[Balthizar]'s diary

1093505  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-09-08
Written: (6118 days ago)

I dont ever want to be told.
That I am not insigificant.
Because I am.
And it pisses me off.

1093480  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-09-07
Written: (6118 days ago)

-soooo,last minute invite to a barbaque.
Gonna go.
cause well lets face it.
I have no reason to be home.
And I doubt I'll have anything to do online today.
I never seem to do as of late.
So..
Off to get ready.
Looking forward to actually being around people who give a shit.

1093295  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2009-09-06
Written: (6120 days ago)

Fuck you too.
I cant...
I'm not even going to try anymore.
I'm tired of asking.
i'm tired of begging.
I'm tired of trying so fucking hard.
And either not being appreiciated, or
For you to even care.
So.
I'm giving up.
Way to go to everyone.
I'm actually giving up.
Fuck off.
( And if you are pissed by this message, dont bother. I wont even discuss it. )

1093226  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2009-09-05
Written: (6121 days ago)

It's labor day weekend.
fun.

1093132  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2009-09-04
Written: (6122 days ago)

Another day.
Another clock punching.
No really.
I have a punch card.
Its awesome.

1093094  Link to this entry 
Written about Friday 2009-09-04
Written: (6122 days ago)

-So
Since I cannot rant.
Atleast where people can read, see, or hear.
Interesting tid bit.
Chicken.
Shouldnt taste like.
Something it shouldnt.
That...was weird.
Not un eatable.
because i ate it.
And it tasted good.
But it didnt taste like chicken.
And what it did taste like well....
I cant say.
Because well...I cant.
Well, I can.
But I wont.

1093011  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-09-03
Written: (6123 days ago)

Know what? I'll just hold my tongue and smile.
Its what the whole fucking world wants me to do anyways.
Heaven forbid I have someone to talk to.

1093010  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-09-03
Written: (6123 days ago)

--Is tired of all the hypocritsy.

1092980  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-09-03
Written: (6123 days ago)

Everyone has to face joy.
But the question is if you will do it alone.
And everyone has to come to terms with disapointment.
But will you meet with it alone?
And when regret, pain, and guilt rear their ugly heads.
Will you stand to meet them, with close friends at your back?
Or will you be alone?
Know this.
I will never leave the ones I love.
Alone.

1092979  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-09-03
Written: (6123 days ago)

A Queen isnt a Queen.
Untill she makes the Joker pay.
And the Joker doesnt pay.
Untill he is the Queens fool.
Once payment is made.
And the Queen is a Queen.
And the Joker is her fool.
An exchange is made.
A replacement if you will.
The Joker becomes the worlds Fool.
And the Queen gets to make someone else pay.

The weeping Willow is growing.
The Stone fence is done.
The Glade has returned to its living self.
Hes sitting now you can see him.
Sitting upon his throne.
Watching as people move down the road.
Passed his Weeping Willow.
His eyes are moving.
Darting from face to face.
Looking for someone.
Jut not anyone.
That someone who
So long ago shared his Willow throne.
Strangers continue to meet his gaze.
And with each pass he grows more uneased.
The roses are in bloom.
The pompomps in full swing.
The Great Weeping Willow soars into the sky.
Daring all to attempt to harm its charge.
For the Great Weeping Willow knows.
All to well how something precious can be lost.
When one does not take too great of care.
And so it guards its king, its master.
Protecting him within the confines of his kingdom.
And he will sit and stare.
Welcoming any who wish to stop.

1092975  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-09-03
Written: (6123 days ago)

Isnt that something?
Am I going to say what it is?
No.
But its something.

1092892  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2009-09-02
Written: (6124 days ago)

Was..in an awesome mood the last couple days.
Up untill the fight with Sydney tonight.
And once again.
my reasons for not talking to people
And bottling shit up is further strengthened.
Because when I do freaking open up
I get yelled at.
and just..yeah.
So, there you go.
Awesome four days.
Hoping tomorrow will be as well.
Though, from the sounds of it.
Its going to be boring as hell.

1092793  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-09-01
Written: (6125 days ago)

*puts finger to forehead, does weird little salute thing*
Off to bed.
Have to punch the clock tomorrow.
Always found that saying amusing.
Punching the clock.
tehe.
Anywho, later gators.

1092707  Link to this entry 
Written about Monday 2009-08-31
Written: (6126 days ago)

know whats funny?
Being let down isnt even a surprise anymore.
Its when I'm not let down
That I'm surprised.

1092573  Link to this entry 
Written about Sunday 2009-08-30
Written: (6127 days ago)

Damn nightmares.
I'm sleeping...ish.
I wake up several times during the night..

1092483  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2009-08-29
Written: (6128 days ago)

I need it you know?
please?
I know I know, I sound emo.
I'm just...I don't know.
I just..meh
whatever.
I'll be fine.
Just need a night of no nightmares yes?
Yes.
So...to bed I go.
Yup.
Off I go.

1092453  Link to this entry 
Written about Saturday 2009-08-29
Written: (6128 days ago)

Going to the movies.
Tired of being in the house.
It gets to you.

1092260  Link to this entry 
Written about Thursday 2009-08-27
Written: (6130 days ago)

The biggest joke of the year.

1092123  Link to this entry 
Written about Wednesday 2009-08-26
Written: (6131 days ago)

Nothing better.

1092051  Link to this entry 
Written about Tuesday 2009-08-25
Written: (6131 days ago)

Going out driving.
I've got tons of errands.
And...I need to clear my head.
I'll..be back online whenever.
Not like I have much of a reason to be online.

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