So I spent an hour and a half in the gym, managed to drink a half gallon of water while there, and managed to lose 1 Kilogram. How does that work?

Here is why I am scared if I ever had to call the police in an Emergancy:
Step 1: Dial Police
Step 2: Listen to it ring 5 times
Step 3: hear a slow speaking recording saying "Thank you for calling the District 1 Police Station. If it is an Emergancy, please hang up and dial 9-1-1
Step 4: Hang up and dial 9-1-1
Step 5: Hear another recorded message saying "Thank you for calling 911, for service in English press 1
Step 6: Press 1 for the love of GAWD!
Step 7: Explain the situation to the operator
Step 8: Give them your name
Step 9: Give them your address
Step 10: Give them your phone number
Step 11: Get told they will call the police, the ones that you tried to call back in Step 1:
Step 12: Listen to the operator tell the police officer the situation
Step 13: Listen to the operator tell the police officer your name
Step 14: Listen to the operator tell the police officer your address
Step 15: Listen to the operator tell the police officer your phone number
Step 16: Get transfered through to police officer
Step 17: Explain the situation yet again.
Step 18: Get asked how many people are involved
Step 19: Get told that he is sending an officer over
Step 20: Get told to have a good night and end the call

So some guy (We'l call him dumbass#1) came over to get revenge on another guy (Dumbass#2) for grabbing some girl at a party. There were a bunch of microthugs and prostitots outside the apartment waiting for dumbass#2 to come by with his friends, Dumbass#2s car pulls up, a girl jumps out and starts begging with this muscleheaded dumbass#1 not to start a fight, then the #1 starts kicking the car and #2 drives away almost hitting a bunch of the crowd. the morons hang around, #1 pulls out a phone and calls the girl who had been grabbed and all the prostitots start screaming that she's a slut and a whore, then the girls go inside and the microthugs hang out with #1 for half an hour talking about past fights and how tough they are. A truck pulls up, more dumbasses get out, then some dumbasses leave in the truck, some go inside, then leave, eventually leaving just #1 as the only male remaining. Apparently he texted #2 and said he promised not to fight him, and #2 finally returned, came inside and I heard yelling then #2 came out, went to his purple car, pulled out a crowbar and walked over to #1s car, where #1 and some girls had gotten into it to drive away. #1 comes over with the crowbar and smashes the back window where a girl is sitting and I hear her screaming, them he starts smashing the front window and windshield, get in his car with some friends and drive away. At this point I'm calling the cops who show up shortly after. One of the girls involved is my neighbor (who I got evicted... hehe dumb children) and it was in that apartment where the inside stuff happened and these people are always hanging out anyways. The cop took their report and they were all to willing to name names after being assaulted. To avoid having to give a report, I just hung my head out the window and said to the cop "What they said is better than I could explain it!" He nodded and drove off. So much excitement at 1:30am.

In Conclusion: I can finally check "Calling 911 for a Legitimate Reason." off my list of things to do before I die.

This is the first job I think I've ever had where I complain about getting 4 days off and going Yay when I get to work again. But the weather is so nasty that my clients have rebooked for another time. My next paycheck is going to be a tiny one. Boooo.

Final Fantasy Tactics...And how it annoys the piss outta me

Alright, time for another video game rant. This time the classic Final Fantasy Tactics. My biggest grievance so far, and I'm only level 5, is that All the enemies counter attack. All The TIME. If I mis, they counter, if I hit them for 15 damage, they counter for 20, and since they level up with me, they get stronger every time too. And the piddly JP I'm getting, even with the increased JP ability I added on, it's still taking forever to level up my jobs.

And my other problem is whenever it goes to story telling mode, the text draaags out. It took 30 seconds for it to type out eventually, E.........v.........e.......n.......t... You get the idea.

Finally, the enemy can roam freely. I mean... I had the guy surrounded on all but one side, and he walked around all my warriors and half way across the screen to kill my healer. Maybe I'm spoiled by D&D but if you have 3 guys surrounding the enemy, you think an Attack of Opportunity wouldn't be to far fetched. Gah.

