows!? *runs through an unbroken window*
2014-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: There are are walls?!


*runs through an unbroken wall*


*spends many weeks in the hospital, recovering from his coma*
2014-08-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *Steals littlefingers food and cable leaving him the bill from the hospital*
2014-08-13 [Sheamus Finn]: *Pimps Littlefinger's hospital bed* See spinners work for everything & that purple with pink zebra stripes look sharp!
2014-08-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *cuts self* ME BLOOD! ARRRRHHHH
2014-08-13 [Avaz]: *Count von Count shows up and counts the platelets in [Nuktae-tal]'s spewing blood.* One, two, three, ah! ah! ah!
2014-08-13 [Sheamus Finn]: Ah, VAMPIRE MUPPET!!! *Pulls out spray can and lighter burning the Count*
2014-08-13 [Avaz]: *Animal shows up behind [Sheamus Finn] and replenishes the lighter supply* MAHNA MAHNA.
2014-08-14 [CuteCommander]: Doo doo do-do-do *hides sulphuric acid amongst the soda bottles*
2014-08-18 [Susie-Q]: Hearing the distress from inside the room the doctor does 40cc's of morpheme writes himself a prescription for oxycontin and congradulates the coke bottles on their sustaining valor in the marketing war with Pepsi before overdosing as he sings cakes rendition of I will survive
2014-08-22 [Nekko fox]: *Comes barging in, riding the backs of several ham beasts and landwhales like a blubbery raft of sweaty, wheezing meat*


Split yer lungs with blood and thunder!


*He has his creatures trample several tables before they collapse from the effort, heaving as they grab handfuls of fries from the collapses tables*
2014-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *slowly takes down the sign for the buffet*
2014-08-23 [Nekko fox]: *watches placidly as they start chewing through the floor molding*
2014-08-23 [Sideways]: Break your backs and crack your oars men!
2014-08-23 [CuteCommander]: *cracks my back and breaks my oars* For the Emperor!
2014-08-23 [Nekko fox]: For Chaos!


*Hauls on the reigns of his ham beasts with no noticeable effect*


*Halls the reigns instead*


The Reigns Display in the Mort. Peng. Hall of Commemorative Hall will be open until 5 pm eastern standard time. Please pick up your complimentary headphones before entering the hall.
2014-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *the headphones politely compliment customers*


The Rains Display should be fascinating. I hear there's a whole section of the Hall devoted to monsoons.


*there isn't*


*just severe plumbing issues*
2014-08-23 [Nekko fox]: *The Hall of Reigns is the basement*


*Pacos are nailed decoratively to every surface*


*Lilting music and candlelight add to the ambiance of a comfortable, welcoming hall*
2014-08-24 [Nuktae-tal]: *Throws popcorn*
2014-08-25 [Nekko fox]: *the popcorn is vacuum sucked into the gaping maws of one of the tethered landwhales. A Paco is dragged screaming into the ebon abyss that is it's mouth*


*the landwhale is given a 'Custodian of the Hour' award. It then eats the award. It then passes out from hunger*
2014-08-25 [CuteCommander]: Dems some fiiiiine bitch asses
2014-08-25 [Nekko fox]: You should take it out to dinner.
2014-08-27 [Sideways]: Tooty Fruity! Oh Rudy... wait.
I got it!


Echo Gecko! Oh, Nekko. You should take me out to dinner. No wait, I'd rather take that lewd drawing of that fox out to dinner. Or... which one am I talking to? The anthro fox or that foppish Dr. Who wannabe?
2014-08-27 [Nekko fox]: The Dr. Foppish Fox Anthro wannabe.


Duh.
2014-08-27 [Avaz]: Dr. Foppish has a degree in stimulation. He can get you off without you even know it happened.
2014-08-27 [Sideways]: I should hope not! I like a bit of foreplay and a show first!
2014-08-27 [Avaz]: Don't we all...
2014-08-27 [Teufelsweib]: not if you like it dry
2014-08-27 [Avaz]: Like necrophiliacs.
2014-08-27 [Teufelsweib]: or sandpeople
2014-08-27 [Avaz]: Right. All sorts of people like it dry. There's something for everyone here at B's D!
2014-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Except parking.
2014-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *props his feet up on the register and reads a totally real magazine that's really real and definitely not a fake cover made in some kind of computer design class, which, by the way, is really a misnomer, because not once did I even get to design my own computer*


  

2014-08-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Wow, look at these very professional looking ads!


  



That sure looks stupid, but damn, it was professionally made!


  



And what a classy bicycle ad this may or may not be!


  



What an inspirational ad! I would totally buy whatever product it's selling!
2014-08-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm pretty sure that's a dinosaur ad.


And an effective one at that, I just placed an order for six dinosaurs after reading it!


*waits patiently by his mailbox for his dinosaurs to arrive*
2014-08-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *opens the mailbox*


*six tiny archosaurs scurry about inside, eating and shitting on several unpaid bills and a letter addressed to [Pillowthief] marked "extremely urgent" and dated 5-12-2009 from [Mortified Penguin] in regard to "that thing I sent you"*


Huh, I guess they haven't arrived yet...


*sighs and continues waiting*
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *Jumps out of the mailbox in a T-Rex suit.* RAWR!!! I'm gonna each you! *licks The Spiders cheek*
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: What the hell is this shit?! I ordered Sauropodomorphs, not some trashy ass Theropods! If I wanted some stupid ass primarily carnivorous Chordate surviving into the first part of the Cenozoic Era, I'd just get a goddamn mammal!


FUCK, I'M SO ANGRY! *casually sips his Arnold Palmer with the tea substituted with vodka, the lemonade substituted with rum, and the ice cubes substituted with grain alcohol, the classiest of all the alcohols*


*calmly, yet violently, hurls [Nuktae-tal] into the furnace*
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *oils self up inside the fire* I love a good roast!
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws his Arnold Palmer into the furnace, causing a large explosion*


HEY, STOP EXPLODING IN THERE, THEROPOD SCUM!


*throws a second Arnold Palmer into the furnace*


*he screams and never plays golf again*
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: I will wear his skin and plays for him!! *wears his skin and wreaks his life and spends all his money on pincher claws.* Wheeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Now, I may be wrong on this, but I'm pretty sure Arnold Palmer already had pincher claws.


Though, that may have been Jack Nicklaus...
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *pinches Spiders nose* Got your nose!!!
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *grabs a spare nose from his nose jar*


Heh, and my therapist told me I was crazy for keeping a jar of noses on me at all times... right up until I took his lips. Didn't say much more after that.
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *kisses lips then puts back, and blows Spiders nose* I say much a lot!!
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: NO YOU DON'T. I've been watching you closely for 10 years now and you've only said "much" 1,435 times.
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: I have a Stalker?!?!?!??! That's so much cooler than being a stalker! I mean I love Stalking so much don't get me wrong but I've never had my own stalker! Let me sign your Butt! *pulls out tattoo gun and pulls down Spiders pants*
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: I already have your name tramp stamped across my forehead.


And you have bad taste in stalkees. That guy you were stalking while I was stalking you last week was a real creep. I think he was following some girl around.
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: That's why I gave him the AIDS! And also the crabs!
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Those were lobsters. And I'm pretty sure he enjoyed them very much.
2014-08-28 [Nekko fox]: Lobster is our special this evening. If you all will come into the main dining hall


*indicates a recently demolished wall leading into the women's restroom, previously a converted automotive care facility*


Take your places by the buckets and we will begin our main event, Bobbing for Lobster.


2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: I took the bandaids off their claws!!! CLAWS!!!
2014-08-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Those Bandaids were the side dish.
2014-08-28 [Avaz]: Now I can't make my famous Bandaid Pot Pie like I was looking forward to making >_<
2014-08-28 [Nuktae-tal]: I have rubber bands! And old t-shirts!!! *eats a filet mignon
2014-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh shi- I think there's like 7 hours until the technical end of the friscal year.
2014-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: B's D is turning 10 today!




  

2014-08-30 [The Crimsonwolf of the Hidden Leaf]: cool lol
2014-08-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Though, traditionally, the friscal year lasts until the end of the day. So there's still plenty of time to get the average up!
2014-08-30 [shadowfire09]: ....am I too late for lobster?
2014-08-31 [Stephen]: o3o


So few comments.
2014-08-31 [Stephen]: ... >_>


Poor diner.
2014-08-31 [CuteCommander]: I missed the birthday. That was entirely intentional. I was masturbating in the closet. I didn't mean to say that out loud.
2014-08-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: I was way too drunk for this shit.
2014-09-01 [Nuktae-tal]: I was celebrating having my baby at my house and stewing up roadkill with some side of neighbors dog.... it counts as honoring right?
2014-09-01 [Nuktae-tal]: I will post more from now on I promise!
2014-09-01 [Nekko fox]: You're a liar and a scoundrel and I love it.
2014-09-01 [Yami]: Attention! Kumquat! That is all.
2014-09-02 [Sideways]:   


A horrible double rape/homicide happened last night. This was the last photo taken by one of the victim's phone.


We know what you did, Mort
2014-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: So I eat phones. Don't judge me.
2014-09-02 [Nuktae-tal]: HOW DID YOU GET A PICTURE OF ME?!?!?!
2014-09-02 [CuteCommander]: I always take a picture of the people who rape me. And then add them to my album labelled 'Precious Memories'. You're in there at least 12 times, Nuktae
2014-09-03 [Nuktae-tal]: oh good otherwise you wouldn't be a very good stalker would you CC? *hops on killer whale and leads an attack on Hawaii*
2014-09-04 [Nekko fox]: *watches as the morbidly obese parent is ridden to an island in the pacific. No one realizes that it has finished killing and eating one of Nuktae-tal's second cousin*
2014-09-12 [shadowfire09]: I've been sitting at this damn table for two weeks and still have no lobster. What kind of service is this.
2014-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks in wearing his "I hate everybody" sign, apparently*
2014-09-12 [Mortified Penguin]: The lobster shrub isn't in bloom yet, keep waiting.
2014-09-12 [shadowfire09]: Fine. I need booze then.
2014-09-15 [Stephen]: Poor Diner.


The comment currency is declining.
2014-09-17 [kians mummy]: So true
2014-09-17 [Avaz]: It's this damn inflation. Pacos aren't worth as much today as they used to be.
2014-09-17 [shadowfire09]: That and the service isn't so great. ;)
2014-09-19 [Imperator]: I'm just wandering in after another year of being out of town. What have I missed? *diner is empty* Huh... *looks outside at Mainstreet... a lonely wind blows through the deserted avenue*
2014-09-19 [shadowfire09]: Diner is not empty! I'm still waiting on booze and lobster
2014-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: AND I TOLD YOU THE SHRUB ISN'T IN BLOOM YET.
2014-09-20 [shadowfire09]: REGARDLESS of the circumstances, I'M STILL WAITING
2014-09-20 [Sideways]: BACK OFF before Mort makes you the new MISTY
2014-09-20 [shadowfire09]: -shrinks back in booth- I don't know what that means, but it doesn't sound pleasant
2014-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: No, nothing about being Misty sounds pleasant.
2014-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Or smells pleasant.
2014-09-20 [shadowfire09]: -whimpers- I don't wanna be misty at all.
Unless I get to help catch them all
2014-09-20 [Sideways]: Misty only catches this one.


  

2014-09-21 [shadowfire09]: ...I don't wanna be misty,
2014-09-21 [Sideways]: No you don't. Now get your fuckin' Shine Box.
2014-09-21 [shadowfire09]: -gets shiney shoe box.- is this what you mean?
2014-09-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks whale* I love Banana's!
2014-09-29 [Avaz]: A banana's what? Your sentence is incomplete without a subject.
2014-10-01 [Nuktae-tal]: I'll give you a subject!! Monkey testicles!
2014-10-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Deliveries go around back.
2014-10-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: DIDN'T YOU HEAR HIM?! *grabs Avaz by the ascot and starts shaking him violently*


HE SAID THE LIVER TREES HAVE GONE BLACK, WHY DIDN'T YOU WATER THEM?! WHY?!


*points angrily at the chore board, that clearly states it is [Sagacious Turkey]'s turn to water the liver trees*


WHY?!
2014-10-09 [Avaz]: Because a woodchuck could chuck as much wood as a woodchuck could, if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
2014-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Woodchucks go around back. Along with any wood they may have chucked, assuming a woodchuck could chuck wood. But would a woodchuck chuck wood if that woodchuck could? I bet that woodchuck would chuck wood if that woodchuck could. But he can't. So put the goddamn woodchucks around back already and go get table seven some more firewood, their candle is starting to go out.


*points at a pile of smoldering ashes and charred corpses*
2014-10-09 [shadowfire09]: The woodchuck would chop wood if you paid him a decent wage you cheap bastard. Nobody works for free.
2014-10-09 [Sideways]: *Paco starts angrily mopping the faces of customers in a show of passive aggression... For some reason*
2014-10-09 [Avaz]: *A Show of Passive Aggression is a blockbuster Broadway smash hit*
2014-10-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in, chewing a woodchuck*


Didn't we fire/deport/murder Paco several times already?
2014-10-10 [Sheamus Finn]: Sorry, the cloner keeps spiting out new Pacos. *4 new pacos come out and eat random customers*
2014-10-10 [CuteCommander]: Fuck off, Paco Zwei, that's my arm *retrieves arm from the dribbling Paco clone and munches on it*
2014-10-10 [Sideways]: Oh no. Dammit, Sheamus! You've started a zombie Apocolypse storyline!
2014-10-10 [Sheamus Finn]: *Shoots 2 Pacos and 1 Customer* Yee Haw, take out 2 Pacos and 1 possible Paco virus sufferer!
2014-10-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *a doctor looks up from his platter of surgical tools*


"I... I don't think that's how that works. Firstly, clones are not zombies. Secondly, I don't think being bitten by a clone turns you into a zombie. And thir-"


*he explodes*


*Mort puts his shotgun back down*


He was coming right at me. Goddamn zombies!
2014-10-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *rides Paco like a pony* YEE HAW!
2014-10-13 [Sheamus Finn]: *Shoots the Paco Nuktae-tal was riding* Sorry Ma'am he was rabid had to put'em down... *Shoots another Paco and a Senator* Them were too....
2014-10-13 [Imperator]: I... I... I'm the 21st highest commenter???
*is intentionally shot by a stray bullet*
2014-10-13 [Kalma]: *walks into the diner and looks around* Looks like someone here called the clean up service? You kill 'em, you grill 'em, we arson the building quietly for insurance purposes?
2014-10-13 [Sunrose]: Yuuhuu 49 heh :P
2014-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: YAY PACO BARBECUE!!!!! *throws barbies on paco*
2014-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: *after a moment throws a hooker too* Now let the arson begin!
2014-10-15 [Sheamus Finn]: *still shooting* One Paco, Two Paco, Three Paco dead on the Floor.....
2014-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: five taco six taco more more more!!
2014-10-15 [Imperator]: *has bullet lodged in vital artery but can still shout* What are the best tongue twisters you know?! Paco! What's your answer?!
2014-10-15 [CuteCommander]: *continues to munch on own arm*
2014-10-15 [Avaz]: *Paco holds up a gigantic needle-nosed plier* This one.
2014-10-15 [Sideways]: That's not how Paco talks, you wank!
He says "Theez wan."


**
(Today the part of "Paco the Janitor" will be played by 1973 Cheech Marin while high on PCP)
2014-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I love Corn! *jumps on Paco's head and rides him around the room using my spurs to make him gallop* WHEEE!
2014-10-15 [Sideways]: Thommy Chong comes in for the express purpose of calling [Nuktae-tal] a "pendecker," then disappears in a cloud of pot smoke.
2014-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm two stories! * noms shoes*
2014-10-17 [Nuktae-tal]: comment everyday!!
2014-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Except the 14th, apparently.
2014-10-17 [Avaz]: Nobody liked the 14th anyway.
2014-10-17 [Kalma]: Can somebody explain to me what these Pacos are and if they're any good for devouring? Or will they be the source of the zombiebolapocalypse?
2014-10-18 [Sideways]: Nobody asked you, Donnie. I'm John Goodman.
2014-10-18 [Imperator]: John Goodman's wife is named Jennifer Badchick.
2014-10-18 [Doormat]: Hey, do you kids know of a place called Bob's Dinner? Some penguin shittur was spamming letters to my house about it. 
2014-10-18 [Imperator]: Bob's dinner is on the table over there. -->
2014-10-18 [Sheamus Finn]: Penguin? Nope, maybe around back or in the basement. Paco can show you the way... *Shoots another Paco* But not that one, he looked shifty...
2014-10-19 [Imperator]: The basement is flooded though... It's been raining for the last 7 weeks... There's also a newly formed river cutting the parking lot in half...
2014-10-20 [Nuktae-tal]: *skinny dips in wolves clothing* I'm a shark!
2014-10-20 [CuteCommander]: They won't fall for that...
2014-10-20 [Avaz]: They might fly for it, though!
2014-10-20 [Nuktae-tal]: *bites Avaz* Fly for this!
2014-10-20 [Sideways]: Previously, on Shark Week:


*[Sideways] arrives in a ratty, peculiar Adam West Batman costume, begins spraying [Nuktae-tal] with some sort of hose*
No worries, Robin! I have Shark Repellent!
*[Nuktae-tal] bursts into flames*


Whoops! This is Bat-Napalm.... :/
2014-10-20 [Sheamus Finn]: *singing* "This aint no place for no hero" *Shoots [Sideways]*
2014-10-20 [Sideways]: *clutches chest* ugh... Err what fucking song is that? X_x
2014-10-20 [Sheamus Finn]: Short Change Hero by The Heavy
2014-10-21 [Sideways]: Dammit, killed by a fucking hipster... X_x
2014-10-21 [Nuktae-tal]: HIPSTER!!!!!!!!!* melts from bat napalm slowly turning into a bat chick.* Squeek!
2014-10-21 [CuteCommander]: *eats a crunchy chick and grows horns* Somebody think of the children!
2014-10-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *+2 evil!* Oh gawd you actually ate it! Beak and all!
2014-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *sits quietly behind the register, thinking of the children*


*inconspicuously attempts to conceal his large erection*
2014-10-23 [ally]: The manager owes me 5€ for linking to this place.
2014-10-23 [Sheamus Finn]: Manager's office is in the basement, mind the steps and the water and zombies....
2014-10-23 [ally]: As long as I'm getting my moneys...
2014-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll get your money when I get my hostages back!


Those are MY hostages! And I was demanding only 4€ for them, this is a total rip off!
2014-10-23 [twitchboy]: Holy shit bobs still exists? how the hell has the health inspector not shut this down thanks to paco sleeping in the chili?
2014-10-23 [Sunrose]: Hiii!
2014-10-23 [Sheamus Finn]: *reloads gun* That's where he's sleeping? I'll be right back.....
2014-10-23 [Teufelsweib]: pppppppppppppppppppp
2014-10-23 [ally]: I freed the hostages. I told them to go back to you. If they didn't, that's not my fault.
2014-10-23 [CuteCommander]: I found one of the hostages walking continuously into a wall. When I tried to talk to him he said "Come on, let's get the hell out of here" in a voice like a Chicago transvestite.
2014-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: Boston, actually.


Now come on, let's get the hell out of here.
2014-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: 
2014-10-23 [ally]: xD
2014-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: As my first act as the new manager of Bob's Diner, I declare a war on prices! Come on down to Bob's Diner today and try our new two-twos-for-one-one deal! That's TWO two's for the price of a single one! However, the price of a single one has now multiplied by two, so two two's actually cost the same as one two cost or at least would have, but since one two is two ones and one two costs twice as much as one one, two two's now cost as much as two two's and two more two's too. Essentially, I hate you all. Don't touch my two's.
2014-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: But I want two two's too! One two and two ones isn't the same! Though, technically, it's exactly the same, it just isn't the same!
2014-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: And one and one and one is three!
2014-10-23 [twitchboy]: what happened to sag turkey?
2014-10-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: I heard he got stabbed.
2014-10-24 [Teufelsweib]: Saggin'
2014-10-24 [Paul Doyle]: Bob's Whiner!
2014-10-27 [Nuktae-tal]: Don't forget the zombie cow!!
2014-10-27 [Sheamus Finn]: TAINTED MEAT!!!!!! *reloads gun, shoots cow and 3 USDA inspectors*
2014-10-27 [Avaz]: dat scatter spread
2014-10-27 [CuteCommander]: Burn it with acid!
2014-10-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: !!
2014-10-27 [Nuktae-tal]: *cooks meth instead* I got it, it's coming! Hold your zombie cow brains!
2014-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *waits in line, impatiently holding his cow brains, which are leaking all over his nice suit*
2014-10-28 [Nuktae-tal]: THAT'S NOT A ZOMBIE COW BRAIN!!! *throws meth*
2014-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: RRRAAAAAAAAHH!!! *violently rips off his fancy suit in a fit of rage, revealing an even fancier suit underneath*


*picks up a zombie cow brain and calmly goes to the back of the line*
2014-10-29 [Imperator]: Excuse me, sir, I haven't seen you eating any Ramen lately, would you like a bowl?
2014-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from a large bowl of ramen*


Nah, I've never really liked the stuff.


*goes back to eating his large bowl of ramen, occasionally crunching into the bowl*
2014-10-29 [Teufelsweib]: nice banner you got there
2014-10-30 [Nuktae-tal]: *pours alkaline battery soup for the homeless*
2014-10-30 [CuteCommander]: Gimme some of that soup! I'm Homoless!
2014-10-30 [Nuktae-tal]: *gives CC Poison soup* eat up while it's frozen! *combs a banana for spices*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Poison soup? At B's D, that's redundant. And we don't take too kindly to redundancy. Tell 'em, Mort!
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't take too kindly to redundancy. *eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's right. We sure don't take too kindly to redundancy!
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Nope. Nohohoooo, we do NOT take too kindly to redundancy!


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: That's right! The kindliness we take toward redundancy is don't!
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*


Seriously though. We're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice.
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: What?
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice.


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh, I thought you said, "we are fond of redundancy here" and I was like, "Uh, no? We're not fond of redundancy here!" but it had turned out you said that we're NOT fond of redundancy here, which is correct and follows our policy of not being fond of redundancy here.
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: "Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant.
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: """Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy.
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: Thank you for your comment stating, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*"


The thing I'll only say once is that I hate redundancy. I can't help it. I hate redundancy! It's just so annoying. Don't make me say it twice.
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: You are very welcome for this comment, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*," and I thank you for your most recent comment with my comment and comment on that comment about my comment on your comment, which, in case you forgot, was this comment, "Thank you for your comment stating, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*"


The thing I'll only say once is that I hate redundancy. I can't help it. I hate redundancy! It's just so annoying. Don't make me say it twice."


But anyway, what was it you won't say twice?


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: The answer to your question in this comment, "You are very welcome for this comment, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*," and I thank you for your most recent comment with my comment and comment on that comment about my comment on your comment, which, in case you forgot, was this comment, "Thank you for your comment stating, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*"


The thing I'll only say once is that I hate redundancy. I can't help it. I hate redundancy! It's just so annoying. Don't make me say it twice."


But anyway, what was it you won't say twice?


*eats ramen*" is that I won't say that I hate redundancy twice. Nope, I'll only say it once. That's how much I hate redundancy.
2014-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh. Well, I'm glad we got that cleared up.


*eats ramen*
2014-10-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: This conversation, "16:26:06 (4h ago) [Nuktae-tal]: *gives CC Poison soup* eat up while it's frozen! *combs a banana for spices*




Delete
20:29:58 (50min ago) [53406]: Poison soup? At B's D, that's redundant. And we don't take too kindly to redundancy. Tell 'em, Mort!


Edit
Delete
20:30:24 (49min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: We don't take too kindly to redundancy. *eats ramen*




Delete
20:31:06 (49min ago) [53406]: That's right. We sure don't take too kindly to redundancy!


Edit
Delete
20:31:55 (48min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: Nope. Nohohoooo, we do NOT take too kindly to redundancy!


*eats ramen*




Delete
20:34:04 (46min ago) [53406]: That's right! The kindliness we take toward redundancy is don't!


Edit
Delete
20:38:03 (42min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen*


Seriously though. We're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice.




Delete
20:38:38 (41min ago) [53406]: What?


Edit
Delete
20:39:13 (40min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice.


*eats ramen*




Delete
20:42:05 (38min ago) [53406]: Oh, I thought you said, "we are fond of redundancy here" and I was like, "Uh, no? We're not fond of redundancy here!" but it had turned out you said that we're NOT fond of redundancy here, which is correct and follows our policy of not being fond of redundancy here.


Edit
Delete
20:44:30 (35min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!


*eats ramen*




Delete
20:49:54 (30min ago) [53406]: "Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant.


Edit
Delete
20:53:49 (26min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: ""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*




Delete
21:00:58 (19min ago) [53406]: """Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy.


Edit
Delete
21:04:33 (15min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*




Delete
21:06:38 (13min ago) [53406]: Thank you for your comment stating, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*"


The thing I'll only say once is that I hate redundancy. I can't help it. I hate redundancy! It's just so annoying. Don't make me say it twice.


Edit
Delete
21:13:01 (7min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: You are very welcome for this comment, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*," and I thank you for your most recent comment with my comment and comment on that comment about my comment on your comment, which, in case you forgot, was this comment, "Thank you for your comment stating, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*"


The thing I'll only say once is that I hate redundancy. I can't help it. I hate redundancy! It's just so annoying. Don't make me say it twice."


But anyway, what was it you won't say twice?


