How do, i just thought in light of the deviously creative streak i've been building up for the last couple of weeks, i'd put up some of my more memorable messages of recent times.

" Letter number: 5291369
From: [Joey Division] (Ich bein einen twat )
To: [nudge the dude] (Naaaaa...)
Sent mail 2005-07-22 13:37:42
Unread

 
oh so ur not gonna answer my carefully prepared messages. I spent hours on them, lavishing them with all the care jordan would have for a cornish pasty... no 2 cornish pasties, and u cant even be bothered to answer me. I tell u what tell everyone every one to fuck off and start giving a shit bout our band cause i've had enough of ur diva bullshit, u can fuck off if u think im gonna be respectful towards u after you've so unceremonuosly emptied the contents of ur bowels copiously on my head, and forced me to eat it up; well im not gonna eat it; im not jordan i dont eat the tears of orphans or the pensions of old people despite Ash proclamations ( allright im paraphrasing, he only really said he was annoyed at me for playin in one key, which is the most pretenious thing ever cause hes the most musically illetereate people i know.) I deserve a proper band member who cares. You can go to the jazz band for ur music preformance ( By the way Mr. led zepplin that is the anthesis of rock n roll as u know it) and hide behind them playin the 2nd cornet ( Fact) part which the 1st cornet player probally taught u orally u know with a cornetto, but i cantr i rock in earnset buddy, and i need at least one to get stuck in with me in unison, and u aint doin that at the moment.


Further more.. im a veritable intelectual colosus, my genius, and the stimulus i provide, will invaribly make u a more consenoius person devoid with all the pretensions and self dilusions of ur contempories"

This war partly a joke, though knowing him it will go, inveraibly, over his head.. Whichs beg the question why did i even post it in the first place? Cause im a condescending smug lil b$stard, so i've been told ( but at least i have the courtesey to censor my work to a certain degree.