So it's been done. Starting at 4:30, I saw 5 drunk people stumbling around the driveway of the apartment, one girl couldn't even stand up. Then, from 4:30 to 8:30 there was nothing but wall shaking rap playing, people screaming at each other which sounded like they hated each other. Seriously, when you're hanging with friends and you ask where the beer is, do your friends say "It's in the fucking fridge you Fucking Bitch!" The smell of weed and booze was crawling through the walls and under the doors, pounding on the walls, Fuck fuckity fuck fuck yelling. Hearing them talking about kicking peoples asses didn't really inspire me to go over and ask them politely to keep it down, considering only yesterday the land lord had given them a final warning about the noise, So I called up the land lord, who is an old gym teacher who just had back surgery. As soon as his truck pulled up the music stopped and then whole party I heard running up the stairs to hide in the apartments second floor. The LL came in and talked to me, commenting on the horrid smell in the halls, asking all that I had heard. Since I know the people upstairs can hear what I was saying, I kept my voice low. I'll give him the full details on Monday, but they're gone.

What sold me on this apartment was definitely not the price, lemme tell you. It was the space and the promise of quiet neighbors. If I wanted a place where it was nonstop loud all day and night, I wouldn't have left the dorms, and I have enough experience from the past 6 years to know that loud annoying don't get tired of being annoying, and a request for quiet generally lasts as long as it takes you to get back to your room.

I don't mind the hum of people talking that will inevitably come through the wall, but when the music is shaking the house and people are yelling so loudly they might as well be standing right next to me, That's just pointless and rude.

**UPDATE

After an hour, the party has started up again... But why the HELL is Justin Timberlake making my walls shake?!

And Lifehouse? Wow... these guys are hardcore thuggin'

So I'm listening to the people in the apartment next to me. And here are some of the quotes I'm hearing from the 4 o 5 people in there:

"Where The Fuck is the Fuckin' Weed?!"
"It's In The Fuckin Cupboard you Fuck!"
"fuck you you Fucking Fuckhole!"
"You Fucking Asked Where The Fucking Wee Was!
"I'm fucking going to get Fucking Stoned!"
"Where's The Fuckin Cat? I fucking wanna blow smoke in it's fuckin face!"
"Fuck man leave the fuckin' cat alone!"
"I fuckin' Don't give a fuck about your fuckin cat!"
"Fuck guys I'm Fuckin Drunk and it's only 4 Fuckin 30! And I'm Fuckin Stoned!"
"Get The Fuck out of the fuckin bathroom! I Gitta Fuckin Piss!"
"Fuck You I'm Taking a Fuckin' Shit!"

... And now 50cent is making the pipes in the whole complex vibrate...

You know, as great a thing as laughter is, there are so many variations some are bound to be bad. Like Beavis and Butthead. I know a guy who's laughter sounds like Woody Woodpecker, and then there's the Goofy laughter. The one I can't stand the must is the one monotone Huhuhu ~pause~ Huhuhu ~Pause Huhuhu laughter. It just... brings to mind the image of someone who's brain is running only for function, not for purpose. I don't know why. Now, there are great laughs. Adorable giggles for instance. Little girls giggling, or a baby chuckling, or even guys who's laughter has some tone to it doesn't bother me, but the ones I listed above just send bad chills through my bones.

Or maybe like so many other things that annoy me, it's because it's a noise. I'm no music addict, I can handle subtitles. I think I could live a happy deaf life much more than I could a blind one.

I don't know how often I can say this. I love my job, and the perks keep piling up. Seriously the only complaints I have about being here are nothing to do with my job, and more to do with the people that have nothing to do with my job. My newest excitement is the realization that because of my gym membership, I can go whenever I want, it's right around the corner and use the equipment and watch movies while doing it, but there is the whirlpool hot tub that I have unlimited access to. Today after 3 hours in the gym (I'll be regretting that tomorrow), I got to soak for half an hour in the bubbly jets and just let them pound on my sore muscles that come from work. Then I just laid back and kinda got swept around in the current.

People who know me in person know I have an extremely low tolerance for noise, and when I dunked my head under the water and all I could hear were the jets of water it was paradise. I think I will prescribe myself a soak every day after work for the rest of my life.