*eats ramen*




Delete
21:16:47 (3min ago) [53406]: The answer to your question in this comment, "You are very welcome for this comment, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*," and I thank you for your most recent comment with my comment and comment on that comment about my comment on your comment, which, in case you forgot, was this comment, "Thank you for your comment stating, "I have a question about this comment:


""""Of course I didn't say I was fond of redundancy here! You know I'm not fond of redundancy here! That's why I had said "I said we're not fond of redundancy here. Don't make me say it twice." It would be ridiculous had I said I was fond of redundancy here, when I am so very not fund of redundancy here!"


I like the way you said this. Very lacking in redundancy, which is good, because we don't care too much for redundancy here. That's why I like the way you said this. It wasn't redundant."


Thank you for the comment about my comment that you commented on. I agree that it isn't redundant and that it is good because we don't care too much for redundancy here. And your comment about my comment on the comment with my comment you commented on is exceptionally lacking in redundancy as well, probably because you don't much care for redundancy and nor do I care too much for redundancy, making me enjoy the lack of redundancy.


*eats ramen*"


You are welcome for my comment about your comment that I commented on and thank you for posting a comment about my comment about your comment with a comment about said comment on the comment and leaving a friendly comment at the end of the comment! But this is true, I do not much care for redundancy as you shouldn't well know, because I'll only say it once. That's just how much I hate redundancy. And it's good that you too hate redundancy."


Only say what once?


*eats ramen*"


The thing I'll only say once is that I hate redundancy. I can't help it. I hate redundancy! It's just so annoying. Don't make me say it twice."


But anyway, what was it you won't say twice?


*eats ramen*" is that I won't say that I hate redundancy twice. Nope, I'll only say it once. That's how much I hate redundancy.


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Delete
21:18:06 (2min ago) [Mortified Penguin]: Oh. Well, I'm glad we got that cleared up.


*eats ramen*" added a good number of comments to Bob's Diner!
2014-10-30 [Nuktae-tal]: SOUP SHOWER!! * pours soup through sprinkler and turns on* WHEE! * runs around naked getting fur all wet*
2014-10-30 [Sheamus Finn]: Okay, we know the stance on redundancy what about Irony?
2014-10-31 [Nuktae-tal]: BLASPHEMY!
2014-10-31 [CuteCommander]: *eats poisoned soup from a billion comments ago* It's gone cold! I demand you take it back! *dies* x___x
2014-11-02 [Nuktae-tal]: *cuts open stomach and reheats it* THERE NOW EAT IT! *pours down corpses mouth of CC*
2014-11-03 [CuteCommander]: X______X .........yum
2014-11-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *cuts open your stomach and reheats it again*


NOW EAT IT AGAIN.
2014-11-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: But so help me GOD, if you do so redundantly... *cracks knuckles*


Owies. *duct tapes his shattered knuckles back together*
2014-11-03 [Nuktae-tal]: *rips off tape and feed sit also to CC* EAT!!!!! You came to this Diner now we will stuff your corpse!!
2014-11-04 [CuteCommander]: X_____X         These portion sizes are incredible.....
2014-11-04 [Paul Doyle]: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZcJjMnHoIBI
2014-11-05 [Nuktae-tal]: NOW TIP WELL!! *throws smoke bomb into CC's mouth and stays there poking the corpse with a stick.*
2014-11-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: We're going to have to charge you extra for that smoke bomb.
2014-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Not to mention stick cleaning fees.
2014-11-08 [Nuktae-tal]: yeah CC!
2014-11-09 [CuteCommander]: X__________X  ........... Bite me, lifeys
2014-11-09 [Sheamus Finn]: Reverse Zombieism? *Pulls gun and starts shooting customers* Back, get back the Zombie CC is not made of chocolate!!
2014-11-09 [CuteCommander]: X________X ........ I am disappoint
2014-11-09 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks CC* I will still eat you CC don't worry!
2014-11-09 [CuteCommander]: *corpse CC unsuccessfully tries to block the mental image* X_______X        ....... I am now suffering from rigor mortis
2014-11-10 [Kalma]: *gets shot* oh beelzebub, I've been hit! *stumbles around bleeding on things*
2014-11-11 [Nuktae-tal]: Hey! We didn't call for an interior decorator! *shoots Kalma again* so it's free right?!
2014-11-12 [Kalma]: All blood free, guts cost extra *squirts blood on Nuktae-tal* I am also a personal stylist!
2014-11-12 [Nuktae-tal]: I love it!
2014-11-13 [CuteCommander]: X____________X  ..... A spare set of internal organs would be good
2014-11-13 [Avaz]: Where would you keep them?
2014-11-13 [Nuktae-tal]: We'll put them in PAco!
2014-11-13 [Sheamus Finn]: *Zombie Paco looks up* Not You Again! *shoots Zombie Paco* Nuk why keep bringing them up?
2014-11-14 [Nuktae-tal]: because they are luggage you can put anything in them you want!
2014-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Alternatively, why not just use Paco's organs instead of double stuffing him? He's not a goddamn Oreo... I think.


*takes a huge bite out of Paco's face as he screams in horror and falls to the ground, bleeding profusely*


Hmm...


*takes a huge bite out of an Oreo's face as it screams in horror and falls to the ground, bleeding profusely*


Interesting...


*grabs Paco again and dunks his face down in a glass of milk before taking a large enough bite to quiet the screaming*
2014-11-14 [CuteCommander]: X______X   .....don't let that happen to me
2014-11-15 [Kalma]: *uses the discarded Oreo to compress bullet wounds and staunch blood flow* I wonder if this tastes better than oreos and milk... How does that dunked Paco suit your fancy, Penguin?
2014-11-16 [Nuktae-tal]: Kay CC I will bring you back to life now *hits with lightning from a jar laughing maniacly* 
2014-11-19 [dead~spirit]: *runs in* "quick someone give me a drink!!!"
2014-11-19 [CuteCommander]: *revived by lightning, sits up and vomits poisoned blood into a glass* Drink this!
2014-11-19 [Nuktae-tal]: Hurray new menu item!!
2014-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Paco doesn't suit my fancy, he fancies my suit.


*smacks Paco's latest corpse around*


GO BEDAZZLE UP MY SUIT!


*he simply lays there, lazy and dead*
2014-11-23 [Nuktae-tal]: I will do it! *gets out bedazzler machine and goes to town*
2014-11-25 [Goma]: I hate to be "That guy" but does anyone here at Bob's like anime? I'm on the last half of a kickstarter with a friend and we could use some support we are VERY close to our goal.


If this bothers anybody I'll remove it https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/501906996/i-hope-senpai-notices-me-a-snarky-anime-podcast
2014-11-25 [CuteCommander]: Can I donate blood towards the cause?
2014-11-25 [Goma]: I'm not sure how much it would help :P
2014-11-25 [Nuktae-tal]: *cuts off CC's arm* I donate CC's hand everyone needs an extra hand!
2014-11-25 [Goma]: its true so very true, I hate shameless plugs but I don't have too much longer to make the funds and I'm also going to use the equipment we are buying to kick off my voice acting career
2014-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: While we at Bob's Diner typically frown upon shameless spamming like that, this seems like a noble cause, so I'll let it slide this time.


But speaking of, Bob's Diner is having a sale on Shameless Spam! It was Shameful Spam, but the Shame expired, so we had to throw it out.


And by that I mean we put it in the soup.
2014-11-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Are we hawaiian's? eating spam soup?! Where are the pineapples?! The humanity!!!!
2014-11-25 [Goma]: Normally I frown upon it too to be honest haha..I'm just running out of options, most of my close friends have already donated.
2014-11-25 [Goma]: I love pineapples <3
2014-11-26 [CuteCommander]: I love my hands. Well, hand. Now I only have one -_-
2014-11-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: Gobble mother fucking damn gobble, assholes.
2014-11-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Now it's the day after....
2014-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Now it's the next month....
2014-12-08 [dead~spirit]: no it's naught..
2014-12-09 [Avaz]: It's also not.
2014-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Is knot!
2014-12-09 [Nuktae-tal]: it's hot! I got a furnace to roast the babies! *pulls in dragon*
2014-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: The hostage 'i' has now been retrieved from [Nioniel] after several years and has been placed back on the wiki. We have not missed it. It is not welcome back. Nobody loved that 'i' in the first place.
2014-12-10 [Nuktae-tal]: I did
2014-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: SHUT UP, NO YOU DIDN'T! NOBODY loved that 'i'! Nobody...


*holds back a tear as he stares longingly at a 12ft.x12ft. wallet photo of the 'i' and himself holding hands (at Bob's Family Severed Hand and Pony Ride Museum)*
2014-12-10 [CuteCommander]: I never even noticed it was gone. That's some poor observation on I's part.
2014-12-11 [Nuktae-tal]: I had a statue made of that I in remembrance! *wheels out a different stolen I that had been bronzed alive.*
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Liar! That's a damn 'j' with the bottom half broken off!
2014-12-11 [dead~spirit]: im here for the no sale day..
2014-12-11 [Kalma]: I'm not here for the sale day
2014-12-11 [Teufelsweib]: I'm saleing the no day
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sailing a boat today.
2014-12-11 [Avaz]: I'm on a horse.
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a pony. And I don't recall you purchasing a ticket for Bob's Family Severed Hand and Pony Ride Museum.
2014-12-11 [Avaz]: Look at your keyboard. Now back to me. Now back to your keyboard. Now back to me. I'm on a pony.
2014-12-11 [CuteCommander]: I'm getting acid flashbacks. *melts*
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: I... I'm going to have to ask you to leave the museum, sir. Sorry, but I can't allow admittance without a ticket.


*quick draws his blaster and shoots an old lady wandering into the museum without a ticket*


*at least, she probably didn't have a ticket*


*I guess I didn't really check*


*shrugs and donates her hands to the museum*
2014-12-11 [Avaz]: Oooh, the old lady hands exhibit. My favorite!
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Ah yes, these are new to the museum. You have fine taste, sir! These hands were donated by a rich, handsome businessman earlier today. And if you count the rings, you can tell how many husbands she had! One. It was one. And he won't shut up about it.
2014-12-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes bursting into the museum with a large box and no ticket*


Yo, I got a delivery here. I'm gonna need you to sign this.


*hands over a standard nondisclosure/package acceptance/soul relinquishment waiver*
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: The fuck is this shit?! I didn't order no goddamn box, I ordered more hands and ponies! *grabs the box and hurls it violently into the furnace as it neighs loudly and explodes*
2014-12-11 [Sheamus Finn]: Wait the box 'neighs loudly and explodes' or does the furnace 'neighs loudly and explodes'?
2014-12-11 [Anvikit]: Hello, what's good to eat here?
2014-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: How should I know? Go check the food pile, I think I saw a bit of leg in there the other month that wasn't completely gangrenous. Though, I could be wrong. It may have been an arm. Regardless, it looked pretty succulent.


*goes back to reading his paper behind the register and ignoring the neighing and exploding furnace (that's just acting out to get attention again)*
2014-12-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws spare hand into the furnace* you greedy bastard I was saving that for a special occasion but no you have to go and beg for it didn't you?! *kicks furnace and ignores now flaming foot.*
2014-12-15 [CuteCommander]: *proceeds to ignore all flaming feet, those of the past, those now, and of the future*
2014-12-15 [Nuktae-tal]: more people need to post here! It's so cold!
2014-12-15 [Mortified Penguin]: It is pretty chilly. Someone close that door. *points at the giant hole in the wall*


*his foot, flaming in the future, continues to will have burn*
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: If I get one more stupid invitation for something to do with this page I'm gonna flip. It's borderline harassment.


Leave. me. alone.
2014-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sorry, but that's not the correct cancellation phrase for our weekly mailing list. In fact, it's actually the phrase to use when you want to sign up for our bi-weekly mailing list, which sends out the same things as our weekly mailing list, but twice.
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: Omg Mort, just fucking stop it!


I wish to unsubscribe to Bob's Weekly Mailing List, even though I'll miss out on all sorts of amazing deals! Just kidding, don't opt me out, I wish to receive even more updates, because I just can't get enough of Bob's Diner's new Food Pile Buffet! Now starting at only $4.7 million! WARNING: Bob's Diner's new Food Pile Buffet may not be food, but rather a stack of corpses and silverware that we wanted to get rid of. It's still probably worth the price though.


FUCK
2014-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: You have now been unsubscribed to Bob's Weekly Mailing List and instead been signed up for Bob's Tri-Weekly Mailing List! It's basically the same thing as our weekly mailing list, but it sends the same thing five times a week. The "tri-weekly" part is just a lie.
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: I hate you.
2014-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Whoa! Uncalled for! I'm tempted to unsubscribe you from all our various mailing lists for that!


But don't worry, I won't. I'm not that cruel.
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: *head desk*


Just do it and leave me the hell alone. I swear I get spam from this shit once a week. I've been ignoring it for forever but it's pissing me off.
2014-12-17 [Avaz]:
Not sure if seriously pissed off

Or just reached inception-level B's D circlejerk status.
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: I don't fucking care what it is, I want this page to leave me alone.
2014-12-17 [Avaz]: Just... Oh, I dunno, stop watching the page? Just a thought. >_>
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: I'm not watching the page. Or at least I wasn't till I commented. I'm sick of the invites I get from members. Just delete me from all the mailing lists or whatever. It's irritating as hell.
2014-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't listen to Avaz, stopping watching the page will auto-sign you up for Bob's Quad-Weekly Mailing List. It's like our normal mailing list, but with bonus death threats!
2014-12-17 [Ravenclaw]: I hate you so much, Mort.
2014-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Please address all complaints to [Sunrose] in the form of aggressive sexual advances.
2014-12-18 [kiradraco]: "I wish to unsubscribe to Bob's Weekly Mailing List.
2014-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm sorry, but that is an improper cancellation phrase. You have now been spitefully added to our 24/7 spam service: Servicing your spam 24/7!
2014-12-18 [Sideways]: http://youtu.be/bZio278IKGI [Ravenclaw]'s hidden camera footage from Bob's Diner undercover mission.
2014-12-18 [CuteCommander]: If I don't receive B's D updates in the form of suppository newsletters I will be a sad panda
2014-12-18 [Nuktae-tal]: eeeehhhh I like the spam in person in the form of a singing telegraph and acrobatics show please and thank you!
2014-12-18 [Evilmonk]: "I wish to unsubscribe to Bob's Weekly Mailing List, even though I'll miss out on all sorts of amazing deals! Just kidding, don't opt me out, I wish to receive even more updates, because I just can't get enough of Bob's Diner's new Food Pile Buffet! Now starting at only $4.7 million! WARNING: Bob's Diner's new Food Pile Buffet may not be food, but rather a stack of corpses and silverware that we wanted to get rid of. It's still probably worth the price though."
2014-12-19 [Sideways]: Silverware? This ain't the Ritz-Carlton you classist fucker!
2014-12-19 [Avaz]: Clueless fools. There is no escaping Bob's Diner!
2014-12-19 [Sideways]: No escaping? This ain't the Hotel California you fascist fucker!
2014-12-19 [Avaz]: Heil.


Oh wait, wrong ideology.
2014-12-19 [Sideways]: Yeah. Not Nazi-ism, PC-ism!


Wait, I know you go on about the master-race, but I just know a pompous faggot like you is a Mac |-(
2014-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Okay, okay. I'll give you guys a deal. First one to post 100 comments will be allowed to escape the mailing list. Those who fail will be spammed 20x as much.
2014-12-19 [Avaz]: Sideways, I can understand how much your troll panties must bunch up whenever you see a chance to mindlessly attack me unprovoked. But I am kindly asking you to remain civil. Please and thank you.
2014-12-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: I always wear troll briefs.


*a flock of seagulls mindlessly attack [Avaz] unprovoked, which wouldn't have happened had Paco not MINDLESSLY LEFT THE BREAD COOLING IN THE WINDOWSILL*
2014-12-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *just kidding, the is no windowsill*


*only the hole*
2014-12-20 [CuteCommander]: I hate it when seagulls fly out my gaping butt
2014-12-20 [Sideways]: [Avaz] is asking me not to troll...


At Bob's Diner....
Riiiiiight....
Derpity derp.
2014-12-21 [Nuktae-tal]: DERP!
2014-12-21 [Sheamus Finn]: Derp DUper Derpper...
2014-12-22 [Kalma]: Derpter Perpder soda derp
2014-12-22 [Nuktae-tal]: SLerp!
2014-12-23 [Sideways]: Due to recent threats of punishment from the guards, my lawyer has directed me to not direct anymore comments to a certain citizen, who's name rhymes with "gay spaz." Obviously, this citizen can't take a joke, and doesn't think he/she can be made fun of for spamming other people's wikis, or


DERP,


Get insulted @ B's D.


Also, since the guard who threatened me, who's name rhymes with "poodle noodle" is obviously not objective and clearly biased towards "neigh brazz," I have been advised by my lawyer to not discuss this issue beyond this intial statement.
That is all.


*takes down cardboard box that was set up as a podium atop the corpses of Paco zombies, and puts back the moldy pasta spoon that served as the microphone for the adress*
2014-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner does not recognize the authority of any guards and all threats made in regards to B's D should be ignored completely. We only recognize the authority of [Hedda]. And Bob. But fuck if I know who that asshole is.
2014-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: However, outside of B's D and its subsidiary wikis, the guards authority should probably be recognized. Unless you're me; I have diplomatic immunity.
2014-12-23 [Sideways]: No comment.
*starts drawing a protest sign with rancid spaghetti sauce in perpetration to march outside the council buildings.*


Hashtag GuardGate!!!
2014-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Please refrain from wasting our sauce, we have hungry customers. *points at all the empty tables*
2014-12-24 [Sideways]: Those are only empty if you don't count the rats.


*the rats are angrily murmuring about the slow service and how dry the dinner rolls are*
2014-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: You think my dinner rolls are dry?! DRY?!!


*grabs one of the rats by his tiny collar and starts shaking him*


I APOLOGIZE, SIR. LET ME MAKE YOU A FRESH BATCH.


*goes to the kitchen to make a fresh batch*
2014-12-25 [CuteCommander]: *sits in a booth full of rats* At least it's not a bath full of cats
2014-12-25 [Mortified Penguin]: *sits in a bath full of cats*


At least it's not a broth full of bats.
2014-12-26 [Nuktae-tal]: *bathes in broth full of bats* aaahhh feels as great as a tub full of nappies.
2014-12-26 [ally]: I did not have sexual relations with that man!
I also don't have a lawyer. :(
2014-12-27 [Sideways]: Hey! No Clinton references until you at least apply for an internship at my presidential office in Sidewaysistan.


Just send nudes. You'll probably get the position. I'm not picky.
2014-12-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Which position though? I'd prefer doggy.
2014-12-27 [Sheamus Finn]: Doggy, you mean you beg and your partner rolls over and plays dead?!
2014-12-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Plays...?
2014-12-28 [Sheamus Finn]: Well, if the partner was REALLY dead....we get into something totally different....
2014-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Better, you mean.
2014-12-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Well, at least no one complains....
2014-12-30 [CuteCommander]: My wife complains every time I fuck her dead father
2015-01-01 [Mortified Penguin]: First comment of 2015/third to last comment of 2015!
2015-01-02 [CuteCommander]: I have needed to poo ever since 2012
2015-01-02 [Sideways]: Stop shoving stuff up there and you won't get blockages!
2015-01-03 [CuteCommander]: But without buttplugs in my butt, how will I butter up the button buyers?
2015-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: I use the butter knife usually.


*angrily takes a customer hostage with the butter knife*


BUY SOME FUCKING BUTTONS!
2015-01-04 [Avaz]: *buys buttons with depictions of sex on them.*
2015-01-04 [Sideways]: But not butt-sex? Or was button sex the proper pun there? Pretty sure you need a shirt and thread for button sex
2015-01-04 [CuteCommander]: My butt is the shirt, the penis/finger/hand/head/tree is the thread
2015-01-04 [Sideways]:   
2015-01-04 [Sideways]: You ow have to chage your userame. I have decided to baish the letter _ from existace!!


Also a redwood sequoia will rape you.
2015-01-04 [Sheamus Finn]: No means No Treebeard!!!
2015-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey ow, Treebeard has some ice wood.
2015-01-04 [Sideways]: Thaks for playig alog, Mort!
2015-01-06 [CuteCommander]: That's a nice looking tree *licks lips* I smuggled those n's in
2015-01-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *mails out severed zebra heads, with thirty $2 stamps stapled to them, to all the subsidiary Bob's Diners*
2015-01-16 [Kalma]: That Treebeard... he really knows how to STICK it to you!
2015-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: You broke Bob's Diner with your terrible joke.
2015-02-10 [Sunrose]: Considering no one pays for their food I imagine it's been broke for some time. .
2015-02-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Food? What do you think this is, some kind of restaurant?
2015-02-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *a number of customers look up from their meals and realize they're actually in a church*


*the bar was a pew some homeless people were doing shots and lines off of*


*the bathroom was actually a confessional*


*and that wasn't a glory hole, that was a Praying Hole™*


*Father Mort is not pleased*


*there's still a cash register though, this is a goddamn business, not a charity*
2015-02-18 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm back!
2015-02-19 [Paul Doyle]: Hasta la vista, baby.
2015-02-23 [Nuktae-tal]: I do not speak that language.... But I do like babies!
2015-02-26 [Avaz]: Char-broiled or in stir fry?
2015-02-27 [Nuktae-tal]: Raw.
2015-03-02 [Avaz]: That's hardcore.
2015-03-02 [Nuktae-tal]: I try really hard
2015-03-03 [Avaz]: All the way deep down to your core?
2015-03-03 [Nuktae-tal]: I always like it hard in my core.
2015-03-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I prefer soft corn.
2015-03-19 [CuteCommander]: *boner erupts through the table* Unngh! All this mention of corn cores makes me want to eat Quorn from Quorthon's cornhole! Btw, who let out this destructive erection?
2015-03-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I don't know, but it's coming out of your paycheck! *storms into his office as the large erection quickly recedes from the hole in the table and seemingly chases Mort into the other room*


*Mort slams the door angrily*


*the erection hadn't caught up yet*


*screams of pain and pleasure erupt from the managerial office*
2015-03-19 [Nuktae-tal]: So where did everyone go? It was really lively again for a minute? wasn't it?
2015-03-21 [Stephen]: Reading this page's comments is always amusing.


Although now the comments come in much slower. Talk more, guys!


(and no, don't use this as a reason to complain about Elftown. There's enough about that on the Council page!)
2015-03-21 [Nuktae-tal]: Aw man Elftown! Don't get me started!! It's green and fun and man! augh! Agony!
2015-03-22 [Stephen]: Green! <3
2015-03-25 [Nuktae-tal]: All the green! Like a putrid Zombie flick... or salad... yuck...
2015-03-25 [Nuktae-tal]: or cthulu
2015-03-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Or yoshi
2015-03-25 [Nuktae-tal]: So alone in here... and cold... oh the lonely humanity!
2015-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort looks up from his newspaper and sighs annoyedly*


I get the hint...


*leans over and turns the air conditioner from 45°F to 46°F*


But that's coming out of your paycheck! HEAT ISN'T FREE!


*notices a hole in wall where heat is rushing in from the hot summer air outside and quickly patches it up*


Wait... it's not summer...


"Yes it is."


Oh, alright then!


*returns to crossing out pictures of kids in the missing children section in his newspaper and cackling quietly to himself*
2015-03-26 [CuteCommander]: *pumps children out of his butt* Did anyone hear that disembodied voice or was it just him?
2015-03-26 [Nuktae-tal]: Oh he has lots of voices... I like the disembodies ones the most... *blush*
2015-03-26 [Mortified Penguin]: "Oh my."


"*puts on his robe and wizard hat*"
2015-03-26 [CuteCommander]: Someone is definitely fucking with me now. Paco! Stop humping my leg!
2015-03-27 [Sideways]: 






  




2015-04-08 [Nuktae-tal]: Hesoos!!!!
2015-04-13 [Miaye]: Huzzah!!!!
2015-04-19 [Nuktae-tal]: YYYEEEAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!
2015-05-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's Diner has now been bought out by some competitors.
2015-05-04 [Nuktae-tal]: NNNNOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
2015-05-14 [Doormat]: Wait, when did [Sunrose] get b&... OR DID SHE BAN HERSELF? :O
2015-05-15 [Mortified Penguin]: No, I banned her. She was getting too uppity.
2015-05-16 [Doormat]: Pfft you couldn't ban a dinner from a diner
2015-05-16 [Mortified Penguin]: This isn't a diner! We're now a corndog stand.
2015-05-18 [Doormat]: >corndog stand
>isn't even called bob's weiner
>mfw no face
2015-05-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Bob's weiner is across the street, but they only serve crabs.
2015-05-21 [Nuktae-tal]: Weeeelllll the way I see it... it's not the same.
2015-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: NO DUH, CRABS AND CORNDOGS ARE DIFFERENT THINGS.


*angrily bites into Horndog's Corndogs new Crabdog (now with 20% more dog!)*
2015-05-26 [Nuktae-tal]: I likes babies and roasted faces better.... this stuff will make me gain something I don't want to think about! *shudder*
2015-05-27 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: Im back online again. How is everyone?
2015-05-27 [Nuktae-tal]: Thank goodness!! have you seen the changes?! even Paco changed clothes!
2015-05-27 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: yeah I have very fancy now :)
2015-06-10 [Pillowthief]: Oh, holy crap, so this was what you were talking about. What happened to Bob's Diner?
2015-06-10 [CuteCommander]: I think it got minced up and put into the dildos
2015-06-10 [CuteCommander]: That wasn't a typo
2015-06-10 [CuteCommander]: I ate 12 dildos
2015-06-10 [CuteCommander]: The batteries were a little difficult
2015-06-11 [Nuktae-tal]: I would imagine... it was quite the shocking after taste!!!
2015-06-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Those weren't dildos, those were corndogs.


There were, however, batteries in them.


