If I could start again,
A million miles away,
I would keep myself.
I would find a way.
<3 Sian, thank you for being there for me :$.
I thought you were not my kind
I thought I could never feel for you.
The passion and love you were feeling
and so you left,
For someone new.
And now that your far and away,
im sending a letter today.
She got hte love that she was dreaming of,
She never found the words to say,
But I know that today,
She's gonna send her letter to you.
She could dare to fall in love with you.
I think you want to hang up the phone.
Im ready.
Today was not as good as I thought it would be.
Dear diary,
Today I was supposed to meet Bert for lunch but steve called and she didnt eat.
She just talked to him.
Which I forgive her for :)
I ate lunch with Vag.
I'm kind of worried about her :/
Our drama is going to be awesome.
It feels good to be feeling confident about things.
I had a really...Good break.
And I was thinking about it all through my dance lesson. <3
Just so you know, little things count.
Um, Yeah, I dont like two faced people. Lets not even go there.
WHAT A FAG.
Joe keeps calling me a DOOSHBAG even though I started that.
The phone just rang me, but it isnt for me. I just had a shower and I feel clean. I like feeling clean. Tomrrow is a special day, it is wednesday and wednesdays are special.
It is the 11th of January tomorrow.
I think you know.
For dance I couldnt be bothered so I told her that I forgot my kit. So I got a comment and I had to join in anyway. I felt really self conscious and gross the whole time. I said it was my "cramps" but it wasnt. I was just having an ugly despite trying hard to make it a pretty day. I feel horrible in my clothes.
Especially uniform.
Okay and then, lets see.
I came home and, Listened to Aqualung.
Im petrified, hypnotised, everytime you walk by. <3 Yes sir you know indeed.
My feet are numb because I am sitting on them. I am in a bathrobe and my nipples are freezing. I should go get some clothes on.
/Out.
I tried to look pretty today.
Sometimes I do silly shit like that.
Break was nice <3
Our drama is going to be awesome, Mrs Behaabt.
And Thrust and Thrust and Thrust and Roll and Roll.
It was the last couple of weeks I guess.
Harriet and I had quite an amusing conversation at form time.
Me: Are you going to get really wasted at James' Party?
Hatty: Hmm, Maybe, im not going to go there thinking Im going to just get really drunk though.
Me: *Snort* I am!
Hatty: Haha, well last time I did that, It didnt turn out..too great.
Me: Well, atleast you got some Cock.
Hatty: Lmao. SO? YOUR NOT GOING TO GET ANY,
Me: I DONT WANT ANY. Im just saying im going to get drunk man.
Hatty: Well you were implying that by drinking you get cock.
Me: No i was implying that if your harriet and you drink you get cok.
Hatty: *silence*...We
Me: LOOK AT MY FACE. AM I BOVVERED?
Hatty: lmao, No you can have Nick cock.
Me: Yes missy.
Hatty: Shut up.
Me: no You.
Hatty: No you.
Me: Fag.
Hatty: CUNT.
Me: FUCK OFF.
Hatty: GET A LIFE.
Me: FAG.
HATTY: FAGGER.
Me: YOUR NOT GETTTING LUCKY.
Hatty: YOUR NOT GETTING DRUNK.
ME: FAG.
Something Interesting. And kind of silly.
I always always save interesting emails I send to people on my hotmail outbox.
oka.y.
EXAMPLAY:
Hi bert.
I just wanted to say, please remeber to meet me at the coin at lunch, for well...our lunch :)
And secondly, Please come and find me before school or at break (Im always by those cool benches) cuz I really need you to do my hair :$ Eeep.
I havent seen much of you, I miss you.
I hope things are okay, we didnt get a chance to talk much today :( Sad face.
REMEMBER WE ARE HAVING LUNCH TOGETHER. THAT IS OUR PLANS. DONT FORGET IT MAN.
I always try to find you :$ All your friends are annoyed at me for asking for you all the time. James included.
Its your turn, I always want to see you.
Talk to you later, babe.
Night night. x
Hi, I did some crunches and I feel sexy. Im going to tie my hair up tomorrow.
I should email bertie and remind her to meet me to tie it up for me :$.
Night.
I hardly slept last night.
I woke up, and I was awake.
I went to school.
Almost missed the bus.
Forgot my headphones :/
Um. I ate an iced finger for lunch.
And, I poked Becky in the face with my pen during media.
Mr. BENTLY saw me, and kept making jokes to everyone to hide their,
FACES.
No wonder people call me face.
I dont know what to do anymore with myself.
I listened to JAMESBLUNT with Ryan today on the bus.
And, it was fun.
Umm. I got home, my dad left. yay.
And then I had a shower and Washed my self real good.
Okay.
<3.
I dont know,
I dont know what he's after.
But, He's so beautiful.
This is such a Beautiful Disaster.
And if only I could hold on,
through the
Tears and the Laughter.
Maybe, We could have seen.