things are so confusing lately i just never know what is going on. i mean, i usually don't but at the same time i do to an extent. i just keep crashing and my friends are leaving me, my birthday present got delivered to the wrong house, no one wants to talk to me and those who do are never around very long. my mind is held captive by that look in your eye as i twist the blade deeper into your gut. it's feelings like these that have me confused i used to love girls and now it seems like i want to murder them all. i just really need someone to come and save me you know, to pick me up brush me off tell me it will be alright and then be there solid. i have no use for someoen that will come and go what i need is a lifelong mate ugh i can't even straiten out my thoughts and my feelings it is all entangled and it burns. free me bloody dagger, free me from this wretched flesh and free me from myself. here we go people the secret to winning me over

1. never lie to me
2. trust me
3. be trustworthy
4. be reliable
5. give me a lot of attention
6. listen to what i say and try to understand me
7. read what i write it is the only way to truely know who i am my writing is my soul
8. i am like a puppy...go from there

would it be really gay if I started writing in this thing? please answer