*goes back to eating a vibrating corndog*
2015-06-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks batteries....from a car* Whhheeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!
2015-06-13 [~~Butterfly Angel~~]: lol wow so shocking
2015-06-14 [Mortified Penguin]: THAT JOKE HAS ALREADY BEEN MADE.


*starts violently whipping Buttfly Anal with an extension cord*
2015-06-14 [CuteCommander]: Can I get an order with extra hot mustard? I want to pop it up my bum. And can I get another to go? In my urethra?
2015-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: What the hell do we look like, some kind of corndog stand?!
2015-06-15 [CuteCommander]: Did I say I wanted corndogs? Give me the Caesar salad!
2015-06-15 [Mortified Penguin]: What the hell do we look like, some kind of diner?!


*stabs a head of lettuce 23 times and drop kicks it into traffic*
2015-06-17 [Nuktae-tal]: *chases lettuce head* MY HEAD!!!!!
2015-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not a real head, you know. Don't be so dramatic.


*goes back to making a few more Caesar salads, carefully making sure to remove the eyes of lettuce, the ears of lettuce, and the nose of lettuce from the head of lettuce he's repeatedly stabbing 23 times*
2015-06-17 [Nuktae-tal]: *collects ears and eyes and noses and sticks them on self* I am now a super hero!!
2015-06-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *rabbits eat your face or something, I dunno*
2015-06-17 [Nuktae-tal]: First my head and now my face!!!!!! *runs screaming*
2015-06-17 [CuteCommander]: Gimme gimme gimme that tasty face!
2015-06-18 [Nuktae-tal]: *screams* FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
2015-06-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Eh, you didn't really need a face anyway. All they're good for is facing things.
2015-06-19 [Nuktae-tal]: Now I can never face anything!!! My parents.... my child!!! THE FUTURE!!!!
2015-06-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Eh, you didn't really need a future anyway.
2015-06-19 [CuteCommander]: Don't face anything, just bum it. Bum the future. Bum your parents. Bum your- no don't do that
2015-06-20 [Nuktae-tal]: *Burns* FFFFIIIIIRRRREEEE!!!!
2015-06-21 [Doormat]: I guess the gig is up. The Turkey is the hacker known as 4chan. #we'reoutboyz
2015-06-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: 4chan is the hacker known as Turkey. #i'minboyz
2015-06-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *#boyzareinme
2015-06-21 [Nuktae-tal]: eeewwww in.... I'm never in... just out... out of my mind... out of time... money...
2015-06-22 [Doormat]: Nice badge turkey #epicmaymays
2015-06-23 [Sideways]: *stumbles in with a bottle of honey Jack and a bag of Burger King whoppers, grumbles about Republicans*
2015-06-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *starts chewing on bottle of honey jack.*
2015-06-24 [CuteCommander]: *starts chewing on Jack's honey bottle*
*honey bottle is euphemism for penis*
Can I get a steak knife?
2015-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from smacking his honey bottle as some thick, sticky liquid oozes from the opening at the tip*


A euphemism for what now?
2015-06-24 [Sideways]: *eyes slowly pan around the room* the mushrooms must have kicked in, then... *shrugs and chugs whiskey.*
2015-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *squeezes his honey bottle too hard and sprays a group of children with his thick, sticky liquid*


*they start crying and complaining, like usual, but luckily a passing bear mauls the lot of them to death*


*licks his fingers and goes back to deep frying corndogs in the soup or whatever it is we do around here these days*
2015-06-24 [Nuktae-tal]: *starts licking the bowls*
2015-06-25 [CuteCommander]: *licks the balls*
*balls is a euphemism for penis*
I still need that steak knife....
2015-06-26 [Nuktae-tal]: *Hands CC a Dildo* This will help!
2015-06-26 [Mortified Penguin]: What does this look like, some kind of steak knife store?!


*angrily throws one of his many steak knives at CuteSalamander, but misses, hitting the Bob's Steak Knife Store sign, causing it to fall over onto a pile of recently delivered steak knives*
2015-06-27 [CuteCommander]: *uses the dildo to cut into a steak knife* I thought this was a corndoggery. Y'know a dogging location where people felate corn
2015-06-28 [Sideways]: *watches this, while a loop of Jefferson Airplane's "White Rabbit" blares loudly in his mind.* NO! You feed YOUR fuckin' head, Mort! *screams randomly*
2015-06-29 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws a pickle at everybodies face*
2015-07-06 [Nuktae-tal]: Hello?!
2015-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: I was aware you threw the pickle at my face, I just wasn't sure if it hit me or not yet. I've been waiting on you to confirm, so we can get back to Bob's Dinering.
2015-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *feeds his head a pickle*


*his head croons*
2015-07-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *hits Mort's Face* *with a hammer behind the pickled herring* Take that!
2015-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! You're scaring it!


*cradles his head in his arms as it sniffles and whimpers*
2015-07-09 [CuteCommander]: Have your head take two of these, then call me in the morning *hands Nuktae a jar of dicks*
2015-07-09 [Nuktae-tal]: *Dances holding jar* I've got a jar of Dicks! I've got a jar of dicks!
2015-07-12 [Sideways]: In my head there are Zombies! Zah-hom-bies! Zah-ohm-biyaas! Yaas! Yaaas!
2015-08-23 [Mortified Penguin]: SHUT UP, MISTY!
2015-08-24 [Nuktae-tal]: why won't anyone get on a post regularly?
2015-09-02 [Mortified Penguin]: [Stephen] broke Elftown.
2015-09-07 [shinta-dono]: Hey all what's up!
2015-09-07 [Sideways]: Your mom on webcam.
2015-09-07 [shinta-dono]: Well that escalated quickly.
2015-09-08 [Sideways]: His name is Paco. *turns up the speed on the escalator, causing Paco to rocket launch through the ceiling.* I just learned this diner is only one story tall...
2015-09-08 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm only one story tall *holds up a one story book*
2015-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks the book out of Nuktae-tal's hand and into the soup*


That's actually book one in a trilogy, there are several other stories in it. I highly suggest you finish it, it's a good read.


*goes back to reading book two in the trilogy, the one where Timmy hooks up with the Dark Lord's mom and gets her pregnant and becomes the Dark Lord's stepfather and they all have to fit in a tiny, one bedroom apartment and Timmy learns to love the Dark Lord as his own son and teaches him to throw a baseball, so he can win a trophy in the big Tee-ball game next Saturday*
2015-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, B's D turned 11 like a week ago and everyone missed the end of the friscal year.
2015-09-08 [Nuktae-tal]: No! I will find another *jumps into the soup to find a different one story book*
2015-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a reading light in there somewhere and an outlet by the third bookshelf from the left. Let me know when you're finished in the library/soup and don't forget we're having a Check-one-out-get-another-one-free-or-something Special. *shuts the lid and goes back to coloring in court papers with crayons behind the register*
2015-09-08 [Nuktae-tal]: *swims through the shelves before jumping out* Aha! Found one! One story! *holds up peice of paper with one story written on it. exactly the words one story.*
2015-09-10 [Sideways]: *Holds up a piece of paper that says "ten feet" on it* this is the one that's actually canon.
2015-09-18 [Drack is now ENIGMA]: *Crawls out from under a rock* Seems like the past six years haven't changed much on here.
2015-09-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Your unpaid tab, however, has. With the balloon loan you took out from Bob's Family Bank and Tractor Depot, including the interest fee on unpaid interest fees, you now owe us... $7. I hope that glass of free tap water was worth it, scumbag.


*the debt collecting rhinos burst in and start curb stomping ENIGMA, cut off his hands, and steal $2,760 from his wallet*


Now, if you don't mind, would you take this customer satisfaction survey? If you mark "highly satisfied" on the first sixty questions, I'll be entered into a contest to win a jet ski! *places an unsharpened pencil in one of the severed hands and goes back to sleeping in the register*
2015-09-19 [Sideways]: *sells the manuscript to Ten Feet: The Single Story Story for 7 cents, puts a 1% payment towards ENIGMA's diner tab*
2015-09-20 [Nuktae-tal]: Ahahahahaha* rides Rhino's*
2015-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *buys the rights and manuscript to Ten Feet: The Single Story Story and has it published by Bob's Publishing Company Or Something And Unrelated Comedic Side Business*


*it makes millions and warrants a sequel, Ten Feet: The Single Story Story 2: The Unwarranted Sequel, which is even more successful, prompting a third book in the series titled: Ten Feet: The Single Story Story 2: The Unwarranted Sequel 2: Part Three*
2015-09-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *TF:TSSS2:TUS2:PT ends up being adapted into a movie and spawns a series of stupidly named films that follow it before Mort gets bored of this joke and hurls it into the furnace*
2015-09-20 [Sagacious Turkey]: *walks in playing Ten Feet: The Single Story Story 2: The Unwarranted Sequel 2: Part Three 2: 2 The Movie: 2: The Sequel: The Video Game: Part 2: The Game on his handheld video gaming device*


*gets angry at the long title screen and throws his handheld video gaming device into traffic*


*whips out his tentacleheld video gaming device and resumes playing as he absent mindedly continues walking through the diner and out the back door and into traffic*
2015-09-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *eats popcorn backwards* I liked the book better.
2015-09-24 [Sideways]: It's a quick, but thrilling read, right?
*pats [Nuktae-tal] on the head* thanks for the compliment, Nuka-Cola, but if you'll excuse me one moment....
*raises head and yells*


MORT! I've come for my royalty check!
2015-09-27 [Nuktae-tal]: *purrs*
2015-09-29 [Mortified Penguin]: BOB'S DINER DOES NOT RECOGNIZE ROYALTY.
2015-09-29 [Sheamus Finn]: I know I didn't vote for them
2015-09-30 [Sideways]: Well than who the fuck is Bob?
2015-10-02 [Nuktae-tal]: I vote on everything! *pulls out voting stickers*
2015-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: According to Google, "bob1
/bäb/
verb
verb: bob; 3rd person present: bobs; past tense: bobbed; past participle: bobbed; gerund or present participle: bobbing


  1.
  (of a thing) make a quick short movement up and down.
  "I could see his red head bobbing around"
  synonyms:        move up and down, bounce, toss, skip, dance, jounce; More
  wobble, jiggle, joggle, jolt, jerk;
  nod, incline, dip;
  wag, waggle
  "the bottle bobbed in the water"
    cause (something) to make a quick short movement up and down.
    "she bobbed her head"
    make a sudden move in a particular direction so as to appear or disappear.
    "a lady bobbed up from beneath the counter"
    move up and down briefly in a curtsy.
    synonyms:        move up and down, bounce, toss, skip, dance, jounce; More
    wobble, jiggle, joggle, jolt, jerk;
    nod, incline, dip;
    wag, waggle
    "the bottle bobbed in the water"


noun
noun: bob; plural noun: bobs


  1.
  a movement up and down.
  "she could only manage a slight bob of her head"
  synonyms:        move up and down, bounce, toss, skip, dance, jounce; More"
2015-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I hope that answers your question.
2015-10-07 [Nuktae-tal]: BORED!!! *bites M.P.*
2015-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I wouldn't do that. I take rabies recreationally.


*goes back to foamin' and jerkin' behind the register*
2015-10-13 [Sideways]: *runs up to Mort with my new hoverboard* WOW! Michael J. Fox!
*thrusts hoverboard at Mort and a sharpie* Mr. Fox! Will you sign this for me? Gosh, I loved you in Spin City!
2015-10-17 [Nuktae-tal]: Colors!!!!!! * runs around waving arms in air like I just don't care*
2015-10-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Sure, anything for a fan!


*Mort scribbles an incomprehensible signature on the ironing board, not because he's making a Parkinson's joke, but because he's severely illiterate*


*goes back to reading his newspaper*
2015-10-19 [Nuktae-tal]: All the caring! * sobs in a corner under the ironing board*
2015-10-26 [Araglas]: *slams the front door opening running in waving a spatula around*


Quick! Which one of you recently kissed a zombie with one leg?!
2015-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks under his desk*


*the zombie currently fellating him has 1.2 legs*


Huh, wasn't me, I guess.
2015-10-27 [Araglas]: *eyes everyone*


Well don't kiss 'em again! They've got scabies and that's me secret ingredient fr the soup special!


*marches back into kitchen swearing about fish and chips*
2015-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *goes back to making out with zombies*
2015-11-04 [Nuktae-tal]: *laughs*
2015-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *chuckles*
2015-11-05 [Sideways]: *guffaws*
2015-11-06 [Araglas]: *chortles*
2015-11-07 [Sideways]: *Goatses*
2015-11-07 [Araglas]: *alonzees*
2015-11-08 [Sheamus Finn]: *Snickers*
2015-11-08 [Sideways]: *Shilleleighs*
2015-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *keks*
2015-11-08 [Araglas]: *lols*
2015-11-09 [Sheamus Finn]: *cachinnates*
2015-11-09 [Araglas]: I admit defeat, that is the best word. All hail the word!
2015-11-10 [Sideways]: *makes arbitrary post containing only twelve words so he can continue the tradition of numbers, heh*
2015-11-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *makes a capricious post containing only sixteen words and one comma so he can continue the tradition of numbers, ha*
2015-11-11 [Araglas]: *returns to the kitchen because words don't feed empty bellies, zombies do*
2015-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *some angry customers look up from their Word Salads™*


Shh.


*satisfied by this unsatisfying "shh", they return to eating their plates of shredded newspapers and subpoenas*
2015-12-08 [Sideways]: The subpoena's are all yellowed and creased, left over from the attack of the paperserving bot 5000 several years ago. Mort also seemed to have repaired the hole in the roof made in the attack with the bones of Paco clones and, for some reason, a canopy stiched together made of child sized clothing*
2015-12-11 [Alexi Ice]: Christmas Competition SPAM!


I have not been here in forever....>>
2015-12-11 [Nuktae-tal]: It's been forever!
2015-12-11 [Sideways]: Nobody wants you around here, Akane


-_______-
*super judgemental eyes*
2015-12-12 [Alexi Ice]: Don't hate me because you ain't me, baby.
2015-12-12 [Alexi Ice]: Shit yeah, I'm number 17 in the top commenters. The Slave Trade needs more bids. So yeah, spam and stuff.
2015-12-13 [Nuktae-tal]: hate me!
2015-12-14 [Sideways]: You are beneath my contempt, Nuktae :P
2015-12-14 [Alexi Ice]: I hate everyone.
2015-12-14 [Sideways]: Them's fightin' words.
2015-12-14 [Alexi Ice]: Come at me, bro
2015-12-14 [Sideways]: I'm not your bro, friend!
2015-12-14 [Alexi Ice]: You could be
2015-12-14 [Sideways]: *gasp!* I have been bro-zoned! You're such a bitch! I'm a nice guy! How come girls never like nice guys???????????????xinfinity
#Brony #Fedora #buttonupDBZshirt #neckbeard #waifupillow
2015-12-14 [Alexi Ice]: You literally just described my old friend from HS. I hooked him u with a girl that gave him herpes lol
2015-12-14 [Sideways]: You are a destroyer of lives.
2015-12-14 [Alexi Ice]: I try
2015-12-14 [Sideways]: Its a good thing I don't have any of those hashtag things. Just nobody tell Mort. He has all those things, only he'll probably ask you too hook him up with a guy with Hep C instead
2015-12-14 [Alexi Ice]: Right
2015-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah, I already got Hep C twice. I'm trying to find some gonorrhea right now.
2015-12-15 [Nuktae-tal]: mmmm Gonorrhea!
2016-01-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *quick draws his blaster and guns down a customer trying to walk through the door, having clearly ignored the CLOSED FOR 2016 sign outside*


We're closed for 2016, CAN'T YOU READ?!


*goes back to working hard behind the register as the man's seeing eye dog whimpers*


*the dog is promptly tossed into the soup*


*so is the man*


*Mort shrugs and dives into the soup as well*
2016-01-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *stirs soup* when the moon hits your eyes you get blind in a hurry!
2016-01-16 [shadowfire09]: So I hear someone is looking for some good old fashioned gonorrhea?
2016-01-20 [Nuktae-tal]: YOU ARE! *points fingers*
2016-01-24 [Sideways]: Gonocehpasiphaherpachamidatitis
2016-01-26 [Araglas]: I NEED MORE ZOMBIES! Or else I can't finish the mince pies I'm making for the party! DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY ZOMBIES THEY CAN SPARE?!
2016-01-26 [shadowfire09]: DON'T YOU POINT THAT FINGER AT ME *uses scissors to chop offending finger off* 
2016-01-29 [Nuktae-tal]: *starts chewing on cut off finger.* I have no more zombies! I am out plum and pudding out of zombies!
2016-01-29 [Duke Devlin]: So uhh... we're closed for 2016??
2016-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, I sprained my ankle pretty bad, *he indicates his kneecap* so I can't work the register anymore.


*goes back to playing Cashier: The Video game*


Wow, it's like I'm really working the register at a real diner!


*puts up a "closed" sign in the game and props his character's feet up on the register*
2016-02-01 [shadowfire09]: isn't Mort close enough to a zombie? Use him. He can't get away with that bum ankle.
2016-02-04 [Nuktae-tal]: TRUE! Let's just use mort. He's pretty uselss like a snake! *pokes mort with stick*
2016-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *hisses and strikes at the stick, before slithering away and curling up in the register*
2016-02-05 [Nuktae-tal]: AW SOOO CUTE! *puts miniature bunny ears on Mot's head.* *takes pictures*
2016-02-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *hisses and strikes at the pictures, before slithering away and curling up in the sub-register*
2016-02-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *puts more miniature hats on* SO CUTE! KAWAII!!!
2016-02-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts taking sub-orders*


The hell do you want?


"A sub."


We don't sell subs.


"But you just said-"


NO I DIDN'T, GET THE FUCK OUT!


*puts up a sub-"on break" sign and props his snake legs up on the sub-counter and starts eating a sub-sub that's so big he has to hold it with both of his snake hands*
2016-02-24 [Nuktae-tal]: *starts eating the other end of his sub while adding a few more hats* On om om nom. SNAKEY!
2016-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *punches Misty*
2016-03-31 [Sideways]: Omg misty is still a thing. Its been like 7 years
2016-04-01 [Sheamus Finn]: Misty is timeless.....
2016-04-02 [Sideways]: *punches the concept of time*
2016-04-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Omg time is still a thing. Its been like 8 years
2016-04-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *eats time too* Just a little don't wanna get fat!
2016-04-12 [Alexi Ice]: Ahem, excuse me but could I get one non-dairy, soy free, gluten free, non-fat, non- artificial human to drain the life out of, please?
2016-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Human? Nah, we ain't got no humans. There should still be a few Mexicans in the back though, if you're willing to settle.
2016-04-19 [Nuktae-tal]: Couple of Paco clones too! *licks tip of pencil for more reasons*
2016-04-22 [Sideways]: I got something you can drain, Miss Ice.
2016-04-28 [Alexi Ice]: Peasant.
2016-04-28 [Sideways]: BOURGEOISIE! *huff*
2016-05-04 [Nuktae-tal]: Maidens?
2016-05-04 [Alexi Ice]: Sexy maidens maybe
2016-05-06 [Nuktae-tal]: *poses sexily in gorilla suit* But I wife and whore not maiden...
2016-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: OH SHIT, I HAVEN'T BEEN TO WORK IN EIGHT MONTHS. BOB'S DINER NEEDS ME! *leaps into his car and rushes to work*


  



*comes bursting into the diner after carefully parking and grabs a toilet brush off the weapon rack*


I know, I know, I'm late... I'm getting to work...


*climbs into the soup and starts scrubbing himself with the brush*
2016-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: MY TOOTHBRUSH!
2016-05-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Eww, you use the toilet brush on your teeth? That's disgusting, I don't want to get plaque in the soup/toilet.


In related news, we're currently at an average of 0.4377510040160642570281124497992 comments per day, making this our worst friscal year ever. EXPLAIN YOURSELF, ALEXI!


*grabs her by the scruff of her boobs and starts shaking her violently*


WHAT DID YOU DO WITH OUR OTHER SIX THOUSAND COMMENTS FROM THIS YEAR?!
2016-05-06 [Mortified Penguin]: But seriously, where did those eight thousand comments go? I can't believe we lost ten thousand comments... we really need to figure our where those twenty thousand comments went. Without those fifty thousand comments, our friscal report is going to be really awful this year. Please let me know if any of you know what happened to those hundred thousand comments.
2016-05-07 [Nuktae-tal]: Don't look at me I piss on here all the time... When I can. You know when I'm not selling it.
2016-05-08 [Alexi Ice]: I murdered them violently, of course.
2016-05-17 [Nuktae-tal]: Alexi stop murdering the evil and currupt. We only do in the good ones these days!
2016-05-17 [shadowfire09]: THREE CHEERS FOR MURDERING THE INNOCENT!
2016-05-18 [Nuktae-tal]: Hip Hip! MURDEEEERRRRR!!!
2016-05-18 [Alexi Ice]: Virgin blood is the sweetest by far
2016-05-19 [Nuktae-tal]: Like cool air on a balls hot day!
2016-05-26 [Sideways]: These days, virgin blood is really expensive. You have to kill moba gamers and little kids for that shit
2016-05-27 [Nuktae-tal]: RAWR!!! GAWDZILLAR!@!!! *spits flames*
2016-05-29 [Alexi Ice]: And anyone who watches my little pony probably
2016-05-30 [Mortified Penguin]: What about those of us who like to have sex while watching MLP? Huh? Bet you didn't know badasses like me existed, did you?


*sighs*


I miss that goat...
2016-06-01 [Nuktae-tal]: *chews on horn*
2016-06-10 [Sideways]: I've eaten meaty spaghetti made out of goat
True story!
It wasn't Mort's goat though
Difficult to ascertain truth of story...
Just by hitting return at random intervals,
and creating haphazard stanzas
With no rhythm or meter at all
I create Bob's Diner's Daily Poem
2016-06-12 [Nuktae-tal]: I am no good at poems. I just like to eat. *devours horns*
2016-07-06 [Alexi Ice]: I'm here for the free cheese
2016-07-06 [Sad Lonely Angel]: It's been ages.for me...
2016-07-06 [Mortified Penguin]: BOTH OF YOU SHUT THE HELL UP AND GET BACK TO WORK!


*throws a rake at Sad Lonely Anal's head*


GO MOP THE GODDAMN KITCHEN!


*drop kicks a wheel of cheese at Alexi Ass*


GO MOP THE GODDAMN FRIDGE!


Also, we're out of cheese. Someone needs to milk the goat again.


Also, I'm docking everyone's pay until I figure out who keeps getting mud on my soup ladle.


Also, the soup-of-the-day is Dirt and Water Soup™ made from the finest dirt I could find.


Also, someone needs to put my Grave Digging Shovel™ back on the weapon rack.


*having accomplished his managerial duties for the month, Mort goes back to sleeping under his desk in the freezer*
2016-07-07 [Sad Lonely Angel]: So mean....
2016-07-07 [Mortified Penguin]: What did you just say to me?


*grabs Sod Longly Angle by the horns*


WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?!


*starts aggressively shaking Sad Lanky Angler*


Seriously, I have pine cones in my ears.


*removes pine cones*


Did you say something?


*resumes shaking*


DID YOU?!!


*shrugs and shoves the pine cones back in and goes back to napping*
2016-07-08 [Sad Lonely Angel]: And with that I bid you goodbye. Toodles. Seems this is not the place for me anymore.
2016-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: You're not off the clock yet! And you still haven't even mopped the kitchen! *points at the rake*


Don't think I won't just fire you and replace you! There's plenty other people here ready and willing to do your job!


*Paco, sitting completely alone in the diner, looks up from his medicinal burrito and scowls*


PLENTY!
2016-07-08 [Sad Lonely Angel]: Good bye.
2016-07-09 [Alexi Ice]: *Nibbles cheese while stiring dirt soup*
2016-07-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps the cheese out of Alexi's mouth*


How many times do I have to tell you we're out of cheese?!


*resumes eating a grilled cheese with extra cheese melted on top and bottom and bread made of cheese smothered in butter, which is also made of cheese*
2016-07-09 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-07-10 [Mortified Penguin]: GET BACK IN YOUR CAGE!


*harpoons [nokaredes]*
2016-07-14 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws pokeball at Handsome man.* I choose you!
2016-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Please stop throwing Pokeballs at me.
2016-07-17 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws in face* WANT!
2016-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: GET YOUR BALLS OUT OF MY FACE.
2016-07-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh, sorry.


*climbs down off of Mort's head and sits naked in the soup instead*
2016-07-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Much better. *resumes getting pelted in the face with Pokeballs, none of which work, because I'm still at max HP, I mean seriously, it's like you're not even trying, [Nuktae-tal]*


Mort uses Surf!
It's super effective!




Paco, get some paper towels and dry that water up, before someone slips on it.


*everyone in the diner has already drown*


*including Paco*


I SAID NO MORE BREAKS!


*Paco gets up and starts laying down individual sheets of Bounty™ paper towels on the surface of the lake that was once Bob's Diner*


*it's not very effective*
2016-07-25 [Nuktae-tal]: *fly's* HAHAHAHA can't fool me!
2016-07-28 [Mortified Penguin]: *fools you*
2016-07-29 [Sideways]: Did.... Did you guys not notice Misty appear
2016-07-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Misty?! Where?! Did she get out again?!


*quick draws a harpoon and hurls it at [nokaredes]*
2016-07-31 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-07-31 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2016-08-02 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: !!
2016-08-03 [Mortified Penguin]: ...wait. When the hell did Misty show up?!


