right now there's alot of things on my mind and ive been really sad latly and for that i apologize but the only reason why i apologize for how i feel (again)towards this: im beginning to give up on alot of things......just leave a comment and do as you wish ill be here for everyones little problems then in the end getting stomped on,and losing hold of all of my dreams.....why do the innocent suffer so...when all they ask for is tranquility....for really dont care anymore and have almost given up on life from this point forth whatever happens happens ...i already know ill lose again. but whatever...
         -Nic

melina heres alittle bit of advice for the way you feel about everyone changing ok...I know how you feel people come and go its really hard to deal with sometimes but you cant control peoples opinions or the way they see things its a part of life i know its fucked up but ....take it as it comes and live life to the fullest and have no regrets...thats what i came up with after i lost all of my friends my freshmen year for some reason rumors were spread about something (that i am to this day still oblivious to)
and one by one, day by day my dearest friends would turn on me like a male eagle to its offspring.its best not to worry about it people come and go its a part of life but if you find the one you wish to spend the rest of your life with then and only then be willing to fight for the love you feel towards that person(like i am now) but pathic ,childish quarrels like this should be the least of your problems.

Cold was my soul
Untold was the pain
I faced when you left me
A rose in the rain
So I swore to the razor
That never, enchained
Would your dark nails of faith
Be pushed through my veins again

Evanescent like the scent of decay
I was fading from the race
When in despair, my darkest days
Ran amok and forged her face
From the fairest of handmaidens to
A slick perverted wraith


Nymphetamine


Heaving midst narcissus
On a maledict blanket of stars
She was all three wishes
Sex, sex, sex


A lover hung on her death row
I was hooked on her disease
Highly strung like Cupid's bow
Whose arrows hungered meat
And the blinding flare of passion
In the shade of narrow streets
Where their poison never rationed
All the tips they left in me


Two tracks
Bric-a-brac
Something passed between us
Like a bad crack
Upward-lit
I'd met another kind


Of rat
In fact
With every rome inside me
Licked and ransacked
She haunted at the corners of my mind


In black
Cataracts
Wouldn't whitewash away
Her filthy smoke stack
She burnt me like a furnace
For my future suicide


Lead to the river
Midsummer, I waved
A 'V'' of black swans
On with hope to the grave
All through Red September
With skies fire-paved
I begged you appear
Like a thorn for the holy ones


Cold was my soul
Untold was the pain
I faced when you left me
A rose in the rain
So I swore to the razor
That never, enchained
Would your dark nails of faith
Be pushed through my veins again


Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?
For once upon a time
From the binds of your lowliness
I could always find
The right slot for your sacred key


Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, a vampyric addiction
To her alone in full submission
None better
Nymphetamine


Nymphetamine, nymphetamine
Nymphetamine girl
Nymphetamine, nymphetamine
My nymphetamine girl


Wracked with your charm
I am circled like prey
Back in the forest
Where whispers persuade
More sugar trails
More white lady laid
Than pillars of salt


Fold to my arms
Hold their mesmeric sway
And dance her to the moon
As we did in those golden days


Christening stars
I remember the way
We were needle and spoon
Mislaid in the burning hay


Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?
For once upon a time
From the binds of your holiness
I could always find
The right slot for your sacred key


Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, a vampyric addiction
To her alone in full submission
None better
Nymphetamine


Sunsetter
Nymphetamine (Nymphetamine)
None better
Nymphetamine


Two tracks
Bric-a-brac
Something passed between us
Like a bad crack
Upward-lit
I'd met another kind


Of rat
In fact
With every rome inside me
Licked and ransacked
She haunted at the corners of my mind


In black
Cataracts
Wouldn't whitewash away
Her filthy smoke stack
She burnt me like a furnace
For my future suicide

Evanescent like the scent of decay
I was fading from the race
When in despair, my darkest days
Ran amok and forged her face
From the fairest of handmaidens to
A slick perverted wraith


Nymphetamine


Heaving midst narcissus
On a maledict blanket of stars
She was all three wishes
Sex, sex, sex


