...i have to be strong...both mentally and emotionally...right, [konzen doji]? ^^

YAAAY!!! TODAYS MY LAST PERFORMANCE!!! WISH ME LUCK Y'ALL!!!

...sensitivity...? ...awareness of the needs and emotions of others...? you said i have that...?

Wish me luck people...i have another play tonight! by the way, megan and i have made up completely, we're fine with each other--but i dunno about our parents, megans dad was giving me this odd look while i was standing next to megan on stage when we were doing our bows...

^_^ i should have a picture of me in my dress (and bonet XD) that would basically be dedicated to...three people mostly:
[Mohazy], [SorryGoodbyeGirl], and [a boy named sue]...i just hope he comes back soon u_u

last part of my whole megan ordeal (we're doing okay right now, we apologysed to each other, but our parents...i dont think they like each other anymore... o.o")

my mom went to go talk to jason (megans dad) and they started to yell, and i was sitting in the car and i was scared so i called [Not Anymore]'s mom (rikkis grounded, so i went to the next best person...she treats me like her daughter -^^-) and she  calmed me down, but then they came outside, and megans dad ran over to our car before mom could get over to our car to leave (by then i was screaming and covering my head because i thought he was coming over to hit me), got into his plow truck, and threatened to run us over if we didnt get  off his property...and he got my mom really pissed because he was trying to  tell her (more like yell to her actully) how to raise me, he said i get angry too easily with megan and i "treat her like shit" and stuff...and he  also said "and dont come cryin to me when my daughter comes and kicks your  ass! because i wont do a god damn thing about it! you have it coming to  you! little fucking bitch!", and he also told me i was too nice for my own good the other times, and stupid stuff like that--and thats when i snapped...im scared of getting yelled at, but that was too much...i broke into tears, and i could hardly sleep last night, i went to bed at 11:40, i was woken up at  midnight because there was a cop here (mom called the police) and...i  dunno...im still a little shooken up from it all...

i had a logn day yesterday...

After dance practice, my friend megan and i got into an arguement over our practice CD--because i have bigger lines in the dance i needed it the most, but she yelled at me to shut up, and i told her, calmly back to her to not tell me to shut up, and then her dad called me over to his truck, and started to cuss his head off at me, calling me all sorts of horrible stuff...there more to it, but ill update later...

ugh...too tired to do much...throats killing me(again)...im sore all over from dancing 4 straight hours at dress rehersal last night (6-10...didnt really get home untill 10:30, didnt get to bed untill 11:30, and i wake up every mornin' at 6:20...)...i kept waking up, almost every hour, last night, because i kept having dreams about our dance for the play...WHHYYY?! it wont stop trying to haunt meeee!!

i actually had a good night sleep last night! it shows! *points to drool on the side of her face* i only drool when im sleeping peacefully ^.^;; anyway, im sitting here, still worrying...im told you're okay but i just cant help it...i wanna hear it from you... *sigh*

Wheeeen will you come baaaaack [a boy named sue]!! ;-;

to put things simple...i dont want to go to school, i ache all over from dancing from 6 to 9:30 last night, and i have to keep doing that untill saturday, then saturday i dont have to do crap, and sunday, but then i have to practice more monday through wednesday because our opening performance is on thursday i believe...this play is killing me...plus, to add onto that, my stomach hurts @_@;

when will you come back, goku? u_u

this morning when i woke up i felt like today was going to be one of those days to be hated...i was semi-correct

Some stupid kid stole my binder full of my penpals' and role models' (Nykii and [Not Anymore]) drawings...they grabbed one of nykii's drawings and put a pair of scizzors up to it, they were only kidding, but i leapt up out of my seat, grabbed the kids arm, and bit into it... o.o; he bled a little bit, and i didnt get into any trouble...buuut i got my piccy back! X3 *hugs the pic, and puts it safely back inside the binder*

Blaaah!! im still missing my friend! and im in an angry mood today, i dont want to have to go back to schoooooool!!! graaah!!!

i was told this song matches me... o.o

who i am (jessica andrews)

If I live to be a hundred
And never see the seven wonders
That'll be alright
If I don't make it to the big leagues
If I never win a Grammy
I'm gonna be just fine
'Cause I know exactly who I am

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know just where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am

So when I make a big mistake
When I fall flat on my face
I know I'll be alright
Should my tender heart be broken
I will cry those teardrops knowin'
I will be just fine
'Cause nothin' changes who I am

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know just where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am

I'm a saint and I'm a sinner
I’m a loser, I'm a winner
I'm steady and unstable
I'm young but I am able

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am

I am Rosemary's granddaughter
The spitting image of my father
And when the day is done
My momma's still my biggest fan
Sometimes I'm clueless and I'm clumsy
But I've got friends that love me
And they know where I stand
It's all a part of me
And that's who I am
That is who I am

well, today started off horrible with me waking up to a nightmare, then having a bad day at school, then me calling my dad...THAT was a mistake on my behalf -.-;; ...but, i talked with good friends today, so now im happy again! *starts to doodle* ^_^ and im so happy kibaba liked his picture! *grabs pen, ready to ink it*

my fav face: º_º

^_^ special thanks to my good friend [SorryGoodbyeGirl], for helping me to smile again -^o^-

so...lonely... T_T i want to speak with you...but you're away... can friends of him tell him this? i have so much to say...and to casey and marisa: im still really stressed you guys...and you cant help by talking to me...i may seem happy to you, but im not...the only way ill be happy, is if you guys stop acting like freaking babys and act your own age and solve your own god darn problem! ...sorry, i had to get that out...please dont be angry with me...just bare with me...

kind of really stressed...lets just leave it at that...

im a little teapot... o.o thats all for today.....MWAAA!!!!

im kinda not so happy today...

Ugh, i got Toboe (my friend, i will not say her real name, toboe is just her nickname) upset, and trying to get her out of it is proving to be stressful...i need to learn to shut off my hands and do more schoolwork or im not going to florida! (yes [Rydia], that IS all that matters to me right now from this deal, even if it is for just a week) so im going to try to take a stuffed friend with me (to keep my hands busy. i have a problem that when my hands want to do something and the teacher is boring enough ill start drawing) so ill pay more attention and take notes! wish me luck everyone! ~_~;

you once said... "aside from two other people, people treat me like an animal, but you treat me like a human being" once before to me...i saw it again, and it hit something...ya know what? thats it! i dont care if people know who you are anymore! [a boy named sue]! i miss you!

well, i figured out my certain friend is doing well, i had a chance to be able to talk with them, but i didnt take it, it still doesnt stop me from worrying though.... *Sigh* and to all these people out there: im not ready for a real deep relationship yet...i have yet to find someone who makes me feel tingly and happy inside, im sorry all, but im just not ready...im feeling a little melcacholy, and i might not talk to some people unless they are really nice about this all... u-u i dont want to go to school, stupid snow didnt cancel, or delay it this time! >_O ... *sigh* well, thats all for now, and once again, sorry people...