*picks up [nokaredes] and breaks her in half over his knee*
2016-08-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2016-08-03 [Sideways]:   
2016-08-04 [~Crimson Angel~]: 
2016-08-04 [Nuktae-tal]: *runs screaming from magic moving pictures*
2016-08-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-08-04 [Nuktae-tal]: WEll Hello there handsome! *makes eyes at skeleton*
2016-08-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-08-04 [Nuktae-tal]: You like that didja? We'll I've got more sweet Cheeks! *raises eyebrows suggestively*
2016-08-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *violently rips Nutcake-tal's eyebrow off*


I WARNED YOU TO STOP DOING THAT.


Wait, did I? I coulda swore I warned somebody to stop using/having eyebrows at some point...


*shrugs and tosses it in the incinerator*
2016-08-05 [Nuktae-tal]: I brought spares! *pulls out stickers of kittens and puts on place eyebrows used to be* just like normal!
2016-08-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Liar, you used to have tractor stickers.
2016-08-12 [Nuktae-tal]: That was so last season. *smears manure on chin like beard*
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: We
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: have
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: nine
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: days
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: to
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: get
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: the
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: comment
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: count
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: up.
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: We only have 176 comments this friscal year?!
2016-08-22 [Mortified Penguin]: We need more than 218+ more comments, otherwise, this will be the worst friscal year on record.


*a little girl starts crying, but Mort consoles her by screaming about massive friscal policy overhauls next quarter and bashing her in the face with rolled up friscal statistical data graphs*
2016-08-23 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-08-25 [Nuktae-tal]: I care! About my kid and dogs.
And sex. lots and lots of caring for sex.
2016-08-25 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a caring person really...
2016-08-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Don't you all think so too? everyone? Hello?
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh... *eats ramen*...


Deliveries go around back.
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: ONE DAY LEFT!


*grabs Nuked-towel and harpoons Misty/Amoeba/Crimpin' Anal/whatever with her*
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: You have all failed me.
2016-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: ESPECIALLY YOU, [Sideways].
2016-09-02 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes bursting in through the air and dust and smoke and stuff or whatever*


*breaks Misty or something similarly violent*


WHY WOULD YOU PICK CLINTON OVER TRUMP?!
2016-09-03 [Nuktae-tal]: Why would you pick either?
2016-09-03 [Sheamus Finn]: Choice between a Douche and Turd Sandwich.....
2016-09-04 [~Crimson Angel~]:
[Sheamus Finn]...


  

2016-09-08 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-10 Lazlo52: I'd hate to interrupt your, um...intense intellectual debate, but it seems you have a visitor.
2016-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Deliveries go around back.
2016-09-15 Lazlo52: Haha, no, I was actually here to receive. By what seems to be pure chance, I found this gold mine of comedy and tragedy. Your hilarious interactions coupled with the tragic fate of the friscal year make for an invigorating novel! I plan on reading from the beginning...however, paranoia subsists. There was talk of a Word document backup and it would be very important to have in case the unspeakable happens. Whether it's complete or not, I must ask: is it available?


tl;dr Can this random stranger have that Word document you were working on at least 6 years ago?
2016-09-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Dunno where it's at, been meaning to make a new one.


But I'm sure [Hedda] would never let Elftown die! Just suffer.
2016-09-16 Lazlo52: That's all right, just my nerves talking. But, hopefully by now you've found a less tedious way to carry over those images, yeah? I've seen there's...quite a lot.
2016-09-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Uh huh, uh huh... *eats ramen*...


Where'd you come from?! How'd you find this place?! I've never been one to advertise this wiki... Which three-letter agency sent you?! CIA?! FBI?! NSA?! QVC?!!
2016-09-17 [~Crimson Angel~]: The DGF? (Don't Give a Fuck)
2016-09-17 Lazlo52: Oh dear, they asked. Well, I was Googling regular, normal images of sergals, but then one of the images was depicting vore. I clicked it and saw the page title was "Bob's Diner." .....Hold on, I'm just now catching that coincidence..... Anyway, that's really it. That Nekko Fox or whatever was sharing their smiles, which managed to lead me here. I'm sure you're all very upset, now.
2016-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: They make sergal pics without vore nowadays? Weird.


In any case, why don't you make an account here, so you can visit all my other wildly successful wikis, such as Maze of Guile, Chess Tournament, and Maze of Guile? There are also some other, less successful wikis, like Maze of Guile, but those are less important and less successful than wikis like MAZE OF GUILE. Here are some links you could use to sign up:


http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=dqDaQY6k
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=TmtBjyXv
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=FsmY7NSN
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=eV7vmpTp
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=WJiNMi2d
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=JawnMcsY
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=mQMamPkk
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=Cifd6Hre
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=vHVsLCvK
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=cfhd22QK
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=yhavDEHW
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=mZnszhEZ
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=9dRCeBky
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=nQZ6rHTz
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=FGCL9aJf



This site is almost dead though (totally not my fault at all), but there's still the occasional roleplay, contest, coup attempt, furry orgy, Misty burning, etc.
2016-09-17 Lazlo52: That all does sound like fun, but there's one majour flaw in your recruitment strategy: I'm a shy mother fucker. This is the most outspoken I've been and likely ever will be. After the topic shifts away from me, I'll go hide in the friscal year of 04/05. And even then, I won't be reading it yet thanks to all the things I have to juggle already.
Really, once we're done talking about me, I'll have nothing to talk about.
2016-09-17 [~Crimson Angel~]:
Misty burnings are the best, they keep burning her, but she won't die, she's like this fucker from Torchwood... Except not nearly as sexy.


  

2016-09-18 [Nuktae-tal]: yyyaaaaasssss
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *kills Misty*


*she dies*


Anyway, now that we have that over with, let's make some quality comments again.
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: 
2016-09-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, Bob's Diner is now serving yogurt!


  

2016-09-25 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-09-28 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-10-01 [Sideways]: What in the mongoloid-clumsy-fuck is going on here?
2016-10-02 [~Crimson Angel~]: Boredom mother fucker, boredom is what is going on here.
2016-10-06 [Nuktae-tal]: YES!!!YES!!!
2016-10-06 [Sheamus Finn]:   
2016-10-06 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-15 Lazlo52: Hey... They changed the knock-off Captcha puzzle to be easier to figure out. Now I don't feel as special for solving it...


Oh... Nevermind. I still screwed it up anyway.
2016-10-18 [Nuktae-tal]: I am confused nbow
2016-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a captcha for non-users now?!
2016-10-19 Rapey Raperson: Hmm... I don't see any captchas...
2016-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Nevermind, there's a weird thing there now that forces you to type in two characters.


  

2016-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: When the hell did [Hedda] ever get around to actually doing something?!
2016-10-19 Rapey Raperson: *testing stuff*
2016-10-19 Not Rapey Raperson: This doesn't seem very secure. Plus, I liked the occasional shitposting bot. :(
2016-10-20 [Nuktae-tal]: lol!!!! This is funny!
2016-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-10-22 [Nuktae-tal]: I like you all very much! And I mean that *takes more bites out of each person*
2016-10-22 [Sideways]: Rapey Raperson took the "Mc" out of their name because they are ashamed of their Irish heritage! *Rapes an Irishman*
2016-10-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Call me a rapist all you want, just don't call me Irish.
2016-10-23 a heron: i am a heron. i haev a long neck and i pick fish out of the water w/ my beak. if you dont repost this comment on 10 other pages i will fly into your kitchen tonight and make a mess of your pots and pans
2016-10-23 [Nuktae-tal]: Too bad! *steals heron's fish*
2016-10-24 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2016-10-25 [Sideways]: Individjul sitchoowayshun
2016-10-25 [Nuktae-tal]: NNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooose
2016-10-26 [Sideways]:   
2016-10-26 Lazlo52: Hey, can I use the diner's wi-fi to order delivery from Domino's?
2016-10-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Take my wi-fi... please.


DEUS VULT! *unsheathes his sword and leaps out the window*
2016-10-28 [Nuktae-tal]: ooooh crusaders!
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: I am everywhere...
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: I am everything...
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: I am everyone...
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: You cannot run...
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: You cannot hide...
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: There is no escape...
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: I am God!
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: Fear me....
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: Worship me!
2016-10-29 Sonic the hedgehog: 
2016-10-29 [Nuktae-tal]: nah I'm good *eats kids meal*
2016-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: But if Sonic is everyone, then he's me. And if I'm him and he's God, then I'm God. And if I'm God, then that means I CAN FLY!!


*leaps excitedly out of the 79th story window of the diner*


*plummets quickly up into the sky*
2016-10-31 a heron: I WARNED YOU. I WARNED YOU ALL!


*flies into the kitchen and makes a mess of the pots and pans*
2016-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: NO, I WARNED YOU!


*grabs the heron by the neck and angrily stuffs it into one of the pots*


*tosses the pot into the soup*


Wait, or was that the seagull I warned...?


*shrugs and tosses the seagull into the soup just in case*
2016-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2016-11-03 [Nuktae-tal]: teeheehee
2016-11-08 [Mortified Penguin]: One more hour until the polls close. I assume everyone voted straight Ramen Party?


*eats ramen*
2016-11-10 [Nuktae-tal]: I am all for curly ramen party!
2016-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *sneaks up behind you and starts choking you with a noodle*


STRAIGHT NOODLES ONLY.


*the noodle breaks mid-strangle*


*shrugs and eats the noodle*
2016-11-15 [Nuktae-tal]: *Licks Morts hands* mmmm
2016-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Hand. Singular.


*starts to tear up at the memory of lefty and wipes his eyes with his hook*
2016-11-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *Licks hook too* mmm pirates
2016-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Pirate. Singular.


*starts to tear up at the memory of Jimmy and wipes his eyes with Jimmy's corpse*


Jimmy was a pirate, by the way. That's why pirate was singular. Because Jimmy was a pirate.
2016-11-27 clever joke: It's not Jimmy, it's Sprinkle!
2016-11-29 [Nuktae-tal]: Arg! I got Pirate on me! *pulls of belt and sash and manacles.* Ew... *pulls off pants.*
2016-11-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Well, we found her booty.....lol
2016-11-30 [Nuktae-tal]: Yar har diddlee day! I AM A PIRATE!
2016-12-09 [Mortified Penguin]: I SAID NO PIRATES!


*snaps Sprinkle's corpse in half over his knee and hurls Nutcake-tall into traffic*


Wait, did I say no pirates...? *scratches his chin with his hook*... *bleeds all over the cash register from his various hook wounds*
2016-12-12 [Nuktae-tal]: NOPE! * is bleeding and dying from being run over so many times*
2017-01-12 []: *eats ramen*
2017-01-13 that New guy: Oh, good, I was worried I'd have to make the first comment about pigeons.
By the way, you might need to take your Nuktae-Nutcake to a doctor. Medical or witch, whatever you prefer.
2017-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Nah, it's fine.


*retrieves Nuke-em-all's liver from a nearby rattrap and staples it violently to her leg*


See? Fine.


*the poor rats go hungry*
2017-01-13 [nokaredes]: Dang, I missed the opportunity to make the first comment of 2017 only by a few hours.
2017-01-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: At least you're currently tied for top commenter of 2017.
2017-01-13 [nokaredes]: That's because nobody comes here anymore!
2017-01-13 [Mortified Penguin]: You'll see! This friscal year will be different! We just have to BELIEVE!


*crawls back into the oven and sleeps until April*
2017-01-14 purple dragon: You gotta BELIIIIEEEEVE!! heh.
2017-01-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I come here! *bleeds profusely from leg and liver and hole in body* *feeds rats small bits of liver.*
2017-01-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I come here often in fact!
2017-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Prove it!
2017-01-16 [Sheamus Finn]: I came here.....Pedro was young he needed the money....
2017-01-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, now he's dead. Are you happy?


ARE YOU?!


*Mort's horse/lover turns away and munches some hay*


YOU GODDAMN BITCH, I GAVE YOU EVERYTHING!!
2017-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *steals horse and takes Pedro's corpse on a lovely ride*
2017-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: She's not lovely, she's a DIRTY WHORSE.
2017-01-24 [Sheamus Finn]: At least she can't NAG you anymore.....
2017-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Well, she's still on my family plan, so...
2017-01-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *rides family plan too*
2017-01-29 [Sideways]: *repeals Obamacare*
2017-02-04 [Stephen]: 177 comments in a year?
Ouch.


Hey Mort, message me when you're around. :P
2017-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: NEVER!!
2017-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]:
>look around
You see a post.


:
:>
:
:3
:


You wonder who could be behind it.
>_
2017-02-15 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-02-15 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-02-18 [Nuktae-tal]: OH MY!!
2017-03-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *angrily throws a grain of salt to the floor*
2017-03-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *adds pepper* we serve nothing but the best!! *pours all the pepper*
2017-03-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Please stop serving customers out of my personal stash of edible food. They're only allowed to eat out of the food pile.


*quick draws his sword and blasts some guy trying to eat out of the food pile*


NOT THAT FOOD PILE, THE ONE WITH THE SNAKES!


*slow draws his gun and stabs some girl trying to escape the snake pile*


STOP STRUGGLING, YOU'RE UPSETTING THE PYTHON!


*mutters to himself while sweeping up the pepper/dirt/snake crumbs and pouring them into his shirt pocket*
2017-03-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks Pius* mmmm piles.... * whispers softly*
2017-03-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Stop licking my python.
2017-03-25 [Donate to Elftown!]: !
2017-03-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm going to have to ask you to calm down.


I SAID CALM DOWN!! *starts choking Bukkake-towel*
2017-03-30 [Nuktae-tal]: WWWAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!! *startes running around and pulling hair out*
2017-04-02 [Nuktae-tal]: Why is no one talking here?! I feel like I'm alone! *cuddles suspicious goop from a pot Paco was attempting to wrestle onto the stove*
2017-04-04 [Nuktae-tal]: AAALLLL by mySSEEEELLLLFFFF!!!! *sings badly*
2017-04-06 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-04-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *humps car* FUCKERY!!!
2017-04-07 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-04-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I swear to God, if you get my car pregnant one more time...
2017-04-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *prius honk and flips its hood open*
2017-04-07 creep: I, for one, approve of relationships with vehicles.
*blows a kiss to a passing Hummer*
2017-04-08 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-04-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *drives his Prius down to the abortion clinic*
2017-04-09 [Nuktae-tal]: *holds prius hand*
2017-04-10 [Nuktae-tal]: WAIT! I'm not the mother! I'm actually... the sister!!!
2017-04-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *drives his Prius right through the wall of the clinic*


SHUT UP AND PUT THE FETUSES IN THE BAG!!


*waves a sword around threateningly*
2017-04-11 [Nuktae-tal]: *sobs and hands over candy*
2017-04-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats a handful of red gummibears and/or fetuses before getting back into his Prius and heading down to the local quarry to drag race*
2017-04-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *pulls up in winabago* Vroom Vroom bitch!
2017-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *revs his engine threateningly*


Heh heh... you fool! You will never defeat me, for you see... *presses a hidden button on his dashboard*... I have a secret weapon!!


*a panel on the roof of his Prius slides back, revealing... A FIFTH WHEEL!!*
2017-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes drifting in on his badass new tricycle*


*slashes Mort's roof tire*


HA HA! Now you have NO CHANCE!


*revs his tricycle*
2017-04-12 [Mortified Penguin]: MY ROOF TIRE!!!


Heh heh... luckily, I planned for this... *presses a hidden button on his leg*


*a panel on the windshield of his Prius slides back, revealing... A WINDSHIELD WIPER!!*


*snaps off the windshield wiper and brutally stabs Turkey with it*


*stabs Misty too... just in case*
2017-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: Heh... *coughs up blood*... heh... I- *coughs up more blood*... I planned for this... *smirks slyly, while blood runs down the corner of his mouth*... *presses a hidden button on his dashboard*... I have... a secret weapon...


*a panel on the roof of his tricycle starts to slide back, but jams and catches fire*


*the tricycle burns to the ground*


*dies*
2017-04-12 [Sagacious Turkey]: *his corpse revs the pile of ashes*
2017-04-13 Somebody: I place my bet on the quarry!
*throws down an empty water bottle*
2017-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: But that was my water bottle...   
2017-04-13 [Nuktae-tal]: *fills quarry with water* take that bottle! How do you like it bitch!
2017-04-13 [Sheamus Finn]: *pats Mort's shoulder* It had a good life.....
2017-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: The hell it did. I was constantly sexually abusing it.
2017-04-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Now where am I supposed to get another water bottle?! *drop kicks the water bottle he was just sipping from into traffic, causing a passing Dasani truck to swerve and crash into an Aquafina truck*


*both trucks explode, sending water bottles flying everywhere*


WHERE, DAMN YOU?!


*takes a sip from the other water bottle that was in his other hand*
2017-04-13 [Nuktae-tal]: ooh candy!* picks up water bottle lid, attempts to eat startes chocking to death slowly. horribly slowly.*
2017-04-14 EMT: I got a Band-Aid® over here!
2017-04-15 [Nuktae-tal]: *squeaks hysterically*
2017-04-17 [Nuktae-tal]: *Squeaks more frantically*
2017-04-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: *continues revving his pile of ashes*
2017-04-18 [~Crimson Angel~]:
I'm surrounded by idiots...


  

2017-04-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks doctor* mmm time travel my favorite flavour!
2017-04-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *also revs Turkey's pile of ashes*
2017-04-20 [Nuktae-tal]: ahahahaha this place is so much fun!
2017-04-21 [Mortified Penguin]: DO YOU THINK THIS IS SOME KIND OF GAME?!


*angrily backhands Necktie-till*


*gains 300xp and levels up*
2017-04-22 [Nuktae-tal]: *bites the back hand* wheeeee!!!! Swing me around!!!
2017-04-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MY BACK HAND!! *starts slapping Naked-turtle with his left hand, right hand, side hand, front hand, back hand, leg hand, neck hand, et al.*
2017-04-23 [Nuktae-tal]: EEEEEEE!!!! *continues being happy*
2017-04-25 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-04-28 [Nuktae-tal]: OOOOoooOOOOOOooo tasty images!
2017-04-29 [Mortified Penguin]:   



  




  




  




  




  




  




  




  




  




  

2017-04-30 [Nuktae-tal]: That... is a lot of theories... and science.... I like it!
2017-05-02 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-05-02 [Nuktae-tal]: okay *sad face*
2017-05-03 Suddenly,: Oh! Happy birthday, Crimson Angel!
2017-05-03 [Nuktae-tal]: what?!
2017-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: My birthday is in November...
2017-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: And besides, we don't wish people happy birthday around here! *slaps Suddenly,*


*goes back to stapling up steamers for his dog's birthday party*
2017-05-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *staples one of the streamers to Misty's face*
2017-05-03 [~Crimson Angel~]: Ah, it's an improvement, I love it.
2017-05-04 [Nuktae-tal]: I like it tooQ! *runs around happily*
2017-05-05 Suddenly,: *rubs slap wound*


Well, I was referring to the other Crimson Angel...


*crashes through a window*
2017-05-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: MY STAINED GLASS WINDOW!!


Who stained it?! DAMMIT, NOK! *harpoons Misty*
2017-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *staples a "Missing autistic dog" flyer to Misty's face*   
2017-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *staples one to the harpoon as well*
2017-05-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *staples a miniature flyer to the staple with a really tiny stapler*
2017-05-10 [Nuktae-tal]: *pokes Mort*
2017-05-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoves Mort to the ground*
2017-05-12 [Nuktae-tal]: *rides mort's back on the way down.*
2017-05-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *raves*
2017-05-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Weirdos... *counts rutabagas behind the register*
2017-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: *breaks open a roll of radishes and pours them into a slot in the register*
2017-05-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... now, where did I put those turnips...?


*eats ramen*
2017-05-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *steals ramen* in the back of Paco
2017-05-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... now, where did I put that ramen...?


*eats turnips*
2017-05-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *pours ramen over toes* aaaahhh just like mother used to make.
2017-05-30 [Nuktae-tal]: Hello?!
Am I alone again
I don't like being alone again
all the alone


all the time




everytime
2017-05-30 [Sheamus Finn]: No one is ever alone at Bob's....


*Throws a glass at Paco* MORE MEAD!!
2017-05-31 [Araglas]: I NEED MORE ZOMBIES DAMNIT!!! SOMEONE GET A HOLD OF UMBRELLA FOR ME!!!
2017-06-01 [Nuktae-tal]: *opens rainbow umbrella* holding sir!
2017-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: But, seriously though... why did Jesus kill that fig tree?!
2017-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: I ASKED YOU A QUESTION!! *starts kicking Auraglass*
2017-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *duct tapes Hourglass's mouth and ears closed*


WELL?! ANSWER ME!!


*throws Whoreass into the truck of his car*
2017-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-06-02 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-06-03 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-06-03 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-06-05 [Nuktae-tal]: lol!!!!
2017-06-05 [A Wise Sage]: But how does that make you feel, Kuntea-alt?


*takes notes on his arm*
2017-06-07 [Nuktae-tal]: LMAO!!
2017-06-18 Some Loser: I do not get it. What is the joke with the cute snakies?
2017-06-21 [Mortified Penguin]: You wouldn't get it, it's a subtle, esoteric meta-joke aimed at Misty. She knows what it means. SHE KNOWS.


*goes back to snorting crack rocks under his desk*
2017-06-22 [Nuktae-tal]: *mines rocks*
2017-06-22 [Sheamus Finn]: *Rocks mines*
2017-06-22 [Nuktae-tal]: MY MINES *falls into hole in ground*
2017-06-22 [Sheamus Finn]: Oh no, Nuk got the Shaft!!
2017-06-22 [Nuktae-tal]: WAAHHH!! It's sticky and hot in here! *echoes*
2017-06-22 [Sheamus Finn]: *starts checking for a PG or NC-17 rating*
2017-06-22 [Nc-17]: I give it a perfect 5/7.
2017-06-22 [Nc-17]: Yup, second best shaft I've ever seen.


*sighs and thinks longingly of his former horse*
2017-06-23 [Nuktae-tal]: I found a bunch a white things down here! *squishy noises*
2017-06-23 The Same Loser?: Oh? Hey, DM, make it a dragon!
2017-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *the hole full of white things suddenly becomes a great Urulókë, wreathed in flames*


You...


- Use the Sword of Ultimate Despair to slay him

- Use the Butterknife of Extreme Sorrow to slightly wound him

- Snort more crack rocks

- Charge him extra for refills




*Mort snorts more crack rocks*


*Mort gains 60xp, 200 gold, and the Ring of Heroism*
2017-06-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *Mort now owns the ultimate weapon in dragon slaying, the Ring of Heroism!*


You...




- Use the Ring of Heroism to slay the dragon

- Use the Butterknife of Extreme Sorrow to slay some toast

- Snort more crack rocks

- Hock the Ring of Heroism to buy more Crack Rocks




*Mort continues snorting crack*


*Mort gains 500 gold from the pawn shop in exchange for the Ring of Heroism*


*Mort buys, like, a lot more crack... like, a LOT*
2017-06-25 [Nuktae-tal]: hahahaha *wears ring she pretended to be a pawn shop to buy off mort.*
2017-06-25 [Mortified Penguin]: I feel so used... :(


*continues snorting crack rocks and rolling around in his pile of gold*
2017-06-25 [~Crimson Angel~]: Prostitutes always feel used, it's their nature.
2017-06-26 [Nuktae-tal]: *rubs mort in nature too*
2017-07-01 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY! What happened to all the customers?


*notices some deer grazing in the kitchen*


Nevermind, there they are.
2017-07-01 [Nuktae-tal]: *buys pie with deer scat*
2017-07-02 [Sheamus Finn]: *passes on deer scat pie, rebrands it chocolate surprise pie!*
2017-07-02 [Nuktae-tal]: I like this crap better* eats pie*
2017-07-02 Lunatic: Yeah, hello, I'd like a cheeseburger with no taste.
2017-07-02 [Sheamus Finn]: What do we look like McDonald's? *goes back to butchering clowns* One McRib comin' up!
2017-07-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *slowly draws the curtains, so nobody can see the large, neon 'M' glowing in the parking lot*
2017-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *has now finished drawing one of the curtains*... *sharpens his pencil and starts on the second one*
2017-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *meanwhile, the 'M' continues glowing menacingly*
2017-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *there is also a hissing 'N', but nobody seems to pay it any mind*
2017-07-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah, somebody order a burger nine days ago...


*smashes a taco full of clown meat into a tube sock and throws it up into the ceiling fan*


There you go, that'll be $20 plus *sticks his hands in the pile of mush* handling fees.
2017-07-11 The Late Lunatic: *already succumbed to starvation*
2017-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs and throws the corpse up into the ceiling fan*
2017-07-13 [Mortified Penguin]: That ceiling fan has really paid for itself. That damn table, on the other hand, keeps trying to charge me rent... *gestures at the landlord laying motionless on the ground*
2017-07-14 [Mortified Penguin]: 48 days until the end of the friscal year...
2017-07-15 Dönation: Here, I'll donate a doner kebab!
2017-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: That's stupid. Just give us money.
2017-07-19 Donåtion: O-Ohhh...... Well, let's see what I have...?


*a butterfly floats out of the opened wallet*


Er... Maybe that butterfly's worth a few!
2017-07-19 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not money. We have a fiscal economy here, we can't keep the lights on with nonsense.


*shakes his head and pours more butterflies into the generator*
2017-07-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: It seems now the only way to pay the bills is through the power of prayer.


*starts praying as evil spirits begin to rise from the ground*


*they start lining up behind the register to order some food*
2017-07-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I'M ON BREAK!!