Now that I'm out of my "Love is Over" stage, I'm now in a "Screw Romance" Mood. I am sick of dedicating myself to one person to get kicked to the curb over and over. There are so many different kinds of love. There's Romantic Love, Flirtatious Love, Friendship Love, Comfortable Love, Old Love, New Love, Red Love, Blue Love. I have a lot of friends who I love and wish nothing but the best for, who I am comfortable with and comfortable being myself around, People who I love protectively and would do anything for.
Now, in the past, I've fucked up. Multiple times I fucked up by sleeping or fooling around with people I cared nothing for, didn't have any love on any level for, and I regretted doing it afterwards. To this day I still regret it and kick myself whenever I remember things even if they happened 4 or 5 years ago.
Since I've vowed to stay single until after my road trip, I've become curious about how I would react emotionally after possibly making the sexing with somebody who I have known a long time, trust and care about on a comfortable Friendship Love, without any desire for wedding bells in the future. I don't imagine I would feel the "Used and Abused" sensation considering I trust my friends, and I've always said "Sex without Love just doesn't feel right", but there is love there on some level.
Maybe I'm just thinking through my balls because I don't want to get laid by any of the nastiness around here. I live so close to the ocean I can't tell where that fish smell is really coming from if you get my drift.

Anyways, this has been Strats Rammblings for the day, I'ma go figure out what the hell Red Love and Blue Love are. It just sounded funny in my head.

**This does not mean I'm going to go whoring around to any friend who will have me. I'm just curious about what level of love is actually required for me not to feel like I did something wrong. No intentions of actively seeking an answer.**

So just as I'm feeling fine and dandy again, no more drama, I go and have one of those relationship nightmares that makes me unable to go back to sleep after 3 hours. Blaaaaaaaah

Anyways, Screw this. I've resolved that since I am planning a coast length road trip to meet a bunch of girls I know from the internet, the best thing to do is to say single than have a relationship and then try to explain to the girl why I plan on spending a month with a bunch of different girls, all attractive enough to inspire jealousy in whatever girl I am tangled with at the time. So I'm going to stay single. The people on my list I've known far longer than anyone I'm going to meet in this town.

The dreams still disturb me, but I'm not going to whine and pine anymore. I've much better things to do in the meantime.

Also, I secured a 3 bedroom apartment downtown, everything included except heat and furnishing, for 550$ a month. That split between 3 people would be living easy street! Anyone wanna move to NB to be my quiet roomie? I'll pay part of your rent if you're a hot female willing to walk around topless!

So Kathryn tells me today women don't want boys, they want men... and I take this as some sort of jab at me being childish... Starting next week I'm going to be dealing with a young girl from a broken home who's father has very very high expectations of me since the girl is also a drug addict and a bunch of other issues stemming from her parents divorce... He requested me because word of mouth around this town has me as the best massage therapist that's ever lived in St. Andrews from my regular clients comments.

Also, I have a travel writer coming in. Travel Writers are people who get paid by magazine companies to go to different resorts and live in the lap of luxury and write a critique on his visit, and as I'm sure everyone can understand, a good critique is a very important thing to a summer resort so I need to be more professional than I already am to get a good one. The first 2 I've done were great reviews, but everyone is different.

There is a lot more to massage than bringing a person in and rubbing their backs. I'm no kid. I work hard every day to be thought of as older than I really am. It's a nasty stab to be told something like that...

Hello My Freind

I excuse myself if I have to violate your intimacy. That must appear strange to you but I do not have an other choice to request your assistance because I am convinced that you are worthy of confidence for a partnership.

I present myself, Mrs.Wadja Jeanne Louise of Philippines.i stays the mistress of our former president, Joseph Estrada, and during his function with the head of the government, I was often to employed like a diplomat by depositing his goods in Europe and Africa because of my sincerity and my bonafide, but his wife legitimates Madam law and his/her son shows me to have marital relation with the president, this led to the manufacture of all kinds
of allogation against me just to discredit my honesty. We were stopped, his wife, her son, and me on July 27, 2003, following the coup d'etat to fail because I was employed with the presidency of the expresident Joseph Estrada. Freedom later was granted to me.

because there was no substantial obviousness against me, i was to release and I currently live in residence to supervise thus giving the limiting opportunity to me to reach the outside world to prove my innocence. All that I ask you now is to help itself has to make complaints of some funds which I have deposited in one limps mettallic auprés of company of safety in ivory dimension more precisely has Abidjan.

but the same company it is unaware of the exact capacity of the case because it was to record like the goods family. Will know that the other goods belonging to me were confiscated to me by the government of Mrs Gloria the new president of the republic of Philippines, this case was not confiscated to me because it is in Africa and in more I have my possession the certificate of deposit and the draft-agreement of deposit, these various documents
are in safety. The sum that I maintained in limps is 10 million dollars American, as it was the money which was censer to be to employ by the president to acquire real goods in Africa.