A lover hung on her death row
I was hooked on her disease
Highly strung like Cupid's bow
Whose arrows hungered meat
And the blinding flare of passion
In the shade of narrow streets
Where their poison never rationed
All the tips they left in me


Two tracks
Bric-a-brac
Something passed between us
Like a bad crack
Upward-lit
I'd met another kind


Of rat
In fact
With every rome inside me
Licked and ransacked
She haunted at the corners of my mind


In black
Cataracts
Wouldn't whitewash away
Her filthy smoke stack
She burnt me like a furnace
For my future suicide


Lead to the river
Midsummer, I waved
A 'V'' of black swans
On with hope to the grave
All through Red September
With skies fire-paved
I begged you appear
Like a thorn for the holy ones


Cold was my soul
Untold was the pain
I faced when you left me
A rose in the rain
So I swore to the razor
That never, enchained
Would your dark nails of faith
Be pushed through my veins again


Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?
For once upon a time
From the binds of your lowliness
I could always find
The right slot for your sacred key


Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, a vampyric addiction
To her alone in full submission
None better
Nymphetamine


Nymphetamine, nymphetamine
Nymphetamine girl
Nymphetamine, nymphetamine
My nymphetamine girl


Wracked with your charm
I am circled like prey
Back in the forest
Where whispers persuade
More sugar trails
More white lady laid
Than pillars of salt


Fold to my arms
Hold their mesmeric sway
And dance her to the moon
As we did in those golden days


Christening stars
I remember the way
We were needle and spoon
Mislaid in the burning hay


Bared on your tomb
I'm a prayer for your loneliness
And would you ever soon
Come above unto me?
For once upon a time
From the binds of your holiness
I could always find
The right slot for your sacred key


Six feet deep is the incision
In my heart, that barless prison
Discolours all with tunnel vision
Sunsetter
Nymphetamine
Sick and weak from my condition
This lust, a vampyric addiction
To her alone in full submission
None better
Nymphetamine


Sunsetter
Nymphetamine (Nymphetamine)
None better
Nymphetamine


Two tracks
Bric-a-brac
Something passed between us
Like a bad crack
Upward-lit
I'd met another kind


Of rat
In fact
With every rome inside me
Licked and ransacked
She haunted at the corners of my mind


In black
Cataracts
Wouldn't whitewash away
Her filthy smoke stack
She burnt me like a furnace
For my future suicide

Ive gotten to the point where im saying fuck my past because its holding me back from everythingi want to do and its really fucking me up inside so,im leaving my past behind me(which means i may change alittle i hope it doesnt freak out kat)I geuss you could say my new catch phase is fuck the bull-shit from now on if someone comes up to me with a problem they can go figure it out on there own because not only do you learn from but you'll gain valuable life experience....No hard feeling anyone and no this does not mean im closed for advice.

THOSE WHO WANNA KNOW WHAT I FEEL LIKE INSIDE....THIS EXPLAINS ALOT ABOUT HOW I FEEL IF ANYONE CARES....


*GOODBYE*SR-71


I'm everything you know
You wonder friend of foe
I'm the burning in your throat when you swallow
But you spit me out
Your stomach full of doubt
And still you're faking every word out of your mouth
But you won't let go
It's all about control
Understand I'm born to lead you will follow
I don't wanna stay
I'm running away
Don't you hear me when i say
Goodbye...so long...nice try...I'm gone
You don't like being second
I don't like being wrong
I won't forget the way you made me feel
I won't regret running away from here
You think you see the world well you see nothing
Time is only gonna make it worse in the end
So I'll say goodbye again
Now it's there to see
You've forgiven me
Ever since I was the prince among theives
So you hold me down
Strip away my crown
Can't contain me knowing all the truth I found
Always thinking small
Helping me to fail
Now you're jealousy and hate consumes us all
I don't wanna stay
I'm running away
Don't you hear me when i say
Don't hit me with you fears
I won't fit with your ideas
You missed whatI'm about
I earned my way out
And in the end
I'll say goodbye again