*the evil spirits wait patiently, while Mort clips his toenails over the salad bowl*
2017-07-23 [Sideways]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: DON'T COMPARE US TO CNN! We only feed our supporters half as much shit.
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-07-23 [Sideways]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-07-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah, what did happen to Paco?! I haven't seen him since January...
2017-07-24 [Avoral]: Whoa there, how do we have users with no links, what is this sorcery
2017-07-25 [Delta Operator]: The world of ET is slowly wilting away. Is this the last bastion of civilization at Bob's Diner?
2017-07-25 [Avoral]: I was actually kinda thinking the same thing, it feels like Bob's Diner is this sort of mom-and-pop diner sitting on the brink of an outstretched void slowly consuming all of reality, and it's just operating like nothing's going on, and when you bring it up everyone just kinda shrugs
2017-07-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in through the expensive skylight*


WHERE'S THE GOLD?! *violently stabs [Delta Operator]*


Oh wait, here it is. In my gold sack.
2017-07-25 [Mortified Penguin]: MY GOLD SACK!!


Oh wait, here it is. In my gold sack box.
2017-07-26 Tops: It ain't easy being Linkless. Gotta type in two randomized letters each time! You think anyone else has these skittles!?
2017-07-26 [Avoral]: Huh. Not seeing anything about it on the ET pseudo-HTML guide, unless I'm overlooking it.
2017-07-26 [Delta Operator]: *bleeding* Alas, I perish. *dies*
2017-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: You can allow people who aren't logged into Elftown to comment on wikis and they can just pick whatever name they want.
2017-07-26 Not Mortified Penguin: Don't listen to him, he's lying!!
2017-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Anyway... *stabs Delta's corpse*


STOP BLEEDING ON MY CARPET.
2017-07-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *also stabs the carpet*


STOP SOAKING UP SO MUCH BLOOD.
2017-07-27 [Sideways]: Hey, I heard the health and safety inspector is coming soon. Do you guys remember back in '08, when the comission sent an Ed-209, right out of Robocop, only it's dual chainguns just fired written code violation citations at 600 rounds per minute?


*a whistling noise is heard from above*


What's that noise?


*a huge explosion damages the already ruined roof. As tinnitus and disorientation and shock stun the patrons, health code violations rain from the ceiling like confetti*
2017-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: No, that doesn't really sound familiar. I think I would remember something like that. Anyway, deliveries go around back.


*dusts off the layers of code violation confetti from his fancy suit and goes to get the ladder and some duct tape to fix what used to be the roof*
2017-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: *mutters angrily to himself as he duct tapes over a few bats clinging to the roof, trapping them in place*


NO SOLICITORS!


*punches one of the bats, causing an entire section of the roof to collapse on table #47, killing three customers and the mailman, on his way around back to deliver a package*
2017-07-27 [Mortified Penguin]: Ugh... can someone toss those corpses up into the ceiling fan? *points at the remains of the ceiling fan on the floor*


*goes back to duct taping screeching bats*


*they become one with the roof*
2017-07-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Mecha Turkey, oblivious, continues watching for Health Inspector robots out front*


Wait a second... Ah HA!! You thought I wouldn't see you coming?! YOU FOOL! *launches metallic feather blades at a biker happily biking down the sidewalk, slicing him in half and completely ruining his good mood*
2017-07-29 [Sideways]: *Rifles through the pockets of one of table 47's patrons*


Woah, that's weird. How come this guy has a pair of Kalashnikovs impaling his pants?


*looks up at what appears to be a hidden gun cache, exposed by the ceiling damage.*


  



*looks at the guy with "Delta" on his nametag*
2017-07-29 [Mortified Penguin]: Why is he wearing a nametag here? This isn't some damn class reunion. And what kind of stupid name is Delta anyway?! AND WHO KEEPS LETTING THESE OWLS IN HERE?! *punches a possum clinging to the roof, causing more rifles, handguns, and two or three bear skeletons to fall from the roof, impaling dozens more customers below and really messing up their "Class of '87" banner*
2017-07-29 [Nuktae-tal]: HULLO?!
2017-07-31 Bottoms: Can you clowns keep the noise down?! I'm trying to break my jaw on this sandwich!
2017-07-31 [Nuktae-tal]: I'll help *whicpers*
2017-08-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm going to have to ask you to take your sandwich and leave, sir. I don't want our patrons getting the impression they can get food here. As for our resident clowns, leave them be, they aren't hurting anybody.


*the clowns look up from the small child they were devouring and hiss menacingly*
2017-08-03 Bottoms: Alright, fine. I'll take my teeth and blood elsewhere!


*gets up to leave, but passes out on the floor*
2017-08-03 [Nuktae-tal]: *pee's on the floor* I'll clean it up later.
2017-08-05 [Sideways]:   
2017-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Allegedly!!


*pulls out his Beretta and starts pointing it at people*


WHERE'S MY POT ROAST?! I'm gonna check in the oven! It's probably in the oven! So I'll go to the oven! Now I'm heading to the oven! Walking toward the oven! Getting close to the oven! Rhyming oven with oven! Reaching out for the oven! Now my hand's on the oven! Now I'm opening the oven! It better be in this oven! Looking inside of the oven! And my roast is missing... missing... missing...... *the camera zooms in on Mort's disheartened face as it fades to black*
2017-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *the music starts back up again*


So here I am. In the kitchen. Checked the oven. My roast is missin'. Someone betta' tell me where it is. Someone betta'! Don't make me ask twice! I pull out a second Beretta! Take a shot of my whiskey! This is def'nitely twisty! The colonel's chicken is crispy! My nose hair is wispy! My ex doesn't miss me! And that's when I realized... it was probably MISTY! Misty... Misty...... *camera fades to black again*
2017-08-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *rather than perform part 60 of his suburban opera, Mort merely shoots Misty and crawls back into his closet for a nap*
2017-08-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stands outside, staring in through the window, occasionally licking the glass*
2017-08-06 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks the turkey*
2017-08-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: MY GIBLETS!
2017-08-06 [Sideways]: *Remains enthusiastically whiteboy dancing to Mort's music video long after the music fades*
2017-08-07 [Delta Operator]: *Revives* Can I have the chicken dish?
2017-08-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *eats giblets*
2017-08-09 B.S: Man, if you can eat your food while everybody else is losin' theirs, and blamin' you? You straight, homie!
2017-08-09 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks man too* Om nomnomnom
2017-08-10 [Avoral]: *Delayed reaction slow clap*
2017-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts clapping really fast with his flippers*
2017-08-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait, penguins do have flippers, right?
2017-08-11 [Nuktae-tal]: Sort of? *eats wings*
2017-08-12 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh, thank goodness. I thought I might be some kind of freak or something. *chuckles loudly from his beak and wipes his brow with a tentacle*
2017-08-12 Copier: The nonsense! Penguins don't need flippers if they have webbed feet!
2017-08-12 Copier: Wait, penguins do have submarines, right?
2017-08-12 [Sideways]:   
2017-08-13 [Mortified Penguin]: No, no... of course we don't have submarines, don't be ridiculous. *glances around nervously and puts a tarp over the large submarine shaped object in the kitchen*
2017-08-14 [Nuktae-tal]: *starts to eat tarp too* Man the food quality sure had gone up recently *chew chew chew*
2017-08-14 [Avoral]: Pinball machines have flippers
And Flipper is a dolphin
Ergo, what sort of horrifying machine are you
2017-08-15 [Nuktae-tal]: the best kind! Delicious! *puts more hot sauce on Mort*
2017-08-16 Fax Machine: *makes loud noises*
2017-08-16 [Mortified Penguin]: That tarp is coming out of your paycheck!! *slaps [Delta Operator] condescendingly*


*goes back to faxing important documents to corporate*


Damn Larry, always on my case... *angrily shoves a wad of paper into the tray* Send those reports... finish that itemization... *dials corporate* update that spreadsheet... stop stabbing customers... serve real food... like to see him try to work the damn register... always in his stupid office... with his stupid... *presses send*... stupid tie... *the paper jams up, sending Mort into a rage*... *three customers are stabbed, but that's probably unrelated to all this*
2017-08-16 [Avoral]: *Checks calendar*
*Notes it's stabbing season*
*Continues reading tomorrow's newspaper*
2017-08-16 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks stabbing victems*
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *stabs the licking victims*
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: WE HAVE THIRTEEN DAYS LEFT. WE NEED 6000+ MORE COMMENTS THIS YEAR IF WE HOPE TO MEET OUR GOAL OF 6000+ COMMENTS.
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
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2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... now I've posted so much stuff you can't see my threats telling people to post more stuff before the end of the friscal year...
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs and goes back to stabbing things*
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: We're at 39173 comments now, according to Elftron. Let's see if it updates when I post this.
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: It did!
2017-08-17 [Mortified Penguin]: We're only at 337 comments so far this year. That's pretty terrible and obviously Misty's fault.
2017-08-18 [Sideways]: It got very dank in here
2017-08-18 [Sheamus Finn]: I thought that was stank....or rank......or that Misty smells like crank?
2017-08-18 Smug Liar: I feel obliged to contribute, but I don't know what to say.....
2017-08-19 [Sideways]: I can help by just pretending to be random pedestrians from Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas.
*ahem.*


"That nigga had me on Crystal Meth."
2017-08-21 Too Old: You havin' fun over there?
2017-08-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *uses base ball bat in unlikely way* Surprise!
2017-08-22 [Sideways]: That's... neat. *takes picture*
2017-08-25 Cockroach: *skitters by*
2017-08-25 [Nuktae-tal]: MOUSE! *jumps on cockroach*
2017-08-26 Waver: Whoa! I'm flagging this for sexual content!
2017-08-26 [Mortified Penguin]: The mice around here really are degenerate sluts.


*another cockroach skitters by, showing off her cleavage and wearing a tiny mini skirt*


WHORE!
2017-08-27 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-08-27 [Sideways]: What? Misty returns?
2017-08-27 [Nuktae-tal]: *humps totoro*
2017-08-29 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-08-29 [Avoral]: YAMETE
2017-08-30 [Nuktae-tal]: He liked it! *rapes totoro*
2017-08-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Who the hell is Misty?! And whatever happened to that Amebara guy?!
2017-08-31 [~Crimson Angel~]:
I'm sorry Amebara can't come to the phone right now. Why? Oh, cause they're dead!
  

2017-08-31 [Nuktae-tal]: SSSSSNNNNAAAAAKKKKEEEEE IIIIINNNN MMMMYYYYY BOOOOOOTTTSSS!!!!
2017-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't joke about snakes like that.
2017-08-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Last day of the friscal year!
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: So
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: we
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: have
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: 22
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: hours
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: of
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: posts
2017-09-01 [Sheamus Finn]: left?
2017-09-01 [Sideways]: Disappointment awaits!
2017-09-01 xxBigL98xx: Hi, [@48441]: 
2017-09-01 xxBigL98xx:  
2017-09-01 xxBigLOSER93xx: I knew I hated the meme-moji. Forget it. I'll creep everyone out some other time.
2017-09-01 [Nuktae-tal]: HI! HELLO!
2017-09-01 [Nuktae-tal]: Hello?! yodel le he hoo?!
2017-09-01 [Nuktae-tal]: anyone there?
2017-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: No! Stop asking!
2017-09-03 [Mortified Penguin]: I SAID STOP ASKING!! *assaults a small child asking if we have bathrooms*
2017-09-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: *comes strolling out of bathroom #3659*


Ahh, everything went smoothly.


*wipes his hands on Misty and continues strolling out into traffic*
2017-09-05 [Nuktae-tal]: *pushes Turkey in front of car.* so smooth
2017-09-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: HYUUHHH!! *grabs the oncoming car and hurls it into the sky*


FOOL, NO CAR CAN DEFEAT ME!
2017-09-08 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws kitten at Turkey* CAT BUS!!! GOOOO!!! USE TACKLE!
2017-09-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *the kitten hits the ground with a thud and lies motionless in the street*


Not cool, man. That kitten had a name! And dreams! And a family! And was already seasoned!


*kicks the kitten and storms off to the cat shed to grab another one and start the recipe over*
2017-09-08 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws puppy on grill* I got a few puppies over here too!
2017-09-09 [Avoral]: 0/10 worst cat ever, every cat I've ever thrown at someone has survived the impact
2017-09-10 [Nuktae-tal]: It's not the ingredients fault it's the kook!
2017-09-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps the kook*


USE BETTER INGREDIENTS!!
2017-09-17 [Nuktae-tal]: lllllllooooooooooollllllolololololololol * starts singing trololololol song*
2017-09-17 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT THE HELL DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?!


*grabs you by the throat*


  

(visual approximation, not to scale)
2017-09-17 [Nuktae-tal]: Lo- BLAGH!! *begans bleeding and spraying all over Mort* OLOLOLOLOL!!! BLARGGHH!!!
2017-09-17 Sub: Ooh, lizards grabbing throats? Grab mine next!
2017-09-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm not touching that thing, when's the last time you even washed your throat?!


*scrubs his claws down with "soap" and "water"*
2017-09-20 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks claws* Now they are dry as well!
2017-09-21 [Mortified Penguin]: But you're dead. I... I killed you.
2017-09-21 [Nuktae-tal]: *is zombie*
2017-09-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Then why are you wrapped in toilet paper like a mummy?
2017-09-24 [Nuktae-tal]: I have gender identity problems.
2017-09-25 [Mortified Penguin]: That checks out.


*goes back to stirring the soup*... *dunks a finger in and tastes it*... Huh, this soup tastes like fingers. Weird...


*several severed fingers float to the top of the soup*


Oh right, it was probably all those fingers I put in there.
2017-09-26 [Nuktae-tal]: *adds tongue* mm ffff huwah hadh
2017-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: *smacks Nurka-der upside the head*


Go tend to table six, I think they're out of breadsticks and I can't handle anymore negative reviews on Yelp. *points at the booth with a dead homeless man in it*
2017-09-26 [Mortified Penguin]: And wipe down table seven, it hasn't been cleaned all day and we have customers waiting to be seated!


*angrily points at a booth with a severely decayed corpse wearing a "Happy New Year 2009" shirt*


*there is no one waiting to be seated*


Anyway, can I take your order, sir?


*there is no one ordering*


*writes down his order and hands it to the chef*


*there is no chef*


*there was never really even a diner, it was all just a dream*


*there was a cash register though*


*and table six still needs those breadsticks*
2017-09-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: First of all, *takes a bite out of a breadstick* we're out of breadsticks. And thirdly, you don't pay me enough to wait on these assholes who, by the way, NEVER TIP *glares at the corpses* and are always trying to sexually harass me! UGH!


*furiously rips up one of his daily wads of hundred dollar bills and storms into the Employee Olympic Pool & Spa &/or Whorehouse to get his fifth "massage" of the day to help "ease" his "stress"*
2017-09-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *fills corpses with snakes* Breadsticks refilled! *gives Turkey a "massage"*
2017-09-29 Cring: 'Eey, Lamar, I get it! They're snakes, and that rhymes with bakes, which is what you do with breadstick models when you add them to an Unreal game! You're so smart!
2017-09-29 Cring 2: Bake, cook, fry, same thing, shut up.
2017-09-29 [Nuktae-tal]: *ninja throw's breadsticks at Cringes.*
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: His name is Cring, not Cringes. *points at the sign on the wall that says, "No mocking people's names - THIS MEANS YOU, NUTCAKE-TOWEL!"*
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: And yeah, yeah, I'm getting around to fixing the friscal data, STOP RUSHING ME.
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]: We're currently at an average of 1.6 comments per day this friscal year! Which is terrible. Clearly, I need to send out threatening spam messages again.
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
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2017-09-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-09-30 [Nuktae-tal]: OH
2017-09-30 [Nuktae-tal]: MY
2017-09-30 [Nuktae-tal]: LANTA!
2017-09-30 [Nuktae-tal]: I LOVE ALL OF THOSE!
2017-09-30 [Nuktae-tal]: EVERY SINGLE
2017-09-30 [Nuktae-tal]: ONE!
2017-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Racist.
2017-10-01 Seeee-Oh: Dude, I can place an ad on this page for free?! Shame my company died out last year.
2017-10-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Maybe you should have run your company more like Bob's Diner. You have to treat your employees and customers with love and care.


*smiles warmly as tons of happy customers start lining up to order our delicious, healthy food*
2017-10-02 [Nuktae-tal]: MY CABBAGES!!!! * waves arms frantically and foams at the mouth hysterically*
2017-10-02 Unhappy Customer: You may treat your employees and customers that way, but what about your food?! Do you truly feel those Godzilla Eggs like being on the menu!? They could've grown up to decimate densely populated cities, but you treat them like just another breakfast item! For shaaame!
2017-10-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't be ridiculous, they aren't fertilized, obviously. And what would you have me do, be culturally insensitive? You know those stupid nips like eating lizard eggs. DON'T YOU, CHING CHONG?! *smacks an Australian man upside the head, causing him to choke on his vegemite and kangaroo burrito*
2017-10-03 [Nuktae-tal]: The chickens will consume us allll!!!!!! * begins doom mongering*
2017-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *briefly looks up from his feed, before going back to pecking and scratching at the floor*
2017-10-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pulls a worm out of the floorboards and chews it with his mighty bird teeth*
2017-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *slithers over on his powerful avian belly and hisses loudly before striking*
2017-10-03 Unhippy Consumer: If they're not fertilized, then where did my intact flesh go?! I am 99.98999% certain that intact flesh does not go places on its own, it needs outside help!
2017-10-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You never had intact flesh in the first place, just exposed muscles and sinews. Believe me, I would have noticed if you had flesh on when you walked in, I'm quite the flesh enthusiast and have a very impressive collection if I do say so myself. Now, if you're quite finished with your ridiculous, baseless accusations and rather rude bleeding on my carpet, I have a dance recital I must attend. HMPH! *slings his new, fresh flesh scarf over his shoulder and storms off into the freezer*
2017-10-04 [Nuktae-tal]: *locks the door and blare's screamo* Rock on party hard!
2017-10-04 Unhoppy Consummate: Mr. Peng, I know you're in there! I have new evidence that suggests..... -- *voice is drowned in the storm of loud music*
2017-10-05 [Nuktae-tal]: *shoots freezer with tommy gun old mob style* Say goodbye punks!
2017-10-05 [Mortified Penguin]: *walks out of the bathroom, licking his fingers*


The hell are you people doing to my freezer?
2017-10-05 [Nuktae-tal]: fixing it* smashed freezer with sledgehammer.*
2017-10-06 Unliving Considerate: *dead noises*
2017-10-06 [Nuktae-tal]: *throws hammer at Considerate* The confederates were better!?!?!?
2017-10-07 Uninviting Contour: Oh, God...! I'm dying...uh...!
2017-10-07 [Nuktae-tal]: I wanted to be invited! *throws toaster*
2017-10-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *grabs Undulating Confederate's spirit as it starts to exit the body and starts punching it in the face*


CUT THAT OUT, YOUR SHIFT ISN'T OVER FOR ANOTHER FIVE MINUTES!
2017-10-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *spoons timeclock* I love the way you demand things *giggles as clock punches her out*
2017-10-09 [Mortified Penguin]: Stop fraternizing with my timeclock and get back to work, that soup isn't going to stir itself!


*points at the soup, but notices it has begun stirring itself*


Well, those tables certainly aren't going to clean themsel-


*one of the tables starts scrubbing itself down with a sponge*


Huh. I guess you're fired then.
2017-10-10 [Nuktae-tal]: *fraternizws with register next.* I love the way your drawer sticks!
2017-10-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Because you won't stop pouring syrup in it.
2017-10-12 [Nuktae-tal]: sssshhhhhh he likes it *pours in honey*
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *shakes his head disapprovingly and rides away on his bicycle*


  

2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *makes sandwiches in his office*


  

2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: And now the paper guillotine is jammed.
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't be ridiculous, that's clearly jelly.
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: It's not clear, it's purple!
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws out the pile of sandwiches and starts wrapping up the crusts to sell to customers at reasonable prices*


Psst, hey, kid... wanna buy some sandwich flavored crusts for two thousand dollars?


"No." "Yes!"


Here you go, little boy!


"WHY ARE YOU STABBING ME? OH GOD, WHY?!" "Wow, these sure are some delicious sandwich flavored crusts, mister!"
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: And that's why I didn't bring up the waste of crusts.
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: It's not really purple, just purple flavored.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't waste food here at Bob's Cafe.
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Is that better than grape-flavored? Or at least sweeter than yellow-flavored?
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Not on the customers, at least.
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Yellow isn't a flavor. I told you to stop being ridiculous. If you're going to come barging in here and demand to be allowed to comment like this, you have to act a bit more reasonable.


*sensibly puts on his clown nose, sets fire to himself, and respectably cartwheels off into traffic*
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: TO HELL WITH THE CUSTOMERS!


*some customers angrily look up from the customer stuff they were doing*


Not you, I meant the other customers.


*they nod and return to their customer related business*
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Neither is grape. The appropriate term is "ew".


And I didn't "barge in". My presence is court-ordered.


(You have plural customers?)
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Then whose barge is that?! *points at a towboat crashed halfway into the diner/cafe*
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Bob's.
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Damn liar, the registration says the owner is named Robert.
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Really? I thought that was the anchor's name?
2017-10-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: No, no. That's Burgundy, I believe.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts collecting barnacles for his new Awful Tasting Barnacle Salad℠ (now served with a side of sea cucumber sandwiches... they taste alright, I guess)*
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: But it's mauve!


*to Mort* Is there a Shell-free version and an Extra-Crunchy! version?
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: There is no shell-free version, unfortunately. We do have a Garden Slug Salad® though (now served with real garden slugs)!


*quickly hides a pile of empty snail shells in his desk drawer*
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Aw. But I would have paid extra for Extra-Crunchy...
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: I suppose we could deep fry the salad to add a little extra crunch...


*dunks the salad bowl in the soup and pulls out a glorious, delicious, crispy, deep fried platter of onion rings*


Wait, that's not it...


*puts the onion rings back in the soup and pulls out a bowl of soggy, disgusting smelling salad, soaked in soup*


Here you are! *spits in the salad and throws it onto the floor*


WHERE'S MY TIP?!
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Here's the tip: There's too much oil in that soup.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: But it's vegetable oil, so it's healthy.


*a passing diseased owl accidentally crash lands in the soup*


*it shrieks loudly and thrashes about for a few seconds, but quickly begins to melt and finally dissolves into the soup*


*slaps a "premium" label on the soup and raises the price by two dollars*
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Well now there's too much owl in that soup.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: But it's vegetable owl, so it's healthy.
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: But owls are carnivores.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Are you implying carnivals aren't healthy?!
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: Of course not! I have a ferris wheel omelet every morning for breakfast.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not possible... we don't serve ferris wheel omelets here...
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: I don't eat breakfast here. Just lunch.
2017-10-13 [Mortified Penguin]: TRAITOR! And after all we've considered doing for you!!


*breaks down in tears and sobs mournfully while eating some ramen*
2017-10-13 [ancienteye]: The only thing you've considered doing is overcharging me on greasy barnacles.
2017-10-14 [Mortified Penguin]: There was an old lettuce core in there too, you know... *eats ramen*...
2017-10-14 [ancienteye]: Slimy and greasy, then. My apologies.
2017-10-14 [Nuktae-tal]: WHAT?! WHAT>?! WHAT!>>?
2017-10-14 [ancienteye]: Would you like to try the barnacle salad?
2017-10-14 [Nuktae-tal]: Can I have a Clam Bake instead? Just the shells though none of that gross stuff inside.
2017-10-14 [Delta Operator]: It seems we are requested to make small donations to the Bob's Diner economy. Here's my two cents. BYE!
2017-10-15 [Sideways]: Christ on a bicycle, the spam!!!
2017-10-15 [ancienteye]: I didn't know they served spam here.
2017-10-15 [General]: This shit is so annoying. -.-;
2017-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: Fried spam with eggs and toast!!
2017-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Spam? There's no spam here, this is an institute of higher learning, not some greasy dive.


*adjusts his teaching spectacles*


Anyway, as I was lecturing, when taking the derivative of a composite of functions, you have to use the chain rule...


*starts whipping [General] with a large chain*


TAKE THAT DERIVATIVE, BITCH. TAKE IT HARD.
2017-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: *speaks up from the back of the classroom*


When are we getting to the power rule...?
2017-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: *menacingly holds up a power saw*


SOON. But do take notes, this will be on the exam.


*chain whips the pen and paper out of [Delta Operator]'s hands*


I SAID TAKE NOTES!
2017-10-15 [Sagacious Turkey]: Man, I hate this class... school is for losers...


*angrily carves swastika dicks into his desk*


"Please stop! I'm not a desk!!"


*kicks the old man he's sitting on top of in the ribs with his spurs*


*continues carving swastika dicks as his desk simply sobs*
2017-10-15 [Sideways]: Sir, I don’t think a power saw is necessary to cut spam. Maybe it’s not tender enough for a fork, but I am pretty sure a common table knife will serve.
2017-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: The British police already came through and rounded up all our common (as well as uncommon) table knives, so now we should all be a lot safer. Now please sit your acid burned face back down and pay attention, because I'm not going to repeat myself. I SAID I'M NOT GOING TO REPEAT MYSELF.


*three cars crash into the classroom and some tanned Brits start heroically passing out free acid samples*
2017-10-15 [Hedda]: I fixed the polls... They still don't have questions though :P
2017-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: I mainly just like the aesthetics, they don't need no fancy questions or answers.
2017-10-15 [Emily June]: I wish to unsubscribe to Bob's Weekly Mailing List, even though I'll miss out on all sorts of amazing deals! Just kidding, don't opt me out, I wish to receive even more updates, because I just can't get enough of Bob's Diner's new Food Pile Buffet! Now starting at only $4.7 million! WARNING: Bob's Diner's new Food Pile Buffet may not be food, but rather a stack of corpses and silverware that we wanted to get rid of. It's still probably worth the price though.
2017-10-15 [Mortified Penguin]: You have now been unsubscribed to Bob's Weekly Mailing List and instead been signed up for Bob's Tri-Weekly Mailing List! It's basically the same thing as our weekly mailing list, but it sends the same thing five times a week. The "tri-weekly" part is just a lie.
2017-10-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I love lie's !! They are educational and delicious!
2017-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Clearly, I need to spam more. *starts working on B's D ads 13-600*
2017-10-16 [Sideways]:   
2017-10-16 [Nuktae-tal]: I love this place!! *sits in a box*
2017-10-16 [Nuktae-tal]: And! I like spam too! *opens spam can and licks it*
2017-10-17 [Yuriona]: You're lucky to have that cardboard box! We only had a paper bag and it had a tear up one side!