My principal goal to send this mail to you is because of the manner that I have to find you is worthy of confidence to give you this priority to receive the money case has any address which you think of being well in seccurity in your country in order to keep this sum in your account for the goal of the future investment with your percentage of which we will discuss soon.
I will send the various documents of the deposit to you to allow you to turn over in connection with the company of safety in my next email.

I say to you thank you and I await your answer impatiently because time for
me is very important.
Wadja Jeanne Louise

I dod one of those Lyrics Quiz's, and in order to make it worth it I found a bunch of questions all over the place.

Done using the vast number of songs from In Flames and when multiple answers fit, I used both.

1) Are you a male or female?
Clayman

2) Describe yourself:
Strong & Smart

3) How do you feel about yourself?
Dead Alone / Superhero of the Computer Age

4) Describe your ex boyfriend / girlfriend:
December Flower

5)Describe how you love:
Timeless

6) What would you do for the one you love?
Crawl Through Knives

7) Describe how you feel at the moment:
Morphing into Primal

8) Describe your current location:
Subterranean

9) Describe where you want to be:
The Quiet Place

10) If you couldn't be there?
Upon An Oaken Throne

11) Where do you NOT want to be?
Graveland

12) What's your super power?
Reflect the Storm

13) Your favorite color is:
Touch of Red

14) You know:
Everything Counts

15) What’s the weather like?
Vanishing Light

16) If your life was a television show, what would it be called?
...As the Future Repeats Today

17) What is life to you?
World of Promises

18) What is the best advice you have to give?
Brush the Dust Away

19) If you could change your name, what would you change it to?
Lord Hypnos

20) What is your favorite thing to eat?
Food for the Gods

21) What job would best suit you?
Zombie Inc.

22) Who do you look up to?
Man Made God /

23) Weapon of choice?
Moonshield

24) What would you stop to watch going on?
The Jester Race

25) What do you dream about?
Dreamscape

26) Favorite Game?
Pinball Map

Carrot Top Is Fucking Scary!!!

Well I had an interesting dream. Near the end, I was walking through the dorm hallways and this girl runs into my room and jumps onto my bed. Sure she was pretty and all, and she was refusing to get out of my bed and was burrowing under the covers,. You would think I would take this as an open invitation to crawl in for some bed fun. But then I noticed there was a kitten crawling out from under he blankets so I completely ignored this girl in my bed and started cuddling and playing with the kitten.

Common thoughts on ghosts is they are restless spirits who have unfinished business on this earth. I'm pretty sure If I were to die in a car crash or some other accident, I would be a ghost to the extreme.

I've been thinking a lot about many things lately, anything to keep my mind off Kathryn, and coming up with some interesting distractions. First off I am planning a road trip. So far I have decided it should be by bus to see more, while not having to drive or get a hotel. Second, I have 4 possible people along the way that I would like to meet. Maybe more, maybe less, it depends on who is where and how much time I have off from work though as a contractor, I can take a month off as long as I can afford it.
Second, what should I do when my body no longer allows me to handle my massage work? I love helping people. If anything, I feed off of appreciation and the knowledge I've helped people with their problems. It's when I feel useless and helpless that I start to get down on myself so for my current state of mind, I'm at least in the right profession to get what I need. I have enough training in the physical body to be able to go into Physiotherapy, but the extra training in all the nerves and dealing with people who have had amputations or are paralyzed for life, and the whole causing pain to clients thing just doesn't sound all that appealing to me.
My second choice would be sexual therapist. I dispense enough advice as it is, and if I could get professional training in it, my knowledge would finally be refined! It's just a toy thought I'm still playing with. May never happen, but it sounds like fun work.

Today, I place Random Thoughts Here:

I found something else that drives me insane. Guys who wear womens pants that use "Gay" as an insult, and actually mean it to be hurtful. What the fuck is up with that?

It's really sad when I of all people can relate word for word with a Good Charlotte song. Seriously. It's got a catchy tune that I would like, but being able to relate to the song is a completely different thing.

I have an easier time understanding the Indian people who call centers are being outsourced to than the French Canadian people they hire around here when calling me. I think I just agreed to health benefits for my Visa but I cannot be completely sure as I couldn't understand a word of what she said.

