Alright this is prolly going to be an off entry....im sure people(you know who you are) are going to be reading this so i have to be careful on what i say. Basically im crushed as all fuck and dont know what to do. I have been noticing im a unstabble person and i cant make up my mind. But most of all i push people i care for away...the ones who care the most. I dont know exactly whats wrong with me but i do know that i have lost everything.But why am i complaining right? it could be worse...maybe i shouldnt say that cause it will be worse soon. Bye to all my beautiful readers out there in cyberspace. Told you this one was going to be fucked up no sence in any of it. And to you elise im not mad at you at all just disapointed in myself...and paul im not mad at you either. im ending there
Im trying to make things better with my ex which is really hard to do! I really want it to work though cause hes the closest thing to a true friend i actually have. Yes i have my bf but i cant tell him everything...i
Urr...well this is just going to say some things not much of course but a lil. I miss my bestest friend PAUL! I know this will make a few angry but I cant help he really gets me and understands me even when i dont say anything and thats a true friend. I know we havent been the best latly and its been totally rocky on both sides of the friendship but damnit i really want to try and fix things but when i want to he doesnt or vis versa. And when we start to things get screwed up again and I just wish things could change. But it doesnt seem like that will happen cause hes been avoiding me ALOT, he said he wants us to be close again and I want that to but how are we going to have that chance? I will have to figure something out soon cause Im NOT I mean HARDCORE NOT going to lose him again for anything in the world!!!!
Well right now I feel sad and completly empty.I dont really know why it's just how I am feeling, and usually how I always feel. Even when I start to feel happiness it quickly changes into something terrible or even worse. Hrrmm...all my friends have deserted me for some odd reason or another.I guess I'm just destined to be alone, yes I have my bf but sometimes I dont feel like I mean anything to him either. He trys all the time but it feels blank most of the time you know? I guess you wouldnt sense your not me but theres no way I can really describe it so you understand either.
Oh jeez I'm going to stop whinning its pointless and so am I! Bye to those who care!