And no more spam for me please. I'm quite full up thank you.
2017-10-17 [Sideways]:   
2017-10-17 [Sideways]:   
2017-10-18 An Allosaurus' Bicuspid: An Elftown ad on Elftown. Good marketing strategies here.
2017-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: You didn't use the proper cancellation phrase, Yuriona. Unfortunately, this means I'll have to sign you up for Bob's Nonstop Spamming, Threatening, and Sexual Harassment mailing list. Please give Paco your home address, so he knows where to start mailing my hair.
2017-10-18 [Mortified Penguin]: And Bob's Diner isn't associated with Elftown. We're basically an independent city state with our own laws. Also, slavery. And we have no age of consent either.
2017-10-18 [Yuriona]: Noted. That just means I have to track down and ban every single freaking clone house you have... wait, that's most of the active members here now isn't it?
2017-10-18 [Sideways]: I heard you hired a recently deposed Hollywood studio mogul for the sexual harassment department


  

2017-10-19 [rBob'sDine]: ha
2017-10-19 [erBob'sDin]: ha
2017-10-19 [nerBob'sDi]: ha 
2017-10-19 [inerBob'sD]: ha 
2017-10-19 [DinerBob's]: ha  
2017-10-19 [sDinerBob']: ha
2017-10-19 ['sDinerBob]: ha
2017-10-19 [b'sDinerBo]: ha 
2017-10-19 [ob'sDinerB]: ha
2017-10-19 [Bob'sDiner]: ha  
2017-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't ban those clones, they're my friends. And also I like doing this with them:


  



But I can make infinite clones you know, what with the whole invite system giving me infinite invite links:


http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=rbiqi8pK
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=mNL9CEnp
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=MPEAEpWp
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=6TbnQm4Y
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=id6tNiFj
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=nXZTmGRt
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=XFsehaNQ
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=n68z7GWH
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=xDztDn8D
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=ai2ZRNgB
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=YdLFgray
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=6sTNMV4E
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=8DDQ9KMT
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=hgeKeKGg
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=4JGw8G6k
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=x9RekKNG
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=ysQDcWyE
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=gjHN7LqM
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=w4VNRdqR
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=tdqwivKY
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=TyDbmLnx
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=hDnGJQti
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=JpxhnWVd
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=H6m2LBGV
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=cLCnAHeA
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=nke7F2BC
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=p2qGCF7f
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=kxyftNsi
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=fyMcZBbR
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=6zmKHVA4
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=GSR7zSDX
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=wrdiqzTc
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=9jtLsD6C
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=Zp6iFpNE
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=DaCptbmp
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=YpSjf2zh
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=pE8kXL4w
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=VJG9AvHi
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=byiTr6aY
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=E8TQ6Gd7
etc.
2017-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Besides, I need my clones, because people keep trying to block all my invites for some reason and I have to send them from different houses. It's really annoying.
2017-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: I would advertise for the other branches, but I've always secretly hated them for their success.


http://elfpack.com/wiki.html?name=bob%27s%20diner
http://fake.swedma.com/wiki.html?name=bob%27s%20diner



Also, I'm pretty sure linkmeet has one too... and that other Heddate site... *eats ramen*...
2017-10-19 [Yuriona]: Nothing better than the original. :P
2017-10-19 [Mortified Penguin]: Except maybe McDonald's. Have you heard about their new buttermilk chicken tenders? With the power of milk and butter combined, chicken has never tasted so edible! Now with 15% less woody fibers and chicken bones! I'm lovin' it!


*quietly takes a large roll of cash from a grotesque, shadowy, hooded clown figure*


*after getting paid by Misty's whore mother he's pimping out, Mort then accepts a bribe from a McDonald's spokesperson*
2017-10-20 [Nuktae-tal]: *smiles obliquely*
2017-10-20 [Yuriona]: I'm not sure they're available here in Canada. I live out in the sticks and don't get to McDonalds very often. (Our KFC's don't even have mashed potatoes or grits!)
2017-10-20 [Mortified Penguin]: But without mashed potatoes, how do they make their KFC® Famous Bowl?!


  

2017-10-21 [Sideways]: It’s a great big pigslop bowl of sadness
2017-10-21 [Mortified Penguin]: Thank you for endorsing Bob's® Great Big Pigslop Bowl of Sadness, but we're not nearly as good as KFC and we use pigslop instead of chicken.
2017-10-21 [Nuktae-tal]: and sadness instead of potatoes!
2017-10-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: And wood shavings instead of cheese!
2017-10-22 [Sagacious Turkey]: *whittles a wooden shiv in case of Misty attacks*


*on second thought, goes ahead and whittles a glass shiv too... just in case*
2017-10-22 Not a Clone: Why does the logo for Elfpack look like a lizard? More importantly, is it a lizard I can meet?
2017-10-22 Really!: I'd ask over there, but I prefer to contribute to the one that's actually doing well!
2017-10-22 [Sideways]: Hey, Mort... what’s “Fiscal” mean? I’ve never heard of that word before.
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: How should I know? Do I look like a botanist to you?!
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: As for Elfpack's lizard... do I look like a botanist to you?!
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *storms off into his greenhouse to investigate the pH levels in his potted cabbage plants*


A pH of 1.5?! I wish I was a botanist, so I could know if that's good or not... *sighs and continues pouring acid on his plants*
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Oh yeah, and I always forget about Cathug's diner:


http://cathug.heddate.com/wiki.html?name=bob%27s%20diner



http://linkmeet.heddate.com/wiki.html?name=bob%27s%20diner
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: And I think there's one on elf12... and maybe musmakers and writersco, but probably not...
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: And baltbalt probably has one... probably not thunderskeep though... [Hedda] has too many failed sites that lead to too many failed diners...
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: There's a http://plant.heddate.com ?! Why would that site get shelved?! Now where am I supposed to do all my botany?!
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-22 [Mortified Penguin]: I would open new diners on these fancy, new websites I've heard of like Reddit and MySpace and Friendster, but outside of Heddate sites, it would just seem weird and autistic. And Reddit is autistic enough as is.
2017-10-23 [Nuktae-tal]: Amen!
2017-10-23 [Yuriona]:   


This does not exist in Canadian KFCs. (They don't carry corn either).
What we do have however, is KFC Popcorn poutine:


  

2017-10-24 It's Raining: You don't need those lame, new sites. As long as you keep those sergal pics around, you'll get plenty of occasional traffic!
2017-10-24 [Nuktae-tal]: What is poutine?!
2017-10-24 [Yuriona]: Poutine is basically fries with cheese curds smothered in gravy. Its yummy. :)
2017-10-27 [Nuktae-tal]: It doesn't sound yummy... I guess I'm too American to understand?
2017-10-27 [ancienteye]: Sounds yummy to me. :o
2017-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I always thought KFC gravy would make for some good poutine.
2017-10-27 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Cheese curds are not yummy...
2017-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: ALL CHEESE IS YUMMY.
2017-10-28 [Mortified Penguin]: #allcheesematters
2017-10-29 [Mortified Penguin]: #exceptblackcheese
2017-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: Yuriona hasn't commented in a few days?! This must mean she wants me to spam more...
2017-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]: *heads down to the basement to get the flyers and his advertising pistol*


  

2017-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-30 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-10-31 Fortified Sanguin: Don't make me!
2017-10-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Make a username already, so I can hack it and find out which letter agency you work for!


  

2017-11-01 But, Anonymity...: Gah! M-Maybe after I sign up for LD5.


I guess it's only fair... You've already proven good taste in lizard and sergal pics.
2017-11-01 Fortified Sanguin: Oh, but then I won't get capcha fortunes! This one's SC, which might mean Sim City! Haven't touched that game for awhile...
2017-11-01 I don't feel like logging in: But without a proper account, you can't see all the other hilarious stuff I do around here! I'm pretty sure you can at least go to [Maze of Guile@wiki] though. And [chess tournament@wiki]. And [some unfinished comics@wiki]. And whatever other nonsense I've made.
2017-11-01 hmm?!: Why aren't those wiki links working?!
2017-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm... they appear to work just fine once I've logged in.
2017-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU, CIA furfag without an account, are any of these links usable?


Mort's Member of the Month
The Unofficial Elftown News
I can't think of a third wiki
2017-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure you can't make it all the way through the key under the mat without an account. Not that anyone with an account ever did (other than [Nioniel]).
2017-11-01 yepyepyep: I'd prefer you call me scalefag. And yes, your links work fine. Even the third wiki that you can't think of.
2017-11-01 90s!: Also, pfft, you called Skyrim old near the end of 2013. I'm still playing MediEvil!
2017-11-01 [Mortified Penguin]: But did you ever play Splinter Cell: Pandora Tomorrow?! Apparently nobody on this site has.
2017-11-02 Tom: Oops. I never played anything Splinter Cell. I've been told I should have, though.
2017-11-02 [Nuktae-tal]: Wow... I leave for a few days and you all become cool. I see how it is now!
2017-11-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Psssh, nothin personnel, kid, but I've always been cool. *tips his fedora suavely and puts on a totally bitchin' pair of sunglasses*


*tries to cooly moonwalk out the door, but trips over an extension cord and crashes through the window*
2017-11-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Heh... heh heh... *comes crawling back in the door*... bet you thought that was an accident... but in reality it was actually a really nifty trick to... to illustrate just how cool I- *slips on some blood trying to stand back up and smashes his head on the side of a table*


*dies forever*
2017-11-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: That wasn't cool at all. You know what's really cool? *tips accounting glasses* Financial responsibility.


*all the women in the diner swoon (and also [Stephen]) and start begging to do sex to me*


GET OFF, WHORES, I'M DOING MATH! *shoves several skanks to the floor and goes back to inputting formulas in his abacus*
2017-11-04 That Blue Gang From III: "Somebody call a medic!"
2017-11-04 [Yuriona]: Does Medical Venturer count? I do have my standard first aid certification.   
2017-11-04 [Mortified Penguin]: I would help, but I could only get my second aid certification. All I'm qualified to do is fix body bag zippers.


*shrugs and remains dead forever*
2017-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm a doctor!


*tries to rush over to one of the whores who sprained an ankle, but trips over Mort's corpse*


Damn it, someone put that meatloaf in the freezer already, this is an operating room! Now let's get that appendix out.


*starts violently sawing into the whore's neck with a hatchet*
2017-11-04 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-11-04 [Sideways]: What is this, a thread for Glow in the Dark CIA niggers?
2017-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: Do I look CIA to you, fellow Elftowner?


  

2017-11-05 [Sagacious Turkey]: DO I?! *speaks into his collar*
2017-11-05 [Nuktae-tal]: Wow... now we are into war... K I dig it! * uses spoon to dig hole*
2017-11-05 [Mortified Penguin]: HEY. That comment had been double posted, but the second seems to have been removed. THAT DOESN'T HELP INCREASE THE COMMENT AVERAGE! *slaps Stephen*
2017-11-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: WHERE'S MY SPOON?! MY CEREAL IS GETTING SOGGY.
2017-11-06 [Sagacious Turkey]: Oh wait, this is oatmeal... nevermind. *starts eating it with his hands*
2017-11-06 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-07 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-10 [Nuktae-tal]: sorry for the double post! didn't meant to... cause this?
2017-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU SHOULD BE SORRY! Why wasn't it a triple post?!
2017-11-11 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-12 [Nuktae-tal]: yes... because Fuck that's why
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: *SMASHES IN THE ROTTING SALOON DOOR AND KNOCKS ONE OFF ITS HINGES* I've been looking for you fucks for more than THREE YEARS... Now that I've got you right where I- Oh my gaahd! I was number 21 in the 75 top commenters list!! *feels an embarrassingly large swelling of his pride - or his maybe pancreas*
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: You know, I thought for YEARS that Mortified Penguin and Sagacious Turkey were the same person.
2017-11-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: Personally, I'm still not convinced they aren't... *eats ramen*...


Wait, I mean- *does turkey things*
2017-11-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: That top commenter list is from 2014!
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: Shut up! Will you not let me have anything in this world?!
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: No! Pay your tab! *eats turkey*


Wait, I mean- *does ramen things*
2017-11-14 [Yuriona]:   
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't you make that hideous face at me!
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: Oh, and one more thing before I leave. I am ABSOLUTELY DISGUSTED by the racist memes certain lynchers- er, I mean lunchers, have been posting. All you racists really need to think about what you've done here... Oh, and I found something on the floor, anyone drop this?
  

2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Not cool, man. You know I'm black.
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: Why are you blaming me?! I just FOUND it here!
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Your stereotypes hurt us all... *sadly takes a swig of grape soda, pulls out his Hi-Point, and starts robbing customers as a tear rolls down his ashy cheek*
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: YOU DID THIS! *smashes an old lady over the head with a brick and runs off with her purse*
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: Hey, swastikas don't paint themselves on mixed race dormitory walls! We all gotta do our parts! *quietly declines do to do those parts*
2017-11-14 [Sagacious Turkey]: I agree, fellow white person. Racism is disgusting. *tips his yarmulke to you and heads back out with his spray paint*


2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: MY YARDMILK!


Oh wait, there it is in the yard. Nevermind.
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: Mort is such a smart goy! Everyone should drink plenty of kosher yardmilk.
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't touch my yardmilk. You can have some of the soy milk in the fridge, it'll help you grow big and strong. Just ask Tiny Tim!


*you can't ask Tiny Tim, because he is no longer with us*


*last I saw him, he was in upstate New York, pulling all kinds of sweet tang and winning muscle building contests*
2017-11-14 [Nuktae-tal]: *flexs muscles* boy these dead people sure are built! *tosses the grandmotherly corpse aside.*
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: This is a prestigious, 5-star restaurant. Please, show some class. *puts a suit jacket on the corpse*
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: So, what exactly has been happening on ET for the last 1000 days? Does anyone come here for reasons besides Bob's Diner?


*Builds bigger building for Bob's out of built bodies from the Better Business Bureau*
2017-11-14 [Imperator]: That looks like a Magneto tittie twister. Wait, it's blushing?...
2017-11-14 [Yuriona]: Bob's Diner and nostalgia. Lots of nostalgia...
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Sunrose and Silverfire left forever. Stephen probably died. And now there's pretty much only Yuriona left and the guard forums are boring, because there's nobody to gossip about me anymore.
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: The weekly member has been the same since 2014, but luckily someone came up with Mort's Member of the Month to replace it.
2017-11-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Pay no attention to the fact that there have been no new interviews for a year or two.
2017-11-15 [Imperator]: How much does it cost to keep this thing running? With so few people I'm genuinely amazed that it still exists. Other websites with actual visitors can barely keep their servers up, what voodoo magick is ET conjuring?
2017-11-15 [Imperator]: And when it says that [Sunrose] is "banned", what does that actually mean in her case?
2017-11-15 [Yuriona]: Banned is banned. I think she requested it so she would never be able to log in again. *shrugs* I don't really remember the story now.
2017-11-15 Still No Account: What the heck, one of the 0¢ ads looked interesting and actually lead to a cool place!
2017-11-15 No Account Still: ... So, uh, that's how it stays up. Actual cool ads?
2017-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: If I remember correctly, there was a Christmas contest that was poorly advertised and nobody entered except me. Rather than let me win first place in every category, Sunny decided to extend the deadline to let other people enter. I complained and demanded all the badges I had earned and Sunny and Silvie apparently didn't take too kindly to that. So Sunny got Silvie to just ban her and then Silvie left shortly thereafter. Meanwhile, I'm still waiting on tons of first place badges.
2017-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: Personally, I find my various Elftown sassings to be hilarious, but the guards always seem to disagree for whatever reason. As for those free ads, they all suck and are lame! Those should be my free ads! But I can't remember my Project Wonderful password and I don't feel like making a new account and new ads...
2017-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: But at least I finally managed to Delete Sunrose Now! Now there's only one guard left standing in my way... *glares at Yuri*
2017-11-15 [Yuriona]: Yeah... good luck with that. :3
2017-11-15 [Mortified Penguin]: But seriously though, I need to get into the kitchen. Please stop standing in my way.
2017-11-16 [Imperator]: I'm unsurprised that the counter-culture soul of ET all those years ago is a guy posting dank memes today. All the people who were running ET more or less fit into today's "snowflake" category I'd say. Could that be why they hated Mort?
2017-11-16 [Imperator]: I can't imagine 0 cent ads bringing in much revenue... Maybe Hedda just got rich in the meantime and has the server's bills on auto-pay?
2017-11-16 [Imperator]: Only now am I beginning to realize what a haven of cultural cancer this place was! Wow! It all makes sense now...
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: The guards hated me for expressing my opinions. That and they were all jealous women who lusted after me, but knew they could never have me, because my heart belonged to my career in paleontology. Back me up here, Yuri! And don't bring up any of your crazy conspiracies about me hacking the site repeatedly, that's ridiculous. But the guard forums are boring now though. :(
2017-11-16 [Imperator]: I can't imagine that there is anything at all to talk about in the guard forums... All the drama is so quaint looking back on it. Everyone was SO touchy about commenting on "official" pages and cluttering it all up! Haha! It seemed like most people's primary concern was shutting down their pages' comment sections (eerily forecasting what was to come to whole news websites and Reddit...) I guess they eventually achieved their goal though cuz everyone died!!
2017-11-16 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: And they still try to suppress my freedom of speech to this day! I have every right to spam Bob's Diner 60 times a day, this is AMERICA, not some third world shithole like Sweden! *spits on [Elftron]*
2017-11-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *starts lining up for free helicopter rides*


This is gonna be so much fun!
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-16 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-16 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-16 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-16 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey, you can't be racist here. Yuriona is a black man and probably doesn't appreciate your shenanigans.
2017-11-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Plus, bigotry is so childish anyway and we really should all just get alon- LISTEN HERE, YOU GODDAMN KIKE, IF YOU DON'T STOP TRIMMING DOWN THE EDGES OF THESE PENNIES, I'M GOING TO START TAKING BITES OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN BAGELS, YOU HEAR ME?! *violently throws a handful of jagged pennies at the greasy Jew*


*he mutters in Hebrew and slinks back into the shadows*
2017-11-17 [Yuriona]: I'm a black man? O_o
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: I mean, I assumed.
2017-11-17 [Yuriona]: I'm not a black man and no, I probably don't appreciate the shenanigans.
2017-11-17 Library: Wait, what did you say about Gary Johnson? That man climbs mountains!
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That sounds like something a black man would say!
2017-11-17 [Nuktae-tal]: That sounds suspiciously like Sherpa intolerance sir!
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: Don't assume xer race!! Maybe she- I mean, zhe identifies as a transsexual gay black man!! You're so misogynist- I mean, transracist/transgenderist/anti-degenist! AND I BET YOU DRINK YARDMILK.
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: Did I hear that right? Someone doesn't like shenanigans? Oh, god, now HE is going to come in here. He always shows up whenever people start talking about feeli-
  

I hate that guy.
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: *sits down at a three-legged table to drink some yardmilk*
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: *scoffs into his fresh squeezed cellarmilk and relaxes at his 9-legged table*
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: Always have to outdo me by threes, eh? Well bunkermilk is three times cellarmilk! *pours chunks of bunkermilk into glass, shattering it*
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Now you're just making up nonsense.
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, I'm taking that glass out of your paycheck.
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: But I don't work here...
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: Also, you need to start showing up for work. I'm tired of always having to just mail your check to you at your condo. You could at least come pick it up every now and then.
2017-11-17 [Mortified Penguin]: YES YOU DO. You're the best damn fry cook we've ever had. I only wish we had a fryer.
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: But you stole my car and I live 40 miles away...
2017-11-17 [Imperator]: I have a morning ritual I go through before beginning the workday which is why I'm such a great fry cook:
  

2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I usually just crawl out of the oven, sacrifice a quick chicken to Moloch, and smoke my breakfast Crack Joint™.
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *cracks open a finely aged, ten year old bottle of Shrimpola Cola™*


  

2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Why are these sideways?!


  

2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: This thing used to have an embryo growing inside it, but I think it dissolved a few years ago...
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: The unfunny nutritional information.   
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: If I recall correctly, the ingredients were a bunch of hot sauce and tons of salt watered down with water. And also possibly some vinegar.
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: That's a real, totally unedited picture of both Mort and Turkey on the label! Absolutely unedited!
2017-11-18 [Imperator]: What?! You crawl BACK OUT of the oven?! You filthy oven-dodger!
2017-11-18 [Imperator]: But seriously, I REALLY thought Mort and Turkey were the same person...
2017-11-18 [Imperator]: But BUT the real question is why someone has a book by Bill Clinton AND the second really real question is why they apparently paid for a copy of that propaganda cover-up 9/11 Commission Report when they SHOULD HAVE bought Operation Dark Heart by Lt. Col. Anthony Shaffer...
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't judge my thrift store shelf. I still need to find a copy of the Warren Commission Report too, I hear it's totally legit.
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *some Israeli art students start working on a project on an upper floor of the diner*
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Has anyone seen Larry from corporate today? He usually has breakfast with me at the top of the diner, but he didn't show up to work this morning. Also, his son and daughter didn't show either. And several hundred Jewish employees. Oh well, I'm sure it's just a coincidence. *heads up to the top floor of the diner*
2017-11-18 [Yuriona]: I must say that bottle of soda looks more like a bottle of old urine.
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: It was supposed to be a spicy shrimp flavored soda. But we had no way to carbonate it. Plus, we had no shrimp. Only one person was lucky enough to get to taste it. Lionel was never really the same after that...
2017-11-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: That carpet was never really the same either.
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: Too soon... :(
2017-11-18 [Imperator]: You could have just tossed a rug over the spot. No one would have questioned it.
2017-11-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure it was easier to just burn the entire house down.
2017-11-18 [Imperator]: No wonder you are regularly sued for insurance fraud!
2017-11-18 [Yuriona]: It does explain a few things. It must have been the only way to keep the carpet quiet - blackmail money.
2017-11-19 [Imperator]: Lots of people walked across that carpet and the carpet muffled their footsteps, saving up the sound waves, and then planned to release all that pent-up noise in one massive blast that would destroy Bob's Diner!!
2017-11-19 [Mortified Penguin]: This is why I regularly mow my carpets.
2017-11-20 [Nuktae-tal]: I just give mine a good lather. It releases the stress they built up you k ow?
2017-11-20 [Imperator]: Giving carpets a good "leather" is much more exciting. Releases more than just stress.
2017-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]: I prefer a nice waxed hardwood anyway.
2017-11-20 [Mortified Penguin]:   
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2017-11-21 [Yuriona]: No Gundams for USA! I want one... >_>
2017-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: We need to be funding these two Gundams (some of the greatest Gundams ever conceived):


  
  

2017-11-21 [Imperator]:   
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2017-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]:   
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2017-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-21 [Mortified Penguin]: I miss Tay. :(
2017-11-21 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-21 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-21 [Imperator]:   
2017-11-21 [Imperator]: I <3 Anti-Semitic Tuesdays.
2017-11-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Anti-Semitic Tuesdays are great and all, but they really do a number on our oven. *pats ol' Sparky on the eye*
2017-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Ew, Yuri is Canadian.
2017-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Trudeau, pictured with two average Canadian women:   
2017-11-23 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-23 [Yuriona]: Take off eh! You hoser.


And please, kill more Canadian geese. They're a pain in the ass the dirty pests.
2017-11-23 [Imperator]: That picture is THE greatest rebuttal of Canada I have EVER seen.
2017-11-23 [Imperator]: Why can't I press ctrl+enter in order to send messages? Who designed this Diner??!
2017-11-23 [Imperator]: Most of us down here in the ol' 48 are preeetty sure Trudeau's papi was Fidel Castro.
2017-11-23 [Imperator]: Considering all the turkeys on this page, I think a "Happy Thanksgiving" is in order:
  

2017-11-23 [Nuktae-tal]: HAppy kill everybody with disease day!!! in the USA of course. though technically it all started from the U.K.
2017-11-23 [Imperator]: Oh, are you talking about small pox? Funny thing that. The reason the indians caught it was because they raided a White hospital, scalped the sick, and stole their blankets. Karma is a bitch, eh?
2017-11-23 [Yuriona]: *shrugs* Trudeau very could be I suppose. I don't really follow politics all that closely. Its mostly all bullshit and posturing anyways.


And that Eagle is sitting on a Canada Goose. How insulting. *sarcasm* Besides, that bird isn't our national animal. Try again. :P
2017-11-23 [Imperator]: Canada has a national bird? I thought it was just trees 'n stuff.
2017-11-24 [Yuriona]: And snow! Don't forget the snow!
2017-11-24 [Imperator]: I thought we took care of that crap with global warming?!
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure Canada's national bird is a leaf.
2017-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Roll Tide! I'm voting for Roy Moore TWICE!