I've been in quite a slump lately. Kathryn finalized our "Break" earlier this month by saying "I think we should just stay friends". And then telling me earlier this week that she started dating again, and she asked him out to see Juno to get the ball rolling. I still feel I could wait forever for her, as I can't imagine finding anyone in this reality that could fit the mold of what I want in a girl better than her. The break up was more due to the distance than anything, though I screwed and embarrassed myself a few times, it would likely have been different if I could prove that it wasn't something I always do. I'm just hoping that whole "If you love something let it go , so on ans so forth." So I'm extremely lonely on the relationship front, and putting myself into a self-imposed bachelorhood, because I'm seriously tired of starting over. I guess I could explain it as feeling like an old couch. At first the couch is shiny and new and comfortable and then a few springs get loose, maybe a rip or a tare here, and then the old couch gets thrown next to the dumpster to be replaced by a new one, and then the old couch is left out in the rain, waiting for someone else to come along and thing "Woah, Free Couch!" and then over time, the couch gets more ratty and once again thrown to the curb. This happens enough eventually the old couch isn't going to be picked up again. I'm tired of being taken in just to have to go through the cub again. Doesn't help that earlier this week I found the ring I had proposed to her with. I don't know what to do with it but I feel I would regret reselling it.

It honestly wouldn't be so bad if I had some friends around this town. This whole Slump isn't just the "Single Mopes". I seriously have no company here. Everyone I've met so far is not the type of person I ant to hang out with. Nobody reads for fun, nobody enjoys fantasy video games, everyone I've encountered near my age range acts like some sort of Frat boy or Sorostitute. I've got no peers around here and I honestly enjoy my conversations at work with the 40 year old men and women than I do with the people my own age. Come summer I'm hoping that having more people around will at least find me find one single diamond in the rough. Just someone I can hang out with. Preferably a girl not because I'm looking for a new girlfriend, but I just feel more open around ladies.

I've taken to playing Doctor Phil for some friends on MSN, including my 14 year old cousin, a friend who's crush is in therapy for post traumatic stress and doesn't feel he could mentally handle a relationship yet, and another friend whose boyfriend is unreliable due to not being used to having a girlfriend committed to him.

And I've got my own lady friends online. I get plenty of company in the evening while at the same time feeling a little bad for hogging their attention. It's odd because in the past I have always seemed to fall for the first girl to be nice to me or show me attention when I'm at the low point of a breakup, but this time around, all I want are friends just to be friends. I feel like I'm done looking, I just can' reach out and have what it was I was looking for.

So that's my current state of mind.

I'm also learning to remember my dreams. I started by switching my sleeping location, which always yields dreams for me and easy to remember ones. Then upon waking up I lay there for about 5 minutes going over the dream and deciding if I want to remember it. I had a heart crushing dream last night so I am trying to forget that and blame it for my current state of mind. On the 31st I had an amazing dream with one of my favorite recurring dream characters, who seems to be the personification of all I feel I'm missing in my life right now. I even put her in a comic and the dream had a kiss that was just so intense I want to draw it. Probably TMI, but it's my diary so I'll write anything I want here. The problem with drawing is when I'm down I don't feel the inspiration to pick up the pencils even though they're on the other side of my bed and the new sketch books are laying on the chair within arms reach.

I'm just hoping for a happier future. You'd think I would have accumulated enough Karma by now to deserve some lasting happiness. But I guess there is more for me to do before I get my happy ending. There is no way I'm going emo. I actually believe life is going to get better, I am just feeling low because it's taking it's sweet fucking time.

Don't you want to punch kids in movies sometimes? Like those action movies where a parent tells their kid to stay in the car, and the kid counts to three and then disobeys and ends up putting everyone in danger because of it, or goes chasing after an animal into a burning building or city (I'm currently watching that Discovery Channel "Super Comet: After the Impact" thing and the little French bitch is doing this stuff)? Or being told not to do something else, like Don't use the phone in case an emergency cal comes through and the kid rolls her eyes and starts yakking to her fellow dip shit friends on the phone right when the call that is needed to save someones life comes in? I know they're put in there to add suspense but I just want to jump into the movie, break the kids kneecaps and punch him or her in the face a few times all the while screaming "What Part Of Everything Is On Fire, Stay Here Don't You Understand!?"

Ugg. If I had a spawn that stupid I would just let it run right into the blazing inferno.