  

2017-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]: Canada's okay, I went to see a fight there once, but a hockey game broke out. To hell with Canadian Geese though, their constant shitting on the greens has ruined my short game!
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-24 [Alexi Ice]: Obligatory comment*


2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: *shoves Alexi down some stairs for interrupting my annoying picture posting*
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! Don't damage my stairs!! *starts kicking Alexi*
2017-11-24 [Mortified Penguin]: EW!!! Stop getting so much blood on my shoes!! *kicks harder*
2017-11-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-11-24 [Imperator]: Sucking a swan's beak? What?
That dead girl looks like Bane. But I don't understand the meme. I'm assuming that there is some discrepancy which proves the story is bullshit?
2017-11-24 [Imperator]:
THE GOYIM KNOW.
2017-11-24 [Imperator]: *The Goyim begin kicking Alexi as well because they realize she is Shabbos goy*
2017-11-25 [Sagacious Turkey]: *shrugs and starts kicking Alexi as well*
2017-11-25 [Mrs. No_One]:   
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2017-11-25 [Mrs. No_One]:   
2017-11-25 [Mrs. No_One]: What time did the man go to the dentist? Tooth hurt-y.
________________


Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers? They say he made a mint.
________________


A ham sandwich walks into a bar and orders a beer. Bartender says, 'Sorry we don't serve food here.'
________________


Cashier at the grocery store: Would you like the milk in a bag?
Me: No, just leave it in the carton.
________________


Why do chicken coops only have two doors? Because if they had four, they would be chicken sedans
________________


Me: 'Dad, make me a sandwich!'
Dad: 'Poof, You’re a sandwich!
________________


Why did the Clydesdale give the pony a glass of water? Because he was a little horse.
________________


Me: 'Hey, I was thinking…'
My dad: 'I thought I smelled something burning.'
________________


How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!
________________


Dad: *driving past a graveyard* 'Do you know why I can’t be buried there?'
Me: 'Why not?'
Dad: 'Because I’m not dead yet!
________________


Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was a salted.
________________


I used to have a job at a calendar factory but I got the sack because I took a couple of days off.
________________


How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it.
________________


Fast food worker: 'Any condiments?'
Me: 'Compliments? You look very nice today!
________________


A woman is on trial for beating her husband to death with his guitar collection. Judge says, 'First offender?' She says, 'No, first a Gibson! Then a Fender!'
________________


I had a dream that I was a muffler last night. I woke up exhausted!
________________


How do you tell the difference between a frog and a horny toad? A frog says, 'Ribbit, ribbit' and a horny toad says, 'Rub it, rub it.'
________________


What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? A ba-na-na-na.
________________


Did you hear the news? FedEx and UPS are merging. They’re going to go by the name Fed-Up from now on.
2017-11-25 [Mrs. No_One]: Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
What are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault


They won't take you to the vet
You're obviously not their favorite pet
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault


You may not be a bed of roses
You're not friend to those with noses
I'll miss you before we're done
Or the world will smell as one


Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
What are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat
It's not your fault


(Phoebe) Oh are we done?


One, two, what's that smell?
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
What are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat
You're getting fat


I think that I'm gonna be sick
It's your ears, and nose and pick
Part of it, tempt me


One, two, what's that smell?
All the dogs in the neighborhood
Are saying this for your own good
What, you're fat, so you can't run
No fun, I bet, No fun


Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
Porno makes you eat like that
I saw you in the shopping mall
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault,


Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault
Smelly Cat, Smelly Cat,
It's not your fault


We know what was in your food
They say it might affect your mood
You smell like something dead (3x)
One, two, what's that smell?


(Phoebe)Yeah, that's not the song
2017-11-25 [Mrs. No_One]: Soft kitty, warm kitty


Little ball of fur


Happy kitty, sleepy kitty


Purr, purr, purr
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: It absolutely is that damn cat's fault, it won't stop eating all these corpses!


*gestures at the mangy cat chewing on the face of Chandler's corpse*
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Your memes are a little too vulgar and offensive for my taste, No_One. I'm disgusted you would sexualize a sponge like that. *shakes head disapprovingly*


Come on, baby, let's get out of this sickening den of deplorables! *grabs a hand towel and storms into the ladies' room*
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Hold on, let me see if there are any good, wholesome memes on my phone...
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: There we go, those are fresh out of my meme garden. Anyway, back to work... *grabs a rocket launcher off the weapon rack and heads outside to sure up the borders of Greater Bob's Diner*


*launches a rocket into a neighboring hospital full of insurgents and/or sick children*


THE PROPHECY MUST BE FULFILLED!! *fires wildly into a screaming crowd*


*quickly hides the launcher behind his back as a passing police officer slows down and looks out his window*


*nods nonchalantly at him and he drives off into the ghetto to try out his new pistol*
2017-11-25 [Imperator]: Is it Tuesday already?!


  

2017-11-25 [Mortified Penguin]: It's always Tuesday here! Except when it's Wednesday, which will now be pushed back until Friday.
2017-11-26 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-11-26 [Sagacious Turkey]: *nervously takes down orders with a 14.9cm long pencil*


*the British police glare angrily and start unsheathing their beating sticks*


To hell with this. *just bites off his finger and writes in blood*


*the British police nod approvingly and go back to eating their crumpets and porridge*
2017-11-27 Pied Crow: I'm late, but don't judge people for sucking bird beaks!
2017-11-27 [Sagacious Turkey]: But what of platypus beaks?
2017-11-27 [Mrs. No_One]:   
2017-11-27 [Mrs. No_One]:   
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2017-11-27 [Mrs. No_One]:   
2017-11-27 [Nuktae-tal]: Nice
2017-11-28 [~Crimson Angel~]: Uh... What has become of this place? *kicks a small child wanting more porridge and mumbles something about Oliver Twist*
2017-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Hey! We don't abuse Dickens' characters around here! *angrily kicks Tiny Tim in the ribs*
2017-11-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *Nicholas Nickleby glances around nervously*
2017-11-28 [Nuktae-tal]: *plays with Turkey carcas from thanksgiving in America*
2017-11-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: PAPA, NNOOOO!!
2017-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: There, now my precious status reports are back.
2017-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: Here are the current comment scores for this friscal year so far (from September 1st up until the previous comment):


[Mortified Penguin] 188
[Imperator] 54
[Nuktae-tal] 53
[Mrs. No_One] 43
[Sagacious Turkey] 39
No name guy 28
[ancienteye] 20
[Yuriona] 19
[Sideways] 10
[Sheamus Finn] 8
[Avoral] 1
[Delta Operator] 1
[General] 1
[Hedda] 1
[Emily June] 1
[rBob'sDine] 1
[erBob'sDin] 1
[nerBob'sDi] 1
[inerBob'sD] 1
[DinerBob's] 1
[sDinerBob'] 1
['sDinerBob] 1
[b'sDinerBo] 1
[ob'sDinerB] 1
[Bob'sDiner] 1
[Alexi Ice] 1
[~Crimson Angel~] 1
[nokaredes] -1!!
2017-11-28 [Mortified Penguin]: That's 479 total comments over 89 days at an average of 5.3820224719101123595505617977528 comments per day. At this pace, this should be the most productive friscal year since 10/11. All thanks to extreme spamming and violent threats.
2017-11-28 Pied Crow: I'd complain about the overflow of images, but one of them had dragons.
2017-11-29 [Sheamus Finn]: Wait which year 10 or / or 11?
2017-11-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: /.
2017-11-29 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *some valued regulars skitter in and start eating dinner*


  

2017-12-01 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-01 [Nuktae-tal]: Sempai!?
2017-12-01 [Mortified Penguin]: TAKE YOUR PROBE.
2017-12-02 [Nuktae-tal]: All the probing for me?! Oh sempai!!!
2017-12-03 Pied Crow: One of the ads tells me not to read the comments. Should I stop reading this?
2017-12-03 [Nuktae-tal]: Read everything! Pork the police!
2017-12-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *starts making sammiches*


  

2017-12-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *tosses the nugget in the deep fryer*


  

2017-12-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: *throws the tomato slices, entire smoldering chicken, and a single Rit cracker into the blender and pours the delicious resulting liquid directly onto the laps of the patrons at table #3*


  

2017-12-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Enjoy your chicken sandwiches, you two!


*sets the mood for their date by romantically playing his accordion*


  



*they both sob and struggle futily against their chains*
2017-12-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't forget their order of fries.


  

2017-12-04 公式代理人: Hi, Nuktae-Tal! I just thought I'd let you know that I think you'd look great as a 500 meter tall monster. Have you ever tried to audition at Toho? i bet you could be the star of the next big tokusatsu! If you want an appointment, or maybe something else, call me!
2017-12-04 [Sagacious Turkey]: *stands in an open doorway, in his sexiest Godzilla outfit, looking crestfallen*
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Stop not commenting enough and forcing me to post stupid pictures! This is a DINER, not an IMAGEBOARD! *slaps the Captcha right off the wall*
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Now, let's see what garbage I have today...
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Here,
we see Misty on the way to her family reunion.


  

2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]: And here,
she has finally been reunited with her kin.


  

2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-06 [~Crimson Angel~]: That mayonnaise is made with olive oil, I only eat regular mayonnaise, and my family members are hippos, not cows.
2017-12-06 Pied Crow: Do you expect me to talk?
2017-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't make fun of your family like that, Misty. That's pretty rude.


And that Kraft jar mayo sucks, regardless of type.
2017-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: And YES, DAMMIT. I EXPECT YOU TO TALK. *slams his fist down on the desk*


*tilts the desk lamp where it's pointed right at Pied Crow's face*


Where were you on the night of the 12th, HUH?! Down at the old mill?! Why did you do it?! For the fame? For the gold? TALK, DAMN YOU!
2017-12-06 Pied Crow: ... Now that's just unfair. I can't remember what I did two weeks ago, let alone a month.
2017-12-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Not that 12th, the other 12th! STOP FUCKING WITH ME AND ANSWER THE QUESTION!! GIVEN THAT THE ONTOLOGICAL NECESSITY OF EXISTENCE MUST BE DEFINED AS ESSENTIAL TO BEING ITSELF, HOW CAN SUCH GROUNDING OF THE EPISTEMOLOGICAL FUNCTION BE ARTICULATED WITHOUT ASSUMING AN A PRIORI AND UNWARRANTED EXISTENTIAL PREMISE?! WELL?!! ANSWER ME, DAMN IT!! *angrily grabs Tiny Tim's crutch and brutally impales him with it*
2017-12-07 [Nuktae-tal]: I tried to talk and Elftown wouldn't let me from my PHONE! *throws television through diner window* Stupid PHONE!
2017-12-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Kraft Mayo is the best, if you don't like it you're a peasant, Kraft Mayo is for royalty.
2017-12-07 Pied Crow: Oh. Because I left my bazooka at home. Sheesh... Give me a break, here.
2017-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: Kraft Mayo is the worst, you harlot! Heinz is clearly the superior mayo! And don't get me started on Hidden Valley's ranch either... I would make a joke about firebombing Hidden Valley, but I'm on enough watch lists as it is. But that shit is NOT RANCH. IT'S GARBAGE. GARBAGE! *throws the television at Poop Crow*
2017-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats ramen with mayonnaise and butter in it*
2017-12-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *pours ramen into popsicle molds and puts them in the freezer for later*
2017-12-07 [Sagacious Turkey]: I'm pretty sure Hellman's and Duke's mayonnaises are probably the best. But I only eat packets of mayo I steal from restaurants, not that jar nonsense.


*inconspicuously pockets 27 packs of mayo from the bin on the counter and quickly sprints out the front door*
2017-12-07 Pizza Pied Crow: A television sounds lethal for a corvid...
2017-12-08 [~Crimson Angel~]: *eats Kraft mayonnaise on my salad and ranch on my sandwich*
2017-12-08 [Mortified Penguin]: No, you're a corvette! *shoves Misty's sandwich*


*eats a delicious ramen popsicle*
2017-12-09 Pied Crow: Excuse me? A corvette is what I want to hug!


Er, I mean, make out with.


What? The tag buttons showed up and I wanted to utilize 'em! Yeah, that's it...
2017-12-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *sits in his tree and casually chews some eucalyptus*
2017-12-10 [Mortified Penguin]: NO OUTSIDE FOOD OR DRINK!


  

2017-12-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: To hell with this, I'm going to McDonald's to try their new halal eucalyptus nuggets! *grabs [Pillowthief]'s car keys and storms out*


  



*immediately crashes into a ditch, not so much because I am a koala, but because I am black out drunk*
2017-12-10 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-12-11 Pied Crow: ... Huh.


Anyway, you probably don't want me anymore, but I'm ready to sign up here! Bring on the referral links I didn't use last time!
2017-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: Here's one or two:


http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=GTcjbHQR
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=w6eTAefC
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=sMP2FAbx
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=crWFtdnm
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=BDscFZR8
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=8DyYCGyg
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=YH4VHgT9
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=qjtj7s69
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=VMGS9K4H
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=mDGhij2C
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=2YErtfPs
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=tPtSXbej
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=Kvp4eVeC
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=W8s8CG77
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=SVjpesJg
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=PVZd2gLE
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=77ELje4R
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=jeDAJSMW
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=itM4Rt4m
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=LKTM9jmM
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=6azdNXrc
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=JzZSb8pq
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=GESJ2Ng9
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=cTWGH97h
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=ePVA6GAH
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=W2mpswvw
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=9KPbLZTk
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=jPEnCZND
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=7mM7NF4b
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=sDqLV86s
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=AetGZmHE
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=LQtYdtBq
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=rvXXGPtj
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=V9zvGYNz
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=hfLqQdcn
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=spkNxK2B
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=GFPRRHEw
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=WedrHLsd
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=9n6fyN42
http://www.elftown.com/i.html?code=SnXtdPTL
2017-12-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts back in*


  

2017-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: No more of that! *drop kicks the koala into the soup*
2017-12-11 [Sagacious Turkey]: Now I'm a marsoupial!


  



*screeches and crawls up the wall into the rafters*
2017-12-11 [Mortified Penguin]: *glares and points at the sign on the wall clearly stating, "NO VARMINTS! Except possums, but only as a salad topper."*
2017-12-11 [Yuriona]: What about the raccoons in the kitchen??
2017-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: What?! Damn coons! Git outta here! GIT!


*smacks a black family with a broom and they scurry off into the night*


Now what were you saying, Yuri? Something about turnips?
2017-12-12 [Pied Crow]: Sorry it took us a koala-while, but we did it. Were we supposed to take the sign-up seriously? Because we took the sign-up seriously.
2017-12-12 [Mortified Penguin]: *slams down his stein of mead in contempt*


We are not a medieval establishment! We have all the latest technologies! *gestures at the broken cotton gin in the kitchen*


Now, if you don't mind, I must away to table nine to collect the bill. *grabs his flanged mace from the weapon rack, mounts his mighty stead, and charges the table (approximately $23.45)*
2017-12-12 [Yuriona]: yeah I knew that's where you were gonna go with that.


That's one big rat. O_o
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Well yeah, our slogan back in 2004 was, "Bob's Diner is the place for you, unless you're a monkey or a Jew!"


I have a certain rapport I'm expected to maintain here, I wouldn't want to alienate all our loyal fans by not being racist enough.


*sighs contentedly and smiles as he stares out at all the empty tables*
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: And you, Crow, go visit all the other wikis I own/have stolen. Like Maze of Guile, some unfinished comics, the key under the mat, anthro lovers, mort says stuff, and whatever else I own...
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...The Unofficial Elftown News, chess tournament, Mort's Member of the Month...
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: Apparently, I also own Adjective Bird... and beget, for whatever reason... strange... and like 1000 other wikis...
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: There's some weird stuff in my notes...
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: There's like 100 different wikis that start with "Bob's"...
2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: ...why have I owned anna nicole smith for 10 years?!
2017-12-13 [Pied Crow]: Oh, now I see why [Mortified Penguin] has so many wikis! His face looks like a wiki! How informational these seven year old comments can be!
2017-12-13 [Pied Crow]: Wait, Adjective Bird? From 2011?! But...I never realized I was crowkin until 2014!
2017-12-13 [~Crimson Angel~]:
@[Mortified Penguin]


  

2017-12-13 [Mortified Penguin]: EVERYONE CARES! *cobras start slithering out of Mort's face and attack Misty*
2017-12-13 [Sagacious Turkey]: Nothing ever slithers out of my face. :(
2017-12-13 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-12-14 [Pillowthief]: Fine! Fine! I here, jesu- Wait. This isnt Bob's Diner! Dammit Mort- that link lead me to the kitchen! Now Im indentured again. Great. Thanks. Where's that $20 you promised me?
2017-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, so that was another lie. Now, about those dishes... *points at the pile of vases in the sink*
2017-12-14 [Pillowthief]:   
2017-12-14 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-12-14 [dead~spirit]: O.o;
2017-12-14 [Mortified Penguin]: AND PUT A HAIRNET ON OVER THAT MASK OR I'M DOCKING YOUR PAY! Also, we can't afford to pay you. Hence, the shackles.


*sighs exasperatedly*


The shit I have to deal with around here...


*props his feet up on the register and sips his mojito from a vase*
2017-12-15 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-12-15 [Mortified Penguin]: But... you stabbed three people yesterday!
2017-12-16 [Nuktae-tal]: Only three this time?!
2017-12-16 [Nekko fox]: Speaking of which, we've got new meat for the stewloaf.


Or is it loafstew?


I never remember in this place.


And what terrible service, I haven't been threatened once.
2017-12-16 [~Crimson Angel~]:   
2017-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses the corpses of Tiny Tim, Micro Tim, and a Paco into the soupstewloaf*


*tosses the thermostat in as well*
2017-12-16 [Sagacious Turkey]: *emerges from inside the loafstewsoup with a thermostat lodged in his cranium and a Micro Tim jammed right in his gizzard*


I'm trying to bathe here, cut that out.


*glares and slowly sinks back into the stewloafsoup without breaking eye contact*
2017-12-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of black trannies...


  

2017-12-16 [Nuktae-tal]: I think you are beautiful dear!*tosses rotten possum into the stew loaf pot*
2017-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That's disgusting! Don't put salad topper in the soup! Now we have to start over.


*pulls the handle on the pot and flushes it all down the drain*
2017-12-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooo...!!


*spins around in circles, but doesn't actually go down the drain, since he's a full grown man in a turkey fursuit and that would be ridiculous*


*climbs out of the toilet and goes off to file his taxes responsibly*
2017-12-17 [Nuktae-tal]: *adds extra numbers for him on his taxes, and another dead possum for good measure*
2017-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-17 Not-Logged-In-Stephen: This is a comment.
2017-12-17 [Pied Crow]: Whoa, now, hold it there!


A turkey fursuit? Really? You disappoint me, that should be a feathersuit!




2017-12-17 [Pied Crow]: And where was that turkey suit when the Japanese executive was around? The tokusatsu industry needs more bird kaiju!
2017-12-17 [Mortified Penguin]: That does not count as a comment, Stephen, and you won't be getting your full $20!!


*hands Stephen $19.99, hands Nekko a roll of pennies and two used pinecones, and hands Pillowthief more dishes*
2017-12-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: It was a feathersuit, but I molted.
2017-12-17 [Sagacious Turkey]: Mothra was always my favorite bird kaiju, second only to the Megazord.
2017-12-17 [Nuktae-tal]: Ptyril from neopets for me!
2017-12-17 [Yuriona]: I would have to concur on Mothra. Very similar to the Mothman only bigger. :3
2017-12-18 [Pied Crow]: Eh?! What's up with you all? Clearly, Ra from the Age of Mythology is the best bird kaiju!
2017-12-18 [Nekko fox]: I happen to prefer the Piltdown man, myself.
2017-12-18 [Pied Crow]: What? Two of you were joking?
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't joke here. This isn't some Jim's Eatery nonsense, we take our kaiju seriously.


Besides, Thoth could beat up Ra any day.
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: There's way better crow reaction pics than penguin pics. :(
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: *flaps his mighty penguin wings and flies swiftly up into the stratosphere*
2017-12-18 [Nekko fox]:   
2017-12-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: There are literally no turkey memes or reaction images anywhere on the internet. Not even on www.turkeyreactionimages.gov .


*flaps his powerful turkey legs and quickly flies up into the ceiling fan*
2017-12-18 [Pied Crow]: Beat up? I was referring to those good looks.
2017-12-18 [Sagacious Turkey]: *several customers receive free helpings of fresh giblets*


*several other customers receive dysentery*
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-18 [Mortified Penguin]: I bet Ra gives a really good beakjob.
2017-12-18 [Pied Crow]: I wouldn't know. I only ever get his talons.
2017-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes stumbling in to work drunk*
2017-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *starts frying up some grease*
2017-12-20 [Nuktae-tal]: Hmmmm fried penguin!
2017-12-20 [Pied Crow]: Does someone need some Mepsi Pax?
2017-12-20 [Nekko fox]: Isn't that the Pepsi made in Paco?


*Shakes Paco and listens to the fizz...*


*adds him to the fried penguin for that truly authentic Mexican flavor*
2017-12-20 [Nuktae-tal]: Add ostrich egg for filler... also plastic bags.
2017-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't waste my good plastic bags on the customers! Just use those crusty old milk jugs over there.


*points at Yuriona's chest*
2017-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *tosses some COCK KKK brand sandwiches in the microwave and tosses the microwave in with the penguin and the foaming Paco in the skillet*


  

2017-12-20 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws the skillet into the soup and kicks the soup into the furnace, before finally violently hurling the furnace into the sun*


There, breakfast is cooking. Should be done in- *stares directly at the sun for several seconds through the new hole in the roof* -about five minutes.


*stumbles blindly back into his office to count some shekels*
2017-12-21 [Nuktae-tal]: Mmm smell that home cooking! *sniffing pack corpse*
2017-12-21 [Pied Crow]: ... Whoa. Nekko-tal and Nuktae fox aren't the same person? I mean, you can't blame me, they both have an N and a k!
2017-12-21 Holiday Cheer: hi
2017-12-21 [Mrs. No_One]:
To those who celebrate Hanukkah (December 12th - December 20th):
  

________________




To those who celebrate Yule (December 21st - January 1st):
  

________________




To those who celebrate Christmas (December 24th and 25th):
  

________________




To those who celebrate Kwanzaa (December 26th - January 1st):
  

________________




To those who celebrate Boxing Day (December 26th):
  

________________




No matter what you celebrate...
  

________________




And if you don't celebrate any holiday well then...
  

2017-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: There are 12 days of Christmas, not 2! It ends on January 5th! And why make Christmas third on the list?! If you want a war on Christmas, you got it, pal. KEEP THE JESUS IN CHRISTMA-... CHRI-...... JESUSMAS!!


*angrily grabs a rocket launcher off the weapon rack and fires it into the sun*


There, lunch is cooking. Should be done in- *stares directly at the sun for several seconds through the newest hole in the roof* -about five years.
2017-12-21 [Yuriona]: No twerking turkey for me. I don't want to know where that turkey has been. O_o
2017-12-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: Don't call me a turkey, you're the turkey, you JIVE TURKEY!


*shoves Yuriona into a nearby well*


And stop polluting the town's drinking water!
2017-12-21 [Mortified Penguin]: MY ARTESIAN WELL!!
2017-12-22 [~Crimson Angel~]: Twerking Turkey? All I see is Miley Cyrus smacking her ass.
2017-12-22 [Yuriona]: *is buoyed up be the natural pressure of the spring* I'm not polluting it! I don't have to pee yet... >_>
2017-12-22 [Nuktae-tal]: *finishes peeing in it.* yeah yuriona!
2017-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs and throws the well into the new furnace*


*drinks bottled water*


*eats bottled ramen*
2017-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: We're 150 comments away from 40,000 comments!
2017-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: That's almost 100,000 comments!
2017-12-22 [Yuriona]: *stays with the water* you only threw the well. :P Good thing. Might have put the furnace out.
2017-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Unless my math is wrong. But that's impossible, I have a math degree.


*points at a framed rejection letter from DeVry University on the wall*
2017-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: *transfers Yuri to a new fish tank, complete with tiny treasure chest*
2017-12-22 [Mortified Penguin]: You make nice with those goldfish in there, I'm not buying two separate tanks. *points at the piranhas*
2017-12-23 [Pied Crow]: Something seems...different about the wiki page today. Anghel! Did you add something new to the menu?
2017-12-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: I take this as a threat. Clearly, [Mrs. No_One] intends to harm me, leaving me with no choice but to attack preemptively.


*quick draws his sniper rifle and guns Misty down*


*takes a nap*
2017-12-23 [Nekko fox]: By all that is holy, Mort, what is happening here?


Oh...


*Rolls Misty's carcass out the door to be feasted on by the ants outside*


*Tis the season for giving*
2017-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *the ants only got you fruitcake and a Taco Bell gift card with $4.35 left on it*


*the spiders, however, knitted you a sweater*
2017-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: STOP STEALING MY YARN!


*slaps Spider-Man so hard he falls off his bar stool and lands on the ground*


*he crawls off to his web in my yarn cabinet*


Son of a... *grabs a can of spray and storms off to the yarn room*
2017-12-23 [~Crimson Angel~]: *sips on a pina colada* Who's this Misty person, I don't know her.
2017-12-23 [Mortified Penguin]: How should I know?! *harpoons Amebara*


*sips motor oil*
2017-12-23 [Yuriona]: *tries to hide necklace of piranha teeth* They gave them to me honest!
2017-12-24 [~Crimson Angel~]: What's an Amebara? *sips on the blood of the innocent*
2017-12-24 [Mortified Penguin]: It's this horrifying witch monster from Indian (dot, not feather) folklore that haunts toilets.


If you got that blood from the soda machine, it's not innocent. It's baby blood, sure, but they were extremely guilty of a number of heinous crimes against humanity. I had no choice but to put them down... *thinks of all that baby slobber on his ramen and shudders*


*sips from Yuriona's tank*
2017-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-12-24 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2017-12-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Whoop Jedi!!! Hot pants!!!! Skirts even tooAa
2017-12-27 [Wulf Skjaldr]: *yawns* Why is that carcass dancing instead of being roasted?
2017-12-27 [Mortified Penguin]: I could ask you the very same about your mother!!
2017-12-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Hey! My mother earns an honest days wage! Dishonestly!
2017-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: My mother is dead... dead tired of me making jokes about her untimely death! *sobs controllably*
2017-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2017-12-28 [Nekko fox]:   
2017-12-28 [Mortified Penguin]: NO SKELETONS ALLOWED!


*viciously rips Misty's skeletal system from her body*


Now stop lying around and clean up all this blood!


*throws a garden hoe at the pile that was once [~Crimson Anal~]*
2017-12-29 [Nuktae-tal]: I am in my skeleton help!!!!* flails desperately into the Harlem shake*
2017-12-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I remember back in the day when the Harlem Shake just meant heading down to the ghetto and slapping the shit out of a prostitute until she started having a seizure. Those were simpler times...


*stares longingly out the window, thinking of those beans*
2018-01-02 [Nuktae-tal]: I am going to ruin everything!!!
2018-01-02 [Pied Crow]: Why is this place so much more active than LD5? This was not how we had this planned out...!
2018-01-02 [Nuktae-tal]: Sorry I care not for lsd!
2018-01-02 [Pied Crow]: But LCD TVs are the future! Because they're brighter and cheaper...
2018-01-02 [Pied Crow]: Also, you should've made fun of my typo. That was a stupid typo!
2018-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *comes bursting in with a ton of ramen noodles and LSD strips hanging out of his mouth*


HAND OVER THE BEANS!


*pulls out a Swiss Army knife and flips up the can opener attachment, brandishing it threateningly*


AND DON'T PULL THAT SHIT WITH THE PEAS AGAIN, I'M NOT FALLING FOR IT!
2018-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Comment average is going down, gotta post nonsense again.
2018-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]:   
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2018-01-02 [Mortified Penguin]: There, that should keep the average up for a while.
2018-01-02 [Yuriona]: Where the hell do you find that shit anyways? O_o
2018-01-03 [Nuktae-tal]: Mort knows the dark side of the Ethernet. Where only the hilarious and mad goes.
2018-01-03 [Pied Crow]: That is a very dishonest practice, Mort. I'm disgusted at you, especially since I've now dictated that you know I'll speak up whenever someone mentions lizards or kaiju.
2018-01-03 [~Crimson Angel~]:
Waiting for [Mortified Penguin] to be a decent human being like;


  

2018-01-03 [Nuktae-tal]: My bones are showing! Have you no decency?!
2018-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: Why is that skeleton using two mice?! Also, his necktie seems a bit bony.
2018-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: *holds Mothra down and starts skinning the brisket*
2018-01-03 [Sagacious Turkey]: Dibs on the drumsticks!
2018-01-03 [Mortified Penguin]: You're thinking of butterflies. Moth leg meat down to the hoof is called chuck, not drumstick. Trust me, I'm one of those guys that butchers meat, a meateorologist or whatever they're called.


*goes back to sawing through a particularly thick moth bone, trying to get the hide off the thorax*
2018-01-04 [Pied Crow]: .......


Well, at least now it won't look like what it used to be...unlike seafood.
2018-01-04 [Mortified Penguin]: Our seafood here looks like Yuriona.


*continues sawing into the floorboards*


*keeps sawing his way out into traffic*
2018-01-04 [Nuktae-tal]: *sells tickets to the meat show*
2018-01-04 [Yuriona]: I am not seafood. I just look like it.
2018-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, yeah. Stop flapping your gills at me and flop back into your frying pan.
2018-01-05 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-01-06 [Nuktae-tal]: Lolololol trolololol!
2018-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *a gorilla bashes Necktie-troll with a stick*
2018-01-06 [Nuktae-tal]: Yay monkey! * does the monkey dance*
2018-01-06 [Pied Crow]: Oh, wait, gills? I like fish! They're cute.
2018-01-06 [Yuriona]: No. It isn't a non stick pan. I refuse.
2018-01-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Ugh, FINE! *takes the stick out of the pan and hands it to the gorilla*


*he begins twirling both sticks and doing amazing flips as he approaches Naktae-tul threatening*


*he becomes distracted by a diseased pigeon flying around and ends up masturbating and flinging poo at customers from behind the counter*


*the health inspector stares on in horror*
2018-01-07 [Nuktae-tal]: *licks the health inspector and throws feces at gorilla screaming* monkey!!!!
2018-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The way you hit that other gorilla was good.
2018-01-07 [Mortified Penguin]: *notices the health inspector scowling, his lunch completely covered in feces*


*rushes over and gently places a hairnet on some of the poo*


My apologies, sir, usually we lock the gorilla in the kitchen during health inspections, but it broke free. PACO! PEDRO! PUT THAT DISGUSTING BEAST BACK IN THE KITCHEN!


*they grab Misty and start dragging her away*


*the health inspector tips his hat and resumes eating his lunch*
2018-01-08 [Yuriona]: *hops out of the pan and slips into the sewer drain*
2018-01-08 [Pied Crow]: Hey, that Yuriona skipped the frying pan part!
2018-01-08 [Nuktae-tal]: Crow!!!!! *shoves crackers into Pied's beak hole.*
2018-01-09 [Pied Crow]: GRAACK-cawwphgaubbrlblblpppfffpffpffftttt!!!!!!


Kuh! You can just hand them to me, you know! I have opposable feathers!
2018-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: ROLL TIDE! *shoves Yuriona back into the well*


*curb stomps a bulldog*
2018-01-09 [Yuriona]: *falls in with a splash* Dammit! You stupid turkey! You're bold now With Thanksgiving and Christmas over.
2018-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]: You betcha.
2018-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2018-01-09 [Sagacious Turkey]:   
2018-01-10 [Nuktae-tal]: Gasp!!
2018-01-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: Anyway, back to work.


*puts on a mask and pulls out a gun*


*fires a couple rounds into the air*


WHERE ARE THE DIAMONDS?!


*takes a bowl of ramen hostage*
2018-01-10 [Pied Crow]: Turkey-bird, what do you think you're doing? This isn't Payday.
2018-01-10 [Nuktae-tal]: Payday!!! *makes it rain with watermelons being shot out of a canon*
2018-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Ramen, NNNOOOOOO!!


Listen, buddy, we don't want no trouble...


*opens the register and starts scooping piles of diamonds out of the diamond slot into a plastic Wal-Mart bag*
2018-01-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: GOOD. Also, can I get an order of cheese fries to go?


*hands over a huge wad of cash*
2018-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: WE DON'T NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS! *slaps the money out of your hand*


*dumps the order of cheese fries down into the diamond bag*


Thank you for eating at Bob's Diner, come again s-


Waaaiiiit a second, that large Turkey beak sticking out of that mask seems familiar...
2018-01-10 [Sagacious Turkey]: *takes off the mask and notices a large Turkey beak jutting out of the top*


Nah, it's just a generic beak. *puts his mask back on to hide his identity*


SAGACIOUS TURKEY AWAY! *fires off a few more rounds and casually strolls out the front door*
2018-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]: Since there's no way to ever know who that masked bandit that left a trail of turkey feathers is, those cheese fries are coming out of your paycheck! *stabs Paco with his Employee Discipline Machete*
2018-01-10 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-01-11 [Nuktae-tal]: *does ballet, by convulsing*
2018-01-11 [Pied Crow]: ... Is it bad I only just now noticed how many birds there are around here? A turkey, a penguin, a luzon bleeding heart...


And I...I swear, my own identity is a coincidence!
2018-01-11 [Nuktae-tal]: WHO ARE YOU?!?!?
2018-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: That's not a bleeding-heart. *snatches a pigeon out of midair and licks some ketchup off the breast feathers*


That's just our resident CIA/FBI spook, trying to gather intel for his Bob's Diner Threat Matrix. He claims to be a crow, but I've always suspected he may be some kind of owl. Or possibly a seagull.
2018-01-11 [Nuktae-tal]: So not a writing desk then?
2018-01-11 [Yuriona]: Nor a pelican?
2018-01-11 [Mortified Penguin]: NO, THOSE ARE RIDICULOUS SUGGESTIONS. He could be a flamingo though.
2018-01-12 [Sheamus Finn]: I swore he was a flying emu....
2018-01-12 [Pied Crow]: Please, please! Let us settle this once and for all...


CAAAAAWWWWWWW!!!!!!!!!
2018-01-12 [Yuriona]: Kite with throat cancer?
2018-01-12 [Nuktae-tal]: A bagpipe?!
2018-01-12 [Pied Crow]: ... Actually, "Kite with throat cancer," isn't too far off. How'd you know our moniker is Smoky?!
2018-01-13 [Yuriona]: I'm psychic seafood?   
2018-01-13 [Sheamus Finn]: Off tuned bat?
2018-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *flies [Pied Crow] near some power lines*
2018-01-14 [Nuktae-tal]: My power!!!
2018-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: *gets bored and let's the kite fly away*


*starts setting fires and playing around in open manholes*
2018-01-14 [Nuktae-tal]: *flushes alligators and baby clowns down the toilet unto the sewers.*
2018-01-14 [Pied Crow]: Hmmm, I'm not sure what's worse... You trying to spook me with electricity or you mixing up lets and let us.


*drifts away with my thoughts*
2018-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: I just go with whatever word the phone suggests. I love this piece of great technology!
2018-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of, I need to finish this fancy Elftown app I was working on:




  

2018-01-14 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-01-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a people too!!
2018-01-15 [Mortified Penguin]: We don't serve people here.
2018-01-15 [Nuktae-tal]: I mean... uuuhhh I'm a wolf!
2018-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Gray Wolf or Timber Wolf?!
2018-01-16 [Pied Crow]: What if it's Grey Wolf?
2018-01-16 [Mortified Penguin]: Wikipedia said it was 'gray'. Wikipedia wouldn't lie to me.
2018-01-16 [Pied Crow]: You should take into account every search result when fact checking! All 1,000,000 of them! It is the only way to maintain true accuracy!
2018-01-16 [Nuktae-tal]: I'm a red wolf?! Or black... might be purple I don't remember now
2018-01-18 [Pied Crow]: Speak carefully... Mort is well-informed...!
2018-01-18 [Nuktae-tal]: Moist what am i?!
2018-01-18 [Sheamus Finn]: a cake? Cause otherwise this might get X-rated fast.....
2018-01-18 [Nuktae-tal]: I don't see the tentacles yet so I think we are good.
2018-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: The fuck is a wolf?! *eats a handful of ramen*


*snorts some of the noodles up through his nostrils*


Where the hell is my crackpipe?! *scratches his teeth*
2018-01-18 [Mortified Penguin]: AAAAAAHHHHHH!! *rips off his suit, revealing several flailing tentacles and one that's just sort of dangling there unenthusiastically*
2018-01-19 [Nuktae-tal]: Oh god cover that thing will you?! There are children!
2018-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: *the unenthusiastic one suddenly perks up*
2018-01-19 [Pied Crow]: テンタクル？ 興味ないね… >_>
2018-01-19 [Nuktae-tal]: *offers blow up dolls of Mickey mouse and Minnie to tentacles.* whose some good tentacles you are!
2018-01-19 [Mortified Penguin]: あなたはなれます。


*the tentacles eat some ramen*
2018-01-20 [Pied Crow]: Too small for my tastes, Penguin. I need at least two hundred feet.


2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: But tentacles don't have feet. They do wear socks though. And have toes. And fingernails. Not toenails! Fingernails. Also toenails. On their feet.
2018-01-21 [Nuktae-tal]: I wish I had fingernails on my toes... that would be nice.
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: So do I. And so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us. *nods wisely as he gently strokes a crooning midget*
2018-01-21 [Pied Crow]: Huh, I was half-right about how you were gonna react to that. Looks like I don't quite have you pegged, Sir Penguin.
2018-01-21 [Pied Crow]: Ah, and that thing at the bottom says there are 40003 comments! What a nice, non-symbolic number.....
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: But did you see this coming...?!


*does nothing*


*makes no joke about pegging*


*eats ramen*


*pats himself on the back for posting yet another hilarious comment*


*secretly wipes all the blood on his hand off on himself*


Heh heh, sucker...
2018-01-21 [Sagacious Turkey]: *dunks a mop into the soup and starts mopping the floor*


*mops the potted plants as well*


*wrings the mop out in the soup, snaps it in half, and tosses both halves in the soup as well*


*washes his hands off in the soup*


That's enough work for this week. *takes $2000 out of the register and strolls out the door*
2018-01-21 [Mortified Penguin]: MY CARPET!! Do you have any idea how hard it is to get soup stains out of carpet?! Not very.


*takes $2.7 million out of the register and sets fire to the diner before dashing out the door*
2018-01-22 [Sheamus Finn]: *watches as Mortified Penguin rushes out the front and in the rear door of the diner*


"We all order down here...." says the clown at the counter


*hits clown with frying pan*
No, we don't have the money for that cameo silly clown....
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Don't hit Misty with my frying pan! I just washed that several years ago.
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: Now [Elftron] is claiming the number of comments is only 40002.
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-01-22 [Pied Crow]: You can't burn the diner down! Where else can I go to wait for backyard bread crumbs?!
2018-01-22 [Nuktae-tal]: We wouldn't waste good crumbs on you!! *throws worm and maggot filled bread out the back door*
2018-01-22 [Mortified Penguin]: MY GOURMET BREAD!
2018-01-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts back in and takes a seat at the bar*


Gallon of whiskey, please.


*hands the bartender a used napkin with "one dollur" written on it in crayon, but it promptly catches fire*


There seems to be more fire in here than usual.
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I hadn't really noticed. *smolders*
2018-01-23 [Pied Crow]: *dines on a worm-maggot sandwich*
2018-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: Me either *uses flame thrower to kill a small child unattended by it's parent.*
2018-01-23 [Infested_Zling]: *looks around blankly before taking a seat* something... edible, please
2018-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: *Smashes bread with hammer and chisel*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *throws the bread in the garbage disposal and starts slicing up the hammer*
2018-01-23 [Nuktae-tal]: My penis! *grabs salami and smacks Most with it*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: Most, NNOOOOO! *cradles his dying body*


He was my sixth best friend...


*shrugs and starts slicing him up as well*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: *dumps the pile of Most and hammer slices into a plastic bag and flings the bag up onto the roof*


There you go, Infested_Peen. That'll be $600.
2018-01-23 [DarkRedKrueger]: Better go and fetch your food infested-peen.
2018-01-23 [Infested_Zling]: *sneakily slides him $599* ill ah, ill go get my bag of most... and hammer slices. or should i let it cook longer?
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: NO REFUNDS!


*karate chops FreddyKrueger's neck*
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: AND STAY OFF MY ROOF!
2018-01-23 [Sagacious Turkey]: But does anyone ever wonder what happened to the little elves that used to make everyone's shoes??? I hate having to go steal from the shoe store/funeral home nowadays. ;(
2018-01-23 [Mortified Penguin]: I just don't wear shoes anymore.


*points at his bloodied, mangled feet, covered in shards of glass and snails*
2018-01-24 [Nuktae-tal]: I just eat shoes *passes around shoe jerky tongues.*
2018-01-25 [Pied Crow]: Whoaaa, Penguin! Are you sure having that on your feet is legal?
2018-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Yeah, probably. But severing that guy's feet and feeding them to my snails probably wasn't... I wonder why he was walking in gl- HEY, WHAT THE FUCK?! *picks up one of the snails*


THIS ISN'T A SNAIL, IT'S JUST A SLUG WITH A CHIP STUCK TO ITS BACK!


*violently rips the snail's shell off and hurls it into traffic, causing a car to swerve and crash into a school bus*
2018-01-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Hahahaha turbo snails... * eats es car go*
2018-01-25 [Mortified Penguin]: Please don't eat my friends. :(
2018-01-25 [Pied Crow]: ... Let us get back to you on that.


Hey! No one's written up a friscal report for six years! Need we ask why?
2018-01-25 [Nuktae-tal]: Hey no Gerry frisky up here!
2018-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: I'M GETTING AROUND TO IT. I'm also getting around to changing the daily specials.
2018-01-26 [Pied Crow]: Who knows why, but I did the tedious copy-pasta work for you.
Pay me in either macro sergals or dragons.
2018-01-26 [Mortified Penguin]: Here, have a bunch of micro dragons: Ask Pauly the Anthro-Dragon!
2018-01-27 [Pied Crow]: Is that an exaggerated otherkin joke I see in there? Very promising!
2018-01-28 [Nuktae-tal]: A what who now?
2018-01-28 [Pied Crow]: We thought we were a therianthrope for a while, until we realized we were insulting therians everywhere. Now, we have a feathersona instead!
2018-01-28 [Nuktae-tal]: Feathers? Like a dinosaur?
2018-01-28 [Pied Crow]: That is correct. I am a bird with feathers, just like a dinosaur.


[Sagacious Turkey] is really a Prudent T-Rex.
2018-01-28 [Sideways]: Bob’s Diner needs a discord server. Badly
2018-01-28 [Pied Crow]: Discord server? I don't see the advantage, other than being accessible through Skype's replacement.
2018-01-28 [Sagacious Turkey]: *roars and eats a customer's head... prudently*
2018-01-29 [Pied Crow]: Mr. Turkey...! Are you...trying to seduce me?!
2018-01-29 [Sagacious Turkey]: *eats another customer's head... sensually*
2018-01-29 [Mortified Penguin]: I'm pretty sure a discord server would take away from the true diner's friscal earnings.
2018-01-30 [Pied Crow]: Turkey, you're such a beast! Now, pin me to the ground and growl at me, menacingly!
2018-01-30 [Sagacious Turkey]: *pins you to the ground and charges you $12.99 for an extra packet of (used) ketchup... menacingly*
2018-01-30 [Mortified Penguin]: MY PERSONAL KETCHUP STASH!
2018-01-31 [Yuriona]: Is it Dijon ketchup at least?
2018-01-31 [Pied Crow]: Everything's good with dinosaurs, HEEEELP!!!


Er, I mean... Nice try, but I only ever bring five dollars with me on small trips like this!
2018-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: Only five dollars?! Get off me, whore, I'm saving myself for marriage! *violently hurls Pie Crow into the oven*


*spots a wealthy looking old woman, fumbling through her purse for some old person candy*


Mmm... hey, baby, you look like you can afford my shipping and handling fees. Let's get a look at those prehistoric gams... *starts feeling up her prunes and even her raisins*
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *eats pre-wrapped dijon ramen*
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: Wait... GRANNY, NNNOOOOOOO!


*slaps Turkey*


GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY INHERITANCE!
2018-01-31 [Sagacious Turkey]: *starts groping her with his feet*
2018-01-31 [Pied Crow]: Put a fork in me, I'm done.
2018-01-31 [Pied Crow]: (I'm sure you've never heard that before!)
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: I've never heard anything before, I'm blind. Now get back in the oven, gazpacho takes at least twelve hours.


*shoves Cro (I'm too lazy to add the 'w') back into the oven and duct tapes it shut*
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *hangs some inspirational informational artwork in the bathroom, over the trough*


  

2018-01-31 [Nuktae-tal]: Meow
2018-01-31 [Mortified Penguin]: *slaps the hell out of the cat*


YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE CATCHING THE MICE IN THE KITCHEN! *points at a gang of possums, crouched threateningly and wielding nunchuks and katanas*


Also, stop eating my lasagna...
2018-02-01 [Nuktae-tal]: *whips out whips and whips self with whips in hand.*
2018-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: B-but... cats don't do that... they don't even have hands... and seldom self-flagellate... something is amiss here.
2018-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT ANTARCTICA, CAT?!


*pulls out a knife*


TELL ME AND I'LL LET YOU HAVE THIS REALLY COOL KNIFE!!
2018-02-01 [Pied Crow]: Well...? Is it safe to come out?
2018-02-01 [Mortified Penguin]: *kicks the oven*


SHUT UP IN THERE, WE'RE HAVING A CONVERSATION! I SAID TWELVE MORE HOURS!!
2018-02-01 [Nuktae-tal]: The Antarctic is very cold... and sort of North... depending on your point of view.
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Hmm, sounds factual. *hands over the deed to the knife*
2018-02-02 [Nuktae-tal]: Yes! * whips deed into shape... of a star*
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: ...


*stabs you with the knife*
2018-02-02 [Pied Crow]: Oh, I see how it is. I know when I've been insulted! I know when I've been insulted!


*over-exerts self and passes out*
2018-02-02 [~Crimson Angel~]:
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake


Keep your left eye open and your right toe twitchin'
Cause I'm in the kitchen
With a knife that's itchin' for your red blood
On those white sheets


So keep your left eye open and your right toe twitchin'
Cause I'm in the kitchen
With a knife that's itchin' for your red blood
On those white sheets


I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake


Keep your left eye open and your right toe twitchin'
Cause I'm in the kitchen
With a knife that's itchin' for your red blood
On those white sheets


So keep your left eye open and your right toe twitchin'
Cause I'm in the kitchen
With a knife that's itchin' for your red blood
On those white sheets


I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try, try and keep awake
I will kill you in your sleep
So you better try
Try and keep awake






  

2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: Speaking of, I should restart Death Note Game. We just need to have a bunch of active Elftowners first...
2018-02-02 [Pied Crow]: Sorry, I'm not into humans with knives.


Um, and I'm not good with forum games. Talking with degenerate birds is the most social activity I do for leisure these days.


*cooks for another 12 hours*
2018-02-02 [Mortified Penguin]: *looks up from his bible*


I'm not degenerate.   


*goes back to eating his bible*
2018-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-02-04 [Nuktae-tal]: Hay now! *throws hay in the air.*
2018-02-04 [Mortified Penguin]: *a cute, sweet pony looks visibly upset at the waste of all that perfectly good hay*


HAY! Get back in that meat grinder!


*shoves Misty into the meat grinder*


*gathers up all the loose hay and feeds it to the happy pony*
2018-02-05 [Pied Crow]: Hooray for birds!
2018-02-05 [Mortified Penguin]: Nobody likes birds. *spits in the bird bath in the middle of the diner*
2018-02-06 [Nuktae-tal]: *builds crows nest in ceiling fan and settles in comfortably* aye captain.
2018-02-06 [Pied Crow]: Hmm, let's think about this... What kind of ceiling fan would Bob's Diner install?
2018-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: You'd think it'd be something funny, like a helicopter propeller or something, but it isn't. It's just a regular old fan.


*turns it on, messing up several spider webs and launching a number of angry spiders into the air*


See? Lame. Though, it is impressive we managed to install a ceiling fan with no ceiling...


*the fan starts sparking up and spinning wildly out of control*


*it catches fire and detaches from the nonexistent ceiling*


*the flaming fan flies throughout the diner, flinging furious fiery spiders and decapitating a number of screaming, terrified patrons*


Laaaaame... *casually goes back to reading the paper*
2018-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: *circles an ad looking for new ShareBlue employees to shill Bob's Diner*


Hey, have you guys heard about this awesome Hillary guy? Totally better than Drumpf! And I'm like 80% sure she isn't a reptilian... But in all seriousness, we can't let that man near the nuclear codes.


*starts screaming incomprehensibly about two scoops and it having been HER TURN*


*five cents is deposited into my account*
2018-02-06 [Mortified Penguin]: Roll Tide!


  



But seriously though, they shouldn't have messed up my order...
2018-02-07 [Nuktae-tal]: Sad days...
2018-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: The nights are also sad too as well...
2018-02-07 [Pied Crow]: Hey. Don't joke about people being reptilians. We take that stuff seriously! Don't get our hopes up!!
2018-02-07 [~Crimson Angel~]: Taco Bell apparently has fries now, which is weird...
2018-02-07 [Pied Crow]: Oh. Yeah, nacho fries! They must be advertised well, everyone's talking about them.
2018-02-07 [Mortified Penguin]: I tried to order some, but apparently they were out and just gave me chips instead... Hence, the arson my lawyer keeps telling me to stop "bragging about" and "admitting to"... that fire was pretty nifty though.
2018-02-08 [Nuktae-tal]: That's because they were my fries nachos...
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]:   
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: *shrugs and just grows his own nacho potato tree*
2018-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *bursts in, brandishing a pile of cash threateningly*


HAND OVER THE SPECIAL AND TWO ORDERS OF THE MORE EXPENSIVE COOKED SUSHI OR ELSE!!
2018-02-08 [Mortified Penguin]: I TOLD YOU, WE DON'T NEGOTIATE WITH TERRORISTS!


Anyway, it was good doing business with you, Achmed. *hands him a large box labeled, "BOMBS - for rats"*


Good luck with your infid- er, rat problem. *tips his hat*
2018-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: Waaaiiiit a second... you don't have a hat!


*immediately calls the police*


Yeah, I was trying to rob this shithole and this guy here has a really suspicious hat. Yeah. Uh huh. My name? My location?! MY HIP SIZE?! Sorry, wrong number. Bye, I love you too.


*slams the rotary phone into the wall*


A swat team should be arriving soon to arrest everyone except me.
2018-02-08 [Sagacious Turkey]: *glances at the clock on the wall*


Aaaany minute now...
2018-02-09 [Pied Crow]: Mort!


... What happened to your pocket knife?
2018-02-09 [Nuktae-tal]: Hands up!! I'm the police! *rips off pants and begins to strip tease*
2018-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: This one...?


*starts to pull out his pocket knife, but is promptly gunned down by several naked police officers*
2018-02-09 [Mortified Penguin]: *the police surround Mort's corpse and start putting his hat in cuffs*


MY HAT!


*they also cuff Mort's corpse's lips*


MM LPS!!


*shrugs and goes back to reading his paper*
2018-02-10 [Pied Crow]: People? But, this isn't a village!